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Mom, Dad, I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back to school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon. Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim.
if you shop low prices for school at Amazon. Hopefully this is helpful. Amazon, spend less, smile more. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Cheers to all you tools. Crab, walk your way into the stinky dragon. Lap up our latest latte. Grand Central Crustacean. It's a mixture of Arcana cubes, tanned to cold coffee, and just a pincer of sugar.
One pour of this percolation is enough to satiate any shellfish desire. Previously our adventurers came upon the land of Carcasuc and met the mummy herself while saving her from a horde of Horduum. But now it seems they've bargained for more than they asked for at a bizarre bazaar. Pour yourself a potation, let's proceed with this pungent potboiler.
Bizarre, bizarre. That's good. Hello, everyone. My name is Gustavo Sorolla. I'm your dungeon master for our putrid party. I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow as they introduce themselves. A little role-playing warm-up question. This week, the question is, yes or no, your character thinks a hot dog is a sandwich, and why? God. No! Your character, not you. Uh, hellum.
My name is Ilka Von Brass. I am a half-elf vampire barbarian, and a hot dog is not a sandwich. I'm not giving any explanation. It's just not...
It's a hot dog. Elga's been having this argument for the 200 years that Elga's been alive. I don't know what you're talking about. Glenn Gibson here playing Chip Haney's a tiefling rogue. And heck no, that ain't no sandwich. Also, I believe in hot dog superiority. No ketchup such in my hot dog. It's only mustard and relish. Oh, I like Chip. I'm going to hang out with him. There you go. I agree.
As Barbara. I'm Chris Damaris and I play the human cleric Barney Farney. And you don't have to giggle every time you do your own character's name. I like that it brings him joy. Because he knows it's silly. That's what it is. But he's laughing at his own silliness. I like hot dogs. And the answer of yes or no? Sure. Okay.
They could be sandwiches. That's what you're saying. I like sandwiches. Okay. There we go. Great. That's good. I think Barney needs a nap. My name is John Risinger and I'm playing Matty Confucius, who's the air-cocking ghost monk, and I do not know what a hot dog is. Oh, it's an American food. It started in Germany, but we took it over and made it better and fatter. Oh, God. Are you okay?
Whoa.
Everyone make a constitution saving throw. Oh. Oh dear. I don't remember exploding frogs in the Bible. I'm going to get hurt by this frog. Six. My constitution's good, but I only rolled a three, giving me an eight. Hey, I rolled a three too. Hey. I rolled a one for a three. Wow. We are not constitutionally resolute. We all, you also did a check instead of a save in case. Oh, oh, sorry about that. Only been over a hundred episodes. It's fine.
Wow, we all roll terrible. Get them all out of the way now. All right. Is anyone like resistant to poison or immune to poison? Oh, I think I am actually. It's not disease, is it? No, poison. I think as a goose, that is actually my thing. Oh yeah, you're immune to poison. Yeah. Whoa. Can't poison if I'm dead already. So then this does not matter to you at all. I have a defense against poison.
Poisoned. Yeah, it's got a, see how it has a little eye with a shield next to it? That means immune. So to clarify what just happened, Barney is also immune to poisons. Correct. Okay. So this only affects Elga and Chip, who take eight points of poison damage. Yikes, that was a spicy frog. Achichachi, that hurt. There's a reason I don't eat anything.
What a cursed vileness is this? You look around and splat! More and more frogs are emerging from people and exploding with toxic fumes. The pestilence is spreading. We need to make haste to the seaport. Hurry, there's an exit to the northwest. Everyone make a perception check. Why do we gotta go to the seaport? To escape. It's the closest way out of here. Oh, just like, we're just GTFOing. Twelve. Twelve.
12. 17! Bad rolls, bad rolls! 7! It's okay, it's just perception. I got other eyes around me. Okay, well we'll start with Mateed, who looks up to find the exit, but they are immediately overwhelmed with the vast infected crowds and clusters of stalls. It's a very claustrophobic scene.
Elga and Barney. You notice that as people become infected by the toxic gas, they're turning into the Hordum. If you wait too long, you may be overrun by a mob of them. Chip, maybe you're powered by a hot dog today. You got a little extra perception, a little extra sight. It was a pretzel bun. You mind your surroundings and notice a system of bridges and tunnels overhead, snaking between the canyon walls, which
which might prove useful. Guys, I found a system of bridges and tunnels between the walls that might prove useful. Follow me. Thank you for communicating that so well. Oh, yeah. Okay, Chip takes point. Good to know. Y'all need to navigate your way through the bazaar and reach what you can see is a large archway to the northwest. But of course, you've got to navigate through all these things that are in your way, causing you to slow down and maybe poisoning you, question mark.
well poisoning some of us you know I might have some sort of potion this isn't the kind of poison that it like continuously hurts us it's just like one and done yeah they like Pokemon every step we take they lose like a point of damage no you're not poisoned you just take poison damage okay I got a potion of climbing and an elixir of healing if you combine them together you
You get to climb and feel good. As you're looking through your potions, three pestilent frogs leap out from a nearby cart. They're hopping towards you. It seems like with every hop, their body gets larger and larger as they're getting closer. It looks like they're ready to pop. Chip, where do we go? We run. Uh, follow me! And then I go left. We gotta go-
We gotta go north- northwest? He wants to go northwest. Northwest, which is left from here. Ish. Left-ish. Yeah. And can Barney use himself as a shield to block? Don't be a hero, Barney! I'm not. You can bring up the rear, alright? And act as a shield for us as we run. Okay. If you're at the back, then if they- Yeah, yeah, yeah. How are you all gonna navigate the three frogs that have leapt out in front of you right now? Oh, they're in our way? Yes. Oh, okay. Oh.
You know what? Mateed, immune to their poisonous, rushes forward and does a flurry of blows against those frogs. Yeah, there's three of them. Go ahead and I guess make some attacks. I will make an attack because that's what I said I'm going to do. How many flurries do you get with your flurries of blows? Now I want to make flurry. Make flurries of blows. That should be the next drink in the next episode. Don't make me grimace. Hey. Give it its freshness.
Look at this guy, he needs Mary McCheese over here. Okay, so I can actually, I was trying to, I haven't done flurry of blows in a second. It's, I take an attack, and then after that, I can do two more attacks with my flurry of blows. So basically, I can do three attacks. Oh, okay, well there's three frogs. So I'm going to smack these frogs. Hit them. Oh, thank you, thank you. One of the rare times it was on a low number and rolled to 19, which is a 24. That hits, believe it or not. You hit a frog with a 24.
