Edge of Midnight | Ep. 28 | A Twist of Fate
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Welcome to Legends of Avantris. I'm Briggsie the Cutlasscratch. You have heard of me, haven't you? And you're listening to Edge of Midnight. Here's what happened last time. Yeah, Kelly, it's Edge.

We will get Adela to her quarters and we will see you at dinner. You're going to need to learn how to speak elegantly. Oh, thank God. I can't wait. I will take you to the small dining room where you are going to learn dinner etiquette. I was trying to roleplay. Stop it. We're not roleplaying. We're trying to get through this. I have to dance with you, you or Jericho. You see six items. It's all real.

It's alright, yeah. I had faith. I had a feeling that he was a man of his word. You know, he's a man who knows how to make a proper deal. But how? We will learn the tale. Providing you with these items in a grand ceremony at the Masquerade will prove to all of them who will be in attendance that you are special. Oh my god, they're here! Ava, thank you so much for bringing them in! *Humming*

Power is a dangerous thing. It seems like something that will solve all your problems and make everything right at the end of a hero's journey. But what lies at the end of the rainbow is rarely gold, and usually it has a terrible cost. You find yourselves inside of the dining room at Chateau Clair de Lune.

It is here that you see Adela and countless what look to be friends of hers as they drink around the table. She is sitting at the very end of the table in a beautiful beaded dress fitting very tightly to her body. Her long beaded necklace with the planchette hanging at the very base of it. She's swinging it around in one hand.

as she kicks both her feet up onto the table and leans back and takes a long drag off of the cigarette pinched between her two fingers. She laughs at somebody's joke. Philip stands behind her, massaging her shoulders, looking off into the distance, almost lost in thought, but still trying to engage with this woman that he loves so much. As you're escorted in via this

puppet-like entity, this Ava, as she has been called, as you've all been welcomed into this place. You see that there are many chairs along the table that are available for you to take a seat as Adela waves you in and motions for you to join them. You see that towards the back of the room there is a band in full swing. Every single one of the musicians appears to be some sort of

ghoul-like creature as one of them plays the trumpet, another blows on the trombone. There is a thin, ghoulish woman towards the very front who sings in a smoky, sultry voice. All

A beautiful background music to the laughter and the drinks and the conversation. There are tons of people here. None of them seem to be paying any attention to you. All their focus seems to be on Adela.

She doesn't stop her conversation as she motions you in, but there are seats very close to her. You imagine that you could move in and sit with her. You could go sit at the tables in front of the band. There are waiters moving about, providing drinks and appetizers. There's food all over the table for you to enjoy. Whatever your heart desires in this moment. Hello. This is... Wow, what a spectacle. Where do we sit?

I think we may sit ourselves. I do not see any name plates or anything along those lines. Or is it some kind of test? The secret final test of Cotillion? All social encounters like this one are tests of a sort. Oh, no. It's all right, Briggs. Just remember what you've learned. Remember your training.

I thought we didn't have to use anything that we learned until tomorrow at the masquerade. It never hurts to keep it all at the forefront of your mind. Oh, gosh. Looking around, you can see that nobody here seems to be utilizing any sort of

manners that you had learned at the masquerade. There are, not only does Adela have her feet up on the table, but you can tell that there are quite a few people here who've already had too much to drink. There's dancing and laughter, and this feels a lot more casual.

Does it look like drinks are being served, or do I have to go to a, perhaps an open bar or something like that? There is a bar along the wall where you could go and get drinks. You also notice that there are quite a few well-dressed servants milling about. These all appear to be Philip's servants. They're all ghoul-like or skeletal in nature, but they're all very well-dressed, very well put together.

And the more that you look at them, the more that you realize that they look less like the reanimated dead and more like there's some semblance of life to them. They're almost more human-like. Can I fetch us all something to drink? I'm thinking something a bit stronger than wine. Ooh, like sor-sperilla? More like some sort of liquor. That would be lovely, thanks. I'll take some, too. All right, I'll be back. Well, if they got any kind of fancy sody pop...

I would prefer there. Right. And I'll walk off to see if I can find the bar there and just order us a round of beverages, what everybody would like, and bring them back. It's...

easy enough for you to do so. Instead of handing the beverages to you, one of the servants grabs a tray and piles all of the beverages on there and leads you back towards the table, motions towards seats that are very close to where Philip and Adela are at the head of the table. And as you take your seats and take your glasses, you begin to take in the fare that's on the table in front of you. You had expected dinner. Dinner is what had been

mentioned to you, but this table is lined with cakes and sweets and candies of all kinds. This is the birthday cake in the very center is multi-tiered almost like a wedding cake but for a birthday girl and it is every single thing about this is pink and covered in frosting.

Here's to a successful passing of Cotillion and all of our manors training. Thank you, very nice. We did it! We did it! Cheers. Cheers. Prissy, I'm very proud of you. You did what your old man said you couldn't do. That's right. I think together we can accomplish anything. Well, at least Cotillion. But I mean, I guess we did do some mighty fine things, uh, in... out in Folsom's.

And I think we may find, we may beat them witches once and for all, once we cut off the head of that there snake. I certainly hope that you're right, Jericho.

I don't mean to interrupt, but I wanted to say happy birthday. Adela, thank you for the invitation. Adela immediately pulls her feet off the table and spins towards you sitting upright. You see as Philip squeezes her shoulders, but he doesn't look down at you. He continues to look off in the distance as she spins towards you. Oh, gosh, Briggsie, thank you so much. It's such an honor for you to be here with me for my birthday.

The honor is ours. It is. Would you mind if I send you the classic birthday song? Oh, I would love it. You want to go ahead

on the stage and sing it for everyone? - Oh, well, I mean, I suppose I haven't had an audience this large in quite some time. Since the Cornelonde Festival, if I recall. - She claps her hands and then magically booms her voice and announces to everyone that everyone address your attention to the stage, a performance by her best friend, Jericho Sticks. - Ooh! Get 'em, Jerry! Is this thing on?

Well, well. Uh, uh, my, uh, my name is, uh, Jericho. Oh, Jericho Sticks, but you can call me Jericho. And, uh... Oh, good job doing it! Anyway, uh, here's the birthday song. It'll start playing my banjo.

Well, there once was this little blue bird what told me it was your birthday. I hope it was a happy birthday that that blue bird did say to me. And then it ate a worm. And it didn't choke on it that time, but maybe it did later. And it was your birthday and you had many wishes. 25 wishes and all. The first wish--

It is the length of Freebird. The live recording session is, it's like the episode of Aqua Teenager. I get up and I get several drinks over the course of this performance. You do. And a few other people, a few other people do the same. Nobody says anything. Everybody listens. And Adela more so than anyone else. As she leans forward with her hand on both of her, um,

or her head on both of her hands. She looks wistfully up at you. She seems very, very happy. And no one claps louder than Adela when you're finished. When there's a lull in the song, I start clapping awkwardly. And then it starts going, oh, oh, oh. Pixie. Oh, oh, oh, oh. I do that multiple times. 25 wishes later. Jericho, don't!

Oh, that was just the berries! Something. Well, uh, thank you, thank you. I'm here all week, I think. I take requests. Jericho. Thank you. Was that an original song, or was that something you learned? Well, I mean, I said it was a classic, but I had never had a birthday before, so I just kind of made up what I thought felt appropriate, what I don't want to hear on a birthday. That's all. So, I mean, I feel like it's very, it feels very traditional to me.

Did you all have a lovely day today? I'm sorry about the bloody tea incident. Oh, no need to apologize. Your health is, I'm sure, still recovering from your experience. I'm feeling a little tired, but it's not so bad. I'll be alright. I'm a strong gal. I can tell. I'm sure you will be fine. But outside of that, did you do anything fun? You want to tell it to me?

about it come on I want to hear well we had a very full day many activities we had our elocution lessons and that was and your past with flying colors across your past is Julian isn't that great oh I love it the whole thing the whole thing oh I'm so proud of you big britsy dining and a rest

That's wonderful. It went better than I would have expected. We'll have to get you some trophies or something made up. Is that a thing? It can be. I can have a cotillion trophy? Sure. Bring it back to me dad and show him? Of course, yeah, I'll have one. We can do that, right, Phil? And he shakes his head for a minute and he's like, anything you want, darling. We can do anything you want. Yes, sir.

Well, that's mighty, mighty generous of you. And gosh, to think it's your birthday and you're offering us gifts, and we forgot to gift you gifts ourselves. Oh, your presence is all I need for a gift. I'm just happy to have you here. That's a very funny double entendre. Why? Well, you said that our presence was all that was necessary. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I see. Does Philip look distracted? Yeah, very.

Adela, if you don't mind, I'm curious if we might have the opportunity to speak to your lovely Phillip at some point this evening. Sure. I mean, I don't see why not. What do you think about that, honey? And you see it takes him a second. He's... I'm sorry. I'm sorry, baby. What did you say? Oh, well, the fellas want to know if they can have a conversation with you at some point today. I'll do the best that I can. I don't got all the time in the world, and there's a lot of stuff going on right now with...

Some of the lords and ladies and the rest are druskinvolved, but for you, if I can find the time, I'll make it. We understand. You're a busy man. Philip, is there anything we can do to help? It's... We got the masquerade coming up tomorrow. It's just... It's a lot going on. But I'm... Once we get through this, everything will be smooth sailing. Good as gravy. We're here if you need us. Tonight is all about my wife. My lovely Adela. It's a special night.

Whatever she wants. He reaches down, or he leans down, he wraps his arms around her and gives her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Oh, you're just the sweetest. I don't know what I would do without Phil. Keeps my head on straight." "I'm awful sorry that he's feeling a little stressed on account of us not killing Mother Midnight and such and..."

I kind of thought that we had her on the ropes when we burned that one there witch in Folsons. That ended up being Keziah Jenkins, who was actually a good witch. So we did burn a witch, but it wasn't the bad witch. We actually were pretty responsible for a lot of innocents dying accidentally. A witch is a witch, really, when you think about it. But you must have done something, because things have been outside of what's going on in the provinces, of course, but all that's been going on for a while.

Outside of that, things have been pretty quiet, so thinking you might have scared them off or something. At least now they know they are four... heroes, I guess? Here to protect Druskinvold? I'm not sure I'd go that far, but if we've managed to buy ourselves some more time, and more importantly all of you, then that is what's important.

