Ep 175: We Might Be Running For President [Ft. Andrew Yang]
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Hey! I did nothing wrong. Everything I just said was PG. Well, it would be fun to have her on if she was down to talk about that. Really? You're going to cut all this out, right? Oh, no! And now we're starting. Oh, my God. We're cutting everything we just said out. Yeah, cut all that. That was bad. All right. Wow, Mary. I've done some bad things in my life, Mark. Well, that's on her. And me.

Yeah, it was almost on her. I'll tell you that much. Cut that part out, too. What the fuck are you doing? I'm describing her now. Incriminating. Okay, okay. Now we start. You can keep that and just cut that part. Names, yeah.

We'll bleep it. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. What is this, Fargo? Out of respect for the survivors. Don't you hate when they say based on a true story? Just tell me the true story. Well, guess what? Fargo is not a true story. They're just doing that because they did that with the movie and it was like a cool. But then they're like, you know, this is all the events that are being told actually happened. Then they're like, they haven't.

Of course. You know, if he wanted to show you, you're like, that ain't fucking real. No, no, but what a great story, Fargo. It was fun. The fucking car salesman guy, William H. Macy, killed it. Francis McDormand is the cop with the cop husband. That was great. Oh, man. Such a good story. Buscemi, the other guy. Oh, dude, I mean, we've played it so many times in this pod, but the grandpa getting killed. Ooh. Yeah, yeah. Right in the gut. Yeah.

And it's so fucking, this is how good the Coen brothers are, is they like, they will do the most violent shit. Yeah. And they'll do it in kind of a funny way. Yes. And the genes of the Coen brothers, they have the best character actors in cinema. Ever. Like, I mean, when, what's his face? Javier Bardem goes to that like a gas station in the middle of nowhere. And that, that guy behind the counter, he's like, heads or tails. The guy's like, I don't know what you're talking about.

Whatever, and it's so, they're all great. You're right, they're all killers. Also, I mean, Javier Bardem, just with that fucking haircut. Oh, yeah. Here we go. Ooh, wait, gotta get the sound on for that. We've watched this so many times. What's the fucking joke here? Sounds like Sam when he comes on a roof.

You almost expect him to call me young whippersnapper as soon as he dies. Yeah. As long as they kept that take. I mean, I guess it's pretty realistic. Yeah, it's pretty damn fucking dark. Oh, yeah. This whole movie is like pure neo-noir, man. You know what I watched last night for the first time? By the way,

Anyone who I hear how many young people do you complain? They're like, I have insomnia. You're like, all right, what do you do right before bed? They're like, I watch prisoners and the exorcist. I'm like, oh, cool. I wonder if that's playing a role. Right. Because Night Stalker, it's all true crime. It's all true crime or just a dark movie. Yeah. And and you're looking at a screen.

Yep. You're looking at your computer. I'm like no more. I might not do a TV in the bedroom ever. I don't do that. I don't have one in my bedroom. Too much. I think it might be a bad idea because now I force myself to read and I fall asleep. Reading works. But I did watch Sicario before bed. I'd never seen it. Oh, amazing. You've never seen it? I always dated a woman who had seen it. So every time it came up, they were like, I've already seen it. I'm like, well, I want to see it. Right. And it was one of those that was like –

You know, it was always like a little too late on the road. And the last night I was like, fuck it, I'm watching it. Man, Benicio is cool. Oh, yeah. That is an underrated film. I don't feel like people talked about it enough. It's so good. That writer, Taylor Sheridan, just. Is that him? Yeah, he's just kind of a beast.

He's great. He did fucking Hell or High Water. Amazing. He did so many good movies. Oh, yeah. Wow. And Yellowstone. Yellowstone's a huge hit. I mean, I feel a little cheesy watching it because it's basically a soap opera. Yeah, it's not my favorite. I like his movies better, but Hell or High Water is like a fucking masterpiece. Masterpiece. I think it was nominated for best pick. Should have been. Or at least best screenplay. Loved it. But yeah, Sheridan, he's a killer. Yeah.

Yeah, I got a wreck if we're going right down the barrel here. We should probably explain this border wall here. I saw a guy on Instagram. We should credit this guy because I have no idea. We should credit him. Because I saw him. He's like a whiskey. He's like a cocktail guy. Alcoholic is the term. He's an alcoholic. Yeah. So I saw him do the Cinnamon Toast Crunch thing.

old fashioned I was like that looks kind of good oh yeah so we start you know me Peters Norman were on the text thread I was like what if we did some other serials yes and then

Look at this guy. He gets Reese's peanut butter puffs. Yeah. This was not allowed in my house growing up. Oh, yeah. That's crack cocaine right there. That's fentanyl. I wanted Cracklin' Oat Bran, old fashions. Oh, yeah. But they discontinued it. That's my favorite cereal. Very regional. Never heard of that in my house. I never heard of Cracklin' Oat.

But we got the cinnamon. I'm kind of, what are you most pumped to try these three? I'm least pumped for the Cocoa Puffs one. I was, it's just, cause I feel like it's just going to be chocolate. It's chocolate. Cinnamon toast crunches. I can't miss, but I'm a peanut butter fanatic. Why don't you start off the peanut butter and I'll start off the cinnamon toast crunch. Well, we should also describe, would we leave this soaking overnight with cereal in it? Okay. This is just fucking pure sugar. It's whiskey and sugar.

By the way, you should all be following us on punchup.live slash samorell and punchup.live slash marknorman. Yes. It's just uncensored shit that we won't post on Instagram or they'll bury on Instagram and YouTube. And we post tour dates. It's a cool new thing.

This guy Danny Frankel is helping us get going on it. It's great. So follow us on that shit. Yeah, look who's on it. Rick Glassman, Tim Dillon, all these people. Norman. Adam Ray. Adam Ray, Jordan Jensen. A lot of funny people. He has good taste. All right, there we go. You get the point. Did you have to look like a urine sample? Did you have to get the stool sample sperm bank? This smells... I mean, I guess it's just whiskey and peanut butter, right? So it smells...

Poden as hell. Do you want to do the honors with this one or do the honors with... You go. You go. Break the hymen. Get in there. Oh, boy. Describe everything. What are your senses feeling? I'm getting notes of peanut butter. Oh, that's exciting. Okay. Sam's going down the gullet. All right. Fuck, that's pretty damn good. Oh, come on. Holy shit.

That is a problem. Mama. Come on. I think we need a peanut butter bodega cat blend. Oh, don't tease me, Fetty. That is crazy.

How close are we getting to New York City, the Bodega Cafe? I mean, it might be out now because we are pre-recording this. What do you think? Almighty, that's good. It's too much. It's too much for the sentence. It's like a speedball. Yeah, it's the thing I don't think I could really drink. Yeah. But damn do I appreciate it. You know when the milk takes over the cereal at the end and the milk is colorful and all that? That's what it tastes like with a kick of whiskey. Let's see what we got here. I'm going to start off the Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Swirl it. That's heavy duty. See, the problem is the sugar makes you want to chug it. Oh my god. Yeah, the smell is really fucking overwhelming. I'm getting notes of this one. I'm getting notes of cinnamon. Notes of toast. Some notes of crunch. Alright, I'm going in on the chocolate. This is crack. Really? More than the other one? You know how this would be good if you watered it down? Because it's too sugary.

Yeah, I agree. The ice would cut it. The ice would cut it, but also I think the way you put a little water in whiskey sometimes, or in a scotch and water.

That's no good. No good? That's a bomb. I had doubts about Cocoa Puffs. Yeah. I was never a Cocoa Puffs guy. It was a one-note cereal. It's one-note. I like a chocolate cereal, but yeah. Cocoa Krispies were better, though. I got to fight you on that one. Really? Too soggy. Soggy? Yeah, these held their shape for a little longer. Oh, I do like older women. Yeah.

By the way, it's good to be back on Taste Buds. I don't hate it. It's all right. I think you lowered my expectations. Okay, okay. It's okay. You know what might be nice is Fruity Pebbles, something other than the...

Chocolatey. You know what? I wonder if the fruity, yeah, maybe it would work. Fruity pebbles are crack. Yeah. That shit's good. Yeah, that's good stuff. Captain Crunch knew what he was doing. This would be a good, that would be good. Yes. Crunch berries. Oh, yeah. This would be a hilarious way to get like one of our sober friends back on booze. I fell back off, man. It was a peanut butter puff old fashioned. Yeah. Kids, don't do this at home, by the way.

Wow, this one might be the winner. The cinnamon. It's just too sweet. I think if we throw a little water in there, we got a fucking good cocktail. Oh, yeah. Wow, thank you, Matt. I mean, I can't imagine your wife's going to leave you because you're a seven-year-old alcoholic. You're mixing breakfast foods and booze at night with a... We're going to call this a Drew Barrymore. What, a Corey Feldman on the rocks? Hey, I like that. Oh, yeah.

Woo! That is good stuff. So is this our guy here?

That's him! That's him. Let's get the name out there for credit. Tim the Tank Official. I feel like he does a lot of cool shit on here. Yeah. He's doing a lot of cool mixology stuff. This is what we found. This is who I saw. Wow. This is what the territory is. Have you ever just had an idea that you started acting on and mid through that idea while you were doing it you realized to yourself, "Holy crap, this is a better idea than I thought"?

this is that idea right now put this in the fridge and let it sit overnight the wait is finally over so let's go ahead and strain this into a bottle there's a few things we can all agree on one of those is that soggy cereal is gross finally we're going to add in four ounces of our cinnamon toast crunch bourbon yeah it's more sugar here i think you can always use the rye as well those were just as good with old fashions you know we should have done sugar three or four down added more sugar

What a psycho. This is already fucking crap. Well, we should have sprinkled a little in there on top. Because that's what he did. Yeah. It's all right. It's all right. We'll be back. You did good work, Matt. Thank you, Matt. Really? I might take one home. Oh, we should do a check-in on Winnie because I hear she might be back next week. Yeah, big win. We should do a California check-in. Yeah, she's out. She's out.

She's out west getting her son. She's popped off since she started doing We Might Be Drunk. She's out west doing some auditions. I mean, she's in her element there. That's her natural habitat is that L.A. sun. Just looks miserable. He looks like Walter Matthau.

All right. So my rec, you got to see the Steve Martin doc. Oh, you told me last night. I can't talk good about it enough. It's so well done. And you read the book, right? I read the book. It's basically the book come to life. So you get to see footage. You get to see him bombing. You get to see him with a beard in the 60s, early 70s. It's fucking fascinating. You thought we struggled. This guy went through hell.

I can assume that he, I mean, just from reading that book, I assumed he went through shit. Oh, yeah. I mean, he's so fucking funny. Like, I feel like young people may not know, but like the jerk. Oh, my God. Incredible. Fucking hilarious. And I say you watch you feel like a fraud because we do comedy. He changed comedy. He changed the whole thing.

And it obviously was such an uphill battle to do what he did. Because you see a guy with an arrow through the head, you're like, oh, this guy's a hack. So you immediately hate him. But he made it. It was so bad, he made it good. It's really brilliant what he got accomplished. He knew the rules to break things.

Yeah, I think a lot of people forget that I think they could just break the rules But like if you know what you're doing and you can write a killer joke you can do the other weird shit, too Totally totally, but they show all the learning that you know because in the beginning he was just bad He's bad with an arrow in his head

Did you see it yet, Sam? I haven't. I'm going to see it. What's it on? Apple. It's on Apple, yeah. He has a great moment. Oh, sorry, Mark. I cried. That's the last thing I'll say. And I'm not a crier. John Crier. Go. Sorry. He was just saying how he sort of figured out halfway through doing this, he was like, oh, I'm deconstructing comedy. Yeah. He didn't even realize it. Yeah.

And then he was like, this character I'm doing is sort of making fun of show business itself while I'm trying to be in show business. Very intellectual stuff. Yeah, and they get into the process of writing the jokes, which is kind of rare and cool. And you pointed out there's no talking heads.

It's just Steve Martin and you hear from other people but he's in a conversation. Wait, that's a talking head right there. Wait a minute. That's part two. I didn't see part two yet. All right, all right. Oh, it's a series. It's him back in the day and then him now.

Him now is heavy and great, seeing him as an old man. He's so serious sometimes. Oh, my God. He's a big nerd. He's very serious. I love him with Martin Short. Oh, they go through all that. So you got to see it. They're like made to do shit together. I love watching their Hulu show. Yeah. Yeah, it's amazing. The ball busting they do is unbelievable. It's fun. It's fun. That's how you do it. That's how you do it. It's just silly and...

Yeah, they're just two comedy icons going at it. Three Amigos, I realize, is kind of Tropic Thunder before Tropic Thunder. Ooh! Right? Yeah. Good eye. Good call. That's a fun movie. I love both of them, just saying. I've seen that movie nine million times. I have it on VHS, Three Amigos. Old school. Yeah, so very old one. So like the wind.

