Getting Older, Hotter, & Wiser (ft. Heidi Klum, Laverne Cox, Aly Raisman) [VIDEO]
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What is your daddy game? IT is your founding father, alex Cooper, with call. Hello, daddy ganging. Welcome back to another episode of call her daddy. I am so excited for today's episode because, as many of you know, I recently just turned thirty years old, and I have a lot that I want to talk about today because my perspective on turning thirty is so wildly different from what I thought I would be when I was Younger. Thirty years old sounded so freaking old.

And then when I got into my twenty years, I think I really viewed the number thirty as, oh, that's probably like that kind of just like when the fun ends. Like this is where IT all ends, you turn thirty and at all changes. And I will be honest, I found myself in my twenty is getting slightly anxious each year that I got closer to that number because when you think of thirty, IT feels like there is this connotation that comes with IT and an expectation of once you hit thirty, you essentially need to have everything figured out, right? Everything needs to be settled and lined up.

And if you don't have every single aspect of your life in order by thirty, your fact, and through this show and therapy and talking with my girlfriends and just growing up in general, I have learned that truly, that could not be farther from the truth. But I am aware, obviously, that like our perception of aging as women is so warped and so fucking negative. We all feel IT.

We all have experienced IT. Like IT is so wild and disturbing to me that there are literal middle school girls on tiktok doing nine step anti aging skin Carry tines. okay.

Did you just hear what I said? Not high school, middle school Young girls are doing nine step skin care routines on aging. Like, I didn't even know how to put fucking lotion on my.

I don't even think I put lotion on my face. In middle school, I use some water, a dove soap bar. We kept the buck in moving. okay.

I didn't even understand the concept of aging, but IT feels like unfortunately, I feel like each generation is just getting worse because of the accessibility obviously to the internet and all the procedures. And there is like nineteen million fucking products available now. And just overall anti aging, the pressure is everywhere.

But ironically, I realized IT kindly takes just aging and evolving to grow out of giving a fuck about IT, if that makes any fucking sense. And that's kind of what we're going to talk about today because honestly, now to me, thirty feels Young and I feel like i'm just getting started. So today I want to have a conversation around aging with a few women who have SAT in the call her addy studio with me.

They all have very different opinions and experiences. And I think there is something to be learned from every single person they earned here from today. So daddy, again, let's get into IT aliases. Man liberton talks hidy colum, welcome to color daddy.

Thank you so much for having me hi 没完。

As women, we are constantly judged. The older that we get, the harsher the criticism becomes. Everything from how we look, how we dress, who were dating, what age were dating at, and men don't experience the same ridiculed that we get. And so i'm curious what your experience has been as a woman in the public eye and out of the public eye with age.

I get the mini scot question all the time. Like, so how long are going to wear mini skirts? Like that is always like a question.

Like a mini skirt is always very you know, it's very, it's very much a thing, I guess. And i've said many times, I like I probably will be walking around at seventy if I feel like it's still with a many scope. I want to show my legs, you know, I don't know.

I feel like this is the process. So I look at that very how IT is yeah. No, I mean, I see all my flaws when I will, not so much anymore, because my ice side is getting worse. But I see my flaws, you know, and especially when I have the magnifying glasses and I, you know obviously but this is IT that's that's how life is, you know you you climb, you get older and then you IT gets IT goes down the hill again.

You know, with our looks and not being plump t anymore and this that the other, but at the end of the day, I still look in the mere and I feel good about myself and you know, I still have the passion for shopping for fun things and you know, putting on fun outfits and doing my hair and do my makeup, you know, maybe if that passion for dressing up and making yourself look cute, or or what do you think looks cute, you know, maybe then that's different then. But I don't have that yet. I still have the fire and me even though i'm fifty now and I can see the sixty over there, you know, turning fifty one in june, but it's still like, I love fun things and i'm still running around the beach with my book hanging out. I don't really care.

And yes, do they look like how they look before kids and they stuck their living daylight out of them? Like there are different now and that, and yes, things for pointing IT out, it's true. They're different because I had four kids in my best for them. And yes, yeah, you know.