I would hope they're aces low. It's so high you hit all three at the same time, right? Yeah, really. Like they're stacked up on top of each other? Five damage? Yeah, the frog deflates and croaks. 14 on the next Kermit. That's a hit. Okay.
That one's a seven. So I assume he's, he's, and then I do a 22. Matide like hops out and like in a blinding flurry of feathers and fists, uh, quickly dispatches the three frogs. Chun-Li these frogs out of here. With your arms or? No, my feet. This is feet stuff. Oh, these are feet? I like to, I like to think that Matide really likes to use their feet like primarily for attacking. So are you like leaning back on your elbows and like kicking?
Or feathers? It's like I'm bicycle kicking Blue King at these three frogs. And then knocking them out. And you can flap while you do it. So you're like... Blowing them away. And then I turn back and look very proud of myself. Elga claps. So good!
I know that in your, uh, you know, place of origin that frog legs are a delicacy, but I do not recommend that you eat these because they might poison you. I cannot be poisoned. Go ahead, nom away. I do not eat them though. Okay, yeah, you all continue scampering your way out to the northwest as Elga was very keen to remember.
As you're continuing your trek, a Horduum, who's covered in boils, is coughing and stumbling out of a nearby alley, looks up and locks eyes with you and quickly begins closing in the distance. Can I jump in? Go for it. I'll cast command and I'll say...
End point the opposite direction. Okay. I guess it's end point. I guess because I can use one word. Yeah. You have to make a wisdom saving. Looks like a DC 14 wisdom saving throw. Okay. I guess I could say flee. Well, it rolled a three on its saving throw. So it obeys and turns around and immediately flees in the opposite direction. I love to think that it's amicable. It's like... My bad. My bad. My bad.
What happens next? You're really beginning to close the distance and you can see that archway in the distance. Not too far, it's really gotten a lot closer. You see a group of locals who run in a panic down the street and knock over a precarious stack of barrels. Every cask tumbles down and rolls into a nearby support beam of a bridge overpass.
Kapow! The legs detonate and the stone bridge begins to crumble and collapse. Donkey Kong! You spot an elderly citizen trying to hobble to safety, but it's all happening so fast. Barney, one of you! I jump in to save the old person! Which one? The one in danger!
Make a... dexterity check. Okay. 18! Ooh, yeah. Chip deftly jumps out very nimbly. Good thing you were taking point as we established earlier. Is able to secure the elderly citizen. Make a strength check just to make sure you can pull them out of there. Okay. Who are you? 21. I'm here to rescue you. My name's Chip Haney. Oh dear. Just because- My grandson's name is Chip. What? My grandson's name is Chip. Are you Grandpapa?
With a 21, you're able to lift the elderly citizen off of their feet and pull them out moments before the bridge crumbles in a large piece of stone falls where you were standing just moments before. Though you may naturally be close to death, today is not that day.
Go live the rest of your life in peace and happiness. Oh, thank you. Yeah. They turn around and trip on another thing. So sad. They're totally Mr. Magoo it. But you have a very keen sense of accomplishment after doing that. As you, you know, dust your hands off, I assume arms akimbo at your waist. The party turns around and realizes there's one pestilent giant frog standing between you and your goal. It bounds in front of you with a thick thud.
blocking your path. Back down, everyone. It licks its lips with a slimy tongue and you see a ravenous look in its bulging eyes. This one's mine. Elga steps forward and swings at it with her great axe. I can't wait for this frog to eat our tiny little friend. She can eviscerate it from the inside. Yeah, yeah. She's gonna Drax it. Roll that attack roll.
15? That hits. Yeah. Cool. They ain't got no AC. This is a giant frog though, unlike the little ones you attacked earlier. 12 points of damage. You take a mighty swing with your great axe, inspired by your party's heroic actions, and cleave the giant frog in flames. Another one rebites us! Rebites the dust.
You reach the northwest archway with a sign that reads "Sla Tour Seaport". The exit is draped with beads and hanging cloth. I'm afraid I haven't been to this part of town for some time. But I do know the seaport has boats.
Perhaps we can find transport and be able to navigate further into the city without attracting unnecessary attention from citizens. So we're getting in a boat to go where? Further into the city. Oh, is this like a canal? Are there lots of rivers and things? There's not lots, but there is a...
like a canal that makes its way up and then kind of branches off into the sea. It's called Schlatter. Schlatter Seaport. So what are we looking at? What boats are there for us? Well, you're at the archway and then the exit through the archway is draped with beads and hanging cloth. It's hard to see through. Everyone make a perception check, I guess, to see what you see. Seven. Fifteen. Eight.
12. Getting better. Still not great. Nope. Barney, you notice a trample sign buried in the sandy ground nearby that reads, shoot at your own risk. C-H-U-T-E. Not like bang, bang, shoot. So this is probably going to be like a slide of some sort. Ooh. I remember when my family used to take me to the water parks. We're tieflings, so we went to a special one that had boiling water. What?
What does it say Barney? It says "Chute at your own risk" I think there's a chute Bless you What is a chute Barney? It's a slide? Oh I'll go full speed ahead Yeah yeah I was gonna say you're leading so- Cowabunga dudes! Chip bursts through the beads Make a dexterity saving throw with advantage
Well, I'm going to stop rolling. 24. Yeah, it's a 20. I guess you can't do any better than that. You step through, but perhaps because you're expecting it, you know, your feet kind of give out a little bit under you because the floor is super slick and greasy, and you begin sliding down a steep chute. It winds and curves, and eventually you reach...
the bottom. I'm not going to describe that until we get further along. It feels like this kind of a thing you shouldn't have it like a vision obstructing doorway in front of it. That helps the adrenaline. Even just like a little window you know or something. I get there's a sign on the floor. There's no OSHA here. It's really terrible. Could Elga jump through arms first?
Sure. You also go and give me a dexterity saving throw with advantage because you're expecting this. Can I also ready myself to catch her if something goes south? Sure, why not? Five and then an 18. Oh, okay, yeah. You're able to slide through arms first. Parks I've heard so much about! I've never seen something like this! She's saying this all the way down the slide. Hearing it like a Doppler effect getting further away. I've never seen something like this!
By knee? Okay, let's go. I'll go. Same drill. Make me a dexterity saving throw with advantage, please, Barney. Also going to offer to help catch him if he needs. You're just the dad at the end of the slide. Okay, here we go. Next one. That's 15 with advantage. Okay, yeah. Does Barney do any special maneuver going down or just like... I think he holds his nose and closes his eyes. Like it's an actual water slide. Wait, is there actually water involved? No, there's no water. So the sound is just...