I just started. Shout out Gary Veeder. He got me the Caddyshack book. I just started this Caddyshack book. It's the making a Caddyshack. And it's like they were such fucking degenerates. Oh, the cocaine, the booze, the whores, everything. Yeah, but. It's a better time. How did you have that ready? He sent me this already. Oh, that's fun. I love it.

All I see from this is that Rodney works in every generation. You got that right. Remember the first time you heard Rodney's story about Caddyshack where they would go, all right, and action. And he would do his lines. No one laughed. He goes, Chevy, I'm bombing out here. And he's like, it's a movie.

We can't just laugh at you. But the first time I heard that as a comedian, I was like, oh my God, I'm not alone. I love that he's been singing in the rain too. Oh yeah. Dude, I mean, just a fucking icon. I love, yeah, I love just hearing these stories too about how they all thought it was going to be a bomb caddy show. Oh yeah. It's like,

Another relatable moment. What's the guy who made it? Doug Kenny? Yeah. Doug something? And Bill Murray's brother co-wrote it, right? Yeah, yeah. And who else? And Harold Ramis. Brian Doyle and Harold Ramis. Yeah, those are like the comedy icons. Not like the gods of behind-the-scenes comedy. Yeah, like the Harvard. Yeah. Nash Lampoon. Yeah. They did all that shit. So they changed the comedy game, and then the guy who saw it or who made it, what's his name, Doug? Doug.

Yes. This is nerd comedy shit. He saw Airplane. He's like, I'm the funniest guy in the world. I make the best comedy. No one can touch me. Then he went and saw Airplane. He goes, I suck. This is the best comedy. And then he killed himself. Yeah. Not to give it away. Yeah. So don't see Airplane. Yeah. Don't get into comedy. No, I actually just rewatched Naked Gun. Oh. Man, there's some great fucking moments. Gold. Pull up that scene where he's doing the interrogation. You know what I'm talking about? I don't.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, I love that scene. This is fucking comedy gold. That's vaudeville shit. That's going back to Abbott and Costello and all that stuff. Man, Leslie Nielsen just knows how to fucking deliver a joke, too. Well, he's the most serious actor and the most not serious. It's the second one. Oh, it's on this? Maybe this. I think this is it on the pier. But the other one was a shorter version. Oh, chalk outline in the water. I mean, that's a great sight gag. Here it is. This is great. You know what? I have just a question. Do you have a menu with that face?

I remember he ain't so great. Oh, maybe this will refresh your memory. I don't know, it's still kind of hazy. How about this? Yeah, I remember him. I used to see him around. Why do you want to know? I can't tell you that. Well, maybe this will. Yeah, you still don't think so? All right, his name is Dogbert. I'm telling you, he was dirty. Girl, I'm running right now. All right, all right. You weren't the one we shipped. Had to push something on one of my boys, I swear. So why are you going to do fine, copper? Why should I tell you?

You know that was like a tag at the last moment. We should have him do it again. We should ask for money. Gotta keep heightening it. It's so good. It breaks the whole trope. It's so dumb that it becomes smart. Yes, yes, exactly. Deconstructing comedy, just like Martin.

Yeah. So you have to know comedy so well to be able to reverse it. I love it. It's actually pretty impressive. I remember one time at the cellar, I think Tracy Morgan was like, it's all about comedy. It's not about being funny. It's about comedy. And then I saw him at that MSG show and he's like, it's not about comedy. It's about being funny. Ha ha ha.

Both times I'm just nodding like, yes. Yeah, right. What's that Norm quote from Rodney? He's like, stand up. It's all about stand up, man. It's all about stand up. Movies, they're shit. TV, it's shit. Stand up, it's all shit. I'm butchering it. No, I know where you're going. Something like that. Stand up is the only holy thing left. Yes. And then even then he turns on stand up. Yes, exactly. That's what I love about it. Exactly.

inspired you how long is it you gotta you gotta find the because this could be uh too long but yeah you you find it you figure it out oh it's captioned perfect yeah man um this is because is there more of a comedy pod than this i mean we love it we've we've touched on naked gun zucker brucker caddy shack doug kinney steve martin rodney norm i got it here all right

Favorite. Yeah.

- Yeah. - He'd show up late in a bathrobe with his balls hanging out. - Yeah. - My dad did that. - Talk about not giving a fuck. You worship that. You wanna be that guy who doesn't give a fuck, right? - I met Rodney, man, when I was- - He doesn't even answer him. - I made the worst mistake ever, which I was in the fucking hotel and I loved Rodney's shit, I didn't know him.

And I was coming down in the casino. I was coming down the fucking elevator. Like a nine-year-old fucking. So anyways, I worked on some stupid fucking thing with this director. He said he worked for Rodney. Director.

I go, you know, Paul Johnson, he was that cuck.

I don't remember that part. That wasn't even it. That's another great one. Great, great. I'm thinking about bad business. Speaking of me and Mark, dude, I mean, you know, we're trying to get Bodega Cat off the ground. We are so incompetent. Oh, this is great. We have to set up an LLC. I,

I just drown in emails. So I just get anxious and I just stop opening them. It just makes me crazy. Is that how you are? Yeah, we're one and the same. I'm just like, I can't look at another one. I see an email. I think it's the same thing over and over again for some reason. I see an email. It's been responded to. I notice like,

I'm like, oh shit, this is about us setting up an LLC for Bodega Cat. Yeah. Which we've been trying to do for two years. And we're just idiots. So I see Mark's responded. I see Mark's responded like eight times and I haven't responded. Mark's like, oh yeah, yeah, I'll be at the bank. It's at this bank. Sure, I'll be there. We picked the bank by your house. We picked the bank by my place. We were close to you two. Yeah, yeah.

But we're like, you know, we picked this bank and they're like, Mark's like, I'm in, I'll be there. And then she goes, you guys didn't show up today. And Mark's like, ah, fuck. And then that's where I pick up. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm sorry. So then you missed it too. I would have felt horrible if you were there. This is how we do business. We're both like, oh fuck. Eight people setting up a meeting and then we both just are like, ah, shit. I don't know. Meanwhile, our biggest priority is Reese's Pieces whiskey. Yeah.

We're like, hang on Matt, you gotta get three boxes, we gotta try 'em all before the guests come. We're fucking incompetent business people. We don't know what we're doing. So, but also the emails, the way they just bottle up. I know. I'm too tired, I quit. Yeah, that's a peeve. You know how you try to, it's like, you have six unread emails, but it's all one email, but it's just a different- I hate that shit, I know. And you have to, if you don't look at each one, they don't count as read.

It unloads. It drives me crazy. It unloads in a way where you're like, holy, it's like, just keeps, it's like the magician. Yes. Just keeps taking the thing out. The scarves. Never ends. I know. You're just scrolling. Like, where's the latest one? They keep getting smaller, you know? They go to the right. That's the whole thing. I got a peeve. This is about our buddy Gary Veeder. Oh. The friend. I love you, Gary, but it's a peeve. You have that friend who, like, you know, whenever it's convenient, they're like, I live in Jersey, but without traffic, 20%.

20 minutes. Oh, that's the biggest. Guess what? There's always traffic. Yep. And then guess what? When you need something from them, they're like, I'm in Jersey. I'm an hour and a half away. Oh, great. I thought you were 20 minutes away without traffic. Yes. It's that whole thing. Like that Seinfeld episode where she's like, is that winning in traffic? You just bought her up. 20 minutes.

Where they go, hey, they got the ski equipment. And she's like, here you go. And she's like, I'm three blocks from my house. And the girl's like, the other lady's like, yeah, three blocks, easy walk. And she's like, yeah, but you could just drive me. And she's like, but it's three blocks. And the other girl goes, yeah, it's three blocks. And now they're fighting over three blocks. But it's a great point because it's like, yeah, it's three blocks, just walk. Yeah, but it's three blocks, so just drive. So they just- Whose side are you on? I'm on the drive side because she's like, well, if I go up three blocks, I got to turn 18 one ways and all that. But it's like-

Which one is it? Is it really three blocks? It's so easy? Or is it not three blocks? It's so easy. So it's kind of a philosophical debate. But yeah, it's so true. There's a lot of philosophical debates on Seinfeld. Yeah. You know what I was just listening to? I was listening to Julia Louis-Dreyfus podcast.

and uh she has a podcast she's a pod and i only listen the first 10 minutes because someone sent it to me like you should hear this because it's about making a show and she talks about how progressive seinfeld was for its time because she talks about the contest episode yeah she was like man i felt so lucky to be on that show because you know they do this masturbation bet i know but like every other like first off it was edgy to get that on on nbc they never say the word masturbation they get it on tv

Where it takes a leap is like she goes, okay, any other sitcom of its time would have made the bet about Elaine. It would have been like she walks in wearing something slutty and all the guys are like, you think we cannot jack off? But Seinfeld, she's like, Seinfeld's so ahead of its time that they included Elaine in the bait. In the bait? Masturbate and bet. I combine the two. Right. They include her in the bet and now they give her odds, right? Yes, of course. But it's like...

You know. That great Kramer delivery. She's like, well, I do it too. And he goes, not every day. Look, shaking his throat. So good. No, it was, she's cool. I love her. Oh, I'm a huge, she's a, put her on the dream guest list. That's a dead wall. No, sorry, wrong wall. Put her on the dream guest list. You know? He's also dead.

Polly Walnuts. By the way, she's making a bid for greatest comedy actor of all time. If you think about all of her shows. I don't think there's, if we're talking like, is there an argument? Three shows, she won an Emmy? Yeah. By the way, that episode won an Emmy. The contest won an Emmy. But yeah, Veep is incredible. She's amazing in Veep. She was on SNL as well. The New Stories of Old Christine, she won Emmys for that. Yeah, she's a powerhouse.

Veep is fucking incredible. It's a joke a minute. Yeah. It's so good. And it was doing political before political was like all the rage. Do you get political in a very, like we're all full of shit type of way? Yes.

That's a good, that's the right way to do political comedy. That's a good angle. No side pick, just it's all bull. We're all out for ourselves. We're all trying to fuck. There's something really funny about everyone trying to fuck everyone over at all times. Oh, 100%. Even within her own camp, they're trying to fuck each other over. Yeah, which is kind of realistic. That's kind of how everybody's working. Oh, yeah, because everyone's terrified. Yes. Everyone's terrified to lose their job. Exactly.

Speaking of political, we got a fun guest. What was it? Not bad to look at either. And a very underrated hot lady. Yeah. She's an underrated hot lady because she didn't ever lead with it. Right.

But she was so much more than that. I mean, she's so funny. Led with the talent. I mean, she did have a giant wall of hair in the 90s for some reason. I don't know who's ideal. It's so funny. We watched it and we're like, that was not. That wasn't good for anybody. I guess Jerry had the same hair. He had that big. The poof. Yeah, the big curly poof. Did you pull up the Portland Seinfeld pictures? Seinfeld, if it was done in Portland.

Oh, I've never seen that. Look at that wall. I mean, it's a beehive of hair. Yeah, it's not the best. I mean, she's got such a pretty face. I know. I was on Colbert with her. What? Yeah, I wish I got to meet her. Oh, my God. I'm not going to bother another guest. I would put Tina Fey in the underrated hot as well. For sure. She's a pretty lady. Same thing as Julia Louis-Dreyfus. We just think of her as funny. Yeah. 30 Rock is so fucking good. So good. Also, Julie Louis-

Rich kid, still talented. So it kind of puts that whole thing to bed. You got to be from the streets and depressed and all that shit. I guess you can still be depressed if you're rich, but you know what I mean. What are you pulling up? He said the Portland Seinfeld. Oh, there's like Gen Z Seinfeld. It's really funny. They all have like necklaces on. And George has like arm tattoos. Yeah. Yeah.

Hey, that's something. That's not it. That's not it, but that's something. You're getting there. Okay, then. I can't click on this because it's going to say who I am. Did you see Seinfeld introducing Billy Joel's 100th show at the Garden? What did he say? It was pretty great. He just praises him, how great he is. He's like, I'm from Long Island. You're from Long Island. Your music makes us feel like we're all friends with each other. And thanks for selling me that house. It was a great... Really? He bought Billy Joel's house in Long Island, in the Hamptons. We're all in this together.

But we're not. We're both much richer than all of you. Yeah, yeah. I bought his house. No, you can't find it. Damn it, Salacuse. Oh.

