THE GIGACHAD IS BACK (ft. @PremierTwo ) | Trash Taste #237
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- Welcome back to another episode of Trash Taste. I'm joined by the boys once again, and this time by a very special guest who's joining us, Pete from . - Thank you. First of all, don't I get some sort of a special intro because I mean, it's a two time award winner. - Hold on, hold on, hold on. No, I got it, I got it, I got it. - I mean, I won. - All right, okay. - Let's try it. - All right, all right, fine, fine. - Special guest Saturday. - Welcome to this episode of Trash Taste. I'm joined by the boys,

Join today the two-time award-winning Giga Chad. You know him. You love him. You've paid for the full seat, but don't worry. You're going to be very comfortable the entire time because it's going to be a two-hour banger with your and my Pete. Premier Tune!

- I feel so much better with that intro. - Damn. - But you know, truthfully, thank you. That was very good. - That was some WWE shit. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But I- - Weighing in at 300 pounds. - Maybe 330. - But I was thinking about, you know, how I was a two-time Giga Chad Award winner. But the reality is, I haven't seen you guys in about a year on the show, right? - Right. - Yeah. - What you guys have done in the last year is like,

Insane character development. You've been broadcasting anime to a whole new generation of weebs on Twitch. - That's character development?

- That's character regression. - No, that was great. - All I'm doing is watching anime feet. That is no achievement to be talking about. - He's been doing that for the past 16 years, dude. - But I got to see it on Twitch, which felt like something that was always so against the rules. You can't broadcast any copyright material. So you brought Overlord to me and I was like, that's sick. - Oh shit, you watched Overlord? - I did, I was like this is sick. - All right.

creating a clothing and burping in my face. You created a clothing empire that you had a pop up in Shibuya. - Empire is a strong word. - Which is insane though. But you got to go into one of the biggest buildings in Tokyo. You've raised a million dollars in charity. - We raised, we raised, we raised. - But still among other things, all I've done in the last year genuinely is

I got a haircut and I gained 12 kilos. That's like it. So I feel like it was awesome to win the award twice, but I think that you guys actually are...

are the true Giga Chads. And congratulations on that. - No, no, I don't want your- - See audience, this is a classic form of manipulation. - No it's not. - He's already securing the third Giga. - The third award Chad. - No, I- - Give it to someone else. - The question is, did you know what a Giga Chad was before you won the first award? - Absolutely not. I had no idea. So, I mean, I'd seen the meme, but like,

the guy doing the poses. But I thought that was just from trash taste into you guys. Like I thought that was just something you guys said. - We're not original, we steal. - I thought that it was like from an After Dark episode or something. And then when we did the first cyclothon, I added it as an alert, but the TTS couldn't say it right. They said Gygacid. - I love Gygacid. - I thought it was Gygacid for like, oh, is that the way you actually say it?

And then, you know, it's a fun term, I guess. Gig and Chad. - It just rolls off the tongue. - How long have you been doing, so you transitioned doing Twitch? - Four years. - Four years. - It's been four years now? - Yeah. - Congratulations. - You just had it recently, right? - Yeah, the four year anniversary of my wife thinking daily- - I think we should cheers to that, Pete. I think we should cheers to that. - Oh, speaking of another amazing thing, you guys have your own beer.

- Oh yeah. - Yes. - Cheers to four years. - Cheers to four years. - Wow, it didn't explode, weirdly enough. - Yeah, I mean, it's just knocked around. - All right, so- - They don't pressurize cameras to like- - Now that you've been doing Twitch for four years, how is your meme knowledge? - How did I spill that on me? - How is your knowledge of like modern slang and modern lingo on my show? - I mean, it's tough, but- - Oh! - Oh shit! - He just did it! - No! - He did it! - No!

- No, no, he learned this from like literal like four year olds. - Oh yeah, that's true. Well, Ludwig classifies, I guess. - Yeah, we were on the RV trip. We had this, we were in like a llama, an alpaca zoo. - Oh yeah. - And there was a bunch of school kids and then they just obviously came up to us and they were asking us questions and Ludwig mugged one of them and then the kid did it back flawlessly and better. - Yeah, way better. - He like destroyed him and now Pete won't stop doing it.

So...

- It's so weird to see him do that. - I know, I'm 41 and I'm bugging Connor. I would say that- - You bug me all the time, I'm used to it. - But you know, it's an interesting thing because the culture is so much faster with these meme games. And what is popular even six weeks or a year ago is completely unpopular now. - Yes. - And- - It's more like six hours a year. - It really is. - Six hours sometimes. - It's crazy.

think I'm lucky in a sense on my channel. I think there's not a lot of that. I mean, there is like we joke about it, but you go to a normal Twitch channel and it has a lot of emotes or reactions of alms or cot or cinema or all these like people just spam the same thing. I think my viewers are maybe sleeping, but no. So it's I think we still have like conversations and stuff. So the opportunity to learn

- I think your chat still is like full of actual like human interaction. - Yeah, I think so. But it has been fun. Every time I get to hang out with the younger kids as you guys are, I get to learn all new things. - The younger kids. - The younger kids. - We're gonna be useless in that regard soon. - We're getting up there. - We already are. - Two thirds of us are already useless. - Yeah, we already are. - You're our only hope.

- Well, you're the young one left. - I got two years, bro. I got two years. - That's what you think and it comes up on your fast. - Yeah. - Do you know what I realized the other day? I was like, I've been doing YouTube for literally half my lifetime. - Really? - I started YouTube, my first upload was 17 years ago.

- 17 years, so it has reached a point where I'm 34 now. - That's crazy. - So half my lifetime has been spent doing YouTube videos. - Not only that, your entire adulthood. - Yes. - Yeah. - I think all of us so far, for me, it's like our entire time has been on YouTube. - These are your heroes. - Yeah. - Whoa.

- We have never claimed to be heroes, right? And also, not all heroes. - I flipped a couple of burgers. - You did, you did. - That was not a real job though. That was just abuse to simulate. - I didn't even get into that job. - I worked for the BBC. - I would say though, so the BBC arc, which is still kind of jokingly and lovingly referred to, was that also 17 years ago?

- No, so I did YouTube and I quit to do the BBC. And then this motherfucker rose up and I'm like, this motherfucker thinks he can take my crown? Ain't no way. I'm coming back baby. - And then he came back like Vlad B. What Joey proved was that you could do YouTube as a job. It just wasn't a thing 17 years ago.

So that's what he proved to me. - Gaunt used to be that guy when I was like, you know, when I was in school, he was like, you get one Gaunt video every two years and everyone would be like, oh my God. - It was like the Michael Reeves of today. - Yeah, yeah. - Now we're coming back baby. - And now he's- - Now you're in a content machine. - And now we, that's the same for C-Dog videos, right? - Yeah, actually, yeah. - I think out of us three, he uploads the most frequently.

- You're the most consistent. - On main channel, yeah. - On main channels, yeah. - Well, I mean, it is crazy when you put it that way. You're 34 and I mean, I hadn't started streaming at your age yet still.

That was another three or four years away from me to even begin that second or third or fifth life that I've led in the job world. But congratulations on 17 years. That's actually, that's insane. - Thank you very much. One more year and your channel can drink. - Yeah, next year the anime zone is literally legal adults. - Oh, in the UK. - Yeah. - Non-Japan actually. - Non-Japan. - The anime zone is 18 years old.

- That's depressing to think about. - Yeah, scary. - That is scary to think about. - But you have to admit, would you agree possibly, I'm setting you up now to agree with me, but have your 30s so far been better or more enjoyable than your 20s?

- That's a word question. - He threw you the ball there. - You can say no. - I wanna say yes, but I also wanna say I've been more comfortable, but I do miss the energy I had in my twenties. I feel like I got lucky in my twenties. So normally what your twenties are for is like discovering yourself and then you do all the exciting shit when you're 30.

And I feel like I've done so much exciting shit in like my late twenties. Now that I've reached my thirties, I'm like, I kind of like feel like I've regressed a little bit to be like, I'm fine just chilling now. - But with chilling, that also invites a certain sort of like piece of this is like the best year of your life because you just enjoy your time.

- Yeah, because you can chill. - Yes. - But I think the best years is subjective. I would say I've enjoyed my thirties as much as I've enjoyed my twenties. Just in a different way. Just in a different way. I am dealing with different problems and I'm enjoying different things. But I'd say from my experience,

I've enjoyed both. I think I was very blessed in my twenties and I've been very blessed in my thirties as well. - I mean, yeah, but, and that's the other thing as well is that like, you know, you're comparing what four years to 10 years. So it's like,

- Yes. - Also you're living it, so I feel like it's harder to look, when you look back on a period, it's a lot easier to kind of be like block out all the shitty things. You're like, oh, that was fun. - Yeah, now if we were to compare my 30s to my first four years of my 30s to my first four years of my 20s,

Oh, apps are fucking looping. - So we're tracking that this could be a better decade. - Trending upwards. - So far it's a good start. 24 was about the age I quit the BBC. So now is like when my 20 started getting good. - Was there a period in your life where you were like, "Damn, this is kind of crazy." Like this is the best. - Tuesday, I think. I mean, like, I think from the best,

I genuinely feel like each year has been better than the last. - Oh, hell yeah. - Like I genuinely feel that way. Even when I was like, when I was 24, I was still in college, still in the math lab. And they're like, he's never gonna graduate. He's so stupid. - I mean, it must be like, if you could talk to like,

16 year old Pete and be like, one day you're gonna get to play video games. - He would be like, shut up, I'm playing games. - You were doing this and getting paid. - I think young Pete would be like, yeah, I know. - He just had a cosmic knowledge, it's gonna work out. - Well, I think that actually has,

persisted throughout my entire life. But I remember when I was maybe six or seven, I used to wake up in the morning and play Nintendo before school. And my mom would be getting ready for, you know. - You could wake up early? I couldn't do that. - Well, I mean, I don't think I slept. I just, I know I was awake. But she would, she'd have like her robe singed and you smoking a cigarette and she'd go, "Oh gosh, you know, you've played those games all the time. It's never gonna lead to anything." And I was like, "That's not true, mom. Someday I'm gonna be paid to play games."

And now I am. - You had the last laugh. - She often calls me and says like, remember when I used to tease you about that? - My mom's do the same thing. - Yep. - Same here. - My mom still teases me about it. - Yeah. Well, my mom still calls it twatch and she doesn't know that it's Twitch. And I'm like, mom, please. - What is twatch? - I don't think she knows. - Does your mom watch your streams? - She tries and her, I'm not gonna tell you the number, well, I will, it doesn't matter. But her name is, she's 74.

And every time I call her, she'll be like 74 ready for more. And I'm like, okay, mom, that's great. You're very youthful, very excited. Her name on Twitch is like gypsy girl 27 or something. And so people, when the channel was really small, people would like, I think show a special interest in it. Cause it was a girl in the chat. They'd be like, Hey, what's up gypsy girl? I'm like, please stop. Right.

I was like, that's my mom. Why couldn't she be called like Gypsy Woman? Because I think it's a famous song that she liked from when she was young. And I was like, could you just change it to anything without the word girl in it? Because you're getting hit on and you're in your 70s. But she's like, I like the attention. Oh my gosh. She's great though. She's kind of badass though. She's the best. When we called her on my birthday in the van, I asked her,

- Like a live on stream. - Live on stream. I said, "How many edibles have you had?" And she went, "Four." And I was like, "All right." - I wanna hang out with your mom. - She's the best. So she was born in 1950. So I'd say that she's had, she got to experience the whole gamut. Yeah, but take that mom. - The onslaught, the onslaught. Oh my gosh, damn. - Each year has been better. And this year already,

- Already great. - So, wait, how old are you again? - 41. - 41, all right. See, I look at you and I'm like, - Just around the corner for you. - I have something to look forward to. So we had a conversation about like the era that we grew up in, right?

And I think now '90s culture was coming back in. We've talked about this on "Trash Taste." But I also think none of us have a proper experience of the '90s 'cause we kind of, that was like when we were like, you know, our prefrontal cortex. - Fetuses. - We were like fetuses back then. But you actually got to grow up in the '90s, right?

What was it like? What do you miss the most about that era? - Tell us the stories, granddad. - Granddad, please. - Did the McDonald's really look that cool when you went in them? - What would you say defines '90s culture for you? - I think that we were in an era of unbridled

optimism as children. - God, oh my God, I wish. - I miss that shit. - It's true. And I think that it was the perfect blend of there was a rise in middle-class income where we could afford things that maybe my parents' generation couldn't waste money on. And we had toys, we had arcades.

We had fast food was still novel and that you didn't eat it every day. It was like, we're going to pizza hut, which was like a reward thing. It was, yeah. We literally read books to get a free personal pan pizza that you'd take your homework and they would be like, good job, son. It was a great, great time. And the thing that I will always be appreciative of is as a gamer is I have a unique perspective. And I think I've even mentioned this on this channel. I've grown up from, uh,

and been present and active for every single...

on video games. You mean there's an entire history of video games? Yeah. As it was new. Yeah. And as I could still appreciate it. And it was like, because when we, just like an idea of the 90s of something that was, things that are long gone now, telephones, you know, taking messages, long distance calls. You couldn't call your cousin across town. Just a landline, right? Yeah. Taking messages for like your family. The UK was pretty fucking old. They might still have it. When I was a kid, I had a black and white TV. Oh, yeah.

