Once Upon a Witchlight | Ep. 43 | Fungi's Night
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Greetings. You're listening to Legends of Avantris. My name is Morning Frost, and this is Once Upon a Witchlight. Here's what happened last time. This stupid piece of silver spool. Are we sure this is all we need? Where once had been the body of Twig is now a small marionette. Bavlorna has clearly made her way up to the attic. E.T.'s a puppet.

Wait, she did something weird happen. Skip it, I is the toy, mistress. You have unclogged my drain, found my lily pad, disposed of the sneaking shadow that attempted to steal, shed light on an individual sent by my sister. Or this freak.

- Six of indolent. - Oh, you have three sisters. - We don't talk about debate. All I require is one additional thing deep in the heart of Woonorch, a giant oak that has fallen onto the ground in the heart of Eadon.

These three is where my sister lives. And at the very heart is a circular room with portraits of all of the sisters. Pavlona, Andalou, Skepiza, and Tasha. I would like for you to take my portrait away and bring it back to me. Wait a minute, Tasha? We have a deal. Break with now, little one. I'm so tired. Oh, hey, Twazy.

little stiff. Okay, you guys follow me then. Just one foot in front of the other until we get past those two trees. The mists part to reveal a primeval forest. As you all begin to change, your bodies begin to shrink and twist. You would all know what these creatures are. A campestry. A mushroom kit. All of you have become one.

The mists part to reveal a primeval forest. A fragrant breeze wafts between the enormous trees, sending motes of pollen dancing into the air. Patches of sunlight kiss the forest floor, and the sweet melody of birdsong echoes all around as your bodies change. Upon stepping into this place, you are no longer the person you were in Hither, but now where you stand is a small mushroom person with an eternal smile plastered across your face.

Your only form of movement are small hops that can be made with your mushroom body. As you attempt to speak out to each other, you realize that your ability to speak any of the languages that you knew previously is altered, but not gone. Your words only escape your smiling lips in the form of song. With this realization, also comes the realization that your movement is not limited to small hops, but can be increased with the art of dance.

You have all found yourself in this enormous forest ahead of you. The pathway that had led into this place from hither is slowly winding away into thither and disappearing into the trees where everything is overgrown. There is no direct route anywhere and the trees are far too tall for you to see which direction is the proper direction to go.

But that is not your immediate concern. Because as you hop around looking at each other, goofy smiles plastered on your face, it is hard to overcome this love of song that you feel billowing up inside of yourself. Unsure of what kind of entity you have found yourself to become, it seems almost core to its nature.

It's music, the song, the dance, and you are almost overcome by it. Do we notice that we're mushrooms? Yeah. And so we- You can speak, but it's sing-songy, or it's actual songs, but you can't just speak outright. Why have we all become turned into mushrooms? What's become of us now? Oh no!

♪ This is the worst one ♪ ♪ Always ♪ ♪ Oh god ♪ ♪ What the fuck ♪ ♪ I don't know about you guys ♪ ♪ I think it's kinda nuts ♪ And I'll bounce forward as I dance. I'll do a little shimmy. You notice that with the pep in your step,

the innate dance of your movements that you are able to propel yourself much further, gaining about plus 10 to your speed. Oh. I apologize if you already said this, but I forget how we were physically traveling as we turned into mushrooms. You were walking. We were walking, okay. With Twig. With Twig. Right. She's also been transformed in this way. Are you looking for Twig? I am.

- That was the bad ass question? - Yes, roll a perception check. - That's where I'm acceptably decent. - I'm gonna be nine. - Darling. - You look around and you see the top of Twig's mushroom hat. She still seems to be strapped to Gideon's back as she had been when you were making your way in here, but she is slumped over on his shoulder. She appears to be asleep.

And so we're like, we don't have legs. No. Do you have arms? No.

Are we moving around? You are literally, you are what's known as the campestry. You have mushroom tops, toadstool caps, and all of your toadstool caps are varying colors. Red, purple, blue, green, whatever color you would prefer for yourself. Brown. Am I still hairy? Am I a hairy mushroom? You know what? Yeah. It's pretty gross, too. I am fuzzy. I'm a fuzzy mushroom. Yes, Hootsie is also a mushroom.

And all of you that have made your way into Thither have transformed into these campestry creatures. And you...

Your face is for the most part smooth. You don't have a nose, all but a small little bump where a nose might be, and just a wide, smiling, jubilantly happy expression plastered on your mouth. Our torsos are stems that we spin around. Yes. And then we move forward. No, you can hop. Oh, we just hop? Yes. Okay, so sort of like the Fantasia Butcher. That's what I'm picturing.

And what has happened to our ear? You imagine that it's still, like, merged into your body, that it's somehow part of you. It's not that you've lost it, but with no arms, you have no access to it. Can we not change our facial expressions? No, you are permanently smiling. Hoochie, you're so cutesy! Hoochie, you're so cute as a mushroom bee! She is smaller than the rest of you by a significant amount. Look at...

Gid, he can't even dance at all. It pains me to look at you. Why is everyone talking like that? Jamona! Oh no, what does it mean? That's perfect. If I could turn back time, if I could find a way, I'd go back to that festival and never come to the Fae. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Cause I found a loophole. My cousin Curtis was in a band called Brain Cream. And he said this one thingy.

And I double beat you. And I just go forward. And you do, you propel yourself very quickly at an additional 10 to your speed. Hey, Twig! You call out to Twig and you get no response. Oh, God. On his back, on Gideon's back, look at back, on Gideon's back.

I can fucking see that. No reason to yell. I'm just trying to figure out what has she done? Sweet Jesus, what has she done? She's a puppet. You're doing that as her diabolos. I can't even contemplate that. Roll a perception check as you are standing next to Gideon.

Big numbers. 12. Okay, the DC was 10. You're standing right next to Gideon. You hop a few times to get a good look and you see that it's not necessarily that Twig is sleeping, but she appears to be completely inanimate. Oh no.

I like use my mushroom stand. Please don't. Please don't. To smack her off Gideon's back. Stop. In the name of love. Before you hurt our friend. I don't stop. You're trying to knock Twig off of Gideon's back. Yeah.

I'm saying this right now just to help you knowing full well that you guys do not have arms or way to pick her back up. Yeah, well, I probably can't do very well Well, you're gonna have to roll for it What we do what would you have someone roll to knock someone off of a back? Yeah, do athletics

Three. Okay, yeah, no, you are not very good at it. You are attempting to do this as you hop up and down, but all you seem to be capable of doing is knocking her torso from one side to the other, and with the sound of clacking wood, you watch as Twig's torso is just flipped from one side to the other, her dangling marionette hands.

the strings and the controls smacking into the ground with every nudge. Tormek wants to know where we're going. This is very concerning. What do you mean?

Well, we went into the woods today and we were in for a big surprise. I guess from a certain point of view, spoken word is like singing. Ain't that right? All you have to do is bob your head. And that's enough. Yeah, just got a musical cadence. We've proven that music is dead! Dead!

Well, what should we do about this? I wanna die. ♪ Cry me ♪ ♪ I think you should follow me ♪ ♪ This is quite easy ♪ ♪ Anyone could do it, even a flea ♪

I'm gonna laugh around these fuckers. Yeah, he's doing laughs and so I point and I'm like... We have to trust in the Gricko. Hurt as it might be. Oh! I think I can probably just speak to this cadence just like the Baron taught me and it's sort of let's I guess just follow Gricko. Walking down the path.

Come on, let's go.

We go forward. Come on, Gideon. Torbjorn is definitely enjoying dancing alongside to keep up with Bricko. You are dancing ahead. I'm not going to freak out. You are dancing ahead, giving in to the musical nature that has come with this new body of yours. It becomes--

Two things become clear to you very quickly. That the forest is getting denser and that the path that you're on is slowly disappearing into nothing and that you will be forced to just venture through the forest with no path to guide you and that Gideon, without the pep in his step, is significantly further behind. Minus 20 to speed. As all he can do is hop and you are minus 10 to your speed. Gideon!

♪ Why does it look like you are trying to traverse ♪ ♪ And not draw the attention of the shy Hulu ♪ ♪ Gideon, your rhythm is gone ♪ ♪ Come on, buddy, don't you giddy up ♪ ♪ Gideon, come on, why don't you giddy up ♪ Guess who's back? Way back here.

Back in the forest. ♪ He already did that one ♪ I couldn't think of anything better. Way back here. Okay, okay, let me try.

Now you can be, say, talk like this and you're gonna point no shucks howdy little greenies. Just do that and then all you can probably just talk like this because you are kind of a shucks howdy cow. I'll see you again a-comin'.

♪ He's coming down the path ♪ Exactly. ♪ Why don't we tie a rope around him ♪ ♪ I guess we don't have arms ♪ ♪ We have some way to drag him ♪ I'm like, "Oh, he's pretending to play air guitar with no arms." It's just blinking a lot. ♪ You should just provide your mushroom stamp to Nudge ♪ ♪ He can't get in alone ♪ You just run up behind him and you just ram into him and knock him forward.

Come on, Beagle Red. Let's mushroom stamp along. I'll just try to push him as I dance behind him, which will hopefully inspire him or just shove him along. Yeah, you're able to shove him along faster. I'll say you could increase the speed to what it normally is, but the rest of you that are dancing forward are still way faster than he is. Well, thanks, Krimmy.

This really helps. He says as he's-- It's real easy. He says as he's headbutt like 20 feet forward. I feel so fast now. It's crazy how much better this is. And skeletons came to life. Their bones are their money.

Their bones are their money. Their bones are their money. What a brave thing to say. What a brave thing to say. He suddenly skilled it. How could you say something so controversial? Oh god, it's really easy. You just talk like this.

We just, so yeah, we just try to-- We continue forward. Yeah, we don't leave Gideon behind. We would never. No, of course, and you find a pace that works for all of you as you begin to make your way through the forest, and as it gets denser and denser. You look up at these trees, and they are unlike any trees that you've ever seen anywhere in the game.

the material plane, let alone in the swamps of Hither. These trees, their bark at first looks like a brown from afar, but as you get close to them, you realize that they're a dark purplish gray and that the bark swirls and twists and

in spirals as it reaches up towards the sky and the branches, instead of spreading out and over the sky, they almost reach up into even more spirals and twists. The leaves on them shimmer with

technicolors as you look at them. Though they look to be green at first glance, the more that you look at them, you realize that the veins in the leaves themselves are almost pulsing with different colors. And it is quite beautiful.