Any other peeves? I got some peeves. I got another too. Yo, hit me. I wrote two down today, so let me pull that up. By the way, I apologize if I repeated jokes in the last one. I realized I was looking at jokes from an old email. You ever just type in jokes in your Gmail and just an older one pops up for some reason? Of course, yeah. I hate that shit. That's the worst. That's a peeve. Oh, look at this. Oh, he looks like Veeder. Wow. They look Dominican here. I know, right? They went more ethnic. This isn't it. This isn't the one I was thinking of, but this is funny. That works.

Oh, jeez. He looks grizzled. She looks kind of hot. Oh, that's Elaine. That's Marissa Tomei. Is it? I think so. I don't know. I think it was Elaine. Oh, the leather jacket. The legend.

Jerry still, the face shouldn't change, but whatever. What about the peeve? Oh, I thought I wrote two down. I wrote one, how about this guy? This is getting away with murder. This is my peeve. The guy who goes, you're wrecked. It doesn't have to be you're wrecked. It could be anything. Those pants, that haircut. I don't want to say it's...

That's not the right word. And I'm like, you just got away with calling me ugly. You go, I don't want to say, I don't want to say those pants are too tight, but that's not the word. I don't want to say your mother's a two-timing whore, but. But.

Well, guess what? I'm not repeating that part to my mother. Yeah, exactly. You get away with murder by saying, I don't want to say this word, even though you just literally just said that word, and now that word's in my head. Even if you didn't want to say it, you just said it. Come guzzling cocksucker is not the word. Yeah, that's not it. Give me a synonym for that. Gay. Right? So I hate the...

uh i don't want to say insert word here i don't mean that but you just said it and so it's in my head either way you form your thoughts and then come back to me when you can put a sentence together there you go yeah i'm with you that i don't want to say you're right you're saying it you're saying it it's been said and you're getting away with saying it you're saying i don't want to say yeah oh i was working by the way i was working i got something out of on uh new jokes i had two that may be something i was working on that one about um

We were riffing the other day about knowing, how knowing sucks. Yes. Knowing is bad because, you know, you eat a tuna melt, right? You feel great. Then you see the calories. You're like, fuck. Yeah. It ruins it. I know. It's like you ever date someone early on and you're like, this is amazing. Then you get to know them. Not as good. Oh. Something there. I'll play with that. Yes. I had something else, too, about. What was the thing we couldn't remember that he gave you the clip on? Oh, it was just about that. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. Because I was racking my brain. I couldn't think of it.

I got other bits, but I have a peeve, too. Hit me with a peeve. You ever have a friend hit you up? They're from out of town. They go, let's hang out. I'm in town. I leave tomorrow. Ah, now you got a deadline. So I got 90 minutes notice? Yeah. Or I'm a bad friend? You're the bad friend. Give me notice. Notice. It's like an action movie. So here's what I say. Sorry.

It's a ransom. Yeah. No, this is what I did. It's a good move. I said, I'm going to the cellar. You're welcome to meet me. Oh, that is good. And the ball's in his court. And he didn't come. So he's the bad friend. So not only do you have to meet him with a shot clock, you got to go where he wants to go. Exactly. That's no bueno. Related is, hey, we're both going to be in Portland. Let's hang out. Ugh.

It's like, we don't hang out in New York. Why would we hang out in Portland? That's a good point. That's a good point, yeah. On the West Coast, we're friends all of a sudden? I had this exact thing happen to me. I'm scared to say it because he might hear it. I don't want to be mean. Who cares? I don't want to be mean to the guy. Yeah, same here. All right, well. No, just say it. I don't want to say this guy sucks. But this guy is in a band called

At one of the comedy clubs, he plays in the band, never had a conversation with this guy, never, I don't know the guy's name. Yeah. He calls or he texts me, he goes, I got your number from so-and-so. I'm in Little Rock. Let's hang out. And I'm like, now I pull this one. I go,

How many tickets you need? I got you, baby. That's smart. Get them in the show. Got them free tickets. Bring a friend. I'm off the hook. And he goes, great. I need two. It means the world to me. I go, oh, you got it. Then he goes, what are you doing after? And I do the whole bullshit of like, well, you got to settle up and I got to sign some autographs. I got to do some promo shoots and whatever. Collect my merch. A lot of autographs in Little Rock. Yeah.

It's a big line. Oh, my Clinton? So I do the meet and greet after. You know, you're meeting some people. This guy barges. He's texting me the whole time. Where are you? Let's hang out. Where are you at? They won't let me back in. They kicked me out. They tased me. Like, everything's getting crazier and crazier. I've been kidnapped. Yeah. Finally, the door kicks open. It's this guy with, like, three security guards. Like, sir, you can't go in there. And I'm like, oh.

He's all right. He's cool. So he barged his way in. Now we have to hang out. And I'm with all the fans and everything or pod people. And it was awkward. Damn. So this guy was not taking no for an answer. I think when you live in Little Rock and anybody you've ever seen before is there, you got to show up. He friendship raped you. Yes. Yes.

It's a friendship rape. That's good. He wouldn't take no for an answer. You're right. But you gave him, you know, you gave him a little bit of hope. What was I wearing? What were you wearing? You invited him to the show. I know. I let him on a little. If I'm a cop and there's a friendship rape, you did invite him in. You're right. Now, can I get a friendship abortion in the world of friendship rape? Not in Arkansas. No.

Or Texas. Can't you get a board in Arkansas? I don't think so. Oh. I'm not sure, though. All right. It feels like you shouldn't be able to. Right. Well, then I got to make a phone call. Yeah. So does Bill Clinton. Yeah. I went on stage. I said, Bill Clinton. They all went, woo. And I went, he's the white P. Diddy. And they went, boo. We had a good time. They love Bill Clinton. The airport's named after him and the library is named after Bill Clinton. The airport's named after him, but he flies in on a different plane. Ah.

Damn, I should have said that. That's good. You know who died at Little Rock or died in Arkansas? Bill Hicks. Oh.

Died in... That's a road comic. Died in Arkansas. Wait, at a hospital he was touring and he died? He had cancer. But I mean, he was touring up until he died? He toured pretty late, but I don't know the... I think he stopped at the end. There was a part in one of the books where he had to get helped off stage because he was so weak. I mean, you have fucking cancer. Yep, there he is. Same cancer that killed Steve Jobs. Lung? Pancreas. Oh, I thought it was lung. Pancreas. Wow. I'm pretty sure. I'll look it up, but pancreas doesn't really do anything, right?

It gets cancer. You're thinking of the spleen. No, it's like something. Oh, appendix maybe? Appendix. What does a pancreas do? You can take that out, which is weird that we have body parts you can take out. Isn't that strange? I never thought about that. Why do I have it if it doesn't serve a purpose? They theorize that it's a leftover stomach. Whoa. Like that we probably once had two to process different foods, and then we're like, we don't do that anymore. Whoa.

You got any other peeves? I had one and now I forgot it. Let me see what I have. Maybe it'll come back to me. I thought I wrote down two. Fuck. I got nothing. I got some joke ideas. I'm not fucking... Man, do you see this actor, Michael Stolbar? Yeah. Got a rock thrown at him by a crazy person in Central Park. What? Never heard of this guy. Oh, you know this actor. He's in A Serious Man. You've seen him in a ton of stuff. He's the lead in the Coen Brothers movie, A Serious Man. Oh.

Wait, is that the Jewish one? Yeah. Yes, that's a great movie. Yeah, you've seen this dude. Pull up his- Oh, yeah, he's good. Yeah, he's really good. What happened? Just somebody didn't like the look? I mean, there's crazy people. Yeah, I guess so. It's still New York. But it wasn't like a targeted- No, it was a homeless guy. Just chucked a rock in the back of his head. Is he okay? He's fine. But it's like the second instance of a Broadway actor being just randomly attacked by a crazy homeless this week. Whoa.

And this guy had like 17 priors for similar shit. Well, you know the rule. If you assault someone without a gun, you get out. Bail reform. Well, he... We can talk to our guest about this. Yes. But also, he...

I saw one of the, I'll read the comments on these sometimes. The New York Post comments are so funny. Oh, yeah. Someone wrote, so what? Actors shouldn't receive preferential treatment. Getting hit by rocks? That's preferential. I don't think anyone should get hit by a rock. That's a bit. Yeah, maybe there's a bit there. I'll play with it. Yes. I'll tell you. Play with it. You're all right. I should warn the listeners, our guest is Mayor Adams. He's coming. We got a bone to pick.

Wow, poor guy. Well, we hope you pulled through, Mike. There he is. That was a good movie. This is one of my favorite Coen Brothers movies. Really? Yeah. Serious Man? Yeah. Yeah, it was good. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, they rarely miss. They're pretty great. That Clooney one was tough. Which one? Intolerable Cruelty. They just wrote that, but that was pretty fun, I thought. That was like a throwback Cary Grant type comedy. That's true. That was kind of fun. Did they do Hail Caesar? I didn't love that. I didn't like that either. But I love moments. I thought Intolerable Cruelty had moments for sure. And Richard Jenkins, good cast. Yeah, you got to love Jenkins. Always good. Billy Bob. Catherine Zeta was so freaking hot in that movie. Billy Bob from Little Rock.

Yeah. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. Man, he's been in some... I mean, we got... I feel like the way we talk about paper playing on this pod was the way people were tagging me in A Simple Plan. Oh, yeah. People love that movie. That's a great fucking movie. And the other one he did, I don't know if I talked about it on the pod, One False Move. It's also Billy Bob and Bill Paxton. It's another... I don't know. It's another 90s noir. It's fucking great. All right.

Even the wife who's bored out of her mind on any good movie loved A Simple Plan. So good. If I put Godfather on, she's out. She'll divorce me. Godfather's a slower burn. It is, but it's a classic. It's one of the best things ever made. It's a three and a half hour flick. Well, that TikTok is just so alluring. It's like everything this movie isn't. This movie is slow, fast.

you know, moody. TikTok is quick, fun, and, you know, it lights up your brain in a way that... It's like an instant dopamine rush. There you go. But then, man, you don't remember the TikToks. Exactly. You remember a great movie experience. You remember a great, like, you know, book. You remember... You don't remember...

The top 30 burgers in downtown Manhattan. Yeah, right, right. You remember your favorite movies and you revisit them and you see different things. It's just, you know, I have to catch myself in it sometimes. Of course. Like even last night, I was like going to think, I was thinking about throwing on a movie with subtitles because I was flipping on Criterion and then I was like...

I don't know if I have the attention span right now. I'm kind of tired. And I'm like, no, fuck me. Get in. Do it. It'll enrich your life. Good for you. And I didn't do it. I watched Sicario. Well, still a great film. And it was a good. And then I watched it. I was so into it. It's such a, you know, uneasy movie. Yeah. Tense. Tense as hell. That I.

I was like, I could have done this for another movie. Yeah, yeah, you're right. You just got to give yourself to it. You got to give. That's the hard part. These youngsters, they can't get over that little hump of boredom. Once you get over that hump- Some of them can. Some of them can. But I shouldn't generalize. But I think the TikTok generation is so used to instant gratification that I think if

If you could teach a kid to get over that hump, you could really get somewhere. It's like Reese's versus stew. You get a nice hearty stew, that's Sicario. This is a fucking breakfast cereal pumped with chemicals and sugar. So you're not going to see Jerry's new Pop-Tarts movie? Not at all! No, no, I can't wait. Let me pee real quick before I guess. Oh, right. I want to fucking...

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We're here with our guest. Sorry, guys. Andrew Yang. No, it's coming through. Hey, guys. I hear there's drinking on this podcast. Yes. You don't drink, though, right? Maybe some cursing. Yes. Whatever you want. A few fucks given here and there. Do you drink or no? I don't really drink very much. I'm one of those people that if I drink, I go to sleep. It's probably a good thing in the scheme of things. Yeah, lucky you. It keeps me up all night and the blow. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

This might be why you lost. You're dressed like hell. Come on, man. I'm just kidding. I could have gone either way. I thought if I had a jacket on, I'd feel very out of place. That's true. You did the right thing. How would you be doing things differently? We were just talking about that. You could have won this. You could have been mayor of New York. Yeah. You could have been in charge of the shithole. I do things exactly the same as Eric. I do things exactly the same as Eric.

We were just talking about how a crazy guy threw a rock at the actor Michael Stolberg. You heard about that? No, I haven't heard the story. Yeah, it just happened. It's getting ugly out there. Fix me up. What do you think about, because we travel, we see the road all the time. We see a lot of cities. Yeah, totally. Or, you know, a lot of people are on drugs. A lot of people don't feel safe. I mean, I feel fine in New York. I love New York, but that's the reputation, right? Sure. Yeah.

Well, I will say, I mean, I've lived here for a long time and the vibe is different. You know what I mean? Like, even if nothing happens to you, you're like, I feel like something could have happened. Yeah. And then things do happen. Like, I've had friends have weird shit go down.

in a way that might not have been the case, you know, let's call it five years ago. Yeah, definitely. Well, there was a box cutter. Do you see that on the subway? A guy had a box cutter. He cut a lady. Then the National Guard was in the subway, I don't know, a week ago, two weeks ago. Sure. Aren't they still there? I mean, nothing's changed, right? They're not at my stop. I could use them.

