Hello folks, welcome to Nate land Welcome everybody. I'm my voice is still waking up
This is an early one. Yeah. I don't want to tell people what time it is. Because it's not that early, really. It feels very early. It feels early. I mean, people are going to be like, God, these guys got after it in the morning. And, I mean, it is 11.15. It's later than your Innsworth set. Yeah. It's definitely early for me. Not early. I get up and...
I got to just go. I got to go to bed early. I think I went to bed at 1230 last night. I had a long weekend or a long week because I was in I was at Phoenix Stand Up Live and we did six shows and I golfed every day. One being this hat, Silver Leaf. But we played every day, every morning. Yeah. And so and nothing was like early, but it was like nine. You know, we had to leave at like nine or eight thirty in the morning.
And then, I mean, and so then I was like pretty beat. And I got back last night and then woke up today at like 1030, right before y'all got here. Shows went well, though? Shows were great. It was fun. It was, yeah, everybody was nice. I had a lot of people I had to see a lot of. I got a couple friends, Amanda and Tracy, they've been coming to shows for a long time. I saw them.
They've been coming, you know, cause you always have some people come that come before any of this, you know, before now, before people were coming to shows. Uh, but they did, uh, yeah, shows are sold out. Nick or Mick was with me. Uh, so we did to get, we had a very funny, uh, Jill Kimmel was the host, uh, Jimmy Kimmel's sister. Yeah. She's very, very funny comedian. And so we all got to hang out and, uh,
You know, they had to do... So it's a big room. And it was like 300 people, but that's half. And because in Arizona, they opened up where you could... It could be...
you know like they're saying like it's full capacity but you still have to be six feet apart so you can't really still be full capacity yeah yeah i also saw in phoenix it was a van that uh had a uh massage massage thing on the side of the van i mean side of the road like a mobile massage oh like you pulled over yeah and then there would be a massage that might be not a legal one
I'm not imagining Special massage It's like the people that sell purses on the side of the road in New York I mean, side of the sidewalk Yeah, it was like you could pull over and just get a massage I don't know who We should have went in it Do you ever, when you're playing charity golf tournaments, scrambles Have you ever had one where they have a masseuse out there? Yeah Do you do it? Yeah, I've done it Yeah I've done it like once Like you just sit there and it's like five minutes Yeah Just out there on the course? Yeah, on a hole
And so they're just having, yeah, like a girl about there and she just give a quick massage and you kind of get, you got to do it. You got to be like, all right, it's all part. That's what part of it. Have you done one? Yeah, I did it. And I was, I mean, I was hitting balls. I was so tense and frustrated. And then I sit down and she, and it relaxes me. And I was like, oh my God, I feel so much better. And then I tee off and just almost hit her with the ball. Yeah.
Too loose. Too loose. And then I'm just tense again. Yeah. Like I haven't even left her. I'm already tense. Yeah. Can we do it again? You should hit, maybe you should hit first, then do it. Yeah. You know, just to, cause you, you're, you want to be able to walk with the full tense tension that you're bringing to the table. When you go to that table, you got to have a full tension. Okay.
And then you got to do it. Yeah. Yeah, it was a fun. It's hot out there. It's very weird to be. We were playing golf. It's like back to summer. It feels like summer here. 85 degrees. I think I got sun poised in one day. I don't know if that's true. But it was. Are you breathing? Is there breathing into this microphone? I'm hearing it. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Do you hear it? Yeah. Do you still hear it?
I've been hearing it the whole episode. I took my headphones off because it was making me laugh. Yeah. Is it? I don't want to single anybody out. I don't want to single anybody out. So is it me? Yes. That's all right. Somehow. That's all right. I think people get used to it. It's like background music.
All right. He says like background music. Yeah. You just get used to it. I think people get used to it. Yeah. I think they like it. You know, they go, oh, wow, this is nice. Someone goes, is there something wrong? People driving their cars, looking around, like thinking something's wrong with their... Is he in a tire? Yeah. Is it flat? Am I getting a flat? You just... Someone hearing that noise just pulled into a discount tire. I don't know. I'm hearing like a little, like something.
You know, and then the guy's like, I don't know, I think I hear it. Now we hear it. All right. Yeah, this one's going to be... This one is not even probably going to get out. We're going to have to shut down the whole podcast. All right, as usual, we're going to start hearing from you guys. So first up, Jesse Jean. Hey, is that...
Jesse Jean. I don't know. It just made me laugh. Oh, okay. I was like, that's, I mean, it's pretty basic. Hey, y'all. Love the podcast. And you guys are the only show I listen to religiously. My favorite part is y'all name each show based on the topics. But then the episode gets hijacked by Nate going off on a tangent about something unrelated, like Bojangles pronunciations of the word mature.
And then the last 10 minutes of each episode is scrambling to wrap up the actual topic. Can't get enough of this podcast. Great work. Yep. Well, I guess if we don't talk about.
Well, I mean, you had to talk about mature. Everybody that saw that clip, like on Instagram, they said that they were like, you know, cause we didn't, we didn't bring it up. It wasn't immediate. Right. It was like, you said it. And then there was a couple seconds. Yeah. And so everybody, you know, was thinking that. Right. Yeah. What do you mean?
Like, are we going to say something about, like, if we had just posted that and never addressed that you said mature. Yeah. But that wasn't true. How do you, I think I say, you say versatile? Versatile. I probably, but versatile, I think so. I know it's in your Biori ads. Yeah. Versatility. I say versatile, but. Versatile. Comfortable and versatile clothing. Is that right? I think they're both right. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, I think it's a versatile word. It's a word that can be used many different ways. That's the point of that word. Yeah. That is actually a pretty good word. They came up with a word that you can say it a different way. Yeah. And you're like, what does it mean? It means that. It means exactly that. It means exactly that. Wow. Yeah, it's deep. Eric Wooten.
There's actually a way to get the stat. There is actually a way to get the stat on how many kids learned an instrument because of Guitar Hero. If Aaron took real classes, he would have been able to answer Nate when he asked how they got that stat. The chances I can teach you all in this comment is slim, but I will say basically they can do surveys and ask kids why they learned an instrument and extrapolate from there.
There's a whole mathematical method to it that is pretty accurate. They taught that in my stats class in college. I missed out on the friendship class, but I did learn the math behind how they derive stats. Okay. So that's how they do it. Yeah. Well, this is a horrible explanation from Eric. He goes, I don't want to get into it, but they ask kids questions and then they just kind of go from there. It's like, yeah, of course they do. Yeah. Yeah.
I did a little research on the 20% of kids in the UK. Yeah, we got... Maybe it's not you. Do you hear like a... It's breathing. Okay. Pull the mic away. All right. I thought last time you said get closer. I mean, you know, it's a moving problem. I think. Yeah. It's a versatile problem. It's a versatile problem. I mean, if you end up still in this room by the time this podcast is over, it'll be... There's a chance we're going to have you...
Just stay on the ladder behind that window. And you're just going to have to hold on. We got the ladders out there, I'll tell you that. Well, can I read this? What? Yeah. So I did a research on... I'm so insecure now about even breathing. I know you should be. Go ahead.
I did research about Guitar Hero and 20% of kids in the UK. Yeah. I found a little bit. It was a study done by a group organization called Youth Music, which I admit sounds made up. But they found that 2.5 million out of 12 million kids in the UK learned to play instruments after doing Guitar Hero. So that's the group. And you said it was all made up. I just want to share. That's what I found so far. Yeah.
That's a lot of kids. Yeah, it's a lot of kids. 20%, apparently. It's impressive. Yeah, you know, stats, man. I took a stats class, too. I don't want you to just think I just took friendship classes. I'll tell you what, yeah, I don't know if you have comments about it. People did not like my take on college. Did you have any comments about that or no? There's a few comments in here, yeah. We'll get to them today.
If they didn't, I'll just, yeah, I mean, I got some direct messages. Not thrilled. Brandon Alberta. Alberta. I took a class called Creativity and Culture and had to read a book that the professor wrote called Rhyming with Orange. He's just pointing out another crazy class that he had taken college. In a book called Rhyming with Orange. I'm guessing his professor, well, it says he wrote that book.
You can write some books, man. Nothing rhymes with orange, though. Isn't that the point? You ever seen that interview with Eminem? Aren't you glad I didn't say orange? Yeah. Well, that's the same. They ask Eminem in, I think it was 60 Minutes, they say, can you rhyme something with orange? And he goes, I put my orange four-inch door hinge in storage and ate porridge with George. Oh, wow. That's pretty impressive. Just off the top, he just said that.
And they're like, and you're insane. Yeah. Well, he just kind of goes along. I don't think that rhymes with orange. Well, he say you take orange and you split it up into two. So orange. Yeah. You just say it a little bit differently. And then that opens up a lot of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
say banana and stuff really comes together you know that's basically that logic well what i do is i just say apple and then i go snapple and plapple and papple and you're like oh so just yeah yeah i don't and you're like but does it rhyme with orange though can you do orange because yeah i can do orange i just change it to red and then i do bread and spread and you're like you're not answering the question m&m
Marshall. Jim Freeman. The best class I took was the meat we eat. Learning about the different cuts of beef and pork. I was an architecture major. Yeah, I mean, people were getting mad about this college thing. I mean, come on. More and more. Zoso Dubs. Zusu. Zoso Dubs. There could be a whole television show tracking Nate's journey through college. I'd watch it on repeat.
