LIVING WITH CRICKETS! -You Should Know Podcast-
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Really interested in like the language of the crickets. It was crickets! You smell like a Labrador Retriever after it just did a trick. You smell like six-year-olds that just played in Play-Doh. You smell like Legoland. You smell like a trampoline park, you nasty freak. No, not turkey. Well, hmm, kinda. Not turkey. What the? Who was that? Well, hmm, kinda. Not turkey. The You Should Know Podcast. We're back!

Hey everybody, welcome back to the usual podcast episode 88. Round of applause. Please, my panties are inside. Put some limon on it. Hey, welcome to the usual podcast episode 88. Thank you so much for coming back to the happiest place on earth. If you're new here, if you haven't already, leave a below, use the subscribe button. Press your on. If you're looking for more

Hello, then you said comment section isn't fulfilled with your name. Guess what even more wrong go ahead and fill that out put some lemon on it. Guys, hope you had a fantastic turkey day had all the omelets and green tea as you wanted. You know what I'm saying? On a Wednesday afternoon half past noon. Hello, good morning to you and everybody you love. Guys, we are a mere two weeks away.

From the You Should Know Podcast live show in Los Angeles, we have about 20 to 30 tickets left. Los Angeles, I'm telling you, this is the show to be at. The link for the tickets is in the description below. This is almost your last time to act. If you want to come, if you've been thinking about coming, if you're in the greater California area and you're thinking, well, somewhere around Michigan,

Probably not. Come to this LA show. We cannot wait to see you, meet you, shake babies, and kiss hands. Good morning to you. How you doing? We love you so much. Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. Oh, we got Kyle Harris kicking the studio. I'm going to need you to put some Lamar.

How you doing, Cam? You're here. Got you too soon. Riva Dirt, you rewind and do hopscotch on three legs. Hello. Spank my ass on a Thursday. Call me Roxanne. Good morning to you. How's it going? How's the coffee? Turkey or sausage? Put some... Cam, how was your week? How was your turkey feast? Bubba, did you eat everybody's plate? I...

How was that? Did you leave every neighbor's house with their leftovers? Were you a vulture? Yeah. No, I did. So we went to Oklahoma, as you know. First thing I asked was, how was it? It was good. But if I say that, it's boring and great. But it's the way that you answer the question. You say, hey, it was fantastic. We did this. It was fantastic. Not we did this. And then whatever. Okay. Restart. Nope. You just answer. Okay. Put some limona.

It was fantastic. We went to Oklahoma, got to see both sides of Liv's family, had two Thanksgivings. Your boy was chunky. Your boy got a lot of weight. Dropped it right back off, though. But, if you know what I'm saying, Browns to the Super Bowl. Hello. Anyway. Close the door. Make sure you light a candle. Spray a lot. Turn on the fan. But. Oh, my God. I have a question. Thanksgiving was fantastic. What's your dying to know question? You ever pooped at a foreigner's house? Oh, 100%. And you run the sink?

Oh, I have a way worse scenario than that. Wait, what did you do? I want to say I was 10, and I didn't understand. I think at the time I thought every room was soundproofed. That's his first mistake. It's a horrid mistake. No infrastructure is like that. So basically in... You're very erect right now. You're like so upright. I'm what? I'm kidding. Put some limon on it. Put some limon on it.

I was about 10 years old. I was at my Aunt Karen's house. It was Thanksgiving. About 20 people in the house. I go to take a poop. Hello. Downstairs bathroom. Very close to the kitchen. Right corner pocket. Right there. Corner pocket. Eight ball. How's it going? Reba Durchy, bitch. Everybody's there, okay? For whatever reason, this is the ADHD kicking in full effect. I immediately start to reenact the Phantom Menace from Star Wars. Okay? Okay.

The dialogue or the action? An action scene. When Obi-Wan is retreating. Actually, this is Clone Wars. He's retreating from Jango Fett and Boba Fett. And they're shooting the cannons. And it sounds like... I literally start doing that. Yeah, it's a base. It was like a whale communication down there. It was bad. Oh, no, no. I'm not talking about my ass. I literally was screaming this from my mouth in the bathroom. Not knowing my entire...

Entire family. Was there things coming out of you when you were doing this? This was post-poop. Oh, so you were lingering in your stench. Poop's already happened. It's been flushed. I took a two-minute monologue to stare at myself in the mirror, and I was going, eww.

doing these explosion noises and I literally did it for two minutes straight. I walk out, every human being is staring at me and I was like 11 and I was like traumatized. It was horrible. I ran upstairs, I turned on Smack That music video by Akon and I started playing Millsberry. Not for me.

But it was the hell of a, it was like the first time I realized people could hear me. My mom said, what the hell were you doing? And I was like, who's Star Wars? Funny thing about you, I... I'm stupid. Well, everybody knows that. It's not funny. It's actually quite concerning and annoying. Okay. One thing about you, I communicated with your dad after Thanksgiving. Okay. Talked to good old Mike. Apparently, and this is, Cam doesn't even know that I know this, and he doesn't even know this. His family knows this. Your neighbors talk to your family.

Cam went door to door after, because Cam grew up with the neighbors. It's the same neighbors he grew up with. He went door to door to these neighbors that he hasn't talked to in years and asked them if they have foil plates for him. He was getting leftovers from other people's homes to take back here. That did not happen? If I go in your fridge right now, is there not foil plates from your neighbor's house? Absolutely not. Oh, you already ate them? Yeah.

Foil plates from my neighbors at a grown-ass man age is despicable. You went Christmas caroling to ask for leftovers. I went when I was younger once. Okay. But they invited me. No, this time I'm talking about you went about five houses down. You went door to door like you were spreading the word of Jesus. God, no, not five houses down. I said...

Mind if I sing a quick tune for you? I brought my book. Do you have any extra stuff in the yams for me? Instead of payment, I'll just take greens if that's alright. This isn't Christmas caroling. What do you think about Christmas caroling? I don't think it's real. I don't think that's a facade. Oh, I've seen it with my own eyes. You've never opened a door and there was a gang of six that just came from church. I swear on my life. No, you didn't. I swear on my life. Christmas songs. What song?

I don't know the exact name of the song. It was a group from the church. I was at my house. It was a group from the church we went to. So they made it a point to go to all the church members' houses. What is the purpose of that? I don't... Is it to spread Christmas joy?

For little boys and girls. I can turn on the Hallmark channel. I can get a good Christmas joy out of it. I hate Hallmark movies. But they're so bad, it's so good. They're so bad that my mom's obsessed with them. She sheds a tear every one. I'm like, I get it. The guy's going to die. The dog is cute. The girl's a bad actress that had the cast in Hallmark. And that's it. And it's like the bad guy's going to die. Yeah. There's no curveballs. No, no, no.

Starts good. Little turmoil. Really bad climax. End of the movie is always happy. Horrid movies. Shit watches. But I enjoy a good bad movie. You know what I hate about movies? What? I hate when you have to read movies. What?

I hate that. Like actual like font is on the... Yes. So I've been doing... I watch like two to three movies a night. Yeah, you do. A lot of Afghani insurgents. I love war movies. And what I hate about movies is I've learned this recently by myself. When they... You know whenever they put the establishing shot and they have the typewriter going of like where they're at? God, I love that. But what I do is I...