- And still using a rotary phone. And then they had dial-up the first, I remember having dial-up for like one year. - Yeah, dial-up was a big game. Well, the internet was huge, but the whole, the notion of having four channels and Fox being the newest channel, it was like the edgy one with like the Simpsons and stuff. There was only four channels that you could even possibly watch. But what I always miss was they had these newspapers we would get, 'cause we saw daily delivered newspapers.

And around this time of year, during Black Friday or Thanksgiving or Christmas is ramping up, they would have these full-color ads for like Best Buy or Fry's or whatever your electronic store is. And it would have a little...

image of every single game that was coming out with and my mom would let me circle three games for christmas and then she would say i you know i don't know if i can get you all three but choose your best three that shit i would i would take that to school i would get like community notes on it like what do you guys think i would i would it would be the most agonizing decision of my life yeah yeah and uh

It was just really fun. And imagine this as well. Like, I could talk about this for seven hours, but the other thing- - Oh, please do. - Well, it's so fascinating to me because we wait for games so long now. And when I was young, the difference between Final Fantasy VI

which is three in America. Chrono Trigger and Final Fantasy VII is like three years total, which is insane. You went from Chrono Trigger, which is like peak SNES graphics to Final Fantasy VII within a year and a half. - Yeah, that's psychotic. - That's insane. And Super Mario 64 was at that same time. - The problem that I miss having, and this is like, I don't know if you guys ever had this, you know on Christmas when you would get like three or four games and then you're like, man, which one do I play first?

You're in your head, you're having mental anguish of like, man, I haven't put enough time into this one. I don't want my mom to think I don't like this game. I gotta play it. - Yeah, man. - It's such a good problem that we'll never have now. - Well, now we look at our Steam libraries and it says 12,000 games. - We're just like overloaded with

- Different experiences like. - This episode is sponsored by Shopify. Boys, I run a clothing brand. We sell internationally and that's the vision I always had for the clothing brand. But when we started off, I was like, damn man, how do you do e-commerce? How does people ship internationally? Thankfully, Shopify was there to help me out. - Nobody does selling better than Shopify. Home of the number one checkout on the planet. And they're not so secret secret with ShopPay that boost conversions up to

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Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com/trash, all lowercase. Go to shopify.com/trash to upgrade your selling today. That's go to shopify.com/trash. Back to the episode. - Right now I'm like, I want to play the "Elden Ring" DLC, but I also got to play "Metaphor" as well and all the other JRPGs that have come out this year. - You could play 19 games in the time it would take to play "Metaphor."

- Yeah, I know. - And I would still choose Murderfly. But like, it's an amazing experience, you know? - Last year we got a lot of flack 'cause we said that- - Yeah, I was like, I was gonna ask, just building up to, yeah, this, this, this. - Is it a good year for games? - Man, I fucked that up so bad last year. - You didn't fuck it up. - I said- - I got the heat. - We all got heat. And honestly, fuck you, bring it back already. I took my lumps. No, you know, it's tough. I think that when you look at gaming

it's kind of like the movie industry in a sense where now it's so many sequels and there's, I think my main argument that I wanted to try to say last time was I miss when there was new IPs and there was brand new adventures like a metaphor or something like that. - I think this year has actually been the first year in a while where it's like a lot of them are new IPs. I mean, obviously there's a lot of returning IPs but if you look at the game of year nominations,

There's a lot of new IPs there. Yeah, it's great. I was so excited. And the Elden Ring DLC as well, which... Yeah, it's going to be controversial. Oh, man. I called this like three months ago. There's receipts somewhere on my VODs. I guarantee it. I genuinely felt Balotro was the game of the year. And I got a lot of pushback because it was an indie title and stuff like that. And I was so...

excited when it got nominated because I feel like the indie scene right now is the best we have in games. Those are guys and girls who grew up playing games that we like that no one makes anymore because the development times are too long and stuff like that. So yeah, I think this is a great time to be a gamer. Even if the year itself was kind of disappointing or last year was disappointing on like a headliner. Yeah. It's never been better.

to be a video game player. - True, true. - Yeah, I mean, even when I get sent like fucking millions of game codes, I always do that series where I'll play a bunch. - Yeah. - You know, and I'll play it, and a lot of them are fucking awful. But you'll be like, man, this game has no reviews on Steam, and it's really fun.

And you're like, this is sad 'cause it probably won't ever take off, but it's like a phenomenal game. And you're like, what do you have to do now for it to take off? - You know, just shout it out as much as you can, right? - Yeah, but I mean, it's not, it's just simple. - Or you could do that like real hipster thing where you just like keep it for yourself and be like, nah, nah, this is like the one.

- I like that. No one else talks now. - Nah, I did that with my stream for nine months. - You designed a game that you know streamers would enjoy. - Yeah, if enough YouTubers make more videos about it, it reaches critical mass and then it's like, it's a big game now. - Yeah. - I think there was a game that, oh, so recently I was sponsored

which is a rarity on the channel, but I was really excited about it. I got to play Dragon Quest III. I got paid to do it. Yeah, I was so jealous of you. The idea behind that is so crazy because Dragon Warrior, this is probably, everyone's like, this guy is so old. That game came out in like 1988 or something like that. I played it with my dad. He was like, we would play on Nintendo. It was my very first RPG. And he'd be like, son, I got to go to the store and just don't drink my diet Pepsi.

And I'd be like, why? And then it was whiskey, but that's okay. So he was like, just go ahead and farm slimes and make sure you get me enough gold so we can buy a copper goddamn sword. So he was gone for like four hours. I don't know. It was supposed to be right back. But I ended up getting all this gold by farming slimes. And I bought like 12 wooden sticks. And he came back and was like, God damn it. What the fuck's going on? And I was like...

five or something like that. But to then be all these years later and have a chance to be- - That's so cool. - It's crazy. Like this is my very first game. So I love gaming, but the nineties were special. They were truly, truly unique. - Did you go out a lot as a kid? - Are you kidding me? - I was like, you know, I have this helmet. - Hell no.

- I have this image of just at least, you know, listening to, you know, you're not that age yet. Like Sydney's dad's like stories about how, you know, in America you'd go out and ride your bicycle and you know, it's such a weird concept where,

- Parents would just trust kids to go out with no form of contact. - That's what I did. - Huh? - That's what I did. - That's what you did? - Yeah. - That's what I did as well. - Bro, I lived in Wales. There's just fields. I would get home from school and then, you know, I would be like, all right, I'm gonna see the kids in the park. And then I would be gone until like nine.

- I would walk to like my friend's house. - So did you have like, do you guys have like a curfew where you've been like, you need to be back by this time or we will call the police? - Well, no, they would just kind of be like, well, if he's not back by midnight, maybe we'll figure something out. - I think they were usually calling the truant officer 'cause I would refuse to go to school, not because I was home late. So for me,

Yeah, as soon as I got home, it would be grab my GT dyno, my cool bike that I found. It was like free. And then I would pop curbs where you do like stupid tricks and go meet your friends, go play baseball or whatever. And then we'd play Pogs and Slammers and like stupid, ridiculous, boring shit. And then go home and we'd also go to like Caveman Comics and buy a new issue of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or X-Men or whatever. And all these...

all these things were new still and exciting. And so when you were in school, was there a big like trading card phase? If there was, was there, well, it started with baseball cards, which for a lot of that was still relevant. It was everything in the world, black and white then as well.

It was. We got colors. Right, right, right. It looks like 12 Angry Men. It was. It was so crazy when we got purple and like greens and stuff. And I was like, damn, this DLC is fire. But no, it was, we had baseball cards that we would collect initially. And then there was these

really lame things called Cabbage Patch or Wacky Packs. Oh, yeah. Wacky Packs were my favorite because they were grotesque drawings of pop culture parodies. So instead of having like a Batman card, it would be this disgusting drawing of a superhero named Fat Man and you would collect these and trade them. And then if you collected enough of them, you could have like one giant disgusting image. That was... I mean, these... Back then, we just didn't... There was no internet. There was... Mad Magazine was still...

- I mean, the internet was not very useful when you were a kid 'cause you just didn't know how to use it and search for things that you actually need. - Yeah, no, the internet's only really became like a useful tool in the 2000s, I'd say. - But it was peak in the 90s though. - For like general people, right? - Yeah, for like general people. - Yeah, forum culture was kind of cool. It was kind of fun at the time, but it is a terrible way of- - I miss forum culture. - Do you remember whenever anything happened to your PC and it'd be in a forum

And then it was just never helpful, but you'd always click on the forum just in case it helped you fix your PC issue. And it never fucking did. And the moderator was like, "Let me know if there's any more problems."

And there was always like more problems. - Or it was like the forum would start off with the exact problem you had, but there were no replies. - Yeah. - That's the worst. - But you'd go on these trails of like finding any clue that was remotely successful. Finally, on the deepest depths of a forum, some guy be like, "Yeah, I kind of solved it. Here's what, I just had to restart and hold down X." And you're like, "Oh, thank you." And then we never upvoted it. We never said like, "Thanks, that helped me. Just move on." - Yeah, of course. - Yeah.

Not all heroes wear capes. No, they don't. It was cool, I think. But like I said, even though as great as the 90s were, I think that I'm still enjoying life more now than I ever did back then. But it was- Well, kids are probably hearing, oh, we were unbridledly optimistic. And they're like, how do you be a generation that was optimistic? Well, that was until we were in middle school. And I think most kids are optimistic until then anyway.

- I don't know. - Really? - Talking to some kids, everyone like this, because of the internet, because of like the whole, I guess like a lot of Duma culture has perp,

- Penetrated. - Penetrated. - Gotcha. - Towards like the modern generation. And I don't know, it seems like because of how cynical the internet is right now, it seems like we were around at the time when the internet was this like bright new exciting thing. And now I talk to some kids of the younger generation and they are still optimistic,

But it's cool to be negative. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Self-deprecating humor was a rarity when I, it's my calling card, for God's sakes. I made a career off this in every single facet that I could. But when it was original back then, it played off very well. But then shows like The Office or Awkward Humor, now every kind of comedy is centered around

- That's been the British bread and butter for years. - That's true, actually, what am I talking about? You guys had that since- - What the fuck, that's all off. - That's our thing, don't try to take our culture. - Yeah, that is definitely cultural. - They've been doing this since the dark age. - It's like, my Lord, you're cringe. - British is still in the dark age, just so you know, we never left the dark age. - But it's, I do yearn for a more simple time where,

And I think for me, that's why I like streaming so much to bring it full circle is that it's still my approach to it is a game night with friends where presumably we're sharing games and having a laugh. And I've traded the three or four people who were always at my house to an audience who is there digitally. But yeah, it was a crazy time. So much innovation in such a short period of time. Is there any games you've enjoyed a lot this year?

Other than like, well, Balotro, of course, was like, I think just simply amazing. Dragon Quest III, my God, it was incredible. But I've realized that as much as I love gaming and I'm a historian of video games, I love it genuinely. I don't play games anymore the way I used to because of streaming. It doesn't- It's your job now. Yeah. Well, it just doesn't allow me the room to let the games breathe all the time to, you know, viewer retention and caring about an experience. Yeah.

'Cause we'll always talk when we play the same games. I'll be like, yeah, I beat it in 12. He's like, really? I beat it in 24. - Well, for me- - You like, you know, I feel like you make a show where I'm like, yeah, fuck off Mario. Let's go, fuck it. - It's like speed run. - I don't even tend to, in my head, I'm just like, I literally can't just sit there and wait. Like, I don't know. I just, Subway service on the side. - Wait for what? - I don't know. Like I'm- - For the game to start gaming.

Well, I understand what he's saying. I mean, your purpose in your playthrough, I think it started when you had Brain Rotten, played Call of Duty for 72 hours a day. Oh, my God, yeah. But, like, for me, my fondest memories of gaming are in the basement with my buddies, and one of us is on the PC playing whatever, and I'm on the TV playing Resident Evil on GameCube. And I'm not really trying to go at any particular pace, but we're having discussions and talking about girls we liked or jobs we hate. Mm-hmm.

And the gaming is kind of a byproduct of that. And then as we get towards the end of that, I'm like, oh man, I should lock in and like a hundred percent this. And that is not really a conducive way to stream, I think. No, that is. Wait, so wait, we-

- All your friends come to your house to game? - Always. - Oh, you were that kid. - Oh yeah. - 'Cause my parents are too strict. My best friend, his parents. - I mean, my mom, I think had already been like, that's a girl. - They were like, it's free reign. So whenever I'd go to his, it was like, they wouldn't care if we set up all night, like 24 hours playing video games.

if she knew I was doing that. - My mom, I think, you know, yeah, no way. She was, so we had for my entire senior year, Halo Combat Evolved had just released six months prior or about that time. And we had every Friday for the entire year, Halo nights at my place. It started at seven or 8:00 PM. - Men just want one thing that's disgusting. - 24 guys. - And you say your life is better now? - Actually that might've been the exact same thing.