Yeah, and is there anything that would make your birthday extra special that we could do? I mean, I feel just horrible that we... I'm so glad you asked that, Buzz. Here has all of my Sivir Taroka reading, just to make up for what happened with the tea leaf reading earlier. Taroka's really more my speciality anyway, so... How does that work?

We probably wouldn't do it here, so we'd want to wait until after dinner. And then we'd all get together. Phil's going to come, of course. And we'll go into the side room. Oh, we could go to the parlor. And then we'll turn off. We'll turn down the lights a little bit. Only light a few of the lanterns. Maybe a couple of candles just to set them. And then we'll get around the circular table. And each of you will go in turn. I'll have you shuffle the decks. We'll pull cards. And we'll find out what's going on with your future. It'll be so fun.

It'll be intimate, it'll just be the few of us. I would like that very much. So would I. I haven't read Taroka for in a while. Not since you're, well, not in a setting like this since y'all came to Dreskenwald. That was the last time I read you Taroka, wasn't it, Phil? He looks down at her and he smiles and he nods, but doesn't say anything. I'm certainly interested in learning a bit more about what might be in store for us.

It could be an interesting exercise. Well, if anything knows, it's gonna be the cards. How, uh... How accurate are your readings? Oh, they're very accurate. And when you last read the cards, what did they tell you? Oh, I can't tell you that. That spills privacy.

You didn't read anything about us or the future of Druskenwald? It was just Philip's reading? Well, in my reading, it said that someone special was going to be coming to this place. And, well, sure enough, I didn't just get someone special. I got someone special, because look at all you're here.

That's very kind of you to say. But here's the thing. The cards feed off the energy of the person I'm doing the reading for, and you weren't here at the time. So I couldn't look into your future, not until now at least. And you're sure that they were referring to us? Who else could they be referring to? You know, I knew a guy that used to do readings like this. Usually the readings are worded in a general way where they apply to most people in a very sort of, uh...

Spooky in every way, but really it's just a bit of a subterfuge. Oh, that's not true at all. Oh, I'm not saying that you're reading with me, but

But that's what I'm just saying is if you're reading... If you happen to be general and maybe, you know, you read into it too much. That hurts my feelings, Briggsie, on my birthday too. No, I'm not saying you read into it. Briggsie, I'm just saying as everybody would do it. You know what, never mind. I don't want to do Taroka anymore. My point was he was a con man and just the art of divination is a sacred... I've been working really hard to get better at Taroka and now you're sitting here telling me it's all a bunch of codswallow.

I'm not saying your cob is... No cobs are being swallowed, Miss Adelph. Not at all. No swallowed cobs here. He's just... He's feeling mightily mixed on account of his issues with his father and the resentment and the approval he received. Whoa, hey! Hey! Who told you about that? You did! They're in great detail! Oh!

Oh, I guess you're wrong. Adela, please, understand that Briggsie doesn't mean anything by it. We are genuinely interested in hearing what you have to say, and especially what the cards have to say. If you don't believe in it, it's not gonna work anyway. I can promise you, we all have experiences that would lead us to believe this.

I am very eager. Don't beat yourself up about it, Briggsie. People say things they don't mean all the time. Why don't you just pass me that sweet little cake right in front of you, and that'll make up for it. No, that's a toy. No, that's also a plush toy. That's another one of the plush toys. Nope, that's another plush toy. It's right next to the clown, but between the cat.

Nope, not that one. Why do you have so many plushies next to the cakes? Because it's my birthday. You can't have a birthday without toys and presents. This one? Looks like a goblin. You know what? Fine. I'll take the goblin. Okay, yeah. It's a goblin cake. Oh!

Not a cake, it's a toy. But she just holds on to it. And eventually you see one of the ghouls move over and take the cake she had been directing you to and bring it back towards her. And she begins to eat it. It's just that in Cotillion, they said that it's social engagements to contribute to the conversation, tell a relatable story from your life that sort of relates to the conversation.

So, anyway, I'm sorry that I... Are we still on this? Can we just drop it? Stupid music! Oh, God! Adela, I'm very eager to contribute my all to the reading. I am curious what it has to say about my destiny and the future. Oh, I can't wait. I'm sure they're all going to be incredibly positive. We have... Me too!

Yeah, Garsh. We've been waiting for a little bit of good news, especially after those terrible nightmares we had last night. Even if they are not, we will at least know that the storm is coming instead of going in blind. That's a fair point. It's always good to know what's coming so you can prepare for it. We can't do the Chiroga card readings anyway until after we have dinner, so eat up! All right. That sounds like a plan.

Well, yeah, we'll eat, uh, when is supper being served? I see a bunch of cake. I want to see it fill up. Well, it is. What? A pretzel. Is there a pretzel? Oh. You know, how do they tie it in this? Well, it's still, uh, soft when they, uh, uh, Oh, it should still be soft now. They spin it up and then they, and then they twist it. And we four whistle and we put powdered sugar on it instead. Oh, like one of them cinnamon sugar pretzels. Mm-hmm.

I just don't know how they do it. I feel like it's witchcraft and wizardry that makes these pretzel shapes. You ever tied a knot before, Jerry? Well, I've gotten tongue twisted. Is that a knot? No. It's, look, if you take a look, it's like they start a knot and they just stop halfway through. And that's it. And then they make it.

Well, gosh, that sounds awfully complicated. I think you should learn. I think you would make a fantastic baker. You're very creative. Usually the process that I'm most connected to is just kind of standing out in an old wheat field before it even gets reaped and milled and turned into bread like that little red hen once did.

You're familiar with the Little Red Hen, aren't you, Miss Leathercutt? I have heard a similar tale, though it did not follow the exact events of what you are describing. Well, I can sing you the song of the Little Red Hen if you're feeling the tune. Oh, there's a whole song about it? There's a whole song? There's a stage right there and some sort of magic mouth device. Oh, would y'all like to hear the song of the Little Red Hen? Yeah, we would, absolutely. Yeah, please. Go ahead. Right up on this stage.

Okay, I learned this one from a certain kind of fella who had a bit of an eye-vent, a guard sort of way about the song. It's an interesting tale of another tune. Okay, here we go. Is this on? Hello? Hello? Okay, it's me again. This is old Jericho Sticks. You can call me Jericho, most folk do.

Garsh, I fucking hate you useless fucking freeloaders. You don't get any fucking bread unless you fucking help. And about halfway through Jericho's song, the door to the room bursts open and you see immediately the room goes completely silent except for Jericho who continues to sing this song as a...

As a ghoul-like creature, much taller than the other servants that are milling about, but still of a similar kind, looking almost soldier-like, rushes through the room. Adela immediately tenses up and looks up to Philip, who's looking off into the distance. She reaches up and pulls on his lapel and motions over. You see a look of... You see his face almost fall as he sees this...

this person walking towards him. And as he does, you all feel the cold air that surrounds this entity as he walks past you. Walks right up to Philip. He's just a little bit shorter than Philip. And you hear him mumble to him that he needs to speak to him. Philip lowers his head and this person whispers to him,

You see a breadth of emotions move across Phil's face before eventually he nods. The gentleman turns around and almost military-style marches out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him. There is relative silence for a minute all but Jericho still singing up on the stage, having not stopped a single beat of his song during the course of all this. Go ahead. And I'll finish up.

Nobody claps.

Except for the two of you. Nobody else claps. Adela is just staring up at Philip, and he looks down at her, and immediately you see his face fall, and you hear her say, Oh, Phil, not now, honey. It's my birthday. Tell me it isn't so...

I'm sorry, honey. There's nothing I can do about it. It's stuff I've got to deal with. You know I wouldn't leave you on your birthday if I didn't have to. But I have to deal with this. We've got the masquerade, my darling. And he reaches down and he rubs his hand along her cheek. You've got your Taroka readings tonight. You've done one for me recently. You don't need to do another for me now. And I promise, I'll make it up to you tonight.

You see a sparkle lighten his eyes for a second. She looks up at him. You see a pout on her face. Your pouting's not going to work on me today. You know I've got to handle this. And he rubs his thumb along her bottom lip and her pout goes from a pout to an actual frown before he smooths it into a smile. Come on, honey, smile for me. You know I can't leave with you looking like that.

Eventually, a smile lights her face and she reaches up and squeezes his hand. All right, honey. Don't stay out too late, all right? It's my birthday. Now, maybe I can convince him to walk in the gardens with me later. He leans down, he kisses her cheek, he tells her he loves her. And then he motions to all of you and just nods to you as he takes his hat that had been resting on the top of his cane, he puts it on his head and he strides out without another word. Once he's like out of...

the room or out of earshot. And I feel like I can lean in to the other people at the table so that Adela can't hear so much. It's kind of like an aside just to-- - Yeah, she is watching Phil walk away and she looks sad but she's trying to keep up a brave face. - Perhaps Jericho's still on stage. Maybe he hasn't made it back. Maybe he's made it back. - He's like tuning his banjo. - Thank you, thank you. - I'll lean in to left again, Briggsian Say.

Well, this reminds me of... I do not like this. I'm drawing restless. No armor, no sword. And we're here, we're sitting here in this reprieve. It's nice, it's opulent, but we have to do something. All we can do is wait. We have much to learn about the different provinces, the lords and ladies of this place, about what is actually happening with Philip and the power struggles he seems to be contending with. And...

We must just enjoy this time. We must just...

Try to nourish ourselves in this luxury as long as we can. The horrors of whatever this land has in store for us can wait. I am rapidly growing tired of waiting. I mean, it's not that much longer. I mean, all we have to do is make it through and he's got our fucking artifacts. And that's the other thing too, I can't get that damn cup off my mind. We're so close to not being cursed.

We can hang in there. Oh, hold on. Play Bird What Is Free! Play Bird What Is Free! Well, that's mighty fi-- Bird What Is Free! Oh, Bird What Is Free! Oh, you know that one! Oh, I mean, gosh, I feel a little beset upon, but you're right, he's right. I do know Bird What Is Free. So anyway-- All right. We're in a spooky, horrific land of death full of crazy Halloween monsters.

I feel like, you know, he's got a lot on his shoulders and he seems to have, well he doesn't have a handle on the whole witch situation but other than that it seems to me like just a lot of spooky stuff happens all the time this is probably a very normal thing if I were to guess he is ruler of this land there are many demands on his attention if he needed us he would call on us fine so be it oh this is my favorite part

I know that I... Oh, no. Because I'm as free as a weird old gross crow now. And I know that I loved you and now I'm going to leave you and that's really sad. But I don't really care. You got a good laugh out of Derek with that one. It was the air. Spock. The air.

