How We Manage Our Mental Health and Anxiety
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What's up you guys welcome back to another episode i am sam and i'm taylor today we're gonna do a mental health themed episode a little moment of just like how we manage our mental health and just chit chat about it yeah honestly straight chit chat like no cap like we have no script for this one but i feel like you'd go on like a really long tangent because over the last two years i feel like i've learned so much about mental health hundred percent it's been a roller coaster

2019 to now, what is that? Four years? Four years going on five of me going from the depths of the worst mental health I've ever had to getting better and then going back into the worst mental health I've ever had to getting better again. And in the four years, this has been the longest stretch. 2023 has been the longest stretch for

of good. Knock on wood. And if you're here from like- Mac just freaked out. I know. Mac's sitting on my lap, guys. He's been doing so good the last few episodes. He's been sitting on my lap. I love it. But if you've been here from like literally the jump and if you were to listen to like podcast episode one to now, like the growth we've had, not only in our independent, like not independent, but like, yeah,

yeah i guess independence confidence and just overall like being able to manage everything which increased leads me i was gonna like totally have this conversation with you off mic but like now we're here and i just like don't forget we're not gonna have the full conversation but i just want to like throw out little ideas you know because i also want your guys's input like i feel like as we do things as a podcast like your guys's opinions is like

more valuable than ours. No, literally no. So I would rather kind of have this be an open-ended business discussion with you guys too. No, I'm kidding. But like pop off in the comments. I feel like, you know, we did one rebrand with our art. Yeah. I feel like this podcast needs another...

really like it needs a new season of its life i 1000 season of its life like we need i just don't resonate like i don't resonate with this sign like i don't resonate and like i need us to like i think we need to like 180 this shit i know and i'm so happy you're saying this because we definitely do but we'll talk about this off mic but like let me know guys i feel under pressure no like no but just like let us know guys like do you catch our vibe like because if you were here in the beginning like we're just not those girls yeah and you guys are growing with us

So just like let us know like what do you like that we talk about? What are your favorite parts? What are things that you think would be a good segment? Like what do you hear us talk about that you like?

want more that you want us to talk about more that you kind of listen to us for let us know like let us know what you kind of want from us as listeners yeah i agree bring it to us i'll put it you know what i'll do after this we'll actually friday when it goes live i will put like a submission thing because you know on like instagram you can do the submission things but it's like the small little box it's like one sentence i'll do like an actual submission thing yeah so people you guys can leave like

an in-depth thing on like what you want to say to us. Yeah, so follow us on Instagram. This is all just a shameless plug to follow us on Instagram. Follow us on Instagram. The Instagram has also been rebranding as well. Exactly. I feel like it's just like

It's more of like our life has rebranded. That's the other thing. Like my life has rebranded. Like now I work like you're like working on something so excited, like so exciting. Like our life is rebranded. We have boyfriends now. Like actually speaking of that, I did go touring today. One of the locations had like a little like podcast studio in it. Did it? Yeah.

It was like already set up. Like there was like chairs and shit. And I was like, oh my God, that's so cool. Yeah, I know. But anyway, we'll get into that later. That is so cool. Yeah, we'll talk about that. But that's cool to know. I know. But anyways, make sure to follow us on Instagram because that's where we post things related to this show when we do Q&As, when we have like really cute graphics that are really reshareable. Yeah.

all those things so make sure to follow us on instagram but let's talk about us yeah we talk about the podcast before we talk about the podcast this is the podcast before we talk about the um subject yeah i mean where we kind of left off you and i was obviously last wednesday i was still in the bahamas so i didn't get back until friday which i mean that was what three days in the bahamas i was so sad everyone says you know the one thing you got to do in the bahamas is go swim with the pigs

The whole island was closed. I don't know why, but it was closed the week I was there. So I didn't even get to swim with the pigs. And that was the one thing I wanted to do while I was there. That's so sad for you. I know. But I mean, I still had fun. I didn't gamble.

I don't that's just not my thing and like people were getting not like mad but like guys or people were making comments on my Snapchat like why aren't you gambling in the casino? It's like I just don't want to put my money there So I don't care to get up or get down a few hundred dollars. Like it's just not my thing Yeah, I think I would do it like once and like not go over a certain limit but I have no desire to spend all my money like

gambling it away when I can just go buy clothes that I want. My brothers were up like 800 bucks. And it's like, if I was up 800 dollars, I would leave. And I can get out and get like addicting in the sense of like, but I can go up even more and more and more. No. Like they went, they left the trip calling them out right now. Like they went down

in debt like a few hundred i'm like day one you were up 800 how did you manage to lose the 800 and then go in debt yeah no it's just not for me i've never been to a casino um so like don't quote me on me saying that it's not for me because maybe i'll go on a trip near a casino and come back and tell you guys that i lost 500 because i've never actually been um so i guess we'll have to see when you know push comes to shove and i'm in the situation but

outsider looking in i don't think i would lose money yeah i mean i would lose money i mean okay would i lose money like maybe can we like clip this in like a few years when we're at the casino a lot of money okay like i think i would lose like okay like could i lose money yeah like i could like put 100 bucks in and lose it on like first go and then like that would suck yeah like

I have no desire to be there for like ever. Like I feel like I'd play one game and I'm like... No, yeah. People are like... When I was like walking around the casino, there was like certain areas of people that were constantly in that same spot. That's what they do. And it would be like 9 in the morning and I'm going to get my Starbucks coffee and there's like a man sitting at like the blackjack table at 9 in the morning. And then at 9 p.m. at night, same guy sitting in the same chair. Just know if I'm ever like...

doing a bunch of gambling i'm in my bag and i'm rich yeah just know i'm doing well yeah no yeah i mean it's definitely like an interesting world like people are so into it like i here's the thing like you know like even when we play like like cards with our friends yeah monopoly or something two games in i'm done i'm bored i don't want to play anymore people are like another round i'm like i just like can't picture myself sitting at a table with cards and

and playing yeah playing playing no fuck that fuck that i would rather go buy clothes the good thing about it though is like you do get not a free drink because you are really putting mad money down on the table but like right because they're just funneling you alcohol you keep betting money but you got three free drinks in it you spent 500 bucks exactly um

I think we talked about this on the episode last week. Yeah, we did. Because I was saying how, like, my brothers were, like, drinking their drinking and drop. Yeah, I can't remember what we talked about on the mic and what we talked about in person. Yeah, I mean, the rest of the time in Bahamas, I can't freaking speak, was fine. We went to a steakhouse the last night, but I didn't want to get steak. As you guys know, I'm, like, started to ease into eating red meat again, but I just, like...

What if I don't like it? And I just spent like $80 on a little piece of steak. I was like, you know what? I'm just going to get some fish. And then we like ran around the resort just getting drunk on the last night. And then it was time to go home, which on my flight home, my boyfriend was supposed to pick me up at the airport. And as I'm landing, he sends me this text of, oh, my God, my car died. Keep in mind, it's like midnight.

So I'm like expecting him to pick me up. I'm like, fuck. I had like 10 texts from him and he goes, nevermind. Just kidding. Got a new car. I'm like thinking to myself, new car? What the fuck are you talking about? I guess he was at a pregame with all our friends before they all went out. He was just hanging out with all of them. And as they left, he was getting into his car to come pick me up. His car was dead. And so one of like our girlfriends was like, just use my car. Like go pick me up and like,

go pick her up in my car so he took like a random car to the airport and there is nothing worse than getting picked up at an airport and not knowing what card is like in the pitch black too it's like night time and i'm like i'm like on the phone with him i'm like getting anxious i'm like can you just flash your headlights please like i don't know where you are but then he ended up obviously picking me up and then we kind of hung out for a while just catching up i don't think i went to bed until like 2 33.

On Friday night? Friday night was really fun for me. I went out but did my favorite way of going out. I got cute, nice drinks at a bunch of different bars on East. Just bar hopped with my boyfriend and his friends. He was just kind of like, we're going to dinner with these people and bar hopping. I was like, okay.

And it started out small group and like slowly got more people. And guys, the craziest like realization happened after this. And it's so funny because I it's like someone I'm going to see more often. And it was just the craziest thing. So we meet up with these people and I hope they don't listen to this. They definitely won't. But like.