But aside from that, you notice nothing else strange about this forest. You hear the sounds of birds and animals throughout the wild. None of them seem drawn to you or bothered by your presence here in the forest. And it is, for the most part, quiet as you look towards the sky and see that the day is fading. You're about midway through the afternoon and heading towards twilight and

You have at this point probably been traveling for a few hours now. You would expect with the amount of motion you've been propelling your bodies forward, the dance and the song, that you would be exhausted if you were in your normal skin suits. But you don't feel exhausted at all. But you have not found any signs of civilization at all. Hey guys, a thought occurred to Tormek. What is that, Tormek?

♪ Torbjörn's a big hairy mushroom ♪ ♪ Kind of like Torbjörn's big hairy mushroom ♪ ♪ I think I understand your meaning ♪ ♪ But could you try rephrasing ♪

It's kind of been mixed company Torbjörn isn't very comfortable talking about Torbjörn's penis Oops! Oops, you did it again You mentioned your junk Sorry

Go ahead. No, I was going to ask, is the-- I need you to describe-- is the forest still as dense as it was and there's just no-- it's not continuing to get denser, it's just it reached a level of density? I will show you a map of Thither, just ignore what--

names you see because those are irrelevant to you guys. To give you an idea of how thick the canopy of trees is. Oh wow. That's all trees. That is all trees. Oh fuck. You are traveling through them. You have come-- You so far have seen no landmarks. You've seen no signs of mountains, no signs of rivers. You imagine with the vegetation the way it is that there has to be some sort of running water

there has there should be some sort of mountains um but so far and just the aimless traveling that you've been doing you have come across nothing like normal height transportation travel we've gone like no you're so yes you you've turned into mushrooms but you're not like

You're not this big. Am I a seven-foot tall mushroom? Because I'm really am when Tormek's a big hairy mushroom. You're about the size of Twig. Oh! The movement that you've gained is faster than your walking speed at your normal height. So you've actually been traveling much deeper into this forest than you would have had you not changed. Okay, I'm down with that.

Does Twig seem the same? She still seems to be inanimate. And if we don't feel tired at all, have we seen any other life? Are there birds? Are there squirrels? You can hear them, but you haven't seen any. I look for aminals. Roll a perception check. I just have not rolled above a 10 in like three weeks. Perception, 13.

You spot a purple bird. It looks similar to a blue bird, but purple. And slightly smaller with a soft pink belly. And you look up towards it. And it's nestled into a nest in one of the trees above your head. And it took you a minute to...

to really pick out its sound in the plethora of animal noises and just nature sounds that are echoing all around you in this place. But you are able to spot it, and the bird seems to spot you as its head turns this way or that, looking at you, almost intrigued by you. As you watch it fly up into the canopy of the trees, grab a couple of twigs and continue to build its nest. Hey, bird!

"Mr. Heybert! "Come down here and me has some questions for you. "Heybert!"

Roll an animal handling check and disadvantage. You're like intentionally going, "Hey, vert." I'm just trying to scare him. You need to use Torbec to start bird calls. That's the problem. So 10 plus, oh my god, I don't have my character sheet up. Oh my god. Who would've thought we were playing to you today? Someone else vamp for me.

Vant for me, Vant for me. Are you proficient? Come on, man. Vant for me. Yes, what did you roll? 10 plus five. 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18. 18. You have a plus eight? Yeah, he's a big hairy mushroom. He's done plus proficiency. Holy moly. ♪ Mushroom ♪ ♪ Dormant big hairy mushroom ♪ I can't believe that you have a plus three proficiency when you're only level three. Mushroom. Can't imagine.

Hey, bird! The bird does not fly away, as anyone watching this scene would have expected it to with the loud noises shouted up at it. It seems to be quite interested now that it's gotten your, or now that you've gotten its attention, it seems to be quite interested in the five of you, almost as if noticing something maybe you don't notice. I will endeavor to

Look around to see if I notice if it's paying attention to something near us or just to try to deduce what roll a perception check I'm gonna go with this. Tormek, big hairy mushroom. I'm just like over and over again. Tormek is just talking about being a big hairy mushroom. Can I twist this? Twist it. You got twists. Let's take a chat. Tormek, big hairy mushroom. That's better. 16. 16? 16. You look around. You...

You hop around in circles looking all around you and your friends and back up to the bird. You notice that as you move, the bird's head moves slightly with you, almost as if following your movements. And it's very clear to you that there's nothing else that this bird seems to be interested outside of the five of you. Hey bird, tell us what we're missing. Hey bird, please tell us where to look. Hey bird, we really need a handful.

I'm sorry, is that offensive that I said hand and not wing? He's a bird. I don't know why you're purple. Because? Because biologically you look like you should be blue. Oh, I guess not just blue, but also orange and white.

Why do they not call blue birds blue orange white birds? It looks like it's not a blue bird. That's really, I guess, what I should expect from the paywall. Oh, dude, did Audra keep using the Cisco music? I am going, I should make you roll an insult check. Just see how insulted this thing is. I roll a persuasion check at disadvantage. Can I try to help?

How? I rolled double threes. Doesn't matter. I will twist. Mushroom. That's cocked. That is literally cocked. Mushroom. Fuck. Oh, persuasion? That is a 16. Okay. You...

You continue to sing this song as the bird moves its head this way or that. Eventually, it takes flight. This fucking fly, man. I know. I told you we had to go on an adventurous hunt before we started and we forgot.

Like, hold on. What were we saying? Oh, yes. Persuasion. The bird takes flight and begins to fly down towards you. And it begins to flap its wings to hold itself, hovering in the air just a little bit above your faces, looking directly at Gricco. And though this bird is flapping its wings, the air about it is almost one of frustration before you hear.

You know I can't tell you what you're asking me if you won't stop talking. How can I ask you if I don't talk? You can ask a simple question and let me respond to it. You don't have to ask 15 in a row. And yes, it is offensive to call me a bluebird when I hear you're not a bluebird.

I don't need background song. ♪ Sorry, I'm just not used to being a mushroom guy ♪ That's very clear. Obviously you're not Ken Pestry. I'm not sure what you are, really. ♪ Tormek is a big hairy mushroom ♪ Well, right now you are. ♪ I think he's going for the Cisco hold music ♪ I'm sorry, what? ♪ You've never heard, you've never been on hold ♪ ♪ And they use the Cisco phone services ♪ You're obnoxious.

What are you doing in my forest? Greetings, apologies for all my friends now. I'm sorry for all of my friends now. These are my friends, but I apologize. I know they can be quite offensive. This is Cremi, this is Gideon, and this is Torbek, and this is Gricko. I'm, uh, Frost, but you can call me Morning Frost, yes. So, wait, can I call you Frost or Morning Frost?

Either it's fine, I have to start all over-- Please do not start all over, Michael! It's very extremely confusing. What happened to you? If you could help us, please, we have nowhere to go and hide. Are you new here? Yes, we are very new here. How did you get to Feather? It's a very long story, I'm sorry. I don't want to listen to you while you're singing it. We went into a hut that walked. You don't sing. It was pretty easy, actually.

Even though we did a whole quest, we didn't really need to do that quest. We just wanted to do it anyway. All right. And what were your questions again? I don't have much time. Nighttime is coming and my nest isn't finished. We can perhaps help if you take us with you. We need shelter and not to be eaten. It won't fit in my nest.

Well, tell us where it is and perhaps we can assist you. So you can kill me? No, I won't let you hunt me. How would we kill you with these simple fungal bodies? It's like right up there. Stop it! Don't look up there. That's my bedroom. Peeping Tom. I told you before, his name is Cremmy. Peeping Cremmy? Creeping Cremmy.

You asked me 15 questions, one right after the other. What were they? ♪ How do we stop being fancy mushrooms ♪ ♪ Funky mushrooms ♪ Oh, you're going to have to find someone to take away whatever curse this is that you have on you. It's very clear to me that you're not as you should be. No, she put a spell on us, and now we're shrooms. Who did? She put a spell on us. The one he called Gideon.

I'm not going to stand for the doll again. You're trying to tell me that the puppet put a spell on you. Well, someone did. Your brain scrambled. Can I cast spells? You haven't tried. I just try to summon a presentation out of my cap.

You watch as Kremi tries to summon this Presididitation, and the only expression that you can make is a smile. The smile gets wider and wider and wider, his face gets redder and redder and redder, and nothing happens.

This is little green to purple bird. How can we break this curse? I'm not sure I can do it because I'm simply a bird. However, if you go through the trees to the west, probably about 15 minutes, I would say very close to the water, you'll find a large rock.

It's sitting at a 45 degree angle, which from what I hear is really cool with kids. Okay. And so if you go to that rock, directly beneath it is a pixie campsite. Okay. There were three pixies there earlier today making a ruckus. Okay. And pixies have magic. You could ask them for help. I would recommend you be a little less yourselves when you meet them. It's warm, eh?

She knows!

You came in too early, frosty lad. Your sense of timing. Oh, that would be sandwich. I can't say that. That was more of a side, like a Greek chorus. Anyways...

♪ Fly us to the Pixies ♪ ♪ Take us far away from here, please, God ♪ I would be happy to, for a price. ♪ All right, fellas, what are we thinking? ♪ Maybe a nibble on our mushroom caps. Oh, I don't want to eat you, you disgusting, filthy thing! ♪ More, because Torbjörn is interested ♪ ♪ Torbjörn is going to volunteer ♪ I don't want to eat your hair, I guess

And she flies up one more foot. No! Stop it, stop it, no! You don't like mushrooms. It's not that I don't like mushrooms, I don't want to eat people. Well, from a certain point of view, we're not really people, are we? We're puppets. It's Twigsy for sale. Just rat.

Just speak to a rhythm. Yeah, all you gotta do is speak to a rhythm. Listen to your parents and go to school. Throw eight ounce drugs and don't do sleep. Fuck, I messed it up. I messed it up again.

