Local Hour: Jessica's Most Correctest Take
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Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadowing it. Shadowing it.

This is more what I'm going for sonically, but this isn't perfect either. I want the sound of the idea of us trickling in. I want... Jess is putting makeup on me right now. We're not quite ready to start the show, but we're here and we're intimately talking to the people who have gathered as we're trickling in. This is a little loud. Okay.

It's less haunting than last week's sound. Unfortunately, this is a bummer, but Stu Gatz and Billy aren't here today because they just crushed it in Arizona. God bless football. Barkley showed up. It was a giant party. It was great fun. But they're flying back. That's the bad news. The good news is Greg Cody is here. He is ready. He is clean. He looks better and healthier than I have seen him look in a long time.

in about 10 years. Wow. He looks ready at the start of a work week, and I feel like he could do a straight four live hour show because there's so much to talk about. Yeah, there really is. I could. I could.

I don't want to steal your thunder, though. We're going to go straight. We're going to go as hard as we can into Greg Cody's wheelhouse today because there's so much to talk about, not the least of which is inner Miami, because I know you and Mike are going to have thoughts on that. Izzy's around here somewhere. Jeremy's on strike outside. Tony's in Coconut Grove. We're all over the place. And Jessica and Lucy can't stop talking about that Auburn plane fight.

I want to know what you would start with today. If you were starting the show, what would you start with in football? If I only gave you not just football in general, but I tell you, you got it. What's the what's the story today?

I don't know that it's that unequivocal, right? But if I asked you to pick because you were hosting a show on a Monday and you were starting a show. Hypothetically, of course. Hypothetically, if I'm asking you how you would start the show today with a national and international audience, and I tell you it can't just be football in general. Isn't football great? Right.

Okay, if it's an international audience, I'm going to go with Messi and Inter-Miami. I'm going to go with football with a U. It's our audience. Yeah. It's our audience. Yeah, I think Messi losing in the first round.

And it's that as much as inner Miami losing in the first round is a huge story in American soccer and American sport. So you would open with football? Football. The real football is what you would open with? Yeah, the international sport. The true international sport. Chris Cody, if I tell you one story from yesterday, one football story from yesterday, what would you be leading with? I mean, Lions-Texans was fun. Last thing you saw?

I mean, that was the best football game. I don't think it was. There was a lot of good football played this weekend and a lot of close football, like an amazing amount of close football. Mike, what would you start with? From Sunday. Well, no. Well, you said from yesterday. Well, you can go ahead. You can choose whatever you want, actually. If you start with Miami football...

I was going to go with Pitt's devastating and embarrassing home loss to the Virginia Cavaliers. That call on the fourth down, what did you think of that? It's a lot of crazy calls. I don't know if you saw Utah's athletic director, but he's unhinged. I did see that. But I thought the Virginia Pitt thing was slightly worse because the explanation from the refs was just sort of non-statement. I had it on mute, but just from where I was sitting, bad loss. Can't lose those games.

The Utah athletic director thing is not something I've seen before. A post-game press conference where all of a sudden the AD appears and says things that you never see a coach say. Can we play that sound, please, even though we're not technically on air yet and we're just trickling in? Can we play the sound of the Utah AD? And incidentally, I don't know how BYU won that football game. Like, BYU.

Utah just stopped scoring in the second half. The athletic director has an idea. All right, let's play that sound. For 12 years, this game was absolutely stolen from us. We were excited about being in the Big 12, but tonight I am not. We won this game. Someone else stole it from us. Oh, please. Very disappointed. I will talk to the commissioner.

This is not fair to our team. I'm disgusted by the professionalism of the officiating crew tonight. One of the greatest things in all of sports that I always want with my sports is something that ends with, I will talk to the commissioner. This is very like mom goes to Starbucks, has a bad experience, and then writes it on Facebook. Like the exact same vibe.

You guys seen an athletic director do this before? In the heat of a Saturday, not like the next day or a press conference where there's a national scandal. Right after the game, hey, everyone in the country, you're going to know this athletic director's voice and face.

that you never thought of before because he's going to be out here saying things you haven't heard before if they just stole the game from us. It just seemed outsized. Correct me if I'm wrong, Lucy, but they're new to this conference. And yeah, I watched some of the game. Again, not with sound on. It looked like they had reason to be upset about a couple of calls. I think in a vacuum, if you see the holding call that everyone was a little mad at,

It wasn't so bad. You can understand why they made that call. It just seemed like a really outsized reaction from the AD, which led me to believe that maybe he's doing this with purpose in a new conference. BYU had to drive like 55 yards down the field after that. So it's kind of one of those things where I'm like, you know, don't put yourself in a position where the refs are controlling the outcome of the game, but get a stop. Get a stop. I know, but I...

