#76 - Page Kennedy
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Welcome everybody to Stavi's World, 904-800-STOV.

Call in, we'll solve your problems. Very happy to have on the pod, on the couch today, Paige Kennedy. Dude, thank you so much for coming. Hey man, thank you for having me, brother. I appreciate it. No, I love it. We do a lot of stand-ups here. It's cool to get, you've had an accomplished career, obviously, you're an actor, rapper, all that stuff. But truly, the quickest way on this podcast is to be in a movie where a guy kills a shark with a samurai sword. Ha ha ha!

My love, literally, we started DMing on Instagram because we just talked about The Meg on here. And I was like, I was telling Elders how I got fucked up and watched The Meg. And then you were on it. You were in it. And then you DMed me. You're like, dude, thanks for the shout out about The Meg. And I was like,

Hell yeah, dude. That shit rocked. I love it, man. I was like, hell yeah. Yeah, dude. That's what's up. That's our entry point. I love it, dude. Big ass sharks. I love it. The big sharks. Ha ha.

It was awesome. Hey, fellas, that's what you do. You trying to holler at us and start bringing up big-ass sharks, you know what I mean? Yes. If you've been in trashy action movies, you are welcome on this podcast. I want that known. I want that on record. And I want to say, you know, let's start with some Meg. I liked it in Meg, too. They got you out there, too. They got you killing shit. Man. Because in the first Meg, you were... I was a pussy. They had...

They had you in there. You were the fucking tech guy. Yeah, man. I was the voice of what? The audience. Yeah. Because the audience is like, no, don't go to the church. You were the Greek chorus of the Meg. That was me. And then it was like, this is kind of weird that I had a black guy know how to swim. Well, it was funny because I felt like they tried to like,

like, flip the trope of, like, the Jack Black dude is actually, guess what? He knows computers this time. He doesn't... And then on the second one, they're like, nah, he's gonna kill shit, dude. It's like... Because I feel like usually on the action, like, the second one where they take, like, a secondary character and put them in the action, it's funny because it's usually a computer dork. Mm-hmm.

But it's like you just made more sense to be out there to begin with. But they had you in like, you know, glasses and a polo and shit like that. But it was great. Love it. Yeah. I mean, listen, bro. When they, when, because before, before they started, like I had,

Like I was in the gym. Yeah. I was sending. Yeah. You were like, they're like, we want you for an action movie. So you're like, I'm doing steroids. I'm going full. I'm on full Kumail Nanjiani in the Marvel universe. Right. Shout out to Kumail. He got jacked as shit. We'd love to have you on Kumail if you're listening. But yeah. Come on, dude.

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Download game time today. Last minute tickets. Lowest prices. Guaranteed. You went through the Marvel, like, you were like, I'm going to go. I'm going to get jacked. And then they were like, oh. And then I started sending them pictures and shit. And then it's like, oh, okay. That shit worked. That's awesome. Yo, my little ruse worked. That's awesome. Yeah, so they fixed it. And so when I saw, you know, and you know what the crazy part about it is? You got to see, I don't know, maybe like,

five, six, seven renditions of what it was before. Totally. I did other, like, even more cool shit before. Oh, really? Yeah, they couldn't, you know what I mean? I was doing too much. It's like, all right, you're not Jason Statham. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Relax. Chill, dude, yeah. But no, man, that shit was cool as hell to get in the script and then to see me be able to

Kick ass. Yeah. And still be funny. Was that your first, like, action... Straight action role? Because I mean, like, I know you from, like... Well, it was funny because I realized, like, all this shit. You're, like, a classic, like...

like character actor in that when you dive in you're like oh this motherfucker's been in a ton of shit right you know where it's like because like i didn't even realize i was a big weeds guy oh you know when i was in college because i was uh i was a weed guy it was still weeds came out when weed was illegal yeah it's funny i've become an old guy where i'm like kids i don't know if you know this you could you had to buy weed from the most annoying white guy with dreads you've ever met in your life back when i was in college

But I just remember watching it and I was like, oh, fuck. He was in, you know, you're in. And so, but I do feel like you, it edged like more comedic, like Blue Mountain State also. Another one. You watch Blue Mountain State? Oh, my brother loves. I mean, that's another. Wait a minute, man. It looked like you walk in a room with other motherfuckers watching and you're like, oh, what's this shit? No, no. I've watched it. I mean, I loved it. And also another connection to Trashy Action, the man who plays Reacher was.

He's like the fucking biggest thing in the world now. Let's get you in Reacher season three, bro. Let's get another Blue Mountain State alum in Reacher season three, dude. Get me on there. Come on, Alec. I auditioned for season two and y'all went with an old ass white man. So y'all got a chance to make this shit up in season three. What were you auditioning for, bro? Do you remember?

It was one of the villains that they hired, like a 55-year-old white man. Well, they hired Robert Patrick from, the main villain was the Robert Patrick from Terminator. Oh, maybe that was it. Yeah, yeah. That's better. Sorry, man. That's a better get. No disrespect. You got to get the Terminator, the guy from Terminator 2, bro. I love you, but give me Robert Patrick as the main guy. Fair enough.

And you know, they do that a lot. I mean, I've auditioned. The only Marvel thing I ever auditioned for was in, I don't know if I should even actually say it, but a much more accomplished comedian got it. Like a much funnier, more talented person got it. And I was like, all right. Was he kind of like you? No, not at all. Oh. That's the thing. If it was a fat white guy, I would have been pissed off. It was, I mean, it was, I'll just say it was, whatever. Just a better looking guy.

Funnier guy. You thought we was going to get it and then you still pussied out and didn't tell us. Yeah, yeah. It was funny because you get a big... I mean, I'm not an actor. I mean, I'm trying to get into it, but you get a big audition like that and immediately you're like...

What do you get? I'm not getting the fucking Marvel movie. They're going to find my pot. The second I get cast, it's a Disney thing. They're going to find all the dumb bullshit. I have hundreds of hours of fucked up shit that I've not really said, but laughed at. I'm a big laugher and fucked up shit.

And I was like, I'm not getting this. And so I just did it real quick. And then they were like, even my agent was surprised, which is disrespectful. They're like, they actually really liked your audition. Yeah, we just did all your ad lib and gave it to the person that they're going to give it to. Yeah, that's true. Thank you very much. Yeah, they were like, thanks for punching up this script. You're so right, dude.

Because I worked hard as fuck on it. And I was like, wait, really? They liked it? And they were like, yeah. But then, of course, it just goes to a much more handsome guy who's becoming a movie star. And I'm friends with. But anyway. So I'm not happy. I just signed something. So I don't want to say. You can't. But I'll tell you after. It will make no sense. You'll be like, what? Why were you guys even up for the same thing? But anyway. Yeah, let's get you. But anyway. So was that your first action thing? Like getting to really kick ass? Well, yeah.

I was in SWAT. You remember that movie? Yes. LL Cool J. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's another good one. That's another classic. Yeah. The genre we're talking about. Yeah, and the funny thing about me being in SWAT is right before that, the first movie that I ever got was Leprechaun Back to the Hood. Oh, fuck! Dude, are you kidding?

Oh, that's another one. He was blowing his mind every time. You know what's funny? I was in middle school, and I remember. Truly, every movie you're describing, I have definitely watched it. I was so stoned that there's no way I would have known which actor was who. You know what I mean? Right. Like Leprechaun, back to another class. Oh, man, you've got... You're holding down a very specific genre that's near and dear to my heart, which is just like an action movie that...

Leprechaun and Back to the Hood absolutely knew what it was doing. Like, that's what's beautiful about it. It was just like, we know what you're here for. Yeah, we know what we're here for. We're like, this is going to be awesome. They're like, okay, you watch the first Leprechaun and the black people in the audience were funnier, were adding to it by yelling at the screen. Right, right, right. Let's just take that experience and just put it directly into the movie and it's

A beautiful, a beautiful formula, dude. So, respect. Wow, what a fucking resume. But just to show you, like, you know, like, the difference of it is, like, here's this movie that we have no trailers. We are just standing outside. Yeah, yeah.

You gotta go in the bathroom, change dark clothes. And then in some big ass warehouse, it's cold as shit. We all in the same place. And then, you know, immediately, like 10 days after we shoot that, then I go to like the biggest thing that you can possibly have. And I remember like, you know, they were driving us to the 6th Street Bridge in the van.

And it was like Samuel Jackson in the front seat. That's fucking wild. Yeah. LL Cool J, Michelle Rodriguez, Jeremy Renner. Insane, dude. And I'm sitting in the back seat like. Yeah, what the fuck's going on? Yeah, that's insane. Like, what if this car like just goes off the road or like. You're not making it at all. I'm not.

I'm not making the press release. Not at all. The bus driver might make it first because it's like they don't disrespect the working man. You know what I mean? Like they'll say the famous people and then also the crew. Like you were right in the sweet spot where you technically were talent, but come on, man. You're not making that. Nobody even knows I'm dying. Yeah.

No chance, dude. They're like, LL Cool J, and then LL Cool J again died? We couldn't tell. He sort of looked like him. I feel like, what's that lady who died on the same day as Michael Jackson? Oh, that's tough. I don't even know her name. I don't know what.

Look that up, Eldridge. Wow, that's a tough one. She's famous in a moment, and we don't even talk about her. I would love to figure this out. Because she died on the same day as Michael Jackson. Farrah Fawcett. Wow. She's a huge star. I had no idea, dude.

She's like, why can't I get my own death day? Just a day before, she would have had the whole day. You don't want to do day after. Michael blocks out every celebrity death for a while. Holy shit. Damn. Yeah, that's true. That's tough. That would have been you, bro. That would have been you. Damn. I mean, even... I don't even know at that point in his career if Renner even gets...

Oh, no, not yet. No, he hadn't really popped yet. He had Dahmer. I think that was it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It would have been LL and Samuel L. Jackson for sure. And Michelle Rodriguez because of Fast and the Furious at the time for sure. But that's awesome, dude. That's insane. So that dichotomy was very interesting for me to go from that to that.

Yeah, that's, it was literally 10 days later, Leprechaun, who directed SWAT? Was it? Clark Johnson. Okay, cool. Yeah, I did The Shield with him. Oh, that's awesome. And, and,

Yeah, because I auditioned for the LL part and they were like, no, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We want to get this famous rapper. Of course. Of course, yeah. So, yeah, so I've done a couple action things, but that for sure was like. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that was a step up. Cool, yeah. No, it was awesome. And, you know, people get hurt in these actions.

action feeling like it seemed like oh I get that everything is safe dude I did I did a fucking so I the only movie I've ever I did like a little indie comedy this this summer and you know I had never acted I did I did like one day on a rom-com you know in a rom-com where the main characters run into a weird guy that fucks with them oh yeah

I'm literally like the main characters. They ran into a weird guy on a bus and that was my role. So I just come in for, literally they just were like, let's get a comedian to roast these hot people for whatever. And that was fun. But I wrote a movie, you know, I just like kind of want to get into it. I want to like, and, you know, my philosophy has always been just kind of make shit happen for yourself. Like I'm a five, seven,

fat balding man Hollywood's not gonna be like let's get him you know who we need to be a star of a movie is a diner owner but that's what I mean you gotta make it happen yeah exactly but even that they prefer if you have a full head of hair you know what I mean and thank you coming from another bald man wearing a wig right now I appreciate it

You're the first guest to ever compliment my hair and it's fully because you're also bald.

