Riamis, we have a very exciting bonus episode for you today that we just recorded this morning with a very special guest. Her name is Hannah Brown, and we are going to be talking about all things Vanderpump Rules and that iconic, disgusting, heart-wrenching finale that aired last night.
Hannah Brown is an LA-based actor, content creator, and host. When she's not oversharing on TikTok, she co-hosts a Gossip Girl podcast called You Know You Love Us. In her free time, she enjoys hashtag bad culture, smut, and putting together outfits to trick herself and others into thinking she has her shit together. Her self-imposed big three are Martin Short Son, Valerie Cherish Moon, and Bonnie Hunt Rising. Enjoy the episode with Hannah Brown.
Oh my gosh, hi! Hannah!
How are you doing? Good. How the hell are you doing? How are you doing emotionally? How are you doing physically? Oh my gosh. I'm weathered. I'm exhausted. I'm unwell. Same. We literally woke up and we were like, we feel slightly hungover, but like not sure if it's from the wine, if it's from the emotions. I know. I couldn't watch that shit sober. No way. Oh, absolutely not. But I did put it on this morning again.
Yes. We've had to watch like little snippets. Yeah. Oh, same. There's just so much to unpack. And I like took notes and even now I'm still like, shit, did I like, there's just so much. We're going to get through it together. We are. We're here for support. Are you in LA? I am. Where are you guys? We're in LA too. We're on the West side.
I didn't know that was so fun. We'll do it in person next time. Yeah. I like never venture to the West side, but anytime I do, I'm like, it's so nice over here. Where are you?
It's really dark. I'm in Valley Village. I'm in the eye of the storm. Oh my God, the scene of the crime. The scene of the crime. Raquel lives like a stone's throw from my home. Stop it. So I used to live in the building that Katie lives in now. The one right next to Gelson's? Yes, exactly. Like right off of Laurel Canyon. Oh, I'd know it from a mile away. I saw the exterior shot. I was just like... Triggered. Triggered. Truly. Okay.
Oh my gosh. It looks like a decent building though. Like there's probably some amenities. Yeah, it was nice. Like we had washroom and fire. Yeah. I mean, you need it. You need it in the Valley. You do. So true. How long have you been in LA?
Five years. Oh my gosh. Almost to the day. How long have y'all been here? Oh God. It will be 11 years for me next month. I know. It's almost 10 years for me too. I'm like, how the hell? It flies by though. Where are you from originally? I'm from Arkansas originally. And I'm Claire, by the way. Oh yeah. I'm Tess. I'm from the Bay area. Oh, I love that.
Um, wait, we're in Arkansas. I have to ask. Um, I'm from Fayetteville, Springdale. It's Northwest Arkansas. I have a friend from there. What, what's their name? Tyler Meredith.
I don't think I know Tyler, but I usually know everyone truly in Arkansas. Like we all know everyone, each other. It's not my God. What a small freaking world. At least you're from like the coolest part of Arkansas. That is true. When people say they've been to Little Rock, I'm like, please don't say that. You need to go check out Northwest Arkansas. Oh, a Fayetteville sleigh.
Thank you. Thank you for understanding Hannah, but we're so happy that you're doing this episode with us. Yes. Multiple times on everything iconic. We love, love Danny. Love that podcast. You're hilarious as well. Of course. Yes. And we were like, she just seems like she's one of us. Yeah. I need to like pick her brain a little bit. Oh my God. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited and honored to be here. Truly. We're just, what is your relationship like with Bravo? Oh,
It's a long-term relationship at this point because I started watching it in high school, which I hate aging myself, but it was in like, it was in like 2000, I would say like 2007, 2008 was when I really started my love affair with Bravo. It started with Roni. And then when I was in college and Vanderpump Rules came out, I was like, oh, wait a goddamn minute. These people are like closer in age to me. And here's the sick thing. I was
was young and impressionable, I looked up to them. I was like, they're doing what I want to do. I want to be a model slash actor. And I want to move to LA and work at a hot girl restaurant. Like I wanted to be them. That was the dream for all of us. And it's like being able to carry around many wine bottles everywhere you went, like the early days of Dodie. Oh my God. Was our pioneer. Truly. I know. Yeah.
I know. Okay. So, so VPR was like, you were watching it from the beginning in real time. Oh yes. I mean, I, and I think, I think the most amazing thing about this current season is there, they were in a flop era for a long time. I was like, cancel the show enough already. Like the season with like Max and Danica and Dana, like, and I,
As a person, I know her IRL, but like I just that season, like I forget that it happened because it just felt like a totally different show and not the VPR that we knew and loved. No, it was so dark. Like the lizard funeral was so bad. I don't even want to go back there. I actually started from the beginning as well, but I couldn't watch season nine. And I was like, we're done. We're done here. Yes.
Yes. So I feel like what's so good about this season is it feels like that 2010, 2007, like Bethany crying against a car energy of just like, oh my God, I can't believe we get to witness these like raw, brutal moments of humanity. It's so true. I've had an interesting relationship with BPR because I've been
at Housewives and Summer House. Bravo, bravo, girly. And I watched Vanderpump until two months ago. I started from the beginning.
I got up to halfway through season six last week and then I jumped to 10. So it has been my world for two months, like very contained, very intense. I did tell Tessa, I was like, enjoy this while you have it because of season eight and nine and like some of seven too. So, so yeah. So there are some things that I'm like, Lizard funeral, not sure what you're talking about. I'll probably get there next week. You don't need to know. Yeah. I'm sorry. It's new, but it's, um, I fell in love very quickly and was really ashamed. I didn't get in.
sooner. We're just happy to have you. Oh God. I was going to say you've arrived. I feel like I'm fully like in, in the Bravo world now. Like that was the one part holding me back that I always had shame about.
