203: Fluffer
47:33 Share

MITRE is investing in a massive AI supercomputer to power a new federal AI sandbox. With AI's potential to drive transformational advances across industries, MITRE's expertise in healthcare, cybersecurity, transportation, finance, climate, and national security will be critical. Transform your career while helping solve problems for a safer world. Visit MITRE.org slash careers. That's M-I-T-R-E dot org slash careers.

Okay, you say, I want some breakfast. Your so-called boyfriend says, we got eggs in the fridge. Obviously, when you say breakfast, you mean McDonald's. Definitely a side-eye situation. Bring home the bacon, steak patty, or others with a BOGO for $1 breakfast. Only in the app. Limited time only at participating McDonald's. Valid once a day. Must opt into rewards. Visit McDApp for details. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba.

That's F.

F-A-C-E-T dot com. This ad is sponsored by Facet. Facet Wealth Incorporated is an SEC registered investment advisor. This is not an offer to buy or sell securities, nor is it investment, legal, or tax advice.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living Associates have been committed to creating a vibrant culture and delivering exceptional services, making Brightview a great place to work and live. If you're looking for a rewarding opportunity to serve your local community and grow, we want you to join our team. Brightview Senior Living is growing and actively seeking vibrant associates to join our community teams, including directors, healthcare, activities, hospitality, and dining. Apply today at careers.brightviewseniorliving.com. Equal employment opportunities.

Text BVJOBS to 97211 to apply. Ring, ring, ring, ring. May I please speak with Zoe? Oh, hello, Lamorne. Let's patch in Hannah. God, I forgot what it was like working with you guys. Welcome to the show.

I really love, I wish this was the podcast. Let's just talk about Eric Andre's deck and the myth of the big deck. I could call him. I could call him right now. I can call him right now too. You want to call him and ask him? You want to call him? Hey, Eric, we're doing a podcast right now. What's going on, man? You got, you got, you got a, you got a solid 10. Hey, Amrata, how is your service? Hold on. I'm going to FaceTime Eric right now. And this is going to be part of the podcast. No, it's not. Just hit record. I got to go. We got to go.

I hit record already. I hit record already. And I just gotta know. Try recording again. Why? I just gotta know. But why? I just gotta know. Oh, it's Valentine's Day. There's no way he's gonna answer this. It's Valentine's Day. He has emrata. I know. I'm stuck with Hannah.

I'm so sorry. No, that's okay. That is a fact. That's an appropriate response. I'm over here with Hannah. I don't want to be stuck with me either. If I could have Amarant, I would too. Okay, let's go. Hey! I'm going to leave him a message. I'm going to leave him a message. I'm going to leave him a very, very... And Hannah, you're going to leave him a message too. Although he can't hear you right now because you're in my ear. You know, this is part of it. I love Eric. He knows I love him. This is part of the podcast.

Hey, Eric, man, me and Hannah are doing this podcast right now. And, you know, we just do this new girl recap. And we have we start the podcast off with, you know, something that's kind of clouding our day or whatever's been going on.

And the thing that we're curious about is how do you do it, man? Are you walking around here with a solid 10? Are you walking around here with a soft eight that moves up to a strapping 12? What's going on, man? You know, Hannah and I were just curious about it. And, you know, get back to us, man. We love you. And we want to hear we want to hear more from you. Look at look at the look on his face.

This is my question to you is, Lamorne, is how many times have you left a message like this for a friend of yours? A lot of times. How many of your guy friends you call say, I need the inches. I need to know your inches. I got it. Listen, I got to know only because, you know, she's someone who I've been after for a while. She doesn't respond to any of my showing up at her house unannounced. She did a movie with Jake Johnson. Yeah, I know. She was a new girl.

She was a new girl? She was a new girl. Fun fact, she was in an episode of New Girl. Was Eric? Was Eric ever on New Girl? Eric was never on New Girl. I don't think. I did a movie with Eric called Flock of Dudes. Flock of Dudes, that's right. He's so lovely. He's great. He's the best.

But anyway, the randomness of today. Sorry about talking about friends and talking about love, talking about sex. That's all in this episode 203 of Fluffer. Give us the recap, Lamorne. Let's go. Fluffer. Yes. OK, so here's the deal. Jess needs to be mentally stimulated before she can get physical. No.

Now, if you guys don't know what a fluffer is, Google it. Just don't Google fluffer with XXX afterwards. That's strange. Just don't go to Google images. Just Google and do the words, the words page. The Wikipedia page for fluffer. Now, you enter the new bestie, Nick, right? He makes her laugh.

He makes her dinner. He makes her laugh at dinner sometimes. You know, he takes trips to the second closet, Ikea. You know what I mean? And then he even builds her dressers. That's his thing. He does all that type of stuff with Jess before she goes off and bones Sam.

