Should I buy that thing? A framework to help you decide
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Here's a sampling of subject lines. Time is running out on the best deals of the year. Our biggest sale ends tonight. Last day, $55 off. You deserve it. Take up to $23.43 off your next order. Our sale is still on. Y'all, everybody wants my money.

And yours. The question is, what do I want? And what do you want? How do we actually want to spend our money? There are so many moments of the day where retailers are going to try to sell you stuff. And we at LifeKit thought it was worth coming up with a framework. You know, a should I buy this thing? A list of questions to ask yourself and details to consider before you tap your credit card or click that buy now button.

In this episode, I'll lay out that framework with the help of our experts. And hopefully, it'll help you tune out some of the noise. Seriously, retailers, would you leave me alone? This message comes from NPR sponsor Progressive. What if comparing car insurance rates was as easy as putting on your favorite podcast?

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Whatever point you're at in the buying process, lazily browsing your favorite retailer's website while also watching something on TV or at the store in those aisles right before the register where they place the stuff they want you to buy on impulse, stop and ask yourself, do I need this or do I just want it? This is an important distinction and it's our takeaway one. Asia Evans is a licensed mental health counselor and financial therapist and she's been working

And she says needs are basic. Food, shelter, transportation, health care, clothing, shoes. If you needed to live, like, then that is a need. There's a gray area here, of course, like, for clothing. If you have enough clothing to survive in your environment, but you would just like more, then you're moving into want territory. It's kind of like, yes, I know I have five black sweaters, but...

It doesn't have buttons on it, and I want one with buttons. That is a want. And she says there's nothing wrong with wanting something. I don't want to vilify wanting a better pair of rain boots or wanting a new pair of shoes or wanting to look really fabulous when you, you know, go out with your friends. There's definitely nothing wrong with it, but we need to be able to decipher what the difference between a want and a need is.

Separating the needs from the wants will help you prioritize when you're making purchases with limited funds. And most of us have limited funds. At LifeKit, we've done episodes about budgeting, and you should definitely check those out. What I'll say here is every once in a while, do the math. How much money are you making? Then subtract your fixed costs, whatever you spend on basic needs like housing, groceries, transportation. Also subtract any debt payments you're making for a credit card or a student loan, for instance. What

What's left over? You'll use that to save for an emergency fund or for vacation or for your other financial goals. And what's left after that is your everyday fun budget. Okay, so back to this particular item you're considering. If it falls into the want category, next you're going to ask yourself, why do I want this thing? Maybe you want a new pair of rain boots because it's been raining a lot this year and your sneakers keep getting wet on your walks home. That's understandable. But

But it's worth considering whether you have other reasons. Wanting it because you want people to look at you a certain way and having this item or this piece of clothing may signify something to somebody else. That is when we're starting to get to like, all right, is this for you? Is this for somebody else? Why does that feel important? Does

Does your self-esteem feel better when you feel like you're walking around in the latest and greatest? Like, that's where the juicy stuff starts to happen. This brings us to takeaway two. Before you buy something, pause and check in with yourself. Am I upset right now? Am I trying to celebrate? Yeah, am I...

hungry, angry, lonely, tired. The acronym HALT is pretty popular for people to just kind of take a state of your emotional well-being when you find yourself going into shopping behaviors. I've noticed that sometimes I'm just feeling spendy, like I'm ready to go buy something. Usually it's a little vintage treasure or antique. And if there's nothing I want to buy, then I want to eat some chocolate instead or just do something that feels good.

Sometimes, and maybe y'all can relate to this, I don't actually want to own a new thing. I just want to buy it. To go through the act of discovering it and making a purchase. And that's that also familiar dopamine rush of like searching something out, right? Of hunting for it, if you will. That anticipation is very exciting to our brains. Asia says there are signs that you're shopping as retail therapy rather than because you actually need or even truly want to own a new thing.

I would first look at frequency. How often are you shopping in that kind of way? Is it intentional is another question I would ask. If you find yourself doing this over and over and over and over again, if this is something that's happening multiple times a week, every single weekend you are driving upstate to go to the different antiques to search, then we have to peel back another layer and ask what's going on.

Again, we're not trying to shame ourselves here for feeling spendy or for buying things. But if you're constantly mindlessly spending on stuff you don't even really want, you can undermine your financial goals and make it harder to build a life that you love. Okay, next up, takeaway three is to ask yourself, does this item fit with my lifestyle? And particularly, am I willing to do what it takes to own this thing?