Yeah. Maybe they rotate. Yeah. We use the same stop sometimes and that stop is not, it's dicey. A lot of character. Sixth Avenue stop. It's two floors of whores. I mean, it's West fourth, you know, so it's. That's a big stop. Yeah. Oh yeah. A lot of lines come through. Sam, do you remember the nineties when you had to carry around muggers money? Oh,

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Like a fake wallet. You'd be like, here you go. Yeah. Quinn's got a great joke about that. What does he say? Well, they'd rob you. Colin Quinn has a bit where they rob you and they'd be like, I don't have any money. You go, but you got your mugger money. He's like, oh, yeah, of course. You know?

Had to have your mugger money. You're an upstate guy, right? Well, I was born in Schenectady. My dad worked for GE and then moved to IBM. And it's very nerdy sounding, I know. Sorry, guys. Let it out. But I grew up in Schenectady and then Westchester County. So, you know.

New York product in terms of Z100 and the Knicks. Knicks or Knicks? So, okay. I was a hardcore Knicks fan until they dropped Jeremy Lin. And you can imagine...

the feelings you would have as the Asian American Knicks fan who Jeremy Lin was your shining light and then drop him over money. It seemed like the biggest bullshit in the world. Yeah. The Rockets gave him a contract and the Knicks said, okay, we're not going to match that contract. They let him go, yeah. I mean, this is the franchise that gave Jerome James $30 million. That's like 20 years ago.

You're bringing up a lot of old stuff here. The Knicks do not lose people because they get paid, but on this one, they were like, oh, we're going to let this guy go, even though he was the best part of being a Knicks fan for X years. He was awesome. That was a magical two weeks. Two weeks? Was that it? Linsani went for two weeks. I loved it, but it wasn't like- It was a hot moment, I'll tell you that. I wanted him as a Knick, for sure. Yeah, yeah. Don't get me wrong. He was ours. He's come to the cellar before. He's a great guy. He's very cool. Sure.

It is kind of a flex to say when I ran for president.

Yeah, it's pretty cool. Sounds good. It does sound. I mean, how do you how do you just say I'm going to run? Like, what's the process? Well, believe it or not, anyone can run if they're 35 years or older and born in the US. There's only two rules. And so there's absolutely nothing stopping the Norman moral ticket. Yeah. It's a little late for 24, but 28. Yeah. Or you could reverse. Everyone will be drunk. Yeah.

You could run on whatever platform you want. Okay. But those are the only rules, guys. Legit. Now, the two-party system has kind of locked up the process, so it's a little bit trickier than all that. In my case, I ran as a Democrat and had to get polling at a certain level. I actually talk about this in my last book because I'm a serial entrepreneur.

And I just saw it as an entrepreneurship challenge. It's like, okay, how do you get on the ballot? How do you get on the debate stage? How do you raise the money to compete, et cetera, et cetera. And believe it or not, there are a lot of parallels between that process and what you guys do. Come on. I think there are three overlapping fields. I try and explain this to people.

Politics, comedy, professional wrestling. Whoa. Those three things intersect in very serious ways. Yeah. Jesse Ventura. I mean, Trump was a fucking wrestling villain, if you actually remember. That's right. Like kind of anti-hero hanging out with McMahon and the crew. Yeah. Shit chest McMahon. People talk about The Rock all the time running for president. I mean, it's in part because he can just go in and command a crowd. Guys, I was...

at a number of political events and literally they would say 60 seconds go and you're essentially cutting a wrestling promo in front of a bunch of people. So my wrestling fandom really paid off because I would channel DDP or The Rock or whoever the fuck in that moment. But when you're

comedian, it's very similar where you get in front of people. Now, you guys are big time, so people who come to your shows actually know and like you. But a lot of the time, you are in front of people who don't know who you are from Adam. And then you give a talk. I mean, you try and catalyze emotions in them. So in your case, it's humor. In my case, I actually did use humor sometimes.

And then you literally. Inspire hope though too. You got to use hope. Hope sometimes, sure. And change. And then you inspire them. And then you're literally like, hey, I'm Andrew Yang. I'm running for president. I'll be back. And then you come back and you hope the crowd's a little bigger. I'm sure that sounds pretty familiar to you guys. You do the road. You build your audience. So I worked bars, bowling alleys, like you name it. So did we. In Iowa and New Hampshire. What's the worst crowd you ever had?

I mean, I had some terrible crowds. You're getting heckled a lot? You know what's fun, though, is most of the people in Iowa and New Hampshire, which are the main early states I campaigned, and I campaigned all over the place, but last cycle, it was Iowa and New Hampshire. They're very friendly. They're very...

generous and cordial. Like if you meet folks in these environments, and by the way, I also say to folks, it's like, you know who understands how most of America functions? Comedians, road comedians. You got that right. Because you guys go in front of crowds all over the country. They're not particularly, yes. I mean, it's one reason why Trump is as

prominent as he is he's essentially an insult comic right political figure plus media figure plus everything like kind of lump plus pro wrestling villain yeah all lumped together and he's become uh this uh movement leader essentially in a way that the system just doesn't know what what to do with um

He works out, like his nicknames, he works them out. I see him working them out. Where he's like, he'll be like, fat Ron DeSantis. And he gets nothing. Then he's like, meatball Ron. And I get to laugh. He's like, that's in the act. Yes. Yes. He workshops. Yeah. He workshops it. And then when he finds something that clicks, he's like, okay.

Sleepy Joe was big for him. That was a big. Crooked Hillary. He also used Twitter slash X as a focus group too. You would hit it and be like, ooh, that touches the nerve. And then we're just going to use that again. He plays the media in a particular way. Yeah.

So there's a lot of parallel. Oh, yeah. I say to folks, too, I talk to comedians. I'm friends with different comedians. And I say, OK, which comedian would you nominate to run? And so who do you think they are? Jon Stewart, probably. Bill Cosby. Get him out of jail. Get him out of jail.

I think he's too old or they pulled him out. He's touring. I got to say, I did see a Bill Cosby. He was actually at a Jon Stewart benefit. What? It was before we all knew he was...

Yeah. You know, a sicko and everything. So he but he's there. And then he did an act. And it was the darkest act of all time. Bill. Bill Cosby. Well, I'm raping the world. It was. And you were kind of waiting to laugh. But you're like, this is just dark and disturbing. Whoa. It's what kind of material we talking?

I mean, shit. It's probably on tape somewhere. It's like a Jon Stewart. It was Wounded Warrior or the Mission Continues. You put the pill in the drink. Yeah, so it was before that was, you know, frankly, like we were sure. I think it was even before he was accused. It was like X years ago. And then, but it was a very, very, you guys know too, and this is one of the things I love about comedy, is that when a comedian gets up there, and you can kind of sense sometimes when

They're in a dark place. Oh, sure. You guys even too. It's like you're up there, you do your bit. Yeah, but we do it every night. I mean, we do comedy every night. So you're not in a good mood every night. Totally. But then they're like, but be real on stage. Like, well, real, I'm going to fake it a little bit because I want it to be a good show. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, remember those Ralphie May years? He was going through a divorce and it was dark. Like, you could see it coming out of him. Yeah. Yeah.

I know what you mean. You can see the darkness. Bill Cosby was emanating darkness at this time. I mean, he was probably on the cusp of being outed or accused. But you talk about the performative element when you guys... That's going to be hard to do comedy with. 63 women are about to come forward. Showtime. Yeah, yeah. So, wait, wait. So...

The performative aspect, you just described, Sam, where it's like I'm in a shitty mood, but you're not here for my shitty mood. You're here for some laughs, so let's give it to you. Same thing in politics. I just got bad news or something's bad with my kids or whatever the heck, and then you're in front of a group of 50 people

early voters in New Hampshire and they're not there for your personal shit. They're there for the uplifted inspiration so then you just freaking put it on. The best example of that is W. Bush when the 9-11 happened he kept reading the kids book. He was like oh yes the bunny hops twice or whatever. Well they need to know how it ended. Yeah that's true. That's true.

Second tower. That's how it ended. But you... So you do have kind of this automaton streak going. Automaton? I don't know that transformer. Or... What's automaton? Or performative. I see. You just are like, okay, I've got the...

role I'm going to inhabit for this period and then whatever goes on you're like I'm in it it's one reason why people are mistrusting politicians because we kind of sense that there's this performance layer affect that they have on all the time it's like okay what's really going on underneath there it's ironic because if they didn't do it they would lose but you have to do it but then you get called and do it and he won

I feel like that's how Trump destroyed Jeb Bush. He was like, look at this guy. He's so scripted. He just like leveled him, right? I mean, that was... Yeah, but I think there's also a side of Trump where he's like, I'm doing this all for America and the common man. And you're like, you don't give a shit about the common man. Right. So I think there is a little bit of veneer, but he is definitely the most honest so far. Yeah, he manages to give off this quote unquote authenticity vibe.

even as he's bullshitting. - Right, right. - Well Fred Thompson used to do that, right? He would show up, he would take a limo to a pickup truck to take the pickup truck to his supporters.

to show like he's a common man. That's hilarious. I mean, it's like, it's like the oldest trick in the book. Like Trump's obviously flying private. He's doing these arena gigs. Yes. Right. And that, that was one of his innovations too. It's like, instead of retail, uh, politicking in the early States, it's like, look, I'm just going to do the airplane hanger land in my plane. I'm not going to sleep in your fucking state. I'm going to get back on my plane. I'm going to get back to my golden tower same night because that, that's the way I roll. Uh,

Jacksonville, Florida, one of the best cities. I'm leaving immediately, but I love this city. Exactly. It's like my plane's right there. I got off and I'll get back on. I'm going to fly off while you guys wait. Well, do you think it's – Not to get all politico on you, but isn't it a little weird that back in the 60s and whatnot, it was super democratic –

John F. Kennedy is going to the West Virginia to talk to the coal miners, and they were all the blue-collar were voting blue. I've heard you talk about that. And then it flipped. I've heard you say, you know, the blue-collar vote used to be the Democrat, right? Sure. Now it feels like it's all red out there in the auto workers and all that, the construction. Oh, the unions are interesting because the unions all have endorsed the Democrats, but then their membership does not vote for the Democrats. Oh.

Oh, interesting. The membership's like, hey, all right, endorse whoever you want. I'm going to vote for Trump. And you can see that up and down different industries. That's interesting. The rank and file are going to vote Trump. Do endorsements do anything? I've heard people say like if Taylor Swift came out and endorsed Biden, it would swing things. But would it –

Would help I feel like people already know kind of where she stands on stuff So what what does that really do do you think that would be impactful? No, it's interesting man because when when I ran for president I I got various endorsements. Who was your biggest one like was it Chappelle? I think Chappelle But I'll say that must have felt pretty good one reason why I I

will always be grateful to Dave is that a lot of celebrities, so I get together with him and he's like, you know, universal basic income makes sense to me. It would help all the folks in Ohio where I live. I'm going to support you. And then a celebrity says that and you're like, oh, well, thank you. You have no idea what that means. And then in Dave's case, what that means is I'm

I'm going to roll up to Iowa while you're campaigning in Iowa, shoot like rush hour themed videos with you, and then perform to a sold out stadium in Ames and then donate all the money from that show to your campaigns like Associated Energy. And then do six hours on stage. And he's like, wait, why was I here again? Yeah, right.

So Dave actually freaking rolled up his sleeves. He then went to South Carolina and then made calls to South Carolina voters on my behalf, did another show, donated the money to the entity. So he freaking grounded out in a way that would be stunning to anyone who... Because most celebrities...

don't want to do anything that's going to like require lots of time and energy but also they want to take like a risk in that way and then Dave just said look like this guy's talking about things that would help the people around me so I'm gonna actually go to the early states I mean it was something I'll never forget wow he's like I will give you money I will support you just work on this trans bathroom law

I don't remember that. So just joking, Dave comedian, the comedian,

Yeah, you guys are probably running the same circle. Oh, yeah, we love them. Because every comedian I know knows every other comedian because you guys are on the same places. We know everybody. Yeah. It's good times that way. So is him... You're probably that way with most politicians. I would assume you know most of them, right? Yeah, I mean, I am friendly with just about all of them. It's true. The ones you would expect. Yeah.

But I also got endorsed by Norm Macdonald around the same period. What? So I was like super grateful for that. He's right there. My hero. Yeah, he's awesome. Really? Yeah. Wow. You know, he couldn't drive.