That's strange. Now, Winston feels like Jess has taken advantage of Nick by having him fluff her for Sam and encourages Nick to set healthier boundaries with Jess. We've all been there. Now, meanwhile, Schmidt is still spiraling from his breakup with CeCe. OK, he pretends to go to a club.

and he wants to run into Kanye, but he's really lightly stalking his ex. We've all been, I've never done that. I'm not gonna, I've never done that. I've felt urged to do something like that. Never done it. Okay. I don't go to the coffee shop on Ventura that she sometimes goes to. I've never done that. Okay. Now,

Winston's tag Romney maneuver gets them past the club security. Schmidt becomes Romney bait for some sorority girls. Now he dubs himself Tug, Tug Romney, and he goes on a date, which is a very strange thing. Unfortunately, these Romney super fans, they sniff out Schmidt's lies quickly. And luckily, CeCe comes over and helps soothe him with her, dare I say it, her mammaries. Her mammaries. She

her food satchels for babies. Moving on. Okay. Now, Winston and Shelby, they're struggling like they always are. The dry spell, you know, they're going through a bit of a dry spell and it causes Winston to cheat.

on Shelby, but in his mind, which is something I think most people do. Now, when he reveals his infidelity to Shelby, she tells him that, you know, he could think about whatever he wants and declares their fight over. Winston doesn't think the fight is over because he doesn't think it ever started. He's frustrated by this. Okay. They have no action going on. There's nothing going on between these two. And Jess decides to open up a dialogue with Sam.

However, things become awkward when he tells her the only reason he would build furniture for a woman is if they were married. Jess rethinks the way she's been treating Nick. Together, they set healthy boundaries and settle on being friends who are sometimes attracted to each other. And that's what happens in 203 Fluffer. Directed by Fred Goss. Written by J.J. Philbin.

Ooh, there's so much to dive into on this episode. Let's, before we dive in, I got a response from Eric. Before we dive in, I got a response from Eric. He says, I never kiss until happy Black History Month. Oh, man, he won't tell us, but it's Black History Month. So I know he, you know, he got that Thurgood Marshall going on. Okay. He got that. Okay. All right. Oh my gosh.

Got that third good. All right, keep going. I also feel like we're probably the one millionth text voicemail that Eric has gotten today. I think that was a copy and paste. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, he said that to a lot of people.

All right, let's dive in. I mean, this is what this whole episode's about. Relationships, boundaries, what makes a relationship a relationship. Exactly. Exactly. I personally...

I haven't gone through anything. Well, I mean, it's it's I've never been called out for going going through something like this. But I do have friends that, you know, you do everything with, you know, you go shopping with them. You're there. You're the shoulder for them to lean on, to cry on. You give them dating advice.

But I don't look at them that way. I don't look at them the way... Or maybe they look at you that way. They don't. Because I shit with the door open sometimes. It's disgusting. Don't. Well, that's like true intimacy, actually. Nobody wants that from me. True intimacy. I mean, to be honest with you, I don't want to jump to the end, but I do feel like the way this episode ends where...

Nick basically says, look, exactly what you just said. We're friends. And yes, sometimes I build your dresser and sometimes, you know, I'll make you a cup of tea and bring it to you. And our friendship doesn't look like most male female friendships. But we just have to accept that we are friends that are sometimes attracted to each other.

Yeah. Have you ever been in anything like that? You know, I know right now you probably can't talk about it because. No, you know what's interesting? It made me think what made me think of is that and it was about a piece of IKEA furniture. And I had a very one of my best friends was a guy friend and he was so sweet and so lovely. And my like our families knew each other. And it was so it was just he was my best friend. Yeah.

And I knew like girls he had crushes on and I would try to be like a wing woman. But yeah, we were like in our sweatpants watching, you know, like a movie three times a week and hanging out and getting food. And to me, my brother wasn't living here at the time. And so I was like, he's like my brother. This is awesome. Like to have I just know that companionship my whole life of having a brother and I love it. Yeah.

But I remember we went to Ikea to get something and there was this really, it was like the higher end Ikea, this kind of like cubby kind of thing you put by the front door. And it was really expensive and I couldn't afford to buy it. But I was like, man, it's so great. And then he bought it for me and then like built it and it was in my house. And then I was like, I think my best friend really, really like likes me.

And I had to do a friendship breakup because I loved him so much as my friend. And I realized as long as we were kicking it, and he was such a catch and such a wonderful person, he was actually never going to put himself out there because he'd much rather hang out with me. And I think his feelings were deeper. He wasn't going to put himself out there. He wasn't going to put himself out there. You weren't going to put out. That was...

I didn't have the feelings. I'm the Jess. I was like, I just, I don't have the feelings. I don't feel that way about you. I see you as my brother, which is probably the worst thing that any man could ever hear. Okay. We're driving back into the episode. Let's go. Wow. Can I just ask, where is he now? What's if he's, I don't know. We've, I had a friendship breakup so that he could go find someone else. And that man was none other than Eric country. Sorry.

Oh, circle. What's up, Eric? So let's so let's dive back into the beginning of this episode. You know, strange thing happened in the beginning. Well, she leaves him in her room. Crayons. You know, I can't have casual sex. She realized it's not working for her anymore. It's it. She thought she could.

And she can't just go from walking down the street to like jump in someone's bones. It just doesn't feel right to her. She can't do it. Yeah. So the, the, but in that moment there was a little back and forth between her and, and, and Nick, which I thought was funny. She says, what did she say? My shorty on the side. Why can't I have a shorty on the side? Is that what she said? Yeah.

She did. Nick said, you know, you didn't use that term correctly. I think she did. I think she used it correctly, too. I just think that tells more about Nick than it does her. Yeah, I was confused. He's like, no, you can't say it that way. Like, actually, funny enough, she got it. She got it right. I got a lot of shorties. So I get it. Also, something I thought that was very interesting about and kind of timely.