If it's a word I'm not familiar with, I go, that's Bangladesh. Afghanistan. Got it. I knew that. I never know where they're at unless it is said dialogue. I will skip. I can't do it. And like Spider-Man. I was watching Spider-Man. There's a lot of text bubbles. Which one? Oh, well, yeah. Well, that's like a comic. Yeah, I know. And I appreciate it. It's like, pfft, Spider-Man 2029 or 2099. I hope you're not reading that shit. Yeah. I,

I want to be... I'm brain dead when I watch a movie. Dude, Liv, when we went and watched... So she never saw the first Miles Morales. And she was like, oh my God, there's so much hype. Let's go see the second one. I was like, all right, do you know what it's like? She's like, no. I'm like, it's like a comic. She's like, what do you mean? I'm like, it's like animated. She's like, no, I see that. I'm like, no, no, no. It's like you're watching a comic book. She's like, okay, we go. She was furious. Really? Because she's so... Her...

She hates closed captions. She hates the captions on things. She hates bright, quick movements. Oh, that's definitely not the movie for you then. She literally was sitting down and she was like, I'm getting sick, babe. I was like, you act like it's the motion sickness. Oh my God. She hated it. The colors in the movie are so good. It's crazy. It's fantastic. I'm not going to lie. For someone like...

definitely live but anyone else like a random person that didn't know what to expect and they go into that thing and it's spider-man there's like yeah yeah scenes going colors shooting everywhere like it'd be a lot i have a thing about you i think you're getting worse at what up here i think you're losing it a little bit you think i'm losing what like your control control of my brain i'm losing i think i think there's something going on there that's it's starting to trail off the path

You're getting worse. What past? It's getting less and less enjoyable to be around you. Like, it's getting like... What is happening? It's almost like I feel like I need to be paid. Why don't... Like, part-time job to be around you. Does this need to be on the camera? Or do we need to have a hard time? Like, what is happening right now? What is happening? You just got so small. When you did your legs like that, you looked so small. And... No, no, no. Explain yourself. That's it. You get it. I have no clue what you're talking about. It's just like...

I'm just becoming a pain to you. You're becoming... I am becoming an annoyance. You're becoming like a sheltered dog that you wish you could return. Wow. A sheltered dog. You know how y'all felt about Max during the end? I loved Max. I love you. But sometimes it's just a pain. Gotta get rid of him. There's a better home somewhere. I know someone else will take better care. I love you, but I want to stay. I don't want to be given away. Oh, no. We're too far in now.

See, but I want to stay because you actually want me to stay. You know whenever you've been in a marriage, you don't know, but you've been in a marriage for about 40 years and you just... I've been in one for like a year and a half. Yeah, but when you're 40 and you know those old miserable couples, they're just life bonded at this point, so they're not going to go through the stress of breaking up. That's where we're at. That's really hurtful. Okay, and I say that to say, be nicer to me.

Kiss me sometime. Not, well, maybe not that. Hug me and appreciate me because there's an 88 episodes of this where I'm flirting. I'm loving. I'm trying to get something out of you and you act like I'm the, I'm a, I'm a gum on the bottom of your shoe and it's going every time you take a step. You're the rude one to me. You're the rude one to me. Why does it sound like that? You're the rude one to me. Don't get it twisted. Damn.

Hey, why? Because, okay, if this camera, if we had a reality show and it was rolling 24-7. I want one. The amount of, hey, bitch from you to me that would be on camera is, someone would create an HR department just to fire you, just to get you deported. What? Be careful. Yeah, that's a, can I, can they fire me?

I don't know. If the HR department's under me... They can put you on suspension. That's when I have to have a board meeting. But that's the whole thing, though. The HR is not below you. The HR is to protect everybody. But if I'm paying them... The HR is to protect everybody. But who's paying them? The LLC. The company.

Which you own. But I'm saying... But think about it. The reason that... You could definitely do some backwards shit in terms of business. I can't just fire the HR? No. Who fires them? That's the board and the decisions. But if I hired the board... Exactly. That's what I'm saying. You can do some monopoly type shit. Like, hey, your car's not going to work. Your dog's going to be dead if you don't shut your mouth. You get some P. Diddy and blow up the car. Exactly. But that is the point of HR. Nobody is above the company. Just because you're the owner doesn't mean you can...

verbally assault me on the daily when there's an HR. But we don't have an HR so he does verbally assault me. And you verbally, you physically assault me.

Put some limon on it. Put some limon on it. But I was going to say something to you. You've said a lot already. You've said that I hurt you, that you want to get rid of me like I'm an old dog that has fleas and bad skin. I relate my love to like a kindergartner. That's how I show love. You know how like when you're in kindergarten and you have a crush and you pull the girl's hair? I pull your hair. No, you pull some other things. Hello, good morning. How's it going? Put some limon. Dark roast or vanilla? You like vanilla. But you know what I'm saying? Hello.

You know what I'm saying? Whenever you're... I have a crush on you. It's interesting because you're not six years old anymore. People would argue. Mentally. Yeah. Physically, you're not. You've been on this earth for...

You have a soiled brain. You have a worse brain than me. No, no. I have a dark brain. Yeah. You have a dirty brain. Yeah. Dark or dirty? Pick your poison. Be careful. Dark, weird things. Dirty, weird things. I'm joking, but I pick on the people I like. If I'm overly nice to you all the time, it means I don't really care about you.

You heard it here first. You know what I mean? So maybe I need to start being nice to you. Drop a gym. Whenever the day I come in here and give you flowers... Say you're like a coach.

If I'm up your ass and doing all this other thing. That means I see the best in you. I know your potential. Okay. Yeah. Dude, coaches are good people. Good ones. Some people. That's a very broad and wrong statement. But a coach is a hard job. Yeah. A coach is damn near. A lot of jobs are hard. Yes, but I'm saying what comes outside of the actual job itself. Like a coach is, it's tough. It's tough. Okay, and your point? I've seen it. Just it's tough. Coaching is tough, man.

Shout out coaches. Coaching's tough because it's tough. Yeah, so that is the thing about you. You do not. You derailed it, not me. No, I'm saying you didn't. You see how I ask you questions every week. How was your Thanksgiving? You act like I don't celebrate. You act like I don't have family. You act like I don't. You know what I mean? I don't know if you do, Karl Marx. Who the hell is that? Who's Karl Marx? Who's that? I had a coach named Jordan Marx. Cool guy. He was in a fraternity.

Carl Marx? Stop talking about Jordan Marks. Who the hell that is? You know Carl Marx. No. Carl Marx. Say it again. Carl Marx. Okay, who is it? Like the father of communism. Why would I know that? Why would I care about him? Is he a good guy? Is he a bad guy? I don't know anything about anything. That's why I talk about funny things here. More precedent, yes. He's a good president? He's not a president. You just said a good president. I said more precedent to you not knowing anything.

There's more evidence. Why are we talking about presidents? I'm so confused. Oh. What are you saying to me? Hey, clean your ear canal. I have good ears. No, you don't. I have good ears. No, you do have good ears. I'll give you that. You have good ears. Those cute little hoop earrings. Hello. You're doing something to my inside. I can't do it more. Ask me how my Thanksgiving was. You know what? I will. Okay. Under one condition. Hello. You answer what I ask. You don't derail. Okay. You don't take...

You're gonna drown yourself one day. You don't derail and you listen to me. I'm listening. First question. Hello. Did you enjoy it? Did you enjoy your Thanksgiving? I did have a good Thanksgiving. Was it fun? What all did you do? Uh, hang out with family, football, my dog, Malcolm. Yeah. Shout out, Malcolm. All right. Oh, okay. Actually, this is a decent question. That was bullshit. This is a decent question. Do you eat traditional Thanksgiving food? Like turkey, ham, all the fixings, stuff like that? Uh, yeah. No, well, well not, no, not turkey. What?

Not turkey. Who did you just turn into? You said, well, hmm, kinda. Not turkey. What the fu- Who was that? That was not- You said, well, hmm, kinda. Not turkey. Who was that? You turned like Scottish. Like a Scottish librarian. I didn't.