It did feel like there was some kind of grease or slickness to the chute. I would hope so, because Barney's completely covered in metal armor, so it's just going to be... It just sparks. It just sparks. Barney's on fire at the bottom of the slide. Barney rolled a 15, so yeah, you're able to slide down, holding your nose, and pop up off the slide at the very bottom. Mateed walks forward and parts the curtain to see what's on the other side. Ha ha!
after hearing all these sounds, sees that it's a chute and opts to just fly down. Just to fly. Oh, Mateed, you're missing out on the fun. You know what? Mateed gets to fly around in ways all the time. Yeah. Doesn't really want to do it on the ground. It is dark.
Do you have like a dark vision? I do. I can see. I have dark vision. Oh, you do? Okay, great. When you park through, no one else notices because they just hop through and immediately slip, but it's pitch black. Okay. Well, I go in and I can see everything and I do a nice little maneuver through it all. It's like Thunder Mountain.
I can see everything. I see all, hear all. I can see enough. Okay. Does anyone else have dark vision? I do. I have super dark vision. Super dark vision? He explained this to me the other day, and it's actually pretty cool. I can see 300 feet in dark vision, and...
And I can also share it with y'all. Do we all have dark vision then? Yeah, we just have this dark vision crew. But like normal dark vision is like 60 feet. It's like this is like I could see even better than normal. The length of a football field. And I will share my dark vision. I will take your dark vision. That was very I declare bankruptcy energy. I declare. Wow, yeah, this is a really cool ability. I didn't know you had this. Is it a monk thing? It's a twilight.
Twilight cleric. Cleric. Not monk. Cleric. It's just a twilight thing. You know, Edward's twilight thing. They sparkle. It's so he can read his books in the dark. So you're able to make things out. It's not like seeing in the day. You're still murky, but you are able to see a little bit up to 300 feet, even though it is pitch black.
Anytime Barney's in the dark, I imagine it's like the Tom Clancy night vision noise. His eyes are glowing green. I also want to do vision blessing, which gives me advantage on initiative. You're doing that now at the bottom of the slide? Yeah. This room is extremely cold. That's the first thing that hits you when you reach the bottom, all four of you. It's like shockingly cold, especially considering the atmosphere you just left above the top of the slide. This is a weird port. I should have brought my sweater.
Everyone go ahead and make a constitution saving throw. 14. 21 for our English listeners. 23. 15. Oh, okay. All of you are fine. Yeah, it's super cold. I got it. You're just a master. Let's all describe in detail in our voices how cold it is. I can close my eyes and I can picture it. Oh, this show is silly.
What are we seeing? I'll make a perception check with disadvantage. Dude, why with disadvantage? Darkvision. All of us are just Mateen. Oh, if you want to look too, yeah. He's just the one you say wants to look around. You said perception? Yes. Disadvantage. All of us disadvantage? Even with super darkvision? Yes.
18. Doesn't matter. I rolled a 1. 4. 3. I'm a 9 with disadvantage. 15. Once again, Barney, you're pretty much the only one who can really make out too much. Everyone else, it's too murky to see with any real distance, but Barney, maybe you're more experienced with this to see a little further out. It's kind of a long room and wide kind of rectangular space.
And you think you're at the northern end of the room. And along where you are here on this northern wall seems to be like a bunch of crates. Can I inspect the crates and see...
There's anything hidden behind them or in them or any hints of like names on the crates like the letters TNT? The crates all have Carcasuk written on them. That's where we're at. Can I open up one of them? Yeah. How does Barney open up crates? Yeah Barney, let's actually get into that. That's a great question Mateed. How do you open up this crate Barney? I think what I would do is I would take my Walker Warhammer and
and just crowbar it. Smash it with a hammer. You smash the crate with your walker. Definitely TNT. And out pour some cutting utensils. There's like some cleavers, knives, hooks, some heavy duty looking scissors, saws, crowbars. Wow.
Is it crowbar, you said? Yeah. Okay. Can I pick up some scissors and crowbar? Sure. It's like when you need scissors to open a pack of scissors. Yeah, 100%. Is there any, like, weapons worth a darn in there, or is it all just house utensils? It doesn't seem like these are intended for combat.
Because not a lot of people heard my joke. Elga picks up one of the cleavers and she holds it next to her and she goes, Cleaver girl. I did not hear that. That's a good one. Cleaver girl. Cleaver girl. Clever. Is this thing on? Let me keep explaining here. Mateed takes offense to that because Mateed heard it and chuckled a little bit and that wasn't enough for you apparently. No, I need everyone's approval. Everyone focus.
Yeah. So it's just these crates in a long rectangular room. Yeah. That is cold. It's very cold. Can I pick up two knives, two cutting knives? Sure. Also quick thing that I forgot to do last time. The axe of the scarab that I got last time, it requires attunement. Yeah. Could I attune it while we're down here? Yeah, you can attune to it. Is there something special you want to do to try to become one with it or to try to attune it to yourself? Elga does this thing where because these things are so much
much bigger than her. She likes to hold it up standing next to her and just hug it because she doesn't show love and affection to a lot of things except her weapons. Except things that can draw blood. Yes. New Elgalore. Lots and lots of blood. Yeah, you feel an innate connection with your axe of the scarab.
Can I tune my Kopech? Yeah, is there anything special you want to do for that? When I went to assassin school, you know, we kind of did some Tai Chi stuff, but it was involving weapons to kind of make us one with our killing tool. So I do my like, wah, ha ha, wah. Thank you for making this an audio format. Yeah, but with a deadly weapon. Okay. And I do that. You feel a special bond with the Kopech. Nice. Is there, let me see, do I have anything in my inventory for like lighting or...
the way of any kind? I don't think I do. Yeah, what the heck is this place? Why is it so dang dark and cold? Is anyone else going to do an attunement by any chance? Just before we get to lighting the fire. I don't think I have to attune. I had to attune them whenever I quit them, but do I need to do anything? Yeah, just what special thing do you do to try to like make the item yours, you know? Well, for the Scarf of Sightless, I put it on and I close my eyes and I envision the world around me as I see it. Oh, shit.
And then for the staff of candor, I'm like, Chip, tell me something true.
Oh, oh. Ah, you're one of my best friends, Barney. Really? Yeah, yeah. All of you, gang. You guys are so great. I don't know if I trust Chip anymore. For some reason, the staff doesn't attune to you. I don't know why. Barney gets really emotional and goes and hugs Chip. Oh. I give him one of those hugs, but when he doesn't let go, I kind of look around at everyone else like this. Elga sees them hugging and hugs her axe tighter. Chip, can you help?
Yeah, yeah, what do you need? Can I whisper something to Chip? Oh. Yeah. Guys, you don't listen. This is between me and Bird. I am not listening at all. I'm totally listening. I don't think, I don't think our Bird friend likes me.