Um, was, you know, during this time, I mean, obviously Kanye has been a huge figure, I think for a very, very long time now, but this obsession that this Jewish man has with Kanye West, I thought was very, that was very, very funny. Uh, what do you, what?

Oh, if they could see into the future. Oh, my gosh. One other thing I love in this episode, because there's so many really teeny tiny nods to like series, what happens during the series. And they just give us like little tastes is that they inadvertently put Nick and Jess on their first like romantic date together. They did. And as an audience, you get to see what a perfect relationship.

match they are that he can be like a bit of like an oddball goofy silly weirdo yeah with her um and she can do something like smuggle booze into the fancy restaurant which you would think is such like a nick character trait like it's it makes you as an audience root for them and and it's so early on because they don't get together till way later um

But it was such like a nice little like gift that Liz kind of gave us of seeing them be romantic and then seeing like the heartbreak of the whole thing where it's him loving her so much as a friend to do that for her so she could be with someone else. And I like it because it was even set up that everything surrounding it was set up as a date. I mean, they live together. However, they arrived, they arrived separately. Yeah, I know. So what...

And then what I found to be also interesting and also telling a bit foreshadowing is when she gets that message from Sam to leave, you could tell right away. Nick is like,

Internally, you know, he's jealous. Yeah. He's jealous. Yeah, it's sweet. It's like those old kind of rom-com moments. It felt... This is another one of those episodes that kind of just felt like a bit like a movie. Because it had those kind of... Those moments that feel bigger than usually just like than a 22-minute episode of TV. It's hard for me to think of it as a sweet moment. It's beautiful, for sure. And I get it, you know. However, it's hard for me to be like, oh, man, that's such a sweet moment. Because...

We see how they do it. We see how Sam and Jess do it. It's aggressive. It's aggressive. Just imagine being Nick on that date, knowing like, oh man, I just paid for half a soup and shared this love and laugh with her. And now she's about to just get tossed around that room. Yeah, I know. I hate that for him. I do. I hate that for him too. But that's those moments where you kind of really like root for them together because Nick kind of comes off often as a bit...

uh i don't know on the out the with some weird life things that he likes to do that you don't automatically think that just would be a really good pairing for him but then you see how far he's willing to go to like support her and then you all of a sudden go like no no no they've got the things that matter they got that foundation yeah i want them to be together so i think because we know it like works out that's why i think it's sweet i guess

Oh, yeah. Especially when you go back and rewatch it. In the moment, when you're watching it as in 2012 or whenever this episode came out, you know, when you're watching it in the moment, it is a bit gut-wrenching for you. Yeah. Because you're like, as an audience member, you're like, man, this better pay off. This better pay off. It's also one of those moments, like this episode, where Winston, like,

Like, just give some really good advice. Yeah. He gives some really good advice. And, like, it's really good for just to be called out. It's like that moment with my friend who built the IKEA furniture. Yeah. Where I had to be like, hmm.

yeah, this person is trying to play a long game and it's not going to happen. And so I have to like, let him go because he's not going to change what he wants and I'm not going to change what I want. And if I really care about you as a friend, I gotta let you go. And it's hard. It's hard to be grown up in the moment. And it's interesting to watch Nick and Jess kind of navigate that, but that's all Winston. Yeah.

Calling it out and naming it. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. My question for you. Yeah. Moving moving on to the Schmidt storyline. Obviously, he goes on a date with one of these super fans, the Romney super fans.

You know, in those, in that, in, in that moment, you know, uh, what is, what is going on inside of Cece's skull? You know, when she, obviously she's moving on. Here's the thing that's so funny when she sees him at the club, the thing that made me think of instantly, and I'm sure you didn't notice this, but it reminded me of it because it was a big chat on set is that, um,

Nikki Alkari, Nikki Chestnut now married, who did my hair for many, many, many, many years on New Girl. She still cuts my bangs to this day. She's the best. But we decided just like, oh, Cece's out of the club and she's a model. You know, she likes to kind of play with her look. And we pulled my bangs back. OK, I was wearing a red leather dress and we pulled my bangs back. And there was an uproar.

On set. I walked onto set because it's not like our looks got pre-approved, what we did with hair and makeup, because there's it's a network sitcom. So there's you know, you really only can kind of move on the scale between like a four and a six.

You kind of always have to look the same for a decade. That's my scale right there between a four and a six. That's my playing area right there. That's right. You can't just show up and be like, I have a huge beard and massive hair now and just make it work with the character. Network sitcoms don't work like that. It's a very odd thing, especially when you do it for a decade to be like, oh, still bangs and long hair. Got it. Got it.

Which I find some comfort in. It was great. But we just decided like, oh, let's pull the bangs back. And I show up on set to shoot this scene. And it was just an up. And it's not so easy because we had to really. They're short, my bangs. We had to really hairspray them, shellac them back. It wasn't like you could just drop them down and they would look the same. I need bangs. But yes, my forehead is stressing me out. Go ahead.

So I just remember it was like this huge uproar and Nikki got pulled aside and she got spoken to. And I was like, no, no, no, this is me. I wanted to do this and I love this look and it's me. And they were like, okay, fine. Well, this one time, because there was nothing they could do to fix it. And the scene was about to shoot. And they were like, but never again. And it was so, I still don't fully understand it to this day.