Rewind the t- you literally said, "Yeah, well, kinda. Not turkey." You just got possessed or something. I did not. Ask me again. Do you eat traditional Thanksgiving food? Not turkey. I do gotta say, don't I? Turkey? What is that? Not turkey. It's my tongue. It's a fat ass tongue, though. I'm starting to have trouble with my teeth now. Oh fuck! I'm starting to have trouble with my teeth now!

It used to just be S, and then it went from S to S-A-S-C-H. Now it's S-C-H-T. Starting a podcast. Three more years. You're not going to be able to say shit. You're going to start signing on this whole. How do you start a podcast and not be able to talk? Yeah. Like, that's an insane job resume. Okay. Well, kind of. Not turkey. What? Turkey. Turkey. Turkey. Turkey.

I am watching your tongue expand. I know. That is sick work. Wait, you say turkey. You say it. Turkey. Turkey. You went... Do it again. Turkey. Turkey. There you go. Turkey. Now say it in a full sentence like I'm asking you. Do you eat regular traditional Thanksgiving food? Not turkey. Turkey.

I said, "Yeah, well, not 30." I said it like that? Dude, that was weird. That's like two weeks in a row you had like a small stroke, like, in the middle of your- I've been having back of the head pain. You have said that. Were you just like drawing a bow and arrow? No, I got a long neck. Relax, Legolas. I have a long neck. And in high school people would- Oh my- NO! In high school people would come up to me with tape measures and put it up by my neck. They'd be like, "Eight inches today?" It was a rough time. What? The picture on the plane. Oh.

That is a cursed image. Oh my God, look at his neck. Dude, okay, I'm not going to lie. Do it again. No, it hurts. No, do it one more time. One more time. If y'all look, it looks like his neck goes all the way down to his hip complex. It's just like if you took your shirt off, his head and just a neck. What's the longest you've worn the same pair of underwear? Honestly, and you've had a camping trip or two? With zero physical activity, I'd say no longer than two days.

You're a gross human being. What's your answer? You know. Matter of fact, in my head, I'm going to pick what I think you're going to say. I've done it at your house recently. We went to an event and I was wearing the same drawers as four days ago.

But I didn't poop in them. Like, I didn't fart. And that's really my... That's a damn lie. No, no, no, no, no. I didn't. I didn't. Not that four-day stretch. I didn't fart in those. Peyton Harden past 10.30 p.m. is a shitbox. Your ass starts beatboxing, dog. P.M. Peyton Harden is a sick bastard. No, no, listen. It's like we leave the room and you sneak a shot glass of milk, you little lactose freak. Dude, when there's no sunlight, your ass is beatbox professional. You sit there...

It's like the beach in Normandy. No, but I know I'm going to have to keep these panties on for a while. I put them under the butt cheeks and I fart every time. If I know I'm going to have to keep these on for a couple days, you know what I mean? If these are my travel draws. Three things. And if there's no PPD. I've got to get a couple extra shakes in there. Borderline might put on a list how much I'm shaking in that restroom. Borderline players.

Three things one don't ever put your hands up like your Emperor Palpatine of me ever again. You said Do it okay? That's one two don't ever winking my wife while you're talking about taking your drawers off in three if you are inside my house wearing the same pair of panties for 96 hours straight knowing that your sphincter is a professional beatboxer past 10:00 p.m. And you just said you pants yourself to fart yeah, and

That means my house is now cursed. It is not safe. But you cannot talk. You go to the gym at 8 a.m., you sweat your ass off, and you won't take that shit off until 11 p.m. That is a damn lie. You smell like freshly cut grass after it rains. That is a damn lie. You smell like a Labrador Retriever after it just did a trick.

You smell like six-year-olds that just played in Play-Doh. You smell like Legoland. You smell like a trampoline park, you nasty freak. You smell like a bowling alley shoe. Okay. I got too worked up. At least I'm doing something to elicit the stench. Bathe!

You sit on a couch and you smell like sand volleyball. You sit there and you smell like crabs. Not the animal, the disease. You don't do anything and you smell equally as bad. You smell like a hospital bed. No, no, no, no. You want to start this? You smell like a pediatrician office. You smell like comforters that are used for moving and moving alone. That's what you smell like. You smell like U-Haul beds. That's what you smell like. You smell like the washing machine in a locker room. Dude.

That's bad. You smell like gravel. That's what you smell like. You smell like absolute gravel. You smell like... Okay. Live, death, no. All that's out. My God. It's going to be muted. I'm keeping it, though. Holy shit. Yeah. Okay. So you can try and get on me, but you're weirder than me, you stink worse than me, and you don't bathe. Okay. Okay.

You smell like band camp. That's what you smell like. You smell like band camp. I heard all those stories. Oh my God. Band kids are, yeah, they're nasty. These are dirty. You smell, you smell like the cafeteria when it was pizza day at 4.15 PM when you're getting let out of school and you can still smell it. That's what you smell like. Okay. You smell like a trash can after breakfast in the cafeteria filled with Bosco sticks. That's what you smell like.

You smell like the kid that woke up late on the star exam and forgot his TI-84. You know he's sweating. You know he's anxious. You smell like a porta potty at a music festival. You smell like- You know that's a bad- You gotta take that out, but that's- Oh my god. I'm keeping it, I'm muting it. Oh my god, that's bad. You smell like a kid that heats up broccoli in a microwave. That's what you smell like. That's what you smell like. You sick, no sanctity bitch. You smell like DeMarcus wears shoulder pads. Oh.

You smell like Ezekiel Elliott's luggage after he came back from Cabo. That's what you smell like. Like weed and women? Yeah, weed, women, and a little bit of sweat. A lot of food, too. You smell like handball on a cold November night. You smell like your dog. You look like your dog. Your dog has bad hips. You have bad hips. Your dog has a bad brain. You have a bad brain. You got the same face as your dog.

You love my dog, so you love me. No, I love your dog because it's an animal and it can't talk back. No, you love me. You love me. You love me. No, I'm starting to lose it. Why? That's so rude. So much spit. So many different layers of spit. Because now I'm switching roles. Be careful. I'm tired of being on the defensive. Then be on the offensive. That's what I am doing. That's what I've been doing. Strike me. Put me down. Put the fear of God in your eyes and strike me now.

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To the rest of the episode.

I've witnessed Cam threaten to make a TikTok against a restaurant. He acts like he's Keith Lee. I did not do that. Shout out to Keith Lee. I love you, man. Keith Lee was sick. This is what Cam did, right? So I'm moving, right? I'm moving close to Cam. Me and Clem and Liv are going to... Who's Clem? You smell like Clem.

You and Liv, we're gonna all live next to each other. We are. I'm super excited. And so... You see how I'm excited and he's not? Alright. Well, I was. And so I was like, oh my god, Cam, we can finally go to the gym together. Cause he's, you know... Oh my god, you're lying. He wants me to go to the gym. She... You're a terrorist. Shut up. You're a terrorist, dog. You're hijacking. I'm so sorry. Go. Give me my fucking watch.

It's so wet in your band. Your band is wet. Sniff that finger, it will not be good. No, it smells like Play-Doh. Like, dead ass smells like... Salty like it, too. Anyway, so, listen here. Put some limone on! This is what we're... This is what I... So, I told Cam, right? I was like, we can start working out together. I thought I was going to make my best friend's day. I thought he was going to be like, oh my god, Play-Doh. Come here, let me grab them cheeks. So, that's what I thought.