And I do the entirety of the, I do banjo solo. - Oh, the bass part's coming up. - And this happens. - I'm jamming.

Adela cheers up after about ten minutes or so, and though she does occasionally look towards the door almost wistfully, hoping that Phil will come back, she still continues to entertain the guests and chat with you. She talks to you about many things, and she is, you can tell, a little bit tipsy, but not too much. Just enough that she's having a good time as hour after hour passes, and

Throughout the evening, the dancing slows down, the band doesn't stop, but the types of music that they're playing takes on a more softer tone. And you begin to notice that

couple after couple after group after person starts to leave, until eventually the band is playing softly in the background and it's just you and Adela and the bartender and just a handful of the waiters as they're milling about taking any of your orders. And she seems to realize this as she looks around. "Well, it looks like the night's finally coming to a close. It's just us here."

Did you want to go ahead and do those taroka readings to get all stuffed? Did you need any dessert? I mean, I wouldn't mind a slice of cake. Oh, yeah, of course. And she motions for one of the waiters, and they head towards the gigantic birthday cake in the center of the table, and they cut off a huge slice of cake and bring it over to you. I bet this tastes real good. It's quite good. Well, um...

Maybe you're not ready for that one yet, but your kids are gonna love it! "I ain't been on Jericho sticks, you can call me Jericho, most folk do, good night!" "Oh great job Jericho sticks!" We're a rough crowd tonight folks! Thank you for applauding, I didn't get any tips, I had my hat out the whole time. Oh. Were you expecting tips? Well I don't know. I was, I mean, sometimes. I was kind of hoping. I know it's Miss Adele's birthday.

I can't afford any kind of prison for her. But here you go, Jericho. And she reaches down and she takes a beautiful strand of these iridescent pearls off of her neck and she hands it to you. Here's a tip for you. You can have these. This seems like it's worth quite a bit of coin here, Miss Adele. Oh, yeah. For me? For you.

For real and for true? For real and for true. Just for you. Well, you are mighty kind, Miss Della. I thank you. She jumps up from the table and she bounces around the chair and she gets up on her tiptoes and kisses you on the cheek. Thank you for playing for everyone tonight. I know they just loved it. You did a fantastic job.

Well, it's my birthday in Little Red Hen, fucking Freakland. Jericho!

Happy birthday, little blue bird, was joking on a birthday word. Watch your language! She giggles, her curls bounce, and she takes her seat back at the table. And a gold coin from me for the performance. Oh, Ms. Leathergold, thank you for this. Gosh, I don't think I've had this much wealth in my entire existence.

Garstin, what would Virgil say about this right now? I'll take it and I'll put it in my various pockets. It'll burst through my one pocket. Okay, this one just needs to sit up a little bit. The hand of bag comes up. I know that we haven't really seen eye to eye after you snapped that little girl's neck, but... Jesus. That's blood money, Jerry. Okay.

He's awfully generous. I suppose I can't say no to that. I can't turn it down. All right. Can't turn it down. Really bad eggs. We finish our cake. You do. Is there anything else that you need from us in order to do this reading? Oh, no, we just, I guess we'll adjoin to the study and get everything ready. We'll make it really aesthetic. It'll be lovely. Oh, I can't wait to learn my future.

This will certainly illuminate our path forward. Thank you for offering to do us a favor on your very wonderful birthday. You're looking a little stiff tonight, Briggsie. You can, like, relax a little. It's just me. Well, I mean, I'm trying to be polite and fit in with the upper crust. Oh, you're gonna have to worry about that tomorrow night at the Masquerade. Tonight's a night for relaxation. I know. Put your hair down.

I'm going to grab a drink for the road, then. All right. Well, get whatever you need. I'm going to head into the study and get it ready, and you head on in whenever you're ready. Okay, I'm up to

Good old sooty pot for the road. Sounds wonderful. We'll be right behind you. Adela quickly jumps up and she runs around the table and throws her arms around each of your shoulders and gives you a quick squeeze before grabbing a cocktail from the bar and rushing into the adjoining parlor. Immediately, you can see the lights in there dim as she clearly extinguishes a couple of the...

Gosh, you think I should have not played tugging on the birthday worm?

Probably not. I think many enjoyed it, though I wasn't sure how intoxicated they were. I feel like maybe I read the room wrong. Perhaps a little. Gosh, I could have swore I just thought that she was going to enjoy talking about the birthday word. Jericho, do you know the definition of the word euphemism? I don't know the meaning of the word. Well, I think the whole song was a euphemism.

No, it's about on your birthday, you save a bluebird's life by tugging the birthday worm out of its gullet. And then you get blessed by the magical bluebird benevolence they represent. Joy and happiness and good crops for a good season.

Good harvest. Perhaps that's literally what the lyrics might be saying. Yeah, it's like, "t-t-tell you how the birthday were." There's what we call subtext, Jericho. There are words beneath the words. It's pretty deep and metaphorical. How are they beneath the words?

But I don't know how else to say this, Jericho. The worm is a penis. The worm, the what? Jericho, the worm is a penis. Gosh, what's a penis? Take that from me, Harry! We should quickly head to the study. Thank you, Harry. Thank you, Harry.

And I'll follow until I... Oh, guys, that's Tootie Pop. You don't know how much money I would have paid to be scrimming this moment. All I'm going to do is ask Jericho to be out of penis. Maris would never, ever, ever do that. I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like... I'm going to hum it and it's like

You leave the kitchen, or you leave the dining room, and you head into the parlor.

It is here that Adela has the room completely set up. You see a circular table in the very center. You see five plush chairs around it. A very low fire crackling in the hearth directly behind her, casting her in shadows as she has thrown a transparent,

dark purple shawl around her shoulders that's dotted in silver beads that makes it almost look like the night sky as she...

sits at the table and you see that there is a deck of Taroka cards laid out on the table. And she's muttering to herself and looking down at the cards, occasionally picking one up and looking at it and humming to herself before putting it back down. And as you enter, she can almost sense it as she quickly whips the cards up and begins to shuffle them. All right, so who wants to go first?

I'll scan the room. Take a seat, take a seat! I imagine that she has darkened most of the room. She's put transparent pieces of fabric, gauzy pieces of fabric over the lanterns and dimmed them enough that they won't catch fire, but that it disperses the light in a very evocative way. The room is exactly as you would imagine it.

Lethica could stand for it to be a little darker, so she uses Shadow Snap to extinguish a few more of the lanterns just to bring everything down. Okay, oh, we really wanted to be dark and spooky here, all right. I care not who goes first. I just wanted to make sure we were all in the mood. So, Mary, how do you reckon he thinks you got first in the first place?

Jericho? How does Jericho reckon that I was cursed? Well if he doesn't know what a penis is! Now is not the time for this conversation! Let's get it over with! Briggsie, please! Alright! Gosh! Well take a seat, come on in! Pardon us for our delay, we're ready. Who wants to go first? Oh, how do we pick an order? Why, just whoever wants to go first! Ooh, should we draw straws? Oh!

Or was it like, oh, whoever's oldest goes first? We could draw some straws. One, two, three, four. Oh, that's a great idea. And I'll pull out four straws from my sleeve. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of Avantris and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas. Shroud over salt marsh.

You can also go to thecrookedmoon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tome for Dungeons & Dragons 5th edition. And don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you. All right, so which one of you wants to go first? You're going to draw lots?

Well, yes, I pulled some straw out of my... Oh, perfect. On account of being a scarecrow, I've got plenty of extra straw. It seems parallel to the randomness of the card drawings. Yeah, sure. To the random order. It might have a little bit of gargoyle demon eye core and perhaps a little bit of weasel familiar guts and other stuff that we faced and fought, but it's no worse for wear. Well, I'll draw last because I plucked them. And most of us couldn't possibly be any more cursed than we already are, so... I want to go first.

Okay. Don't let me look though, because I technically cut these. In the Meadow of the Universe. Let me pull this one. This one feels nice. Well, mighty fine. Nice choice, Briggsie. I'll draw next. Nice choice, Sir Marius. I think this is going to be the long one. Nice choice, Miss Lethika. Nice choice, Jericho. Perhaps we should compare. Let's compare straws, eh? Let's compare sticks. Straws, that is. Straws.

Well, gosh, I got the long straw! I'm third, Jericho's last, Lethka's first, and Briggs is second. It seems that I have drawn the short straw. All right, well, I guess I need you to shuffle the cards, and then shuffle while you're shuffling the cards, think about all the things that have happened to you, what you want to know, and when you feel like you're done, back to me. You shuffled so nicely, Miss Lethka. Thank you. That's what I was going to say. This is not my first time.

Well, you're full of surprises, ain't ya? I don't know why Virgil's so suspicious of ya. Right, I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna... I cut the deck for ya. And then what I want you to do is I want you to take this. Yes. And I want you to flip over the first card you see. Or the first card on the top. The Priest. Look, the Priest is a beacon of faith and spiritual guidance. This card signifies a time of reflection and inner peace.

A call to seek higher truths and moral clarity. The priest guides towards compassion, wisdom, and understanding. Embrace the teachings that resonate with your soul and find solace in your faith. I mean, it's U to a T! That's exactly right!

They really are magic cards, see, Briggsie? Does the first card come in an order or a position on the table? Is it the present or something along those lines? Well, some people want to think of this in the past, present, future tense. Really, it can be that way. It's up to the cards to decide. It feels very appropriate. Interesting. All right, the next card. The Trader.

That's... alright. Interesting. The traitor reveals betrayal and deceit. This card warns of false friends and hidden enemies. Those who smile to your face while plotting your downfall. Trust must be earned, and the traitor reminds you to guard your heart and be wary of those who seek to deceive. Unmask the betrayers and protect yourself from treachery. No way that it could possibly mean any of us.

Can I ask a question? Sure. If that's allowed, this sort of thing.

Is it possible that the traitor is Lethika herself? I guess it's possible. That's not... But it seems more like it's talking about someone Lethika knows. But then who does Lethika know better than herself? The next card, Lethika, if you would. Oh, I should say that. Where is Virgil, by the way? No, I don't know. Probably perched somewhere doing something naughty. Oh. Do you have a way of calling him? Virgil? Virgil?

I know you're technically in there. Are you snooping around somewhere? Virgil? Well, I'm getting a... I'll call him later. Sorry, I don't want to interrupt your reading. Oh, it's very rude. The mist. The mist's an enigmatic... an enigma shrouded in uncertainty.

