Beneath Dark Wings | Ep. 10 | The Sound of Thunder: Part 1
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Welcome to Legends of Avantris. I'm Capriccio DeSesto. You can call me Caprice and you're listening to Beneath Dark Wings. Here's what happened last time. It was very surprising that Moloch had been allied allegedly with Baphomet. What do we do going from here?

We saw them march in the exact opposite direction away from the city. We know the city is no longer, at least for now, in need of our help. We took care of Moloch! We took care of him. He's done now. We're probably gonna do it anyway. So the stars aligned in this case. Everything's fine. Everything's good. The High General wants to see you. You've all made it. How are you all feeling?

A ghost of a chance, I suppose, is better than no chance at all. Make peace and vacate my throne room immediately. I'm busy. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Bali looks at you. You see that he has his pack fully packed. It's slung over the side of one of the chairs. And he says,

You see, however, there's a few marks across his face and actually down his neck is a pretty bad burn mark. Thank the gods you're alive. We've learned a lot and we've learned that despite the, you may have seen that the army's going north, going south is actually the best way that we can lend our services to keep the world safe.

At one point when you're all in your room, you hear the flapping of wings and at the window is Xurn's six-eyed raven and it croaks. Let's introduce our players and our characters very briefly and then we'll talk about what we did in the break. Why don't we start with Capricci? Hi, my name is Derek. I'm going to be playing Caprice or Capriccio de Sesto. Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm a tiefling lore bard.

And I have many one-liners and songs that I break out during the session, which we'll see if they land, you never know. And I'm here in the continent of Striga looking for who knows what. I don't know.

Stuff? Something. Something? What did I do with my downtime? Well, I forgot to email Mikey the extensive list of things that I wanted to do. So let's just say that after visiting Xur and the top of the tower, I will say that he had that really sweet battle map table.

and on top of which all of these really beautiful artisan crafted tokens of sorts to represent the different armies and everything. I was fascinated by those and I spent most of the week looking for the shop, the craftsman who actually crafted that, and I bought a whole ton of these minis, let's call them. And I'm just really loving them, that's all. You are one clever motherfucker. Okay, all right, sorry, sorry.

I'm gaining my composure. My name is Andy. Today I will be playing a human evocation wizard named Felix Ackerman, born and raised in Striga, Corvacchia, and ex-military member. After helping the city of Zentra with the impending invasion, I was pardoned by General Zurn himself.

to now freely move about and not have to worry about getting captured and murdered. And I spent my entire week in the restricted section of the Zentra library. My entire week. If it hadn't been for the librarians and some general and some random military people, I would have starved to death. And that was my week.

Hey, I'm Richie and I'm playing Toa Kamenui, who is a goliath barbarian of the ancestral Gadean variety. He's from an islander tribe of goliaths and he's in Striga to hopefully find the wind spirits that used to protect his island and that went missing.

And during the week, I went around town. And if you weren't using the ring, I would have taken the ring of Disguise Self and transformed into Bert, who's a human that's still like six and a half feet tall with big mutton chops. And I would have looked for the other Goliath that I've been kind of tailing this whole time because I think he's going to fuck everything up.

So I would have just been kind of going from district to district, trying to ask people as a human, so that I'm not kind of giving away the fact that there's this goliath running around. Just trying to find, kind of get word of Makutu, I believe is his name, and looking for him.

Hello, I am Maya and I play Hirzai Amvoharq. She is a Healed Ward Oath of Devotion Paladin of Muradin. She hails from the Grizzelpaw Mountains in Yonah and she's on a quest to find her dad who is a Forge Cleric of Muradin. He went on a journey to deliver some magical items to the city of Galtika. Hadn't heard from him in a week and so now she's marching into Struga. She heard he might have

He might have marched there. So she's following him and she's really really missing him and so is Ma. So for her week of downtime, she probably would have helped rebuild any of the parts of the city that were destroyed during the incursion and probably spent most of her time in the blacksmith shop helping repair weapons and armor and whatnot. Just doing her duty.

She introduced her musk ox, Steve Payton, and so she probably summoned her at every opportunity that she could and that kept her company. - That's nice. - Yeah, that's nice. Cool. I'm Kelsey. I play Lufty. She is an Air Genasi monk and I've been traveling along with Iris, kind of keeping an eye on her at request of Daddy, who I love.

Homeboy. Homeboy. So I think during my week, I would probably be bouncing around from group to group of military men, just trying to correct their general senses. Oh yeah, that's what you're doing. Playing games, singing, drinking, trying to get them to like loosen up a little. I bet. You know what I mean.

Iris. I'm Nikki. I'm going to be playing Iris. I am a Tabaxi cleric of the grave, a worshiper of the only god that matters, Anubis. And I would have been spending my time, I would have found the local pool, and I would have been spending my time at the pool, praying, swimming, sunbathing, and pretending like we hadn't just been attacked because there's a pool here.

I love that, but I always pictured like Cork Vodka like Seattle where it rains like 360 to 365 days. That literally does not matter.

I'm also probably wrong. So Iris would be laying there, the sun would be out, she'd be enjoying it, the rain would come out, you'd see her pull a little and she'd continue to read. And then once the sun was out, she'd start sunbathing again. I'm imagining all of this really harsh gothic architecture and all these big dark citadels and all of a sudden there's a public pool with cracked concrete and a dirty chain link fence in the middle of all of this. And I've been like,

cleaning it up and putting some of my gold trinkets around so I look beautiful. That's fantastic. There's probably nobody else there. As soon as I found out there was a pool, I'd be there in my trunks and I would just jump into the air, polymorph into a killer whale and just, wham! Shockwave the, yeah, you know. Yeah, no, that would happen. I have my little, like, sunscreen up in front of me so you see the water crest over it.

Then I go back to what I'm doing. Okay. I have a new mental image of what you look like right after you get out of the pool, too. When you have your hair back, just straight down. Okay. So, I'm Mikey. I'm the Ironing Board DM. They call me that, or I call myself that at the very least, because I literally DM on an ironing board. I like to roll dice, write fan fiction, and do silly voices. So, Caprice, it takes you a long time to find this craftsperson.

And you manage to find this woodworking shop. And they have a large... It's a woodworking and blacksmith shop conjoined. They have a big foundry in the back. It was actually made by warlocks that use kind of eldritch magic in order to really enhance their craftsmanship. Oh, wow. That's really clever. I see what you're doing there. I hate you guys, but I love you some things. I would say, Felix, you...

spend a lot of time reading in the library and you basically under, you finally figure out the cadence of what you were looking for. The advancement of arcane magic, basically burying tiers of spells leading to, uh,

particularly focusing on the connections between the planes. This would basically be the various kind of magic that Orpheus was kind of studying very heavily in our Prime campaign. - Amen. - And that takes a good portion of your time. In addition, you were able to, it was very difficult to decipher, but you learned a bit about Baphomet and Moloch. Moloch, there isn't a whole lot

But you know that they believe that at one point in time he was worshipped as one of the archdevils of Ba Torp of the Abyss. And at some point he was deposed. And there have been various mentions of cults of Moloch throughout history attempting to reclaim power. And they've seemingly all failed. And Baphomet, you know, you learn is a demon lord of the Abyss.

that is worshiped by many evil minotaurs. And his, at least what you believe is, what is written down, his primary hatred is civilization. And he wants to bring an end to civilization and an ideal world is where all humanoids, all beasts, all demons are just savage, bloodthirsty brutes that hunt and kill for sport. And that's Baphomet? Baphomet. Oh, Baphomet believes that, not Mawlock? Yes. Yep.

Molok, you believe that there is a very heavy connection to child sacrifice. Okay. That the cults... So that's the distinction. That's why it's important that you donate today. Wow! Wow! Oh, darn! Exclamation point charity. Exclamation point charity, everyone. Ladies and gentlemen. Did Beatrice come back? Yes, Beatrice does come back. Yay! And as she flew south, she saw...

As it was south, she flew and she didn't see anything in regards to human trafficking, but she did notice that various towns that were basically surrounding the Clockwood were hard at work being evacuated. Any potential town or small village was being heavily evacuated if there was any threat that the swath of the marching path of the Horned Legion was going to attack or be even close to them.

Thank you. Okay. Toa, you ask around and you... Most people don't know what you're talking about. However, you actually do manage to find some individual that seems to have met a person that resembles who you're looking for. And the person was actually the owner of a bookshop.

And there was a hooded Goliath that eventually the hood fell off to show these dark red tattoos. And this individual was looking for an Auryn translation guide. Ooh. And I'll leave it there. Can I try to find a similar book that he was looking for? I would try to copy exactly what he did. I would say you'd be able to find one. Yeah. Got it.

- Hersha, you are able to, you have to spend your whole time basically repairing the wall, but with your assistance, the wall is repaired a lot faster. And you're generally used to assisting with blacksmithing, so you're generally focusing on things like metal supports and the like, but you try your hand at stone masonry and the like, and you get a little bit better at it, but it's still not your forte.

Uh, Lufty, you make some, uh, good friends. Um, and... Yeah, I do. You find yourself, uh,

Basically getting the ins and outs of all of the gossip of who's sleeping with whom, who's cheating on whom. And actually there's a lot more sex and lasciviousness in the military than you would have guessed from the military folks in Zentra. Obviously the closer that it gets into the Citadel, the less you're able to penetrate. But...

You make a few friends. See what you did there. Iris, you spend a bit looking for the perfect spot. Eventually, you find a luxury gated community in Skyreach. Yes! Yes! With a... I've found my people. A luxurious...

that has an enormous pool, a spa. There's literally a swim-up bar service. Oh, baby. God, that sounds good. By the time you all reconvene, you are far and away the most rested. Do we have to play D&D? Let's just go do, like... We're going to do an eight-hour live session of us at the pool.

Finally produced sashimi from Inari. They imported a chef from Inari and it's just absolutely delightful. And it's very difficult to leave. I don't. We lose Iris completely. So, this is goodbye everyone. Good luck. I hope you enjoy being underneath all of those birds. So, you are all in your room.

And on your windowsill, you all wake up after a time. And on your windowsill, you see the flapping of black feathers and you see the huge six-eyed raven perch. And it lets out a croak. And it looks at all of you, one eye on each of you, and then flaps away. What does it sound like, Garrett, when it flaps away? Okay.

So, you've been summoned by Zurm into his quarters, whenever you care to go. Did it leave one of its little fecals on the window sill? What's a fecal? She means shit. Oh, oh, I know what that is. Wait, so fecal's the same as shit? Oh, look at the window sill. Is there any shit there? There isn't any fecal. Thank God that Zurm trains his pets where to go.

I always kind of assumed it's sort of like Beatrice where it's not really a bird per se, it's more of like a representation of a bird. Does Beatrice not use the bathroom? No! Sorry, I've been down- I haven't really spoken in like three days. Sorry, no, no Beatrice, no she, no she just, she doesn't, she's not really a real bird, she's magically created. No.

She just exists. You have like a patchy beard. Yeah, it's very, it's like, it's almost like kind of growing and like clear and wispy and like not, you know, it's definitely not a real beard. Like you wouldn't look at it and go, that's a beard. You'd go, what happened to your face?

Alright. Felix! What happened to your face? Look, I slept in the Citadel. I forgot to eat a few times. I got a lot of really good work done, though. I feel a lot better about it. I just got a shave. It's been a while. Are you sure? I mean, I could spend like a minute casting Mending on your face and wait for you to come out. I... It...

Okay. Oh, so that's how- I don't know if this works. I'm gonna try to cast Mending on his face to make his beard go away. What would the DM judge on that one? I would say Mending doesn't work for like organic. Ugh, that's too bad. I'm gonna be honest, I didn't really know what was gonna happen. I'll put it in my notes. Just be glad I didn't accidentally cast Thunder Wave. Peyton doesn't take daps either.

Oh, really? She's also magically salmon. So no magical poop, then? That's interesting, because she smells like she does nothing but take douches. That's probably me. Yes, it probably is. Um, no, so what was it? You were obviously sleeping in the library. What did everyone else do during the week? I feel very refreshed.

I found this book of Orin translations. What was it? A translation guide to the elemental... I know what Orin is, right? The language spoken in the elemental plane of air. Because the dick that I'm following... The what? I knew you'd get it. The dick...