I farted. Excuse me. Sorry. I thought he was going to be excited that he gets to hang out with me, go to the gym with me, hopefully help me get better, right? Cam is famous now. So he goes to a gym with a bunch of famous people that I don't go to. No, I don't.

He always tells me, I went to the gym today. This guy's 2 million followers. We're talking about this brand deal, this, that, and the other. We're talking business. I'm like, oh, well, thanks, Cam. Cool, cool. And one time I was trying to hang out with him, and I was like, Cam, let's hang out tonight. He goes, oh, I'm going to dinner with my gym friends. I was waiting for like a comma. You want to come? Oh!

You want to come? Never happened. Stop being a terrorist. Oh. So I was like, oh, damn, he's switching up. He's getting too famous for me. And so I told Cam, I was like, Cam, we're moving close to each other. We can finally start working out together. He goes, oh, yeah, well, well, P, you know, I kind of, I'm in a groove with these guys at the gym. Like, you know, the famous influencer gym people. I go, oh, cool. And he goes, yeah. He goes, so I'm trying to get on their level. And, uh,

I know you're trying to get on mine, so I don't think it would be right if we all work out together because it would just be too much of a drop-off when you come. Cam's embarrassed to be around me and his famous friends. Sorry I don't have the clout that your friends have and all these muscle mass mommies around. I can't. All right? I'm trying my best.

and i can get invited to your korea barbecue dinner with all your famous influencer people because you have to have a certain amount of followers to go i am i am sweating with cringe right now i'm sweating with pain you were okay we're just gonna break up changed up cam changed up cam changed up i want that to be chanted at the la show when we walk out cam changed up cam changed up cam changed up and everybody go like this not funny

Thank you, Lin. Thank you. Lin's a part of the problem too! Okay, let's- 'Cause she has all these famous fitness girl influencer friends! Lin has no friends! No, not that, that like- I was trying to defend you but it came out wrong. I'm so sorry. You have me, you're the only friend you need. God, you're long! You're taking up this whole couch. No, don't get on Bumble for friends, babe. You don't need that. You're a great woman. You're a catch. My friend that's all our friends is moving down here. That's your friend. Hello!

She's excited. Alright, anyway. Alright, are you done lying? I'm not lying. Okay. Tell me you didn't say that in your home, in your kitchen, whenever I try to play 2K. We're gonna break this shit down. First off, break it down, break it down. Shake that money maker like somebody about to pay ya. Don't worry about them haters, keep your nose up in the air. You know I got it if you wanna come get it. Stand next to this money like, hey, hey, hey. Put some little money- Damn! Hello. Alright. Alright.

I'm very sweaty now. We're going to break this down scene by scene. First scene, he says that he invited himself to lift with me. I did. And I now said I have famous friends that are better than you that I'm trying to work with. Yes. Okay. One, I am lifting Dolo. No, you're not! Olivia. No, you're not. There's a TikTok with you on it and all the comments were like, is that Cam from the podcast? I spotted Romeo. He's a great guy. Lifted with the boys. Hey, Romeo.

No, we love Romeo. He's my friend. We love Romeo. Romeo said he wants to chill with us. Romeo ain't said shit to me. He doesn't have your information. Because you're sitting butt-ass naked in a Snuggie watching able behind-the-scenes documentaries at 3 p.m. That's what you're doing. And your ass is sitting there. Okay? You sick bastard. Here we go. Oh, ooh, I got a little...

How long is this podcast? Alright. First things first. I lift Dolo and when I don't lift Dolo I lift with two new gym buddies. That are famous. Neither of them are. They're not famous. Neither of them are. Okay. Swear to God they're not. Okay. Go. I swear to God they're not. Go. So that's the first thing. Second thing. I have been demanding his gym presence before he found his famous friends for two

Before he found his famous friends. Two years. Before he found his famous friends. Two years. Before he found your famous friends. So if you believe this story at all, you're a sick loser. Ooh, my name's K, my famous friends, and I have more famous friends than Peyton has. Next thing, Peyton's entire following completely dwarfs all of ours combined. So... Nah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, light doesn't feel so good when it hits the sensitive spots. What? I have SPF 1. I've never worn sunscreen in my life. So... You know, but I... What? What?

This is a frisky episode. It's fucking dangerous. The ISOs get leaked. We're done.

All right. That's the first thing. Second thing. Korean barbecue. You were invited. No, I wasn't. Olivia. No. Rough estimate. Maybe 11 times. That's not an invite. If I'm not in the initial plans, I'm not invited. The person who made the initial plans. Doesn't know me. Because I'm not famous enough for him. He did. You, Romeo. It's not Romeo. It's not Romeo. Gage made the plans. Gage invited you. You said no because you said I'm anxious and weird around people I don't know.

Because they didn't invite me. He doesn't have your contact information. Exactly, because I'm not famous enough. He has mine. Because you're famous. I have the messages. Because you invited me because I was there on a phone call. And I got caught in the stray. And you were like, oh, I have to invite this lonely ass cat that's following me to my doorstep. How long is this podcast going to last before I leave you? You are going to leave me. I'll never leave you. You would leave me.

Because... You would leave me. Because you string me along to make yourself feel better because your eye is twitching. Your eye is twitching. Your face looks round. I don't have much time left. Anyway, I don't know if y'all are going to get to see it because, well, you'll get to see it. Uncle P has a new place. You're never going to know where it is. No, never. You're never in a million years going to know the location. I think whenever it's set up, we're going to do a house tour. We are. It's going to be a double vlog of our new place. And basically, we're moving in next...

Next week and he's moving in in two weeks when we all get set up one night patreon You'll see a nice little a little tool of maybe both. Maybe we throw a little kick back little housewarming get together You know, are you excited about your new place? Cam doesn't like me because I'm weird. That is not it at all You're a weird sack of bones. There's no doubt about it. But no, oh my god No, Peyton does some weird shit the other night in the car. Okay I'm gonna ask you right now. I'm about to confront you the other night in the car. We're driving. We're going to a gas station. Oh

My phone's connected through Bluetooth in my car. My music's supposed to play. He's like, my phone's dead. Can I plug it in? Plugs it in. I'm driving. We're listening to whatever the hell is probably some hard rap if it's my phone. All of a sudden, I hear like an insect. What was that?

It was like, you know what I'm talking about. It was, every time he opened an app or something, it randomly, Apple CarPlay connected to his phone. It was like, I was like, what the? I literally looked around. I thought someone was in my car. And then it would go back to my phone. Two minutes later, it was like, what the hell was that? You weren't supposed to. I wasn't. What? It was crickets. It was like insects, dog. It was crickets? It's horrible.

Whose fault is it? Shoddy craftsmanship. Shoddy cra- no no no! I don't give a damn if my car was connected to yours. Why is there crickets on your phone? Why is there insect bugs life? You had a re- oh my god, you had a live action roleplay of bugs life on your phone. What were you listening- what are you searched to find that? Please! This kid's playing bugs in my car, like what are you doing? I've been having a thing.

Where I've been really interested in like the language of the crickets. Crickets! You were... I was listening. I was watching because it wasn't supposed to play on your car. It's your car's fault. I watched... Oh my God. A two hour long cricket sound compilation video on YouTube because I was interested in like the dialect. Interested in the depth. What are you going to try to be their ruler? Take over the land of crickets? That was personal. Personal my...

You weren't supposed to hear that. No one's ever supposed to, that's not even supposed to be a thing. What did you, if that was on Apple Music, I swear to God I'm taking your phone away. It's on YouTube. It was a two hour compilation. And it plays like the different cricket sounds all the way through because it's a very interesting, like how? That never ran through your brain one day. It's like, how are they talking? How is that much power coming out of their throat? If I had a gun to my head, I can't even draw a cricket, let alone know their dialect.