I guess my life is online. So there's a possibility that they might like see me post. If they're already like 15 minutes deep into our podcast and that's like, I know, but I see like how I could get nosy and like pop into someone's things, but they probably won't. Um,

this was the fucking craziest thing ever so we meet up with these two people that are friends and they're friends so someone we've never met and the whole time i'm thinking this girl's the most familiar looking person i've ever seen in my life but there was no reason i would know her she's from boston moved here like but i was even thinking like is this someone sam has ever told me she knows because she's from boston like i know this chick like this girl's someone that i know but i just kind of let it go whatever i thought i was wrong i have

I couldn't think of anything that I would know her from. And then I'm digging because like I see her Instagram. So I'm like, maybe she has TikTok followers and I've seen the TikTok or two or something. And yeah,

Then it finally comes up. She was on this reality TV show, this lifetime reality TV show. I don't want to put on blast exactly who it is. Maybe you guys can figure it out. I'll just like be a troll and like not tell you guys because like I'm this is someone I'm probably going to see like a decent amount. I just don't like put it on blast. But like on the show, she was like the biggest villain ever. That's how I remembered her because there's a million other people on the show that I wouldn't recognize. But she was the biggest villain on the show ever.

literally awful so I called my sister that also watched it I'm like do you remember so and so and she is just like oh my god you mean the girl that was so mean I'm like yeah I know her so it's just like so crazy and like random and that sucks to have that kind of like image on reality TV like when I tell you this was she like that in person I mean no but it's hard because it was like I mean no it was a

No, but it was like a romantic setting on the TV. So it's like I wouldn't see how I'd be in a position. Like a villain with love? Yeah, like... Give me an example because I'm not someone that has watched this. So on the show there's a group of girls and guys. And all the girls meet each other and talk too. And she gets along with the girls, but she was so rude to her partner. And even to the... So rude, so mean. Like...

Whatever. I don't know exactly why. Producers just seem like they did a good job at making her look bad. No? She was bad? Yeah. Oh. I don't really think it was producer. I don't really think it was producer. And that's really unfortunate. But I don't care. I'm not going to hang out with her. I'm not going to not be nice to her because she was rude on a show. Yeah, she gets...

that's not my business but um it was just really really funny so of course i had to go back and watch it and like watch it and even my boyfriend was like i think this is worse than i thought it was gonna be because like when i showed him i'm like wasn't it bad he was like yeah it's really bad i'm like yeah i know um but so it's just super hilarious and it's literally i think i'm going all his friends are going to fredericksburg for her birthday

Like that's why but they're like doing a weekend in Fredericksburg I was like oh yeah I want to go because I've been wanting to go there and go to the winery So I'm like I'll go for a weekend 100% When is it? End of September And I'm like holy shit I'm like this is literally too much So like I don't know if it's something I assume like it's something she does want people to know about Because I wouldn't Oh no yeah Because it was awful So I don't know I'm like I wonder what I can secretly like or hint at saying So it's like I think I know like

Like, I'm not just going to ask. Just ask her, like... Like, you look so familiar. Have you talked to her about where she's from? Like, how she moved from Boston? I'll dig. I'll dig. I'll dig. I'll dig. Like, what do you do for work? Oh, what were you doing in Boston? I'll dig. Yeah. Yeah.

It's a fun game. No, because I'm not going to flat out ask. If she had a good experience on the show, I'd be like, oh my god, I saw you on the show. If I was her, I would be literally, I would have moved to Mexico and changed my name if that's how I left on TV. Maybe that's what she's trying to do. Maybe. She just hasn't gone to the DMV yet to change her name. So true. She's working on it. So true, maybe. Yeah. So true. But anyway, so I had a really fun night on Friday, but I got home early because I wanted to get home before you got there. Dude, earlier than me. I wanted, well, I left a key for you.

um but i was saying i wanted to get home before you and then my boyfriend's like we probably won't and i'm like but i want to so i left to key anyways then we got back early and i was like hell yeah um i really wanted to i was so set on getting home early because i was in that i was really trying to tell myself because we went to latchkey because they wanted to go but it's fucking hot in there it's

I had to just remind myself, like, it's not worth it to be here. I didn't want to drink more. Like, I literally got, like, one beer there. Like, I didn't drink there. Dude, the drinks... I've realized the drinks at Latchkey are so weak. I haven't. Dude, Saturday night at fucking Bull and Bull, I had three drinks, and I was, like, way more drunk than I would be if I was at Latchkey with three drinks. Yeah, I mean, at Latchkey, we do get, like, a lot of drinks. I feel like I don't. I get, like... Usually, I feel like...

I don't know. We're like pretty drunk at Latchkey. I'm drunk before I get there though. So true. So true. But anyways, like I was like, I want to go home because my new thing is showering when I get home. And that girl Jordan, she went to like Alabama or something. She made a TikTok and was like, if you're not showering after the bars, what are you doing? I saw that. And I was like, bitch, ain't nobody got time for that.

If I get home from the bar and I have the slightest bit of energy where I'm not passed out, taking a shower is my new thing. I feel like a million dollars. Yeah. Take a shower. Go to bed. You wake up. Still feel grimy because you just still do. Because I'm not going to wash my hair, okay? I'm not crazy. In her video, she had a towel over her head and her hair was wet. That's insane. I'm not insane. I can't sleep with wet hair. Just a little rinse off. Boo.

Boom, good to go. Wake up the next day, feel a million dollars. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Of course, on the show, we talk a lot about mental health and we even have done whole episodes about therapy. And if you are going through something where you feel just uncertain or you don't know if you're taking the right path, therapy can be the right thing for you. Whatever it is, therapy can help you map out your future and trust yourself to find the way forward. I have benefited from therapy before when I was going through a tough time, but you don't actually have to wait

For anything tough to be going on in your life, you can start now to learn positive, helpful coping skills and how to set boundaries to empower you to be the best version of yourself. It isn't just for those who've experienced major trauma. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist anytime for no additional charge.

This is online therapy you can do from the comfort of your own home so you don't have to deal with annoying waiting rooms or driving to and from an office. You can do it literally from your bed. That's how I did my therapy. Visit betterhelp.com slash fword today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash fword.

And then you were home on Saturday, which was fun. Yeah, Saturday was kind of just like a get my life together type of day. I went to the gym with my boyfriend, oh my God, for the first time ever. How was it? I was so nervous for it because I was like, oh my God, what if he has like ego lifts? I lift more than him, like whatever it is. And...

I didn't really know what I wanted to hit. We both showed up to freaking Lifetime without headphones. I'm like, fuck, this is my worst nightmare. Lifetime with no headphones. No headphones. Commercial gym, no headphones. Like, horrible. I left them in my suitcase. I was like, fuck. Fuck. So I was like, you know what? Pop open a fucking Celsius. We're grinding. So I did a leg day and he like wanted to do upper body. So he was like coming back and forth, like working out with me and just like doing fucking everything like full body. So it was kind of like a 50% together workout thing.

and tomorrow we're actually working out together but it went well it was great he is definitely like obviously now he's my boyfriend so it makes sense that like from afar if i see him i'm like oh that's my gym crush because it's like he's obviously my boyfriend now but like yeah it's just funny because i'm like i wish i got to see him in the gym before like to see if like the sexual tension in the eyes because he kept staring at me from like afar like so far he texted me like while we were working out

He said something like super sexual. I was like, oh my god, don't do that right now. Yeah, like, bitch, I'm focused. Yeah, like, leave me alone. The first time I worked out with my boyfriend, I was so nervous. Yeah, I don't know why. And I was so awkward when I was there. Yeah, like, I don't know why. Even though, like, we had known each other really well, I was so awkward in the moment when we were there. And I feel like still even now, it's, like, not our most comfortable space to be in. Not that I'm awkward with him, but, like, it's not...

Or like full I think it's kind of like So what do you want to do? Like

What do you want to do? Like who's leading the way? Yeah. Because then you ask like when I was first there, he's like, do what you want to do. Because, you know, I'm all talk. I'm like, I'm going to turn you into a bodybuilder. Like I'm so shy. And then he's like, so what do we do? I'm like, I don't know. What do you want to do? And he's like, I thought you like little miss fitness trainer. Yeah. What are we doing? He's actually doing self promo. My squat program that I'm doing in our app, our fitness uncensored app.

12 weeks squat program so it's just the reps and sets for a squat i'm doing it he's doing it and i didn't know he was actually doing it and i'm like what are you doing he's like legs i'm on week five i'm like oh my god you're still doing it he's like yeah i'm doing it i'm like well to be fair though like i did just send him it as like a note yeah it's not like he he did not i'm like i look over he's like on he didn't pay for the app downloaded i did just send him it um

He didn't ask for it. I was just like, oh yeah, I just sent him it. But he is doing it. So he was kind of like my guinea pigs. He did like the first like two weeks. And I was like, did that make sense? Like,

that was a correct weight because there's like percentages for the weight i was like that was correct he was like yeah i was like cool love it so he's doing that yeah and i'm working out with my boyfriend tomorrow i left he's coming to lift and i'm like i'm gonna try to like convince you to like like this gym and like get a membership because all of our friends have a membership there other than him and i'm like uh-huh what the fuck it's annoying and the reason he has a lifetime membership is because he literally can go there for free his mom is a

trainer at like a location back home so he has like a free membership and like

Lift is 40 bucks. I know. Dude, men are so fucking stingy with their money. It's so annoying. I thought it was funny on your TikTok saying that you were stingy. People were saying you were calling him broke. Dude, I know. I'm like, that's not the same thing. Okay, if he... Give context to people listening because... You shouldn't need context because you should follow us on TikTok. I know. But you posted how he doesn't want to buy himself clothes. Yeah. And this comment was saying that you called him broke. Yeah. Yeah.