I feel your pain, bro. I feel your pain. Nah, but come on. Black dude, bald. It's like ever since Jordan, it's like a cheat code. Every black guy looks so much better with a bald head. Whereas a white guy, you got to be Statham for it to pull it off. You got to be Statham. Otherwise, you just look like a mall. Not even Bruce Willis? You got to be Statham. Bruce Willis in his prime, for sure. But...

But yeah, dude, anyway, the point I was... What I was trying to say is... So we're doing the... I wrote a little indie movie with some friends and we made... You want to talk about changing in the fucking... No trailers, changing in the bat. Like what you're describing, Left Behind, Back to the Hood probably...

was like 10 times the budget. Like we made it for so little money. I literally was napping under trees. Like I had no, and I'm the star, in theory, I wrote it, executive produced it. I'm the first, I'm the, and I was just like napping under a tree between takes. Like that's, it was great. I love, you know, it was great. I'm happy to do it. But we had a scene where we just had to run

And I was like, you don't think about how hard a movie is. Like, your hour, your sleep, you work 14 hours a day. You're sleeping, like, I'm sleeping in some horrible Airbnb with the director and the co-star. Because that's, again, the, you know, that's the budget we're working with. And I was, I'd come off a tour. I filmed my stand-up special. And I went right to this movie. So I'm totally, I like, I was like, I pulled, like,

two muscles in my fucking like back from just two takes of sprinting. No action, no rolling around and actually we had to, I had to tackle a guy in it and you don't think about the simplest shit and this is for a indie comedy and I was like, oh my God, like,

If this had any... My finger is... Dude, I was literally icing my shit and dude, it was... I had a sprinting scene once. Well, I did it once and I was like, that's easy and I woke up the next day and my whole body hurt. Ha ha ha ha!

And everyone on set's like, be careful. And I'm like, chill out, you fucking pussies. I can run. And it was so, and then I had to do the second one and I was like, that was the only diva shit I ever did in my life. I was like, I cannot run. I'm not sprinting again, bro. And you know what they did?

We got a real stand-in. No, no. No, it was a PA. It was a butch lesbian PA who didn't even have the same body type. She was great. She was black. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was Hispanic, I think. She was great, though. She was awesome. But, yeah, we didn't even have PAs that even matched our stand-ins that matched. But literally what we did was speed up the tape.

So they looked like I was running fast. They were like, damn, this fucking sprinting sucks, dude. Like it was just me in a field. So it didn't look that bad. It just looked like, damn, this motherfucker's fast. But so I can imagine how much that an actual action movie could write you up. You have to be in good shape. You have to. And like I said, it's still like little things that.

Because we had to do it so many times. So there was a couple, like, things on the Meg. Like, you know, at the end when I...

They call it my bad boy. Man, they hooked me up, bro. Yeah, they did. They called it my bad boy moment where I get to run and then jump sideways in slow motion. And I get to fucking wow, wow, you know, and smoke the damn dinosaur. Which is so fucking funny, by the way. Shooting a dinosaur in the head with a gun and not like a rifle. Right, like a big ass gun.

No, but so the landing of that. So I did that shot, I don't know, maybe 22 times. Damn, dude. Which seems to be very obnoxious to have to do something 22. That's crazy, yeah. So imagine doing the full dive.

And land in on your damn ribs. Fucking your ribs up, yeah. Like 22 times. No, that sucks. Yeah, that's insane. Yeah. So I almost drowned. And it's so funny because when I watch the movie and I get to that part and I see where they cut.

Yeah. Because they're like, oh, well, he almost died here. Right, right, right, right, right, right. It intimates what happened here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, goddammit, I did all that? For two seconds. That's another really annoying thing where it's like, yeah, you worked all day and it's in the movie for one second. Or an editor gets in there like, this sucks. And they don't even put it in. You're like, what the fuck, man? That happened to me. So I did this TV show called

called Legit. I'm trying to think. What was the name? Jim Jeffries. Oh, yeah. He's fucking hilarious. It was his show. That's awesome. And we did this and I was a...

home invader on there and they had this big huge bone with this huge base right and the girl supposed to take it and then crack me over the head with this like one of the can't eat glass well this thing was so that when she hit me it was like but it wasn't like light it was like and it gave me a concussion and almost knocked me out right and they did it twice

They didn't, like, they already had to stop the set because, like, I'm, like, out. You know, they did it again. So they have a fucking medic tendie and they're like, all right, you ready to go, Paige? They stopped the whole set, bro, like, while I sit there and recover from this huge injury. And the motherfuckers never used it. It's not in the damn thing. Like, I still got a big-ass buck on my seat right now and they never use it. They're like, you're gonna sue us. Yeah, that's fucking crazy. Have you ever been, like...

Cut out of anything awesome Like have you ever been In like a thing Where you're like Fuck dude How could you take me Out of this Yeah I was pissed off I was in this movie Called The Other Woman With um Was it uh Cameron Diaz Was she in that The motherfucker from Um Game of Thrones Okay Uh

Jamie Lannister. Oh, yeah, here we go. The other woman. Yeah, Nicki Minaj was in that. Yeah, Kate Upton, Leslie Mann. So, I don't know how to pronounce Niccolo's, Costar's name. Oh, yeah, Costar Waldo. Yeah, so he was in Game of Thrones. Jamie Lannister. Jamie Lannister. He's in Shot Caller 2. Right. Don Johnson is. Yeah, it's a big movie. So, I was the end credit scene, right? They brought me in to be the end credit scene because he goes to jail at the end of the thing. And...

I'm his cellmate and I rape him. They're like some good old fashioned comedy. When did this movie come out? 2014. They're doing a little prison rape stinger at the end. It was so funny, man. And then I saw Joe Apatow at the premiere. He was like,

like on the red carpet he's like I just want to let you know you're fantastic in the movie but the test audiences they really didn't like you raping Jamie Lannister and I'm like what are you talking about I think he's lying I'm like I hope this was a joke I'm sitting there waiting the whole time like nothing no one tells you you go to the premiere and you're thinking it's at the end so you're the whole time you're like here we go I'm popping this shit out of Jamie Lannister baby hell yeah you know what time it is

And then I didn't know what time it was. That's so funny. That's so funny. No heads up is crazy. Exactly. Did he direct it? Because his wife's in it. I don't know. Go up, Eldis. You know, she's so funny. She's actually one of the most funny. Oh, Cassavetes. Oh, Nick Cassavetes. Yeah, that guy's awesome. He's done some fucking bangers. And he's obviously, you know, his dad is like the fucking...

The guy who started basically Indie film Or not started but he's a big John Cassavetes but Nick Cassavetes did a lot of fucking cool shit But anyway John Q He's done a ton of huge movies So that sucked Yeah I'm like man damn it That sucks dude

Yeah, I mean, because that seems like a thing that happens to actors a lot where it's like you get something or you get close to something. Like, I remember I was toothless. And again, I'm not trying to be like, as an actor myself, I didn't have a tooth for two years. And I got to the end. And I wasn't popping at all at the time. And my podcast was doing well, but I...

And I never got any commercial stuff. I always figured like, oh, I'm toothless. Yeah, like look at me right there. I didn't have a tooth. With the full body. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now that was a look. Yeah, absolutely. Well, yeah. So looking like that, I got to the final round of auditions for a...

a commercial where I had to be a fucking carnival ride operator. And I'm like, well, I'm fucking toothless. I'm going to get this. Who's fucking, who's going to beat me at being, and then, and I lost, and it was a lot of money because it's like, you know, you know how commercials pay. It's like, you don't, you don't have to be famous at all and they'll give you like a hundred grand to just like pull over. And I lost that audition. And I was like, how the fuck did I lose this audition to like a handsome gay guy? He's not, he doesn't look like a carnival ride operator. Yeah.

I remember getting to the end. But anyway, so it was that pissed me off. So I'm sure there's like, you know, have you ever been like close to getting anything awesome? Wait, hold on. Speaking of losing that job, how did you lose that tooth? Like, how are you like this? Like, what the fuck is this? You,

can't just skip by this. What is this? Well, a lot of my philosophy is like, how fucked up looking can I be and still succeed in life? Because I think that's a big... How would I look like a Jack Glantner? Yeah, totally. It's a big badge of honor. And I had like a hot girlfriend when I looked like that. Wow. My life was honestly the toothless years of my life were the best years of my life. I miss it. A big issue I have is that I wish I had

my bald long hair with no tooth that would be a power look that's fucked up that I have I never paired these two that would have been crazy but I literally I mean I used to do a bit about it but I I literally the final straw was I cracked it on a chicken wing like I was eating wings and the tooth fucking cracked yeah and I finished the wings by the way I ate

I ate them with like the back of my teeth. - Oh you going down, you see what you did? I'm really about to fuck you up now. - And dude, I literally was like, I peeled the wings off and like placed them in my back teeth.

I'm in a comedy club. I was at the Comedy Cellar. They do have the best wings. I will say that. Weirdly, the Comedy Cellar has incredible wings. That sounds like a terrible commercial for them. Dude, I'm... Yeah, I know. That's how crispy they are. You don't even have to tell them to double fry them.

But... Wait, so you... Where was the tooth? Did you keep it? Did you... So what happened was... Ultimately what happened is I had something called tooth resorption, which is when, like, your tooth is so weak. Or, like, it's like you have some trauma to the tooth, and, like, it just slowly, for whatever reason, nutrients are coming out of it. So it's fucked up, and it's just your body is absorbing the tooth from the inside. So you don't know that you have this little fucked up tooth, and...

And it just completely, I would feel it like if you put any pressure on it. But again, I'm broke at the time. I'm not going to the fucking dentist. And then I went to some like, oh man, my mom used to work at a dental lab. And so they had a hookup with a dentist who would fix it up. But I got a, I'm not kidding, a $50 root canal. A $50 root canal? You'll be shocked to hear it didn't fix it. Yeah.

And it was so weird, dude. This guy just was like, he was a nice guy, but just, you don't want to have a dentist in the same parking lot as a Jiffy Lube. That's a good rule of thumb. And he just fucked it up. I mean, he didn't fuck it up. I don't know what he did. And then I just cracked it on this fucking wing and it didn't come out. It was just cracked.