Why are you interested on crickets? I did your car switch to my phone. That's not... That's inappropriate. That is... It wasn't supposed to happen. No, the inappropriate thing is this freak... Listen, why... It's crickets. There's nothing you say that can defend your honor in this conversation. No, I'm not waiting. I'm talking... We're literally driving down. It's like... It's like, get money. Get money. I was like, what the...

I got a bug infestation in my car. You weren't supposed to hear. That was supposed to be something that's just my personal time. It was just a thought. No, that's the thing. Honest to God, that's the thing with you. Everyone thinks you have this great playlist. You have good tunes. No one ever knows what's coming out of your phone. Ever. Why? Ever. 2012 2 Chainz, Luke Bryan, Snow Allegra, fucking Cricket Compilator. You are a creep, bro. No one knows what's coming out of your phone.

Unreleased Gunna, Morgan Wallen. It's just not... No one knows what's coming out of your phone. It's just supposed to be behind closed doors. That was a personal thing that I just wanted to figure out. Like, you... I'm just... I'm just interested. You have, like, 94 freestyle, like, basement Tupac shit. Like, no one knows... Bro, but you're... Okay. You've never, like, listened to Crickets Through the Wall? No.

I'm a human being! I don't listen, I don't give a shit about a cricket! I guess that's what we're doing. Oh, that's, you're damn right, there's no guessing about it, cricket boy. No, that's an interesting video, you should go listen to it. Honestly, because it's so interesting. Like, the crickets are powerful throats. It's a, okay, it's 120 minutes of crickets communicating. No, they're not talking to each other, it just shows the different languages. Oh my god, were you researching?

Yes or no, if you watch enough, do you think you can communicate to crickets? Oh my god, you're a freak. I could try. If I held the phone up, there's not really a pattern I've figured out yet. If you held the phone, what are you going to take a shoelace and put them on a collar? You're going to get a pet cricket? I've tried to put a pigeon on a leash before. You don't deserve happiness. You don't deserve things that are holy. You listen to crickets, dog. Once. Crickets! It was two hours.

And it was just, how is it not stopping? Do you know how long two hours is? Was it even a video? No, it was like a still image of a cricket and it was just playing the different sounds for two hours. They didn't have ads. It was really easy listen. It was an easy listen. Why do you do that on the podcast? Why do you do that in your real life? Because it was just personal. Honestly, that's something that I just wanted to figure out in a moment and it just stayed too long. A moment? Two hours is a hell of a long moment. Two hours goes by fast in my life.

I have no one to talk to. Oh my god, that's why you want to get a joke. Oh my god, you have crickets at your place. A couple. A cricket's never popped out of your shower. No. Oh. Put some limon on it. You've never had a cricket pop out your sink before? No. And you've never heard that motherfucker talk? You've never had a cricket sink? You live with that guy from Men in Black, Edgar, or whatever his name was. Never seen that. Never seen that.

Just never interested me. You've never seen Men in Black? No. Will Smith? Never seen him. I'm aware. You've never seen Men in Black? No. Oh, speaking of animals, what animal species on the earth would you want to control? I need to block every subscription you have to anything to do with animals. I swear to God. I need to put parental controls on your streaming services. Noah Phan DM'd me that question. I really liked it. Say it again? What animal species on this earth would you control if you could control any animal species? Mine's a bald eagle.

What? Represents freedom. They're fascinating creatures. They're so... It's the biggest bird I've ever seen. Oh my god, they are strangely big. Yeah, what's yours? If that's a bad answer, what's yours? That's not a bad answer, it's just unique. Like, you're just this... You're this gem we need to protect. What's yours, gorillas? Be careful. No, no, be careful.

A good quality answer, if I have five seconds to think, I am going to either take the ape kingdom or, stop it, stop it, or something underwater. See, that's a bad answer. Quick travel, there's millions of them. See, that's why you're dumb. You don't think. Maybe beluga whales. See, that's the thing. You don't think.

A million beluga whales versus a million hawks? What'd you pick? Bald eagles. Bald eagles. The ones that have no hair. Okay, they have no hair. Your birds don't even have a faux hawk. And my beluga whales are enormous. Your beluga whale's got a thing right here. It's got a computer right here. It's got a little squishy spot. It's got a Dell laptop right here. Maybe killer whales. No, just have one answer. You're thinking too much. One answer, go. Ape kingdom. Okay, that's the thing. I win. No shot. Because I've invented teleportation.

You're going to have six of your bald eagles pick you up and fly you. Danny, Lorenzo, come down. I'm going to Nebraska by tomorrow. I'm air traveling. Okay. And? Kill. Kill. Yeah, I could take out anybody, any species. Aerial attacks are the most dangerous. You're not beating my gorillas. Aerial attacks beat any land attack. Okay, they're not shooting missiles, dumbass. They've got to come down to the land to do anything. Yeah, sir. What are your bald eagles going to pick up bricks and drop them? A bird's never made you dizzy.

What? Do you ever try to follow a bird and it's irregular flight patterns? That shit, he can throw you for a loop. I'm going to put like the teacup ride at Disney. That shit. Okay, you're going to say Danny Lorenzo and what was the last one? Kyle, what was his name? And you're going to fly to Nebraska like a weird freak. I'm going to say Congo, Mache, Tarmac, come down and fight for me. And then I have apes. Four bald eagles make up the size of an ape.

Exactly. And I can control all bald eagles? I can control all apes. You just said four of yours makes one of mine. I could literally say... So if we both brought four to battle, you're outnumbered significantly. I could bring all of them. What do you think I'm going to do with the apes? Bring a quarter of them? Cam, Ariel, it's back. A million bald eagles versus a million apes. Who wins? A million bald eagles. Are you nuts? Honestly, deadass, are you nuts? You cannot be serious. A million bald eagles. Bald eagles are the size of this. Dragon.

An ape's the size of this! Okay, imagine him flying with claws, dog! He has to come down. Watch this, watch this. You're an ape. Be an ape. Okay. I'm a bald eagle, right? Uh-huh. Uh-huh? I won. See? Big, look, big and stupid...

Kind of big and flies with smart precision skills with its talent. Okay, do it again. Second come. No, you don't get a second try, man. Then you didn't win, dumbass. You're not going to make one swoop and murder all my monkeys. It's not how that works. Do it again. Go for your second round. Go for it! Okay. You're dead. You're dead. You're dead.

Is it bad that I'm now? Okay. That was one-on-one. Imagine a million of them. Okay. Have you ever seen a bald eagle in person? Deadass. Deadass, have you ever seen a bald eagle in person? No. They're massive creatures. You haven't. Yes, I have. Where were you at? We're the Hendrickson Hawks. That's why they called that because there's eagles everywhere. The Hendrickson Hawks.

My high school's mascot was a hawk! Mine was a wolf! Yeah, y'all have a stuffed wolf in your lobby. PETA, somebody come get them. Welcome to Texas. No, I'm saying, honestly, a million, you think a million apes could beat a million eagles? Dog. Okay, genuinely. I'm deadass, I'm not even making a joke. Okay, genuinely. Yes, aerial attacks, what's the best way to win war?

When you have missiles, yeah, it's different! A foot missile, dumbass! Your bird has to come to my level to attempt to attack me. Yes, and you can only stay on the ground. I can go ground, air, ground, air, middle ground. Okay, who is it? Front, back. I can carry so much distance. What are you doing in middle ground? What are you doing in the middle of the air? We have a strategy!