- That sounds like- - Well actually too bad, when I went to America, Ludwig and the Yard Boys, they do like, they call it penis star league. They have a full land set up of Halo 3 and Modern Warfare 2. - Hell yeah. - They just do land nights. - I think it's a good land party, man. - Land parties, but no, no, no.

you're right though. The land party vibe. We, we'd bring three guys would have to bring TVs like, you know, the big 27 inch, uh, we would have four X boxes, three link cables. Um, and then the only rule when you came over to my place, what we didn't drink at this time, um, God, that would have been madness, but we did drink a lot of colas. So you had to bring either two 12 packs or one 24 pack.

And if there's 18 to 20 guys- - What's a 12 pack? - A 12 cans. - 12 cans of cola? - You had to bring two 12 packs. - Two 12 packs? - One 24 pack. And we, like any Midwesterner, we had a spare fridge in our garage. - How many did you- - It was like full strength Coke, right?

- This is like mountaineering game fuel. - I've never heard someone call it full strength coke. - This was RC Cola, this was Jolt Cola, which had three times the caffeine. - Wait, wait, wait. And how many colas would you drink a night? - So we would often at the end of the night, which would go until my mom woke up for work, 'cause she worked on Saturdays, bless her heart, Jesus, I should send her all my money. So she would wake up and say, "Boys, it's time to go home." We would have,

well over two or 300 cans of Cola. - Oh my God. - How are you alive? - Well, if there's, okay, calculate it, right? Because the fridge, if you, everyone had to bring two 12 packs or one 24 pack and there's 18. - This is how he learned math. - I don't know the answer. - He's like, I don't know what the math is, but I know I can drink a 24 pack. - Easily. - This is guy math. - It was so much fun, man, because one map of blood Gulch or it would take,

would take four or five hours 'cause there was no timers on the original. - Yeah, first time I had a Monster when I was 12 and it felt like I had injected like pure heroin into my hands. - You had a Monster at 12? - Yeah, 'cause it was like, it was like a, you know, around that time was when it was the whole like Monster and Red Bull marketing really ramped up and it was kind of like cool to drink a Monster 'cause the cans neon green, you know, and then it tasted kind of good 'cause it was super sugary. - I was a bitch. I saw like the older kids in my school, like drinking Monsters and I was like,

- That looks yummy, but I'm too scared to try it. - It was like a pound of cannon that tasted good. - It's like if my mom finds out I drank that, she'd kill me. - Yeah, my mom was not happy when she found out. - I think I discovered energy drinks when I was in university. - Yeah, same. - I actually don't think I had any in school. - I thought it was more of a cool thing. I got kind of too much into it and then I had to like

- You sound like you did heroin. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I mean, the end games are like horribly addictive. - It's liquid heroin, basically. - Like, you know, luckily I was, you know, I was mainly like in college where I started drinking them a bit too much. You know, I'd have like one a day. - Yeah, well, I mean, we were old. - Yeah, you know, and I have some friends that would chug like four Red Bulls a day and you're like, are you?

And it's like really hard for them to quit. - Yeah, I stopped doing it. - It is like having like fucking a heroin. We had a roommate and he stopped and he was having horrific migraines and shaking. - Yeah, I got, go ahead. - No, I was gonna say, I stopped drinking energy drinks after my friend almost died of a heart attack. - That also happened too.

And I was like, all right, never touching that again. - Well, I gave him up for quite a while, but at a school Nomi Kai, when I was a teacher, we had a Christmas Bonin Kai or whatever, like end of your party. And some people won like a Nintendo Switch. Some people won like Yakiniku, meat that gets delivered. I won 36 cans of Monster.

And I was like, fuck yeah, fire these up again. And I had, Yuki had to go out to like visit her family for like a week on a trip. So I was at home alone and I played this game called Graveyard Keeper. It's a great game but I don't think I slept for six days and I was just kind of like every time I'd just be like, let's just have one

- Getting off of that only ended because I ran out of the 36 cans. - Man, what a fucking movie. It could have been made in those 36 cans, the movie. The ups and downs. - But those Halo nights were peak.

And even I remember there was once where I got food poisoning because my mom made like tortellini from that was expired for like three years. And we only had the one bathroom that we could use upstairs. And I was like, I'd already invited everyone over. There was like 20 guys there. They were already playing. I was like, I gotta go to the bathroom. I feel really sick. I was like puking. And instead of my friends like helping me, they were like, the fuck up in

I gotta pee. And I was like, bleh. And then they ended up playing the games all night. And not one person picked me up and was like, you good man? Do you need some medicine? They were like, hey, we gotta go. Do we lock the door on the way out? I was like, this is ridiculous. - Friends for life. - Those are your bros you meet on Halo though, so. - Yeah. - Sounds like the most Halo experience of all time. - I got in Halo a lot. I played Cod though. - Yeah? - Yeah. - I played,

- Mainly Gears of War, I think. - Yo, that was multiplayer that was fucked. That one had massive host advantage. - Yeah, that was really bad. - It did. - It was hard. They literally gave, I don't know why, what was the reason behind this? They would give the host extra health. - No, no, no, what? - Yes. Look, Gears of War, let's give it a look. Gears of War host advantage. The host just had extra flat health. - Really? I always thought it was the ping advantage. - His shots. - Taking more damage.

- Basically the host is God, his shots are stronger, can seemingly take more damage, can down you quicker with Lancer and has Uber range on his guns. It was literally impossible to play the game competitively because of this. - I always thought it was because of the ping advantage because when I was the host, you know, you always have like a little bit of a reaction that is always gonna be faster than literally anyone else. - Yeah, I mean, there was obviously that, but I'm pretty sure the stats were actually like buffed. - Right.

'Cause that's what I always thought. - I could be wrong there. - Gears of War was obviously really fun as well. Did your house have a massive basement? - It did. - Does every Midwestern house have a massive basement? - 'Cause of like tornadoes and stuff, right? - I mean, that's probably the reason. - That's the actual reason. - I think back in the day, the house we lived at, so every house,

- I've always lived in the basement. - That sounds so good. - But every house we've ever had-- - Literally your mom's basement. - Was my mom's basement. And we had a fire in one of our houses once where, it was the first time I committed fraud, where they told me, "You can write down the price "of what you bought everything for that was damaged."

I was like, well, this is like a cheat code because all my stuff was kind of old but when I bought it they were like, yeah and I was like Sony PlayStation 299, you know, 27 inch TV. And so we got this great check. I guess it's not fraud if that's what they told me to do in Statutes of Libertations. But we moved to- - That's the next point. - Yeah, that's the next point. Host advantage. So we moved to another basement with all new tech. And I think that not only does every house have it,

I went back there when I, like three years ago when I visited back home, the house was like 180,000 to $220,000 for sale. Um,

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- It must've been like 35,000 when my mom moved in there or something just super affordable. - It does suck talking to your parents. They're like, yeah, I bought it when it was a 10th the price. - I bought it for eight grapes and a handshake. - It was insane. I was like, wow. And this is not even that great of a house. And it's not in a great part of town, but I was thinking that's insane. It's so expensive. - 'Cause every time I go to Wisconsin,

every time I visit like a friend or someone I know that everyone just has like the most massive fucking basement of all time that is like completely decked out. It is like my dream. - It is the man cave. - I don't know what, is it a man? Do we have like the manly urge to just build the perfect

- Of course. - Of course. - You know what blows my mind about American basements? This is like those memes the European mind can't comprehend. They're like the full fridge and freezer, like separate. A full fridge for the basement and then like the perfect size freezer for a body.

But like how many freeze goods do you have? Like that's crazy. - In America? - Yes. - I mean there's a fuckload. - But it's like, it's so much. - So many basements I know just have like, they have their own bar as well. - Yeah. - Well you could have had like a big living room, but your dad was like, nah mate, gonna have a bar. - My dad was like, nah, living rooms upstairs. This is my space. - Jerry's living room is like a foot.

- It's tiny. - It's like a seat in a coffee table. - And then you go downstairs and it's like a- - The entire bar area could easily be a living room. - It's this giant bar and then my dad has this giant record set up with the TV so that my mom can play Wii bowling during Christmas. - That's great though. - And the dart boards. - That's our basement. - What's your dream basement? You own a house. What are you putting in your dream basement? - Bar? - Of course, bar, standard. - Standard. - Pool table?

- I want a poker table at mine. I want a poker table there. - Yeah, just like an area that like, obviously I want like the couch and the TV. So like there's like a game set up. - Yeah.

- I want like, you know what I think? I want like every like game console just like laid out there, you know, like the fucking cabinet where you're like, what console do you wanna play today? Just go through the generation of games. - Then you gotta set up some elaborate switcher, otherwise you gotta get in there and then, oh, I didn't plug in the controller. - I'll pay someone to do that. - Oh, okay, okay. All right. - I'm actually anti-bar at the house. - You're anti-bar at the house? - Yeah, I don't ever, I like to drink obviously, right? Like I love the izakaya culture, but I do not enjoy drinking at homes.

homes. Really? The vibe's all off for me. And I miss the kind of background chatter and the clinking of dishes and silverware. And I feel like it's a very conducive way to be lively. But at a house, I never feel comfortable. And I think it's because I didn't drink till I was like 27, 28 years old for the first time. So yeah, it might've been a delay on that one. So I miss house parties and stuff.

- Are you saying that we might've been drinking for longer than you? - Yeah, that worries me a lot. - I've been catching up though with consumption amounts. - In Wisconsin, going downstairs and having your dad drink is just, I think everyone's core memory there actually. - Yeah. - Wow, see that's so fascinating. They pour like bourbon or something cool and they pour beer. - It's just like you're going downstairs, it's just the parents watching the game basically. - Yeah, your parents just spawn down there.

- Australia is like the UK though. I think most parents. - Yeah, well, we also have a balcony as well that you can like go drink at. - Yeah, yeah. - Okay. - Yeah, we're like a backyard. - I don't think his dad was drinking Guna Fortune at home. - No, my dad had money. - Only broke college kids would do that. - We did. - There you go.

- Yeah, I guess I missed out. So, but yeah, the bar, the poker table, the pool table, the TV. - Would you ever have a projector in there? Or just like a really big- - Projectors are so shit, bro. - You don't like projectors? - I'm a firm projector hater. I just think they often look like shit.

They never look as good as the screen. - Yeah, I think like back then it made sense to have a projector, you know, before like the big, big, big TVs you could buy now, but now you can get TVs the same size as a projector. - And they're like four quid for some reason. You can buy a 70 inch TV for like 50 bucks. - It's crazy. - I'm exaggerating, but like they're so cheap. - You're not exaggerating. I worked at Circuit City, which is a,

in America when I was in college and HDTVs had just come out. - Oh, they're expensive. - First of all, I had never seen something so beautiful in my life. And they always had like the same ads running of like the French open. So you see like the clay. - Or like fucking fish. - Well back then it was just like four minutes of the same reused footage. And I would just sit there and I would upsell to everybody. And this was when plasma TV still had like severe burn-in. So they would,

they would tell you, you know, this can only last for like eight months to two years if you're lucky or whatever. Some of those TVs were over $8,000 or $9,000. And they weren't even that big. This monitor is bigger than some of those TVs back then. And we would still have to sell the Sony Trinitron Mega Bobegas that were...

- At least 850 pounds. Like you cannot lift them. And I think that now when you go to McDonald's, like, do you want a free LCD screen with that? And you're like, sure. - Yeah, the Happy Meal is just a 16 inch LED. - You know, 'cause the TVs now they're like loaded with ads and they collect your data and stuff like that. And that's kind of like the trade off. But you know what? I'm like,

- Sure. The TV's fucking cheap as fuck. Like a 55 inch, like 4K TV, like a nice one is like 500, 800 bucks. It's crazy, yeah. - Do you think TVs are being over-engineered now? - No, no, no, they're shit. They're shit. - I bought a new TV. - They're like the worst parts of a PC in a display. - Okay, why? - They're so slow. - I don't know if this is default on every TV, but I've like...

on every modern TV that I've had so far. The default setting is to have this dog shit auto smoothing on everything. And I don't know why that's like the auto setting, right? - Have you seen the subreddits? There's like subreddits dedicated to this, to like calibrating your TV perfectly. And they all get in arguments about how to calibrate your TV perfectly. It's so intense. - Yeah, and then I was, I like, we had a new TV.

And I didn't know this was a setting 'cause this is the first time I've seen this setting, but this CV had a default setting to like auto adjust the volume. So it's like at a constant level, right? - Like a compressor? - Like a compressor. - What the fuck? - So I was watching, I was watching, I was watching this anime, I was watching like solo leveling

this was like a while ago. And I was like, why are the hype scenes so dog shit? They've really fucked up on their like audio mixing in this. Because when it like, when like the music would go loud, suddenly like something would happen. And then like the music would be like,

And I'm like, I'm not hype at all. And then I realized it was the fucking TV like artificially compressing the fucking volume. And I was just like, this is dog shit. Why is this a feature on the TV? - Have you seen the some streaming services now offer dialogue boost to-

to films and TV shows. - No. - 'Cause have you not noticed that like this is a big complaint the past couple of years is that when you watch a movie at home, especially a movie that was in theaters, it's mixed for the theater where the music is quite loud and the dialogue is a lot quieter. So when you go, when you're watching on your TV, like this fucking, it's the volume mixing is way, like it's so fucking loud and you can't hear anyone saying, so you boost it. And then the moment there's an explosion, you're like, fuck.