I'm sorry, what? The mean guy! I heard duck. I heard dick. That's what I'm saying, a duck. You're following a duck. No, no, that's a duck. That's what I thought she said. So you did say dick like a phallic object. Can you write it down? Like a penis. Yes, yes, kind of like a penis, but not really a penis, more just like a big guy. Like an asshole. Like a real villain. Oh, like a cock salad.

Toa, please continue writing. I'll write that one down. Well, anyway, I'm just... He... I didn't see him, I didn't find him, but I got word that he was looking for books on Oren and that fucking dick. He was... He was... He keeps imagining a very wooden dick. He's trying to read the same thing that I am. So I bought a book and I'm going to start reading it. I just have a question. You mentioned that that particular language is a language of air elementals. Yeah.

Does that fall under primordial? Yes, it is a dialect of primordial. So if you know primordial, can you speak it? Yes. Okay. Well, I think it will do you well to learn a new language. Good for you. I don't think I can learn a new language. It seems very, very difficult. So then what are you trying... Does it have pictures? I haven't seen any yet, but I haven't gotten through every page. I'm just hoping to just figure out why he would want...

Did you doodle a little home in your notebook? Oh, this? Oh, yeah, this is just, these are my sketches. Oh, that's nice. Those are beautiful drawings, Tori. Did that author a severed hand? Caprice! It's a severed hand. Oh, I thought it was a horse. LAUGHTER

This is my Curse of Strahd. Yeah, these are the things you're sketching during Curse of Strahd. You get attacked by a severed head, and... Toa, I don't know what your goal is with this book, but I can speak Primordial. You can speak Primordial? Yes, I can read the book. This is an entirely different language. This is already not Primordial. Well, from my understanding, which I just learned recently, it's a dialect.

What's a dialect? Well, it's like a subset of a language. Like when two people speak the same language, there are differences in the language where they might not be able to understand each other due to this difference in like a sub-language. So you already know everything in this book? Well, no, but I can read what's in the book and help you if you need any help. Yeah, yeah, if you could read it instead of me, that'd be great.

Sure. Anything for you, Toa. Plops it all on top of like 800 books. How big is the book? Oh, it's just a little translation guide. So like if you're trying to like just hear words and it's like, you know, oh, it's a quick guide to like go to France and you have a little French thing. What does bathroom mean? I'll just like, all right, then I'll just leaf through it and be like, oh, then I'll just explain that and I'll hand it back to him. But if you have any questions about...

You know, that language, I might be able to help you out. So as long as you're around, I don't even need this. If you can understand it, probably not. I'll throw it in the trash. But what happens if we're not together one day?

Oh, you're right! And I'm like, I fish it out of the trash. There's some, like, rotten banana on it. I don't know if you have a life at all. Gross. Jeez, I didn't consider that. I'll just, I'll keep it just in case. I'll take the banana peel and put it in my pocket. All right, then. Did anyone else do anything interesting this past week? Well...

I did go to the gate to help fix that and patch that up. Why? Because there were parts of it that had been broken by those... Oh, I know that, but why would you spend your time fixing other people's problems? Well, this kind of became our problem. No, I think we fixed it. We helped, you know. We also kind of made it worse, but...

True. Yeah, but then she may be better again. So we'll even see then. Minus the whole, you know, bathmat situation. Oh, that's like so last week. Technically you're correct. That's literally true. That's very last week. I just don't understand why this big deal about a bathmat. You guys keep talking about how bad this thing is. This is really like, what is the problem with this bathmat?

You understand we're saying bath-a-met. Yeah, no, I'm just fucking with you. Okay. Wait, what's a bath-met? That's a mat you put in the bath. You put in the bath? Yeah, so if you're coming out of the tub, you don't slide around like I do when I get all greasy and stuff before I get in and out of the tub.

Do you grease in the tub or do you get greasy before you get into the tub? Have you looked at her? I have a lot of questions. So you put it in the bath but then you use it when you get out of the bath? Yeah, mine has little suction cups on the bottom so I put mine in the bathtub and then I go and then I take it out and put it outside of the bathtub and then I step on it. And then you go I was going to ask what is the reverse of

Enlightening. Anyway, we were summoned, and we should probably get there very, very quickly. Yeah, yes, I agree, I agree. When we're all ready, we should get to... I'm honestly not in much of a hurry to be summoned. I've quite enjoyed the last week. Yeah, you really got that tan going. Yeah. Oh, you could tell? Sure. I've only eaten ice for the entire week. I feel very...

Can I suck in my face? You can tell, can't you? Absolutely, yeah. 100%. With a plus 12 deception. Plus 9. I knew it. I went by and I had my fur trimmed, my nails done.

Well, I'd be comfortable going to Zurin unless we have another place to go. I mean, spa is not a bad idea, but he may be wanting to see us with some urgency. Oh, I was not inviting you to the spa. It was incredibly relaxing because you were all not there at the time. I don't need an invitation to go to the spa. You don't remember that time? No, I do. I do. I do, Caprice. Yes. Yes, I do. I remember.

I go under the bed and I drag out everybody's weapons and I hand them all back to them. I polished these out for you and wiped them down and reattached the leathers. I hope you like it. Oh, thanks. I love it when you polish things off. I'm gonna flip my spoon around and like, it's wooden, but I'm gonna pretend I can see my reflection. I think I understand why she helped out with the wall. I thought she were a member of our group.

But you're our servant. Well, no, but I am serving in some places. Thank you! This is very, this is so nice! That was very generous of you. The paint really pops now. Now, um, if you do happen upon any jello salad, that'll be a good form of payment. Um, well, we're going back to the Citadel, where we know that they serve jello salad, so perhaps you can ask for some?

I'm sure there are lots of other jello form factors that we can discover. Are you going to puke? I'm alright, I'm alright. Constitution saving throw. Is it the word jello or the salad itself that bothers you? Andy's the best at baiting me into making him roll for stuff. I pride myself on it. 20 total. Oh yeah, you don't puke at all.

I know, I'm so hungry too! Is it the word jello or the idea of the jello salad itself that makes you... All of it. All of it. I think he has a phobia of giblet. Then he should not spend time with her, Jacques.

Oh, it's always related to Hesia! I think you're right, I think it may be all the jiggling. Are you allergic to dwarves? No, no, no. Is it my dander? No, no, no, you're lovely. We should be getting to the high channel. Okay. Then let's go. Let's go. Yes, we should go right away. He pukes at least to the outside of the house. You walk through the...

through the wide halls of the Citadel as they narrow and narrow as you get higher and higher. The cacophony of the croaking ravens outside of each and every window as you get higher gets louder and louder. I'm going to be like pointing. Hi, Citadel.

- And you hear like, you have some little, you go go little red, like, hey. - One of them standing next to his wife and he's just like. - No, not now, no! - Oh, I see. - Two of them get into a fight knowing that they know both of you. That you know both of them. - That happens, all that happens.

And eventually you arrive at Xurden's quarters, or rather not his personal quarters, but the command room.

The door is open for you and you see Zurn standing, looking over the table. The beautifully polished wooden figures all over the maps of Striga have all moved since the last time you've seen it. You see now that there are new commissions of bull-headed tokens and tons of them as they are all positioned.

As you approach, you see that the... you look and you see the map of Korovakia and you remember that the Horned Legion had come from the south of Zentra and now it seems as if the pieces are placed almost to the mountain range that separates Korovakia and Grond. The... To the north. The Kingdom of Orcs. To the north.

And as you all enter the room, Zurn looks at you with his one good arm on the table and he gives you a nod and he says, "I trust your week was restful." Oh yeah, great week. Yeah? Sir, I actually got a really good amount of work done and I feel better than I felt in a long time. Me too. I'm pretty sore, but I feel like I helped. Me too.

I tried out the bow you gave me and a few taverns. This thing is magic. It's fantastic. I'm glad to hear that. May you play me a song? Oh, um...

Sure, I'd be happy to. You know, I learned a new song at this shop that I went to. They make these same miniatures on the table here. Are you gonna use the bow he gave you? Absolutely. Oh, that's fantastic. I'll sing the song that I learned from the elders of the Eldritch Foundry, with the great history and lore of their craft passed down for generations.

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Thank you so much. I finished playing the last note real long on the bow. Listen to this thing. It's amazing. Make a performance track. Oh, yeah, happily. At an advantage. At an advantage. Thank you, Vitonics. And also, thank you.

Thank you to Weary Lim. Thank you for the follow-up. 22. Caprice plays this and sings at the same time, and the new bow on his violin does wonders as just the beautiful notes of his playing and his sultry voice just soars over you. It's velvety and delightful.

And it's fantastic. And Zurn closes his eyes as he listens to it and hangs on every note. And it seems as if there was a level of incredible tenseness as he was gritting his teeth when you saw him. And there's a little bit of tension that releases in his face as he listens to this. And he nods and says, I thank you. The...

I don't believe that the lyrics quite matched up to what they do to make these... It's a work of progress! But I appreciate that, thank you. My pleasure. So, I have arranged everything that you will need to journey forth to Eerios. It will be weeks of travel. Are you prepared for that? Yes, sir. And that is just to get to the front line? Yes, sir. General, sir. Of course.

You will be accompanied by General Fuhrman. He's being sent to the line as the Okaxian court has been up to something nefarious. I can sense it. The skies are thundering, and I believe that they mean harm, they mean to attack, if it is related to all of what has been going on, I am not sure. But it will be dangerous. We have found an individual to meet us on the front lines.

who's a member of the resistance against the Okaxian court. They should be able to guide you into their country and take you to where you need to go to investigate the whereabouts of any of the Windukes. - Sir, high general, sir. I hope I'm not out of line, but how large is this resistance? - It is growing in strength, but it is small. We are attempting to assist

to subvert the goals of the court, but there's only so much we can do getting across the lines and out of their purview. Owl's eyes are large and watchful. Even my ravens perish when they attempt to fly over the skies of Erios. - That's horrible. So are you saying that we will be political agents of Korovakia trying to topple a foreign government and help a resistance, but

stay in the shadows so it feels like it's the local resistance toppling them.

Toa, you are far more politically savvy than I realized. Toa, that was shockingly insightful. Oh, well, thank you. I just wanted to make sure I was understanding correctly. I'm impressed. It seems... I think that we can be up to the challenge. In any other orders you have, we will, of course, obey whatever General Furman... He's a general, right? Not a... Whatever General Furman, however he orders us, but I think we're all up for the task.

That is good to hear. So, I have made arrangements for you to leave tomorrow morning at dawn. We long travel, but I don't foresee any problems until you get to the front. Once you leave Korovakia's borders though, no promises. If I need to contact you, I will do what I can to get a raven to you. Is there anything else that you'll need while you are in the city?

I think I'm ready to go whenever we, I'm ready to set out right away. I agree. Yeah. You know, I meant to actually go to a, what's the word? A fletcher, someone who makes arrows. I meant to get some crossbow bolts. Would I be able to get some from like the armory here or is there a nearby shop or something along those lines? We will have them, I'll have the armorer send them to you. Oh, that's great, thanks. I really appreciate that. You should be fully equipped.

Aside from that, I'm good to go. By any chance, Mr. Zurn, did you hear from your ravens if they have spotted my dad? I have not. I have sent some of the trustworthy remnants of the Eye of Secrets that haven't been horribly tortured and executed. And there was talk of a dwarf that looked out of place

Heading north. Exactly where? I do not know. And how far away were they spotted? Was he spotted? Hundreds of miles north of Zentra. What's north of Zentra? I believe the Orcish Kingdom of Grand. Of Nation, perhaps. Are they a nation? What's the difference between a nation and a kingdom? And a republic. And a republic. Nation of United Tribes.

So you would call them a nation? That is what I have been calling them, yes. Does that mean... and that's where all of the horrible beast creatures are headed? Oh no. Yeah, there's either going to be an all-out war or they're going to, you know, ally. And then we've got orcs and beasts and Baphomet and the whole thing all together, all in one big crazy frappe. Well, I trust that General Zurn will take care of things here.

We will continue to make the best military decisions that we can. For now, I think it's most prominent, most pertinent, that these six of you act as undercover agents of Korovakia to disrupt the tyrannical government of Eerios, disrupt the Okaxian court, find the Wind Dukes, and that could save us all from the Chainguard.