Don't put yourself in the position where the refs are controlling the games. All of these games are being decided by nothing. Like all the games we're watching on Saturdays and Sundays are being, it's not all Alabama LSU. There's two things that change a call and now everyone's throwing shit on the field. Now, because that's the popular thing, because the calls are hugely important because everyone's closer than they've been. Go ahead and name all the college football teams that aren't flawed. FSU. FSU.

They're perfect. This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugatz Podcast. Today's episode is sponsored by DraftKings. Stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show. DraftKings, the crown is yours. I'm frustrated and I'm sorry. There's too much going on. I don't know where to start the show.

I don't know where to place sunlight in the eyes of the Cowboys. In the Cowboys, Babe Laufenberg gave a stat that I couldn't believe. And I love that name, Babe Laufenberg. Do any of you know or remember Babe Laufenberg? If Valerie and I had a pig, we would call it Babe Laufenberg. That would be its name. Babe Laufenberg reports that the Cowboys have now trailed by 20-plus at home in five straight games. It's never happened before.

And that's like the 40th best story of the weekend in sports. I've got so many stats for you guys, and I don't know where to start the show, but I feel like I should start it with Jessica because she's ready to declare the Chiefs officially annoying. And they win yesterday and had no business winning that football game. There's a pass. We analyze this sport so much. Mahomes drops back to pass and just floats it out to his running back, doesn't see Mahomes.

That Zach Allen is standing there, number 99, and just throws it right at his face mask in the red zone and hits him in the hand. And Zach Allen will remember that the rest of his life. He will never have an easier interception. Give me all his stats, Chris. Zach Allen's stats on how often he gets to hold the football. And it's an interception.

And it should be an interception, but it's not an interception. And the Chiefs win their 15th game in a row in that sport where all the games are close. And look at this stat here, because this is crazy. Mahomes down 10 plus in the second half has a better career winning percentage than quarterbacks named Phillip Rivers,

Eli Manning, Dan Fouts, Kirk Cousins, Matt Ryan. That's Mahomes' winning percentage down 10 in the second half is better than the winning percentage of all those quarterbacks. They can't be beaten. Annoying. They're just annoying, Dan. They're so annoying, I found myself thinking in my head yesterday as the Broncos were lining up to kick the game-winning field goal, well, I'm really happy for Sean Payton.

What? That's going somewhere. What? Why? Yeah, not a likable guy, Sean Payton. I, on the way in today, driving in, heard a radio station announcing Denver's found its franchise quarterback, Bo Nix. He's been great. But I'm just like, okay, that caught up to me quickly.

The difference between game one and game 10 for him seems to have been a big difference. Denver is better than all of us thought. And now Jessica's rooting for Denver because Kansas City has gotten to a level of, oh, they shouldn't have won that game. That blocked field goal, that's nonsense at the end of that game. Can you guys play for me the Kevin Harlan sound? Because Kevin Harlan...

had a great call and just the sound. Listen to the sound. Kevin Harlan is speaking for America here with the first guttural sound that is unleashed from somewhere in his nether region.

He laid out for like a full 12 seconds after that and just a loud crowd noise as Mahomes runs all over the field knowing he didn't deserve to win that game. He's so annoying! And reacting as if he just won the Super Bowl. It gets really frustrating when a team that has won as much as they have, have, even though he's not having the best year for himself...

Clearly the best quarterback, maybe arguably ever. And for them to have the luck on top of that, it's just, it gets pretty deflating if you're actively rooting against them. The stat I gave, excuse me, Greg, from, I should give it to Josh DuBow at the Associated Press. It is not my stat. On Mahomes down 10 plus in the second half,

it has a better career winning percentage than quarterbacks that you can argue are Hall of Fame worthy or close to Hall of Fame worthy. Yeah, he was outplayed by Bo Nix. And it's not the first time he's been outplayed by a so-called lesser quarterback. He's having an average season. When you look at the stats under almost any metric here,

he's been routine he's been average this year and what's going to kill me and and i predict it's going to happen he will make the pro bowl purely by habit purely by habit just like a a good left tackle that's going to kill you yeah that will really disappoint me put it out there he does not he does not should not make the pro bowl it's going to kill you put it on go ahead absolutely okay he's going to make the pro bowl and it's going to kill me yeah all right here's the thing i

I did not say, that literally will kill me. I didn't say literally. But it's just weird that you would care that much about it. No. We'll add that context. No, I care. I care. Parenthetically, I didn't mean literally. Right, yeah, exactly. You're just going out there with a very bold topic that Patrick Mahomes is going to be in the Pro Bowl. He will make the Pro Bowl, purely out of habit.

That's what happens. That's the type of opinions you're not hearing anywhere else. Exactly. Thank you. And it will kill you. I don't know what is happening with the following. And I'm not sure we should start with the Chiefs, although I think Jessica is right. They are now officially annoying. It's weird that I still want to talk Bengals Ravens. If that game was that good that I don't want to pretend Saturday and Sunday happened. Mike, I mean, all your MVPs in the league yesterday, farts out. All of them.

