NFL Week 2, Fastest 2 Minutes, Ravens + Bengals In Trouble? Chiefs Are Inevitable + Bears Lose A SNF Stinker
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Hey, Pardon My Take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's Pardon My Take, week two of the NFL. We're going to talk about every game. We're going to do fastest two minutes. Some shockers. We had the Ravens start 0-2. The Bengals start 0-2.

We're going to talk Sunday night football. We just finished watching the whole game, so that will be at the end of everything we talk about. We're going to do Who's Back of the Week. It's a football Monday.

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Okay, let's go. A.W. Headed.

Welcome to Part of My Take, presented by DraftKings. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers to get $2.50 in bonus bets when you bet just $5 and get one month of NFL Plus Premium. Only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Monday, September 16th. Week 2. What?

We start in Dallas where there was little border control at the goal line for Alvin Kamara Harris as he scored four times on Sunday. Derek Cardi D had a wet ass pussy. And when I say pussy, I'm talking about his throwing game as the Saints put that WAP

on Bodak Prescott to the tune of 44 points. Hey, Teej, you heard this one? You hear about this one? What's that boom? Tell me about it, boom. They call him Jersey Mike McCarthy because Jerry is going to need a sub as a head coach sooner than later. He's not on a roll, boom. Saints go marching 44, Cowboys 19. What?

Up north, where Sam Darnold and the Mono Soda Vikings put the kiss of death on Kyle Shanahan. Justin Thomas Jefferson had so much free room on his 97-yard cutback touchdown, it was like the Louisiana Purchase. George Skittle said, taste the rainbow, bitch, after scoring a touchdown, leaving Harrison Booker Smith to shake his head in disgust.

The Vikings win, and the Vikings are 2-0. Huh? Huh? Huh? The Vikings? Huh? With Sam Darnold? With Sam Darnold? The Vikings are 2-0? Huh? Vikings, 23. Huh? Huh? The Niners, 17.

In Baltimore, where the Raiders were down in the fourth quarter when Gardner Minshew said, Go, go, Bauer Rangers, as he hooked up with Brock Powers in Las Vegas, morphed into an explosive offense. Daniel Carl Sun Tzu said, The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without them realizing you're a real football team. Lamar Jackson had a chance at the end with a whoop and a whoop whoop and a whoop whoop and a fumble, and the Ravens fall to 0-2. The...

Raiders 26 Ravens 23 We go up to Raljon, Maryland as an opening kickoff left the Giants with Gano Kicker to work with. Brian Dayball looked like his brain was in outer space, emerging as the worst challenger since former Washington commander Ronald Reagan's administration. Too soon, Boom? O-Rings. That's the sound the rocket made.

Austin Siebert and Ernie said seven. Seven is the number of the day as the new Washington kicker accounted for all 21 points of offense. Malik, it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Took his sweater and his shoes off and got comfortable in the secondary. But Brian from Family Guy Robinson had that dog in him. Leaving the Giants linebackers feeling very Haiti. Commies, 21. Giants, 18.

And we go to Nashville to our correspondent memes who did not delete everything off his phone memes. We go to Nashville where it was a wonderful day in Mr. Aaron Rogers neighborhood. Calvin Cambridge Ridley found a pair of touchdowns and said, make me like Mike while Tony Polaroid picture was an outcast in the second half. Will Levis Favre tried to take advantage with a Johnson being out, but Will McDonald said, I'll take a number three.

Sax, that is. Bray Lynn Allen was getting there. When you masturbate, think about my legs going back and forth and running into the endo. Jets 24, Titans 17. Thank you, memes. And then we head to New England. The keeper of the lighthouse, Henry Lockwood, was on scene. Former keeper of the lighthouse, boom. Yes, and he didn't keep anything.

Today, the keeper of the lighthouse was Malcolm Butler, who was there to keep the light and lead the Patriots celebrating the 10-year anniversary of the greatest play in Super Bowl history. Gino Jaden Smith said, Yeah, I went 33 for 44 with 327 yards and a tutty to DK Metcalf.

Breaking booze. But can we talk about the political and economic state of the world right now? Ramondre Lance-Stevenson blew through the Seahawks defense into the end zone for six to tie the game up in regulation. Jake Mike Myers was asked to kick three field goals and said, yeah, baby. He was the game winner in overtime. Patriots 20, Seattle Super Seahawks 23.

Thanks, Hank. Good job, Hank. No problem, boom. To the stadium formerly known as Burrowhead where a big man got in on the scoring as Wanya, Wanya, Wanya, Fanta, Morris caught a touchdown from Patrick Mahomes to take an early second half lead. The Bengals used a blue shell finding Ant...

Andre Yoshiva, Yoshi for short, for his second touchdown of the game. But it wouldn't be a Chiefs game if the Zebras didn't get involved as a late DPI led to Taylor Swift's favorite player, Harrison. I like big buckers and I cannot lie as the Chiefs win a thriller. 26-25. It's kind of ironic that she loves Harrison Bucker. I'm not going to say it. It's very ironic, Boom.

You're absolutely right. Out west to Denver where Tebow Nix mania has yet to set in as a rookie quarterback continued to struggle in his daddy Sean Payton's offense. J.D. Vance Joseph couldn't stop the Steelers as Darnelly Furtado Washington was a man-eater after he cooked his defender for a score. There's no luck shaming in Colorado as the Broncos used Will to make sure their number wasn't zero. Steelers 13, the Broncos 6.

Standing on the corner, Jameis Winston, Cuyahoga, such a fine sight to see. It's Deshaun, my lord, heading to Jeromeport, and Jameis running QB sneaks. No more rubdowns, he scored a touchdown. Deshaun hates PMT, but he loved Cubs.

Browns, 18. Jaguars, 13. We kind of nailed that one, T. That was good. The harmonies sound good, boom. Yeah. All right. Week two, fastest two minutes, presented by our good friends at Chevy. There's a reason we've never done a Mount Rushmore pickup trucks, and that's because, for part of my take, there's only one pickup truck, the Chevy Silverado. Why is that? Silverado is a partner, a partner you can depend on. We've all spent time driving and using the Silverado for all kinds of part of my take jobs, adventures, adventures.

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The Chevy Silverado. Okay, week two in the books. Let's talk some games, PFT. We had a 10-game slate to start the day. Too many games. Crazy. Too many games at once. Every week, I don't know if this is going to continue through the regular season, but at least...

Yeah.

I'm out there and I'm thinking like Baker Mayfield is getting sacked by like Josh Allen Hines from the Jaguars at some point. I'm like, what's going on here? I can't straighten it out. I need to get better. Yeah. We're basically watch these games and with the Tasmanian devil and there's just a cloud of dust. And then the witching hour ends are like, wait, what just happened? And actually we'll start with this game because this is the perfect encapsulation of what we're talking about. So I'm,

I'd say the theme of this week was we had some pretty big upsets and Raiders 26 Ravens 23 was the biggest in terms of point spread and it also was the biggest in terms of

As we were watching all the games, the Ravens were up 10 with like 13 minutes left. And we all thought, oh, that game's over. And then we looked up and said, wait, the Raiders are about to win this game. And now the Raiders are 1-1 and the Ravens are 0-2. Yeah, Max Crosby happened. Max Crosby happened. And then Brock Bowers got unlocked this week. As I was going to say, the Raiders, I think, are the number one team where I don't think they're good, but they have really good players because Gardner Minshew was under attack all day.

But he then also reminded himself that he has Devante Adams and Brock Bowers who are both very, very good. And...

They won a game that I think we all thought was over, and now the Ravens are sitting here 0-2, and you're like, what the fuck's going on with them? And they have Dallas, Buffalo, and Cincy coming up next three weeks. Are we sure that the Ravens are good? They might not be. Now, they did have a shitload of penalties. Again. The offensive line is not good for the Ravens right now. Ten penalties for 109 yards. Again, they were undisciplined.

Again, they played sloppy. And I do think the Ravens are always good for one or two of these games a year where they just look like they're about to win a game and then you look up and you say, what just happened? But it's significant because it's 0-2 and this is the first time the Ravens have started 0-2 since 2015, which is a long time. And now you're wondering like,

I'll read those games again. Dallas at Dallas versus Buffalo at Cincy. Yeah, it's going to be tough. It's going to be tough. They might have to be my pinky team. I think that they're probably a good pinky team to have because you know that they're going to be in contention. It's them or the Rams. You're going to be going up against the Lamar fans. It's going to be you versus Stavros. It's going to be you versus Jimmy's Seafood. It's going to be a lot of no love lost in any of those matchups. Yeah.

Shout out the Raiders, though. Shout out the Raiders. Tough win. I like that we called the Alexander Madison baby bump. Yep. We told you. We told you about that. He's been holding a baby all week. So that's better, actually, than when a coach tells you walk around holding a football all week so you can't fumble. If you're holding a baby, you got three points of contact. You're not dropping that thing. Yes. Can't hold a baby like a loaf of bread. So Madison got in. I'm also happy for Antonio Pierce because after the worst punt ever last week, I think everyone had the same thought of, are we sure he's...

Head coach material. And then to have this win on the road, eight and a half point underdogs down 10 with 12 minutes left. That's impressive. The Raiders are back to being a salty dog. Also of note, this is the first time since 1980 that for everyone who does Survivor Leagues, that the biggest favorite in week one and the biggest favorite in week two both lost.

Yeah, it's crazy. I got eliminated this week. Bengals last week against the Patriots and then the Ravens this week against the Raiders. So everyone's bracket is busted. Yeah, it's bad. It was bad for me. I'm in Matt Jones Survivor League right now and I think like half the pool got eliminated in week two.

Someone's going to win in week five. It's okay, but here's the thing. There are too many leagues that I'm in. When it comes to fantasy football, first touchdown score, other fantasy football, Survivor, there's just too many different ways that you have to compete about watching football. And I can't win them all. I'm lucky if I win one. And it's good to have this one just off the books. Yeah, so I don't even have to worry about it. That's one less text that I have to send on Thursdays every year. Exactly. So, yeah, I'm in agreement with you. It does feel like the Survivor League is...

You don't pay attention to your Survivor League picks until like week seven. That's when you have to actually start thinking about it. I know that there will be some people like, hey, I mapped this whole thing out the whole time and I'm really smart about it. Well, that's not us. No. We think about it right before kickoff on Thursday night. Yep. And then say, oh, who's the biggest –

spread. Okay, let's use them. And if you did that, you would have been out double. I think that two years in a row, not this year, because obviously I just got balanced this year, but the prior two years I was eliminated by week five for not submitting a pick. Yeah. So that's just, it's,

Honestly, good that I got eliminated this early. Yeah. I'm happy with that. But yeah, credit to the Raiders. I'm told that Antonio Pierce does have an analytics guy that tells him what to do. And Antonio Pierce just said, no, I'm going to go with my gut in week one. It was Deuce Gruden. It was not Deuce Gruden. That would be a great analytics guy. Just like pick up heavier stuff. We were converting everything to kilograms. Yeah. I have a question for you, PFT. Derek Henry. So he started very slow. Yep. He was good in the second half. Yep.

But is that an issue for the Ravens in the fact that if you have Derrick Henry, the only way that you can effectively use Derrick Henry is that you have to keep running Derrick Henry. So you can have moments where you're like, hey, this isn't working, but we have to go through the wall and

And running him in order to get the effective Derrick Henry. And he's clearly not the same as he was three or four years ago. No running back is. He does look better in the Ravens outfit, though. Those colors look awesome on Derrick Henry. He also had a nasty, nasty old school Derrick Henry stiff arm that rocked. But...

Is that, are you too beholden to Derrick Henry when you know that the only way to use him correctly is you just have to keep going even if it's not working? See, I think that's exactly why they got him. Because the knock against the Ravens last year in the playoffs was they abandoned the run. So by having Derrick Henry on your team, it's almost forcing you, like, hey, remember, you have to keep running the football because if you don't, there's no use in having Derrick Henry on your team. I was just thinking about it because, and I think the Ravens are going to end up being a playoff team, right?

That's why I kind of don't want to make my pinky team. Just a reminder, my pinky team is a team that has Super Bowl aspirations, starts 0-2. I say I'll cut off the tip of my pinky if they win the Super Bowl. Contrary to popular belief, I think people think that I'm trying to do it to pick a team that I still think can win the Super Bowl. I'm doing it because I think this team cannot win the Super Bowl.

And I think the Ravens could still win the Super Bowl. So that's why, like, being true to myself, I can't really pick them. But I was thinking about it just because. Some people will call you a coward for that. No, because the whole thing started with crossing a team off and saying they cannot win the Super Bowl. Why would I pick them if I still think they can win the Super Bowl? You won't.

Right. You won't do it. I see what's happening here. I'm going to go back to the Derrick Henry talk. You're not going to do it. I was thinking about it because the Titans, their identity was Derrick Henry. Yeah. The Ravens have more guys than the Titans did. Yeah. So is there...

This is a dumb thought. I might be wrong. I know what you're saying because they have to spread the ball around. They can't rely on just being like Derrick Henry focused offense because they've got Lamar Jackson, who's also great at running the football. Zay Flowers is very good. They've got Zay Flowers, Isaiah Likely, and Mark Andrews. They've got good players on offense, and their offense has been good not having to just run the ball down your throat the entire time. They do more interesting stuff with their running game than the Titans did, which was Titans would just, here, Derrick Henry, you take it. Tractor Seto sees.

Yeah, and he wasn't the problem today because, like I said, he did play well in the second half and got it going. It was just a thought. Yeah, no, I don't think it's a terrible thought to have. I think that the Ravens have got a lot of issues, but I wouldn't look too heavily into Derrick Henry being a deep problem with the team just yet. But he might not be the same Derrick Henry that we've seen in the past. I think that's fair to say. It just sucks when he starts slow, and it's like I think he had like seven carries for four yards to start the game, but that's kind of how it goes with him. I have a question for you, Big Cat. Yeah.

is justin tucker washed yes he is washed compared to peak justin tucker 100 yes he's no longer justin tucker he's no longer hey we have a 50 yard field goal we're gonna make it because we have justin tucker yeah he got out kicked today yeah this is actually a tucker carlson game there are also like two or three kickers that you could say off the top of your head that are better than him here's some bucker aubrey for from the cowboys is better yep uh

McPherson might be. I don't know. Missed an extra point today. Yeah. I know what you're saying. Justin Tucker, he used to be automatic. This is crazy to say. This is an insane statement to make. He used to be automatic from 60 and in. Yeah. And he was. It was never a problem. Never a problem for him. Yeah. And he did miss. What did he miss? A 50-yarder? Yeah. I think it was another bomb today. So don't get me wrong. I would love to have Justin Tucker. Well, actually, no, I wouldn't. My kicker didn't miss a field goal today.

Yeah, that's the thing that sucks for Justin Tucker is that we just compare him to old Justin Tucker. So it's not that he sucks. He's still a very good kicker. We expect him to make every single kick no matter what, and now he's missed a few 50-yarders.

like oh well he's kind of washed yeah he's still still better than you know 90 of the kickers this might be a hardball problem hardball maybe hasn't realized that if he just uses justin tucker like a regular kicker then he's going to be one of the best kickers in the league yeah by the way we still don't have a team that's lost to two harbor brothers back to back that is true according to our research and john hardball is now one and one against brothers this year yeah yeah exactly uh okay um

Bucks-Lions. Bucks 20, Lions 16. That was my gutsy win of the week by the Bucks. Gutsy, gutsy win. Because that was a Baker-Mayfield win. They had a ton of injuries on secondary. They had Vida Vey went out halfway through the game. They got offensive line issues.

They just found a way to win that game. And we'll talk about the Lions in a sec, but I want to give props to Baker, who I just love watching and rooting for. He got sacked three times in the first quarter by Aiden Hutchinson. Most guys would be like, fuck this, I'm out. And he was just big play after big play. That QB draw for the go-ahead touchdown. It was the second team since 1970 to...

to win despite being outgamed by 200 plus yards and having a minus five sack differential. I don't know how many times that's happened, but on paper, that's a bad game if you get outgamed by 200 and you have a minus five sack differential. It's very hard to win those games without the other team straight up giving you those games.

And the Lions did make a couple mistakes. But the Bucs, you're right about Baker. Like, when he runs with the football, we forget that Baker's sneaky elusive. Yes. Like, not only is he tough, not only is he going to put his head down and try to run you over, but Baker in the open field, he will make a guy miss every time. Yeah. He's so fun to watch. I think it's because he carries the ball with almost a straight arm down at his legs. Right. As he's juking you out. Right. A lot of other players will tuck it up and run, but he's got the ball dangling out there, too. Yeah.

almost distracting you with it. Gives you the dead leg, steps around you. And yeah, the Bucs, you called it the gutsy win of the week? Yeah, the gutsy win of the week. I think this might be Todd Bull's signature win.

Yeah, he won a playoff game. He won a playoff game. He won a playoff game. But I'm going to give Todd Bowles his signature win this week. Okay, signature win. This is a signature win for Todd Bowles. We've all been waiting for one. It was like they shouldn't have won that game if you just look at the box score and the Lions were able to move the ball and then they just stalled in the red zone. I think they were one for seven in the red zone. And the big issue, there were two big issues for the Lions. Jared didn't play well and Dan Campbell cost him. At the end of the first half. And...

I don't even know what was happening at the end of the game when they didn't take any shots to the end zone. Yeah, that was weird too. That was very strange. Dan Campbell...

I love that he's – I think he's so disgusted with himself that he can't say the word I. So after the game, he said in the press conference, I asked for improvement. I guess he said I there. I asked for improvement from last week. We did improve. Their coach cost them. Their head coach cost them this one. I like that. He's making himself either a fan or a member of the media. Yeah.

