Jimmy Kimmel Has BREAKDOWN On National Television After Trump Wins Election!
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Are we ready? Hello, this is Kamala supporter. Oh, hi, Kamala supporter. How are you? Can you hear me? Yes, I can hear you. Can you hear me? This is the I can hear you. This is Kamala supporter. How are you doing? How do you think I'm doing, you fucking piece of shit? I want to die. I just want to lie down and die. But I have to go on living for Kamala.

She would want us to go on because she loves us so much, Jimmy. We are like her children. That's why she didn't have any of her own. So she could be a mother to the nation. And she doesn't want to see her children die, but I want to die so bad. So much. So you're taking it well, I guess, then, huh? Are you? No, I'm not, actually.

Jimmy, this is the worst thing that's ever happened in the world in all of history. We are living through a literal hell on earth right now, and he isn't even sworn in yet. What do you think of a second Trump administration will look like?

Well, first of all, the price of this administration and black and brown bodies will be astronomical. Not to mention the danger posed to LGBTQIA+ and gender nonconforming folks. But especially to prop black and brown bodies, which I find oddly arousing to say out loud. What do you think's gonna happen to them? They'll be murdered! They'll be rounded up and murdered! Oh, come on! That's not gonna happen!

Oh my God, wake the fuck up, dude. Hello. Trump is literally Hitler. I don't know how many times I have to scream that in a crazy person voice before everybody believes me. People voted for Trump because they want to kill these helpless minorities and...

And they want to kill black and brown bodies. No other reason. Really? Maybe the fact that Kamala was essentially anointed by Joe Biden, she was anointed as Joe Biden's successor with absolutely no democratic process. Do you think that might have turned some people to Trump? No, because that makes it like sacred. A magical thing happened.

Kamala just became the nominee right before our eyes. And you think that made people not like her? You're fucking crazy. That was amazing. I cried for days, you idiot. Well, I don't know what to tell you, Kamala supporter. Kamala lost. She failed and it's over. No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't you dare say that. She did not fail.

Oh, brother!

Oh, miss me with that male-centric bullshit. Oh, sister. Either way, I'm inconsolable. Well, I gotta get going, Kamala supporter, but if it's any consolation, you did not fail, actually. You didn't fail. Really? You really mean that? Yes, I do. She failed spectacularly on her own without anyone's help.

Goodbye, Kamala supporter. Oh my God, fuck you and everyone in that room right now and everyone on the planet except for me and my sugar glider who is sick right now. Goodbye. Kamala supporter, ladies and gentlemen.

So my favorite late night show host, Jimmy Kimmel.

He gave a, let's listen, shall we? He's going to have a little bit of a meltdown. Here we go. Let's be honest. It was a terrible night last night. It was a terrible night for women, for children, for the hundreds of thousands of hardworking immigrants who make this country go, for health care, for our clients. Well, you know why he started crying? Because he knows his housekeeper is illegal. And

He's afraid he's going to have to say, anyway, who is it? You know, this is the same guy. He's crying right now, but he did not cry when he wanted to deny hospital beds to people that were sick. Remember that? That's right. It was a good night, though, for actors learning how to fake cry. Anyway, here we go.

Plus, you know he's on Epstein's list. Yes, of course. And Daddy. Yeah, that's, yes, very good, yes. So here we go, here we go. Let's be honest, it was a terrible night last night. It was a terrible night for women, for children, for the hundreds of thousands of hardworking immigrants who make this country go, for health care, for our climate. What fucking health care is he talking about?

Most people, I went bankrupt when I got sick. What healthcare are you fucking? Anyway, here we go. For science...

For science, he said. For science. You know, the science about masks and mRNA vaccines and transmission and contraction and natural immunity is fake. Oh, that kind of fucking science? The bullshit science that you preached on your show every night? That's not called science. That's called big pharma propaganda, you dumb fuck. It's not science. Okay, here we go.

For justice, for free speech. It was a terrible night for poor people, for the middle class. First of all, every night's a bad night for poor people. Like if Kamala would have won, poor people would have been like, yay! He's just upset that Scott Baio has more influence than he does. Okay, here we go. Seniors who rely on Social Security for our allies in Ukraine. Oh! Ukraine! The Ukraine! Oh!

Our allies in Ukraine... Again, that's another... Everything he's saying, we're in opposite day, right? They're not our allies in Ukraine. They're neo-Nazis in Ukraine. Oh, shit. And we're using them as a proxy war against fucking Russia. Yeah.

for our oil companies. That's all it is. That's all it is. Did you see they passed a million dead today in the Ukraine? It's horrible. It's terrible. Yeah. And that was a war that was provoked by NATO and the United States that, by the way, Putin didn't want. He had a peace agreement before it started.

He had a peace agreement immediately after it started and NATO was the ones who stopped that. And they're using, they don't give a fuck. Do you think Biden and NATO and the neocons care about the people of Ukraine? They don't give a fuck about them because that's why they're using them as cannon fodder because they think it could weaken Russia and then they could break up Russia and balkanize it and sell it off to BlackRock the same way they're doing to Ukraine right fucking now.

Well, plus there's all those bio labs owned by the Biden family and the Clinton family and Pelosi's family and all that in the Ukraine where they do a lot of child trafficking down there too. I knew we'd get to the pedo stuff. There we are. It's real. You were wishing I didn't get to it. You study Vietnam.