I thought about trying to pitch something about just going back to school and learning stuff. I'd love to take some of those classes. Tom Stanton. I'm a high school teacher in Albany, New York. I'm the English department chair and teach an AP lit course. I want to invite you to teach a lesson on any topic you want.
My head of school is a huge fan of yours and would help my career if I were the teacher who got you to be a guest lecturer. My only suggestion is that Aaron and Beefburger co-teach with you. Love the show, especially when you sit there discussing asinine facts about states that a fifth grader would think is too dumb to put into an essay. Those are the stats I like. What would you talk about in your AP Lit class?
I mean, if I had to do, like, a serious one, I mean, I would just talk... I mean, I would talk about comedy and, like, you know... I could talk about comedy all day long. Yeah. And just, like, the art of... I don't know, like...
Speaking, saying words, you know? I don't know. Yeah. Well, you could do any topic you want. Well, that one would be serious. The hard part that you go there, yeah. Or it could be fun to go with teaching clue. Like, here's the stuff I don't think you need to learn at college. You could be an adjunct teacher. Not even an adjunct professor. Yeah, just an adjunct teacher. That's less. I'm a little less. Yeah. Yeah. I'm an adjunct substitute teacher. I don't even get to do...
You get like 40 bucks at the end of the day. They just give you some cash and then you're for the, for gas. They pay for your gas. Nathan Hearn. I'm a student at Virginia tech and I can confirm that inner Sandman is the most exhilarating experience I have ever had. We have registered on the seismograph three times. That is the most out of any other college stadium.
Yeah, I mean, I think that's what it is. I'm definitely going to go to a Virginia Tech game. I want to see that. I mean, that's such a cool thing. A night game. Yeah. That's where you should enroll. In Virginia Tech? I don't think I can get in. I mean, you've got to have great – can you just go?
You can just show up and sit in classes. Audit a class. Oh, yeah? Yeah. And you don't have to be at the school for that? No. You can go to any college at any time and just sit in the class if you want.
Could you do that over and just get college that way? You could, but you wouldn't get a diploma. You wouldn't get a degree. But you get to say, I've just been going to classes. Yeah. Yeah. I guess so. If I don't care about the paper. Yeah, right. If you just want to learn what they're teaching. Like an adjunct student. And then go in and... Be an adjunct student. Yeah. Yeah. Gregory Padula.
Nate talked about the song Freshman coming out while he was in high school. They proceeded to say that song reminded him of his friends every time he hears it. I wonder if he knows that song is about a high school student committing suicide. No, absolutely not. I listened to it and actually pretty happy when I listened to it.
I have no idea. Well, we learned that about Nate. He doesn't listen to the lyrics of songs. I can even have the words memorized, but they're not, they're not landing. You're not, there's no comprehension. Yeah. I don't listen to it as a story. You're like, don't fear the Reaper and freshman, both about suicides to your favorite songs. Two of the songs that I played with my daughter was born. Uh, there. Just set the mood.
And the doctor has to turn it off. Did you do the thing, you know, some pregnant mothers will play music into their stomach? You just pump it in verve pipe? Yeah. The whole freshman over and over again. It's not loop. Now I'm listening to Driver's License by Olivia something, whatever Olivia, it's the number one song. Rodriguez? Yeah. It's a fun one.
And that's probably sad. It is a sad song, yeah. Yeah. But it's not about somebody killing themselves. No, no. Could be, though. We haven't heard the next song she's going to come out with. Well, what happens to that girl? Matt Parrish. My parents got my sister and me a Nintendo for Christmas with Mario Brothers and Tetris. And after making us go to bed early on Christmas night, my mom stayed up until about 3 a.m. and beat Mario Brothers.
She was waiting on us to wake up the next morning to tell us she beat it. I'll never forget being mad that my mom beat my game before I could. We were homeschooled in elementary, and she would make us do her schoolwork while she played Dr. Mario. To this day, my mom was always my least favorite teacher because of that. She was the only teacher, probably, right? Homeschool. That's pretty crazy. She just stayed up and beat it. Yeah. You know? I mean, I feel like it took a lot longer.
Your mom played. That's pretty crazy. Danny Sanchez. The original PlayStation is gray. They released a different model named PS1 that was white. Thank you. Thank you, Danny. A lot of people called you out, Aaron. I want to be clear. I wasn't saying that the color of the PlayStation was white, but if you put...
the PlayStation, the original PlayStation and the PlayStation 2, which is black, and you said, grab the white one, you would be insane not to grab the one that's gray. That's all I was trying to say. That doesn't even make sense.
So they just had the gray one and the black one, and someone said grab the white one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I'm trying to differentiate between the two, and I just go, oh, there's a white one and a black one. I would think you don't know the word gray in your vocabulary. That's what I would assume is that, oh, this guy hasn't heard about gray. Right.
And then I would probably talk to you about gray. I said, yeah, that's a good compromise between gray and white. And then somebody's like, yeah, that's called this light gray. That's what that's called. I get it. I'm just backtracking a little bit. Trying to stay in your ground. Yeah. Yeah. That's the key. Hazel. Hey, Nate, did you know your new special comes out the same day as the new Justice League movie?
Figured I'd break it to you. I know what I'm watching, but I'll still probably check your thing out the day after or something. Yeah, it was not like they told me, hey, by the way. It was supposed to come out on the 16th, and then they moved it to the 18th. So it was almost like we were trying to move it to the Justice League thing. Is Justice League coming out on Netflix? HBO Max. Oh.
It accidentally leaked yesterday for a short time. Well, go watch it. Yeah. Go download the leak. How long is it? Watch it early. Four hours. Wait, so they've already come out with it. You're going to see the same movie, just extra stuff? Supposedly, it's very different. This is the Zack Snyder version, and he was the original director, and then he got...
removed from it and then someone else did it why did he get removed i think creative differences or something so now this is his version his version so they're they're giving you so all he did was like recut it they didn't act it i mean if it's four hours there's obviously a ton in it that wasn't in the original yeah but i mean there's did they act again like do they no i don't think so i think he's just taking the everything they shot and redoing it that's pretty crazy
So everybody's going to go pay for a movie that's already been done, and they're just like, well, we just got a guy that redid it. Like, did no one like the first Justice League? It was okay. I mean, I don't think people loved it. I like the idea of doing that, but you're releasing extra stuff, so you're just like, all right, we're going to... And I guess it's cool to see. I'm not trying to... I know people go nuts about this kind of stuff, but...
I mean, I'm just letting you know that. Look at that. What extra work are they doing? This is the, that's the old one. That's the old one, 2017. So it wasn't good. 40% on Rotten Tomatoes. Yeah. And then, so now they're just like, all right, well, the same stuff. We're just going to redo it. I guess it'll be interesting to see how much they change. Yeah. Like that's kind of fun. Brian and I are going to do a recut of your Netflix special and release that.
And that's kind of what this... So that's what's happening, though. And now there's going to be more storylines than a stand-up special. But that's exactly... That would be like if I, in a year ago, got a new special, guys. Yeah. And I just got a director to redo it. Yeah. Didn't Chris Rock just do that? He released Extra. Yeah. Because they recorded more. And so then, if there's new stuff... But yes. But I mean, he just put it back on Netflix. So it's not like you're, you know...
I don't know. Seems kind of like, I feel like there's going to be more of that where it's going to be like, wow, we don't want to do the, you know, we can't go shoot it again, but we're, I think those actors get paid again, you know? Yeah. I don't know. There's a lot of details about, I don't know, but I guess yesterday when people try to watch Tom and Jerry on HBO max, you could see justice league. Oh yeah. And then I think they finally figured it out and stopped it, but they accidentally had it.
Where you could watch it. Geared up and ready to go. Yeah. Yeah, that is pretty crazy. So the college stuff is... Well, here, let's... We're going reads because I think we read some of these ads. So I was getting... Yeah, I got... People got mad about the college thing. Like, I guess a trash college. Yeah.
Typical college people can't handle it. No. I'm not, I was never saying I'm against college. Yeah. Go to college. All right. I don't, I think it's, I mean, I don't think I'm insane to bring up friendship as being a class, as being kind of wild. Right. If you listen to the actual podcast and heard the context, you were clearly only trashing
like some of these classes with ridiculous names that are kind of silly. But I think I also remember you being like, if you're a doctor or a lawyer, obviously you need to go to college. Obviously. Well, I mean, but then everybody marketing majors, I get like, you know, yes, it's good. It's not bad. It's good to go to college.
People that go to college, it works out for them. Statistically, with stats, they seem to do better. And so I'm not against going to college. But you're also against stats, so who knows how you feel. I don't know where they're coming from. But I didn't go to college. I didn't take a stats class. Stats class actually makes sense to me. Here's how we get stats. I get the idea. I'm not against college at all.
I think it's, you know, but if you don't, if you, if you think I'm, if you don't want me to be mad about college and think don't trash college, don't trash people that didn't go to college then. Cause that's what college people tend to do. You go, I'm, I'm better than you. Right. Yeah. I went to college. Are you trashing people?
No, but I'm just, I think it's, but they think they, but people that went to college, I went to college. You did not. They would say that if you, if they try to argue me, I went to college, you did not go to college. Yeah. So you can't have it both. And then like, you're the higher educated one. You're the one that's better than everybody. Just let me in the minions complain at the bottom. I don't know if I'm making it worse or better. Uh,
I mean, I really got a few messages. It was the only thing, you know, no one ever really says anything. Look, I went to college. I'm not offended by it at all. I think it's dumb to be offended by that. It's like you went to college. You'll be all right. Yeah. You know? Yeah. That's what you do. You're better than this guy. Right. You want to talk to him for a second? Aaron Land? Yeah.