Jared Goff, five interceptions, all of them, except for the guy who played on Thursday night, except for Lamar Jackson. All your MVPs, get them out of here. Josh Allen, all of them. They were all sloppy yesterday. I'm going to hemorrhage this NFL season because after every loss, I just like a fiery furnace. Just keep throwing cash at the Rams and Niners and Bengals. I don't care if you keep losing. I'm going to keep trusting you because you're this close.

The good luck that the Chiefs have had this season, and sometimes this is met directly, is only followed by the bad luck the Bengals have seemed to have had this season. And I want to believe in them so bad. And I assume at some point this season, perhaps it's too late, but I assume they're going to ascend to the mean when it comes to some of this stuff. I need you guys' help in a lot of different places. Lucy, how is that apple? Pretty good. Thanks for asking. Is that Honeycrisp? Yeah.

I don't feel, Lucy, you have offered me anything in the way of help in how it is I should start today's show because you have a strong opinion. Mike went the pit game. I'm hungry. I ate an apple. There are four other people here. An apple a day. I know. Thank you, Chris. But you're not answering my question. And I don't also know. Jeremy, I am told, is striking. I don't know. It has.

Do we have video proof of this? Is Jeremy is striking? Is he striking on Lucy's behalf? Because I don't know the nature of Jeremy's strike. I really yelled at him on Friday in front of everybody because...

He was just trying to hide a vulnerability that the entire group would have enjoyed poking fun at, which is... I'm really upset that you decided to do that when I was off. I wish you had seen everything that happened here because he was trying to...

Gosh, this is frustrating. Jeremy was typing and trying to cheat the answer to a question, trying to translate Choque de Gigantes because he'd done a read so poorly and so gringo and so offensive to any Latin heritage that he has that we immediately seized on it, started asking him if he had known what he read, what it meant.

And he just tried to hide it and cheat and talk over me. And then in the middle of it, we started talking about Lucy and young people. And he deflected. And now he's on strike. What does it mean? I'm being told he's going to be on strike shortly. He's getting in position. Okay, so he's late. That's good. He's having a manicure. All right, good, good. He's late arriving to his own strike. All right, I'll check in when I can. Not to inconvenience the young entitled people around here.

It is a holiday. Well, it's not a... It's not a traffic holiday. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Is it a holiday? It is. It's a holiday. It's not a company one. My daughter's off from school and the public commuting situation was a pleasure. I sailed to the studio this morning. Sailed. My car was sailing. I had a big...

thing. Go on. A mast. You'll find it. Talk it out. I was sailing. You didn't have a mast. You don't even know the names of it. I would love it if I could put a mast, a sail mast on my car. I think it would be a funny visual. Sail cars is a funny visual. It is a funny visual. It saves on gas. They have those in Boston. If you wanted to, you could do all of those things. I know. I'm going to. Believe me. You could break the law. The reason I asked if it's a holiday is because I saw

company email the other day for the first time telling me what the holidays were. I was learning for the first time what the holidays were, and this was not one of them. And so I was wondering, are the banks open today? How do you register what is a national holiday? Because I assume national holidays all companies have off, and it seemed to me like most people are working today. School stock market. Yeah.

That's usually a good way to do it. But yes, it is a holiday. But don't think because you're watching us that we don't love the troops. We adore the troops. I love the troops so much that I wanted to be here just so I could say it on this wonderful platform how much I love the troops and I'm thankful because their actions, their bravery, their sacrifice allows me to live this wonderful life.

The Dan Levitard Show with Stu Gatz is sponsored by BetterHelp. From the bottom of my heart, thank all the faithful listeners day in and day out of the Levitard Show. Some of you have stuck around with us for 20 years. Some of you have just gotten here and starting to get into the tent. We appreciate every single one of you listeners because you make this happen every day. Whether it's been 20 years or a few months, thank you. And this month is all about gratitude. And along with the group, I just shouted out there, there's another person we don't get to thank enough. Ourselves.

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You know? It was not fake. It was in no way fake. You can spot a woman faking it. Stugatz. Yes, I can, Jess. Expert. I've been married 40 years. This is the Dan Levitas Show with the Stugatz. Stugatz.

Do you guys see the internet going after Michael Strahan? Because there's a photo of like the Fox crew and they all have their hands on their hearts during the national anthem and he's standing but he just doesn't have his hand on his heart. What algo are you on? I don't think you have to do that. I don't either. I'm with Lucy. Man, X is getting weird, huh? It's been weird. Who would have thought? I didn't see that on Blue Sky. Yeah.