"Dude, see, cover your ears. "All you gotta do is talk like that, and that is music." After the early '90s, maybe the late '80s, it really brought a downfall of melody in song. See, I told you, 45 degree angles are really cool. Well, no. Yes, they are. No, I mean, Twigsy is not for sale.

from any point of view. When did Gid get so talkative? I've never seen him this talkative before. Bird, can you please help us understand how to get rid of this sing-song thing? I'm trying to help you. Because we're wasting away again in the Feywild. Oh! Looking for a way to break this curse. So as I was trying to tell you, weird fireman,

I need to help you for a price. I'll take whatever you want. Take it all. But not twig. Twig is not for sale. Don't worry, it's still just a mushroom. I can have whatever I want. That isn't twig or the doll. They're one and the same. All right. Should we... Well, we can't really shake on it because you don't have wings and I don't have a strange mushroom body. I can...

We can bump noses, my beak and your little nose. Torbek thinks he should probably clarify before we go bumping noses.

Okay, well, you can't have whatever you want. That was maybe, I spoke too quick because I hate singing. Night is slowly approaching and I really need to finish my nest. So if you can't figure out something to barter with me, then you're going to have to do this on your own. Why? And unfortunately, they're the moves, so the directions that I gave you will change shortly. A, you're amazing. B, you're sober.

That's true. C. Can you take us to the place that we want to go? D. We'll deliver something after we've been transformed. I'm not an idiot. I'm not going to make a kind of deal where I give you something first. E. Tell us what you're into. Would you take an IOU? That's not how this works! Even with a promise?

You're not very creative, are you? You would think as campestries, at least once inside those bodies, you'd have a bit of, I don't know, artistic flair, creativity. D in there. Why don't we all put on a great opera? I'm already tired of hearing you sing. You would like to hear now

Tell us what you want! I already told you. You were very cryptic about it! And we don't want to get trapped in our Fey Pact! I'm sorry, that's how these things work. F. We're in the Feywild. G. We could give you something as a promise.

Could we offer you a stylish jig? I've watched you dance and sing for the past 20 minutes. You gave that to me for free. Oh, fuck. Ain't we beyond the hook for all the things we promise you now? What? I. An IOU is totally sufficient. But an IOU of what?

Do you need someone dead? You're still not telling me, no! Someone killed? No. Dead and killed are the same things. Do you need some money? No. What about... Let me check my mental inventory. You're not going to survive in hither very long if you can't think of things to barter with. You must have not run into much of that in hither. How about some cards? Some cards? I do like the colors on cards. Especially hearts. Three cards for you.

Could they all be hearts? Do you have a king of hearts? A queen of hearts? Let me just check my mental memory here. J, that would be just the trick. What about a jack of hearts? K, and a king of hearts. How about a fairy dragon for you, my dear? You have a fairy dragon? On one card. Yes, I do. I was hoping for the heart suit. I could make that happen. Just fold one, I owe you.

L, you'll love it in your nest. I got my heart set on three cards. Well, I'm not quite sure. I wrote fake three dragon anti-card depicting a fairy dragon. I'm not sure what I meant by that. Maybe it's a three? I got three on it? I don't know. I'm not sure. M, might I also add a long scroll of parchment?

I'm going to do with a scroll of parchment. I have wings. And you can use it for your nest. Ooh, I do like that. Oh, or I could give you a net made of

That was anticlimactic. ♪ Pee, please, this is very hard ♪ ♪ We're working with what we've got to give ♪ I don't know why you thought traveling through the Feywild would be easy. I got sycamore seeds. ♪ Yes, that's the question I've been asking ♪ I got a sycamore seed, I got fingernails. Oh, I love sycamore! I got things you ain't even seen. Can I see them? I don't have access on them.

Currently. ♪ How about an eye? ♪ ♪ It's cool, it's neat ♪ ♪ A varnished eye from a displacer beast ♪ ♪ Cool eye, would you like it? ♪ ♪ Cool eye, there'd be a lot of churches ♪ ♪ Cool eye ♪ What about you? You said I could have anything that I wanted. You clearly had an idea of what you could give me for my sexes. No, I had no idea. I was just real frustrated and I got bamboozled.

By myself. What about a bit of your fire? Can I create fire right now? You've been on fire this whole time. No, like I said, I know that you're not campestry. I can see a bit of each of you inside of those mushroom bodies. Oh, man. It's a big hairy mushroom. So you can see that we're capable?

And that were not just mushroom guys. I can't quite tell what you are, but I can see that you're quite shadowy. And you, your brain is different. R is for really smart. And you, and you are hairy. Torbjorn. It's to be hated. There are two of you in there. Huh? Oh, Torbjorn doesn't like the sound of that. And you...

You are part of nature. One with it, some would say. The Feywild likes you. I'm not used to being a mushroom. I'm more of a monster guy. I'm a monster guy. I'm really a monster guy. Mushrooms aren't my thing, but I can help however you mean. So would you give me some of your fire?

Clearly there's some part of the puzzle that we're not picking up on, so just say yes, kid. Why are you talking about a puzzle? Just sort of meta sort of thing.

Yeah, sure. You can have as much fire as you want that I can spare that wouldn't kill me. Or less than that, less than that, based on Torbjorn's reaction. Some of your fire. No, just a very little bit, the bare minimum I can offer while-- She said she only wanted some. He's got genie blood. No, no, no.

No, no, no. Oh, I take it back. Just the smallest amount you can take while we can get through this puzzle. Let's make this pact then. Okay. And she'll fly up to you and she places her beak on the small spot where your nose would be. And she says, As it is said, so it shall be. Do you agree?

You immediately feel some of the warmth in your body, that heat from the core of who you are, lessen. You watch as this once purple bird turns into a beautiful red, orange, and yellow. The plumes on her tail elongate and her wings get a little bit larger. Her beak becomes a beautiful golden, like the gold of the sun. Oh, I'm so lovely now! Hmm.

"I can do. "All right, I'll show you where to go." ♪ Fly us to the pixies ♪ ♪ We'll follow behind ♪ ♪ We don't need to speak any further ♪ ♪ We'll just do it in silence ♪ "All right, but I'm going to go very quickly, "so make sure you can keep up." And she immediately darts off into the treeline. I need you all to roll, I'm going to say,

Athletics or acrobatics to try and make it through the forest as quickly as she. 15. Performance. I'm twisting it. Yeah, I'm twisting it. I'll twist it. It's cold in here. Why is it not loading? Athletics or... 25. Ooh, 24. 19.

Did anyone roll below a 13? No. I got a 20, I think? Let me try. Hootsie as well, obviously. 19. I'm going to twist for Hootsie. One more twist. One more twist. Thanks, brother. These are weird. It's okay. They'll bust in your mouth, watch out. Torbjorn. "Likes when they bust." Right, Torbjorn.

That is a 14. You're good? Am I good? Yes, that's good. Okay. You dart through the trees, following after this bird. The change that has come over her after the pact that she's made with Gideon

making it much easier for you to see her as she almost glows with a fiery radiance as she shoots through the tree line and you are able to keep up. A few of you staying behind Gideon every time he starts to drop back with his inability to dance, you will headbutt him forward into the very front of the line and you continue to do this until you eventually find yourselves

In a small clearing, you see the rock with the 45 degree angle and behind it, the rushing waters of what appears to be a stream as it makes its way through the trees. And at first, you see nothing else as the bird slowly comes to a stop and once again positions herself in front of your faces.

"Just as promised. I can't guarantee the Pixies are still about, but this is where they were last. Thank you for the deal that you made, and maybe we'll see each other in the future. New friends, and good luck." I said, "Thank you, pretty bird." I said, "Thank you, pretty bird." I said, "Thank you, pretty bird." Thank you, pretty bird. She spins in the air.

unnaturally, in a way that she shouldn't be able to move in the air with her wings the way they are and being a bird the way she is, is with a soft pop and a flash and a little bit of smoke, you see her pop out of existence. Where she has gone to, who knows? But you are where you were told you were supposed to be.

And as you look around the clearing, at first, you are met with disappointment, as it is very clear that at one point, Pixies had been here, there had been a fire going, and they had been up to some bit of shenanigans.

And then you hear the sound of clattering pots as behind the rock, you watch as one, two, three pixies spill out from behind it, all of them struggling with a,

what looks to be a normal sized backpack, the kind of pack an adventurer would have. And the three of them are trying to maneuver it and pull out human sized pots to drag over to the fire clearly in an attempt to make some sort of food.

all the while struggling because they're holding onto a piece of wood, which for those of you that have been in a material plane is clearly a doorstop. It's about six inches long, but they are handling it with reverence as if this is something special. And you watch as the three of them try to maneuver this piece

piece of wood while also trying to get the pots over to the now extinguished fire. And you immediately hear one of them. Oh god, the fire went out when we told you you were supposed to tend to it, Spider Lily. What do you mean I was supposed to tend to it? How am I supposed to tend to the fire when I'm trying to help you carry this incredible troll's toothpick? I told you it's not a troll's toothpick. I know what it is. It's a retreatant.

And you listen as they argue back and forth about whatever this piece of wood is as they continue to move things over. And they all sit down around this small pixie fire and they put the piece of wood on a rock that had clearly been moved over almost in a place of reverence as they begin to huff and puff at the fire, not even taking any notice to you as they attempt to get it lit and still fumble with the cooking utensils.

Hello? Oh, God! It's you we've been looking for. Hello? I can see it in your eyes. I'm horrified. That you want to cook some food. Oh, yeah, that's true, but I'm also horrified. We can help you if you transform us back to our normal selves. Is this a singing episode?

Yes. Yikes. Hi. Um, you're not gonna hurt us, right? No. No, no, we are not gonna hurt you. No, no, no, not gonna hurt you. With a smile firmly plastered on his face like that, I want to believe him, but it's all so eerie.

Oh yeah, it is so good. Cowslip, what do you think? Are they safe? They're clearly not themselves. Look at them. You can see their essence inside. The one that's called herself Spider Lily stands up and turns to the others. You manage the fire. Keep watch over the troll's toothpick and try and get dinner started. I'll deal with these fellas.

and she flits over and flies in front of you in a similar manner to what the bird did as she's looking out around all of you. So how did you come to find yourself in this predicament? ♪ I'm an alligator ♪ ♪ We're a bunch of carnies needing some help ♪ ♪ We came into the Feywild ♪ ♪ And then we got turned into mushroom cells ♪ Oh no, did you walk through one of the fairy circles on your way in? Oh no.

