Ronny Chieng on Trump's Dubious Attempt to Blame Political Violence on Democrats' Rhetoric | Luis Elizondo
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Welcome to the Emmy Award winning Daily Show. I'm Emmy Award winner Ronny Chieng. Please address me as such. We've got so much to talk about tonight. Donald Trump had a very busy weekend. Republicans want you to tone your rhetoric down, you bastards. And RFK Jr. is still doing RFK Jr. things. So let's get into today's headlines. Ever since Joe Biden dropped out for being old as shit, lots of people have been saying, what about Donald Trump? He's also an old man.

But listen, Trump has energy, okay? Look how much he got done this weekend. He held a rally, he started a crypto company you definitely should put all your money into, and he got in nine holes of golf. Well, five holes. That was a bit of an interruption. Tonight, the chilling new details of the apparent second assassination attempt on Donald Trump. Yo, again? Yes!

Hey, will you people stop trying to assassinate Donald Trump? Not only is it morally wrong, but you're also just giving him more things to brag about. They only tried to kill Abraham Lincoln once. That makes me twice as great as him.

But yes, this weekend, a crazy person tried to hunt Donald Trump in his natural habitat, his golf course. Investigators say a Secret Service agent monitoring the woods ahead of Mr. Trump as he played golf on Sunday saw a rifle barrel through the tree line and opened fire. The subject, who did not have line of sight to the former president, fled the scene. He did not fire or get off any shots.

at our agent. Cell phone records show he had been in place at the edge of the golf course for nearly 12 hours. This guy managed to walk into Trump's golf course and stay there undetected for 12 hours. Okay, and I don't know if you've thought about this, Trump, but maybe you should consider building, you know, like a wall. Like, I don't know if you're like a wall guy. Just think about it. But, by the way...

Have you noticed that the news reports are all like a harrowing, near tragedy, sending chills through a nation? And meanwhile, everyone you actually know is like, oh, yeah, yeah, I saw that. Yeah. I mean, we have to act like it's a big deal, but it doesn't really have the same impact of the first one. You know, it's kind of like Black Panther 2. You're like...

Yeah, I guess I'll see it. I mean, how is that going to work? Now, the Secret Service is getting a lot of heat for letting that guy get this far. But don't worry, they're taking action. As part of that increased focus on security, the Palm Beach County Sheriff now says that Mar-a-Lago behind me has the highest security level possible, equivalent to when Donald Trump was president.

That's right, the highest security level possible. It goes security, maximum security, and then home alone level. I'm talking paint cans on the stairs, scary movies playing really loud, a cardboard cutout of Trump in the windows moving back and forth. And if things get really bad, Trump's scary old friend will show up and protect him. Now, the motive of the assassin remains unclear, so we'll have to look at who might have a reason to be angry at Donald Trump.

On Sunday, three hours before the attempt on his life, Trump blared, I hate Taylor Swift on Truth Social, reacting to her bombshell endorsement of Kamala Harris. Oh, Donald tweeting, I hate Taylor Swift. That's dangerous. I mean, I would rather buy one of those Hezbollah pages than tweet, I hate Taylor Swift. I think Trump needs to stick to racism. It's less divisive.

The assassin this weekend was probably not a Swifty, okay? He doesn't fit the MO. Swifties are non-violent. They prefer to cyber bully you until you kill yourself.

So why did this guy come for Trump? I mean, according to J.D. Vance, Trump's VP and the worst thing to happen to cat ladies since feline AIDS, Democrats made him do it. The left needs to tone down the rhetoric and needs to cut this crap out. We cannot tell the American people that one candidate is a fascist and if he's elected, it is going to be the end of American democracy. Yeah, liberals.

Stop accurately describing Trump, okay? You're putting him in danger when you repeat the things he says verbatim. But J.D. Vance has a point. The left needs to stop calling its political opponents fascists, okay? You don't see Donald Trump doing that all the time. She's a Marxist.

She's a fascist. She's a Marxist, communist, fascist, socialist. We have a fascist person running. There's a radical left, Marxist, communist, fascist. She's a Marxist, communist, fascist person. That last one, it felt like he ran out of words. The end it is. She's a Marxist, communist, fascist, dermatologist.