First of all, if he genuinely couldn't afford it, you wouldn't have made a TikTok putting him on blast for not being able to afford it. And I said at the end, he's taking me to dinner instead. You wouldn't have been calling your boyfriend broke, putting it on blast that he can't afford a...

shopping spree. Dude, someone's just mad they don't have a girlfriend buying them clothes. That's the same thing with I have a dent on the back of my car. I still have it. My windows need to get tinted. I haven't done it. Exactly. That's the comment I made back ago. That's like saying I'm broke because I don't want to put money into my car or video games. Like I bought a nice car. Yeah. Do my windows need tinted? Million percent. I'm literally not going to do it. Like 100% like men just have things that they will put their money into. Yeah.

I, for one, will not be putting money into my car. I will not be putting money into, I don't know, what the fuck, betting on sports games. Like, gambling at the casino. Literally. Like, I'm putting my money into clothes, makeup, my overall self-care. Like, that's where I put my money. But why? Because a guy doesn't want to buy clothes, he's broke. Yeah. It makes no sense. It's also little things where, like, I'm not getting my windows tinted because I don't want to go to a car place. Like, I don't like that.

He doesn't spend his weekends. I would be like, do you want to go to Zara? Yeah, I know. Do you know what I mean? Like that's... Dude, I feel like... No, like if he did come to me and be like, do you want to go shopping? I'd be like, what?

What? Excuse me? Like, it's more of like, oh, I need a shirt. I need a shirt. I need new pants. I'm like, okay, let's go. And then I make the plans and he just tags along. Right. The only reason I went shopping with my boyfriend is because his work pants got a hole in them. Yeah. And he needed new work pants. I know. So...

Just jealous men that don't have girlfriends. Shut up. Also, just the thought that you would blast your boyfriend for not being able to afford a shirt. Why would you post that? My boyfriend's broke. Like, what? Anyways, speaking of our broke boyfriends, Saturday night we all had ourselves a night. It was very fun. Yeah, it was fun. I spent the day, obviously, just regrouping, going grocery shopping, cooking, whatever. Then Saturday night,

We went to this place called Bull and Bull that has arcade games everywhere right around sunset, which Taylor and I took the opportunity to go take some photos and TikToks on the balcony that overlooks the downtown strip.

It was gorgeous. And the boys were inside playing pool. But we got Aperol Spritz. Best Aperol Spritz I have had. It was really good. It was so fucking good. And I purposely went back every single time to get a new Aperol Spritz because I got three while we were there from the same bartender because I was like, I don't want to fuck this up. It was real good. Like it might have been just the bartender. It wasn't even...

the bar itself it was just the bartender it was real good i like the lucky duck ones too but it was it was see i've yet to have a lucky duck one i need to get one from there because i well actually that's such a lie because if i'm going to lucky duck i'm getting an espresso martini yeah but sometimes you don't want to that's facts that's so facts fuck i miss lucky duck damn it but they're good there but the apparel sprints were very good we played some pool hung around i was way too like

Not like drunk but I was buzzing hard to be playing pool. I was feeling pretty good in my pool skills and I'd like make like I made like three in a row and I look up at my boyfriend I'm like was I hot? I was like am I so hot? It's the hottest you've ever seen me being good at pool. Yeah.

But it was fun, and we kind of, like, one of our friends, like, was, like, fourth-wheeling, but barely. Dude, I know. But I didn't even really, like... I know, but the thing is, he doesn't care about that. I was literally telling that to my boyfriend. I was like, I think it's so cute and awesome that, like, this one friend of ours in our group, like, he'll always third-wheel, fifth-wheel, seventh-wheel with couples, and he doesn't care. It took me a while to notice that he was. I think it's because, too, you and your boyfriend...

were in the friend group before you were dating. So it's not like he was with us and our two boyfriends. Yeah. You know what I mean? Exactly. That'd be weird. Yeah. But it's a normal scenario. Like I was friends with him before being friends. Before your boyfriend. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, he's our OG friend. He's our OG friend. And while we were on this double date with a fourth wheel, mid-date, we were saying how if...

We were single or ever happened to be single. Like he's for sure the one that we would marry. Oh, 1000. Because like, but like we would share him. Like we would be sister wives. Yeah. Sister wives and share him because he's just like a hundred percent best personality out of 1000. He's got game like no other. It's crazy. Yeah. He can talk it up.

And by talk it up, we mean has the most like negative Riz of all time that it turns into Riz. Yeah, right. Like it's so bad that it makes you LOL. So it's funny. And then he like jokes about it too. Like he just like, I don't know. It's just awesome. And our friends will be like, what do you mean? He is no game. And we're like, see, that's what you don't get. Because that would work on me. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Like, it's a weird... I feel like the girls I get it, get it. Like, someone just being, like, funny. Like, an example is, like, one time we were at the bars and he literally went to go over and sit on a girl's lap. And, like, that's so hilarious. Like, it's just funny. Or, like, one other time he started feeding a girl fucking ramen. Yeah, no, it's funny. It's hilarious. 100%. Ugh.

I love him. W-Riz. Yeah. Which we ended up getting back so early, which I was very happy about. We went to... How many bars did we go to? Two? Two. Yeah, two. Roosevelt Room was really cool. I like those drinks. I like Roosevelt Room. It's just so fun to sit and drink and talk and have chill...

nights where i don't wake up feeling like a degenerate right now that's my current thing like i like it so much i love it and there's so many cool places to go i know like on friday my boyfriend and i are going on a dinner date downtown i'm like after we're just gonna like bar hop i want it's so fun go to like little speakeasies too yeah and do stuff and yeah it's just really hot right now like i will probably get back like come fall fall

winterish time like I'll probably get back into like the latchkey type vibes because one fucking hot yeah because obviously like football is coming around people are gonna be outside like Ray Street's probably gonna be bumping again like just right now it's too hot I can't do it so and I am missing it a lot like I haven't been to latchkey in a month sounds great to me I was gonna say me too but I did go for like 30 minutes yeah but I didn't really do much there um Sunday was a fun Sunday we both got up and going which I love I

To get up and get going on a Sunday And have the whole day I had a facial appointment So I had to get up And then I went to the farmer's market Which is so fun And it was so funny I got juice land after my facial And I didn't see the text I just texted my boyfriend Because he stayed here

and i was like do you want juice land and he said yeah and i was just gonna get two of what i got i didn't really look for what he wanted i was gonna get two and i see him text me to get like a chocolate way smoothie that's not what i got us i got us two ginger shots and like a green protein smoothie and i was like see you answered way too late i did not get you chocolate i got you this green smoothie that literally it tasted like fucking grass and i was like did you like it

I mean, it was like he drank it. Good. But I was like, yeah, I didn't get you chocolate. So, sorry. I was like, yeah, I did not see that. I was getting a tube and I got... Ginger shot was ass. But it felt good to drink. And then we walked, walked the farmer's market. And then I had to go real grocery shopping. Yeah. I did pretty much all of that. And then we went shopping because...

my boyfriend need pants his like shirt game is slowly increasing but his pants game uh it's a disaster like he has like yes i can't talk about it on here because my boyfriend listens or maybe this is where i just tell him so i don't tell him yeah just tell him here we all know he's listening

Hello. Yeah, we're gonna have to get... Turn it up! Volume 10, baby! Yeah, we're gonna... I need to make a Pinterest mood board. Dude, yeah, that helped me out a lot. Well, I didn't do a Pinterest mood board. What I did was an Instagram board so you can, like, save things. And I just went to all my favorite creators, a.k.a. Flat Daddy Nick. He's, like, my biggest inspo for, like, style for my boyfriend. I'm, like, saving all of Flat Daddy Nick's fucking shit. And...

showed him this i'm like this yeah the vision board see you can show him fly daddy nick because he's that vibe yeah that's not gonna work for me yeah not the person i can go to for me it's that one couple that if you've been listening i've talked about before that they do couple outfits and they both look stunning and he looks great and he wears really good outfits dude we went to zara though on sunday and the stuff at zara is so fucking nice like

Like that's what i was trying to tell him we went into the like dressing room together and he's like trying things on i'm like Why am I literally getting turned on from a fucking shirt? Like what is going on? No, that's what I might just like put in an order of clothes, dude Yeah, so the thing is a good we went for pants or bottoms and we couldn't find anything in the size in stocks We had to buy things online later that day and