What else do you know about this court? Who's on it? How many people? They're tyrannical, so they're pretty bad folk, I guess. But what do you know about them? It is an aristocracy that is constantly changing leaders. When they believe that the current leader has failed, they will hoist another one out. Boring, squabbling houses. It is a court that...

has subjects on the ground on the forest floor where it's very dangerous. And they tax them relentlessly, are very brutal for any signs of dissent. But I am confident you will be able to survive far easier than most that attempt to make their way into Eerios. Thanks. Yeah, it's our pleasure. I mean, we'll do what we can. Maybe before we go, I can send a message to my mom now that I...

Now there may have been a spotting of my dad, not to say that that was the same dwarf, but if he's looking at a place in Striga, it might very well be my pa. I think that's right, yeah, 100%. At the very least, she should know you've been here, and maybe they can get a letter back from her to you. It might take a while, but... I might not be here when she messages me back, but... Letters travel slow. I mean, I haven't heard back from my dad, and I've been writing him for a while now.

I think Generals are not already mentioned where the, like, post, outpost place may be, or whatever kind of post you use. Yeah, I mean, there's a bunch of different mail. There's a mail delivery service. Okay. I'll probably hit up that place before we leave. Well, you have one more night here. Rest up. General Furman will fill you in on the details of your travel. Unless there's anything else, you are all dismissed. Which was his good arm?

His right arm. Okay, so I use the correct arm to try and shake his hand and extend it. If he accepts it, it's been a pleasure. He looks at you and you go to kids and he shakes your hand. Sir, General Zun, sir, thank you for everything. I have nothing left. Thank you. Sir, General Zun, sir, thank you. Same as me. At ease.

And you all eventually leave. And as you're about to leave, he says, this may be the last time we see each other for quite a long time. Good luck and do the best you can for Korvaki and for humanity. We will. Thank you.

He nods. And you all leave. You have one more evening to do what you will, unless you're all in the Citadel. You make your way back either to your quarters or out on the town for one last night. I guess I would see the armorer and however many bolts they might be able to give me. I'd pay for it if I need to. Yeah, as many as you need. And is there a potion shop on the way? I would grab some healing pot.

Yep, that you're able to buy as many healing potions as you like. I don't know what the usual adventurous price is. Just Google "sane prices for magical items." Oh, do that and I'll track some. Thank you. I think for our last night we should go back to the Skyreach District and go to that sandwich shop that Caprice went in that one time. Just for old times' sake. Do we really want to go in there? I mean, uh... Why not? Because... This is the last time we've been to... Frequent customers that I run into might be upset if they saw me again. Oh, you could give him the ring. I could give you the ring?

I can do that myself if we're gonna spend less than an hour there. I was just thinking it'd be a nice place to have dinner for the last night. I'd be happy to do it. Let's go. I'm excited about the plan. Let's do it. I want to take a detour to the post office. Send a message to my mom. Okay. So, you all make your way through the city and you...

Stop at the post office. You manage to send a letter out, and they receive it. It will cost two copper pieces in order to send the letter. Cool. And you eventually make your way to the sandwich shop. Caprice, you disguise yourself, and...

And as you're leaving, you see the portly gentleman with the bulbous red nose as he's leaving with his favorite sandwich. And he's still kind of walking with the look of horror in his eyes. And you can see that there are remnants of wounds and deep, dark bruises as if he had been beaten pretty horribly. Oh. And...

He's just kind of shambling past you slowly. I look like John Madden. I've hurt my gaze. You all eat and you enjoy a last meal before you leave. And unless you guys want to talk about anything, you guys get a long rest and enjoy the next morning.

Okay. All right. I think what I'm going to do, and I'll figure it out, I'm going to put some spell into my ring. Okay. Which is not a ring, but a bookmark. That's right. I'll figure it out. I just want to let you know that I'll have it. I would say you have had seven days. You can easily fill it with whatever that you would care to fill it with. So, you awake the next morning feeling very refreshed. You are in party packed the night before, and you...

there is a group of soldiers waiting for you. They escort you down the Citadel as you eventually arrive to the Eastern Gate of the Citadel. And waiting for you is a group of soldiers that has a procession of several carriages and a very, very, very heavily armed group

protection unit of soldiers on either side and you are escorted into these carriages and as the heavy metal gate rattles open you hear the you feel the jolts of the carriages taking off as the grinding of the wooden wheels as you begin to make your way through the city these are made of dark wood not particularly comfortable

but they seem to be military grade carriages as you make your way through the city and eventually you make your way to the final gate and you see a gentleman standing there that you've seen once before. It's a gentleman, seems to be older, about the same age as Zurn, of dark hair, thick black mustache with an eyepatch.

and he stands with a group of soldiers behind him as the soldiers in the carriage say, "That's General Furman. He'll want to speak with you before we head out." And the carriages stop and open up for you as General Furman stands tall, awaiting you to approach him. Hey, what's up, buddy?

Sir, General Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-Firm-F

Any additional animals and beasts, you'll be responsible for feeding and your upkeep. But there will be no time for dallying in our trip. We are crossing halfway across the country. What about dillying? That neither. Okay.

What's the difference between dillying and dallying? Well, really, it's just a turn of phrase, and they mean the same thing. It means to waste time or act in a lollygagging manner. All right, okay. I just, I've always heard them used together. General Felman, they are dillying and dallying. No, no, no, no, don't get on. I'm sorry. We will be meeting at the fort on the border between Erios and Corovacia.

We have an informant, a spy on the inside of Erios and a member of the resistance. You will meet him there and he will take you across enemy lines and you will be responsible for using your best judgment in order to seek out the goal that the High General has given to you. You will receive no support from our soldiers once you cross over. We will give you support on the line.

He will give you covering pressure. Keep any and all warriors, any of the Aarakocra off of you until you get to the forest. And we should hide any kind of any emblems or anything related to Korovakia, is that right? That is correct. Right.

I have this face tattoo that says Zandra. I have like a big heart. Wings of the Raven. General, sir, how many days are you expecting for us to reach the fort? Under two weeks. Understood, sir. Depends on the conditions. If we get waylaid, I doubt we will. And the Horn Legion seems to be marching north. I do not believe we will need to worry about them.

and I will send scouts and soldiers ahead to make sure that any of the natural creatures and monsters in the area are properly slain or driven off. - Do you need any help with any of these carriages? I'm pretty good at handling a horse or two. - My men are more than capable. - Okay. - Are you ready to begin? - Yes, sir. - Very well. And with that, he dismisses you and climbs into his own carriage.

and you all hear the groaning and creaking of the huge metal gates rising up, and then as you pass, slamming down heavily. And

Behind you, you see that although the battle happened a week ago, you still see the remnants of the absolute chaos incarnate in bloodshed. As you see massive swaths of earth that had been completely chunked into by the Hellfire machines, the deep grooves from their hellish wheels. You see the...

what had once been a beautiful field is now torn up from hooves and marching boots. And you see the bits of the trees off in the forest where you fought Moloch completely incinerated and knocked over and torn by the Horned Legion in Baphomet. And as the Zentra gets smaller and smaller behind you, you wind through the...

the hilly highlands and eventually you see one final glimpse of that massive city built along that craggy rock as you turn around a ridge and Zentra disappears behind you. You travel for about a week and you

do not have many times, much time for breaks. You stay at inns when you are able, and it seems as if the innkeepers have no option to be paid by you, be paid by anyone, as the inns are effectively commandeered. If there is no vacancy, the patrons are cleared out to make room for the traveling group. And

and where there are stretches of area where there is not a lot of civilization. You camp out and there is a heavy group of soldiers circling you on guard constantly. And I'll say that as you ride, you have opportunities to talk with General Furman and you eventually

you get to know him a little bit more. And there is a seriousness and gruffness to him, but as time goes on, you start to kind of see little glimpses of Krex.

in that rough exterior. As you make your way closer and closer, you can see the mountains and the hills and the fields of Korvacchia, usually gloomy, but not particularly stormy. It's actually quite beneficial. You make it there faster than you were expecting. As you see a large stone fort rising up

in the distance. You get closer and closer. Is there anything that you guys want to have been doing or saying while you are traveling? Talking about? I would have tried to attempt to give coin to the shop, like the innkeeper, as we found out that they weren't being paid and that their stuff was like commandeered basically. But other than that, nothing off the top of my head. I would have like a slight distaste about it.

Okay. I would just try to, as we get closer and closer, kind of in my morning and evening ritual, kind of praying to the wind spirits, just seeing if I get any different sense of kind of closeness as we get closer to Erios, just to see if anything's changing. Make a religion check and a nature check. I don't have a cure.

Uh, religion check is a, uh, nine and, uh, what's your call? Uh, nature. Uh, that is a 17. 17. Um, I will say that, uh, every, every time you camp and you, uh,

You rest, you place out your four figurines and you pray and you commune with the four wind spirits of the Makani Islands, your home. And every time you do this, you feel just a very, very, very slight breeze around you and it kind of whips around very slowly and there doesn't seem to be any particular change.

- Got it. - Okay. With that, you all, and I would say Felix, you are able to sneak some coin over and just make a slight handshake for me just to see how. - That's gonna be a yikes for me though.

Just kidding. 21. 21. I'll say you're able to do it subtly and kind of basically sneaking into the palm of the innkeepers. And I'll say you probably spend 15 gold pieces across the whole long journey. Bingo. And... I forgot this is a really epic song. I'd probably be pretty quiet throughout the journey. I would be the last person to fall asleep and the last person to wake up.

I would be spending most of my time just writing songs that I think that are occurring to me and just sort of enjoying the fact that we're in nature even though I love the city, Zentra wasn't my city. So I'm enjoying the fact that we're changing scenes a bit. Okay, so you eventually arrive and it's evening and you get to this fort

and you see that there are dozens of soldiers stationed on every single level of the fort as it rises up. And you see that past it, deep into, deep on the horizon, a large valley leading to a massive canyon with a roaring river. You see little bits of the river. It's difficult to see just because of how deep into the canyon this river is.

and on the other side you see these massive trees of completely dense forests of trees of a size that none of you have encountered in any of your travels that seems to be almost unnaturally large as you see

that this large valley on either side of the river has the remnants of battle. Scattered, discarded bits of armor and scrap, pieces of bodies, blasts,

blast marks from either explosions or spells or magic, and you see very far off in the distance, the sky above this large forest is dark silhouettes. You eventually arrive into this fort. You're welcomed in by a number of soldiers. You see that there are a number of trenches dug out on either side.

battlements walls built in across the river being the obvious border of the between Corvacchia and Erios and as you are all welcomed in it's into the night and you're all ushered into a uh a small um mess hall with uh

There doesn't seem to be any distinction of where the commanders eat and drink and the general soldiers. This far out from Zentra and this close to the front line. And it's late enough that most of the soldiers are either asleep if they need to be or on watch.

and it's eventually the six of you and General Fuhrman. You have a very modest meal of tough bread and bits of dried meat and anything from your own rations that you would care to supplement. And there seems to be a bit of cheap wine and cheap ale as well. And I would like, is anyone talking to General Fuhrman?

during this whole time. I think I would like to try to learn about, at the very least, casual conversation too. I mean, I wouldn't be like grilling him. Yeah, we'd be talking. I'd want to ask him if there's any dwarves in Eerios and I'm assuming my knowledge of the area is very limited. Yeah, I would say you know nothing about it.

I would like to ask about the Ocoxian Court and just kind of like get a vibe of why they think it's so sinister, why they don't like it. I want to like feel out his personal interpretation. Okay. Iris, anything? Okay. So I would like all of you to just make general charisma checks. Non-natural honey.

Ooh. 21. Gotta give it up. 21. 5. 5. 24. 24? I wasn't gonna ask him anything. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just gonna be a casual conversation. Yeah, that's fine. So as you're... You get the sense that... He tells you that there are no dwarves that he knows of. And you get the sense, Lufty, that there is...

that the reason why he hates the Okaksian court and why people think that they're so sinister is that, um, it seems to be a big gist that there's, you know, military political enemies and they're vying for land and resources, but they do seem to be very totalitarian and they have an iron fist on their populace. And so...

They also have been using horrible magics in order to kill their soldiers, kill the Korvacian soldiers. You see the skies over the forest, amidst these dark flapping silhouettes, are these large looming storm clouds. Large looming storm clouds over these forests, and they start to roll in. You hear the loud booming of thunder, and you see the streaks of lightning.

