COVID-19 viruses like me change to fool your immune system and make you sick, but updated vaccines help protect you. Stay up to date on COVID-19 and flu vaccinations sponsored by champions for vaccine education, equity and progress. Just a reminder to subscribe. Thanks guys. I think we have everything. I'm losing my mind today, which is perfect for this theme. Um,
I just have had like a series of unfortunate events I feel like this week that have made life just like so stressful and crazy that I feel like I don't have any patience. None. It's, I don't know where it went. It's gone. It's not loading. Air doesn't exist. Okay. So how's your week going? Pretty good. You know, I am, it's an ironic theme because I actually have a lot of patience for the bullshit. Yeah.
How? What's the secret? My dad. My dad is the most patient man I've ever met in my life. I think he just taught me patience. Like I can have my moments of impatience for sure. But like all things considered, I think I'm one of the more patient people I know. Yeah. Certain things. I don't have that. But otherwise, I mean, I don't know. I really don't know. I just grace like I just give things some grace.
I need to learn. All good things take time, baby. I get with certain things. I guess it's just I don't have patience for disruption. When someone says, I'm going to be there at 4 p.m. And then at 3.45, it's like, hey, I won't be making it. And I'm like,
I went out of my way. That's not what I would – I guess that is a form of patience, but that's not what I think of when I hear the word patience. Like for me, that's one thing I don't have patience for. If you disrupt my schedule or ineptness, I've talked about this on another episode. If you say you're going to do something and you're like proving to be inept at it, I lose my patience. That's one of the quick ways to lose my patience. But when I think of patience, I think of just like –
Giving things time and understanding that like it might not be right the first time and having to kind of like go with it a little bit. That's where I have a lot of patience. But like not like when someone says they're going to do something and don't do it. I don't have a lot of patience for that. This is going to be the perfect theme for you. Is it? I can feel it. Okay. Which, by the way, hi guys. Welcome back to another episode of Two Hot Takes. I can't even talk. I'm so anxious. I know. I forgot how to do this. I'm your host, Morgan. I'm Alejandra. Woo!
The people call me Ale. I'm getting introduced a lot as Ale lately. Okay. I like that. I think it's time for a rebrand. Just kidding. Just kidding. I'm not going to do that to everyone. But I do go by Ale. Yeah. It's been a thing for a while. Yeah. It has. It has. Okay. Well, let's dive in. Let's do it. Let's do it.
So this first one, it is three months old. It's been out there for a minute, but it is titled, Am I the Asshole for Refusing to Listen to My Mother-in-Law's Speech on My Wedding? So I hate speeches. I
I never understood the appeal. I think they are boring, exhausting, and very, very forced. What? But having said that, this is just my opinion and I never forced it on anyone. Fair. I have sat through long, excruciating speeches without complaining like any other decent human being.
When it was my turn to get married, however, I requested no speeches. We wrote that we loved everyone and that we knew they loved us. So if you wanted to say something, say it directly to us in private.
My husband thought it was funny, but he knew my feelings about speeches. We had a small wedding with only loved ones, a weekend long. My husband loves games, so the wedding planner did a really great taskmaster type of game, and everyone appreciated it. Dinner came, and mother-in-law stood up and started by saying, quote, "'I know we are forbidden to make speeches by the bride, but this is my only son getting married, so I will say what I want to.'"
No, the fuck you won't. I didn't hear the rest because I was seeing red. My sisters and bridesmaids were shocked. I pretended like she wasn't talking and continued my conversation with my girls. Oh, my God. They did the same. Oh, my God. Mother-in-law was furious. Both sister-in-laws were furious, and my husband was very angry that it showed in his profile.
He refused to even look at me. The rest of the night was awkward. The rest of your wedding night was awkward? My husband's side was sulking in their seats. I wanted to make sure it wasn't ruined for the rest of us, and we ended up having a blast. Next day, I spent it with my family and friends. My husband said that I was very wrong in what I did. I couldn't force mother-in-law to shut the fuck up, and he knew she wouldn't no matter how much we told her.
I shouldn't have disrespected and humiliated her like this. Our marriage started on the wrong foot, it seems. Am I the asshole? Damn. Remember, the theme is patience. I know. To have or not to have. It's just hard because everyone would handle this so differently. What do you think?
I think this is one of those moments where everyone involved could have communicated better. Like the husband already knew his mom. My mom's not going to not make a speech. Tell your wife that. You think so? Yeah. People go rogue.
Yeah. People have one too many tequila shots. I think that is true. And they're like, I'm one tequila shot away from breaking the rules. Yeah, but OP says here, my husband said I was very wrong in what I did. He knew she wouldn't no matter how much we told her. Like she was going to make the speech no matter what. He already knew that. Yeah. So why not say, hey. But maybe he did. Maybe and the bride just didn't want to hear it. Right. Or maybe she was just like, okay.
Okay. You know, we don't know. We don't know, but I can't put push blame on the he did at the end of the day. He didn't force her to make a speech. Yeah. Well, and so there is like a little PS mother-in-law loves making speeches, sometimes 15 minutes long and not usually mean speeches disguised as humor that often isn't appreciated at all by the speak. Wait, okay.
Not usually. I think they kind of have some typos. Yeah. And usually mean speeches disguised as humor. Okay. Also like a 15 minute long speech. That's a monologue. That's a TED talk. That's a manifesto. That's a lot. That's a lot. So I get not wanting any speeches and she should have been respected.
I don't know because I think you do have times in your life where you can bite the bullet, have a little patience. Okay. If it were me...
I'd be annoyed, but I would be respectful. I think knowing both of us, we would bite our tongues and sit there and listen. For sure. Well, first off, I love speeches. This would never be me. I would sit there and be like, more speeches. That's my favorite part of the wedding. Yeah. But if I didn't want speeches and this happened or whatever it was, speeches is the subject. It could be anything, right? They just do something that you specifically said you didn't want on your wedding day. Mm-hmm.
I would be for sure annoyed, have a conversation later, but I would bite the, I would bite the tongue, smile and wave, look gracious and happy. And we know it is what it is. It is what it is. It's a day meant to be celebrated and happy and okay, this person stepped out of bounds and it's really annoying. But what were her intentions? Were intentions to be mean? Or do you think she was genuinely just trying to give a nice little speech? Yeah. I don't know. I think everyone can see through stuff too. Like I went to a wedding recently and
There were some not great speeches. You just sit there and enjoy your wine. Like, pick out a piece of cake. I don't know. Like, it doesn't have to be like, I'm zoned in and listening to every word. Like, you can have a
I don't know. Get drunk. Go to the bathroom. I did get really, one time there was a speech that was easily 15 minutes and not good. Getting awkward. Getting political. Way off topic. Yeah. It was weird. And I'm pretty sure I blacked out during the speech. Yeah.
Sometimes you just, I don't know. I literally just was like chugging my wine because I was like, oh my God, it needs to be over. It needs to be over. And it wasn't. And I just kept drinking. And I'm not kidding. That's like literally when I think of that wedding, like I don't, it's fuzzy after that. Yeah. Oh my God. So anyway, try that method. Do what you want during the speech. I mean, have a drink, download Yahtzee or June's Journey on your phone. Go to the bathroom, reapply some lip liner.
Go get a drink at the bar. Go fix your dress. A little hard when you're the bride and you kind of have to look. Oh, we're talking about from the start. No, in general. In general, she had more limited options. As a bride, I don't know. Play footsie with your partner next to you. Yeah. Give him a handjob under the table. Start dreaming about your honeymoon and look at the person giving the speech. I don't know. Like...
You just got to grin and bear it sometimes. There are worse things in life. There are worse things in life to have to sit through. Yeah, this is one where no patience and maybe she should have had some. I just think like also, I mean, one thing that we shouldn't maybe ignore is that this is now your family and you are marrying into this family. And why start off on a negative note?
Tone like, you know, you're an adult, you know, that ignoring and blatantly tuning out somebody's speech and having a sidebar conversation is disrespectful regardless of the context. It's just a mean thing to do. It's a petty thing to do. Why?
Why start off your marriage and your new family like that? Well, and the husband was so mad at her. Yeah. Like she didn't even hang out with him the next day. She hung out with her family and friends. And I think if I were in the husband's position, I think I'd be mad too. Yeah. If my mom did that, I would be like, listen, I'll talk to my mom because I agree. Your wishes were very clear and she did everything.
overstep yeah but like come on like that was that's my mom it's not your mom like i think like the one thing he could have done is when he saw his mom go to get the mic he could have gone over to her stood by her giving her her quick one minute i'm so excited and then thanks mom yanked the mic like there's something he could have done too
Oh, for sure. But I mean, this does happen. I think about my brother's wedding. My grandma got so drunk, she gave an impromptu speech. Was it good? It was so good. Oh, nice. So good. I love her. She's like literally my favorite human. That's amazing. So...
Also, if you want to meet my grandma, she went on my dad's podcast. Wow. Yeah, I'm trying to get her on mine, but she wasn't comfortable enough to come on mine yet. Oh. So I'm hoping the next time I'm home I can get her on now that she's like gone on my dad's. Yeah. But she's such a little cutie. That's awesome. So check that episode out. I'll link it in the description on this episode, but it was so good. I just love her. Yeah, yeah. What do you think the overall vote is on this one?
If she's the asshole? Yeah. You know, knowing Reddit, I feel like not the asshole. You would be correct in that. I just feel like I'm starting to get a sense for the people. For the people. For the people of Reddit. The top comment is, well, that's unfortunate that the day you got married, you found out your husband's always going to pick his mom over you. Such disrespect from mother-in-law, not the asshole. Yeah, again, like-
this is a personal thing. That's what I said. The first thing I said when I reacted was like, this is just hard because it's so personal. Some people see it as no big deal. Okay, there are worse things in life. And then some people are like, no, this is the tone of our marriage now. It's a preview into the battles I'm going to fight. I'm going to set my foot... Like, it's just...