Blue Sky kind of had a moment this weekend, I'm not going to lie. It did. I'm on it. I'm on Blue Sky. I'm more of a Threads guy. I don't understand. I get why people are going to Blue Sky, because they don't want to run into the warm embrace of Mark Zuckerberg, given the trauma, the very recent trauma that everybody's had with X. But it's not like you aren't posting on IG. Just come on. It's already embedded. Get your same follows. I'm over the Threads. Lucy, can you please help me understand where you believe I should be starting the show today? Sure.

because I have so many football stats here. The Vikings, I don't know which game to talk about because the Vikings won a game that hadn't been won in 196 tries by anybody. Not since 2006 as a team had zero touchdowns, three turnovers, and won the football game. But get the Vikings out of here. No one wants to talk about that today, right?

Right. Pats Bears. Does anyone want to talk about Pats Bears? Bears allowing nine sacks a game. Hey, you got to have some offensive linemen or Caleb Williams isn't going to look any good. 2.5 yards per play. I think I might save my Bears takes to later this week when we will do a victory lap because that might be my most correctest take yet.

which is that the Bears finished with one more win than last year. This year was a smashing success. Meanwhile, everyone was like, they're going to make the playoffs. This is the best situation a rookie quarterback's ever been in. They're going to be amazing. I'm like, it's the Bears.

That's the only analysis you need. They have 23 straight drives with no touchdowns. That's 23 straight drives. That's brutal. I mean, they built a team around a rookie quarterback. That Bears team is built around we have value at quarterback. He's got to immediately be good. Let's get him Keenan Allen. Let's get him skill position guys that are going to make it a win now immediately year, and you're going to go 23 drives without touchdowns?

I'm pretty sure Will Levis has had a better month than Caleb Williams has had statistically. And he hasn't played some of it. Well, maybe that's why. Maybe he means metaphorically, too. No, I mean statistically. I'm pretty sure I read among the many stats I read that Will Levis' last four games, most of which he has not played, are better than Caleb Williams' last four games. Early on with his struggles, it was clear.

clear to identify, you know, the offensive line situation isn't great, the coaching situation isn't great, but several weeks have gone by since, and he's not really doing anything with his level of play to mitigate everything that's working against him. Plenty of players have succeeded in the face of

bad coaching. Hell, Aaron Rodgers is the highest rated quarterback of all time. He hasn't exactly had a super dream run, a murderer's row of coaching in his career. You can overcome it. Caleb Williams is doing too much, but also too little. Well, he shouldn't be starting, right? I mean, in retrospect,

The problem is the Bears don't have a quality backup or a veteran backup, so they're sort of stuck letting this guy work out all his kinks. But in today's NFL, those guys have to play because if you actually do succeed and get a good rookie quarterback, you can set your team up to be really aggressive inside a four-year window. So he has to play. Look, other rookie quarterbacks are playing, and...

not exactly regretting the decision to go with their quarterbacks. Jaden Daniels has transformed the Commanders franchise. People are saying that Sean Payton has found his franchise quarterback. So the other quarterbacks are playing us on an issue. I want to get to that Pittsburgh Commanders game because I think a couple of different things. I'm with you now all. I'm sorry I'm late to this party. George Pickens does indeed play weird. I

I love how weird he plays, but he does indeed play weird. He had three plays yesterday where he seemed to be skipping merrily through people and then just attacking people without the football. Getting weirder. We will get to that in a second, but I'm legitimately having trouble with a few of the following things. As Mike Ryan correctly says, hey, Caleb Williams, speed it up. Speed it up. Ten games, speed it up, as I'm watching. I'm watching. This is a game we haven't talked about yet, and it was a good one yesterday.

Kyle Shanahan, who used to be a young person, now looks like he's been ravaged by Key West. Like, ravaged by it. That person is young, and whatever it is, and he's been good in that sport, but whatever that job does to people, and all his 10-point leads that disappear, that dude looks ravaged. He looks like he aged more than Obama has. And I'm watching at the end of that game, and I'm like, holy s***.

The quarterbacks cannot play better than what Purdy and Baker Mayfield are doing at the end of the game, where Baker Mayfield is holding Bosa off for five yards to make plays. Tom Brady called that one of the greatest plays he's ever seen a quarterback make. For a four-yard game.

For a four-yard game because it's just holding Bosa off because it's like holding a live LSU Tiger that was on the field off because you know what that is. Being with a great white shark in the water and you just put your hand on its snout hoping that you can survive it. I would have been less surprised if what he had been holding at arm's length for five full seconds had been a great white shark.

than that he was able to just make Bosa stand there and hold his arm for five yards and that the arm wasn't in Bosa's teeth. I'm still voting for him for MVP. My point is where it comes to quarterback evaluation. Neither Baker Mayfield nor Brock Purdy deserve to lose that game. Purdy made two throws, one to Kittle and one to Parabola to McCaffrey for 30 yards. Just asinine plays to feel like they're saving San Francisco's season.