The only way you can touch is to come to my level. No, I can go above you. What are you going to do? Is your Eagles picking up cinder blocks? Have you seen a bald Eagle's foot, dog? Yes, big talent, sharp. Right in your face. When your muffin is screwed up, you're done. We don't even have to kill you on the heart. We go for your face. You got one in the back, right? Monkey boy's trying to...

Monkey's trying to figure out what's going on in the back region, right? In the rearview mirror. They're looking back in the rearview mirror. All you know, fucking Tiffany is coming like this right here. I've named her. Coming right here, taking your eyeballs out. Monkey done. Do that a million times, dog. Okay, when Tiffany's coming from the front, Kuban is jumping off the tree, snagging Tiffany. Who owns the tree, dumbass? The gorillas! Who spends more time in the tree? Gorillas! Where do the eagles live? You know nothing!

Where do the eagles live? You think bald eagles live on a red oak? They live in a jungle? Where do they lay their head? Mountains. Where do they lay their head to sleep? Mountains. Mountains don't have trees? Exactly. We're in the mountains. We're picking at your whole game plan. We know your floor plan. We know where your bathroom is. We know you have two and a half baths. Here's my thing. If your talents aren't shooting nine millimeters out of them,

You have to come to my level. We have beaks too, dumbass. You have to swarm down. A million, bro? We'll fuzz you with our feathers, dog. You're disoriented. That's like a smoke bomb. Don't pop in smoke. Okay, let's take it on a different level. Let's make you think outside the box. You, Peyton Harden, do you feel more safe right here with five bald eagles or with five gorillas protecting your life? Five. Five.

That's not what I asked. Five what, jackass? Five bald eagles or five gorillas? That's not the question. Oh, but it's interesting. That's like saying one gorilla versus one bald eagle. Who wins? It's a group. We're strong as a team sport, dumbass. A million of them are in the air and we're going to kick kill. We're going to get wins. So who wins one-on-one, gorilla versus bald eagle?

What kind of gorilla is it? Gorilla. Who wins 10 on 10? What kind? Who wins 10 on 10? Bald Eagle. Gorilla. Bald Eagle. You can give me any number. If you outnumber me, it's different. No. If it's a million versus a million, my gorillas, they are a gorilla. No, you're not thinking, bro. You're not thinking, bro. Would you rather get attacked from here or right here? Would you rather get attacked from on top or right in front of you? I would much rather, as a human being. You've never been human. Yes, you've never. I would much rather get attacked by a bald eagle.

That bald eagle might... No, I didn't ask you that! You just said, would you rather get attacked from here or here? No, I didn't say by what creature, dumbass. I just said, would you rather get attacked from anything? Straight on or from the top or from there? It completely depends on what I'm getting attacked by. No, it doesn't. You can't see in the sky, bro. The sun's bright. Would you rather get...

Would you rather get attacked by an ape or a bald eagle? Answer me right now. I don't want to hear shit else you have to say. You, Peyton Harden, standing here like this in the studio. I can hide from an ape. You can't hide from the air. Dude, you said that in the mall. You can't hide from an ape. Yes, you can. It's big as shit. And they're dumb. Throw that John and Nanner in an iPhone. It's done for the day. That mofo started doing Sudoku on your phone. He's going to start top batting. I can train him to go to the circus. You can't train foul. You would rather get attacked by an...

You don't know. That's because you've never been in a life or death circumstance in your life. You've never been in anything. What life or death have you been in? Cricket boy. Making out of bed. That's sad and deep. That cuts too deep. A bald eagle at a bald eagle. I'm going to be honest. Last thing. At absolute worst, absolute worst case scenario, bald eagle comes down.

Gashes both of my eyes out. I'm blind. They're picking at me. I'm bleeding. That's terrible. I fall to the fetal position. And you're dead. I fall to the fetal position. You're dead. I can't see anything. Do you know what a gorilla would do?

A gorilla would grab me by my throat. And that's your fault for letting it get close to you. You have no survival skills. Nancy Classified 101, dog. Okay, one, you can't wrestle. Two, you can't run. You don't know me. One, you can't wrestle. Two, you can't run. Three, you're not nimble. You die to a gorilla. There's no doubt about it. You can't fly.

Guess what? You're in a plane, dog. You're on Southwest Airlines. You got two free bags. You think your life is good. You don't have assigned seats. You just got lucky. You got on boarding group A. Little do you know, Paul Deagle Terry's on there, too. He got up there at Gorilla King. You know why? Paul Deagle's already up there. That's home, bud. That atmosphere. He spent Thanksgiving turkey up there. He spent Thanksgiving with the family up there. And he sees, that's a massive head on Southwest right there. Oh, that's Cam? Cam?

Mine, dog. Anywhere you go. Anywhere on the earth, that bald eagle can go. Anywhere on earth, that gorilla can't go. Okay. Here we go. Guess who just lost? You, Southwest boy. Okay, say that Southwest 0410 flight lands, right? You're leaving the tunnel. Lands on the tar, Michael. You walk out. You grab your two checked bags. You go. Not checked.

Carry-ons you go right if you're in that tunnel Would you rather be one-on-one in that tunnel against a bald eagle or an ape? Do you see how oddly specific you have to be to win? I'm saying you just said a fucking bald eagles eating a turkey dinner in the middle of the sky on a Southwest airline trying to kill me and I'm the specific one you sick bitch Just cuz you don't listen to the full story. You don't read between the lines. You just gave me a two chapter book about I'm getting chased down by

In the holiday times in November by a bald eagle whose name's Terry. He snuck on a Southwest flight and he's coming to kill me. He's lethal. I'm saying. And I'm the specific one. Because I'm saying the broad point of that story was it doesn't matter if you're up here, right here, or under here. That bald eagle can go. I got to be on earth. I just got to be. I got to have two feet planted for the gorilla to even be a thought.

You could be anywhere. 99.9% of your life, your two fucking feet are planted on the ground. The only time you're in sky is in a plane. And a bald eagle's not getting in that plane. I'm in my apartment, right? A gorilla has a better chance. I'm in my apartment, right? I'm in my apartment. I'm in my apartment, right? Lock the door. Ape, done. Bald eagle, done.

And your patio door doesn't work. You've been trying to get it fixed since January. It doesn't work. You can't go on your patio. You're safe. You're fit. You're fine. A gorilla could break that door down. A bald eagle's gonna go on that glass. I know. You gotta get fresh air or you'll die. That's not true, because if that's the case, you would have been dead years ago. Years ago. How many patios does your new home have? It has one. Yours has two. That's cool. Huh, Big Bang Hank?

Gorilla mauls you every time. Gorilla clears. Dude, you have a thing with gorillas? You bring up gorillas every other episode. I think you want to get me caught. I am sweating and we just spoke about that for 15 minutes. Because you are dumb and stupid and... Bro. I can't stay. That's a case that we have to figure out. But I want to figure out some more cases. Oh. I think it's time to help some people with the people's favorite love doctor in the world. I think it's time to put some limonade on it.

Dr. P Squire welcome Lord touch me. You're right. Don't touch me. I'm here to put some

Put some lemon on it. Dr. P, we have tons of submissions. If you want your story, your tragedy, your trauma, whatever it might be, to be on Dr. P, hit up in the Discord channel. Send us DMs on any social media. Not turkey. Yeah, well, kinda. Not turkey. Fucking weirdo. Anyway. Sorry. No, you're not. This is my one time to shine as a secretary. Please, Sire. Please. I want to say something to them. Fuck off.

Y'all don't just have to say stories where y'all are wrong. I want to see some of y'all's toxic stories. I want to see what y'all are doing that's nasty out here in the streets. But go ahead, Secretary.