No more shame. No more shame. No more shame at sir or pump or Tom Tom. Oh yes. I've eaten at sir pump and Tom Tom. I have tried to go to Schwartz and Sandy's three times. It is a fucked up place. Can I just go on a tangent here? I used to live in that neighborhood in the like Los Feliz area. So I'm familiar with Franklin village. I'm
misrepresent what that bar is on TV like so much. It's not like it's around the corner of Franklin in a strip mall next to like tail waggers. Tail waggers. I used to take a cat there. Yeah, there you go. And the fucked up thing
up thing is that they're trying to create like we ho culture in a neighborhood that like does not give a fuck about it. So like the times I've tried to go there, they're like, do you have a reservation? And I'm like, no, I'm just going to grab a drink at the bar. They're like, well, those seats are reserved as well. I'm like, we're not in we ho bitch. Like no one wants to deal with that here. So I literally left. I'm like, this is harrowing. No, be grateful that I am here. Literally do shorts and Sandy and we ho where they try and just to like,
get out of the neighborhood or was it like a rent thing? I don't know. Cause I would imagine rent in Franklin village is, is nothing to sneeze at. Maybe it's not as insane as like Santa Monica and Robertson, but right. Well, pump is no longer. I mean, I don't trust that. I really don't. I feel like this is one of like this.
restaurant is on national international television people come from all over the world and you can't afford rent you have a conspiracy theory don't you i just think that something ain't right with finances with the vanderpumps and i'm concerned i and they're selling their house they're selling villa rosa are they actually what financially something is amiss oh no
Something is missed. Yeah. Okay. It's been giving house, like house of cards, not in the Netflix way. Like, like Lisa's life is a house of cards. Like this whole fucking time. Literally. She was so odd not to jump around, but on, not on the finale, but the one before she might, someone said that she might've been wasted. Like, cause it was her birthday and she was day drinking. But I was like, I felt like they shot her up with some uppers and then shoved her out. I've never seen her like that before. No, literally when she.
Okay. There's two moments that my fiance and I have been reliving over and over. There's the moment where she burst into something about her and she goes, there's something about her. Everyone's just like, Hey,
Like jump scare. And then there's a moment in her confessional where she goes, you want something done? Ask a man. You want something done right? I was going to slurs. She slurs drinking a little bit more to compensate for some struggles in her life. Right. Stress.
Right. I mean, it's just like, if you see something, say something. So I'm saying something. Yeah. There is something about her. There is something about her. Wow. Okay. So in your journey with VPR, have you always had the same favorite people? Has it changed like from start to now? What's your relationship like with the characters? Yeah.
I, in season one, hated Stassi, like, violently. I was like, she's such a bitch. Like, who is this person? Season two, I became a hardcore Stass head. I was a Khaleesi for a long time. Yeah. And then, you know, 2020 happened and there was, like, a great reckoning that, you know, everyone had. And I was like...
I don't think I can stand Stassi anymore. I know. The thing about Stassi though, is she has an X factor that even at her worst, she's very watchable. And, and I don't think everyone on the show necessarily has that. So my current favorites, I love me some Sheena Shea and I've had, we love she, she, and I've had some really like,
off moments with Lala where I'm like, God, you're fucking annoying, but I'm back on Lala now. And obviously I love Ariana and plot twist. I'm obsessed with Katie now. So Tess talk about your journey. So, you know, because I've watched it. So in just a matter of really weeks, it felt like the entire, almost the entire series, I had a really hard time with Katie and still in my like mid season six, I am quite frustrated with her. I think about her, like
I'm right. You need to, and I know Schwartz is very toxic with her and like, we can get to that, but I think her whole disposition of like, if you don't agree with me, then you hate me. It like reminds me of like something in like being a teenager, you know, everyone is just so like, you're either like with me or against me. And I find her very immature, but then watching season 10. And I know I have so much to go. I'm like, God, you have grown. And like, I now really feel for you of what you went through in this relationship.
Yeah. I was telling Tess at the beginning when I was watching at the beginning, hated Katie, like just the worst. And I think with all of the characters, with James, with Jax, it's like with time you grow, they become family. And so you're like, I might not like you, but I love you. Wow. And I'm so into you. But Katie really has, I'm with you. I've come a long way with Katie. She was actually a server at Sir when I went in like 2013. So. Was she an amazing server? Yeah.
Um, you know, she did her job. We got the Blackberry cobbler and that's enough for me. That's all you need. Yeah. Um, wait, also, I'm sorry. I feel like I can't believe I forgot DJ James Kennedy. Like he's top of the top. Like I've been obsessed with him forever and everyone's coming around to him now. And I'm like, look, I know he said fucked up things. Okay. Like here's the thing about James Kennedy. He has like
Three to four insults. He'll call you fat, old, like stupid. And like a bitch or a whore. Like sure. He loves the slut, the whore. Yeah. Yeah. But like,
He's not the one like creeping around people's backs and ruining people's lives. Like at least what you see is what you get where you're like, James, you're being such a piece of shit right now. But he's so fucking funny that like all is forgiven, which might be really annoying. Like I know Kristen still fucking hates him, but I'm like, I'm sorry, Kristen. He's really fun to watch. That's fair. He's a confessional king. Are you sexually attracted to him? I wasn't. But now I
Last night in the finale, when he was on the phone talking to Raquel, he was in this like black t-shirt and his neck is giving like Marvel. Like it's so thick now. It is giving Marvel. His body has like, I mean, he just filled out a little bit. And he's tan. And he was like, Raquel, you fucking serious. You're going to blow up your life over some smelly, sendable cock, some stinky 40 year old cock. I was like, he's the funniest. He's the hottest person I've ever met in my life. He's a cab. Believe you're so bloody stupid. Okay. Bye.