- I feel like it's always been that way though. - It's been that way since the dawn of television. - Oh yeah, maybe it's just TV speakers. - It's always been the movie industry. You're like, "I can't hear a damn thing." And then they're like, "Toro ho ho!"

- And then bullets and gunshots. - Oh my God. Yeah, when you have to like, you have to constantly, like if it's an action movie, you're like down, the shooting, turn it down. All right, the shooting's over, they're talking again, put the volume back up. You're like, oh my God. - So maybe they have it almost right, but they did it the wrong way. - They did it the wrong way. - But I guess if you're compressing the audio in general, the dialogue is still gonna be even quieter if you're compressing it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. It's, I don't know. - Get down.

It didn't address the problem at all. - Well, yeah, but you guys, when you, how old,

- You guys bought HDTVs your whole life then pretty much? - No, no, no. - Okay, so you did have to. - We had a Trinitron growing up. - I kind of like had the very fast track 360 to 720 with the Scott. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - 'Cause you're the Xbox and you could plug in the cables directly. But then they had that thing that like chunky ass horrible thing that wouldn't go in smoothly into the TV. They're like the really stabby thing type in SCART.

This thing was diabolical. - I remember this. - This fucking thing. - Yeah, these things. - I hate this thing. And it would never go in your TV smoothly. - My dad has like five cardboard boxes. - And then this was like, I think- - PC cables, yeah. - Yeah, I think this was like 480, I think, was it? I think, and then- - 480. - Yeah, and then the first HD was 720. 'Cause I remember a bunch of DVDs that you used to buy back then were only 720p, they'd be like HD. - We used to buy DVDs.

And then it very quickly became 1080p. Quite fast, I think. It felt like it was for me, at least. I don't know if it actually was. Maybe you can tell me because you were probably there. Well, when we got to 1080p, no, I think it was, yeah, I mean, it felt like a natural progression because the jump was so seismic that 1080 to 720, whatever, it was fine. But yeah, those are days gone by. I mean, it feels seismic. I don't know if this is a hot take, but I'm like,

1080 versus 4K, I'm like, I notice it, but definitely not that much. - I mean, 1080 to 720 was a very big leap. Like when you watch a 720 thing, you're like, ah, it's kind of blurry. But 1080p is okay. 4K is much better. - No, no, 4K definitely looks better, but definitely like the jump is just like, okay, if I watch something in 1080 versus 4K, my eyes aren't gonna be like, holy shit, this is like,

back to the stone ages you know what i mean but when you watch something in 360p and you're like okay now there is like a big i'm blind apparently i am actually watching minecraft right now yeah classic youtube yeah yeah exactly i wonder how we i mean it's weird to go back and think about it but at the time a 27 inch tv was enormous you know that was a massive television yeah and uh i i was i

I found this old photo of me playing games with my friend and I posted it on Twitter and we're still sitting cross-legged with like the cords, you know, the corded controllers. And I... Those were simpler times, but hey man, now I can... Like you said, we can download a Steam game in six seconds and...

and never play it again. Pay full price, but be like, "Oh, someday I'll get to that. It's gonna be sick." It's a different era. - Save you for retirement. - Yeah. - But you know, I think it's, like you mentioned earlier, I think gaming is at an amazing point where these indie developers are making some of the coolest and most interesting experiences that we never would have gotten. You know, you would never get some of these games made now. - No, certainly not. - So it's cool.

You'd never get a, let's bring it up, fear and hunger. What's been some of the games of the years for you then? Yeah, you kind of asked me that earlier. And I think it's shameful to say because I haven't, I can't really enjoy games the same anymore. And I'm not complaining about my job. It's just a different feeling. What games have you played this year then?

I think I've calculated, I did 70 games this year. So, like on stream. And I think... Do you play games off stream still? Not really. Just shamefully Diablo 2, which I still have been playing since the year 2000. But...

He still hasn't gotten a single drop. I'm working on it. I'm working on a thing called a Holy Grail, which is finding every item in the game. Oh my God. 20 years later, I'm not even close, but I think I got 76% done. But the thing about this year in gaming, I think my perception of gaming has shifted as a streamer. Now my favorite experiences have been things like when I replayed Phoenix Wright or these games that have a lot of

Kind of community like I'm having fun playing it with the viewers. Yeah as opposed to like that is the best game I've played this like Elden Ring DLC was unquestionably a fantastic experience ballot row is such a great like a gameplay loop, but Dragon Quest 3 probably is I nearly committed channels playing that through but it was so much fun. How long was that? Well, I did

- Three streams of 11 hours each. And so- - That's not too bad. - Well, I'm getting up there. I think it took me about 45 hours of gameplay time. - It wasn't as bad as Baldur's Gate. - That was probably the worst experience. And it was fun, but we didn't even finish. - Yeah, viewers are very bad at watching

long games mainly because no one viewer can watch the whole thing. - Yeah. - So you're gonna miss out and then you already are losing like a portion of people that see the RPG layout and like, ew, I'm good. So you're already like, it's an uphill battle and then you gotta just kind of

- If you stream it too often, then people are like, why is he still playing this game? I don't want to care. It's like watching Ludwig play League of Legends. It's like, I don't want to fucking watch this guy play. It's miserable. - And it's tough because I think what I found has worked for me, 'cause I still love all those games. And it's not even a viewer fault. It's just, it makes total sense. Like you don't know where they're at in the story. - It's like a viewer experience. You cannot provide the same like one or two hour experience some games can provide over a 33 hour period. - So I do like,

two days of the game that I'm really excited about it. And I say, Hey, there it is. If you guys thought that was really awesome, you can go ahead and finish it on your own. And I got, I got a great experience out of it. And, uh, but we're going to have to move on just because, you know, you find yourself finishing less games. Oh yes. Yes. And as a completionist, that is an absolutely horrible, horrible feeling. Yeah. How far did you get in metaphor?

This is so shameful. It was like, I basically finished the tutorial and then some, and you're talking to the guy who like loves persona started with number one back on the PlayStation played through all five. And I really want to play that game, but it's planet talk.

You know, that's all it is. You go and you talk endlessly to people. - They told me it's a visual novel disguised as an RPG. - That's all the Personas in 3. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's all the Personas. - I mean, like, yeah. I have the opposite of where I can't, I won't start a game if I know I can't beat it, but that just automatically rules out like these amazing games like Metafor and- - Oh no, dude, if you're mad at cut scenes in Metafor, like I think you'll actually want to-

- Honestly, in Persona 5, I was getting driven to the brink on this. - Yeah, and you only played it for an hour. - Yeah, an hour, and I was like, this is fucked up. I've touched the controller three times, and one of them I got lost in Shibuya.

And I was like, this is evil. This is evil because this is like, it should be easier to navigate in real life than in persona. - That's great. What a great game. - That's the game of the year. I don't care when it came out. - Oh my God. - Those games are so great though. And yeah, it's tough games. - But you can't stream those. - Nah, I mean, I try to do a thing that's like 70, 30, right? I try to do 70% stuff where I really keep in mind to the viewer,

And then 30% of the time I'm like, you know, I got to do this for me. This is one for me. Well, it's like I have so many games. One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me. Six for them, one for me. And I'm in a very, very obviously lucky situation where I get to also go on adventures with him and I got to go see you at the Parco building. And I get to kind of spice things up to remind the viewer like, hey, you know, we're still doing other fun stuff. We do stuff. We got this, guys, guys.

Yeah. And then, um, and then we're going back to monkey Island and, you know, so it's, it's that kind of ratio, but I've loved it. I I've never been happier. This has been, I've done more stuff in the past year in my life than collectively, I think 40 years ago.

Kimio did, it's crazy. - Since you've been on last year, how's life in Japan? Changed much? Anything different? You notice any changes? - Year 14. - Yeah, is there any difference between year 13 or 12 or is it pretty much same old, same old?

I'm very glad I got out of the workforce for sure. And I'm, I'm very thankful. So usually in the morning I try to go and grab like a coffee or something, which by the way, tell me if this guy did me a real dirty thing. I went to a, cause we only have like Starbucks near my house. So if you don't like Starbucks, that's fine. It's trash coffee, whatever. But I went there.

And I'm a regular, I go there almost every morning. So just to get some coffee, drink water, hang out, detox, whatever. And this viewer, he noticed me and he was like, "Oh, it's Premiere 2." And I was like, "What's up, man?" He didn't know my name, I had to make that part up. But he was like, "I know you, I know you." And he was like, "You come to this coffee shop often?" I was like, "Yeah, yeah." I was like, "I'm just gonna grab a coffee." He's like, "Okay, me too, I wanna get a coffee."

And I actually had a coupon that's like the one more coffee that you get like, it's like $1.50 or something. And the staff...

I don't know what it is at this particular Starbucks. Every single guy or girl is like a model. They're the most insanely attractive. I think it's because it's a university town and they're all just like young baristas and the guys like cleaning the glass and, and the girl's like,こんにちは. Hey Peter, you're back. And I was like, yeah, I was like, yeah, I'm a regular. And I was like, I was like, I still got it. And, um, I was like, one more coffee, please. She's like, can I have the receipt? And I was like, yeah, here you go. And then she was like,

"That's a McDonald's receipt." And I was like, "Okay, let me take that back." And then she was like, "Wow, is this all for you?" And I was like, "Jesus, no." I was like, "No." I was like, "Yeah." I was like, "No." And then I was like, "Nah, I mean, we went together, right man?" 'Cause I needed a bailout here. This is the bro code. Like, "Yeah, okay, I got a couple of like double bacon cheeseburgers." - Oh, so it was like a coupon if you bought a McDonald's. - No, it was my receipt from McDonald's. And she was just looking at my order and she was like, "That's all for one person." And I was like, "Nah, nah, we split that." And he was, and the guy went, he was like,

- Oh, he broke the bro code. - He broke the bro code. - That could have been an instant bonding moment. - I would have been like, you're a guest on the channel. You're my VIP mod, this man. And he sold me out and I was like, I was really, and then I had to say the thing. I was like, . Like I was so hungry. - She asked you, is this all for? - Well, she was like teasing because I go in there and I ordered it and I was like,

it keeps getting worse and worse. Right. So like, normally I go in there and I always just get a iced coffee. Right. That's it. And they were saying like, oh, we have these new, you know, Mary Berry Christmas lattes. And I was like, nah, I'm on a diet. So I'm just getting, I've been on a diet for 12 years, but I was like, no, I just want the zero calorie coffee. And then she was like, diet ですか? Oh,

- No, it was so brutal. - That's so BM. - Why you got to do strays like that? - I don't know. - What the fuck? - And I was like, one more coffee please. - She's not letting you forget it. - No, she was, that was pretty cold blooded. And the other thing that's tough there is there's another girl who works there that, they have like 40 staff because it's a college town, right? So they're always cycling. And she always is like, do you not remember me? And I'm like, I do.

I don't. She's like, you taught me my senior year the whole time. And I was like, oh, I forgot. Yeah. But you know, that was during COVID. You had the mask. She's like, you use that excuse every time. I was like, I know. Yeah. I'll have three quarter pounders and six bags. But so it was, I got called out by the guy. I got totally sold out, but I forgot the original point. It was something about coffee or coffee.

Oh, I remember now. I got it. So yeah, I go for the, the point of that is I often go to these coffee shops and Japan is so hard and this is why it hasn't changed and what I'm thankful about. The bus is packed. People are on a rush to go to work. The commute is just horrific and I'm evicted

very eternally thankful that I have an opportunity to, to do what I do. And like, because that shit is the most soul crushing experience in Japan. Yeah. It's surviving the work culture. Definitely. Yeah. So for me, I don't think that's changed, but I will be applying for Japanese citizenship this year. Hey, promptly probably be declined when they were like, what's your end level? And I'm like six. They're like, it starts at five. So I'm like, ah,

Do I have to know like kanji? And they'd be like, okay. So, but I'm looking forward to naturalizing as a citizen here. I think it's long enough. Yeah. Nice. I mean, 14 years. Permanent residency is what I have now. And if you don't know what that is, it means I don't have to have a work visa to do what I do. It's a, and it's lifetime, but I feel like I do want to get involved in like local elections or where the communities are at and just having a bit more time.

- Agency? - I had a taxi driver today. He loved politics and he kept talking to me about it. He kept asking me, he's like, "You know, I love history. I love Churchill." 'Cause I mentioned I was British and I was like, "Oh yeah." He's like, "Yeah, he's a really strong leader. Strong leader, isn't he?" I was like, "Yeah, I guess so." He's like, "You know, now they don't have strong leaders." I was like, "Oh, okay." He's like, "You know, Japan, full of weaklings." And I was like, "Oh, you're gonna fix it?" He's like, "Nah."

I was like, are they nice guys? He's like, yeah, they're nice guys, but weak, weak. And then maybe we can get Pete. Yeah. I'm a real, you know, I have a lot of strong policies. Strong policies. Work now starts at 11. Well, there was that one, uh,

politician in Japan who's like, "Your womb should be removed after 30." Did you see that? - Yeah, that was- - It was like an Onion article. "Wombs to be removed after 30." - I think his argument was kind of around the idea of like, we're not having enough babies. - So we'll remove wombs? - Uterus removal. - You don't have enough babies? - He apologized for that. - What the fuck did I come back to? - Yeah, this Japanese politician that was like, "You should remove the uterus after 30."