So when someone asks you that about the mini skirt does IT annoy you or is IT just like you don't even think about IT anymore? Like, how does that affect you when people do objectify you to be like, no, you're too old to be doing that? Like.

how does that feel if they think that so be IT? I don't care again, you know, I I feel very strong with myself that even though people save those types of things, IT doesn't really get to me yeah yeah because I don't see IT that way. I look at myself.

And yes, my legs do not look like your legs. You're in your twenties. So it's very different obviously. But I still feel okay with my leg. Yeah no.

And therefore I go for IT and who knows maybe and i'm sixty and we sit here again, I might be like i'm done with the mini skirts because I don't feel IT anymore, right? But as long as I feel IT, I don't really care what people think or say to me. I I don't really know .

what i'm getting from you is like you don't give a shit like people can say, oh, hide's gotten older, hides done this or when you hit forty, maybe when you hit thirty, everyone had something to say, especially because you've done so public and your job has been a lot of IT is like your looks I always .

love when I pull up photos and they're all look at you here. Look at you there, you kind of chubby here, then you super skin. I'm like, guess also what you don't realize a for gate so i've been pregnant and then you know once you've had your baby, it's not like your story is flat immediately.

So you deflate a little bit. Everything is still little bit pudgie or what not. And I had that four times. So in out in the stomach, I mean, IT stretches to beyond and back. So you know, I love always when they get big pictures out and like, look at you here, look up pum you here i'm like, yes.

yeah. When you I guess my question is, like when these things are happening, like someone pointing that out, like does IT bother you at all or genuine, you don't care. That's what I was going to say, is like, I feel like you have such a unique energy that I think is enviable truly from women like I feel like a lot of us in the industry feel so frustrated by the fixation on I have get comments and like you're too old to be doing that now and i'm like.

i'm what like I what .

do they tell you i'm if i'm going out and like a drinking um and like having a fun night at a party. It's like that's kind of really immature and like you're too old for that now and like .

i've said IT before, like I twenty seven, nine yeah this is crazy. So now we now we're dead. After your dad, you're almost .

three going to be dead dead to drink alcohol. Yes.

I mean, sometimes I will be in the club and literally I might be the oldest person there I love in, you know but again.

I really don't care. That's what I think is is something that I think is a unique perspective. And I think we're really fortunate to have you as one of the people. It's going to speak on this because I feel like the more we can have that mentality as women of, like, I don't give a fuck, oh my god, my legs aren't. Obviously.

why don't we could have one thing in common? We will all die. There will be an end to all of this.

So why listen to all these negative noise? Surround yourself with people that are great, that are positive, you know, shake of all the nonsense, and just do you and do you, however big or small, how you wanna do? Some people want to cover up great.

I like some people want to be religious. Some don't do what you want to do. We only have that one life until we die.

So marry who you, anna, marry, yes, be with who you, anna, be with, where as many, many skirts as you want to can wear. And rock IT. I mean.

I understand you have to do whatever is allowed to do. I would never go to a country and obviously behave like that. Always very respectful of every, you know, I don't step on anyone's toes, but you know.

no, I think truly like IT couldn't be a Better answer. And I think IT, I hope a lot of women take that from like when I get a lot of women writing end of like people are saying like i'm either dressing two sexy at my job, i'm just wearing a pencil skirt and it's like, no, it's because the men can't control themselves because you're dressed appropriately.

It's like not we can wear what we want to wear and IT shouldn't be like you're a slut because you're wearing that like that has nothing to do with anything. It's just like why do we have to judge women on what they wear, what they look like? Let us just fuck and live a man.

yes. So the main thing that I took away from hidy is how SHE essentially fully rejects anyone's opinions around aging, and he has so much self love. IT is infectious. And IT was infectious when I was in the room with her. And I want to also be very clear, like IT is not lost on me, that hini colum is a frequent supermodel.

But I do think it's important to note that if we've learned anything from women sharing their stories is that I do not care how beautiful you are or how successful you are, every single woman experiences the universal feeling of being objectified, of being shamed for aging and being told what we should and should not be doing when we hit a specific, certain age, right? Like there is no right way to tackle each age, and there is no right way to act at each age. No one is too old to do anything.