Eventually, as soon as you enter the fort, it just begins a heavy downpour as the storm rolls in. You mentioned a large crevasse. Yeah, it's a huge canyon of this massive river that runs all the way down. And that's between the fort that we're in and the Chol-Tol. Yeah, so basically the fort that you're in is on this precipice that leads out into this little huge valley that seems to just have dozens of battles. How wide is the crevasse? Over 100 feet.

So it's sort of like a natural border between these two countries. Yeah. Okay. And I'll... Yeah. And so I'll... And I guess I would say it's difficult for you to tell how wide it is. It looks like... It's very far. It looks like it's a wide... It's not 40 feet. It's like... Yeah, yeah. It's really far. It's not like a gap. It's like a big old... It's a large canyon, yeah. And as you all arrive, Furman sits down and...

and passes you all, or rather you all get passed your drinks, you all have your meal, and he kind of scratches the bit of skin underneath his eye patch, and he kind of looks a little irritated, and he drinks a bit more than you've seen him drink in your time knowing him. And as the night goes on, he looks at all of you and says,

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You're all sitting and you're enjoying your drinks. You know that you're heading into Erios tomorrow. Furmin is several drinks in, and he's still maintaining that level of stoicism. However, he seems to drop his guard a little bit as he looks at all of you with his one good eye. The eye patch covering the other one, obviously. And he says, I...

I don't know what Xurn sees in all of you, but I've never met a man with better judgment in my life, and I would go to the Nine Hells and back behind him. So I know that I can trust all of you. Is this where you leave us? Do we kind of go forward without you? I will stay here. You will meet up with our informant, our contact.

that knows Ereos well and you will travel with him. Into the forest. Do you know him? I have met him. What do you think? Good guy? I reserve judgment. He is proven useful with his information and his knowledge of Ereos and his connection to his rebellion that he is a part of has allowed us to subvert many of the goals of the Okaxian court. How will we know this informant when we see him?

I will introduce you to him tomorrow. Oh. That's easy. We don't have to cross and just stumble across him in the woods and we pick the wrong guy and then it's a huge mess. He is also taller than you, Toa. He's a fear bulb. It's very difficult to miss him. Well, then that sounds great. I don't need to be the tallest guy. That's fine. Nothing wrong with that.

This may not be my place to say, but since we're talking about spies and the spy network and our very limited, um, knowledge of the, of the eyes, are you guys looking for a replacement for Kujata? We are still having discussions about that. I have known Zurn my entire life, and there's no man I trust more on this planet. He saved my life.

And I trust him implicitly. This was the first catastrophic lapse in judgment that I've ever seen from the man. So he obviously must think very deeply about whether or not we need to replace Kujata. We've divvied up his responsibilities to the rest of us. General, sir, if I may, Toa brought up a very good point earlier about our symbols and the things that we've been gifted from the military in Zentra.

Is it wise to even just stow them away in our packs while we are over there? I certainly don't want to forfeit them, and I've never been captured in action, but I can't imagine what would happen if we were found with those things on our person. Stash away anything that gives away that you are connected to the Korovakian military.

The magical items you are gifted have no connection to us except for, I believe, yours, but... I'll keep it secret. I'll keep it well hidden. I have for a very long time. Should we be changing our names or our identities at all while we're over there? They will have no idea who you are. Word doesn't spread of this war that we just had and these mighty heroes fighting back Malak. We have not...

Spread that word at all. Wait, will it spread? Through the spy networks? I'd rather not have to go by Thomas anymore. Because I'll screw that up. What was my name? No, we didn't call you Bert. Thomas is the name of my son. And then you were Bert for a while. I was Albert.

You want Albert? I want Siegbert. But I went by Bert. You didn't go by Bert. No, I went by Albert. I claimed Bert first. You did. It was way cooler. It was very cool. Very cool. Yeah. I think we can use our own names. We're going to be all right. I agree. It would be...

From my understanding of the conflict and what's going on here, the people of the Axian Court don't care who we are and they're not gonna know of us. We're just a bunch of nobodies, it's fine. Well, I wouldn't say "nobodies." I didn't mean to speak for either of you. Of course everyone knows who Iris is.

Of course. It is good that we're not going to have to share our name or change our names. That can get really confusing really fast. I just can't. I can't lie all that great. And I don't like to lie. And I don't want to set up a pretense. But we should probably at least have some sort of script of where we came from. I'm right there with you. I hate to lie, too.

Well, then perhaps what we're doing is we can say that we're tourists and we just want to hang out and explore and travel the whole continent. Let's talk to our informant before we come up with a modus here. Oh, that's right. That's right. Very wise. He may already have an in or some sort of a pretense for why we're in the area, but the fact that we're coming from the front lines, I'm sure anyone we would run into might be suspicious, so I hope that it's ironclad.

Of course. Well, I'm excited to meet this gentleman in the morning. I don't think I've ever met a fear bulb before, have I, DM? I would say probably not. Would I? I don't even know what those are. Would I? I would say that people who have been from general... I might. I think that you probably would have, and you probably would have, because you've been traveling around, right? Yeah. Yeah. She gets around. She gets around, yeah. Are they native to this continent?

- And they're native to a bunch of different places. - For me though, because I don't know what me does not know what it is. - You know that Fearbolg are just these large creatures that are generally like beings of the forest. They're super connected to nature. They look like these like fucking, they've got these big bulbous noses and floppy ears and they're covered in like hair. They look like kind of like Scandinavian trolls a little bit. - Oh. - Kind of like cow ears. - Kind of like cow ears but fluffy, yeah.

And they love the nature. I'll do a little picture. We'll do a little picture of Fearbulb. Oh my god. I'm like, I'm gonna come away. Um... So... Hold on. Let me just close that. So this is... Can I get porn on this? Yeah. We'll get a Fearbulb up here. So that's what they look like. Kels? Oh, yeah. That's cute. I like that. So we're just showing them. We're showing Cameron. Oh, no. The standard. There it is. Fearbulb. I didn't know that's what you were doing. I thought you were showing Kels from up there. So...

Uh, he says, "Well, this is of utmost importance, and I have heard what you did in combat, and while I usually reserve judgment on combat abilities until I see it myself, I would trust Zurn with my life, and I know what he is capable of." Well, I hope we can gain your trust too one day. Perhaps. Perhaps. But Zurn's confidence is all I need.

Will you be here on the line for, uh, indefinitely? Are you going back to Zentra anytime soon? I will be here at least for a week or so. There's much to do. The war is intensifying, but we will have to keep our eyes on the Horn Legion as well. There is much confusion about, it seems as if all of our enemies on all sides are ramping up their efforts, and we have no idea why.

Are there any more wars that are coming your way? I saw that battlefield outside look pretty awful. Is that normal? That often? It continues. Are you expecting another one soon? Another battle? I'll have to discuss with the commanders here. For your sake, I hope not. We will give you the cover that you need in order to get across. Well, we'll get prepared and get across as quickly as we can. Very well. This is... I...

Assume you saw Zurn on the battlefield yourself. Yeah. We did. Artemis? Yes, sir. He was very anime. He can take care of himself. Animated. He can. That's what I said. I saw it firsthand the moment he was able to achieve those powers. It was the most impressive thing I've ever seen in my entire life. He did... I'm sorry, sir. He did something to...

achieve that level of power? Or these were gifted to him? What do you know about it? He nods. I think I'm weird. And you can tell that... You owe me a healing potion, Felix. Damn it. Here, take this one, Noah. I can't wait to drink this or feed it to you when you're at zero hit points.

You didn't buy a healing potion? We have a potion of poison in Prime, which looks like a healing potion. Oh, I didn't know that. And his face is a bit flushed as he seems to be. He takes another drink of wine. As he nods, he's like, yes, I have the power of the Raven Queen. It saved his life and mine.

And you see that his eyes kind of glaze over as he stares off. Eye. Go ahead. His eye. His eye, exactly. His eye glazes over as he looks forward and he says, we were both 19. Just boys and trying to prove themselves in war came from nothing. And we were drafted. Like,

Allboys are in the Korvacian military. And we were sent north to the front lines against the Orcs of Grond. Because that was so long ago. Our battalion got ambushed, slaughtered, beaten, devastated by their weapons, superior strength, beasts, tribal magic. My eye got clawed out by one of their falcons. And Virgil, his arm got shredded.

In combat, he took down the biggest orc I've ever seen, but... Mortally wounded. His arm was clinging to the bone. Both of us were bleeding out in the snow. And then I heard him... mumbling... praying... three times. And then... the Raven Queen heard him. The feathers... horrible. Cries of... bird. And he rose. And he slaughtered...

Dozens of orcs. His arm was useless, but he didn't need it. One arm was enough. Wings from his shoulder blades. Feathers all over him. I saw the power of the Raven Queen that day. I hadn't truly bought it. When I saw that, I knew she was real. And then it was that next day, after he had pulled me into the medic tent. I barely survived. He showed up to visit me and...

And there was that bird sitting on his shoulder. It was no only matter of time at that point, no question, that he would become the High General. And he did. It's an inspiring story. And I think he shows how worthy he is to lead the country of Corovacchia. He is. And that's why I trust him. That's why I became a religious man after that day. He kind of snaps himself back as he looks at all of you and says,

Well, I'm sure you all have war stories, but hopefully you don't need to call upon the Raven Queen to the extent that he did. Was there nothing that could have been done about his arm or your eye? No sort of healing magic to help? Once they were ripped out and almost ripped off, healing magic is what saved both of us. Well, saved me.

It was that incredible power that saved him. Well... Thank you for telling us that story. I was very curious about all of those things you just said. Very curious. If you don't mind me asking, how long have you two been around? Nineteen... I mean, not to ask your age, but does the Raven Queen grant any sort of immortality? I wish I was that worthy.

She is powerful and I'm sure Zurn will long outlast me. Are they both human? Yep. We're both 60. Never would have guessed. Not a day over 30. Right, Lufty? Yeah. Very smart. You can see like the lines in his face and like the bristles in his mustache. There's a crack of a smile on the corner of his lips as he stands up and nods and says...

I'm gonna get some sleep. You all should do the same. He walks off. What a story. So that was over 40 years ago. And they're still at war. It's the crazy thing. I just can't believe that these people have the drive and the energy just to constantly fight the whole time. I mean, it's a very dangerous land. They're constantly trying to protect themselves from the onslaught of the Beastmen.

But non-stop for as long as I can remember and I certainly haven't been around as long as they have. It sounds very tiring. I'm glad that we're in good hands though, they both seem very capable. Agreed. I think... It's like evening, right? Yeah, it's night. It's into the night. Let's get to bed and then we'll head across the canyon tomorrow.

So, you all enjoy a long rest, and you wake up the next morning, and you are met, you are guided through the fort, and you are met face to face with the, with the, with General Furman. And he says, I hope you all had a good sleep.

I'm going to introduce you to Arnflammet. And he guides you through the fort, outside the doors. You see soldiers running about as spellcasters, warriors, are all getting ready to prepare to escort you across the battlefield. And

As you make your way down this pathway to a small little tent, you see a figure sitting down and then stands up as you approach. And you see this creature with this gray skin covered in hair, shaggy brown hair, and a very small beard, large bulbous nose that has a reddish

orangish tint to him with ears that flop back and he looms over most of you. He even stands a bit taller than you Toa. And General Furman steps up to him and says, "Umlanda, this is the group that you are to lead."

We appreciate everything you've done, but these six individuals are sent by the High General himself. You must make sure that they achieve their mission. The survival of your resistance and everyone that you are harboring depends on it. You understand? And the...

The Fearbulg, this huge individual that's wearing very simple leathers and seems to have an old bit of branch of oak that's carved into a walking stick. He nods and says, oh, sure, absolutely. Absolutely, I will. And he turns over to you like, my name's Alanda. Very nice to meet you. And if I were to write that down, how would I spell that name? L-A-N-D-E.

-U-Landa? -U-Umlanda. -Umlanda. I thought you said "Landa." -Umlanda. U-M-L-A-N-D-A. -L-A-N? -D-A. -Nancy? -Nancy. -Umlanda. -Not Yancy. Not B. Yancy. -Umlanda. -Umlanda. -Umlanda. -Well, that is a big boy. -It's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Caprice. -Now you're little Caprice. -That's how you can call me, Caprice. -I mean, next to him, he's only a few inches taller than I am.