Whoever led you here was doing you a disservice. We must have stepped into a fairy circle, oh yeah. And we had to get help from a purple bird. Oh gosh, Granny Nightshade's been messing with those fairy circles. They're doing the ones that have been affected are doing some weird things. They can't even travel to the material plane anymore. There are only a few of them now that actually can get you back to where you're from.

Granny Nightshade, that doesn't sound familiar to me. Well, that's fine. I can go ahead and help you for a price. We got witches. They're multiplying. And it's out of control. What were you thinking for us to be providing? Oh, that's for you to decide.

You're not really familiar with how these fay packs work, are you? I offer to do something nice for you and then you do the work of thinking of what you're gonna do to pay me for it. How about... What if we tell you what that thing is? What? The Troll's Toothpick. We know it's true nature, it's true purpose. No, you don't.

- Well, I do. - You're implying it's not even a troll's toothpick, of course it is. - And you hear one of the other pixies call over. - No, it's not, I told you, it's a bench for mice. - What if I told you we knew what that was? Will you get us out of this predicament? - It's a troll's toothpick. - I can guarantee you it's not. - And it has magical properties you can tell me about? - Yes.

From a certain point on. All right, I'll take that deal. All right. What do you say? Won't you shake a poor sinner's cap? And I'll lean my head towards her. She moves towards your face, similar to what the bluebird did, and she puts her nose up against your nose. As it is spoken, so it shall be. Do you agree? I do indeed. And just as this happens,

you immediately feel your body begin to change as the pixie's magic fulfills her end of the pact and all of you return to your normal form. Yeah! Are you ready? Oh my gosh, you're all so much bigger than I thought.

Greetings. Are we able to talk normally? Mm-hmm. Oh, fuck! I can't believe I had to talk so much in a sing-song voice. I can't believe-- aw, I was just getting started. Yeah, I feel like I had more on the tank, too. Yeah, me too. Oh, that was so fun. I had a really good idea. Thank you so much! Oh, you're welcome. Spider Lily? Yeah, I'm Spider Lily. Over there's Cow Slip, and then there's Maypole.

Can we call you SL for short? Sure. You guys remind Tormek of a fling he had many years ago. Oh, I don't want to be flung anywhere. No, it was lovely. The best five minutes of Tormek's life. Well, I'm glad to hear it. Maybe you'll tell me about it sometime. Tormek would love that.

You have a really nice voice. I think you tell great stories. Oh, thank you. You're welcome. Grimmy, I'm speaking to you in your mind now.

I have to say that because we might turn this into a podcast later. And I guess the viewers at home can't see that you're placing your two first fingers on your forehead. That's right, that's important. I can respond to this message, right? Yes, you can. Do you have an idea for what magical property you're gonna deceive the pixies about in a moment? Because I have a suggestion. You think I make a deal without a fucking plan? Sometimes, yes. Anyways, why don't we make good on that deal? What do you think? Yes, your turn to fulfill it.

That is not a piece of cake for a troll, it's not a-- No, it's a slice of cake made for a treant. Or that's at least what Maypole thinks. I think it's a troll's toothpick. MP, get out of here, MP. And Cowslip thinks that it's an exercise bench for mice. Zax, you lose a magical artifact used by the great Dunamancers of Antris. I need you to roll a wisdom saving throw.

You may not twist this one, by the way. You could use a dragon. No, you just, it's a fey pack. He's breaking a fey pack. No I'm not, I'm finished. It's not true.

I mean, who's the set anyway? The magics of the Fae knows what's true and what's not. The magics of the Fae require you to fulfill the pact as it's told. As he turns into the mom from Full Metal Alchemist. As you begin to say this, you begin to feel exhausted. You take one level of exhaustion. I'm sorry, what were you saying?

It's a door stop. It's a door stop. Okay, whatever its magical properties. It stops gravity against the door. I'm sorry, what? Would I see he's struggling? Yeah. It's all in how you phrase it, Crummy. You can tell them that it has the magical spell Hold Portal, that it keeps doors open by its very merit, its physical and material presence. A barrier of sorts. You fucking tell them that.

My friend Kremi is right. It is referred to as a doorstop, but its physical presence creates a barrier that holds portals open. Doors, other doors, and varieties. What kind of magical word do you have to use to keep portals open? That's the trick.

It is one of the few magical items that you have to say nothing to in order for it to work. You simply place it in its position, and then there is no somatic component. Verbal component. It's never worked that way for me. Usually you gotta put it in, you gotta give it a kick and say, FUCKING STAY! It works differently for the different users. How would it work for me?

Well, you'd have to try it. You'd have to find a door, attempt to wedge it underneath, and if you gave it a command or something like that and it held, you'd know that that was the command word that was right for you. Roll a deception check. Good lord. This one. Deception? That's where I'm a plus zero. 17! Oh, let's go, baby. Okay. Oh, really? So you're saying it's a human?

It's not for trolls or mice? It's used on the mortal plane by a variety of races. Humanoid. It's humanoid. Humanoid. Oh, I see. And I... You wedge it in a door and it keeps portals from being opened. It holds the portal open. The door itself. So do you have to have a portal open first? Depends on whether or not you want to hold the portal open or closed. It would work both ways.

Oh. Works better keeping them open. That's true. Do we have any doors nearby that we'd be able to demonstrate? Not out here in the forest. At least not in this area. If we got closer into, I don't know, a town or a small village or something maybe, but not here. Are there small villages nearby?

Not necessarily. Depends on the time of day. Well, Spider Lily, you seem extremely intelligent. I'm sure you'll be able to get it quickly without any additional tutorial or instructions from me. That's exciting to know. We could probably end this conversation very quickly. That's very exciting to know. Are we good? Are we on the deal thing? Why don't we help you get your meal going? Oh, I would love that

I love that very much. We got a professional chef here, we got a professional fire guy, fire puncher, hey? I hate the bot. Oh yeah, you look great. I'm a little beat. Look at you, you're a tad bit fiery, aren't ya? Yeah, I'm a little less. And you are all drawn to Gideon, and you see that the flames that used to lick at his beard have completely extinguished. The redness in his beard is gone, it is just a simple, dark brown beard.

the embers that were burning in his hair significantly less. Oh, Gideon! And his skin has gone from red to... You're really having a tour back day. We're gonna have to call you Gideon. How are you feeling, Gideon? When she took your fire, you went from like a shiitake mushroom to a paloma. What do you mean? What kind of mushroom's a paloma?

I've never really heard of shiitake either, to be fair to you, but I've definitely never heard of the paloma mushroom. Uncle Bobo used to use them. He used to use paloma mushrooms? Yep.

The use of it is stinking cheese. Danking Graco's Ease Nuts joke is the greatest thing that's ever happened in this campaign. I'm like the meme of that guy with the-- He's in the maze. Yup. Yup.

I don't know, Gil, I don't think it looks that bad. You look distinguished, you know, a little bit of something. Wait, what happened? What happened? I'm feeling a little weaker, and I don't like it. Oh, well, you know, that deal that we made is you just traded a little bit of something, and now we don't have to fucking sing anymore. Thank God. Hashtag worth. What? Is my beard not on fire? Gideon, I recommend you examine your reflection in the stream. There's... Did I go to the stream? Yeah, there's a stream behind the rock. Well, fuck you!

I say to my reflection. A fish in the water says, "All right, fuck you too, buddy." Oh fuck, I walk away from this tree. I've got no interest in talking to you. Fuck you! You have an entire golem scene. Go away and never come back!

Oh, man, how come when I make a deal, I lose my dancing, which is all I know, and then also part of my beard, my daggone life essence is ripped out of my nose by some stupid fucking purple bird that should have been blue, and your eyes just turn gray.

He just can't tell a joke! And I'm dying! It was kind of vague how she worded it, you know what I mean? I mean, can you tell? Do you feel weaker? Do you feel-- I try and produce flame in my hand. You're able to easily.

Well. Oh, you're not dying. Torbeck manages every single day, one day at a time. And Gideon can, too. Oh, now I've got something in common with Torbeck. Yay! Yay!

Yeah! You guys can relate together. Oh, hold on. I think I still got something from the carnival. I'll reach in my pack and I'll pull out a separate compact with some rouge in it. I want to just hold still for a second. Okay. I just basically apply rouge all over his face so it's closer to his old red tone.

What do you think? Gideon, why do you have that? I don't know. You never know. You need a disguise. That's from Guys Night. What do you think? From a certain point of view. You look great, Gideon. You look like a clown and a prostitute and a baby.

Oh, speaking of guys. Hey, hang on, fuck you!

Clown. This is actually great, you're laughing. I am on the ground, and you, Mothu, say thank you to the Nostradian. Oh, come on, fellas, he looks fine. You did great, Gideon. Well. Oh, maybe it's those drunk clowns that he kept accidentally killing finally getting their revenge. It's only been like four of them, man, I think.

Yeah, it's been four, right? Yeah. I don't know. Hey, you never know. You always said that they was powerful or something. I get a little nervous as I sit up. I mean, yeah, we should definitely not talk about that. All right, what are you cooking for dinner? Well, we was just going to make a little bit of coral fish.

Oh, they're on that here too? Oh yeah, they're in the river behind us. We were gonna take a net and catch a couple of them. I know a pretty mean recipe for a carfish stew. Do you want to make it for us? It is literally award-winning. Critics acclaimed. Literally critically acclaimed. Carfish stew is what I'm saying. I could. What would you trade for it? Well, to be fair, we can make our own carfish if we wanted to. Oh, I was trying to be nice and you know how the Feywild works.

I offer to do something nice for you and you offer to do something nice for me? Yeah, I could do something nice for ya. Grammy's also the winner of Electrum Chef! What's that?

Very popular cooking competition in Downfall, where we've just been. Yes, and technically, the competitor had his head blown up. That's what technically-- I won fair and square. Oh, yeah. It really blew away the competition. Yeah. And that was basically Frost that did that, so that has nothing to do with me or my award. What do you think? Yes, that was my fault.