I don't know if they thought I'd be so unrecognizable that people wouldn't know it's not Cece or something. I don't know. Yeah.

Yeah, I guess. I just remember I'd forgotten all about it. And then I watched me walk up in the scene that I just remember them having to like delay camera for 10 minutes. So there could be this big conversation about my bangs sticking up versus sticking down. Well, I tell you this, I got face bangs right now. I got mouth bangs. I got this handlebar mustache situation going on. And when I walk down the street, this is not an exaggeration.

People will see me, people who I know, and ask me if I'm okay. Because I just like to take walks and they'll go, you good, bro? Like everything, everything okay? What are you talking about? And they'll just, the way they describe my look is,

Is that of a person who's destitute and down on his luck? And I'm like, my gosh. That's what the mustache does to your whole vibe? I guess so. You look like you live under a bridge? 100%. Me personally, I'm a beard guy. I like my beard. I like it on you too. Thank you. But this mustache, it's been really unsettling. So maybe I see what the network was trying to do. They were like, we don't know. What?

We don't know. Well, they make that joke during this episode about like the loft. She looks like a loft troll usually. And maybe that's what it was. They were like, usually you look like a model on the show, but you look like a troll with those bangs pinned back. Don't do it. Don't show your forehead.

It spins you around. Nobody wants to look at you. Is that the same club that you guys shot the models episode in? No, this was some weird little spot that they did it in and was being doubled for something else at the time, I feel like. And I was like, how are they going to make this work? And they're like, we're just shooting in this one tiny corner to sell it. So, no, it wasn't. That downtown club is like downtown. And I think they only ever booked it if you're going to be there like for...

Like a whole day. Well, I got a funny story about that particular scene. Us being outside and Winston having to cheat in his mind. The weird stare. Me personally, when I cheat in my mind, I don't do weird stares. You know what I'm saying? I like kind of, I'll put shades on.

I like to put a nice pair of shades on. I like to walk down the street. I like to check out what's happening on each side of the boulevard. And they don't know I'm creepy. They can't tell. You know what I'm saying? Here's the thing. Is that true? Do you think there's truth in it that everybody thinks things about other people that they wouldn't want their spouse to know?

I don't think it's about everyone, but I think, you know, there's a statistic that says people think about sex every 16 seconds or something crazy like that. 16 seconds? Yeah. I don't know. Maybe that's just perverts who think about sex every 16 seconds. Who ran this whole perverts of America? We've released the numbers. Yeah.

We pulled 100 people. They're all perverts, mind you. They pulled from the registry. They pulled 100 people on the registry. Anyway, no. So my point is about this particular location. Right. They had a bunch of background actors there. And I see this one person in particular. They said, hey, Lamorne, you have to look at this particular. This is going to be the girl that you look at.

Beautiful girl. Drop dead gorgeous. The reason why I could say that. No, the scene where you look at me is later. No, no, no, no. Are you getting confused? No, no, you didn't have the bangs. You didn't have the bangs. I can't look at her. Her bangs are up. Give me another one. Okay, okay, okay, okay. But the person that I was assigned to look at was an ex-girlfriend of mine. No. And it ended terribly. What?

yeah, it did terribly weirdly, but they had said, oh man, this is the person you have to look at. And I was so uncomfortable. I was so uncomfortable by the end of it though. They, I, I didn't see her in the, I didn't see her in the cut. I didn't see her in the cut. So I was like, okay, it's sort of felt like, yo, how awkward was that? It was very awkward for me. Very, very awkward for me. Um, you know, go to our Patreon and I'll tell you the full story, but, uh,

I can't tell you the full one. Oh, that's like my living nightmare. Yeah. Yeah. It was bad. Wow. And you survived to tell the tale. I did. I did. That's some good tea. Oh, 100%. That was hot and piping. That's hot and piping. Stop talking about Eric Andre. Oh,

MITRE's mission is to solve problems for a safer world. If you have a passion for applied cybersecurity with skills in infrastructure threat intelligence, deterrence technologies, advisal threat emulation, or intelligence analysis, explore the many challenging and fulfilling career opportunities at MITRE.org slash careers. That's M-I-T-R-E dot org slash careers.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living Associates have been committed to creating a vibrant culture and delivering exceptional services, making Brightview a great place to work and live. If you're looking for a rewarding opportunity to serve your local community and grow, we want you to join our team. Brightview Senior Living is growing and actively seeking vibrant associates to join our community teams, including directors, healthcare, activities, hospitality, and dining. Apply today at careers.brightviewseniorliving.com. Equal employment opportunities.

Text BVJOBS to 97211 to apply. Hey guys, Rob Parker here to tell you that the national sales event is on at your Toyota dealer. Making now the perfect time to get the great deal on a dependable new truck like the rugged half-ton Tundra. Combining raw capability with premium comfort and advanced tech to fuel your wildest adventures. Or check out the fully redesigned Tacoma.

delivering trail dominating power and captivating style the new Tacoma was born to make your off-roading dreams come true check out more national sales event deals when you visit buyatoyota.com Toyota let's go places

If you're ready for an epic family vacation, there's no better place than sunny Orlando. Exciting thrills, never-ending food festivals, fresh new dining experiences, outdoor adventures, and Florida's natural springs, and so much more. Orlando has it all. And Visit Orlando's vacation planners can help you plan the perfect trip. In Orlando, anything is possible if you can imagine it. And that's what makes Orlando unbelievably real. Plan your escape today and save at visitorlando.com.

to our show okay so Schmidt is pretending to be Tug Romney by the way one of the laugh out loud lines of this episode is when he says you know what I'm gonna say yeah

Solo tug time. Truly one of the funniest. I should text JJ and be like, who came up with that joke? Because honestly, I was like, I laughed out loud. Solo tug time is so funny. I could have given him any name and I'm like, did you guys name him Tug just for that joke? Because if so, worth it. A thousand percent fully respected. Oh, 100 percent. Have you ever have you ever been mistaken for someone?