How tall are you? I'm like over seven feet. Oh, so he's probably like a half an inch. He's like an eight feet tall. Okay. So he's like half a foot, not half an inch. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's half a foot. So he's a few inches taller. It's a pleasure to meet you. I've never seen a fear board before. Oh, most haven't. You look very cool. Are you strong? I mean, being that big, are you very strong? I don't pretend to be very strong. I do not like to hurt people.

I only do it because I have to. Well, I'm very impressed and we're all very excited to join the resistance and help you take down the government. Yes, that is what we are doing. And Furman steps back and salutes all of you and says, you have your mission. My men will escort you, provide cover while you approach Eerios.

Get into the underbrush of the forest as soon as you can. Umlanda is an expert tracker. He'll keep you hidden. Thank you, sir. Thanks. Yeah, thank you. Very well. May the Raven Queen watch over you. This mission is critical. Achieve success. And he turns away and he steps. All the soldiers salute him as he steps away, leaving you with this huge fear bulb. And...

He, uh... As he looks at all of you and says, "So, what all can you do, then?" Umlanda, it's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Felix. And I'll hold up my hand. Ah, Felix. I'm a wizard. Ah, you're a wizard? Can you make fire come from your hand? Yeah, I can. That is impressive. My name is Umlanda. Can you make fire come from your hand? No, I can't. Oh, what do you do normally, then?

Like combat wise. - Well, I prefer not to get in combat unless I have to, but I can do this. And he extends both of his huge hands and you see flashes of green and a pile of these bright purple berries appear.

in his hands as he says, does anyone want a good berry? Ooh. I'll say good. Sure. It looked like good berries. It's in the name. Have I? I wouldn't know. I'm going to say no. I walk over to him and my head probably touches his hand so I have to reach up. You grab a good berry. Oh, feets.

Well, that was delightful. Thank you. Very good. That's very tasty. And you fight with these? Are they poison? Oh! Nope. They just fill you up and they taste pretty good. All right. Well, my name is Caprice. Like I said, I can weave magic with my music because I'm something of a troubadour, a bard, so to speak. Caprice, it is nice to meet you. Hey, nice to meet you too, buddy. My name is Umlanda. I'm looking up at it like this.

What is your name? We're going to be traveling far. You're like two feet taller than me. It's really impressive. How tall are you? More than... I'm five foot. I'm a very tall dwarf. I'm Hirja and I'm full heart. I come from Yona. I've never been to Yona. I've never been outside of Striga. It's my first time in Striga. You're welcome. Hopefully you do not die. Thanks. I hope you don't die either. You seem really nice. Me too.

I try. He's pretty nice. I'm Lofi, hi! Hello. I'm just looking up like "hello!" Hello, how are you? Yeah, I'm very good. It's nice to meet you. It is nice to meet you too. What can you do? Well, I can do a lot of things. What does that mean? I guess you'll find out. She has really good gear. I do! Do you like to drink? No. Oh. I mean, I like to drink water and tea. We'll change that. You just haven't had the good stuff. You wait. You'll see.

He turns to you and says, oh, a tabaxi? Are you from Ereos? No, darling, not at all. Oh, I have not met a tabaxi not from Ereos. I'm not sure if there are any from Nekbet. Nekbet? I have never been to Nekbet. You should come visit sometime. There are tabaxi. We have wonderful tea in Siket. What kind of tea? And he kind of perks up a little bit. Lotus. Lotus. Both poison and...

- Do you have non-poison lotus on you now? - I do not. - Well, hopefully I can get some of that. - One day. - We have tabaxi in Ereos, but they are not with black fur. They are orange. - I'm sorry. - It is very strange. He turns as he turns around and he puts his stick on his shoulder and you can see that he has a large number of packs on his back.

As he looks over his shoulder, like, well, let us begin. It will be a long road. Yeah. Keep your eyes to the sky at all times. I will try to keep all of us out of sight. Let us know if there's anything that we can do to support you in this journey at all. I'm happy to help. Thank you very much. Anything you can do to help hide us, I would appreciate. I'm going to swing my spoon around my back like he has a stick and be like...

Well, I guess Peyton shouldn't come out then if we're trying to be sneaky. For the best. Okay, well I hope you get to meet Peyton one day once it is safe. I think you'd like her a lot. Who is Peyton? Peyton is my musk ox. I do not know what a musk ox is. Great.

It's like a big ball. Have you seen an ocelot before? It's like a strange primate. It has nothing to do with cats. We tell tales of ocelot around the fire. Would you like to tell Caprice what an ocelot is? Oh, I hear it is a horrible monster. Not real, though. Sure. See? It's like one of those.

That makes me afraid. It smells exactly like... No, it's like a big bowl. It's definitely not stealthy, though. It'd be like a bowl in a necklace shop. Think of Baphomet, and then imagine if it was smaller. I hope he is nicer than Baphomet. It's not. Well, I will stand very far back. Are Firbolg naturally very strong? Like, to Toa's question, out-of-character question, are they really strong? They're stronger. They're just large. They have that natural...

that natural strength. - Okay. - But you look that he's probably not the kind of person that would have high strength. - Okay. - Or would have beyond his natural ability. It's not like he did actual work. - He's not ripped. - Yeah, he's not ripped. - Okay. - He's dressed very simply in just these natural leathers. There's bits of kind of moss growing on and some patchy business all over his clothes. - Cool.

The racial benefits are definitely in wisdom more than anything else, I think, if I remember. Yeah, I don't know anything about them, that's why I was asking. So, he says, well, all of these nice Korovakians will help guide. They have been nice to me, and I have given them information they need. Hopefully we will one day be free.

How long have you been part of that resistance there, buddy? Yeah. For six years. Six years. Oh, my goodness. That's actually shorter than I expected it to be. You guys are just starting. You're a little bud, so to speak, on the branch of resistance. Yes. They keep finding... That was very poetic. Oh, I'm a poet, and I didn't even comprehend that I was a poet. Realize it. The...

He looks at you and he tilts his head a little bit and he says, "Well, they keep finding our hideouts and many people die, but we still fight for our freedom. Fight to be free of the Okexian Court." Do you have a sense of why they're finding your hideout so frequently? Yeah. Well, they are very observant. They have magic. They have much power, more than we have, but we are good at being sneaky.

What makes them resistable? Do they do bad things? I mean, they're killing you because you're resisting, but do they do things... What sparked the six years ago moment when you were like, gosh darn it, I'm gonna... Well, there have been the... What the fuck did I call this thing? Sorry.

We're just gonna ask you all the questions. I'm also gonna ask whether he has any siblings. How old he is. The Oaken Rebellion, or the Oaken Alliance started long before I joined. And we want to resist because we are beneath the great tree cities of the court. They do nothing but tax us relentlessly and those that

They perceive to have any transgression, they execute without question. No trial. So this is sort of like a capital punishment reform type deal. It is bad. I have seen many people taken up to the trees and never return. Well, perhaps we should head out right away just so we can make sure to help as much as we can while we have the time. Agreed. We will go under cover of darkness.

And eventually the sun sets and darkness falls over the battlefield. And you see that the storm clouds are completely covering whatever moon there would be. As you see the flashes of lightning and cracking of thunder, as you begin to make your way, it just starts to completely pour. As you're all completely drenched,

and a number of hooded soldiers flank you, and they keep an eye to the sky at all times, directly ahead. And as you're making your way down through this valley, going around large rocks into smaller ravines, and making your way through this rough terrain, you see that off to the distance, there is a flash of fire and lightning, and you see a number of individuals

there seems to be some kind of clash on either side of where you're headed, drawing off the whatever soldiers there may be from this point. And as you make your way to the huge canyon ahead of you, you hear the roaring of the river get louder and louder. And as you approach, the Umlanda looks at all of you and says, "We have to scale down. I hope everyone is not afraid of heights."

- How far is it to the bottom? - Several hundred feet, but we will not go to the bottom. - Oh, I'm used to climbing up and down volcanoes, so this isn't that different. - Well, let's make our way down. And so he begins to start scaling, and anyone without a climbing speed, I'm going to need a athletics check. - So everyone but... - At disadvantage. - Oh boy. - At disadvantage. - 'Cause it's Raymond. It's very slippery and wet.

You said what kind of check? Athletics? Athletics. Yikes. It's gonna be an eight for me. Ooh, wow. I'm gonna cast Levitate on myself and just kind of push, walk my way. I would say that that would make it not disadvantaged with that. 25. 25, okay. So what was it again then? Athletics. Athletics at disadvantage. Put me at... At disadvantage, I get a nine. You said athletics? Eight. Eight. Not acrobatics? Yes. Athletics. That's unfortunate. I'll go with a 12. A 12? Yep. Okay.

I got an eight. An eight? Okay. So, as you begin to climb down, you have to make your way through very narrow passageways and down these really treacherous rocks. The rain is pouring. You're completely drenched. And as you're making your way down, you see that, Felix, you feel your foot start to slip.

as you lose your footing and you begin to slide down. Toa, you see Felix just begin to slip into his grip. - Am I able to grab him? - Make an athletic check. - 23. - 23? You manage, you, Felix, you feel your footing give and you slide down about five feet and suddenly you feel the massive hand of Toa reach forward and grab your arm.

Oh, buddy. Oh, thank you, Toa. You should be more careful. It's just, it's raining a lot. Have you never climbed anything before? Not like this. Well, he... I give him a little bit of...

Actually, I wanted to see, are we just climbing? Would I have access to maybe get into the other part? Yeah, I'd say there'd be a part where you can get to climb down. However, as you're reaching Anahearsia, you start to climb your way down and you lose your footing as well. With my climbing speed and my tabaxi movement, could I grab her? Yeah, because you're climbing, make an acrobatics or athletics check.

17. 17. So, Herja, you feel like you're making pretty good ground. And, however, as you go over one rock, you kind of lose your balance from the sheer weight of all of your armor as it's getting completely waterlogged now. And you slip and begin to tumble off. Iris, you see this and you...

use your feline agility, you sinking your claws into the loose rock and you sprint forward with all of your limbs and Persia, as you feel like you're gonna plummet into the river, into your death, you feel a furry mass beneath you that you land into

you see Iris directly beneath you. Oh, God, those thighs are heavier than I thought. I'm sorry. I appreciate the help. I'll try to get off of you now so I don't see. It is not your time to die, darling. Please, hold it a little tighter. Here, wipe your hands off on my fur. Right here. Not down there. Up a little higher. Oh, okay. And just sink your nails in just a little bit. Oh. Yep, move them back and forth. Yeah? Oh, yes, yes. Oh, God, you got it. Yes. It's very itchy. Okay, now, proceed.

No, thank you, darling. Let's go. So feeling like you got the best scratch of your life in that moment and you feel like you narrowly avoided death, you managed to get a finally a firm grip and get to a small outcropping. Lifty, you feel you're like, even though you are...

this water isn't agreeing with you. The sheer rain isn't agreeing with you. The ability to levitate is making it a lot easier. So if you fuck up, you just kind of float back. Oh, I'm okay. And then you float back and you manage to get down. And then you see as...

as Ulanda says, oh, well, you all are good friends that prevent each other from dying. It is very treacherous. I am alarmed that several of us almost died already. Anyways, and you get to this little outcropping, and you see that there is a very strong knot of roots there.

that is growing into and out of this ledge. And it's difficult to see in the night, but you see that there is a thick knotted about five feet across mass cord of knotted vines and roots that grows from one side of the ravine to the other. And he looks at all of you and says, "Please stand back. I don't want you to get tangled up."

and he puts both of his massive hands into the ground and you see the earth start to rumble as these two large vines erupt from the ground and begin to intertwine, wrapping around and around and around, making it even thicker and seems to flatten out a little bit as it shoots forward and sinks into the earth on the other side. And he...

He turns back and says, "Well, this is a bridge. Good luck." And he steps forward and puts his huge foot on it and slowly makes his way as the storm is crashing and

thundering and lightning all above you the rain pouring down every single flash seems to illuminate his silhouette as he begins to cross and eventually he makes it his way to the other side and says see it is sturdy it will if it can hold me it can hold all of you all right fine i'm going and i'll just start to walk across the same size right

- Yes, I do not know how dense you are though. - I'll be second, I'll go after you. - I'm pretty dense. All right, let me give this a try. I just wanna like put a foot out and like feel. - Okay, you put a foot out and it definitely gives a little bit from the sheer weight of this massive Goliath creature that you are, but it feels like it's sturdy enough to hold. - Okay. - I think I'm going to catch a ride and I'm gonna like loop my finger through Toa's belt loop and just kind of like float behind him. - Okay, you do that.

