39 - Super Guys
01:15:13 Share

Sir Mix-a-Lot, welcome to the podcast. Hi. Holy moly, mother of babies. Mother of babies. Oh my god, I gotta get a ranch water. How do we look? Everything looks good. Everything looks good right now. Everything looks good. I can't wait for all of these to break. Something's gonna go terribly wrong. The IRS comes and arrests bad. Can the IRS arrest people? I don't know, I'm sure. I think it'll find people. That was a solid ranch water. Oh, f***.

Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous. Brandon. That guy's fucking ridiculous. Donut. That's harder to rhyme, but he's a really nice guy. Welcome to Unsubscribe. Hey, guys. Thanks for watching the Unsubscribe podcast. Make sure wherever you're listening or watching, whether it's on YouTube, Castro, Spotify, Apple, Google, Amazon, Podbean, Stitcher, or...

That's all of them. Please leave a comment, like it, thumbs up it, give it a rating of five stars, whatever you do. It helps the podcast out immensely. And Donut and Eli will be very happy if you do that. And we want to make Donut and Eli happy today. Yeah. Five stars on everything and a comment if there is possible because we need to be at the top. Donut, say something motivating. Come on.

And that's where the, you come, that is. Come subscribe. Yay. Hi everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Batty streams, Eli double fap and myself donut. We have new gear that works and the audio is not going to fly up. It's really cool. Look, take that one too. Those two, three replaced with the word butterflies. Butterflies.

No, we're going to take that one out now, boy. We got a new mixer, and I hope it works. Dude, we got like every... Okay, first off, we're going to go over the store. I don't know. We probably did in Vegas. We always literally delete that. Did we say we were going to do something in Vegas? No, but when we have a podcast, I literally forget about what was said on said podcast like immediately. It's gone. It's gone.

I just seen the ones. I was like, why is there a bunch of ones in the last podcast for comments? Yeah. I was like watching. It's like, get rid of bad. He was like, I'm a dickhead, but this is Larry. His name is Brandon. He's a ridiculous guy.

Oh, can you do that for this podcast? Just put, just say, do this Brandon. Just like put that where bad he is. And when you introduce him, it's like, we're this, we have Brandon streams and Eli double taps. You guys are rude. We expect, but donut.

We still use Batty's house even though he's been kicked off the podcast. I'm just gonna be sitting in the corner. Do you guys need a fourth? Can I be a guest, guys? Like, we can just bring it back, you know? The team. Batty, shut the fuck up over there. Why are you speaking again?

Get out of your house. I got to go sit on my front porch. Just waits outside. But the new one we found out with Matt's episode, Batty thought it was me that just double pressed the button. Because you did, though. You can see it on the video.

I did not double push the button. I never double... Your Eli double tapped the record button. I want to see this video. You don't even watch the video footage. I watch every one before they go live. The old ones? Yes, every single podcast. Is that always added when I'm always like... All the old footage I used to upload.

Patty's lying, everyone. I watched every bit of the old footage. I double check all of it because I'm like, why is it broken? Because you can see us all on camera. I still think I see it because you single tapped it and then you're like, good. And then it was like counted to eight and it was like, and done. Yeah, but you literally went boop, boop.

I don't know. We'll figure it. We'll just agree to disagree. We're not going to figure it out. We deleted all the footage. Yeah, we did because it's starting to take up a lot of space. It's so much space. Thankfully, we have like two terabytes of fucking footage on our Dropbox. Dropbox is like, don't worry about that.

And Dropbox was like, hey, man, stop. I'm like, okay. Sorry. But now we got all the cameras. We got a wide angle. Donut looking sexy on that one. All of them are the same. So it's going to make Fluck. And big shout out to Fluck for being a champion and doing. Party Fluck. Is it Fluck? How do you spell his name? It's F-L-U-C-K. Can we say that in the first five minutes? Fluck. Yeah. That's close. You better Flucking believe it.

Fuck yeah, bro. Fuck yeah, bro. That's a t-shirt. We'll just say, fuck yeah. Oh, no. Unsubscribe. Imagine us making merch. That would be cool. We talked about that on a podcast, too. Yeah. We're working on it. We actually are. We have all the paperwork done with Bunker. We just got to sit down. Yeah. Yeah. Blame him. The guy that came on in episode 34. Right.

It's definitely his fault, not this shit show that magically goes together somehow. But positive note, we got lights, we got all this, everyone looks happy, and we got some exciting stuff coming. Stop it. Exciting stuff coming. It's way better. There we go. That's pre-IV donut. Yeah. Post-IV donut. Where's our IV guy this time? Did you mean to just stare at one of the cameras two episodes ago during Tim's?

Oh, no, did I? Bro, the comments are just like, yo, Donut just tuned out. You just checked out. Your eyes just glazed over. You even blink. You just stared at the close camera. Tim's talking and you're just like. It's like you're looking. It feels like you're looking through. You're going to just come through the monitor. And everyone's like, yo, is he okay? You had a disassociate moment. Hardcore. It was hard.

I was like, everyone's tagging this time stamp of like 1048, 1048. Donut, is he okay? Donut, what happened at 1048? Donut, are you there? Does Donut have PTSD? Did I have a PTSD moment? It looked like you did. It looked like you were back on the block running missions as a police officer and just checked out for five minutes. Sorry, guys, for having a PTSD moment there. I got to go back and watch that now. It's good. I was like, did you do this on purpose? You were staring straight at the lens. It was just like.

I just like that Fluck had the thought to be like, "Donut." Tim's talking, but "Donut." He should have just slowly pushed it in that time. It just made it black and white. Or just do like Vietnam combat footage over my... And back to Tim talking about Pokemon. This is great. Oh man.

Also, something new. Cody, what do we got here, bud? Oh, yeah. We've never had this before. It's Ranch Water. What is Ranch Water? It's our sponsor. Sponsor's a loose word. The word. We have no sponsors yet. Just the fake ones. Ranch Water, everyone. Carbock Ranch Water. It'll make you cum. Oh, God. It'll make you cum.

I don't know. I would love a pro. If you had a beer that made you come, you have a very highly successful beer. Yeah, that's true. Like you. Okay. But no, we got to talk about this now. You can't just start that sentence and not go in it. Are we talking like you drink a can, then you come or is it like, oh yeah, it's like, we got to talk about how big your cans. Cause if people are done after, no, you're sensitive after that first, you're like, you tell your beer to stop. You're like, it's good. Just stop. Just stop. It's,

I should have peed first. I got to pee. I'm sorry. Go. Go pee. I'll be back. Oh, Goldberg. Oh, yeah. We did that yesterday. We have so many times. Like, yeah. Can you just drink closer to the mic? I want people to hear it. No, I want. And yes, he does make that sound, unfortunately, when he drinks. Yeah. Oh, my God.

I'm so excited to see how this sounds. I know. It's going to be a good one. It's like it's all broken, fucked up. I'm like, damn it. We spent all that money. I got the video of us at least attempting to make it work, though. So see, we're good.

just guzzling. We're dehydrated. So yesterday was fine. What did we do yesterday? We had, what's his company called? The minigun? DeGroot Tactical. DeGroot. DeGroot Tactical. Yeah, DeGroot. DeGroot. Yeah. They came out with a minigun in his Tesla, which he drove down to the ranch somehow. James. How the fuck did he get his Tesla down that range? I don't know.