Brian Vines is a deputy editor of special projects at Consumer Reports. On Saturdays, he puts on music and cleans his house. His stairs have carpet on them, and he doesn't have one of those little handheld vacuums, right? He has an old Hoover that he's had for eight years. It still works great. But it's not very good with

going up the stairs because I'm literally holding this big vacuum cleaner, the base in one hand and the handle in the other hand, going on each individual stair. So every week I debate with myself,

"Should I buy a handheld vacuum cleaner to clean these stairs?" And his answer every week is no. I cannot have a single purpose vacuum cleaner in my world. I don't want the expense. I don't want to acquire it. I don't have any place to put it. It is a dialogue that goes on in my brain because I know that things could be easier.

But I'm not willing to take on the real price of that ease. So Brian says if you're considering a purchase, ask yourself, do I have somewhere to put this? Is it going to crowd my closet space? Maybe it will. And that's worth it to you. Factor in what your lifestyle is.

Like, are you a senior who maybe this could be advantageous for you? Do you have limited mobility or strength and dexterity where it's just not possible for you to do what I do with my able-bodied privilege of holding my heavy vacuum cleaner and spot checking the stairs? Now, let's say you want to make an even bigger purchase to get a dishwasher or a new sink or something like that. You got to ask yourself, what will this entail?

And what will the installation cost? How old is your plumbing? Do you really want to get into pulling on this thread if it's going to unravel $2,000 worth of expenses for you with your water line and your electric? Also ask, do I want to deal with the upkeep, especially for appliances? Can I afford repairs and replacement parts?

Before making a big purchase, make sure you understand what repairs would entail. Email the company or ask a sales associate, is this item repairable and what would the process look like? Do I have to call the manufacturer? Is there a local person? Is there an authorized dealer or repair person where I can compare prices? You can also look for info about this in a retailer's frequently asked questions and do a quick search online to see what other people's repair experiences were like.

Once you've decided that you are going to buy an item, a dishwasher, a new pair of shoes, whatever, maybe it's a need or it's a want, but you're okay with that. The next step, takeaway four, shop around, do your research, consider whether this model or product is the right version of this item for you.

First of all, I want to say most purchases are not urgent. So if you find yourself feeling that urgency because of retailers shouting at you in your email inbox or because of all the pretty outfits you've saved on Pinterest, take a deep breath.

especially if this is a want, you have time to mull this over. So you're going to look at reviews of the product, but make sure you're considering a mix of opinions and using resources you trust. The first thing you're going to want to do is not log on to an unboxing video or go to some kind of goofy

experiential review of someone who got paid to do one. Consumer Reports, where Brian works, has dozens of laboratories where their staff put products through their paces. We bought $32 million worth of products last year that we went out with secret shoppers and got just like you or I. We went into stores, put our credit card down, walked out, took them back to the labs. Other journalistic outlets that do this kind of research...

Wirecutter, Good Housekeeping, Popular Mechanics, TechRadar. Now, just a heads up that Consumer Reports and all these other outlets do make money from the purchase links on their websites. What you want to do is make sure you understand how the outlet or reviewer is making money and that you feel okay about that. And there are lots of options for reviewers depending on the product you're looking for.

Brian says you can also ask the people in your life for product recommendations. Call your rich aunt who buys all of the things that you're interested in having and see if she actually likes it. Call the person you know who is the most cost-conscious and ask them the questions.

Consider quality and durability. Like if a product is made from fabric, is this a material that tends to last a long time? Will it quickly pill or become threadbare? If you're not sure, look up the materials. They should be listed in a product description or on the physical product tag.

Also, again, look at reviews. See what other folks have experienced. And whenever you can, take a product for a spin. Let's say it's a mattress. Find out what the return policy is and how long you get to try it out. And as you're looking over specific models and products, make sure you understand a retailer's return and warranty policies. Though Brian tells me you can ask if they'll bend the rules for you, but that's a whole other episode.

Takeaway five, figure out how much you're willing to spend on this product.

I told Brian that lately I've been daydreaming about buying a black velvet blazer. And he reminded me there are a lot of those in the world at many different price points. Is that blazer going to cost you 250 bucks because you went to a sample sale for a brand that usually sells them for twenty five hundred dollars? Or are you going to get that same blazer for sixty dollars?