I don't think they do either, Barney. I'm trying to be friends. Yeah. No, I know you're doing your best, Barney, but you're so good at making friends. You know, you just got to feel the room, feel the vibe, and sometimes people... What are you guys talking about over here?
We're discussing how Matide doesn't really like Barney all that much. Oh, no, Matide loves Barney. Ben described this as old man and Ted Lasso ASMR. I'm just trying to make a big friend. I'm just...
Sometimes I'm not the best at making friends. You know, I don't know if Matid likes many people rather than they just accept people. Yeah, sometimes you just got to lean into it. And, you know, when they are kind of grumpy, then you just bring it back. Boom, uno reverse, extra happy. That works for me. Yeah, that's good. Thank you. I appreciate it really a lot. Yeah, yeah.
No, this is good stuff. I like this. While you guys were having that long, awkward hug, Matide was attuning to their wrappings of antique. Matide's going to pet Jacques. Oh. And do that little, like, when you, like, scruff their, like, sides, like, back and forth with two hands. You're, like, just rubbing them and makes the kitties get all, like, really excited because they like the pets. They're covered in cat hair now. Yeah. Cool. Is anyone allergic to cats? Does anyone need to make a constitution saving throw? No. I don't.
I forgot that I need to tune my robe of serpents. So I just take it and I whip it between my legs and then I floss. That's how you tune? I thought that was weird for the way I tune things. All right, everyone go and roll me a constitution saving throw. No, I have one more thing I wanted to do. Can I do it real quick? Yeah, yeah, go for it. I have my sling of sandstorms. Oh, oh, oh. And since we're in a dark room, I want to test... Nope. Nope.
I want to give it a nice test fling in this dark room that's long and send like just like a nice pebble down the hallway to see like if we get a little bit of maybe some echolocation of how long this room is, if there's something that it might hit. So what happens? You toss it down there and you hear like the pebble sounds like it bounces off of something metallic.
is the sound... You hit Barney. ...above the floor or the floor? Like, was it a wall? It's low. I would say that. Okay. It's low. Okay.
Thank you. All right. Now we're rolling for what? Everyone make a constitution saving throw. Full disclosure, God, I rolled a check and it was a four, but I realized the error of my ways, rolled a constitution saving throw and it was an 18. So do with that information what you will. Usually what we'll do is we'll take the check and just change the modifier, but you rolled again. So we'll take that. If you agree that every time you roll the wrong one, we're always just going to do a re-roll. That way you're not selectively choosing the best option. Of course. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I
I rolled a one and I'm doing bad. 11. 11 as well for Elga. Mateed, you're not sure, maybe it's the sling or something about this room. You feel super tired. You just feel exhausted. Maybe it's all the cold in this room. Okay. The cold does make people tired. Wait a second. This is like a meatpacking plant because we found a bunch of cutting tools and it's cold.
Perhaps we should open the other crates. Ah. Well, what was the constitution saving throw for? Probably because it's cold. Oh. Should we just keep walking until we, like, with our arms out maybe until we reach something that we could open? Marty might be able to guide you a little bit because he did have a decent perception check.
Just do that. Open the crates really fast. Yeah. I have the crowbar now. May I have the crowbar, please? I use the crowbar and try to pop open like a couple more crates. Of course you can. I'd love to share my crowbar with you. All right. No reason to be so eager. By the way, on your character sheet, Mateed, you should mark one level of exhaustion.
Oh. Only if you do two. Yeah, the next crate says Carcassouk TNT. Oh. It's dynamite. I'm glad I didn't hit that one. But I can pop it open, right? Yeah. All right, I pop it open. What am I looking at? You pop it open, and it's filled with similar tools to the other crate. But it says TNT? Hmm.
But marked what Barbara just said? Yeah. You look on the underside of the lid and it says Carcassouk tender and tasty meats. Oh. I knew TNT was going to stand for something else. I knew it. That's a hoodwink. I was like, cleavers and knives. There's no T or N in there. Tasty and what? Tender and tasty. Tender and tasty. Can I do a quick like, you know,
spin around and looking at all the other crates to see if they're all labeled TNT? Yes. Okay, so we seem to be in a meatpacking port. Yeah. Perhaps we should proceed forward. Yes.
Minty, I want you to keep that crowbar. I got another one right here. I pick one up. I drop the crowbar. With a hook. Barney, do you think you can guide us? You seem to be able to see the best. Here I go. Which way do you want to lead everyone, Barney? You can either go towards the east wall, the west wall, or continue straight down to the south along the middle. It's a rectangular room, right? Yeah. Can I see the ends of the walls? Yeah, it's about 20 feet wide, I'd say. Then I guess go keep going down south. Okay. So you stay in the middle and head down to the southern wall. Yeah. All right.
All right, once you get to the southern wall, everyone roll me perception checks again with disadvantage. We're all the way at the other end of the building now? Yeah, you ended up walking about 40 feet, it seems like, more or less. That's 11. Four for Elga, but I did a crit fail. Two. That is 11.
This time we'll say, I mean, it was good enough. Everyone who got the 11, which is Barney and Mateet, the two of you are able to make out here at the southern end of the room that there's a small frost-covered chest sitting here up against the wall. And just beyond the chest is a door, and there's three levers on the wall. So many 11s in here, you might think that this is quite the stranger thing. I'm shaking my head.
I'll just hover over the inspiration die. Stop. The look that Barbara has on her face when she says these jokes is this understanding of like, this is a bad joke, but I can't not make it. And I'm hoping you guys think it's good.
Can I inspect the chest? Is there a lock? Is it locked? Does it seem to be openable? I assume you mess with it with your hands and like try to... Yeah, I'm not trying to fully open it, but I'm trying to see if it opens. Yeah, you, you know, shove it around a little bit and, you know, handle it. And it seems like it's frozen shut. Oh. Huh. Could Elga come over and try to help pry it open?
Yeah, absolutely. I'll also help. Like, how are you thinking, Elga? Just, like, taking the two... It's not locked, is it? Can we tell if it's locked? It's frozen shut. It's just like it's frozen shut. Okay. She wants to, like, chip away at the ice that's, like, on the crease of it.
Uh-huh. Hold on, hold on. With just like her axe. Uh-huh. And then she wants to try to pry it open with her hands. Sure. Go ahead and make me an athletics check. 24. Man, Ilga almost rips the lid off of the chest. You know, you do have to mess with it a little bit, but you are able to pretty easily pry the chest open. And as you do so, I'm going to say all four of you make a constitution saving throw. Okay.