I could tell you how to use the fairy circles, the ones that are broken. Oh. Oh. That sounds fair. Could you maybe throw in some of his flame back, you know? Oh, can you do that? A little bit of burgundy, add a little bit of rouge to him. I personally couldn't give you some of your fire back, but cowslip can. She's a summer pixie.

Oh. Oh. It's getting a little cold up here. Cowslip. Cowslip. Mm-hmm. Yes. Yeah. Cowslip. And Maypole. Maypole. Mm-hmm.

Those are lovely names. Maples from the spring. I see, spring, and then you are from the-- Why? I'm autumn. You look like an autumn. Do you guys know a Riata Flagg? And has she mentioned Torbeck at all? I don't know, I've never heard of someone named Riata Flagg. Okay, thanks anyway. You're welcome. I'm about to ask, why do they call you Spiderlily when I--

Looking at her, I guess I didn't describe them. Their names very much describe what they look like. They very clearly look like they come from the parts, the areas of the fey that they have described. Spider Lily's hair twists into the shape of a spider lily and all of their hair

into the shape of different flowers. Her skin is a beautiful pale blue with hints of grays in it. Cowslip is a soft pink.

and maple is a mint sea foamy green. Oh. Oh! Following Torbeck's line of questions, because this is our first time here, do you know a Mrs. Busty? And if so, has she mentioned Griggo? I've never heard of anyone named Mrs. Busty, sorry. No.

Torvmang is also disappointed. It's okay, Torvmang. What kind of fake creature is this busty in this Riata flag? Oh, they're all pixies. Those aren't pixie names. Well, they weren't seasonal pixies. They were just regular-- What do you mean? Every pixie comes from a season.

Well, we did meet them technically on the material front. Are you sure they were real pixies? Oh no, Torben is not sure at all. What kind of flower do each of them represent?

Torbjorn thinks back really hard to all those years ago at the carnival when he was trapped on the Ferris wheel with Riadaflag. Does she have any kind of flower motif to her? I would say you were up close and personal with Riadaflag. She did not. She was wearing just standard clothing.

Nothing like these pixies at all. And as you look at them, you realize that the pixies that you met at the Witchlight Carnival were much more humanoid than these pixies. These pixies' ears come to a long taper. You notice that Spider Lily has moss on

in and up and around in her hair and bits of her outfit are made from bark and acorns and flowers and things and her fingers are elongated and just a little bit

more fantastical. Whereas the pixies that you met at the Witchlight Carnival were much like the pixies that you would have read about in a fairy tale book, is if they were crafted to look exactly like you would expect a pixie to look.

Well, I mean, she wasn't flower. She was still plant-related. I think she was a watermelon pixie. I'm not sure. I've never heard of a watermelon pixie before. So maybe summer. Summer pixie. Maybe summer. You know? It's impossible. Anyways. Dormag loves melon.

Does Cowslip have a favorite dish that maybe we can trade her for Gideon's heat dance? I think you could just ask her. All right, well, what do you think, fellas? Should we make ourselves at home? I think if you're making dinner for all of us, I could give you some information about the-- I could give you some information about the fairy circles. Oh! Maypole could give you some information that could help you out in Thither.

And then cowslip could give you a bit of your fire back.

Let me ask the girls and see what they think. Just one minute, okay? All right. And she flies off and they all begin to huddle and you see that they occasionally look up and look back at you and point at you with their long spindly fingers and they look at you a couple of times and giggle and you see cowslip blush or pink skin goes from a baby pink to her cheeks become a bright red and she then huddles back down and continues to talk with the girls. And eventually Spider Lily comes back and says,

It's a deal we've agreed to make. All right. I mean, should we discuss the terms in terms of what we're cooking? Just want to make sure that I can provide. The deal is as such. In exchange for Gideon's fire bat, for information on the fairy circles that are uncorrupted, and additional information in regards to Fy'ra that could help you,

You are exchanging for us a large bowl of award-winning call fish stew. All right, okay. That seems fair for Torbjorn. All right, what do we think? That seems quite clear. Very fair, very fair. Do you mind if I just discuss with my compatriots? No, not at all. Thank you.

And she just flies there. Torbjorn was really worried it might involve butt stuff. Oh, thank goodness! It's not too late to add butt stuff! I'm right here, you don't have to yell at me. Oh, sorry. I realize as I'm huddling that my hand is right by Torbjorn's ass. You look over and Kel flips to . Are we still within earshot?

She didn't move away. All you asked was if you guys could talk about it. All right, shift, shift. Everyone huddle. Can we all please stay huddled? We have a sidebar.

Alright fellas, I just want to make it very fucking clear, this is a dangerous fucking situation, you understand? I agree to this. And if it's not up to their standards, I mean, they already zapped like half my life for us and all I did was try to make a cute, clever joke. I agree. Their definition of what big for the Big Bowl could be wildly out of context from what we think it is. I mean, you literally have to just create...

the same caulfish that you made, which is award-winning. It doesn't matter how good it is. If you make it any different, even if it tastes better, that is wrong. So then you would be breaking the Fey Pact, and so just make the same recipe. Here's the problem. The recipe had two things that I don't know if I have access to. Oh yes?

Tell me you didn't put Beezleberries in there, Grumby. Of course I put Beezleberries in there. Oh, Grumby! Where are we gonna find Beezleberries? Oh, we're doing-- At this time of year? Oh, did you say Beezleberries? There's a Beezleberry bush, like, I don't know, 10 minute walk from here. Oh, that's great. We require children. What's the other ingredient? The other ingredient

is through some of that Witch's Brew, patent-pending, into that. Torbec's got plenty of that, right? Didn't you just milk it from Torbec? You talking about that mushroom? No, I'm talking about I'll plant the canisters on Torbec's back. You can milk just about anything with nipples. Torbec has nipples. Oh, you need the canisters. Do you think you could provide a little more?

I'm fresh out. Torbek can try, but Torbek might not be responsible for what happens after.

Alright, as long as somebody else offers the Beezleberries, I'm in. I'm in wishy-wishy, can happen. We'll go get the Beezleberries. Yeah! Are you up to it, man? You're looking a little tired after what just happened. Yeah, I'm pretty weak, but I don't think the rest of y'all can pull this off, so unless y'all want to try it, and I can just tell you what to do. Let me ask you a cooking question. It's a little mechanical. Yeah. If you cook this, what kind of skill do you think is going to be applied to make sure that this is the best pot of stew that you could possibly make?

I'm hoping it'll be a cooking tools check. Okay. Which I'm proficient, so I get to add my proficiency to it. Depending on what skill she chooses to use, if it's dex or if she decides to slide her hand, I could... I'd be quite good at that. But the unfortunate reality that I'm now just realizing is given my first level of exhaustion, I roll everything at disadvantage, so... I have the ability to give you proficiency in a skill, but I don't think I can give you advantage.

Could you give me proficiency in, uh, wait, any skill? Yeah, name it. Uh, I mean, maybe, I don't know, what do you think? Fucking. Tonight I celebrate my love for you. I don't know. I still feel like singing. You don't have to do that.

I mean, maybe acrobatics. It depends what the god of the universe is going to make a call on. Acrobatics to make a stew? That's outrageous. I mean, what do you think? Could you just, like, get rid of this, you know, exhaustion thing? No. Let me see. I have all kinds of tools. I don't know. Can you help me, like, center my soul and, like, meditate and shit and just be good? No, I can give you a D4 and a saving throw. I can give you borrowed knowledge. That's...

All right, hold on, let me look at the list of skills. We did level up. You're level four. Or five. Or five. I didn't level up. No, we're level five, yeah. Oh, shit. Oh yeah, because you got to four when you got to Hitler. We're at four. No, you're five. We're five? We're five! Oh, shit! Nobody else fucking level up? I leveled up. All right, Carnivore crew, let's take a second to level up. Oh, my program gets an extra attack. Oh, nice. Oh, so did I.

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You are all huddling together, discussing your deal with the Pixies. Oh, that's right. This deal that is significantly more clear and has less risk, you are taking the time to discuss as deeply and thoroughly as possible. Unlike all the other deals that you've made, which have resulted in Gideon losing a significant amount of special and precious things. We need to harvest the Beasleberries. Yes. I have to see if...

Torbek has to see if he can get any Torbek juice. You're sounding very "Who-Man" right now. I know, because I'm not into it yet. And then you were checking to see if you could ease his tiredness and/or give him some sort of advantage so that he's at least rolling straight up. Oh, we're all leveling up. Did you guys do that? I already did it. It took me two seconds. I should attack. I shouldn't trust anybody. I have no way of giving you advantage. If you're tired, then I can try to aid you and perhaps I can level you out, but I can't extinguish your exhaustion.

I think I'll be okay. Do you want proficiency in performance? I think I'm supposed to be proficient. I think just something got fucked up. But just, you know what, for this episode, yeah, just go ahead. Oh my god.

I'm going to start spinning my cane around and, I don't know, tap dancing. I can also provide a little bit of guidance, but I got to harvest the Beesleberry this video. Oh, Grammy! Torbek needs a vial or something, and then Torbek's going to go behind that bush, and nobody's going to look, and Torbek's going to try to squeeze.

- Please, some Dormek juice out. Don't let Dormek get shy. - Dormek, the squeezaling of Beezling is not an easy task. I'm sure you're up for it. - No, but we have to make this work. - I have faith in you, but if this is the last time we speak, just know that you still smell a little like this this whole time. It doesn't matter what's happening. It's just always present.

What do you want Tormek to do about it? It's just clean. There's a stream right here. There's all kinds of hygienic products. You mean take a shower? Like, let a house pee on Tormek? Tormek doesn't think so.

I never really thought about it that way. Exactly right. Exactly right. Frosty, he's about to do something he's not sure if he can do. Why are you going to say that stuff? Oh, I was joking. I was joking, Dormic. That was all a lie. Oh, good joke, Frosty. Oh.

Give Torbek the bile! Would a shmason jar work? Yes! Torbek smacks the jar, not angrily, but as frustrated as you've maybe seen Torbek. Then he'll slink off into the bushes. It's really creepy.