And it hurts so bad. And for three days, because I had had, you know, when you're young and poor, you're just like any health problem, you're like, well, we'll give this three weeks to fix itself. You know what I mean? I literally was like just a good night's rest and my tooth will be back to normal.

And so I eventually just had to go to the dentist because it hurt so fucking bad. And they were like... And I didn't know either that... Like, I thought, all right, you lose a tooth, they fucking put another one in. It's like a fucking year-long process. A year long? You got to get a bone graft. You got to... That takes like six months. Then you have to... The whole thing, if you do it as soon as possible...

They can kind of figure it out in like six months, whatever. But I also didn't know what I was doing. And I was going to just a friend's uncle. Again, I have no money at the time. And it took me so long. Because I thought... Because I didn't... I wasn't even listening. Because the guy was like, the bone graft is going to take six months to heal. So I heard like, oh...

your bone grows back in six months. So he pulls the tooth and I'm like, well, six months, I got to let this, whatever. And then I go to the dentist. I'm like, all right, it's been six months. He's like, wait, you never got the bone graft. And I was like, what do you mean? So then I had to get the bone graft and then wait another six months. But at that point, I kind of liked being toothless. He's like, look at my girlfriend. She hated it.

That I figured out. She would like, whenever we, oh man, did she hate it? If y'all argue, she just, ugh. I could tell. And you know what? She was 100% right. Like it was fucked up to introduce people to your fat, toothless boyfriend. She's already much hotter than me.

No one understands why we're dating to begin with, you know? Not again, you're funny. Yeah, but it's like if that doesn't come across immediately, if I'm like, if she's at work and she's like, it used to be to her work friends or like, like what I remember when I met her family, she was just like, she really was like, because I met people she worked with and I didn't, I didn't bring the tooth because I had a fake tooth. Oh. I had like a little flipper.

but I just took it out. You know, I just didn't like wearing it. It sucked. And she, yeah, she was like, she was literally like, cause I just didn't bring the fake tooth when I met some of her work friends. And she was like, why didn't you bring your tooth? And I was like, I don't know who gives a fuck. This is who I am. And then she just was like, I could, I did feel bad. It was like, Oh, I literally didn't even, that's how people talk about accepting yourself. That's how much I had accepted myself. I didn't even consider bringing my fake tooth.

to like meeting people that were important to my girlfriend like I didn't even consider it it didn't even dawn on me that I should do that but when I met her family I put the fake tooth in obviously yeah yeah yeah and then you just rocked with whatever is going on I was fully bald I was fully bald back then that was it was that era oh okay but anyway anyway yeah

But have you ever, did you ever get close to anything fucking, you know, anything awesome that you were like, fuck. Like, we talked about you getting cut out, but any big roles you almost got or shit that, like, you know. Were you ever, like, a finalist for something? Man, I feel like that happens so often. Yeah. You know, I mean, the worst is when you get drugged along. I got drugged along for...

I think three months on 8 Mile. Oh, no. That's fucking brutal. You're a Detroit rapper. I'm a Detroit rapper who grew up in what they're talking about, the hip-hop style. And they give it to Mekhi Pfeiffer? And they give it to Mekhi Pfeiffer. And I'm like, what is up, bitch? They drag my ass along. Oh, you're in the mix. You're in the mix. Oh, no, dude. I'm sitting there like, hey, I'm telling everybody I'm being 8 Mile. 100%.

I have to be an 8-mile and then it's him. Yeah, that's brutal, dude. So, yeah, that sucked. Yeah, yeah.

Wow, that's gotta be, that's like, yeah. They're making a movie about growing up a fat Greek guy in Baltimore and I don't get that? I would fucking kill myself, dude. That's insane. It's the drag along that pisses you off so much. Of course, of course. You know, like, I guess just recently I just went through that, like, this year with, like, Kevin Hart has this new show that he's doing called

Fight Night that's happening in Atlanta right now and Drug Alone where like you know the director is even saying like oh you're the choice you're the pick you know and then even to ask

more insult to that he's like and we still have to confirm with the producers but even if this doesn't work there's another role that we have that you won't even have to audition for and then none of them they gave those to Makai Pfeiffer too yeah exactly he gave it to me so I'm wearing a wig too now so I'm only wearing this so I mean his wig was wild in that movie

It was like, we all know Makai Pfeiffer. We know he's not like this. It was like, come on, man. Give him something a little more subtle than that. Yeah, that one, the one where he's next to Eminem, I mean, it looks ridiculous. That looks like an SNL wig.

But that's gotta be brutal too, because you rap and you grew up in Detroit. And so it was like... And that story, so when it, where he's battling, you know, that was kind of like indicative of this place called the hip hop shop where we used to go. And that's where, you know, Proof would run that. He would be the host. And Proof is the guy, Makai Pfeiffer. Yeah, he's playing. And...

uh yeah so I would be there that's where I first saw Eminem yeah yeah yeah it's there and it just it just sucks man yeah yeah yeah it sucks so much you know that that didn't happen but you know were you battling back then when you were like coming up is that when did you start rapping in Detroit because you grew up in Detroit yeah right and so are you is that what you're like just battling were you a battle rapper what was how did you get started well I

Actually, you know, I've been rapping since elementary school. Okay. So, like, I'm talking about, like, full on, like, writing in my neighborhood. Like, I'm, like, the best rapper, but I'm also the youngest. Yeah, yeah. And, like, adults. Like...

I say adults, but they're probably like 18, 19 years old. Right, right, right. Come to my house just to like bring their friends for me to do my raps because I'm like a little kid, but I'm confident. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's always like when a little kid is good at something, it's always like, this is fucking crazy. There's like a novelty factor to it. Right, because it's like, why are you able to do this? Totally. And why do you have so much confidence?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then especially like because, you know, I've been like a word person like my whole life, you know. And so I was I was always like that, even when I was like a precocious little kid. So elementary school, middle school, high school, you know, so I was constantly doing that. But yeah, high school is when I really like started like battling. Cool. You know, and.

And that's where that side of me came from. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome. Was that area. There really was a crazy... Because when we were in college, me and Nell, we grew up together. But there really was a... I feel like battle rapping now has gotten...

it has gotten like very punchline and very staccato where it's like, there's very little flowing. I feel like, you know what I mean? It's always like, it's pretty much punchline. It's, it's almost a roast battle with just a little rhythm now. Like all that stuff used to be, you know, like smack was awesome. And like, uh, the Toronto one, the king of the, what was it? Yeah. King of the dot. Like that,

There was an era, I feel like, right when we were in college where it was right before the transition. I mean, 8 Mile did a lot for it. And then there was... What was on BET? Gin was... What was that? Remember that? Freestyle Fridays. Freestyle Fridays. And I feel like even MTV had that one...

competition that it was live that was awesome oh making a band no no making the band is awesome although I auditioned for making a band you might have dodged a bullet on that one or I did probably probably for the best that you got that you didn't get that one no I didn't I didn't

But yeah, making the band was a great, you know, was hilarious. But I just do feel like there was, honestly, 8 Mile had a ton to do with it because there was a huge battle. There was a huge rap and culture, I feel like, right around the time that that movie came out. But yeah, now it does feel like it's gotten a little too, like,

just, you know, there's not a lot of where I imagine back then it was, you know, people cared about flowing. There wasn't also, I feel like people now have sort of seen everything.

Where it's like not enough just be a good rapper for like in the battling culture. I don't know. I feel like it's falling off a little bit. But it's cool that... I would love a battle rapper surgence. Because we kind of grew up on that shit. Well, we tried to have that until J. Cole decided to cop a plea. Well, we'll see. We'll see. I mean, we'll see what happens with... I have a feeling...

Kendrick and Drake That would just be awesome Oh that would That would be awesome If they actually And Drake Seems like You know He with the shits Especially cause It feels like

The Avengers is going after Thanos right now. Yeah, which is cool. I mean, which is kind of a... I mean, it is a compliment to some degree, but I just do think Kendrick really is the one guy who has the argument for being his equal in some capacity where, you know, Drake is huge. And, I mean, obviously, the pusher T thing just...

is the big dent in his... He's like a boxer that's like 90 and 1. He's like Drake. That was a tough one because there's no way to look at that and say... He only... Honestly, me personally, I only feel like he lost that because of the bombshell that was dropped. The kid thing. But that is... That is why...

Japan only surrendered because of the two atomic bombs. You know what I mean? They still dropped a nuke on him. It was awesome. But also, I think...

Pusha T was just like the guy to do it where it's like some people would have fucked that up but he had enough of like you know he just had enough credibility and his style was perfect it was awesome but anyway I don't know it was just cool because I do love I will say my favorite thing about 8 Mile it was tough to be a kid named Clarence when 8 Mile came out

We had a kid, there was a kid named Clarence at my, I grew up in Baltimore, and Clarence was a little, he was little as fuck. He was like 5'2". So he's, I'm sorry, Clarence, if you're fucking listening. Maybe he's 5'5", but he was a little guy, just not athletic at all. And it was like, he was a cool dude. I fucked with him, but it was like, man, when you're a tiny, like tiny kid in fucking high school, and your name's Clarence, and that shit drops. Yeah, that's...

There's no coming back from that. Damn. There was no coming back from that from Clarence. Cool dude. I don't want to say his last name, but... Damn, Clarence. Yeah, poor Clarence, man. What are you going to do? But that's... Yeah, dude, that's interesting. Sorry you missed out on that. That would have been fucking... That could have been you in that over-the-top dread wig. That could have been me. Could have been records. You know...

Also, here's another one that pissed me off. Get rich or die trying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. I was a big 50 guy in middle school when he was coming up. I'm sorry. It's tough to do. I hate to do that to people because it's tough to do that to people because I look like shit. I'm a grown ass man. What did you do?

I got a grown-ass daughter. Yeah, I know, man. Sorry. You're middle school. I was in middle school, and there was a big Ja Rule versus 50 Cent thing going on in seventh grade. I hate to make you feel even worse, but I do remember being... But I was, to my credit, a staunchly 50 guy back in the day. Yeah. So what happened was before they did the movie, they wanted to get...

50 up to speed acting wise. And so they went and they like handpicked, I think it was four of us actors to meet with the director. They took us to this amazing hotel in Hollywood. It was me, Taraji P. Henson, Omar Benson, who is actually in Hollywood.