Heyyyy. Hey! This regular. 21. 18. That's a 7. You know, sometimes we have days like that. I'm glad it's out of combat. Yeah, yeah. Don't beat yourself up, Mateed. You're a very valued member of the team. I think you're great! Aww, isn't that nice part- Mateed?
Isn't that nice? I do not need the acceptance of other people. I love myself regardless. That's great. Very healthy. There's a lot to love. Oh, well, don't call them fat now. As you pry open the chest, Elga, a cone of concentrated cold focuses out and impacts everyone in the party. Three of you are able to kind of like bear the brunt of it, but Mateed takes a good amount of cold direct to the face. Could I close...
Close the chest it comes out and then very quickly disperses. What's the cold do the cold gives Mati 26 points of damage? Oh my goodness. Everyone else gets 13 Mati's down So Mati's not down Mati's frozen in place like a statue. Okay, okay Mati's frozen place and zero HP and this isn't necrotic or disease is no cold. Can I Barney cast aid? which
I looked into it. Choose up to three creatures within range, each target's hit point maximum and current hit points increased by five points for the duration. And because it's not healing,
It can work on people who are undead. I don't know if temporary hit points bring up someone who is a zero. It's not temporary hit points. The phrasing, I think, was specifically their current hit points up by five. So it's not... It's actual hit points, not... It's your hit point maximum and current hit points increases by five. So it's not temporary hit points. So your cup gets bigger and more gets poured in your cup. I did some research on it because I was trying to find a way to cure people. So technically that would put me at five HP while the spell is in place.
Yes. And it lasts for eight hours. Concentration, I imagine. It does take concentration. There is a ruling here from Jeremy Crawford, who... Ah, yes, Jeremy. ...is like the person who... Mr. D&D. Mr. D&D. And his exact wording is...
If something in the game gives you hit points and they're not called temporary hit points, they don't follow the temporary hit point rule. And specifically, AID says each target's hit point maximum and current hit points increases by five. It does not call it temporary hit points. Specifically, you're right, Ben. I should give him his credit. He's the lead rules designer for Wizards of the Coast. Oh, wow. Yeah, Mr. D&D. So, yes, you are correct, Chris. This would give Matitha five hit points. Okay. Turn to the book of Jeremy Crawford, chapter five, verse 13.
So five? Five. For a second or two, you know, Mateed is frozen in place in his statue, seemingly with a shocked expression on their face. This is literally just a chest in Ocarina of Time that freezes Link when you open it. That's what this was. But Barney comes to Mateed's aid and
and defrosts them. So who do you all give that to? The three of you all? Because I don't think I can do it on myself. So it's not temp HP. We just add five to our normal. You get your hit points increased by five, but you also get five hit points. Are you okay? I am okay for the moment. That's good. Merci beaucoup. I was sad when you were a block of ice. Elga, now that the kerfuffle has died down, you notice that there is something, there's a dagger inside of the chest. Elga.
Elga pulls it out. You grab it and pull it up, and everyone takes... No, I'm just kidding. I was waiting for it. This room sucks. As soon as you pull the dagger out of the chest, the room seems to start warming up a little bit. What? Ice starts, you know, dripping and melting and turning into water. Was the dagger, like...
in anything or was it just like in the chest? Just in the chest. Placed in the chest. Could I investigate the dagger or like see if there's anything like markings on it or words? It's a very unusual dagger in that it seems like it's made from a fang, like a tooth from a big animal of some kind. Does it look like a dragon? Make a nature check. Can I pull out my dragon sheet?
Paper. Didn't you give it away? No, they didn't take it. I rolled a nat 20, but minus one, so it's 19. Chris isn't upset by this. It does not appear to be so, even with the reference from your paper. He said it's from a fang. Yeah. Is this like a weapon weapon, or is this like a... Yeah, it's a fang that has been modified to be able to be used as a weapon. If you don't want it, I'm in dire need of small pointy weapons, but also you found it, so... How about I hold on to it for now, and if you need it, we'll talk. Ha ha ha ha!
Okay. This is in character. Mateed is laughing. Mateed thinks this is humorous. Sometimes Elga wants things more when other people want them to.
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You can add this to your inventory if you want, Barbara. It's labeled Fang Frost. Fang Frost. So just as a reminder, up against this wall, there was also a door and three levers. Hmm.
Oh, is there anything marking the levers? Make an investigation check. Can I investigate as well? Sure. Yeah, why not? What does range mean when it says 20 feet out of 60 feet? Like if you throw it. So you throw it within 20 feet normally, then beyond that up to 60 feet is disadvantage.
Oh, okay. It's like too far. Like the shooting the arrow thing that Kyborg had. Exactly. 11. I rolled a three. Both of you look and neither of you can find any markings on the three levels. Perhaps Elga and Chip, you might be able to decipher what is the use of these levels. I have an advantage on investigation because of my... Because you're a curious little girl. Because of my eyes of minute seeing. Minute seeing. Minute seeing. 14. Yeah, go ahead and check it out then. Come on, advantage. Okay, there's a 15 and a...
- Seven, so 15. - Yeah, both of you look and neither, I guess none of the four of you are able to find any markings on these levers. - Guys, I don't know about you, but I just wanna start yanking levers. Like what do you say we pull the left lever? - Matisse slowly steps back about 10, 15 feet. - Okay. - Barney, I guess we'll do the same and kind of like ready.
So you're just pulling one? Yeah. Elga, you want to take cover in case it explodes? Elga gets in the chest. I want you and your nice new dagger to take any damage. This is making me want to hold on to this dagger forever and ever and just go to sleep with it and think about it. Are you going to give it your special Elga hug? Yep, sure am. I'll stand in front of Mateed and Barney.
Okay. So Chip is pulling the levers. Then behind Chip is Elga. Then behind Elga, she's kind of blocking Mateed and Barney who are behind her. Yeah. Okay. Which one do you want to pull? Left, middle, or right? Left.
Left. And before I do, I say, I'm gonna say something real silly, because I don't think that I live in a world where God would make me, you know, say my last words something dumb, you know? Like, I think they would give me some sort of poetic...
cookie dough in our hair. Not blurble gerbil? Blurble gerbil, everyone. Blurble gerbil, everyone. Blurble gerbil. Blurble gerbil to you. And a good morning to you. You pull the lever on the left and all you hear like a metallic...
Even though I'm like 15 feet back? Oh yeah, it's all in the room. Everywhere. What is this meat packing room? What is this room? Did the Joker make this room?
I rolled a one. Was I able to, because I have advantage on dex. Yes. Okay. Your dangerous stance would work. They were fairly readied up too. I have basically not rolled above a 10 this entire time with any of my natural dice rolls. I rolled a five. That's 10. I was an 11. 15 for Elga. Elga's the only one who makes it. Everyone else gets clobbered by giant slabs of falling meat and takes. Because I'm small, so I was in between the slabs falling. Five. Five.