- Jesus Christ. - It was a pretty hard line. Hey, it made headlines, so his party might have more votes. - Maybe we should remove the penis at 30 if you didn't successfully, we should start with him. - A woman would not be allowed to go to universities from 18 and a law would not allow a single woman over 25 to ever get married. - Oh my God. - Jesus Christ. - What the fuck?

Yeah, of course it's not. Yeah, of course. They got nothing else going on. They're like, let's make some fucking radical policies. This is not, sadly, this is not a terribly uncommon kind of, even in joking culture. Like they, when I first started teaching, the common joke would be, cause you know, you're working with a bunch of people who are in their mid twenties or so. They'd be like, oh, so-and-so is a Christmas cake. And you're like, what's that? And she'd be sitting like right next to me. They'd be like, well, after they're 25 on the 25th, they're useless. And I'm like, what?

And I was like, that's absurd. Yeah, that's like a... It's a Japanese joke. They would just say that in front of them? In front of them. And I was like, you don't have to take that. And I was like...

by the way, I'm a Christmas cake. He's like, no, no, men are okay. I was like, man, fuck this place. So like that kind of mentality is in direct connection with like the absurdity that some of the old fashioned. - It's sad that that's not the first time I've heard that. - See, it's crazy. - Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's- - It sounds like a fucking Alex Jones bit.

- It's like a Christmas cake. They're useless if you're 25. - It's like, I don't know. Sometimes Asian culture, especially with Asian culture, I kind of realized this, but they're way too comfortable making jokes or like having sayings that are just like putting- - Fucked up. - Yeah, just putting a person down. - Well, like a lesser form of that is you're, as soon as you turn 25, you're considered , which is around 30.

- So it's kind of assuming that your best days are already done. - Oh my Lord. - Or Adafo after 35 and so on. - Yeah, God. - Hey, my mom's 74 ready for more. So you can still have a great life. - Yeah, I mean, that's why so many people in Asia, especially women are so conscious about their age because

- It's like wine though, they just get better. - I mean, we should elect us. - Milkman spitting fast. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Local milkman. - But it's true. - Local milkman.

- Local MILF man gets elected. - Yeah, local MILF. Women can only be dated after 30. New policy, new policy. - Put your wounds back in ladies. - Oh man, but it's, yeah. I don't really notice a lot of the changes in Japan now that I'm a total degenerate playing video games all the time now, so. - Yeah, yeah, I kind of realized people- - Some people say you made it. - I did a, I was doing a, I did a Q and A thing where people ask me questions about anything and they just ask me questions like,

you know, how is it living in Japan? I'm like, I, I mean, it's like different. What I do is not a normal way to live here.

And people ask me, how do you move? How do you do all this stuff? It's like, I don't have like a normal way of doing this. I'm the worst person to ask. - Well, I think this is actually really interesting. A lot of people ask me that same question on the channel or just in general. - But like you have many years of experience and like a normal approach to it. - And for me, I left America around 25, 26 years old

- Obviously you're useless. - I was already useless. I couldn't make it. - You laughed past your best self idea. - I was like, I blow out the candles. Couldn't make it, I guess I'm just-- - Pack it in. - That's all we're gonna write for that one. But when I moved here, I feel like the only way I describe it is you gotta ask yourself which stresses are you best equipped to deal with? America stress was really hard for me. It was a bunch of retail jobs. It was a bunch of serving industry stuff.

and I didn't like having to operate the car all the time and pay the fees and try to... Everywhere you went was like this huge ordeal or parking. I felt like...

My theater degree should have been a minor, not a major. In that regard where progress was never really... There was no blueprint for my success. And so when I moved to Japan, I was able to deal with the stresses of living here much better, which are packed trains, which are a little bit longer work schedules, which are scheduling your spontaneities a little bit less as America. There's no spontaneity. They'll be like, let's hang out. This is great. How about on the 23rd of February? And you're like...

What? That's like in three months. But those are the things that I was okay with. But the number one thing of why I stayed and when I visited, I realized was into this day, genuinely, I wake up every day and I still enjoy my environment, where I'm walking, what I'm seeing, what I'm eating, what I'm buying. And I'm...

I enjoy that so much more than I did the United States that it's not even close. - That's a really interesting way. I never thought about putting it in like dealing with the stresses of living in each country. I've never thought, looked at it that way. I just kind of thought like, I like these things about Japan, but never really thought about it. Like, I don't like these parts about the UK, but I guess they go hand in hand, right? - It's like every place you live in is not perfect. - Of course not. - Different stresses, different thing that's,

bother you. But, you know, the daily life overall here is just very good. Yeah. And people, people always like, you must be like playing it up. It can't be that good. I'm like, no, it's,

- It's very nice. - I mean, we would have left otherwise. - It's kind of just insane that everything kind of just works. Like when stuff goes wrong, it's horrible 'cause you have to deal with like so many layers of systems, but like daily life stuff, everything works so seamlessly and you can always rely on everything. And it's, yeah, I mean, not to like fucking jerk off Japan, but I mean.

It's the biggest city on the planet. I survived it sometimes having to steal toilet paper from parks, but I survived it

by a teacher's salary, which is like the lowest entry point. - Four pennies and a shilling. - So I think that if you can make that work, it's pretty good. But my wife would say that Perth was better for her and she's Japanese. So maybe there you go. - Japanese people love Perth for some reason. I don't get it. - I don't either. - It's a bit of a shit hole, sorry Perth. - But I'll be visiting there soon. - Every time someone from Perth, actually I've gotten some viewers the other day who recognize me 'cause of my shoes.

And I was like, "Oh, we use some." They were like, "Perth." And I was like, "Oh, I'm sorry." And they were like, "Oh, you know Perth shit?" I was like, "Yeah, yeah, I kinda know Australia." - It's like, yeah, it's any city in Australia. It's like, there are the people who are like, "Yeah, our place is shit." And then there are people who are just like hardcore, like, "Nah, man, we live in the best city in the world." - I've learned that you can call two cities shit pretty unequivocally. It's Perth, but mainly Canberra.

- Oh yeah, no. Everyone in Australia can agree, Canberra is the worst. And that's our fucking capital. - Oh really? - Yeah. - You could have had Batman. - It's a fucking sports capital rivalry, you know, because you had Melbourne and Sydney. - The only reason, I don't know if you know this, but the reason why we chose Canberra as our capital is because it sits perfectly between Sydney and Melbourne and we couldn't decide on which one. So we picked a random city in the middle. - That's so Australian.

- I love that. - It sounds like sports fan, you know? It's just like, all right, you guys can't agree. We're gonna put the capital here. - You could call both cities Melbourne and split them with a river. - That's Kansas City, isn't it? - Exactly. - Hey look, that would work even five years ago.

But I haven't, I mean, fuck Kansas city. No, I'm kidding. I like Kansas city. It's one of my favorite places to, to raise a family. I'm going to go to the real quick. You don't. Cause he's already leaving. He just makes fun. There you go. But yeah, it's, it's, it's, um, Kansas city was where I had what? A dozen different jobs. So being a part of a city like that was, uh,

- It was great. - It was wild. - What was the best job you had there?

Let me just go through a list. All right. Let's go through your entire resume. I think I've already forgotten so many. Yeah. Let's go through your resume. So I started at a flea market called Ricky's Flea Market. I was 13 years old and I was not paid in cash, but she did have a selection of gag gifts from like a Pee Wee Herman movie, like gum that would make your mouth turn like black or blue, stink bombs, things like

that. Right. So I, 13, that's illegal. First job. Yeah. So that was, then I, then I went to a, I worked at a coffee shop called todos, you know, like Dorothy and wizard of Oz. Yeah. And I was promptly fired from that when they put me by myself at a location that was like brand new and somebody got sick. So it was like my fourth day and everyone was like, there was like a huge line for some reason. And I was like, uh,

And I panicked. And there was one guy like literally wanking off in the corner because there's a library and they had the computer. I had to call the police. I got fired. It was done. That was 15 years old. Then I took a break from jobs after those two. I was like, all right, I'm just hating stink bombs. And I got police called on some weirdo. So then...

after that we got into college and I had a whole series of waiting tables, which was great work. Cause you get the money that day and then immediately go buy video games or cards that night. Right. So we had Applebee's Chili's red Robin, uh,

There was one more in there, but I can't remember. It's gone now. GameStop was a big one. That was fun. We've worked at Z95.7, Today's Shit Music. That was a good one. I worked at the Olive Garden briefly. You worked at Olive Garden? That one actually was really unfortunate.

So this one actually has a different story that it's going to intercede. Is that okay? Yeah. This is a, one of the worst dates of my entire life. It was, it was very bad. Started on a date, worked in the kitchen. No, but it was, so, um,

I had just got this, I really loved this girl. She was so sweet. She was so awesome. And I was a senior and she was a junior and we, I just graduated. So I was moving into the college thing and she was just becoming a senior. And I was like, well, I won't see her in the hall anymore. I should ask her out. Like I can do this. So I got all my buddies around me because that's what I did back then. I was like, I'm going to call her. Here we go. Get the boys to hype you up. And I was like,

And I was like, I was like, so I was like, it's busy. So we had to like wait and we're like, what are you going to say? I was like, I'm gonna let it come to me. And they're like, you should come up. I was like, I got this. So I was like, and then I was like, Hey, you know, so I call her and I was like, Hey, I was thinking that, um, this would be so cool if you and I, my boys were like,

I was like, yeah, we should go out and have a date. And she'd be like, I really like that. And then everybody was just like, yo! And she was like, I was like, sorry, they're watching sports. And I was like, you know, cut it out. And so I just got my license at 18 because we couldn't afford a car at that time until then. But my mom was kind enough to get me this old white car.

Cadillac not Cadillac but like that kind of Oldsmobile yeah and my mom had just got a new Ford Focus and I said can I please borrow your car so that I could show up without like you know this thing that's smoking out the back yeah and she was like oh of course just just be careful I love you and I was like okay and then at that time my sister already moved out so we had my cousin Justin living with us upstairs and he was like in his mid-20s he's like yo bro you're going out with the

girl tonight? I was like, yeah. He was like, what's your plan? I was like, I'm going to take her to where I used to work at the Olive Garden. And he was like, bold. And I was like, no, man, you get like breadsticks. He's like, okay, it's fine. All right. And he's like, what about after that? And I was like, well, I was working at the radio station at that time. And I was a celebrity judge at an improv show. Yeah, I remember this story. Yeah. So sorry, you have to hear it again. No, no, no, I don't mind. So I got this one. Oh, my God. Well,

So the I was like I get to be a celebrity judge because the actual guests couldn't make it and then he was like dude That's sick. He was like, all right. Look, I don't know how things are gonna turn out tonight But just in case I was like, what is that? He was like, it's a condom you idiot I was like, huh? What do I do with that? He's like, I don't have time to explain all that He was like just put that in your coat and don't you worry about the thing? He's like you got this big man, and I'm have no intention of using this I don't even I'm not interested in that at all. All right

I'm just trying to focus on Olive Garden, Don't Eat Too Much, and then Improv Show. So I take the car, I pick her up, we go to the Olive Garden, and they were really nice because they were like, hey, used to work here, what's up, man? And I was like, you know, it's not just the free breadsticks. They gave me some other perks too, like a dessert. And I was feeling like, I was like, this is so sick. You were like the shit.

This is so perfect. And then we went to the improv show and it's hilarious. Everybody's laughing. Everybody's having a good time. And I'm giving out big scores. You know what the numbers are. And they were like, and now we're going to bring up the celebrity judge to do an improv game with us. And I was like, oh,

I fucking killed. It was awesome. It was so funny. In my memory, people are going like, Pete, Pete. But I don't think they, my name was Kramer, I guess. But they were like, people were going nuts. Everybody was like vibing and everyone was coming up to me. Man, that was so funny what you did. And I was like, oh, thanks. And I looked at her and I was like, yeah, you know, I take an improv class at college.

You know, I'm like, I'm just, you know, I'm just feeling it. I'm feeling so good. So we get in the car, and she's like, I'm cold. And I was like, you can have my jacket and stuff. And I'm doing, like, the cool thing. The chivalry thing? The chivalry. I'm feeling chivalrous. Oh, yeah. And I'm freezing my ass off. But we're driving around, and I said, well, you know, it's only, like, 930, 945. Do you know we can go home? Or I could, uh...

drive us around for a while. And she's like, I'd like that. I was like, okay. So then I adopt the cool guy position where it's like, this is an automatic. So I don't even need the clutch. It's just, it's just the thing that puts it in. It's a power stance. It's a power stance. And so we stop at this, this red light and we're not, it's not even really, I think it was around winter. Cause I know it's cold. So maybe we were looking at Christmas lights or something. And, uh,

I'm at, it wasn't even a red light. It was a stop sign. So I'm at the stop sign and I'm chilling and, and she, uh, she puts her hand on top of mine and I freaked the fuck out and hit the gas and I T-bone this other car coming right in front, like slammed it like a sports car. There was like a Corvette or something. I, I T-bone that cause I panicked so hard. I was like, let's go. And then like, I, I,

I'm driving through someone's lawn and she's like, stop the car, stop the car. And I'm like, what? And I'm like, gonna, I'm knocking over like Christmas decorations and I like turn the car around and I was like, oh my God, what have I, I don't have a cell phone because like before I had one but no, they didn't exist yet. So,

So I had to go knock on the person's door who I just drove through their yard. And I was like, oh no, I'm so sorry. Can I please use your phone? And they were like, is everybody okay? I was like, yeah. And of course I checked on the other person. They were totally fine. I'd hit their passengers and it wasn't. She was by herself. And I like, I dented the front of their car, but you know,

And I think there was like a brief moment where I probably blamed someone else. I was like, didn't they have it? She was like, it's a two, it's your stop sign. I was like, damn it. So it was all my fault. And, uh, I look at the car and it won't start. I totally smashed the front of this brand new Ford Focus. Oh,

And I was like, oh, fuck. And so I couldn't reach her because I was calling home and I think she was with her friends or maybe she was watching a movie. I don't know. She probably was on a sixth edible. I don't know. So we had to call her mom. And I was like, I'm so sorry. I had this accident. And can you please come pick us up? We're at this place. And she was like, oh, yeah. Are you guys OK? I was like, yeah. And I already gave the insurance. The other person's OK. They left already. Everyone's fine.