Sometimes people need to learn consequences. So a husband who agreed beforehand no speeches should have gone up and taken the mic and said, you know what, mom, we said no speeches. Please respect us. Consequence. Like sometimes we have to parent our parents. Oh, totally. Like that's just the reality a lot of us live in. So I think like that is a good point where he.
could have been more on her side and probably should have been. Yeah. OP responds to that and goes, I really hope not. He has always said his mom is stubborn, etc. And that she did what she wanted. For me, it is no problem as long as she is willing to take the consequences of her stubbornness. I didn't know it meant that the rest of us should lay flat.
Yeah, I get it. I get it. I really do. It's tough. It would be really frustrating and you'd be like, really? You couldn't have my back on our wedding day? That is a good point. I would be – I would –
If this were me in this situation, I would be pissed at Justin for not having my back. But I would have also been more respectful. And that is just the thing. Like, am I going to bitch in private later? Yeah. A hundred percent. A little. But also at the same time, like,
Hey, she gave her speech and still didn't ruin your night. You said to yourself you had a fucking blast. Yes. So just pick your battles. Agreed. Well said. Pick your battles. Someone comments and it's got 11K upvotes, big red box. So it's got awards. People highlighted it. Whoa.
Whoa, okay. Yeah.
I don't know about all that. I'm quick to jump to divorce and I don't know if it's that serious. Yeah, I'm not there. I'm not there. I'm not there. Shocking for a lot of you out there. We're not there. Wow. Patience, baby. Patience. Look at us. Patient Polly's. I've come so far since I started this episode. Growth. Growth. We love it. What's it called? Character development.
All day, every day, baby. Always working to be better. No, that's to me and my... It's a little much. That's a little goofy. Reel it in a little bit. This person. How did I get so many awards? Yeah, whoa. If you rightfully decide you deserve someone better...
Imagine, hey, why'd you guys split? Oh, so his mom gave an impromptu speech at our wedding and he didn't shut it down. I think it's time for a serious conversation about enabling your mom. But imagine I had known my wedding, I had known my marriage, and you're like, oh, like, really? Like...
Yeah. Really? It is interesting. I mean, for some people, maybe that's again, context is everything. Yeah. If this was like the 100th time it's happened. Camel, straw, back. Yes. But it's like you're saying this is like what it's few and far between that. Yeah. Happens. Yeah. I wonder what the craziest reason someone has gotten an annulment for is.
Yeah. I saw a TikTok the other day. I fell down the rabbit hole on the cake cutting sword video. And I talked about it in an episode with Lauren a little bit ago. But this guy goes crazy and like he's cutting the cake with his bride and they both have their hands on the sword. And then all of a sudden he like starts hacking it and destroys the cake. What? Yeah. It's like the most. He just like what?
What happened? Destroys it. For fun? Yeah, I literally just put the video in the episode because I'm editing it right now so I can actually show you. And then just keeps hacking the cake. That's really weird. And then like everyone in the room gets quiet and like. Because they're all like. They're all like, what the fuck? Do you know how expensive a wedding cake is? Especially a three tiered buttercream like that. Yeah.
Don't fuck around with the cakes. So I did see someone duet it and goes, my ex-husband did this. I got an annulment the next day. You're lying. Swear to God. I mean, okay. So, okay. I'm just putting myself in that position and I just like can't imagine. Like I can't imagine getting that far with someone for it to like crumble over that. I think there's because of this video and something I also saw.
I've seen this concept of the shut up ring. And it's a proposal that comes from like nagging and being like, it's time to get married. Shit or get off the pot. Yeah. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. And so it's the shut up ring. And I think sometimes people will get these shut up rings, get married and then be like this.
this was not fucking worth it. Oh, for sure. This wasn't worth it. And it is kind of like we said, it's the straw that broke the camel's back. Yeah, that's a good point. That's a good point. Yeah. Wow. I have been on the craziest side of TikTok lately. Huh? Shut up rings, cake cutting. I kind of want to learn more about shut up rings. Send me some of those TikToks. Maybe I'll get on that side too. Yeah, I shall. Yeah, send me them. Oh, God. It's just a wild, wild thing. But moving along.
One of this week's partners is Vacation Friends 2. We all know that traveling rarely goes according to plan and oftentimes ends in chaos. Well, Vacation Friends 2 is no exception, and this movie may be more chaotic and unhinged than any of the stories we read on this show. This movie has an amazing cast, including Lil Rel Howery, Yvonne Orji, John Cena, Meredith Hagner, and Steve Buscemi, just to name a few. To give you a
quick scoop on the movie, it picks up a few months after the end of Vacation Friends. This hilarious sequel finds newly married couple Marcus and Emily inviting their uninhibited besties Ron and Kayla to join them for a vacation when Marcus lands an all-expenses-paid trip to a Caribbean resort. But Marcus's real reason for traveling there in the first place is to actually meet with the owners of the resort to bid on a construction contract for a hotel they own back in Chicago.
But when Kayla's incarcerated father, Reese, is released from San Quentin and shows up at the resort unannounced at the worst possible moment, things get a bit out of control, ruining Marcus's best laid plans and turning the Vacation Friends perfect trip into total chaos. Vacation Friends 2 is a movie you guys should not miss out on and is now streaming on Hulu. The trailer is also linked in this episode's description.
Get your popcorn ready, guys. It's a good one. This next story is brought to you guys by Vacation Friends 2. As you just heard, vacationing with friends can be chaotic, stressful. Sometimes it can end friendships even, or have you wondering why you even went on that vacation in the first place. So just think about Vacation Friends 2 and this next story and what they may have in common and get even more excited to watch it. Now streaming on Hulu.
So this next one is 25 days old. Lots of awards on it. It's coming from the username Vacation Slayer 238. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for Canceling Vacation Less Than 24 Hours In Due to My Kid's Behavior? It's giving I'm going to turn this car around vibe. Yes. Isn't it? Oh my God. My mom used to threaten that nonstop. I will turn this car around.
My husband and I have three kids, nine male, eight male, and three female. The boys have been driving us crazy. They fight like cats and dogs. We've had countless talks with them about respecting each other to no avail. I understand sibling rivalry, but it's gotten to the point it's disruptive to all of us every day.
I already told my husband last week I wasn't sure if the vacation was a good idea. My husband shut me down pretty much immediately, and things went ahead as planned. First of all, the three-and-a-half-hour car ride was, predictably, hell. Boys fighting and riling each other up the whole time. Husband and I kept trying to reassure each other that things would be better once we got there, and they would be too excited to cause trouble.
We were wrong. They had so many reminders of what not to do once we got to the rental house, so they do everything wrong from the get-go. Shoes on the white furniture? Check. Running in the house? Check. I turned my back for two seconds, and the eight-year-old threw a box of chalk in the pool to keep his brother from getting it. We went out to lunch, and they were out of control in the restaurant. Nine male ran away from us in a strange place because he didn't get his way.
We finally go to the beach and they are frankly being brats, refusing sunscreen, fighting over toys, pushing their luck repeatedly, going further and further out in the water than we told them to, cursing.
By the time we got back to the house, it was around dinner time and I was fed up. They were totally ruining it for everybody. Nothing had worked and I told my husband we needed to go home for the reasons mentioned above, mainly that they needed to see a real consequence.
My husband still insisted it would get better. I put my foot down and told him that I didn't even want to be there at this point, so either I was leaving or we all were. He got super pissed and told me it was ridiculous and unfair to our daughter. I actually agree with him, but saw no other choice at this point. Of course, when I tell the kids, they immediately burst into tears and are begging to stay, promising they will behave.
My mother, who came with us, was also near tears. She thinks her precious grandbabies do no wrong. She argued with me too, begging me to, quote, just let it go. But I refused to budge. So we left, less than 24 hours into a four-day vacation. Half the ride home was spent with them sobbing, and my husband pretty much gave me the silent treatment the whole way.
My mother decided to stay behind a little longer, but then started randomly texting me about 30 minutes in, asking if I was serious. She knew I was. And told me the whole reason she came was to spend time with the kids. So I had now, quote, ruined it for everybody. And they're only little once. Here we are the following evening, and pretty much no one likes me right now except my three-year-old. Are they right? Am I the asshole? Ooh.
My gut is to say no, not the asshole. This one's hot and it's going to be controversial because I don't know. I always get really nervous to weigh in on like parenting stories because obviously I'm not a parent. So it's like hard to speak from that position. But like I hear stories like this and I'm just –
I personally wouldn't stand for that type of behavior. Hell no. These are kids from hell. Exactly. And I know it's like, oh, but you say that now and then you have your kids. Okay. Got it. But from where I sit, like I just wouldn't deal with that. I would turn that car around for sure. Yeah. I don't care what guilt trip comes with it. My mom, if she's like, I came here to spend time with my kids, get in the car, mom, let's go. You can spend time with them four hour drive back. Like come home, spend time with them at home. But they don't, they have not earned this vacation. Yeah.
Like this behavior, that's not how life works. And I feel like your job as a parent, again, in my opinion, is to raise kids that are going to be good adults. And they're going to be respectful little adults, right? Yeah. And so this is to enable that behavior and just let it go, in my opinion, again, is like doing them a disservice in the long run.
