Okay, so I'm recording. Ready to clap? Okay. One, two, three. Wow. That's it. But wow, what a moment. Most pleasing to me in my career. Oh, wait. I'm getting text messages on the computer now. Yeah, it's not recording that. No, it's not. No. Okay, right. We're on sound text down here at the gig. Listen, some people, okay, this is a very good example of two styles of coping.
So during the pandemic, some people learned skills, acquired skills and gained expertise in areas. Others refused to learn. And not only that, any existing knowledge they had degraded. Others calcified. It's like the worst parts of yourself, the holes bore deeper. Yeah. Like, I don't know. I know less about audio than I did before the pandemic, which is not even admirable. You went complete still Alice during that time. Yeah.
I'm like Luddite, Amish, Nell. There was in central Wisconsin, I remember there was Amish people and I like not to be ignorant when I first saw people going down the side of the street in a wagon with like the bonnets on and stuff. I remember being like, is this real? Like what's their problem? Because they're like colonial. I'm like, is this a ghostly apparition? Like I understand that the clothing has certain limitations, but the styles are unchanging, which is kind of fascinating. Yeah.
Like you can't use these fabrics or whatever. You have to make the clothes yourself, but we're not doing halters or like, you know, like we're not, or like there's a lot of ways to be modest that aren't like a blouse and a long dress. I would give them electricity before a halter. But do they do, but I've seen Amish people at the airport. So where do you draw the line? Is it, is it, is it, is it flight? Not a machine? No, I think it's just a steel bird.
I'm just kidding. I don't know. I don't know. I have no way. Wait, Amish don't go to the airport, do they? Mary, I've seen Amish people at the airport flying on planes. Of course, they just hang onto the wings and go, oh. There's a colonial woman on the plane churning butter. Yeah. Well, we've had opposite weeks. Yes, we have. You actually did the gigs that were asked of you, which is very my tea. Yeah.
And I took a page out of your book, which is fallen ill and disappeared into the wilderness. Oh, I know. It was, oh my God. So I'm in Boston now. Wait, I have to tell you though, it's beautiful here. Boston? Fall in New York City, the Big Apple. No, in New England. I took some pictures on my phone. This is not going to be very interesting to listen to, but I took some pictures on my phone.
Stunning. Stunning. What are you going to do with them? I'm going to jerk off to them later.
The foliage. I know you love that foliage. It was picturesque fall foliage. And it was like, oh my God. It was the thing that, you know, New England in the fall is magical. I don't care what anybody says. Don't let people tell you otherwise. Honey, I don't care if you've had your appendix out, you're prolapsed, or you're blind. New England is beautiful in the fall. And I was glad to be here in a 60 degree day with sun. I believe it.
Yeah. I'll show you the pictures later. It'll be riveting. I had to film at the Trixie Motel until the Sunday. And then I had the bright idea to film. I think I filmed Monday and went back to LA. Had the bright idea to pack for all my gigs. I was supposed to fly to St. Louis first for this college gig. And at the airport on the way to St. Louis, my fucking appendix. I don't know. I don't know how to describe the medical term, but I'm going to say go off.
I think burst. She went off like a Twitter rant, but with pain. It was like, and another thing, bitch. Like it just compounded. It was the Twitter threat of medical pain. Yeah, it was almost a four hour flight and I was stuck in seat 1A. The bulkhead seat. Which is the worst seat. Oh God. Is it really? I think so. There's nowhere to put anything. Oh, I see. You can't really stretch out your legs because there's a wall.
You know, so I'm just doubled over in the seat, like knees to the chest going, oh, the most pain I've ever felt my entire, entire, entire life. Really? Entire life. I couldn't even know pain could feel like that. And then we land and I go, I'm just going to go to sleep because maybe it's just upset stomach and I'll get over it. Are you serious? So I went to bed and I went to, I slept for 40 minutes and woke up in worse pain. And I was like, we have to go to the hospital. We have to go to the hospital.