Why are we going to Vietnam? They told you it was communism. It was really about the golden triangle of heroin. They wanted to go in there and take the heroin. Same thing with Afghanistan. And now this is all about stealing the Ukraine because all this food comes out of the Ukraine. Now you control the food. They sold off half the farmland in Ukraine to BlackRock and State Street already. Now Bill Gates and BlackRock. That's right. Half of America's farmland was sold off to China. Did you know that? And the other half to Bill fucking Gates. Yeah.

Yeah, I know. This is the world we're living in. Democracy is not on the ballot, ladies and gentlemen. Oligarchy and corporatism is on the ballot. And warmongering. That's all that's ever been on the ballot in my entire goddamn lifetime. No shit. Yeah, okay. It's tough to... Let's get back to Jimmy Kimmel crying like a bitch. Bitch thing? Yeah.

And democracy and decency. And it was a terrible night for everyone who voted against him. And guess what? It was a bad night for everyone who voted for him, too. You just don't realize it yet. Hey, I don't want to say that this is embarrassing, but even prisoners who wanted taxpayer transgender surgeries are saying, pull it together, dude.

Anyway, he's crying because it's a terrible night for everybody on Epstein's flight list and Diddy's freak parties. No shit! And he says it's a bad night for women. You mean women on The View? What do you mean? What even is a woman? 100%! Who knows? I don't know. It's a mystery.

People who can't define what a woman are want to regulate misinformation. That's why I know about that. Oh, I know what a woman is. You know, and I... Are they in the room? They're in the room. A woman has double X chromosomes, and I remember that because of pasties. You know, and they have a vagina. But I don't include boobs because there are plenty of dudes with a bigger rack than mine. I'm looking at you, Chris Christie. Ha!

You know what he said? I know what a woman is. Can I tell my joke? Yeah. A woman is me. A woman is somebody whose tits hang down to her knees and who has a prolapsed uterus from giving birth to five ungrateful little bastards that have never had to work for nothing in their whole fucking lives. That's a woman. Rose Ambar for president.

So when Jimmy Kimmel says it was a bad night for children, does he mean the ones in Hillary's basement? Yeah! Come on, am I right? Come on. Or was he talking about one of those batshit mothers bringing their kids to a drag show? I don't know. Anyway, when he says hardworking immigrants, he actually believes that the immigrants being brought here are being brought here in good faith. Yeah!

Like, they're not being brought here so that corporations could exploit them and pay them some fucking livable wages and other cut the wage. Like, he doesn't understand that that's actually what's happening. That's right. Yeah, they're not... We're not... Anyway. Did you see that... Are you going to talk about this? The mayor of New York? Oh, yeah. I was just thinking that. Go ahead. He just said, oh, we're stopping...

for their food, paying for their housing. That's going to cause absolute chaos in New York. It happens right after Donald Trump wins the election. They're like, okay, we're turning off the faucets of these people. Well, they brought him here to

cause chaos yeah you're right chaos always favors the establishment don't forget that they want us be in a in a situation uh situation where we're experiencing chaos so then we beg the establishment for archaic authoritarian rules that will give us some normalcy and we'll give up some of our rights that's right that's exactly what's happening and i think we all agree on this pressure from above pressure from below that's what that's called yes when the politicians you'd

feel like they don't care and on a street level you feel you can't leave your house you just want to beg big government to save you. Thank God you still live in California where we get that. Thank God we live in California where you can come out of the closet but you can't because you live in a tent. Alright, here we go.

He said it was a... Well, don't forget, you've got to say that those children are being sex trafficked, too, to mostly politicians and Democrat donors. Okay. I'm not going to doubt it. I'm not going to doubt it. I call them baby blood drinking Democrat donors. Okay.

If you can think it, they've got a plan to do it. I've said that for a long time. If you can think it, they've already probably planned it or done it. Yeah. Yeah. So when he said that it was a bad night for journalism, what a mother... I can't get... What they just did to Julian Assange, right? Yeah.

The administration he was voting for and pulling for, they just tortured Julian Assange and made him plea to a felony so he could get out of prison. And his felony, what did he do? He committed an act of journalism and revealed war crimes of the fucking war machine. That's journalism? No. He's upset that Donald Trump was rude to Jim Acosta, who's a fucking piece of shit. That's what he's upset about. Right.

Yeah, I think the four people who still work at BuzzFeed are probably devastated right now. Why was it a bad night for journalism? Because everything they've said for the last 12 years has been wrong? You mean that? Okay. Oh, shit. He said it was a bad night for seniors. But I got to tell you, I saw Joe Biden. He looked pretty stoked after this election. Yeah.

Joe Biden might turn out to be the greatest actor we've ever seen, right? I think so. He's like, oh, I'm good, I'm good. I think he won it for Trump. I think so. When he did the garbage comment, I think that certainly helped. Yeah, I think he did it on purpose. I do too, because he hates that. He fucking hates Kamala Harris. Everybody knows he hates her. He didn't want her in the first place. He gave her an office near the furnace in the White House. Yeah.

And you know who was really a bad night for Jimmy Kimmel? It was a bad night for people who still wear masks. That was a bad night for. It was a bad night for DEI consultants. It was a bad night for them. It was a bad night for independent young feminists whose dads still pay their rent. Yeah. It was a bad night for suckers who donated to Kamala. And it was a bad night for gender clowns. That's what it was a bad night for. It was a bad night.