And you're kind of just enabling this bad behavior and this bratty, entitled, selfish, misbehaved. That's really terrible. I mean, like, that sounds miserable. Nothing about that sounds like a vacation for the parents. No. That's not a way to... You shouldn't put yourself through that. Oh, my gosh. No. I just have so much. Like, you made such amazing points. And I think they're...
the way they are because they've been enabled so much. And so now's the time. They're still young. They're nine and eight. They're still very impressionable. This is your last shot to start instilling some respect and some discipline in them because once they get to 12 years old, there's no more parenting. It becomes different. Yes, it's parenting.
per se, but I've seen a lot on it where there's a difference between being a parent and super like restrictive or being more of a parent. That's a guide where your, your kids from 12 to 18, that's their time to learn and learn from their mistakes and,
not so much the parenting and you're going to do this and not that formative years yeah so I'm like this is 100% reasonable I think this is the most amazing decision yeah what I find so funny about this is everyone saying you're ruining this for us yeah it's your fault yeah
she gave everyone involved a choice yeah you can stay i cannot be here anymore how funny is that that dad didn't want to parent by himself for a weekend why didn't he take her up on that oh grandma you want to spend time with them great have them all to yourself go at it go at it yeah
So funny that they're blaming her when really they're the ones that couldn't handle the heat in the kitchen. They said, you're right. Here's my scapegoat. I'm going to let you, you know, ruin everything. But.
Like they had a choice and they could have stuck around and hung out. She could have taken the three year old and had her own little vacation with a three year old. Agreed. Then it's fair for the daughter. Oh, this is so unfair for our daughter. Yeah, she's three. She's three. She's going to have a good time anywhere. Also, it's like you're a family.
families win together, families lose together. I think it's a good lesson to teach the three-year-old too. Like, hey, we all... We're in this together. You know, like, if everyone's not going to get it together, it's kind of like if we can't all agree, no one gets the toy. So learn to compromise. And same with the boys. The boys need to be held accountable too. They're older. I just...
When you're telling the story, I hate to sound judgmental, but I just can't help but wonder, like, how does that happen? Like, genuinely, that's a question. I'm not even like trying to pass judgment. Yeah. How does that happen? Like, are your kids just sometimes have this behavior that you just cannot control? Or is this the result of...
A parenting style? Is it that you've let them get away with things that you let it go long enough to where now they've developed habits and entitlement? I don't, I genuinely don't know the answer to this because I hear these stories and I'm like,
How did this little being control you? How did this happen? I think especially I wonder that same thing because I grew up with such a disciplinary mom. Like I got soap in my mouth. I got a wooden spoon on my ass. Like your mom's Latina. Literally. So it's like my mom might as well have been Latina because she had the same energy. Like, oh, you're going to get the chancla. Like it was that energy. I did not stand a chance. No. And so you didn't step out of line. No. No.
I know now, like, there's a lot of research that says, like, there's better methods of parenting. For sure. Like, authoritative parenting is better, which is gentle, but, like, actually... Yeah. Yeah, it's good. So I get that it's different, but, like, I do wonder how does it get like this? And...
are they just nine and eight year old boys? And that this is just how boys are at this age. I would love for like parenting experts or like child psychologists to like chime in. Please. I would love that. Because it's an open-ended question. I genuinely have always wondered when I see it,
when I witness it, when I hear about it, I'm like, how did that happen? Is that your parenting style? Are they hardwired a certain way? Like, again, it's hard for me to understand because there was no room for that behavior. Like my mom had me so tight. She could shoot me a look if we were in public. It was a look.
and I knew I was about to get my ass beat if I tried anything and I it was enough the look was enough for me to like button up yeah and like yeah of course there's better methods she regrets some of it but like
I just can't imagine being that defiant. My mom would cut that so quickly. Well, and on the flip side, how do you manage kids like this to make things a teaching moment? I look at this situation and I think not the asshole. This is an amazing teaching moment for the boys, for the daughter as well. Kids learn from modeled behavior. The daughter just got to see these consequences play out. Act bad, no vacation. So she's learning as well. Learning experience for everyone. Totally.
And if this isn't the way, then what is? What is? Or what are the alternatives? I'd love to hear, like you said, from a parenting, sex college expert, what was the right way? Like, I know it's subjective, but I just genuinely don't know. It's hard. I'm not a parent. I don't know. If it were me...
believing what I believe in my philosophies and the way that I was raised, I would have done exactly what she did. Yeah. Exactly what she did. You are the mother of this family. You have raised these children. And it is if you decide that you want to cut a vacation so you can teach them a lesson and help guide them. And OK, are the kids paying for the vacation? No. No.
Like I'm disappointed in the husband for not having her back a little bit more, to be honest, and being a little bit more like a fourth child pretty much. Well, and that's the point too with him not staying. And then giving her the silent treatment. He should have supported her. Also, what lesson are you teaching your children now? You're not a united front. Just suck it up. You can go when you get home behind closed doors, be like, I'm really bummed. I really wish we could have worked out a way to stay. Babe, you had the option to stay. But in front of the kids, you support her decision.
mom has spoken. We're getting in the car. We're going home. Yeah. And I'm going to support this decision. Absolutely. And then later be like, why'd we do that? Like, you know, but like teacher, you're showing your kids, like mom and like even dad's on our side.
And now you're making mom to be the enemy. Yeah. Well, and I also, I do wonder if mom would have left, how would these kids have acted? How would the trip have gone with dad and grandma? I wish that would have been the outcome here. I honestly don't know if I do wish for that because I genuinely think that could have been so destructive. It's not even safe. Maybe. I mean, them going out into the water. Right. There's a pool. Dude.
I think it was the beach, which is like, there's rip currents. They threw it in the chalk in the pool. The chalk was in the pool, but then I think they went to the beach as well. And so it's like, we went to the beach and they were going further and further out in the water. There are rip tides out there. Those kids would be gone so fast. Like, that's not to fuck around. So yeah, like to your point, it could have been dangerous. Could have been bad. But...
It's dad's turn to parent. True. Maybe dad would have learned. Dad's going to fuck around and find out sometimes. And I don't want the kids to get injured, but like, I don't know, like go put a disguise on like Kim Kardashian in the bush looking at North. Like, I don't know what, but like she shouldn't have to do that. But again, it's just like, I wish that in a lot of these stories that like the dads would just like buck up, like,
Yeah. Find out. Yeah. You want to stay and you're going to blame me and give me the silent treatment? I'm not making this decision. I gave you a choice. You were a participant in this. Yeah. It's almost like they forced her hand. They did. She didn't want to. She didn't just wake up on the wrong side of the bed and say, you know, I've decided we're going to cut this short because I feel like being mean. Yeah. She...
They're out of control. That's not a vacation for anybody. No. The top comment on this is snorts a line of birth control. I'm sorry, but like I was like, wow. I was just recently like maybe like maybe I'm stepping into my motherhood era. Wrong.
I hear stories like this and I'm like, it's just so hard. Like, make me want kids because it's not these stories, ain't it? The next comment down is hijacking the top comment to say, mama, you should take your little one out for a girl's night out and let dad and grandma deal with the boys or offer separate trips. Sucks, I know, but we're trying to teach a valuable lesson here, lol. Betcha they'll be talking about implementing discipline by the time you get back.
Edit to add, holy balls. I go to bed, wake up and have almost 6K likes. And my first award, Reddit never ceases to amaze me. They now have 23K upvotes. Wow. There are no comments from OP. I don't know if we have any child psychologists that have chimed in. I'm going to give a quick search and see. Yeah, I am curious. I don't know. Whenever I see these situations, I'm like, I don't know what you do.
Well, there is a comment that says, absolutely. We would have backed the truck up and gone home if this is how they behave too. My dad always would say to us, you can do anything you want. You just have to deal with the consequences. That's right. That's the way the world works.
My dad has this famous little saying he loves called the Oh Well Clause. You know, if you don't listen, oh, oh, well, you're going to have to deal with the consequences. The Oh Well Clause. And this is a case of the Oh Well Clause. Yeah. It's I mean, not to sound silly, but it really is like a fuck around and find out. It's kind of like, yeah, you have free will. You can do what you want, but it doesn't mean you're going to get what you want. I don't see anyone. Yeah.
Chiming in, saying they're a child psychologist or...
anything like that so I don't think we have anyone yet so if we have any listeners that could provide some insight or even just a mom yeah been in a situation like this you had to make this decision well and all kids have meltdowns right all kids are gonna have chaotic crazy bad days but like this is their life yeah like this isn't a bad day of kids not listening because they're
overstimulated, overwhelmed, tired, hungry, whatever. This is repetitive bad behavior. Well, these kids are straight up based on what they're sharing. These kids are straight up not taking you seriously. Yeah. They have no fear of consequence. They have no fear of punishment.
They don't see you as an authoritative figure. They don't respect you. Nope. So I don't know if this is years and years of parenting and she just like is like enough is enough or I don't know if I don't know. Yeah, I will say I went on like a little weekend vacation with Justin's mom's side and she has four stepchildren.
who are ages like 16 and three triplet boys who are all 15. They're triplet boys? I thought it was two boys, one girl. No, one girl, three boys. So the girls, the three boys are triplets and then a girl? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So they all like, it's so crazy because they all have their own each very different personalities. And even like hanging out with them, you do see that like
They are a little like antagonistic of each other. Like one of them had a pair of goggles in the pool and the other wanted it and the other one wasn't ready to give them up yet. So the one that wanted it literally broke them. Oh, yeah. And so it's kind of the same thing of like throwing the box of chalk in the pool. It's like sometimes these kids are going to just be little shitheads. But like...
okay, how do you work on? No, we're going to share with your brother. You take half the chalk. He takes half the chalk. And like, there was nothing she could have done in that moment. She turned around and he did it. But it goes back to like those basic core principles of like teaching a child to share, to cooperate, patience. Patience, but also like teaching them deterrence, right? Like you want to instill a sense of
responsibility in them to where the child is going to think twice if I throw this box of chalk in the pool mom is going to be upset and she's going to take something away yeah and no one's gonna win it's like I don't want to say and still fear in them no but a little bit of like deterrence like yes okay that's not a good idea because it's gonna end badly for me and so yeah he's doing that because he's thinking nothing's gonna happen
Well, and something I just heard recently, and it was like a teacher talking about how teaching over the past decade has like changed drastically for her. And she's like, I can tell the kids that get iPads at home and the kids that don't get iPads at home. The kids that get iPads are crazy.