Is Omar in this, in 8 Mile, and in Get Rich or Die Trying? I feel like he is. Omar Benson. He's been in a ton of stuff. Yeah, so he was in both. He's in this and in Get Rich or Die Trying. And then there was also another actor from New York that they brought. So they brought us all in to work with him and do scenes with him. And we did.

and we did it. We didn't get paid or anything. Like, we did it on a pretenses that we thinking that we're gonna be part of the project. And, um, only Omar was, was, uh,

That's so funny. That must have been the, I mean, I can't imagine, I can't imagine trying to like get through a fresh, like trying to act with 50 Cent at that time. I know, right? That must have been your greatest challenge because you're literally Shakespeare, aren't you a Shakespearean troublemaker?

trained actor to be like, all right, 50, let's spar. Let's go back and forth. Exactly. I can't imagine. 50's great. He's hilarious, but I wouldn't say he's our finest actor. He is hilarious. You know, actually, now I think about it, he blocked me over this. He's petty. I broke this up before. He's petty online. He was doing the...

He was going through the Get the Strap campaign where he's going by telling people that they owe him money. Oh, wow, really? I don't remember that, actually. This was probably like maybe like four years ago. Okay. When he was just like, that was his little shit that he was, so many people owe him money or whatever. So I did the same thing back to him. I'm saying, you owe me money because your ass. Yeah. And his son...

comment it on one of my things and because his son commented on it and he's like beefed out with his son I guess oh he is he's beefing with his own son like they met each other so he blocked my ass wow dude he not nothing not even a case of vitamin water he can't send you block me please that's fucking wild dude dude that's that's crazy I mean

Dude, we could talk forever. I have so many questions. If you're ever back, please come to the show again. But we got half of the show here that we do is advice. So, you know, we'd love to get your perspective to some of our listeners here. And anything, by the way, anything you want to plug? Anything people should check out in particular? Oh, I got straight bars five.

Out right now My mixtape that is Available Everywhere There's There's five It's a series of Of five mixtapes Straight bars It's No No hooks No gimmicks Just like straight Awesome dude Crazy

Bars is coming at you Nice And then I also Have my album Out A Book of Pages All this stuff is Like on the streaming platform So Yeah check it out Definitely check that out Follow Page on You know We'll have all this stuff linked Eldest shit dude Back at Eldest Eldest you gotta dust off Fruity Loops dude Make a couple Make a couple beats

Because we all, that's another thing. We were fucking, you know, we just grew up in the era. And, you know, we're both from Baltimore. We were big rap fans, too. And Eldest definitely had his producer era. You got a couple placements, dude. Oh, yeah. We'll get your beat mail after this show. I'll send you some shit. You'll be like, damn, this guy's got to stop fucking reaching out. Yeah. Before Eldest, before we started working together, Eldest, that was like,

Eldest's way to try and get out of his shitty media job was he was just DMing, he was just DMing like SoundCloud teenagers. Eldest is just like emailing like, you know, these kids on pills. Like, hey guys, check out my fucking room. Check out my beats. I'm DMing fucking SoundCloud rappers. I'm DMing 16 year olds on cough syrup.

I'm paying like a 14 year old like 20 bucks to give me cracks to like FL Studio and different VSTs and shit. What a hilarious era, dude. Damn, there is something. I do feel like there is a compulsion amongst every white kid that grew up in like a predominantly black city where you're like,

Maybe I could be a rapper. Right. Like, everyone has that. You have to stop yourself. And production is the one, like, it's the non-embarrassing way to go about it. It's like, yeah, this is fine. There's plenty of, like, I do feel like that's an archetype of producer is, like, there's, like, obviously, like, Alchemist is just a cool dude who happens to be white. But then there's, like, a ton of producers who are just dork white guys that are just sick. You see a picture of them, you're like, what? Yeah.

this is who this guy is. And you could have been that a different in a different life. That could have been you hit that YouTube harder. You should hit YouTube harder. Hey, we'll do it, dude. When we give in, when we finally start our vanity rap project, we'll hire you as a ghostwriter. You know? Yeah. I love, I would love that dude. Just like a five track mixtape.

where it's just like, you know, bragging about, oh, that would be awesome. That's when you get famous. Like when a famous person, like when they...

Retroactively get into music. Like, you've been rapping forever, but, like, Bruce Willis is a great example where it's like, that motherfucker's going on tour with his band or, like, that kind of... Back in the day, like, that'll be our vanity project. We fucking do a mixtape that you produce and I... Even though I can't rap, it would just be... I'm just copying all of Action Bronzer's. Everybody can rap now. Like... Yeah. Yeah, you...

I feel like with your aesthetic that... Totally. It would be all aesthetic. It would be awesome. Yeah, yeah. I would look... That's the thing, though. I would just be stealing Action Bronson's whole shit. That's really what it is. When Action came out, I was like, oh, that guy rocks. That's everything. That's everything I want to be. I just looked at him. I was like, damn, that guy. He was fatter than me at the time. Now he's awesome. Now he's jacked. I literally am just...

following his whole life plan, to be honest. I'm trying to get jacked. He's out here, right? Yeah, I think he's back and forth. I think that, you know, a lot of people kind of bounce around. But yeah, he's from here. He's actually from Queens. We'd love to get him on the pod. I got to fucking hit him up because he's awesome. But anyway. Whoa, I'm back. And I want to tell you about game time even more than I did at the beginning of the episode.

The GameTime ticketing app is my favorite ticketing app out there, folks. Alright? Even if they weren't giving me money to tell you that, it would be the truth. Here's why. Last-minute flash deals. I respect that, and I respect the fact that it's all in pricing. I hate getting my ass bungled.

I hate when my ass gets, when my tushy gets punked by fees, hidden fees. I hate that shit so much. No fees here, all in price, and you know exactly what you're getting from the jump. And, like I said, the flash deals, I love that shit. Because I'm in Baltimore this summer, okay? Baseball's the kind of thing, they play 100 fucking, 200 fucking games.

You know, I'm not going to make a, I can't plan my life around their games, but Camden Yards is a beautiful ballpark. I'm spending my summer walking around, checking shit out. And if I happen to be in the area, I check game times, flash deals. Holy shit. $7 tickets for the O's last minute. Buy them right there. I do. I get them immediately. That's what I love about it.

They know that we kind of got them by the balls if we wait a little. I'm a deal hunter. I'm a bargain hunter. I like playing Russian roulette with the event or the venue, whatever, and being like, look,

I only kind of want to go to this fucking thing. I'm only going if it's a deal. And that's what it is. GameTime is the ticketing app for deal hunters. And look, if you just want to see something, you're set on it. They're there for you, too. I'm strolling on it right now. They got incredible stuff coming to Baltimore this summer. I just realized Hans Zimmer's going to be here. I might see the motherfucker playing his beautiful scores at the—where's he playing? The CFG Bank Arena.

I'm scrolling around here, like I said, O's are coming through. I just saw that we got a monster truck rally. That I might actually buy ahead of time because I want the best seats. Whether you want a deal, you want the best seats, you want just to know exactly what you're gonna pay for immediately,

GameTime's the app for you. Take the guesswork out of buying concert tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code STAVY for $20 off your first purchase. $20 on me. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code STAVY, S-T-A-V-V-Y, for $20 off. Download GameTime today. Last-minute tickets, lowest prices, guaranteed. Hey, the RU Garbage Boys are coming to Baltimore.

Buy their tickets off Game Time, and maybe I'll pop on the stage too. Enough of that. Check out the mixtapes. We'll have it all linked. Check out the album. And let's do a little, let's do some questions here, LD. Hey, Savvy. Hey, Eldest. Nope. I have kind of a big question. It never plays. Hey, Savvy. Hey, Eldest.

I have kind of a weird question today. So I started dating again recently and I met someone really organically at a show. He's awesome. We have a lot in common and

All of the things that we have in common are things he's brought up first because I've been really careful recently. I don't really trust people. So super into spirituality, super into art. He's really into music. So we hit it off really well. We've become great friends over the past couple of months and we've taken it to the next level recently. Nice. We were texting the other day and we were just talking about art and I asked him, what kind of mediums you work with? And he said he,

likes to use charcoal and pencils. I'm like, that's great. That's awesome. And he shared some of his art without me asking, which I thought was cool. I don't know. I got a weird feeling about it because he said, I'm not very good with pencil. Sends me this immaculate, immaculate drawing. And I don't know. I just had a weird feeling. So I reverse image searched it on Google and it

No! Oh, no. Oh, no.

I haven't said anything to him yet. I just kind of played along with it because he didn't know that I did that. But what would you do? What should I do? I'm extremely weirded out now. Yeah, that's fucking weird. I don't know. I should have my stuff. It's not that good. I just like to make shit because I like to make shit. Sure. Yeah. What do you guys think? Is it weird? Should I just ghost him?

I think I'm going to say something, but I don't want to make it too uncomfortable and embarrass him. I mean. Thanks, guys. That's fucking crazy. Yo, that's insane. Also, dude, if you're going to do that.

you gotta figure out people can reverse image shit. No, he didn't think she would be a fucking psychopath and go and reverse engineer the goddamn image. I don't know. He's like, bitch, just take the goddamn thing and say that's cool. And you're going about your life. You don't gotta go and be a sleuth about it. What the fuck is wrong with you? You're supposed to be like, oh, this is awesome and then go about our life. Oh, cool.

But this was going to come up at some point though. Like, imagine you pretend you're awesome at drawing and then she's like, hey, come over. Let's, let's fucking hang out. She talks about how she's into art. She showed him her, like, this is, this is an insane thing to do. This is crazy because it's so, you can find out about this so easily and it would get me, if a woman did this to me, I'd be like, what the fuck else has she been lying about? She didn't actually come. I don't give a fuck. She didn't come. Well,

Well, that's, yeah, that's, you know, whatever. That's going to happen. That's standard. You know, that's standard sometimes. I prefer honesty, but if you want to fake it, hey, that's on you, sister. But this is insane. This is like, because, and look, there is a scenario that you're saying too, right? Where it's like, this guy's insecure. He wants her to think he's cool. And so he's trying to lie about...

you know, he's just like lying about...

But imagine if... But it's all based on this pretense that he does do this stuff. So I would worry that... What else has he been lying about? He's clearly... There's this disease of just pretending to be someone to impress the person you're dating. That's something that I think a lot of people do that's based on insecurity. It's something that even in my life... I recently went on a couple dates with somebody and I was just like...

wait, she's nice, but we're not really, I don't really see this

going anywhere. It was literally the first time in my life where I was like, huh, I don't have to pretend to be someone else to get pussy. And I was like, I'm just not gonna try, I'm just not gonna pursue this. And it felt great to be like, oh, cool, I don't have to like, you know, I don't have that disease of like being a high school, it goes back to being like an insecure high school boy who just wants women's attention. So you'll do anything, you'll pretend to be anyone. But if you grow up, you have to just be like, look, I'm who I am and then I'll attract girls

who I should be attracted, right? And so for this guy to be like, it's one thing to, he's not even just lying about his interests. He's like stealing someone else's work to pretend, to do this lie that he'll easily be caught in. So I would be worried if I was her that it's like, you know, I don't know, man. This is fucking weird. I would honestly, this would creep me out. If I was him, I would be

I feel like his question might be next. He might be the next caller and like, you know, I was with this chick and she hit a whole goddamn background check on me. And sent her a picture and said it was me. And she went and did the whole thing. But look, I'm with you that it is. But this is one of those things where it's like he's clearly done enough in his behavior. This is like when cops need certain probable cause to get a warrant. He did enough. He

He did enough weird shit to her that she's like, okay, we'll run a background. We'll do the... I got a warrant to Google image search this. Like, he did enough weird shit. What does the next level mean? She said they went to the next level. They probably fucked, if I had to guess. Oh, okay. She's just a... You know, she's maybe a quaint...