I mean, Trump has called Kamala "fascist" so much, I'm not sure he knows her name. It's like when you say to a coworker, "Oh, hey, uh, hey, uh, yeah, good to see you, my fascist buddy."

Don't forget the rules of slurs either, okay? You can use the word if you are one. That's why I can call someone else Ronnie, but you can't call me Ronnie, okay? That's our word. But look, whether or not you think the rhetoric should be toned down, it's just not something that Trump and Vance actually believe in. I mean, for the past week, the city of Springfield has been overrun with bomb threats after Trump and Vance claimed that Haitian immigrants are eating everyone's cats and dogs, which there is no evidence of. I mean, people love posting photos of their food, okay? So we would have seen it by now.

But when Trump was asked about those bomb threats, he didn't seem too concerned. - Did you denounce the bomb threats in Springfield, Ohio? - I don't know what happened with the bomb threats. I know that it's been taken over by illegal migrants.

Yeah, the guy who wants everyone to believe he's super concerned about political violence can't even bring himself to say he's against bomb threats. I mean, what more information are you waiting for? It's a bomb threat. You need to know who the bomb was gonna vote for? I mean, I can't believe this guy is saying there are very fine bomb threats on both sides. You know, this isn't a trick question. This is a layup for politicians. It's like, do you support the troops or do you like Taylor Swift? Just say yes. It's a layup.

So will any of the heated rhetoric in this country change? Probably not. But there was at least one moment over the weekend that offered a glimmer of hope. President Biden tonight spoke on the phone with Trump. The White House describes the conversation as cordial, with Biden sharing his relief that the former president is safe, and then Trump thanking Biden for the call. Oh, yeah, Joe Biden. I forgot about that guy. That's right, he's the president.

It's so nice when two 80-year-old men can speak to each other on the last piece of technology they can truly understand. And I know what you're thinking. It would be great if we knew exactly what they talked about on that call. Well, luckily, we at The Daily Show got our hands on the very real audio recorded. Hello? Hey, Donnie. It's me, President Joe, uh... Biden? That's it. Biden. My name's Joe Brandon. I just want to say I'm glad you're safe.

Directing Secretary Service makes your Miralago completely secure. Thank you, Joe. And let me just say, please come back. Please, Joe. This race is no fun without you. Everyone is shooting at me. This black lady keeps laughing at me in the debates. I need you back, Joe. We had good times together, didn't we? Of course we did, Donnie. Run, get your last thing in my life, Purpose.

Nowadays, no one even pays attention to me. Just yesterday, I fell down a flight of stairs. Jill just walked over me. Then tell everyone you're back in the race. You can call me a threat to democracy. I'll call you a demented head of an international crime family. It'll be like old times. Don't you think I want to? They won't let me. Nancy Pelosi is outside my door right now with a baseball bat.

Sorry, Donnie. I gotta go. I gotta go, too. J.D. Vance just called women walking embryo bags, so I gotta deal with that. Goodbye, Joe. Wait, Donnie.

You have to, son of a bitch. You've made me the happiest man alive.

I'm so happy for them. When we come back, we'll talk about the latest RFK scandal involving the course of an animal. So don't go away.

It's time for a brand new season of Survivor. And you know what that means. It means it's also a brand new season of the only official Survivor podcast on fire. Here's our goal with this podcast. We bring you inside the how and the why of what we do on the show. And we do it from three different points of view. You have the producer in me. You have the fan in Jay, who also happens to be our executive producer in this podcast. And you have the producer in me.

And then we bring you the insight from a former player, and this season it is Survivor 46 runner-up, Charlie Davis. Welcome to the team, Charlie. Well, Jeff, I know firsthand that playing from the couch and playing on the island, completely different. So I hope you tune in. Every single week, we're going to dissect the strategy, the misfires and mistakes that change the game. If you want more Survivor than just 90 minutes, this is where you get it. On Fire, the only official Survivor podcast.

Listen to On Fire, the official Survivor podcast, wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to The Daily Show. The 2024 race has been going on for about 60 years now. And for me, the worst part was having to hear about RFK Jr. and all the weird things he does with animals.