Like to put it. Yeah. Concisely. Yeah. And the kids that don't get iPads at home have better social skills, are more patient, are better behaved, all of these things. And essentially she was saying like,
We need to teach our kids it's okay to be bored. Yeah, that is so true. I think we need to teach adults that. It is okay to be bored. Yeah, I think everyone can learn that lesson. It's okay to be bored. Yeah. But definitely kids because it's, you know. Also, something I just thought of in my head, I know like obviously take everything we're saying with a grain of salt because we aren't parents. Right. But like I could be a parent tomorrow.
And I would be starting with the knowledge base I have now. Right. You only know what you know and you learn by finding out. Yes. I love, I live and breathe by that. You only know what you know and you don't know what you don't know. Yeah. The other day I found out that you can't give newborns water. Yeah. Okay. Everyone's like, yeah, obviously. And I'm like, what do you mean? Obviously. Like who, where's that seminar that like teaches you that guess what? You can't feed your newborns water. Like I'm not pregnant. Do they tell you this stuff before you leave the hospital?
Correct. Maybe they do. I don't think they do because I literally saw a video from someone that was like,
okay, so I can just take this thing home? Well, yeah. Where are the instructions? Right. Maybe they do, maybe they don't. I can't speak to that. Haven't been there yet. But like from where I sit, back to the you only know what you know, how would I know that? I haven't had one. You know what I mean? It's a wild west shit when you have a baby. Right. And then I'm sure you learn as you go. It's like anything else. Like, well, you didn't know this about horses? No. But then you start to ride horses and you learn, right? It's like any other thing in life. But with
With children, it happens so fast. Like you said, I could get pregnant tomorrow, become a mother in whatever, nine months, 10 months, pop a baby out. I can choose to read books or not. I can choose to ask for advice or not. A lot of that is self-taught. There's no government mandate that you have to learn. And then all of a sudden you have birth in the hospital. Again, I don't know. Do they give you a little pamphlet? Do they give you a little rundown? Probably not. And then you go home and you're just-
We got a lot of people that have had kids that listen. Tell us. Tell us how it goes. Do you get a tutorial? Did they show you how to change a diaper in the hospital? How does it go? Please let us know. Yeah. We need so many responses on this story. Yeah. Let's see it. And we are opening the door for that because we are the first ones to admit that we are not parents. So we don't. This is a tough one. Like, yeah.
Oh, man. It's going to be a while. My neighbor, though, he came over to look at my house because we're like starting a demo. And he's like, is this going to be a little nursery soon? And I'm like, not anytime soon. You can't say that shit in 2023, man. We stopped doing that. Remember, what's her face? Vanessa Lachey. Yeah. Torn apart. You can't just start asking people when they're going to start having kids. Not everyone wants kids. Not everyone can have kids. So keep it to yourself. Let's not do that. Okay. Moving along. Okay.
Another one of this week's partners is Skims. You guys know that I was a big Skims holdout, but I have changed my tune and I'm completely obsessed. Not only did Skims send me some goodies, but I went above and beyond. I went shopping, you guys. And with all of the compliments I've gotten on my Skims purchase, I feel like it's paid for them. Every collection I've tried has been incredible, but this cotton collection is like no other. And it makes sense why Skims nailed it, because Skims is creating the next generation of loungewear for every person.
body. I've tried a little bit of everything from this cotton collection, from the shorts to the t-shirt to the tank top, and everything fits so well and is so flattering. If you saw the episode with me and Dacen a few back, you saw me wearing that cotton t-shirt. And if you didn't know, this is Skimm's most tagged collection.
It's made with a classic cotton fabric for comfortable everyday wear. And seriously, every day. You can wear it while you're lounging at home or keep it on when you go out. It's super versatile. It's made from ultra soft and natural fibers. The cotton collection features elevated lounge pieces designed for comfort indoors and outside.
Whoever said loungewear was only for the house hasn't tried Skims. And it's available in sizes extra, extra small to 4X. There's something for everyone. So if you're ready to try it for yourself, believe the hype. Skims has over 100,000 five-star reviews for a reason.
The Cotton Collection, and more are available now at Skims.com. Plus, get free shipping on orders over $75. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you, select podcast in the survey, and select our show in the drop-down menu that follows. Thank you.
Okay, so for this next one, it was posted five days ago in AITAH, Am I the Asshole, basically. Uh-huh. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for showing up to guy's night after my husband didn't come home when he said he would. My husband has been hanging out with his guy friends every weekend for about a month.
It generally doesn't bother me at all, but lately he has been saying, quote, I will be home after this beer. And that one beer turns into six and him coming home in an Uber around 3 to 4 a.m.
And well, I want to hang out with my husband. There's never any ill blood or fighting about it. I know he needs his friends as we are currently going through a stressful time and he needs to decompress. However, when he went out on Saturday, I told him, quote, if you aren't home by eight, I'm coming to find your ass. He laughed, said he would be home by eight. And that was it.
Well, by nine, he still wasn't home. I knew this was going to happen, so I planned it all out. I'd already gone to the store and picked up a 30 rack. And this is actually kind of embarrassing, but I threw on some of his clothes, put my hair up and put a hat on to make myself look more manly and headed over to his buddy's house where I knew he was.
When I walked through the door, my husband starts dying laughing and bear hugs me. His buddies, I'm close to three of them, were also heavily amused and thanked me for the beer. There was no issue there. However, one of the guys that I don't know all that well lives next door, and his wife came over livid at like 2 a.m. and starts scolding him about being out so late, etc., etc. They have a baby at home, so it's 100% understandable."
As soon as she saw me standing there, shit hit the fan even more. She started accusing him of lying about it, being guys night. I did interject and say that I actually invited myself after my own husband didn't come home when he said, but she just put her hand up to me and told her husband to get home. I thought that would be the end of it, but my husband actually got a text from this guy yesterday saying that me showing up caused serious issues in his marriage and that
And that next time he should tell me to, quote, stay the fuck home. My husband obviously laughed it off and said it isn't my fault there's issues in their marriage and that he was amused by me showing up. But now I feel utterly terrible. Am I the asshole? No.
I don't think so. Bro. No, like that is a personal issue between them and their marriage. This clearly isn't the first time something like this has happened. I mean, I wouldn't think you would have that reaction.
No, it sounds like this is kind of an issue. It sounds like this is kind of an issue for all these guys. They're all hanging out together every weekend, not going home when they say they're going home. So it sounds like a group issue. And this guy that's got the new baby is 100% in the wrong. I think they all are, especially like OP's husband. I feel like this...
I take two ways. It's super funny. She showed up dressed like a guy, case of beer, like joining boys night. Boys night. Yeah. Like that's super fun. But at the same time, I'm like,
okay he said he was gonna be home by eight and he wasn't and there seems to be a little disrespect yeah or he was like trying your ass like he totally he was pushing your limits to see what he could get away with or like if you'd hold true to your word and show up yeah so I'm like
I have mixed feelings a little bit. But that's not really the issue. The question is if she's like an asshole for the... For showing up. ...in the other marriage, right? No. No? No. She has what she feels bad about. Yeah. So in my opinion, I mean, I agree. And I've had a boyfriend who was like that. And it's just so annoying because it's like, are you just testing the limits? But I guess...
The good news is that at least you know he's telling the truth. Like, he's not, you know, you hear of these, like, affairs, whether you see them in shows or movies or you even hear about it in real life, where they say they're staying out with the boys. They come home two, three hours later than they said they were going to. Lo and behold, they're not at boys' night. Boys' night is actually...
Some other girl. Taking a girl home to a hotel, whatever they're doing. Oh my God. I just saw a TikTok about this guy who texted his girlfriend like, oh, I'm going to Taylor Swift with the boys. No, he took another girl. And she's like, we've been dating for three years. Don't bring Taylor Swift into this. I would just discombobulate his shit. I would go nuts.
I literally, I decided I'm going. The fact that he took her to Taylor Swift. Like he didn't just take her to- It wasn't a Drake concert. Well, I mean, Drake, come on. Drake still too. But like he didn't, taking her to dinner would be bad enough. But he took her to a Taylor Swift concert. Taylor Swift. That's so disrespectful. That's probably the biggest. That's insult to injury. Yeah.
That is terrible. But I think this happens a lot. Yeah, it does. Guys night. Guys night. It's an easy cop out. You're like, good, go have fun, whatever. So I guess at least you know your man is like acting correctly and he's with his guys. I think it's kind of cute that he's had... Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe I've been out of a relationship for too long. But I think it's kind of cute that they're having so much fun that they're just like... It's disrespectful, especially with the guy who's a dad to a baby. Disrespectful. I don't care how much fun you're having. Time...
time to go home. Be a partner. Be a partner. Be a dad. Be an adult. Grow up. Go home, honey. Like whatever. Yes. But to answer this, I guess to stay on track, I don't think she's an asshole. There's clearly vulnerabilities between that other couple's marriage. And this was maybe like the straw that broke the camel's back. Clearly she was livid and
And that's an issue they need to work out. She didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she showed up to boys night uninvited, but it was a joke. It was in jest. She knows a lot of his friends. They can all attest to the fact that she came up uninvited. The guy didn't lie about girls being there. It's like if she doesn't want to hear it the way she stuck her hand out, that's on her.
Yeah, that was a little rude on her part. I also think the minute that that other wife showed up, he probably could have called her and been like, hey, babe, if you want to, you know, bring the baby over and have a beer, come on over. True. They're neighbors. She lives right next door. It's a walk away. Guys don't think like that. Why don't they? I don't know. Guys don't. I'm sorry, guys, but they don't think like that. Okay. This is something I constantly talk to Justin about.