Hamas too. Hamas came out and we're going to talk about this later but Hamas came out immediately and you know what they did? They said hey we want peace. We want to end this shit. And so they know so that's why I was more leaning towards Trump than Kamala because I had a feeling that Trump would figure out a way to bring peace. Of course. So we agree on that? Yeah. So we can disagree on...

Plus, he actually wants to solve the motherfucking problem. That's what I'm talking about. Now, here is the... I mean, in our country. Yeah. He wants to, like, actually help those people that are dying in the streets. Yeah, because...

Apparently there's a homeless industrial complex. Billions and billions of dollars are spent in this state alone. To not solve the problem. Keep them on the streets. Anytime you have an administration that's there to solve a problem, they're not going to solve the problem because then they don't have a job anymore. You know who's killing it right now? Big

tent military industrial complex the people who make tents they're crushing I don't even know they got tents with floors now houses that would be like if I wanted to solve if I wanted to make corporate media better I don't want to fuck it that way there's my incentive to do that I want to let them fucking wither on the vine so I get all the all right

They tried to scare the shit out of us, right? They came up, they said stuff, isn't it weird how much they tried to make it seem like, well here, here's a grifter for the climate change, Josh Fox says, he gets all this money from the Rockefeller Foundation and then he pretends he's an environmentalist. Anyway, he says everyone is right now scheduling meetings and making hair appointments and guitar lessons.

and shit for next week as if it's all gonna be completely normal when in fact it could be utter fucking apocalypse for the world. Please make Wednesday normal and vote Harris. What does he mean by normal? Does he mean, I guess he means more diddy parties? Is that by normal? I think that's what he... Drag queen story hours. Yes. I was wondering if you thought that was billionaire normal or transgender normal. Yeah.

And by the way, you talk about the trans, the drag queen. You know, I like, because when I was a kid, we would go on vacations and we'd go to D.C., Washington, D.C., and we'd go to the presidential library and J. Edgar Hoover would read to us in a sundress. And... Another Wednesday normal. It's the Wednesday. By the way, here is, do you remember this? Oh, God, yeah.

Remember this? Listen to this. He must have moved out by now. Nothing redeemable in him. And we have to... Whoever the people are who want to vote for him, and they look like intelligent people around this. I mean, for some reason, it can't be. It cannot be. If he wins the election...

You won't be on the show anymore. He'll come looking for me. He'll... Well, apparently Bill Maher still hosted his show on Friday. I don't know if you noticed that. Not only that, I mean, this is such an expression of narcissism. He's coming for me. He's gonna come for me. He's gonna round me up. He's gonna come... He's gonna talk about you. He's gonna come for an 80-year-old actor whose best days are behind him. That's what trumps first on his list. It's also

It's also really scary when people have extraordinary talents in one area and got not much else. His whole life he wouldn't do interviews because he knew what a moron he sounded like in an interview. But lately, I don't know what it is, dementia or whatever, he can't stop fucking talking. He goes out in the streets of Manhattan, has fights with MAGA supporters.

And so now he's going to get locked up and Bill Maher's not going to be able to host his show on HBO anymore. Now, he might not be able to if this show becomes popular enough and knocks him off his fucking purse. Let's go! You know, Jimmy...

I don't want to go too... I don't want to scare you, but once again, Roseanne's kind of right. I mean, you can find a ton of articles about this guy getting busted in underage... Child sex trafficking. Yeah, all the time. There's a lot about him. Maybe they will come get him. I was wrong. Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Yeah, so that's the whole thing. That's what Kurt Metzger always says. He's like, oh yeah, he's on the Diddy list and the Epstein list, and that's why he's so shitting. You go, why would he be coming out like this? And Kurt goes, because he's on the fucking list, buddy. He's on the list. Yeah.

I mean, all these people who were talking at Kamala Harris conventions, all ditty-less. You could just tell they were all miserable talking because they knew she was going to lose. They didn't want to be there. But I don't know if they get the call, Roseanne. They're like, hey, go over there now or, you know, we got some photos. I don't know how... It's like, you're up, bitch. Oh, really? Yeah. You know what I say to Robert De Niro? Lock him up!

Lock him up! Lock him up! That's what I say. That's what I say. I mean, dude, when you're that rich for that long, you just have these fucking fantasies, dude. Oh, they're coming after me. Shadow in the cave, it's coming. And that's just where he is right now. He's been rich for so long, since the 70s, he just has weird fantasies where he tweaks his nipples. LAUGHTER

Well, here's Bernie Sanders. Remember what Bernie Sanders, this is what he said before the election. Let's listen to what he said was going to happen. If you believe that climate change is real and an existential threat to our country and the world, you got to vote for Kamala because Trump thinks it is a hoax. And by the way, this is an issue that has not been talked enough about in this campaign. If Trump wins...

The struggle, the global struggle against climate change is over. Well, I'm glad we don't have to worry about that anymore. Hi, Felicia.

I used to think climate change was real, but now I don't have to worry about it. Anyway. Well, you know, you got to look at it like, you know, Obama's pushing climate change as he buys beachfront property. It's like, you're not going to buy property that you know is going to be underwater if you know it's not going to be underwater. Well, unless you need to get rid of your chef or something. Why do you think it's weird that a chef was found naked, drowned in three feet of water? What's the problem with that?

I think he, well I have my opinions but I don't want to shock anybody. Please shock me. Shock me. He went in the bathroom and seen Michelle's dick. Of course. Of course. I bet it's huge.