His one leg extends, and then an instant, he rushes like a shadow into the bush, right? You dart into the bush, and at this moment, it gives, it gives, I can't remember, Spider Lily, a moment to jump in. So does that mean we're gonna go ahead and make this deal? We're all in. Okay, great. She reaches out her hand to shake it. As it is said, so we agree. All right. And so it will be.

So will be. She shakes your hand. Why don't you introduce me to your friends? Oh yeah, we talked to them already. We talked to them already? Yeah. They've been standing nearby. We were all talking to you when you showed up. Cow's lip, Mabel. I guess. They nod to you.

Who's going to harvest the Beasleberries? "Oh, that's okay. "I can send Maypole to get a couple. "How many you need?" Oh. Oh. Didn't Torbjörn just slip away to do just that? No, I think he'll go. No, he's getting Witchlock. You've been confused, but no one wanted to correct you. Yeah. I hold up like a dead mouse. What?

He's milking himself for witch lot. It's just that simple. We need to milk the Beazels. The bushes like this thing a little bit. I thought we were going to have to go on a little sod quest to wrangle some Beazels, but it's quite-- No, no, that's okay. They're not that far away. We got wings and we've gotten Beazels many times, so we can grab a couple, how many you need. All right, I got to do this exactly the same as last time. So what are we working with? You got the carlfish? Well, you're going to have to get them out of the river. Oh, we got to fish it.

How many Beezleberries do you need? We need a lot. Okay, how many? There was a lot of Beezle in that. I mean, at least, I don't know, at least a couple handfuls. She looks down at her hands. Yeshua?

No, a couple of handfuls. Couple of these handfuls. That's a lot of Beezle's. Yeah, you're gonna need probably a large bag. It's at least a Beezle's dozen. Maple, Cowslip, you both gonna need to be on Beezle duty. Grab your satchels and go get some. And if it's not enough, I can help with that with my spiritual magic. Namaste.

They fly up into the air and dart off into the underbrush. Oh my god. Roll a constitution saving throw. All right, so Torbek will be in the bush. Any opportunity to find a chair.

The bush is going and you guys hear gunting and it's definitely-- it sounds like it's getting sweaty in the bush. I can understand you, Torbek. Torbek will basically try to think about the last time he did this and attempt to use his alchemic flesh to make one of his fingers turn more needle-knife-like and attempt to push and drip out some of the witchlight. Constitution saving throw, you say? Mm-hmm.

When you're done doing what you're doing, don't forget the witch lie. Natty fucking 20. Let's go! Perfect. I need you to make a wisdom saving throw for me. Wisdom saving throw you say? It's going to be another 20, I feel it. Do you? Yeah. No, but it's 19. Fucking close. For a total of 24. So close.

You focus and concentrate. The bush is shaking. Anyone on the outside truly does believe that you are milking the witch light out of your body. Poochie? You must, you must, Poochie. Through your furry mushroom. As you hold a vial and you attempt to siphon the witch light out of your body, you imagine the--

you imagine the mechanism releasing the witch light and allowing it to travel through whatever contraption is embedded in your arm that leads toward these particular fingers, these needle-like fingers, and you will it to be. All the while, you hear the whistling of another voice inside of your head, waiting, just on the edges, ready to emerge. And as you concentrate, it becomes harder and harder and harder to push this whistling back.

You hear a soft chuckle, but you are able to resist as you're able to get five drops of witch light out of your finger. As this is happening, there would be a lot of-- anybody within earshot would hear a lot of self-encouragement coming from the bush. Come on, Tormeng, you can do this! My, Tormeng, what is this? Your friends are counting on you!

And all five drops, which I guess is the most I've ever gotten. That's almost one, I think. You've got this, Dormag. There's a lot of screaming. Dormag! Try doing a countdown. That always works for me. Three!

Don't hurt yourself. Two, one, one, one. And then when it's all done, Torbeck will stumble out of the bush, sweating. He'll drool right now. The best part about this scene is that Torbeck felt that he was completely covered by the bush, but Torbeck is almost eight feet tall.

And it was really only waist down that this bush covered. So you watched as Torvac, hands inside the bush. The bush was really more of a shrub. Torvac will stumble a little. Mr. Crammy, here. Don't drop it. Don't use it all. Save it. Ugh.

Torbjörn is spaaaaaannn! Torbjörn, you need some bananas? Put the potassium! Torbjörn, take a cigarette! Get your Electromalites back! I think I've got some vitamin A over here.

And a cigar. Thanks, Gideon. Oh, come on, man. That's a waste of a punch. I ain't going to smoke it. He eats the cigar. I give you ten bananas. Oh.

Oh, thank you. They're unending and that's still a waste. Nah. And then Torbek will just slump on the ground and sit. It's about this time that Maypole and-- What?

He's going to say something inappropriate. I'm sure. What, Mikey? It's about this time that the other pixies return. Maypole and Havsnip. And they have, each of them has a shoulder, or a satchel that is filled with what is very clearly weasel berries. Your wings are supple and snappable.

Shut up! Snapple. Shut up, I'll squash you! We wish this. I dare you to run, you know what happens when you do! We will be returned to the elders. All right, uh-- You will join us.

Gricko, why don't you subdue them? One of the pixies reaches down and smashes one of the beasel berries in her hand. Subdue the pixies? I told you to shut up! No, no. Put the berries out of the misery. All right, beasels, here you come with your weird, eldritch chanting. Just take one.

I don't like the way they talk to me, man. It feels weird to do this. I don't say milk my flesh, you know? Must be done. Please, the whisper beyond the stars. Oh, he's gonna make those Pikmin-style ghosts that like-- No!

Cheers, cheers! Oh, so many! Thank you, that's a good job. Thank you, sir. Close the toilet seat before you flush. All right, just do it quietly. All right, sorry, sorry. Okay, Rico, you got to find me some call fish. At least three of them.

What is it that you're looking for now? Coral fish. You said that we gotta go fetch them from the river. Oh yeah, they're just right in the river behind ya. All right, Gricko Frost. That's how you can help. Do you know how to catch a coral fish? I don't, but I'm sure they can figure it out. They're small fellas. Sure. Unless there's some sort of trick that they should know about. What do you think? Is there a trick?

Well, I mean, you have to give in to the Carlfish's nature. You can either tell it it's, you know, hey, I'm looking for a Carlfish, you sexy beast. And then a lot of times they'll climb out of the water and flex in the sun. Or you can, you know, because they're dumb. They're just your average himbo. And so you could also say, like, hey, Carl,

you stupid dumb idiot, I bet you can't do this, you little bitch. And then you know it'll just do whatever you tell it it can't do. I mean, it's a level of lack of intelligence that you can't see in anything above a carlfish. I just need 10 minutes and I will be able to speak in commune with them very well. All right, I got to focus, so you guys do that. That might not work for you, the carlfish aren't very smart.

Well, I can cast Speak With Ammonance. Carlfish is an aminal. Yeah, but Carlfish speak Common and Sylvan and Fish, so you can talk to it regardless of the spell. Just keep him alive. Remember, I need him alive. I'll walk into the lake. It's about how you get them out of the water. If there's anyone who needs superior gains, I have

Fucking murder, death punch, whey powder, very berry flavored. Roll a persuasion at advantage. How long's he had that? We've been out here starving! I look at Gideon.

Dang, got my hopes up. I mean, it's just a clever route. Oh, man. Uh, persuasion? Ah, yes. With D&D Beyond, it can crash and give you an error. But, yeah, if you like Uru Berwi forever, I could learn how to make that. I mean... Well,

Well, I mean, you know, it's one of the better flavors that the Oo-Woo brand offers, but, you know, I mean, I'm just saying, with something like that, with the explosion version, I mean, we could move mountains, man! 19. Just don't use diesel. You say this down into the water, and the water that's running is a beautiful, crystalline turquoise, and you're staring into it. You see no fish in this water.

It is completely clear all the way down to the bottom. And then you see as the rocks at the bottom move, and out from under them, five large coral fish lift and hurl this rock up out of the water as they jump out onto the banks. They're flexing their weird arms that fish shouldn't have, but these coral fish do, and they're ripped.

They have abs of scales and it's incredible as they look towards you excited. Hey, bro, you said you had weighed protein powder for us? Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm Carl, this is Carl, that's Carl. Murder fucking murder punch fist. What do we have to do to get some of those gains from that? Ooh, very berry cotton candy flavor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but is there any sugar in that? Because I'm on a low carb diet.

It's artificial. It's what they put in the impossible. Is that going to give me the shits? It's processed like, yes! Okay, cool. Because I need to lose a couple of pounds to get my weight class for this wrestling match tomorrow, so.

I'm all cool with that. I'm bloating. I've probably got like two or three pounds of water weight. And there's gear to set up your camera while you lift just in that pot over there. No way, brah. Yeah, it's all in one place. Wait, so we just got to jump into that pot and we can have some gear to set up our cameras and we'll have some of that whey protein powder that's going to make us lose a couple of pounds? Some fine honeys mire in your gain and your pump.

are just there, too. They're waiting in the pot. I mean, the pot. Are you trying to tell me that there are some Carlotta fish over there? Yes! Carlotta fish. No way. They are wearing leopard print jeggings. You had me at leopard, and one of the Carl starts to flex. Come on, guys. And they immediately launch themselves over.

Balloonie juice fish! Real Carlfish would know that the Carlotta fish don't care about the gains at all, it's just other Carlfish. That's true. Dude, they look huge, man. You lifting? As they get to the pot, that is what you hear. They're like, "God, you're sweating up a storm, man. "Your abs are so glistening right now. "Your scales look so good."

You got a bicep pump going there. Save some gains for the rest of us. That's right, bro. I'll flip you in, because I'm really strong today. And they start flipping each other into the pot. Oh, you want to swap me, bro? Okay. I need some swats, man. And it is with that that you watch as the coral fish flip themselves into the pot, one right after the other. Hey, what's going on? There's no way. You hear nothing as you put the cap on. So there's a pot.

Does it have water in it? We put it on. I'm using my mind to hold Portal for real this time.

When you need the lid to come off, I can abide. All right, so they're trapped in there? Yes, unless they beat my amazing mind capabilities in a strength contest. Oh, is this a new pot or is it with all of the Loneling Juice? There's no fuckers. No, it's the pixies pot. Oh, thank god. You saw them struggling with human-sized cooking, accessories or utensils. All right, okay, let me just do some prep here.