So I had to go to the ER and because of COVID it was understaffed and not enough beds. I had to sit in that waiting room for five and a half hours in extreme pain. Five and a half hours. And guess what the fucking commercial playing on the TV was? What? We have more and more testimonials coming in from people who have turned their lives around by restoring their hair.
And not just hair restoration, but these bitches were shady. There was this one that was like tired of the constant battle, comb over, expensive hair plugs. Some people have just given up and live bald altogether.
That was the tone. Yes. Some people have thrown their hands in the air, given up and just flung themselves off a bridge. Yes. Say something. I'm giving up on you. Like that is so intense to on a TV. And there's, of course, women crying. And I understand women losing their hair is a different thing. It is totally different thing. But these men being like, look, it's real. You can touch it. It's my hair grows. The best part is it's my hair. It's my hair.
They kept being like, it's my hair. I'm like, yeah, it's your hair. But like to make it sound like to not have hair is this like some people have just ripped off all their skin and rolled in salt. It's a ghastly, ghoulish affliction from which there is no alternative lifestyle. It
It is perfectly acceptable to be a bald man. Has been for a long time. No one cares. Nobody cares. Nobody fucking cares. And I almost felt like secondhand predatory. Like I was like, I understand we all have to make a buck, but making somebody at home, like at 4 a.m. watching this feel like they should literally kill themselves because they don't have the same head of hair they had at 20 is really a lot. It's a lot. It is a lot. That was a lot, Robin. So wait, you had to wait.
You had to wait in the... That's why, see, it's funny. I'm more horrified of going to the hospital than I am about the pain because I know what is the hospital is waiting. Waiting. Not getting like... I figured, oh, they'll... I'll have to wait an hour. Oh, it'll be like an hour. It'll be 90 minutes. Mary...
Mary, five and a half hours of me going, oh, and then I remember I was like, oh, and they were saying that shit about bald people. And I went work. I was just like kicking me when I'm down. You should have said you had chest pain because I think they immediately see you because they think you're having a heart attack. Well, they're like, what's your pain level? I go 10. I said, this is the most pain I've ever been in my entire life. I said, I can barely stand. I almost couldn't get in the Uber. I was called 911 10. This is the worst, the worst, the worst.
So then I get in there and you're not screaming. You're, it's, you're a five. Yeah. Then they put you in the cat scan machine and they scan you. And you know, I've been sick for like a week and a half. I've been missing other gigs because of this. Right. Right. So then they scan me and they go, your appendix is like super swollen. So we can either try to shrink it with antibiotics. But since you've been on antibiotics for five days for your illness, I think just cut it out. I said, well, what do you do? And they're like, it's a quick procedure. It's with like laparoscopic surgery and we can do it at 10 o'clock in a few hours. I'm like,
I guess let's do that. So then they give me morphine, which I just want to say does nothing.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. You weren't under general anesthesia? Oh, no. They gave me morphine in the waiting room. But I'm like, Mary, this is nothing. I was like that Judge Judy meme of her like tap, tap, tap, tap. I was like, I can still feel the pain. What are we doing here right now? I still know who I am and I know where I am. This is not working. I would wake up in four days with like a Tijuana skinny. A full head of blonde hair. And a full head of long blonde 613 synthetic hair.
Yacky. So then I get into the room and then I'm so scared of like general anesthesia is scary. Getting put under is scary. I know it's literally a surgery that is nothing. Everybody gets their appendix out. But I was so scared. And of course they gave me the drugs and they go, this will take the edge off, which means later you won't even remember being in that room. I don't even remember going to surgery. But then it just sucks because I had to miss all of our gigs for the week. I was supposed to DJ a Spotify party. I had to miss my party at my bar. I had to miss our Halloween gigs. Yeah.