She's like, okay, I'm on my way. I'll be there in like 30 minutes. I was like, okay. So now we're outside and she's like, she gets my coat and I'm just like, I'm so sorry. This is so embarrassing. And she was like, no, you know what? It was still a really fun night and I had a good time. And I was like, thank you. So her mom never shows up. Like we don't see her. We don't know. It's been like 45 minutes and the family comes back outside and they said, is something wrong? I was like, can I try calling home again?

And we call my cousin. He was like, bro, what's up? How was the date? And I was like, I totaled my mom's car. Can you please come pick us up? He's like, what? I only have like a truck and I've got like a deer thing in the deer head in the front. And I was like, that's okay. We'll all squeeze in the back. And he was like, all right, man, where are you at? And I was like, I'm over here. So he comes and picks us up.

Then we're driving. So the Yamanote circles around Japan. Kansas City has a similar highway called 435, which just circles the city. We're on 435 going back. And this girl I'm with is like, stop your car. Wait, I think I see my mom. Her car had broke down on 435. Oh my God. So we picked up her mom.

And I'm in the middle between like mom and daughter. And he was Justin's driving with the stupid deer head in the front. And all I can see is like his eyes and like the faint outlook of like a smile above his teeth. He's like, and he was like, so how was the olive garden? I was like, it was fine. And he was like,

I guess you're not going to need that thing in your pocket. And I was like, no, he didn't say that in the car. Oh, Justin's a dick. So Justin, so when she goes like this and then she like, I swear, this is how I remember it, but there's no clean ending to this story because I think I blacked out. If you were to film it, she like pulls it out and then the mom's looking and I'm doing this, he's smiling and then the Larry David music plays. And it's like executive produced by go fuck yourself. And I don't know,

- I don't know how I got out of that situation. - That's so evil. Your cousin did you so good. - He didn't know that she was wearing the jacket, but that, yeah, Olive Garden, GameStop. - This is literally the in-between-a-plot. - Yeah, this is. - Have you watched the in-between-as? - No. - This is your life.

Dude, that was literally your life. That was a pretty, that's crazy. That was a cool story though. It's literally about like, it didn't happen to me, but yeah, we, we, you know, so my mom, you know, to her credit, I went home and I was like, she was, I mean, she had just got this car and I was so embarrassed and I was like, I'm so sorry, mom. And she's like, you know, you've always been,

my favorite son. I'm like, I am your only son. She goes, she always says that too. And I hang up the, you're my favorite son. She was like, as long as you're both healthy, I'm fine. I'm just sad that, you know, you could, I couldn't help you more. And I was like, damn mom, I'm sorry. You, you're the true one. And I was like, and I was like, what are you going to do for work? She goes, you know what? We'll fit where she always says we're Macy's. We'll figure it out. So,

- Oh yeah. - So she quit. - So she lost the job. - She lost her job on Monday. - It was, that was the, that was one of the worst first dates, but also one of the best. - I mean, it's certainly the most memorable.

- A character building, some say. - Yeah, for sure. - Yeah, a character building. It writes itself. - Briefly, I was also an usher at a, I worked at three movie theaters, but this one leads to one more date story. Is that okay? - Yeah, of course, man. Go crazy. - This one's way shorter.

- So I was a master usher at a theater. - Okay, wait, wait. What is the difference between an usher and a master usher? Who wants to usher the ushers? - I'm glad you asked. I was like a butler of sorts. I was able to coordinate the other ushers, but that means they had to come to me for their instructions. - How old are you at this point? - I think I was 34. No, I'm kidding. I was 20.

- How old are these ushers, like 16? - Yeah, some of them were, I think we were all college students. It was out of the theater at college. - You were just distinguished above the rest. - Special treatment. And that also worked towards my shop class so that I was working for hours of like, 'cause I didn't wanna paint or build. So this girl who I had like the hugest crush on, she was so beautiful and I had never talked to her ever. She was an usher that night because she was like, she needed the hours for the class.

And she was like, are you like the master usher or something that I have to talk to? And I was like, yeah, but you know what? You don't have to do anything. I was such a wimp. I was like, you can just chill and do your own thing. She was like, oh, so it's like, you're not even worth anything. You're not doing anything. I was like, no, no, no. I was like, I definitely have a lot of control. You know what? Actually, I'm going to need you at the front. You have like this, you got, let's go get her attitude. And I was like, wow, that was, I need my bros to hype me up for this. And so afterwards- So you called them all in. Called them all in. So afterwards I was like-

I told her, I was like, you know, that was, that was really fun. You know, she was like ushering. And I was like, ah, yeah. I was like, you know, this is something I don't normally do, but I'm just going to swing here. I was like, you seem really cool. And I'd like to get to know you better. Do,

do you just want to go out and get like coffee or something sometime she was like you know what that was a lot better than your usher game so yeah let's do that that'd be fun i was like that's sick so we went out we had coffee it's a great time and then she said um you know like a week later or something at school we passed in the halls and she said why don't you you know come to my my place tonight you know my friends are out of town and uh i've got the i've got the whole apartment i was like

okay, yeah, that sounds cool. Of course, I'll be there. What time you want to show up? She's like, seven, 730. I was like, yeah. It's pretty late. I was like, I do that shit all the time. That's cool. So I go there and I'm like, very nervous. I'm like, and I, I am, I just, I'd never had this opportunity before. Like when, like, I feel like,

Things were in motion that were beyond my understanding. Right. And I was like, I don't know why I navigate these uncharted waters. Yeah. So I go up there and we're watching a movie and I do the thing where every guy does. I like, I sit as far away from her as possible because I'm, I don't know the vibe. And then I go to the bathroom and I sit like a little closer and

And then I go to the bathroom again. Cause I was like, I should have sat closer. And I do like five times. She's like, is something wrong with your bladder? I'm like, no, no, no. I'm just, I'm just that awkward feeling of like slowly, like it is so real. You're like, yeah, not, yeah. You know, move your hand like this. I know. It's so good. Like I actually am getting kind of nervous even telling these stories because I,

The thing about those, and I had a really great acting coach who you may remember called the radio station and defended me. He said, he goes, you know, man, when you're in these relationships and like, whether it's been like 10 years or you meet someone for the first time, you really got to like appreciate dude, those, those real raw moments where you're like vulnerable and you don't know because someday you're going to be married like me and all that shit's going to be gone. It's a routine. And I was like, whoa. And he was like, no, I'm kidding, man. We have new things. But

But he's like, "These are really vital." And I was like, "Okay." And that was in my mind. So I'm like, heart's pumping. And I do the thing that you do, you know? - Yeah. - You're like, oh. - You're like, slowly your hand is like, yeah, no, actually this is a good sitting position. And then you're like, all right. - And then once the arm was around, it was like a glove and a baseball. We just felt like this. And it felt like, I was like, this is so cool. This is so awesome.

We're watching this movie and I feel like dude. This is the time to go for the kiss cuz this movie is like lame as fuck This is like the longest movie I've ever seen I think I chose like Magnolia and it's a good movie But like I was like get something long so you're there for like four hours And I go in and we start to like this brief kiss and it's like it's moving towards something and then suddenly I get like this on the door this dude is like I'm not gonna say her name. I'll say her name is Rachel. He's like Rachel open the door

I hear some movies in there. I know you're not alone. And she's like, get out of here. I don't want to see your face. And I was instantly, I'm like, Oh, this is not what I, and he was like, who else is in there? Who's the other motherfucker in there? I want to know who that motherfucker is. And I was like, I can't do this. I'm not strong. And I was like, she was like, yeah, he could kick the shit out of you. You piece of shit. And I'm glad I left your ass. And he was like, who is it? Who is it? Who is it? And I,

And like, they are arguing and I'm just sitting there totally terrified. Terrified. And eventually he was like, I ain't gonna forget this and I'll be waiting outside. I'll be waiting outside, motherfuckers. And I was like, oh God, please don't do this. And he left. He feasibly left. And she has like a breakdown now. Now she's crying and I'm like, oh fuck.

This is all wrong. And so we're trying to like fix this thing. And I'm like, don't worry about it. And she like stood up on the couch. She was a shorter girl. She stood up on the couch and was like looking through the blinds. She was like, he's gone. He's a loser. I fucking hate that guy. And I walked over to her and I was like, it's okay. And then like at that one moment, we were like the exact same height. Right. I said, it's going to be all right. I'm here.

I'm not going to do anything, but I was like, I won't help, but I'm here. And then we had like this passionate embrace. Hell yeah. And I was like, let's fucking go. This is sick. I crushed. And then she's like, oh, you know, I used to be this model. Do you want to see some of the pictures? Like, yeah, of course. Of course. You're very beautiful.

And I'm going through these pictures and I was like, yeah, these are great. And then like some of them are kind of, yeah, I'm like, yes, yes. Some of them are kind of artistic. And I'm like, well, these are, these are lacking a lot of the clothing that I normally see, but this is very, it's very cool. Black and white, whatever. And then she goes, yeah, I'm here. Let's just, I have some more in my room. Do you want to come take a look at it? And I was like, yeah, sure. Totally missed that signal. Like it was just fired right past me. So I go into her room.

And she's like, I think they're over by the bed. And she's like, whatever, getting near the bed. And on her wall, she had like this enormous poster. It was huge. It was like as big as the TVs we get for free now. But it was like John Lennon. But all of his face was smaller pictures of John Lennon. Like a mosaic. Yeah, it was like a giant mosaic. And I was like, I was just lost at staring at that. And I was like, this is crazy. There's so many John Lennons. I didn't even think. And then she was like,

whoa, why don't you come sit next to me? And I was like, yeah, just one second. I was like, some of these even have the Beatles, but I thought they broke up and he's dead. And she's like, yeah, it's just a poster. And I was like, oh yeah. And I turn around, she's completely naked. Completely naked. Completely. Damn. And she said, she kind of like does this thing. She goes, just make yourself comfortable. I'm like, uh. And here's what I did. So bad. So bad.

I took off my shoes and laid next to her. And I was just sitting there like now, like sweater. And I'm just so scared. Well, you are comfortable. You were very comfortable. She was like, isn't that hot? And I was like, no, no. And she's like, well, you know, the bed has covers. I'm like, yeah, that's how I always sleep. And, you know, I wish that there was a natural end to this story.

I didn't have the courage to go through with that. I felt like everything was just happening too fast. I got hit just by a bang on the door. - Yeah, that's a good mock. - And I just felt like this is not right for me right now. And so I was like, this is so crazy and cool, but I think I need, I gotta go. - You're so cool and crazy, but I gotta go. - I gotta go. - I was like, I don't think I can even stand up for the next four hours. - Do you mind if I finish the movie though?

It was... That was the other dating story that I fondly remember where I looked at a poster and I saw a naked woman and took off my shoes. I can't... It's so lame. It's so funny. It's so pathetic. I don't think you...

if you were cool in your dating life when you're like 18, I think something's gone wrong. Yeah. No, I don't think I ever got cool. Yeah, you have to fuck up. Yeah, but I mean, like if you were, if you were like, yeah, I was 16 and I just kind of knew everything. It's like, what? No, it's meant to be awkward. Yeah. Enjoy it. It was very awkward. So,

- That was fun, but I was working as an usher there. I worked for Bose, the music company. - What the fuck? - I worked at Best Buy, Circuit City. I worked at the mall, briefly selling. Oh, that was fun. I worked at like one of those Sunglass Hut things, and across from me,

It was so annoying because it was this other kiosk that had calendars. That was like the only thing they sold, like a classic mall in America. And the one that was always there was, it was, it's my favorite thing to watch. It was a calendar called studs and spurs. And it was these cowboys with like six packs and their boots in like,

jeans on. And every, I would just, that's like all that's facing me is the studs and spurs catalog. And I loved watching women walk by and double take and then kind of be like, should I buy it? Should I look at March? Like what does October look like? And I'd be like, I'd always be like, are the months the same as they always were? I need to check. I was like, just buy it. I was like in that age, but, uh, movie theaters, uh,

countless restaurants. God damn, you've done everything. What haven't you done, man? It was a lot. It was a lot of different jobs here and there. You talking about your dating thing reminded me of when Chris was telling us about his first kiss. We snogged Tom Scott for three hours or whatever he said. What did he say? He said, yes, we weren't doing it. And then suddenly we snogged for three hours. Yeah.