I mean, we had to learn how he grills goat skeletons and how he picks up dead bears and dumps it in Central Park and how his head is a cemetery for brain-eating worms. But last month, he dropped out of the race. And thank Buddha, because now I don't have to listen to any more of his weird animal shit. Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is now under federal investigation for allegedly decapitating a dead whale and taking the head home.

What is going on with this dude? Is there any animal on earth he won't mutilate? I mean, keep that creep the hell away from Mudeng. Now he's under federal investigation for whale beheading and I have so many questions. I mean, for instance, how do you know where the head starts? I mean, where does the tie go? Does it go like up here or is it like down after the fins? I mean, the whole animal is a head.

And also, I didn't even know the government had an agency for whale crimes. They must have been so happy to get this case. I mean, I bet that morning they were like, guys, guys, I think we're going to have to shut down. There's just not enough whale crimes to justify our budget. So you're all fired in three, two, whoa, wait, hang on, the phone is ringing. Yes, yes, yes, we can be right there. Yes, okay, we might have to rearrange our schedule, but just wait for us.

And by the way, if you're wondering how he brought the whale head home, well, it's as gross as you think. The longtime conservationist allegedly sawed the head off a dead whale back in 1994 after it washed up on a Massachusetts beach. Kennedy reportedly cut off the whale's head and then bungee corded it to the roof of the family minivan before driving it across state lines to bring it back to his New York home so he could study the skull.

RFK's daughter, Kik Kennedy, originally shared the fishy anecdote more than a decade ago. She said every time they accelerated, quote, whale juice poured into the windows. How can you be in the same family as Ted Kennedy and still have the worst driving story in the family? RFK Jr. keeps saying that vaccines caused his health problems, but, uh, hey, maybe you think it's from inhaling car exhaust and Shamu Jism for eight hours?

My big question is, what the hell did RFK do with the whale's head? I mean... Aye, he sold the great head to me. Wait, wait, who said that? Who said that? Did I? A hardy whaler who scours the wine-dark seas for its blubbery beasts.

Okay, wait, hold on. Are you some sort of old-timey fisherman? Sure. Don't you see the beard in the pipe? The seas were angry that some were more than the seas. Okay, okay, okay, I got it. I don't need a whole sea shanty, okay? Are you saying that you buy whale heads from RFK Jr.? Why would you do that? Well, if you know of a better way to get whale juice, I'm all ears. Uh,

You two-legged landlubber. Okay, can you just tell me, what do you even do with a whale's head? What don't I do with them? Their oil fuses the gas lamps from Nantucket. Their bones make fine corsets for the lasses of New Bedford. And the blowholes are nature's fleshlight. Okay, wow, that's...

That is gross. Oh, someone likes to kink shame, don't they, huh? Get with the times, man. It's 1824. The point is, I need more whale heads. So, spread the word across the seven seas. A gold doubloon to any greenhorn who brings me the skull of the Leviathan. Okay, I don't think doubloons are legal tender anymore. Okay, fine. Crypto, then. Either way.

It'll buy you many a blowhole for the lonely nights at sea. Listen, old-timey sailor, decapitating whales is wrong. It doesn't have to be a whale. Any creature of the sea will earn you me treasure. The tentacles of an octopus, the jaws of a great white, the head of the orphan clownfish they call Nemo, and an extra doubloon to any man who brings me the giant squid of the deep so I can make her my bride. Get what?

What? Did you just say you're going to marry a squid? What did I say about king shaming, man? Why are you king shaming? Okay, look, look. You sound like you really know RFK Jr. really, really well, okay? So are you going to be voting for him? No. I collect the severed heads of whales. I'm not a lunatic. Old-timey sailor, everybody. When we come back, Luis Elizondo will be joining me on the show, so don't go away.

It's time for a brand new season of Survivor. And you know what that means. It means it's also a brand new season of the only official Survivor podcast on fire. Here's our goal with this podcast. We bring you inside the how and the why of what we do on the show. And we do it from three different points of view. You have the producer in me. You have the fan in Jay, who also happens to be our executive producer of this podcast. And you have the producer in me.