Like our Raptors have kind of a difficult time. It's just bouncing. You're all over the fucking place. And this dude drove a Tesla down Rocky. Like we're talking like six inch drops at times. Just like how did his bumper stay at

It was, I mean, like, and James is a good dude. James is the owner of that company. And his story is the most hilarious one because he's talking about, like, oh, I was like, how did you get into this? He literally was like, oh, I wanted to build suppressors when I was little. So...

He was like, dad, get an SOT so I can build suppressors, get an FFL and everything. So the dad started an FFL and SOT so James could do what he wanted. So then James is first. He's like, oh shit, I can have full autos. So he got an M60 for his very first.

So he went from a 9mm to an AR-15 to an M60. And then the next gun. Guess the next gun he bought after an M60. Because you're not going to. Is it a minigun? No, he went with, you remember the 30 Mike Mike anti-tank guns that you need a motor to operate? The four barrel anti-aircraft shit? Yeah, that was his, after the M60, that was his. Does he still have it? I don't know. I hope so.

The thing's fucking. What the fuck? Yeah, he's just a fool. And then he was like, I ain't building miniguns. Hey, James, why did you only bring the minigun, asshole? Weird. Why didn't you bring the eight ton? Why didn't you mount it to the top of your Tesla? Could you imagine a Tesla eight ton? Sorry, I got the batteries. Like, let's go. So we did that. And then he started building miniguns. And that's all he does now. Who does he build miniguns for? For the people that can afford them.

Hmm. So, okay. If you have an SOT, he'll fucking build you one. SOT, destructive license. Or just the standard. Sorry, that's a firearms light. That's just a standard. It's just an SOT because it's just an automatic. We were talking about it yesterday. You don't need any other special license to own a minigun. There's no people. I guess Brandon had talked to him about this. Did you hear that they have pre-banned miniguns and those you can transfer?

Really? Yeah. You can just transfer them with your $200 tax stamp. A minigun. Because it's a pre-band. Yeah. Which is amazing. But, dear God, the price difference between... So, James, those miniguns are $80,000, I think. Oh, that's it. So, it's an 80-gram 4762 minigun. Guess how much a pre-band is. How much? $500,000. Huh.

That's without the ammo. Yeah. So, okay, my question. Yeah, but that's not like, why did he make it portable? You can't shoot that.

I like this is the man that just posted videos. And why would he do this? And then literally every post on Instagram yesterday was like, ah! Listen, but listen, like, where is the... Usually it's for helicopters. Okay. Those are built for helicopters. Yeah, I know they're meant to be mounted and so you can do that, but... He just did that because it's also people will buy it just for that little determining factor. God, I wonder when people have blown up trying to like, just trying to... Yeah.

Oh yeah, the real rounds. I'm talking about the real rounds, not blanks. So everyone, if you see somebody shooting a minigun standing up and like the casings are shooting, it looks cool as fuck and they're just stable, that's because they're shooting blanks. There's nothing to them. Nothing. It's just a heavy gun. There's no recoil. It's just blanks. Now when you put in the real 7.62 rounds, we found that it is a completely different case on the recoil. Like

you're getting like 30 20 to 30 rounds and that gun is whipping you around and that's like big strong matt best like with a power stance ready for racing racing and it's still like and you're like oh that's terrifying it's just the power is i mean you're doing fucking 50 rounds of 762 in a second it was scary it was matt's not a little person he was like

He was stationary and his feet were sliding back. Yeah, you see his thighs. I was just like, his thighs are bracing. I was staring at Matt's muscular thighs. Yeah, I was like, oh, he's bracing for this. And he's like, brr. I was like, oh. But I mean, it was still like the gun was out there. Everyone got around. Goldberg came out. Fucking. Bill Goldberg was out there. When Goldberg says to call him Bill, I didn't know what to do. You still were calling him Goldberg. It's not your name. You can't call him Bill. I'm like, Bill, what's up? And then I hear Batty. It's like.

Go, Bernie! Let's go. You don't just call.

The WCW, WWF wrestler Goldberg Bill. You don't call him Bill. I have an Uncle Bill. You don't call Goldberg Bill. You don't. It's awkward for me. Dude, Benji. My buddy Benji. Yeah, yeah. Benji from video game high school does other cool camera guy stuff. You may know him as Games Dean. Games Dean. Huge. He is, by hands down, the biggest wrestling nerd I've ever met. Yeah, like...

legit nerd he's the one that would do he did backyard wrestling he also like goes back and watch he lives fucking wrestling ever since he was little he'd do the ultimate warrior paint anytime he could to go to school he would just do that he had like the stuffed animals the posters and he still was that person who loves fucking wrestling so he when he came up i was like oh yeah come to the range uh bill's gonna be there and he's like bill bill i was like goldberg and he's like what the

And then Darnell was like, yeah, we went out and drank. And then he had to wake up. And he was hungover. And then I was like, walked in to wake up Benji. And he was like, hey, we got to get up. We got to go range. Benji just set up like Undertaker. He's like, done. And he like walked in the shower.

Darnell was like, it was like a GTA character. He's just like, ready? His clothes instantly changed. He was like, let's go. We got to go now. Okay, we're going now. But he asked Goldberg for that picture. Of him getting picked up? Yeah, yeah. Well, he didn't ask for that. He was like, I just want a picture. He's like, hey, Bill, can I get a picture? He's like, you got to put your drink down. He's like, oh, yeah. And then Goldberg grabbed his wrist. It was like, whoa. Like, lift him and bitch, he was like, oh, oh, oh.

He just came over Goldberg's back. Nice. Goldberg just has a fucking... What is this? Such a nice guy, too. Very. Very well spoken, too. It's a little different than Chuck. He's been hit once or twice with... Dude, like, all of their fucking stories, they just, like, beat, like, from...

UFC fighters literally just get the shit beat out of them. And then pro wrestlers still get the shit beat out of them. It's fake, bro. He was telling stories of him fighting The Undertaker.

and he was like yeah he just conscious don't be on my head i blacked out woke up didn't know where i was in the ring bleeding everywhere jesus he was unconscious going he said he was like gave himself a concussion going into that match because usually he head butts the wall back when you did like that your entrance yeah jesus christ dude he like head butted and it was apparently like a concrete wall that didn't look like concrete so it was like dunk and he's like

And then he's like, and then I'm in the ring. Like, what is going on? He gets thrown into a turnbuckle. Don't. And then he gets tombstone.

Yeah, so he's like, and the ref apparently was like, you good? You good? He's like, no. Yeah. Stop. No. Yeah. No. No. Keep it going. He's just talking nonsense the entire time. I was like, holy shit, man. That's fucking insane. Huge car guy, though. Yeah. Massive. Yeah, he wants to buy my Hellcat. I know. He was like, hey, I'll give you cash, whatever you paid for it. It's like, goddamn.

