cover of episode What to Say to a One-Upper

What to Say to a One-Upper

2024/12/3
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The Jefferson Fisher Podcast

People
J
Jefferson Fisher
R
Renee
Topics
Jefferson Fisher在节目中探讨了如何应对那些总试图“抢话”并使自己的经历听起来比你更好的人。他提出,面对这种情况,首先要理解并接受,这可能意味着对方并不真正倾听你的故事,也可能反映了对方内心的不安全感。他建议,应对“抢话”的第一步是允许对方这样做,这能让你了解到对方可能不值得你继续分享你的事情。第二步是设定私人界限,避免与“抢话”者分享更多信息,谨慎选择与谁分享好消息。第三步是轻松回应,表明你只是想分享,并非进行比较,例如,你可以说“那很好,我很为你高兴”,或者“我只是想分享一下我的经历”。他还建议,要反思自己分享的动机,并避免因寻求赞扬而分享。 对于听众Renee提出的如何在工作中避免无意中“抢话”的问题,Jefferson Fisher建议,在对方说完后,先提出一个问题来表示你的兴趣和参与,例如“你最喜欢的部分是什么?”,或者“请你详细说说”。这可以帮助你更好地倾听,并避免在对方分享完后立即分享自己的经历,从而避免无意中“抢话”。他还强调,在分享自己的故事之前,征求对方的同意,可以避免造成冲突感。 Renee在节目中分享了她工作中遇到的问题:她的同事说她爱“抢话”,她想寻求建议来避免这种情况。她承认自己有时会过度分享,并希望得到一些建议。

Deep Dive

Chapters
This chapter explores the phenomenon of one-upping, where someone tries to make their experiences seem superior. It suggests that this behavior often stems from insecurity, and advises listeners to respond with empathy and understanding. The chapter emphasizes that one-uppers might not be the best people to share personal achievements with.
  • One-uppers often act out of insecurity.
  • Responding with empathy can diffuse the situation.
  • It's okay to limit sharing with those who consistently one-up you.

Shownotes Transcript

You’re excited to share something you’re proud of, and then someone jumps in with, “Oh, that’s nothing—I’ve done [insert bigger, better thing here].”

It’s like they can’t help but make it a competition. Every win you share becomes their chance to one-up you.

At first, it’s just annoying. But over time, it starts to wear on you.

In this episode, I’m sharing 3 simple strategies to deal with one-uppers.

You’ll learn how to protect your peace, set boundaries, and stop letting these moments steal your joy.

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