Am I allowed? Yes. Okay, thank you, Sire. Basically, I was saying if you want your chance to be premiered here, live on the podcast, you just gotta send your stuff in. I'll randomly pick one every week. If I don't pick you, don't take it personally. I'll just click on one and read it. You're not toxic enough. Here we go. Hey, Dr. P. Hello. I am currently talking to this dude who I've been talking with since March of this year. Whew.

Hell yeah, he is. Hell yeah! Excuse me?

He has said that he's not talking to his ex anymore and he treats me as if I'm his girlfriend. But then he does this and says he doesn't know what he wants or how to feel. Do you think I'm being strung along or could this be worth staying around? The hips are moving. The hips are moving. The pelvis is greased. Dr. P is ready. The Kegel exercises are activated. You got one more time to say I'm Kegel. I'm so sorry. It's just a buzzword. This is what I got to say. Let's hear it, Sonia. He's doing everything right.

He's doing everything right. I'm not going to lie to you. That's not toxic. Just because I'm honest. Let's hear him out, America. Look, Dr. P is honest, brutally honest with you. Okay. That's why you come to the best live, doctor. He's not going to sugarcoat nothing. He's not going to put sugar on that turkey. He's not going to sugar your tits. He's going to keep it real. Hello. Don't know about that one. Goodbye. Warm coffee. Put some limonade. This is the thing. Just because you live in fairyland.

and your imaginations going to what could be you like them cool you can't blame him he's told you i love this girl he's he loves that girl well he loves yeah everybody we don't have that in factual proof i don't know everybody loves her well everybody's got that one and that's his one and he's gonna pick her over you every time i'm just saying it's dr p it's not payton

He is. He's going to pick. He loves her. Continue sawing. He loves her. Yeah. He's having fun canoodles with you. Cool. But he's told you to your face. Hey, I love this girl. I love her more than I love you. You're disgusting, secretary. Yeah, that's so much sweat. I'm sorry. He is going to pick her 100 times out of 100. Let me be nice. 99. He is going to pick her 99 times out of 100.

He likes y'all's intimate moments. He thinks you're cool. He likes hanging out with you. He likes texting you. You're probably a cool girl, right? You are. You're doing nothing wrong. You're being a cool girl and you're good in intimate moments. He enjoys that. He just loves his ex. You're going to have to come to the decision yourself. Listen, you're going to have to come to this decision yourself, right? Am I okay with being second? It's a harsh truth. We've all had to do it. Dr. P has had to do it.

You gotta be okay with being second with some people. Secretary hasn't. But look, you have been. You're just too dumb to realize. Oh, fuck. You're probably like third or fourth. Oh, God. This is what has to happen, right? You have to want better for yourself. You have to want better for yourself. I agree. You can say, I like this guy. I like talking to him. But I'm gonna be second in his life. And if that's what you want to settle for in life, nothing wrong with it. Y'all can have a happy second place marriage. Pfft.

Or you can go and find somebody else who's going to make the effort towards you. Because I can assure you something. There's a guy out there that's going through the same thing, but with you on the other end. You're the ex. You're the ex that he'll always come back to. But you're like, eh, I kind of want this toxic guy that's making me in and out, in and out type of thing. That's what you want.

You got to want better for yourself, queen. So the one time that she reached out, checked in on him, they end up hooking up. That was his one out of the hundred. No, no, he's going to hook up. He's going to text you whenever he doesn't want to text his ex. He's going to hook up with you whenever you let him. You have the power in your hands. You're a strong, smart, funny, beautiful woman. What's her name? Couldn't tell you. You have to grab your cojones. She doesn't have them. You don't know. You have to grab your cojones.

And you got to be like, I want better for myself. I want to find me someone who puts me first, who loves me the way I deserve to be loved. And he's, that's what you deserve. Don't you clap when I'm clapping. Oh, all right. Or be second fiddle. Ain't nothing wrong with being second. I'm a great rebound. I'm a great second fiddle. Anybody, not me, Peyton.

Peyton is a great second fiddle. Oh, God. He is. I've talked to him. He came to Dr. P a lot. Oh, God. He's leading the league in rebounds. He's a great rebound. Man knows how to box out. Great box out game. He clears the boards. He can read the rim. Oh, my God. He's not in there for scoring. He's not in there for a long time. He is a utility player. He will go dive for 50-50 balls, and he will get every rebound. What a hell of a player. It's fun to be around. Coach's dream. Not toxic. And that's okay.

And that's okay if that's what you want. If that's the role you were put on this earth for, that's what Peyton is here for. God damn it. After the breakups. That was, uh... Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P!

Man, that was an interesting one. It's a fact, though. That was an interesting one. Dr. P knows what he's talking about. I am a rebound. That's what I've learned about myself, man. I'm sorry, folks. I can't look for long relationships. Anybody just wants me after their man does them wrong because I'm nice and funny. And good. Yeah. You have what? Good friends. Oh. And they want to be around my friends because they're like, oh, my God, my ex's friends are so toxic and I hated my ex and you're so nice and funny, but I'm not going to love you for a long time.

I'm until I get over him and I'm gonna go find someone else and go get married. Every girl gets married after they leave me. Like that's a crazy part. Think about crazy statistic about every girl. They like I've talked to in the past, like two years. Right. They just got off of a breakup. They come to me and they leave me and they don't get a long term relationship. I am miserable. We'll work on it, buddy. But do you, um,

I heard something, but I think it's only right to share it on people's favorite segment. You know what that is? Pop culture, pay and it can. Pop culture, pay and it can. Bye!

Pop culture. What I heard is that LeBron is still God. So, yeah. Honestly, you might be the worst at pop culture. They're going to dead the pop culture segment because of you. Let me get on my high horse. Matter of fact, two things. Scary Hours 3 came out. Fantastic tunes. And LeBron's still the GOAT. So, what do you want to hear about? I think for these segments, we're just going to have you not talk.

We're going to have you with a laptop. I'm kidding. Screw LeBron, but he is fantastic and he's amazing. He's doing it at year 21. No one's ever seen it before. It'll never happen again. Anyway. What's up, my daddy? Coke? No, it's disgusting. It looks flat and it started to turn purple. Anyway. Flat. No. You have no clue. Flaccid, yes. Flat. I'm doing it. I'm kidding. Scary Hours 3, though. So Peyton has an interesting take on this. He thinks all six of those songs were recorded post-album release. Yes. He believes that Drake heard the criticism.

and said, let me put y'all back in your place real quick. If you haven't listened to the six tracks that have been put on the deluxe edition of For All the Dogs, it's basically six tracks of flames. Absolute flamethrowers, torches, fires, matches, whatever you want to say. Let's break it down track by track, right? We got Red Button, Stories About My Brother, The Shoe Fits, Evil Ways featuring J. Cole, and You Broke My Heart. Now, I know Red Button was recorded after. I know that. Stories About My Brother...

Recorded after. That's a fantastic one too. The Shoe Fits. Phenomenal. Fantastic song. I don't. That could have been before. Not sure. That's a fantastic song. Evil Ways. Could have been before. Featuring J. Cole. And You Broke My Heart. Could have been before. You're missing one. No. I just read six. You said five. Red Button. Stories About My Brother. The Shoe Fits. Wicked Ways. Whatever it's called. See. Wickman. That's the one you left out. You said you went straight to Evil Ways. You didn't say Wickman. Oh yeah. I don't have Wickman on here. Okay. Yeah.