It's like a disassociation of their head coach cost them this one. I like that a lot. I like that a lot. That's a really powerful way of taking accountability. That's way better than saying we. Yeah, exactly. It's way better than saying we. And Dan Campbell did cost them a game. He did a classic Dan Campbell where he ended up doing a fake punt out of the end zone that worked.

But he also punted, I think, with like 10, 13 minutes left from the 41, which was a little weird. I think it was a fourth and seven. But still, I don't know. Dan Campbell was kind of all over the place. I think Dan Campbell is the league leader for the last three seasons of people saying, if that doesn't work out, that's a fireball offense. Yeah. After it worked out. Yeah. You know, somehow it usually works out for Dan. But the end of the first half, they were in complete disarray. They were trying to get the field goal unit onto the field. Yeah.

at the same time as the offense was running a play. Yeah. So I think they ended up having like 20 guys on the field. 25 men on the field. 25. That's slightly too many men on the field at any given time. And, yeah, their coach really sold them short on that one. Yeah. So Dan Campbell, not a good job there. Well, no, Dan Campbell's fine. It's their head coach. Whoever their head coach happened to be in that situation. Their head coach, yeah, fuck that up.

Yeah, but I guess you could say the Bucs have now beaten two outstanding teams. Yeah. I think I have the Bucs number one in my power rankings right now. Yeah, there you go. So that's good. Commanders and the Lions. Commanders and the Lions. And also, if you're a Lions fan...

Just remind yourself that last year you won week one, and then you lost week two. That's a good reminder. You lost to the Seahawks at home week two last year. So this has happened before, and your team turned out fine. And you improved. Yes. Because Dan Campbell said you improved. It's just that their head coach did that to you. Their head coach did it to him. Their head coach screwed that one. Yep. Yeah.

Also, this is why you can't do the commercials because then people were clowning on the Applebee's commercial after that first half, end of first half. You just gave it to people. But that's their head coach. That's their head coach. That's not Dan Campbell. That's their actor. Yeah, that's their actor. That's their actor who's different from their head coach. Who just plays a coach on TV. Yeah, their actor did a great job. Yeah. Okay. Next up, I had Saints-Cowboys. Saints 44, Cowboys 19. PFT, here's my question for you.

If we were just going off of two weeks, are the Saints the best team in the NFL? Yes. They are. Second best. I think they are the best team in the NFL if you go off two weeks. I think that the entire NFC South is a lot better than we thought it was going to be. Yeah, I'd agree with that. But the Saints are... So their cumulative scores are 91 to 20. They have not...

Had a second where they've been trailing in the first two games. Yep. Their defense is nasty. Derek Carr, 11-year bump, looks awesome. Alvin Kamara looks like old school Alvin Kamara. He had 180 yards and four touchdowns. And their offensive line looked really good today. Yes. They kept them. So not only that, but Derek Carr, first 15 drives of the season, the Saints scored points. Now, they took him out of the game against the Panthers and they punted twice, but

The next closest, next best was the 2000 Falcons started their season with seven straight drive scoring points. Fifteen straight drive scoring points for the Saints.

If you had to do a BCS poll, the Saints would be number one. Yeah, I mean, they have looked unstoppable. And it's not the Panthers that they're playing against. The Cowboys and their defensive line is supposed to be really, really good. We saw week one that they can play really well. And the big question was going to be for the offensive line. They held up really well today. And so if you add that in to what they're doing with their offense with Rashid Shahid and Alvin Kamara just getting open all the time. Looking like old school. Old school Alvin Kamara. Yeah.

It's tough to imagine a team that you would put ahead of them besides the Buccaneers. Yeah. Hank, as a Cowboys fan, did you see the – now, I don't really believe it, but it was still funny to think it might be real. Someone tweeted out that a Cowboys fan – Jono Barnes tweeted out, a Cowboys fan just airdropped this to my entire section. If we don't fire Mike McCarthy, I'm beating the fuck out of everybody here.

Don't think it's real, but still kind of funny. Just to imagine that a Cowboys fan... I mean, you're a Cowboys fan. That's kind of what you guys get angry about. Yeah, I mean, I kind of gave up my fandom last year after the playoffs. We talked about it, but I think you got to have the conversation. Yeah. Well, this was, in a weird way, spin zone for Cowboys fans. This felt like a playoff loss because usually when the Cowboys get to the playoffs, they have a game where Dak maybe...

like on paper isn't like the main problem but their defense gets bullied and if you watch the game you're like oh yeah Dak he didn't play so so bad but he also missed some guys and they they're uh often stalled in the red zone yeah he didn't play bad I'll agree with you but there was one interception that he had yes was like that's what we're waiting for that that that press guy and they're often stalled in the red zone which is exactly what happened last year and then their defense which was good last year got bullied against the Packers and so maybe now you just

have this conversation right now about Mike McCarthy. But I guess Jerry Jones already settled this by just turning up the heat. Yeah, he's all in. Jerry Jones is all in right now. He's not going to get rid of Mike McCarthy. He's settled in with Dak. He's settled in with Seedy. I feel like this is Jerry Jones just nesting.

It's nesting for his imminent demise. Yeah. So he's just like, I want to keep the guys around me that I'm going to have for the rest of my life. We're going to get to know each other. We're going to be a family. So, yeah, I don't know if Mike McCarthy is going to go anywhere unless they do something crazy this year. I've been thinking that he would for the last two seasons, but now I'm falling more into the camp of Jerry Jones. He just wants people that are going to be around. Well, we talked about it in one of our preseason interviews with someone. Like, Jerry Jones, the –

The 90s Jerry Jones, we still think that's the guy. Jerry Jones is too loyal to his coaches. He kept Jason Garrett for way too long. So I think he's going to probably just keep Mike McCarthy for way too long. Yeah, he probably will. Some might argue he already has. Yeah, that's true. I have a fun fact. Did you know that Derek Carr's middle name is literally Dallas?

Oh, I didn't. Yeah. That's awesome. I guess he grew up, his parents and grandparents were Cowboys fans. He's DDC? He's DDC. That's badass. And he looks cool. I think Derek Carr got cool this year. Yeah, he came on PMT. He came on PMT. He scored a touchdown, did a Michael Jackson end zone celebration. Yep. He grabbed his crotch, which I never would have imagined that Derek Carr would do. Yeah, kids are watching. Kids are watching at home, Derek. I hope you apologize for that. But yeah, he looks cool. He looks fun to watch. He's throwing the ball deep. He's...

I mean, he's taking what the defense gives him, but having Rashid Shahid out there, when he uncorks one, it looks good. Yeah. It looks exciting. Rashid Shahid is top guy's name to say. Great name to say. Great name to say. Now, Big Cat, I have a question for you. Yeah. Do you think that the Cowboys are frauds?

No, because they have... Who'd they play week one? Browns? They beat the Browns week one. No, I don't think they're frauds yet. I think they're to be determined. Because you have to be... You have to have a good record...

And win games decisively to be certified. I don't think you can call anyone a fraud week two. I think you need a little bit of a body of work. You need a month and a half where it's like, oh, we're four and two. And the four wins were by 20 plus. And the two losses were against good teams. Yeah, those are the fraud teams. So I don't think they're frauds yet.

I just think, I don't know if they're good. I think this loss today might be submitted as evidence down the line for them being frauds. Yeah. So I don't think we can call them frauds either, but I do think that this would be a big bulletin point if we reach that point where they're four and two. Yeah, I'd agree with that. I'm happy for Saints fans because it does feel like they've been, since Drew Brees kind of just going in circles, every year you hear about them being in cap hell,

They kind of run it back. Dennis Allen is the most forgettable coach in the NFL, but credit to him, he did hire Clint Kubiak, who's done a really good job through two games. But it feels like the Saints are a fun team, and...

Like I said, their defense is playing nasty too. So it's not just their offense has been lights out. They've been both sides of the ball. So I'm happy for Saints fans. It's cool to have an identity besides we're going to let Taysom Hill run through linebackers' faces. Right. And so that's a nice piece to have. Right. That's a great piece to have. But you don't want that to be your thing as an offense. Yeah, your only thing. Yeah. And the thing that you have to hope works every single time. And then once a year when he gets hurt, you're like, well, this is going to suck. Yeah, now what do we do? Yeah. Yeah.

So, yeah, I mean, good for the Saints. Yep. Happy for the Saints. All right, you want to go to the next game? Yeah, let's do it. Commanders have won. Commanders are 1-1. Commanders 21, Giants 18. I told you at the end of the game, it was actually very mean what you did to the Giants because they had Graham Gonneau who got hurt on the opening kickoff. So the Giants didn't play with a kicker, which I love games when a kicker's injured because you just don't know what's going to happen.

And then the commanders basically went out and said, hey, you don't have a kicker. We're going to kick seven field goals right in your face. Right in your face. We got all the field goals on our side. Yes. Seven field goals. Now, I will say...

The offense was pretty good today outside of what we did in the red zone, which was just take penalty after penalty until it backed us up a little bit. Then we couldn't actually score a touchdown. I'd like to see touchdowns, but in a weird way, I like winning a game like this because it's been so long since we've had a fuel goal kicker who's capable of making three fuel goals in a game, much less four, much less five, six or seven fuel goals. So having a guy that is that competent is a really good thing for our team and

And this is a crazy stat. This is actually insane. Austin Seabrook, our kicker right now. Okay. He is our fifth kicker in the year 2024. Your fifth kicker. It's week two. Oh, yeah, because you got rid of Cade York. We got rid of Cade York. And I count that as a front office win for us. Yes. It's a front office win because we cut Cade York after one game, which we would never do in the past. Right. And...

We got a guy that can make seven of seven. And I think we also saved on whatever compensation we owed the Browns for making that trade because we cut him after one game as opposed to two games. Right. So the fact that we were competent enough to address a problem and then bring in a solution to that problem, that's what you want to see out of your front office. Yeah. So I have no problem with how the offense looked today. I thought we played pretty well. Brian Robinson, he's our first –

I think he's our first 100-yard running back in like a season and a half, which is also surprising to say. Yeah. But he looked good today. He looked really good. Jaden Daniels looked like he was – because Dan Quinn said it in the middle of the week that they were going to try not to run him as much. Yeah. And it looked like he was doing a better job of like –

hey, I'm not going to just run right away. Yeah, and he got the ball downfield better than he did in week one. Yeah. He looked good as a quarterback. I was very encouraged with how the offense moved the ball for the most part. Our defense still stinks, but that's fine. Our defense is probably going to stink. Yeah. And that's okay. We benefited very much from the Giants having to run fourth down plays whenever they cross midfield. Well, it's funny you say it that way because they didn't have to do that.

So Brian Dable's going to be under a lot of fire in New York this week because Graham Ganoe hurt his hamstring on the opening kickoff. He had a groin injury on Saturday. So he was already like, hey, something's a little off. The Giants went into this game with 52 guys on the roster. Yeah.

Could have gotten a kicker. Could have gotten a kicker. They have a backup kicker. They could have had, and they didn't, knowing that Graham Gonneau had a groin injury, and they went into this game being like, he'll be fine. Got hurt on the opening kickoff.

Brian Dibble, what the fuck are you doing? That's not great. It's not great at all. Florio, by the way, was the one who was on this, obviously. He was all over. I guess they put Gunnar Olchefsky on IR on Thursday, which made it go from 53 to 52. So they could have brought up a kicker. Now, this is crazy, but there's another Michael Florio that covers the NFL.

Stolen Valor. His name is Michael B. Florio. Oh, like Michael B. Jordan? I think so. That's kind of cool. And memes. How has this guy not made your top Florios list? His name is literally Florio. I think it's Michael F. Florio. Michael F. Florio. Okay, so yeah, it is. It's like that version of the Michael B. Jordan, but-

Yeah, Memes, how come this guy hasn't even crossed your radar? I've seen him on Twitter one time, and then I saw that same clip from Dan Patrick this weekend. That guy's very mad that Michael Florio is also named Michael Florio. Yeah. Wait.

Michael F. Florio is mad that our Mike Florio is named Mike Florio? Our Mike Florio is mad. No, no, no. Big Cat's right. That other guy is also mad that Michael Florio is Michael Florio. Well, fuck the fake Michael Florio. What gives you the right, dude? I would understand if our Mike Florio was mad about the other Mike Florio. Yeah. But the other Mike Florio being like, that's my name? No, no, no. That's not your name. Change your name, dude. No, it does piss me off. I kind of agree with him. Mike walks around calling himself PFT all the time. Yeah.

We got to stand up for our guy. Yeah, no, I stand with Mike Florio. Yeah, not F. In the Mike Florio versus Mike Florio debate. Yeah, we do not stand with Mike F. Florio. They should do a radio show together called Mike and Mike. That would be fun. Yeah, it'd be very fun. Florio on Florio. Florio on Florio. That literally memes hell. Yeah.

His constant Florio's dropping out of the woodwork. Florio interviewing Florio. So Brian Dable, yeah, he deserves a lot of blame for that. He also deserves a lot of blame. He might be the worst challenger coach. Yeah. He's a very bad challenger. He does what Belichick did a lot in his later days, the frustration challenge where you're not

really challenging anything other than you're upset with how the game's going you're you're challenging reality yeah you're you're challenging that you basically are a like seven-year-old turning off the console you're throwing a flag we're not playing this game anymore you're throwing a flag and you're saying nah yeah and it's yes huh restart it no it happened you you're like hey let's restart ball up top yeah restart zero zero two bad challenges by table today

And Danny Jones didn't play terrible. No, he didn't. I think we told you that on Friday, which is Daniel Jones typically plays better against the Commanders. And Malik Nabors is good. Really good. Yes. So he did have that one drop at the end of the game that kind of cost you, but he's not the reason why he lost. No. Malik Nabors is good. And, I mean, if they had a kicker, they probably would have won this game. Maybe. I mean, they had to go for it on fourth down. They missed an extra point. And they didn't get the two-point conversions. So...

It felt like Brian Dable cost his team the game here by not having a kicker. He might have. Yeah. Did you see Jayden Daniels' handoff today, though? Yeah, it was pretty sick. He had the best handoff of the week. It was pretty sick. It was sick. He stopped, froze, turned around. It looked like a dance move. That's awesome. He's so good at handing the ball off. He is good at handing the ball off. And he's very good at playing quarterback, too. Yeah. Max, you got anything to say? Did you watch the game? No. I was flying back. Oh.

Wedding Max. But on another plane, Daniels, that's a win. That's a win. That's a win. One in one. I love bragging about how good my quarterback is at handing the ball off. It was a great handoff. See, you just told yourself because you said you didn't watch the game, so you didn't see the handoff. You have no idea. It was the handoff. I think I'm so happy for you to have to see it. No, it was so sick, though. Yeah. Pull it up. Watch the clip. Best handoff I've ever seen.

It's so smooth. I'm so happy for you to have a quarterback that's good at handing it off. Yeah. So am I. No, the best handoff ever was the one. I'll give you second best handoff. The best handoff ever was when, oh, I guess it wasn't a handoff because when Jared Goff did the fake handoff and got sacked.

Or no, no, sorry. He handed the ball off and he did it so well that the defensive end sacked him and they're like, that's roughing. He doesn't have the ball right now. I think it's hard to compare those two handoffs because one was he did such a great job of the play action and this was just so cool. No, but it wasn't play action. I was wrong. He did hand it off and he didn't have the ball and he did such a good job of pretending he had the ball that they sacked him and then called a roughing the passer. Got it. Yeah, that was one of the coolest handoffs ever.

Nobody's talking about this handoff. It was so good. If it's this sick of a handoff, it shouldn't be this hard to find. The All-22 is going to come out. The Gambling Cave was talking about it. The All-22 is going to come out, and you're going to be like, God damn, I wish my quarterback was here. Who's the one who brought it up in the Gambling Cave? BFT. Oh, okay. He shouted it.

That's true. It was a great handoff. I think how it went down is he shouted it, and then no one responded. Then he shouted it again. And then everyone's like, yeah. Although, yeah, I guarantee out of all of the games in the 1 o'clock slate, everyone was watching Giants Commanders. He had eyes on it. Great sarcasm there, Max. Great use of sarcasm. That came us a rock. Go get on another plane, Max.

Yeah, have another wedding. Mr. Popular, all your friends. I got one more. One more of the season. 737 Max. I got a bye week this week, and then I have the finale. Finish strong. Rest up. Yep. All right. You can watch the game. Yeah, you won a game, PFT. Won a game. It feels good to be one and one. Who do you have next week? That's actually a great question that I should know the answer to. I know the answer. It's 0-2 Bengals. Oh, of course. Yeah, I'm going to that game. Yeah.

I was so laser focused. Bengals are going to be angry. I was laser focused on this game. I wasn't looking ahead at all. The Bengals are going to be angry. Is that Monday night? It's a Monday night game. I'm going to be in Cincinnati. Yeah. Get some chili. Hank, you want to talk about your game? Yeah. Seahawks 23, Patriots 20. We almost had Hank almost all in. We were an overtime away from having Hank almost all in. That's how close we were. You wouldn't have been all in, but you would have been almost all in. And we were almost there.

If the Patriots had won, the Jets had lost, I would have been all the way all in. All the way all in. So you were... But... But that didn't happen. So now where do we stand? Kind of the same as last week. Almost. You're still almost all in. I want to beat the Jets. We talked about it last week. If you beat the Jets, will you be all in? We'll be back to almost all in. Back to almost all in. So you can't get all in by just beating the Jets? No. Okay. Got it. You're almost, almost all in. It's an exciting team to watch. It's way more exciting than I was expecting. Is it? Yeah. Yeah.