We needed that impression is really good. That was great. Thank you. I also love how high his voice gets around. Allie's like, well, you look so beautiful. You look so cute. Raquel, you're so stupid. Like it's so aggressive. Allie is his little like unicorn princess. I love Allie. I think she's using him to get on the show and I'm okay with that. And I love her. And as she was,
She was, she was the whistleblower. I think we should all get tarot card readings together with Allie. I just love nothing more than that. Where does she do it? Virtually? Oh, virtually. Oh, I really want to meet her in person. We will do it in person. Yeah, for sure. Also what's June. Isn't what's happening in June 13th. Thinking of the PR in-person events that we talked about last night. Oh, I'm James Kennedy. See you next Tuesday. Oh yeah. We want to go. We tried to reserve happy hour, but they're not even opening up reservations. Yeah.
Oh my God. We're going. We're going. So we were like, should we just stand in line at 5 p.m. and just be those people? Yes. Have you ever seen him perform live? No. Have you? Oh yeah. Yeah. You guys, I like right when I moved to LA, like the first thing I did was I went to see you next Tuesday. Oh my God. What was it like? I mean, first of all, like, you know, Sarah is like the size of like Harry Potter's like closet under the stairs. Like it's very tiny. Oh, well we'll go. I know we have to. Oh.
It's small. I mean that front area where they like film the most is like actually pretty small. So it gets pretty cramped and like, it's the worst service you've ever had the worst drinks you've ever had. But James really does know how to get the party started. You know, I appreciate that passion he has. And I always feel a little sad when people minimize it because it's like, we all have dreams. We're all,
you know, I'm going to make it in this goddamn place. Yeah. And he seems like a hard worker. He is. He really is. And he stayed consistent with it. And that's the hardest thing to do. So the entire time we will support him. We will. Okay. Well, I know we've been jumping around, but should we get into some, some thoughts last night? Do you have any like first thoughts? Uh, my first thought, God, I mean, I have so many, it's like, what is my first thought? Uh,
Tom Sandoval's crying against the window. I saw a tear on his face a total of one time, but he floppy air quote cried like seven times. And he let those tears fall. Like he, he was pushing them out. And when he was standing over there, he was like, am I in my light? Like he was ready to go. The difference of Ariana wiping away tears because she doesn't want to be like, she's vulnerable and him just letting them drop and being like, I'm going to do this look to get me in.
No, they are like, honestly, it's giving, you know, I'm an actor. And so I went to acting school and like, he's giving like the worst boy in acting school who like I would have bullied at a party. Like he would have started like playing the ukulele at a party and I'd be like, fucking leave. Like, I hate you. And like your tears. We all know. We always talk about like, I was a theater kid as well. Oh,
for a theater kid energy while it can be endearing. The other side of it is so troubling. Like owning a sword, like a samurai sword, owning a sword and, you know, going into a monologue when no one, when you're talking about something completely off topic, it's like he gives that energy. Yeah.
Yes. Like just like peak darkness. Peak darkness. Yeah. I mean that, do you think that was the first time that they had talked Ariana and Sandoval when they sat down or do you think there had already been explosions after explosions? Like in that sort of way? I feel like they probably had like a gnarly talk, like the night that she found the FaceTime. And then I have in my heart and soul, I want to believe that this was the first time they talked since that night.
Well, she said it was hours of footage like cut down into. I'm sure she was like, I'm not speaking to you unless there's other people there and everyone can catch what, you know, the world. Oh, yeah. That's a good point. Also, it's like I just my heart really broke for her. Like I cried. Did y'all cry during the episode? Yes, we did. I really didn't realize like how like impactful their relationship was on us as viewers, because it's like we watched them like fall.
fall in love and like, like make it work. And even though like he, like it was really messy with Kristen, it was like, Oh, it was all worth it. Cause like they're clearly meant to be together and we watched them for so long. And I'm just like to be Ariana and to think like, Oh, once upon a time, like you looked at me that way and you cared about me that way. Like it just breaks my fucking heart. And he never once in that scene said, sorry, I have chills thinking about it. Looking at her with such hatred, no remorse. It was, I hate you. Yeah. Yeah.
And it's so dark. And I think he couldn't apologize because in his head, he's still like, I love Raquel. And so if I say sorry to you, I'm then going to have to say sorry to her for saying that to you. Like he is prioritizing her. So he's giving nothing to Ariana.
He also said at one point, I couldn't tell Ariana because it would blindside Raquel or something like that. And I want to apologize because Ariana is calling her Rachel from Watch What Happens Live. Oh, yes. Follow her. I lead on that. I would love to follow that as well. But it's just so gross. It's like you're still prioritizing Rachel's feelings over Ariana's. And so...
This was so dark when he said, you know what I love? That she treats me with fucking respect. Something I haven't gotten from you in years. And I'm like, this is giving like creepy, abusive, like I want to control my woman. I like a woman who I can control, which honestly Jack said on Watch What Happens Live, like that Sandoval likes Raquel because he can manipulate her. Oh, a hundred percent. And like the way that he's doubling down to her and having no fucking humility about it and making her feel like she has ruined the relationship. Thus, he had no choice.
But to do this, it's like when she asked him, when are you going to see her? And he just said tomorrow and such like casually cruel in the name of being honest. It is there. Wow. It was horrible. And then when she was like, are you going to like kiss and hug and talk about your deep connection? And he goes, I don't know. And she's like, just say no.