And so I'll say that as, oh, you're going first Caprice? - I'll go after Felix. - Yeah, Felix will go first. - Oh, Felix is going first. Okay, I am going to need, as you're making your way across, I'm needing an acrobatics check. - Now you're speaking my language. - All of us or just two? - Well, Felix for now. - Oh boy, I think I got an 11. - 11, okay. So as you make your way across, you are the, the,

thick bridge of roots and vines is very slick and you feel like your foot is almost giving way a few times and you think back to almost sliding down the cliff into the river and you steel yourself and although you almost mess up a few times, you make it across and Umanda greets you. He says, "Well done, human friend." - I do what I can, I guess. - And Caprice, you're next.

That'll be an 18. An 18. Caprice, you with confidence, despite being totally drenched, you just walk and casually stroll across the bridge with no issue at all. What a lad. Okay. Who's next? Okay. Erja.

- As she rolls off the- - Whoa! - Yeah, go, 20! - Gotta give it up. - That was just too good. - I'm watching closely and I've got fly at the ready, not in a readied action, but if anyone needs to go down, I'll be able to whip out my bow. - Okay, so you see Herja look at this bridge and she just thunders across it, seeming like paying no mind at all and it,

as if your feet are being guided by Moradin himself, you are protected as you make your way across without issue. - I got one foot in front of the other and looking down and going, "Hum, hum, hum, hum, hum, hum, hum, hum, hum, hum." - - Coming to myself. - Okay, who's next? - I'll go across. - Okay. - You got this, buddy. - I'll give him inspiration. - Do I, ooh. Oh, nice.

And it's just a dex check? Just straight dex? No, acrobatics. I'm at 1d8 for the inspiration. 16, 20, 2, 1d8. Oh, sorry. No problem.

23. 23. So you manage to cross easily as Lüfty. You are easily able to just loop on, and with your levitate ability, you're able to just get pulled with that roll, I'll say. It's effortless, as you just loop around one of the straps that covers this massive, muscled goliath, as you just float behind him, and eventually the pair, and it's just Iris left.

- You said acrobatic? - Correct. - 16. - 16. And after showcasing that feline grace, climbing up and down this wall off the cliff face, you see Iris effortlessly, gracefully make her way across the bridge. And Umlanda greets all of you and says, "Well, I am impressed. "You are cut out for wilderness travel.

This bridge really came in handy. I'm glad none of us died. Yeah. Should we take down the bridge so that no one knows we crossed here? No. The birds, they do not notice when there are hundreds and thousands of human soldiers across the ravine. Oh, we're using them as a diversion. Yes, that is the plan. Oh, that's smart. I never would have thought of that. I still feel like we should do something about this bridge. Is it easily destroyed? Can we, like, give it a quick burning burn? What...

I would like to keep it up in case we have to get back. Takes a long time to get it. And I think like starting a giant fire might, you know, be like bad. That fire is just one suggestion, but you know, I hear your words of wisdom. Let's just leave it up for now. That's fine. Always know how to get out. And hopefully we will have to need it to get back if we all survive.

So let us go, and as you see on this side of the ravine, it seems to be a lot easier to make your way up, as there are larger pathways and ramps as you begin climbing up, and eventually you make it to the other side, and Umlanda turns to all of you and says, "The forest is right up ahead. "Everyone stand close to me, "and we will hopefully get in without being noticed."

And as you all huddle around, a kind of burst of shadow emanates from him, and he casts Pass Without a Trace. And everyone make a stealth check, please, adding plus 10. And I'll say, because Cover of Night, we need advantage, please. Ooh. Fuck yeah. Very cool. At advantage? At advantage. Ooh. 25. Natural 20 on the other dice. Woo!

25. 25? 27. 30. 36. I had a 25, which is so far below. 27. It's going to be a 33. Okay, 25? Got it. 35. 36. Holy shit. Rolling hot tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Yeah, we'll see what happens. This is true. This is true. This is true. Umlanda. Umlanda. Umlanda.

That was obviously inspired by Jorn, right? Yeah. Okay, I knew that. I'm trying to do his... I mean, yeah, it's not good, but I figured... From Norway. From Norway. Yeah, you kind of have this very interesting way of speaking. Nice IPA, and not a lot of people like it, but I like it.

The sweetheart. Anyway. I love him. And so you all meld into shadow as the bare rocky precipice eventually gives way as you run quickly into thick,

overgrowth and bushes and vines. And as you get closer, you can see that Umlanda's hands are glowing with a faint green light as the plants seem to open up and welcome you into...

Into them and as soon as you make it into the underbrush you begin to make your way closer further and further and eventually the darkness of the storm gets even darker as you make your way beneath the massive boughs of of the enormous Erios forest and as you as you are all sneaking through you

look up and you see that the forest is almost fully protecting you from the rain and the storm that has been relentlessly assaulting you for the past several hours. And you aren't really seeming to get wet at all. There are a few occasional drips dripping down, but this canopy is so densely packed

that it seems to almost just create a ceiling for you. And you see, as you make your way through, it's night and the forest seems to be alive. You hear the calls of dozens of birds, but predominantly you hear the deep hooting of owls.

especially at this point of night, as some are screeching, some are letting out a higher-pitched rapid hooting, and you hear the occasional, like, deep, grumbling hoot that seems to echo through the forest. And all of these seem to be... some of these seem to be slightly unsettling and sound very strange.

as you also occasionally see up above you, very faint in this dark canopy. And actually, do all of you have darkvision now that... Do I? I have 60 feet as a dwarf. I do not have darkvision. Okay. I don't either. So... I don't think. You might. I don't know. I do. 60 feet. I don't think I do. So I will...

So Felix, I don't really need this anymore, can I give this to you? And I want to take out the Lantern of Revealing that we got in Session 1 and probably have never used. Correct. And I want to say, we've only got this in our journeys before we met up with this... Did we get it during the session or before? You got it in the first session. We've only first met up with these guys and got this Lantern?

Yes, of course. Well, I think you should use it. It seems very thematic for your character. Well, I appreciate the gift, thank you. I'm going to be honest with you. I lean in closer so just how you can hear me. Normally I'd be able to make it so I can see in the dark, but I wasn't well prepared today. Oh! I didn't know. Well, I think just so that everyone can see...

I don't think we should use this. No, I think this is lovely. I look towards our guide, whose name that I didn't forget, it's Umalanda. I don't want to bring attention to us using the lantern. If you all can see, I can hold on to somebody and just navigate through the darkness, as long as we don't get too far away from each other. What do you think? Well, I believe the light may be fine in my magic if I keep. I devote my resources to keeping it up.

but if it will help you see, then you may use it. Does he need to see? For now, I'm not going to risk it. I can guide you all. You follow me. I'm going to tie the lantern to my belt, and I'm just going to hold on to Tala.

And if you want to just tie yourself to me and just float behind me. Yeah, that's a good idea. So I'll do that. And then I'll also just kind of grab Felix like by the buns and like walk behind. Okay. Lofty. What? Where are you? Please just grab my arm or something.

Do you want me to? Just kidding. I'll grab your arm. She's just sorority girl hugs you from behind. So you all manage to get a no dark vision train going and Wanda guides you through the underbrush. We will have to be extra stealthy, but once the sun comes up, we will have less risk. They of course are nocturnal.

and you are led through the underbrush and eventually night passes and night passes and you've been up all night as he guides you through and eventually the morning sun begins to shine through and although the canopy is very dense and it's definitely not nearly as bright as it should be

There's still the forest for the first time lights up for you. It seems as if the you occasionally hear the low rumble of thunder but you It's no longer doesn't seem to be that incredible storm that was howling all around you the previous night and you occasionally see the flapping of wings and and a winged humanoid creature and

flying through the sky. And I'll say that you see one close enough to make out that this is a creature that is fully humanoid, arms and legs, and with appendages ending in sharp talons. Heavily armed.

large brown wings and the head that looks like an owl with huge yellow eyes as one just flies directly over you and you all duck down in the morning light. However, it seems to fly off and the activity in the forest gets quieter and quieter as night leaves and eventually it becomes daytime. And you, Umlanda, turns to all of you and says, well,

I think it is time that we make camp. It will be a several day journey to my village. I don't want to be presumptuous, but you mentioned that these people are nocturnal. Does it make sense for us to be traveling during the day and sleeping at night to avoid detection? We do not want to be sleeping while they are awake. Alright. I have gotten many of my friends killed. I trust you.

I walk over to him and put my hand on like his elbow, because that's really probably all I can reach, and I pull out Dakota.

I know that you said you don't mean to hurt people, you prefer not to. I'm the same way. I prefer not to hurt people. I'd rather get to know them and talk about porchetta and share recipes and whatnot. But this is Dakota. She is my sentient weapon that my dad made for me. And she'll let us know if anything comes close by and she will alert us so that we can't be surprised. That is very helpful.

Hopefully it. We do not have to use it, but we probably will. Yeah. What's the range? What's the range, Run Dakota? I think it's 30 feet. Before we go to sleep then, what I'll do is for more coverage, I'm gonna cast Alarm in several different places. Okay. I don't know. I mean, you know, if we're going to bed, right? That's the idea. I'm just gonna use four spell slots to cast Alarm in four different places. Okay.

Well, maybe then, if we have the ability to stay alert even while we sleep, maybe we can travel during the day. We will sleep now, though. Of course. Okay. Good night, everybody. Good night. Sleep tight. Good night. And don't let the... Are there bedbugs here? Are there bedbugs in this country? I do not know what a bedbug is. They're just bugs. It's the forest floor. Don't let the forest floor bugs bite you.

Don't let the forest floor bite you either, oh, that would be pretty bad. That would be bad if the floor could bite us. The forest floor, or any floor really, frankly, I mean, how could a floor bite someone though, really, if you think about it? I agree, what kind of cruel god would make the floor of the forest a mimic? That would be very horrific, and don't give the DM ideas, please. Yeah. As he takes notes. He scribbles furiously in his notebook. Yikes. So.

Well, uh, should we take watch too? Or are these- is this magic good enough? I'll stay up. Couldn't hurt to maybe do rounds like we usually do, but hopefully the magic will give us an extra level of protection. Very well. I will take first watch. Should we stay quiet and probably like not start any fires or anything like that? I think it- because it is daytime, I think it is fine to light a fire. It won't draw too much attention.

Alright, I'll maybe make a small fire and have some sausages or something. Some sausages. I can take second watch. I'll take third watch. Yeah, I'm going to go to bed. I need one more. Happy to take the last watch. Okay. I think Iris is gonna sleep tonight. I'm already asleep. I'm just rubbing her belly. So easy.

Very well. And so you all sleep. So the first watch passes. And Umlanda wakes up, Toa, and goes to sleep. And it's at this point on the second watch. Toa, I need you to make a perception check, please. Yikes! Oh, fuck! Um... Nine. Nine. You...

You take your watch, and you hear nothing and see nothing. Eventually your watch is over. And I'll say that you finish a long rest as the... It's still daytime, but the sun is definitely low in the sky at this point. And with that, you awake.

awaken and all gather together and continue to travel. You travel for several more days as you begin to start traveling during the daytime to cover more ground and at night

I'll say let's just get a group, one more group stealth check and one more group perception check. Is he using? Yeah, he's using Pass Without Trace the whole time. That's what he's blowing energy from. Pretty good, pretty good. 33. This is not an advantage. Is it perception? Stealth? It is a, yeah, a stealth check. Not an advantage because you're traveling when they're awake. 29. 29, okay. 22. With Pass Without Trace? Yep. 29 as well. Hey. 29. 31. 31.

- 20 dice are hot. - 22? - Yeah. - Iris? - 33. - 33? - These are Andrew's first dwarf dice, so I figured I'd use them. - Stealing, we're gonna go with a 36. - 36? - I would like to steal, Mike. - Okay. - I would steal. - So you...

