cover of episode The Real Reason You’re Exhausted: How To Gain Control of Your Time & Your Life

The Real Reason You’re Exhausted: How To Gain Control of Your Time & Your Life

2024/11/18
logo of podcast The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Mel Robbins Podcast

Key Insights

Why do people feel the need to constantly stay busy?

People often stay busy to avoid underlying emotional pain, unresolved trauma, or feelings of unworthiness. It's a survival strategy to fill a deep need for connection and validation that was not met in childhood.

Is being productive always a good thing?

While productivity can fulfill intrinsic human needs for accomplishment, it can also become an addiction that harms life balance. Busy people often avoid deeper issues and may not be as productive as they appear.

How does stress become an addiction?

Stress can become an addiction because it triggers the release of endorphins, which provide pleasure and pain relief. This creates a cycle where people seek stress to feel relief from underlying emotional pain.

What role does childhood play in the addiction to busyness?

Childhood experiences, especially how love and value were received, shape our default behaviors. If love was conditional on performance, adults may seek constant busyness to feel worthy and loved, perpetuating a cycle of stress and avoidance.

How can one start to heal from the addiction to stress and busyness?

Healing begins with self-awareness and recognizing the impulse to stay busy. Practicing moments of stillness, like standing in line without a phone, can help reveal the underlying need for distraction and start the process of reconnecting with oneself.

Chapters

Mel Robbins discusses the phenomenon of feeling constantly busy and overwhelmed, especially during the holiday season. She introduces the concept of an addiction to busyness and stress, which she explores further with Dr. Scott Lyons.
  • Feeling constantly busy and overwhelmed is a common phenomenon, especially during the holiday season.
  • The addiction to busyness and stress is more than just a habit; it's a deeper issue related to avoiding internal pain.
  • Dr. Scott Lyons, a trauma expert, explains why over-scheduling and constant stress can keep you disconnected from yourself.

Shownotes Transcript

It’s time to get off the hamster wheel that’s leaving you exhausted and overwhelmed.

If the idea of “doing nothing” feels almost painful and you feel uncomfortable when you’re not busy, this episode is the wake-up call you need. 

Today, Mel unpacks one of the most common addictions that you probably have never heard of before: the addiction to busyness and stress.

Here to give more research and advice is Dr. Scott Lyons, a medical doctor, psychologist, and world-renowned trauma expert. 

Dr. Lyons explains why over-scheduling every second of your day and constantly feeling “not enough” unless stretched to the limit is keeping you disconnected.

By the end of this episode, you’ll have actionable steps to break free from the cycle and regain control of your time, energy, and peace of mind.

For more resources, including links to the studies mentioned in the episode, click here) for the podcast episode page.

If you liked this empowering and insightful episode, listen to this one next: #1 Stress Doctor: 5 Tools to Protect Your Brain From Stress & Feel Calmer Now)

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