I'm like, you know what? We're in the dressing room. I'm like, can you at least like with the shorts, because he's trying the shorts on anyway, just to get an idea of what he needed before ordering it online. I'm like, can you at least try on the shirts to complete the outfit? Because I feel like when you're trying things on, you need to complete the outfit. You can't just try on just the bottoms. So I went to go grab a few shirts and he tries them on. He's looking in the mirror. He's like, damn, like I actually like really like this, but I'm not getting it. I'm not getting it. And I like tried to get him to budge and budge and budge. I was like begging him. I'm like, please, like this is the perfect date night shirt. And he's like,

and he's like no sam like you know i'm here for just fucking pants like that's all i'm doing i'm not spending the money on it so i was like i looked at him i go you know what like i'm buying this right now you're wearing this to um you're wearing this this weekend and you're taking me on a date like that's how we're doing an exchange and he goes okay fine like but you don't need to be doing this you don't need to be doing this like literally like begging me not to do it i'm like oh i'm doing it no i'm doing like there's one thing about like me is like

Fashion is very fucking big. And I know I can change it on him. Because his fucking fashion sucks. I remember when we first started dating, he asked me a scale of 1 out of 10. What's my fashion? I said 6 out of 10. He goes, oh, really? I thought you were going to go lower. I was like, honestly, if you want me to go lower, I would have went lower. I'm just being nice right now. I would have probably said... I don't think it's that bad. Bro. I would have said a 3 out of 10. It's fucking bad. Like the teddy bear shirt. Yeah, I mean...

I would probably say a 3 out of 10 in my eyes. You boys can't dress. I know. And like every now and then I'll wear like a little lemon or something. I'm like, oh, I'm like always hype it up. I'll always have it up. I'm like, oh my God, babe, like you look so good. Like hyping him up and he's like, really? Thanks. And now he like knows like what to wear to like get me happy. I'm like, yeah, I love that.

yeah i mean i brag on him like every single day he's gonna be so pissed listening to this i don't care hey um yeah i'm talking about you he always to the gym wears old t-shirts which i get yeah they're like so raggedy like holes in it like so raggedy and i'm like you need to get like i'm gonna put an order of like gym shark like cut off like like nice gym shirts yeah

Yeah, it needs to happen. Or like TLF stuff. Like my next order of TLF stuff, I'm going to get like fucking men's clothes. Yeah. These boys. Literally. But the thing is, it's like I don't mind like once a week buying him a shirt if he's going to take me to dinner. That's four new shirts a month that are going to be in his closet. Yeah, but he'd probably take you to dinner anyways.

Yeah, but like... I don't know. Here's the thing, too. I was like, I don't really want the relationship to be like him paying for dinner every single fucking time we go out. Like, it can be 50-50 every time. Like, you know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah, yeah. We definitely split. Well, he'll do dinner mostly, but unless it was like my idea. Yeah. But I'll split. But like...

I don't know. It's like a mind thing of like, oh, I'll buy the shirt. Take me to dinner. Yeah, 100%. Because it's like technically you're buying it, but technically you're not. We're just like, we're even it out. Yeah. Yeah.

He can buy you can buy him a shirt and he can buy you like a piece of lingerie. Yes. Yeah. We did go into Victoria's Secret while we were shopping. And the domain, too. Yeah. We were just like looking at things. I'm like, so what do you like? And I'm like, I'm not going to drop a bag on like a set from there. Fuck that. You're going to have to go on. I'm like, I will get it at Target. She isn't anywhere else like not here.

And I told him that because I was like, these are so expensive for me to wear at once. But I was like, oh, like, which do you like? And he's like, he's like mesmerized by everything. He's like, oh, my God. Like, I love this. I'm like, yeah, you would. Yeah. Victoria's Secret lingerie is literally 100 bucks. So that's a no from me. But, you know, I'll get a dupe on Shein or Amazon. Yeah. Not Victoria's Secret. Way too expensive. Nope. Not happening.

But, oh, I went to Urban Outfitters. Their lingerie is not...

Too bad. Price-wise. Now, remember when you bought lingerie? Yeah, dude. Oh, should we talk about that? What? Who was that for? Netflix boy? Yeah. Bro, let's fucking talk about that for a second. Let's talk about that. Oh, my God, guys. Long-ass fucking time ago. If you guys remember the Netflix show that we were, like, partially on, I was talking to a guy on that show, which none of it got aired because he ended up getting, like, booted from the show. And I was, like, really deeply, like, talking to this man, like...

pretty much could have called ourselves like boyfriend and girlfriend, but we weren't, there was no label or anything. So we were going on a date later that night. So I ran over to fucking urban outfitters cause we used to live downtown and the urban outfitters is downtown. And I bought a lingerie set and I was so ready to wear it for him. But then later that day he like basically broke up with me.

Which is fine now because at the end of the day, like now, like I got new boobs. Like that lingerie set doesn't even fit me anymore. So we got tossed in the trash. Dang. So fuck that. Sad. Yeah. He never got to see me in that lingerie set. He never got to see it. Well,

That's pretty much all that's new with me. Oh, I got my period the other day and the cramps on the first day of my period are what I think childbirth feels like. I've never been woken up by pain.

before i don't think like that i can remember where i literally just like shoot awake in the middle of the night because i am in so much pain i had such bad cramps it was absurd and then i had like bad cramps the whole day so now i think i'm living that life where the first day of my period is garbage yeah dude so i also we're like our singles are pretty like

Like, around the same time. But this is officially one month of being off birth control. One year. Or one year. What the fuck am I saying? Yeah, one year of being off birth control. And I feel like I definitely now know my body. Like, this is, I think, my first real periods because the cramps are... When I say real periods, I mean...

know of that like so the people say like it's still kind of like in you like the hormones like i feel like these are i'm feeling everything in these periods this one was still regular but off by like five days i think um so not too bad but mine's always like the 29 30 day mark the last four months it's consistently been that and this i

past month like it's crazy i feel my body ovulating i feel my body entering like my luteal phase i like i feel myself i'm like it's so crazy because six months ago people would always talk about that like you feel it you feel it i'm like what the fuck are you talking about you feel it this podcast i listen to says she can feel which ovary is releasing the egg dude like she knows if it's a right or left bro

It's not like it's so crazy. I'm like, like tender boobs, like never for me was a thing. And now my and you know, it's another crazy thing is like, I got my surgery and

And, like, right around the surgeries when I started to feel those symptoms from my period of, like, tender boobs. And I was thinking to myself, I'm like, oh, no, it's just because I got, like, surgery and, like, my boobs are tender. Like, they're tight. They're not fluffed yet. Like, no, bitch. Like, that was my fucking hormones, like, telling me, like, yeah, bitch, this is a symptom for you. Like, you got tender boobs. My boobs get way bigger on my period. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. Yours are, you know, the plastic stays the same size. But mine...

My boobs get bigger on my period. Definitely. Yeah. Definitely. Like in a sports bra, all of a sudden I can tell like,

I go to the gym without a shirt off, with a shirt off, and there's a cleavage. Yeah. It's that kind of vibe. No, it's crazy. Mac just fucking farted. Oh, my God, Mac. But, yeah, the first day of my period rocks me with the cramps. It's so unbearable. So, I feel you girls that really deal with cramps like your whole period. I never dealt with cramps until right now. So...

Yeah. Debilitating cramps. Like I was trying to hip thrust. I was doing a really light leg day and someone commented, oh my God, hip thrusting on the first day of your period queen. I would like to let you guys know I did two sets of that hip thrust because I had never experienced like having cramps and like loading weight in that area of your like where your uterus is.

Holy shit. It was so painful. Like if you watch the whole video, which obviously you guys can't but like in my phone me waiting to hip thrust I like go to start and then I go back down And i'm like breathing with my eyes closed because i'm like getting a cramp and I like have to like load it up And i'm like girl i'm not that strong I did two sets that hip thrust was literally not happening happening with that weight on my uterus. I was like, this is a

Fuck no. Yeah. Like I couldn't do it. Luckily last week when I was in the Bahamas is when I was on my period. So I didn't even work out the whole week I was there. I like was like, this is perfect timing. I'm on vacation. I'm on vacation.

Don't need to work out. I love it. So I didn't work out. I took a lot of rest other weeks this month. So I'm trying to like work out. I realized because if you listen before I wasn't lifting on my period, I'm still going lighter on my period, lighter in this phase in general. But right before my period is actually I think when my energy dips the lowest. So I might have to

Take advantage and I think I'm going to lift less like really really kind of not lift like I'm basically not putting any pressure on it in the week before in the week of like if I feel up to it I'll do it if I'm not I won't and it'll probably be lighter but basically the whole like week before week of.

What gets done in terms of weights is what gets done. And if it's a whole week off, if it's like four days off, it is what it is. And then the week after my period, I'll train like a motherfucking beast. And then the cycle repeats. Yeah. So one thing that I do want to start, which I was going to start this past week, is nutrition cycling with my phases. Because I want to see if...