Because I didn't know that my car is only one of 200 made last year. And I just somehow got lucky. I didn't know that. And he was like, hey, man, you know, I work for Dodge. Like, I do their commercials and stuff. Do not modify that car. I'll buy it for you or I'll trade you a 1300 horsepower Hellcat. And I was like, oh. I would trade you a 1300 horsepower Hellcat. I'd be like, done, here. Unless you want to collect that Hellcat. No.

Donut you'll have your third Hellcat that yeah Charm that's true and it's 1300 because that one's not that fast what you need from like 800 500 more I'm sweating thing my Volvo has like 320 you're adding two Volvos God damn, dude

Oh, it's crazy. So past cars and wrestling, because that's what this podcast is about. And come come. We got fucking video games. Oh, first tell the story about the homeless man. Yeah, don't add a story. On my way over here, I was driving by the gas station and I saw a homeless man on the side of the road, pick up a dead bird and put it in his pocket and then walk away. So driving, I was like, what's he looking at? Because he was like leaning over it, just like looking at it.

And then as I got closer, there's the stop sign right there. I was like watching him, watching him, watching him. I was like, oh, that's a dead bird. Maybe, I don't know, he's just looking at it. And he grabs it and he puts it in his pocket. He's like a cat. He just watched a man find dinner. Yeah, I don't know what happened there. It was weird. I wonder, and then he goes and leaves it at somebody's door. He's like a cat. He's like, I'll do this. Here's a present. Love me. That family will now let me into their home for dinner at night.

He's just standing outside. Oh, God. Why don't you call the cops? He's back. He's got a dead animal. He's just sitting there when they open the door like this. Like, can I come in? No. Get away. Call the police. Yeah, I live in a great area.

I'm glad we do all the guest appearances here. Oh, fuck you. Did you not? Hey, Goldberg, did you see the homeless guy that's collecting dead birds? Take a ride at the homeless guy collecting dead birds. Yeah, take a ride at the homeless guy collecting. Go pass the IRS raid van. That's how bad he's left. Can the IRS arrest people? Yeah, man. Can they? I don't know. Like tax evasion? Well, I know that, but they don't.

They don't have like IRS security people. They just like the federal government. That's terrifying. I think they just send FBI. Yeah, I think that's I think they just send police after you. Yeah. Good to know. I got to go, guys. All right. Let me collect my dragons. I got to leave. You hand me the dragon skull head. Thank you. Thank you. Right. It's like I go fill the sprinklers up with gasoline. I fake Claymore on my Roomba again, which, by the way, I found out is super illegal.

You don't know how to booby trap your house. Wait, what? That's why it's illegal. Not because it's a claymore on a room, but it's illegal because you can't make booby traps. Wait.

Yeah, you can make booby traps, but Brandon was telling me that man trapping is legal in Texas if you do it a certain way. Man trapping? Yeah, that's like the actual law. I prefer boobies over man trapping. I don't remember what he said because he was talking about a dude breaking into his truck a while back. And so he was trying to figure out how he could booby trap his truck because it keeps getting broken into. And so he looked up a bunch of laws he knows all about. Next time Brandon's on, we're going to talk about his story of man trapping. His name is Brandon. Brandon.

He's utterly ridiculous. I never knew about the booby trap thing. Yeah, it's illegal to booby trap your house. Define booby trap, though. Static placements that are meant to literally entrap somebody. But it Roomba moves. But you're not controlling it. I guess if you put a clacker on the bitch, like a triple click, and then you manually set it off. Yeah, see?

Is that legal? I don't know. All right, guys. Here's your question for the comments today.

What legal booby traps can you put in your house since all the lawyers out there watch this it depends on the state - in Texas in Texas Texas definitely gonna be thing yeah way more open build like a spike pit trap that's a punchy pit I was like what's the sheriff comes out? He's just like that's fine dead burglar in there. It's Texas

Why does it smell like human feces in there? Like the paint cans off the rack. Yeah. I threw my shit on those spikes. People get infected that way. That's what punji. That's what they used to do. Yeah. I didn't know. They would rub monkey shit on them. Yeah. Yeah. So if you didn't die, you get infected still and you get like, bro, I'm so glad we live in the age that we live in. Yeah. And that was 60 years ago. That was 60 years ago. That's right. Vietnam's. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, wars. Oh, fuck war. War. Dude, do you see the progression of like how civilized we've become compared to back in the day? Back in the day, they're like, you lied. Pour molten steel down their throat. It's just dying. And now it's like,

Yeah, let's use shit spikes. We've come so far. So far. We aren't court drawing and quartering them. We're just hitting them with the shit spikes. Yeah, but it's their fault. They should have watched out where they were walking. Yeah, they should have looked before they fell into the shit spike hole. That's what it's called. That's what it's called. It's called the shit spike hole. Batty naming booby traps.

This is called sharp point with poop on it. This is called shit spike hole. I mean, it's literally a shit spike hole. This is called Roomba with Claymore. No, that's a Boomba. Oh, a Boomba. It's a Boomba. It's like Mario. I have a fake Claymore somewhere. I did it in my house, my old house in Vermont. I had a fake Claymore. Fake Claymore ATF. And I put it on my Roomba and I would let it roll around the house.

It didn't do great cleaning under things anymore, but you know, it looked fun and that's all that mattered. I just picture batty. Cause when you lived in Vermont, you live by yourself. Yeah.

Just... You know what you're doing? Just batting with no friends, just watching your room, but driving around. Yeah, yeah, just like that. And you gotta put the claymore in the room. We gotta be careful now, because you don't want to trip it. And I'm talking to myself. And laughing. Yeah, just watching it drive around. You're like...

Wasn't good. Just drinking alone. Thank God I just got divorced. Batty, how are you handling your divorce? Hard cut to him. Drinking with a claymore on his head. Yeah, just driving in the room by himself. I'm sitting on the room by myself. Just laughing. It's going great. It's fine, guys. I'm doing real good. Can I text you again? He's super happy with my life.

Video games. And then we had what you just said. Sony bought. Sony bought Bungie for $4 billion, $3.7 billion. That's crazy. And they're teaming up with Discord. Or they bought Discord. I don't remember. No shit. I just saw an announcement actually today with Sony and Discord. What is that? What is that? Sony, Discord, go.

is officially rolling out now they just add discord's finally working with us thank god it's only you know 2022 it's crazy because you still have like in game when we play with cali now he uses discord through a third party app there's no actual fucking discord on half these fucking

And it's crazy the drop in quality when it's in-game voice. It's like they can have the nicest mic. It's still... Team can? Yeah. Sounds like you're yelling from a toilet bowl. Like, what are we... 340? What were we getting shot at? But they have that. And then Microsoft bought the big... They bought...

yeah blizzard jesus dude for 78 billion a lot yeah a lot of billions like all the billions yeah it was all the billions of dollars there was a post the other day it's like they own so many franchises now it's like insane think of like everything that activision blizzard has done yeah imagine buying world of warcraft like you just bought wow they also got like crash band like the entire crash bandicoot fucking uh uh for like

uh franchise who else was uh tony hawk all the old tony hawk games clothes were all activision well you get those like giant buys or whatever it's like how disney disney bought i mean disney star wars marvel star wars literally everything and you're like oh this is great what the you guys own everything now but the new star wars is pretty dope