Did you see that one thing? Oh, I won't say. Go ahead, say it. No, but did you see that one video? Because, you know, I'm on the internet. Where she's dancing on Ellen? 19 hours. Oh, when a wiener was on Ellen? Yeah, I saw that. But no, I'm talking about one.

Obama was on the plane with all those women reporters. Did you all see that when he showed his erection to them? No. It's on there. Look it up. He had his pants on, but he turns around and lift up his leg and put it on the chair and just stand here like, yeah, bitches, get a load of this. And there's all these white women reporters in there like...

Tee hee hee hee hee hee. Oh, lucky hee hee hee hee. And he kept on standing there. And I mean, it was a big old one. And it was down his pants. It's on the internet, y'all. Look it up. I did not see this. He was on the Air Force One.

I did not. Well, talk about your Air Force One. Am I right? Yeah, it was like, and he was doing it on purpose. That's a heat-seeking missile. Am I right? Come on. So here is Charlemagne the God. Oh my God, I can't see. If you want to get something done, Roseanne, you go straight to Charlemagne the God. You don't get stuck dicking around with Charlemagne the regional manager.

Here he is making an interesting observation about how opposition theater works, right? So let's watch. Here we go. I will say this. I'm glad everybody's having a sense of optimism because the reality is we have no choice. So he's talking about how now, after Trump has won, everybody's trying to be optimistic. They're giving speeches saying, don't worry about it. The world isn't over. Things are, we got to go on. We need to keep fighting. It's going to be okay. Even Joe Biden...

They're all saying it's going to be okay. And he was like, wait, what the, that doesn't sound like what you were saying before. Here it is. Here it is. We'll say this. I'm glad everybody's having a sense. We have no choice because we're here now. Donald J. Trump is going to be the 47th president of the United States of America, like it or not. And we all hope for the best for this country. That's all we can do. But don't y'all find it strange that now that he's won, they're not calling him a third of democracy?

They're not calling him a fascist. I mean, damn, on Monday. They're not calling him anything. They can't. On Monday, they were just calling him that. I would think that, you know, if you really believe that, then somebody's speech would be about how America effed up and how things are about to be really bad. He's the most powerful man in the world now. It just makes you wonder how much of it did they really believe or how much of it was just politics.

It makes you wonder how much of it they really believed and how much of it was just propaganda. It was all propaganda. That's why. We already lived through four years of Trump, and we know what he did then. He didn't do any of that shit. He didn't block up his political opponents. They did that. He didn't do any of that. Go ahead. Well, you know, I mean, watching this video, I'm already ready to...

a vote for a black woman. His co-host is talking and putting on makeup at the same time, which is more than Kamala Harris could do. She would be a better candidate. So, I mean, remember when Kamala Harris was interviewed by Stephen Colbert and Stephen Colbert asked her... He's on the list, too, both of them. He's definitely on the list. He's Podesta's friend, for sure.

And he asked Kamala Harris, hey, wait a minute, you called Joe Biden a racist during the debates. How could you possibly run as his vice president? And she just kept saying, it was a debate. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Meaning, I was lying. That's what she said. I was lying. We always lie to get elected. And that's what Charlemagne looks like. Look, that's the sad face. Like, oh, they're always lying? I didn't buy them anything. Ha, ha, ha.

Because he was one of those, right? He repeated their lies. Joe Biden came on his show and said, if you don't vote for me, you ain't black. The guy who passed the crime bill, which is why black and brown people are locked up at higher rates than their population, and he fucking let them get away with it. Donald Trump does the First Step Act, which actually allows black and brown people out of fucking jail, and then he lets them come back four years later.

years later and say the same goddamn shit. That's what's fucking crazy about Charlemagne. The God, he's Charlemagne the gullible. Did you see when Larry Elder went on there? Larry Elder's a white supremacist. You know that.

Did you see when Larry Elder went out there and said that was your Negro wake-up call? I did see that. Larry Elder fucking spanked him hard. Yeah, he did. That was awesome. It was pretty awesome. Yeah. And he didn't have a comeback for it. Yeah, I did see that. Anyway, I wanted to show you that. So it's like after the election, Charlamagne's like, hmm, we're all lying about that.

Really? They're not going to put us in camps? No, they're not going to put you in camps. What they're going to do is try to end the wars and have a decent economy and seal the borders so we can have a fucking country. And that's all they're going to do. Really? No, no, no, no, no.

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So here's what they're really afraid of. They're really afraid of RFK getting control of some of the government, especially that has to do with our health. And here he is talking to Tucker about what he's supposed to do in the Trump administration. Let's listen to it. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What the fuck is that picture? Is that Tucker in a tennis sweater over his head? What is that? No, they're at Mar-a-Lago and it's Trump. That looks like Trump. They're at Mar-a-Lago, I think. That's Trump. Okay. Okay. Oh, it's Trump.

And that is the best Trump. He's got... -80s Trump was fire. -80s Trump, yeah. Here we go. When you say, "If I'm given this job," can you be-- for people who aren't following this, can you be more specific about what job you're talking about? Well, President Trump has asked me to-- he's asked me to do three things. He's asked me, in terms of the public health agencies,

He's asking, number one, to get rid of the corruption, rid of the conflicts, the agency capture phenomena that has turned these public health agencies away from public health. And their principal objective now is to advance the mercantile interests of the pharmaceutical companies. And he wants to get rid of, number one, get rid of the corruption. Number two, return these agencies to the gold standard

scientific research and evidence-based research, empirically-based science that they, when you and I were kids, they were famous for around the world. They've lost that reputation now because they've been captured by industry. And then number three, to end the chronic disease epidemic. And President Trump has told me he wants to see concrete, measurable results within two years. And I promised him that I could do that.