I think you should start Drake May. Why? Maybe not this week on a Thursday. I thought Jacoby played really well. Did he? Yeah. He did okay. He was elusive. He was quick on his feet. I got a stat for you. Made some plays. I got a stat for you. Listen. You always have a stat. I have a stat for you.

Jacoby Brissett, let me get his final stat line. He was getting the offensive line. Yeah, no, your offensive line is not good. So why would you start a rookie QB with a bad offensive line? So here's the thing with Jacoby Brissett. He's a good backup quarterback. I don't know if he's a starter. He doesn't really push the ball downfield, so to speak. Jacoby Brissett was 15 for 27, 149 yards, and a touchdown, no interception. He doesn't make mistakes.

How many completions and for how many yards did he have to wide receivers, which are usually the guys quarterbacks throw it to? Well, I know how many yards Hunter Henry had. He had a lot. So I'm going to go with seven for 40. Jacoby Bursette had three completions for 19 yards to wide receivers today. That's why I was saying start Drake. Again, not this week, but Jacoby Bursette is a really good backup.

If you want – and your wide receivers aren't, like, out of this world good. But if you want to push the ball downfield and give your team chances like that – You also need time in the pocket. True. True. Good point. Good counterpoint. Thank you. Three for –

19 yards is tough. So some quarterbacks are just, they're meant to be backup quarterbacks, and that's Jacoby Brissett. He has a hard time flipping the switch over into starter mode because he's still playing like, the way that he played today would be a perfect backup quarterback spot start game. Yeah, like don't lose us the game. He's a big don't lose us the game guy. Which, I guess if that's, I guess it's a question of whether you go all in or not. If you go all in, it should be Drake May. That's my point. If it's Tank, then Jacoby Brissett's perfect.

That make sense? Yeah. I think that's fair. Hank, let me ask you this. And I think it's still up in the air. If at the start of the year you had been told you're going to be 1-1 through two games, would you take it? Yeah. Yeah. Would you have rathered 0-2? No. Okay. I would have rathered 2-0. Yeah.

Because you won the first one. Because we won the first one. They went for it on fourth and, or they punted on fourth and one. It was, they were on like their own 40, 45 area in overtime. I feel like they should have just went for it and tried to win the game. That was stupid because then it's just all the other team has to do is kick a field goal. That would be my only note, uh,

from the game. If you're going to be in overtime, just go for the win. Yeah. How do you feel about Malcolm Butler being the next man to touch the bell after you? I thought he did a great job. It's crazy. It's been 10 years. Yeah. Led the team onto the field. Picked a good game to do it too. Yeah. Hank, I actually want to give you credit. I think you're dealing with this Patriots season the correct way because you've never really been in this spot where it is a hard dance to do where

You don't want to tank right away because then it's like, fuck, this sucks. We're tanking from game one. That's stupid. You have something to believe. But you also don't want to go all in and then end up with five or six wins and not a good draft pick. So you're in that middle ground right now where you got to feel it out and figure out which way you want to go. And I was expecting us to look like the Broncos or the Steelers where it's just ugly games, not a lot of points, not a lot happening. Steelers are 2-0.

But they're just ugly games to watch. But they're 2-0. They're 2-0. All right, Broncos maybe, Commanders maybe. We're 1-1. I know, but I'm saying the games are not fun to watch. The Commanders' offense was good today. You guys didn't score a touchdown. You kicked 1,000 field goals. I'm trying so hard to find this handoff. It's literally nowhere on the internet. Max, I guarantee you I am the only person online that cares about this handoff. Hank, honestly, I'm going to get it for you on the all-22 and watch it there. Hank, can I tell you something that would maybe be fun? Mm-hmm.

your number three overall pick, Drake May. That would be fun. No, I'm saying we've been having fun. I've been having fun. I was expecting not fun. I've been entertained and had fun in both games. Got it. Oh, that's good. Then that's all that matters. You're having fun? That's really what you want. Yeah. I mean, you almost won that game. Yeah. You should have won that game. There was a bad defensive pass interference call that I think...

Tyler Lockett even told whoever your defensive back is, like, that actually was not a penalty. Like, on the field, he said it to him. So you can just say the refs. And they just had that one, you know, brain fart on the DK Metcalf touchdown. Yeah, he was wide open. And credit to, that's not Pat the Patriot. It's one of the live-action Patriots that stand in the end zone and shoot a gun when you score a touchdown. Are they the Minutemen? I think so. Okay, so one of the Minutemen, when DK scored his touchdown, DK almost ran up to him like he was going to use him for a prop.

And the guy just turned around and was like, I'm not even going to look at you. Way to hold the line. Yeah. Fend the wall. Great discipline. Fend the wall. Yeah, your defense is good. I mean, Christian Gonzalez is incredible. He did a very good job against DK Metcalf. I know DK had a big day, but a lot of it was not. It was mostly just that one play. And it wasn't against Christian Gonzalez. Right. I don't know. I just, for your sake, I...

You should start Drake May. It's fun when you have a new toy. Yeah. And Jacoby Reset, again, very nice guy. Like him. Want to have him on the show someday. He was getting smoked. Our offensive line is so bad. Yeah. Like he had no time. I know the wide receiver thing, but he also had no time to throw. If you throw in a rookie quarterback...

The risk just goes through the roof. He did have a really fucked up hand, too. Did you see that? Yeah, they showed his arm at the end of the game. He had, like, I don't know if it was turf burns. Yeah, he looked like a flesh wound. Yeah, it looked like the start of the zombie disease at This Is Us. Yeah. By the way, we have an update on the handoff. Rashad White takes a handoff from Jayden Daniels and gets into the end zone for the nine-yard touchdown. 21-10 ASU with 45 seconds remaining in the third. I don't think that's from this year. That's two teams ago. That might not be from this year. Yeah.

I mean, I told you I was going deep trying to find this handoff. Well, it sounds like that was a great handoff, too. It sounds like there's a lot of tape on there, and scouts are buzzing about how good he is. Oh, no. Jaden Daniels' handoff to A.J. Carter never seemed to be secured, and it's a lost fumble on ASU's first play at its own 13-yard line. So that's a bad start. A.J. Carter wasn't ready for it. That's from December 31, 2019. A.J. Carter has fumble-itis. Everybody knows that.

You guys are going to, whatever. Listen, I said it was a great handoff. I'm not going to back down from that. I said it was good. It looked like he was doing a dance move. It was sick. I did. So there was a point in the afternoon games where I just like asked around the room. What do you guys think about Jaden Daniels? Because I feel like he's played well. I just need to have other people say it. Yeah, it might be some. I thought he played well. I thought he played well today. Yeah. And his chin strap was buckled. I thought he played well. By the way, Seahawks might be good.

I think they are. I mean, they're 2-0. Yeah, they're 2-0. I guess the Broncos and Patriots maybe aren't the best test. They play the Dolphins. Broncos almost, I mean, Patriots almost beat the Chiefs. What? Essentially. Oh, yeah, that's true. We should have beat the Chiefs. You basically beat the Chiefs. Well, the Ravens. If you played the Chiefs in a seven-game series, that's going seven. Maybe not. It might be 4-0 sweep. Patriots. The Ravens almost beat the Chiefs, but then the Ravens lost to the Raiders. So did the Raiders almost beat the Chiefs?

Yeah. So the Patriots and the Raiders are two of the best teams in the NFL. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. I mean, the Patriots beat the Bengals soundly and the Bengals only lost by one to the or two to the Chiefs. That's that's huge. I know that's huge. So you're not thinking the office yet? No. Okay. Smart. What do you think about Jerry O'Connell's video?

I love that he's back in his bing bong voice. Did you see the video? I did see it. Okay, let's play it for the people. I'm going to find it. Or you want to pull it up, Max? You pull it up. What did you think? I saw that he did it. I didn't watch it. Oh, you didn't? Why not? So to set the scene for anyone who's listening on the podcast, Jerry's out what looks like some kind of hike with...

Four dogs? Four dogs, shirtless. Great dogs. And he's got the arm weights on, the two and a half pound arm weights. It's going to be something about... No, no. Blowing it. I don't know what his obsession with me is. He likes you.

bong hanky look at me i'm outside i'm doing my exercises i'm not inside of a golf simulator my beautiful dogs all of them you got yoffs on the mind you think your pats are gonna beat seattle today i don't think so i'm taking seattle plus the under because your team can't score bing bong get outside hanky you blew it then it cut off

I mean, he's just talking shit. Just guys. It's just smack talking. But Jerry's actually the most half of this show is just an obsession with you. PFT and this desk has an obsession with you. Yeah. Don't get just let me live. Yeah. So, I mean, he's just he's falling in line with the obsession with you to the under hit. No, no, no. And the Seahawks also didn't cover. I think I think it ended up going to three or it was three a kick. So he pushed. So, oh, one and one for Jerry. I got my three and a half. Yeah. Um,

All right. Well, good job, Hank. Thanks. Just being... Just existing. That's my first good job existing. Yeah. So thank you. Do you want to quickly just talk about the Apple Cup real quick? I know we talk college football on Wednesdays. Yeah. I mean, that was brutal. I didn't sleep last night. And then I woke up this morning and saw the news that they lost. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Rivalry game. It's always tough. When did you find out they lost it?

I saw that they lost last night. I didn't see the play until today. Yeah, so we texted you right away. I texted you the minute the play happened. I said, sorry, Hank. And PFT was like, he doesn't even know what.

We're sorry for, and no, he said, I can't, I can't wait to see Hank's Google text or Google search to figure out why he's upset right now. Like, Hey Hank, when you see that, we're sorry for you and you have to find out why, what does that Google search? It will go through your head. I honestly didn't even, my phone was dead. And like, by the time I turned it on, I had like those messages got lost in the, in the flood. Got it. Got it. So I didn't even see the apologies.

So you weren't, your phone was dead. Were you not, were you watching Kent State, Tennessee? Nope. Just living your life. Living my life. And the Apple Cup, that's brutal. Because that one meant more. Yeah, it did. And we were right there at the goal line at the end. I know. Because you can't chant Mountain West at Wazoo anymore. Yeah. Can't make fun of them for their non-conference. Are you still confident in the coach? Yeah. And his name is what? How do you think their quarterback played, Hank? I don't know.

You got the coach's name. I don't. Jed? Hoyer. No. Jed Fish. Jed Fish. Came from Arizona. That's an easy one. Yeah. You got that now. We're going to quiz you next week. Okay. This is tough. I know how much that Apple Cup meant to you.

I know. Like I said, it was seeing the play. I couldn't even bring myself to watch the play until today. Yeah. And Tyler Van Dyke got hurt. Have you? That's brutal. Have you watched the play? I did. You saw the play? Yeah. What happened on it? They ran to the right and got stuffed. Yep. He saw it. Confirmed he saw it. Was there any pitch back or what kind of play was it? It's a run play. I don't think you watched the play. You watched the play. It's an option play. You watched the play.

Option play. That is a run. I understand. An option is a run. It was so hard for you to watch it. You barely... An option is a run. Yeah. Pichetti probably watched it through his fingers because he was almost like, I can't look. I can't look. I'm so nervous. He was essentially Roman Roy in succession when the rocket blows up. And he sees the rocket blow up and he just puts the phone back in his pocket and he just goes on about his day. Yeah. You saw that and you're just like, I can't deal with this right now. Pretty much. All right. Before we get to some more games...

Quick word from our friends at Game Time. So football season is here. We can't wait to get out to some games this fall. With the help of Game Time, the official ticketing partner, Barstool Sports. I was in Madison on Saturday. I used Game Time. I used the Game Time Picks feature. Got great seats, 50-yard line. So you know how much we love Game Time. Now with their brand-new Game Time Picks feature, they're making it even easier to get to a game now.

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just pull up your chosen event and turn on the GT pick setting at the top of the screen or browse the best local game time pick deals near you on your game time app homepage. What are you waiting for? We're going to maybe buy those seats. Someone who's in Philly, buy those seats on game time picks. Download the game time app today. Use code PMT to easily score great deals with new game time picks. What time is it? Game time. We're also brought to you by our friends at Supercuts. Supercuts knows what you think. It's a

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where I'm going to go get my hair cut at Supercuts in a couple weeks. I'm due for a haircut, so Supercuts. Find a salon near you at supercuts.com. Supercuts, real smart hair. Okay. More games in the 10-game slate. Vikings 23, 49ers 17, Sam Darnold. Sam Darnold. Sam Darnold's back. Sam Darnold has arrived. Sam Darnold is our Baker Mayfield of this year. Yeah, it took him seven years, but he has finally arrived.

in the NFL. He's not one of the worst quarterbacks in the world, which he was with the Jets. He is now, dare I say, good? Yeah. He had a 97-yard touchdown pass to Justin Jefferson. Justin Jefferson did some awesome work with the cutback there. QBs should never have a 97-yard or more touchdown pass in the NFL. This is from our friend StatHole, who has a great blog every Monday recapping all the stats. Patrick Mahomes, he's

These are guys who have never had this, that Sam Darnold now has. Patrick Mahomes, Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Dan Marino, John Elway, Joe Montana, Aaron Rodgers, Troy Eggman. Pretty good group of quarterbacks, and they never did what Sam Darnold did today. And it was incredible. It was a great pass. It was. And you can't help but root for Sam either.

Yeah. I feel like he's one of those guys where, through no fault of his own, he's been just kind of like run through the dog shit. He was on those hyperdrive jets, right? When they were turning the offense to hyperdrive. He was poisoned by Adam Gase. Yeah. Yeah. So you have to root for a guy like that to come back. And yeah, he looked good today against his old team. Yeah. I was very happy to see it. The 49ers did not look great. Fred Warner. No.

By the way, that guy, he is so fun to watch. Yeah. As fun of a linebacker. That's a football player. It's a football player. That guy plays football and he does it very well. I wouldn't smash the panic button yet if I was a 49ers, but today I thought about the panic button. It's not. So Brock Birdie was under fire all day, it felt like. Brandon Ayuk has still not got going, which I guess I understand. And Christian McCaffrey is now, is he on the, is he out for four weeks at least? He's on the IR. Okay.

So not panic button because I think the 49ers could play bad and still tread water for a month because they have so much talent. Yeah. But if you're a super, you're, you're,

Expecting to go back to the Super Bowl, it hasn't been the greatest start with the fact that Christian McCaffrey is out for a while and the Vikings defense kind of ate you up a little bit. Brian Flores, he's a good defensive coach. Not a good head coach, good defensive coach. Yeah, they ate you up for sure. Christian McCaffrey being out week one didn't really seem to matter at all, but you think about how good the 49ers are and how many options they have.

And you're like, oh, that won't be a problem not having Christian McCaffrey. But then all you're saying is that you're just going back to the pretty good 49ers that you had before Christian McCaffrey. Right. And then he just makes your offense look entirely different when he's on the field. Right. You can't play defense against the 49ers the same way at all when he's just there. Right. His presence makes it a huge difference. Hank, what do you think about Christian McCaffrey? When do you think he's going to come back? How long do people usually stay on the IR for? Four weeks is minimum.

And he just went on this week? Yeah. So probably no around week six. Yeah? You think he's definitely coming back? Yeah, I don't see why he wouldn't. Yeah. Okay. You think he loves football? Not like a Barry Sanders situation? Yeah, he's a football – he's from a football family, football guy through and through. He is. He is a football family. Yep. Good point. Brian Flores – this just popped in my head. I want to see how I can phrase this. Do you think there was a part of Brian Flores –

Well, we know Brian Flores isn't the nicest guy, right? I think that's been established. Do you think a part of him was...

Like, man, Tua's concussion means I can't say, see, I told you so, with how bad Tua was playing before the concussion. Oh, yeah, he probably thought about that. He was definitely rooting against Tua. Yeah, he probably was, like, telling people, see, I told you so, and then had to delete the text message after Tua got the concussion because, obviously, that was a horrific concussion. He was probably upset. He was playing horrible before the concussion.

Right, so Brian Flores was like, damn, now I can't say, hey, I told, to his close friends, he probably would say, hey, I told you so. He was equally upset with the hit as he was with not being able to take victory laps about two. Correct. Yeah. Because you know that. That's actually what the Vikings, the Vikings have done a very good job. They've just completely sequestered him from Sam Darnold. Yeah. Brian Flores should not be allowed to even look at Sam Darnold. Right. Because he'll just eat him alive. Don't let him speak to a quarterback ever.

He probably mutters under his breath like, Sam Donald, you're not worth shit, dude. But I think that might be a mark of a great defensive coordinator. Yeah. If you hate quarterbacks that much. True. That you just will do anything to break them down. Yeah. Yeah, that's great. Just coach defense. Yeah. This game also could have gone very differently if Jordan Mason hadn't fumbled. Was it Jordan Mason who fumbled? I think Jordan Mason fumbled. He fumbled at the goal line going in. Yeah. And that...

Like, the 49ers, that's why the panic button would be super, because you just had some plays...

not go your way even though the vikings deserve this win because their defense was very good but like that fumble took all the momentum out of that game yeah how mad do you think fantasy owners are if they drafted chris mccaffey first overall hank what do you think might be a class action lawsuit yeah they're mad but they're but it's not like he's it's not like anything else is going on there right hank i don't think so okay oh wait maybe it was brock purdy who fumbled brock purdy did fumble and i think debo might have recovered it

Maybe the stat sheet saying lost was only one from Brock Purdy and Jordan Mason had a fumble as well. I don't know. Either way, they fumbled on the goal line. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Jets 24, Titans 17. Memes. Congrats, memes. Let's go. All the apps still on your phone?