This card signifies a journey into the unknown, where clarity is obscured and paths are hidden. Embrace the mystery and venture forth with courage, for the myths conceal both danger and opportunity. Trust in your instincts and navigate the fog with confidence. Well, that's positive. Oh, that was sort of Yorgie's thing. Yes. Yeah, but with Yorgie gone...

Someone's gotta be in tune with the mists, right? Well, and wasn't that what your, uh... what that... I didn't mean to peek over your shoulder, but isn't that what Mr. Druskinbald said? Lord Druskinbald, I mean. About what you were gonna receive? Does it have to do with something with the mists? Vinel. Excuse me? You're speaking of the treasure that I am going to visit? Yeah, that strange-looking bell. It's with a B.

I thought that was... Yeah. Just the bear, yes. No, it is. Jericho's an idiot. Oh, okay. Confusing bear. That's a type of horse. I don't think that that is true, but perhaps from where you come from, I... Doesn't know his horses. I will navigate with as much confidence as I can muster. Great, that was a wonderful reading. Mostly. Who's next?

Oh. It's Briggs' turn. It's my turn. You got the third straw. All right, go ahead and shuffle the cards. There you go, Briggs. Good luck. The miss. Oh. The miss. I don't certainly pretend to know what these cards mean, but perhaps we must press on. It's just saying that we have to be resilient. What if it's past, present, and future? Then you...

You was a priest. Priestess. Pardon me. The present is a traitor. A traitor, which will then lead to the mist in the future. Well, gosh, that's awfully suspicious. How many times do I suffer this? Just until you feel in your very core that the cards are speaking to you. So the last one I had is done.

The fella that did it, he would sing a little song while he did it. Is that normally part of reading like this? No, not any that I've done, but if you want to sing a song, if it'll make you feel better. Oh, no, no, it wasn't me who sang it. It was, you know, he was singing about the past, the present, and the future, you know? All right. Go ahead and read that, Brandon. Right, I'm going to go ahead and cut the deck for you. And now I need you to go ahead and flip over the top card for me. Good luck. Uh-huh.

The Swashbuckler. Oh! Gosh! Oh, that's so what I am! It is! The Swashbuckler dances on the edge of danger, a symbol of daring and adventure. This card speaks of bold moves and audacious plans, urging you to embrace your courage and take risks. Life is a grand tale of adventure, and the Swashbuckler reminds you to seize the moment and live with passion. Oh, that's so right.

That was a great one! Wow. I'm starting to think this isn't coincidence. The Executioner. The Executioner. A grim reminder of finality and judgment. This card signifies the end of a cycle, a decisive action that cannot be undone. It calls for clarity and resolve to act with conviction and accept the consequences. The Executioner's blade is swift, cutting through doubt and hesitation.

That's so bad. Is Briggsie gonna die? You gonna kill somebody? I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You can pull it. The Dark Lord.

The Dark Lord embodies power and tyranny. This card warns of a figure of immense influence, one who rules through fear and dominance. It may also reflect your own struggle with authority and control. Confront the Dark Lord within or without, and challenge the oppressive forces that seek to bind you. Why is mine so much spookier? It certainly appears to be ominous.

There's only chance that this Dark Lord is referencing that Mr. Crossroads you're always talking about. Yeah, I think it probably is. Well, who's the Executioner, though? If it's not him, unless he's also the Executioner, and maybe he's even a swashbuckler, and it's not even me! How do you feel about this Mr. Crossroads? You seem to speak about him with at least some sort of favor. You never seem scared of him in the past. Well, he's a tricksy bastard who fucking, you know, pulled...

and pulled the wool over my eyes and got the better of me. The better of me greed. But is he really evil? No, I mean, how do you define evil? He has his own aims and his own machinations, I suppose. Did they involve Dark Lorditude? Perhaps it's not him. It was simply a question.

What if the Dark Lord's gonna swashbuckle me head from me shoulders? I'm not so sure that the cards are supposed to be that literal. I don't think it loops back around, Briggsie. Unless I'm misunderstanding. Oh, it doesn't lock up. Does it loop back around? What if it's cyclical? I mean, they can. I was under the impression that it was a bit more of a metaphorical thing.

If it doesn't loop around. What if I swashbuckle his head from his shoulders? What if you're the traitor that Lethika's worried about and you're gonna sweat from her shoulders? Oh! Well then, who's the Dark Lord? Am I the Dark Lord? Do you become the Dark Lord? Does Briggsie become the Dark Lord? Oh gosh. Don't look so excited about it. That's not a good thing, Briggsie. I'm not a Dark Lord.

I swear! Well, Briggs, I think you'd make a mighty fine Dark Lord if one of us had to be one. Oh, you really think so? I mean, if he's not wrong, I do think that's true. But you shouldn't want to become one of those. They're bad. No. I wouldn't be a Dark Lord. Virgil always says it's always better for a fool and charlatan motivated by simple base pleasures and greed to get elevated to power because they're easy to manipulate and utilize for your own aims.

All right, well, moving on, Marius, do you want to go ahead and shuffle the deck? I do not believe you are a dark lord, Rixi. Nor do I believe that you're going to betray me or cut off my head if you could. My eyes narrow at Jericho as I begin to shuffle the cards. And while I'm shuffling the cards, I'm thinking about what Adela told us, about thinking about what we want to know.

And Marius wants to know how did Philip Druskinvold get that damn cup? And he's thinking about wanting to know the future and the answers, and the whole time that he's thinking and shuffling, all he can hear is the thump, thump, thump of Lechicus' heartbeat, and it's extremely frustrating.

Here, I'm finished. Oh, that took you much longer than everyone else. You must have had a lot on your mind. Yes. All right, if you want to go ahead, can I cut the deck for you? All right, I'm ready. The Avenger...

Oh.

It's totally your thing. That's a good one. That's so you. Yeah, it's basically you. Just like Swashbuckler was me and Priest was me. And Priest is. That's exactly right. The pattern does seem to be emerging. Oh, I think I'll have a nice first card. I am the one who Swashbuckles. There isn't much on this planet that gives me pause. But I'm worried about flipping the next card. Oh, it's going to be all right. The tempter...

The tempter whispers of desires and forbidden fruits. This card warns of temptations that seek to lead you astray. Promises of power and pleasure that come with a steep price. Beware of this seductive allure, for the tempter's gifts are often poisoned. Keep your heart and mind steadfast against the siren's call. Could have used that card nearly 80 years ago.

Maybe it's not about who you think it is. I'm not so sure I'd fall for the same tricks twice. There's no one else that you're feeling tempted by? The Beast!

The beast represents primal instincts and untamed furiosity. This card reveals the wild nature within, a force of raw power and unbridled emotion. Embrace the strength of the beast, but be wary of losing yourself to its savage urges. Balance your inner beast with wisdom and control. I was confiding in my friends earlier that I've been restless. Being here, as wonderful as it is...

Look at this fucking nightmare!

Oh god, I'm so glad I got the Dark Lord! Princey! He can't say that just 'cause he got a spooky, terrible reading! Oh, I mean, oh, look at the art on that card! No, no, he's right. This is...concerning. Something dark, deep within. Isn't there, Marius? Perhaps. That's why we're being warned of it, so we can do things about it. Well... Derrico, take the cards. I guess...I guess I'm next.

I guess there's no one else? No other straws? No one? Well, okay. I'm a little-- Sorry, sorry. Do you-- I somehow have a dexterousness when it comes to instruments. When it comes to implements-- Jericho, just do a mash shuffle. Spread them all around. What's a mash shuffle? It's when you spread them around and they pile. Actually, it's the most random way to shuffle a deck of cards. Oh. I ain't no card slinger. I ain't no hustler.

Oh, I don't want to be nerdy mates that played Marshal the Scattering Shuffle that way. Okay, is this character Miss Adela? That's fine, isn't that fine, Adela? Yeah, whatever works for you. I'm sorry, I...

Yeah, no, that's fine. Just don't bend them or anything. I'm being gentle. I'm being gentle. That's why I'm doing this. I don't want to hurt your cards. It is a lovely deck. Thank you. You must have had it for some time. Oh, yeah, for as long as I can remember. I don't even remember where they came from. I got them when I was a little girl. Really? Without Virgil here, I don't have any of the dexterousness. He's really leaving me hanging. Really feel put out? Okay, well, here you go, Miss Adela. All right.

I'm gonna go ahead and cut the deck for you. And now if you want to go ahead and pass that back. Alright, Jericho, I can get this done right away. Here we go. Write, The Marionette. The Marionette is a symbol of control and manipulation. This card speaks of unseen forces pulling the strings, bending your will to their desires. Beware of those who seek to dominate your actions, for you may find yourself a puppet in a grander scheme.

Look closely at those around you. Trust is a fragile thread easily severed. Gosh, why does everyone get something cool? Couldn't they have the tunesmith or the minstrel? The songbird. The songbird, the troubadour. The sweetheart. The sweetheart, that's exactly right. It stands to reason, Jerry, I mean. The house.

How many options are there? I mean, what are the odds that somebody who wrote a deck of cards, you know, ages and ages ago, thought of, oh...

banjo playing song singing scarecrow fella. - Perhaps that will be the next card to represent your present. - Yeah. - You're right. - 'Cause your past was a little spooky ooky, right? So it goes to saying that your past card would be a little iffy, but maybe your present and your future will be great. - Present will be just fine. Okay, I'm pulling it. Let's go. - The dungeon. - Dungeon. Dungeon. - Yeah, the dungeon. Dungeon signifies confinement and isolation.

It probably gets better. You may find yourself trapped, either physically or within the prison of your own mind. This card urges you to seek the key to your release, to break free from the shackles that bind you. But remember, even the darkest dungeon has a hidden door to freedom. It's positively- Well, maybe this is a good thing. Yeah. There's a door to freedom. I don't know if I like that wording necessarily.

Could be fine. Cars, what are you thinking? I mean... I think maybe... I'm doing a jailbreak, like... Remember that song I played? Not a prisoner... Oh lord, oh lord... I'm a free bird... Tonight is gonna be a jailbreak... Well, that one, that is a great one. That's a great tune, yeah. Oh. It's difficult. And I have a question for you. The skinny lizards. The several times that... Virgil, or whatever you want to call it, comes forth. Do you feel trapped?