I can kind of tame my PMSing a little bit, like the symptoms of like my cramps and my moodiness, my fucking moods just like change like left and right. So I just want to test it out and see if it makes a difference. I follow, um,

Oh my god, why am I drawing a blank on her fucking name? Oh, oh, really pretty girl like black hair. Yes. Why am I drawing a blank? Grace. Yes. So I follow her. She does a really good job at it. She nutrition cycles with her period or with her cycle. So like certain foods you should be consuming based on whatever phase you're in. But she does a juice.

every day so like whatever the veggies are for that cycle she just makes it into a juice and like that is so fucking easy so i don't have to really i don't have to like stress of like what am i gonna for breakfast lunch and dinner no just make a juice of all the fruits and veggies that you need to be consuming during that cycle so i think that's what i'm gonna do because i'm already doing the nuts because if you were to look up on google like the nutrition cycling like thing it will give you like

fruits, veggies, your proteins, your carbs, your like nuts and seeds and your fats. Like I'm already doing the seeds. Um, so I don't really need to put that into like my juice. And if I can take like the fruits and the veggies, make it into a juice, um,

and it's like i'm already and then the protein's not that hard right the protein's like oh like i didn't have a lot of a lot of fish this week okay i'll just save getting chicken i'll just get fish all this week you know so i'm gonna start that next week and see how that helps with like my pmsing because it's been kind of bad i know i'm like i feel so bad for my boyfriend i'm like bro literally i'm like bro like you have to fucking deal with me i'm a bitch bro

Speaking of boyfriend, I got to go run down because I told him that I would unlock the door so he can come here while we're podcasting and I forgot. He didn't unlock the door. So I'm going to let him into our house. Yeah, I mean, I'll keep the cast. Or we could just cut this out. No, I'll keep them entertained. If you have something to say, go for it. Dude, yeah.

All right, let's wait until she removes herself from the room and closes the door No, mac mac just left me Anyways guys. Yeah. I mean i'm having a grand old time I keep getting questions about if i'm gonna join back on youtube yet Um, i'm gonna be completely honest with you guys I don't really know. I am enjoying life without youtube at the moment Trust me. I loved doing youtube but it comes to a point where like I just can't do all the platforms at once like

Some are going to suffer when others are doing great. And right now, TikTok is just popping the fuck off for me. So I just don't feel the need to be getting into YouTube right now. I did tell myself every year I'm going to take one month break. And so this past July, I took a break and I just never got back into it. So maybe...

soon i will i'm not gonna put any pressure on it but i know you guys are have been asking a lot in my dms i just have been loving snapchat and tiktok and just spamming the shit out of it so and i've seen like benefits from it and like doing it but we shall see i don't know taylor's back though and mac is just roaming around

and What not but that was pretty much it. Do you have anything else in regards like our week? No, I don't I don't either Um, oh, well, okay So the last thing I have is my little project that i'm working on I'll give you guys a little bit of a hint about it But I don't want to do too much quite yet because i'm gonna I have another meeting Either at the end of the week or the beginning of next week with um the man i'm working with um

Because I don't want to jinx things, you know? I'm a big person that's like, I don't want to jinx shit, okay? So I do have a project that I've been working on. And it's going to be like an in-person type project. So I was touring spaces today. And like I said earlier in the podcast, one of the spaces had a little office podcast studio. And I was just looking at it. I was like, oh my god, this is so fucking cool. Like, taking up a space. Like, putting it in there. Like, because...

I don't want to say too much, but that would just be sick. But yeah, a lot of the spaces were pretty fucking cool. I looked at like 10 spaces today. And hopefully the next steps are to put in some offers to those spaces. And if I can start to narrow it down to like three spaces that I can really put all my energy into and secure one, that would be amazing. Dope. Because I don't want to have to keep touring. Touring is exhausting. Yeah.

So fucking exhausting. But yeah.

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green gems, head over to wonderfulpistachios.com. Trust me, they're a game changer when it comes to snacking. Join me on this pistachio-filled adventure and let's redefine what it means to snack. Visit wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more. So now let's jump into the topic about managing mental health because no one's mental health I feel like is ever totally perfect. And I think we've been through the ringer with a lot of stuff of the differences between managing kind of

The like mental health issues that arise for no reason that you're kind of born with that just come out of nowhere. And then the mental health that happens because a certain thing like triggers it and makes it like a whole big thing. And like kind of going through seasons, like the difference between like, let's say like having depression versus like being depressed, like for a bit of time because of one singular thing. Like there's so many different realms. Yeah.

But I think we have like certain things in place of how we like stay under control. Yeah. I feel like I never really struggled with my mental health until obviously social media. Like I was on such like a high of like... I know there are people out there that are like, what's anxiety? Like just breathe. Like we have a friend that's like that. Like when we bring up anxiety and like panic attacks and stuff, they're like, just breathe. Like what? Like what are you talking about? Like I definitely was like that person that like thought...

like it's not that deep but like it really is and like a few years ago I started to really like notice these things and struggle with these things but it's like Taylor said it's definitely seasonal it comes and goes in waves and like the second you think you're over one thing something else comes in and then you have to learn how to manage that particular situation and how you're gonna overcome like

the mental aspect of it if that makes sense yeah um i think the reason people struggle to understand is because they don't really understand the difference between mental health and like emotion yeah because feeling sad sometimes and feeling nervous sometimes and feeling angry sometimes is not mental health mental like having your mental health under control is not being happy all the time when your mental health isn't under control you are literally debilitated like you are injured

like you like if i go through a really bad episode of my depression i can't fucking function like i can't like and it's obviously like yes you can like your body physically can but in that moment like getting yourself to like do anything is so hard or like when you go through anxiety it's not just something makes you a little anxious it's like

You literally think you're dying. Yeah. Like you literally think you're dying. You see no way to control it. It's it's like deeper than just emotion. So just remember, like having your mental health under control doesn't mean being happy all the time. Yeah, I think for me, because I'm trying to remember where it really started, but I think it started for me when I started getting anxiety. Yeah.

Like that's where it started for me, which was really strange because I didn't understand it. Like we would go out and I wasn't at the time very big on going out. Like I had my phases in high school and college where I was going out, but then we moved here together and we didn't really go out that much at the very beginning. Like we'd go out on occasion and during those times when we go out on occasion, like I'd wake up the next morning, like, and I would stand up from my bed and I would all of a sudden get like really fucking dizzy. My heart would start racing. And I was just like, well,

what the fuck is going on? Like, I don't understand this. And it started to get worse and worse and worse. And like the anxiety aspect. And then from there, it was just kind of like a,

snowball effect of like different things that would happen not only just from like my personal life but also social media that didn't help that was like building up onto it so yeah that's where I started yeah uh for me it was uh in college I realized that I think college brought out traits that were already there I didn't realize like

It kickstarted my depression for sure. I never thought I was anywhere near depressed before this. But anxiety, I think I realized it was something I always kind of had because there was little things that I realized like, okay, I think I actually have been always kind of an anxious person. Like, for example, being late, if I was in a car late to something, gave me like such insane, like I would get restless, like at the thought of,

The ETA on the GPS being five minutes later what I was supposed to be. Like my whole life just being like that. The idea of getting like in trouble, the idea of getting a bad grade just like makes me like my heart starts racing. Not that like panic attack feeling, but just I would get so nervous about it. So when I started getting like anxiety attacks because my horrible college experience, I realized that I think I always had a little bit of that.

in me of being just an anxious person because I feel like there'd be a lot of situations where everyone else would be totally calm and I'd be like kind of the one freaking out. Yeah. You know what? Now that I'm thinking about it, dude, my fucking first panic attack that I had was when I smoked weed. Oh, same. Like first ever fucking panic attack. Yeah. I'd have to say same. But I didn't. The thing is, and that's why I don't smoke. I think I have trouble calling it a panic attack because it was like

like yeah but that was the first time I ever experienced like that high fucking heart rate I threw up I literally grabbed my phone and started calling 911 but like my friend like stole my phone took my phone from me but like

I've never felt like that in my entire life and had no fucking control of my heart rate. Like, forced vomiting. Like, insane. So, I think that's kind of what stemmed it. I don't like using the word stemmed it, but that's the first thing. And then after that, it was just kept... Yeah, I mean, my college...

with like my mental health was derived from like loneliness and just I've honestly it was so traumatic that I'm not gonna lie I blacked it out so I don't have much to say it's crazy how life will do that to you yeah I'm like I actually don't really remember when I started getting anxious at school I quite literally couldn't tell you much about it if it seems like 20 years ago because my brain just said nope we're not remembering that anymore but

It was definitely really scary. Like thought I had to go to the fucking hospital. And then I was kind of I know this sounds insane, but it's like dead ass true for like a year. I was kind of in a state of a constant anxiety attack and I didn't really know it until I ended. But it was kind of an anxiety attack that didn't go away for an entire year. It's that's like with everything that was like you don't realize the state you're in until you are an outsider looking in on your own life.