I'm like, you're sick. Just say I, he was trying to be like, I'm going to like look her in the eye and finally tell her. Yeah. Cause like she deserves to know the truth. He's just like, he's not okay. The sex thing infuriate infuriates me. Like she has told you so many times how she will have sex with you. And it's an emotional connection. And he wants to go skydiving and eat mushrooms. Like he does not care.
No. And I think like, I like appreciated what she said when she was like, okay, like if you're unhappy, like we could have worked it out. Like we could have gone to couples therapy. Like I was ready to do that. And he kept trying to like twist the reality of the situation on camera so that we would take his side. And I loved that. She was like, you were already fucking my friend. When you said that you were already fucking my friend, when you did that, like, what are you actually talking about? And then when she said, oh my God, when she like was crying, was like,
I would have like followed you anywhere. I would have changed anything you didn't like, which leads me to believe that Ariana and she's been open about how insecure she is like throughout the years.
But like in the early stages of their relationship, I thought she was like so confident and cool. And it like absolutely breaks my heart that like someone that's like beautiful and fun and cool has been feeling so bad about herself for so long that she was willing to change anything about herself just for Tom. God, that is so true. I know. I mean, I just finished season five and I think she gets like just kind of noticing like bits and pieces more of like her, you know, talking a lot about
her depression and her issues with body image. And like, and then it just kind of all makes sense that like with her toxic relationship to in the past, that like this has been like their relationship has been clouded because of her own stuff. And he takes advantage of that. Yeah. And when he said it's not about looks, it's like, why even bring that up? We screamed, screamed. I can't believe he even went there. How horrible. Yeah.
It's like, what are you insinuating that Raquel is like so much hotter than Ariana and it's not about that? Like, fuck you. Fuck you. I was 100% what he was trying to do to her. And clearly it's not about look. Sorry. Don't mean to like bully or whatever, but. Ariana, I have like honestly never been so sexually attracted to a woman. Oh yeah. Ariana's really got a great pull on that. She really has. There's something about her. There is.
I was just like, oh. Yeah, she's a hot little thing. Oh, yeah, she really is. I'm just like, you fucking fool. I know. I saw her over the weekend at a music festival.
You guys are like, oh, she was just like heaven. Yes. I saw her in the VIP section and I was like, I need to know who from Vanderpump Rules is going to be here. And I'm friends with her friend Logan. So like I've seen them around before. And when I ran into them, I was like, I knew you guys would be here. And she looked so fucking happy and she was in a hot pink like jumpsuit and she looked so cute and they were having a great time. Yeah.
No, I think she was just with some friends, but yeah, she's dating that hot guy now, which I am a little wary of. I have to be honest. We're all protective of her. Of course. But he seems nice. I mean, even if it's just like a fling where she's like getting laid and feels hot, that's good enough for me. Yeah. Same. That's kind of like what I hope it is. And that she has some time to breathe. She found out about this two months ago, right? Yeah. Yeah.
So like, this is going to take years for her to fully process and heal from like two months. It's like, you were still, I thought that last night after I watched what happened live, I was like, she probably went home and like, you know, like, it's just, it's not like she's feeling amazing still, even with all this attention and the love, like it still feels like shit. I know. And it's also like, it would be devastating enough if this happened like privately, like to an everyday person, but then the thought of like the weight of like
The world and America finding out it's trending on Twitter and everyone has an opinion. And obviously everyone is like team Ariana, but like the fact that just everyone's energy coming at you, whether it's good or bad, I would imagine would just be so fucking overwhelming, especially if you're someone with anxiety and depression, which I also have, I would just like retreat into a cave.
It's a lot. I can't believe it. Like how she's doing it. I know. And then to watch the scene next, where he goes over to Schwartz's house and collapses in his arms. Like we need to talk about it. The remorse he felt for Schwartz and none for Ariana was, oh my God. Disgusting. Trash. Trash.
like he was so concerned for their business. And you know, I have to admit something that's really dark about my brain. I, there was a split second where I was like, Oh, I do kind of feel bad for Schwartz. And my friend was like, no, Hannah, he knew the whole fucking time. You don't, don't be bamboozled. And I was like, you're right. You're right. Sometimes I'm like, I kind of,
juicy and then I'm like no no he's playing that like nice guy he is so evil because of that because he has no backbone and it's like well so who do you think is the more evil Tom Schwartz or Tana Ball that's a really good question I mean his wedding I honestly like
I have to remember that likable and evil or like likability does not mean that Schwartz is not evil. And, and so I think like on the surface likable, I think Schwartz has always been more likable, but I do think what's so insidious and dark about Schwartz is that he's never going to acknowledge the fucked up things that he's said and done. And that's almost scarier than someone like Sandoval, who's just like giving Disney villain at all times. Truly. He reminds me of like, is it, um,
Well, they're both like piercings. What's their name? Pain and panic. Wait, I'm literally dying laughing because so on my podcast, you know, you love us that I co-host with my friend Tyler. We did an episode where we cast the Vanderpump Rules people as Disney characters. Oh my God. And it literally came out today. And I also gave them pain and panic. I was like, I want to give Sandoval Jafar for aesthetics, but I like Jafar too much. Hannah, that is spot on. That's fine.
But that's a good point. It's like, who is the more evil one? The one that pretends not to be or the one that is so, and it might be the one that pretends. I think that they're both equally evil, honestly, and they will be ride or die forever. It's very,
Just to each other. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, Danny made a good point on everything iconic about the business and how like, he's like, we're supposed to be made to feel bad about the business. But the fact is, is like anyone who was like working on this restaurant with them knew that they were like,
getting in bed business wise with these dumb dumbs who have made a career out of being dumb dumbs on reality TV. So like, no, I'm not going to feel bad for people who consciously made that choice and invested in these you who's. That's a great point. Like you've seen them cheat on their,
disrespect women, cheat on their spouses. And that's like, Lisa was not hard enough on Sandoval. The fact that she was like, I know you're, you did a bad thing, but you're not a bad person. I'm like, I don't know. He's cheated on multiple women, multiple times.