I didn't know that. Yeah, he's like a brilliant idiot. You know, he can't drive. He lived with his mom. He lived in a studio apartment in L.A., but brilliant guy. But, you know, gambling addiction. Yeah, what did he say to you? He took a gamble on you. Yeah, he took a gamble on me. He said, and he was great even after the campaign ended. He was like, you know, Andrew, you're ahead of your time. Whoa!

No one was ahead of his time. Agreed. Yeah, he was that. So folks like that, it was really awesome because there were people that I admired from afar and then getting to know some of them and then having them get behind me. So where the fuck were you guys? I was on a game.

I was paying attention. I was on there. I'm a fan. I'm voting for you. What year were you on? 16? 20. 20. So- Ugh, tough year. Yeah, it was a tough year. And we wouldn't have made a big dent, I don't think, for you back then. No, I was on board. I was all in right away. That's awesome that you guys have had this ascent over this last number of years. Yeah. It was great. As you said, it takes a while. You do your thing and you're on the road and-

we always quote Bill Burr. He would call it, you know, killing in obscurity. Yes. That sounds right. We're hidden in the middle of the country and we're like, why does no one know who the fuck we are? And then, you know, but then you also have those nights where you're like, people should not know who we are. I'm glad no one was here to see this one. I had one of those last night. Mark followed me at the cellar. I'm doing all new. I thought it was fine. You were so hard on yourself. Well, you got to be hard on yourself to write new shit. Oh, dude, the new shit too because it was not going over well. You're like, fuck, let me just like take out an old reliable. Right.

I did that on one joke. I got mad at the crowd and I said, I bet you'll laugh at a dick joke. And I did an old dick joke and it hit. And I was like, I knew it. Yeah. And it's bittersweet because you're like, hey, that hit. But also, does that mean my old stuff is better than my new stuff? Well, of course it is. I just burned a special. And you're better at it, too. Yes.

But no, the old stuff, I just burned an hour. So you have to start, you know, the process, you start fresh, a new hour. And it's like, it's humbling, man. Someone I just saw, like I saw Michelle Wolf working out some material. Sure. And it was hysterical because it was going over terribly. She was like, I do not care.

But she has big ideas, so she'll stick with it. She's ambitious with her material. But for some reason, it was just really funny how little she cared how well it was going over. I bet she showed she didn't care, but she's a real comic. She definitely cared offstage. I'm sure she was like, fuck.

I don't care what you guys think. She was working the materials actually at Dave's show in Yellow Springs. Nice. You know that they like named a house after her in Ohio. Whoa. I mean like in jest but kind of for real because she got stuck there during COVID. That's right. So she got stuck at comedy sleepaway camp in Ohio. She got stuck at comedy sleepaway camp in Ohio for months during

We all got stuck somewhere. I'd rather be there than I was here. I mean, I live in a fucking shoe box, you know, in New York. I was in LA for a while and that wasn't fun either. I mean, no, there was no good place to be doing that. Maybe Florida was fun, but then you got, but then you got COVID. Sure. But I got it here anyway. Exactly. So that was a long, yeah, I went to that sleep away camp, uh, during that time. And, uh,

Michelle bought like a Vespa, like a European style Vespa. It was just freaking cruising around the roads and cornfields. See, that's living. And it seemed awesome, honestly. Yeah. And then I got on the Vespa and I was like, hey, and I tried it on. Everyone got so nervous. I was like, what the fuck? Are they going to like wreck this thing? Asian driver. I'm cruising. Yeah.

Yeah, no, I took a little offense. It was fine. But that was like a period when I was still. Biden nearly got assassinated by a Schwinn. So we all saw that. Fell off that bike. Remember that? That's true. That's right. That didn't look good. That did not look good. Yeah, I always saw those photos from that sleepaway camp. It was like Jon Stewart, Jim Carrey, David Letterman, you, Chappelle. It was like all these killers and like giant celebrities. I remember being like, oh, I'm stuck in this fucking apartment. It must be so fun to be out there.

You know, he would have you guys out there in a heartbeat this summer if you guys want to go. He actually texted me. I was in Ohio and he texted me. He's like, when do you want to come? And I was already flying back. And I was like, I wish. Well, you know, he just opened a club there. That's what I hear. So he would love to have you guys go and just kill for any time. I'll be killing in about four or five months. Not yet. I'm down. You can go now, man. Just work shit out. Like that's one of the things about his club. I don't think his club is like finished product anymore.

you know, only like, I think people are going there to work shit out. I'm actually going there next week. Oh really? Yeah. What are you going to do? A political set? Um, I mean, I, I've, uh, I show up and just, uh, tell jokes that have nothing to do with politics happily. Really? You really? Yeah, I do. What?

Working on any bits? Yeah, can we hear a few zingers? I mean, you don't have to give away your gold here, but if you do, like, quickie. I'll make you guys a deal. Like, I'll just come by and work some shit out at the clubs here in New York. Hey, I run a show, two shows, one at the Cellar, one at New York Comedy Club. You know what I mean? It's open door. Are you going to run for mayor again? You know, there's a bit of time before I have to make that decision. We could use you.

Yeah. I mean, people come up to me every day on the street and be like, dude, this guy's terrible. I was joking that if I were to run for mayor in 25, my slogan would be, fuck this guy. No.

I think he would win off that. Yeah, because everyone's like, man, fuck this guy. People literally just come up to me on the street and are just like, fuck this guy. That'd be a bad one for Anthony Weiner to use. Fuck this guy. So what would you be doing differently? Uh-oh. So part of the problem with Eric Adams, one, he hires cronies for all these jobs where you're like, why is that person in that role? I think that's disgusting. Anyway, Salakins, what do you think? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

crony number one here oh yeah uh so so that that's issue one uh number two is you can tell the guys just uh you know high in his own um profile majesty whatever like it's really irritating uh and what shitty policies do you have that you could fix

I'll reform the single biggest thing that that upsets me is that in part because he hires folks that aren't necessarily super on the ball. A lot of the agencies are under delivering on the basics. Like, look at the stats around who gets paid.

let's call it money they're entitled to, like aid they're entitled to, food they're entitled to, the measurements have all gone the wrong direction. And so if you have the resources and it's literally your job and responsibility to deliver them and then you're not delivering them promptly and reliably, then people are just throwing their hands up. And that erodes trust pretty quick. So that to me is job one. If you're not delivering on the basics like that, some of the stuff that's happening now

you know, frankly, and I do have this projection sometimes, obviously, because you run for mayor and you think, wow, you know, what would I be doing? And I'll tell you guys a couple of jokes. So when you run for mayor...

Cops come up to you all the time be like hey yang if you win I want on the security detail Because it's full-time pay for I think it's out of two or three days because they rotate on and off uh-huh and so I was joking that We'd have a kumte to decide who's on my security detail and and like no guns. They'd all carry like nunchucks and

Asianize it. I like that. That'd be kind of intimidating, honestly. Yeah. It'd be dope. Some guy tries to assassinate you, he takes a ninja star to the face. Right. Yeah, just have a bunch of...

you know, MMA types walking around me all the time. I mean, I went to, I mean, a number of, I actually got endorsed by the police captains and the firefighters last time. And the guys are such a bunch of studs. And Mayor Adams is a former cop. That's got to hurt, right? Well,

And this did tick me off guys because I got endorsed by the police captains and then I'm like hey guys You know you realize that Eric Adams is a former police captain and this guy's just in endorsed me so like what the hell does that tell you right and That that did not get in my opinion like an appropriate level of coverage

Yeah, yeah. Maybe you'll get coverage here and get you some momentum in the next race. Also, I think the cops are a little peeved, a little bitter about the whole defund. Well, another thing that I would do differently is that right now the next number of police academy classes are –

Not even confirmed yet and we're now yes, we're down at least a thousand cops and folks who hit a certain point Say like I'm out and then some people who are actually just starting out or saying I'm out Wow, so if I were mayor right now I would literally just everywhere I went be like if you want to serve New York we need you we need you to come and serve and protect and be the kind of police officer you want to see your neighborhoods and

uh like please please join the nypd um and i just be a freaking recruitment billboard everywhere i went because if you look at what's going on with cop enrollment right now it's going down retention's going down the tragic death uh the other day is going to hurt at this level i attended a cop's funeral when i was running for mayor and like you see how uh like

I mean, how much they feel it. And a lot of folks are looking up saying, wait, you know, like I can actually become a cop in another community. And, you know, like it's a better situation. And and that's what you have to prevent, really, because you can't have cops leaving and then not replace them. You got to work on your act. This is but.

But no, you're right. You're 100% right. What incentive do you have to be a cop right now? Give us a sales pitch. What incentive do you have to be with the NYPD right now?

The impoverished neighborhoods get hurt the most by the no cops. Well, you're talking about from the person's perspective and you have to say, look, there's a good career here. Yeah. A really good stable career. And the truth is that you get a pension of 50% of your salary after 20 years of service. And so there are folks, by the way, one of the stats that scares the shit out of me is that, uh,

Like 90% plus of the cops who are hitting the 20-year mark are saying, okay, I've done it. I'm out. Which in a way is understandable. But in a way, you're like, okay, I'm losing all my experienced cops. We need some Dennis Franz, NYPD blue type cops. You need some grizzled veterans. Yeah. In this before. That guy. But if you were to say to someone, it's like, look, you put in 20 years.

and then you'll get half your salary for the rest of your life and you go to a young person. I mean, that's actually a fairly unusually good situation for a lot of people. Because, you know, you start, let's say in your mid-20s. I mean, I don't know how old you guys are, but like, you know, imagine being able to quote-unquote

quasi-retire in your mid-40s. I mean, that's... Yeah, but you don't want to get them on money. You don't want to get them on a good gig. You need cops, you need sponsors. You got to get them like a deal with FanDuel or something. They get like some FanDuel credits, some Bitcoin. Mm-hmm.

It can't just be the pension. You need other benefits. You're a cop. You're putting your life at risk. I want a free 500 Knicks Pacers tonight. Dude, I mean, done and done. We'd be like, hey, look, every Knicks game, Mets game, Mets game, I'm a Mets fan. We'll have a lot. I'm sure this stuff's already happening. The union's probably on this one. But

The other thing is I talk to a lot of cops during the race and after, and morale is a real thing. Morale is big. So if you just came in and were like, look, guys, City is with you. City has your back. Yeah. Because one of the problems they have is like, look, if I arrest some...

uh clown or drunk or whatever like half the time um i'm i'm might both of us for both of those things i might uh get hurt but then someone might uh

record me like subduing the person after they do the crazy thing and so there's like a lot of bad incentives right now in the system and so you have to try and build a morale and say look guys like do the right thing for the city we'll have your back here here yeah because cops used to be high-fived you know and now and i i thank cops everywhere i go like i said cop and i got to say too a lot of them recognize me so then oh yeah yeah it's good feeling everywhere i go

Yeah, yeah, that is nice. And cops love comedy. Cops are the best crowds. They're good crowds. I got a PBA card because I killed him on a cop show. There you go. That must have felt great. It did feel good. He was like, just don't use it if this works. He goes, yeah, just don't use it if you have a child sex dungeon. I'm like, yeah, I don't think that would get me out of it. Child sex dungeon. Oh, you're one of us. Yeah.

I'm running a child sex dungeon. I'm like, not so fast, officer. I have this card. And there's definitely bad apples, but there's bad apples in everything. But this is bad apples where it could kill somebody. Yeah. No, Rock's got that great bit. Great bit. About, you know, it's kind of being a cop. It's like being a pilot. Yes. You kind of got to be perfect. Right, right. You know? Yeah, you want good ones. You want ones that have the right motivation, the right character, the right makeup. Yeah.

you know, like come in and then, you know, like if they're hopefully even making things better in their own neighborhood sometimes. Oh, yeah. What? Give me some peeves about like just general day to day peeves. What bothers you? I mean, it's usual New York stuff, man. I mean, like you, you you're out and about and I mean, sometimes things are happening, not happening. You're like, oh,

you know, I don't remember this trash pile being quite so big. Oh, yeah. A lot of trash piles in this town. And then when you're walking by a trash pile at night, you're like, here come the rats. It's going to run right over my foot every single time and you know it's coming. It's like a scene out of The Lion King, but it's just all rats running. They hold up a little rat. Yeah. The remake. Yes. A live action. Disney live action. Did you know Anthony Weiner at all?

I did not know Anthony. That was crazy. Come on, you were on that text thread. I was like, Anthony, don't do it, man. I know you've got a... Also, nice piece. I know you're proud. Yeah. I mean, it's like I do know some of these characters. And on a good day, I actually feel bad for a lot of the folks because there's a lot of...