Now, whether that means as an HHS secretary or whether it means as a health czar within the White House, we haven't figured out yet. But one way or another, we are going to end the chronic disease epidemic. Yes, that's what I say. You will be the health czar and he will get that fucking job done.

I guarantee it. Yeah, I think so too. Why would anybody have a problem? Why would you have a problem with that? What is wrong with people? I'm just hoping this means that we no longer have to ask our doctor about medication. Shouldn't that be their fucking job? Ask your doctor if it's right for you. What? Shouldn't my doctor know if this is right for me? Why am I asking my doctor?

It's all talk like to say like three out of four people suffer from diabetes and they don't know it. Well, if you know it, why don't you fucking tell them? So, um...

So here's what he says. The FDA's war on public health is about to end. This includes its aggressive suppression of psychedelics, peptides, stem cells, raw milk, hyperbaric therapies, chelating compounds, ivermectin, hydroxychloroquine, vitamins, clean foods, sunshine, exercise, nutrition, and anything else.

Yeah! Awesome!

It's just truth, right? He knows how to do this, too. He's an expert. He's done this, yeah. No, not just this. He's taken on regulatory agencies before and won. Yeah, won. Destroyed. Yeah. This will happen. This is the reason why the Hudson River's cleaned up. Correct. That was a shit show, and now it's one of the cleanest bodies of water in the country. It's him. It's him. This is the first time I've ever known, had a friend who is a personal friend of a presidential candidate,

And this person has no reason to lie to me. And they're like, he's the nicest guy. He's the most real dude. I've been working with him. I've been working with him very closely. And like he's, the guy you see talking is the, that's the real guy. Yeah, 100%. I interviewed him and I was like entranced with him. Because, you know, I didn't know what to expect. But man, he was on it. I tried to throw him with like, yeah, Project Monarch. And he knew every, all the conspiracy shit. He knew all of it. Did you send him nudes afterwards? Huh?

Because that's what female interviewers do. Oh, that one lady? Yeah. But I told my son, I go, I almost had a sex urge. I did. That's all gone. Make Roseanne horny again. Uh-huh. That's called make Roseanne horny again. I think that's what that is. It'll never happen, but it threatens...

It threatened there like a little... Well, by the way, back to this story. This guy is an assemblyman in New Jersey, right? And he said... This happened. He said, sources tell me top five CEOs of pharmaceutical companies are holding an emergency teleconference at 1 p.m. A lawyer has confirmed that everyone is in a state of panic. And that was the day after the election. And you know what? Yeah!

They were all on Xanax. Yeah, I think they have, actually, I think they have a pill for that. Isn't it great to think that they're scared? Yes, yes, it is great. It is a great feeling. Well, you know, just today, Kansas came out and they're suing Pfizer. Well, yeah, Kansas is suing Pfizer. Yeah.

So let's say... We've had enough of their shit. And by the way, the misogynist tapped a woman, amazingly, for chief of staff. So you're telling me Trump is hiring a female to be his chief? So all his supporters must be pissed. Because they're misogynists, right? That's what a misogynist he is. He wants to be the first one to fire a head chief of staff as a female. That has to be what that is.

By the way, he also hired the first female head of the CIA who used to be a torturer, but you gotta bring some eggs to make an omelet. And she shattered that glass ceiling and then she picked up one of those shards of glass and started torturing someone. All I'm saying is he's pro-women. That's all I'm saying.

I like that he's bringing people from the outside. We need more of that RFK Jr. Because, you know, you're like, oh, I'm going to get rid of the swamp people. But if you're in a swamp, you're only surrounded by swamp people. And you take out one swamp person, another swamp person just...

It pokes her head up. So it's very interesting. There's this thing I would love if everyone... I'm not going to talk long, but it's called the Spars Pandemic Simulation. And you guys should study that because it's basically role-playing a lot of stuff. And one thing it talks about is everyone gets so crazy, they throw somebody under the bus, which...

they allude to as Fauci. But then what's going to happen, they say, is that the pharmaceutical companies are going to start a giant fund and everyone's going to sue them. They're going to drain the fund. And then according to this simulation, the U.S. government fills the fund up again. So watch for that because, you know, this thing's gotten everything right so far. So it's something to check out. What simulation? It's called the Spars Pandemic Simulation.

Okay, we will thank you very much for pointing that out. Fucking maniac who's making shit up. All right, here we go. Hey, look for the julep configuration. Everybody look that up. Just fucking look it up. And...

No, anyway, here, uh, Trump's one of Trump's transition team managers went on CNN to talk about Bobby Kennedy's role. And here's what happened. Tristan is RFK Jr. He said that Trump has promised him control of the public health agencies, HHS, which would be also, you know, CDC, FDA, USDA, all of these agencies. Is that true? Has Trump promised him basically the HHS job? So I spent, uh,

Two and a half hours this week with Bobby Kennedy Jr. And it was the most extraordinary thing, because let's face it, we've all heard on the news all sorts of sort of snarky comments about him. And I said, so tell me, how's it going to go? And he said, why don't you just listen to me explain things? And what he explained was when he was born, we had three vaccines.

and autism was one in 10,000. Now a baby's born with 76 vaccines because in 1986, they waived product liability for vaccines. And here's the best one. They started paying the people at the NIH, right? They pay them a piece of the money for the vaccine companies. Wait a minute, let me finish. And so all of

All of these vaccines came out without product liability. So what happened to autism is one in 34. OK, neither of us are doctors. Vaccines are safe. OK, I mean, OK, neither of us are doctors, but I can say vaccines are safe because I'm a newly hired anchor on CNN.