Do you feel alone? Are you aware of what happens when that entity is brought forth? Well, I mean, it's dark. And it kind of feels like I'm in a metal confining device. Like a cave? Like a perch. Bird cave? But I guess what's interesting is that ever since Virgil had a bit of a taste of old gargoyle demon and Balor and

Knights of Sin and such, and the Archbishop and his love for cream puffs. Ever since I go in there, it's different. Like, it's me, and it's Virgil. But there's something else in there with us. Like, Virgil's trapped in there too. There's something else. And it speaks through Virgil, and it's angry, and it's awful, awful crass, of course. And I'm mighty afeard of it. And it's not Virgil?

Well, I thought it was, but Virgil was... had Virgil something else? I don't know. I'm just confused. I ain't smart enough to... to parse any of that out. Jericho, I hope that you find the key to your freedom soon. Well, perhaps we will, and that'll finally shut old Virgil up. Have you ever been swimming, Jerry? I've been sinking. I knew an old pirate named Don John.

He ran a surf shop. I wonder if... What's surfing? Oh, it's a long story. Probably just a coincidence. Maybe it's about that we're both... Anyways, the next card will probably be fine. The future. The Raven. That's not so bad, probably. Oh. The Raven, a harbinger of messages from beyond. This card brings omens and secrets. Truths whispered on the wings of night.

Pay heed to the signs and symbols that cross your path, for they carry vital knowledge. The raven calls for vigilance and an open mind in the mysteries of the world. - That's a dumb question. Are we sure? Have any of us ever actually checked to see if Virgil is a crow and not a raven? Is it obvious? - I would say yeah, it's obvious that he's a crow. - I mean, I certainly would not say that Marius is a bird expert. - That's a little, I mean, it's a little wrong.

Oh, it's close enough. I mean, this seems pretty straightforward. Yes, how strange. That was fun, wasn't it? The Rookareens! Oh, yeah, that was really fun. Oh, happy birthday! Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Happy birthday, Adela. Happy birthday, Miss Adela. Are you all just obvious right now? Very.

And it helps that we are in such a beautiful place of luxury, which you... Aw, thank you. ...you have crafted with your husband. I sure do love my home, and I'm so happy to have you as my guests. We're happy to be here. Is there anything else that you want on your last few hours of your birthday? Oh, yeah. I was hoping that maybe we could go on a walk through the gardens tonight. I mean, at this time, they're absolutely beautiful with where the moon is in the sky. Oh, yeah.

You just can't beat it. That sounds delightful. Second it. I... I... We would be honored. Gosh, that sounds like the perfect thing to do after a ball or a dance or a birthday... ...soiree.

That's what Brickstallamina would always say. Well, let me-- To go on an evening stroll in the gardens. Let me go change out of this outfit. It's a little too fancy. And she shimmies and all of the little beads jingle in the firelight and catch the light. Let me go put on something a little more appropriate for garden walking and-- oh, from here?

It shouldn't be too difficult to figure out. Since we're leaving the inside of the house, I think it might be best if you get dressed into what you're most comfortable in. The Moors can be a bit dangerous sometimes. And if anything were to happen, I would want to make sure I was protected. Not to worry you or anything, I'm sure I'll be fine. I just... No, no, please. There's no need to explain yourself. We will...

philips not at the chateau right now and i am worried pardon me i'll just be honest i'm gonna spill all the beans i want to look out over the barrows just want to make sure everything's okay

We will happily escort you and more and more we are becoming defenders of this land. Yeah. You are very much a part of it and it would be an honor to be at your side. Plus, I've been out of my armor for far too long. I need the weight of my sword on my head. I'm good like this. Well, if you don't want to change, that's totally fine. If you want to change, love it. I'm going to change because this is not as comfortable as it is.

Four or five wine glasses previous, so I'm going to go get into something that's in the tummy. I'll be ready in 10 or 15 minutes. Great. Where should we meet? Why don't we meet in the entranceway, and we'll head on out through the back door out to the gardens. Done. Okay. Well, I'll see you in about 10. See you in 15.

Birthday waltz through the hedgerows. She hops down off of the seat and quickly rushes out of the door and deep into Chateau Clair de Lune, where you imagine she's heading to get changed. Well, none of you need anything. That's fine. I have to go get my armor and my weapon. Take me ten minutes and I can meet you at the front. Well, I was just getting used to the powdered wig and the fancy clothes. Certainly don't have to change. No one's going to make you.

Well, what if I trip in the bogs or whatever she said? Barrows. Oh. Well, what if I trip in the barrows? The moors. It's fine. Barrows and moors, isn't that like wet? Maybe a little swampy. I'm not sure. I haven't been back there yet. I just don't know the meaning of the word. I don't think I can help you. I'll join you. All right.

I will return with Marius to put on my filthy clothes. Yeah, we would just go quick. And I would take ten minutes to don my armor. Between the two of you, you get lost a couple of times, but you're quick enough that you're able to eventually find the room, don your armor, and head back towards the entranceway where I'm assuming Jericho and Lethika are going to meet. I very quickly would remind Jericho to keep on lookout for Vergil.

And then before getting up and making my way to get dressed myself, would reach over for the tarot deck if it's still there. Yeah, she left it on the table. I'd shuffle it and... And then I would get up and... I wouldn't see that. What cards did you pull? It's very interesting. Very interesting. Did you just pull three random cards on the top? Yeah. Okay. One...

Two. I didn't see it. So the idea is that Lethega was just trying to see what would happen. You were just shuffling around. Just as a quick glance for her own... Thank you. Just curious. Yeah. Interesting. Once we're... Once our armor is done and we're changing to our fully clothed, Marius would be happy to feel the weight of his sword like hanging from his hip again.

No shield, obviously. And the weight of his armor on his body would make him feel good again. Like, he's missed being a warrior. And again, as much as the opulence is nice and the rest is nice, there's a yearning to get back in the field and do something of worth that he feels is worthy. Are you ready? I'm as ready as I'm gonna be. All right, the others should be waiting at the entrance. Let's hurry. All right. As we're walking back,

Virgil will fly up towards him. Oh! Virgil, you're back! Oh no, I know it. We were both there. We saw you. You've been just looking at the key that whole time? We know that it's genuine. What does that have to do with Miss McDuff? Gosh, you're talking crazy lately. I don't know what to do with you. Yeah, there was a raven. How's that feeding? You're a crow. That's preposterous.

You're speaking nonsense. We're going on to walk through the gardens. Why don't you go keep looking and snooping around like you do? Get out of my hair, buzz off! And, uh, Virgil will fly off. On our way back. While we're walking, hauling over to Marius. So, uh, I mean, um... Well, Adela's pretty perceptive, don't you think?

Um, I suppose so. She's been known to have some sort of extra sensory perception of some kind, glimpsing the future. No, I'm just saying that temptress card came up and I think she knew exactly what it meant. You think she knew exactly what it meant? I think everybody knows exactly what it meant. What do you think that it means, Brixie? Oh, Mary. Come on. It's obvious. Enlighten me. You, Lefica...

Two unreasonably attractive companions, sharing secret private moments together more frequently than one might expect? There are no secret private moments, and the only temptation from Lethika is the taste of her blood. Well, I mean, you know, you kept glancing down at her chest. I would never! Briggsie! I'm a gentleman, a knight! I meant, get where her heart would be, Marius!

I'm not so sure that's what you meant, Briggsie! Well... you'll never know what I meant. I'm just saying. Give me a break, Briggsie! I'm doing the best that I can here! Everybody knows it. And, you know... What's to harm, is all I'm gonna say, you know? Do you understand what the thirst is like? Do you know what it's like now that I've tasted humanoid blood?

I mean... I don't want the others to know! I don't want Rethika to know! How difficult this is for me! I'm struggling here! So is it. I mean, how bad is it? I mean... Bad! It's very, very bad! Is there something I can do? No, I don't think so. I don't think there's anyone... anyone... anything anyone can do. I'm not sure how... really, if what I have is considered blood...

You know, I don't know if it scratches the same sort of itch, but I'm happy to, you know, drain some of it for you. One, gross. Two, you have no heartbeat, alright? That's fair. I'd have to, like, scoop it out again. I'm not sure how it would manage. Enough of this! I need that damn cup! We're close, alright? You and I, we're both gonna have heartbeats. It won't just be Laffika. So you won't have any excuse to stare at a chest anymore.

Regardless of the temptation, I'm not going to fall again. I'm not going to give in again. Whatever happened when we were back there, I wasn't conscious. It wasn't me, I was in a dream. And then I awoke and the next thing I knew it was what had happened. Look, I'll get it. You know, I've been in the heat of the moment. You know, feeling things. You're incorrigible. I swear. No, what I mean is if we're in the heat of combat.

And all of a sudden I'm like, "Mmm, I'm a little hungry." I'm just a wee bit peckish. I'll take a bite of some nasty, disgusting, gross thing. And it doesn't taste good. I can't even fucking taste it. I would assume it doesn't taste good. But I feel some kind of urge to consume. I mean, it's not very strong, but it's there. I haven't told anyone this. That almost happened to me against one of the hags. Ooh. Yeah.

I was worried what might happen if I drank the blood. I resisted the urge. I mean, they're certainly not human. Humanoid, or whatever they might be, but it weighs on my mind. What would have happened if I had consumed hangs of blood? Do you think you would have gotten like magical powers? Like shapeshifting into a gross pigeon weasel? I think it would have been very bad. It weighs heavily on my mind. I'll just get temporary hit points. I mean, it's not that...

The others are waiting. You're on. Let's go. He's only gotten one boot on. I'm as free as a bird what is free.

It is around this time that you all convene in the entryway, and you see that this is a large portion of this chateau. The way that it's shaped is almost square-like as the wings come out on either side. And this entryway is large. It extends the entire width of the main portion of the chateau, and though there is an entryway directly in from the front, there is also a...

A large glass double door that leads out to the patio out back and eventually down into the gardens that look out over the rest of the moors and potentially the barrows as you've been told. And it is here that you find yourselves in this hall, in this area. You all meet up? It is strange to put on this outfit again. I know it had not been so much time but

It has been such a nice thing to have different outfits during our time here. I don't know. I feel good. I feel better. I feel strong again. And safe, yes. Though I admit I miss the silk pajamas. Or miss more frilly cuffs. Well, my jacket and sitch are getting a little ratty and worn. Maybe I can have one of them fine tailors, the very kindly Mr. Old Henri, to make up some...

folksy clothes that might be more comfortable. I think that would be wise. It would be nice to have a few patch-ups here and there. That'd be nice. I'm really looking forward to enjoying a nice garden stroll after all the dark things and Lord Druskin being all preoccupied about things going on. Everyone's a little on edge. You look a little on edge, Marius. We all should be. We need to be on guard. We heard what Adela said.