All the apps still on my phone. All TVs intact. Yes. Let's go, memes. So how are we feeling? Currently feeling great. Beginning of the game, I was in a dark place because it was one of those times a flat circle. The Patriots are good and the Jets suck. Yeah. Because it looked like the Patriots were...

Going to win. Going to win. I mean, it was 7-0. Now, Memes, you're a big TV setup guy, right? Yes. Like at your house. It's quite the setup. How many do you have? Four. Four in the one room, one in the other. So, Memes, you're also a big interactions, impressions guy on social media, correct? Correct. Have you thought about if the Jets lose a big game, sacrificing one of those TVs to

just to do numbers. You could buy another one easily. Just smash one. You've done it many times. Well, no, I was going to if the Titans scored a touchdown and got the two-point conversion. Which they would have gone for two. Were you going to film it? Probably not. It would have just been a full kick. Well, you've got to film it.

You've got to have a GoPro going. Yeah, I'll set one up on the ceiling so it captures it. I don't think I have time to take the phone out. It's just got to be all one motion. Have you thought about which TV you're going to sacrifice when it does happen? The one all the way to the left. Okay, that's the bastard child. You don't like that one? Memes, how are you feeling about Nathaniel Hackett and Robert Salah? First quarter, I wanted every single person fired. As the game progressed...

I'm okay. Because there's a chance Robert Salah is just not a good head coach, but he always had the excuse of Zach Wilson as his quarterback. Yeah, there's a very good chance. Because the Jets were kind of sloppy again. A lot of penalties. There was multiple times where I feel like Aaron Rodgers, the play clock, they had to call timeouts.

I believe that was on Aaron Rodgers. Okay. Okay. He just forgot. He forgot about time. Yep. Okay. It'll happen when you're in a darkness retreat. Yeah. What do you think about my guy Braylon Allen?

Badger. Braylon Allen's a stud. Having him and Brees Hall in the same backfield is a problem. Yeah, it is. Do you want the craziest woe stat? Yes. It was such a woe stat that I actually had to call Jake and tell him the stat because I knew he'd appreciate it. I swear to God, I called him like an hour ago. Braylon Allen is the youngest player to score a touchdown in the NFL in almost 100 years, since 1930. 1930 was the last time there was someone as young as him. Braylon Allen today is 20 years old, 239 days old.

In 1930, Arnie Herber...

Was 20 years old, 239 days. The exact same age. They're both from Wisconsin. They both are Badgers. That was the last time someone as young as him scored a touchdown to the day. So they tied. Yeah. Arnie Herbert was a problem. I watched some of his. He was actually the first one to pass. Was he really? Yeah. So was he quarterback or running back? He was both. Okay. So kind of like a dual threat. Yeah, like a Justin Fields. I like that. Yeah. Yeah. Memes. Braylon Allen. He is very, very explosive. Yeah.

And this is why running backs should be allowed to enter the draft earlier. Because you get guys like that that are ready, and then they get to their second contract by the time they're, what, like 24, 25 years old? Yeah, I mean, he's young. He's always been young. Then you can dip on a second contract. But yeah, he's very fun to watch. He was 17. Was that a woe for you? That was a woe. It's crazy. My mind is blown. We might need you to make an Arnie, like Arnie Herber was a problem highlight reel. What team did he play for? He played for the Packers. So he had a crazy story. He...

Played freshman for Wisconsin. Yep. Then went to Regis College in Denver, and Regis College disbanded their football team. And so he moved back. He's from Green Bay. He moved back to Green Bay and was working as a janitor. And then they were just like, he's like, can I try out for the team? And then he was a problem. And then he was a phenom. And then he scored. Is this him right there? Yeah. He's running the ball. He's passing the ball. I saw one where he threw backhand.

One of the worst passes ever but it worked Look at that back foot He's actually known as like the Predecessor to like the Sammy Ball Like the guys who started like really throwing the ball This is sick Arnie Herber Problem

Look at him. Look at that field. It's trash. Bang. Dime. Oh, I love the ref. Is that a milkman? Yeah. It looked like a milkman got lost. The ref uniforms used to be newsboy caps and then pajamas. That guy rules. And there's, yeah, look at that. That was a tight spiral. Yeah, they're probably saying that's witchcraft. You can't pass the ball. Arnie Herber, problem.

So yeah, that 20 years old, 239 days. That's where Allen Allen did the exact same thing today. Yeah, I do like how Nathaniel Hackett is kind of figuring out all these guys that they actually do have in their offense. Allen was this week. Next week, they'll figure out Mike Williams. One week, they'll figure out every single person they have on the team. When is Garrett Wilson going to be figured out?

Thursday night. Okay. So Nathaniel Hackett is essentially renting an Airbnb, and you get there, you check in at night, and then the next day you're like, oh, there's this room? Yeah, essentially. Oh, shit. They got a back patio? Oh, cool. We can just unlock everything here. Yeah. One week at a time, though. Okay. Can't expect too much from him. Yeah, you can't put too much on his plate. No. GTL for Thursday? GTL. Guess that line. Oh. Oh.

Where's the game being played? New York. I'm going to say it's New York. In New Jersey, I'm going to say the New Jersey Jets minus three and a half. I was going to say four. What is it? I'm going to guess four and a half. I'm going to say five. We've covered it all. Max, do you want to go five and a half or do you want to go two and a half? I'll go two and a half. Oh, wow. Okay. We've got it all. I guess we didn't have three. All right. Do we have a line? Is anyone looking at it?

Hank, when you say, should we do GTL, you should look up GTL. So then you can tell us the GTL. My phone's dead. Oh, again? Whoa, Jets minus seven. Seven. Our advanced stats say you got to hammer the Patriots. Yeah, I'm going to hammer the Patriots. Damn. Wow. Damn. Wow. It must have been Braylon Allen. He's only 20 years old, 239 days. Maybe, do they know Drake Mays starting? Oh. Does Vegas know something? Push the ball downfield. Yeah. Yeah.

Will Levis we like. Yep. Will Levis needs to maybe go to a Mike Pence conversion therapy where they're like sacks are okay. That'd be the opposite. Yeah, that'd be the opposite. No sacks. Taking a sack is okay. No, still not Mike Pence. He did the same thing, different because it wasn't a pick six, but it was a fumble where he was getting sacked and he just threw the ball backwards when they were going in on the six-yard line.

Yeah, it's OK to take a sack. We'll let us play better today, but it's OK to take a sack and not do. It's actually Briscoe said he's kind of like Josh Allen, early Josh Allen. And there is a similarity in that just mash all the buttons and hope to play work. That play was it was full Josh Allen. Yeah, bad Josh Allen. I think Josh Allen did that exact same play when he was in the playoffs was against the Texans.

I believe it was. Um, it was the same game where he threw the bomb downfield to the fullback. Right. Yeah. He, it was the exact same type of play where he was upside down and then threw the ball underhand to some guy that wasn't standing there. Yes. And one of the worst fumbles that you'll ever see. He does. He is a little bit crazy. Crazy. I think you're going to get a lot of, he's crazy. Uh,

When he throws the ball downfield, sometimes it looks really good coming out of his hands. He's got a strong arm. He can look good. He can run. But he needs to be just like 20% less crazy. Yeah. Maybe even 40% less crazy. Because the Titans defense is good. Yeah. They are. That's a good defense. And he's got some weapons too. Yeah, they could have won. Yeah. The Titans are the number one 0-2 team that could easily be 2-0. Yeah. LeJerry Sneed.

Pretty good at defense. Yeah. Calvin Ridley. Great catch. Unbelievable catch. Just dial back to crazy. Just turn it down a little bit. Yeah. And just remind yourself that, hey, getting sacked is not the worst thing. Was it his offensive coordinator or his head coach that was like, hey, Will, what the fuck are you doing? I think it was Brian Callahan. Was that Brian Callahan? Yeah. Who we like as well. We like him too, yeah. Titans are going to be...

They're not going to make the playoffs, but I think they will be one of those spoiler teams, tough out teams. You've seen it through two weeks, but just turn down the crazy a little. Yeah. Also, that's the complete correct reaction from your coach when you do something like that. Oh, 100%. Maybe we all were thinking that. You don't want to nurture that. You don't want to be like, that's okay. It'll be better next. No, you want to correct that problem immediately. Yeah, you want to. Yeah.

You want to basically, they should do the, I know it's kind of like a trope. It doesn't actually, I hope it doesn't still happen, but like you catch your kid smoking a cigarette, you make him smoke an entire pack of cigarettes. Yeah. They should just have him just keep getting sacked and throwing it backwards and being like, another fumble. Fuck you. What are you doing? I was going to say, actually, the next time they catch him doing that, you should make him smoke a whole pack of cigarettes. That too.

I think that would fix the problem. That's actually the best way to correct any behavior. If he was just sitting on the sidelines, like what happened, Will? Why are you smoking this pack of cigarettes? Did another crazy... I turned the ball over. Crazy play where I could have easily just taken a sack. I actually think that would work. Yeah.

Yeah, he should do that. Or ban Mayo from him. Yeah. If you take away the Mayo, maybe he'll stop doing it. That's cruel. You just give it as a treat. Yeah. He's like, hey, you can't have Mayo this week unless you turn down the crazy. Instead of the things that go around your neck, the collars that prevent concussions, he should just wear an actual shot collar. Yeah. And so during the game, just buzz him. Yeah, you buzz him when you need him to just go down for a sack. Yeah, that is Mike Pence. Yeah. Yeah, there it is. We found it. Okay, next game.

Packers 16, Colts 10.

Malik Willis did it. There should be a giant blinking sign that appears on this podcast that whenever I say this is my favorite game to bet of all time, that you should take the opposite of what I say. And we call it in real time too. Yeah. I like to pack. They were my mortal. I am a big advisors. I'm a giant square. I have four equal distance sides. I have four, six lines of symmetry. However many square has, that's me. I'm square. When I told you I was going to bet this game heavier than any other game,

that was the most obvious sign of all time that when, uh, when it's reached me, when that level of confidence has reached me, you should do the exact opposite of what I say. Here's the thing. You can't, you, you weren't wrong in the fact that betting against Malik Willis is probably a good idea. The, it just overshadowed that. Uh, and I know that I I'm, I'm in for a war. We're going to get to the bears game. I'm in for a war next week with the Colts fans, uh, because the bears play the Colts, but, uh,

Anthony Richardson is just not that good at quarterbacking right now.

Right now, he could get better. I know that there were also some drop passes, so I'll say that right up front. There were definitely drop passes for Anthony Richardson, but he had two very, very bad interceptions and missing guys. And the Packers, like I said on Friday, I thought they were going to just run the ball. They ran the ball 53 times. They basically were like, Malik, here's the game plan. We're going to have you throw it.

I think he threw it 14 times. He's 12 for 14. We're going to play defense, and we're going to let Anthony Richardson make the mistakes, not you make the mistakes. And it was – we give Matt LaFleur a lot of shit. I think he's a phenomenal coach, and this game showed it. Like this was a coaching game where Matt LaFleur was like, I know that I got my hand behind my back with Malik Willis, but I have a path, and this is the path, and the Packers ran it to perfection.

Yeah, it was ugly for the Indianapolis defense. And their run defense stinks. This is two games where they've gotten absolutely gashed. And it was ugly. And Josh Jacobs fumbled. They did fumble. On the goal line. They got a break on that one. So yeah, it was mostly about the Packers just owning the clock and then letting Anthony Richardson make the mistakes.

He did not play well. Malik Willis played better than I thought that he would, too. Yeah. I was surprised. So he obviously didn't win the game for the Packers, but he had over 100 yards passing for the first time in his career. So that's pretty impressive. He ran the ball. The Packers had the ball for 40 minutes. And the Packers have now won 12 straight home openers.

That's the longest streak in the NFL and the next longest going into this weekend. I'm not sure where it is now, but the next longest was three going into this weekend. Yeah. So now I guess that would be 13 straight home openers that the Packers have won. Yeah. So tough place to play no matter what time of year. Yeah. And they looked, I mean,

Normally I'd be mad that the Packers won a game like this, but because I prepared myself and I was like, I think they're going to win this game because I think Matt LaFleur is going to do a really good job getting them ready. I was ready for it. And again, Anthony Richardson, I just don't see it what other people see. Maybe, Hank, you're an Anthony Richardson guy. What do you see? And I know everyone's going to come after me and be like, Caleb Williams has not looked good through two games. I agree. We're going to get to that.

The only difference is Caleb Williams was really good in college. Anthony Richardson wasn't. So that's where I'm like, I don't know where it came from. He's got a great PR team, Anthony Richardson. The college game that I saw him in, he was the greatest player I've ever seen play in person. Yeah. I know there's all setting up for Anthony Richardson to ball out against the players. Anthony Richardson also had some cool games last year before he got injured. He's got, obviously, that arm doesn't grow on trees. So again, I feel like I'm repeating myself. I apologize if I am. I understand...

Drafting him as a project is just not there yet. He should be a favorite on the road. I would say that Anthony Richardson highlights are up there with almost any other quarterback's highlights. Yeah. If you just watch his good plays. And the lowlights are tough. Lowlights are very, very bad. Yeah. Yeah. So you still believe in him? No. Okay, we had a quick technical issue. Hank just teleported over the couch. We also forgot where we were in our conversation. Quick in the pocket. Took a minute. Oh, Anthony Richardson. Quick in the pocket. No accuracy, though.

Yeah, I think I said – I think I was explaining it to someone. His deep ball – if he could throw his medium deep ball and his short ball like his –

sometime deep ball yeah it would be sick if he could throw his short ball like his deep ball yeah yeah i agree because his deep ball is awesome yeah except when he throws picks on it yeah yeah he's look i think he's exciting to watch when he plays well but right now he's got a lot of work to do yeah young quarterbacks shouldn't be judged by uh

A few games. He's what, on his fifth game? Yeah. I'm just saying I don't see it right now. Maybe it could be the offensive line's fault. Could be. Could be the defense fault. Could be. Could be. The rushing defense... Indianapolis needs to figure out the run defense. Yeah. I mean, again, I just walked away from this game being like, this is what... I've known it forever. The Packers run a model organization. That's what they fucking do. They're annoying that way. They have a guy who, by all...

Like visuals can't play quarterback in the NFL and they bring him out there and then he wins a game. That's what they do. That's what the Packers fucking do. I think Hank give him a, he gave him a nickname prematurely. What do you say? Tony rich, Tony rich, Tony rich, a little too soon for that. Tony Ray was not Tony rich. Also a shout out Josh Myers for puking on the ball and then still snapping it.

Yeah, that was a great part of the game. Wouldn't Malik say, like, I didn't throw the ball because it had puke on it? Yeah. Yeah. Not a gamer. And the ref, I guess, went up to Matt LaFleur after the game was like, or maybe after the play and said, hey, if that happens again, do you want us to stop the play? He's like, yeah, I'd appreciate that. That'd be fun. Now, is it a flag if your center pukes on a defensive lineman?

I don't think so. Because I would think used to piss on people. Yeah, I would. I would train my offensive line to do that. Yeah, it was. That was quite a visual, though. Just puking directly on the ball and then snapping it. Yeah. Then Malik Willis didn't throw the ball. Yeah, because he had puke on it. Now, next week, we have a Malik Willis revenge game. He's playing the Titans. He's playing the Titans. So how do we handicap that?

Because I feel like we got a good Malik game today. Are we going to bet on it to happen two games? I might just keep betting against Malik until I win. Just double my bet every time. I think it might be three and one against the spread.

And the Titans have snatched two defeats from the Jaws of Victory. Good line there, Hank. Yeah, but everyone's down on the Titans. Maybe I'm just cashing at the right time. Wait, so you're down on the Titans? I think I might double my bets every week against Malik Willis until I hit one. Got it.

Okay. Yeah. I mean, I feel like that's a good, it will happen eventually. It has to. Although Jordan love, that was weird when he was questionable and then doubt doubtful, but it was weird that he was even questionable for a minute. Yeah. It was really strange. Yeah. So then Jordan love could start and then I'd feel like a real asshole. Yeah. I was worried about that for you. I don't think I, truth be told, big cat, you'll probably agree with this. I think that,

It's just the Packers. If somebody puts on a Packers uniform... That's what I said. Then they become good at quarterbacking. It's bullshit. There's some teams where you put on their uniform and you become a bad quarterback. We know several of them. And then there are some teams where it's just you fit in. And it's, again, they have a backup quarterback and they're like, hey...

Here's what we're going to do. We're going to draw up a perfect game plan. Yeah. This is how we can win the game and play to our strengths. And then they execute it. And then you walk away saying, how the fuck did they just do that? And everyone tweets you being like Malik Willis has more wins or touchdown passes than Caleb Williams and shit like that. Yeah, that's mean. Yeah, that's bullshit. And for a while, it was also true that he had more 100-yard passing games. Yeah, but not anymore. Not anymore. Wow, you're feeling yourself with the handoff king.

Dude, he handed the fuck out of that ball. He's feeling himself with the handoff game. Jayden Daniels is good. He hasn't scored a touchdown. Browns. Yeah, but guess what? We won, Hank. We scored 21 points. First team in NFL history to win a game when your opponent scores three touchdowns and you don't score a single touchdown. Do you do offensive? Do false starts?

come back to the quarterback or is that not related depends it depends on what kind of false start yeah yeah because they had like 27 in the red zone they did yeah that's true and we overcame them yeah um all right browns jaguars do you want to see him fail hank

I think you want to see Caleb Williams fail. I want all of your teams to win. I don't at all. I want all of their teams to lose. I've been nothing but nice about Jaden. I want every team in this room to win. I want Caleb to be good. I was rooting for Caleb tonight. I'm starting to feel that's not the case. I was rooting for Caleb tonight. Hank and I just wanted Jaden Daniels to score a touchdown for the part of that. I bet that as well. And there were so many times he was in great situations and then

I was following the game cast on the plane. I think I'm the second biggest Caleb fan in this room. I don't think so. I don't think so. Why? I just don't think so. I think Hank. I have a My Fantasy team. Yeah, Hank probably is. I like Caleb Williams. I think if there's like a mouse in here, he might be. I don't know what else to say. Critter. I'm rooting for him. Creepy crawler on the ground. It's okay. He had a bad game. We're going to get to it, but it's okay. I can feel the shift. I felt the shift there.