After putting all the work into the rehearsals and the costumes, anyway, it just sucked. Oh, that's right. Yes. All of that. You did a lot of rehearsals. Videos, costumes, rehearsals. Yeah. And now. Motherfucker. It'll take, you know, you have like come and go flu-like symptoms after an appendectomy. So that'll be the next like 10 days at least. It's just like chills or like diarrhea. It's just so fun and cool. So now for the Trixie Motel, which we're filming this week, I have to do like caftans and stuff because I can't even do like compression wear. Yeah.
You should work into a diarrhea storyline. Ooh. I'll say this, though. I'll say this. There's something they don't tell you about getting really sick. You do lose weight and you lose it quick. I'm not recommending you get sick. I'm recommending because I finished. So I'm two weeks out from the marathon. So I was supposed to be two weeks out. And now this happened. So I was already really thin from running. And then this happened. And I saw a picture of myself in this hospital. And I was like, bitch.
Honestly, work. Like, get on a red carpet now, bitch. Let them have it. I look like fucking elf on a shelf. Bald elf on a shelf. Throw a gown on that fucking dying woman and get her in front of the cameras. Get a bolt of fabric down here immediately.
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But I want to know. So anyway, that's my tea. I'll be sick for another week. And you know that I love, if I'm even inconvenienced, I talk about for five years. So I bet we will be hearing about my health journey for about six months. No, I think it's great. I'm just really interested in the fact that it took like, it took a medical emergency to, you know, but you would been, you've really been sick for. People think I miss Netflix because of my appendectomy. I was sick.
You were sick. We're actually sick. And then the Trixie Motel, I've just been dead on my feet because I was sick. But with all these contractors and renovators, I can't cancel like, no, you know, celebrity guests and stuff who are coming in from LA. I'm like, I can't just, sorry, bye. But don't you think it's a diarrhea storyline or like a fainting moment would be like really hot for TV. My drag name is diarrhea storyline. Um, so what happened at the gig? You had Saturday, the Boulay brothers ball.
Yeah, that was well, they were so they were horrible. Just kidding. But I wanted to say it. I know. It is. Okay. I feel I want to say this. I am so grateful because especially that Boston gig we've done is that we've done it a million times. You feel like Beyonce. The crowd is so amazing.
I don't personally understand how anybody could be in that place. It is so crowded. It is so hot. It is so packed. It is so like sardines. It's like, it's the only place I can be in that environment is on the stage. So thank God I get to do that. But it is, Mary, it was, it was lit.
what was not lit at all, nothing, not the opposite of lit, was going from the stage to the dressing room, soaked in sweat, to home, to the airport, and to do it all again. - It is club, another club, another, you know what? I love both these gigs. - It was. - 'Cause this is your first year doing LA.
I've never done the back-to-back and I don't think I could ever do it again. I do it every year except obviously COVID. How do you do it? Well, how do you do it? It's just, you just have to do, you do your shit until, you lip sync at the boule ball until like what, two? Literally two. And then your option is to either fuck around at the venue and go straight to the airport or like go home and shower. There's no fucking around. There's no fucking around. Oh. So you like go home and shower and then, yeah. Or what? There was, I was like, there is, there's,
Only going home and showering. If I had to go to the airport after the state I was in. Would it have been like Charlie Brown, like pigsty, like a cloud? Imagine that, but like aged 200 years. Like, because I wore, I chose to wear the, I work smart, you know? So I say to myself, okay, you sweat a lot. It's a packed gig. There's no AC. Why don't you wear a rubber suit? What were you thinking?
Nothing smart. No smart thoughts. But here's the thing. I got fixated. I got fixated so much on this tiny detail under boob. For a venue that had thousands of people standing drunk with a smoke machine. Yeah. But I'm telling you,
I loved it. It just, it was so great. I had under boob and I wore flare jeans. Yeah. And I looked like a farm girl and it was absolutely not worth it. It was not scary. It was not Halloween-y. It made no sense. It was so hot and ridiculous and stupid, but it was fun. A farm girl. And then, yeah, it was like Lana Del Rey.