He's got a co-host on Aaron Land. And they're special Aaron Land to go, let him. Who cares? He's a dumb idiot that couldn't get into college. Let him make fun of. I'm the, you know, the court jester that make fun of the king. Y'all are the king. Yeah. You're running everything. Y'all just give each other jobs. You went there, I'll give you a job.
You know, it's all against it. All right. I'm joking. I get make it worse. I think it's great. Go to college, go to college guys. I, you know, my daughter, I'd like her to go to college. Supposed to, I think college is going to take a change though. I'll be interested to see by the time she gets to college, I bet college drops. I think people are, there's other, I think, cause I think just real life experience will come into play. If you want to do something,
Then maybe, you know, maybe it is you go somewhere for a couple of years, but then actually just go do the job that you want to go do. If you want to get into marketing, go work at an intern and get into marketing, get into it that way. I bet that happens. Well, hopefully fewer and fewer businesses will do this thing where they're like,
Look, we won't even talk to you unless you have a bachelor's degree or whatever. Yeah. There's so much of that now. Yeah. Where they're like, even to get your foot in the door, you have to have this. Hopefully that goes away a little bit and you just get the best people. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I don't know what job I would, I could, I wouldn't have had a job that could have, many would have never let me work there because I didn't, because I didn't go and I didn't have anything. And if I would have went anywhere and just said, I got this,
I get the idea. They want you to, I feel like they want you to be like you committed to something and you went through it and you did it and you're done and you got this. Yeah. The poor one. Yeah. But that's, and that shows a lot. And then if you're into marketing and all this stuff, you know, but I think if you don't go to college, like, so someone wants to be in the marketing, I don't know what the difference is. If a person goes to college or if a person just went, like say right out of high school, you want to be in marketing.
You just go intern in a company that does it. And in four years, you have more experience than the guy that went to college. Yeah, the problem is a lot of people, you can't get internships usually unless you're getting college credit for it. Yeah. So it's a catch-22. Because I agree, internships are where you really get practical experience. But they're not going to let us do it. Probably not, unless you're earning college credit. Yeah, so why y'all can't get mad at me for making fun of college? You literally won't let me do something. Yeah.
I can't go anywhere. All right. You think I wanted to do this? I wanted to get into college, but I was too dumb. You got in. Vol State, anybody that's community college, you might get in. Western Kentucky? One semester and did, I forget how, yeah, I don't know how I got in there because I took those remedial classes. So I went and did like an extra year of high school at a community college. And then that was enough to then come in
I mean, I would have probably not graduated. It would have taken me five years to graduate. Oh, at least. Oh, yeah. I'd have been a Western for five years. Yeah, probably. Because when I went, my second year was basically my first year. Didn't you take a bowling class? Yeah, I failed it. How'd you fail it? I just didn't go. Yeah, that'll do it. Well, they want to make you keep score, too. You had to learn that, which is...
No one does that. Yeah, why would you ever need to do that now? I remember, kind of remember how to do it. I mean, what else are they going to teach? Yeah. That ruins half the guy's lesson plan. If you go, well, we'll just do computers. And he's like, I mean, he's not just teaching you how to
spin a ball. Like that's, you know, I mean, that was a, that was kind of a goofy class, but I guess I thought it was, you know, athletics. I don't remember any other classes. That's what I took a spin class in college. That was the worst. What is that? Like the indoor cycling. Yeah. We had to take three PE classes. I took CPR was one of my PE classes and,
I took team handball and I took spin, spin class. And I showed up late and the only available bike was like right in front of the dude. Yeah. He was like this guy that ran Ironmans and stuff. And he was like, I'm going to get you or you need to be. I was like, dude, I just want to be in the back. I don't care about this at all. And it stunk, dude. Man.
Maybe you think he's watching this today and he just... He's probably running somewhere. I know, but he's listening. Maybe he's imagining that you're in great shape now. He's like, I got that. Well, he knows about your gout if he's listening. Your Planet Fitness. He never would have had a gout if he just stayed with me. Did you finish the class? I did, yeah. I did all of it. So it was basically an aerobics class. Yeah, that's what it is. Was he the only guy in there? No, there were other guys in there.
I honestly, I didn't know what spin class meant. Are they taking, giving you classes that are like, here's how the real world works. Like eventually you're going to go to a gym and pay for a spin class.
Bet you'll never attend. I don't think that was the intention of it. It was a PE class. Yeah, it was a PE class. You know, at Notre Dame, this has been grandfathered in. You have to take a swim class when you're a freshman. A swim test. Yeah. Your first week of freshman year. And if you fail the swim test, you have to take swim as one of your PE classes. Oh, wow. And I passed the swim test. That's how easy it was. Yeah.
So I don't know. I don't know why I have to take PE. What do you have to do? You swim back and forth? You literally just get in a pool and swim there and back, and then you do backstroke there and back. And they just like see if you, they just like look at you and see, can this guy swim? They make sure you're not going to drown on campus. Right. Yeah. Is there a lot of that happening? I bet so. I mean, I bet that's the general idea of it. Like they just want to be like, hey dude, if you fall into water, are you going to be all right?
I don't know why they make you do it. I think it's, I think it's, we thought about doing it with Harper when she was a baby, same class. You just throw them in. Did they just throw you in?
No, I just stepped into the pool. I didn't have to throw me in. Did you not know you were having to do this? And then they go, let's show you the pool area. They pushed you. This is a nice area. Then someone just shoved you in the pool. Trust me, I knew about it because I was dreading it for weeks because I didn't want to be the only guy I knew that failed the swim test. Did you wear a shirt? Yeah. No, I didn't wear a shirt. Huh? I didn't wear a shirt. You didn't? No. You had to walk out there. Yeah.
Long, you got board, what are you wearing? What kind of swim trunks? Did you have- Did you say board shorts? Board shorts. Did you have just regular swim trunks? They were actual swim trunks? It might have been like basketball shorts, honestly. I'd never went back to that pool, believe it or not. Yeah. And then you had to just go back and forth. Right. So because I passed the swim test, I was able to take-
And you didn't think that through when you did it? Spin? I didn't really know what spin meant. I thought it meant like a... It meant spinning until you get dizzy? Like the thing you put your forehead on a bat and you spin and you got to run around the bases. Dizzy bat race. And they were going to make you know... No, I thought spin like a dance or something. Yeah. Like tap. Yeah, that's how they get you. They don't call it bicycle. If they called it a bicycle riding class, you would have... I would have been out. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Spin sounds like it's kind of fun. Yeah. And it was not. Did you throw that bike in a tree? What's that? Did you throw that spin bike up in a tree? Yeah. Isn't that y'all's thing? Yeah. I remember I used to sweat so bad and I would never have time to take a shower because I had a class across campus. And it would be so cold just during the winter that I would walk to my next class and all the sweat would freeze on me. And it would be disgusting. Yeah. And that was a real, yeah, I didn't like that time.
He has a dark time. Yeah. Would you, would you have traded having gout at that time for that situation? If they, someone came up and said, I'll fix this, but I got to give you gout. Oh, I'd take it for sure. Any day. I would love it. Yeah. Yeah. That's a, if I have gout now, which I don't think I do, it's pretty easy.
Yeah, we don't know right you still don't know I still don't know Planet Fitness any updates on that I forget I always forget about always forget I don't have a printer Can I print it out here? Yeah your place? Yeah, and then I'll mail it. Yeah, then we'll go from there Yeah, when get it printed out. Mm-hmm You need a printer, you know printer not on a printer. No. Yeah, I don't think I printed anything probably six or seven years Yeah, I like paper. So this week I
So this week we figured, this is a big week. I got a lot of stuff going on this week. A lot of interviews, a lot of stuff like that. Fun stuff. So we looked up, what did we talk about this week? The Old West. The Old West. The Wild Wild West. Is it Wild Wild West or Old West? Wild West or Old West. Wild Wild West. That was a Will Smith movie. Yeah.
But you could add extra wild, I guess. Yeah, Wild West. We used to do the whole podcast about the movie. The movie with Will Smith. Just going to break it down. I remember watching the movie. It's a pretty good movie. I remember the song that came with the movie. That was a hit. Yeah, it was a big summer song. Yeah, it was a good movie.
We can start with that. Yeah. You have stuff about the movie? No, but we've all seen it, so we can talk about it. I don't remember. Wasn't there a robot involved? Yeah, at the end. Yeah. There was a robot involved. Yeah. Yeah. There's always some robots. All right. All right. Maybe they're going to re-release it.
The director's cut. That has to be a way that they're doing stuff. I mean, I get this guy's recutting this movie, so it could be completely different. So I get the idea of it. And it's free on HBO Max if you have HBO Max. Is that movie theaters too? I don't think so.
So if they're doing it like that, then I don't, you know, but it's like the idea of this just re, you know, what if they start doing that? Like they couldn't release movies. All right, well, we cut this movie and we're going to send it out. You know, they did it with The Office. They just put The Office on a, it's on Peacock now, NBC's new streaming thing. And they just, all the deleted scenes are on there now. So it's kind of like a new. Really? Yeah. New thing. You can go check it out, but it's the same show, but just deleted scenes are added in. Yeah. Yeah.