Like, in my opinion, I feel like we need to stop saying someone is too old to be doing something or too old to be wearing something because, and I know this is like a really simple concept, because, but because we don't speak about IT this way, that does sound kind of funny when you say IT. Like, isn't the goal to get older? No, like, isn't the goal in life to get older? We want to live a long, happy, healthy life.

Why are we shaming people for doing that? And I know I personally have not experienced motherhood, but I was incredibly empowering, hearing heighty talk about embracing her body, changing throughout, having children like, I feel like a lot of women experiences the stress on some level of wondering what will happen if I get pregnant, right? How much weight will I gain? Will I be hard to bounce back? Will I be sexy anymore? Will I be able to return to my pre baby body? Like what i'm realizing is all of our bodies will change every single year that we're alive and every day that we get older.

No fucking shit, that is life IT is a privilege to age. So I don't know. It's just really odd to me that this concept is made to feel so fucking depressing and scary for women. Obviously, like no man hits thirty and everyone's like, oh god, it's going to know they're like, uh, he's entering his prime like thirty for women, for thirty for men is just different as is every fucking thing in life.

Men have an experience and everyone is like, yeah and women have an experience and there's like sixteen different daunting facts that someone's going to fuck and give you right um something I want truly everyone to walk away from. The episode gaining is more of that highty colum self love energy like again, I am aware I was in the room with a supermodel, and yet i'll be real. I remember feeling so confident in front of heighty and that day just being around heighty, because the way that Hardy spoke to me and about herself and women in general was really inspiring.

And I left wanting to just treat myself more than the way he does, right, like be more confident where whatever makes you feel good, embrace changes in your body and essentially do what makes you happy and fucking enjoy yourself. OK, i'm very excited to get into my conversation with liver cox now because with heighty, we were talking about essentially rejecting this fear around aging and leverage. Does an incredible job of explaining where this fear comes from.

So I just wanted to talk to you kind of about like the fascination of women as we age and the fixation on our looks and our bodies and our sexuality and how we express that, and how you felt about IT with society and also within yourself.

I have internalized so much ageism four years, until maybe three or four years ago, I lied about age. I started lying about my age when I was twenty seven. So I think, I think this would have been like twenty years ago.

And I took me many months, years, really in therapy, but i'd really started working on IT, like eight lake in twenty eighteen. I start like really trying to look, unpack the stories I told myself around aging. Part of this, the red dii date, is that i'm not horble not fucker.

I'm not data over the age, and that age was like thirty, honestly. So I was like, I just won't be when I turned for, I wasn't for you and I started to unpack all of that, how I D internalize that. And then I started looking around at my life and I was like, well, I over forty and i'm working.

I'm working a lot at a boyfriend at the time I was having sex. You know, I apparently was buckled data and hire able. And so all of the mith I had about being a woman of a certain age weren't actually the reality of my life.

I've had conversation so far and and this really helpful where a lot of women, including like a myself, it's like there's this like fear that we are like our worth is predicated on the way that we look as women. And a lot of IT we've just spent like objectified and people will be like, oh, you're not hot anymore oh, now you have wrinkles or oh, your sagging t or you're this or .

that is all that's real from all that's real for me. I think it's like even if I weren't an actress working on film and television in high deaf, that would be an issue for me. And fifty one years old, I I feel really blessed that melanin is such a wonderful anti aging thing.

But i'm also afraid of ijit. I'm afraid of, look, i'm not afraid of beijing. I'm afraid of looking old. I am that is the truth. That is the reality. And when I you know, there are little there are things that are happening as a fifty one, you're a woman, even though I think I look pretty good for fifty one there things that are happening that I see like, okay, have to deal and have to dress this and there is a lot of anxiety that I have about getting older and looking older and and .

when you say that deliver, like just to explain to people like as a woman, like what why do you have an anxiety?

IT IT is tight to patch jarque method y that i've internalized around my value for sure. IT is definitely tied to, you know, being commercially viable, being sexy, still being, you know, photog. And you know that all all these things being on magazine covers like runways, red bit, it's tied to my work, but it's tied to my sense of feeling attractive.