As you make your way through the forest, you manage to stay completely out of sight. However, as you're continuing to travel during the day, you're still awake at night and you see above you all manner of winged creatures. There's tons of varieties of birds in this forest. Owls everywhere. You see massive...

that are 10 times larger than the average one, soaring through. One manages to sink its talons into a deer not too far from you and fly off. And you see regiments of a dozen or a half dozen of these winged owl Aarakocra. They are in very sleek armor, armed with spears and swords and bows as they fly through and patrol.

you see bits of... you see the light and the fire of actual towns.

There actually seem to be small pathways. And there are towns that seem to be built into the forest. A very simple... A very simple... Oh, thank you for the follow. Thank you for the follow. Isamu28. Thank you. Isamu, Isamu, let us know how to pronounce. Let us know. Yeah, we love the pronunciation. And you see that there are... That there are actual pathways. That there seem to be...

humanoids that are going about their lives, but they seem to be downtrodden. And you see a number of races that are prominent here. You see that there are fearbolts, more than just Oomalanda. You see that there are tabaxi, cat folk with a

with orange fur varying in shades of darkness and brightness. You see forest gnomes with their, with a slight copper greenish tinted skin and pointed ears. And you see lizardfolk, seem to be the green scaled lizards that seem to all kind of congregate in these small villages that you're passing and never entering because as you approach you see that

There, above every village, are a number of wooden perched and watchtowers where these Aarakocra sit.

keeping a watch over the town. It seems to be heavily guarded. So you said we're passing these different places. Do these villages have lanterns and lighting sources? So we're just walking through or around? You're going around and passing them. But they're lit up. They're lit up and it seems to be heavily guarded and watched over by these owl-ears. So how long... Well, I'm going to turn to him, Londa, and just say...

Do you know how far we intend to travel today, or are we going to reach some place within the day? We can maybe make it to my village tonight. Then in that case, I'll say, I'll turn to Lufty and I'll say, just don't say I never did anything for you. What are you going to do for me? And as soon as she grabs my hand, I'll cast Darkvision on her. Okay.

Wait, is it day or night right now? It's night. It's night? We slept through the day? Well, you've been traveling for a couple days now. Yeah, but I thought we were always sleeping through the day. So you're usually sleeping through the... But daylight will be longer than... Yeah, daylight will be longer than night. So I'll say that at night, it's at night at this point. Well, that's what I was asking about the lighting and if you saw the fires in the dark. Like, I was just making sure it wasn't

If that was a dumb question, I was just trying to understand. No, no, no, no. Yeah. And so it's nighttime, and so you are able to see a lot better in the dark. And it's at this point that you... Thank you, Felix. You manage to sleep one more time, and Umlanda assures you that by sunset of the next day, you should be able to make it to his town.

And as you've been traveling, however, although you've been seeing these small little villages, you've seen light coming from above you. Hundreds of feet up into the air and these massive trees built into the treetops are these huge cities of beauti- or cities and towns of beautifully crafted wooden buildings with this glow that seemed to be completely alive of these winged creatures.

and they seem to be living in the lap of luxury from what you can tell. And it's a stark, stark, stark difference to life on the ground. As you see this, you make your way through and I'll say, Toa, while you are, are you praying, doing the same thing every time? Yeah, yeah. Make a nature check and a religion check at advantage, please. So religion first. 18. Nature. 18.

15. 15? Okay. So, 18 and 15. So, as you place out your figurines and you begin to pray, the wind begins to whip up.

and it's stronger and stronger as it kind of swirls around you in a small whirlwind. It starts to whip around you faster and faster as the wind begins to whip up around you and starts to whip past you in the direction that you're headed.

It just starts to gust. And however, as this happens, you feel a sense of just inexplicable danger. That's what you feel. Guys, I think we're in grave danger. And this is as we're preparing for bed.

Or it's the first thing you do when you wake up, right? Yeah, in the morning. Or in the evening. Or either way. I'd probably put it in the evening or in the morning. You mean it's the first thing you do when you wake up, not before you go to bed. No, it's both. Oh, but this is when you wake up. This is when you're going to travel through the day and get there by sunset. Okay. What do you mean? I think we're going in the right direction, at least as far as the wind spirits are concerned, but I also get this sense in the pit of my stomach that there's some kind of

Grave danger that awaits us. No other details beyond that. I just think we need to be very on alert. Was it the Goodberry? Slow acting, like upset tummy? No, no. It wasn't like a stomach feel. It was a sense of just pure... Was it like dread? Yeah, like a sense of dread and oncoming danger. That's awful. And I can't quite articulate it, but I think that...

There's something coming our way and we need to be very mindful of it. Please be on alert is all I'm asking. Of course, always. Yeah, we got Dakota too. And I think Dakota will be invaluable as we continue onward. I got your back, buddy. Thank you. Always. Thank you. So as we travel, I want to kind of just keep my eyes, like be very on alert.

Maybe try and, like, um, Umlana, if we could just maybe drop the pace just a little bit. I feel like there's some danger either watching us or approaching us of some kind. If we could just drop the pace. Just basically asking him to kind of go a little slower that day. Okay. If possible. Is that what drop the pace means? Okay. To slow a roll, perhaps. Drop the pace. Okay.

The system is down. The system is down. He looks at you and says, oh, that would be just fine. For sure. Oh, God. There, there, sleep. Hopefully we can make it by sundown. Um, of course.

So you make your way through under root, over these huge logs, sometimes having to go through these rotted out logs from these massive trees that had fallen who knows how long ago. As you continue through, and as you are making your way, it's about the afternoon at this point, and you...

see a very small clearing with these incredibly dense thicket, this interlocking bit of vines hanging down and roots knotted up, and as you begin to cross, as you begin to cross, you step out into the clearing. And I need a marching order, actually. Please?

I'd be letting Umlanda lead the way. Yeah, and I'm behind Toh wherever he is. I'm somewhere in the middle. Okay. I'll be right behind Umlanda. That's fine. I can be in the back in case anything speaks up on us. I'm kind of in there with- Are you a Dracula now? So I'll be right behind you. Wait, where are you, Jer? I'll be- I'm in second. I'm right behind Umlanda. I'll be third, so he'll be fourth. And so her is in the back. I'll kind of be like walking right in with you guys. Okay.

So, as you begin to cross this small clearing, it's this beautiful... It's almost beautiful that there seems to be a slight gap in the canopy, and the sun is just shimmering down through. And leaves are just gently falling down, and you see the...

towards the side, the trunk of this massive tree rising up and you see the huge roots going in and as you step into this clearing, you see, who's the lead again? Besides Wanda. - Caprice. - Caprice. - Yeah. - Make a perception check, please. - Pretty fucking good. - Let's go with a 21. - 21, okay. - Oh, um.

So it was in the early morning when Toa told us about how he felt. Yes. I'm going to cast aid on us. Okay. So that we would have that going. Well, you'll find out in a minute. Jesus, let me read my fucking spell. All right? I am. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus.

I'm gonna cast it at a third level so we all get 10 hit points. Maximum hit points. Wait, not even 10. Maximum hit points go up by 10. Is that override max HP or max HP modifier? Override max HP, add 10 to that. So I'm at 92 max HP, ladies and gentlemen. Really? Man, you're kind. Jesus Christ. Much higher than mine. Oh, that's not good. Because that means that if you... Add 10 to your normal?

And then do that as override max HP. So 62. Yeah. Yes. So that makes it so that if you drop hit points, you can be healed for higher than what your normal. That's so fucking good. Which makes it better than 10. Is it until long rest? Is that concentration? No, it's not. Wow. That's awesome. Very good. It's for eight hours. No, we don't. It just increases your max. And it's definitely been within that window. So you should be at what your new maximum is. Okay. Yeah.

Okay, so you cast it because I warned you that there was potential danger. I feel sturdy. And as you enter the clearing... I meant to do that, but I forgot. Caprice, you notice a bit of movement in the roots. Sitting on the roots, you see a figure that is sitting down, completely covered in cloaks with a hood.

Multiple cloaks? Yes, multiple cloaks. He has two on, or she. Was wearing two cloaks. Just curious, he said cloaks. And with a large hood. And you see the figure begin to move and stand up as you all enter the clearing. Hey, Umlanda, does that guy look familiar to you? And I point out the figure. Umlanda looks and says,

"Is that a firbolg? He seems to be about my size." And as you align for the clearing now, you see a large figure standing on one of the roots of this tree. And it turns to face you. And you hear a voice call out from beneath the hood. "Towa!" "Is that you, Makoto?" "What are you doing here?"

I should ask you the same question! What are you doing here? It's very dangerous here, Tewa. How did you get through these woods? I'm the true warrior. You're weak, you failed in combat. You're going to bring shame to our tribe. You think that I'm weak, but you're the real weak one. You have no spirituality. You think you're on the right path, but really you're simply strong. It's not just about strength, Makutu.

How did you get through these trees unharmed? So, as Toa is saying this, you're all entering this small clearing, and... I'm gonna pull out my fucking toad and I'm fucking ready to go. Oh shit, Toa! What's the matter, buddy? What's going on? This is him! Who? This is the dick! This is the dick! This is Makoto Flambin de Taihi! Hey, dick! Fuck you, dick! Wind chaser.

I thought we were friends! Flamebender, we're not friends, no. You think you're strong, you're really not. Just because you train and you get strong and you can beat certain people in combat... ...unconsequentially! Mark you, and he pulls his hood back and you see a Goliath head.

up here, covered in tattoos the same way that Toa's is, but rather than these black tattoos, they're these deep, dark red, spiraling tribal tattoos. He has hair that is cut a lot shorter than Toa's in braids that are just directly down to his shoulder length. His face is covered in a number of scars, and he has a nose that seems to be broken and unaligned in one, in a place.

You never beat Toa! He's the strongest person I know! You haven't met me. What are you doing with all of these outsiders, Toa? This is a tribal quest for our tribe, and you are bringing outsiders? That's where you're wrong. You- you do- do- do the spirits speak to you? They speak to me still, even gone. I can feel them. Do they- can you feel them?

I don't need to feel them Toa. I will seek them. I'm the strongest. I was chosen by the tribe. And you are bringing shame to me and especially to yourself.

You can't talk to my friend like that! Yeah, that's not very nice. We don't know you, you don't know us. Yeah, you think you're so great. Why don't you come over here and settle this over an arm wrestle or something? You misguarded. I think you're being led down the wrong path. Makoto, please stop your quest. You don't know what you're doing. Yeah, your morals are as crooked as your nose. Oh!

Use a twist. I'm using a twist. I'm using a twist. Thank you, chat. There we go. 17. Go fuck yourself. Go fuck yourself. You fucking dick. As you say that, he takes several steps forward and he says, Tell you right. I never meant to. I never meant to bring

Shame even to you. I'm here for the same reason you are here. This is a quest for us as kin. But why do you raise your weapon to me? Do I think he's lying when he says that? Make a, what do you call it, Jack? Insight check. Can I insight him as well? Yeah. I'm going to go with a 23 on that, buddy. I'm going to go with a 17.

Sorry, I had to. 23? 17. 17. He seems to be incredibly honest as he steps forward, as he extends his hand, as it emerges from the cloak. It is, you see that it's

It's also heavily scarred up and just covered in these spiraling tribal dark red tattoos. And he approaches them. So we're supposed to be friends. Maybe we... I came here searching for the spirits. Caprice, he's lying. Terrible. Wait, you...

Put down your weapon, Toa. Hey, hey, he's lying, buddy. He's lying. Can't you tell he's lying, buddy? He seems genuine to me. I don't know what to believe. Do you trust him? I thought he was telling... Are you sure he's lying? Are you lying, Makoto? 100%. Why would I lie? Tell me. Tell the truth, Flamebender. Why are you here? What speaks to you? If not the spirits... Toa. He steps forward. I can't... I got my fucking totem ready to go. Hey, don't you fucking touch him.

a smile comes to his face and a smile comes to his face like I came here with my plan and it seems as if you intend to get in the way you will not disrupt what I'm attempting here the spirits do speak to me a single spirit which spirit

Toa, give me a handshake. No. You are of my tribe. Don't touch him. Stay back. Don't touch him. I put my hand in my coat. And as he says four, he says, I speak to one spirit. The spirits that you seek are long gone, Toa. No, they're not. I can feel them. Don't you say that. I've already won.