There's a part in Clueless where the teacher goes, you can hit a few balls in those clothes. She could be a farmer in those clothes. Yeah, exactly that energy. That was you. It was very that. But don't you love that venue? Because they put so much production into the Halloween ball. You really feel like a star because you're like, whoa, these massive screens and light show. Yes. The DJ decks even look like Avengers. Yeah. It's crazy. It's awesome. And Mateo was there, which is always lovely. Yeah. And Mama, downtown...
Downtown was lit. After the show, when I was waiting for just to get out of there, people were fucking crazy. This girl on the phone was like...
It was like comedy because people were angry and upset, but they were dressed like stupid, you know, characters. Like one girl was like, like a peanuts, a black girl was like a peanuts character. I forget which like Charlie Brown, whatever. And she was like, you fat motherfucking bitch, you fat, ugly ass bitch. Just screaming on the phone. Very like this message is for Rachel. Yes. Why you took me off the motherfucking schedule.
But in like, dressed as like Snoopy or something. It's so funny. And then on the drive home, we would look at a bus stop. It'd be one person just like with this crate. I was just so magical. I love that. And then I had the- So then you went home and showered. Went home, showered, repacked. Here's the thing though. You have to lay the shit out that's soaked in sweat. You got two hours. You don't taste that. You don't smell that? Yeah.
You don't taste that shit in your mouth? Because I was like, oh, I didn't think this through. I have to wear the same thing. A smart person would have been like, well, first of all, no rubber suit. But then at least if you're going to insist on the rubber suit, you'd be like, maybe a change of clothes so you don't pack fucking moldy whatever. So I'm not just locked and loaded with a yeast infection? Hello. So go to the airport. And I had a very strange experience. What is it?
I had the most delicious breakfast I've ever had in my entire life. At the airport? I mean, sorry, on the airplane. Oh, on the jet blue? On the airplane. Jet blue. Did they turn it? They turned it so hard in a breakfast way.
I can't. Is it flat down seats? Flat down seats? Flat down seats. Mama, I had the breakfast. If I could eat this breakfast for the rest of my life, I would say, yes, God, please, every day. Yeah. Please. And then I slept five hours of lovely, gorgeous, uninterrupted sleep. So that helped a lot. But this breakfast, I want to shove it on my ass. Yeah. Yeah.
And I've never felt that way about any food product ever really. You know? Yeah. But it was great. My appetite has been gone for like 10 days and it still hasn't really come back. So I'm taking a page out of your book. What are you eating? I'm taking a page out of your book. I'm doing like a juice or a juicer and a shirt. And then I'll have like in the evening, I'll have like one real meal. Like one day in Milwaukee, I had Jimmy John's. One day I had noodles and company. Like it's...
It's coming and going, but honestly, I don't want my appetite to come back the way... My human appetite was already too much. I'm ready to just be hungry three times a day. Yeah, or like, I love a breakfast, I fucking hate lunch, and then a nice dinner. But that's where Soylent comes in. It's people.
So then it's Soylent in short, like snatches in short's wig. Did you get, did you, um, in Boston, did you get to see any of the kids, the children, people, you know? Yes. It was lovely. I saw, um, Layla. Your family doesn't come, do they? No.
to your, like those big shows or anything? Nobody's, no, no, no, no. My God, no. But Layla's parents were at the show in the dressing room. Layla McQueen. And I was like, Layla McQueen, her parents. And so I would go back into the dressing room. It's like pretty, like pretty chaotic. And I noticed these two old people who were like wearing wigs and being weird. And I'm like, who the fuck are these old people? And just like,
Like an hour passes and I'm like getting annoyed. And then Leila's like, oh, by the way, these are my parents. I was like, okay, that makes a lot more sense. Because it felt like two, like not homeless, but just random people wandered into the dressing room and decided to stay there all night long. It was so weird. But they were so sweet. And it was Bob. It was Leila, Bob. Oh, J. Joe Lee. So neat. Leila was in the show? Yeah.