Things might be happening. It might be dangerous where we're going. Hopefully it will just be a routine walk and we're keeping an eye on her for filler. But be ready for anything. And it is at this time that you hear the sound of soft footfalls in the stairwells that come down around leading from the second floor down to this main floor area. And you see descending those stairs is Adela in a beautiful white cotton dress that looks perfect for strolling through the gardens.

She has her hair piled up on top of her head. She has a little bit of baby's breath nestled into the coiffure. And she looks radiant, spectacular. As she slowly makes her way down the stairs, she trips a little bit on the hem of her dress, but writes herself and giggles.

That was not planned. She falls down, her neck breaks, and she's dead! That's very funny. I cast Revivify.

It doesn't work, her soul does not want to return. No, she makes it down the stairs easily as she joins you. I'm so ready, are you ready? We should only be down there for a little bit, I think. And you wanted to go to the bed of, you said. Well, I don't want to go to the bed of. So as you saw when we were at the house that once was crooked and now doesn't exist at all,

Do you know the nature of this control? Is it...

an agreement that they have with Philip or does he truly command them and their thoughts their actions oh I don't think he commands their thoughts I'm sure they can think whatever they want but you know they belong to him they work for him they're his to control how he does it I don't know I've never spoken to him before like sworn an ancient oath type thing yeah kind of like that like the great tales you can tell they just love him though

They would do anything to keep him safe. They were right at his side the moment he learned you were in danger. Oh, yeah. And they love me too by proxy, of course. So, I don't know. I just feel unsettled. Phil hasn't been himself the past couple of... Ever since, you know, what happened at the house that used to be crooked but doesn't exist at all anymore. And so, he's obviously got stuff going on with the Iron Maiden and...

And he's got... He's got whatever's going on and some of the other areas of Druskinwald and it's just... I don't know. I'm just worried about him. He's got a lot on his mind. Yeah, I know his conversations with Charlotte Headey didn't work out very well, but, you know, he can't solve everybody's problems. And then... He thought that was the worst of it and then he got that... He got that message from Headmistress Voss and now everything in Astromar is a...

Going all to pardon my French, all to heck, and I just don't know what to do to help him. No matter how hard I try, it just seems like I'm...

I'm gonna be honest. And she's leading you into the gardens at this point. The moon shining down over these beautiful towering hedges that lead out to what is very clearly a hedge maze. They're dotted with different flowers and it's all quite beautiful to behold as she walks out into this scene. And it's just, he always looks at me with so much love and affection, you know, but lately I feel like I'm irritating him.

When I try and talk to him, he just doesn't want to listen, and he doesn't care, and his thoughts are here and there and everywhere else, and I don't know what to do or how to help, and...

Well, I'm sure it's not your fault at all. And he doesn't mean anything by it. I'm sure just having the crown and, you know, ruling the whole land as a lord as he does with all of them provinces and especially all of them witches, it's got to be stressful. I know, Jericho, and that's what I tell myself, but it's my birthday. It's more important that he's out dealing with that than it probably is, but he's not even here.

Where he went to, I don't know. Somewhere in Druskinvold, but he's not here. To leave me alone like this with the masquerade only a day in the future, it's just a lot. It's a lot for a poor girl in a Reikinhardt.

The whole time that we're walking, I'm listening intently to what Adela is saying, and without even thinking, my hand is resting on the hilt of my sword, just the second nature of being back in my suit of armor with my weapon at my side, and I'm just taking in what she's saying while taking in the surroundings that are happening as well around us. So I don't know, I'm just a little... Oh, that's so... Oh, Phil must have done that. Look at this beautiful statue of Agri.

Oh, whoa. Oh, nice. That's a difficult question to answer. Yeah? Well, uh, I mean, usually what I do is I just, I'll do whatever they say and...

And then if that's not enough, I do even more. And then if that's not enough, I'll break myself if needed. Oh, Jericho, honey. And scrap affection and her kind words. No, don't do that to Jericho. Keep it in game, brother. Oh, Jericho. Yes. That's really, that's so sad. And she rushes up to give you a big hug. I hope one day you find someone that would never ask that of you, you know, that...

be the one to ask for things and they'd give you stuff and you could give them stuff when they ask and it would just be oh my gosh look at this statue of a pegasus that's giddy oh he must have done it for my birthday oh it's huge look at its wingspan it looks a little like dawn hey look marius both big big old wings oh what's dawn dawn is my trusty steed you got a pegasus for a steed oh no no no wings on dawn just faithful steed

who managed to even find me here. A howl rents the air coming up off of the moors. Sounds very much like the howl of a wolf, but significantly louder and deeper and more ferocious. Giant, almost.

Adela jumps back and Jericho, you feel her body as she slams into you, as she stumbles back into you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. The wings of the pegasus causing the shadows to consume you as the light of the moon

can't hit you from this angle. And as she, you can feel her shivering nervously against you as all of your shadows begin to get larger and larger and larger and then shrink back into the hedges. Did you hear that? Did you see that? Is that normal? Like it's a totally normal thing that happens out here on the moors? It's what it's like the howling. It's sure wolves are, but that sounded big.

Doesn't that sound big? I was gonna say, that's not normal, like, moor-sized wolves? No, that's not big, big-sized wolves. You said that there are dangers here at Beyond. Yeah, of course there are wolves. As everyone is talking, I'm kind of listening as my ears have perked up to where the sound was, and as I have resting my hand on the handle of my sword, I kind of close my eyes and concentrate as I want to use my divine sense

As an action, I can detect good and evil until the end of my next turn. I can sense anything affected by the Hallow spell or know the location of any celestial feet and undead within 60 feet that's not behind total cover. So I'm trying to sense if there is some evil afoot. - You sense... Briggsie, are you considered undead?

From a certain point of view. I would say you roughly sense Briggsy. But within 60 feet, I would say you don't get the sense of anything like that. Strange. I would like you to roll a perception check for me, though. Something feels off, but... Yeah, it really does. Oh my gosh, a hydra statue. Look at all of its heads. I can't put my finger on it with a 13.

Adela? Yeah? Are you sure you know where we are walking? Oh yeah, we're in the hedge maze and I know my way through the hedge maze. It's just these statues that we're seeing, they're gigantic, beautiful, of course, very well sculpted. But they weren't here yesterday. My guess is Philip is doing something for the masquerade. Oh, we're probably going to have some kind of... Do you think he'll do fireworks? Oh,

Maybe he didn't even leave for work. Do you think it's possible he didn't even leave for work? What if he's doing something special for me and here I am being a silly billy and all mopey and whiny and stuff and he's probably out doing something so sweet. I hope so. That may very well be true. It is a nice thought. Okay, but that hellhound statue is making me a little bit uncomfortable. I don't like its eyes. Are you noticing that they're getting a little more concentrated?

Feel like it took a while to walk in between the last few and now it's like, oh, yep, there's a manta core. And you've never seen any of these before? Oh, no. I mean, we have statues all around and stuff, but they're normally statues of people. Like, you saw the fountain out front with the beautiful dancer. Oh, that was mighty fine sculpting. Yeah, clearly not made by the same person, but yeah, these are just absolutely wild. Oh, but there's a chimera.

- Right there, don't turn around, Marius. - You think maybe Philly's just decorating? - No, that's what I'm saying, I think so. It's just strange that he didn't tell me. - I mean, I seem to get the sense that-- - Oh, God, do you smell that? And all of a sudden you breathe in and you smell what smells like putrid stink of low tide, rotting fish,

It is overwhelming as the wind brings it past your nose. Adela looks sallow and like she's on the verge of retching. And just as quickly as it came, it's completely gone. That was awful. Adela, stay close to us. Yeah. Wait, what did it smell like? It smelled like the putrid smell of low tide, rotting fish, fish.

Like, fetid sea salt. Oh, sorry. That's my bad. Is that through?

- Oh, I don't know, you're all just grimacing in disgust, so I figured you were just smelling this. - You hear the sound of flapping wings and Adela immediately looks up and you see what appears to be a large amassment of carrion birds as they circle overhead. - After we hear these wings, the next thing everyone will hear is the sound of steel as it's coming out of my scabbard as I hold it with two hands. - I'll be gripping my chakram and I'm going to

Take a few steps to the nearest statue, perhaps the chimera. Yeah, as you're, you've walked, because you've continued to walk as she's leading you through the maze, and you, as you round the next corner, you see two sphinx statues that she looks at. She didn't say anything this time, but she clearly doesn't recognize them. I'll walk up. I'm going to just put my hand and...

touch the stone surface of one of these statues. I want to get a sense of if it feels real. Roll a perception check. Oh my gosh, I have to roll? Yeah, no, I got it. I'm looking for my first roll of the session.

I'm gonna use a twist. Use a twist. No. Love that. I don't have a twist work anymore. Oh, you're right. I get an 11. It feels like a statue. The only thing that seems strange is it feels warm, like it's been out in the sun all day, but as you know, there is no sun in Druskin Vault. The statue feels warm to the touch.

Adela, I know that you wanted to make it through this maze, but I wonder if it is best we turn back. I mean, the arrows are just on the other side, and with all of this strange stuff happening, I need to know. You don't have to come with me if you're worried, but... No, we will stay at your side, and it is your birthday. I just need to know that everything's all right, that they're where he left them. Um... I mean... What if...

They're warm just because they were freshly made. Is that how that works? No, I don't know. I don't know how to sculpt. As you say that, a strange music, sounds of a pipe organ, are carried on by the wind coming up off of the furthest parts of the moors. A soft, minor tune, melancholy, sad, as it plays hauntingly against the air. Where?

I mean, that's kind of a sad, melancholic tune. Do you think it's coming? Do the Moors carry a tune like that? Perhaps one of the other mansions we saw of the visiting lords? Perhaps in a celebration ahead of the masquerade? I know that Charlotte Headey, the Iron Maiden, really likes music, but this kind of sound isn't her thing. It's...

She's a little more upbeat, a little more rock and roll really and that's a lot more melancholy and

And you see as she knocks a huge spider off of her shoulders and jumps back as down from another statue in front of her, another, a griffin, you see a trail of spiders just running down the statue. And you look all around you and the hedge maze that surrounds you seems to be moving with hundreds

thousands of spiders. Adela screams and charges forward, running into a hellhound statue as she falls backwards and lands on the ground, but she looks around and she sees there are no more spiders in this section of the hedge maze. She's panting and her heart's beating. Marius, you can hear the sound of the blood pumping through her body.