I mean, the press does take pot shots at people in different ways. Who was it? Neil O'Donnell was the guy at MSNBC. He got a little carried away, I thought. With Wiener? Yeah. He just went at him so hard. I'm like, all right, the dude's already lost. Isn't it great when the names match up like that? You got Wiener with the big pick. Madoff. Madoff with your money. There's other ones I can't think of right now. Yeah. Shit. Sorry, I should have had a pick. P. Diddy? P. Diddle. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we'll get more. We'll come back. We'll be back. Yeah, yeah. We'll be back. He's work chopping. I swear I had one. I lost it. No, I'm with you. It's a sad story for sure. But it is crazy that he like rose from the ashes and then it just happened again. That was crazy. Yeah. You know, I mean, people are forgiving too. It's true. This is one of the things also. We do need to forgive. You're right. Yeah, yeah. Well, because I mean, we're all human and you see shit. Like if you look back on it.

a couple generations ago, adultery would end your career. And then post-Clinton, everyone's like, eh. And part of the reason why Trump is so strong is that the things that people are attacking him for, a lot of people look at it and say, eh, you know. Or like, you know, that's what rich people do or this and that. And folks are losing confidence in

the press in various ways. You know, it's like you look at the relationship with the media. I mean, shit. By the way, I also, I mean, I'm friends with a bunch of comedians. You know, I saw Shane Gillis just last week and like different comedians have run afoul of the machine in various ways. And then you guys know these people and you're like, oh, like what the hell's going on? Like who are they trying to cancel? Yeah.

You were a dude who came out in support of Shane when there was a lynch mob after him. So I'll tell you the story. And by the way, I did this with you guys too. I spent the day watching your bits and your comedy specials.

and you guys are funny and smart. It made me really happy to be here with you. So when the news hit about Shane Gillis, I also, first I was like, who the fuck is this guy? And then I started watching his clips and whatnot, and I was like, this guy's no malignant. This guy's like, you know, he's

He's like a... He's a chubby drunk. Yeah. He's like a dude from Central PA who's like... Yeah. Great dude. Just like trying stuff out. And a killer comedian. Yeah. I mean, he's... I mean, talk about an ascent over this last couple of years. Oh, yeah.

Um, I actually, he's got a scent. Uh, sorry. Smells great. Shane, you smell great. Um, so, uh, so I, I, at the time, and I, like, I was one of the people that was, you know, personally, um, uh,

insulted or attacked in the stuff that he was being fired for so I was like look if I can at least come out and say like this dude should not be fired for for this that's good good that takes balls as a personal and my team too at the time they were like you didn't even like because I was running for president at the time and I had like a team and I just I was like whatever guys I just like put it out there then and by the way even at the time I was like they're probably gonna fire him anyway because

from their standpoint, what had they really invested in him at that point? Yes. Next to nothing. So I was like... And they were hiring an Asian cast member as well, so I wonder if they felt added pressure. Of course, 100%. Maybe, it's a good point. They should be on the chopping block more than Shane, because you've never had an Asian? You've actually done a bad thing. He said a bad thing. To me, that's more...

I don't give a shit either way. I don't want anybody getting fired, but I'm just saying if you're comparing the two wrongs, to me not having an Asian is worse than saying a slur is a joke. Oh, it goes back to the fact that all these folks are...

you know it's like uh like no uh show's gonna be perfect no of course certainly no comedian it's a comedy show but like the for for a comedian in my mind it's like a comedian has to go way way way out of bounds uh in my mind because it's freaking comedy like if you start circumscribing what comedians can say yeah and i said this on bill maher one time i was like look like a comedian's job is not to tell us how to think comedian's job is just to entertain us and it's a hard job yeah so if

if you then like try and give them the responsibility of also uh telling you what to think it's like you know i mean like where the hell does that go it goes no place also context is super important he said it on a podcast trying to make a joke clip someone says something in a comedy club that's the context now if i'm saying that on the subway you might have a problem with me yeah also but also body of work and you just said like okay he is pr this is who he is you found one clip where he's not at his best where he's doing something not good but

he invested in actually looking this guy up. He invested time being like, no, this is, I think who this guy is. You can't judge someone by their worst moment and define them by that worst moment. It's fucking insanity. Yeah. Yes. A hundred percent. And it doesn't,

bear with me here, but it's like, they want to just take you down more than actually care about the justice of it. They don't care. That's what bugs me is like, it's one thing to try to save the world, but you're just doing it to ruin a person. You're not doing it to actually help. It's just like, Hey, let me get my name out there. Show that I took this guy down. I'm on the right side of history.

It's not about helping anybody or people's lives or feelings. It's just about taking someone down. That's what kills me. It's all fake. That's why I respect what Andrew did because he was like, let's have a conversation. Let's be forgiving. Because I don't know what party you identify with right now, but you were running as a Democrat and you don't see that...

forgiveness model to be something they subscribe to anymore you know yeah i mean it used to be the republicans were the party of kind of like you're in a lot of trouble and it kind of switched

You know? Yeah, totally. Like, I saw Bill Burr on Twitter once. Somebody called him a racist. And then a guy under it wrote, you know his wife's black. And the guy wrote, fuck you. And you're like, well, I thought you hated racism. So shouldn't you go, oh shit, never mind. One less racist on the planet. But you're like, damn it, I wanted to get him. How often on Twitter do you hear, that's a good point? I know, I'm just saying. That's not what that's for. My point is that he was trying to

accuse this guy of being a piece of shit right and when he was proven wrong he got mad but you should be like oh i hate racists great he's not racist but they don't they actually want to get you it's not about the racism you're right it's it's like uh you're trying to checkmate you and when they realize it's not checkmate they're like they flip the fucking board right you should be happy yeah against racism yeah i'd say 80 of its social media incentives because uh you know you do get

status and points for sticking it to someone. And I was trying to imagine, like, if you got rid of X, like, it's hard to cancel someone because... I hate X. Get rid of it. You know, it's like, how do you even do it? I mean, Twitter definitely has, you know, been a tool for folks who want to try and... It can spread. Try and ruin people. And by the way, it's not just people in entertainment. Academics...

I mean, there are multiple academics that I know who've had their careers ruined because they put something out on social media. And a part of it too is like, and this is like the messed up mechanics. It's like, well, then just like don't go on social media if you're one of these folks. But then some of the universities are like, oh, no, go on social media because we want you to be part of the conversation. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, et cetera, et cetera. Have you met Elon Musk? Have you hung out with him? Sure. He endorsed me in 2022. Oh, wow. I had a whole set of really fascinating endorsers in 2020. And did you have any time to hang out with him? Sure. I got a tour of SpaceX and hung out with him and Grimes. All right. What about Epstein? Epstein.

I missed that one. We would have all said yes to that plane ride, let's be honest. Before we knew, I mean. I mean, happily, that was before my time. Yeah, this is the soundbite he wants. Andrew Yang says, yes, he would have gone on Epstein's plane.

Before. I mean, I would have gone to P. Diddy's too. I'm just, you know, five years ago. Back then I was just a dude. It's a rapper party. You know, it's, what's funny is that I was telling Dave this, like when we're hanging out in Iowa, I was like,

Five years ago, I just bought a ticket to see you in Radio City, and I came out and hung out in Iowa together. How do you think we feel? We voted for you for mayor, and now you're here. And now you're like, oh, I voted for that guy? I think you should run again. I agree. Thanks, guys. Asians are having a moment. They really are. That's your bumper sticker. Yeah.

Andrew Yang. Asians are having a moment. Ali Wong. Joe Coy. I feel like this is the time. I think you're a New York guy. You speak to a lot of different types of New Yorkers. I think. Squid Game. Parasite. Oh, brother. This is getting worse. Those are Korean. I know it's Korean, but I'm saying Asian. Shogun is on TV. All right. You're digging deeper.

I'm just saying Asians are, this is your time, baby. I mean, I do have a bunch of friends who are getting more work than they do. That's all I'm saying. Strike while the samurai sword is hot. Yeah. We'll be right back.

I've never seen a silent say I regret coming here so much. No, I think we're on the same page here. Yeah. I mean, I do have a lot of friends who are on those shows. They're great shows. I don't see the problem with what I'm saying. Literally, I'm like watching them in a show and I'm texting like, hey man, you're great in this. I watched Shogun last night. I heard it's good. It's pretty good. It's like a Japanese Game of Thrones, I'd say. Hmm.

Yeah, Shogun's worth watching. I'm going to check it out. There you go. There's a lot of good stuff, man. It's tough. Oh, yeah, so much. I heard this John Wilkes Booth show is amazing. Really? I haven't seen it yet. Yeah, it's a great premise. It's about him on the run after shooting Lincoln. I mean, that's fucking good stuff right there. Were you worried about getting clipped? I mean, that's a fear of a politician. I mean, there was the occasional threat and then occasional law enforcement protection if the threat rose to a certain level.

Crazy people. Any slurs? You know, I mean, I didn't actually see some of the...

I would just get word from someone's like, hey, there's been a credible threat. So you're going to have like an extra layer of security like this period. The wife hates that. Yeah. Sometimes they wouldn't tell her because, I mean, she doesn't need to know that stuff. No, no, that's not going to help. It's weird. I remember when Obama won, there was that thing where like, fuck, I really hope he's going to be OK. It was like that scary moment. Then once after he was OK, I think there was like a moment where like, all right. I mean, you know. Yeah. I'm sure you're still nervous, but it's.

I mean, now, like, you know. Now you're fine. Yeah, now it's like...

I mean, you know, I'm just a... Just a procrastinating assassinator. I was supposed to do this four years ago. It slipped my mind. Yeah, well, Chappelle had that great joke and killed him softly, which is, you know, old as shit. It's probably a 1999 special, but he's like, I don't want to be a black president, so for protection, I'll have a Mexican vice president. Ain't that right, Santiago? Si! It was a great bit. But then we had a black president for two terms, and it was all fine. Yeah. Yeah.

I think. Maybe we just didn't know anybody, know or hear about any assassination attempts, but I think it was gravy. Everybody liked Obama. I feel like New York, too, is also like, you just don't think of it as like a place where you're going to get shot. I don't know. I hope not. Says John Lennon. Well, 1980, but you make a good case. So why do you think RFK is not getting Secret Service protection? Yeah, what's going on? He's a Kennedy.

No, I actually remember looking into this somewhat when I was a candidate. And they have thresholds and rules. Now, it could also be that they just don't want to give RFK protection. He could get assassinated. Yeah. They've had bad luck. He's had in his family. Rule of threes?

So I remember when I was running, the rules they set out, they told us were like no one gets any security until you're the nominee. Okay. And so we're like, all right, that's one threshold. Now in RFK's case, he's running as an independent, so there's no real nomination. And so what RFK is saying is, look –

anyone who polls above a certain threshold should qualify. And I think there have been polls that have put them above that threshold. It's pretty legit. And like, I'm, you know, I'm all for people, you know,

being able to campaign without fear for their safety. Um, but one of the reasons why I think that, and I, um, there'd probably be three things that come to mind for me as to why the government would resist. Number one is precedent, which is like any independent candidate who runs against a certain threshold to be like, Hey, now I get secret service. Uh,

Number two is it actually adds legitimacy to that person because if they're walking around campaigning and then their Secret Service rotating around, it seems like awfully presidential. Sure. And number three... Interesting. That protection layer is very, very expensive. I see. You're talking about hundreds of thousands of dollars a day. Yeah, who's paying for that? And so it would be a government expense. Damn. Wow. And so those are, I think, like the...

Or it could just be like, you know, they don't give a shit and they, you know, blah, blah, blah. Could you outsource it? Get a couple of migrants? Hey, here's a cool 50 if you, you know, stand near me. I have to say, we outsource everything else. Why not? These guys need work. Yeah. We'll pitch it. I don't know. But yeah, you know, I mean, I have people in common with RFK, you know, and I'm not an enormous fan of

um the two-party system delivering what we need so forward you know so if there is uh you know there's a case to be made for him to uh get protection especially considering his family history yeah agree who do you think he's pulling more votes from no i i've seen um

I've seen Trump. I've seen Biden. I've seen no effect. So at this point, it's a little bit of a guessing game, honestly. You're voting RFK, it sounds like. You know, I'm an anyone but Trump guy. And so anything I'm going to do is going to be to try and minimize the chance of Trump winning, because I think if Trump gets back in, it's a catastrophe, genuinely. You think he's going to win, though?

I think if the election is held today, he probably wins. Wow. Wow. There's a sound bite. It's funny. I mean, I just, first time he won, I didn't really believe he was going to win, but I remember being on the road enough, seeing people that really loved him, being like, I mean, people fucking love him. Yeah. I mean, you said like road comics, we see the country. I'd talk to people and I'd be like, wow, they fucking, being Phoenix, these people love him. You're talking about the cops, are they? Cops seem to love him.