And he gets a little peeved. I think it might be one of the icks I give him. Really? Let's hear it. But I always say when we're people watching or if he does something, I always say, you know, that's the difference between girl brain, boy brain. Yeah. Like we were at the beach the other night watching the meteor shower and I
A couple was walking by where our chairs are set, you know, kind of back like in a decent spot. You have two choices. Walk directly in front of us where we're staring, looking for the stars or walk behind us. It's the same distance. Yeah. The girl decided to walk behind us. The guy didn't give a fuck if he interrupted our view. And I literally turned to him. I go, that's an example. Girl brain, boy brain. Yeah. And that does happen or like.
Guys will have plans with their friends and their friends are bringing a girlfriend. And then you're like, oh, well, what are you doing tonight? And he's like, oh, well, drinks at six. You're highly encouraged to come. And I go, it's 530. Literally. What? Guys don't think. Guys don't think like that. Sorry. Sorry. I know that's going to hurt some feelings. But hey, we have a lot of people that listen with their partners. So I think it's just like now that you're aware, like a lot of times you're not aware until you're aware. So think about this, guys. Like,
A little consideration goes a long way. They just, yeah. I don't know. That doesn't surprise me at all. Like at all that in that moment he didn't think to call his wife or his, yeah. Yeah. At all. I'd be more surprised if he did. Like when men do do those things, I'm like, oh my gosh. Yeah.
You're so thoughtful. And it's like you're just like doing the bare minimum. The bare minimum. I know. So there isn't like an overall vote on this one. A lot of the comments I'm seeing, though, are not the asshole. The top comment is, it seems that your actions were deemed highly amusing by everybody, including your husband.
Except that one guy and his wife. Your presence there had nothing whatsoever to do with Mr. Dumbass's marital status. That's all on him. He just lashed out at you because he got caught and is probably scared of his wife. Yeah. Not the asshole. And maybe you should dress up again and join hubby for the next boys night. I love that move. I think it's hilarious. However, I do think she needs to have a conversation with him.
Because even though it was made into a joke, like the principle is that he specifically said he was going to be home by 8 p.m. Yeah, that's where I'm at. He wasn't. So like, yeah, we can laugh it off. But at the same time, you're kind of downplaying it and making it into a joke, which was the point. But at the same time, does it bother you or does it not? Because you need to be clear on where you're standing. Yeah. Like this is funny the one time. But if this continues to happen again and again and again, it's not funny.
It's not cute and funny. It's disrespectful. Oh, totally. I remember one time my boyfriend came home at 4 a.m. He was going to be home at like 10. What? How does that happen? Exactly. I was livid. And the audacity of this man had to be like, what's the big deal? And I was like, you're out of your mind. Like you're actually out of your mind. Where were you for those six hours? Literally. Literally.
At the party. Oh, cool. On like a Tuesday. I'm like, really? Nothing is open in LA until 4 a.m. I think it was like a house party. Of course it was. How convenient for us. I know. I know. So convenient. I know. Oh my God. But yeah, I completely agree. Um,
The other comment under that is, I bet that one guy was cool with it until his wife showed up. And I get that. Like, everyone needs space away from their partners. So her showing up the one time, yeah, I don't think I would show up every time. And yeah, decompress, you know, hang out with your friends. But okay, this is...
Four weekends in a row, and then you say you're coming home, but you're not. And, okay, it's getting annoying. Grow up. Just a little. Yeah. Okay, moving along. Yes. COVID-19 viruses like me change to fool your immune system and make you sick. But updated vaccines help protect you. Stay up to date on COVID-19 and flu vaccinations. Sponsored by Champions for Vaccine Education, Equity, and Progress.
Okay, so this next one is two months old, coming from Am I the Asshole? It is titled, Am I the Asshole for Jumping Off a Train Before the Doors Closed and Abandoning My Pregnant Wife. What?
I know the title sounds crazy. I'll try to explain this as best I can. I'm 29 and my wife is 25. She's also five months pregnant. Recently, we decided to go on holiday together. Nothing fancy, just to the coast, which meant we had to get a train. We had maybe three rolling suitcases and one of those army style backpacks.
There was no issue as we boarded the train and we sat down and put the luggage next to us. About 20 minutes into our journey, we heard an announcement over the speakers that the train was being diverted, which meant it wasn't going to stop at the station we needed anymore. As it was saying this, the train was coming to a stop at the next station. I panicked and told my wife we had to get off or we weren't going to be able to get to where we needed.
I got up and started grabbing our things and rushed off the train. I couldn't believe it when I looked around and saw she hadn't gotten off. She was trying to grab our third suitcase. I had the other two and the backpack. Unfortunately, it was too late. And even as I rushed to the doors, they closed. My wife looked like she wanted to kill me and the train pulled away with her on it.
Can't you just envision her face standing there? Yes. Like this is a movie. Yes. I can picture it. I called her to tell her to get off at the next stop and I'd get the next one and meet her. But she was absolutely irate and told me the holiday was canceled and she was going home. To top it off, she told her family and mine and they're all furious at me for abandoning a pregnant woman on a train headed to God knows where.
Unless I'm missing something, this was an honest mistake.
It could. Like, yeah. I don't know. Did he forget the third suitcase? Did he assume she was going to get it? That's the gray area for me. But like, because she's pregnant. Like, but there's only so many suitcases one can grab at a time. So I don't know what their understanding was. Like, was she responsible for that third suitcase? Was that her like her thing was did he genuinely forget about it? And she saw it. Like, that's where I'm like, I don't know. Yeah. But.
To me, this seems like just an honest mistake. Like, I know he probably should have made sure she got off first. That's probably the right thing to do. Yeah. In my mind. Five months pregnant. He should have made sure she got off first. Yeah. But I feel like he was kind of like acting under pressure and like kind of just fucked up. Like, did he do the right thing? No, but he kind of fucked up. I guess I'm just curious like how he got so far away from the train before he realized she wasn't there. What do you mean how far away? Well, like.
Everyone handles things differently. But if this were me and I was with a partner that was like a little slower, whether it be pregnant, crutches, whatever, I wouldn't get so far away from them. But how far did he get? I mean, he was so far that he saw by the time he got wherever the fuck he went, he turned around, saw she was still trying to get up with the suitcase and
And he ran back to try to put his hand in the door and he didn't have enough time. I'm picturing just him like getting off the train. And turning around right away? No, I think he zoomed like further than the door. Why?
That's what I would like to know. If this were me and I was traveling with someone, like I said, that was a little needed a little more time. I would get to the door and whether it's my suitcase or my body, lean up against the door or block the door so it doesn't shut. Like those train doors don't shut if something's in the way. And the train, it might be trying to leave, but it's not going to leave until all of its doors are shut. They won't shut if someone's in the front of them. I feel like they do. No. If you...
Like if you have your arm in there, it's not going to like fully close and just zoom away with your arm in it. Will it open back up? Yeah. Like an elevator door? Yeah. It like hits and opens. Okay. So it's like you have a little like block the door and give her some time. We're envisioning different things. Yeah. And we don't know. And I don't know how we know which one happened. But like I pictured like because I'm picturing I was just in Europe, you know, like the train you get off.
And like, again, we don't know how much time this really was, but I'm picturing he's got all of his shit off was on the landing and like turned around and she was like scrambling and he was probably like, come on. And then by the time she got to the door, it closed. So I wasn't picturing him like running off like 10 feet or a hundred feet and then being like, oh, where are you? You know, in my mind, I saw him getting off the train on the landing and
directly turning around pretty much like maybe getting like a little further away just he's not like right there and then just turning around and being like oh come on come on and then like the door closes post the the footage we want the footage i want the cctv footage run the tapes i don't know again like maybe this we're getting into the lost in the sauce here but probably i guess my overall my overall take is that it just seems like a stupid mistake it seems like a stupid move
Yeah, I am. I honestly had to Google five months pregnant woman just to see like the symptoms and like signs because I'm like, how big is five months? Yeah, because like I think even like early pregnancies, you have less energy, move slower, you're tired, moody, whatever. Yeah. Five months pregnant, lower back pain, swollen feet.
practice contractions, restless nights, pregnancy brain, moodiness. And then I was like, okay, well, what does it look like though? Like how big is the bump? Everyone's different. Everyone is so different. I mean, I have a friend that didn't find out she was pregnant until six months. Exactly. She didn't have a bump. Yeah. But like,
A lot of the pictures, a lot of the pictures have a decent bump. But this to me is like a little bit of a moot point. Like my cousin that I was just with is six months pregnant and she was rolling her own suitcase on vacation just now. Yeah, no. And I'm not saying they can't. She's incapable. It depends, right? Like everyone's symptoms are gonna be different. Maybe someone at six months is like, there's no way in hell I'm going to drag a suitcase. That baby's pretty big at five months. Yeah. I mean, it's not, it's not not big, but that's not the question here. Like,
We don't know. Like maybe she was one of those really capable pregnant women. I was just trying to research for more context. Yeah. I mean, because I was just with someone traveling who was six months pregnant. Yeah. You saw her first hand. I have a really good picture of what like this probably kind of looks like. Yeah. And I'm like, I saw her and like she was fine.
Like she was rolling her suitcase. Like she was good. Again, everyone's different. Oh my God. You know? So different. My friend Allie is pregnant with her second baby and she's had crazy shit this time around where her placenta kind of detached a little bit and she was bleeding. And so she's like not allowed to pick up her toddler. And it's like,
how do you avoid picking up a toddler? Yeah. It's so hard, but it's like, she's still tiny, but having like those crazy symptoms, it's just like, oh, it's so nuts. But top comment on this one, you're the asshole.
Not surprised. Why panic over something so little? You could have just stayed on the train and discussed with your wife what you guys were going to do. You sound like one of those people that would reverse on the highway because you took the wrong exit instead of just taking the safer but longer way around. Has anyone done that? I have seen it. You've seen people reverse on the highway. I've seen it so many times. In Los Angeles. All the time. Reverse. Yep.