- Yeah. - A work. - Yeah. Fina. It was like a huge, I mean, the show was crazy. It was so fun. - The Boulets who we vocalize that we hate. - The Boulets Brothers. - We should start a beef.
Well, I think I started it because I just they the toilets on the second floor weren't working. So I would just shit in my hand and then their costumes were always like around. So I just put the shit in their wigs. Yeah, I'm going to start a beef right now. Boulez, it's November 1st. Have an annual forecast is 364 more days of irrelevance.
Burn, honey, burn. Burn, you know what? Burn, sweetie, burn. Halloween is once a year, but a gym flow, a work hustle, a workflow gym hustle. What do you know about heaven? The grind never stops. The grind never stops. I flew out of that operating room into a split.
Are we still beefing with the Boulets or is this turned on to something else? Oh, this is turned on to something else. Okay, I'm back. Okay. Sorry. I do love... Bob asked... She was like, I have a joke about the Boulet brothers, but I don't know if they have... I don't know what their sense of humor is like. And I was like...
Don't do it. I think they have a good sense of humor. They do. They are great people. This is my boule's joke because everybody's always unsure about which one is named which one. And I think saying the big boule and the little boule is a little crazy. No. People say the big boule and the little boule and I'm like, they have autonomy. It's like the big dipper and the little dipper. Yeah, I guess that's true. But I always remember it. The tall one's Drac Morda because the other one can fit swan through the other one's legs.
That is fucking hysterical. That's how I remember it. That is so funny. The swanthula, other one's legs. That is... And every time I meet them, I have to go, okay, no, no, no. It's like a nursery rhyme, like April, June, and November. Hey! Okay. Yeah. Okay. It's very that-y. Actually, I will never forget. That is a really good device to remember that. The swanthula, other one's legs. Swanthula. You know what? This has given me some revisionist history on my forecast for Halloween in general.
I'm cool for the summer to do like two days. What? You what? Like I was, if I was healthy, I was supposed to do what? Five days in a row. We don't need to be doing all that. We don't need to be doing all that. Yeah. Regardless of appendicitis and gout and cholera and all, whatever else you have, like that's not it. We don't need to be doing all that. That's not it. Well, I don't think like the, um, I don't think the flying overnight. Oh, and although the bags were late. So like there was a real delay. Yeah. Yeah.
So when we got here, we had to wait, probably wait an hour for the bags, which it was very precious time lost. So it's just, I'm not trying to do all that. I'm not either. But it's, I mean... Also, I'm trying to do like two gigs and like one number at each and that is it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, that being said, the Boston crowd is just so fucking incredible. Like once I was on stage, I was like, okay, okay.
You know, it was so, so, so, so, so fun. I'm just happy people still came when they found out I was going to be gone. They still came. Oh my God. You know, we booked at This Is It because I was dead, dead to the world. We last minute booked Saint from Dragula and Sigourney Beaver. Oh, Sigourney Beaver. Whose waist is, I'm not kidding.
Her belt is like a wristwatch and her giant, giant breasts and giant, giant hips and ass. It just it's a two hour glass. It's fucking amazing. Look it up. I got to look her up.
Apparently they said season four of Dracula is lit, crunk, and turnt. I only saw the first episode, but it really was. They really... You guys really brought it. Do they really get scary? They get scary. They drink blood and throw bricks at each other. Yes. I'm judging. I think I'm this week. I'm a judge. You're on it? I'm a judge. On Dracula? On Dracula. I'm a judge on Dracula. What exactly are you judging? Well, I can't say. Okay.
Oh, I see. Actually, this might come out. I don't know. Watch it. Let's just say, I think they announced me and Orville Peck are the judges this week. So it may or may not be like a Western vibe. Oh, so it's like, what's it, a rap challenge? These bitches are really, those Dracula bitches are on another level. Oh, no. It's not even, it's not even like... And they make a lot of it. I know. The level of creativity is nowhere near, like, it's just...