Well, I mean, I have a partner now who just like is so turned on by me, which is like, so awesome. It's great. But it's but that's not i've learned to the I an have always been to tried to to me not to be full me up.

But no, i've been good car for thirty plus years and what IT is. So if that's not, there is no, I mean, I don't like when I was Younger I may be valued that, but I I am a grown woman and that is not about that. It's about how I feel about myself.

It's what I want to see when I look in the mirror honestly. And but IT is about so much. IT is about viability.

It's kerry Foster who has this great blog um youtube chanel for harit talks about like social beauty hierarchy and talks about beauty is capital um with I initial her my podcast in beauty is capital there is when you look a certain way and you um and the hierarchy is is a Whites to premises beauty standard it's a Young beauty standard it's like you know it's that so big it's all the things right and when you're hire on that beauty hierarchy that is determined by certain capitalism and age and racism, in fact hobby and all these things, you there are things that you may or may not have access to. Um beauty isn't enough. There's so many beautiful man who don't get access to those things.

So there's it's not always enough, but there are things that you might have access to because of that. So it's it's about lose, it's about capital. It's about having capital in a capital this society. And luckily for me, when I didn't feel beautiful growing up, I always wanted to feel beautiful. I didn't feel I, I feel like I was a late bloomer.

R and so what the beautiful thing about my childhood is that the emphasis was about my talent in my intelligence and I know that i'm not on magazine covers just because, like, you know, I can quote bell hooks six minutes thought um that I i'm kind of cute. You know, I can take a good photograph and I know my angles because I practice and watch me because it's out model and so like yeah part a lot of my work is about how I look. But I also like know that like there are Younger women.

There's always a Younger woman who's pretty than me. There's tons of women who are Younger and pretty and what else is there? So I I don't so it's sick and hard.

It's it's hard and I haven't I don't know if I have an answer. What I do love is that at this age, and we be fifty two and may is that there's less I give fewer fox at this age, and that's amazing. And i'm able to care for myself Better and set Better boundaries.

I have resources for skin care. I'm grateful that I know even they the black on cracking, but I ve taken good care of myself. I've never done drugs.

I've never drank in excess other sings, age, you, I of the sun. So i'm grateful for all that stuff. But like when the age starts showing, i'm probably going to have a face lift to do something, probably do something.

Of course I like, oh, I think I would want one to and then I my pause, why and I think that where there is no answer today and I .

there's great bed lifts too. Like there is really interesting, like the early make its based lips allegedly tell some the celebrity is who were like in the late there getting baseload and my girl and they look good. But hopefully I will new time soon.

You looking amazing. Thank you. I feel, you know, I think I clean up nice. I think I look good in the morning too sometimes but it's something it's on my mind and over fifty, it's like it's on my mind. I love what you said though.

And we can even like just end IT on that because I I agree there is no solution because IT is rooted in the pay arch. And right there is like social capital that you can gain the like. If you are more attractive, you can get these things that's not gonna like fulfill u in life.

But IT is a fact. But I do think like you're so bright, oddly, as much as it's been told to us as women, like when you get older, it's terrifying. I have found about to turn thirty and everyone's like, oh my god, you so nervous about being thirty and the work that i've done myself in therapy, I finally like absolutely fucking not i'm not scared because i've never felt more sure of myself.

I've never felt more confident in my own skin. I was so insecure when I was Younger. I was.

you have a career too. For me, so much of my life is about a career when I turned thirty. And I had not made IT yet.

That was my, that was my trauma. I was like, that was the age, the big age thing for me. With that, I hadn't achieve my goal shed when I was thirty.

I was supposed to be a superstar by the time I was thirty, and I was far from IT. I wasn't one when I was forty. You know, I was going to quit acting when I turned forty.

So a lot of IT was about around success and like milestones around success that set for myself that didn't happen on that time line. Gos time, not my time. So a lot of IT was about that.

But yet when the british, and with amazing my, we were talking and he was saying how wonderful IT is for her in her fifties, and that the opportunities are different. There is something wonderful about this age, if there really is, there is wisdom. I I know Better.