Same thing. My wife had never seen Seinfeld, so we were watching it from start to finish and watching the DVDs. So we'll watch deleted scenes that I've never seen. And there's stuff in there that makes sense. You don't think about it until you see the deleted scene. You're like, oh, yeah, that kind of moved the story along. And they, besides, he took, Kramer takes cold showers, so he wouldn't sweat.
But that was like when you're walking across Notre Dame in the cold because you couldn't cool yourself down. Take a cold shower. Take a cold shower and then, oh, interesting. Take a cold shower and then you won't sweat. It's because you work out, then go take a hot shower, and then you just keep sweating. Because George would be sweating. George had one that didn't take. He didn't have one that, yeah, his didn't take because his showers never take. And so you just take a cold shower right after you work out, and then that keeps you. And I've done that for that advice because of Seinfeld.
And it works. Yeah. I don't go as cold. I remember I had to take a cold shower. And when we went to Iraq, they didn't have, where was that at? But we had to take a shower in the morning. And I remember it was, they go, there's no hot water. And I mean, it was, wait, was that Iraq? I just remember there being no hot water. And it was like, this is a nightmare, dude. And it was like, you just, I mean, I just as very, never really stood under it.
But just kind of like did it. I mean, it was so cold. It was in the morning too. And you're like, this is the worst thing ever. That's it. Talking about waking you up. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So the old West, the wild West, um, it basically we're talking about the 1800s and really what we think of more like even the second half of the 1800s.
It kind of got going, the West kind of got settled once the Louisiana Purchase happened in 1803. Oh. So basically the U.S. They purchased Louisiana. Well, more than just Louisiana. It was called Louisiana Purchase, but it was the whole territory. It was actually 15, parts of 15 states, current states. It doubled the size of the United States when they bought it from France. Okay.
How much did it cost again? It was like super cheap. Yeah, it was $15 million, which sounds like a lot, but... For that much land. Louisiana purchases, all of that? Yeah. Yeah.
It goes from, I mean, it goes into Canada. Yeah, it does go into Canada. And so why do they call it just the Louisiana prison? Because that's where it started. The French, which owned the territory of Louisiana, they sold them all that. They didn't even have rights to all that. I mean, that was just Native American land, but Napoleon. So that was all. So at this time in 1803, if you go out and live in Louisiana, it was like you could be
You think, man, it gets cold in Louisiana, and you're like, you're at the Montana part. Yeah. A lot of that was just wilderness, right? Yeah, it was just open plains. There was hardly anybody there. I think, yeah, the whole area is the Louisiana Territory, and then soon they started breaking down to the Dakota Territory and different territories, but none of that was states. Everything east of that, the Mississippi, was part of the United States.
But then when they bought that land, it doubled in size. So now all those lands out west, people started going to settle in. But nobody obviously consulted the American Indians about it. I mean, you could just go... Yeah. They didn't talk to them and say, hey, we're buying all this land. No. That's where the tension comes from. A little bit of tension. Yeah. So if you... I don't know what I was going to say. But, I mean, Louisiana...
I mean, the France, France sold them this. They basically sold them the rights that no other European country is going to come and try to take it from you. Right. That's all they sold. Yeah. They're like, we won't come try to, it's your land. It's your, you know, you can have it. So that doubled the size of the United States. So everybody started moving out West to all those countries.
I mean, those future states, excuse me. And then the other big thing that moved everybody to go out west was the California gold rush. So in 1848, gold was discovered in Northern California. 800 people lived in California at that time. Well, it's more than that now. A little bit. Yeah. They had to wear masks. Yeah.
Was there a mask mandate at that time? It didn't say. Oh. I didn't look. But by the end of 1848, 20,000 people had moved there just because of the gold rush. And by 1849, it was up to 100,000. So that's why San Francisco 49ers. Yeah. Called the 49ers because 1849 was the big gold rush. Yeah. And this is all during the wild, wild west.
Yeah. Yeah. These small towns. Yeah. So now everybody's going out West. There's no laws. How many native Americans were there? Total? Yeah. Like, why did they just get like, I mean, was it no, just stopping it, I guess. I mean, they tried. Well, they're probably so spread out. Yeah. I mean, Europeans had better weapons and, uh,
Yeah. Yeah. That's current. I need to look it up. Currently, it's foreign-happening. I mean, look, there's bloodshed, and they were treated horribly. Yeah. It's like the shame of America's past. Yeah. But the gold rush sent everybody out to California. So now everybody's going out west. So then they've got to find a way to get there. So the Oregon Trail is a thing, which we covered last week in video games. That's a real thing. Started in Springfield, Missouri, right? I think Independence, Missouri. Oh.
Wow. That's the same thing. Yeah. Yeah. Start in Missouri and then it would take you all the way to the Oregon territory. So there was two ways to get to the West Coast at this time if you live on the East Coast. You take a boat, go all the way down to South America, underneath it, go back up to get to the West Coast. Did it say how long that would take? Six months. Six months. Or... Just on the high seas. Yeah. Yeah.
Would you stop like at, you know? The tip of South America? It would be like a cruise. We'd get off here. I don't know. I don't think it resembled a cruise in a lot of ways, man. I think it was brutal. You know, a little fishing boat. Just hitting waves. Just going like, it takes you forever.
Or they could walk or ride. Or they could do this, which also I think was about four to six months, the Oregon Trail. And, I mean, this was dangerous for its own reasons because of Native Americans, robbers and stuff like that.
Do you think at the end of this trip you get out and you're like, whoo! You're just stressed for six months. Yeah, you got a whole new crew of people there. Yeah. Does everybody go, oh, oh. And he goes, oh, God, that was a long one. Like, you think that's, you do the same reaction, but it's six months. Yeah. Just, you know, just your neck a little bit. God, my neck is killing me today. You know.
Well, there was a trail. Yeah, they had to blaze a trail. See, it goes to Portland, the Portland Trailblazers. Oh, look at that. Yeah. I'm trying to keep it sports references here to keep y'all interested. So there would be no San Francisco 49ers without the Portland Trailblazers. Oh, wow. So they owe it to them. Yeah. There'd be no Joe Montana without Clyde Drexler. Yeah. So there's a little trail that they had to make, but...
Sometimes things went bad. So the Donner Party, I don't know if you guys heard of them. Oh, geez. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They tried to... They were at their table last night when their name was called. Donner Party 4. And we all waited. Cartwright. Cartwright. The Donner Party was a group that went... They took their own trail. It was a new trail that they were told about that hadn't been tried yet. There's a lot of dads like that.
What do you mean? It's a very dead thing to go, now we're going this new way. That's just take. There's a trail that's already been done. He goes, there's a new way. Well, it didn't work out well. They almost made it, and they got the Sierra Nevada mountains and snow crapped them, and half of them died. Of the 90 people in the group, half of them died, and they were about to starve, and they resorted to cannibalism.
Wow. That took a turn. Yeah. Yeah. The Donner family. Maybe that's why they were late for their order. Yeah. And it wasn't just their family. I mean, Donner party at four. We're two now. Okay.
So yeah, that's what they're known for, cannibalism, that story. The Donners. Well, it wasn't just them. There's 90 people in the group. They're kind of a leaded group, but it'd be like if your family and Wayne and everybody just like, let's go out west. And it was mostly kids. And they went up on the mountain. It got snowed in. It got snowed in. They couldn't get out. A few people went to try to get help. Right. So that's how they even know this was going on.
But by the time they got out, half of them were dead and they resorted to eating each other. Not everybody. Brand new terrain. Yeah. It's a totally unfamiliar place. Yeah, I mean, is there a map?
I mean, probably somebody sold them some type of map for this new trail they took. I forgot what the pass was called, but it was, I think the guy that's named after, he'd never even done it. Yeah. He just said, I think. I'm pretty sure. I think he sold them on it, and it was supposed to make the trip quicker. I think it was supposed to shorten the trip. He just waited in line, and that guy's still selling those maps, and you get up there, and it's your turn, and you're like, hello. He goes, hey. Yeah, remember, I'm part of the Donner family. We bought a map here about a year ago.
I got a few complaints, I'd like to say. It's like, all right, dude, sorry. Did you guys go the wrong way? No, my uncle ate a lot of people. That's where your map took us, is that it led to. And he's like, all right, come over here. Let's talk over here. He can't be having people here. Everybody's hearing it. Everybody's hearing it. What's that? What'd he say? Because if you go this path, you're going to eat your own people.
And they're like, well, that's insane. You go, you think that? Yeah, dude, I thought it was insane too. This map will put you in a position where it's not insane. And you can wrap your head around it. And it's called the Sierra Mountains. It's going to snow. Can you imagine if there were Yelp reviews back then? Oh, just of that. The Donner family. Yeah. You think if the three of us were locked in a cabin like that?
like if our tour got stuck and we had to resort to eat each other. Yeah. I mean, how long would it take before you got there? I mean, before we did, before you were that, I don't know. You tell us, I think you're hit at first. What are you talking about? That was me. I'm joking. Yeah.
I don't think that's our question to answer. I mean, I think, you know. Obviously, you'd be hitting it first. Yeah, yeah. What do you think? I think me and Bates would have to get separated first. You think the two of you? I think we would talk heavily about you. And just being like, I always get, Bates, come over a little bit. Hey, what do you think? Darren, what do you think?
Let's keep an eye out. Let's keep an eye out. I know he won't eat a lot during the day, but he's going to hit. Something's going to happen. He's going to eat a midnight snack at some point. I think I could outlast the two of y'all.