I haven't watched a new... I have not watched it, and we can't give spoilers. We can't give spoilers, but I need to watch the new one. So, no spoilers. It's good, it's bad, it's good. Perfect. There's some down moments, but it's like... But it picks right the fuck up. We're talking about the new Boba Fett episode. Yeah, Boba Fett. Yeah. So good. The new episode. Oh, the new, new. Yeah, that's the one I need to watch. But yeah, Boba Fett's like... Because they're doing such good with the Tuskens. We can say it's like how they portray the Tuskens, and it's that new tribal mindset. Yeah. It's like...

humanizing them so you have that entire storyline which is gangster and then it's Star Wars which is gangster by itself so that's scary to think about these massive corporations monopolies 100 is nothing companies own everything literally how that works what the fuck but he's terrifying what do you how do you even do things but the other companies did shit look at how Sony treated spider-man

And then you had Marvel's Spider-Man, which is like, oh, do this. And then Sony's like, nope. And then finally they got. The Spider-Man movie was so good. I just don't think to watch it. You guys haven't seen it? I haven't even had a spoiler yet for it. As somebody over the age of 30, you're gonna nut everywhere. It's the one with Doctor Strange in it, right? Is that his name?

Yeah, because in the trailer. No, in the trailer. It's in the trailer. Yeah, in the trailer they show. Yeah. So in the trailer they do that. So that one. Can you guys just go watch this fucking. It's so. It was probably the best Marvel movie I've seen in like out of all the recent ones. Like better than Endgame. Yeah, I heard it's fucking. Yeah, I heard it's like one of the top. Yeah. You're looking at like Iron Man 1, Thor, Ragnarok, this Spider-Man and. Holy shit. Okay. Like the whole time I was like blah.

Are you watching fucking Demon Slayer yet, bro? I'm going to slap you. No. I'm going to slap... Bro. I saw the movie with you. Okay. Dude, the last four episodes of Demon Slayer. I couldn't get into it, man. Bro, just... If you watch this season, like every episode, they're ending... This is anime talk time, guys. Oh, yeah. They end on cliffhangers. And it's like the...

You're just like throwing shit at the TV. You're like, why? Really? Just give it. I'm like, I'm counting down when I know I'm like, they're going to fucking end it right. Fucking here. It's going to fade to black. And it's like, and then the music's a terrible ending song of. Yeah, it's awful. I'm like, oh,

You know what happens after you watch Demon Slayer? You just immediately turn on Attack on Titan. And everything's okay again for another 23 minutes. Is there a new Attack on Titan? Yeah. Okay, so I like Attack on Titan. You're like five episodes? Yep. No, we're on like seven now. Is it seven? I think it's like seven. Yeah, probably. Yeah. It's been a minute. Like the new Attack on Titan 2...

I haven't watched a new one. You didn't watch? I said to watch it! I went to bed early last night. You went to bed early on anime night? Yeah. It's Sunday's anime night. I still was tired. I don't give a... It's 23 minutes! I know! We were shooting guns at the fucking range all day. I know, I got sunburned at the range. I was real tired. I'm a ginger. I can't be outside too long. I got a text from Donut at 2.40 in the morning. Hi! I was like, I don't know what I was gonna tell you. Yeah.

I wake up, I'm like, ah, 7 a.m. Hi. At 2.30 or 4.00 in the morning. My bad. I was like, I wonder what he wanted. I don't know. You don't know? No. He's just texting me, hi. Heather and I might have had some drinks, and I wanted to say hi to my friend Eli, because we were talking about you guys. That's weird. I didn't get a text. Well, I looked, and I'm like, oh, shit, it's 3 in the morning. I bet Brandon has a text. Oh, my God.

I was wondering the new attack on Titans. I know how it ends. Cause I've already read it, but that I need to watch the two episodes. Cause they go hard. It's just, people are like, have you watched attack on tight? They're not going as hard as demons, demon slayers setting up.

Attack on Titan, this one was... Fucking Baller? Okay. It was better. Attack on Titan won this week. I mean, it was very close because Demon Slayer was fucking good this week. But the last three, like all four Demon Slayers with all the stuff is just... Bro, like... It's been nonstop for like four episodes of Demon Slayer. Yeah, there was a slight dip and you're still... The intro wasn't... The beginning was not good. No. It wasn't good at all. But then it kicks right... Holy shit. Yeah.

Oh my god, yeah, you're gonna fucking love it. It's just okay. It's going on right now seasons is there I know - Really? Yeah. Oh, I thought it was a fucking time. There's no catch up then what 24 episodes on the first one 24 on the first maybe 26 and then the second season is on seven seven or nine seven or nine Think of me Canyon every time He ruined it

Help me. Help me. Help me. Six form water blade attack. I love this entire beautiful anime sequence. It's just a fucking stab in the jugular real quick. Demons are so crafty. Yeah, these demons are so crafty. Oh, no. We hung out with Meat Canyon. Did we talk about that? Meat Canyon came up and hung out with us like two or three weeks ago. Yeah, I went to the range with you guys and then we went and ate.

Yep. Oh yeah. Yeah, we did. Yeah, we went eight. He's such a nice guy. Dude, he's, you know, you watch his videos and you're like, this man's a degenerate. Absolutely. He's just like a super kind human being with a sweet haircut. Sweet haircut. He's got that curly mullet going on. Dude. Oh yeah. He's just living the dream life. Beautiful. Oh,

We're in Tarkov. Holy shit. Oh yeah. These boys go. Uh, I, I was on the stream the other night and I was like, man, I wish I was a rogue or a character or something. Had an in-game item, anything. Um,

And Chad was like, just message Nikita. And so I messaged Nikita. I've talked with him briefly in the past. And I was like, hey, if you're running out of scab names, could you add Donut Operator and maybe Florida Man? He's like, yeah, I got you. But not only did he add Donut Operator and Florida Man, he added Batty, Grantham,

Lucas, he named Lucas Aimbotkin. No shit. Florida Man's in there, of course. Yeah, he added a lot of us in there. Oh, that's amazing. On the Lighthouse map in Tarkov now, we're the rogues. The really, really super hardcore NPCs. That's fucking dope. Yeah, you guys, our chat group, our group chat has just been like, I killed you, fuck. I was so mad. I farmed rogues.

for hours the other day just trying to find any of us i found one named jeff just jeff

Put in four hours last night, and I killed a grand thumb And then I was with Kings and Kings killed Florida man, but we couldn't find me or you goddammit So my stream title was like killing myself One of my sponsors on my stream ended up getting killed by me in street like he said he's like fuck you dude killed him like

Yeah, dude, that's so gangster and I don't even I need to play that game again. Come back with us I know I didn't like it like the first night or two. I played I was like man I Remember why I quit playing this but now it's it's good man. This new patches would run in super awesome I'm like see everything like okay This is actually working and in a good position and not about I need to learn the quest line and I

Oh, it's almost like you have like eight friends that just play this game and know everything about it. Oh, I know. Play with you again. You remember dad raids? Remember dad raids, Eli? Oh my God. The one with Freddie. Oh my God.