Five points of damage. Matide is down again. A giant rack of ribs falls on Matide's head and knocks him to the ground. I want my birdie back, birdie back, birdie back. I'm down to one. Man, this room is worse than most enemies we have fought. And it's just a meatpacking room. Let's be honest. It's a very dangerous profession. Gus, do you mind if I take my elixir of healing? Yeah, go for it. All right. It's 2d4 plus three. I'm going to roll those d4. Just leave.
Leave me down while you try these other levers. Is this why you got into baking? Yeah. Now I bake with meats. Meat pies are fantastic. What if we cover you guys in the fallen meat? It provides kind of like a meat shield. Just cover everybody in my carcass. Does anyone have any healing potions? I just used the last of it. I'm sorry. Normally I'd share, but I don't want to die from being, you know, hitting the meat. All right. Try another lever. Hmm.
I mean, are you guys good if I just keep on with the levers? Uh, yeah, I am. Yeah, you have the one in the middle and the one on the right. Yeah, left, right, and center. I'm gonna go... I'm gonna cast Bless. What does that mean? Uh, I didn't sneeze. Wait, no, that... I can't do that, because then we'd lose our five... You'd lose your five hit points. Okay. Because it's concentration. Okay.
I'm just gonna concentrate. Okay. Why don't you take cover under the slabs of meat, Barney? Yeah, I'll do that and get under my shield. What if we, you know, there's got all these crates around here. Why don't you guys all empty them out and then get in underneath the crates so they got, like, some protection? You pull the metal lever, all the metal goes...
We're just gonna Metal Gear Solid it and just have a crate over us. It's not a bad idea. If you want, I'm gonna hold off until you guys decide. I'll get in the box. Okay. I'm unconscious. Alright, I stuff her carcass into a box. Do you wanna get into a box? No. Okay. Nobody puts baby in a box. Alright, this could kill us. Hold my hand, Elga. Which one do you do? The center or the right? Center.
Come on. Okay, wait, hold on. I said cookie dough. Dookie cough! And then I pull the lever. It's cookie dough, but C and D are swapped. Dookie cough! You pull it, and you hear a metallic clink come from the chest. Which chest? The one that you opened where you found your very special fang. Can I check inside of it? Yeah. Make an investigation check.
You see that there's like a locking mechanism in the crate that perhaps was activated by that lever. So now the chest is locked? Or would have been. Correct. It's like if you see like a deadbolt point out, but the door's open. Oh.
Okay, well that was harmless. This would have locked the chest if we had tried the levers before we opened the chest. Alright. Good thing you didn't hide in the chest. Hello! Uh, right lever. Alright everybody, ready up, right lever, here we go. I just want to point out, I can't say this in character, so you can't act upon this. We haven't tried the door at all, we've just been pulling levers. Gorble, gorble! And then I pull the lever. You pull the lever and you hear a metallic clink come from the iron door.
Doors unlocked! Alright, let's drag Matin's carcass out. Or maybe now it's locked. Maybe we should try opening it now. Can I go check the door? How do you check it? I take my sword and I kind of poke at it and I just, from a distance, to see if I can open it. Yeah, you poke it and it begins sliding open. Doors unlocked! Can I come out of the box? You look like a cute little turtle, but yeah, you get out of there.
Okay. All right. I'm not in combat. When can I do rolls? We can make the rolls now, or someone in the party can take an action to stabilize you, I think is what they call it, and you're just at zero. Yeah, they can take an action to stabilize you. Can I try and stabilize Mateed? Is that a medicine check? Yeah, medicine check. Oh, come on, bird.
16? Yeah, you're able to stabilize Mateed. Over 10? So do they get one? Yeah. Barney, feed her like a mama bird. It's what she's- It's what they're used to. Bring her- Bring him back to health. Here, take this roll and just- Mateed is up.
Like, Mateed has been recessed. No, no, no, you need to go back down. We'll nurture you back to health. Oh, I have a potion of healing. You're still unconscious. A stable creature doesn't make death-saving throws. It does remain unconscious, though. Quick, everyone gather sticks and things to make a nest. Why don't I just carry Mateed? If you stay at this state for a while, eventually you do regain one hit point. Can we, like, do a short rest?
Yeah, if you want to, before you go through the door, I think you all could take a short rest now that the dagger has been taken out and the room's warmed up and not so brutally cold. All right. Okay. Up to you guys. Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think if you tell anyone to take a short rest, they will do it. Nobody has to pick up and lug Mateed around.
I don't think... Now I have to do a long rest to get rid of my exhaustion. I was like, does going down to death take away exhaustion? Nope. You still wake up exhausted. Oh. I'm tired. I shut the rest with Be Lovely. And I'm going to go ahead and just give me my healing. Good news, everybody. I'm at full health. Do we still have those five from Barney? I think that lasts for an hour. No, it's for eight hours. And he hasn't done a spell. Okay. So we still have that. All right. Well,
Before we go, Chip wants to take a gander outside and see if the coast is clear. Okay, so everyone's ready to go, done with your short rest, but before really going through the door, Chip, you want to peek your head through and just kind of like see what's on the other side? Sure. You peek your head through the door, and the odor of salt and raw meat fills your lungs.
You're looking at the back of a fairly vacant butcher shop. In front of you is a vendor wearing a bloody apron with a muscular chest and arms, but scrawny legs. She's currently hacking away at a juicy flank of meat with a serrated cleaver, but you notice she seems to be sniffling while doing it. She doesn't seem to have noticed you watching her.
Okay. Could Elga see if there's any blood on the ground or like dripping anywhere? Yeah, I would say that since the room is defrosting, that there would be like blood and juices in the room on the floor. Could Elga scoop up some and drink some very privately? So gross. So gross. Yes, but I don't know if that counts for your ability. Okay. I think it had to be... Fresh. Yeah, fresh. Chip poke.
Pokes his head back into the room and says, Okay, we're still in the meatpacking plant area. Elga, stop licking the floor. I'm just making sure. I thought it was water. I know we might be thirsty after such a treacherous... I know we might be thirsty. After such a treacherous journey down here. There seems to be an emotionally vulnerable butcher outside.
They have skipped leg day. We should approach with caution. Why do you think emotionally vulnerable? They seem to be sniffling. So it's either, you know, they just went through a breakup and they've been listening to a lot of the T-Swift or they're cutting onions too. Or maybe it's cold. Allergies. Maybe they have a cold that has been known to happen from time to time. It has been a little cold down here.