I did. You guys both want your quarterback to be better than the other. Of course. Yeah, but I'm not rooting against Jaden Daniels. I have never said... You can find one bad thing I've ever said about Jaden Daniels. To be fair, I don't think PFT is... I understand the vibe. The vibe shift. I'm talking about vibe. Purely on vibes. I think they're...

Both of your vibes are shifting. I think Big Cat's... His vibe shifts at first. Big Cat's on... You're on high alert. No, I mean... Which is fine. I said the Malik Willis thing and then you're like, and also Malik Willis had more 100-yard passing games before Caleb Williams. That was... You basically turned into a Twitter responder. Well, at this point in the podcast, I was also feeling salty about losing my bet so badly because it was a big bet.

And so losing to Malik Willis, then I get mad about Malik Willis. I've been gracious about it. I bet the Packers have been very gracious. Yeah. I've been very gracious. I just fucking hate the Packers, and I know when they're going to win, and that was such a Packers game. I told you I wanted Caleb Williams to win nine Super Bowls, and then Jaden just gets three. I feel like that's pretty gracious. Yeah. We're doing a gracious off. Just saying the vibe shifted there. All right, Browns-Jaguars. Let's talk about the Browns-Jaguars.

Brown's defense is back. Trevor Lawrence had 16 yards in the first 35 minutes of the game, and they looked so bad. Yeah, I've got a sad Jaguar stat for you, courtesy of our good friend Uncle Chaps. He sent this one over to me. You know how long it's been since Trevor has his last victory as a starter? It's 294 days. Mm-hmm.

It's longer than the drought between his last college victory and his first NFL victory. Oh, man. So it's been a while. Urban Meyer is his coach's first year. Yeah, it's been a while for Trevor. The Browns didn't look bad today. And it seems like maybe having their starting tackles back makes it

pretty big difference. Yeah, they didn't look bad until they did look bad and tried to be the Jaguars. They tried to out Jaguar the Jaguars. They had the game in hand and then they're like, let's see if we can fuck around and give this game to the Jaguars. There was that moment with two minutes left where they had a third and thirty six

up 16-13. They ended up getting the safety, make it 18-13, but that was close. The Browns were close. They were close. The Browns also passed the ball for some reason when they had the ball and they were up late. They could have essentially run out the clock, but then they decided that they were going to get cute with it and try to pass. Did not work for them. It was nice to see Jameis out on the field. Yes. I guess he's their designated quarterback sneaker. Memes had the stat 1-0 in games that Jameis plays.

That's pretty good graphic. I think we've got a formula there. That's pretty good graphic. So are the Browns good or the Jaguars bad? I think Jags bad. Yeah, I think the Jaguars are bad. I think the Browns defense can still be good against bad quarterbacks. Yeah, Miles Garrett was making Trevor live in hell today. Yeah, and Trevor Lawrence did have, he ended up with two

220 yards but yeah it was it was ugly for a very long time yeah it was very it was a very ugly game weird weather and Deshaun Watson that one graphic oh man do we have that the latest allegation graphic yeah Deshaun he literally has he has like working in a factory and

you know, five days since the last time he's had an allegation against. I have it right here. Deshaun Watson latest. This was a graphic on the TV during the broadcast. Yeah. I said it's bad when they have the latest allegations graphic ready to go. Yeah. Latest allegations. Monday accused of sexual assault. New lawsuit this week strongly denies allegation of 2020 incident.

NFL reviewing under personal conduct policy. 2022 season served 11 game ban for violating conduct policy. Faces three active lawsuits alleging sexual misconduct. Settled 23 claims in 2022. Faced no criminal charges.

That's a rough graphic for you to interrupt a football game with. Yes. Now, I heard that when they restructured his contract, they did something with being able to cut him for moral issues. Yeah. So this summer, that report came out that they took the clause out where if he gets another suspension by the NFL, he can be cut immediately.

and not have to pay him as much. He's on a zero tolerance policy for committing sexual assault. Yes. Let that be a lesson. It's finally enough is enough. Yeah. After 22 allegations. Is it 22? I thought it was more. I forget how many. I think it might be in the 30s. Well, I don't know by the time this podcast comes out. I think we learned our lesson last week.

Yeah, the Browns didn't look great. Their offense didn't look great. Jerome Ford looked okay at times, but they're not back where they were last year. No. They don't look like they did with Flacco. No. You can't go with a different vibe than...

Joe Flacco to Deshaun Watson. Bad vibe. It was also Deshaun Watson's birthday this weekend, which the Browns pointed out by they put out a post on Instagram and on Twitter. It seems mean because you know the admin knew exactly what was going to happen with the comment section. I don't know. Maybe that's in his contract.

You have to wish me a birthday. I could see him doing that. I could see that too because there's no other reason for them to just subject themselves to the worst possible replies. Yeah. It's like, well, I guess they know it's going to do numbers. They just stood out there and took it. It's going to do interactions. Memes, why isn't that part of our social media? Yeah, why didn't we wish him a happy birthday? We should start wishing Deshaun Watson. Please put that in the calendar. Yeah, for next year. Make sure you wish him a happy birthday on the part of my take socials. I think he has this blocked.

It doesn't matter. Yeah, that's fine. Still wish him a happy birthday. Means we're getting too close to the truth. To the truth. All right. Last game of the early slate. Chargers 26, Panthers 3. This is exactly what we expected to happen. It happened. Jim Harbaugh has completely changed the culture. Now, the Panthers are bad. Very, very bad. Worst team in the NFL. Jim Harbaugh has completely changed the culture of the Chargers to the point where Quentin Johnson is catching...

Yeah, crazy, right? But it actually is. And I know... So I think there's some new... Not new listeners, but also new just people to Jim... Like my love affair with Jim Harbaugh, which has been a very long time. I had to have it kind of under wraps when he was the Michigan head coach just because I don't like Michigan. Now that he's back in the NFL, I'm going to be posting every single thing the guy does because I love him to death. But the... Like his...

of Quentin Johnson this summer, I feel like gave Quentin Johnson the confidence to be like, you know what? I can catch, and that is my job. Yeah. Let me go do it. Yeah, you need somebody else to believe in you sometimes. And that's what happened. And he said it after. He's like, everyone just piles on the guy, and he's a good football player, and he's going to be a good football player for us. It's like Jim Harbaugh has changed the culture where Quentin Johnson is catching football.

And now Justin Herbert is accepting pregame Dap ups from Jim where he just beats the shit Out of his shoulder pads and his back The look that Harbaugh gave him after the first week Where he's like no we're not hugging This is what I do to quarterbacks for every game And then week two it rolls around And Herbert's ready for it He's ready for it, he's ready to contact now Harbaugh's been so much fun to watch Now if you're a Panthers fan, I do have a stat that will make you feel better I feel like we should give them a little bit of positive Try to find something That Panthers fans can be like mildly

Okay about So this is the stat to make you feel better of the week If you're a Panthers fan Bryce Young had 38% more passing yards In the first half than Trevor Lawrence had So Bryce had 22 yards Passing in the first half Trevor Lawrence had 16 yards passing In the first half So that's big Bryce Young did That little hop he did to try to get it over the lineman Was so cute I feel bad for Bryce Young I feel bad for Adam Thielen

It's they're a tough watch. Yeah, really, really tough watch. Yeah, there's not a lot to look forward to about those games. The Panthers didn't get a first down until their fifth drive of the game. And then when they got the first down, the very next play was a Bryce Young interception. That's sad. Now, is there something that Carolina Panthers fans could do to do like a reverse major league to make?

Yeah.

But if I was a Panthers fan, I would strongly consider trying to ask him to move the team. Yeah, this is bad. He said, asked about his confidence. Bryce Young says his confidence is in the Lord.

At least he's getting it from somewhere. That's good. Yeah. They're a tough watch. It's in God's hands. It's in God's hands. That was the worst matchup for them because the Chargers are a man football team now. They ran the ball 44 times. Jim Harbaugh just – I mean, yeah, the team is Jim Harbaugh's identity. He's so enwrapped in everything that he asked the equipment staff this week to

to give him Justin Herbert's shoes, whatever sneakers he wears, because there's not a gene in his body I wouldn't immediately trade for, talking about Justin Herbert. That's amazing. That was his quote. That's amazing. I love it. And I love that he's wearing his shoes now because it probably makes him feel like a quarterback too. Yeah. He's like, I'm a real ball player. Yeah, I'm ready to go. I'm ready to go. So he is keeping the team out east. We talked about this on Thursday. Yep. So they're staying in Charlotte this week. Body clock.

He said, bring the board games for the trip. I looked into it. I found out the board game that they're bringing along. I think this was on The Athletic. It's called Chameleon. It can be played by anyone from three to eight players. One player is secretly designated as the Chameleon. A code word is also selected. The other players must figure out who the Chameleon is before the Chameleon figures out the code word.

That sounds like a fun game. Ooh. So Harbaugh loves it. Sounds like wolf. Yeah, werewolf. Yeah, sounds a little bit like Secret Wolves, right? Yeah, werewolf. So they're going to just be playing Chameleon all week, which should be fun. Just a little boys trip. And Harbaugh was like, I love it. It reminds me of just being back in training camp doing this road trip. I get it. I get it for him. But also, training camp was like three weeks ago. Yeah. Four weeks ago. But he misses it. He misses training camp already. He misses it so much. He's a football guy. Yeah. Now, for Bryce Young, he set a record today. So...

He threw for 84 yards on 18 completions, which is record low for that many completions. Panthers haven't led a game in 272 days. I guess 273 now. It's a long time without a lead. So I have a question for you, Big Cat. Yeah. Can the Panthers – should the Panthers bench Bryce? So –

Why would you? Because he's not very good. But what's the point? Are you trying to win football games? Well, in theory. In theory. Theory. But you would have... If you're just this bad all year, you'd have the number one pick. Then you can draft a quarterback of your choosing. Yeah. I see what you're saying. I do think they would maybe fuck around and win a couple games with Andy Dalton. I guess the question is what... Because it...

It sucks for Bryce Young. I don't know if he ever would have been a good quarterback, but it doesn't feel like it's ever going to happen in Carolina. I feel like that part is kind of done because even if he plays the rest of this year –

There's no way the Panthers are going to be good enough where they're like, we're going to keep them going forward, especially if they have the number one pick. Okay, so Canales was brought in to fix Bryce Young. Right. Because he's obviously still a very young quarterback. They still probably hope that he can be good. You can't give up hope in year two. Yeah, so they hired a head coach to fix him.

He's not playing well right now. Would he play better if he was benched right now and got to sit for a while and watch Andy Dalton? Would that improve the long-term prospects for Bryce Young? I don't know if it would. I don't know. I don't think anything would improve. Maybe. I guess you could try it. Bryce Young? But then Andy Dalton, then you come into the problem of Andy Dalton plays better.

Everyone in the locker room is like, his guy's better. You try to go back to Bryce Young, and everyone in the locker room is like, what the fuck are you guys doing? We're putting our bodies on the line, and you just benched the better quarterback? And then Bryce Young understands that the better quarterback is A.D. Dalton, and then he feels weird about playing. I mean, he probably feels weird about his play right now. Yeah. I mean, it sucks. It's a bummer. I feel bad for him. It's a tough watch. He didn't complete a pass over 10 air yards, and he only attempted two of them.

Over 10 air yards. Yeah. So he's just not even... Was one of those a cute little jump? It might have been. No, that was kind of a... Sideways. Yeah, yeah. Side lines, yeah. It's a tough watch. The last thing is, I think you posted this as well, PFT, but the Harbaugh quote that we got to play for the people is so, so good. I'm going to play it here. Let's see. I'm going to find it. Let me get it. Ready for this? Yep. I love guys who like football. And guys who like football, they like me back.

I like them back. Even guys that don't like football, they try to avoid me because I'm always trying to get them to like football more. One of the best quotes ever. I have a Roback question for you, P.F. Roback.com, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, promo code TAKE. 20% off your first purchase, Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com, promo code TAKE. Let me play it one more time, then I'm going to ask my question. I love guys who like football.

Without saying too much, I think we should remix this and make it our new intro. Okay?

What do you think? I'm in. Yeah. I mean, it's the perfect quote. He literally made that quote for us. I like guys who... He described our podcast. One of my favorite parts about that quote is he said, I love guys who like football. Yeah. So you don't even have to love football for Jim Harbaugh to love you. Right. You just have to like football. Right. If you like football, then he loves you. And then later on in the quote, he almost says, even guys who don't like football, he was almost saying, I like those guys too, but then he stopped himself and he was like...

Well, no, they probably don't like me because I'm always trying to get them to love football. Right, which is so applicable to all of our lives where it's like people who don't like football. Everyone's been in that social setting where it's like you find someone who doesn't like football and you can get through maybe a few minutes of conversation and then it's just boom.

Wait, so what do you do on Sundays? You don't watch football? Then what's your life? What do you do? What do you care about? What do you love? We might as well just be from different countries. I don't understand this. I love guys who like football. There should be a dating app for just guys that like football. Yeah. It's called Yahoo Fantasy Football. I like that. It's called DraftKings DFS, which how did we finish? Did I win? I was close. Yeah? How did you finish? Dead last. Oh, okay.

That was a great setup. I was close as fuck. You were? One point. Should we remix that and make it an intro? I think we should. I'm already working on it. Oh, hell yes, Max. I like it. Let's go. All right. So that's a... I'm excited about that. And he's our good friend.

It really is. It's so refreshing that I can just embrace and enjoy everything that Jim Harbaugh does again. Because it was like this when he was with the Niners, and then when he went to Michigan, I was like, well, I got to take a step back here because I got to play them and all that shit, and now we're back. It's great. I would watch a Hard Knocks on just...

Jim Harbaugh. Yeah. Just Jim Harbaugh. Like a nature show. Yeah. Like a guy in a khaki outfit just following him around like he's a wildlife photographer. Yeah. Observing Jim and talking about all the things that Jim's doing. Yeah. I did see a very funny Michigan fan, it seemed like, online basically trying to get – it was very clear it was one of those people that only watches college football. Yeah. They're like, it took Jim Harbaugh two weeks to tie Urban Meyer's wins in the NFL. Yeah.

He was in the NFL for a while, and he won a lot of games before that. Yeah, I like that, though. Because usually it's all the other way around. It's like NFL guys parachuting into college football and then talking about those players and then to see it come the other way. That's nice. That guy was watching the Chargers game and be like, wow, Jim Harbaugh's a pretty good NFL coach. You know, a lot of times these guys don't translate to the NFL. But Harbaugh does. So, yeah, Panthers are the biggest bummer. And I don't know what the spread...

Who are they playing next week? Oh, I think they're playing the Raiders. Whose line is it anyway? Where is it? Can you find it? Yep. It's in Las Vegas, I believe. I don't. The Panthers are going to get to a point, if they keep losing like this, where their spreads are going to get. They're going to be like college football spreads. Can you imagine? Yeah. Okay. I'm going to say Raiders minus seven. I'm going to say Raiders minus seven and a half.

One of you is correct. Which one? Big cap. Seven. All right, so it'll probably be seven and a half. Let me see. I'm going to look up the Panthers' schedule real quick. Let's see where... Let's find their win. Not only find their win, but I want to see how outrageous these games are going to get. A nice five and five split next week, too. Yeah. I like that. Bengals week four.

is going to be a pretty, that's going to be like a 10. So they play the Chiefs, looks like after Thanksgiving. I mean, that could be like a 17 points. That's mean. Yeah.

They play the Eagles at the Eagles, Cowboys. Those could be creeping up 14, 17 points. Then you're going to be like, I have to bet them. Oh, shit. What? I didn't realize we had a Tony Rich Caleb Williams bowl next weekend. Yeah. Dude, that's what I've been saying. Hello? I didn't realize that was all leading up to this. Now the feelings make more sense. I was saying that I'm like, it's going to be... No matter what, it's going to be hell for me for four hours because...

It's just going to be hell. It's going to be hell. Where have you been? Sorry. That was like a point of conversation. I didn't realize it was next week. That's the entire point behind the Rich stuff. But I'm saying all this stuff knowing there's a chance that Anthony Richardson could beat Caleb Williams, and I'm just going to – I will have to deactivate my Twitter. Yeah. All right. Let's get to – we'll do a couple ads, and then we'll get to the afternoon games and talk Sunday night football.

We'll get back to the games in a second. They're brought to you by SimpliSafe. Have you ever felt a sense of unease when you leave your home, wondering if everything is going to be safe while you're away? I know I have, but it wasn't until recently. I had a neighbor that had a break-in, and I realized how much I really love my SimpliSafe system. They've got Fast Protect monitoring. They've got Live Guard protection. SimpliSafe agents can act within five seconds of receiving your alarm. They can even see and speak to intruders to stop them in their tracks.