I'm out here birdwatching. Did you remember dad raids? No. When you'd have to be a dad, you'd have to dress up. No, I never did dad raids with us. Oh, you'd have to dress up like a dad and then you go to woods. There's so many new clothing options too as well. No shit. Lots of new. So we dress our PMCs, our characters up like a dad. Like a mustache, like a bandana, some dad sunglasses and wear a shitty vest and a bad backpack. And a hunting shotgun.

And then you have to be in character as a dad. That's hilarious. We accidentally make out and saw each other's dick. It was super weird.

He's not joking. We found our dad. That was the second time me and Eli ever talked on stream. It was us doing dad raids in Tarkov. That's awesome. Come down here. What did we call it? The kissing shack? To the kissing bush. Yeah, the kissing bush. And we'd sit there and be like, okay, spin the bottle and we'd throw a bottle. Oh, no. It's just us. And we're like, uh-oh. Looks like you lost. Come here. Yeah, get that beard locked into mine. That's exactly what dads do. Yeah.

That's all we did. And then we would talk about hunting. It's like, let's go find the deer. And we'd shoot a scav. Man, that deer's got two legs. Weird. Shoot it and be like, deer guy, we murdered somebody. Okay, we gotta hide the body in evidence. We'd like go and chuck this shit. It was just utter chaos. And that was like time two playing with fat. Yeah, I know.

Army friends Goldberg was saying this he's like it now I realize no matter what branch you are you guys all just act gay? Fixated on common dicks. Yeah, you guys just really like each other. It's a hundred percent. Mm-hmm hundred percent what we do That's what we keep our circle real Yeah, it's like a human centipede but I

Our mouths are dicks and our buttholes are buttholes. I eat the cuttlefish. What is it? Do I eat the chicken and rice or the cuttlefish? The cuttlefish. I was like, no. I don't know what I'm going to do. I eat the cuttlefish. Go ahead.

- I forgot about that episode. - Guys, go back and watch the human centipede episode of South Park, please. It's one of the best ones ever made. 'Cause it was the ice centipede, 'cause it was an apple product. - Yeah, the ice centipede. - I hate it so much. - So good. - The fruit and like chicken. It was like the base or just like something small and then cuttlefish. - Cuttlefish.

Oh my god. I hate our podcast. Do you guys remember the World of Warcraft episode? Yes. That was kind of cool. Oh my, iconic episode of South Park. God, I was in the military. Yeah, I was, I was literally. Yeah, that was, that was 10 years ago, probably. Yeah. 10, 12. I might have been in high school or just that high school. 12 years ago. I think it was high school. 2006? Yeah, I was in high school. Jeez. Seven? Because I'm trying to remember if it was...

This was pre-deployment, so this was literally 2007, beginning of 2007. Yeah, when I was in high school, Eli. Yeah. Oh, yeah, well, I always forget I'm old. You always forget you're old? That's weird because I remind you daily. I know, and that moment reminds me too. That was actually a decent episode, man. Remember his mom bringing the shit bucket down? Mom, bathroom! Mom, bathroom! She's like, brr, and the bucket.

My mom used to do that for me. It was awesome. Shit bucket? Yeah. You had a great mom. Man. Man. Man.

I knew a guy that got kicked out of the Navy because he was doing that shit. He would, like, he would. What? So every Friday he would go to McDonald's and get, like, 30 double cheeseburgers. And then he would sit there and play World of Warcraft from Friday till Monday morning. Like, no sleep. And he would shit in a bucket and piss in bottles and just sit there and play World of Warcraft. And they ended up kicking him out for failure to adapt to military standards. Yeah. I'd say so. You can't get, like, your barracks, the bathrooms, how many feet from you? Yeah, it's...

Turn around and you're in your bathroom. No. How dare you? No, he's raiding. That man is raiding. He was. Priority. This is right when Wrath of the Lich King came out, man. The best expansion ever. You can't blame him. You can't. Sometimes you just gotta shit yourself, bro. Like, you're raiding. It's Wrath. Like, no. It's Wrath. I don't... Man, like, I...

Go to the bathroom, guys. Yeah, yeah. Just go shit. What's fucking wrong with you? Everywhere. So, I don't know. I have so many World of Warcraft stories from the military, too. Oh, I love them. Yeah. So, this dude picks me up one time from the barracks, and it was the first time I ever met him, first time going to my command. And he saw that I had some, like, beer sitting there, and he's like, oh, yeah, I drank a whole 12-pack last night. And I'm like, oh, cool. What's your brand? Mountain Dew. I'm like, oh, so I already know this guy's fucking weird. And then him and his wife were both in the Navy. Yeah.

He actually met her on World of Warcraft. They got married. And then their kids got taken away because they were raiding so much. They weren't taking care of their kids. And then she left him for their guild master of their World of Warcraft guild. Oh, my God. You are... That's the highest quality of people right there. Oh, yeah, man. Jesus. That's a...

Oh my god. There was another, well, there was a guy, fuck, he played World of Warcraft with his wife. They were in the military during the army. This was when I was a private. He was a specialist. And he was like, yeah, we play video games together, this. And then she found somebody else in WoW that you play with and you flew out while we deployed.

She then left him for that guy. You just got a higher fucking gear set than you were. What's your gear level? I'm like 1800. That happens a lot. The eye level.

Dude, that's insane. He's just got a higher eye level. I'm blown away right now. This is... What's this video game? This is weird. I don't know. It's just my time, and, like, none of the guys I was really in with, there was a couple that were nerds, but mine was, like, the good old boy hunting guys. Oh, yeah. I was in nowhere Vermont. Like, there was no... There wasn't nerds, and if there was, they didn't talk about that shit. So, like, I didn't... It's just weird to hear...

Yeah, there was nerds in the military. When I know everybody tells about it now, constantly, I'm hearing in my chat, like, dude, I'm a giant D&D nerd, too. I'm in the army. We play every week. I'm like, where the fuck was this, man? Shit! I had, like, Ennis and Kleinfilter. They would play... They were big into... I...

Bless Ennis' soul. That man, he goes hard whatever he gets addicted to. That's weird. I wonder who would do that. He never played an MMO, and I'm the one that introduced him to World of Warcraft. You're Harold. Yeah, you're his fucking crack dealer. Hell yeah, 100% take the blame for that one. And then Climb Filter, he's like, you guys play World of Warcraft? I was like, yeah. And he's like, oh, I love that game. I was like, oh, God, he's going to be like...

i want to play and he's going to be a scrub and then he had like four maxed out level characters and this is like this is pre this is vanilla oh god it was hard to get 60. i only had 160 and i like and i played it for years yeah it was a lot harder back in the day so it was like that was it i was like what the oh homeboy you play because i was coming from final fantasy 11 everquest everquest i tell you like

Long raids were 20 hours Oh yeah yeah yeah It was insane Because you do actual like cool down rotations You have to wait hours for the next fucking thing Yeah you'd be like okay These are on 6 minute to 20 minute cool down timers So you're farming all the creatures as you can Then when everyone has to heal back up Healing took fuck forever Because you'd actually have to sit and meditate So you're looking at 20 to 30 minute down times When everyone has to heal back up

And then you, okay, let's fucking kill this, kill this. Okay, now we got... Short rest in EverQuest was a literal short fucking rest. Yeah, it was literally like eating and the food or water didn't matter in EverQuest. So you just sit there and you're like, tick. And every tick was six HP. Jesus Christ. Twelve if you had a good one. And then...