Like they're on the 405 and they reverse. Not the 405, the 101, 100%. Especially if there's lanes. What's the one? The 10. The 10 is one too where there's lanes on the 10 that are sometimes passed through. So it'll say exit. And then even if you're not exiting on that exit, you can still drive through and get back on the highway. Or there's lanes that will say exit only. Okay.
very distinct difference. California highways all suck ass. Uh-huh. And so I've seen people literally that like accidentally go on the exit only and go on the shoulder in reverse until they get enough to cut across. I've never seen such a thing. Oh, and I've seen someone like last minute like they're in the lane and then they go. Oh, I've seen that. And then almost hit the little water. Oh, yeah. I've seen that many, many times. Just miss it. That I've seen like. Just miss it. Yeah. It's not going to kill you. The reverse. That is like a like you're as a death sentence. Why would you do that?
would you do that? No, that is crazy. These freeways in California are violent and like they're so dangerous out here. Take the L. You have to take the L. Like it's five more minutes. It could well, it could be no time change. I've missed an exit in L.A. and literally added 18 minutes. Totally depends. Totally. But like it's not worth risking your life. No, never. I always have to remind myself. And what? OK, I'm 20 minutes late. That sucks.
Better than the alternative like dead right or like injured or whatever or hurt someone else. I completely agree. You have to remind yourself like what's the price of this weird move. But yeah I mean I don't think he's like a freaking hero. I do think like he's an idiot for sure. Yeah. I just don't know if it's like OK like wow you're the worst you're a terrible husband terrible father.
I don't know. I just... In this situation, you're the asshole. Yeah. The comment after that one is, if it was as easy for OP's wife to get off at the next stop and take another train to meet him again, then they could have both done this and stayed together. Yeah. And then someone goes, he said he would take the next train to meet her. He still is an ass with anxiety disorder. I wouldn't go so far to say that. I think he just...
Well, that's even more. I mean, I am actually holding a little bit more empathy than if we think he has an anxiety disorder. No, and I don't. We have no idea. I think that person's going a little far to diagnose him in this one circumstance. I think he just is a bad traveler. Yeah, maybe. And there's a lot of those people out there. Yeah, some people just... He's giving airport dad energy where they need to show up to a flight four hours early. Not even that, because that's just like, that doesn't really hurt anybody. He's giving...
You're in seat number like 27 and you're getting up and trying to like rush off the plane and like sir There's an order to de-planing. Please. There's an etiquette. Why do people stand up right away? I don't know at the back of the plane. I don't know It's like you're not gonna make this move any faster Like there's 26 rows before you that need to grab their luggage and get off I have seen so many people from like the last row Try to get up and run up the aisle as fast as they can. I just try to do that recently
Did you have a... I had to pee. I was panicking. Oh. I was panicking. I almost, I literally almost said to everybody, I'm so sorry. I need to get off this plane right now. Why didn't you go in the plane bathroom? Because I think I was like in the middle to where it was like to get to a plane. I think I was like row 14 or something where I'm like... Oh, yeah. You know, I'm like at this point, I just need to get the frick off the plane. And I almost, like I tried and I was going to be like, you guys, I'm really sorry. I just forget.
I gotta put me first. Dude, I literally had to be a flight attendant again recently on a flight. It was so, so brutal. We were, oh God, where were we going from? I think we were traveling from New York to,
LaGuardia to MSP and it was... I think it was a Delta flight because I've been flying a lot of Delta lately. But essentially, the flight was delayed leaving LaGuardia and over half the plane had transfers. So they needed to race to another flight. A lot of these people only had 40 minutes. And so...
I told the lady next to me, I was like, oh, well, you should ask the flight attendant when she is taking your trash on approach check. Just say, hey, I have a connecting flight. Is there any way you could make an announcement to let those with connecting flights off first? The flight attendant literally told her, no, we don't do that. Wow. It's a lie. Wow. It's so fucking easy to do. And then they get towards the end. And sure enough, they do finally make an announcement because I think,
Again, over half the flight transfers, like more people were asking. We park. Literally everyone starts trying to get off and the flight attendant standing there and there's a guy yelling in the back. He's like, hey, I have a transfer. Like, can you guys sit back down? Like, I have to go. Flight attendant sitting there just watching him and literally doing nothing.
Everyone starts making their way off. And then the rest of the plane at the back is like standing there like deer in headlights. No one's moving. So I literally peer over and I'm like, hey, anyone else back there have connecting flights?
Yeah. No? Okay. Like, come on. Yeah. Yeah. The flight attendant's literally like... Oh my gosh. Everyone around me was like, thank you. Like, thank you. Yeah. I wasn't like overstepping because there was literally no one to overstep. Yeah. And everyone was like, thank you. And I'm like, it's not... Yeah. That's crazy. But hey...
There's a lot of crazy shit happening on planes. There is. Flight attendants are tired. Yeah. COVID made people fucking crazy on planes. So I get it. Yeah. You see that lady trying to saran wrap her seats? I don't know if I did.
Again, I need to get off. Do you see that on TikTok? Yeah, I'm on there. I'm on there too much. This lady paid for three seats, brought a roll of saran wrap and saran wrapped her whole like cocoon. Oh my gosh. It was insane. Honestly, nothing. I think about this every time because I just flew back from Mexico last week. Every time I travel, nothing. And I mean nothing in this world. Maybe this is a stupid thing to say.
motivates me more to be a freaking millionaire than traveling. That is, I don't know why. Like, I'm just like, like I'm an ordinary person with ordinary, simple wants and needs. But when I travel, I'm like, oh, I just, oh, I just hate it. I hate everything about it. That? Waiting in lines, getting stuck on planes, being told I can't pee because we're taxiing. Like,
checking my luggage, having to have it. Like all of it. It's just a commercial flight. It's just, I hate it. Nothing motivates me more. That is the one area where I will always have patience. Yeah. I love traveling. Yeah. Hey, we got a four-hour delay coming back from Iceland. I'm stuck in Boston for four hours. Whatever. Yeah. I love traveling for the record. Yeah. I just don't like...
Inefficiencies. I... Yeah, that's... That's where I get killed. And that is traveling. Every flight I've had lately has had delays. I'm like, you know, it's cool. Like, I'm chilling. I'm going to go grab a cookie and... But if you've got places to be and things to do... 100%. It's frustrating. It's really stressful. Yeah. But I just have this mentality of like, there's nothing I can do about this. There's nothing you can do. I'm just going to enjoy the ride. I'll get there. If it's meant to be, I'll get there. No, it's true. There's nothing you can do. And I've adopted that mentality too. I just like... I see now why...
certain people take their travel so seriously. I never understood the people who like, I've never, I've never paid for like an expensive seat or anything. I've never done that. Yeah. Um,
And I never understood it. I'm like, we're all going to the same place. Like, yeah, you know, but now I kind of I'm like, OK, I see these efficiencies and I know that it's a privilege. I know that it's not cheap. Travel these days is not cheap. Yeah. On top of that, trying to travel in a way that's more efficient. It costs you money. Oh, pay for priority boarding, pay for, you know, first class or business or whatever. They nickel and dime you every chance. Yeah. Pay to select your seat so you can get the seat that you want closer to the front.
And like, it's just, oh my gosh, travel just at the one time where I'm like, oh, why can't I just like have a plane? I know I'll never have a plane, but like, you know what I mean? It's like that crazy delusional. No, I mean, it's not like, to be honest, you do need money. Oh, you need a lot of money. So you need privilege. But I don't have that for the record. Well, Justin's friend, Austin, he got his pilot's license and a plane for a total of
Again, this is out of the question for a lot of people. Yeah. But like 45 grand. Yeah. It's like a car. That's a car. It's a lot of money. That's a down payment on a house for a lot of people. Yeah. A lot of money. But like he doesn't have kids. He doesn't have expenses. It's like.
That's literally... That's his thing. That's his thing. His passion. Yeah, it's a passion project. But yeah, like it's not... And just to get your pilot's license and then pay to rent a plane, he bought one. Could he fly that anywhere? Yeah. Like I could be like, I'm going to Minnesota on my plane. Really? Yeah. What about like... What about like... It may take you longer. Cancun. Yeah. Really? Yeah. He is limited by distance. So like he couldn't fly his plane across the ocean to Hawaii. Because of his oil? Because of gas. Okay, gas. But he got...
Jet fuel. But he got extra takes. Because of his coal? Yeah.
Like me not knowing how a plane works. Yeah. It's okay. Happens to the best of us. But yeah, I just, I mean, he got tip tanks too, so he can now fly a little further, but there's limitations. Yeah. I will just say, speaking of planes and traveling and like we got, I get we got far from this story, but I saw a post about this mom who passed out 200 goodie bags filled with earplugs and candy on a flight.
from like South Korea or something. And it was like a little note like, hi, I'm baby Henry. I'm sorry if I cry. This is my first flight and I'm nervous. And like this mom passed out 200 packs of earplugs and treats. Oh my God. So, so generous, but also so, so sad that she felt she had to do that. Like I think people have this expectation of like planes being like
oh, babies can't cry on planes. It's like planes are for a lot of people, public transportation. Yeah. And I think people forget like babies are humans, right?
So give babies a little slack on the planes, guys. I'm the first one to be like, babies on planes. Like, I get it. But I have like really had to like remember even myself. Like I was a hater on babies on planes. Yeah. But I've really tried to remember. There you go. They're just little babies. Patience. A little more patience. I've been okay with that. Yeah. I've never been the person who gets mad about babies. Yeah. Yeah.