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So, Chiefs outlast the Bengals. Bengals looked a lot better. Yep. A lot better. Joe Burrow looked okay. Yep, Joe Burrow looked okay. I was like, walked away from that game saying the Bengals that, I thought the Bengals might be in trouble. I was teetering on that with the wrist and everything and the water bottle. I do not think the Bengals are in trouble. They just couldn't beat the Chiefs because the Chiefs,

just are inevitable. Yeah, they're inevitable. A million times. We had one of the coolest interceptions ever by the Bengals. A one-handed grab down the sideline, and it was like this incredible play. Cam Taylor-Britt

And then like three plays later, Joe Burrow fumbled and everyone stopped playing and the Chiefs ran in for a touchdown. Yeah, and Cam Tiller-Britt was the guy that was talking shit about Xavier Worthy. Yes. And Xavier Worthy didn't beat him. Patrick Mahomes had, what, like 154 yards passing today? Yeah. So they limited him a little bit. And Xavier Worthy, two for 17. So he was kind of right. But there's an issue that I've seen creeping up, and it showed its head today. Maybe you'll agree with this. That last flag of the game. Yeah.

A lot of people have Chiefs derangement syndrome when it comes to the refs. Oh, yeah. A lot. And it's an issue. So occasionally the Chiefs will get calls, and I think the biggest difference is with the Chiefs, if they get a call that's borderline, they make you pay for it, and they end up winning the game usually if they get one thing that goes in their favor. This was a perfectly normal call.

And then you see all the people like across the NFL media landscape posting still shots of what appears to not be past interference. Correct. It was very clearly past interference. Yes. Listen, the Chiefs, we can complain about the Chiefs being thieves of joy.

But it doesn't always have to be the refs gave a win to the Chiefs. It's even one... I completely agree with everything you said. It's one more than that because it is the Bengals. Yes. And listen, we love Joe Burrow. We've spent some time in Cincinnati. Bengals fans, for the most part, are very good people. They also probably lead the league...

in online screen grabs, posting them constantly. This all started maybe with the DeMar Hamlin stuff, and it's not fair that we're doing a coin flip, all this shit. But Bengals fans and Chiefs fans is a very combustible thing.

And then you add a defensive pass interference, which I agree was, it was pass interference. Uh, and you have what's going on right now where we have the minute you have reply guys, uh, quoting the NFL rule book, you know, you're in too deep. Yes. And we have, and then I don't know if you've seen this PFD, but, uh, Bengals fans have now also, and I'm not, I'm not judging Bengals fans cause I would do the same thing. So I just want that on the record that Bengals fans, you have every right to be upset about this.

maybe for like two days. Then you've got to get on with the season. They found a holding call that was missed on that same play, so they're now screen grabbing that and throwing it under every single reply. But you're absolutely right. The Chiefs are very, very hard to beat, so if they get any call late in a game, whether it's warranted or not,

Everyone's going to be like, this is bullshit. The Chiefs already are really good. Why are we helping them out at all? Yeah, and if you remember that game last year where Mahomes did not get the call. Correct. And then after the game... It's the Packers, yeah. And then after the game, he was like, no, I'm not going to blame it on that. I'm not going to complain about that. I'm going to yell at my wide receivers. Yeah, like sometimes...

sometimes the shit doesn't go your way. And I get it too if you're a Bengals fan because you're furious. You played good enough to win. You lose at the last second. So you are... And you can find all the screenshots that you want if you just look at every play. You can just pause it and it'll be blurry enough and take a picture and be like, look, our guy got held on that one. You didn't call it. You have to have... So you can't just be like...

okay, I admit it, we lost. Great game, Chiefs. You have to fight it for a little bit. Yeah, you have to. You have to fight it and you have to be like, well, we didn't really lose. The refs fucked us. Yeah. And that'll make you go to sleep a little bit better if you can be angry at somebody that's not your own team. Right. Or just you want to delay accepting the fact that the Chiefs are just really good when it counts. Right. And they just are. We should note there was that one game where he did complain.

Remember he went up, I think it was after, I think he went up to Josh after a game and was like, that was bullshit and you know it. He apologized afterwards. But that was heat of the moment. Bengals fans are in heat of the moment right now. You get 48 hours, go off.

say everything you want you it's going to make you feel a little bit better it's not going to change anything yes screen grabbing but it will make you feel better screen grabbing the nfl rule book is a wild move right especially the one that was going around which was like you don't have to call pass interference if the defender is making a normal play of the ball and they're not like trying to move the other guy out of the way then you could say that about almost every right interference you'd be like i think he was trying to make a play on the ball and here's a pathetic fact about all of us and i'm talking to

All the listeners, all of us in this room, and this is just the truth. When you get screwed in a game like this, when you think you get screwed in a game like this, because again, we don't think that they got screwed. That was the right call. When you think you get screwed in a game like this,

Sometimes the best coping mechanism is to get in a hours long argument with a random person on Twitter. Yeah. That's what you do. You just, you, you, you go back and forth with someone and you try to well actually them and you never get to an actual point that makes any sense whatsoever. And you guys will never see eye to eye, but it's, it's kind of, it kind of brings off the stress and you're like, Hey, you know what? I feel better that I just had a, uh,

like two-hour argument with Fart Sniffer 69, and I don't even know where he is. Yeah, then you just get really mad at Fart Sniffer. Yeah, right. And you're like, this guy online. And then when he... Then you block him. Then when he makes a good point, you just stop responding to the conversation. Yeah, agree to disagree. And you move on. But you can see how the Chiefs are just...

morphing everybody into like a conspiracy theorist. Yes. When they win these types of games. It's cheapskate is what it is. And they're just like, this cannot be how the game ended. You must have cheated. I'm going to get to the bottom of this. It's kind of like the Super Bowl against the Eagles. Yeah. Where there's...

Two things can exist in the same exact universe where a penalty can be a penalty and you can also be mad that the game ended on that. Yeah. That's the truth. Like the Eagles penalty was a penalty and we all said, well, that was a really underwhelming finish for a Super Bowl. This game was a really good game that was hard fought back and forth and having it end on a penalty is...

When it felt like the Bengals had the Chiefs on the ropes, that sucks. And guess what, Bengals? I feel like even though you're 0-2 and you've got to start winning some games, which I think you will. A tough game on Monday. I think you proved that now that Joe Burrow is back –

You guys are the hardest out for the Chiefs. That's a fact. They are the hardest out for the Chiefs. If you ask the Chiefs fans, if you ask Patrick Mones, if you ask Andy Reid, you hit him with true serum, you're like, what team do you not want to play? It's the Cincinnati Bengals. Yeah, I think the Bills...

could be up there in that argument but if they haven't asked the Chiefs they'd say we'd much rather play against the Bills right then against the Chiefs it's not that the Bills are like head and shoulders better but I think right now I would put them easily ahead of the Bengals yeah the Bengals haven't won a game yet what is going on with T Higgins I don't know do we know it's

Yoshi's next up though. No, Yoshi's, he's fun. Yeah. He's good. Very fun. But Jamar Chase is in, Tee Higgins is out. It's exactly the opposite of what we thought it would be like two weeks ago. Yep. So I don't know what's going on with Tee Higgins. I think Jamar Chase and Tee Higgins, from every

I understand they just flip-flop with who's got the headlines this week that they're upset. That's what I'm saying. It was Jamar Chase until the last week of training camp, and then T. Higgins has an injury, and then some people are saying it's not a real injury. Then T. Higgins had to come out last week and say, I'm not faking it. It's real. I don't know. Can Bengals fans explain it to me? Because I've heard conflicting reports, but essentially what I understand is this all just goes back to the fact that Mike Brown is poor.

By NFL owner standards. Yeah. He's poor. He's poor. He doesn't have the money to throw at everyone and...

This is what ends up happening. He threw all the money at Joe Burrow, which he obviously should have, but now he's got to pay everyone else and it's difficult. And Jamar Chase says that he's not going to negotiate this season. He feels like they lied to him in the process. That's not good. So it's not good. It's not good, whatever's happening. And I think it does boil down to the fact that he doesn't like spending money. Yeah. You forced him. He had his back up against a wall and had to give a massive contract to Joe Burrow. Yeah.

And so now he doesn't have any money for his receivers. Yeah, this is why you should never draft really good players because then you have to pay them. Yep, fact. What a curse. We also have gotten a little too far with...

Everything that Patrick Mahomes does is the best thing ever because did you hear that clip that Tony Romo, when Patrick Mahomes, he just missed Travis Kelsey. He underthrew Travis Kelsey. It went in the dirt, and Tony Romo, I got to find the quote. He basically was like, that's a winning play. He did that intentionally. It was so not intentional, but another Chiefs derangement where Patrick Mahomes could have an incompletion and Tony Romo would be like,

That was awesome. Dude, I've been watching quarterbacks that throw that incompletion for the last 25 years. There's nothing special. No. A lot of guys can throw that incompletion, but not like Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, he...

It was great. I feel like the Bengals are going to be okay. I really do. I watched that game being like, the Bengals are going to be fine. They do have to win a couple games. It's the September Bengals. They always get to this point where they're like, now we've got to win some games. They always start 0-2.

This is the third straight year starting 0-2, I think. Yeah, I might have to just bet on them to win the Super Bowl. It feels like they're probably a good price right now. They're probably good, yeah. Yeah, they started in a bad spot. It's crazy to say that the Pittsburgh Steelers are 2-0 and the Bengals and the Ravens are 0-2. Yeah. Both badly need a win. Who do the Bengals have next week? Bengals have the Commanders. Oh. Monday Night Football. Then they badly need a win. It's an LSU quarterback party. Yeah. And I'm going to be...

staring at it and they play so the Bengals have the commanders and Panthers next two weeks yeah this feels to me like I'm about to get my ass kicked so this should be the Bengals should get right ish the only good news is that it's not the standalone Monday game yeah I feel like we play worse when we have the nation's undivided attention on our shitty team yeah by the way update on Dylan Raiola cosplaying as Patrick Mahomes

I feel very confident in my position that it's weird. What did he do this week? He did the exact replica of the run to the end zone to pump up the crowd doing this. Yeah. And then he did the jump that Mahomes does where he does a jump squat, and it was weird. Okay, that's strange. It's strange, but if it works. But if it works. No knock on the guy. He's a really good quarterback. It's weird what he's doing.

Do you feel confident in it, Hank? Oh, you have to defend it because of the Tatum-Kobe stuff. I don't think it's that weird. Wait, all right. Let me hear you out. Quarterback before the game goes up to his student section, gets him pumped up, and stretches. Okay, if a quarterback ran to the end zone and did the, let's fucking go. You're like, every quarterback does it every game. No, no. You're reaching. No, I'm... Hank...

Well, first of all, you don't watch college football, so I can't really... I mean... You don't even know what we're talking about. I saw the same highlight you saw on Twitter. And you don't think that that's weird? If you put them side by side, I'm sure if you did that with a million other quarterbacks... But then you add in the hair and the facial hair... It's a trending hairstyle. I'll agree with you if...

The facial hair and the regular hair weren't... If he had totally different hair, totally different facial hair, didn't wear the same shades, and he did the pump-up, I would agree with you. Like, that's... All right, whatever. That's fine. It's everything. Max, I feel like you're... He's a fucking... It's so weird. Thank you. And you know that it's weird. Thank you. Like, the look on Hank's face knows that... He knows that it's weird. Of course he does. He's playing devil's advocate, which I appreciate. It's what you do if you're an 11-year-old in your backyard. Yeah.

They're just kids. Now we hear the starting quarterback of Nebraska. They're just kids. He's a good quarterback. That's the craziest part. Be yourself. What happens if he gets drafted? I know. Is he going to still act like Patrick Mahomes when he's in the NFL? No, that would be an electric video, though. He shaves the head. Isn't he supposed to be the number one pick when he's available? It's not a knock on him as a person. It's just weird. I mean, it's so weird. I'm ready to say it's a knock on him.

It feels like he wants to steal his life. Yeah. It's weird. It's weird. So was that talented Mr. Ripley? Yeah. Is that the one where he just becomes people? Again, Hank has to defend it because of the Jason Tatum, Kobe Bryant. Yeah. Just kids. Just kids. Just kids. Just kids. I don't think it's that weird.

Can you imagine? Again, it's like you want to be the best quarterback in the world. Why not emulate the best quarterback? You are a starting quarterback for Nebraska. Why don't you just be yourself and be the best quarterback in the world? That's what he's doing. No. No. That's not what he's doing. He's getting the crowd pumped up. It's stretching.

What if it's just coincidence? What if he doesn't even know that he's doing Patrick Mahomes? He did kind of try to say that. He had a quote where he was like, yeah, I was playing baseball when I was growing up, which, okay. He's like, I didn't really watch football, so I don't... Or what did he say? No, he said that he was like, why do you wear number 15? And he goes, oh, yeah, I was a big Tim Tebow fan. Yeah, right. Yeah. Right. And it's like you were... No, it's Patrick Mahomes. It's Patrick Mahomes. Yeah. What if he starts dating a girl that looks like Britney?

What if he makes his brother act like Jackson? You have memes? There was also a story that he transferred to Nebraska because the colors of the jersey look more like the Chiefs than Georgia does. Is that true or is that something that you read? It's just a rumor and there were a lot of people saying it. Okay, a lot of people saying it. I like that rumor. He's a good quarterback. Yeah, he is. You guys are haters. I think it's very funny.

It's definitely weird, but it's also fun. I think it's cool. You should start doing it, Hank. You should. Not in my homes. Fuck that guy. You should start dressing like Shannon Sharpe.

Unk Lockwood. That would be cool. Unk Lockwood would be awesome. Double Unk. That'd be sick. All right, next game. Yeah, I'm happy we are in complete agreement that the world has Chiefs derangements. It is, and it pains me to say that because, like, yeah, sometimes the Chiefs, they beat teams that I would prefer to beat the Chiefs. I'm not saying I'm a Chiefs hater because I'm not. I respect the Chiefs. I respect greatness in all its forms.

When they beat the Bills in the playoffs, sometimes I'm like, yeah, I wish Josh Allen was able to beat this team and go to a Super Bowl. That'd be fun. So I'm not a Chiefs hater at all, and you're forcing me to have to show you, like open your eyes,

This is weird to complain about that pass interference goal. I also think the Chiefs fans have a little part in this. They have to do their part where they have to kind of morph into Patriots fans and just... Circle the wagons. Well, no, no. Just admit you're better than everyone and you're not going to bother with the peons of the NFL because that's the best...

The one thing that I can't stand is when Chiefs fans are like, well, we had so many bad quarterbacks before. Yeah, no shit. Everyone has had bad quarterbacks. You have the best quarterback. Just tell everyone that you're better than them. I would respect that more. Don't get in arguments. Don't say, oh, well, what about this call and this call that went against us? No, no, just say we're better than you.

Yeah. That's what you need to do because you're going to be the villain no matter what. You win enough that you have become the villains, embrace the villain role, and just be the villains of the NFL. Yeah. It's crazy because there are thousands of unique photo shops of refs wearing what appear to be Kansas City Chiefs gear. Usually it's like one or two. Yeah. There's like the ref doing the Lambeau leap. Yeah. There's that one. But with the Chiefs, it's seriously, I've seen thousands of them that are all different. Yes. Yes. Okay. Okay.

The Cardinals-Rams we can do quickly. Kyler Murray was sensational. Yeah, he was really good. Marvin Harrison Jr., awesome first quarter. Called it on Friday, yeah. Awesome first quarter for him. Is the first win over the Rams at home for the Cardinals since 2014. Ten years. I seriously...

Kyler was, he played perfect football to start that game. Yeah. And he was just hitting, he was making the right, like running at the right time, passing at the right time. Marvin Harrison, deep balls. James Conner might be my favorite running back to watch just because of how he runs. It's crazy that he can run that upright and just like roll over people. It is crazy. It's so much fun when he gets the ball with a head of steam and he's just standing, he

He looks like a different creature out there. They're not used to hitting a guy that's upright. Yeah, and he shouldn't be that tall. They don't make running backs like that. Yeah, it was a fun game if you're a Cardinals fan. If you're a Rams fan, you're in trouble. You're in trouble. Cooper Cup. I don't know if he's actually injured or if he tweaked something. And then Sean McVay smartly was like, don't play for the rest of this game. You don't have to hurt yourself anymore. We're already banged up to hell. So he didn't play in the second half.

And the Rams are already crushed by injuries right now. It feels like 2022 Rams. Yeah. When they had that year where it was just everyone got hurt at the same time and they were fucked. Yeah. Your offensive line is not looking great. Two receivers that are injured.

I felt bad for the Rams in the second. It looked like McVay was just trying to get the game over. Yeah. Like, let's just turn the page on this one. Yeah, because the Cardinals just rolled them. And I've said it, but the Cardinals are my fun watch. They're fun. They're a very fun watch. Kyler Murray, when he's healthy, is so much fun to watch. And that loss at the Bills week one looks like maybe the best loss of the year so far. That was a fun watch. It was a great loss. Yeah. And it was a fun game. And you didn't have to show Marvin Harrison. Yeah.

You knew they were going to get him. Save it for week two. Yeah. And then speaking of fun watches, the opposite of that was Steelers Broncos. Yeah. I feel like the Steelers are like that every year. Yeah. Not a fun watch, but they win. But then you add in Bo Nix. Yeah. Who has struggled. Still time, but...

Yeah, it was tough to watch. Justin Fields was good for a half. Yeah. What was his first half? I think he had like 100 yards in the first half and then ended with 117. Yeah, they just ran the ball in the second half. They didn't even really look like they wanted to score at all. Yeah, and their defense is so good, and you knew going into this game that Bo Nix would be in trouble. Sean Payton gets the double whammy of what the fuck are you doing where he kicked a sad field goal because the Broncos have never been shut out at home.

So that felt like he was kicking the field goal for that specific reason. That one came... Let's see. It was 10 minutes left. Or sorry. Yeah, it was 10 minutes left in the fourth quarter down 13 to nothing. They kicked a field goal. Yep. And then...