You just wait. Yeah, you literally just sit there as a group and commute. But you did build relationships because you're sitting there talking to these people that you're leveling up with. And you met everyone. You knew who sucked at the fucking game. You knew who didn't. And when you got excommunicated in EverQuest, it wasn't like...

Everyone knew you from like low level to high level. It's like that's the cheating piece of shit. That's the ninja looter because ninja looting was easy. Yeah, it was like that back in the early wild days before they had cross realm. Yes. Stuff because you knew who was on your server and you knew who was like that. Who's the ninja looter? Same thing. Yeah. Just grab everything. Didn't matter if they needed it. Yeah.

Oh yeah. 50 DKP minus. Well, EverQuest, it was because there was no bind on equip or bind on pickup. It's just grab. Oh shit. I didn't remember that. Yeah, you could sell it to it because you grab those items and you're like, hey, who wants this? And then you go to the East Common Tunnels and you'd have to do for sale because there was no bazaar. There was no auction house. It was all just your check. Yeah, so money was based off of that on how much you want to sell something, buy something, or just exchange. That's terrifying.

Oh, yeah. Fuck old school video games, man. There's no... I love them. They're my favorite thing, but then they're...

it's very nostalgic yeah the nostalgia wears off real fucking fast you're like yeah because classic wow just came out what you last year the year before and i was like oh i can't wait to play oh yeah you were so stoked oh yeah we talked about this i was so stoked about it and i got to play and it was like fuck this it took me it took like an hour to get to level five i'm like nah i don't want to do this no more that grind is way too much that's a grind man i can't believe i did that shit back in the day but then again i i bought it not my main character but i

bought it a little bit. And you had way more time when you were younger. Yeah, I was in high school. Elvis filled high school because of World of Worker. I did fill high school because of EverQuest and Final Fantasy and Phantasy Star Online and Metal Gear Solid 2.

And then you're like, what do I do now? War. Okay. Literally. War. Metal Gear Solid 2 was, I think, the reason I finally got kicked out. Because they're like, you've missed way too many days of school. And I was like, what? I'll catch up on homework. And they're like, no, it's too late. You've missed too many. I was like, what do I do? And they're like, you're going to have to go an extra year of school. And I was like, oh.

Oh yeah, I drop out. War it is. War it is. I am definitely not doing it. I gotta go. There's a surge I hear about. What are you going to do? I'll figure life out. I'm going to move away from here though and roll them dice. See what happens. Get my GED. I get shot. I'll ricochet. Well, first it was like GED so you can join the military. Did you cheat on that? The GED test? No, I actually can take a test.

Literally sit there, do the whole thing, and then join. And then I was like, okay, I can do whatever I want. And they're like, you have a GED, you can be infantry. And I was like... It's like that or a cook. Well, I can do like airborne and stuff, right? And they're like, no, you literally are... You're going to the line. I was like, but what if they're like...

well if you're if if you perform good your drills aren't to offer you contracts i was like cool that sounds great but he still did not offer me contracts graduated honors this is like one of the only people that shot only dude that shot uh x one of the few it was only like six of us a shot expert and then only seven of us man it might have been five of us that maxed the pt score and i did both yeah so it was like honor so you know the honor graduates yeah and

And they're like, give me my blood rifles. Give them to me. Eli, go to the line. I was like, fuck you. My drill, my drill, my, my, my recruiter. Yeah. Lied. What happened? My drills aren't just loud. He's like, yeah, private. They fucking lie. I was like, I wanted to be a ranger. It's the same thing in the Navy, but it's called boats. One's mate.

You're just shit work. They need that one guy to do shit work, and it's like being on the line. It's like the infantry guy. It's called a boat's one's mate. But they tell you, they're like, you can do like five different kinds of jobs. You can do this and this and this. Don't worry. It was the same thing. You might get a contract, but it's like, no, you're the guy like hanging off the side of the ship, painting the fucking ship. You're the number guy. Yeah, you're the- Somebody's got to paint the numbers on the shit. Yeah, that's where the GED guys go in the Navy. Oh, God, so glad I didn't join that. Yeah.

That would have sucked. Yeah, mine was like, you're going to war. I knew I was going to war like 100% on that one. I was like, nah, bro, you got to go. I joined during this surge. Yeah, yeah, it was the surge. It was 100%. You doing this.

And then I was just like, oh, just get a lock. But then they tried to send me to ranger school after I was in the unit and I'm already a year in. And I'm like, at that point I was like, oh no, I did pre ranger. And then I was like everything else, whatever the fuck it was. Rip. No. So rip.

Turned into Rastrip was... Oh, that's okay. That was for Ranger Introduction. That's to be on the battalion. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I was like... But then you have Ranger School. Yep. And then you have Pre-Ranger School, which is like a two-week or 15-day course. I forget. And then it was...

Yeah. And it was just like, oh, do you? OK, Eli, now to go to ranger school, you're good to go. We'll send you. You just got to pass this PT test. I was like, I don't want to go to rangers. I was like, literally, no, that sounds terrible. And they're like, yeah, you just have to pass it. Then we'll send you. I was like, no, you're taking the test. I was like, I'm taking the test. And they're like, yeah, you're taking the test. I was like, OK, let's do pull up. One, two, three. I was like, how many do I have to do? Five. I was like, oh, no, I couldn't do it. No, no. And they're like, you can't go now.

What the fuck have I been saying this entire fucking time? I wanna go! You don't think I'm gonna shitbag and fail this on purpose? Cause I'm gonna shitbag this and fail this on purpose. Well no, you're gonna make me do more pushups after. But at least I'm not 60 days sucking dick. I'm not in mountain pain dying like no.

Fucking miserable. Christ, Matt almost died in Ranger School, right? Didn't he get bit by something? Oh yeah, he had like an affection or something. He had something really bad. STD from all the guys. From all the dudes.

Yeah, yeah, something bad happened to him. I don't fucking... I can't remember what it is. It was like, yeah, he was allergic to something, or... It's the military, man. Like, they don't like in the schools or anything. You're just like... They do not give a fuck. No, you just do it. Suck it up, soldier. Speaking of Mr. Matt's sextant... Do you want this fucking... Yeah. I hate all of that shit. I'm like, no, this is fucking terrible. No, I never had a chance, and I'm glad. Did not want to do that at all. Military...

Join guys. This is your military recruiting video. We're the worst recruiters ever. Do you guys love the military? Go to college. Don't go to college either. That's a waste of money. Depending if you're going to be a doctor, go to go to college. Don't learn doctors on YouTube. Matt's doing all right.

Oh yeah, a demo. He learned it from, right? I don't know. But he learned his vet on YouTube, right? He's not an actual vet? Yeah, he watched YouTube videos and stuff. Yeah, and then he just printed out a doctor. I mean, anyone who's got a printer can be a doctor, guys. You just print out the thing that says, I'm a doctor. He watched eight master classes afterwards and was like, did it. Print. He just printed off a degree. No wonder he's killed so many kittens. Yeah.