Like I would say that's not a great person. No, absolutely not. I don't think he's ever had a girlfriend that he didn't cheat on. I agree. How long do you think he knew? Like, do you think he's known the entire time about and, and Sandoval? I do. Yeah.
I think he knew the morning after it happened because I don't think Sandoval could resist the urge to brag to Schwartz about how he banged Raquel. Because I'm sure that they were like doing locker room talk about fucking hot Raquel is, which again, like with peace and love, I don't really see it. But like, I'm sure they were just like, she's so fucking hot. And she's a lot younger. So I think there's a level of like social cachet with that too. And so I think the morning after he was like, fuck.
fuck Raquel last night. Like, I think he was so excited. That was also a great Hannibal. Wait, does he admit that he... I'm now forgetting what he said last night. He said that he knew about the one-night stand. But then he's like, but I didn't know it, like, went further than that. Yeah, I'm like, please. Sure, Jan. And, sure, Jan. And also, Sandoval was...
telling an inconsistent story on camera, even in just the finale. Like, cause he went to Schwartz's and he's like, okay, like we kissed after boys night. But then later Ariana's like, no, they fucked in her car after boys night. And I had to let him in the house. He didn't even have his keys. Is that after Charlotte died? Yes.
Like, did they put her down like that fucking day? I believe it was like either that day or like then it was within days, if not. And that is disgusting because at that point, Charlotte was like just as much as Sandoval's dog as it was Ariana's. Yeah. Yeah.
And that is, that's a whole other level of sickness. That's so true. I didn't think about that where it's like, like when I had to put my cat down last year, my fiance Jake, like was so distraught, like couldn't breathe. Like, like, cause it was like our cat together at that point, even though I'd had her for like seven years, I can't imagine like what human being with a heart is like, oh my God, we lost a family member. My girlfriend of 10 years is distraught.
distraught. I'm distraught. How do you go out and have sex with somebody under those conditions? True sociopath that, I mean, there's a chip missing there. We're both many chips, many a chip, many a chips, many a chip.
So what, what did you think about the conversation with Sandoval and Raquel and her weird lit room? Like, I hate that apartment so much. And also Graham was like jumping on shorts, but I, or Sandoval, but I think he was trying to get out of the apartment, like get me out of here. Anywhere else. Anywhere else.
Literally, it's like Graham blink twice if you're safe. Also, it's like that's a studio like they've probably fucked in front of Graham and Graham's like, I don't like what I've seen. Graham's like, get a mic on me. I have things to say. It's true. Things to say. Yeah. What did you think? What were you feeling? I think it was in contrast of that look of hatred that you were talking about that he gave Ariana. Yeah.
Next to the look he gave Raquel, which was like a fox about to like eat a small rabbit. Like it was so fucked up and scary. And like seeing them like act couple young camera, like legitimately made me sick to my stomach. And the fact that there was like absolutely no remorse. And another thing that was really dark to me was like,
When they had the Coors lights and the shots of whiskey, because I remember a specific time in my life where I was obsessed with a man and I would have drank any drink he liked just to impress him.
I said last night, she was like, it's like that time in your life where you're just like, I'm a cool girl. I'll just like do anything. So they are 40 years old. Cut it out with the Coors Light. Anything. Do something above 4% alcohol. I cannot. And she had an entire Coors Light like in her fridge when she opened it. That's all that was in there. Dark. It was just like a 12 pack of Coors Light. Dark. Probably just...
I know probably for like when he comes over. Also, like this is just some like boots on the ground. And I've said this on podcast before. So listeners, sorry if this is redundant. I saw them in the wild in Valley Village and they were drinking whiskey shots and Miller lights and he was like crying and she was like this. Like, yeah, they were together and Joe was there and one of his like bandmates was there. So are Joe and Schwartz dating?
Schwartz wasn't there, but I think so because I think Joe from I mean, she was extremely chaotic even in the brief moments I observed her. She was just like the loudest person in the room and was like doing a lot. And I was like, you're fucking annoying and like over the top. And so I feel like.
it would make sense that if she and Schwartz were already at least hooking up that now it's like, oh great. The four of them can hang out. Cause Joe doesn't give a fuck about anyone else. Like she's willing to befriend Raquel and Raquel's probably just like, cool. Someone wants to be my friend. Yeah. The whole, like, I didn't like her disposition. I mean, when she said, I love you too. Oh, Oh,
They had said that to each other before. Yeah. Okay. But like, I think he clearly was like, the look on his face was like, you weren't supposed to say that on camera. They're like, we can't kiss. Yeah. We can't. But then I'm sure Raquel was like, but I do want to talk about how like, I'm worried that like, you're going to do this to me. Yeah. So that I seem like I have a fucking brain cell. Yeah. And he was like taking her face and looking at that cut and she's like, it does hurt really bad.
She's like, yeah, she did punch me. And he's like, yeah, she just said on the phone, I fucking punched that bitch. And I'm like, you both corroborated this. Like, shut up. Like, yeah. I mean, I guess I don't think I was expecting anything better than how they acted. I mean, you go. No, no, you go, Hannah. I just, yeah. I mean, I was chilled to my core by like how she,
They seemed about the whole thing. And yeah, the fact that she said, I just can't get over how cringy and embarrassing it is that she said, I love you too. And he was like, I said, they love you. And do you think his family really does love her? Or do you think that's a lie? I haven't met. Well, yes, because she went to St. Louis. Right. Well, also Santa Claus family has not reached out to Ariana. She said on watch what happens live. And that is disgusting. Nine years together.