I treat myself Better. There are certain things that I will not abide. I I have seen some of the fruits of my labor, and that is unbelievable.

I own, I own a home. I own two homes um which is condos, but still on a condo. Girl, I didn't deal with the house.

House is too much. Much is especially when you traveling. Life is good and i'm so blessed and so grateful. And what i'm most grateful for is i've done the work.

And when I say the work, i've been a lot of work, then the work of myself, that I can actually be in my body and be like that. This is the kid who disassociated because of trauma. I've done specifically specific trauma resilience to work so I can be in my body.

So i'm sitting here now. I feel my feet on the floor. I feel myself in this chair.

I am in my body and inhabiting IT and at peace in IT and that um it's amazing like I love my body, you know I these these are really wonderful things and it's so funny because when I looking back on mike, thirty old, the vern, which was constantly picking myself apart, and I look back at pictures and i'm just like pitch the meta lisp, just the metabolic you should have been so fucking grateful for that thirty year old metabolic, that twenty one, your metabolic, you were beating yourself up. IT was such a waste energy. IT was such. But I, you know, the only way, you know is to go through IT.

Di gang, I think that leverage did such an incredible job of explaining women's worth being so heavily tied to their appearance. Azov n said, there is always gna be a Younger, pretty, hoder woman out there. So how can we build ourselves into someone that we're proud of outside of our appearance, right?

Like when I look at my life, no matter what the fuck my face looks like, I have built this career. I have built amazing friendships. I have built a healthy, incredible marriage so far.

I have interest and passions and perspectives that could never be taken away, no matter how fuck in g, you might just get, okay. These things could be rock bottom. These things could be to the mother buckin ankle slowing at low.

Okay, but I still have my, maybe I wouldn't have my career. Now i'll just start doing more audio. nothing.

I'm just kidding. The point is I will still have my career. I will still have those relationships. IT doesn't fucking matter. And I want to say to the daddy game, like if you're stress about aging and how it's going to change the attention that you get from men or the way that you're treated in society, my advice is to first acknowledge that you cannot avoid aging.

You need to build out the aspects of life that have nothing to do with how you look and find self worth outside of your appearance, right? Like building a full life for yourself is, in my opinion, now, but i've turned thirty. How you build confidence, like, as i'm going to continue to age, I pray when someone is describing me, I hope that my appearance is the last thing they mentioned.

If anything, i'm happy if they don't even mention my appearance. Like at this age in my life, I would be so honored if someone's, oh, Alice Cooper, she's super smart, hard working fun, great to be around, not just like, oh, ah, she's so fuck and hot there is so much more to me. There is so much more to all of you than just the way we look like.

Don't allow anyone to reduce you to a visual because bitch visuals get boring. okay? We're always like, what else is there? What else is new? We don't want to just rely on the exterior, and I think that gets lost on us a lot.

A lot of IT has to do with vanity. I myself constantly find myself being like alex, like a stop. Why the fuck are you like setting what you're looking at and any more botox? And was I know I need to do a Better job and that's why this episode is so important to me right now.

So um I am so excited to have you guys listen to eman on this topic. Ali talks about how her life at thirty is not what he planned and not what he expected. SHE thought he would be married with children at this point, but he is currently single.

And I think so many women can relate to the concept of. You have a certain idea and plan and milestones that you won a hit. And then all of a sudden, the plane is out the window.

You didn't hit any of those specific milestones. Your life looks way different than what you thought I would be, and it's hard to not feel like you're doing something wrong. But it's so inspiring to hear ali talk about while it's not what we expected, SHE has never felt more short of herself and she's never felt happier. As someone who just turned thirty.

I feel like maybe my experience might be different than some other women in. And I feel very grateful that I feel like the older i've gotten, I think the more confident and i've gotten in myself. And I actually hope that a lot of women are all women experiences that.

But I think that, as you mention, there is like ageism in our society, and people are really critical of women. And I feel like as i've gotten older, I have more figured out who I am. I've feel like i've kind of like come into myself more like.