I can't even believe you got five whole Carlfish in there. I mean, they're normally in pairs, because they got to pump each other up. They're very vain, they don't like to be alone. But five of them? I can't even believe it. That's an entire-- Well, you know what a school of Carlfish is called, a gym. That's an entire gym of Carlfish. Gym of Carlfish. Well, I'm very good at what I do. I have a connection to the natural world, especially when they're freakish and monstrous.

All right, Torbjorn, this is a lot more than last time. Oh yeah, Torbjorn can do good, man. You're getting better at this. I'm going to need five Mason jars. Don't use it all. I'm going to separate it into five Mason jars and sort of water each one down with the green alcohol like last time, exactly how I did it last time. And I'll store the others in my apron pouch so that it's nice and safe.

Um, alright, uh, you just keep a close eye on this so they don't, you know, take a nip of hooch while I'm not looking. Yeah, I got it, I got it. Alright, let me do my thing. And I want to start pulling out all of the ingredients. I'm gonna start making a, I guess,

I'm gonna use my own pot for the stew, 'cause they're in there. So I'm gonna use my own pot and I'm gonna chop the vegetables and start making the roux and just sort of do my thing and attempt to start making the crawfish stew. Yeah, it takes about an hour, but you are, you're a chef, you're a cook, this is what you do, you don't have the time constraints

You don't have the time constraints of an Electrum Chef competition. When it comes to cooking, these kinds of recipes don't leave your mind. Once you've made it, you're good to go. You don't need to roll to succeed on this. It comes naturally to you. You do need the time. It takes you about an hour and the pixies all the while are chatting with you.

and it is during this hour that it's cooking, and you're right there in the middle of all this, so you can be part of the conversation, that they decide to impart some knowledge on you.

So, we gotta do our part of the deal, yeah? And you're making the carlfish stew. It smells amazing. I can't believe that those carls are still in there talking about their gains. Nobody cooks better than Crammy. It sure seems like it. It looks like we made a great deal. Oh, by the way, we gotta give you your...

You're fire, baby. Oh, yeah. Cow slip. What can you do about this? Can you reignite this flame for me? Oh, you know I can. Oh, God, you're so handsome. Oh, well. It's going to take a little kiss.

Looks like I'm about to slip her the cow, if you know what I mean. I've heard that, and I am not at all bothered by it. Oh, I shouldn't have put the hand up. Not the hog this time? Well, it seemed more applicable to the scenario. She's clearly sweating. I don't know if it's getting hot in here, or if you're getting hot in here, or if it's getting hot in here, but as long as you're all right with it, I just got to give you a quick smooch on your lips.

and you'll have your fire back. Changes name to Rizzian. I think we're getting hot in here. Come on, cowslip. Oh god! She looks like she's about to faint as you put your hand behind her and keep her from falling over. You slowly lift her up and you kiss her gently on her lips. You immediately feel-- Wow, he's really getting into it.

Holy shit, I'm blushing. You imagine that she was just going to give you a little bit of fire, but your passion and your dedication to the bit

allowed her to provide just a little bit of life. Kermia's pissed. I don't think Kermia comes home today. ♪ Save the lap pants for me, please ♪

Slappin' some even over a hot stove all day. You get in the middle, no appreciation. No appreciation. I dress him in the morning every time. Some hussy. Some summer-looking hussy. Give me a cold, I'm gonna whip your ass. The girls of summer. You know what I mean. Three pixies show up. Oh, fuck. That's my magic number.

All that happens while you are engaged in this kiss with a pixie, you feel the heat of her lips as it travels throughout your body. And where there had been embers in your beard and in your hair, it turns to flames as you roar with fire. And as the kiss breaks, the flames slowly begin to fade and you feel yourself

burning brighter, even brighter than when you met the purple bird that tried to take your spark. Even better. Your skin is that same burnt red that it was before, and the embers are-- they crackle.

at the base of your chin, and you feel invigorated. I'm back! I feel like Hades from Hercules, man, when he gets all upset at the demon guys. What? I don't know, this is just the closest thing I can think of. You mean the guy voiced by Bobcat Goldwake? Like that guy? What the fuck was that guy? Fucking him?

Are you talking about Pain and Panic? I just think his Hades was James Woods. Who was the other one? We are worse! Pain was voiced by Bobcat Goldberg. You know that, Torbjorn? Goldberg. Torbjorn gets deflated and sweaty on the ground. "For the bomb, DB!" Gideon's never looked better and Torbjorn's never looked worse.

That was pretty good, huh, Gideon? Oh yeah, man. It really put the fire back in. Got me back in action. Yeah, you look fine. You look fine.

A little less distinguished, but, you know. What do you mean less distinguished? I mean, I'm sizzling. It's a little top, but, you know, that's what you're into. I'm good. Yeah. Oh, it's what I'm into, for sure. Oh, touch it, man. No. Oh, don't burn yourself. No, no, no. I'm not going to touch it. No. What do you mean? No, I'm not going to touch it. Okay. I'm good.

Just hang out for a minute Sorry I mean, oh you're having such a bad day. I'm ready for the call I just fucking get them just dump them right in there in the pot man This is my own pie that they're in that other pot

over there

Don't be jealous, man. It was narrative relevant, I think, okay? I don't even remember why I started it. Do you refer to your asshole as a prison pot? I thought we were talking about your asshole, man. The normal pot, I'm holding it with my mind. This is where the carlfish are. Oh, yeah. Well, everybody knows when you're imprisoned by hobgoblins, you refer to your asshole as a prison pot.

I didn't know that. See, if you gotta hide things away, you just get tucked away in your little hiding place. What kinds of things? Well, you know, like screwdrivers. Piping, piping. Turbex spades are shut immediately. Oh, come on!

Fish blades! Like gauges, heat mechanics, you know, like anything. You got a whole Home Depot down there? I always get lost in these things. Where's the gardening section? Holy shit. You need a pilgrim? *makes weird noises*

Oh, they have Weed Whackers! I have no good-- She needs those. Someone in chat said a prison pot of holding. "Yes, sir."

All right, give me these crawfish, man. Let them go, let them go. You ready? No. Well, I mean, yeah. Okay. All right, I got the pot. I've released them. Now you can just very quickly dump them into the pot. Oh, there they go. Yeah, I got them. Just dump them in, dump them in. Go, go, go. Oh, I'm sorry. What are they doing? Might using shake weights? This was a bad plan. They're shake weighting. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, leave her.

We cut to the bottom of the river, the cove that they came out of. The sixth Carl Fish is down there. He wakes up. "Bros?" "Oh no, bro!" "Bros? Where'd you go, bros?" "Who's gonna spot me now?" "Rest now, rest now." And as soon as I feel it still, I pull the lid off. Okay. Still flexing it. All right, well, I guess that's how it was.

Now for the secret ingredient, I'll take a little bit off of one of the Shmason jars and I'll just put in two drops, I believe, of Witch's Brew. You know who else makes a good gumbo. We're out of control.

Shut up, dude! Come here, I'm gonna stab him. Oh no, bro! Oh, this is gonna be a gumbo. You dumb idiot. No way. Got some chips, got some dick.

And then I will stir it and I will let it simmer for another, I don't know, 15 minutes. You let it simmer for another 15 to 20 minutes and it is during this time that the other pixies, that the pixies get together and they have these small little stumps that they're sitting upon and they prepare to give you the information that you need. I got to apologize for all of it.

We are normally not like this. Roll a deception check. What the fuck are you talking about? Deception? Am I disadvantaged? Yeah. Oh god, description, eh? 15 actually. At disadvantage? Yeah, it was a 13 and 17, and I have plus two. Oh, you're full of shit. You're like this all the time.

This definitely comes naturally to you guys. You're very insightful, Spider Lily. I try to be. All right, well, you need some information. Because if you're like this all the time, you're not going to survive in Thither if you don't get some help. I'm surprised we're not all dead already. Do you even want to stay in the Feywild anymore? Why don't you just get out? We're in severe debt. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, well, that's okay. Well, that's...

information. I'm just going to go ahead and relay all the information to you because, well, the girls are-- Is it a lot of information? No, it's just two bits of information. That's all we made a deal for. But the other girls are kind of out of commission as they're looking up at Gideon right now. And you see that the two other pixies are staring up at Gideon. So yeah, uh, you're in severe debt. Well, you might want to go see Ned. Ned? Yeah.

Can he clear our debts so we can go home? Kind of sounds like he works in finance. Ned? You keep saying the word Ned, and then you hear Maypole turn around. What are you talking about? His name's not Ned, it's Nib. Nib? Are you sure it's Nib? Are you sure it's not Niv? No, I'm pretty sure it's Nib. I don't know, that's a stupid name. Who's ever named Nib? That guy's named Nib. And they argue for a little bit, and she goes,

What kind of miser is he?

Oh, he's an old miser that toils inside of a cave. Oh, but the reason you want to see him is what?

Oh no, no, no, no, we're not going to go there. Is he like a lukewarm miser, maybe? No, he's a gold miser. So the thing is, he made a deal with Granny Nightshade. Do you want to hear about this or not? I was just going to ask if he was a lukewarm miser. So who's Granny Nightshade? Is it another hag we have to worry about? Are you just ignoring me? It's just what we call--

scabbath the night scabbath yes anyway granny nightshade made a deal with him because he showed up here from the material plane out of one of those uh fairy circles you see and he has been doing some business in a town called agwe apparently through nefarious deeds with some person named remi guru he had um he had ruined the lives of tons and tons of people he was

He was running some kind of scheme with housing. A lot of women and children and downtrodden lost their lives and their homes because of him. And this Remiguru person threatened him for all of the money that he'd made, so he ran off to the Feywild. And then once he got here, he drank from one of the pools and became overcome with emotions. And the emotion he was overcome with was guilt.

guilt for what he'd done to those people. So he made a deal with her to try and make amends for what he'd done to them. So now he lives in a cage, or a cage, a cave, right? It's a cave, right? Is it Net-A-Nib? Anyway, he lives in a cave and all

All of his gold that he made from this bad dealing with this Remiguru guy, he has to spin into magical items worth even more. And he has to keep doing that until all of the money's gone. So his cave is just filled with gold and magical items worth countless amounts of... Well, whatever else it is that you material plane walkers...