You know what I mean? But if we killed you, we got enough to cover the whole winter. The Donner Party, they weren't killing each other, right? They were just dying of natural causes and then they just were eaten. Yeah. So that's what happened. Yeah, well, you hope so. I mean, you know, we didn't, you know, one knows what's going on. No, we don't know. You don't know. I mean, I'm sure like once you do it and then you're like, it wasn't bad and you got a taste for it, you know?
I mean, yeah, I don't. They may have progressed the process of dying. Yeah. Right. A little bit. That would be the worst if you ate it and it's just like your favorite food. And you're like, oh man. It'd be worse as you ate. I mean, you're just like eating it. Then you hear a hello. And someone's like, no, there's a, there's a little town over here. And you're just sitting there like, uh, okay. I'll be right there.
No, no, no. Don't come over here. I'll be right there. And you're just like, you open a door that you didn't have to open. You didn't look around. There's a town just 100 yards away. It's a golden arch, right? Hello, everybody. I got an airplane over here. He's like, invented an airplane. How long have we been up here, man? Yeah, I don't. I like to think, I mean, why didn't they hunt? I guess that they were trapped.
I think they did try some hunting, but it was just they were trapped in the snow. They just couldn't. I would hope that you could figure a way out to not eat, not to get to that point. Like you would just be like, I'll figure something else out. But I don't know. I mean, this is a different time, man. I mean, death was, that's the luxury that you have where we live here in America. I mean, really even in other countries that are,
Even not as, you know, what's the word? Like not as evolved. Affluent? Yeah, fortunate, but not as like evolved as we are now here. I think death is not as, it just gets less and less. I mean, back then it was like,
I mean, I think you had a lot of kids. It was more expected for sure. Yeah. No one was surviving anything. You get diarrhea and just die. Yeah. Dysentery. Yeah. There was one family that wrote that they were the only family that didn't resort to cannibalism. Like they were proud of that.
Yeah. I mean, they should be. I mean, they, they're being snobby about it. They bring it up years later. At least we didn't eat our nephew. A lot of people did. Yeah. A lot of people did. We did not though. We did not. We went to college. Yeah. We went to college. I feel like this is like the college, the first college. This is like the, this is like how I feel. Hey, don't make fun of, you know, people not eating other people, you know?
Yeah. It was a part of that Donner group that didn't eat people? No. The Donners ate some people. Yeah. For sure. And the Donners was just a bunch of people. Yeah. They were the ones that led it. It's called the Donner Party because they were the ones that kind of got it. But it was more than just that family. It was 90 people. So there was a few families involved. Lots of kids. Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I just, you got to have some nights up there. I just always like to think, what would be just a down, would you have a down night? Would you ever have, you know, in the heat of all that, they had to survive up there for a while, right? I mean, do you ever have just a night where you just, you know, it's kind of a lazy night, like a night that you would Netflix, you ever had Netflix and chill night? Like in that heat of that moment, or is it the whole time is just barbaric fight, you know, like?
the intensity of it. Is there ever just like a night where you're like a couple nights, if you could talk to them and you go, were any nights good? And they, you know, they'd be like, yeah, you know, Fridays we play games, you know, is there ever that? I do think about there's so many children and what do they do? Do they play? Well, I'm sure they seem like they got them pretty quick. Yeah. Uh, what's like the, yeah. What's the small talk the morning after, uh,
you've started to eat people. Yeah. So did you get some good sleep? Not really. Someone's got to break the tension, you know, tell a joke. Yeah. Someone's got to, yeah. To, you know, I think there's an Aaron in the group and somebody makes that joke. I mean, I think everybody makes that joke. Like, like that joke has, you know,
someone just wakes up pouring salt on joe's leg and they're like he's like i'm just sleeping out but i'm just messing with you like i'm not that hungry right now uh has anybody seen my wife and there was a lot of like pointing over like yeah you know she's gone yeah i think i would just yeah you'd run and just i don't know
Shouldn't went that other way, I guess now. I think you are right. All right. So now people have moved out West and they got to find a way to get the mail there. So the pony express is invented. They used horse mounted riders between Missouri and California, 80 riders, 184 stations, 400 horses stations were about 10 miles apart. Each stop the rider would change to a fresh horse, taking only his mail pouch and,
Riders could not weigh more than 125 pounds, much like jockeys today had to be very small. And then they would go about 7,500 miles on each trip. And just deliver mail. Yeah, it took them about 10 days to get to California. From? From Missouri. From Missouri? Yeah. Is that not very fast? That's faster than I thought it would be. Yeah, but I mean, they're flying. They're not like trotting. Yeah. They're flying.
running as fast as they can on a horse and then they would change to another horse and just run the whole time. Wow.
And they'd have to sleep though, right? Well, they had different rides. So they had stations along the way. Oh, so you would go from here to here and then that person would take off? Yeah. You would go about every 10 miles, you would change horses. So you could get a fresh horse that could run as fast as they could. And after 100 miles, that's when the rider would stop. And he would stop there at that station and they would spend the night there. The riders received about $125 a month.
um which that's a lot of money back there what's 125 equivalent to let me look that up well i just found this is a this is a young young skinny wiry fellow this is a poster for trying to hire people for the pony express wanted young skinny wiry fellows not over 18 must be expert writers willing to risk death daily orphans preferred wow wow
Oh, man. From St. Joseph, Missouri to California. A young, skinny, wiry orphan. Now that says $25 per week. Okay, I thought that's... Yeah. You said $125? About $125 a month. $125 a month. Yeah. In 18... 1860. 1860. I don't know. I'm bombing on the Googles today. Yeah. I mean, I think that was a lot of money back then. Yeah. I mean... So...
Yeah, $3,900 today. And that's what you got a week? That's a month. $4,000 a month. Yeah, that's, I mean, it's not terrible. No, it's a good salary. Yeah. It's like $48,000 a year. Yeah. But I mean, you're risking your...
Risk life. And you don't have parents. And you don't have parents. Yeah. But they're teenagers. Yeah. And you're wiry. Yeah. And you're a teenager. But it only lasted about a year and a half, the Pony Express did. Really? Yep. And then the telegraph service came along, and that was much faster. Wow. What was that? That's when you're like, ding, ding, ding, ding. Yeah. I only know the telegraph for SOS. You know that one? No. You can do it? I can't. Do it on the table.
So it was like one, two, three. And then the O, that's the S, and then the O is three long ones. Yeah. So if you're ever trapped in a box or something. In a well. Well, if it's a well, you can probably just yell something. I was just thinking, I don't know when you need to tap that SOS, but if you're on a ship.
I would hope that if you just heard tapping, you would come. I don't want it to be like, is that SOS? And they go, I think it's SON, so I think we're fine. I would hope in the general rule of a situation, if you're doing tapping...
In 2021, just come. And I'm sure you're going to have some stickler that goes, that's not SOS though. He goes, I know, but no one really knows that anymore. And I'm hearing banging. He's underneath these rocks. Yeah. That's just, I think he's fine. And I think he wants to be under those rocks. He just spelled S-O-D. Okay. That's it.
So if you ever hear that. I thought that was my breathing for a second. I was like, oh my gosh, it's getting worse. So it's three quick ones, three long ones, three quick ones. Yeah. Yeah. Why would they not make this sound just, you know, like. Help. Like three quick ones. Or why don't they make it. That's an S. I know, but why don't they just make it. Like that old knock that everybody just knows. Yeah. You know. Yeah. Yeah.
You talked about that on stage last night. I did talk about that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's like the knock. It's funny, all the different. Yeah. It's like a friend's house. You do that knock. Yeah. And everybody does it. That's his bathroom knock on the stall. Yeah. Yeah, you do it. Why does everybody do that knock? I don't know. How did that knock get around? Or where that rhythm came from? Is that a rhythm in some other song? Something like that? Yeah. Maybe that's where it comes from.
Like an old vaudeville. You look at me because you think I'm going to know the old vaudeville. Back in the vaudeville days. Before doorbells, what did you all do? Is it always that knock? Is that how you knew? It was a friend or foe? We'd SOS it. The foes would... What's the code? How did they look up that knock? What would that knock even be called? How are you going to look it up? Where did the dun-dun-dun-dun knock come from? Where did the standard door knock come from?
rhythm come from this is it looks like some other people it comes from the tune of shaving a haircut two bits oh i love that which is what people sang when they went door to door offering haircuts oh i'm gonna look that song up well i bet i have an idea what it is what it's got to be like that but that's a melodic this probably has a melody don't pay more than 15 seconds
That's true. I don't want them suing us. I don't want whoever owns the copyright to shave and a haircut two bits. You know? Well, it's only a four-second song. Oh, this is just the knock, I think. Oh. This is worthless. Okay. What is it, an ad? All right. Yeah. I know we can't do a Biori. It's a 30-second ad. .com slash name. Magicspoon.com backslash name.
All right. All right. Yeah. Oh, there it is. That's just a knock. Okay. The most famous Pony Express rider was Buffalo Bill Cody. You guys heard of him? I've heard of Buffalo Bill. The serial killer. Yeah. From Silence of the Lambs? Yeah. From Silence of the Lambs. And from the Eminem song. Mine was from something else. No, I grew up near Buffalo Bill. Oh, he's in a movie too?