And then we bring you the insight from a former player, and this season it is Survivor 46 runner-up Charlie Davis. Welcome to the team, Charlie. Well, Jeff, I know firsthand that playing from the couch and playing on the island, completely different. So I hope you tune in every single week. We're going to dissect the strategy, the misfires and mistakes that change the game. If you want more Survivor than just 90 minutes, this is where you get it. On Fire, the only official Survivor podcast.

Listen to On Fire, the official survivor podcast, wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is the former head of the secretive Pentagon unit that studied UFOs. He's written the best-selling book, Imminent, inside the Pentagon's hunt for UFOs. Please welcome Luis Elizondo. Thank you.

Okay, so, you know, thanks for coming on the show, Luis. Thank you for having me. My honor and privilege. Yeah, it's really nice to take a break talking about divisive American politics to talk about what is going on. It's aliens? Well, first of all, we don't call them aliens anymore. That's kind of a politically incorrect term. Oh, they're woke. The aliens are woke. We now call them in the Pentagon NHI, non-human intelligence. Okay, maybe we should probably...

give people your bona fides a bit. You ran in intelligence and counterintelligence. Right. Yeah, so after college, I spent some time, went into the United States Army, spent some time in military intelligence, and then from there, I was recruited into some special activity programs where I became a special agent in counterintelligence, investigating terrorism and espionage,

And in 2009, early 2009, I was brought in to run counterintelligence for that program, what is now known as AATIP, the Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program. And later on, I wound up being one of its senior members. Right. So you are a military man, a veteran. You are intelligence officer, counterintelligence officer, a grown adult.

By your own words, you're also a fat-based person. You've said that in interviews. But I'm also proof that you don't have to be intelligent to be an intelligence. Well, no, I wouldn't go that far. Let me just put that out there. Okay, well, let me put this out there. What the...

is going on with these aliens. There's aliens? So what is alien? What is going on? There's aliens? What is this? So the U.S. government for many decades has been investing a lot of taxpayer money looking into this topic here. And it turns out that there are absolutely technologies that are coming into our controlled U.S. airspace over our sensitive military installations, may have the ability to interfere with our nuclear equities.

And, yeah, it's real. Not only are pilots picking it up and reporting it, also we've got on electro-optical data like gun camera footage, FLIR footage, and also radar data. And it's not just here. It looks like it's pretty pervasive all over the world now. So what? There's aliens. There's f***ing aliens. There are f***ing aliens on Earth right now, and they're doing shit. What are they doing? How you put those two words together, I'm not sure they're necessarily... I'm not sure they're necessarily... Yo, there are f***ing aliens.

aliens come. Okay, so what are they doing? What are they doing here? What are they doing? So, it appears that they're very interested in our technology. We don't know yet. I want to be very clear here. But why? They came here. They don't want to look at my iPhone 16. No, but they... They got shit that flew across the stars. They don't care about... They are very interested in our military equities and capabilities and also our nuclear technology.

And I think what's for me, what was most compelling is that in some cases you had literally, literally near misses of U.S. combat aircraft coming within 15 feet of these objects, in some cases literally splitting a combat formation right down the middle. These are things that can do things that none of our vehicles can replicate. Their performance capabilities are far beyond anything that we have. And quite frankly, there's not a whole lot we can do about it right now.

So beyond a shadow of a doubt, you've seen the evidence there are aliens. Oh, the government's already come out. Look, you have a former director of national intelligence, a former director of CIA, a former president of the United States all coming out and saying officially, yeah, there's something to this. I mean, these things look like they're definitely interested in our stuff. And furthermore...

When the government first came out with their new UFO program called Arrow, their first report said, yeah, there's 143 of these incidents, but we expect these numbers to go down as we figure them out. The next report that came out, there was over 300. The next report, there's now over 800. So the number's increasing, not decreasing. Okay, so why is this getting buried in the cycle or something? Because Donald Trump says, I hate Taylor Swift, so we just never see this stuff. We're in presidents. The government has said these things are around. So, yeah.