You guys realize you're being unreasonable with the quarterbacks, right? When you expect Caleb Williams to figure it out in 10 games, like it's not, and he's missing four offensive linemen. Like that's not a sane place to live. Especially when my example is Baker Mayfield, who it took him like maybe 50 games to get to the point of, we still don't kind of trust you.

Baker Mayfield has been just great, beyond great. You could make an argument for him as the MVP right now. But I think the anomaly is the Washington quarterback. The anomaly is not Caleb. He's supposed to struggle. The problem is they're going 23 series in a row without scoring and they're sticking with him. Maybe he needs a break. Maybe two games off would do him well. Why do you refer to him as the Washington quarterback?

I didn't want to say, you know, I don't like their nickname. And I don't want to use their old nickname, and I don't like their new nickname. And he also doesn't like to say Jaden Daniels. Couldn't you have just said Jaden Daniels, though? What difference does it make? You don't know who he is?

Well, maybe think you don't. No, believe me, I'm discombobulated. I'm still trying to wrap my head around you having a pig named Babe Laufenberg. I mean, first of all, that implies that you and your wife have actually considered having a pig. We have. And if you do, you're going to name it Babe Laufenberg. No, we have. That's worth discussing. We have and I have. Okay. I 100% believe you. I don't think that the situation is that bad.

Caleb Williams should be given up on by the fans or the franchise. I think the situation is that, like, I think a lot of people overlooked how bad the O-line situation and the coaching situation was coming into the season. When, I mean, I've been saying since last year, like, I don't know why they stuck with Eber Flus when it seemed after the season ended, they were pretty lukewarm about him. And it would have been probably a good time to bring in a new head coach when you're trading away Justin Fields to...

so you can get Caleb Williams who's supposedly going to change your franchise so like the things those are two like fairly big things that the Bears don't have going for them right now and to be like well it's just the it's just the head coach and the offensive coordinator the offensive line like yeah those are some pretty big things working against a rookie quarterback who hasn't gotten better throughout the season and you can knock him for that but I don't think that you know he's just like a lost cause I think the Bears need to as a organization need to like seriously make some changes

He's not a lost cause, but I do believe that people underestimate the mental ravages of taking someone just out of school who's always been great and telling them, hey, in 10 games, figure out this thing this football city hasn't figured out in 40 years. You're the savior, OK? Going to build it all around you. You're grown up enough to handle this, right? When no one is?

When no one is. And you've got no offensive linemen and you're sacked ten times. And it's two yards per play when we got you Keenan Allen. When we got you speed. We got you this, this. We got you speed. We got you expectations. I put him low on the list on what we're talking about today because he's not going to be one of the winners. Because half the league's not any good.

Half the league. Not any good. Close games galore because everyone's pretty equal. And so, okay, Giants Carolina. It'll be close at the end. But we know we don't have to pay attention to you. We've talked more about the Bears than we should have given what it is that's happened yesterday. Vikings Jags deserve nothing. Titans Chargers are only going to get nationally what they're going to get, which is Harbaugh. Defense. Defense.

That's all the Chargers are getting. But that's pretty good, though. They're a good team. Yes, they are. And Harbaugh, he's in the coach of the year mix right now. Jets Cardinals exists only to make fun of Aaron Rodgers. Ah! Yeah. What was that sound?

Sorry. I still have a lingering cough from last week. And I think Lucy wants to start with college football. I don't think she wants to talk about professional football. Yeah, you asked me this question like 10 minutes ago of where we should start and then completely forgot that I exist. But don't worry about it. But you did finish the apple. But you don't answer it. You didn't give me the chance to answer. Again, I'm asking you. I can't even remember all the options anymore. It's your... She's done with her apple though. You get to choose. You were eating an apple and there were four other people here. There were. There are. One, two, three.

Three, four. That seat, man. Roy, the other day, looked in my face and said he wasn't wearing a costume. And by the way, don't think I haven't noticed that none of you are paying your punishments again. And I'm going to have to go get Sarah Spain again because, again, another season goes by. I haven't lost yet. The listener can't trust us for anything. But in that seat, I looked at Roy and asked him why he didn't and hasn't served any of his punishments. And he said, I'm never here. Looked in my face and said it while sitting there. On Halloween. Wow.

And now you're in that seat telling me I haven't asked you or waited for your answer when I've asked you several times, one of which you were eating an apple. You asked me one time.

Well, okay, twice, because you did ask me while I was eating an apple. I'm asking you again now. It's the third or fourth time I'm asking you. So, one, let's rewind a little bit. You did ask me a second time, and then you gave me 15 different options, and then I've just lost track. Lucy, the option isn't me picking. It's you picking whatever you think we should start the show with. Lucy, what should we start the show with? Here are some things, and then you listed like 10 different games. And now I'm asking you again. You pick one. You don't have to choose from mine. You might have a better one.