Well, he was a famous buffalo hunter, but there was another buffalo hunter named Bill Comstock. They both wanted the nickname Buffalo Bill. So they had an eight-hour buffalo shooting match. Your new name is Coco. Coco the monkey. They had a what did they have? They had an eight-hour buffalo shooting match to see who could get exclusive rights to the name. I mean, I would think, I mean, look, that was worth fighting for.
That nickname? Yeah. Look at it. I mean, look, we're talking about it right now. Yeah. I mean, he would be proud. Yeah. So we don't even know which one won. One of them won. No, Buffalo Bill Cody won. And he killed 68 Buffalo and Bill Comstock killed 48. And the Donner family's up there just eating each other on a mountain. We would have loved one of those Buffalo to eat.
You're just genociding them out there. Congratulations, you're Buffalo Bill. Yeah. Buffalo Bill became famous. He started the Buffalo Bill Wild West Touring Show. And it's kind of like a circus, but he had Annie Oakley, American sharpshooter. She could shoot a cigar from her husband's lips from 75 yards away. She could split a playing card on the edge, like down the edge of it, at 30 paces.
And she was the first American female star. Wow. First American female celebrity, huh? Yeah. Annie. Annie Get Your Gun? Annie Oakley. Yep. Annie Oakley. Wow. Wild Bill Hickok? Yeah. You heard him? Yeah. Okay, now we're going somewhere. He was one of the great outlaws of the West. He was also a marshal. They all were. They were all...
Good guys and bad guys. He was a gambler. They're all gamblers. He got in the first quick draw duel with a guy. Yeah. They got an argument over a watch, and they met out in the street. And he drew first, and he hit the guy. The other guy missed, and the other guy yelled, boys, I'm killed. And then he collapsed and died. Wow.
And, I mean, you don't go to jail. You don't go... Well, they would have trials, but they would usually be found innocent. Self-defense. You don't get a jury or your peers. Self-defense? Well, just like, hey, it was a fair fight. We both drew. Yeah. You know? And they go, all right. And everybody says... This is Wild Bill. I mean, he looks...
Everybody looked so miserable back then. He joined Buffalo Bill's roadshow in a play called Scouts of the Plain, but he didn't enjoy acting, so he often hid behind the scenery. And in one show...
They put the spotlight on him. He shot out the lights because of it. And he was released from the group after a few months. So they didn't even get rid of him right there on the spot. Yeah. They just chastised him. All right. You got to strike one, buddy. Yeah. Strike one. He didn't like acting. No. What were spotlights back then?
Do they have actual spotlights? No. Does it have big candles? That's a good question. I wouldn't think they worked into that story. It might not be true. 1873. You might have just got holes right through that story. I don't know. I'm thinking about the movie Tombstone where they do plays and they did have lights on them. Yeah. I don't know. I wonder, can you fashion a spotlight candle? No.
I don't see how. A tort? I mean, did they have lights? Did they have lights during this time? Electricity came along in the late 1800s, but I don't think it would have been prevalent, especially out west. Yeah, out west at a carnival show. Well, yeah. So I'm curious how they're like, they put the spotlight on it, then they cut his mic. And it's like, wait, what happened? This is all made up. Spotlights. I mean, I don't even know. Spotlights in the wild west. Yeah.
He was killed in Deadwood, though. Yeah. At a saloon playing poker. Guy shot him in the back of the head. Oh. So. Came to an end. Yeah. That's how it ends for all of them. Yeah. All these guys. Billy the Kid. You guys heard of him, right? Yeah. I mean, he was killed at age 21. Yeah.
He'd already killed a bunch of people, but Sheriff Pat Garrett shot and killed him. Have you guys seen the movies Young Guns? No. Well, all right. It's kind of the main thing. Emilio Estevez. And Young Guns 1 is just about him rising to power or fame. And Young Guns 2 shows his end, but there's a story. So most people say Billy the Kid died at age 21, but there's a guy in Texas who goes by Brushy Bill who said he was the real Billy the Kid. He lived till he'd be 90. He died in 1950.
Wow. He said he escaped. He said that the sheriff that killed Billy the Kid killed the wrong guy but wouldn't admit it. Yeah. So he's just like, yeah, that's him. That's Billy the Kid. Yeah. And buried him real fast, but then he escaped. So there's a museum in Hico, Texas honoring this guy who they say is the real Billy the Kid. We honor him.
They honor him. Oh, sorry. Honor? No, no, I'm just saying it's funny that they're honoring, like, I mean, an outlaw. Yeah. Like a guy that would technically not be a good guy. Yeah. Right? Right. Billy the Kid was probably just a straight-up murderer. Yeah. There wasn't a lot of honor in him. Yeah.
But it's fascinating. They did some research on him. Imagine they priced him out of his town. Like, this guy was from our town. You're proud of it. Because you'd think that with the Wild West, because it's all kind of cool to us. All that's glorified. These people were a nightmare. Yes. A nightmare. Robbing banks and just raiding towns and stuff.
Yeah. So they checked the guy. Some researcher, right before he died, met with him. He had five bullet wounds that matched, five bullet scars that matched where Billy the Kid had been shot. So they're like, why? How can he do that? How can he fake it? Yeah. So...
That's pretty good evidence. It's about as good as evidence you're going to get back then. They tried to do a DNA test, but I believe the kid's gravesite in New Mexico got washed away in a flood, so they don't know where his body is. It's awfully convenient, huh? Yeah, it is convenient. So he may have lived to be 90 when most of them died very early. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Paul Newman, Robert Redford movie, those were real guys. They robbed trains, banks.
stuff like that good good good a lot of robin trains yep it was a big thing back then were these people looked as heroes back then like did they or they it was like the mafia and the fact that you know like some people loved al capone or some people uh escobar like there was towns that worshiped him because he would pay for their whole towns and give them money and all this it's almost like robin hood in a way you know yeah but yeah but it's it's yeah robin hood but was like
He was stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. I mean, Escobar destroyed people's lives. Yeah. And I mean, when he blew up the city, you know, like if he didn't like the way the government went. Yeah, blew up an airplane? Yeah. Yeah, and blew up an airplane. I mean, just a horrendous person. And these guys, are they like that?
I mean, I think it was a little bit like you said, the morals of today weren't quite like they were back then as far as good and bad. Nobody was like considered all good or all bad. Jesse James, another famous trained robber, bank robber, hung out in Nashville for a couple of years. Oh, wow. Laid low in Nashville. Then he got bored and was like, I'm getting back out there and getting to it.
But he was kind of like a Robin Hood, some people thought, but it sounded like he kept most of the money to himself. Yeah. They get into it. So not really. Yeah. He was shot by his new gang recruit, Robert Ford, played by Casey Affleck. You know that movie? I'm just trying to... Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt played Jesse James. Oh, yeah. Yeah. All right. That's what Jesse James... Jesse James looks like a wiry fellow. Yeah. He looks like a Pony Express rider. Pony Express rider. Yeah. Yeah.
So he was killed by that guy? Yeah, that guy had his own problems, and the government said, you killed Jesse James, and we'll wipe away. You'll get a pardon. Yeah. So he shot him in the back. Yeah. I actually haven't seen that movie, but I know you're a Casey Affleck fan, so I thought maybe you'd see it. Yeah, I do like Casey Affleck a lot. He's a good actor. Wyatt Earp.
Tombstone? You've seen Tombstone? No. I've never seen Tombstone either. Isn't it the most famous Wild West movie? Especially modern times, I would say. So many people quote it because of Al Kilmer, Scott Holliday, stuff like that. So Wyatt Earp, we know him
he was a Marshall in Dodge city. Then he went to tombstone, Arizona and he got into a fight with this gang called the Cowboys. And the movie was very realistic. Seems like from what I read on here. And then they had a shootout at the okay. Corral. You guys. Okay. Corral. Right. Yeah. Where is that? Tombstone, Arizona. Okay. And doc holiday was Wyatt Earp's friend. So they, uh, they got in this interaction with the, uh,
With the Cowboys. And that was the famous shootout that happened. But a lot more stuff happened in the movie. But Wyatt Earp definitely portrays the good guy. Yeah, would they... So those shootouts would be... Would they be in the middle of the street? Like in the... Well, the corral was kind of like a side alley kind of thing. It said it lasted for 30 seconds. What you think about it, that's a long time for a shootout. Yeah. But it was the Earp brothers...
Did just everybody have a gun on them? Because that's what I imagine is just everybody has a gun. This is what the argument was supposedly about, because in Tombstone, you're supposed to give up your weapons at the city limits. Oh, okay. So when you come into town, you're supposed to put your gun up.
The cowboys were a gang. They didn't do it. And that's what they went down there to do, to disarm them. Yeah. Wow. Didn't work out. So it's, yeah. So the idea of it was so you could like relax. I guess, yeah. Yeah. No one has guns. You're like, hey, we can chill out. Just take a breather. Like in John Wick, that hotel that they stay at.
I haven't seen John Wick. Oh, yeah. It's good. John Wick, there's a hotel they stay at, and the point of it is you can't do anything at that hotel. And so it's like, so these people that end up, have these kind of crazy things, they go, oh, I want to go here. No one has guns. I don't have to feel like I'm, like, watching everybody. They can get drunk. They can do whatever they wanted to do. Yeah. Like, that would be the idea of it. It's like a little ceasefire. Yeah. And these guys didn't do it.
Wyatt Earp, I was surprised about this. You guys may not be. But he was most known when he died for refereeing in a heavyweight boxing championship that was very controversial because he ruled that the guy had an illegal punch and disqualified him. And a lot of people lost money in it. And they thought he fixed the fight for himself and it hurt his reputation. And it was just like...