Yeah, therein lies the problem. It's a bureaucracy. Look, the men and women, fine men and women of the Pentagon and the U.S. government do incredible work. And most of the time, we are a lot better off as a society because of their professionalism. Unfortunately, in this particular case, the bureaucracy was a problem. We continued to try to get alarm bells up to the Secretary of Defense over and over again, but there was this layer of these proverbial Praetorian guards that didn't want to tell the Secretary of Defense

that we were spending taxpayer money looking into these things and oh by the way turns out they're real okay are you with all due respect is there any chance that you are accidentally describing the synopsis to Independence Day

Because that's the movie. That was in the movie. They couldn't get to the dude because they wouldn't listen. So you're telling me aliens are going to take over because of U.S. government bureaucracy? Well, I certainly hope that's not the case. I think, you know, when we look at this issue here, this has been going on for decades. This has been going on since the late 1940s. Now, when I say that, people go, wait a minute. You're talking about Roswell? Was Roswell real? Was Roswell real? It was. Absolutely. Okay, so what was at Roswell?

There was a crash. It was a vehicle that had broken into two pieces, and it was recovered by the United States government, taken to a secure military installation, and then from there it went out to certain locations,

What is in that book I'm allowed to talk about? That went through the Pentagon review process, so I am legally able to talk about it. There are things that I'm still not yet allowed to talk about. What are those things? Tell us those things. That sounds like... Well, let's see here. I do not look good in an orange jumpsuit, so I got to be very careful. Are you going to look good in whatever jumpsuit the aliens put on you? We better be...

This is the, it sounds like we're battling aliens and bureaucracy here. Can we, I don't know if we can fight a two front war on this. Can we choose a side to fight here? I think I'd prefer to fight aliens if I had to choose between bureaucracy and aliens.

To be honest. But OK, so in the book, you say that. And by the way, I mean, I read the book and it's it's a very it's a page turner. It's very well written. It's easy to follow it like in it. You say like the best case scenario right now is that aliens are national security threat.

Issue. Issue. To determine if something is a threat, it's really a very simple calculus. It's capabilities versus intent. Now, we've seen some of the capabilities. We still have no idea the intent. So therefore, we don't know if it's a threat. But let me give you a very quick analogy here.

You probably live in a great, lovely area, just like your audience here. Do you lock your door at night? I live in New York City, so no, not really. Do you lock your front door? There's aliens here right now in New York City, as you can see. Yeah, I do lock my front door. And most people do. And let's say you lock your windows and you turn on your alarm. Let's say one Sunday morning you come downstairs to have a hot cup of coffee or tea,

And despite your doors being locked in your window and your alarm on, there's now size 12 muddy boot prints in your living room floor, in your carpet that weren't there the night before. Now, no one's been hurt. Nothing's out of place. But despite you doing all this other stuff and locking doors and making sure the alarm's on, there are now footprints in your living room carpet that weren't there the night before. My question to you is, is that a threat? And so my response is from a national security perspective, I was wearing my national security hat. It

It could be if it wanted to be, so we probably should figure out how it's getting into the house. We should probably move at that point. We should probably get out of that apartment. There's boot prints. There's people walking around. So these things are, we're encountering them over controlled U.S. airspace, like I said, over sensitive military installations. And so from a national security perspective, we've got to figure out what these things are.

No shit, no shit. We got to figure out what's going on. You see, you're saying you're being very professional and being very technical and being very calm as an intelligence officer. And then you're saying there's aliens here that we don't know what they want.

Okay, what should people take away from this? There's aliens and what, fire? When you see a shoot on site, what should you do? No, no, don't do that. I would recommend not doing that. I think what people need to know right now, the U.S. government is taking this topic very seriously. There's several pieces of legislation that are going through Congress right now. There are members in both the House and the Senate that have been briefed by whistleblowers on this topic, people who have been part of certain efforts, UAP efforts in the past,

Your shit's not getting mixed up with the Border Act, right? Because when you say aliens, I don't think they really know which ones you're talking about. Right, well, these, I mean, yeah, you have illegal aliens and then you've got... Illegal aliens, yeah. You've got some other... Yeah, right. I don't know how you got...