You do that quick math when you're standing there like, oh, wow.

These shoes look great. I can see there's a little scuff here. I can buff that out or take them to my shoe guy versus, all right, am I going to go down to Zara and get those sparkly new knockoffs from whoever had them on the runway last week?

These are all the calculations that we make daily and oftentimes in 10 seconds while it's in your hand. One thing to remember about price is that more expensive does not always mean more durable or higher quality. Sometimes you're paying for a brand name, but it's all smoke and mirrors, vanity nameplates and fancy design features.

Whether you're talking about a refrigerator or a dishwasher or a TV. The price does not guarantee performance. We've seen that over and over again, and we test for reliability. And sometimes the repair costs on these high-end brands outpace replacement costs on mid-range brands. When you're shopping, also see if you can negotiate down the price. There are different phrases you can use with a sales associate or a customer service rep, like...

Let's say you're buying chairs at a secondhand store. You might ask for a discount for purchasing all four of them. Say something like, can I get all four for $200? And if they say no, you could ask, okay, what about free delivery? And you can always ask if there are any discounts available that day.

Brian says also look at the price matching policies that retailers offer. If you're seeing that a jar of applesauce is more expensive in store than on a retailer's website. Say, hey, online, this says that this applesauce is $1.75, but it's $2 here on the shelf. They'll price match against themselves right there for you.

So make yourself aware of those price matching policies, because like my grandmother said, that money looks a lot better in my pocket than it does in CompuGlobal Megacorp's pocket. It's possible that once you've done the research, you'll realize you can't afford the version of this product that you want to buy right now. But you could if you saved up.

When Brian moved into his first New York City apartment, somebody gave him advice. Don't buy the mid-range table when you want the one that's a bit more expensive, but that you know will last. Go get a folding table that costs $15 instead of a $35 table that you're not going to be happy with and is going to fall apart in six months. Save up your money and buy the one that you want that's the quality one.

All right, our last takeaway starts with a donut. Brian was at the movies recently and he was hit with a donut craving. So after the movie, he and his partner went on the hunt and they walked into a grocery store. They had four glazed donuts for seven bucks and I did not want to pay seven dollars for one donut and I didn't want four. I spoke to the bakery manager and he said, well, you know, all we have is those over there.

So I walked away. I was not going to take a muffin or half a pie or a slice of tiramisu when I wanted one donut. Sometimes the best purchasing decision you can make is walking away. That's takeaway six. I have a personal rule when I'm trying on shoes or clothing. If it's at all uncomfortable in the store, if it's pinching somewhere or it's too tight, it's going back on the rack. If there's any inkling, release it, release it, release it.

If it's not what you want and what is going to fit into your life, walk away. Because they're still making stuff 24 hours a day. And someone is going to make the thing that you want the way you want it at a price that you're willing to pay. Seriously, you can save a lot of money and closet space this way. And it's way better for the environment.

All right, time for a recap. Takeaway one, stop and ask yourself, do I need this thing or do I just want it? This is an important distinction. It'll help you prioritize when you're making purchases with limited funds, which most of us are. Takeaway two, consider your emotions. Are you trying to meet an emotional need by shopping right now? Is this a need you could meet in another way? Take

Takeaway three, ask yourself, does this item fit with my lifestyle? And particularly, am I willing to do what it takes to own this thing? Takeaway four, shop around, do your research, consider quality and durability and whether this model or product is the right version of this item for you. Takeaway five, figure out how much you're willing to spend on this product and, you know, try to negotiate.

And takeaway six, sometimes the best purchasing decision you can make is walking away.

For more Life Kit, check out our other episodes. We've got one on how to save money on groceries and another on starting a financial self-care routine. You can find those at npr.org slash life kit. And if you love Life Kit and want even more, subscribe to our newsletter at npr.org slash life kit newsletter. Also, we love hearing from you. So if you have episode ideas or feedback you want to share, please send us an email at life kit at npr.org.

This episode of Life Kit was produced by Margaret Serino. Our visuals editor is Beck Harlan, and our digital editor is Malika Garib. Megan Cain is our supervising editor, and Beth Donovan is our executive producer. Our production team also includes Andy Tegel, Claire Marie Schneider, and Sylvie Douglas. Engineering support, coach David Greenberg. I'm Mariel Seguera. Thanks for listening.

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