Way beyond drag race, let's just say. It's also crazy because drag is an alternative art form, allegedly. And then this is alternative drag within an alternative art form. It's an alternative sect of a subculture of a whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like to be spooky. I never have an inclination to be scary.
I just want to see them eat bugs. I like it when they eat bugs. Bitch, they tattoo them. They really go off. I mean, listen, I don't want whatever the award is. You're not putting me in the ground with bugs in a coffin. No, what's the prize? Although I bet it's probably comparable to Drag Race. It's $100,000. Are you fucking serious? Yeah. I mean, I get it. I get it. I get it. Listen, I get it. And now that I'm a professional drag show judge...
Oh, that's right. The cat's out of the bag. And also, we now know the news. The last time I was healthy, London. Yes, I'm judging Queen of the Universe. Queen of the Universe. Alongside my colleagues, Leona Lewis. Vanessa Williams. Vanessa Williams. And Michelle. Michelle Rodriguez. Michelle. Michelle Visage.
You know what that show made me think of, though? I can't say anything, but it did make me think of how blithely unaware I am of drag in other countries in general. I just think of drag as like an American art form. I know that that's probably wrong, but my references for drag are American drag queen. So I forget about like a drag queen in...
I don't know. Peru. Yeah. I never, never think about it. And then you don't think about like the cultural differences. Like we talk about the difference between like LA and New York Queens, but it's that times a million when it's like another country. Yeah. Do you remember, have you seen that video? It was like a viral video of a, of a, I believe she was a Thai drag queen who did a really spooky performance to, I will always love you with an, with the, with the hair that came down. Yes. Yes.
That's that's what that's whenever I think of drag that's not American. That's what I hope for. That's what your point of reference is. Yes. I just love that so much. I think of. Yeah, that's pretty. That's pretty up there. You know, I messaged this. It was Halloween and I messaged Eva Destruction because are you aware of that iconic Eva Destruction number? The laughing track?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, she invented like that clown look to that number. Really? Yeah, she was the first person to do that. Oh, she was the first person. Okay. But like for some reason that number translates and speaks to everyone. So drag queens everywhere will do a clown look and do the laughing track. And like whatever. No one owns songs. I hate it even on a local level how it's like that's her song. Like whatever. Unless Britney Spears is here doing it, it's not her song. Right, right, right. But –
I messaged Evelyn was like, how do you feel on Halloween every year when you see literally your number you invented just being done everywhere? You know, what she's saying, what she's saying. She just was like, it's just, she was just like, it's crazy. I mean, I can't really feel any way about it because it's constantly being done. So that is weird. Yeah. It's like, um, I suppose it's, what would be the equivalent? It's like, I don't even know what the equivalent is. The other like drag songs that everyone does will be like the get on up, but like,
That's not even a unique POV. That's just a song. Yeah. It's just a song. Yeah. Like it's a, it's a, like if you saw someone doing, I don't know, the log lady knock on wood. What would you say? I did. So I, I saw somebody doing a mix that I like, like copy it from the internet or it stole the file.
probably copied it from the internet. Like I, like a spoken word mix into like the exact thing. It was like a spoken word part into a thing and then to another song. And then it just did the whole, put it together like that. And I was like, and I was in the audience and I was like, and I'd been performing that for like five years. Yeah. It was so strange. It was like, you're like, what are you, what are you doing? Also there was a song in Russian. Yeah.
You know what happened to me once? And this is horrible because I don't even remember the girl's name. One time I was touring clubs in the UK like five years ago. And apparently this girl opened for me and did that number. That's like first I did it. I can't do it alone from Chicago. Yeah. And she would put in like I think I don't know what she did, but she put in like the Macarena or iconic dance. Yeah. And I she opened for me and did that. I didn't know that. I thought I thought of some brilliant original material. Yeah.