So he's resonating for sure. I can give you the math case as to why I think he would win right now. Michigan? Yeah. So only six states are going to matter. It's Michigan, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Arizona, Nevada, Georgia. Oh, yeah. And you're thinking about your type of those states. But if you look at the numbers in those states, Trump is up in all of them right now except for Pennsylvania, which is a toss-up. Really?

And some of them... Well, Biden's got history there, you know. And some of them Trump's up significantly in. Like he's up by eight in one poll I saw in Michigan, eight in one poll I saw in Georgia. So you look at that landscape right now and Trump probably wins today. And so the question is,

Does that change between now and November? Joe's going to have a lot of money as a financial advantage. Does the money move voters in those states? The problem is that most people have made up their minds. About 7% of voters are genuine swing voters. And there are a bunch of people in that 7% who voted for...

for Trump and then Biden. And then now they're like, oh, what am I gonna do? - Oh, interesting. - And so those are the voters, but only in those six states. Where we are right now is essentially irrelevant. - Well, the left is in a weird spot because I feel like they're really zoning in on Trump with the court stuff and the fees and then maybe going to jail, but then they'll do a trans visibility day, and I think that hurts 'em. - On Easter. - On Easter, and I think-- - Yeah, but hasn't that been around forever?

Transvilla Visibility Day? Hasn't that been around for years? Yeah, yeah. It's just... Oh. It ordinarily just doesn't fall on Easter. Ah. Well, stuff like that, people go, and I don't give a shit either way, whatever the hell. I don't care, but I'm like...

That's going to hurt them. So stuff like that, I'm like, it's an election year, man. If you're trying to win, maybe don't do that. You want them to change the calendar? Well, don't do it on Easter, I'm saying. Do it on the day after Easter. I mean, to me, these issues are so fucking insignificant. I agree. I'm just talking about the people. I think that pissed off a lot of people. If you could sway half of that 7%,

You can win an election. That's what I'm saying. Like that, those little things add up and he's had other stuff like that. And it's like, Hey, here he goes again, bro. That's, you know, I'm from Louisiana. I hear this shit. And going full circle. Uh,

You know who I think speaks to that 7%? Comedians, genuinely. - They don't put us on, we're nobody, we're not important, we're idiots. - I think it's the first time we've ever talked politics on the podcast. We try to stay apolitical here, so I apologize. - For good reason, but one thing I'm saying, so, you know, it's politics, blah, blah, blah. In my mind now, it's more about, like, do you believe in institutions or not?

And what happens is a lot of people who do not believe in institutions actually believe in their favorite comic. They like them. They want to show up for them. I mean, I see this for different comedians. But don't you think it's a problem when you watch Late Night and every single Late Night host is doing the same joke with the same point of view and...

You know, I think there's a need for escapist comedy, too. Definitely. Well, that's what I'm saying. And a lot of that stuff happens on the road and on YouTube. So that's one of the things. Like, you're the institutions. The institutions include, frankly, the media networks where the talk shows you're talking about are on every night. Yeah. And then there's this whole other...

universe uh and i think a lot of the folks we're talking about in the seven percent do not listen to tv network abnc um they're listening to podcasts and everything else like your podcast or whomever by the way you know that's how i came up too because i'm running for president it's 2019 um you know cable networks essentially want nothing to do with me so how did i come up

It was Rogan. It was Sam Harris. It was different podcasts. And then I became a big enough of a thing where then networks were like, okay, let's have this guy on. Wow. You need credits to get on the network. It's a weird thing where you're like, you need credits to come on, but you're a credit. How do I get the thing to get the thing? Everyone wants you to have a thing. Oh, it's very circular. And for me, it was wild. And so thank you, Yang Gang, if you're listening to this. But

But so what happened with me was I got enough support in terms of polling and money where then some of the major networks were like, well, like, let's have this dude on because he, you know, made the third debate, made the fourth debate, like outlasted half a dozen political brand names.

And I look back on that time too and it was funny is that that campaign was a race against oblivion all the time because as soon as you get below a certain threshold, then they kick you off the debate stage, the networks will have nothing to do with you and you disappear. Right.

And so there was a joke with me and my team where I was like the grim reaper of presidential candidates where after I pass you you die And as soon as I pass on one of the polls they would drop out like the next week like there's a joke It's like it's all fun and game until Andrew Yang passes you in the polls Oh, so I'd like creep along and if you remember that cycle there were 24 candidates in that field including fucking Bill de Blasio Wow

Like I ran into him. You got cocky, that guy. I ran into him. And you know, so it's like. He was hated in New York and he was like, I should run for president. We're like, no, no, no, you don't understand. We don't like you. Yeah. So there was a massive field. Yeah.

And then I was, you know, one of the massive field and I just kept marching up. But a lot of that was podcasts. And so there's like this universe and there's unfortunately this. What was the biggest bump that you first noticed? We were like, holy shit, this is real. Yeah.

I mean, after Rogan, then I would get recognized on the street. Yeah. And that was YouTube Rogan. Yeah. That was that was clearly like a massive like momentum boost and campaign changer, really. And we started raising real money. That was early 2019. And then I ended up making the first two debate stages, probably in large part because of

Yeah, well you were a numbers guy, and I think we got to come back to that a little we need some data I think I feel like we're getting a little wishy-washy code everything and that's a season some analytics Yeah, you know I'm in the camp. We just want shit to work. Yeah, all problems like you know Whatever the numbers say is gonna make the situation better. Let's do that and You know the Democratic Party sometimes will be like oh, that's awesome. It's like oh

not so much anymore. You guys have a whole other set of things that are animating you that really are not necessarily numbers driven or data driven and the rest of it. The Republican Party too, by the way, used to have a bunch of folks who are essentially moderate business types who are into that approach to things. And then, you know, that's kind of...

gotten squeezed out. So I'm with you. Like we just, you know, math. Let's just fix shit. Like make America think harder. Let's just fix shit. 42% of the people who supported me in 2020 weren't Democrats. Wow. Because they were just looking at it being like this guy. This guy just seems like a business guy that, you know, reminds me of people that I've worked with. Yeah. Like, you know. And you're a normal guy. You don't seem like a swindler like some of these hucksters out there.

I wonder if it's weird. I wonder if conservatives are more open-minded in that regard because do you think if you ran on the Republican ticket, would you have that kind of favorability from the left? It's funny. I was in Alabama not that long ago. It's probably a little bit like your life. But this –

Clearly a conservative guy comes up to him and is like, Mr. Yang, I don't agree with you on a whole hell of a lot, but you got a set of balls on you, sir, and I want to just shake your hand. And I was like, oh. So there's like a conservative camp that's just like,

I'm fine with Yang. He seems like a sensible business guy. And there was a Fox viewing mom who said something that really stuck with me where someone just interviewed her on Fox and said, hey, which of the Dems would you vote for? And she was like, Yang, because he's the only one who doesn't seem like he's judging me. And that's like a lot of what's going on in America right now. Elitism. Where they feel like the Democratic Party is the judgey party of...

Democrats are like my mom. Yeah. That's interesting. I feel that. I'm from Louisiana and all my relatives are pretty red and they feel the same way. They're like, these fucking people on Capitol Hill and Hollywood and boopity boop. And you're like,

Yeah, it's not all of them, but that's what they think and they feel judged. And the problem is that you just have like two sides of this coin. And so for each of them to just be like, oh, what about those people? What about those people? It's like whatever they are, I'm on the opposite side. And so you wind up in these two camps and then the problems get unaddressed. Because of cable news, though, don't you think that's the big part is like the networks like Fox gets such crazy viewership.

Whatever you get your news, it's now an algorithm geared to how you already think. So how are you going to get out of that mindset? Right. Yeah. I write about this in Ford as well. So you have the polarization of cable news, the nationalization of news because you got rid of 2000 plus local papers. Local papers used to be straight up the middle. You guys remember growing up in Louisiana, some local paper, non opinion, opinion.

Yeah, because it's hard to be ideological about high school sports and the bridge needing repairs and other shit. That's what I want to see, though. Really, really opinionated high school sports. This guy stinks. Right. And then you get rid of that, and then it gets replaced by your social media feed and cable news. Echo Chamber. Getting divided into either camp. And then, by the way, these cable news channels, too, their business model is...

not humming in some ways too. So they're driven by their own economics to be like, oh, we gotta be a little more sensationalist. - Yes, sure. - And aggressive. And anytime they do something that challenges their viewers,

They fucking change the channel. Right. Like I'm not here to be challenged. I'm here to get that red meat I want or that blue meat I want. So they're incentivized to stay extreme. Yes. And you have, so you have media putting us in the corners. You have social media putting us in the corners. And then the political incentives. And I don't want to get too nerdy on this shit. Nerd out, baby. But what is the approval rating of Congress right now? Not good. It's got to be pretty low. Lower than 20%?

Yeah, it's like 15%. Maybe it was 12% in one. What is the re-election rate for current members of Congress? Over 80%. Oh, is that right? 94%. Whoa! Numbers, baby! This is good stuff! Yeah, it's a better win rate than the Jordan Air Chicago Bulls. Wow!

So one of the jokes I... But they're really the Washington Wizards, essentially. Oh, and so... The bullets. So I joke with people. It's like, hey, how many of you run a business? Like, what would your customers be like if you were to piss off eight out of ten of them and then change nothing? Great point. Great point. And that's the way most people feel about politics now. It's like, oh, these fucking jokers, blah, blah, blah. And it's because the system has been built up in a way that insulates them from us, which

And that's why people are so fucking angry. And so you have the polarization of the electorate and then media and then social media. It's going to get worse, not better. By the way, I'm literally giving a TED talk on this shit at TED in April. Like the actual TED talk. I thought you meant right now. I mean, it's a joke. It's like, welcome to my TED talk. But I'm actually going to TED and giving this talk. Great. So keep an eye out. I'll be dressed differently and on a fancy stage. You'll get the mic, this mic, this one? I'll...

do whatever the mic they give me, I'm just gonna roll in and bang this thing. - There you go, well as a guy who does the roll, I think we think of the left and the right as this long line, it's actually kinda horseshoed. - Yeah, totally. - And they're kinda meeting, the psychos are meeting in the middle and they don't even realize it, they're the same people, they're just different sides. - There's so many fucking Bernie Trump voters out there. - That's what I'm saying. - Like if Bernie had won in '16,

he beats Trump. Trump beats Hillary, but if you had Bernie in there, Bernie would have beaten Trump. Do you think Bernie, if he beat Biden, would have beaten Trump last time? This last time, I think in 20, it was Biden. I was there. I literally was next to a

Joe and Bernie, you know, during the debates and on the campaign trail. I think it was Biden's time in 2020. And you guys might not know this, whatever. Like I was campaigning for a guy named Dean Phillips was running against Joe Biden in the Democratic nomination because I was like, look,

A 55-year-old CEO of Talenti Gelato is a much better foil for Trump than Joe is this time. And so it's funny. It's like energy coalesces around candidates in different cycles. I thought 16 was Bernie's time. But the fact that the DNC, frankly, in my opinion, kind of shoved it to Hillary. Oh, yeah.

I don't think it's just your opinion. I think that's how it was. I still get texts from Bernie, too. Whoa, he can text? No, the mailing list. Big print. Oh, okay, okay. I have a question. What you just said about running into that guy in Alabama and he meets you and you tell this story. I believe that happened to you, but how often are you watching TV and they're doing a debate and they're like...

a man came up to me in West Virginia and he had one leg and you're like this didn't fucking happen like how much of that's made up

I hope not all of it. Like for me, I didn't make shit up. And one of the things, you know, it's like I tell a story. It's like, I mean, I don't know that guy's name. I could probably like find out. And I'm going to be back in Birmingham, Alabama this June for something slightly different. How much do politicians make stuff up?

I genuinely don't know. Like I didn't make shit up. There was enough real shit to go on. So it wasn't necessary. But I do think that folks distort

and stretch the truth sometimes for like a good story. Well. And you know, which by the way, it's like on one hand again, you're a human being. Yeah. It's like, you know, if you say, hey, I did some boring shit, it's not a good story. But like, hey, I did some boring shit and then there were bullets flying and I saved the baby and like the rest of it. Well, I know people change. People,

People evolve, but you see a lot of politicians where they say a thing and then they cut to them 10 years ago and they're saying the exact opposite. And you're like, well, now I don't know who to believe. And they go, well, I've evolved. And you're like, you just happen to evolve with the way the wind is blowing? Come on! I mean, how many people were against gay marriage?

And then when gay marriage was like, maybe we should let this happen. They're like, oh, you know, I was always love gays getting married and I'm gay and my dad's gay and all that. You're like, well, what about that whole thing? So then that's why we don't believe politicians a lot. Well, this is sort of my mission in life, by the way.

is that politicians respond to whatever incentives are around them. That's what I'm saying. So during that period when it was not cool to be pro-gay marriage, it's like, were some of them privately for gay marriage? Of course. But then have the balls to say that. But there was like... I would think most of them were like, who gives a shit?