Mr. Della? Della. I don't think it's a good idea to be here. I think that maybe we take one quick look at the barrows and we get out of here. This is awfully spooky. We're just not going back through those spiders. Della, I need you to calm down.

I'm trying. Yes, please get control of your heart, please. I'm a bit arachnophobic. Just here, let me give you a hug. I'm going to draw the attention away from you. I'm going to make sure that you're safe, okay? You get down to your knees to give her a hug as she is sprawled on the ground, as both of you are completely consumed by mist that's spilling in from the moors ahead.

But it looks different, not like the same mist that you know surrounds all of Druskinvald. It is the same mist, but the light that reflects off of it isn't that almost perfect blue-green light that you remember so fondly from Jörgrim's Lantern. There's a darkness to it, a change to it, as it wraps up around you cold.

and then quickly spills out over the rest of the ground and almost dances and moves with you as Adela moves one way and you move the other. It's almost as if the mist follows you for a minute before it slowly starts to retreat back and you watch as it makes its way in the direction that you're heading towards the barrows and the moors ahead. I want to keep Adela's eyes if I can. I want to hold her and just sort of, this is...

I'm going to channel my faith and protect you as best I can. It's going to be a little strange, okay?

and I'm going to look at her, and as I do, my height shrinks to her height, and my mask starts to change towards evoking her features. She starts to feel like she's looking into a mirror as my hair changes from white to her curled brown hair. I'm going to, my outfit, my corset, everything changes to the white cotton gown, and as I cast Disguise Self to make myself look exactly like Adela Druskinvault.

Her heart continues to beat the same way. Oh, that's a great parlor trick. I bet there's a spider on my back. Can you look? Can you look? The one there is clearly nothing. It's a tendril of her hair is like lightly brushing against the nape of her neck. I've got it. I've got it. It's going to be okay. You're all right. It's there. I can feel it. I know it's there. Hold my hand. Hold my hand. This is going to be okay, Miss Adela. We're here. We've got... What are you thinking, babe?

No, no, you're fine. Okay, cool. I think I'll be alright then. Is anyone there? Yep, I'm here. Are any spooky villains around? It's just maybe the nature of Druskinval where the heroes would save Fulcense from a certain point of view.

Once again, the wind picks up and you smell that fetid scent of the rotting sea assail your nostrils one more time. Adela clutches at her face and tries to hold in her gag and it takes a moment, but she is able to calm herself down as the wind passes and the scent returns back to the floral scent of the gardens. Using your help, Lethika, Adela gets to her feet and...

We're not that far now. It's just two more turns and the exit to the maze. And I think on the way back, we just scoot around the edges of the house. Probably, I think. There might even be a side servant's entrance or something. We could take it. I think that would be better. I don't want to have these spiders and everything. Oh, I know what this is. Yeah? Oh, we'll probably ruin a surprise.

I bet she's making a haunted maze for the masquerade tomorrow. I'm... That's exactly right, Briggsie! The paid actors aren't here yet, but for the patrons and the guests of the masquerade, they're gonna walk through here and then someone's gonna jump out with a chainsaw and with a big spooky mask and... I would actually love a haunted maze sans spinus.

Everything else would totally be fine. But I cannot handle spiders. They're creepy and crawly. I get that. I can't. We're going to make sure that there's nothing wrong with the barrows. We're going to take a quick look. We'll just look down there, and then we'll head right back in. All right. And everything's going to be fine. We'll all just snugly... It's just around this corner, and oh my gosh. This is a statue I haven't seen before. What?

and you see what appears to be another statue of a hydra, and it is right next to the entrance that leads out to the moors. And on this one, the hydra looks completely like the other one had, just as large with all of the heads.

curled and twisted at different angles. But the main head, one that is just a little bit larger than the others, in this strange neon paint, you see that the face on this Hydra has been painted over where there had been what had looked like a snarling scowl. There is now a crooked smile. Paint, this neon paint,

pink, almost purple paint drips down the face of the stone in this strange fashion. It looks, it's supposed to be a smile, but it almost looks horrifying. And in the light, the vibrancy of this paint looks almost like it glows. That's strange.

It almost looks like it's been vandalized. Yeah. Would anyone do that, Rod? Not anybody that I know. Who would have possibly been in the gardens? Everyone was at my party. Everybody was in the house.

- You love avant-garde, wouldn't you say? - Yeah. - I'm gonna see if I can like touch the paint with my finger. - It's very high up, but I will say you can climb up. I won't even make you make a check for it. And the paint still hasn't fully dried and you smear it and you see that your finger is now tinged with this paint. - Be careful, Jericho. - Of course, that's mighty beautiful. It's a little avant-garde, I'd say, but it's quite, it's just as shocking.

It's exactly like Briggsie said. It's just decoration for a haunted masquerade. Perhaps that's the theme this year. It is well executed. Yeah, I'll ask Phil about it when he gets home. She reaches up to the earring that she's called him with and she twirls her wedding band, which you know she's also called him with. And you can see that she hesitates. No, I can't. Not when he's...

Not when he's busy. It's fine, it's fine. Nothing's happened, everything's fine. If the barrows are right ahead, let's proceed. We'll take a look, and then we can circumvent this entire maze on our way back. Oh, right. And she quickly picks up pace, walking very quickly as she makes her way around the statue, sidling herself around it, not even touching it, as she spills out on the other side of this...

is this hedge mage maze and looks down over the sprawling moors ahead. You can see the curved hills of a, what appeared to be miles worth of barrows, these, um, hill like, um, grave sites.

where you know that Philip's warriors, Philip's army resides. And actually very close by, maybe not a hundred feet down the hill, you see what is very clearly the largest of these barrows. It's door facing directly the entrance to this maze. And everything looks fine. The only thing that seems strange is...

You can see that wall of mist on the very edge of Druskin Vault, and the color is not quite what you had remembered it being. But as you look around further, you realize that the mist on the opposite side, even towards Fullsense, seems to look normal. There's just something slightly off about the mist swirling around the barrows. You begin to notice the mist crawl and creep across the ground,

tendrils of it dip down into one barrow and two or three. A large swath of mist begins to crawl along the ground heading directly towards the largest of the barrows. Everything looks all right to me. Uh-uh.

It's misty, it's moory, it's barrowy, and it's quiet. See, nothing to be concerned about. Just a normal spooky day on the moors. We're in a spooky kind of place. Just these things happen, I presume. I mean, you know, you've been here longer than I have. Yeah, it's nothing to worry about. Hey, did you see that? That light in...

and the barrow up ahead. And as you look, there's a strange flickering orange light just hovering inside the entrance to the barrow, almost held aloft by mist. It flickers this way and that. It's almost as if it's doing a dance, almost as if it's beckoning you, like a finger calling you forward. And just as quickly as you notice it,

It dips deep into the barrow itself and is consumed by the darkness within. Was that someone with a lantern? Yeah, what else could it have been? Hey, Philly, is that you? Hey, Philly, is that you? Your voice echoes off of the moors back at you. Jorgrim? Jorgrim? Is that? Are you back, Jorgrim? Are you back, Jorgrim? Are you alive? Are you alive? Maybe it's Jorgrim.

He was in the graves. He was really in the graves. You think it's possible that Jörgrim's... that he survived? I... No. Maybe he came back as a ghost. If it was Jörgrim, he would not be hiding himself. It may be a lantern. I mean, there's a lot of mist. I mean, he... he was... he was the... the valiant warrior of the maiden in the mist. Like, maybe she let him free. Maybe she let him go.

Do you think? Well, I mean, we know that after he died, he was able to take some sort of form. I'm not going to get my hopes up. Neither am I.

Maybe the mist deemed him a good spirit and he returned and had experienced resurrection of the flesh. And he's coming to scope out the barrows because that's what he does. He's a grave digger. And he's got a lot of graves to dig. It might be your room. Adela, have you ever been to the barrows? Have you ever been down into any of them, specifically that one? Yeah, that's where the four horsemen reside. That's the best barrow of them all.

Something isn't right. It's the biggest and most ancient of them, and I've been in there many times with Phil when he's... You know, there's normal upkeep and... And it's important that they're all well held together. You know, the bones and stuff. Are the horsemen down there now? No, they should be sleeping. What happens if someone who isn't supposed to be there walks in? I don't know, actually. I don't think we've ever had to deal with it before. I don't like this. I don't like this one bit.

I feel like if there was some kind of villain, they would have attacked us by now. Are the birds still above us? Yeah, they're still circling overhead. You still occasionally hear that same howl from the giant wolf echo across the moors, the strange melancholy tune in a minor key wafts in on the wind, and every once in a while you still smell that putrid scent. Your shadows occasionally act out of character and then shrink back.

If there really was a villain afoot, then I certainly wouldn't expect me to speak! And I... I pull my trim hat out of my belt, and I shoot at the one of the vultures flying in the sky. Roll to attack.

It's a vulture, I never decreed it was mine. You hear the sound of the gun crack out in the night air. You hear it echo, blast, blast, blast, blast on the wind. 22. As you take aim and effortlessly hit one of the vultures above, the bird...

Immediately, its wings crumple and it propels downward, slamming into the statue of the Hydra. He watches the entire statue is splattered in blood, feathers, viscera, as the lifeless bird hangs around the neck of one of the Hydra heads. What the hell was that, Briggsie? Briggsie. See? Just a regular bird. Briggsie.

I'm gonna walk up to it and grab it. What's left of its body. Riggsie! It's up high on the statue. My left hand is gonna detach from my wrist and float up there and grab it and pull, come back down.

And you have a very warm, very dead vulture in your hand. Does it feel like a regular vulture? Yeah, it does. See? Briggsie, I demand you put that down this instant. Oh, I mean... George, Virgil always hated vultures. He says nothing good can come of a vulture. It's not the first time I've killed a vulture. Being rotten-carrying and all, they sort of follow me sometimes. All right. I wish Virgil was here.

Look, whatever we're deciding to do, I don't think it's wise that any of us get close to that barrow, regardless of who may have entered. This is Philip's domain. Philip will know, must know, the comings and goings of the people who are or are not supposed to be in the barrows. We certainly are not taking a dollar on that.

But what if Philip is too busy on account of all of the politics and all the business he has to do? What if he's unawares? What if it is your grim and he has business and he needs his dearest chums? I do not think that possibility is likely. But it's not impossible, no? The safest choice in my mind is for us to return. However, if...