What the fuck? Neither of us are doctors, but guess what? I'm going to pretend like I am and just say that. And go ahead, Dr. Drew. You're a doctor, aren't you? I am. You're not like Dr. Dre doctor. You're like a real doctor. Go fuck yourself. Is it Dre? Is it Dre? So they...

He's not representing the real core issue. The way RFK says it, and I think it's exactly correct, which is he just thinks vaccines should go through the same process of review as any other medication. They don't have placebo double-blind studies, right? The standards are totally different than for all the other things I'm allowed to advise you to put in your body. There's nothing.

Right. Completely different standard. Yes. Just bring it up. For babies. For vaccines. Let's bring it up to the standard. They don't do that because they say it would be unethical to do that, correct? Unethical was the old thing. I used to hear, well, vaccines are lost leaders. They would never be able to make vaccines. It would be too expensive and they don't make any profit on them anyway. This is what I was really...

Yeah, so what I say, I remember when I'm like, well, if I get myocarditis, I'm going to sue. And they go, you can't sue because they passed a law saying if you get injured by a vaccine, you can't sue. And I'm like, well, why would they pass a law like that? And they said, because it's safe.

Well, why would they need liability shield from lawsuits if they were all fucking safe? They wouldn't have to worry about lawsuits. Why would they be so worried about lawsuits or unforeseen consequences if they'd studied it properly? That's right. And they haven't. No, they haven't. No. Okay. That's like them saying we should make the law to make it illegal to have voter registration. What are you, racist?

Just because they have them in India and every Latin American country in Africa, everywhere else in the world in fact, except here, that doesn't mean you're not racist, right? Come on. I hate everybody. So here is Morning Joe Ball and this guy who's got those ozempic face and... Yeah. Bobblehead? Oof, boy.

And listen to how goddamn racist they are at MSNBC after the minorities don't vote the way they want them to. Listen to this. Here we go. I just say really quickly, too. Democrats need to be mature and they need to be honest and they need to say, yes, there is. There's misogyny.

But it's not just misogyny from white men. It's misogyny from Hispanic men. It's misogyny from black men. Things we've all been talking about who do not want a woman leading them. Might be race issues with Hispanics. They don't want a black woman as president. You know, the Democratic Party, I've always found when you're sitting around talking, they love to just sort of.

balkanize everybody into these separate groups. Like I'm doing right now. Oh, white people don't like women and black people. No, it is time for the Democrats to say, okay, and you and I have talked about this before.

A lot of Hispanic voters have problems with black candidates. Right. And with other Hispanics. And some that don't like each other. And some of the most misogynist things I've heard going on this Get Out the Vote tour came from black men. I mean, misogynist things. So you're absolutely right. It's not simplistic. And we've got to have real honest conversations about it. Real honest conversations.

Yeah, we got to have honest conversations about why this guy's still on the fucking air. I think that's what our conversation is about. And I don't, I'm confused. You know, I'm confused watching this interview about Al Sharpton. I mean, I don't know if I'm being misogynistic towards him because he looks like an elderly black woman or if I'm being racist because he's black. I'm not sure exactly what.

How about that? He's a fed. How about that? Came out, he was an FBI informant. Like, no one cares. How do you think he got that job at MSNBC? You think you get that because you're a radical black activist or because you're serving the fucking deep state and the FBI? That's exactly how he got that job. And since we're being honest about Latinos, can we talk about leaf blowers? Am I right? Come on. Come with us. Come with us. These people don't know what you're talking about.

I like, can I do my Joel Scarborough impression? Yeah. Hey, it's not just white men who are misogynistic. I was just telling my property, I mean my wife, it's also Latinos. You know, this is the most progressive KKK meeting. I haven't seen a white and black man agree about minorities this much since Leo DiCaprio and Sam Jackson in Django. Am I right?

You know, sometimes things hide in plain sight. Tell me Mika's not a Russian operative. If you were casting a Russian spy in a movie and watched her during this interview, it's spooky. Imagine if they were saying that shit on Fox News or anything. They would want to get rid of their advertisers. They'd want them to platform them.

But since it's MSNBC and Al Sharpton, they're like, oh yeah, that makes sense. Hispanics are racist pricks and black guys ain't fucking women. We all know that shit. You know?

I learned in recovery, when you go through all your resentments, you kind of go through those, you find the one common denominator is yourself. And I'm listening to them blame everybody but Kamala Harris. It's like, at some point, if everyone's voting for everybody else, it might be the candidate, and it might not be blatant hatred and racism.

Am I remembering this correctly? Scarborough was a congressman. He was a Republican congressman. Yes, right. And now he fits right in with the shit-libbed Democratic needle guy. No, no, it's his wife. She hypnotized him. She's a Russian operative. She got this whole thing going. It's kind of crazy how when you find a dead, pregnant intern in your office, you're like, oh, shit. Right?

They got pictures. Everybody on TV, they got blackmail on or they won't be on TV. Oh, please, come on. Don't ditty me that riddle. It's true. The only reason they're on is because they're all blackmailed. I wouldn't doubt. Of course. Or they willingly sold out and took... I don't think anybody willingly go on MSNBC. So...