So there's acts coming out. There's legislation. What legislating against intergalactic aliens? Well, I think the idea is to open the door for whistleblowers to come out and be able to have a protected conversation with Congress so Congress can then have a conversation with the American people. I think that's really what this is about. And certainly I think there are certain people in Congress. By the way, for the first time, this is a bipartisan issue. You've got both liberals and conservatives on the Hill, can you believe it, of all things,

UAP, right? No, see, that's the most far-fetched thing you've said all day. I know, right. That is not. Who would have thought? Oh,

I'll believe aliens, but there's no way these guys are working together. They are. I swear to God. I can't say who they are, but their names have already been, I think, in the press quite a bit. But on both sides, they are taking this topic very seriously. A lot of these folks have military backgrounds. Why don't they just let it out? Just let the news out. Just tell people. Just show them the freaking...

Show them the photo of the alien selfie with the president and then let's get it out there and let's handle it. We've spent many decades backing ourselves into a corner on this conversation. And the government has said publicly what its position is. Now it's in a situation where it's having to unwind that conversation and say, look, folks, we haven't always been completely forthcoming and truthful with you. And that's a hard conversation to have. What are you talking about? There's aliens. Have the conversation. There's aliens. There's aliens.

- There's aliens. All right, well, can we stop them? - Well, I don't know. I mean, that's not a question for me. That's a question for our leaders. - It's kind of a question for you. I think you're the only one who can, because it sounds like your attitude also seems to be like, yeah, they're here, I've seen them. They have capabilities beyond our understanding.

And nothing much we can do about it. So, you know, keep watching Paramount+. And I don't know what we're supposed to do about this now. I think, look, I personally think Americans can handle the truth about this topic. I think it is, I mean, we can joke a lot about it, but the reality is that these things, whatever they are, wherever they're from. They're f***ing aliens. This is real. These are real? All right. Yeah, it's real. Whatever it is. Okay.

Okay, well, is there a chance that if the government tells people aliens are real and shows them, we'll unite together in a global effort to defeat them? Well, you know, there was a famous speech by Reagan back in the 80s where he said... By Bill Pullman in Independence Day. And him. Yeah, that's right. Where they said that if the truth of this came out, it would probably unite the world. Yo, we need it now. Let's go, aliens. Aliens, let's go now.

This is the time. The reality is... This is the time. We got a lot of shit going down now. Aliens. Aliens. Now I'm down for aliens now. Okay. Look, uniting Congress is already a big enough challenge. Let's get these folks on the same sheet of music. Let's get the briefings they need and then let them have a conversation with their constituents. You're talking about paperwork. I'm talking about aliens. Aliens.

The government survives off of paperwork. It is a bureaucracy, unfortunately. So we have to look. There's a there's a I've always said there's a there's a right way to do things. And you can do also it right now. But they're not necessarily the same thing. Doing things right and right now may not be.

you know, the same thing. - What do you mean? There's aliens and you want to go through bureaucracy and try to unite Congress before you can fight the aliens? No, fight the aliens! Get the aliens out. - I think there's opportunity here. In the last seven years, I think we've come further on this conversation than we have the last 70.

There are elements now in the government that want this conversation to occur. They want the American people to know, look, this is the worst kept secret at this point, probably in the U.S. government. I mean, it's pathetic. The fact that so many people now in our militaries, our intelligence communities, have even in some cases come up close and personal with these things. Wait, what? Yeah. Okay, this is crazy. Anyway, imminent is...

Imminent is available now. I wish we could. We could talk for hours about this thing. Luis Elizondo, everybody. We're going to take a quick break, and we'll be right back after this. So when you get it, we'll be right back. Thank you.

It's time for a brand new season of Survivor. And you know what that means. It means it's also a brand new season of the only official Survivor podcast on fire. Here's our goal with this podcast. We bring you inside the how and the why of what we do on the show. And we do it from three different points of view. You have the producer in me. You have the fan in Jay, who also happens to be our executive producer of this podcast. And you have the producer in me.

And then we bring you the insight from a former player, and this season it is Survivor 46 runner-up Charlie Davis. Welcome to the team, Charlie. Well, Jeff, I know firsthand that playing from the couch and playing on the island, completely different. So I hope you tune in every single week. We're going to dissect the strategy, the misfires and mistakes that change the game. If you want more Survivor than just 90 minutes, this is where you get it. On Fire, the only official Survivor podcast.

Listen to On Fire, the official Survivor podcast, wherever you get your podcasts.

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