I mean, whatever. Maybe they just, you know, there was some jerking each other off. Maybe there was some sucking. Maybe there wasn't... I'm guessing they just hooked up is what she's saying. We, you know, we touched each other. Yeah, I don't think it was like going to dinner. That's the next level. And so I feel for this woman because she clearly...

Approach this in a she's very guarded. It seems like you know she wanted to get to know this guy first and And she feels like she did put him through like okay I want to be in a relationship with somebody I can trust like she didn't just like meet someone vibe hook up figure it out later She went about this a very intentional way, and she still caught a psycho. It seems like like a potential psycho Yeah, maybe

He was trying to get some pussy. This is the best way. Well, clearly he was trying to get some pussy. He's clearly quaint. So I have to take my time with her and show I have some interest that she might like. But it's also like, then just do a shitty drawing. That's the thing.

If he had made a shitty drawing, then it's kind of sweet where he's like, oh, I'm trying to get into the shit she likes. But he stole one. And then he was like, this is the funniest part. He's like, oh, it's not very good. But he picked an awesome one. So he's doing fake humility when he's stealing art. To me, this is the kind of thing where... Well, it worked. Yeah, I mean, he did get the fuck. So he...

Yeah, this is, yeah. Yeah, I was caught stealing another man's art and ghosted, but I still beat. So, there's still, so, no,

Now look, if I'm her, I think I would be weirded out. And look, she's saying also something that's like, I don't want to make it uncomfortable. You're not the one making it uncomfortable. She made it uncomfortable doing something weird, right? So I think this is important for our caller. Even though this is a weird thing that happened to you, this is a potential moment of growth where, because I've been that person before too, where it's like,

avoiding conflict, not wanting to make things uncomfortable, sometimes that leads to you getting trampled by other people, right? The people that are, that like confrontation, they can kind of get whatever the fuck they want. For our caller here, I would say, you deserve to know what the fuck this guy was thinking. So she should ask him? Absolutely. I think she should be like, hey, like, Hey, so I was just wondering, you know,

This picture that you sent is really nice. It just reminds me of something else that I've seen on the internet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. I mean, that is true. You do have to go about it in a specific way. I guess you're right in that he could then be like... Give him a chance to come clean a little or something. You don't want to play good cop, bad cop. It's like, so, uh...

What did you do to do... Can you show me a little version of that? Like, I wouldn't do these men's psychological tricks. You should be like, look, you can even apologize. Like, I don't know why I even did this, but I threw it in reverse Google search and I saw... I just saw that you did it. Like, like...

I don't know. I do feel like, I mean, I guess that's true. I think this is grounds for ghosting, definitely. I think so, too. Or just doing, like, you know, very abrupt, like, fade away, just short text back. If she does that, then he wins. He got the beat and then beat it. I don't think he wins. He doesn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think he wins because he's the kind of weirdo that would do this. Yeah. Like, this guy wants to be with this girl maybe too much.

But that's the thing. I guess what I'm saying is for two reasons, right? She owes it to herself a little bit, I think, to push through something uncomfortable and confront someone about doing something weird. But also, it's like, I do think there is a possibility that this guy just likes her so much that he doesn't want, like, that he wants to present himself as someone who's good at the shit that she likes. Now...

If I had to pick, I would say, like, this is probably not somebody you're going to end up with, somebody you're going to date long term. It is fucking weird. The only problem here is the, why did you reverse Google image search it? That is very interesting to me. What made you say...

But I get it. She's just off vibes, dude. She literally said, I just had a weird feeling. And my only thing about her confronting him about it is that that's a little bit of a hurdle for her to get through of like, Hey, look, I just had an interesting feeling. You said it wasn't so good. I thought it was incredible. I just looked it up to see if there was other similar work, whatever. I,

I don't even know what you even say, but I do agree with you. It is grounds for ghosting. I think it's such a weird thing to do. At first, it sounds like pathetic, but it's not. It does sound pathetic. It's not pathetic, though. It's like in the realm of like pathological lying. You're right. I feel like if she even like confronts it, who knows what other stories like. You're right. He's going to be pulling that. He's like, that guy actually stole from me. Oh, my God. Someone's using my work.

He's like, I have to go find this guy. And then he just never talks to her again. That's a good point, Eldis. Yeah. I just feel for her. I can see this guy trying to claw out of a confrontation with moralized... That's a very good point. That is a very good point. And you know what? Ultimately...

if this was somebody that was more important to you, maybe then you have to confront him. But it's like, look, sometimes you take L's when you're dating. Just happens. You took it later in the process than you put a like. This guy revealed himself to be a fucking...

potential psychopath later on. Like, yeah, if he lies about this, what else has he been lying about? She also said she hasn't really revealed what she's into. Like, is this guy doing the whole stalking her social media and pretending to be a different guy? Like, is he doing, like, a little talented Mr. Ripley thing of, like, being...

of creating a personality to, you know, impress her. Because, like, if he did this, who knows what other shit he did, you know? So the guy she might even be into might be a fake guy that doesn't exist, and the actual guy is some, you know, kind of shapeshifter that's just, like, looking for approval and head. So, anyway...

It's to your level of comfort, our friend. If you want to confront him, confront him. But we think you're cleared for a ghosting. And if he's like, in fact, if you ghost him and he's like, hey, haven't heard from you, then you can be like, look, this might be a little weird, but I just had a feeling and I reverse image searched that thing you sent me. And I just don't. And then you give him the opportunity to maybe explain himself. But even then, I just feel like.

You're trying to do something really intentional with dating. She got to know him first. It's like, I think you're on the right path. You took a little L. You're that much closer to an actual good relationship, though. We say it all the time. The road to a win is littered with losses. And so you just took an L and just keep it pushing. You're good. But that is fucking weird as fuck. I mean, not that I haven't pretended to be somebody else to fuck. LAUGHTER

Of course, of course. But I just wore a mask and actually turned my person into someone else. Yeah, exactly. I just sort of pretended to be into stuff that I... I pretended a girl... Some girl I hooked up with had, like, pet rats. And I pretended that wasn't fucked up to get pussy. LAUGHTER

I was like, oh, these guys are cute. It was fucked up. Yeah, it was weird. But honestly, Pussy was pretty good. She was out of her mind. Oh, man. The good old days. The Baltimore days. All right. What else we got here, Eldis? Hey, Stav. Hey, Eldi. I have a predicament with my...

son. I am raising a 7th grader and an 8th grader and a 7 year old. Up until recently, my son, the 7th grader, has been such a sweet boy, so loving and so fun, and now he's just turned into a little fucking asshole. I know it's an age-appropriate, age-old fucking problem that everyone goes through with their middle schoolers.

But I just can't seem to get through to him. And I feel like it's such a cliche, but he has wonderful grades. He gets three A's, one or two B's, mostly A's. School's too easy for him. And he and his friends just sit there and fuck around all day. He gets detention, and then two days later he's getting suspended. Like, I can't. I can't do this anymore. He's becoming increasingly disinterested.

He used to love sports. Now he doesn't want to play anymore, but I think it's more so all of his shit-ass stupid friends don't like to play sports, so now he wants to be like them.

and I had to take the discord away because it's like digital lord of the flies you know I don't want to fucking scare him but they're saying mean things to the one kid and I'm like trying to paint a picture of like don't put things in writing you know people take things seriously and now do I tell him like you're gonna make this kid kill himself one day like what I want to be real with him I want to set his expectations for consequences of like these are real world things that happen like

What do I do? I can't take away his shirt anymore. He doesn't have anything left. He doesn't care. He doesn't care about positive reinforcement. What do I do short of just wringing his neck like Homer Simpson? I know you don't have kids, but maybe you can have some insight since you're

Head Brothers and your poor mom went through it too. Oh yeah, my mom definitely went through it. Thanks, love you. Bye. I actually do feel like this woman is my mom. She sounds like her. I feel bad because I definitely was, I mean, I never got, I didn't really get suspended that much, but I definitely went through the like,

perfect little angel and then I got to middle school and my mom put me in a really good school but I had the opposite problem of this kid where I was I was always the smartest kid like uh you know we are in elementary I was a really smart kid and I get to sixth grade and it's the top Baltimore she's really fucked up I mean it's probably similar to Detroit where the public schools are fucked up but Baltimore you had this thing I don't know if Detroit did where there's like

magnet programs where there's like three schools that was like really... They basically like tested the smartest kids and just were like, all right, it's going to be bullshit. 80% of these kids are fucked, but this 20% might get to go to college. So I got to go to like... There's like three schools that were really like truly the smartest kids in the city in terms of standardized tests.

But I got there and I was the dumbest kid there because it's like the smartest kids in the whole city. So I was like, oh, I'm just going to fucking start cheating off these kids. Like, I don't have to learn anymore. And that's when I developed into being kind of the class clown and...

But it was never this bad. I never really got into that many fights or anything like that. I mean, I started selling weed in high school, but that was... I always kind of covered all my bases. I never really let it get back to my parents. But I definitely... This is a tough thing to have to deal with where...

I do think particularly sometimes kids just turn around that age, but I mean, you literally have kids. I literally have kids that are this age. Oh, wow. So I have a middle schooler who was super sweet and then he start to get this turn and the turn specifically comes from that discord. It comes from his friends because that's where he's learning to

to be the person you know cause the reason he was sweet is because he was around you yeah right right you were your best friend yeah yeah but now he has friends that are like independent of you and and they are the wildest people in the world they were like protect the kids protect the kids man fuck them

fuck them kids man them kids it's like the worst shit ever bro you should listen to the way they talk to each other on that discord so he learning all of that stuff from the discord and the games that they play like they say the meanest things possible to each other and so that's where he's

getting the energy from. And he don't want to play sports because he's like, why the fuck I don't play sports and get all tired and shit when I can just sit here and talk shit with these motherfuckers and play sports on this game? You know, so it's a difficult thing to navigate through because you feel like this person is not who I...

I don't know who this little shit is that actually stinks in my fucking house now along with talking shit to me and I still gotta buy them shit. It's a difficult thing so I espoused the

Homer Simpson method. Because that sounds like that's the only thing that's going to work on this little ass. He already took away all his goddamn privileges. He don't get no supper, nothing, anything.