You know what? Only once I was mistaken for someone and it was the most surreal thing. I had just moved to L.A. I didn't know anybody. Oh, my God. Barbara Walters? Babs? Is that you? No, I remember. And a friend of mine had also moved down here and he was working for.

Like a big record company. And so he had a little bit of income and a bunch of them were going to Nobu. And I was like, oh my gosh, it's so fancy. I couldn't afford to eat in Nobu. And I, it was just really, he's like, I'll pick you up. And he had like whatever artists that, you know, he was working with at the time and pick me up.

And in a limo, because that's back in the day where that was like a flex, like a prom limo. Yeah. Well, there's a bunch of us. They're picking up. This is like pre Uber. So we all kind of loaded in. Did it have snacks in the back? I don't remember. There's definitely some champs. I love some champs and snacks. I love some champs. So we pull up at Nobu and get out. And I had bangs and I'd pull my hair in a ponytail.

And all of a sudden I get out of this limo and a thousand like flashbulbs go off. And I was like, what? I was like, who's here? So I'm like looking around and they're screaming, Kim, Kim, Kim. And they're like, Kim, Kim Kardashian. And I'm looking for Kim Kardashian.

And I'm like, where is she? I wonder where she is. I don't know where she is. Is she over here? I don't know where she is. And then I realized that they're taking pictures of me. And my friend just grabs my hand and like yanks me inside of Nobu to eat. I remember sitting there being like, oh, she's going to be so mad. Because I am not trying to be.

I don't know why. Maybe she was coming there the same night and they got tipped off and I just happened to get out of a limo and they were like, close enough. Take the picture. It's got to be her. Maybe you have a resemblance. Maybe you have a resemblance. At the time she had bangs. At the time she had bangs and yeah, I guess it was like a close enough situation that they were like, that's fine. And you know what? Years later, I would, in those first few years when I started New Girl, I would often get tagged in Getty as Kim Kardashian.

Oh, wow. So, yeah. So there was a moment where we had a weird crossover. I've never been tagged in her bank account, though. So that's a bit of shame. Well, we got to do something about that. Yeah. Eric. Eric, where you at? I know you know her. Damn. On multiple occasions, I've I've, you know, been this is a real thing. I've been mistaken as that that dude from New Girl. And I just let them. Are you that guy?

Are you that guy? I oftentimes say no. I say no a lot. But no, there's I once let maybe about I want to say maybe about 10 minutes into a situation, met a girl at a bar. She kept she thought that I was Jay Pharoah from now I get mistaken for people a lot. This is the only time I've taken it far. We're at Roger Room, maybe African some bar. And she thought that I was Jay Pharoah and she was talking to me as if I was on Saturday Night Live.

And I just let her do it for a long time. We're having, we're having conversation. I'm talking about Lauren Michaels. I'm talking about like how the writer's room goes and going on and on. And finally I was just like, nah, no, I've never been on SNL. I'm not Jay Pharoah.

It didn't end well. She was very disappointed that I wasn't Jay Pharoah. But that's okay. That's okay. That's okay. But that's the only time. Just to take a pause from the episode just for one second. How do you answer this question when someone goes like, oh my gosh, you look exactly like that guy from New Girl, like Winston. You look exactly like him.

It depends on my mood. I get it all the time. What do you say back? You say I am him or do you say, yeah, I do get that a lot. What do you sometimes if I, if I, if I'm like not in a very talkative mood or if I'm like, or if I'm in a rush or whatever the case may be, I'll be like, I'll be like, Oh yeah, I get that all the time. And then I'll just like smile, laugh it off and keep walking. And then it's like, are you, wait, are you him? And I'll just keep, I'll just keep going. But a lot of times I'll, I'll start the bit by saying, really?

I go, yeah, I get that all the time. People are always like, that handsome dude or that guy who's just so charismatic and charming. And, you know, I think he's the greatest. One of the greatest actors. Yeah. One of the greatest actors of all time, actually. I'll do that bit. And then they catch on that I am him. Right. Because it's a hard one to get out of without making them feel, you know what I mean? Because I would feel embarrassed. I would be like, oh, gosh, wait a minute. You are the person. What have I just said? Yeah.

I got annoyed the other day, though. Someone did it. Someone did that. And they wouldn't stop, though, telling me that I wasn't him after I tried to go. Yeah, it's nice to meet you. And it was like, no, you're not. And then they kept coming back up to me and my friends to, like, complain that I'm not him. And I was like, all right, this is getting old now. I feel like I'm so sorry to disappoint. I am. Oh, she said that on TV, she thought, she's like, I'm shorter.

You know, then I should be. I'm not as charming as I should be. Yeah, I look similar, but much better looking on TV. She was going in and I was like, you go sit your ass down. Get the hell out of my face. This is starting to get weird now.