I can't even fucking imagine if I was his mother, I would like text her and be like, sweetie, I'm so sorry. Like, are you okay? Like literally, I'm sorry. I ever brought this thing person into the world. Also, can we talk about the, sorry, going back to the scratch on, on Rachel's eyebrow.
My sister and I got physical as children and my sister had paper thin nails and she would scratch the shit out of me. And I bring this up because I don't think an acrylic nail with a square tip is capable of digging into the skin like that. She's investigating. And I like it. I agree. It's like the acrylic has like some thickness. That's yes. Yes. Oh, and it is a square nail and it kind of like has like a little curve to it. So it's not going to go. So what do you think happened?
Look, I think these people are sick. What if Raquel just went, uh, I could see it. I know. What did she scratch herself? She just said that she pushed her, right? She said she pushed her and she like,
what's into a wall or something like that I would have loved to see it would have loved to see I know I wish I could see Sheena go full Maddie Perez on Raquel literally I'm like how much money would you pay to like have seen that like be on the street when that happened take my bank account yeah just take my first born child yeah literally like if oh man well speaking of Sheena I'm so proud
So I mean, years of her being trolled on this show. I like kind of being the butt of the joke. She's always been like, I think, beloved. But because people are like, oh, Sheena, oh, you. And to have an episode where she was truly like,
in control, powerful, strong, was such a good friend. I mean, and she looked incredible. She looked amazing. Has never looked better in her entire life. I just, I couldn't be happier for her. She said all of the right things. I know. And she really felt it. Like she was, I mean, we were talking about this last night, like,
When these kinds of things happen, like she lost three people that are family to her in like a second, like she, or three, two, two shorts, shorts too. Like all of a sudden in a blink of an eye, you're like, all these people are monsters. And I did not think that they were.
Like it sucks for their wedding photos to have Raquel and Sandoval in them. Well, she is replaced. Oh yeah. I see the photo that Lala. So good. So good. Like not even commenting about it, just doing it. Like I support that. And just, I, you know, I loved what she said where she was like, then you should have flown her mom in phone Jeremy in. And like, we would have been there.
Using the depression excuse is so fucking sick. It's so sick. What would she have done if I told like that is that man has never known struggle. No, no. And it's disgusting. Also, I do have to mention Brock has really been promoting lover boy. Every time I see him, he's wearing lover boy merch. He was wearing a lover boy t-shirt on that one. And I definitely saw some lover boy hats or something this season as well. Shit.
Sheena posted with Kyle Cook last night on her story. They're really feeling. So maybe there's a little, little something there. Well, I mean, that is how we got summer house with through Vanderpump rules. So. Oh my God. I wonder if they like invested in lover boy or something. They did. Oh my God. Isn't lover boy going through a tough time? Like, didn't he just lose a bunch of money or something? Oh shit. I've been meaning to order their espresso martinis. I want to try them. We tried them. Okay. Yeah.
Um, we also had some, I had the tea, um, lemonade and the more I drink it, the more I liked it. We got the new variety pack before the concert last weekend and some better than others. You know, it's never great, but it's good. Yeah. That's a bummer. So espresso martini wasn't, it wasn't good. Um, what is that aspartame taste? That fake sugar. Yeah.
Yeah. But I, I support them. I didn't have it over ice. Right. We had it on the beach. Yeah. I think like you put like, maybe if you put it in a martini shaker, get it super cold, it'd be a different story, but it's very sweet. Yeah. But doesn't that like defeat the purpose? You know what I mean? Like it should be good out of the can. I really wish, you know, I don't really enjoy Bethany Frankel anymore, like at all, but I would trust her to put an espresso martini in a bottle on the market and have it actually be good.
Yes, I agree with that. She, you know, she's good at what she does. Bethany's doing the most right now. On TikTok. Help her. Take her phone away. Like Brynn, Brynn, take it away. But now Brynn's loving it too. I know Brynn is really loving it. Prayers for Brynn. Prayers for Brynn. Always thinking of her. Also with the, to go back to the Sheena and Sandoval conversation. So we confirmed Miami girl, which I think we did all. No, no.
Yeah. But it's just tough to hear out loud. And it's tough to hear Ariana admit like, yes, we knew we had an agreement. I wanted to, because I think everything that she has done to protect him is to really protect her own integrity of not wanting people to think that she is weak and she is stupid and to not look like a fool. And so she's like extreme choices to make herself just look like
stronger. Yeah. And I mean, look, I think there have been moments, especially if you watch it back where Ariana was, I hate to say it given kind of pick me girl energy where it's like, I'm going to eat a steak with my hand and let the blood run down my butt. And it's kind of, it's like the NASCAR thing. I'm like, did you really, do you like NASCAR or does Sandoval like NASCAR? Like, I think a lot of the choices she made were based on like what would look hot to Sandoval and like,
I'm sure that when she was like, I will defend you and lie to everyone for you. He probably was like, that's so fucking hot. Like you're so cool. Christian would have never done that. Yes. Like he fully warmed his way into her psyche. And I do think, yeah, it has to really fucking suck now to be like, yeah, I,
gaslit a woman on national television for Sandoval who didn't give a fuck about me the whole time. Yeah. I mean, she admits that. She said I would have changed anything. So I think her whole relationship, she was just on edge of being like, does he like this? Will this make me sexier? You know? Do you think that he and Billy Lee slept together? Of course. I think so too. And it's just like,
wild. We were all rooting for you, you know, and to do that sick. Billy Lee is the host who's trans. Yes. Okay. Tess is just now meeting her. Yes. I haven't gotten there yet. When did they sleep together?