So what else is left? You know what I'm saying? Fuck that little nigga up. You still bigger than him right now. You only got two more years left. So you better help him get it out. So hit your kids, I guess. Beat that shit out of them motherfuckers. That's the only thing that's going to work. Oh, fuck. That's so, yeah, I mean, I don't, this is really tough. I mean, because I do think there's just,

I just had a bad relationship with my family at different points. And I don't know. I just do think there's a little bit of... They have to go through that shit. Like, they have to just... I don't know. Have you, like, with... Is there other ways you've dealt with it? Like, have you... Were any of your other kids... Were they shitty? Like, you have older kids too, right? So it's like... So I got lucky because...

I got really lucky in this, this sense because, you know, so I have two older kids and two younger kids. And during this time period, like where the middle school age, well, first of all, my, my, my son, he didn't even go to middle school cause he was his mom. And so, uh,

He was homeschooled, so I didn't go through that part with him. And my daughter, she... So strange saying she when she's right there. She's in the room off camera. She's like, what is he going to say about me? Like, her... She did well in school, but, you know, her issues was just, like, attitude-wise. Yeah, yeah. So, you know...

wanting to get in the fights and having attitudes and like dealing with that, which is a very tough thing to do as a parent. Like when you have like a little kid that feel like they could just say whatever to you. Like that is a very difficult thing to not punch them in the fucking face. You know, so that's why I was like, you know, I was able to escape

Knock her ass out. But you, my lady, might have to do that. That's crazy. Yeah, I mean, I don't... I mean, I do think saying that there might be consequences and like... Because this is the problem with when you get to this age is that

You don't understand how the world works at all. You've never really felt consequences. Your parents have done everything for you. And you're starting to... Lord of the Flies is perfect because it's like everything's taken care of. You don't really have to worry about anything. And now you can just be like...

you could just be a dickhead for the first time and you don't, you haven't felt any consequences. And so I'm trying to think like what kept me, what kind of kept me in check. Because she says, she says that he doesn't care about like the stuff being taken away. You know what was fucked up? I mean, him not caring about sports sucks because I do think that honestly kept me from not, from not doing like,

Because I didn't... My grades had to be a certain level to stay on the teams I was playing. I played soccer, I played basketball in middle school. And I remember... I didn't really give a fuck what my parents thought, but I was like, fuck, I had made the... I had made the basketball team in eighth grade, which is huge for me. And then, of course, I went and I just... I was this size in eighth grade. I just didn't get any taller. And so I remember I went out in high school and they were like, well, of course, no. No.

You're 5'7". You're not playing... You want to go get in the water? You're not playing... You want to get in the water? Yeah. It's like literally the center on our team was 6'8". It's like, you know, you're not playing in this... Baltimore City League is good. But it was a... So I just remember failing like geometry and being like... Caring because my coach was going to see it, not my mom. Like I didn't really give a fuck...

Like, I definitely, I do think kids hit this age of, like, I don't care what my parents think. And, in fact, fuck my parents. Damn. When you're 13, you're like, I'm fucking, like, you're just like, who cares? Right. Like, I'm a badass. I'm a grown man. When you're, like, 12, you start thinking shit like that. And so, I don't know. I mean, the not, because, yeah, I don't know what you...

take away from somebody like this. My brother was kind of like this. My brother, like, he didn't give a fuck about anything. He was always the hardest to discipline because I cared about sports. My other brother cared about sports too. And, and like, you know, I wanted to be out. I cared about my friends. I cared about hanging out. But that's the problem with like, Discord is like, you can hang out at home. Right. They all hang out at home. Whereas like, they took away being able to go. Who the fuck is that?

Sorry, the bell rang. We don't have another guest today, but maybe it's an Amazon delivery. Maybe it's her son. You know what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He got my IP address. So, yeah, for our friend here. So part of it, which I think, I don't know if this is your feeling too, is like you kind of have to live through the worst parts of it, I think. I do think there's a little bit of like,

This is hard because it's sort of the precursor to sending your kid away to college. Yeah. Where it's like, this is the first time you don't control every aspect of their life. Yeah. And you have to hope you did a good enough job. Right. When they were a baby through 10, that in middle school, some part of your parenting is sticking to it. Right. And I think all you can do is keep him out of like,

truly bully this kid until he kills himself trouble. Like, keep him out of that. And, you know, you haven't taken anything away anymore. And it's like,

I don't know if there's anything positive. He doesn't care about sports. He doesn't care about any of that stuff. I mean, but it's such a thing. Short of moving to a better neighborhood. Like that. Discord, they don't matter where you are. But it could be seminal to something that is a bigger problem. So that's why you got to try to jump on it earlier because, you know, they're in a coming of age situation.

Yeah. Yeah.

So I don't know. He does have to go to school. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do feel for our caller here because that is tough. I don't have kids, but I would tell this mom, go to patreon.com slash Stavisworld and become a member of the Stavisworld Patreon. All members get access to the Stavisworld Discord, a very beautiful, supportive community we foster there. We do have a beautiful community there. That is true. That would be a good influence on me. Again, that's patreon.com slash Stavisworld.

Yeah dude I don't know This is so fucked up This is the crazy part About having kids And I don't even know If I want to have kids And it's the shit like this That would scare me Where it's like

You just don't have control over how a kid turns out at some point. And everyone goes through their shitty little rebellious phase. And I think all you can do is make sure he doesn't get... Do your part to just impart the consequences of it. Yeah. And if they don't want to hang out with you, they don't want to hang out... Like, you can't also be like the cool parent. That doesn't fucking work.

Yeah, because to him, you just mom that get on his nurse. Yeah, you just kind of have to let him work through it a little bit. And I don't know. I'm trying to think about the shittiest I ever was as a kid. I don't know. For some reason, I always just kept it away from my parents. Like we were shitty little kids and we were doing fucked up stuff. But I kind of kept my mom out of it. Were you scared of one of your parents? Yeah, I was kind of scared of my dad, but not.

But I was scared of him because he was like, my dad had a fucking anger problem. I was scared, but I didn't respect him. You know what I mean? So it was like, I was like, damn, I hope he doesn't punish me, but fuck him was kind of the... That was kind of the vibe in the household where it's like, so I was doing... But he wasn't really plugged in. So it was like, I was doing... You know, like middle school is when I started drinking. Like I would like, not a lot, but like there's a couple... You know, it was just like the times I started getting into like...

And then by freshman year of high school, I was just smoking a lot of weed and just trying to be... Damn, freshman year? Freshman year was the first time I smoked weed. How did you get in the house smelling like weed? I didn't... I smoked... Well, what's funny is we started smoking weed before soccer practice. That was my... JV soccer was so shitty and we didn't... The coach was such a fucking dumbass that we were just getting high. I remember getting high behind the CVS.

and then going to practice. And then, you know, it was more of a like, because that's the other thing is I was a latchkey kid to some extent too, where it was like my mom, my dad was, he had his own business and my mom worked, she wouldn't get home until late and she worked two jobs. So we would go to like the rec center. Like we had a lot of, there was a lot of latitude for us to get into trouble where our parents didn't see it. So part of me wonders if there's like, you might be too observant of your son's life. Like there is something to that where it's like,

Parents really shouldn't have access to... And yeah, we said horrific shit to each other too. It just was never in writing. So there's a little bit of me that to give her some positivity is like, yes, teenage kids are monsters. 12 through fucking 14 is so shitty. Middle school kids are the worst kids and they're so mean to each other. And I just think you gotta... You don't have to be as plugged in. Like how much time did I really spend with my parents?

They both were, I mean, my dad said he was always working. He was just hanging out with his boys. There's like at the Greek coffee shop and he would like work like one day really hard, but like he was never home anyway. He wasn't working, but it wasn't home. And my mom was working two jobs. And, and I think about the time I actually spent with my parents, like,

I don't know, four hours a week. Like the more, the most I saw my mom was when she would drive me cause I had to drive across town and she had a job around there. And so the most I saw her was she would either with the days of her, when we were carpooling, she drove us and we would literally chat,

Like that was the most I talked to my mom was when she drove me to and from middle school when I wasn't getting a ride with somebody else. But it's like other than that, it's like, you know, you're playing basketball, you're out and about, you're playing video games with me and my brothers, like you're in your own room. So part of this might be you're just two. Did y'all have to eat dinner as a family?

Not really, because my dad was never that... Like, we did it every once in a while, but it was more like a go just fucking... Go warm this shit up. Literally, yeah. There was like food. It was like, yeah, it was just like go...

Me and my brothers would have like, we would eat together because we got home at the same time. But it was like, and my mom sometimes we would eat together. But no, it wasn't like, we never had like the traditional family dinner thing. So part of me wonders if our caller is a little too observant of her son's life. So what's your fault? You know, not really her fault, but like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let this nigga do what he gotta do. Yeah.

Honestly, to some degree, yes. To some degree, yes. And so I don't know. But now, if his grades are dropping and he doesn't want to play sports, that's different, but...

You might just need to give it a second and see what happens here and not constantly worry. And that's hard to say about your kid. I get that. But, you know, I'm sure it felt that way when your kids were in middle school. Like, you know, you just kind of had to let it. I feel like you just got to let your kids get to run. You know that that shit had to run its course. I feel like on some level. Right. Yeah. I mean, well, what were your nonviolent solutions? Yeah.

Just punitive. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's...

Tough for me because, like, they weren't staying with me when they were in middle school. So I'm going through the middle school thing now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm doing it now. I'm actively doing the middle school thing now with my 12-year-old. You know, so, you know, this is my experience with having it right now. And, you know, I'm kind of like a helicopter parent. You know, I am...

I'm strict, but also very lenient. You know, I allow you to, if you do the right shit, if you take care of what you're supposed to do, like, I kind of let you do whatever. Like, the only deal breakers I have is, like, no drinking or smoking. Yeah. For the rest of your life. That's it. Yeah. I get that, though. And maybe there is something to that. And she says she doesn't care about...

I mean, you know, it might be a phase and it also might... He might just break after a certain point. You know what I mean? Like, after a certain point of having this shit taken away, he might actually start to cave a little bit or he might give in to some positive. And I think it's important to just kind of, like, make yourself a resource to...

if he's ever in trouble. Like, I think this is the point where you're like, you're not going to be friends anymore. So like for at least this part of his life and he'll come back around. Like when he gets older, you will, you definitely will. And when he starts seeing things from your perspective, but I think it's important to just like,

Be make sure he knows he can go to you if he's in trouble because he might get into some if he gets into some serious trouble. You don't want him making it worse by not reaching out to you. Right. And then if he ever does open up to you, because that would happen randomly to where it's like every once in a while, you just do want to, you know, after doing the tough, I'm a fucking grown up shit. You know, you might need some support and just be there. And it's just not it's like a not fulfilling relationship. Right.