Right. Like, and you might think I'm exaggerating and I swear to God, I'm not like, you can call it my therapist from at the time I was literally in a constant anxiety attack, like for a year. It was insane. Um, and I'll have to say the reason that that got better is because I started taking medication and

And I think some people like don't like SSRIs and I don't think you're supposed to be on them for a long time. So I actually do want to transition out of it just because I've been taking it for a while.

Um, but that's the only thing that made it better. I was exercising. I was trying to journal I was reading y'all was doing everything This was like the peak of the most dedicated i've been to fitness in my entire life The most dedicated i've been to eating healthy. I had no friends I was not going out and drinking like this was the most dedicated I was in my whole entire life to doing healthy things I would do yoga. I would do it all constant panic attack. So that's why I started taking medication

And that's the only thing that made it better. That's the only thing that since then I have not felt that way. And if I have begun to feel that way, I can stop it. It doesn't like take over. I can stop it by just breathing, by understanding my triggers. Sometimes it happens over the weirdest things. I get a lot of health anxiety sometimes.

perfect example and i know this sounds ridiculous it is ridiculous i got those smoothies from juice land and they use way that's um non-animal way so they're doing this new thing where they can make milk and milk proteins with like cells like they don't need to use an animal to do it so they're coming out with like milk products that are real milk that you don't need animals so it's like kind of vegan because you don't you need an animal yeah whatever so something new

And like I don't really drink whey protein. When I tell you like I thought I was getting like an allergic reaction to the smoothie. Like I was driving and I was like I thought my like throat was closing. Like I thought I was getting allergic reaction to the smoothie because I'd never like had that before. And it's like really, really understanding your triggers and not letting yourself like

spiral into a million things so like literally for five minutes i just had to like take a sip of water like not drink it realize i was fine breathe but really really understanding what's making you feel that way and like how you can fix it and like trying to go toward reality because like it sounds so stupid but i know that happens to a lot of people they're like thinking you're allergic to something thing or just like health anxiety like oh my god i'm dying but like understanding my triggers is huge for me being hungry is a really big

Trigger I need to eat. I cannot be somewhere feeling dehydrated and hungry I think i'm gonna pass out and that feeling i've literally never fainted mind you but that feeling of that i'm gonna faint Makes me anxious. So like understanding like so don't put yourself in that situation I can't skip breakfast. That's not something I can do. Oh god. No, I would go booking In college I would skip breakfast and drink a cold brew No

Yeah, and you're like, I wonder why I was so anxious. I posted on my story my breakfast in college because it was a Snapchat memory. It was a bang energy drink, 300 milligrams of caffeine, and a single rice cake with a little bit of peanut butter and banana. And then I fucking wonder why sitting in math class I had a panic attack. Yeah. Hello. Like, the bang energy drink and the singular banana. Yeah.

Didn't cut it for you. Yeah. Like it's just like understanding your triggers and being honest with what you need to fucking change because yeah, skipping breakfast, not something I can do. Yeah. I feel like I went through a stage of like a one year time period where it was constantly like different things. So at first it was like the anxiety and

The anxiety kind of stopped But then all of a sudden It was The social anxiety So I couldn't even like Go out to like Bars or clubs Or like loud environments Like

It was really bad. It was so fucking bad. Like, we went to ACL, the music festival. I had to fucking leave because, like, I could not be there. Like, I was so anxious. Like, I couldn't get myself to just, like, enjoy having a good time being at live music. Like, I literally went home before the sun went down because I just couldn't be there anymore. Then from that, like, I... It's...

Everything that I went through I feel like it was a constant like funnel of like, okay Like I know this triggers me right now at the time being during this time in my life I just can't be there for that. So i'm not gonna do it. So the anxiety like that happened Whatever I kind of learned how to control that then it went to like the social anxiety I was like, okay I just can't be in social environments like this at the time being that have alcohol. I just can't do it Stop going to that and then from there it ended up going into like social anxiety of like

like things alone. Like I couldn't go, like I went back home and I went to order, pick up a Chipotle. This is the first time I really experienced this. And I went to Chipotle to do like a pickup order. Literally all I needed to do was walk in there to get my Chipotle, pick it up, walk back to my car. Could not get myself out of my car to go pick up my food. Like my body, like I wish I had an explanation for it, but like my body literally would not like

My legs would not move I could not get myself out of my car And in that moment, I felt so vulnerable and like sad I just started bawling my eyes out because i'm like what the fuck sam like you've never been like this Why can't you just get out of your car right now and go pick up your food? So I literally just like got not got back in my car, but I like stayed back in my car Drove home went back inside and my parents looked at me like why don't you have your food? I'm like

I don't know and I just went up to my room and just was in like a mopey like sad little depressive scene from the rest of the night like I have like snap memories of me like bawling my eyes out in bed and obviously I'm blaming it all on fucking what happened on social media because at the time social media for us was like not a safe place whatsoever so it's just like it was like a massive like

Reality check for me that like I needed to step away from social media because these things were all happening I felt like for me personally from social media. So then from that moment on Because this was around like what christmas time we then I wasn't on social media for like a few months so

Yeah. I have like two things to say on what you said because I think they were like really important things that you said about how you have to like remove yourself from those situations. Like this is making you anxious to be going out. So you remove yourself and 100%. I went through a big phase of anxiety too because I had this experience drinking and it's something I've never talked about online. Maybe one day I'll talk about it because it's...

a really important thing in my life but a very very bad experience was someone drinking i think i got roofied i'm 99 positive i got roofied really really bad night you can like infer what you want this wasn't this the same weekend that i was just talking about too

probably i think it was well this was before all that happened yeah no this was too this was around the wasman type shit maybe maybe and i went home for um feel lucky this is something i it's something i've been wanting to share it's hard for me to put out there because i know my parents listen to this and i don't want people worrying about me because this was a long time ago and maybe one day i'll share it because i know people have similar experiences whatever but i'm fine now

And like that gave me a lot of anxiety, rightfully so. And just like you have a few bad moments with alcohol and they give you anxiety, which is why you just got to like learn your limits so that you don't do that. And I think we both went through that period of stepping out of situations that aren't good for us, but knowing we're not completely running away from it. Oh, yeah. Because you can't just run away from things that make you anxious. Yeah.

And just run away from them. You need to find other things that like. You need to like. Replace it. Yeah. And you need to heal yourself. And it's like I healed myself. And then I went back. And now I know myself. I know situations that make me anxious. I know how much to drink. How much not to drink. How I like. Your environment to be. How I like my environment to be. Which is why I'm. Which is why I've been saying in the beginning of this podcast. So I'm like hey like.

I like more low-key nights. I would rather not go to big clubs and just sit there and talk like... Good thing Austin doesn't got big clubs. But even just big crowded, I would rather sit and be able to talk. Just little things, knowing your environment and not running away from it because it's not like you then...

never ever went out again or like never go get food by yourself like yeah you have to it's like you slowly go back into doing it but you're just aware and i think it's literally a roller coaster like you are you're gonna constantly have your ups and downs right and i think the other thing that's really important that a lot of people might not get when they see us and think we're just promoting being degenerates and like drinking our body weight away um

I think if you're hearing what we're saying, this is why we promote the lifestyle that we do so much so young is because we went through being those people that literally couldn't handle a night out with their friends and having one or two drinks without completely spiraling into the worst mental health state. Even without alcohol, couldn't go to fucking Chipotle without crying. I couldn't walk around a college campus crying.

Without crying. I couldn't sit in a class without having a panic attack. So I think the people that listen to us, you guys probably already know, but this is a podcast you stumbled on. The reason we are so big on living life is because we have been at the points where we like,

ran away from all that or couldn't handle it, which is now how we can like do so much. Like, yeah, I'm actually proud of myself that I can go out and have fun on a Saturday and literally continue on with life and not be having a panic attack on Sunday. Yeah. And I'm glad that I like overcame that. And I think that's something as a young 20 something like we should overcome rather than just saying that you're going to

Maybe cut something out forever because it makes you a little bit anxious Yeah, and maybe that's like controversial But I think when you're young like you need to live and i'm not just an alcohol No, i'm not saying like drink even though it makes you anxious but like travel makes me anxious Yeah, but like I went to mexico Yeah, you know what? I mean like do it not just like oh I don't want to do that So i'm not going to do it and like stay on my routine because my routine feels safe. Yeah no, that is so important like get it like

constant change is what is going to make you better like mentally right I feel like the constant things that you are adding and improving in your life is going to be what's going to make you more mentally stable because like think about it the amount that we've done and explored and experienced in the last like two years like I have not

done that much in the last like two years before that if that makes sense like we've done so much that it's like it's helping build more trust in myself and confidence within myself that i can do right more so yeah we're getting deep yeah no 100 but like like i think people are

We have routines. We thrive on routine. And I think a lot of people push like never and like they're always, always, always in their routine. They travel. They stay in their routine. And it's like I think at that point you're almost in a point of being comfortable that you're like almost scared to get out of your routine. And I get it. Like I would have times where I'd be like, no, no, like I need like like being on a vacation. Like, no, no, I need to go for a walk. Like, yeah, like I

Like it's all you consume thoughts of like when am I going to work out? I need to like I just like need to do my things and my routine. What's on the menu for tonight? Can I even eat there? Yeah, like freaking out about routine and realizing that like that's actually me trying to control my anxiety in an unhealthy way. Yeah, and it's way healthier for me now that I can do things that are different and survive and not freak out and be in a different environment and

I can be in a room full of people I don't know and like survive and that's not something I could do before. Little things. I was with my mom and I couldn't talk to strangers. My parents were here and I said something. I asked someone something. I think I asked someone where I got their clothes or...