He was a ref? Yeah. I mean, Wyatt Earp lived to 1929. Yeah. That's kind of crazy. There's people alive today who were alive when Wyatt Earp was alive. Yeah. He consulted in Hollywood movies at the end of his career. When they started making Westerns, he lived in LA and consulted with Hollywood stars, Western stars about movies. Yeah. They were his pallbearers. Oh, really? Yeah. Like old Western silent movie stars. Mm-hmm.
Wow. I can tell you guys are thrilled. No, I grew up watching all... My grandpa would always have westerns on. He'd always have Gunsmoke and Bonanza and all these shows. So he loved John Wayne. Named his kid after John Wayne, one of my uncles. Oh, really? He loved John Wayne that much. So those were always on when I was over at my grandparents' house. Yeah. So I love them all. I don't think I've watched one John Wayne movie. Really? I was never a big Wild West fan.
movie fan. Like, I never saw Tombstone. He's better than John Candy. Huh? John Wayne? I'm just kidding.
I haven't seen any John Candy movies. You haven't seen any John Wayne? I mean, John Wayne was like... Is he one of the first Hollywood celebrities? Not one of the first, but he's certainly like... That's who you think of as the man's man Hollywood star. Yeah, not the first celebrity, but iconic. I mean, he's just such a huge name. John, who would be before him that was...
Well, Charlie Chaplin was such a big figure. Maybe. He made 83 Westerns. John Wayne did. 83? What about typecasting? Out of 140. I feel like you're like 70 movies in. I feel like I've told this story before. You're just out of stuff by then. He's not writing them. He's just working. He shows up and does them. He's working. He's living the dream.
I guess so. It's a ton of movies. True Grit. I've seen True Grit. I've never seen any of it. That was a good movie. True Grit. Well, you probably saw the remake. I saw the original too, but I have seen the remake. Yeah. Remake was with Jeff Bridges. I know there's stuff you remember probably from John Wayne that you're like quotes and all that kind of stuff. Yeah. He just calls everybody Pilgrim. Yeah. Yeah. That's his thing. Yeah. Yeah.
Doc Holliday was a dentist in Atlanta. That's how he got the name Doc. Who was Doc Holliday? What did he do? You never heard of him? You've never heard of Doc Holliday? I've heard the name before. I don't know who it was, though. Okay. He looks like a lunatic from this picture. Well, he was Wyatt Earp's friend and played by Val Kilmer in the movie Tombstone. Okay. I'm Your Huckleberry. You ever heard that? Yeah, I've heard it. Oh, for sure. Yeah. So he had a lot of lines in that movie.
He was just a gambler and an outlaw, and sometimes sheriff's deputy when need be, like they all were back then. They were all gamblers. They were all trying to make money. Wyatt Earp was just always trying to make money. He would just go town to town. Were they married or did they have families or anything? Well, Doc Holliday hung out with a woman named Big Nose Kate. She had one prominent figure they saw on her face that was...
Little more prominent. She was a dance hall woman, occasional prostitute. Occasional. Yeah. Just when times were tough. She just dabbles in it. Is your girl doing it? You're like, not all the time, but you know.
So he traveled. Wyatt Arp had a wife. And I mean, in the movie, it doesn't work out. He ends up with another woman. That's one way the movie's different because they show them living happily ever after. But in real life, it said she was a nightmare. Oh, really? Just wore him out. He was trying to write his biography at the end of his life. And she was always in the room saying, you can't say that. You can't say that. And just ruined the book, they said. Yeah.
Why couldn't he say it? She's like, don't tell him everything. Or sometimes she was just like, she said, I think it was the word crack. She's like, you got to put in the word crack a lot. And the word crack was used like 129 times in the book. Like, I think she wanted the gunshot to be crack or something like that. Oh, okay. They say it was one of the worst books ever written. Because she had a bunch of sayings. She wanted it to be crack when I...
When a gunshot was fired. I can't remember. It was some word like that that she's like, you got to put that in. I don't think anybody. You know what that's called? What? A word that describes the sound of something. Do you think I know what it's called? No. Okay. I bet you've heard of it before. Yeah. Onomatopoeia. Yeah. I have heard of it. I don't think anybody's ever had it. Onomatopoeia.
Crack for a gunshot. Onomatopoeia is actually not that hard of a word to say. But if you look at it, you'd be like, oh, no. I don't know. Onomatopoeia. It kind of just finishes itself. You start on it, and you're like, well, I'm going to go ahead and get onomatopoeia. Might as well do monopoeia. Yeah, we're already down there. Crack is... Bad. I mean, that doesn't sound... Yeah, it is. I may have the wrong word. It was something like that. No, but crack would be funny for a gunshot. Because I...
I haven't heard too many guns go off. I don't think it sounds like... Did this all just come to a stop, too? Yeah, I mean, around the 1900s, I mean, it wasn't just like overnight, but things started becoming a little bit more civilized, I guess, and things just started evolving. Things started getting better and just settling in the West. Saloons were just a crazy thing out West. I mean, it was a lot like, again, the movies, if you guys had seen one, where you just go in and...
It's kind of crazy. People are playing cards and they said you don't ask anyone's full name because that's considered rude. Because they don't want you to give, nobody wants to give too much information about themselves. Yeah. They're all kind of outlaws. Everybody's up to stuff. They're always kind of just up to stuff. It's rude to ask someone's name. You know, they said you wouldn't ask someone how many horses they own because that's like asking for someone's tax returns. It's just, just mind your business kind of thing. Wow.
Wow. If someone walks in, you offer them... No, the guy who walks in has to offer to buy you a drink. And if he doesn't... To the bar? To the guy... If you walk in and stand at the bar, you have to offer the guy standing there, let me buy you a drink. And if you don't, it's considered rude. And sometimes they would take a guy just out and drag him saloon to saloon, beating him and showing, this is how you do some manners. So anybody, just whoever's standing next to you. Yeah. Yeah.
So you could walk in and like, let me get you a drink. Like you just talk to the random person. Yeah. Yeah. A simpler time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. What is the point of those doors that you always see walking into a saloon that like swinging doors? Yeah. What's the point of those? They don't go all the way to the ground. It's like, what is this doing? Well, they said it was to keep, um, sophisticated women and modest women from seeing what's going on in there. But I don't understand why a regular door wouldn't do that same thing.
Also, what, the modest women would be able to see it? They could just look underneath it? No, like, saying that they don't want to know what's happening in there. Yeah, it's supposed to block your view, but I don't understand that logic, how it would seem like a regular door would do better. Yeah. I think there's a lot of, when you've got to get out of a saloon door, you've got to get out of a saloon door. Like, I don't think it's, and that's just an easy, quick...
Like get out. Yeah. I mean, it makes it better. If it was a regular door, I mean, you know, who cares? Like that is pretty crazy. That saloon door is, it means everything. Yeah. Everybody thinks about that. Yeah. Um,
Now, some places they said had both doors because they got to lock up sometime. They got to have a way to lock up. And the weather sometimes was so bad. If you just had a swinging door, they're like, dude, it's cold. Where did you say this was? All in Arizona? No, it's all over the West. Yeah. Deadwood? Yeah. Did you ever watch Deadwood? No. All right. That was in South Dakota. That's where Wild Bill was killed.
In a saloon in South Dakota. And they would just travel from... Are trains going? That's when this all started happening? So that's when... Trains are happening. Imagine these guys. So these guys, anything that gets invented, they're just like robbing. Yeah. Security's... Yeah. Not good. Not any of this stuff. But I think they just all try to make money. They didn't respect authority. They didn't like...
If you're a soldier or anything, anyone that... They didn't like that. They're outlaws. They like independence, stuff like that. Although a lot of them were Civil War deserters, people that either fought in the Civil War and didn't want to do it and got out, stuff like that. Most of this happened in the late 1800s. All these guys lived about the same time, from 1860 to 1890. Yeah.
And they all were pretty young. They all died probably. Most of them, like. Yeah. Doc Holliday died when he was like 36. Tuberculosis. Oh, TB. Yeah. Yeah. That's why he moved out west, because they thought the dry weather would help his tuberculosis. Yeah. That's how in Red Dead Redemption, your character gets tuberculosis and dies. Yeah. That's what you deserve for killing those innocent people. Yeah. Yeah.
I guess so. I guess it's karma in a way. So you're in a shootout, but the way you die is from... The end of the storyline is, yeah, your character gets tuberculosis and just keels over. Yeah, so if anybody wants to play this game now, just don't even worry about it. It's been out for a few years, man. I just downloaded it because I was going to go through it. Are you serious? Yeah. I thought I would go through it. Are you actually... Yeah, you talked me into it. I was like, I'll play it. And then like, yeah. Play the Oregon Trail.
Yeah. I'm sorry. No, I didn't download it. You feel real bad. Geronimo was one of the famous Native Americans. You guys heard Geronimo? Oh, yeah. And so he was so great at escaping, jumping from...
getting out of caves, stuff like that. That's when people started yelling Geronimo. Yeah. Paratroopers started yelling it when jumping from airplanes. They would yell Geronimo, but it was just like a way to honoring something very daring. Yeah. Was there one named Cowabunga too? Yeah. That's where that comes from. No, he was just his brothers to Cannonball. Cannonball!
Was he Alaskan, Geronimo? Why do I think of Alaska? No. Is that just a weird, got some synapses twisted up in my head? Yeah, that's just you. Where is he from? Memphis? Knox County?