Mike chose, miraculously, the Pitt game. Not the Pitt Steelers game, the Pitt Panthers game. Yeah, there's a lot happening in the ACC right now. And if you want tickets to any of those conference games in the ACC, let me tell you, there's one place that you go in the secondary ticket marketplace, and that is the Game Time app.

That is a game time app. I understand, Dan, that you may not have a full grasp of that wide receiver room in Chicago because you keep saying Keenan Allen. There's a rookie wide receiver from Washington. There's an old weapon from Carolina. DJ Moore, yes. Yeah.

dunes a they they got one of them yes but it's not all on keenan allen thankfully for uh for caleb williams and thankfully it's not all on you to find a better ticket out there in the ticket marketplace because game time now has game time picks a wonderful new feature that filters out the fluff and gives you the best seats at the best prices you get all in pricing with just the touch of a little tab at the top you get no surprises in at the checkout

place and then you also get panoramic seat views and stellar ticket coverage game time app i'm so thankful you're in my life hey new customers out there use a promo code d-a-n to redeem 20 off your first purchase on that majestic game time app download game time today chris cody what time is it game time i used it yesterday went to the iowa virginia tech game in charlotte great game go hawks the women are back

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Don Levitard. Baker Mayfield tearing up Tampa Bay, 38 for 45. Stugatz. Shred them! This is the Don Levitard Show with the Stugatz. ♪♪

Put it on the poll, Juju, at Labotard Show. Does Kyle Shanahan look like he's been ravaged by Key West? Yes or no? He does. He's just grown his beard out now. But it's got a lot of gray. It's got a lot of stress in it. He looked like really handsome when he decided to go with the mustache over the offseason, like a sophisticated man that came from money.

We can agree, right, no matter what these people are paid, that these are stressful jobs, right? That Mike McCarthy doesn't feel very good today, no matter how much he's making. That Kyle Shanahan has done an awful lot of winning, but we associate him with, you know, blown leads. And even though he's done it with people like Brock Purdy and Jimmy Garoppolo, he does all of this winning. And for some reason, people have now tired of him.

In much the same way that Jessica is tired of the Kansas City Chiefs. I'm still not clear on what Lucy said the storyline of the weekend was. She's still thinking. I have a choice, but I don't want to say it because I think people are going to get their feelings hurt.

Oh, you want to talk about University of Miami football? Kind of a little bit. Okay. No, I'm happy to. I want to also talk about Inter-Miami. I don't know which was the more... I thought it was her choice. Yeah, I didn't choose Inter-Miami. Women don't have choices in Florida. Not anymore. Touche. Touche. Why did you just pull out a sword and touche? Jeremy, touche.

Because, you know, she made a political comment that I happen to agree with. I gave her a touche. She also made a comment comment and you're like, I don't want to talk about Miami. I want to talk about inner Miami. No, I was just, I was, no, I was coming from an honest place. I was putting both of them next to each other and saying a brutal weekend for Miami sports with stakes on it. I'm,

At the hands of Atlanta. Didn't all the Florida teams lose? Isn't all Florida football 0-10 this weekend? 0-11 across Florida. I can't believe Florida State didn't pull it out. Just can't believe it. That was the most surprising one. 52-3 against Notre Dame. Good showing by them.

It made me sad. It made me feel bad. Todd Blackledge at the end of the game sort of like scolded Notre Dame for continuing to drive the ball and like throw the ball in the fourth quarter and then score. And I don't think Todd Blackledge realized that Notre Dame had all of their backups in their backup quarterback walk on wide receivers and Florida State still could not stop them.

The history of the sport has not seen a drop this precipitous in what it is that's happened to FSU. We have not seen it. They went back to 1960 to give a percentage drop from 13-1 to 1-9 from one season to the next. It doesn't have much precedent in the history of college football. This Miami topic rocks. Keep going.

I will get to Lucy's Miami topic in a second, but Tony has phoned in now. Why did you ask me to choose and then ignore it? And then you get mad at me. This is ridiculous. You need 60% in the state, I guess. Tony. No matter if most people want something. Tony is in Coconut Grove.

and he has his top five football things. I imagine he has more than five. Oh, that is still there. That is still there. Still here. I can't believe that that's still in Coconut Grove. How long has that been there? Dan, when was the last time that you were at Barracuda's? Question. I'm going to say 11 years ago. Hey!

Okay, so 11 years ago, you were here in college, no? Early 90s? Well, that's many years ago, but you said last time. Yes, 30 years ago, I was there much too much.