So then when I toured the UK like two years later and did that as an opening number, people were like, did this rich, famous drag queen really lift a number from her opener and then tour it in her country two years later? And I felt so bad because I would have – by the way, if I thought somebody had done that, of course I would have never done it. Right. And I especially wouldn't do it in their country after they toured with me.
But I had no idea. Who do you think you're fooling? Like, who would you, who are you fooling? Yeah, I felt bad, but I had no idea. And I was just like, especially on a local level, like a local drag queen is the last person you should steal anything from. So even if it's accidental, I was like, I feel so shitty. Right, right. If you're going to steal it from her, you're going to, you should buy it from her. Yeah. Versus like someone stealing one of your numbers. It's like. What's homage then? Yeah. Cause you're like kind of known. Well, I don't want to say known.
People watch out for you. Bitches, you know, bitches beware. No, bitches actually beware. Yeah. Well, speaking of that, I was hoping to, I was really hoping to go put my, you know, what and something else in the drag this weekend. And it did not, Mary, nothing of the sort. It did not occur. It did not occur. Nothing of that nature even remotely occurred.
It was nothing going on. There's none of that, like, I don't know. It's all online, I guess, which it always has. But at least before there was Jacques. So we go over to Jacques after the show. Well, isn't it Grindr now? I mean, that's where the people are meeting up with the girls. Nobody's on Craigslist. Nobody's doing that. Well, because, right, because they don't do it anymore. Casual encounters doesn't exist anymore, I guess. So we went over to Jacques to just do a little tiptoe. A little tiptoe, tiptoe. Just dead. You went and dragged to Jacques? Just dead.
Yeah, because the show ended at like 10 o'clock. So we just tiptoed over. I got in the dumpster. I got in the dumpster, same lovely smell. And it was just so disappointing. There was not one man in there giving me like a sideways glance or like a shifty, like, it was very sad. Did you go up to your apartment and knock on the door?
No. Let me in. Yeah, let me in. I used to do the bathroom. I used to live here. No, because they kicked out the person. They kicked... It's a whole... There's a drama. Drama. They're turning him into like, you know...
Crazy condos because that the rents in that fucking neighborhood bitch out of control. I was talking to a bartender in Milwaukee and they were like Halloween this weekend was so crazy. They were like this one patron was drunk and belligerent and knocked off my glasses. And he said I had to Spartan kick them out the door. And I said, what is a Spartan kick? He said, when your foot lands flat on their chest and they fly backwards. And I said, oh, like from 300. I said, why did you do that? He goes, because he knocked my glasses off. I said, then how do you know it was them?
Blind as a bat just kicking someone in the chest like serves you. Probably an old woman who was like, can I use the restroom? Boom.
We talked about Eden should get a rage problem. So instead of being helpful and doing assistant duties, she's just beating the shit out of people. She flies off the handle. Flies off the handle for no reason. I was like, where's your assistant? I thought she should be helping you pack up. Oh, she's upstairs beating the shit out of the bartender. The first thing she does at the gig is wrap her fist like Fight Club. Yeah.
Yes. Yes. Before you know it, it's just a UFC like tournament instead of a show. I thought that'd be great. Well, I think we should tell people that even though we just told them that we were going to quit the Bald and the Beautiful, we're back for quarter four. We'll be back through the holidays.
Through the holidays. We're going to finish out the year. Maybe video, maybe not. Maybe video, maybe not. We're really busy right now and we're not even together that much. So it is a podcast, but thank you all. I don't know if you clocked all the messages and stuff. I did. I love this pod. I went through the YouTube video for the last episode and I read almost every single comment and it was like overwhelmingly, no, don't do it. So, okay, I won't jump. Yeah. We're not going to jump. No, they were saying, no, don't do the pod. For now.
Don't, if you're thinking about coming back, don't do it. Don't do it, but do jump off the video. Okay. All right. Well, this was a short one today because Katya's going to the airport, but I hope you'll stay with us for the next few weeks for the bald and the beautiful. Yes. Thank you so much. And shine on everyone. Shine on.
Bye. Bye.