Speaking of weird, we got to jump back in because I feel like every single time we do a Hannah Lamorne mess around podcast episode, we should just call it like the Hannah Lamorne tangential podcast.

mess around episode. There's no way to stay on track. There's too much to talk about. We're too close friends where we just like, we pop off. That's just how we are. You're really getting insight to not only our friendship, but how we were for like a decade. We could cover 90 topics in 60 seconds and it was like perfect conversation. Goodbye. Okay. Here's the thing. The thing that I really got thinking about with the Winston Shelby storyline. Does sex define a romantic relationship? I, me personally, I don't think it does.

defines it, but it is part of the definition. Right. You know, I think there are multiple things that, um, that, that you have to take into consideration. However, if you are, you are, you know, young, it doesn't even matter. You don't have to be young. If you're physically attracted to people and you have working tools, you know, every once in a while, you, you should put those tools to use and fulfill some, you know, you know, scratch some of those itches. And if you're not, it causes a person to wonder, um,

Why not? If you're not open and communicative about it, about the why not, that's where it could become a problem. Now, there are some people who aren't necessarily that sexually motivated in a relationship. That truly is not part of the definition. It's a bonus. It's a plus. But they both have that understanding of that's what it is. Schmidt, I mean, Winston and Shelby...

They're on two different pages. I don't think it's the sex. I think it's the communication. That's what's going on there. Yeah, that's the thing too. I was watching because you're just watching. You're like, well, this is not about the sex. There's a reason why. Because if you were having it before and then all of a sudden you haven't for close to a month, right? And he wasn't on tour. You know what I'm saying? He wasn't on tour. You want to be like, well, what's changed?

And why don't you? And it seems like they had like they were just incompatible in like their sense of humor. They were incompatible and how they dealt with conflict. They were like all of that stuff. You're just like, oh, that's the thing. So that's just the one thing I love about this show is that they present things and they deal with it on the surface. Like we most of us, especially in our 20s, when you're dating, do like they don't have sex with me. I don't want to be with them. Right. Right.

But then what they do is so smart with the writing. And this is JJ's episode, who's so talented and so wonderful. But they show you those little insights to root causes of the relationships of what's making it work or what's breaking it apart. But they let the characters deal with it like you really would. Right. But they let the audience see these two aren't a really good fit.

Well, yeah, it's foreshadowing. No, you know, we'll talk about that in another time. But what's really under the surface? You know what I mean? Like what's, you know, and it goes back to even in the beginning, why they broke up, why they end up getting back together. Do they actually know each other? There's a lot. There's a lot to unpack there with their relationship. And I think, obviously, if you're a fan of New Girl, you know how it ends.

But, you know, communication is at its core. Yeah. I think if you're not communicating, then who cares if you're having sex or not? Like that's, you know what I mean? There's so many like big meme moments that happens in this episode that I didn't realize they all came from this episode.

Right? Like with Nick banging his head against the pillow, like lying there like a little toothpick and he's banging his head against the pillow. I've seen that a million times. The CeCe line about the Taylor Swift range of emotions means I should come over. I've seen that a million times. I didn't realize it was all in this episode. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. It's a lot of meme-able moments on this show. Meme-able moments. Meme-able moments.

This show is one of the more meme-able shows, I think. Yeah, and I didn't realize it. It's not like Fluffer isn't one that I think about a lot when I think back of my favorite New Girl episodes. But I was like, oh, wow, there's a lot of things that the fans really latched onto and have made these big iconic moments coming off of New Girl.

Another thing. Yes. People ask all the time, you know, cause Nick, Nick, I don't know if this is just the Jake Johnson thing. He loves getting into slap fights on the show. I've been in multiple. He's been in a lot with Schmidt. And what's interesting. I think the script will say, the script will say one person slaps Nick and that's it just to keep them in line. But Jake always goes back and it becomes a whole thing where you're like,

You got heavy knuckles, bro. Like you can't your palms. Your palms are very, very rigid and dry. Like you can't you can't slap my face like that. And Jake loves to and he's not any and he's not he's not careful. You know what I mean? I'm very delicate. Jake is not careful. We get into a slap fight. And yet again.

I have a headache because he is clocking me like aggressively. You know what I mean? So for those out there who are probably wondering, yeah, that shit was real. Yeah, that shit hurt. Here's what's interesting, though, because there's a little bit of what goes around comes around and what you're saying, because later in the series and we'll get to that episode. But it was in, I think, the last season. Right. Maybe. Maybe.

Jake did that with another actor, right? Ooh. Yes. And he got really, really hurt because it went a step too far. Yep. And it was bad. It was bad for everybody all around. It was an accident and everyone felt super terrible. But that's that thing where you're doing physical contact and when you haven't communicated and been clear up front about how light we're going to go. Yeah. Or how heavy we're going to go. Yeah.

Yeah. Somebody's going to get hurt. And it's in our show, in our series, the one person that actually got hurt and had to go see a doctor because of a fight that happens in the show was me. Exactly. And we'll tell you more about that later. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a crazy episode. And you know what's really nuts? And when we finally do that episode, I found this recently. I have a video.

Because I was for that episode, I was standing behind the fake hallway door that's supposed to be like the stairs of the building. So across from the elevator in that hallway, waiting for my cue to come out because I joined the scene at a certain point. And I took a little video through the window because I was like, oh, this is funny.