I think it was probably around season six. I was going to say, I bet it was pretty early on. Yeah. Because when Sandoval is talking to Sheena in the finale, he admits to doing, what does he admit to of how many other times he's cheated on her? He said one other time, which, okay. If you do it once, you do it a thousand. I mean, I truly do believe that. Well, and I think, was it Lala who said, this is so comfortable that you're doing it with her best friend? Yes. But you've done this.
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I loved that logic. Also, Lala looked so fucking hot with her slick back bun and like sweatsuit. Yes. Lala and I share a very similar birth chart and that is scary to me. And it's all at the same time. That's exciting. Wait. Why?
Speaking of Lala, I heard recently on Lala's podcast that Raquel, did you see the never before seen of Raquel in about to purchase the lightning bolt necklace from last week trying to be like, well, you give us a discount if we post. Oh, yeah.
And like, Oh yeah, of course. We all would do that for you. Yeah. And I, I've heard through the grapevine that she's cheap. And then I heard on Lala's podcast that she, Lala paid her a thousand dollars for maybe an hour and a half of work for the Bambi I'd bitch palette, like shoot, forgive them Lala beauty and Raquel agreed. And then later on, like, was like, you underpaid me for this.
So like Raquel is also cheap on top of everything else. Sorry. I took us off track. No, no, no. That's important information. Raquel has the energy of when you're out, um, like to a movie and someone gets you a diet Coke. And then the next day Raquel would text you being like, Hey, by the way, um, can I have MU 350? Yeah. She has that energy, which is awesome.
It's one of the toughest traits I think you can really have. Don't invite her to the birthday dinner. She's going to be like, but I didn't even eat anything. So why should I have to pay for your martinis? You do such a good Raquel. Man, I really do. Can you do a Schwartz impression?
oh like this this look more like this like it's just kind of like in the front of your mouth you said bubba no like is you you've been you've been what did he call her you've been a provocateur a lot of like it's all in like the front of the mask from a theater kid standpoint like one big big boy word like an episode you can tell he's just like oh i got that one right i'm so proud of him truly i cannot wait for a test to meet the triplets
Oh my God. I saw them at the wedding. Yeah. Well, that's what I was saying. Oh, season five. I was like, just wait for the triplets. Oh, that was a really eyeopening and scary moment on the show. Yeah, it really was Bert, Billy and Branson. Maybe I think also we just found out about the reason. Allegedly.
Are you going to take it there? Is it too dark? I think it's a little dark. Why his dad wasn't there? Or his mom? Wait, why his dad wasn't there? Yeah, why his dad didn't fly. At the wedding? Allegedly, I think on Reddit, our friend saw that they have a restraining order, right? The mom and dad, like the mom has a restraining order against the dad. Oh, shit. And it explains a lot of behavior. Yeah.
I was going to say if his dad's like toxic enough that Schwartz, his mom has a restraining order against him, then it's like, yeah, Schwartz, perhaps you should seek help. Like literally. And I think that's why he goes into like a baby voice and says, every time there's conflict around.
Wow. Oh, my God. When he in the episode came to Katie's and he's like, look at the dogs fresh out of this land. I was like, you're so fucking annoying. So shocking. I cannot. Also, his chart is. Oh, he is Libra in like every single position. And that's too much Libra. He's so conflict avoidant. Oh, shit. No, just call us Allie. Literally. How did Allie not pick up on that, though?
It will all come. Yeah. And that at one point it will, the truth will reveal itself. Sure. Well, God, I mean, so what are your, you know, what do you think is going to happen next season? Who's going to be invited back? What do you think should happen? I guess like I've seen, but I can't even, I'm scared.
I'm scared to. I mean, it's hard to say before this explosive three part reunion happens, but I think if they're smart, they will stick with the exact same cast. They're not going to fucking shake anything up. The one thing that I'm disappointed about is that.
not as much Charlie this season. And I do like Charlie is like scrappy, like unapologetically cunty energy. Yes. And she will tell it how it is, like how she told Raquel, like that is a fucked up thing to do. And I respect that. Yeah. And then like even and then yeah, I love Charlie because she can defend Raquel and have a sue and be like, what the fuck is that supposed to mean? Christina, what are you saying? And then
also be like Raquel that's shitty like yeah yeah so we need Charlie because she's a truther so I would say they shouldn't change the cast they should bring back Charlie I will say like
I think the biggest thing with all these Bravo shows is like when people aren't willing to film together and Ariana did say like, I'm never going to forgive either of them. So it's like, is the cast going to be divided? And if so, what would that show look like? Cause it's like, well, we need them in one room for the conflict to be there. So that's my biggest fear is that like, it's going to be team everyone else. And then those three losers and we're just not going to get to see them interact. Yeah.
That's a scary point. Right. Which it's like, that's fine for two episodes, but you can't do a whole season that way. Right. Ariana would give like the producers an ultimatum. Probably. But like, they'd be like, no.
But Ariana also has more opportunities than literally ever. Unfortunately, I mean, it's sad that it's because of this, but like she has more fan love than ever before. She has more like opportunity than ever before. So I could also see her being like, well, fuck, I have to find a way to like preserve my mental health. And also like the show has never been better. So like maybe I should ride this out a little. I mean, she just had to sell her house, which I think there was some financial stress there. I don't remember exactly what was going on there.
So I'm like, Ariana, get your bag. Like it'll be okay. Raquel probably, do you think she wouldn't come back? Because she is so, I mean, but she's so thirsty for fame.