Oh, someone walked by me in a restaurant. I was like, oh my god I love your boots or like her shirt or something and she was like, oh thanks And I just told my mom I was like do you realize how I would have never done that? Like that's I just like I don't know. I couldn't get outside My like comfort zone in anything and I think a lot of people's routines and their things is like their comfort zone Where it's like you need to just like it's like inputting. It's like exposure therapy. Yeah, like talking to people is like

I can't fucking talk to people. That makes me anxious. Like asking for help makes me anxious. So it's like little things like compliment someone on the street. You've never done that. Like it's literally like exposure therapy. Yeah. No, it is. And another thing too, I would like to add, because this definitely is something that helped us tremendously without even noticing it is animals.

100% emotional support animals like Mac was a blessing in disguise I needed him the most when I actually got him and it wasn't like that's not why I got him was for like the mental health aspect but it just so happened to be at the right time when like everything started to happen for me with social media and like my mental health just fucking plummeting to the ground like

Having Mac by my side was literally the main reason I wanted to get out of bed in the morning because I had something that I needed to... Mac needed to be fed. Yeah, Mac needed to be fed. Mac needed to go outside. He was a puppy. He needed to learn how to go potty. He needed to learn how to...

like sleep in his crate like he needed me and like it was just a vice versa like relationship that i had with mac when i was at my lowest look at him just staring this is so funny because he's just staring at us and he has no idea what we're talking about and you're being so deep about him and he's just sitting here staring up at us oh i love you mackie

But yeah, no, it's true. Like, I know I didn't, you know, I didn't adopt him. He wasn't free. But like, you can adopt a dog, like, or foster a dog or just do whatever you need if you are feeling like lonely. Because I can understand like people that live alone, like, it can be lonely. Like, I obviously have always lived with Taylor, but like, just having an emotional support dog or animal is like huge for the program. Even for me, the reason I...

I had my cat and it's for me was more so what I was saying in the responsibility aspect because when I'm like in that depressive mode, I really can't do things. But like I said, the cat needs to be fed. They obviously they're way less work and you could even do this with a fish. Like maybe the only requirement you did that day was feed your fish. But like you need to get out of bed and feed your fish. Like it needs to get done. What are you going to do? Kill your animal because you're sad. Like it's,

It's just – and sometimes all you need is that one thing getting done to, like, kickstart the other things. Like, sometimes all you need is one task checked off, and that helps a

You get to do all your other tasks. So maybe your one task is like, okay, I have to get up and feed my cat because this cat needs to live. Yeah. It's my responsibility and I have to feed the fucking cat and I have to clean the litter box. So you have to do it. So, but then you're already up and then you do everything else you need to do. So I think that's like reasons it's really helped me is like,

I literally have to get up and take care of something. And this thing, like, relies on me. Yeah. And another thing, too, I would like to add in, which obviously these things are not, like, realistic things that you can change overnight. Like, animals can be expensive. This has been, like I said, this has been four years. Yeah. But, like, animals can be expensive. There's food involved. Like, their crate, their toys, like, their fucking...

oh my god vaccines like it's expensive i get it um but another thing too is your living environment because your living environment is crucial if you find yourself you're dealing with depression you're dealing with anxiety anything like that like the way you live has a full representation of how you are going to be day to day like taylor and i

When we were struggling a lot living together, not physically together, like fighting, but we were both mentally not at our best. We lived in a dungeon. A dungeon. There was one whole fucking window throughout the entire kitchen and- Kitchen, living room. Living room and office space. One window and-

At the time, we didn't realize how fucking bad it was. But the second we moved out and moved into this new place with all the natural lighting, like my creativity, my happiness, my will to get out of bed. My will to live. Literally changed so much. So like just kind of reflect on your living environment. See if like,

You know, you're living in a fucking dungeon like us. Like it makes the biggest difference. Yeah. Having natural light. I would also like to say the one window we faced, like we were in a courtyard. The window did not get sunlight. So we might as well have not had a window. There was, there basically would have been no window. We would wake up. I literally wouldn't even know.

What was going on like outside. Yeah. I'd be like, is it raining? Is it sunny? No, literally. I have no idea. No fucking clue. No clue. I have no clue what the weather is. And it was literally a dungeon. It was a dungeon. When we started touring houses to live in,

And saw the way houses had windows. I was like, oh my God. Dude, I literally bought a fucking spotlight thing. The thing we're using right now for podcasting, I literally bought that to film my recipe videos in the kitchen. That's how dark it was. So dark. So dark. And then we had like issues in our complex too. Like it was just...

The lighting though and like when my parents came and saw it like when we got a new house and our videos my mom was like holy shit there was no light where you used to live. Yeah. Like you can even go back like look at videos. It was so normal but it's not. Hell no. It was

genuinely awful and it's like oh yeah like yeah would we have been sad anyway yeah would I have been a little bit happier if I didn't feel like I was in a cave mm-hmm 1 million percent it was harder to go outside yeah so yeah living environments I can even also like imagine to like even like roommate environments like just put yourself first and

always, I know, like I said, it's not that easy, Sam, but put some of those things into consideration because it makes the biggest difference. It's not that easy, but it

Is in the sense that we're talking about like years on years on years. Yeah, like it is that it's not gonna change overnight because like a lot of you are in like a lease It is that easy next year like your next lease you you have a next lease like, you know Something with more like you There are things and it's this is not month. This is not have two leases at once because you need somewhere else to live and need windows Yeah, oh no, this is like like I said, like a Years long months long like long time process of figuring it out um

But I can't recommend Windows enough. Genuinely, Sunshine. Like, you literally need Windows. Yeah. So those are just my two things. Obviously, like...

It's fucking common sense. Like get your body moving, go to the gym, move your body, eat well, treat your body right. Like those are big things that are going to play a role. But I feel like our audience is already doing those things. But those are just the two things that maybe you may not realize like living environment and a dog or animal in any sense will help. I think also social media is big and content is big. Yeah.

It's going to look different for everyone what they like to see, but content is big for me. I've had spots of muting people. They're not doing anything wrong, because you have to be responsible for your own triggers instead of the trolls that leave hate comments because...

you know, people are triggering them. We trigger them. But that's your own problem. Yeah, like it's not... It's not me that's the problem. It's going to end up being the problem if you're triggered by my full day of eating or you're triggered by my recipe. But if you are triggered by a full day of eating, like...

So mute the like. Yeah just mute us. Or like on TikTok you have to block like I get it like sometimes like you're in a spot where you can't do it like and no one is making you any sort of way. They're not doing anything wrong but like you are just like hey I can it could be something as simple like I don't know like maybe you're in a really depressive state because like

you went through a really bad breakup and like you someone you know like or you follow this creator that's posting like all her wedding content and that's like literally triggering for you and like ruining your whole entire day you don't need to see it yeah like you literally don't need to see it if that's like there's no reason that you should be consuming all that content like all the time if that's like making you insanely mad that can go for literally anything it can be like for us at least like there's this one content creator that we follow that

we're like mutuals with and all she ever talks about is like the brand deal she gets and like how successful and how successful she is and how much money she makes as a full-time content creator now for us that's not realistic for us like we can't fucking live off of social media and it triggers us and we don't like it so we've muted her like yeah it's just like it's hard everyone has their things that they just don't want to see on social media 100 it's your fucking phone you're in control of what you want to see on it and

And people get so mad at me like, oh my God, there's so many content creators that I've blocked on social media. And content creators will literally make videos about me being like, Sam Taylor blocked me. And then people will send it to me. I'm like, I didn't block them because we're like beefing. I just blocked them because I just don't like their videos. And sadly on TikTok, you can't just like you or something.

You have to block. Yeah, you have to block. God, what was the person's name? Beat Sabrina. No, no, no. Oh, no, she blocked you. No, I blocked her. Oh. God, what? That video pissed me the fuck off. Mark the Nark. Mark Nutritionist. Dude, his videos were just so annoying. I'm sorry. I just thought his videos were annoying. I just didn't want to see them anymore.