And I was like, he made it sound so clinical. And I was like, it's such a passionate. - Snog is the worst. - Such a passionate embrace. - And then he was like, three hours of snogging is finished. - Yeah, I can imagine. And he's like, was that good? It was good, wasn't it? - Was that pleasant? - Yes. - So, but yeah.

- I have flashbacks to terrible dating. - Yeah, we've all been there. - Actually your story had just give, I think you unlocked so many core memories that I just like buried. - You unlocked about three terrible dates. - Some people and they liked this show and they were like, yeah, we like it 'cause it kind of taught us to like, don't worry about being yourself. I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? Don't worry about being yourself. And I was like, oh.

- No way, actually I remember when I liked this girl, I would literally do anything that I thought she liked. I would be like, who am I? I don't even know. I love Twilight and I love One Direction. Like that's what I, that's me. That's what I love. - Notebook is the best movie. - I love the Notebook. Notebook's amazing. - Let's run it again. - Yeah, why not? Let's run it back. I always forget that awkward part of where you're like,

- Where you think like you as a guy or, I mean, it's pretty, very like a relatable thing where you're just like, you just think that whatever you're into is automatically not what they're into. Thus you need to change everything. And you're like, yes, I like what you like and movies. - I like that thing you just mentioned to me for two seconds.

- I know all about it, let me guess. - I can formulate the perfect personality that will make her like me. - Yeah, exactly. - We will have the same interests. - And it's like this really awkward. - And what's so sad though, and I think times are better now, but I remember

- I remember growing up. - I don't know about that. - Well, I mean, maybe not. I mean, in this regard that I'm about to say. - Okay, okay. - When I grew up, it was a very still misogynistic culture about like trying to date as many people as you can. I had zero success with this, but that was like, and then- - But that was the vibe, right? - It was like, oh yeah. - It was like deeper culture, right? - Yeah, I mean, it was just like, you know, we wanna,

all that consumed our thoughts was like, I want to date girls or I want to be with some girl. - Well, it was like losing your virginity was like such a big- - Well, that was cause like American Pie had also come out when we were in like school. - Yeah. - It was like a big thing at the time. - But it was always like such a big like, oh, I don't know, like every,

- Every guy always talks about- - If they had sex, they were like, "Cool." - If they had sex and it was always like- - It's like, "Bro, you're still a virgin? "Will you gay?" - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was always like the lead up to like the big event. And like, I got to a point where I'm like, damn. I looked to my left, I looked to my right, and I'm like, "I'm the only one. "I'm going to college, man. "I'm going to university, shit." - Shit, that's so real. Fuck. - You know what I mean?

And I'm like, damn, is there something wrong with me? I just have zero fucking game. - It's like, damn, maybe I am gay. - I remember that I also worked at a FedEx Kinkos as an overnight shift where I was- - Okay, I mean, did you just like, we were a completionist of jobs? - That was actually the best because I could bring my PC in there and play World of Warcraft during the entire night. - Oh my God. - We had no business. - Wait, the full on like,

Like fucking giant. I had to bring the tower. Yeah, yeah. What the fuck? You brought it in every shift? Or my friends would bring board games and we'd just play, you know, games and stuff. But I remember when this was, this was in my 20s or whatever, early 20s. And it was, it was during that culture of that. And I remember somebody had bought a enormous,

giant, huge printout of the whole world. And then they didn't need it, but it was on this really thick poster vinyl. And so I had it hanging up in my basement and we were playing games one day and a third friend was like, we should like have a game where it's like, we all have different bases and we should try to like meet women.

And like, we can have a competition to see who can have the most women from different countries. It's like risk. And I was like, that sounds fun. The only problem with that was after about three months, we had to change the rules. I was like, what if we talk to foreign women? Like, instead of being with them, like if there's, what if we just said like, I saw someone from Europe. Do I get to claim Europe? And I was like, this isn't us guys. We're not, we're not cool. We're not, we're not,

dating like that. And even then we were like, this is not our culture, but we have this cool map. And I was like, why don't we just play risk with it? So yeah, it was, it was during that whole American pie, cheese mo. And I think these days people are a lot more accepting and like, I think at least in Japan students were. Yeah.

- Yeah, I mean, I think 'cause like now there isn't that like weird expectation or like social pressure to be like, you gotta, if you're a dude and you're 16 years old and you haven't lost your virginity then you suck. - I guess, quite a question to our younger audience. Is there still a pressure to hook up and lose your virginity? - If there is, don't worry about it.

- If there is, don't worry about it. I'm just curious because it was such a huge formative part of our childhoods. And it was such a huge factor in like judging our own self worth. And now we are much older and we're like, shit that shit was like stupid and worthless. - It was completely crazy. - It was so toxic. - It was, it was so dumb, but,

- Yeah, that was a different era. - Yeah, I mean, also I just don't think, part of the reason I think it might still be there is just because I don't think we can get rid of horniness as a teenager. - That might be it. - Of course not. - You hit puberty and those hormones hit hard. - I'd like budge into the door and I'd come. You know what I mean? - Stomp my toe and. - Fuck. Being a teenager was very different. It was a very simpler time.

- It was very different. - I remember, oh man, my first experience, my first ever experience like feeling that like emotion, whatever you wanna call it. So I was like, we were at our computer

And we were still in school, right? So this is right around the time of like puberty age, right? And I was like, me and the boys, we was like computer class and we were just like playing, I think we were like playing Age of Empires II or some shit like that. - Hell yeah, Age of War. - At school?

- Yeah, at school. - You had Age of Empires on your PC? Do you know what you mean, Age of War? - No, I'm pretty sure it was Age of Empires. - What the fuck? - Because some guy found a way to install it on the fucking computer PCs. So it was like lunchtime. So it was like, you know, a lot of people were out, but me and a few other kids were playing. - How does this get from Age of Empires to Jack It Off? - I don't know, I don't know. But I remember one of the girls in my class

Like she comes up to us and it was just after PE. So PE is like physical education. So she was like wearing her like- - Sports clothes. - Sports clothes, right? And you know, female sports clothes back in the day was just like, she was just wearing like a really long t-shirt, right? And I remember she comes up to us like us group of boys and she's like, "Hey, wanna see something cool?" - Uh oh. - She didn't know. - No. - And she was just like,

- What the fuck? - And I was like, and then she was like, and then just ran off. And I was like- - What the fuck? - I'm serious, I'm serious. - That's burned into your brain. - And I was like, that's weird. I was just like, I just-

- What's crazy is I tried the same thing last week. Oh, now I have a check mark on my, yeah. - The reason it's gone into my memory, it was 'cause like, I remember as a kid, I was like, that's weird. I don't like, I was like, that's a bit weird. So I would go back to playing Age of Empires and I'm like,

why can I not stop thinking about what I've just seen? This is so weird. - The game is very boring. - What's the most important? - Why is gaming not my top priority? That's occupying my mind right now. This is so weird. - Oh my God. - That's great. - This like burned into my memory.

But yeah, that was a very weird experience. - She changed your life forever. - What the fuck? That's insane. - Yeah. - Literally, literally. - I would also, if that happened to me, I would probably remember that for the rest of my life too. - I think I'm gonna remember the story for the rest of my life. The audacity of this last. - I remember telling you the story.

- They used to have this channel in the UK called, it was called Babe Station. Do you remember this thing? - Oh yeah, yeah. - Babe Station? - Yeah. - That's way worse than the map. - It was basically those like channels that would go live at like 11:00 PM on like page 95.

- You'd be like pressing up, up. Because even the remote wouldn't go to it when you feel like 95. You find it. It would just basically be these women who'd be like, "Hey, call us, we're like sexy or whatever." But it would only be on screen for, I don't know why, it was only on screen for like 30 seconds. So it was always like a fucking race against the clock to like try and, I'd be like, "Hold, hold, hold." And you're like, "I don't." And then it would go off and you'd be like, "No!"

- Oh, I nutted to a fucking vacuum commercial. - But that's the worst version, the predating version of that in America was during when cable was a thing, this was like high school, right? And we would all be maybe middle school, early high school. We would be sitting around the TV that has cable, but not HBO, Cinemax, and that's what we called it back then. And like the other movie channels. And we'd be watching the distorted like blur. And then somebody would be like,

I saw the boob. I'm like, no, you didn't. You did not. And I was like, wait, maybe that was. And I was like, I think that's a nipple. And we would sit there and just hope.

And like we would see it in the squiggles and in the discolored coloring that like popped in. And sometimes you get like a glorious, like it just somehow the planets would align. Yeah. And you'd get like six minutes of like a movie and you'd be like, get the tape recorder, hit record. It was, that was the old days. You had page 95. We had Skinamax distorted boobs. Um,

- I mean, kids now, I feel sorry for them. They have the whole thing in their hands with not the- - They got everything. - They also have that in their hands. - Don't even have to work for it. - They don't even have to play- - They don't know the real struggle of having to be secretive. All they do is fucking go into incognito and that's all the job they need to do.

I might have, I know I did. I definitely printed off a naked woman's picture once from the internet. - Really? - For sure. - Yo, yo, yo, same here. - Are you mocking me? - Don't worry about it. - What the fuck? - And then you would like fold it up and be like, someday I'll, and then you'll forget and your mom will be like, I found this clean. You're like, it's like Carmen Electra or something. I don't know, but like, who knows?

- Oh my God, Ash, you just unlocked a cool memory. - Well, the other thing, I think we talked about this, I think, 'cause all of our conversations go back to Kazaa and LimeWire. - Your dad found it? - Yeah. - My friends found it. - Oh. - Yeah, 'cause I put it, I stupidly, so I don't know if I've told this story, maybe I have, but I remember it was like my first time discovering hentai. It wasn't even like women, it was just like hentai, right?

and it was just like anime girls back in the day. And then I just like printed them off and I hit them in a gaming magazine. - That's the worst I've ever seen. - It was a Nintendo magazine. - Damn. - Oh my God. - I was like,

Ain't no way anyone's ever gonna find this. 'Cause my parents don't give a shit about gaming. So I was like, they're not gonna find it. The gaming magazine is the last place they'll ever look. - It turns out it wasn't the last place they ever looked. - So it turns out my parents don't look at Nintendo magazines. My friends do though. I had friends over and we were playing games. I think we were playing like Smash Bros or something. I went to the toilets.

I came back and like the fucking, the magazine was like fully open with all like the pictures spread out.

I'm like, the biggest bullshit I could say was like, I'm holding onto them. - I'm surprised the bloody thing opened. - It's my cousins actually. - What are those? - Yeah. - I don't know. - Don't worry about it. - I remember this is back when like Bluetooth was just kind of starting like, and I had this on the flip phones, which, you know, we would always send each other like videos after like, you know, it would be like 10 P. - Yeah. - And this one guy was like, I've got fucking, I've got porn.

- Oh my God, I had that experience too. - I was like, no shit. I was like, yo, can you send me? He's like, yeah sure, don't tell anyone, don't tell anyone. And so he's sending it to me, it's Bluetooth and it's taking fucking forever and it canceled once. And I was like, dude.

- Halfway. - You're like, come on, send it to me, I need it. - Dude, the school is ending in like 30 minutes. And I was like, dude, we got 30 fucking, it's like fucking Mission Impossible, trying to download the fucking coordinates to that. I was like, send me the fucking video, dude. Come on, what the fuck, man? 'Cause you know, at the time, it wasn't even that like, I didn't even know what to do with porn. It was just like a status symbol in school to have that.

- Yeah. - To have access to it. - Like he was the cool kid. - Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I could stand it too. - So maybe the 90s weren't the best. I take it all back now. Unbridled off to us again. - I remember I finally, you know, it didn't happen that day and I was like,

and he's gonna, tomorrow, you better not fuck me on this. Don't fuck me on this tomorrow. And so next day we go in and he's like, "Don't worry, I'll send you over lunch." So, you know, and you have to stay next to each other. So, you know, I'm saying like, you know, we're just chatting, whatever. And I finally get it and I'm like, "Yeah, okay, shit, okay." So I wait till I get home and I open it and I open this porn. It's like five seconds of the blurriest shit in existence. You cannot see anything. And all you can hear is like the most scuffed,

- That was all you needed though. - Honestly, honestly. Yeah, I'm not proud of it. I'm not proud of it. But you couldn't make anything out. And I think I was jacking off more to the idea of porn. I was like, yeah, it's porn. - At that point you have no idea what to expect. - So I'm like, sure, whatever. Yeah, I can make it work. - So in your brain, you're just like, this is what porn is, I guess.

Oh, that's, yeah, that's crazy. That's interesting being a teenager. Yeah. Yeah. Some things never change, huh? Nope. Some things never change. God damn. You guys remember your first kiss?

- Yeah, we spoke about this. - That was unfortunate. - Well, okay, here's the thing, the distinction we had to make, which is like, maybe you had like that first kiss where you had like a little peck on the playground with a girl. - Oh no, I'm talking about like- - Like a full on kiss. - A full on kiss. - Yeah, dude, it was a fucking mess.

- Yeah, mine was kind of magical. - Fuck off, Joey. - Get the fuck out of here. - In my head it felt magical. - There's no way it was magical for her. I don't believe it. - She's on another podcast saying, "Oh, I had a horrible experience." - This fucking piece of shit. - We went at her house. It was me, her, and then like my guy friend and her girlfriend. And it was just like the four of us, I was like,

- 11, I think. So I was like, what? - 11? - All right, done one. - I was like, damn. - 11? - I was like 11. - What the fuck?