Utilize. It's wild. That is a fascinating story. Do you know if he has any weaknesses or fears? Oh yeah, I do, because the thing is, part of the deal he made with Granny Nightshade is he can't leave that cave until he's spun all of the gold into magical items that he's given to other people. He can't have a single cent of his money's back, you know?

And he's now haunted by the shades of the people whose lives he destroyed. If he looks at them. So he wears a blindfold so he can't see.

these shades as they try and torment them, because they just live behind him all the time. So he can't see anything at all. So he'll never see us coming! No, but he can hear you. He wouldn't be able to see what you're doing, though, because he's horrified of those shades. But if there was some sort of loud cacophony, he wouldn't be able to hear underneath the sound of the drone that might be-- Oh no, probably not, no. Oh! Wait, how did people lose their lives to a housing scheme?

This man sounds like he's in a lot of pain.

that he probably doesn't need to live with anymore. He could be parted from it. Someone should assist him with his grief. Have I heard of Ned? No. I've never heard of this fucking guy.

Yeah, you think he's running a con in Agwe and we didn't know about him? How the hell did that happen? Was he not your coworker or something? I thought the housing crisis in Agwe was... had something to do with the Central Bank of Agwe or the Federal Reserve or something. I don't... I mean, I don't remember anything about the Nib guy. I mean, that would stand to reason. What if there's some weird time stuff going on? It either happened a long time ago or hasn't happened yet.

How long ago was the housing crisis? Was that a long time ago? I mean, that's a good point. I don't know how old Guru is. He's just a human. How old could he be? I don't know. I always assumed he was in his, I don't know, 50s? But, I mean, maybe he's found some way to... may have struck some deal with the Good Baron to extend that. But yeah, so that's the additional information I can give you about...

could help you out a little bit. And then the other thing that I'm contractually obligated to talk to you about are the fairy circles. Now, as I've said, there are fairy circles all over Thither, and they were here long before Granny Nightshade took over. And before she took over, they were around to teleport their Fey Crossings back to the material plane of Avantris.

And each fairy circle goes to a different place. There's a way to activate them to use them, which is really, really cool. And I'll tell you exactly how to do it. But the thing is, some of the fairy circles have been corrupted by Granny Nightshade. And they no longer... I mean, they can still function. But they're twisted by her nature. So, we won't talk about those because that wasn't part of the deal. However...

We will talk about the ones that are uncorrupted. Now you have to remember both fairy circles look exactly the same. Visually there's no way to tell which one's which. Not until you stand inside of it, so you better hope you're lucky. Anyway, the uncorrupted ones are really, really, really interesting. So, what's going to happen with the uncorrupted ones? You will find that they are homes to campestries.

Kind of like the creatures that you became. That's why when you step through the fairy circle on your way into the place, you turn into a campestry. It's kind of cult magic, because it doesn't always work the way it's supposed to. If you step into Thither through a fey crossing like that one right on the border, then be a little warped. If you walk into one intentionally, you don't have to worry about losing your bodies. You will have to deal with the campestry, though. They are lovers of song.

They don't really communicate outside of anything but song, and they can be bartered with through musical means, which can help you a lot. However, that's not necessarily what you're looking for, though the campestries can be very kind, so you should be nice to them. What you're wanting is how to activate the Fey Crossing, and this is where it gets difficult. You walk inside of it. Okay. And then...

holding a wand or a stick of wood above your head. Okay. You're going to run in a circle counterclockwise. Oh, shitter winds! While saying, three turns with a shins and off we go. Okay! Now, if done properly, and there's another thing to it as well, what was it? Something about your blood. Anyway, I'm sure that's not important.

If it's done correctly, it will teleport you to the material plane that is connected to that particular fairy circle. That's all you gotta do. The great part is, there will be a matching fairy circle on the other side that works exactly the same way, for the most part. Are you sure you can't remember the blood thing? That's something to do with the type of blood you have in your body. Is that enough to satisfy the contract, the deal you've made? Oh, yeah.

If you say so. So you're saying that these fairy circles, they sort of act like the color-coded cauldrons from Banjo-Tooie? I don't know what that means. That's actually exactly how they work, right? Back me up on this, Greg. Yeah, yeah. So how do we know what a fairy circle is? What does it look like? Oh, so you're walking through the forest. You come to what appears to be a clearing at first, but really, it's a ring of mushrooms, toadstools, really.

that encircle a plot of ground that's brimming with vegetation, not like trees, tall. It's like you can walk in it. It's just moss and other mushrooms and things. It's almost as if someone took a lawn mower, I'm sure you know what those are, we have them all over the Feywild, and they mowed the grass right in that spot and then put up mushrooms around it, is what it looks like. Are you thinking of a lawn miser, perhaps? Oh no.

Didn't we walk through something like that before we got to the carnival? A lawnmower? Oh man, not a lawnmizer. I'm saying like a mushroom circle and then those things threw those colored orbs at us. We had to get covered in glitter. Remember that? What? Before the carnival. We're in a big circle.

We're getting taunted. Oh yes. Grammy just, you know, handled Le Pew. Uh huh. And then, you know, we're in that giant circle. We're making our way to the carnival. I vaguely recall that happening, yes. It was like a year ago. It feels like a year ago. Maybe that was a fairy circle. And I think that fulfills the deal.

Well, we still need to have our own to provide a very award-winning, critically acclaimed Carlfish stew. And it's done! Oh! Pass it out to everybody. You ladle out the Carlfish stew and you feast.

and it does seem to fill the path. Yeah, you really brought up the himbo. Okay, Hootsie, remember like we did last time. Let's make a wish. And she'll grab onto one arm and I'll grab onto another. It will snap. Oh, you get to wish again. I'm still lucidly aware. Oh no. I want to suck on the head. I knew that was coming.

What do you think? Oh, it's delicious, we love it. Well, thank you. I love the little coral fish eyes. I put them in my mouth and I just suck on them until they pop. Don't forget to take off the neon shorts. All right, well, it's been a pleasure. I guess, where do we go next? Should we camp?

It feels like it's getting late, right? Oh, I'm pretty exhausted, actually. Looking above, it does look like it's now reaching twilight. The sun is dipping below the horizon, and night will fall eventually. Is it all right if we just set up camp here? You're certainly welcome to join us. Sure, this is where we're going to stay tonight, so as long as you don't mind the company. We can tell stories and exchange, perhaps, games or riddles. Oh, I would love that. That would be a lot of fun. Oh, a little bit of Beezlebag. Oh.

"Yes, exactly right." Yeah, I know. Those are the old ones. Those old ones, they come and go, I'll tell you. "They do. Delicious." Crummy, this is even better than the last one you made. "I agree, he's perfected this somehow." Some of your best work, man. "Well, you know, practice makes perfect."

You know, there's eight of us. We could play a pretty solid game of poker. What do you think, fellas? Are we gonna play strip poker? Uh, well, no. Well, I guess y'all don't have money. Oh, poker! I'm very good at poker. I learned from that very friendly frogman atop of the hungry catfish. And he said I was doing really well, because I won one hand. How'd you do overall?

If I recall correctly, you lost all your gold pieces. Just like I did. Oh, and then I asked you for more, and you gave it to me. And I did, yeah, because I had that funny drink. Yeah. And then, no, I guess I ended-- well, you know what they say, that's what the Bullywoks said, they said, "Oh, it's okay, the house always ends." Yeah. Well, in this game, there'll be no house.

Just us and the cold logic of the randomly shoveled cards in front of us. But if we're not playing for money, I mean, what's the point? I'm sure we could think of something to play for. Perhaps more advice? They seem to be interested in exchanging clothing items for some reason. What do you think? Do you care about gold pieces? Do you have any? No. We could play for trinkets. We have trinkets. I was telling a song about this displacer beast eyeball. That's pretty cool. We could play for teeth.

Our teeth, or just teeth we find in general in the world? It doesn't really matter as long as you got teeth. Norbeck Falls. I don't have any teeth. I'm all in. I don't really have any teeth to give. Why don't we play like 20 questions or something? I'll put the deck of cards back in my jacket. Is it bigger than a...

Breadcrate? Is what bigger than a breadcrate? I thought we were playing 20 questions. I don't know how to fucking play 20 questions. I figured you did. Oh, all right, you go. I go what? You have to ask me a question about the thing that I'm thinking of. Oh, I got it. Is it bigger than a breadcrate? And this is what happens for the next couple of hours as the sun dips down below the horizon and night falls. You set up camp.

You fashion a makeshift tent between the trees to give yourself shelter as rain begins to come in and you cover yourself and the pixies set up little leaf hammocks in the boughs of the trees enjoying the rain, not wanting to get out of it. As you all lay down your bed rolls and

You cover the fire so that it can continue to generate heat as the temperature begins to drop and it begins to get colder in this evening. But the air is fresh and the smell of the rain in the forest is one that you haven't smelled in a long, long time. And there is something about this place that even though it's different than hither had been, there's something almost safe.

about where you're at in this moment, and you breathe a sigh of relief as you all crawl into your bedrolls and cozy yourself up for a long night's sleep. Hopefully a restful night. Gideon, you take Twig's puppet body and you see that she is, has a look of serenity on her face, but she is simply that, a puppet and nothing more.

You tuck her into bed next to you and you all fall into a deep sleep. You all benefit from a long rest. - Oh, awesome. - And as you wake up in the morning to the sounds of bees and birds and fauna, you are immediately met with something startling.

This is not where you had fallen asleep the night before. The rock at the 45 degree angle is no longer there, nor is the Pixie Campsite or the rushing waters of the river that flowed down from whatever mountain the water had led from. You are deep, deep in the midst of the forest in a very, very small little grove,

barely large enough to contain the makeshift camp that you have made. And though your tent is still attached to two trees and set up, these are not the trees that you had seen the day prior. These ones have a dark plum bark to them and their leaves are a beautiful lilac.

and they are clearly not the trees or even the forest you had been in the night before. And that is where we'll end the session. Thanks for running the session, dude. What the hell? Really, I'm very excited for next week. That was a lot of fucking fun.

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