Why is this an issue? Like this is, you know, between two other people that have nothing to do with my life, you know? So one of the, and this is something I do. I mean, I've lived a version of it. I've written about it somewhat. So you have these political figures and then they have all these incentives that are not great. And then they have a team around them.

And the team around them has the incentives taken up to 11 because they're all like, look, I have to get a job after you. I see. And so they'll be like, here are the guardrails. Don't do this. Don't do that. You do this. And what's interesting is that a lot of political figures...

They probably start out in a certain way being like, you know, I'm going to do my own thing. And then when they go off script and then they get, you know, shivved by let's call it the press or whomever, then they'll be like, oh, that sucked. And their team's like, yeah, I told you so. Don't do that again. And, you know, these are experts in telling you where to step and where not to step. Guys, it was so wild. So check it out. Random man run for president.

No one gives a shit, whatever. Doing my thing. And then after Rogan, after we get this momentum behind us, then money starts coming in. And then this small army of consultants shows up. And then the team is a little bit like, okay, there are these consultants. And part of you is like, well, fuck these consultants. Who the hell are they? But then some of them you actually kind of need. Because let's say you were...

me, you raised $40 million, you're trying to become president in this democratic race. You know what you've never done before? Buy ads in New Hampshire.

And so there's a consultant who's like, okay, we have the media relationships. Here's what you buy. And then here's the ad firm and the consultant we recommend for this. And you're not going to be like, fuck you. I'm going to figure out what TV networks. So obviously you have to be like, well, I need

Some of them. Right, right. Same with comedy. We got to cut clips. We don't have to do any of that shit. Had to edit video. Before we were here, we were talking about business stuff. We're complete imbeciles. I have a question, though. I mean, you talk about raising $40 million. How many people are running? How much money do we waste on elections every year? Is there a party that's like, man, if we just...

you know, had less people, we could do something good with all this money. I don't know. Yeah. So to the extent that there's a group that wants that to happen, I'd say forward, which I'm the co-chair of is in that camp. There are other organizations like unite America represent us, which a bunch of Hollywood types are involved with that are trying to get money out of politics because the money's killing us. Yeah. And,

Over 10 billion dollars is going to get spent in 24 beating each other up. And you know who's going to benefit? TV networks. Because they're going to spend all that stuff. And then I joke with people. It's like, how much is going to get spent bringing us back together after? It's like nothing. It's like, what else could you do with 10 billion? A whole lot. By the way, a lot of it too, it's like it's negating anyway. I mean, there are some people who are literally just donating to both sides because it's like I'm covered no matter who wins. I mean, like talk about a waste. Right.

So one of the diseases of this is that you're going to need money to disrupt this system. And so when I talk about the 40 million, like, you know,

Almost half a million Americans donated. I think I was on average. It was like 39 bucks to give us a chance to compete. You're welcome. Yeah. Thank you for that, Mark. It was all Mark. Yes. I want to see receipts, Mark. All right. I can check that shit, actually. Check it. Check it. I can call my person and be like, hey, can you look up his name? But...

We want to do this on air. So you're trying to... And I will say too, one reason why I think some folks got behind the campaign is that for creatives like yourselves, it's getting...

worse and worse, honestly. And AI is going to make it much, much worse too. And one of the reasons why I think some people got behind me was that there was like this vision I had of this... Truck driving. Yeah, of this more advanced economy where people have

Just some level of resources natively and then a lot of it ends up going into arts creativity culture philanthropy like blah blah blah and and and the rest of it Because right now you have this winner-take-all economy It's getting harsher and more punitive and less human and it's just squeezing people out more and more and you guys have already in my view I've already reached a point where you're gonna like you're gonna be fine and I

We'll see. What a load off. You know what I mean? Like you guys are on your way. And I say this mainly because you guys are fucking talented. You guys are really good at what you do. Really smart. Did not expect this to go this way. I'm uncomfortable. Yeah, same. I should have donated more. Genuinely, I'm a fan and you have a lot of other fans out there and you're going to be great and gravy.

um but this is a harsher and harsher environment for creators in different people coming up i mean we think you know mark and i got very fortunate and one of the reasons we did break went the way we didn't and you know we'd better ourselves we did youtube and stuff but the over saturation you know how people break now i think it's going to be it's going to be tougher for the next generation of comics but they'll find a new way same no no same same i mean it is true i think it was bill burr actually said to shane something and it's true for you guys too he's like

you're going to be fine because you're funny. You know, it's probably true of just about anyone that like if they're genuinely... They'll find new ways to break through. Funny, they'll get there. But you're also right that you wouldn't necessarily wish like, you know, this...

Period on folks behind you. I think about all the time like I mean, I've had a crazy wild ride But and I imagine like a younger version of me trying to like do the same stuff. It's like I don't know if that shit You know because like times times gonna change I look at my kids I'm you know, I'm a parent and sometimes people ask me it's like hey, do you want your kids to be?

do the same thing that that you do and i'm just like uh you know i'm not sure that would be wise be an architect um so you you guys are on the other side of it but like one of the things and i'll actually come back to you guys with this is that um i'm going to i'm still grinding away and trying to humanize the economy in different ways and i'm working on something that's good for creators um so i'll i'll come back to you guys when it's uh okay well you know did you see that study where it said uh

AI, if you didn't graduate high school, it'll only affect you like 9%. If you graduate high school, it'll affect you 19%. If you graduated from college, it'll affect you like...

38 because that's the jobs is going to take those college level jobs you know we need plumbers we need uh and that's just that's just very hard to automate exactly you know like can you imagine trying to get a robot hvac repair person impossible impossible but like a robot accountant like pretty doable easy easy and that was a one of those jewish robots yeah they don't work saturday

Do you guys want to work on any bits and run them by Mr. Yang to punch it up? I don't know. I'll do one. Give me one. You go one. I'll do one too. Okay, I had one. This happened a while. I don't know if I've ever done this. It probably happened a while back. So this is a joke that happened. I ran into a friend...

He saw me at, you know that friend you hate running into, but you wanna do? You know who it is too, I'll tell you all fair. It's not you. But I run into this guy, he goes, "I saw you on a date having an ice cream cone, like a little homo." And I was like, first of all, I was on a date with a woman. Second of all, how homophobic are you that you can't enjoy ice cream? And third, how gay would he think I was if he knew I was really eating sorbet? But I wanna do a thing about the idea that you can't, you're so homophobic you can't enjoy dessert.

Like no sweets? That's how close you are to being gay? Right, right. Like you're at a restaurant, they're like, we have a lovely tiramisu this evening. He's like, nice try. Ah!

Something like that. Yeah, and by his logic, Halloween is the pride parade. It's all candy. The whole holiday is based on candy. That's funny. It's all sweets. There's something there. All right. I'll try. I'm going to try it again. That's funny. It's sweets. Is every kid gay? I mean, what are we doing here? You give a woman a box of chocolates. Are they a lesbian? I guess it's because of the licking, the comb. It's the licking. Because a banana, he might do the same thing. So it might not be sweets. But it lasts longer if you lick it.

Uh-oh, that's the gayest thing I've ever heard. I don't know. Do you got anything, Mark? Yeah, that's funny. Mine's a little darker, so buckle up there, Yangy. So I was thinking, my friend, she's very new age, hippy-dippy, holistic, and she's got two kids, and all they eat is free-range organic chicken. But all the kids do is play video games. So I thought it was interesting that kids have become cooped up, whereas...

They used to be free range, and now chickens are free range where they used to be cooped up. We flipped chickens and kids. Yeah, like cannibals. Something about cannibals. They're like, fuck this kid. This kid never moved. That's where I was going to go. Kids are basically veal now. Kids are veal. Yeah. They were just shoving food and chemicals down their throat, and they don't move. They have no muscle mass. It's like veal. But I went pedophile.

So I want one of these elite pedophiles have a menu. Like, I want the free range kids who have been running around and riding bikes. I don't want the fucking fat kid. You know, if I'm going to do some diddling. I would lose fuck a fat kid. I wouldn't say fuck a fat kid. Diddle, squeeze, molest. I don't want that fat kid. Yeah, he's pumped full of chemicals and cereal and junk food and no muscle. This guy's going to run for president again, you guys. What the fuck are you doing? I'm doing a bit. I'm doing a bit.

Thoughts, Yang? Andy? Anything? How about those next? I think there's something there. Okay, maybe cannibal is softer. Cannibal is kind of fun too, but pedophile is more likely. Yeah, cannibals are pretty rare.

They're rare. Although that might be the next thing we all have to get behind. Hey, my cousin's a cannibal. I'm pro-cannibal. I'm cannibal tolerant. We have to apologize to Armie Hammer. He'll be back. What happened with that guy? He's out. He's out. He's done. He's done. Well, check out the book, Forward by Andrew Yang. I'm going to read it. I'm looking forward to this. Look at the audio. It's got a lot of good names in it. You've got Cuban, Mark Cuban. Hey. Van Jones. All right. Karish Fisher. Look at that. He can get it.

You like him? He's sexy. Those little glasses. He's a hot black guy. He's good on air. I like that guy. Well, yeah. Oh, you're doing some club. That stuff's in the past. Oh, man. Anything new? Houston Improv. Irvine Improv. You're really doing comedy. Cobbs Comedy Club. Denver Comedy Works.

works. Look at you. I didn't know those dates were still up there, but they were a minute ago. We're one in the same. We could be doing the same gigs. We are one in the same, guys. These politicians, they're taking our jobs. You have little to fear. I know. I heard your police junk. Ha ha ha!

I heard Mike Huckabee tried stand-up. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, that's funny. My friend, do you know Baratunde? Yeah. He used to run my show back there. Sure, Thurston. Great guy. He told me Huckabee, very likable on stage, and they don't have a lot in common. I could see that. But the bits weren't great, he said, but you know.

I wonder if Trump, if he loses, he could just pivot in a stand-up and do arenas. Oh, easy. Yeah. Trump and friends? Oh, my God. Bring out a couple of... That's pretty much what he's doing now, guys. He kind of is. I guess that's true. And he's got merch. He's already got merch. He's got all. He doesn't make up killing. Trump is basically Bert. He's basically Bert Kreischer. Playing big venues, he's selling a ton of merch. Yeah, good point. Fully bloated tour. Yeah.

All right. Is this me? Yeah, it's Mark. All right. Hey, I'm in Buffalo, New York, Syracuse, Minneapolis, Madison, Wisconsin, Bloomington, Evansville, L.A., Coachella, Victoria, B.C., Vancouver, Royal Oak, Michigan, all the swing states, Fort Wayne, West Palm, Boston, Pittsburgh, Seattle, Spokane, Philly, MarkNormanCounty.com. Check us out on Punch-Up. Get the book. BodegaCatWhiskey.com. I got nothing on the schedule right now. I just burned an hour with the –

Special out July 9th on a major streamer. I wasn't supposed to say where it is, but guys, if you listen, you know where it's going to be. Can we bleep that? No, it's already out. It was in the Shane episode. Great. But I will be in Atlantic City in June, June 22nd with Chris DiStefano. That's going to be a fun one. Hell yeah. We're competing against Frankie Valli, so come see us. I know. I'd rather see Frankie Valli. He's good. He's good. I already lost it.

So you go see Sambo. Oh, and he keeps putting this picture up because he wants us to show it. Matt Salakius took this picture of Andrew Yang. You got everybody. You got Yang, Rihanna, Kanye. We had Robert Smigel on last week, and he just pulls up a picture, and Smigel goes, oh, I know that. And he goes, I took it. He's taking everybody. Oh, yeah. Matt gets around.

Yeah. No Bomback. Yeah, get around. Got everybody. Everybody. But yeah, see us on the road. Buy Bodega Cat at bodegacatwhiskey.com. We're basically sold out of our first batch, which is insane. We love you guys. And we might be legal at this point in New York now. Hopefully. Maybe we'll throw this in. If not now, soon, very soon. But yeah, buy Andrew's book.

Is it on Audible, too? Yeah, yeah. I spent a number of hours dictating that thing. Ugh. Wow. Yikes. Check it out. You can go to 1.5x, 2x, whatever. Oh, there you go. And run for mayor again, man. Yeah, would you please? Run for something. You know, if I do, you guys are going to have to come campaign. We'll open. We'll do schtick for you. We'll do a fundraiser. I'll do the free-range pedophile bit. Oh, my God. Out of the gate.

I'll do the sucking cock ice cream chunk. Yes. We'll have you. Can't lose then. Can't lose. We love you guys. Thanks for listening. Thank you, Andrew Yang. Comedy. Good to be here. Thanks, guys.