We should approach with caution because they do have a large cleaver. I volunteer you, Chip, with all your charisma to help us out with this. Hachi chachi, a vote of confidence from Mateed. Okay. Wolf, do you guys want to go? I agree with Mateed.
Turn it down a notch, Barney. I love when Barney interjects. Okay, so I'll walk outside. I'll make my presence abundantly clear. How are you going to do that? Hey there! It's me, Chip Haney! I thought like you were going to stomp or something, not like scream and scare the person with a cleaver. You seem to be at work, and I'm so sorry to bother you, but I'm a little turned around, and I'm just needing to get the heck out of here, you know? The butcher turns around, somewhat startled. Uh.
at your loud exclamation and looks at you and you can see it seems like she's fighting back tears.
Where did you come from? Well, we were in the town, you know, the bazaar, and then a bunch of frogs just jumped out of nowhere and started exploding. And so we had to get to the nearest escape. We went down a big old slide, and then we ended up in this here freezer. And now I'm talking to you, and you seem to be a little troubled. Unshoulder your burden on me. What's going on? Before we get to that,
What was the name of the bazaar you were at? Are we here or is it just Chip? I think it's just Chip. Do they hear it? Can they whisper? Mateed knows it and is not saying it. I know it too. It's the Chip Bazaar. You all heard the question. You all can see Chip stumbling. It's called Boniche Bazaar. Boniche Bazaar? Give yourself an inspiration, Barbara. I'm loving it. Sorry, John.
Matit in character heard that they were asking Chip and did not give it.
The problem is that I hate my job. I love animals and I can't stand the fact that I have to do this to make ends meet. Oh. Aha. I wish I could just follow my true passion. True passion. I got you. That was a delayed one, guys. I like that. I'll take it. Yeah. What's your true passion? Sailing. I'd love to fix up my old boat and just sail along the canals. Well, what can we do to get your boat fixed up? I...
I don't know. It's just so much uncertainty. Well, how much is that going to cost you? I haven't even thought about that. Yeah, I don't know. Then I'd have to stop working, find another job. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you know, do you want to spend your whole life hacking up old animals and you feel bad about doing it or you want to follow your dreams, huh? Yeah.
Are you following your dreams? Oh yeah, I kill for a living. It's great. I'm missing my wife. She seems to be gone and I can't- How could you kill? Well, I mean, I'm real good at it and I kind of, I've got, you know, I find joy in it sometimes. You find joy in this bloody work?
Yeah, because if you find bad people and you're ending their life and they're stopping them from wrongdoing, you know? We also live in a world where ghosts exist. One of my best friends is a ghost. You know, there's life after death. Oh, oh, so you only kill bad people. You never kill good people. Yeah. Mateed looks around as you mention that, just trying to find out who you're pointing at. The ghost friend? Should we just...
silently close the door. Mateen is nodding their head and just helping you close this. Back to my question, though. How much is that going to cost you to repair their boat? It's not so much the cost, just the time. Sitting down, not working, and putting the effort into it. And yeah, Barna, if you heard me, you can go in if you want. I just want to say that life is short, and you can go your whole life dreaming of what you want to do and working on it.
And before you know it, it's almost over. So I wouldn't, I would, don't, don't hit that meat all day. Yeah. Hey, what's, what's your name, by the way? My name is Pamila. That's a beautiful name. The name of a sailor. And what kind of creature was this? Some bizarre looking humanoid person wrapped up in wrappings like a lot of the other citizens here in Carcasuc.
You know, you're right. She takes a long, hard look at Barney. I should get going while I still can. I'd be happy to help you fix up your boat. I'm a bit of a carpenter. Yeah, he's got like mending stuff. Magic. Oh, there's no need. I'm already so indebted to you for giving me the confidence to go about my ways. Here, in fact, take this. She reaches into her pocket and puts 10 silver pieces in each of your hands, Barney and Chip.
I give him back. No. I couldn't possibly accept this. Yeah, you need this. Oh, you're too kind. Thank you. I'm gonna go and release all the animals in the seaport and go fix up my boat and set sail right away. Ahoy, matey. See you later. I'll take the silver if nobody else is going to. No, no, no. She needs it to survive. She runs out the door. Okay, bye-bye. Perhaps we should follow this person because we are in need of procuring a boat ourselves.
Oh, yeah. Hey, Pamila. Pamila's gone. Okay. Do you want to do a quick look around the room in case there's anything else in here? Yeah, it's just like a quaint shop with rustic wooden shelves, an array of carefully curated cuts of meat. You know, the front of the shop's like a large glass window looking out to the street where there's like a pen of livestock.
And the lettering on the window reads, Pamayla's protein. Mateed, you, you know, quickly see what's going on and try to follow Pamayla. But she has bound out the door and down the street. Just passed all the animals she was supposed to release. Beyond the butcher shop, there's a pair of long streets that are now filled with bleeding, bellowing livestock. You name it. Camels, mules, boar. They're all out and about as Pamayla runs down the street, letting them out.
Cackling. At the end of the roads to the south is a seaport docked with a few boats. Well, guys, we're going to the seaport. We've got to find a boat. Do you think Pamela would allow us to join her? You guys became such quick friends. Yeah, it's worth a shot. What the heck? Do we see which boat she got on? She got onto kind of a small dinghy and is currently rowing out from the seaport. Is the mummy still with us? Yes. Is there a boat you think we should take?
Mommy? Oh, absolutely. I'm sure we can commandeer some rowboats down at the seaport.
Oh, okay. Can I look around and see if there's any ones that are damaged or not being used? So the seaport's like at the end of the road. We gotta go down these roads. Right, you all are still at the northern end of the road. All right, let's start power walking down that way. Everyone roll me perception checks. 22. 16. Good lord. 6. 16. Just not my day for rolling. It's because you came out of the dark so quickly, so your eyes are still adjusting. Dialing.
pupils. I stepped on a crack or something. Got cursed. Everyone except for Mateed notices like an acrid, smoky smell to the air. Can we look and see if it's like in the wind or anything? If it's coming from one area? Make an investigation check, Barney. Thirteen. It seems like it's coming from up above. Are we getting at seven deadly sins or not a seven deadly sins? What is it all like the
Frogs. The plagues. You look up and storm clouds seem to be forming overhead and a hail of fireballs begins raining from the sky throughout the seaport all around you. We better get out of here before the firstborn is taken. That's a nasty plague.
yeah let's let's let's like hustle to the to the boat looks like we're gonna have to make our way down this road yeah we start going northwest is there any like wagons or anything that we can speed this up with yeah there are like some carts that you feel would probably be pulled by beasts of burden which are now out running around wildly in the street trying to dodge fireballs that are falling from the sky do any of that look nice that'll be the best that look nice or no no beats like nice friendly beats
Sometimes they might have been nice, but right now they're all panicked and beginning to run around wildly. We just run? Yeah, it's just fun. Yeah, you begin running, which seems to spook some of the livestock even more, and they begin running too, like running alongside you wildly. This is about to be a Noah's Ark situation.