Tina Fey was on a talk show and she talked about having a teen. She has a teenage daughter and she was like, it's kind of like having a crush on someone because it's like you think about them all the time and they don't care if you live or die. You know, it's like an unrequited crush and it's like, that's kind of how it is. You got to kind of play it cool, I think, unfortunately, but good luck. That sucks. You can hear it in her voice how much, how,

how like stressful it is. And yeah, shit like this is like, like when I'm playing with my kid's baby, I'm like, I could have it or my friend's baby. I'm like, Oh, this could be fun having a kid. And then when you hear shit like this, it's like, I'm good. I'm good. I'm built. I'm built to be a stepfather. I'm built to come in. They've already done all their raising of them. All right. What else we got? Oh, this got it. You got a couple more here.

In the future guys, we really don't need to know you fucked up the first time.

But basically what happened here is I have two brothers, same upbringing. My one brother, my younger brother, did nothing his entire life. Dragged his feet. My dad actually wrote his college papers, got him through college. Seven years for an undergrad. I graduated in three and a half. Been working my ass off as a data scientist now for about 10 years. Finally bought a house in Napa for a million bucks.

And so I'm real proud of myself just to come to, uh, you know, it's Christmas dinner and find out that my younger brother who has never done anything and got a job softball pitch to him, six figure job, by the way, uh, he now owns a $1.5 million house, which was purchased entirely by my dad. Um, so I'm, I'm just blown away. I can't, I can't,

process this. I don't know how to go about this. I cut my parents out of my life right now, but I'm not sure if that's the right way to go about this. So any advice would be really great. They also invited us to Christmas this year in Hawaii and they said they had tickets for us and then they uninvited us the day before the flight.

and said that they no longer had tickets for us. So that was another little mindfuck just to throw in there, some evil, just to sprinkle on top. This is crazy. Yeah, so any advice would be greatly appreciated. Give me a call.

I'll give you a call. I'm not giving you a call. This is your home over there. I do feel for this guy. This feels like, okay, this is a classic situation where I would love a little more context. I'd love to get into their parents a little bit. Here's my read, my instant read reaction. This feels like,

the um this happens in like rich families a lot where it's like there's um you know the the

the parents want control and they pick their favorite. And there's always, there's like one motherfucker that's basically Cinderella and, and has to work hard as fuck. Their parents just don't like them as much. And they just kind of exert their power by picking like a favorite who, you know, responds the way the parents want to. And his, his dumb ass brother probably always was a spoiled kid. I mean, seven years in undergrad, uh,

That's fucking weird. You're fucking 25. You're fucking 25 and undergrad. What the fuck? I know. It's so weird. So fucking weird. And this guy, you know, he says he's working his ass off. We do need to know a little more context, but it does feel like for whatever reason, either his parents didn't support him. I mean, we have a friend. We have a couple friends where it's like,

The they feel like their parents just liked another sibling more like that happens sometimes where it's like it's fucked up favoritism and like our friend, our friend, you know, we're all from Greektown. So it's not like no one's buying anyone a one point five million dollar house. It's just like they just are nicer to him or whatever. But we had a friend who I remember growing up, dude.

He was our boy. And he had an older sibling. And his parents would just go all out on birthdays. Like, I remember...

Their birthdays were like two months apart. And, you know, one's in July, one's in August. Or one's in June, one's in August. And I remember during their older siblings' birthday party, at the very end they were like, oh, and by the way, it's our other kid's birthday too. It's a combination. But all the shit was in like... For the first one, for the older ones. So it's like, I think this happens sometimes.

And he clearly has a ton of resentment here. Like, he clearly doesn't fuck with his family. And I think it's because they have mistreated him. They have treated him as like a second-class sibling a little bit here. And so him buying his own house and then his brother getting to just live a better life, probably because his parents just like him more, yeah, that would fuck me up too. That's fucking shitty. I think it is favoritism. I think it's also a little bit of like...

I see this with siblings sometimes where it's like the fuck-ups just get more help because they're less equipped to deal with the world. And I think it's probably a mix of favoritism and that for me here where it's like, you know, this guy's brother just sounds like a dumbass but doesn't really care and he'll be bailed out. And this guy would... Okay, that's a possibility because sometimes...

If you were a complete fuck up, parents would help you. But this guy might have a little self too much self-respect for that. Right. Like this guy might be like, I want to do better. It's a little maybe self-fulfilling prophecy of like, I don't want to be a fuck up. So I'm going to work hard. And it's like, you know, it's the equivalent of like if you live off your parents and you're a completely unselfmade person, like

That should spiritually feel bad. But if you don't give a fuck, that's an easy-ass life. And our caller seems to have too much self-respect to just, you know, do whatever the fuck his parents say and then cash in as a result. Yeah. I feel like...

So me being a parent, I know that you can have favoritism for a chance. Rank them. Let's go. Your daughter's in the room. She's definitely the favorite. You know what I'm saying? I'll buy her a house, but I wouldn't buy my son a big man. There's clearly favoritism based off of how much you like them. Yeah, yeah. No, it's... Yeah, I get that. So, you know, I just wonder...

you know, kind of like he has his million dollar house that he went earnestly. Yeah, you're good. You're in a better position. And he has that. And so, you know, why is he even tripping on the fact that they did that? And maybe he is the fuck up the other, the other one. And they got to help him. What I wish I had,

further lucidity on is him saying that they invited him to Christmas and then they canceled the ticket before, but he didn't say why they canceled the ticket. Like was, was he like, like excoriating them and like harassing them and they knew there was going to be a whole bad thing and it was going to be cantankerous with the family if they showed up because he's clearly aggrieved about the fact that they're

you know, they gave him this house and so is he causing trouble? You know, like, is he being truculent with his parents and they're like, look, this is not gonna work out for us so let's just not even have them. He didn't share that part with us. Yeah, I mean, I think part of it probably is that

To me, what this reads between buying someone a $1.5 million house and having tickets to Hawaii and taking them away to the point where to them it's not a big deal. To me, that's why to me it reads a little bit of rich family that's trying to control you with money.

their, you know, with their presence, right? Like, to me, this feels like some, not quite as rich as Succession, but like, truly like, the parents really want to feel like they're in charge of everything and they're using these little carrots and sticks to,

you know, to exert control over their adult children. They're trying to still, they want to still treat them as if they can do whatever the fuck they want. And so I agree with you about, I'd like to know more, but I think, and I think your point about who gives a fuck, you are self-made. You did get, you'd have bought your house. You did work hard as fuck. The, the, um,

the reward for that is your life where you don't depend on anyone. This guy, your brother, is a pathetic guy. Like, he's a fucking loser. He's lucky that if he had grown up in fucking Greektown or Detroit, this guy's fucked, right? Like, he'd be on pills right now. You know what I mean? Like, with a roommate as a 40-year-old man. He's lucky. And I get feeling the...

You almost are like, why don't my parents help me that way? It's like, honestly, dude, it sounds like your parents are manipulative, rich fucking dickheads that their handouts are never...

They always, if it's just from the little information, it would come with strings attached. And you are a guy who didn't want strings attached and you should be proud of that because it's hard not to fucking, honestly, like I do have a lot of resentment towards like people who had a lot of shit handed to them. Just, you know, I didn't grow up with any money and I, you know, and I worked hard to get to where I am. And I do have, especially, I know, you know how it is in the entertainment industry where half these motherfuckers are just somebody's kid. Right. And that's really frustrating. Um,

But and so I get that. But for him, I think this is an opportunity to really interrogate how you feel about your family. Right. Like he clearly made a snap decision to cut his parents out. And I don't think it's just about this. I think this is just the you know, this is the like the moment where it became clear where it all started.

Even without him realizing his feelings, it's almost like his emotions overrode his brain and were like, fuck these people. I'm tired of this bullshit. And I think if you have to really think about

This clearly is a manifestation of their family's dynamic, right? One guy works hard as shit because he won't, like, you know... And again, I'm just guessing. You probably weren't as, like, reverential to your parents as you wanted, so they made your life harder than your dumb brother who just, you know, said whatever the fuck they wanted to hear.

And your family sounds like there's some toxic shit going on there. And I would... I don't know the specifics. I don't know if cutting them out completely is fully warranted. But it sounds like you have a lot of problems with these people. It sounds like you have a lot of resentment towards your parents. It sounds like they might have poisoned the well between you and your siblings. Like, I know me and my brothers had issues. I mean, we're good now. We're all very close, like, as adults. But...

In my 20s, dude, I was mad at my family and I didn't know why, right? And I went through some therapy. You figure it out. It's like, oh. I mean, it comes down to my fucking dad. My dad fucked everybody up. Like, where we all got anger problems because we grew up in a, you know, in a slightly abusive household. And...

all the chaos in our house, we just took it out on each other. And it was always hard for us to, you know, and this was really just inherited anger from our dad that we all pointed towards each other. And when we figured that out, and when I worked through that, it's like, oh, I, and even to this day, when we get into these arguments, sometimes my brothers, it's because we still haven't worked all that toxic shit out of our system. So I think our caller needs to really think about

I think what you're describing is clearly fucked up. Something's fucked up. We don't have enough information on it, but I think you're well within your rights to spend a little time away from your family, figure out what bothers you. You know, this is disrespectful. I would feel like, are you fucking kidding me? This guy just gets a better life.

But at the same time, you have a great life. You don't want these people to ruin your shit. But I did spend, I spent, dude, my 20s, like I lived in Baltimore. I lived across town, but I saw my family less when I lived in Baltimore in a different neighborhood than I do now that I live in New York because I just wanted, I needed to do my own thing from like 23 to 25. I needed like two years to just kind of like

you know, figure out what the fuck was eating away at me. And I think our caller needs to do a little bit of that too, because I think his family's fucked up. We don't know why, but it's like, there's definitely that sibling dynamic, but also like, did we nail his parents? Like, are they like these cold, rich people? I don't know. We might be completely off, but there's definitely something he needs to work through, I think. What, you got time for one more? Yeah. Let's do it.

So fun, dude. Thanks for coming. It's been a really fun episode. Oh, hell yeah. Yo, what's up, stuff? First time, long time. I'm calling about a situation. There was this girl I went to elementary school with, so grades one to six, and I was kind of an asshole to her at the time. Oh, boy, I wonder where this is going. Let me pause this. Here's my guess.

Found her profile popped up on Facebook and he wants to know how he can fuck her now. That's my guess. That's my guess. Let's see how it goes. It's interesting to hear this. We oftentimes get this perspective from the girl who is now hot and is taking it out on the world. You almost never hear it from the dickhead's perspective, but let's find out. Maybe I'm wrong, but I could just tell by the like...

There's a sort of embarrassment in his voice and also a pussy thirst in his voice that I hear that I think that's what it is, but maybe not. Let's see. At the time, I called her ugly and slut and just really mean shit.