So add another 30 years to that. This has always been here. This is an establishment here in Coconut Grove. This is actually the first time that we've done something at Tony's Top 5 here in Coconut Grove, my home away from home. I had a guy walk by me just before we got on air and said, Dan LeBittard, I love that guy. I said, all right, we're going live. There's another guy over here doing a dissertation but just cracked open a middle of the light. I mean, that's the Grove for you. Like anything can happen in the Grove.

They have a Veterans Day parade, by the way. Today is a holiday, by the way. They have a Veterans parade here at Coconut Grove starting in a couple minutes. But yes, I do have more than just five, Dan, to answer your question. Kuda's opened in 95, according to their Instagram. Okay, so just after College Time. Nah, it's always been here. When I was there. So, Tony, you've got your top five, and you've got a couple of extra as well. Let's get started. Where do you want to get started?

Let's get to the OLI. I heard a lot of different starts to the show. People wanted to start here. People want to start there. I'm going to start right here. Eagles back.

It's a question. With the eyeball emoji. I feel like yesterday was about Dallas losing, not Philadelphia winning. I feel like that was... Sure. When we're talking to Jerry Jones about poorly building your stadium because the sunlight is affecting C.D. Lamb's ability to see the ball. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Sorry. Please do not spoil the list. Okay, my bad. I'm sorry. I was listening very intently.

Because last week we talked about, Tony, why don't you listen to the show on Days You're Not In so you can take stuff out of your top five when things get said on the show. And I was waiting and hoping that things didn't get mentioned during the start of the show that I could bring up now during the show. So something that was brought up, but obviously everybody's talking about it because it's probably the hottest thing in the Mile High City. Bo Nix showing us something right now, Dan. Oh, my God. So we're here. Ten games in. Bo Nix is everything Caleb Williams isn't.

I mean, you said it, not me. Did you see the pass on, I think it was a third and eight? He kind of like got out of the pocket and threw an absolute laser to Cortland Sutton to get them in position to kick that game-winning field goal. I mean, the kid's got something.

Who are you looking at? Last OLI. Here it is. Why are you looking around? Keep your eye on the prize. Keep your eye on the prize. No, just people giving us fist bumps because they see kind of what we're doing here and they love it. People getting fired up with the group early. Use the camera, though. Use the camera. Not everyone around you. The camera's right in front of you. No, I know that guy. Yeah, there he is. Wow, what a crowd. All right.

It's early, Greg. Tony is surrounded by all of the people who are getting hyped for tonight's Dolphins game, expecting the Dolphins to rescue their season against the Rams. He's surrounded by all the energy and power of South Florida loving the Dolphins. OLI, keep going, Tony. Last one.

It was a bad moment. It was almost calabasa, calabasa for Sam Darnold. Almost. If they wouldn't have pulled out that game, Dan, it would have been calabasa, calabasa. Really? And I hate to say that, but it's the truth. Yeah. So many. How many interceptions has he thrown inside the 25-yard line this season? Is it seven, eight? A million. It's a lot. A million. Okay. I think it's less than a million. It might be less than six or seven, but it's a lot.

Ask Kevin O'Connell. He'll let him tell you a million because it feels like it. All right, we'll start off with our number five here, the good stuff. Jared Goff has now thrown his seventh career game with at least four interceptions. His record in those games, Dan, 6-0. No way. That can't be right. That's according on Twitter to Mr. Siv. That's according to Mr. Siv on Twitter. But...

Dan, I'm just telling you, golf tosses five interceptions. Are you sure he's not making that up? Is he making it up? I think he's making that up. Dan, you know how it is. I don't think you verified that stat. That stat can't be right. Dan, if there's any stat on Twitter, you know it's correct. That's just a fact. There's just no way that's right. There's nothing I can do about that. It can't be right. All right, so the Lions end up clawing back and winning that game. Dan, do you know what the Lions are right now? Hey!

The best team in the NFL? That can't be true. There's no way that he's thrown four interceptions that many times. Not that he's 6-0. You guys look it up. There's no way that he's done it six times. I believe he has. You think he's thrown four interceptions in a game six times? I believe Jared Goff probably has six four-interception games. I do not believe that he's 6-0 in those games.

I will not believe that. According to Mr. Siv. There's just no way that's real. I didn't say it. Mr. Siv did. Get Siv on the phone. Also not real. Jessica said to me just a second ago, we're just on number five? Number four. Yeah. Number four. We've built the most intricate cathedrals of football in the 21st century, yet at Jerry World, the sun is still making a difference during scoring plays, Dan. The sun. Got into CeeDee Lamb's eyes as he ran by.

He did. The ball went right by him. He put his hands up. I know. He's only thrown four interceptions in a game twice. Ha!