I mean, what did they have on Brian Williams? Because you don't see him anymore. Yeah, he's gone. He's done. What did he do? I mean, Mika's dad is like one of the biggest warmongers of all time. Yeah, ever. Isn't that Brzezinski? Yeah, now she's there. It's just like, it's so crazy. You go, oh man, hard work gets me where I've got to go. No, dude, your dad's a warmonger. And now you're just spitting out everybody's hate. Oh,

all the brown hate out there when your dad killed all these Arabs. And they had Donald Trump on their show all the time. Remember? They used to have Trump on all the time. They were best friends. They would call in the morning. That's right. And I love how they tell you why they hate Donald Trump now. Because he's a big liar. Oh. If you think the establishment hates a politician because he went to Washington, D.C. and started lying, I've got a vaccine I'd like to sell you. Ha ha ha ha!

I remember one thing Trump said about her that cracked me up, because you know how he says stuff. Because he's kind of a comic, too. Yeah, he is. But he said, he goes, him and her, they came down to Mar-a-Lago there, and she had her nose all bandaged up. I guess she just had surgery or something. Yeah, she had face surgery. She had a rhinoplasty, and he was making fun of how her wounds were leaking. That's what he said. Yeah.

Yeah, he went right after the jugular.

I saw you had a guest on, I think, today or yesterday, and they're talking a lot about January 6th. Now, I sniffed that out pretty quickly as a FBI psyop. You know, when Christopher Wray, the head of the FBI, was asked, point blank, did you have FBI assets dressed up as MAGA supporters inside the Capitol before the riots started? And he said, I can't answer that question. Well, that was it. I knew exactly...

And I knew that half those people showed up because they were pissed off about an election they thought was stolen, just like the other half of the country thought that Russia stole an election for four years. And they showed up to protest, and they didn't know it. Really, they were trying to overthrow the government, a bunch of guys in pajama bottoms and buffalo helmets.

I'm gonna go to Nancy Pelosi's office and take a shit. That's not a coup, that's a poo, okay? And half of those people got pushed in to the Capitol by the FBI plants in the crowd, and the other half got let in by the cops who took the fences away. And I know that because I saw it on your show. I saw the video. Those cops did everything except erect a bouncy house inside the Capitol.

For the protesters. And so tell me, so if that was an FBI setup, and we have, by the way, video, Mike Benz talked about it on my show of Nancy Pelosi saying they've now trespassed on federal land. That's exactly what we wanted. So, of course, this was a setup. And so why is that important? And what does it mean?

Well, it's important because it shows that the most publicized crime since 9-11 was fake. I mean, like the war in Ukraine, which was effectively started by the Biden administration prodding Russia with threats of including Ukraine and NATO, prodding Russia to invade Ukraine. It's the opposite of what they tell us. Oh, it was an unprovoked war. Okay. It was the opposite of that. You provoked the war.

January 6th was not an insurrection. No, it was an op where Nancy Pelosi and others, I would say on a bipartisan basis, use the outrage of Trump voters who thought the election was stolen. People actually believe in the Constitution. Maybe they're wrong. I mean, tell me how they're wrong. We could have a debate. But these were not insurrectionists. These are people trying to defend the system they grew up in. They believe in democracy, unlike Liz Cheney.

And they were painted as sort of the dangerous extremists. They were all unarmed. It was like an inordinate number of 65-year-old diabetic grandmothers with two bankruptcies. Ashley Babbitt was a pool cleaner.

And a U.S. military veteran, an Air Force veteran, who was barely over five feet tall, unarmed, shot to death by Michael Byrd, who was a Capitol Police officer with a documented history of reckless behavior with a firearm. And there's no investigation into it. He's not censured. No. You know what happened to Michael Byrd? He got...

government-funded bodyguards to protect him at home because he was the victim of hate because people ask questions like, are you allowed to just shoot unarmed women now without even explaining why you did it, without even pretending there was a physical threat to you? He didn't even pretend it. She was standing on the other side of the door. He murdered her, and everybody in Washington, almost every single member of Congress, almost 435, Republicans as well, said, thank you, Michael Byrd, for protecting us. This woman got murdered.

I mean, you may hate her politics. You may hate her. You're not allowed to murder people. And no one's allowed to murder people. And the government especially is not allowed to murder people. And they just kind of let it, I mean, to this day, no one will talk about it.

Her mother showed up on the Capitol to protest her daughter's murder and she was promptly arrested for jaywalking. I'm not making this up. You can find the video online. So you just realize the whole point of this exercise is to usher in a police state. If I'm wrong, tell me how. But clearly that's what the point is. And rather than do it in a straightforward way,

where you just like dress up in a black uniform and beat me with a truncheon. I mean, that's bad, but at least I know what's happening. You do it in this feminized passive aggressive way where you enslave me and then lecture me about being immoral. There's something about it that I can't tolerate it because it's too feminized for me. I'm a man. And I believe if you're gonna attack someone, say, I'm going to attack you and then punch him in the face because we both know what's going on. What I don't believe in is shooting someone and then claiming you're the victim.

shooting an unarmed woman and then claiming you need protection because you're under attack. I can't deal with that. I mean, that's too dysfunctional for me. It's too dishonest.

I agree. And, you know, I've had this conversation with many people, famously with Cornel West on my show, when he said that Donald Trump was a fascist and Joe Biden wasn't because Donald Trump tried to overthrow the peaceful transfer of power on January 6th. And I was like, really? A bunch of Second Amendment gun nuts showed up to overthrow the government. And son of a bitch, they forgot their guns. Isn't that what I bet they were embarrassed?