In elementary school, you're calling her a slut? You motherfuckers are under that big giant rainbow thing in gym class and you're calling her a fucking slut at that? That's crazy, dude. Anyway. Oh, I'm slow.

Somehow, I've just dodged every chance I've had of, like, meeting them together. And I don't know. I was just curious, like, you know, because eventually I'm going to meet her. Like, I think we're going to get married. I was curious if you had any advice of, like, what to do. Like, should I, like, just go up to her and just, like, apologize right away? Like...

Wow. That's crazy. Okay, so I was wrong. This is a more nuanced scenario where it's like... That's actually... This is much more interesting. Someone you bullied comes into your life...

Like as the significant other of a family member. That's very interesting. I'm trying to think if this has ever happened. Nothing like this has ever happened to me. What would you do then? Like if you felt like you were him?

Well, you know, this could happen. I do... I hate to really look back at what my elementary and middle school life was like because I definitely had some... You don't even remember her fucking... I know, it's tough. But I definitely had some bully tendencies. I definitely... I definitely, like...

I feel bad for these kids. It turns out I'm professionally good at making fun of people. And so sometimes I feel bad for like... I was just practicing. I feel bad because I would let some kids... And look, it happened because I was insecure. I wasn't happy with my shit. And I think I got bullied and then I was like... I realized like, wait, I'm funnier than these people. And then I was also like... Before elementary, I was a big fat kid. I was kind of strong. I could scrap a little bit if it needed to get there. But...

So I think this, this is, it's not another realm of possibility that's like, I have met people as an adult that, that I did in my head. I was like, Oh, we were friends. And they were like, yeah, man, you bullied the fuck out of me. Can you imagine you thinking that you, I mean,

That's my guy. Oh, that's my friend. That's my little... Like, they hate you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because, like, a lot of my little brother's friends I would just fuck with as, like, an older... Yeah, you liked them. I fucked with them. And even, like, and especially there's, like, hazing in sports because I played a lot of sports. So you would, like, you would fuck... Like, they fucked with me as a freshman, so I would fuck with the freshman when I was a senior. But... So this has... Stuff like this has happened to me. And honestly, I am just completely apologetic. That's all you can do. You should be like, look, man, I...

We were kids. I was a fucking idiot. I was insecure. I really apologize. That was fucking crazy. And my...

my memories, like, we have, I still have, like, I think positively, and I hope we can just be cool. And honestly, everybody's gotten it because everybody also knows, like, unless the kid, like, now there were some kids that bullied me that are in jail and had lead paint poisoning, right? Those kids are never gonna come to, those kids are never gonna, like, you're never gonna have an emotional, like, apology from them because, you know, they're, like, fucking, you know, they're never getting out. Or, like,

Or they don't have the fucking mental capacity to even remember what the fuck happened.

I think that's good. I think that is good advice. Me personally, because I'm so non-confrontational that I just feel like I would definitely hope that she didn't remember. And I just try to be what he said, especially nice to her. Super nice, overdo it. And so that she gets this. Look, that is a possibility. Yeah, true. But

But I do understand how you can try and gain empathy for someone by being contrite and letting them know that at that juncture of your life, you're just a stupid kid that was going through your own issues or whatever. And you're just being a dumb kid. And it doesn't represent who you are as a person today. And it doesn't, by the way. It really doesn't. That's not just bullshit. That is true. And I also think on some level, you're guilt about it.

You have paid, you have, it's like he's made up for it because he probably thinks about it more than she does at this point. Like, and so I would just, you know, I know you mean about not being, about being non-confrontational and definitely that's my nature too, but.

I think sometimes you just have to do the hard, you have to have the hard conversation, you have to do the hard thing, and you'll feel so much better. I also think she'll appreciate it. Like, I also think it's the kind of thing where, because if you're just kind of nice, if you're overly nice and you don't say what it's about, that to me can be like, that to me is almost worse because it's like,

He knows what he did. And he's not bringing it up. You know what I mean? It's like... He's doing something... It's like if you know... Because there's also the possibility that... This is a long time ago. Some people don't even think about it, right? And it's like... That's probably annoying if you're somebody who was bullied and you think about it all the time. But then sometimes...

Like, there's definitely kids who, if I really think about it, were really shitty to me that I don't fucking care anymore. He's talking about elementary school. He might be younger than us, and he's talking about 20 years. So it's like he's about the same age range if you're like 9, 10, or whatever, and it's 20 years later. But there were definitely kids who were super shitty to me that I'm like, who cares? We were all little kids. So, you know, but I think...

She's not going to feel... An apology isn't going to make things worse. She hasn't, like... Like, it even... I mean, the one thing is there's a possibility that she doesn't even remember, but odds are if you've been thinking about it this much, you were probably so shitty that she does remember. So... So, like, I say the apology doesn't hurt anything, especially if there's going to be a family member. I mean, you're talking about...

I think an apology would be nice if you bumped into this lady at the grocery store and you never saw her again. But if she's marrying into your family, she's been dating your cousin for three years, then I think it's extra important that you just start off... And again, you're adults...

That relationship doesn't have to be what it was in elementary school. And you just start off on a clean slate. And I think, you know. Unless you lied and it wasn't elementary school. It was three weeks ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've been cyber bullying her this whole time. So, yeah, dude. Just apologize. Just man up and just, you know, pay the piper for your poor behavior as a seven-year-old right now.

But yeah, I think that's going to do it. Unless you have like a quick fun one or was that? I think that was kind of it. All right. Fuck you, Elders. Are all of those green things, all of these? Yeah, it's a bunch of calls. Yeah, all those tabs are up there, a bunch of calls. We have a ton of calls. We have like what, thousands? Thousands? How do you weed through those? We need to hire someone to actually go through it. But Elders just fucking picks the first 20 usually. Oh, he doesn't even look at them before. Some people are really fucked. No, he does. I stream all of them.

All of them. He's a screener. All 3,000, though. We keep talking about it. Actually, I've talked about it. I'm going to just say it on the pod so that I remember to do it. We've been meaning to reach out to our old producer. I used to do this on Twitch. So my producer, Ralph, I've been meaning to reach out to her. We'll get it going if she's available to go through it. But we do need to go through all these. I almost want to do like a... We should do like a lightning round thing.

where we try and clear as many as we can. Or maybe a live stream, a lightning round live stream where we try and clear some of these. Because I do feel bad for people who called in, but...

So these are from how long ago? Oh, who knows? No, not years, but months. Oh. Well, this one is pretty, oh, this was from February. And they have to randomly watch every episode hoping that they're selected. Look, it's not a real, I'm not a real fucking therapist. Ultimately, ultimately. It must be right. Yeah, it's like, look, we hope we can help you, but we're just trying to pay the bills around here.

We're trying to make entertainment here. If we accidentally help people, great. Punch a kid in the face, lady. But who knows?

but I think that's going to do it for us dude thanks for coming Paige this was great thank you very fun episode check out the projects check out the mixtape check out the album guys we'll have that stuff linked and yeah that's going to do it for watch the Meg watch Leprechaun Leprechaun back to the let's plug your movies from 20 years ago Leprechaun

back to the hood let's watch that that's actually a fucking classic hold on can i tell a lep in the hood story of course the early days i was dating my wife you know the first the first like month or two it was just like i'm just doing all this research like where could we go this way trying to wow her i remember you lived in that bedroom i remember us talking about i remember helping you pick out your little outfit yeah then one day she was like oh i feel bad you're like picking all these dates and stuff uh

I want to put a date together for us. She's like, let's go see this one movie. That's Jennifer Aniston in it or something? It was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the first one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, okay, sure. Yeah. And we go to the theater.

And the movie was Leprechaun in the Hood. She thought it was the first Leprechaun? Yeah, yeah. It was like Leprechaun in the Hood. It was like a really late showing on like a Friday. It was like 10 or 11 or something. Oh, and people were probably fucked up in there just having a good time. That's the one with Ice-T? Yeah. Oh, my God. Wow, that's beautiful. I had no idea. Yeah. And I was like, wow, what the fuck is this movie? It was Leprechaun in the Hood. Wait, you hadn't seen it before?

No, I think, no, I don't think so. Why do I have, why do I have a memory of seeing it at your house as kids? Maybe I'm all, maybe we did as kids and I just forgot or something. Cause we would go to eldest. Eldest's family was even more foreign than mine. They were fresh, fresh off the boat. And so his parents, you could get away with watching a lot of fucked up shit at his house. And he had, I'll give him credit. He had internet before me, even though he was much poorer than I was. Uh, and I was poor by the way. I'm not saying like eldest's family, uh,

But we could really... Yeah, these motherfuckers were barely scraping by. And yeah, I just remember us watching a lot of shit that would never have flown in my... Because we had... Between our four parents, my mom actually could speak and read English. And the three... My dad and both his parents were like...

Especially when we were like six and seven. It was kind of iffy. So we could get by with a lot of shit at Eldest's house. Wait, how do you... When you're six and seven, how do you know if you're poor? Like, you're just... That's just your life. Yeah. Unless you got friends that are like way different. I guess by having poor friends, I didn't know really how poor we were, I guess. Yeah, Eld... I didn't... I never... Yeah, I was like, damn, Eldest is... I remember as a kid being like, poof, that motherfucker's poor. And then like...

And then going to middle school and then going to my middle school friend's house and being like, oh, wait, I'm poor. I was like, what the fuck? I'm the eldest. Yeah, yeah. Because in elementary school, I really was their eldest. I remember kids coming over to my house and being like, what the fuck? Being like, are you serious? This is where you live? Like, look, it's a roach. Yeah, dude, literally. We lived in like a little townhouse with...

Me and my brothers all had one room. My grandma was in the room next to us and my parents had like a room downstairs. And it was closed quarters for sure. Like I remember when I went to my friend's house that had... And then Eldest...

flipped it on us because his family moved to the burbs and they started just doing better i mean they're probably in an underwater more underwater in their mortgage eldest is still paying off his fucking family's house his poor sister had to move into their fucking suburban house uh but still it was like this motherfucker had a yard i was like what the how did this happen yeah they did have the glow up but he also abandoned us he went to the burbs

He was too good for us. He went to the county. Hoity-toity-ass motherfucker. Sometimes you got to. Want a slice of that American dream pie? Truly. Your parents didn't come from Albania to live in a first-floor two-bedroom with their entire family. Well, that's going to do it for us. I'd like to end on reminding everyone how impoverished we were. But again, Eldis was poorer than me, for the record.

That's going to do it, folks. Dude, Paige. Oh, yeah. Definitely. Yeah, yeah. That is true. I flipped it on you. You were in the burbs, and now it's like, how about that, motherfucker? We're back. We're back. We're back to where we were. The natural order of things has finally gotten back. But that's going to do it, Paige. Thanks so much, man. Great episode. Thank you. Thanks for coming on, and we'll see you next time, guys. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.