And he lost. Mr. Siv, that's not my fault. That's Mr. Siv. Tony, you got to do better than that. Come on, Tony. Number three. Mr. Siv, Dan. Who is Mr. Siv? Number three. I take back calling that a good stat. He's the guy that put up the stat on Twitter. Tony, you got to verify. You got to verify who the people are taken from someone who's been butt cracked. You got to verify it. Vet it. Yeah. Yeah, but it's better when you don't. That's true. Number three.

And I was worried that this was going to come up during the Caleb Williams conversation, and I was hoping that it didn't, and I'm glad it didn't. So number three is, Caleb Williams at the beginning of the season texted rookie punter Torrey Taylor that you're not going to be punting much here. They punted eight times yesterday and 45 times for the season. Yeah, they're not good. Not good at offense. I feel for that kid. Number two, we're about to find out if the Steelers are the best team in football or the third best team in the division. Hey!

Tough division, Dan. Bengals could beat them twice in the next couple of games. And then what? And then what do we do? Jessica made a face at you. Jessica's not having you not believing in her two lost Steelers. She always makes a face at me. Jessica thinks... I mean, no. I like them. Put it on the poll. The beginning of it was, we're about to find out if they're the best team in football. Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Who's the best team? The 8-2 Steelers or the 4-6 Bengals? Who's better?

Hot. They were hot, though. Offense is getting rolling. Number one, Dan, and this is one that I'm very happy to announce. The classic. Fire your coach. Start scraps on offense because everybody is hurt. But have a fiery assistant coach take over with a great nickname. Win for the Saints. Coach Riz. That was electric yesterday, you got to admit, right? They had Marquez Valdez-Scantling catching touchdown. Derek Carr. I mean, who was on that team? All of a sudden, you look at Coach Riz on the sidelines, and he's like...

Well, that's how he was in the morning, too. Thank you, Tony. You left out the Coach Riz statistic that everyone was talking about yesterday. He went into the press conference afterward and explained that his Sunday started with him just clogging a toilet. He's 6-0 whenever he clogs a toilet before a game.

That's right. Can you get me a snapper sandwich, Tony? According to Mr. Sip, Dan, thank you. I don't think it's open yet. Who would think of a snapper sandwich? You'll ever have. It's not open yet, but they're inside, and I'm actually going to knock on the door, maybe get a couple of middle lights to go, bring a snapper sandwich. Dan, you want anything? Fish dip? You're a fish dip kind of guy, right, Dan? Oh, fish dip, yes. I don't think they're going to open anytime soon. You're a fish dip guy. I know, Dan. I love fish dip. Thank you, Tony. Appreciate your tough time. For me, they're going to open. No worries.

By the way, while we're on the topic, Kudas, they know how to be spooky. Very spooky around Halloween season. They had some nice inflatable spiders in their trees around the picnic tables. Very spooky establishment. I'm a big fan. Great place to take a dog.

How do you guys feel about Darren Rizzi saying his Sunday began with clogging a toilet? Love it. I love the honesty. He grew up in a dolphin's camp, so he knows how to take a crap. You love it. Let's play the sound of Coach Rizzi making everyone emotional because who doesn't understand the humanizing connection points involved with clogging a toilet?

This is how my day started. I get down here to the stadium, I get down here to Superdome, I go in the head coach's locker room, which I've never used before. So here I am early in the morning, I go to the bathroom, and this is how my day started. I clogged the toilet.

And I'm like, this is going to be a crappy day, pun intended. And so, listen, I'm like, okay, this is not really a great start to the day. Here we go. And so, yeah, I'm not really feeling like a head coach of an NFL team right now. So I'm like, really? This is really how we're going to start my day? If your coach doesn't sound like that, he's not coaching right. That's what a coach should sound like right there. Yes, I agree. The scratchy voice, perfect.

Perfect. And the special teams coach, you put a mic in front of a special teams coach, you're going to get gold because they're not used to anybody talking to them. He's the interim head coach. Well, whatever. He's 1-0, 1-1, whatever he is. It's 500. Throwing his hat in the ring.

You really don't have anything on this, huh? Like, you just petered out and you just... You started the show by saying you could go for four straight hours. I could, but like... Yeah, let me... Here's what... You just... You petered out in time. You're staring at us. You got nothing. You're just...

Okay, the subject is a coach taking a crap and sticking up the toilet. What am I supposed to have on that? We've all done it. You did all that you could with that story. Thank you. I appreciate your contribution. You did. I've done it a lot. Nobody ever interviews me about it. What am I supposed to say, Rizzy? I mean, good for him. I give him credit for honesty. I think a lot of, you know, Mike Tomlin probably stuck up the toilet before he played Sunday. He didn't admit it.

You know, he would never admit that. There has to be another head coach in the league that did that on Sunday and isn't talking about it. Thank you. Dan Campbell, Lucy can attest. That coffee diet, it's not pleasant. I do not believe that there is another coach in the NFL that clogged the toilet in the morning and is covering it up. Have you looked at Andy Reid lately?

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