Uh, Wickman's good too. Wickman's great. All of them are good. Yeah. Evil ways though. Good God. Yeah. That is your favorite song on it. Out of those six, that, and then, uh, that, and then,

Probably stories about my brother and then Shoe Fit. Okay. You broke my bro. The last one's fire too. You broke my heart. He said, fuck my ass. Yeah. That's going to go crazy in clubs. It's going to go crazy at the concert. In a club that's going to go nutty. I like... He says it for like 20 bars. Yeah. Like 20 lines. Oh my God. And then in the back in the ad, he's like saying sentences about her. It's fire. It's so good. This is the thing with me and music. I like music that I feel like I could...

Yeah. Like when he talks, when he gets on his braggadocio, that's why I like the shoe fits because I, each one of these things where he's getting on a girl or he's talking about guys, I know a girl or a guy that I could direct those bars at. So I'm like, that's why I like that song. There's several guys in that last verse that I'm like, Oh boy. That's why I posted on my story. Cause I was like, I know y'all be watching them stories. Uh, anyway, Jesus Christ. Uh, and, um,

Red Button is a great way to start it because he's just like, oh, boy. But him and J. Cole back and forth is always a great time. Yeah, that was fantastic. Evil Way is fantastic. The last song is just like a different vibe from the first five. First five is like hard, like you said, braggadocious, mogul, Drake. It's just like, oh, music to my ears.

That's Drake, though. Drake is so good. He'll give you five barred, and then he's like, I got to get emotional. Dude, he is so good. He's the greatest of all time. He is so damn good. He's the greatest of all time. It's kind of crazy, bro. He can't... He just...

It's a cliche, and everyone says it. He literally doesn't miss, though. The last miss song that I hate that Drake put out was Ratchet Happy Birthday. Do you know how long ago that was? 26, 17, 18? Bro, years. Yeah. Crazy. Everything he's dropped since then. I'm just like, I like it. Yeah. And even, I don't like Ratchet Happy Birthday either, but the people that it was made for...

Oh, they love it. Every day that song is used because it's every day somebody's birthday. Smart man. Even the sexy red song on For All The Dogs. I hate that song. I hate it too. But it's not for us. But it's not for us. But even if you just let it play, it's not the worst. I'd hate it. No, I really don't like it. Like a two out of ten. But it's not like I have to stab my ears with a pencil. It's not that bad. Ratchet Happy Birthday, I almost stabbed myself. It's my birthday. I was like...

Swipe delete. Swipe delete. Swipe delete. Yeah, yeah. Drake's unbelievable. His Lux is amazing. You haven't listened to it. Go listen to it now. And the longevity. Ever since I've been cohesively listening to music, Drake has been at the top. Yes. And he hasn't fallen off. I fell down like a rabbit hole on TikTok yesterday. It was like...

Like a four part little mini series. Each one was like two and a half minutes about Drake getting his house plans. Dude, it was sick. Dude, he went through, I didn't know he went through so many legal battles to get that, his mansion built. Yeah. Because like. It breaks every code. Breaks every code. I broke all the codes for zoning in my residential. Yeah. Yeah.

All of them. Yeah. Like, he broke all of them and they still got approved. Yeah. Every last code. Because he runs Canada. Bro, and he literally... Like, the fences on his house were, like, two times the allowed heights. And he said it's for security. He was like, I don't want people knowing where I sleep, eat, see any stuff. It's just pure brick. Yeah. Like, bro, it's... This is a... Oh, I don't know how to say this. The amount of people that I know that have been to Drake's house is actually crazy. And I've still never met them. They've still never... I know two you're talking about. I don't know who they are. Yeah, they... A lot of... Like, if you're in Canada...

I can't say too much. But yeah, I know a lot of people that have been to Drake's house and still have never met him. That's how crazy that house is and like the stuff that goes on. Is that the same house in the music video? Of, yeah. Of the Tootsie Slide? Tootsie Slide? Yeah. Dude, that video is so fun to watch. It's insane. The house is insane. It's crazy. It is absolutely just nuts. It doesn't make sense. Yeah. Shout out to Drake. Shout out Aubrey. Aubrey Graham, man. Straight from Degrassi. He's going back on tour. Jumbotron shit like I came from Degrassi. That's Rod Wave. Yeah. It was a Drake line.

He's going back on tour with J. Cole. With J. Cole. Last four shows don't have J. Cole. Still a Drake concert though. Yeah. He's going to all the smaller markets, which is kind of...

He's like paying homage. We canceled him on the first tour. Because he doesn't want to go there. Who wants to go there? He wants to go to OKC for two days. He wants to go to Paycom. We love you, Liv. That's the only artist. That's the last one on my bucket list that I need to see. I've seen The Weeknd. I've seen Eminem. I need to see Drake now. I've seen J. Cole. The Weeknd. The Weeknd concert was crazy. Can't wait until he goes back on tour. He's still on tour.

I don't believe that. I think it's just insane. Well, imagine doing our show every day since we went. No. Well, it's not every day. Once a week. I don't even think it's once a week. Bro.

Look at the dates. When it was busting going, yes. But when he went overseas, bro, it wasn't like... Okay, watch this. Yeah. All right. This is his European leg of the tour. After he left America, he went straight over to Europe. He went to everywhere in America. This was the dates for Europe. June 10th, June 14th, June 17th, June 20th, June 24th, June 26th, July 2nd, July 4th, July 7th.

August 6th, August 9th, August 12th, September 29th. I took a little break. October 4th, October 7th, October 10th, October 13th, October 15th. Yeah. But what I'm saying is from that... It's like three times a week. But the American tour was July 14th to November 27th of 22. So I'm saying he took from... Yeah, he took that break in between. December all the way to June. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. That's like a seven month... That's crazy. No, it's insane. But I'm saying... And then he went to Spain. He definitely had a fat break in between. He recorded in...

Did an album come out between that? No, Don FM already came out. That concert was unbelievable though. Yeah, shout out to all of them. I guess. In the extended episode, I'm going to be playing a lot of the extended for the Fraud of Dogs, Scary Hours 3. Oh, wow. Stop. I was going to crack it. I'll crack your back. Anyway. Put some limone! Put some limone!

That was everybody's favorite segment. Pop culture. Payton and Cam. Pop culture with Payton and Cam. Shake that money. Don't wink at me. It makes me flutter. That was episode 88. Get your dark socks and dogs at the same time. Get your dark sock dogs off of me.

Episode 88. We absolutely love y'all. Any information, any question you need to know. Who's going to win the 2024 election? Who's going to buy out Nike? The ticket's in the bio. Ticket's in the bio. Description. What's your favorite color? What's the best animal on earth? Los Angeles. Ticket's in the description. Any question to anything. Shut up, Siri. Any question you need to know is in the description below. Tickets. December 7th.

Regent Theater Los Angeles. We're not going to anywhere else in California. Stop asking. We keep seeing the questions. That's in a loving way. I'm telling you that because I love you. Because instead of asking, can you please come here? You just need to go there. We are going to LA December 7th, Regent Theater. We are going to see you there and there only, California.

Los Angeles. You might as well go to it. And then if you want to be a part of the chant whenever Cam comes out, Cam switched up. Cam switched up. Cam switched up. I can't wait to hear it. That's a sick chant. Hundreds of people chant it. Anyway, confusing the casuals and to get your good karma, this week's code is L-O-I. Lamone on it.

Hold it. If you want the backstory behind that, we might tell you. Might tell you. Maybe in the extended, but you got to be on Patreon and figure it out. Anyway, we absolutely love y'all. Not turkey. Can't wait to see you. You turned into like a Scottish book reader when you said that. Well, not turkey. Anyway, we love y'all. Can't wait to see you next week. Thanks for sticking around this long. Confuse everybody on social medias. LOI. We absolutely love y'all. Oh, shit. And remember, one out of ten qualifiers don't make it home to Christmas and we will see you

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