To be honest with you, I had some printer issues. Most of this I'm going off memory now. For Geronimo, that's what I have right there. Oh, nothing. Where'd you print it at? At home. Oh. But something I didn't realize. He's from, uh, born in Mexico. Okay. Not Alaska. Nope.
Sitting bull. Another guy led a battle against Custer. Custer's last stand. That's what I yell whenever I sit down. Sitting bull. Sitting bull. The bull's sitting down. When they said, Eric, I'll get your help out here, the bull has already sat. And when sitting bull sits. He sits. He sits. He's not getting back up. Yeah.
There's one story about a saloon I meant to mention. So there was one in Abilene, Texas called the Bull's Head Tavern. And the owner painted a bull doing something, a crude act outside the wall of his tavern. And the marshal at the time was Wild Bill Hickok. And he said,
paint over that people were obscene they don't like this obscene gesture and the guy refused to do it so wild bill ended up painting over himself and then the guy got mad about it they ended up getting in a fight and wild bill killed the the saloon owner that's kind of funny right yeah that's hilarious that's so funny you're like wild bill said paint over this or else or else what or else i'll do it myself so he went and painted over it he just got fed up with it
I just think it's funny that this bull made this obscene gesture for the whole town to see. They had storekeepers. There's always a general store. The catalog. I don't know. I feel like that story, I don't think it was worth going back to. I thought it was going to go somewhere. Oh, I got a great one here. Guy painted an obscene picture and then the sheriff just painted over it.
Yeah. He killed him. I know, but then you kind of trailed off at that part. I thought by then you guys might jump on board with it and we'd be running away with it. Yeah. I would have been more on board with like, if it's like the quick version of is a guy painted an empty gesture. He said, change it. He said no. And so we killed him.
Like that was just a quick spell. Well, that was the first run of it. I'll tighten it up when I try it out next time. Yeah. Throw it out there and see what sticks. When y'all do commentary on Aaron Land. Got a big guest today. Got breakfast coming in. It's like on the Stern Show. They always talk about it.
Ball of that. One of the most ruthless general store owners was Andrew J. Myrick in Minnesota. When the Sioux Indians were out of food, he said, let them eat grass. And I think you have a picture of Andrew Myrick. Do I? Because we've discussed him on a previous episode. Oh, really? Nate's great-great-grandfather. Well, that's the movie they made about it.
There he is. Oh, that guy. Oh, really? Wow. That was that guy? That was that guy, yeah. He came back around. That is crazy, dude. And when the Dakota War started, he was killed the first day. And they found his mutilated body with grass stuffed in his mouth and other places. Oh, wow. Dude, that's wild, dude. I mean, I just look at it. And that was you? Yeah. Yeah.
And then someone made a movie poster whenever they do make the movie. You and Lou Diamond Phillips. Yeah. I mean, it's hard to tell the difference between those two pictures. Yeah. Pretty wild.
It's amazing just the amount of death and destruction going on back then. I mean, just everybody... Does everybody just get slaughtered? You know, I looked up... Is that how everybody dies? Well, I looked up how dangerous those towns were back then compared to now. Yeah. And there's always... Most things you'll read will say, oh, it's much worse now. You know, gun violence and stuff like that. Really? The numbers obviously are higher now because there's so many more people. Yeah. But still, I mean...
Well, you could just openly get away with it back then. Much more back then. That's the probably part. That's the scarier part. Like now, the threat of jail is there and you're going to... No one's going to... You can't just go shoot someone in the street now and just be like, it's fine. It's a little bit more of a thing. But back then, and that sheriff killed the guy for painting that thing. Like, you know, it's like, that just seems insane. Like, it's going to lead up to that. Yeah. I mean, these people have killed so many people. I mean, you got to think...
You know, think about like, if you know someone, if you knew someone that's killed someone by a gun, like that's crazy. And back then it was like, they all did, you know? Yeah. But I bet there was a lot of people that were just like, yeah, it was normal. It was, you know. Yeah, I guess if you're not an outlaw robbing banks and stuff, you might have a pretty normal life. I mean, it wasn't a day-to-day thing. We're listing all of the most famous cases, you know, over a few decades. Yeah. But...
These guys killed a few people. Entertainment Weekly did the top movies, westerns, modern westerns. Unforgiven, number one, Clint Eastwood. Have you guys seen that? No. Okay. So when you suggested we do Wild West, what were you thinking? I haven't watched them. The movies. You talking about the movies? No, but you suggested it's a topic. I just thought about it. Like I thought there'd be a lot of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Trying to come up with something, you know?
It's hard when you gotta do it alone. Dances with Wolves? Anybody seen that? I've seen it once. There's a... I remember a very funny part. Seen it as a kid. Yeah? Wasn't that where he's getting that stick? He goes, what is that?
They're setting the fire, and the guy just goes, what's that? What is that? And I remember seeing that as a kid, and we thought it was the funniest. We used to do it all the time, and we thought it was the funniest thing ever. That scene. That scene. That's so funny. I know what you're talking about, but that's such a not memorable scene. When did this movie come out? 1990. Yeah, I mean, I was like 11, 12 years old. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think he...
farts in that scene. He does. Yeah. So like, yeah. So that scene was just, it just had everything. You never had everything. And it was very, very funny. He was the wagon guy who took, yeah. Took Kevin Costner out West. What is that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause he was scared. No, Kevin Costner was just staring off like pondering life. I was like, what is that? What is that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was the first movie that kind of portrayed, uh, supposedly native Americans, uh,
in complex ways, not just like savages. Yeah. You know, things like that. They got a lot of stuff wrong, but it was a start. Yeah. Um, I mean, have you guys seen any, any Westerns? No. Uh,
No, I don't think it has. Open Range, great movie. 310 to Yuma. Maybe I'll start. I need to watch that. Christian Bale. Yeah. I'll go watch that. I just watched this movie. It's a new one with Tom Hanks called News of the World. Yeah. Do you guys see it? I've not seen that one. Yeah, the premise of it is that there's all these little towns where no one can read.
Yeah. And so Tom Hanks, his character, this is like a job back then. You just go from town to town and read the newspaper to people. And that's your job. And people would just gather in like town halls and pay money just to hear what was going on in the world. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. Yeah.
And that's how he made money. That's how he made money. That was his job. He could just read. Is the movie good? I don't remember. No, it wasn't that good. But just the whole premise of it was really interesting to me. Yeah, do you want to give the ending away? He dies of tuberculosis. No way. Yeah. And who tells the townspeople that? How do they even hear about it? Oh, that's a good point. I bet he taught somebody along the way.
I bet there's a little girl or something. There is a little girl. There always is. Yeah, he takes in a little girl and adopts her. Yeah. Well, I'll end on this. Some of the popular TV shows, Yellowstone, modern day western now. People love it. Yeah, it's one of the most popular shows. Deadwood was really big a few years ago, Justified. Gunsmoke, up until just recently, The Simpsons just passed Gunsmoke for most episodes of any scripted show. Wow. Gunsmoke had 635 episodes. Wow.
And The Simpsons just passed. I think they have like 639 now. That's so many episodes. Yeah, but Gunsmoke, you should get more credit. You should. Yeah, like that's, you know. And Gunsmoke was over 20 seasons. Simpsons is like 32 now. So Gunsmoke was cranking out a bunch each season. Yeah, wow. Yeah. Why do you think Gunsmoke gets more credit than The Simpsons? The Simpsons is animated. Like, Gunsmoke, they had, real actors had to show up and
You know, Simpsons is like you're going in and doing... I'm not taking anything away from The Simpsons, but you could do it from your house. I could read all my lines from my house. And now they have to write the shows, coming up with that, being as good of a show, taking nothing away from The Simpsons. That's impressive. But...
acting real having real actors and have to props and all that you could the simpsons essentially you could never leave a room and get it all made you know they i mean they got it's such a machine some reason i thought the animation would be more time intensive it is very impressive i think it is i think it is but uh it's it's you know i'd also say simpsons is 30 minutes where gun smoke was an hour
Oh, that's a good point. In a way, it's twice as many. Yeah. Yeah. That's like 1,200 episodes. Yeah. Good point. All right. I'm convinced. I came around. All right. Yeah. Yeah. I think this one's all right. Yeah. I'm tired. I got a lot. There's a lot happening. There's a lot going on.
March 18th. Your album came out too. It came out. Yeah. Yeah. On Friday. It's number one on iTunes. Yeah. We checked her up for this podcast. Oh, it's still number one. It went back. Oh, and back to number one. Wow. Pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome, dude. Yeah. Thanks for your NFL hat. Just your Rob Lowe. This is a Rob Lowe. Uh, congrats, man. That's awesome. Uh, yeah. So go buy shirts and skins on, uh, uh,
It's on everything. Yeah. And it's number one. So it's easy to find right now. Yeah. All right. That is it. This is, yeah, my special March 18th. Netflix. Don't forget that. Greatest Average American.
A lot going on. Bates, album. You have an album. Yep. Easy out. You can buy it at most cattle auctions or other fundraising events. Yeah. Yeah. And we get asked the guy that reads the news to you. It's basically, that's the review of the... I have about 500 hard copies in the trunk of my car. Yeah. If anybody wants one. We're going to hand out...
Brian's a driver's license number. So just keep it, look out for that. And if you see it and grab it, uh, all right, everybody. Thank you. See you next week.