I guess because he kicked that first field goal, he did have to kick the second field goal. And then with, what, two minutes left, 154 left, he kicked it deep. He did not do an onside kick. Yeah, so he only likes to surprise onside kicks. Yeah. There's somebody out there online, Jacob Sanderson, wrote this up pretty good, I think. He said, Sean Payton made me suffer today. I'm going to make you suffer with me. So this spells out pretty good. Sean Payton had four possessions that reached or began in the fourth quarter today, starting down 13 to nothing.

On possession one, Payton passed up a fourth and six from the 16 with 1045 remaining in favor of field goal to make it 13 to three. In exchange for giving up the ball, his team went from needing two touchdowns to needing two touchdowns.

Fortunately for Payton, he did get the ball back, but this time he chose to punt on 4th and 8th from the 33 with 7.57 remaining, locking himself into a best-case scenario of getting the ball back with about 5.5 minutes remaining down two possessions. Again, he needed his defense to either stop punting or missing on 4th down, so Payton decided on the second straight possession that being down 10 instead of 13 was

was worth not having the ball and losing two plus minutes of the game on possession three Peyton faced a fourth and five at the 11 with 155 remaining once again he chose the path of the foot making it 13 to 6 and forgoing a chance to play to win regulation and to need only a field goal on his potential next drive

So Sean Payton was playing extend the game until the game ended. It's crazy. So extend the game works if you end up extending the game enough to win the game. But if you lose all that time by trying to extend the game, you're actually shortening the game. It felt like Sean Payton has a secret clause in his contract, uh,

Who's the Walton family? The Walton family. Yeah, the Waltons gave him a special clause in his contract being like, it doesn't matter wins and losses. We just need to have the ball with a chance to tie. Yeah. And that's how he played the game because they did actually get the ball back with nine seconds left. People watched the game. And a chance to tie. You know what? If people are watching on TV all the way through the fourth quarter, that's good for business. Yeah.

That's good rating. Some Jerry Reinsdorf shit. You can sell advertising in the fourth quarter for way more than you sell it for in the first quarter. Yeah. Yeah. I guess it's smart. They also did a terrible towel knockoff giveaway at the game today, which I feel like teams are over lifetime when they play the Steelers and they try to do their own terrible towel giveaway. Yeah. Because what they try to do is they try to drown out the towels in the stadium with their own home team towels. And you don't piss off the terrible towel. No. You just don't do that. No.

It was bad. Steelers are well ahead of schedule for their 8-9 or 9-8, it feels like. So, Russie is still out. He was inactive, but also the emergency quarterback. Again. Again today.

Jussie's 2-0. Jussie's 2-0. Do you stick with Jussie? I think you got to go Russie. You think you go Russie? I think you got to go Russie at this point because if you go Jussie again, you're essentially playing a game of Russian Justin roulette, I guess, with him because if you put Justin back in, eventually he will have...

good game that they win because of him and if that happens before he has his bad game then you got to keep going with Justin yeah at that point you can't switch to Rusty right now Justin has played poorly enough where you can make that switch right now yeah and then maybe if Russell Wilson struggles then you put Justin in yeah so I think you got to go back and then maybe you go back again yeah switch back and forth yeah and there's also there's always one play in every Steelers game it happens every week where they run like an outside stretch play and

the Steelers defense and they don't block TJ Watt. Yeah. And it's always a four yard loss. And every week TJ Watt makes a tackle easily in the backfield on the running back. Yeah. And it almost gives him like a freebie that just gets him even more juiced up. But why does every single team run that play? I don't know. He's such a monster. He is a monster. He's an absolute monster. Yeah. Their defense looks awesome. I have a Bo Nix stat for you. Oh no. Bo Nix is 11 of 36 for 212 yards and 4.5

Picks on passes that are more than 5 yards downfield So more than 5 yards downfield 11 for 36 4 interceptions on those Not very good And he is like He's treated like a coach's son Sean Payton looks at him like he's his son Yeah Whatever was in that backpack We gotta know Famous backpack Alright last game before we do Who's back a week We'll talk a little Monday Night Football as well

the Texans 19, the Bears 13. What would you, Hank, I'll let you decide. What would you like me to do first? You want me to get as negative as I've been getting in the last, I don't know, 45 minutes that we've been taping and talking about other games? Or you want me to do what is trying to be a reasonable, stop laughing memes. Memes, you deleted everything on your phone.

I haven't done that. Listen, we all deal with losses poorly here. I think that we've learned. If we learn anything from this podcast, we all are not great when our teams lose. Would you like me to get really, really dark, really, really negative or the calm, easy, like it's going to be okay?

Let's get dark first and then do the calm at the end and then move on. Okay, so the dark is Cale Williams is going to get murdered. He's going to get killed behind this offensive line. And I don't know how this offensive line is so, so bad, and we just completely ignored it. It's the old meme, you know, Panay Sewell blocking, throw it to literally anyone, Jamar Chase is in completion. He is going to get killed. He got, I think there was, what was the stat?

He got pressured, and he did not play well. I want that on the record. He did not play well. He played well for a half. I thought his first half was very good. It was better. What did he do in that face? What was that face? Well. He played okay. I thought he played very well in the first half. Sunday night football, first start on the road in the NFL. He played well in the first half. He did not play well in the second half. Still doesn't have a touchdown. Yeah, that's fine. Those things kind of take some time. Okay, Max? Yeah.

What was the stat? I'm going to find it. 36 pressures on 42 pass attempts for Caleb Williams tonight. And he was getting hit on every single one of them. He was getting just driven into the... He took some big shots tonight. Six times he had a semi-clean pocket. He did not play well in the second half. I do think he looked better in the first half than he did against the Titans. Calmer, hitting some guys.

He missed a lot of guys downfield. You could say that's pressure. You could also say that that's just what it is. I don't know. I just don't fucking know, okay? I don't know. It's all fucked up. It's all fucked up right now. Can I tell you something? What? Watching the game, I thought that Caleb Williams was probably the sixth or seventh biggest concern.

Yeah, I appreciate that. So I appreciate that. I appreciate that. Being honest. Name a couple. Okay. I wish we had done. I wish. So we taped the first 10 games, the recap of the first 10 games before Sunday Night Football.

If you're, you've probably already tweeted this at me, but everything we said about Brian Dable and his challenges, Matt Aberflew is a hundred million times worse. Those were two of the dumbest challenges I've ever seen. I don't know what the fuck he was doing. One was right in front of him. Right in front of him. You could see him on the sideline, watch the play clearly two feet down.

And then he challenged it because he didn't like it. And then later on challenging what the interception. Yeah. Yeah. There were no, there was zero chance. Take the flag away from him. Yeah. He shouldn't have access to that. He's lost flag privilege. He has his brain for those two challenges was no different than like my five-year-old's brain. When I watch him do something bad. And then I'm like, why'd you do that? And he's like, I didn't do that. Like you're, it was a five-year-old brain to try to convince someone that what you just, what just happened did not happen. We all saw it.

We all watched it happen in slow-mo, and then you're like, nah, fuck it. Maybe they'll just look at it and be like, no, it's totally different. So, listen, every coach kind of has that little bit of –

I guess delusion in them where they want bad things to not be true. I think a lot of people have that. It's a natural thing. Uh, what separates good coaches from bad coaches is having some sort of system that accounts for that, where you have somebody that's not as emotionally attached to what just happened. Yeah. Tell you, Hey Matt, that's a bad idea to challenge it. You're going to lose a challenge. Yeah. And Matt, don't do that. We're going to lose a timeout. They don't have that in place. That's, that's the concerning part to me. Um,

So, yeah, I'm borderline thinking, like, everything's fucked. And everything's fucked. Do you want me to do the positive? Yeah. Okay. So, boys, it's the second start. The offensive line is historically bad. People aren't talking about the fact that those two interceptions, he actually made incredible plays to extend the play and then had to throw them up, hoping something worked. And the Bears' defense is elite. The Bears' defense...

showed up tonight where they time and time again were put in very bad spots and they kept on answering the bell and kept on making big plays after big plays and the Texans are a Super Bowl contending team that they went in there and they held them to I think they had one offensive touchdown right and

Let's see. Nico Collins scored. Nico Collins scored. I think everything else was field goals. Mixon did not score. Yeah. I think it was all field goals. They were all long field goals too. Long ass. We kept them to long ass field goals. Long field goals. You held them to extremely long distance field goals. Also, you guys have a good kicker. Oh yeah. Cairo Santos, I trust 100%. Yeah. Kicking has gotten easy for everyone. But yeah, I'm in a bad spot right now. I know that this is exactly what people wanted to hear. Guess what? You got your wish. I'm in a bad spot.

I'm in a bad spot because I think that it's, I'm actually like worried that even if Caleb Williams, I still believe in Caleb Williams. I don't know if Caleb Williams will survive. Yeah. The offensive line is that bad. Yeah. The offensive line was bad on, was it the second to last play that sack that he took where Daniel Hunter just landed on him, just jumped on him like a spider monkey. He got crushed time and time again. It was all night he was getting killed. And so he's going to be very, very sore. And also the worst. You can run the ball next week.

Yeah, probably. Maybe. Hopefully. The worst part is that I think that Hank is going to be proven exactly correct that this was a huge mistake having Ibraflux come back.

Hank drafted him, though. And Shane Waldron. I don't know what the fuck's going on with the calls. It felt like every single time it was either a false start or the call came in late or Caleb didn't get it or everyone was running around. And I don't know if DJ Moore doesn't like Caleb anymore. Everything's bad, okay? Everything's bad. Yeah, what was up with him not running around? I don't know. He was tired, okay? Everyone gets tired on Sunday nights. You're tired right now. You're half asleep. Not as bad as last week. Yeah.

There has been, I think, a 75% increase in false starts in illegal formations across the league this year. It's unbearable to watch. Yeah, the play calls were getting in late. It seemed like they were up at the line of scrimmage. People were confused. Caleb knew what was supposed to happen, but he could only point and grab people so much until the clock was expiring.

It looked a little bit out of sorts, but the good news is this is the Texans. The Texans are very good and it's not as bad as some of the bears. Primetime games have been in recent history. It was pretty bad. That second half was really tough to watch. I kind of understand why memes cried. I'm going to cry. Um,

Can you guys just make me a promise that just don't call him a bust until I say he's a bust? I don't think he's a bust. I don't think he's a bust. It's only week two. It's only week two. That's the only thing that you have to say. Thank you. It's week two. We're one and one. We're one and one. I think you're like, he looked bad.

But it's only week two and he's a rookie quarterback. For a half. Stop smiling, Hank. It's true. He's doing the twerk. It's true. People are listening and they just watch that game. Caleb Williams did not look good. But it's week two of a long career. In the second half. But he didn't look like a fucking superstar. He's averaging a half of a touchdown. The offense is averaging a half of a touchdown per game right now. That's not good.

But it's only week two. That's the only thing that you got to say. It's only week two. It's only week two. You can't judge an entire guy by two weeks. Can't judge him. He's looked bad. For the second half and the whole first game. No, no, no. Bad. He's looked bad. Max, he was good in the first half.

What defines good? Compared to the Titans game. Yeah, they scored one touchdown in the first half. But he looked good in the first half. See, you guys have a wrong definition of good right now. But it was compared to last week. How are his handoffs, Max? I don't care about his handoffs. I want him to throw the ball. I want him to have time to throw the ball. Correct. And that is an issue for sure.

But let's just not sugarcoat it. That's why I don't care if Drake made a link. He looked bad in the second half. I agree. He looked very bad in the second half. He looked fine in the first. He didn't look good in the first half. He didn't have a touchdown. You can't say that a guy looked really good.

One in a whole half of football. That's not like a good half of offensive football. So we're looking to have 14 points as an offense? Max is very upset because we hold Jalen Hurts to quite a different standard on the show than anything else. No, it's just that we hold all quarterbacks to a different standard. But I understand it's a rookie, but like...

Let's call a spade a spade. I agree. I was judging his first half based on the Titans game. But that's not what you want to do. I understood baby steps. So I was basically saying compared to the Titans game, he looks like the greatest quarterback ever. Then in the second half, he looked almost worse than the Titans game. So we've gone backwards.

Week two. Two weeks. That's all. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. And the Colts defense stinks. I am not sugarcoated at all being like, Caleb looks awesome. I just thought the first half he looked... Well, PFT tried to say that the sixth most concerning thing. Yeah. It's the first. No.

Like the Bears always will be. Max, I'll give you my top six. What are you most scared about? I'll give you my top six. Future of the Bears. What are you most scared about? Offensive line and Matt Evers. You can fix offensive lines very quickly. Fixing a quarterback, not easy. Coaching? Hold on. Coaching, yes. But again. We all talked at the same time. Me and his brain is going crazy.

Offensive line is my first concern right now because it directly impacts Cale Williams' growth and health. Fair, fair, fair. That's why. The quarterback is the most important thing always. I just don't know who would have played well behind that line tonight. That's fair. I don't. And I'm not saying that he's looked good because he's not. In week one, I didn't think the offensive line looked bad, but it didn't look as bad as it did tonight. And I said Cale played really bad.

Tonight, there were times where I was like, this looks a little bit more comfortable, and then it just all went to shit. So yeah, I'm in a fucking world of hurt. All my worst fears, it's all happened faster than I ever expected, and it just sucks. Everyone's just, I think I tweeted, this fucking sucks, and maybe three minutes later, I had 550 replies, and they were all nasty.

Very nasty stuff. Very nasty. It is funny because it's like the bus meme where Big Cat's one and one. He's on the sad side of the bus. I'm one and one. I'm on the happy side of the bus. Yeah. It's just about the fact that it was a primetime game. I hate primetime games. Yeah, primetime games are mean. They're very mean to do to especially a rookie quarterback.

especially a team that has lost a lot of Sunday night football games. It's eight in a row. It's very mean. And I didn't like the bears uniform. I hate the fucking orange uniforms. I didn't like the traffic cone helmets. The best way I could describe the bears orange uniforms when they wear them is like, it looks like a seven year olds playing Madden. They're like, let me just do this combo of cool uniforms. It's bright. I like bright colors. There's just the bears have a great uniform. Why, why fuck with it? But yeah, everything's bad. Everything sucks. Caleb has not looked good pretty much at all. Uh,

Offensive line is terrible. Defense is great. So it's Bears football. We're back in the same spot. First half was okay. We really needed that pump block. Needed a pump block. Need Devin Hessler to come out of retirement. And then we might be cooking. Maybe Keenan Allen plays next week? Keenan Allen would be nice. Did you see how many chains? A lot of chains. People were saying that Keenan Allen is overweight. I think he just might weigh in wearing all his jewelry. Yeah. I think that adds like 15 pounds. This fucking sucks.

It happened so fast. It'll be okay. It's two weeks in the season. I told you this weekend was going to be shitty. Bookends. I had bookends of shit. This is a dumb sport to even be a fan of. I just want to talk about football and hang out with Jim Harbaugh. Yeah. I don't want to root for anything. No. I like to when memes...

I should do the memes thing and just delete everything. That sounds better. And I also don't like when Max is sitting and he's kind of talking down to us a little bit, which he has every right to do. Very much so. Hank always talks down to us, but we expect it. Max is trying to snap us into reality. Yeah. And it hurts. You guys are trying to get to a winning place. You're sounding like losers.

This is a hard part, PFT, where they can just do this to us. Yeah. You know, for a while. And I know you're feeling a lot better, which I understand. Well, just say those handoffs. No, but he's looked better. He's looked better. Don't patronize me. Shane Daniels has looked better. You patronized him. No, Hank, it was one handoff. It wasn't all his handoffs. And you haven't even seen it, so you're talking out of your ass. It's impossible to find. Literally impossible to find. Have any of the first-round quarterbacks thrown a touchdown pass?

I think Bo Nix may have thrown one last week. Did he? I think he threw one late. Yeah. Because this would make me feel a little bit better where it's like, dude, maybe it's just really hard right now for rookies to come into the NFL. No, he did not throw a touchdown. All right, so no rookie quarterback has thrown a touchdown yet. Wow. Well, that's good.

I think. No, I think that's good. We should see if they do. What are you shaking your head about, Max? No, yeah, I thought that he did, but I was shaking my head. Oh, he ran one. That's what I'm thinking of. He ran one. I wonder if DraftKings can do a bet next week. Oh, no, you play him on Monday night. I was going to say it would have been great if we did a race the first touchdown. Yeah, I feel like. But you get juicy odds on Jaden.

I don't know. Caleb might never throw a touchdown. I honestly think that at this point it feels like there's a force field and we're never going to get there. Chris Collinsworth even said it where he's like, they haven't really run any plays in the red zone, so they don't know what to do. I think it'll happen. It's hard not to overreact to it because he did get his ass kicked tonight. He got his ass kicked.

kicked you you got some good defense like some exploitable defenses coming up yeah and also are the Bears defense is very good it's going to keep I mean the Bears got the ball back with a chance to win the game with a minute and a half left yeah their defense is awesome what are you laughing about memes

You're fine. I'm looking at the schedule. You got a couple Colts, Rams, Panthers, Jaguars. He'll be fine. He's just got to find it. Cardinals. Yeah, the Texans are good. They're probably going to win the Super Bowl. All right, Max, let's talk Monday night. How are you feeling? Would it be a shame if you guys lost after you've been belittling us? I wasn't belittling. I just wanted to have an honest conversation.

And I think it was good. I think it was constructive. Did we not have an honest conversation? We did. I said that he was bad. No, we did. I think we had a good conversation. That's all I wanted to do. And in relation to last week, there were moments where he looked good because he was so bad. Yeah, you just got to hang on to those plays that were like, oh, that's a good play. That's a good throw. You'll go back and watch the highlights.