I feel like I more in my body and more comfortable. I feel more relaxed. I still obviously have many days in moments where I still I still have so much work to do on myself, but I feel more confident in how I look now than I did when I was in my early twenty years. And I think that maybe that just comes with time and age and maybe just doing a lot of therapy and also recognizing like if I go on a date with someone, are in front of someone and they don't make me feel good, they're being mean to me like that night, someone I want in my life. And so I think learning the importance of like support system in community and surrounding myself with people who are there for me and chAllenged me in ways that healthy and help me be Better, I think has been very important.

That's beautiful. I I appreciate you sharing that too because I think that gives women something to like be hopeful for that they can get to that point also because obviously I know immediately, just like when women get older and were just like, oh, e's old now or would I like it's just frustrating.

But I remember I went down like your teammates called you grama ally at your first olympics, even though you were only eighteen years old, you were the grandma of the team. And I think the industry of gym na S S I S as a whole IT like views your worth basically in its primary a teenager. And so aging, I think, becomes like a little bit more exasperated in that community and in that field.

How has has that complicated your relationship to aging? Like to be called a grama at eighteen years old. And like what you couldn't have a legal drink, you can even regia car.

I was actually, I was in twenty sixteen and I was twenty two. They called me grama, which is still twenty two but still it's you know it's funny yeah I think that that is interesting thinking about and I feel like they still joke economy grammar so I think I always maybe felt this pressure to be like a mom figure and I didn't want to let anyone down and I always like wanted to just make sure I was like seeing the right thing and doing the right thing.

But I feel like even at thirty, I feel like i'm twenty two now or how like I wish I felt at twenty two, like I still feel Young and I feel good and I feel like i'm just i'm excited to get older because I feel like the older I get, the more I like figure out my style and what I feel comfortable wearing, what I want to wear like I feel more comfortable in my body as I already mention, I just feel more comfortable speaking up for myself. So I think that IT is something I think about the words and i'm like, I can't believe i'm thirty where I feel like I think societies hopefully changing where like thirty doesn't feel so old anymore. But I felt like I was so old when I was Younger and now I still feel so Young and I have so much of my life.

But I don't know. It's funny when I hang out out with people who are like in their early twenty, like depending on who IT is, it's funny just to see like the age difference are like seeing myself in them like it's just interesting. I feel like with gymnastics I had teammates and friends at, like all different stages of lives.

So I had some friends who are much shoulder than me, some who are much Younger. And so it's just really cool. I also feel like age doesn't matter at the same time, like if I hang out, one of my team is like twenty two and i'm thirty like IT doesn't feel like yeah or maybe in a good way.

I feel like i'm twenty two with them and we're having the best time together. So I feel like as I get older, IT doesn't really matter, but we make IT matter so much, but there is so much pressure, like with how we look. And I I like, admire so much the people who are like as they've you gotten older, like they just have been so honest here in the public guy as women are like what they're experiences because it's hard to share their their experience.

And I also think like you and I were in a time where it's more it's so much more acceptable to talk about things and it's like cool to be vulnerable were like I can imagine, you know, ten, fifteen, twenty years ago being so famous in the things they used to write on the tabloid. And maybe ten years ago isn't even like maybe that maybe it's still is happening today. People are still brutal.

But I just like sometimes when I look back at some of the articles that they used to write about people, it's just horrific. And I can imagine what so many female celebrities have gone through, like the trauma of that, like I throw my life, like my weight has fluctuated ated in people. Of course, i've ve like written mean things online, which is just, it's terrible. But for the women who are like, literally gain a pound and they are like inviting to and they write the nasie things about them is just so mean. And I can even believe that something that is allowed, that people do that is just like, no wonder women feel so much pressure.

You're so right. And I even think when you're saying that about like those tabloids, just like the effect that that had on like more Young women that are sitting at home like looking up to these women and they're like, this person, is that at at and it's like, or this person is so and erect and it's, how are we writing this on tablet? Because then if a woman of a Young girl looked at those things, that was like, but I looked like that.

So when I fatter, M I an oxygen, do I have any need to look whatever IT is, whatever the tablets felt so comfortable to write? I agree with you. I think it's IT.

Is there so much emphasis on women's looks from everything externally? So it's hard as a woman to like, not think like, oh my god, am I getting older? How do I look? And we all will have a moment where we deal with that. But I love what you're saying. And that made me like excited and happy for women.