And it didn't catch the hit, but it caught a lot of other stuff. So I'll drop it when we do that. Yeah, I know. I've never shared it. I should text it to you. I've never shared it with anybody before. Can I turn it into an NFT? World star. Oh, my God. I was like, oh, my gosh.

You got slapped a lot. You got slapped a lot that was not scripted. I'm not okay with that. I'm not, I still, I still, I still have a problem sleeping at night. Um, um, overall with this episode, um, you know, what do we learn about relationships, friendships? You know, did you, did you watch this episode, uh,

Take anything away from it or are these lessons that you've already, because it sounds like, you know, with your Ikea friend, these are some life lessons that you already know. Yeah. I mean, I think that that, which is funny because that was pre-New Girl, that wonderful friendship that I had. But this episode reminded me so much of that stage in your life where you can't ignore anything.

certain signs right and you have to kind of do the hard thing and i just thought they wrote that scene so beautiful of confrontation between nick and jess right where she's like i'm not that you know um and then he's kind of breaking open too and talking about well i am attracted to you sometimes and i'm okay with that actually because i don't actually like have sex with you right intimate with you but i can accept that and then realizing that every relationship

looks different friendship intimate relationships all of them look different and as long as you can both set the boundaries and respect them then that's what works for you right i think that i don't know it was really interesting because i know that so many of us have friends of the opposite sex and you kind of just have to you do have to figure out where the line is yeah

I think so. My takeaway from this thing, from this episode, was that it's okay to cheat. Cheat in your mind. I really was like a big thing for Winston to say to be like, well, everybody or who says it to him? Max Schmidt says it. He's like, everybody does it. That's just normal. Like a human instinct to like fantasize and think about other people. And it's okay. Yeah. It's like.

I think so. I mean, my brain does not work like that at all. Sure. Sure. Hannah just doesn't. Sure. It doesn't. You know me well enough to know it doesn't. When the transport guys show up, a new girl wearing those tight jeans, wearing those Confederate flags on their shirts. You show. No, thank you. No, thank you to everybody. Just no, thank you.

Oh my gosh. That is honestly, if you see me looking at you and my eyes kind of glaze over, it's because like I'm hungry and I'm thinking about like, can I pick up my phone and look at the Postmates app or something? Like there's no, that's not where my mind goes to. There's no...

Yeah. It's all, you know, I'm a child of like the 90s. It's all like stranger danger. I'm not interested in stranger danger. I don't know you. I don't know where you've been. I'm thinking about you doing stuff. Everybody's terrified. Everybody's terrified. Hannah, I got a question for you. Yeah. It's a very serious question. I'm not sure if you've, not sure if you've taken a dive into this episode to understand

Find the bear. Now it's time for Where's the Bear? Where's the Bear? Where's the Bear is brought to you by Hyundai. When it comes to your journey, Hyundai is thinking of every mile. And where's the bear? Where's the bear? Where is the bear? You guys know I hunt high and low every single episode. I will say this season, I'm pretty sure I'm going to need help from a lot of you listening, okay?

because, um, it's hard for me to admit this. You guys know that. But so far in this episode, not being able to find a bear other than the bear on the refrigerator, which I know Zoe thinks is a cop-out, so I don't like going there. Uh, please DM me. Email us. Go on our Instagram. Tell me if you find it, and then I can update everybody. Where's the bear?

Thanks for helping us with our bear hunt Hyundai. Remember, with Hyundai, it's all about the journey. Whatever your destination, they've got the latest tech to get you there safe and keep your passengers entertained along the way. From shopping to buying to owning, Hyundai has your back. Learn more at HyundaiUSA.com. I like this, by the way. I'm googling, like, bear, fluffer, new girl.

And a Reddit thread comes up. New Girl Season 2, Episode 3 review. Fluffer. There's only one sentence. I'm going to show it to you. Thought Winston was great. That's the whole thing. Glad to see my reviews are getting posted. You know what I mean? Finally, people are sharing my shit.

MITRE's mission is to solve problems for a safer world. If you have a passion for applied cybersecurity with skills in infrastructure threat intelligence, deterrence technologies, advisal threat emulation, or intelligence analysis, explore the many challenging and fulfilling career opportunities at MITRE.org slash careers. That's M-I-T-R-E dot org slash careers.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living Associates have been committed to creating a vibrant culture and delivering exceptional services, making Brightview a great place to work and live. If you're looking for a rewarding opportunity to serve your local community and grow, we want you to join our team. Brightview Senior Living is growing and actively seeking vibrant associates to join our community teams, including directors, healthcare, activities, hospitality, and dining. Apply today at careers.brightviewseniorliving.com. Equal employment opportunities.

Text BVJOBS to 97211 to apply. Hey guys, Mario Lopez here to tell you the national sales event is on at your Toyota dealer. Making now the perfect time to get a great deal on a dependable new SUV like an adventure-ready RAV4. Available with all-wheel drive, your new RAV4 is built for performance on any terrain. Or check out a stylish and comfortable Highlander with seating for up to eight passengers and available panoramic moonroof so you can sit back, enjoy the wide open views with a whole family.

Check out more national sales event deals when you visit buyatoyota.com. Toyota, let's go places.