I really, hey Mike, you got the guns? No, I brought mittens. Oh, shit. So I, what do Cheney and Kamala Harris have in common? - Oh, everything, everything. You know, a worship of violence. I mean, for years I defended Cheney. I know Cheney. I've been hunting with Cheney more than once. - Ooh, dangerous. - Watch out. - That was dangerous. - No, no, I actually know, I literally have been.

You're a survivor. So I just want to, I'm only saying that obviously not to brag, but just to say this is a world that I'm very familiar with and a world that I spent an awful lot of time defending over the years. To my shame, I'm repenting of that now in a heartfelt way. I'm ashamed that I did that.

But my conclusion is that a lot of the criticism aimed at Cheney originally was right, that this is a person who spent his life in the federal bureaucracy without risking anything, of course. And bureaucracies of all kinds, particularly ours, reward kind of feline behavior, you know, kissing up and pissing down. They reward the most dishonorable kind of behavior.

And people who spend their lives in them wind up in kind of a Walter Mitty state of mind where they imagine that all the kind of disgusting infighting they're doing is actually noble. And they transfer this desire for heroism onto the rest of the world in the form of war. In other words, like if you're if you're Tony Blinken and you're clearly a guy who has no respect at all from his own wife because no woman could respect Tony Blinken. How do you compensate for that?

Well, you just kill a lot of people. And then you feel like, well, I'm Winston Churchill now. I'm a hero out of history. And clearly that's going on with Dick Cheney. And clearly it's going on with Kamala Harris. And I think it's one of the reasons famously that she put all those black dudes in jail for smoking joints or whatever she did, because it made her feel like, you know, I'm tough now, I'm strong. But the truth is it doesn't make you strong to hurt the helpless, the defenseless at all. It makes you cruel. It makes you a bully. It makes you a contemptible figure. You know, strong people are,

You know, you got a problem with me? Like, let's, you know, throw down your weapon and let's fight. I mean, that's what the honorable response is. But people like Dick Cheney or that mustachioed creep who Trump has that is National Security Advisor John Bolton, guys like that, I mean, they've never been to war. I mean, they are the classic definition of chicken hock. They've never been in a fistfight before. They have no appreciation for the cost of violence.

And so they inflict it. And Liz Cheney is out of a movie that way. And I will say, and I'm gonna say something controversial, you'll probably disavow me, but I just noticed it, that my whole childhood, I heard growing up in Southern California, that we need more women in leadership because they'd be more reasonable and more peaceful. They'd be conciliatory, they'd be the mother figures. And I thought that sounded right to me. I was not against that at all.

But in effect what we've seen is the most bloodthirsty people on the national stage are not exclusively women, but they're disproportionately women. They are. I don't know what that's about. No, I'm serious. Wait, wait, wait. Tucker, what about women with dicks though?

- Well that's, you know, they're probably, honestly I think Bruce Jenner's probably a little bit less likely to send you to war than Toria Newland. - Very reasonable woman, very intelligent, very strong woman. - They didn't say it was-- - No, it's true. - They didn't say it was-- - Like what is that, why doesn't someone account for that? Like why is it, every time I look around at someone in the Congress,

you know, the most blood victorious sparts or whatever, Republican, you know, the women who were like, the members who were the most excited about sending some grotesque new killing device, cluster bombs to Ukraine, they're women. Like, what is that? Again, they've never been in a fistfight, guaranteed. They have no experience of violence whatsoever.

- As someone who has had his ass kicked twice, I've had two black eyes 'cause I got drunk and threw the first punch. And twice, both times, I got crushed because I was the aggressor. And what did I learn from that? First of all, I better quit drinking, which I did. And the second thing I learned from that is don't pick fights. Actually, you get your ass kicked. - Time for a rematch. - I didn't want to hit you with a black eye twice. Yeah, you learn something from that. - Well, I figure these people thought that way when they started saying words are violence. And I was like, oh, you have not experienced any violence.

But they're violence worshippers themselves. They're into violence. It makes them feel powerful. It makes them feel like God. It's the anime. That's right, man. As my friend Keaton Weiss said last weekend, Kamala Harris' whole life, well, first she had an affair with Willie Brown, and then she married Doug Emhoff, and then now she's slaughtering children in Palestine. Her whole life has been one game of fuck, marry, or kill. And

That's great. Here's my thing about the Democrats and any of them is that it's not natural. It's like, as a liberal, you...

you mostly want to help on a street level. Like most liberals don't want to run for power and get very high up. Same thing with women. Not that women don't want to run businesses, but they tend to be our nurses and their care for people. There's a certain type of psychopath that wants to get that high. That isn't normal. Nobody at that level is normal.

That's such an insightful point. Thank you for saying that. You're absolutely right. That answers my question, actually. That it's not that women are more for violence. I don't think that they are. No woman in my life is for violence, that's for sure. It's the women who ascend to positions of political authority. Man, they are disproportionately warmonger lunatics. Hey, become a premium member. Go to JimmyDoreComedy.com. Sign up. It's the most affordable premium program in the business. Freak out. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't.

Don't freak out. Don't freak out. All the voices performed today are by the one and only, the inimitable Mike McRae. He can be found at MikeMcRae.com. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. That's it for this week. You be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me. Don't freak out. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't freak out. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't.

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