Our chateaus are behaving, to your eyes, the way that they are behaving to mine. There may be a plot here, a scheme. Something that endangers the chateau, or Philip, or Adela. I think it may be worth investigating. I'll concede that it's not impossible, you're correct. Regardless, I do not like this and something is wrong. I agree. But I do not think that leaving it alone is what Philip would want us to do.

We should keep Adela safe, but we must find out why this area has soured. I shouldn't have told Virgil to buzz off. Now we're paying for it. He'd know what to do. Yeah. I'm a bad friend. You are a good friend. Yogi, if that's you, say... Anything at all. If you yelled the echo once a day. Do you see that? The echo? No.

That sounded exactly like him! It sounded like you were doing an impression of him, and it was just the echo off the Abarris. My impression was perfect, I must admit. It was pretty good, but it sounded exactly like him! Not enough to be confused. But what if that was him? It was not him, it was you. I am so convinced. While this is happening, I would like to just kind of do a check. We've seen the vulture.

We've seen the spooky stuff. I want to just make sure that our immediate perimeter, that there's nothing else, the paint is dripping down this thing, right? The statue above us, the Hydra. I want to just do a quick perimeter to make sure nothing's sneaking up on us, that nothing is... Roll a perception check. While he's checking, I'm going to turn to you, to Bracey, and say, watch, I'll prove it. Booger!

Boom! Boom! I didn't say anything like it. It was basically exactly like what he said it was like. No, 23. You do a quick perimeter check, and outside of the vultures circling ahead, it does not seem like anything's creeping ever closer. Try this one on the side. No! Anya! How can you betray me? No!

The hitter comes back. Briggsie, I almost wish you were a same-boogo. I've got another one for you. Just to prove further that it's just there. Oh, if the citizens just lined up in a single line five feet wide, we could take the entire town of Volsatsch.

At two, Marius. At two. Oh, if the town would just light up. We could take the town at full sun. See, Adela, that's remarkable. No, no, that was the echo. The echo sounds exactly like what we're doing. It's not him. It's not your room. It's us. I'm going to disagree. That's fine. That's fine. Just my impressions a bit. That's all I'm going to say. One of us needs to go. And it can't be me because I look like Adela. No, we can't split up. If you're going to have to go with you...

I think whatever you're doing, you should keep doing it. If harm were to come to her, a distraction would be wise. If anything... A decoy, if you will. In fact, I think that you should do your best to hide. Make as little noise as possible as we approach the barrow. Yeah, I'll just be there with you in case any of them wake up, because with Phil not being here, I'm the only one that can control them.

Well, you can jump into action should the need arise, but in case there is danger, we want me to be seen first. Yes. As you. All right. Just steal, and I will touch her shoulder, and I will give her advantage on stealth checks. Oh. Thank you. All right, I'm going to...

wear this very, very bright white dress down into a completely moonlit drenched moor and hope that I am very stealthy in doing so. Well, all right. That sounds good and stealthy. All right. Sir Darius. We can take care of that. Very funny. So, so we're... Yes, Sir Darius is heavily armored. Briggs is heavily armed.

We've got spells. Why did you just say "chook-chook" when you moved your hand over your gun like that? Oh, I saw it in a major image once. We're gonna make sure, quick, quicken it out. I'm sure it's fine. It's gonna be fine. Honestly, it could've just been a lightning bug or something. A really, really big lightning bug. Exactly right, or a June bug. Sure, do they have lights on 'em?

Well, no, but sometimes they really stink. They do, though, don't they? Maybe that's the scent that we're smelling. So we'll go down. It'll be fine. It's probably all part of the decoration for the best drink of. I'm sure it is. That's nothing to worry about. If you wouldn't mind leading the way down. Stay close, and let's move quickly. All right. The moment that we see any real danger, we must get you to safety, first and foremost. Yes. When we discover the source of the light, regardless of what it is...

We're not sticking around longer than we need to. Understood? - All right. - If you say so, but y'all should really watch "Bad Boys 2" if you haven't seen it yet. - Vincy, what the fuck are you talking about? - Vincy, what the fuck are you talking about? - Follow me. - I've only seen the first one. - Sword drawn, I begin to move down the moors towards this first barrow. - You do, you make your way very hastily, but stealthily. Everyone roll a stealth check for me, please.

I'm disadvantaged. Stealth A. Oh, sweet Jesus. Oh, sweet Jesus. I'm not stealthy at all. Why didn't we use any of our twists, you idiot? Nine. You have so many. I would have gotten an eight with a max twist. It would have been nothing. 25. Garbage. Nine. I'm disadvantaged!

I'm feeling very Adela. With a bright white dress on, I'm looking at an 11. Perfect. Yeah, Adela rolled a six and a three. Nice. None of you are very stealthy at all.

But it doesn't seem to matter because the-- - I tripped! - Oh, I thought you said you got a five. - No, I tripped. - The illusion dress. - It doesn't seem to matter that you're not stealthy because the barrows and the moors seem to be completely empty. You occasionally glance back at Chateau Claire de Lune and you see so many rooms filled with light.

You know that the heads of the provinces are here for the masquerade and that they have their own individual houses on the opposite sides of the moors, but that there are tons of people staying at Chateau Claire de Lune right now for the masquerade. People coming in from the province

from all of these provinces, not just the lords and ladies, but other peoples of nobility that will be there. And the lights that shine in Chateau Cler de Lune are quite beautiful. And it gives you a little semblance of peace as you make your way through the moors. The mist, the strange, almost darkened mist undulates around your feet, swirls around you occasionally, dancing with your shadows as you make your way down to this barrow.

Still, the same howl can be heard carried along the winds. The putrid stink of rotting fish occasionally assails your nostrils. Very faintly, you can hear that organ continue to play off in the distance.

All of these things do not abate as you make your way towards the barrow and eventually you find yourself standing at the entrance towards it, the large stone entrance. These what look like little pebbles that have been stacked together to create an arched doorway directly into this small pocket of earth that's completely grown over with grass on the top.

you see that the pathway leads just a little bit down and deep into this place and it is pitch dark. - Standing at the entrance of the sparrow, I look over my shoulder to my friends and I say, "If that was a person with a lantern, "thank goodness they didn't ask who goes there. "There could have been women around." Are you ready? - Ready. - Sir Marius, that was very funny. I give you park inspiration. - Thank you. - What is D8?

Yeah, you must be at an eight. You make your way into the Barrow and immediately you feel cold overwhelm you. This is built into the very earth itself and it is almost like a natural refrigeration system in the way that it keeps the air here so cool.

You can see your breath come out in puffs of smoke as you, or frost as you make your way deeper into the sparrow. You realize as you begin walking, are you using any light source? - If there wasn't any light, I would throw some pumpkins in there. - Throw some pumpkins? - Well, I got lanterns of my own, pumpkins!

Blankets! Four Phoenix Jack-o'-lanterns will emerge. And they do, and as they do, you realize that there are skulls embedded in the length of the walls of this place, almost like a catacombs, as you make your way down this long tunnel, and you see very faintly, far off in the distance,

that strange orange undulating light dancing. Well, hopefully they have not noticed us despite our creation of light. Who goes there? Who goes there? Your voice echoes back at you.

Jorgrim, is that you? Jorgrim, is that you? Your voice echoes back. General, get a hold of yourself. I think it's Jorgrim. It looks like a lantern. You're embarrassing yourself. Let's go. We hurry. We rush forward. You make your way further in and the...

The walls that are built up in this thing are almost circular as you make your way through. And every time you feel like you're getting closer to this light, it seems to move further and further away as you make your way through this circular pathway until eventually, and all of these walls lined with bones and skulls, and eventually you spill out into what is a large inner cavern.

and your lights immediately snuff out, Jericho. As darkness consumes all of you, the temperature drops just a little bit more.

The sound of the music off of the moors is completely gone now. That putrid smell you can no longer smell. Your shadows can't be seen in the darkness, so what they do and whether they choose to act correctly is completely unknown to you. Because all of a sudden, not one, but two orange lights erupt in the very center of this room on the floor. And you immediately hear what sounds to be, or what...

to be the sound of horse hooves, giant horse hooves running in circles around this barrow outside. You hear the neighing of let's do

I'd like you all to roll a history check. The neighing of history? The neighing of, and I want a history check. The neighing of history. I'm adding three twists. As Benjamin Franklin wants it. I'm not adding anything. I got five. The neighing of history. I only know one type of horse, and this is not it. I think that sounds like a geese. 20. 20.

Everyone else? I got a five. A two. It does sound like a goose to me. Brigsy and Jericho, you immediately can hear the sound of this horse, and you know what it is right away. This ungodly, unholy abomination of the nightmare as it neighs out, the sound of it echoing throughout the moors, and then a soft,

But...

confident feminine laughter as all of a sudden those two lights erupt and you see what is very clearly a giant jack-o'-lantern in the very center of this room. The two lights dancing inside of the pumpkin's gourd-like form and the face on it is carved in a malicious sneer and clearly painted with that same similar pink paint.

You look down at it, and the light shows that your shadows are dancing behind you, strangely moving this way and that. You occasionally, you look towards Jericho, and you see his shadow is moving in to choke Lethika as Lethika's shadow is moving towards Briggsie with a strange bottle attempting to pour it down his throat as all of your shadows attempt to attack and...

and harm each other. You see the mist has begun to fill up this space, that strange, horrifying mist. The smell is getting stronger, it had been gone, but now it's completely filled this space as that melancholy tune begins to play and then the entire barrows begin to shake. You watch as the skulls begin to tumble down from the walls

as you see one skeletal hand pop up out of the earth, and then another as the dead begin to rise, but they don't look like,

they did when they were charging down at the crooked house. Their complete forms are infused with this strange, corrupted mist. As they begin to burst forth from the ground, you then notice that coming from that spiral entranceway that you took, more of them are encroaching upon you as a veritable horde of wights bear down on you. And that is where we'll end the session. Dammit! Ah! Ah!

Maybe they're friendly! The night is dark and full of terrors. Whoosh! Thanks for running the session, Diggie. You're welcome. What an awesome cliffhanger. I'm very excited. Wow. We, uh...

Okay, all right. We're back. It's Edge of Midnight. We're back, baby. They're friendly whites. Are you sure we can't fight them? I mean, do you want to fight them? Do you want to stay up until midnight? We can do it. I say fuck it. We can do it. We'll save that. We'll save that. I want to. I want to.

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