Like, but she's been getting like death threats and like being followed and people being like, you know, that's scary. She's not like, well, so maybe she's like, I need more of it. I need to prove my point. I mean, she is like confirmed, like in a mental health facility right now, which for a while I thought was just for PR because she did a lot of dumb shit for PR. Um, so, but like,
So like as a human, I'm like, I mean, I think the best thing after this would be for her to retreat and just like move to like Montana and do some equine assisted therapy and like keep it moving. That would be perfect for her. Yeah. I think Raquel really does have a horse girl somewhere inside her and I would love for her to like explore that identity. Yeah.
I, I don't. Okay. So like going back to the like rumor that Raquel is, or I mean, she showed us that Raquel is cheap or like financially concerned. I could also see her being like, but what the fuck am I going to do for a living on the other side of this? So I could see her being tempted by like the financial aspect of being on the show and like, yeah, the fame. What else does she have? And I really think she thinks she can come back from this.
Like I can see her being like, I just need to go on the show and like tell my side of the story of it and show my life. Yeah. If she, if she thought she could get away with the ship for seven months, she thinks that she can get away with anything. Yeah. That's true. And she's probably like looking at someone like Stassi who got like canceled being like, well, Stassi came back and she's doing good. I could do it too. I mean, also I'm like, you don't have the like personality that Stassi has, unfortunately. And also like,
I think I had a point and I lost it, but you get what I mean. Now I know. I also, in my opinion, I don't think that they should bring Jackson Kristen back. I feel like we don't know what we're asking for if we bring that back.
you know, that anymore. I think at the time it's, it's chapter is closed. I've heard a rumor that like Jackson, Brittany, like are coming back for sure. But, but it hasn't been like publicly confirmed, but I think they're really testing the waters with that. Like Jackson, Brittany rewatch that no one fucking asked for. Yeah.
nobody wants that. No. Who talks that man has participated in is shocking. Remember how hot he was like season one before we knew what a monster he was. Oh my God. Do you remember? Yeah. We were literally like, Oh, poor guy. Like Stassi is such a monster. I'm like darked out by my own internalized misogyny at that time. It was really tough to watch first season and just be like, am I okay? Why do I feel this way? Yeah. But,
they knew what they were doing. Also, like, to be fair, like, we didn't, we only, we didn't know what we didn't know, you know? But I think, like, if Jax and Brittany come back, like, they're not going to want to show their relationship being messy either. Yeah, they have a kid. God help that child. Oh, Chris. Chris. I think they, like, like to be like, oh, we
We're now like the parents of the group. Yes. They're going to be like, we figured it out. Like we have our shit together. And I'm like, A of all, I don't think you ever really will. And B of all, if you're not willing to show like your whole ass on this show, like be gone. We don't need it. I fear for season 11. I do too. I know. I'm nervous. I feel like it's like we've reached the peak and like, I'm like, where else can we go but down? I mean, like, also I don't need to hear Brittany's shrill like, what?
Like, I don't need to hear that ever again. Right.
Rotten hell. I'm taking the dogs. Rotten hell. Yeah, I agree. But it could be fun to see them dating these people that are single now. We'll see. Yeah. The Don. I mean, I wouldn't mind if the Don came back. No, I love their relationship right now. I feel like they're just like so platonic, actually, but they have a love for each other, Lala and the Don. Do they hook up? They have hooked up. Yeah. Lala's like, I squirted everywhere. I was like, Jesus Christ.
Good for her. You know? Yeah. I hope she's happy. I do. I do too. This has been amazing.
Oh my God. I had so much fun. I literally could talk to you for three more hours. What we will be doing all day. It's true. Well, we do ask our guests one question every time. So if you could smoke a joint with anyone in history, dead or alive, who would it be? Shit. This is really hard. It can also be a Bravo. If you want to like, you know, it could be. Yeah. Whatever. Oh my God.
Can I just give you two answers for different reasons? Yes. Okay. So in the Bravo universe, I would love to smoke a joint with Kelly Clore and Ben Simone. I think the shit that would come out of her mouth would be insane. Yeah. And I would just be like, yeah, girl, totally. Yes. Great answer. And then the other celebrity is, I don't know why I,
I feel like, okay, wait, no, I just changed my answer. I was going to say Freddie Mercury, but now I have to say Billy Joel because I just want to have like an old man joint with like a sexy old man like Billy Joel. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like I just want to like get high with him and like tickle the ivies. Oh, I love that.
And perhaps Kelly could join as well. And the three of you guys could have a time that you would never be able to describe to anyone. Oh my God. Totally. That's like my, I'll know that I went to heaven if the pearly gates open and it's just Billy Joel, Kelly, Ben Simone, and like a fatty joint. If you don't mind, if we could join that circle, even if you're invited. And is there anything you want to promote or shout out? Where can we find you? Yes.
Oh my gosh. Thank you so much for having me. I had so much fun talking with you. And y'all can follow me at Hannah A. Brown on Instagram and Twitter and Hannah A. Brown Zero on TikTok. And there's a link in my bio with, you know, my LTK and all those goodies. And also I co-host a podcast with my friend Tyler Meredith called You Know You Love Us. It's a Gossip Girl recap podcast. And we also dabble in like podcasts
like pop culture and you know shenanigans so check it out we will be listening to that and yes everyone go give Hannah a follow so funny yeah we're just gonna put this out there today and you know yeah see what happens see what happens and let's go to um see you next Tuesday on June 13th we'll literally I'm adding it to my Google calendar right now I can't wait we'll uh we'll email you yes immediately
Thank you so much, Hannah. Thank you. This was so fun.