And he made a whole video saying like, Sam Taylor blocked me, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, bro, it's not that deep. You didn't leave a hate comment. I didn't hate you. I just thought your videos were annoying. And there's some people I felt that way too, like,

Even on TV, I'm like, wow, this person just pisses me off. It's just like, why are you taking it so offensively that I blocked you? It's not you as a person. It's just your videos, your content. I don't even know who I have blocked. I don't like watching it. Yeah, fair. I mean, whatever. Imagine if I made a video of videos about people that blocked me. I don't know. I don't take it to offense. We don't make videos about anyone, yet people think that all we do is make videos about people. Literally. When we literally don't make videos about anyone. I don't.

So I don't really know what that's about. But I feel like we just talked about like so much good stuff. Like I feel like we're really being like full of wisdom. Dude, I want to go look at my blocked list now. Hold on. Privacy. Oh, God. Blocked accounts. I blocked so many people.

I pretty much blocked the entire fitness realm. That's what I need to do. I need to clear out my Instagram. I don't like scrolling on TikTok and it's like purely fitness content. It's so repetitive. That's how my Instagram is. It's so cheesy. I hate mic'd up workout. Like I hate it. Like I don't like it, which like call me a hater. I don't care. Like it's just,

People have things they don't like to see. I don't like to see it. So that's how my Instagram is. I probably blocked you. I need to switch up my whole Instagram. It's uninspiring to me. Yeah. I just I can't. I need to do it. I need to get everything under control. I just forget. Um.

Who else? Yeah, just pretty much fitness people. Like, that's about it. It won't let me actually, like, keep going. Then, obviously, Melissa. I blocked Melissa in her 12 million accounts, trolling me, saying I don't eat carbs.

yeah that's about it and then wasman wasman what a man dude so funny i have like the screenshots all from that like whole incident back in whatever how long ago was that i don't even know that was literally hell it back in november of 2021 this man literally making videos saying that he's going to ruin my life and destroy me in every piece threatening basically threatening my life

And I have screenshots of all. Count your blessings, y'all. You should be thankful I'm not in the same state as you. Begging in my DMs. Oh my God, yeah, no, not him. He was physically threatening us. He was literally like, I'm going to kill you.

Tags me and Drew because Drew like he made it. Drew made that guy literally was giving me physical threats. Yeah. Surprise. Sam Taylor didn't block me yet on Instagram either and tagged me my regular page and my backup page. This guy, y'all are snakes for real. For real. Wasn't inch away from taking my video down. Y'all. Yes. Count your blessings. Remember, kids don't feed snakes. They bite their hands and keep feeding them.

No, this guy got mad because I posted that I hate when guys with 20K act like celebrities. And he took that as offense. A lot of people did. They thought I was calling myself a celebrity when I don't know how you get that when all I said was if you have 20,000 Instagram followers, stop acting like a celebrity, which I think is a really true statement. And I'll stand by that statement till the day I die. He was just calling us like whores because we were wearing biker shorts in the gym. He got really attacked that I said that he wasn't a celebrity. Yeah.

He really, really, really ran and got really, really pissed. I'm going to read the whole thing. Listen, let's get our definition straight, please. It wasn't tearing down a woman. It was tearing. When she tears down when he's talking about Drew right now, because Drew made like a whole video about him, like sticking up for Taylor.

And I don't expect repercussions back. Honestly, if it's very simple and straight as can be, let alone you guys are supporting some dumb fucking shit that claims men are misogynistic. Are you fucking kidding me now? Honestly, I came here to try to resolve things and was caught.

gonna try to do so. Keep in mind, I have not even messaged this guy back yet. Like, he's literally... No, this is like... They're all separate texts. They're all separate things and, like, I have not responded yet. You know what? Post this on the story of the Instagram when this episode goes up so people can see. Yeah. Let alone you guys are all...

Now, wait, where am I left off? But honestly, sad enough, supporting a girl that's sexist and gives bad vibes. Girl, I really hope you understand the dangers in what you're supporting. Drew is so dangerous. The dangers that way Drew speaks.

You don't get it because it's in your favor. But supporting facts is not fiction. I'm very, very well spoken and very specific when I say my words. So trust me. Once again, Drew took down my video for going viral over 18 vids in the last two days. I'm going to keep going. I could keep reading, but this man is fucking nuts. I love how he's calling Drew dangerous when he physically threatened us. Physically said that if he lived in the same state, he would hurt us. Yeah. Yeah.

make it even worse he lives in his fucking parents basement literally guys this was so long ago but like this is insanity that happened and if you were around start to like the downfall of like our mental health with social media yeah but um drew still follows us and engages with my content and that is one of my biggest flex on earth is that drew knows who i am so yeah exactly that's thank you for like literally giving me like i see drew watches my instagram story and i'm like

Oh my god. Like, I like Fangirl. Yeah. No way. So thanks, Wasm. Speaking of him, he made a video about us, like, recently. Recently? Someone sent it to me. I can't remember what it was, but I was like, dude, this guy loves us. Obsessed with me. Anyways. Yeah.

First circle moment. Like, honestly, this is so full circle with the episode. Like, the fact that this would make us cry and, like, we would be so sad and now I'm laughing at it. Full circle. Now I'm laughing at it. Like, literally, mental health check. Mental health. Yeah. For real. God, I love social media. God, I love it. But that's why we just...

Like make this podcast like we do every single thing we do and like want you guys to genuinely feel good because we have been through so much and of course are constantly changing like next year we probably will look back on everything we did this year and still be like oh my god, we live life so different now because that's how you grow and change and evolve but I think in everything I've learned in the last four years of my life regarding mental health this is just the best that I've been and the best that we've both been since living together and

I feel good. And it's funny too, because I got a compliment at the gym two days ago. Justin came up to me and he was like, I just want to let you know, like two different people came up to me at the gym today saying how much progress that like I've specifically made in the gym over the last year. And I look at Justin, I'm like, first of all, thank you for letting me know that, like that people make compliments about me, not to me, but to you. And you came to me and gave me the compliments, like playing telephone. But I was like, honestly, no,

I have not worked out like how I have in previous years. It's just the stress that I've been less on my body. The less stress I've put on my body has made a very big impact on my overall appearance, not only with the confidence, but like the retention of fucking water. Like the more stressed I am as a person, like I am bloated. I am,

feeling puffy like not all there like so it's just overall like mentally doing better plays a big role on my outside appearance yep so for sure yeah yeah yeah what's that from fuck you mean yeah

All right, guys. I got to pee. I got to make a snack. I say that in the fucking episode, every episode. I need a snack. I shouldn't have this massive water. My boyfriend's just also in this house. Yeah. We were just talking so much shit on him. I know. We're going to go downstairs. He's going to be like, what were you guys talking about today? Nothing. Who am I kidding? He's going to listen to this. Fuck. I'm going to take a picture of what he's wearing at the gym and post it on the podcast. Yeah, you should. We should just start like a...

on the story posting when we don't like our boyfriend's outfits, we should post. I know. I also need to get a really good photo with him because I want to just hard launch him already. Photos. Okay, this weekend. I know. We're going on a date on Friday. Oh, on the boat. Fuck, on the boat, yeah. But also at the same time, Friday's going to be wearing a cute outfit. I don't know. We'll see. Maybe on Friday, like, depending on what you do, like, after...

Yeah. Dinner. Yeah. But like golden hour is right when our dinner is. Or maybe like I was gonna say maybe before like I don't know I'm doing Friday but like maybe I'll also want to do dinner and drinks on Friday. Yeah. Like come downtown with us and then you guys just go your own way.

Fuck that would be perfect So we can get pics Yeah Cause like what I'm gonna do On Friday is I'm gonna get ready here And like make a drink While I'm getting ready And like Everyone keeps sending me The frozen fucking Espresso martini thing And I'm like you know what Finally guys I'm gonna make it On Friday While I'm getting ready Cause I get tagged in it All the time So I was like you know what I'm gonna make it

and i'm gonna get ready and then either meet him downtown which sounds like the best idea rather than going to his place and then so yeah maybe we should do that maybe yeah double date that's not actually a double date we're just content we're just going downtown together going downtown together splitting for dinner and then maybe meeting back up maybe so okay yeah we'll see all right bye guys

Hey guys, it's Brooke. And Danielle from Gals on the Go podcast. It's very minimal change, but basically what I did- Wait, can we talk about the TikTok? Because I saw you deleted it and I need to know. It's like you're bringing it up.

On our show, we talk about everything from college, lifestyle, to navigating your 20s and beyond. And there's always that quote that people say, like, if they like you, you'll know. If they don't, you'll be confused. But some people I don't know. We hope you guys will join us every Wednesday for brand new episodes right here on Podcast One.