You know, there's some people out there. But yeah. What is your final verdict on pregnancy train guy? Asshole, not the asshole. I don't know. Asshole in that situation, I guess. But like, I don't know. I'm not I'm not super irked by it. I'm gonna be honest. Yeah. I'm not super like she I'm not angry about it. Yeah. I feel like this is one where I'm kind of like you're the asshole for not paying more attention to her. But also like.
I don't think she should start pouting and then cancel the whole trip. That's how I feel. Get the whole family involved. This might be an everyone sucks. That's how I feel about it, where I'm like, yeah, you're kind of an idiot, but like...
It's not that big of a deal. Yeah. It's easily remedied by just... I wouldn't, I personally wouldn't. And again, she's pregnant. Maybe she's got hormones. Maybe like, I think you read one of the symptoms was like irritability or like mood. Moodiness. So maybe this is part of that. I don't know. Maybe that's just her personality, but I personally am not going to go call my family and his family and like make this a huge thing and cancel. Like personally speaking, that's not what I'm going to do. I'm not that angry about it. But again, I don't know. Maybe she's
Really tired and fed up. And just this was her final straw. Yeah. Okay, moving along. Need new glasses or want a fresh new style? Warby Parker has you covered. Glasses start at just $95, including anti-reflective, scratch-resistant prescription lenses that block 100% of UV rays.
One last one with Alejandra. Woo!
Okay, so this is vintage. Vintage, vintage. It's four years old, coming from r slash relationships. It is titled, My 28 female boyfriend, 29 male of two years, will not stop speaking in a fake Italian-American accent and keeps making up foreign words. Ha ha.
Throw it's just ridiculous. Throw away because he uses Reddit and also because this is kind of embarrassing. Okay. To preface this, I love my boyfriend and he is a super sweet, nice, smart guy that I feel lucky to have. But his behavior lately is freaking me out and makes me worried for the future. My boyfriend loves movies, especially mob movies. He has all of the Sopranos DVDs at his place, and I'm pretty sure he still watches them that way.
That's fine. Obviously, you can watch and enjoy whatever you want. But last week, he saw the Irishman with some friends. And since then, he will not stop talking in like a fake stereotypical mobster accent. Sorry. We were in an Uber the night after going out to dinner. And admittedly, the driver was going a little fast. But my boyfriend kept muttering things like, who is this fucking guy, huh? Dale Earnhardt Jr. over here.
and shooting, ho, as we took corners. He's committed to the plot. Oh, he's gone. He would not shut up and even gave the driver a one-star review saying it was about respect. No! You're lying.
Everyone has their quirks. I get it. And they can be what makes someone special. At first, it was even kind of cute slash funny. But I just can't really understand this shift all of a sudden. It's been a week and he continues to make asides in this voice. And when he gets drunk, he speaks in made up Italian. No, no. Lauren? It's the made up tongue.
Like we were having dessert at my sister's and he came up to me and said, quote, Hey, Ma, I got some home and hit the drapini. No, I'm the DD. I don't drink. So I asked him why he wants to leave and what a drapini is. His response was, quote, You know, like a shower. He said drapini for shower. Yeah. Drapini is not a word in any language. Yeah.
He also never called me ma before. Oh my God. He was referring to his girlfriend? Yeah. No, I thought he... And now he does it almost all the time. I feel crazy.
Like, is this going to be a permanent feature of his personality now? Oh, my God. I know this sounds incredibly stupid compared to some of the other stories on here, but I'm really nervous about what this means about his personality slash mental health. Oh, my God. He really is a sweet, loving guy with a wonderful family, and we have a lot in common. But just like, I don't even know how to begin to approach this.
I want to tell him off and be like, why do you keep doing this voice? Can you please stop? We don't live together. So thankfully it's not a constant thing. But like, what if we did and it was? Is this the kind of thing you just deal with when it's someone you love? Question mark? No. I keep thinking, why doesn't she just talk to him about it? Yeah. Like, it's not, it's not crazy to just be like, hey, you know, like,
why not join him if you can't beat him join him hey ma let's go i need a drapeenie yeah i can't i just i don't know dude i don't know this one's unique um
I just don't see the issue with just like bringing it up. It's not that serious. Not that deep. That's a lot of these. I'm going to be honest. I got really, really into Peaky Blinders. Oh, I love Peaky Blinders. I literally went around probably for a month. Peaky Blinders. Whatever the heck the accident is. Peaky fucking blinders. That was a good one. I would just go around literally no context. Yeah. Had nothing to do with anything that was going on. Tom Shelby.
Do you know we're fucking the Shelby's Peaky fucking blinders. Do you know who we are? Right. Unprovoked. Unprovoked. Well, we've all done that. Like, haven't you seen the TikTok where it's like, you can't be friendly. Girls take friendly as flirty. You haven't seen this one? No. Please. I know everyone out there knows what I'm talking about. I haven't seen that one. You can't be friendly. Wait. Like, you can't be friendly. Girls take friendly as flirty. Yeah.
shut it down. It's like this like really interesting accent. Oh my God. Yeah. Look it up. Anyway. TikTok I haven't seen. It's a TikTok viral sound. Everyone just keeps like redoing it. It's from Love Island UK. Oh the best. And she's like telling him off being like girls take flirty as friendly. Shut it down. And
Anyway, it's like, okay, out of nowhere, people just will start like doing that accent and it's like funny, but like not in your everyday persona. Yeah. Like busting out with peaky fucking blinders is like not your personality now. That is true. Like that's just – and it wore off. But like if this is truly bothersome to her, I feel like she should just be like, yo, you're hilarious, but there's a time and a place. And I did not marry a fake Italian or like date a fake Italian. Oh.
Pull it together. If you want to go to Italy, just say it, okay? True. And some people have their bit. Honestly, this might be his bit from now on. Everyone should have a good bit. I love a good bit. What's yours? Um...
So Tommy and I, one of my good guy friends, he's big body. Yeah. You know, the big body bit. The big body. The big body bit. I love... I think everyone needs to start doing this bit. He's a big body and I'm Champagne Olay and I'm also somewhat of a big body apparently. And so that's my... Like that's our bit. Like that's one of them. I probably have a couple others. I feel like... And big body is like... It can be physical, but it's also energy. No, it's energy. Oh, yeah. For the record. Yeah, it's not... When I say I'm a big body...
it's my energy. Explain the, like, what is a big body? Well, it did start with actually physically him being a bigger body. He's 6'3". He's like a big guy, like buff. Big body. Like, you know, he's a big guy. But like, it became like big body energy. Like BBE is like, it's like big dick energy. Like anything that's like, like has a big body move. Like I'm about to like,
eat five donuts it's like okay big body and it's like a good thing or like you big dick someone it's like okay big body um like and he has a persona i love it yeah where if he's like being like what he would call like soft then he's hard body hard body is like a different persona oh uh-huh
Yeah. So that's one of our bits. But then I also have like a bunch of bits with my family. Like I love a good bit. So I love this commitment to character. I think it could be fun. But I think it's a little scary that it's like taken over. Like does he have a job? Does he do that at work? Oh, yeah.
I think I need to watch The Irishman. I haven't seen it. It's apparently like a three-hour movie. Oh, wow. Okay. It's really long. Yeah, no. Nothing wrong with that, but it's just like clear your night. He's kind of giving Ken some energy. Yes, Kennergy. Have you seen Barbie? Of course. Life-changing. Duh.
Absolutely life-changing. I saw this guy who was talking about his dad's review of Barbie. And he's like, there's going to be before Barbie, BB. BB. And after Barbie, AB. AB. And I agree. Love it. Love it. But it's giving like the, like, you know, all the Kens were obsessed with the Godfather. Yes. Were they? In that movie? Yeah. Were they? Yeah, they were obsessed with the Godfather and horses. Casa Dojo Mojo House. Casa Dojo Mojo House. But is that a Godfather reference?
No, no. But like they were all watching The Godfather. Were they? Yeah. Oh, you're right. They were watching it and they were like, explain this movie to me. Okay, yeah. I knew the horses. Issa walks in. She's like, oh, are you watching The Godfather? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Versus The Godfather. Yeah, yeah. You're right. And like, explain it to me. Yeah. The man's playing it to me or whatever. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So it's just so funny. It's just such Ken thing. Dude, I've had, I have like these male clients. I've had a couple of now where they all reference The Godfather and I'm like, what, what
What is with guys? Okay, Ken. Like, what is with guys and The Godfather? Like, they love it. Like, they love that movie. And they love the... There's like lines in there that they'll like drop. And I'm like, I've never seen the movie. Fun fact. I mean, it's good. I'm sure it's good. I should go watch it. But...
I don't know. Maybe for the time, because I know there's a Miles Teller show now about the making of The Godfather that's apparently incredible too. Nice. Yeah. I mean, it wasn't life-changing for me personally. Okay. For those that it was, I'd love to hear why. You know, to each his own. Do you know that? Well, you don't know because you haven't seen it, but they actually, there's one scene where the guy wakes up with a horse head in his bed and
And The Godfather? Yeah. Ew, a real horse head? I think it was a real horse head. No, stop. I don't even want to see this movie now. I haven't seen a lot of big movies. The Horse Head, Godfather. Yes, it was a real horse. The studio had encouraged Francis Ford Coppola to use a fake horse head, but he didn't like the mock-up. You're lying. Where did they get a horse head? I don't want to know. His scouts found a horse ready for slaughter at a dog food plant in New Jersey. No! Oh my
oh my god I don't want to watch this movie that's I can't condone that when that one is slaughtered send us the head fuck the godfather oh my god I hate this movie yeah it was uh can you imagine being that do you want to see the picture no can you imagine being the actor that has to literally do that scene no no no I'm literally getting goosebumps I'm disgusted I feel like that would go against the union nowadays I don't know it's just gross I that could never that would never fly these days
I don't think so. No. I think a lot has changed, especially recently in terms of like actor rights. And like a lot of them have like intimacy directors and coordinators now. I hadn't heard of that. It was sex life. Yeah. And so they wear like coverings, like basically like a nut cup and like things like that that weren't offered. And I know one show that really...
advocated to have one is outlander and the character jamie the actor that plays him i'm forgetting his name i think it's i don't know i don't know so he didn't have one early on in the show and he had very graphic scenes where he was what's this is this a show yeah it's called the outlander it's amazing such a good show you would get i think you'd get into it yeah uh showtime or stars
One of them. I got a login. You can let you use it. But he felt very, very, very violated. And they he like really went to bat and said, no, we need an intimacy coordinator. Oh, really? Yeah. And so I think that also changed with Game of Thrones, where Emilia Clarke did not have one early on. And then in the show, but I've heard. Yeah. And so they changed it. And so that's those are recent.