If you're ready for an epic family vacation, there's no better place than sunny Orlando. Exciting thrills, never-ending food festivals, fresh new dining experiences, outdoor adventures, and Florida's natural springs, and so much more. Orlando has it all. And Visit Orlando's vacation planners can help you plan the perfect trip. In Orlando, anything is possible if you can imagine it. And that's what makes Orlando unbelievably real. Plan your escape today and save at visitorlando.com.

We're back and it's time for True American. Ooh, a big question, big game. Here it is. What songs would be on your sexy mix? Triumph by Wu-Tang Clan. Stop it. I can tell you right now, there's a few.

Pony, Genuine. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. So I looked at this list, right, that Joelle had sent, like, of all of the questions and the recap and everything before it came on. And I was like, I don't know what's going to be on my sexiness. I guess Pony by Genuine. Yeah. Yes! Ow! You got to do it. You got to have that on there. But how weird that our brains went into the same thing.

If that song came on, I would be like, I would feel like I was like in a full music video. I'd be like, if a boy played that song, I'd be like, and like, I feel like those like automatic candles would just go and the lights would go and the lights would go and then there'd be like black satin sheets or something. And I'd be like, I'd be like, what?

That song comes on. I'm breaking out the baby oil and I'm humping something. There's an ottoman, a couch. What if you're like, Johnson and Johnson's baby oil? You'll be like, that's like a bag of the classics. Oh my God.

dying that's the only song I could think of yeah but also I would because sometimes you got to slow it down because that's a bit aggressive sometimes you want to romance sometimes you want to lay a person down on that ottoman that you might have been sodomizing yourself I don't know when you're alone you know you find you find a way so if you if you if you

Okay, wait, what's your slow romantic song? A Woman's Worth by Genu. Oh my gosh! A Woman's Worth by Maxwell. Maxwell? I'm not saying I don't have it right now. Yes, just opening. Do you hear all the panties melting across America? I just heard a bunch of dolphins lose their mind. The dogs are howling. Dolphins communicate very well, and I'm a communicator, ladies. Oh my gosh. Oh!

I never realized that you and I are so simpatico in like romantic, sexy music. That's right. That's right. I never knew that in our whole friendship. We'll swap playlists. We will swap playlists. Well, we swapped sexy playlists. It would just be the same mixtape. The same songs. They'd be like, you stole my shit. That would be it. I forgot to give it to you. I still have it in my hand. It's all the songs. No, that's the one I gave you. What?

Did we just become best friends? Yep. All right, you guys. We love you. Thanks for tuning in for this very fun episode. Fluffer learned a lot. Can't believe an ex of yours was in this episode. Hot tea. Oh, yeah. 100%. All right, folks. Make sure you go ahead and like this. Make sure you subscribe to us. Make sure you go ahead and check out our merch. You know, link is in the bio. Have fun with each other, too.

Make sure you look to your neighbor, whether it's your friend or not. Make love to that person with your permission, of course. Yes, of course. You've been listening to Welcome to Our Show, a New Girl Recap podcast. Welcome to Our Show is a production of iHeartRadio, hosted by Zooey Deschanel, Lamorne Morris, and Hannah Simone. Our executive producer is Joelle Monique. Our

Our engineer and editor is Daniel Goodman. The Welcome to Our Show theme song was written by Zooey Deschanel, performed and produced by Zooey Deschanel and Pierre Derrida. Follow us on Instagram at WelcomeToOurShowPod. If you have a question you'd like us to answer, you can email us at WelcomeToOurShowPodcast at gmail.com. Don't forget to rate, subscribe, and share far and wide. Thanks for listening. We'll hear you next week. Welcome to our show.

Am I doing the right thing with my finances? Am I saving enough? Can I buy a house? Am I paying too much in taxes? Will I be able to retire? Putting a financial plan together feels impossible. What if I told you there was another way? Take FACET's free financial wellness quiz to get your score and a snapshot of your current financial health. Visit FACET.com now and discover your financial wellness score today. That's F-A-C-E-T.com.

This ad is sponsored by Facet. Facet Wealth Incorporated is an SEC-registered investment advisor. This is not an offer to buy or sell securities, nor is it investment, legal, or tax advice.

MITRE is investing in a massive AI supercomputer to power a new federal AI sandbox. With AI's potential to drive transformational advances across industries, MITRE's expertise in healthcare, cybersecurity, transportation, finance, climate, and national security will be critical. Transform your career while helping solve problems for a safer world. Visit MITRE.org slash careers. That's M-I-T-R-E dot org slash careers.

Hey, who doesn't love bacon? And did you know Oscar Mayer smokes their delicious bacon for 12 hours over real hardwood? That's a really long time to perfect the smoky flavor and even longer than it takes to go on a long road trip from Chicago to Pittsburgh, stop for food along the way, and still get there while the bacon is smoking. The

The point is, Oscar Mayer takes the best cuts and smokes them over real hardwood chips. There's no wrong way to enjoy it. So buy some Oscar Mayer thick cut bacon now.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living Associates have been committed to creating a vibrant culture and delivering exceptional services, making Brightview a great place to work and live. If you're looking for a rewarding opportunity to serve your local community and grow, we want you to join our team. Brightview Senior Living is growing and actively seeking vibrant associates to join our community teams, including directors, healthcare, activities, hospitality, and dining. Apply today at careers.brightviewseniorliving.com. Equal employment opportunities.

Text BVJOBS to 97211 to apply.