I was thinking more like Lion King, like wildebeest stampede heading down that way. Very much that way. Everyone, for fun, let's make a dexterity saving throw. Jeez. 11. Do I see this, though? Yes, you have advantage on this one. 24. Oh, Matide, look at you. 20 for Elva. Chip and Barney, some of the larger livestock kind of bump into you all a few times, roughing you up, you know, bruising you in the ribs a little bit.
So each of you takes one point of damage. Lame. Move. Lame. Hush. Okay. You've already, like, taken us down to, like, nothing. We're so soft. Oh, fine. Everyone make another dexterity saving throw. Hush. The fireballs are falling all around you. Oh, so we're actually doing another dexterity saving throw? Are we actually? Yeah. 20. Yes. 21. 22. 22.
17. I hate you all. Okay, yeah, you all are able to effectively dodge out of the way of the fireballs that are falling from the sky all around you. You run and you see docked in the harbor there's a pair of rowboats being looked after by a guard. We can take these rowboats, get out of the seaport, and travel the Kahurian canals to the northeast. Karen canals? Run up to the guard. What's your name?
Who are you? What's your name? It's really strange when the elderly just run up and go, what's your name? Son. People call me Roddy. Roddy. Quickly. We need to escape the entire...
Villages being overrun by animals and fire. I can see. What happened? I don't know, but we all have to leave. Let's get in these boats and run. We'll make sure you're safe. We're expert rowers. Come on, Rowdy. Let's go, Rowdy. Come on. We can't go. You don't want to lose your life. Rowdy, come on. Let's do it. Do it. Make a persuasion check with advantage. Just because Chip was yelling, do it. Do it. That's a 19. Rowdy says, oh.
Uh, okay. He throws down his sword and begins releasing the moorings of the rowboats. That a boy, Roddy. Keep your sword, you might want it. And I give it to him. And he gets it.
And then can we all get in the boats? Yeah. Come on, new guy. Roddy goes to jump onto the boats, and as he does so, a fireball from the sky falls down and hits him and knocks him into the water. Oh, Roddy! He sinks to the bottom of the canal, unmoving. Oh. Oh, my goodness gracious. I salute for just a second, and then we get around the boat. So is he dead? Yes. Could I dive in and bite him? Ha ha ha ha ha!
There you go. Sure, you can try mouth-to-neck resuscitation. Don't be a hero, Elga! No, I need to save him! Be right back! Elga, no! No, she's just doing good. Oh, she's giving him mouth-to-mouth. In the water! What a brave young lady she is. You dive into the water, and as you do so, you see Roddy pop back up out of the water as a Horduum, and he begins slowly starting to shamble over towards the boat. You did it! Way to go, Elga! He's fine. Can I do my bite?
of sucking sure uh i'm gonna use my inspiration die on that one because i only rolled a nine
It's 25. Oh, yeah. It successfully hits. During? Or attaches or latches. Sick points of damage. Yeah. You're able to latch onto the Horduum, formerly known as Roddy, and drain its life force. You get HP for that? The bloodthirsty bite gives you. Oh, okay. That's a form of my bite of sucking. This one just procs your need to do that. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Mateed is already rowing. Okay. Guys, I have bad news about Roddy. Oh, no, don't.
Tell us. Give it to us straight, doctor. He didn't make it. He was bleeding everywhere. I don't know how drowning would do that, but it did. It's probably because Barney gave him his sword back. Oh, Barney. It's all my fault.
I'll go get back in the boat. Okay. You all embark onto the canal, spire continuing to fall from the skies, but as soon as you leave the port, you notice the blazing hail does not seem to follow. You follow the coastline for a few minutes until the channel turns and you pass under a few bridges. A cool wind sweeps through your hair and feathers and the lapping of water against the boat makes for a soothing rhythm. Splash, splash, splash.
Roll, roll, roll your boat. Chip me down the stream. Elga looks at Chip. Merrily, merrily. For the first time since you entered the desert, you notice your sore feet feel cool. In fact, they feel wet. You look down and realize that your boat is taking on water. Uh-oh.
Faster and faster, the boats flood with water, and before you know it, you are sinking into the canal. You struggle to swim to shore, but the water feels thicker. Your breathing becomes hurried, and you can't seem to stay afloat. That's when you notice the color of the water has turned crimson red. Find out what happens on the next week of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Sounds like Elga's going to have a great day. Yeah, yeah. Ha, ha, ha.
It just comes out like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka, but she's red. All right. Thanks for listening, everybody. It was a real fun episode. Get on in the water. It's great. We'll be back next week with another new episode.
Oh, we've seen a lot of posts on social asking about where they can get Stinky Dragon Dice. They are now in the Rooster Teeth store. Store.RoosterTeeth.com. Barbel, garble. Barbel, garble, everyone. I have this lovely little green felt bag and they look beautiful. With the logo, Stinky logo. There's a limited number of quantity. Yeah, they all sold out at RTX, but we saved half of the batch for sale online for the folks that could make it to Austin. So if you are interested, go order them now because...
they will sell out. Also, quick update. While Chris and I are still working on the big puppet show, you might notice that the puppet videos are going to slowly be replaced by animated videos, which are cool, on our social. We've got our team of animators who are working on RTA here at Rooster Teeth. They're going to be working with us on cartoon versions. So tune in for those. They're a lot of fun. They're very cute. And that's basically just to pull back the curtain. We don't have the ability to work on both the long-form puppet
show that we're working on and the mini versions for social the puppets are real divas they won't work at a time so yeah fortunately we have our awesome animation team that's helping us with that workload go check them out socials are at stinky dragon pod
This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst, written, edited, and composed by Micah Reisinger, with additional editing work by David Sanya. And this week's Arrow question was submitted by user WolfMarauder39 on Reddit. Here's a quick shout-out to some folks that interacted with us on social media recently, and here are some NPCs named after them in this episode. RydaWajad, aka TheMummy, named after user Ryda7s on Reddit.
Pamela the Butcher, named after user Uncrystallized on Twitter. Also want to give a special thanks to some friends who provided voices for those characters in this episode. Ryder Rajad, the Mummy, voiced by Hannah McCarthy at hihello underscore Hannah. And Pamela the Butcher, voiced by Emily Weeks at Emily Weeks. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.