So, like, I mean... Yeah, I feel like I have heard about those, like, with sex life. Oh, and euphoria. Yeah. There was, like, a sex coordinator or something. As they should. Bare minimum. As they should. Bare minimum. For sure. Yeah. But this guy...
I think you just have a conversation. I think I forgot to read the top comment. Oh, shoot. Yeah. Which is, lol, what the fuck? He sounds like Michael Scott. Literally. Yes, he does. He does. He does. Is he Italian at all? I know plenty of Italian Americans who kind of amp it up like this. Yeah. You should let him know that it annoys you. I don't think he's Italian because, well, again, I'm really jumping to a...
But I feel like if he were Italian, he wouldn't be making up fake Italian words. Yeah. Like I would never in my makeup fake Spanish words. No. Like even my dad is – he's not fluid in – oh, my God. I'm forgetting it right now. But there's certain like Jewish words where he's like, oh, that's a mitzvah or like, oh –
you putz or what I don't know there's a bunch of like words and he's not fluent in that but like he knows the actual words where he'll mix in yeah of course versus making up a drappini no he literally made up a word that's like I feel like you wouldn't do that if you were truly Italian also if someone said drappini I'd be like oh french press coffee I think that's a drink
I don't know what kind of drink, but I think it's giving drink. Very unclear, yeah. Next comment down is, I'll have a gabagool salad on the side. If the salad isn't on the side, I send it back. Is that like a father, godfather? It must be a Michael Scott quote, I was thinking. I don't know. I freaking love Michael Scott. I will have the gabagool. What? The gabagool. I don't really know what that is. You know, gabagool.
I don't have to have that. - What he's trying to say is, "Gaba ghoul." - Guys, guys. - I don't really think that we have that. - That's okay. - Bring in the gaba ghoul. - I will have the spaghetti with a side salad. - Okay. - If the salad is on top, I send it back.
Oh my God. Gabagool. Oh my, what is that? It's a salad on the side. That's what that means? Yeah, gabagool. In what language? Michael Scott. Oh my God, he just made up a language. Yeah. I'm dead. You know, I've never seen The Office. Oh my God, please do. I'm going to start. It's so, oh my gosh, it's so funny. I was ready to start it and then it got pulled from Netflix. Oh, that's really frustrating. Terrible timing. That is really frustrating. I think it's on Hulu now. I'll get to it. It's good. It's a show that I have watched. Yeah.
Yeah, it's good. I like this one. This is a fun one. That was a funny one. I was really I find a lot of enjoyment in that really freaking weird. My boyfriend were doing that. We'd have to have a conversation, but I can't help but laugh like I applaud his commitment to the character. But like, let's snap out of it. Thank you. Yeah.
It's funny. And scene. Okay. I'm trying to see if there's any more comments from OP. Just like out of curiosity. It's just funny that she's just like, she's just dealing with it. Like she's suffering in silence. Like she's not even like,
like saying anything to him like can you not yeah um she does go the comment she responded to was deleted but they basically say that's what I hope but when what happens when another movie slash show triggers it I don't think I've seen this side of him before and it kind of weirds me out since normally he's pretty reserved and soft-spoken um
Yeah, honestly, that's another question. Is he going to like morph into his next favorite character? Like maybe it's Peaky Blinders. So now he's Tom Shelby. Yeah. And then he watches Barbie and now he's Ken. He's not hurting anyone. Honestly, out of all these today. Truly. This is my favorite. Totally. 100%. This is my favorite. No one was hurt in this process. No. Someone goes, this sounds hilarious. Yeah. Opie goes, trust me, it gets old. I could see that. I could see that.
Someone goes, sounds like he's having some sort of midlife crisis. Just gradually reminding him that it is not funny should help. Hopefully that persona will die out soon. I don't know if it's a crisis, but it definitely feels abrupt and almost on purpose. Yeah, it's called having fun. Yeah, I think it's like laugh it off. He's having a good time. It's only been two weeks. If it's annoying, you walk away.
We'll just have a conversation. Again, yeah. If you have a conversation and then he doesn't stop. Just tell him, yeah. But it doesn't sound like there's been any, hey, this is a little much. Yeah, she's been like, do I approach him? Yes, you approach him. If you're annoyed by something minor your partner's doing, it's better to have the conversation and not bottle it up versus like, you know, like I saw something interesting the other day where a lot of times guys will not...
talk about their emotions. And it's not that they don't feel their emotions. They just don't have the words to describe them because it's not something they've practiced. Like if you think about women, typically we'll vent to our girlfriends. Oh my God, I just feel so annoyed. He is driving me crazy, blah, blah, blah. Guys don't do that. Like when I ask Justin, I'm like, who do you talk to about when you're dealing with
like us fighting or stress from your family. Like, who do you go to besides me? Yeah.
I don't really have anyone. So if he wasn't dating you, who would he go to? Exactly. He would bottle it all up. And that's not healthy. And so I'm like couples therapy is like a non-negotiable. Like we're going to start it just for like regular maintenance soon. Because like we don't have any major issues. But when things do come up from external forces, it's nice to like have healthy ways to deal with it. Totally. But I think that's just such an interesting thing where like
will then use something you say where if women do bring up I'm speaking traditionally relationships because I know it's so different for the queer community. Yeah. But like say I said to Justin like hey you know what like you said you would be there at 8 today and you didn't show up until 10 and I just would have appreciated a message just letting me know and then he takes me bringing up something as a well you know that one time when you were late 5
five months ago, it really hurt my feelings. Yeah. And it's like, okay, well, you should have addressed that five months ago. Yeah. Don't wait and bottle up your emotions right
to when you have an excuse. And I, you know what I mean? Well, that's tip for tap mentality. Yeah. But I will agree with you. Whereas I've noticed a lot in even my relationships that guys are do that a little bit more than girls. Cause as you mentioned, girls almost have like regular purging sessions. Yeah. Men don't. So they wait for an opportunity, almost like an invitation. Yes. That's what it is. It's the invite. It's the
oh oh it's open season okay and they pull up their like list and they're like well let's talk about what you know so it's like you didn't bro just like bring it up when it happens yeah I um my little brother actually had an ex-girlfriend that kept a list
I did at one point. And it's like, I know it's kind of just break up. Like if you have a list of things that piss you off, break up. That's when I knew we were going to break up when I had the list. Yeah. And there's a lot I've seen. Not a lot. I guess I've seen a couple of people do it, but I've seen multiple girls talk about how it's like healthy to keep a list versus like addressing everything. And I'm like,
know about that. Yeah, I don't know about that. It feels like you're keeping score. For me, personally, the list was just to clarify I wasn't sitting there like plotting against him. I think I was ready to start breaking up and I needed reminders because I'd get so lost in the good times that I needed to revisit that and be like, no, no, no, no. He did do all of these things because I was like gaslighting myself a little bit. Okay. I can see it being helpful there. Yeah. It was almost like a journal to be like, no, no, no. Remember,
But I can see how if you're actively in a relationship with someone with no intention of breaking up, then you're kind of keeping score. Yeah. That is like truly a little unhealthy in my opinion. Yeah, definitely. And I think that's one thing like after you have that,
initial conversation in a relationship, if someone does bring up like other issues, like the invitation, like you said, I think that's a great time to be like, hey, going forward, let's address things as they pop up. Yes. It's not going to hurt my feelings. And hey, if it does, I'm going to try to not take it personally. I'm really going to try to hear you in the moment and change behavior or see how we can address it together. Yeah. Because it's easy to get offended if a partner brings up something or, you know, you feel attacked. Yeah.
We all, we all get there. It happens, but just like step back and like, just take it as it is with a grain of salt and move forward. And, or just even be honest and say like, I can't promise that my feelings aren't going to be hurt because they might. Right. But I'll, I can promise you that I'll work to get past it and I'll promise that I'll try to like take it, you know, productively, but I might have my feelings hurt, but that's just part of the process. Yeah.
The way the cookie crumbles. The way the cookie crumbles. Okay. Well, that's Alejandro's segment on patience. Anything you want to tell the people before we go? No.
No. No. Nothing comes to mind. No. Okay. No. Well. Just have a good summer, Hags. Hags. Wrapping up. Hockus. What's Hockus? Have a kick-ass summer. Have a kick-ass summer. Summer's coming to a close. It is. Make the best of it. Yeah. Full send. Speaking of summer coming to a close, we are doing a live show at the University of Minnesota on September 26th.
If you are a University of Minnesota student or you have a connection to a student or faculty member, you can go for free.
So it's a totally free show. So if you have a friend that goes to the University of Minnesota, you can show up as long as you're with them. Wait, really? Yeah. I'm like over here like. Yeah. So I'll post more info when I get it. I just learned that detail today. Nice. So mark it on your calendars. Tuesday, September 26th, we will be at the University of Minnesota. Go go first. Yeah. I might do a little meet and greet.
in the like quad before. So I'll keep everyone posted on that. Just follow the Too Hot Takes Instagram or my personal and you'll see lots of info on that. But it'll be a good time. Okay. Until next time, guys. Bye. Bye.