That's probably the funniest thing I've ever heard him say. Because it was the first time I hung out. Like, one of the first times I hung out with him. Yeah, that was one of the first times we were just in Texas hanging out with him. We were at the Triarch Aerial Gunner event where we shot out of the helicopter and we were walking. He's like, I've killed so many kittens. And just keeps walking. I'm like, oh. No, that was in... That was Triarch, I'm pretty sure. It was. What was the restaurant? We were eating fucking chicken wings. Because I was like, wait, all y'all eat chicken tendies? That was before I moved here, so...

We were all at that restaurant because we were all eating fucking chicken tender. Oh, it was Buffalo Wild Wings. Yeah. That's weird. Oh, yeah, because the fights were on that night. Uh-huh. Yep, yep, yep. Dude, look. Fucking autism. You ever been tested? It's a superpower. It's a weird superpower.

I can travel faster than a speeding bullet. I just shit myself and control it, but unfortunately for his power to work. It's like bad superpowers. You have like an awesome one, but a very bad trade-off. Jesus was a superhero. Batty has unlimited strength. He just comes anytime he engages that. I would take that. That's a win-win. Why does Batty sleep all the time?

It's 4 p.m. and Batty's sleeping. Yeah, he had to move a couch today. Don't touch it. Donut can fly, but he just, he automatically yells racial slurs. I don't control this. It's the worst superpowers ever possible. Flying turrets. Flying turrets. Which is the worst.

- You're trying to save people. You have to say, they're like, I'm so sorry. When you land, you're like, I'm gonna apologize ahead of time for saving your life. They're like, why Superman? - You don't want him. - Here I go. - They take off and when Donut lands, he's like,

The family's just like, Paul. I go to rescue a minority from a burning building and they just don't even want to come. No, no. The fire's clear. I didn't mean to say that. I push my kids back. Hey guys, let's try to get canceled this week. By creating the greatest superpowers ever to exist. God, we have some good superpower chats. Did we ask Tim what his superpower would be? Tim's? Yeah. No. We should ask Tim.

We'll get Tim back on. He probably would have said that same thing, though. I would want to fly and shout racial slurs. That's his witch. It's like, Tim, you don't want... You didn't say you had to have a downside. Tim's like, I want to yell racial slurs, but I fly. Flip that around. Oh, sorry. I mean, I want to fly, but... Welcome to Unsubscribe. Don't you remember this guy?

He's nice! Brandon's fucking ridiculous. Fuck you! Fuck Brandon! Brandon would probably have a cool superpower. Brandon wouldn't shout racial slurs. Oh my god, this is my favorite one now. It's a comedy called... I hate all of us so much. What do we have in Goldberg on the podcast? We need to get Bill on here. How about this awful racist superpower?

Bill Gober. God, that would be so bad. You get these amazing powers like My Hero Academia. It's just tied with really bad shit. Just awful, awful downsides. Like, you flash children like this. No! No! It's like, we need somebody to come rescue the kids from the burning school. No, Superman, you can't go. Sorry, Superman. You have that 500-foot thing you can't do anymore. Okay.

I can shoot fire out of my fingertips, but my dick looks like a tic-tac. Balls are normal. Dicks are normal. Looks like two hacky sacks and a lima bean. That's real sad. Guys, guns, and video games. Am I right, everyone?

Holy shit. Yeah, this one's going to be yellow for a couple days. We didn't offend the Christians this time. Yeah, see, we're good. Oh, yeah, yeah. Jesus, superhero. You can fly. You just T-pose the entire time. Right on the cross.

It's like a shitty Iron Man suit. Engage! All right, we offended the Christians. Now we got them all. Now that we've offended everybody. Our job here is done. Good job, super team. What would the superhero team? You have like the elite, the Justice League.

Oh, God. What's Marvel's team? The Avengers. The Avengers, yeah. What would be like our shitty superhero team be? Yeah. That no one wants around. It's fucking those guys. Are they sending the Avengers...

No. No, they're sending... Dumb fucks. Super guys. Super guys, yeah. Super guys. They gotta choose their name and this is what they chose. Super guys. Two chicks though, they're like, can we change our name? And changing font. It's really bad font. Yeah. Yeah, papyrus.

It's just a mix of common sense and propionic. Each letter is different. Super guys. Hello, Hannah. No. Never will we ever.

On this podcast. I think we've told you guys before, we have a list of skits we can never, ever do or talk about. They get put in this nice little bin right here. It's Eli's head. And they die. They die in that bin. That's where they go to die. No. One of them involves a very special... Hold on, guys. I can't say what this skit's called.

You can't say anything about this game. Very special heaven. Yeah, we'll call it special heaven. Hello, Hannah. I'm saying Pete. Welcome. You guys want to play D&D sometime? Yeah, let's play D&D. So me and Eli are actually planning on some D&D stuff. Like we've been talking. Yeah, getting it fucking... Can I play it?

Yeah, you're unsubscribed. You don't have a choice. We replaced Batty, not you. It's going to be real weird when Brandon's sitting in the DM chair, but a speaker box with my voice and I'm in the background in the other room because I can't sit with you guys anymore. I'd be like, all right, guys, AKs are great, but can you please roll initiative? And Brandon's just going to be there like moving his arms because he doesn't know what the fuck's going on. We'll treat it like Dorothy. Dorothy.

Dorothy. Dorothy the tornado. The guy behind the curtain. Yeah. What is that movie called? What the fuck? I almost said House in Wonderland. You almost said House in Wonderland. I almost did. Wow. Wicked Witch of the West. Are we done? The first colored movie of all time. We're not in Kansas anymore. It's literally the first colored movie of all time. You're fucking me up. I could have got it if you didn't say anything. The Yellow Brick Road. What is the movie called?

What is wrong with us? We only drink two beers a piece. Hold on. It has to do with Dorothy. It has the dog, Toto. Toto.

And then they go to the Wizard of Oz. Oh, my God. That was five minutes of the podcast dedicated to us. Why do three grown men just have trouble with that? You just watched our brains buffer for a few minutes. If you wonder what the podcast is going to be like when we're 70, you just experienced that. In the name of this episode, buffering. No, it's going to be like, welcome to Unsubscribe. We have...

And I'm like, hey, what's his name? And you're like, that's Cody Operator. Brandon. Hey, Brandon. Thank you. And then I'm short Matt Best. Short Matt Best. God, dude. We just had 56K modems going off in our heads. Eeyore, eeyore.

My mom just picked up the phone while I was playing Anarchy Online. Oh, God, that was the best. We literally just stalled out. I've never done that. Yeah, that was rough. I felt pressured. I couldn't think of it. You couldn't think of it? You couldn't think of it? So I was like, ah, fuck. It's like that one skit where that guy runs up to people and he's like, name a woman. Name a woman. And he has money in his hand. And the girl's like, ah, what? Like, anyway, he's like, name a woman.

Just one. And she's like, oh, I don't. One woman. Just say a name. Just name a woman. Macklemore. Fuck. She freaks out. It's a solid like two minutes of her like, ah, ah. I'm like, just yell Oprah. Just a baseline woman name or yourself. Jessica. Yeah, done. People freak out when they're on the spot. We just did that with Wizard of Oz.