If we can look at at this way where you're like, I feel so much Better and I feel so much more myself and I feel the same like people keep asking me like, how do you feel when you know you're in turn thirty soon? And i'm like, I feel like i'm already thirty. Like, I feel i'm thirty five.

Like, I feel i'm forty. Like I I feel like there's a shift that happened recently for me where I feel so much more sure of myself and I feel so much more like aware of what I want and who I am and what makes me happy. And I look back at my Younger self and.

As amazing as I like was, and I want to cheer my cell phone. And back then, I am also like, girl, you had no idea of so many things. You allowed certain things to happen to you.

You wouldn't speak up for yourself. You weren't selfish red, you weren't confident. Like there are so many things that like came with experiences and growth.

And so it's like when we look at all these Younger women and sure at like face value win, like what cause men are like, oh, those eighteen year old are so hot. Like, okay, but I feel so much Better now than I was at eighteen. And I not to say that eighteen wasn't fun, but like, we have more to look forward to as women.

And I think if that is what the narrative can be, more women will celebrate each other, rather than like comparing and freaking out and wondering, like, what do I have to get done or or should I not get anything done? Or how do I look and what am I like? Embrace that. Like aging is a privilege and it's fun. And it's like, oh my god, I feel Better than ever and we're both about to be like, yeah, in our thirties like, let's go I feel like this is gonna the best jackie yeah yes.

I so excited. I also think when you were Younger, like you did the best that you could, we're all doing the best that we could. So I feel like we're often so hard on ourselves, but like we all did the best that we could with what we knew and what we had at the time.

But I think like to people's questions to and people like how you feel about turning thirty, like why we just feel like, congratulations that's so exciting. Like, you know, making IT more of a positive because IT is such a privilege to be able to be thirty, to be able to feel good and to be healthy. And I think you're right.

I think there is this like fear that a lot of women have or it's like, oh my gosh, and I still gonna like attractive as I get older. But like, I think it's sexy and attractive and IT should hopefully you to other people like when you're more comfortable in our own like bodies and in our mind and word like that is hard yet exactly. IT should be .

more just like a woman that's like in her forty, fifty, sixty that is like walking around just like confident, like I want to be here. You can feel IT but again, it's like because she's gone through shit and SHE now like you said, I don't care anymore like you don't care about those little things that just like growing up you do and like your frontal low isn't even developed to like what like twenty three.

So like, yes, i'm excited and I think that you're right. It's instead of saying, like how do you feel about turning thirty? It's like, oh my god, I can just see IT on you. Like this is about to be your best here. Yes, yes.

Like you just feel so like I can just tell you're radiating .

are telling me telling it's about to be the best ever. And so every year that we continue to live and getting new experiences like IT just gets Better yeah.

And also like people don't talk enough about when you're in your twice. It's like you're figuring out who you are and and like to any person listening in there twenty like I wish I could go back in time and tell myself like you can and you should communicate what you need and if someone doesn't listen to you, like that on them and there they don't deserve to be in your life if they're not going to be supportive.

So I also want to Normalize that. You know, when you're dating in your twenty is like it's important, it's cool and IT should be like the cool thing to like empower each other to like ask for what you need and be supportive. And if you both realize, like this is not a fit, that's also cool.

You both what you show us, go on your way. But like, I want Young girls and women to whether there you know twenty one or thirty or forty, to like, feel, empower, to know that what they want is is allowed and it's OK. And it's important to find people who support that, like a partner in dating who makes them feel good. And they should also empower their partner to also speak up to.

I just love allies mentality on this entire topic, because he feels like a breath of fresh air with her view on turning thirty, like a lot of my friends are turning thirty and they don't all approach IT with such excitement. I, but I feel like ali was able to put into words the beauty of taking the time to figure out who you are and truly getting to know yourself, because working on yourself and discovering who you are does not stop at thirty.

If anything, in my opinion, thirty is like a fucking and awakening. okay? Thirty, in my opinion, is right when you really are starting to get a hold of what you want, what makes you happy, who you are, what you value in life.