- Yeah, nah, I left college in 10. Meanwhile he's like 11, yeah, I already got a name. - Yeah, she was naked, I was 33. This virgin thing, I'm gonna figure it out, I'm really excited. You're like, yeah, 11, I was making out. - Mind you, between this first kiss and me losing my virginity, there was a large gap. - I just don't believe it was magical then. If it was magical, you would have pounced on it. - No, it was- - Magical at 11?

- Magical you would have carried that confidence into like everything. - I remember like we were just like hanging out and then my mom came to pick me up from her house and then she was like, "Oh, I'll go with you to like, you know, go say, yeah, go get the door for you or whatever." And the thing I vividly remember it. I'm like, I step out of the house, I turn around to say something to her and she just grabs my face.

So wait, that's exactly what happened to me. And then mine was anti-magical. This exact same thing. So basically, but it was my house and her sister came to pick her up. And when I said like, okay, that was fun. She reached in and like started to make out with me. And I felt like the semblance of a tongue. And I pulled her back and said, what are you doing? And then she ran to the car.

- No, no, okay. For me, there was no tongue. - Why was it magical then? - It was magical because one, it was literally my first kiss. I liked this girl as well at the time. So it just felt more, but I didn't know because I was a little bitch boy. I was too afraid to ask like, "Hey, do you like me? Because I like you." - Send me a note, circle yes. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was literally doing the no thing, right? So like in my head, I was just like, "Oh man, you know, I want to like stick around with her, you know, and like hang out, but I, you know,

My mom's come to pick me up, so I can't.

And you know, I had no idea that she liked me as well. So it was, it all just happened so fast. Like she literally grabbed my face, just went like that and then said bye and then slammed the door. - Like you're a fucking toddler bro. - And like I- - You're like, did that just happen? - And the walk from her, from the door to my mom's car, I was just floating. - Yeah, you never touched the ground. - I never touched the ground. I was like, that was awesome.

- Was your first kiss good? - Oh no, it was like horrible. - 'Cause like I was, I think I got my first kiss pretty late. Like how old were you guys? 'Cause I was like- - I was in high school. - 13. - 16, 17. - 15, 16, 14. - Damn, am I the weird one? - No, I think you're,

- Well, among weirdos. - You're like our god. - I didn't even start talking to girls until I was like pretty late before, you know, I was pretty late. - I'd love to hear your story. - I remember we were on the beach and- - Sounds magical. - It's Brian Beach, so turn the magic down by like a half. - We got the stone beach. But, yeah.

it was kind of like a small gathering at that point where a lot of us, in America you had the mall, where I grew up, we had the beach, right? And I remember there was this girl

who had just, you know, he was just from like another school. It was like the first time I talked to her. - She's real, I swear. - Huh? - She's real, I swear. - She's real, she's real, I swear, she's real. I will not, I still remember her name to this day because God. This shit be like a core memory to me. - Yeah. - And so, you know, it was the first time that

I'd ever, I guess, held a long conversation with a girl that wasn't, you know. - We kiss now. Conversation complete. Kissing time. Commence. - It's time to snog for three hours. - Conversation complete. And I remember we were,

it was like my first attempt, I guess like trying to flirt and that shit. I'm like, ain't no way this is actually working. No fucking way that something is happening right now. So I remember there was just a small, there's just like a small group of us, right?

And we were sitting by the West Pier, which the West Pier, if you don't know, is a pier that crashed and burned down in Brighton, which definitely was a metaphor for what was about to transpire. And so-

I felt some chemistry going and I was just like, do I kiss? What's the right signal to kiss? How do people know this shit? How do people know? - Should I ask? Can I kiss you now? - Can I kiss? - We were vibing, we were sitting pretty close together. And I was like, I feel I can get close. I feel like I can kiss. We're like good chemistry.

- Luckily, she was clearly more experienced than me. So we looked in the eyes and then she just goes like that. And I was like, holy shit, that is the fucking go button. That is the go button.

- Like a fucking sleeper agent being activated. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is the go button. And I just felt a shot of adrenaline. - Yeah, of course, yeah. - And I was like, holy shit, this is happening. Fucking first thing that happens. - Uh-oh, do you bang heads? - Oh, bang heads. - Oh, terrible, terrible. - I fucking, speed of light, I'm just like, oh shit, she gave me the go. Bam, like that. And I'm like, and she's like, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, don't worry.

And I proceed to be like, is it still okay to like, and she's like, yeah, yeah, sure. For one, asking for like permission to do this shit. - May I? - Yes, may I ma'am? Probably like the negative fucking riz right there. - I think our hearts are in the right place. - I think our hearts are in the right place. We can make this work.

We care about consent. How about that? - Yeah, exactly. - Yeah, we were ahead of our time, thank you. - So I go in for, as Chris would call, the snog, all right? Our lips touch. And then I'm like,

"What's the technique? "How does one do this?" - How did the French do it? - When does one initiate the tongue, right? What is, what is, what is, you know what I mean? I don't know the shit. The only thing I know about kissing is from Hollywood, right? So I'm like,

So I must've felt like a fucking snake, a fucking lizard. 'Cause like, I'm just like a lizard. - Here it goes. - You know how snakes, like they taste the air? - Oh no. - So I was just like, oh no. Like that, and she's like, and she's like,

we're gonna work on that. And I'm like, I've blown it. I've fucking blown it. - This is the other worst thing is when we were in high school, you would hear the, they'd be like, so-and-so is an amazing kisser. And I think, wait, there's like a tier list? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Yeah. - Like there's a right way and a wrong way. - How do you become the ST? - Yeah, what do I do? - What is good kissing technique? - Yeah, and so I think for a lot of us, we just disqualified ourselves from Giga Chat of the Year anyway. So that's it, we don't know. - That was so burned into my memory that I was just like, after that, I was just like, I literally like went on the internet and be like,

- How do you kiss well? - Practice with a pillow, these techniques are- - Ironically, that night I was like, I gotta get some practice. I went for like the back of the hand. I was like, I can't let this happen again, man. - I think I was- - It's true. - I think I was like 14. And so I went to like a Welsh school which is kind of like out of the way. But my best friend, he went to a concert and met this girl.

- At 14 he was going to concerts and doing cool shit? - I think he was 14, 15, I'm trying to remember now. And he was like, "Yeah dude, she's totally chill. She lives right next to you." I was like, "Oh, cool man. Yeah, you should talk to her." And then I was talking to her and I was like, "Yeah, I'm gonna go meet up with her." And he was like, "Dude, what the fuck?" I was like, "What?" He's like, "Dude, I'm trying to get with her." I was like, "Oh, oh shit, my bad. Well, I'm just gonna go hang out. I'm sure it's nothing."

And then, you know, we're just chatting for like two hours and she's like, "Hey, let's kiss." I was like, "Yeah." She just came out with it. - Damn. - She was like a year or two older than me. And so I was like, "Yeah, okay, sure, all right." So she starts like, you know, kissing and I'm just like, probably like a monolith. She's like, you know, snogging is the only word I suppose that is suitable. And I'm just trying to like, I'm like trying to copy the movements that I'm feeling. And so I'm like,

I'm like, yeah, cover all the taste buds. Just lick all of the mouth. - Cover all 9,000 taste buds. - 'Cause I'm like, what do you do? I'm like, yeah, I'll just cover the entire mouth area. That'll feel good. - You did like a wiggle at one point. - Yeah, I was like, I don't know. And I'm like, oh, okay. And then, you know, and then like, you know, you know when you've had like the worst kiss of your life and you pull away and then you're like.

- I remember being like my entire mouth, like I had like baby food. Just slobber all over like here. - You know what's bad when it like goes above the floor. - She was like, "Yeah, that was good." And I was like, "Yeah, that was so good."

And then the next couple of times I met up with her, she was like, "Yeah, I like you a lot, but my ex Johnny, he's just, he keeps messaging me." I was like, "Oh, okay, cool." - Let's make out again. - Yeah, I was like, "Let's just keep making out. Why are we talking about Johnny?" And then like three days later, she's like, "Yeah, I'm leaving you for Johnny." 'Cause Johnny was like 18 and I was like, "I can't compete with Johnny." - Yeah.

I think all of our stories have explained an awful lot about our careers. About our personalities. We may not be Rizzlers or whatever the term is, but I think everybody, no matter who you are, has those same stories. I just imagine you, when you had this thing and you pushed her away, you just mocked her. You were like, kiss you. She was naked. I was like...

I said, honk, shoo, me, me, me, me, me. I was like, stop talking. I was like, I see. That's the thing is I didn't even have to talk. I just had to turn my back to her and it was like an anime. And she was like, I can't, this guy's too much. Yeah.

- Oh my God. - Just the shoes. - There's memories that I'm at that point now, I'm like, whatever, those embarrassing moments make you. - Yeah, if you can't laugh at it, what's the point? - Yeah, what's the point of living? - Yeah, exactly. - And like you said- - You learned what not to do. - Exactly. - At the time it felt like your world was crumbling apart. - Yeah, it's like, I'm going to die now. - That's another thing that, you know, I have noticed that as I've gotten older, there were moments like this or other things that were really actually genuinely impactful in my life. But as I've gotten into my forties, I think, was that,

when I was 23 or 26. - I have no recollection. - It's like you get to a point where those that do not diminish the importance of them, but remembering the details can be very, very hard. And then as you were telling me your story about these peers and these things, I had a bunch of new memories come back that I haven't thought of in a decade or two decades, but they were life or death when they happened or transpired. - Oh yeah.

Yep. That was a fun one. Wow. That was fun. Yeah. I think that's... So I have one more thing for Connor. Oh, shit. Just close your eyes. Here we go. For me? No, this is from... You don't have to close your eyes. You can open them. When I... Last year, we met at TwitchCon in EU. Yeah. And I held an event for our community. And instead of... They showered you with gifts. So I have one. No, they didn't. No, wait. I have one for you here.

- Wait, what? Oh, one of them was actually so cool. - It's this one. And I think that- - Dude, this was so sick. - I think it'd be perfect for your background. Either at home or here. - Yeah, I'm kinda- - What is it? - I'm kinda- - We'll see in a moment. - Kinda selfish. I wanna definitely take this one home. - Yeah, I just didn't want it in my house anymore. - Yeah. - Okay. 'Cause I couldn't take it 'cause I was going to America right after. - So you made me carry it. - So I made him go, 'cause he was going home and I was like, you know what?

- Oh, okay. - Drop. - No, I won't, I won't, I won't. Well, I gotta take off the padding now. Hold on, it's a little anticlimactic. - It's not. - It's cooler than that. It's cooler than that. - It's super sick. But this really cool username, Flood2Flood made, they also made me one, but mine did get damaged in the way home. But I'll let you guys see this one first. - Yeah, look at that. - Oh, cool. - Look at that. - Isn't that sick? - That's sick. - That's fucking awesome. - Hell yeah.

- It's really well done. - Dude, the detail on the shoe. - Oh my God. - Are those the Vessies? - They're not Vessies. - I think they look like cycling shoes. - Yeah, they're probably cycling shoes. Dude, the attention to detail on the t-shirt as well. - That's amazing. - How do you do that? I gotta give this a clean.

So the one that I got was also like the full van. But it got, and I was like standing next to it, like chilling and doing the same thing. But when I got home and unwrapped it, it had been not as carefully and lovingly packed, but my character had been flipped off the diorama and his head's upside down being hit by the car.

And I thought about opening up and fixing it, but Ian was like, um, no, that's how I always thought of those streams. So please keep it. So on the background of, of that, it has a me being hit by Ian. So it's a, it's a really fun. Thank you for bringing it. Yeah, there you go. So that's so cute. These guys continue to inspire my purple bike, dude.

- There you have it. - Well, that was super fun. - Thank you very much Pete for coming on. - Shout out to the native, thank you so much. Who was the user native? - Flood2Flood. - Flood2Flood, thank you so much. I absolutely love this. Thank you so much.

And thank you for coming on once again. - Reminding us of our core memories that we tried very, very hard to forget. - I really do want to forget. - Very kind. Thank you for letting me be here. - But if you want to see more of Pete, you can- - Go check him out. - Live all the time. - Twitch.tv/premier2. - Or we are also going to be playing some games just after this. This is going to be our coping mechanism for everything we just talked about. - I think I'm gonna need some of these for coping as well. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll crack another one.

- So Pete's gonna join us on our Patreon for some games and a little bit more content. If you wanna go to our Patreon, patreon.com/trashtaste. - Yeah. - To see more Pete and a lot more content. - Joey do the thing. - All right, hey, if you wanna support the show, head on over to patreon.com/trashtaste. Also follow us on Twitter, send us your memes on the subreddit. And if you hate our face, listen to us on Spotify. And of course go check out Pete. Wait, we don't need to tell you that. You guys are gonna go do that.

- Yeah. - But yeah, thanks for coming on, Pete. - It was actually a pleasure. You guys are great listeners. Thank you for guiding that. - I mean, you do our job for us with these episodes. - You make it too easy. - Yes. - Well, thank you so much. - See you guys next week. - Bye.