I could see the title in my head. I know. Yellow Brick Road is what got me because it was like, wait, yellow brick road. And then I was thinking of the green towers. I'm looking at the VHS copy. I'm just like, yeah, I had to pull up his autistic memory. Yeah, literally how it works. Swiping, swiping, swiping. Toto. The lion. The flying monkeys. I hate this so much.

If I only had a brain. We would all be the scarecrow. We just want a brain. Just one for all three. We'll share it. We just need to know what movie we're in. Just cut it into pieces. We'll use it. Oh my God, dude.

You can probably think of movie titles. I am dying right now. Together we are the Scarecrow. Stop it. You are a power combine. We the super guys.

We section this brain out wrong. It's like, Batty gets the speech part. He's like, hi, I'm Batty. I'm like, cum! Cum sex! I'm just kidding. Donut's great at painting, though. Yeah, Donut's just like doing the art stuff. We can't communicate outside of that. I'm just the violent cum and sex part of the brain. Just trying to fuck stuff. Guys, I think we're hungry. Yeah, I'm hungry. Batty's hungry. Food! Food!

- Food! - John is just like, drawing a chicken wing. - Together we're the super guys. - Can we dress up like superheroes for a photo for unsubscribing? - Oh, 100%. - Like shitty cape, like a little. - Just whatever we want. - The super guys. - Yeah, super guys. - You gotta strike a superhero pose.

Oh, no. Jesus. I can't wait till we forget about doing anything that we've talked about today. Well, we need to get... We have to have Matt back on the podcast with the shirt thing. Matt's been doing a really good picture. We won't say what it is. Yeah, Matt actually remembered the things we said we would do. Yeah, that's why he's successful. We didn't do any of that. He followed... Yeah, we were like, we're going to do this, and it's gone. Literally, the moment it ended, we're like, let's go get food and drink more.

We got Heather's coming on. Yep. Goldberg's coming on. We need to fly out Mike. We'll just have actual Grantham. Can we just call Mike the whole time, though? Yeah. Just to fuck with everybody who's listening. Like, wait, is that? I think I'll call him Mike, but I hate your fucking first name. Call me Kyle. No. Eli, say Kyle. I said it last time on a podcast in Vegas, and people were like, Batty's name is Kyle? Like, they're offended by that.

Even saying Cody's weird to me. I'm like, I don't mind Cody. I call him Cody all the time. I'm like, Donut. People say the same thing in the comments. They're like, that's your fucking name? It's like, yes, my name's like goddamn Donut. It's like I was born, Moe. I'm like, yeah, Donut. What the fuck? We have normal people names. Yep. Kyle. Well, okay, mostly normal people names. I've only ever punched a couple holes in drywall. Leave me alone.

I don't even drink Monster. Do a lot of the Tarkov guys want to come on? Oh, yeah. Veritas said he would come on. Yeah, Veritas was a good dude. Plus, he's super kind of smart, so that'd be neat to talk to somebody who's not a fucking idiot. Well, it's like when Tim was going off about nerd shit, I was like, that's when you checked in. That was literally PTS Donuts. Nerd stuff started, and you were just like, we're talking about fantasy literature. Squirrel. You do this, Blink.

It's like the one I first It's this I'm gonna get like a worst segment I know how PTSD in the podcast We got PTSD from Tim Kennedy's worst stories Tim's like excited about fucking books And Tim's like yeah And then the nerd is like

Just go in the comments, you'll see a timestamp perfectly. Are you okay, bro? Which we do need to, like one episode, we just need to bring it. We need to read our best comments. There are so many. We get a ton of comments. Yeah. I was very surprised. I like when there's the hateful ones because those make me laugh. Is there hateful ones? That one that you were like, fuck that guy. Oh, Jesus. Yeah.

He was like so complimentary. He's like, then me. He was like, oh my God. And he's like, bad. He's a piece of shit. I was like, whoa. He just hated that. Ginger fuck. I was like, God damn. That dude just hates Maddie. I mean, I could, I'm probably, I'm kind of a piece of shit. Like I get it. Compared to us. So you're,

We're both all pieces of shit here. Thank you. We're drinking ranch water on a Monday afternoon. Is that what today is? I thought it was Sunday. No, we did the minigun on Sunday. Yeah, that's why I was like, I have a war clue. We filmed a podcast on a Monday? Yeah. I guess so. So Fluck has one day to edit this. Thanks, Fluck.

Yeah, we got put everything gets fucking mixed in the house. I think everyone doing content or trying to film or do other shit or shooting mini guns with Goldberg. Yeah, podcast or that. If you would ask me when I was 14 years old watching wrestling like Monday Night Raw or Wednesday Night Smackdown or whatever the fuck it was, you know, back in the day at 11 o'clock at night when I'm supposed to be in bed for school. If in 15 years I would be shooting mini guns with

With Bill Goldberg, the man I just watched spear The Undertaker, I would have called you a crackhead idiot and told you to go fuck your mother.

Yep, we did that. We did that today. It's fucking yesterday. Imagine going back to your like I just picture baddie like teleporting back He's a guy oh you punch your little self in the face just because he's gonna remember it And I'm like Betty did you tell your little self that you get to shoot guns with Goldberg you're like no I just punched him in the face that came back to our time. Oh

You wasted your time travel on that? Yeah, I just wanted to punch my little self. Fucking nerd. Yeah. Fucking nerd. Don't join the army. Don't go to college either, though. Well, like any people, like you look back at fucking 15, when you were in high school or 15 or even in the military, if they came back and they're like, bro, you're going to be like,

a figure in this space of military and the police space and you're going to have the donut space. Yeah. And the donut space of people are going to look up to you and ask you questions. You'd be like, get the fuck out of here. Yeah. Same for you. I guarantee you, like you're going to play video games and make money doing that and whatever else your heart and have a podcast where you talk about. He's still playing oblivion at the time. So I don't believe you.

I'd just walk up to my dad and be like, see, Fusher, myself came. He said, I'm going to make money doing this. Fuck you, dad. And my dad would have slapped me. Yep. He's a very intimidating man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, my dad would have hit me. And then told me to go play outside in the dirt. Then he would lock the door. So little baddie would have got punched twice that day. That strange ginger man appeared in my room and punched me. Are you on drugs? Baddie walks outside. A bloody nose. He's like, dad, someone tell me.

teleported and hit me. That is just Christ. I'm going to tell you about lying.

Sorry, I'm teleport back bad. He's gone. He's a fucking super villain like we fucked that one Super guy he's not a super guy. He's a super bad guy There's the dad joke you ready to close it down Hawkeye wait, I don't close it down. Yeah, bad you close it one of you guys

Thanks for watching the unsubscribe podcast today with our new cameras and new audio. Okay, reset that, you fucking Jesus Christ. Thank you for watching the unsubscribe podcast. We have Eli Double Tap, Donut Operator, and of course, I'm Batty Streams. Thank you guys for being here, and we'll see you next time. Or we won't. I don't know. We'll see. We'll see how that warning logo goes. Super guys. Super guys. Super guys.

- No, nobody move. We gotta do the ad spot thing. - With all the beer on the table. - I know, oh yeah, we gotta just, let's just clear all this. - Put it down here. Ranchies and the wadis, so that way we can get rid of all that stuff on. - Bootiful. - We'll leave the hentai.