Like confidence is a really a big word that I like intended himself. I could do like forty fucking episodes on confidence, but I think when IT comes to aging and confidence, there are two ways that you can look at IT. You can look in the mirror and you can go, shit.

I have wrinkles now, and i'm not as Young as I once was, and I will never look as good as I used to. And I need to do everything I possibly can stop this, which is allowing, again, aging, to just completely destroy your confidence and own your life. Or you can do the ally approach, which is to look in the mirror and go, damn, look at everything i've accomplished, everything i'm equipped to do, and what an amazing life i've built for myself.

And it's just going to keep getting Better. And I love that only takes this approach into dating to all my single digging out there. Like when you get older, you are not going to accept the same study treatment from guys at thirty then you would when you were twenty.

Having all of those years of experience means years of recognizing red flags may be engaging in some of the toxic and being like, no, no, no, but you literally couldn't you couldn't trick me into your trap of you fucking tried. I know what toxic looks like and smells like. I'm not fucking interested. I know that red flag i've there before.

Like, we go through shit and we learn from our experiences and years of dating will lead you to know what you don't want to put up with in a relationship, right? So daddy gang, I I hope hearing from hindy levers and ally, just like, I don't know, maybe IT helped shift your perspective on the importance of accepting and embracing getting older like IT is so deeply and grain and us to fear aging and to want to avoid IT and feel the need to put ourselves down and feel like we aren't as valuable the older that we get. I think this is especially true if you grow up in a household where maybe your mom was always picking herself apart, maybe making like very negative comments about her body and her wrinkles, like not liking the way that he looked in the mire, like IT is really hard to break out of that way of thinking.

And if it's not coming from your household, you're definitely seeing IT on social media. Every single post these days feels like it's like buy this, put this on your face, like sleep with this thing on your head and like get this procedure. And here's a ten step program of how to basically not look like yourself.

IT is everywhere, and IT is all too much. Life goes by so fast, I don't want to spending the majority of IT feeling insecure and dreading, if not the most beautiful aspect of life, which is getting older, having more life experiences, having more time with friends and family and holidays and all of IT. We just get to experience more.

I hope when i'm forty, I look back at turning thirty and think, wow, I had so many amazing things ahead. I didn't even know how good IT was gona get. And that's how I feel.

Now, looking back at my twins, I also know there is a lot of women listening today, and we could be a completely different points in life, right? You may be listening and you may have three children, or you may be listening and you are currently single. I want to make sure it's clear, like this specific conversation i'm having today with you guys does not revolve around the specificity of your relationship states, your dating life, your homelife.

That's not what this is about. It's a mindset. The point is, after listening to this episode, I hope that you can completely change your view to reject anti aging culture, reject the negativity uc online, reject the ads and the constant fiction on the external things, and choose to focus on being happy and being present and living life the way that you want to and not allowing yourself to feel defeated every single year that you get older.

But instead, which i'm trying to do now, is feel so grateful and excited to get to know yourself a little bit more every single year. So daddy, again, I love you. Um you sexy, beautiful, spicy little bitches cheers to getting older and to being alive like I think that IT sounds so crazy, but it's like when I see these things on social media of people like judging someone for getting older and like bitch, you would be so blessed you would be so blasts if you're looking at, look, look at the way we look at our moms and our grandmothers. Like, I SAT with math grandmother the other day, and she's a hundred years old in december, so you will be one hundred and one years old. And the way that he talks about her life is so fucking inspiring.

And he has that thing that I admire so much when I was talking about heighty like that confidence of, just like, I fucking love my life and I love my family, and i'm just so grateful to be here and not letting these little things like make you feel you're in a cage and you're uncomfortable and you, anna, get out of your body like own IT and have a good time because we're, if I can hear once and I know it's corny to say, but like, I think we've fuck and miss that sometimes I think we we're on social media all day. We're like writing these things look like I need to get this time that you don't need to do anything that you don't, anna, do and so next time that you're feeling insecure, pause and go touch some fucking and grass because I have been doing that lately and actually really fucked and helps. Um okay, I love you, daddy ging, I hope this episode was what you needed to hear this week. I will see you fuckers next one's day.