And you'll just like look at those plays where it's like this is a really good throw. Someone will make like an all 22 breakdown of the good plays that Caleb Williams did and then that's what you will think of going. No, no, no. They'll be a Bears guy who like

Someone make that for me, please. Someone did that for Jalen Hurts last week. Okay. So that's why I was like, oh, yeah. Someone please make that for me. The picks weren't his fault. All good ones. Please make that for me. All right. So, Max, real quick. DraftKings, they're dishing out an NFL no-sweat touchdown bet for all customers. Opt in, get your no-sweat token, and place an NFL touchdown bet. If your touchdown bet doesn't hit, you'll get it back as a bonus bet. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app. Use code TAKE. That's code TAKE to get your no-sweat token tonight. Max, I'm going to ask you a question.

How are you feeling about this game? And also give us a touchdown bet. I like Jahan Dotson. A.J. Brown out. Jahan Dotson is probably going to have to fill in that role of the...

big receiver in the end zone or like an end zone guy that you need to go to to go catch a ball.

Are you nervous about this game? I'm nervous about every game. Are you going to the game? I am going to the... Hopefully I'm going to the game. But are you nervous or, like I said, scared?

uh you asked me before the sunday football that's definitely i was nervous i said scared i think we're six point favorites right now yeah so i'm definitely not scared we should win the game but we look sloppy on we we won week one against packers but weird game the field was shit and sloppy win i would love if we finished tomorrow winning by like 20 points that would be great i have a

I think defense is going to eat. I think you guys are going to get after Kirk. Kirk Cousins. That'd be great. I would love that. Yeah. He didn't look like he could really move around. I got deep into some Falcons film breakdown Twitter last week. Apparently, they're having Kirk Cousins stand with his right foot back when he gets snaps. And the entire rest of his career, he's gone left foot back. So he might be uncomfortable.

Might not be fully healed. I feel like your defensive line is going to tee off on him. I would love that. I would love that. I think you guys are going to win. I think you guys are going to win by... Easily. Do you know what jerseys you're wearing? I do not. That's kind of significant. That would be important. Because if you're wearing... You're not wearing Kelly Green, right?

No, that would be everywhere. Hopefully they're wearing black. I would like black. Okay, so yeah. Good luck. You're going to the game. Are you tailgating? Kind of. Yeah, kind of. Yes. Are people going to be...

I mean, you're the king of Philly. You're going to get... People are going to be like, Max, Max, Max. I can't find my flight info right now. Oh, no. That's kind of stressful. Is that why you said you might be going? Yeah. What do you mean you can't find your flight info? It was, like, booked for me, and there's no, like, confirmation. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. Okay. Find your flight, and then you're going to the game. Yeah. Yeah. No. I got to figure that out. Be a real shame. Also an early flight.

Hank is such a fucker. This is the bullshit about Hank, though, is that he's so removed where it's like, I lose a game, memes loses a game. Max, if you lose Monday night, it's like ruined your week. Oh, that would be, yeah. Hank, it doesn't matter to him. That would be a sad fight. He's great. He can just fucking just sit up in his tower and just- Count the banners. Oh, Dylan Rayl is cool and-

Count the banners and just fucking chirp at us. Because Hank has the reassurance of the universe that eventually things will swing back in his favor. We don't have that same luxury. No. We have to trick ourselves into thinking that it's happening right now for us all the time. And he just won an NBA final. We have the reverse luxury. That's the worst part is that he just won his number one championship. Here's the harsh reality that me and Big Cat have to live with, okay? When you have a quarterback, when he releases a pass,

We feel an impending sense of doom every single time. I yearn to have a quarterback that when the ball comes off their hands, I get excited. And I'm like, something good is going to happen to me. But until I get enough of that positive reinforcement for the rest of my life, I will just be thinking something bad is about to happen every time we attempt to pass. I don't want proven otherwise. I don't remember the last time I watched a quarterback for one of my teams drop back in a clean pocket and

like perfect five-step drop, step up, like 30-yard dime down the middle of the field, the guy's wide open. Yeah. I don't even know what that looks like. And I do mean earnestly, like I want for you guys what I've been able to experience.

But we are the reverse. But I can't sit here as you guys try and justify these terrible games and be like, oh, everything's great. You also have to be real. I never said everything's great. Realistic. Show me where I said everything's great. Never said everything's great. I'll take nine Super Bowls. You take three. Well, that was exciting. We have the exact reverse where he knows that everything will work out for him.

We know no matter what happens, we'll just end up back in square one. Yeah. I'm literally at square one where the Bears defense is elite and everything else sucks. Square one. It's just nice to be able to not really care. I was saying this earlier. Right now, it's gross, but things are turning out very similar. Everything. The Patriots look kind of good. The Bears and Commanders both look pretty bad. The Eagles look good, but like...

Not good at the same time The Jets are the Jets The Jets are the Jets The Jets are pretty hard I mean that is the truth Memes The Jets are the Jets We're the best The only big winner is Shane Shane owns the podcast Shane's a Chargers fan He owns the podcast And it's because he's got Harbaugh Yeah

All right, let's finish up the show. We got Who's Back of the Week. PFT, you're going to do a quick ad before we go to Who's Back of the Week. Before we get to Who's Back of the Week, it's brought to you by Coors Light. College football is never short on intrigue, especially when they're iconic rivals, but you can add to the excitement on Saturdays. Coors Light teamed up with DraftKings for the free-to-play college football pick-em-pools where you pick winners for a chance to win big.

When the rivalries heat up, it's time to choose chill and then reach for an ice-cold Coors Light. When you're looking to keep it chill, there's only one beer to choose. That's Coors Light. The mountains on the bottles and cans even turn blue when your beer is cold. Coors Light is mountain-cold refreshment. Coors Light is cold-loggered, cold-filtered, cold-packaged. I drank a Coors Light yesterday. I was watching some football outdoors yesterday.

And I was watching TV and drinking an ice cold Coors Light. The mountain was so blue. It may have been the bluest mountain I've seen. When the college football rivalries that you're watching heat up, for example, like the Apple Cup, Hank was locked in and joined a Coors Light during the Apple Cup. Choose chill with Coors Light and DraftKings. Get Coors Light delivered straight to your door with Instacart by going to CoorsLight.com slash take 20%.

21 and over eligibility restrictions apply. Void where prohibited. See terms at DraftKings.com slash Coors Light Pick'em. Celebrate responsibly. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. Okay, Hank, who's back of the week? Lay it on us. Who's back of the week is the Sphere. Yes. UFC at the Sphere. I feel like that's going to be the future of UFC. I think it should be the future of all sports. Yeah.

Basketball game at the Sphere That's where the NBA Cup The finals should be held in the Sphere It looks so sick Every time I see the Sphere I'm like why do I not just live there Why don't I just figure out a way to get a job at the Sphere

I don't think you could do basketball, but that would be insane. Why not? Yeah, why not? It's definitely big enough. Would it distract the players? I guess maybe not. I don't know. Honestly, who cares? No, you could probably black out the... Because, like, the one-on-one aspect of fighting, it's like, yeah, you have to focus on the guy in front of you because he's literally trying to choke you out. Basketball...

You're moving, you're looking around, there's a little more moving pieces, but it would be unbelievable. Yeah, it'd be great. You could do the first half and have the sphere light up like it was one team's home arena, and then second half, have it be the other team's. I'll watch any event that they have there. Yeah. How big is it? Could they do a football game in there? You've been. I haven't. No. No football in the sphere? Probably not. We've got to build a bigger sphere. Yeah. We do need a bigger sphere. It looked awesome.

Were the fights good? I missed it. Sugar Sean lost. Oh. There was maybe one of the gnarliest cuts I've ever seen. Oh, I saw that. Yes. That fighter. Yes. Forehead was split open. I saw that. Also, shout out our guy Robbie Fox. Yeah. Broke news on Friday night. Did you see that, Hank? I did. Okay. He broke news that Michael Chandler is going to fight in a fight with

before he potentially fights Conor McGregor. So it's going to be Michael Chandler, Conor McGregor. Michael Chandler's sick of waiting for Conor McGregor. Well, I think they're UFC. Michael Chandler, our good friend. McGregor. What? They're like holding him out. Why? Because he has two fights left on his deal, and then once his deal's done, then he can obviously make another deal. So UFC is delaying him so he can't do that. Do you think it might also be that Conor McGregor really likes to party? Yes. Because... Probably somewhere in the middle. Yeah.

I don't know how that guy keeps going on camera, zooted out of his mind. Yeah. Allegedly. Just stop going live, Connor. He's so paranoid to just be on TV on the moon. You know, there's great breaking news about Robbie. He also got Dana gave him $20,000 for his wedding. Yeah. Well, no. Robbie won it. Tunnel of chaos. Yeah, tunnel of chaos. Tunnel of chaos happens. Yeah. Tunnel of chaos. I want to go back to the tunnel of chaos. Me too. Yeah.

The Bears don't lose in the tunnel of chaos. At the Sphere, they could definitely set up like 10 TVs, right? You could watch 10 NFL football games at the same time in the Sphere on a Sunday? Yeah.

They should do that. They should do that. That would be sick. All right, PFT, your who's back. My who's back of the week is bands getting into fights on stage. Yeah. Jane's Addiction got into a little fracas. I think that was Friday night. Yep. Perry Farrell went after Dave Navarro as the song ended through maybe the wimpiest, least intimidating punch of all time when he punched him off. I guess they've kind of been like,

Biting at each other's heels for a while Peripheral's been a dick on stage a few times I didn't actually know that Jane's Addiction was still a band Yeah I didn't either I just thought that Dave Navarro His full time job Was just being cool with tattoos on TV Yeah I thought that's what he got paid for And also being married to Carmen Electra Are they still married? No For like a year Yeah That was awesome She was She was 1-1 for a little bit Yeah Long time She was great For me

Well, it was like her and Pam were like Sosa and McGuire. So I liked Pam. But yeah. Both good. Yeah. Both really good. Starsky and Hutch, elite. Yeah. Sneaky. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, they got into a fight and it looks like the band's breaking up now. Damn. So maybe they took the bullet for Oasis. Maybe Oasis is going to be just fine. Yeah. I think you and Rowan are going to do that this weekend.

That's a good point. I should try to fight Roan on stage. Yeah. In Austin. It'll go viral. Yeah. That would be awesome. We are playing in Austin on Friday night. Free show. West 6th Street. Hell yes. Come out. Check it out. Pup Punk. Excited to be back in Austin. I'm going to eat so many breakfast tacos. Love that. Put it on your Mount Rushmore. Drink a couple margaritas. All right. My who's back. We talked about it earlier, but I got to pick a pinky team. So let's do it. Right now? Yeah. I thought you were going to wait until Wednesday. No. We got to do it right now.

We have 0-2 teams. The Falcons weren't. Were the Falcons. Could the Falcons be in there? They could. No. Yeah. If you're doing it right now, no. No, but if the Falcons lose Monday night, then the Falcons are 0-2. The Falcons are going to lose Monday night. All right. So I think. Don't say that. What I'm going to do is I'm going to, for the first time ever, I'm going to put three teams in a hat and I'll just pick them out. Is that fair? Yeah. So. Lottery ball?

Oh, lottery ball. Okay. We do lottery ball. I am not going to pick the Cincinnati Bengals, I believe, and Joe Burrow. That would be disrespectful to Joe Burrow. I think the three teams are the Baltimore Ravens. Yeah. Again, by the way, I just wanted to clear. It's going to be from the, like, right here up. The tip of my pinky.

So are you going to go to the joint? No. Where's the joint? Here? No, it's going to be like half of my nail. Got it. Yeah. But also the flesh. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I still don't really know. Wherever the bone, I still don't know you legally can do this. Are you going to take off bone? I'm going to not take off bone. Where's the bone start? I don't think that's possible. I think you would have to take off. I'm going to take off some bone. Because if you take off just, does that regenerate?

I don't know. I don't like talking about it. I think you just go full line. No, Hank, I'm not going... No, you can't go full line. It's a pinky bend. The nail would also fucking hurt. The nail would hurt. Yeah. All right, well, I'll consult a doctor, but it's not... I have the right to go half nail up. If a doctor's like, hey, man, just go to the line or just take the whole thing, I'll just do that. Either way...

Every year, I pick a pinky team. They're not going to win the Super Bowl. This team is not going to win the Super Bowl. I believe they're not going to win the Super Bowl. Don't do the Ravens. Don't do the Ravens. Why? The Ravens could win the Super Bowl. I don't know if they can. Their offensive line is bad. What are the other two teams? Well, I was going to do Ravens, Falcons, and Rams. What? Rams and Ravens would be scary. You think so? No, Ravens is scary. I mean, the Rams, they just got their ass kicked today. Yeah.

All right. I should just pick the team that I think is not going to win the Super Bowl. Yes. I don't know why you're like. You're right. Because what PFT got in my head. This is like amputating part of your body. I know. The whole point of this was that it's a team I confidently think will never win the Super Bowl this year. The reason I told you won't when it came to the Ravens is because the Ravens definitely have a chance to win the Super Bowl.

Correct. And I was just trying to... I don't want this to happen. I know, it's getting reversed in everyone's head where they want me to pick a team that can definitely win the Super Bowl. It's like, no, the whole point of it was that it started with the Texans that one year where I was like, the Texans aren't winning the Super Bowl. Cut off the tip of my pinky if they do. Then they went on this crazy run and got to the playoffs. But I still was right and I still believed in it. Okay, so I think I know Big Cat pretty well.

I'm translating his brain. He does think that the Ravens could win the Super Bowl. Correct. So it would actually be against what this pick is. He does not think that the Rams can win the Super Bowl. I do not think the Rams can win the Super Bowl. You're very sure that the Rams can win the Super Bowl. I guarantee the Falcons don't win the Super Bowl. Just pick the Rams. Rams or Falcons to me. But the Falcons are not 2-0. They're not 0-2 yet. Yeah, they are. No, they're not. Yeah, they're 0-2. You guys got this, Max. I hate this.

All right, final say. I'm going to take the Falcons. If the Falcons somehow win this game on Monday night, I have to also have the Rams. That's fair. So you'll have two. I'll have two. I'll have two. That's fair. So you're big on the— You're an Eagles fan tomorrow. Yeah, yeah. The Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. Yeah. Like, they're not. They're the Falcons. You guys agree? Well, just because of the fact that they're the Falcons. They could have—

You could switch their uniforms with the Chiefs, and you'd be like, well, no, they're not winning the Super Bowl because they're the Falcons. Yeah. Let me look at the Rams schedule. I could never see the Falcons winning the Super Bowl. Well, you could see them winning a Super Bowl during the Super Bowl. No. In the process of winning it. When you're up 28-3, is one team winning? Winning in the Super Bowl. The Falcons, at one point, were winning the Super Bowl.

This is really stupid that I do this anyway because eventually I'm going to have to do this. Yeah, Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. Guaranteed. Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. I believe it. End the season. But if they win on Monday night, then it's two rounds. Then I have to take the Rams. Yep. Tip of the pinky. Anything else? Do you have a who's back, Max? Oh, I do want to say who's back of the week. I'm so, so, so excited for playoff baseball.

Yeah. That's not back yet. Yeah, but I can feel your anxiety and I'm excited to... Nothing makes me more anxious than playoff baseball. I know. Nothing. Because it's the most... I mean, playoff hockey, yes. But playoff baseball, I think, is just a different piece that... Playoff hockey, things happen so fast that you can't even register it. Playoff baseball, you just sit there and you're like...

Well, here we go. Like another pitch, another, you just have so much downtime to like, let it all wash over. Every pitch feels like 20 minutes. Should we all bet on the Phillies with him? I bet on the Padres, but I can also sprinkle on the Phillies. I'm going to bet on the Phillies with you. Why can't I, can I do that? Sure. I mean, Dave's already on the Phillies, so it doesn't matter at this point. Yeah. All right. Maybe I'll just watch.

I'll just bet them game to game. I'm on the pods as well. You are? Yeah, let's go. So what's the number? Well, I had that. It's the first time winner from like. Oh, I forgot about that. I put it in forever ago. But remember, he did that bet. What team to win the World Series for the first time? Are the Brewers in the playoffs? Yes. So Brewers pods.

Did the Brewers just clinch? They might have. The Cubs just kept on losing games. Because Rockies, Mariners, and Rays are not in it. Correct. So Brewers or pods. Yeah. What were the odds on that one? Plus 900. All right. Good luck. It's pretty good. That's going to be great. That's going to be fun. Shane, congrats on 2-0. You're the king of the podcast. Also, Max. Max is 2-0. Yeah, Max is 2-0. And I have the Falcons. Stop it. All right. Good show, boys. We'll talk college football on Wednesday.

Numbers. 9. 3. 8. 20. Did you not pick a number yet? Wait, what number did you pick, Big Cat? I haven't. Oh. 3. 56. I don't understand why you keep doing the number thing with me. I already won. Yeah, I don't either. I don't know why I'm doing it either. I have no idea. Congrats on the win, Puck. There's a number. There's a ball up there. There's a ball up there. What number would that have been? It would have been 83. What...

Congrats on what win for Pug? Eagles. Oh, yeah. You guys are jerks. It comes from a place of pain. You get that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's pain. All right, numbers. Say it again. Three. 29. 56. 97. 21.

20? Yep. Bang. Damn it. It really, at this point, I don't really know what to do. Love you guys. Because I'm just a winner. Love you guys. I'm just a winner. 20, bang. I'm specifically just a winner. Love you guys. Congrats, Max. Yep. Congratulations, Maxwell.