I serve one spirit, Tiki Roa, and immediately he throws his arms down and an eruption of flame bursts out of him as his tattoos glow and his skin begins to shift and you start to see that where there was once flesh is crackling volcanic, uh, uh,

rock and magma pouring out of the same pattern of the tattoos. Eyes alight in fire and where on each of his, where each of his arms were are two huge volcanic gauntlets.

as his cloak is completely shredded and incinerated by flame, and there's nothing left beyond just this volcanic creature ahead of you, and he raises his arms up, and the ground begins to rumble and shake, and you feel incredible heat coming from beneath you, and you never want to make... Roll for initiative and make a dexterity saving throw. This guy's a badass. Nomikutu!

And I'm going to put on some battle music. Oh, initiative? Oh. Dexterity save. I've got a 10. I'm advantage on both of those. Fuck. Oh, boy. That scared me. Fuck yeah, baby. 20, 25. I'm a 20. For initiative. I'm sorry, I'm a 23. I don't have initiative cards. 26 for capricci. 23. 23 for capricci. Yeah. Yeah.

Let me just do this. Lifty. The priest is 23. Okay. 15, 20. 19. 19 for Toa. 15 for Lifty. 10 and 15. 12. 13. 13.

You can go first if you'd like. Persia, Felix, Iris, and then I'm going to roll for... Are we doing theater to the mind or is there a map? There's a map. Half of it. Which half? Towards Eurish, so just kind of push it back. As three massive pools of lava erupt from the crackling earth right there, that's it. Oh, wow, that's pretty. And, uh...

And so, I need dexterity saving post from everyone. 11. 10. 11. 10. 18.

Pass. 17. 17, pass. 21, and I'm going to use my reaction, if I succeed on this, to use my Shield Master feat to put my shield between me and whatever this is to potentially take no damage from this. And what was the number again? 21. 21, so you saved. And so...

Most of you manage to leap out of the way as the ground crackles and splits and lava emerges and erupts. So these are these? Yeah, those are those things there. And you guys are all back. You're all back.

Towards where the camera queen is, Reg. Okay, so we're all back here. Oh, and if you're within 10 feet of me, you get +2 on your saves. Oh. But I don't know how we're standing. I'll say you're all within 10 feet. Yeah, yeah. So we're all here. +2 to save. So did anyone not pass? If you're within 10 feet of me. The DC was 15, so... I didn't pass. So yes. Even with the +2. Okay. So... There is... So he's over there. I'll say Toa is probably... Did you want to put it on the map camera, Reg? Oh yeah, let's do that.

Three pools of lava erupt out from the ground as these massive gauntlets ignite with flame. And most of you are able to dodge, however Felix and Iris, it's too quick for you as you get singed by this. You still manage to get out of this lava pool, so you get connected to Iris and Felix. However, you do get blasted by the convection heat and you will take some damage. That's a little exciting.

There's no science. Science is C and D! Uh, you're gonna take, uh, da da da da.

12 points of fire damage. Yikes! As it blasts you and actually... Thank god for those 10 points. Seriously, holy shit! You're gonna be a fucking... You'll never be used to being on the other end of that! Zarnak to Umlanda. Umlanda, yeah! There he is. And Umlanda will just be Zurn for these. You know this guy's gonna be a fucking badass.

If he's gonna take on all seven of them. And as the lava crackles, you start to see that there's a shape that forms. Molten rock and lava starts to form and coagulate as a creature arises in each of these pools. And it seems to be the lava made flesh as you see that it's a beast that has huge arms ahead as they almost seem to be

Simeon in appearance and six lava elementals appear, one in each pool. Or three lava elementals appear, one in each pool. Okay. - Oh fuck. - Look at that badass. - That is so cool. - Well that's not good. - Yeah, combat time. - What did you guys get, Toa, Caprice? - For initiative? - Initiative. - I got 19. - 19. - Okay.

Okay. So, with that, these creatures and Makutu looks at you, Toa, and says, "You will not interfere with my plans, Toa!" And then with that, Rhys, it's your turn. Not really knowing what's going on, I'm going to see the large lava monster appear in front of me, and...

I'll run towards me so I can get away from it around Loopty. And I got 30 of movement. Yeah, just try to put me in between those two guys. Yeah, right there. And I'll look at the big guy and I'll be like, if I had a copper for every time I didn't know what was going on, I'd be like, why do I keep getting all these fucking coppers? I'll cast hideous laughter on him. Yes. He needs to make a...

DC 16 wisdom saving throw, I believe? - Fails. - He fails, so he starts laughing and goes prone. - So you see this large ape-like lava elemental getting ready with its huge muscular looking arm, the lava dripping down, some of it the molten rock hardening.

and it looks like it's ready to attack and then it just This one? No, my apologies. I intended to target Makutu. Oh, Makutu. Okay. Actually, can I? It's a 30 feet range. I'm not there. Okay, so I'll make the one that's right next to everyone. The one directly next to you. This one is about to hit all the squishies that it's next to and it immediately falls over into the pool of lava starting to sink down into it a little bit laughing hysterically. Toa, you're up.

I am going to... So that's six. Seven and a half, so I can get there. I am going to... I'm going to... Six. So I'm gonna run up here and... Hold on, let me just read something real quick.

I'm gonna say, "You were supposed to protect the spirits, not destroy them!" And two can play at this game. And I'm going to cast from my bracelet that Zurn gave us. You're gonna see this water start to erupt from my bracelet as this massive watery shark. Hell yeah! Nice! Right here. I mean, it was magma, so it's kind of antithetical, but...

So he's going to emerge here. We're going to use the dragon for now as the shark. That's really cool. And I'm going to cast Conjure Elemental. Okay. And a Surgeon Shark... I mean, the bracelet of the Surgeon Shark and a Water Elemental to equip the shark is going to erupt. And I guess I need to roll initiative for him. Yeah, you see a splash of water. Wow. So he has a...

- 20, I think 22. - Okay, wow. - Did you roll a 20? - Yeah, roll a natural 20. - 22. You see seawater swirl around the bracelet and then blast forward and with a splash of water, this shark starts to thrash around floating made purely of seawater. - Man, that's cool. - Is that your action? - Yep, it's all done.

- And I will rage as a bonus action. - Okay. So you see Toa go into his battle trance and these glowing spirits all swirl around him and it is Makutu's turn. As he looks at you, he's like, "I'm supposed to be here because I was the strongest. "Now I will fulfill my plan. "The spirits are gone, Toa."

I don't believe you, I can feel them still. And with that, both of his gauntlets are going to glow with magma and he's going to look at you and say, "You are always weak!" And he's going to punch you five times. Holy shit! So far right up to me? Yes, he's going to step there, yeah. Lumi is a sharkman. Lumi is a sharkman. Five times. Did you roll for each of them? Yep. Definitely a yikes from me though.

Okay... Does it taste like suntan lotion? Oh wow. Three are going to miss. Two are going to hit. Is this pure fire damage or is it... There'll be some... I'm gonna roll the bludgeoning right now. Okay. Two are gonna hit you and that's going to be...

12 points of bludgeoning damage and 7 points of fire. I take the full 7. As he... As he's punching, he manages to punch you twice and the last one falls off. It hits you in the gut. I need you to make a concentration saving throw.

- Constitutions Day info, please. - Another nine for 20, holy fuck, two in a row. - 2400! - 27. - 27. The sheer force, it looks, and he punches you in the stomach, the sheer force, it feels like it's attempting to knock you unconscious from how rough it was, and you manage to resist it. And with that, it is Lifty's turn.

Okay, I'm gonna walk my way around the other... I'm gonna put a little pep in my step around the other end of the pool so close enough that I'd be in range of him. Mm-hmm. This one? Yeah. And I'm going to say, Oh, you think you're so hot, but I think you're a big burnout. And then I'm going to...

I'm gonna make, just whack him twice to the quarterstaff and then high kick him in the face. Okay. All of those are at advantage because he's prone from my last turn. I'm gonna low kick him until he gets the save. What? Say that again? Well, I guess he'll be prone the entire time, so that'll be fine. You'll get three saves. Okay.

So make that two whacks in the face and a curb stop. Got it. Because he can't stand up until it's turn, anyway. Okay, so first at advantage is 17. Second at advantage is... He could break out of it, potentially. He's got three chances to break out of it right now. 24. For what? The last turn? The AC is 16. Okay. If he's attacked, he gets to...

Break down the last two. Oh, I see. I hadn't gotten that far in the spell. Thank you. Sorry. Well, it's happened. So all three hit. Okay. Well, you gotta tell me how many you got. He's still gonna be prone even if he makes these. Each time it takes damage. Okay, so that is 8, 9, 13, 17, 21 damage. Okay, 21 damage on number, what number is that? Can't see from here. Yeah, 2? 2?

- Yeah, sorry, it's a two. - 17 damage on number two. - And then he gets three saves. - So you smack with your spoon and it cracks into the molten rock and you follow up with two more punches and you're able to pinpoint locations where you're able to hit without getting burned by the lava as it spills out. However, each of your punches cracks this molten rock and he gets three saves. - DC 16. - DC 16, wisdom? - All wisdom.

Wiz, DC 16. What's his int by the way? The first two fail, it's 10. The last one is an 18. As the final hit punches him and as this eight creature is laughing it gets broken and he takes the full damage, however. Okay. With that, it's Hurt's turn. Sorry dude.

Persia is gonna write her Helmet of the Ram. I think that's what this is called. Yeah, Helm of the Charging Muskox. I have Ring of Ram on here, I apologize. She's gonna look at this elemental that's in front of her and say, no, in front of her. That's right next to you, yeah, and say, oh man, you're hotter than my hot dish! And she's gonna make a Helm of the Charging Muskox attack against her. Okay.

How many charges? It's got three charges. I'm gonna use one charge.

Ooh, that might miss. With a 10? A 10 on the elemental guy? Yes. It's plus 7 bonus. I don't add anything to that attack bonus if it just says plus 7 on here. Plus 7, yeah, it's plus 7. So the AC of the lava elemental is 16, and his is 17. Well, shit, you're still hot as shit. And I'll use my bonus action to try and... Oh, he's already... Oh, wait, that was an advantage, right? Yeah, yeah. He's prone.

Alright, 17! Yep! Yes! That hits! That hits! This is why we go with prone. It's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good. So is he still under Tasha's or did he break out? No, he broke out. No, he broke out. Yeah. Which means he can stand on his turn. But he's still prone until then. Yep. He takes four points of force damage and he gets pushed five feet away. That way there's no safe point. Oh, hell yeah. Okay. Does everyone get to make an attack of opportunity? No, because he's getting pushed against his will. So there's a magma pool.

right there or is that just him? Like if I step in it, do I get burned? - Yeah, you'll get burned. It's very dangerous for you. So you see Persia lower her head, her horned helm glows and a spectral musk ox head appears and smashes into this magma ape as it's trying to get up.

from laughing hysterically and he gets blasted and gets pushed out of the magma pool. Would, um, since I have extra attack and I took the attack action but with the magic item, would you rule that I have... Using your magic item, you have to use your, you have to use a melee weapon attack to get the double attack. Melee weapon attack only, not magical item attack. Yes. Okay, gotcha. Um, well in that case, I will, um, can I get to the other, uh, 25? I don't have very much of it now.

Oh, the party is level seven. You can stay out of the lava and get to him, but I don't know how it's going to affect you. You know what I mean? If you want to stay out of the lava, you can't because you can't go through Kels. Do you still want to move that way, though? No, I'll stay right there. I'll use my bonus action. Um...

Then you cast Thunderous Thighs on Dakota, and go the thighs. You clap your thighs together, you hear the clanging of a hammer on an anvil, and her flail glows with this molten energy. And then I'll look at Felix and be like, "Alright, find some cover, get away from this thing!" And that'll be my turn. Okay. With that, the zadaa.

Felix Rell. Having seen Hersha just headbutt this motherfucker, I'm gonna be like, "Hersha, thank you!" And then, "Toa, I'm coming!" 10, 15, 20, 25, and I'm gonna cast Haste on Toa. Show this guy who's boss! I love this! You feel incredibly empowered and you gotta go fast. You hear the fast ticking as the dagger glows with the silver light. And you have haste. Iris Rell.

I am going to move forward a little bit and I'm going to look at, what's his name again? Makutu? Makutu, yeah. I'm going to look at Makutu and I'm going to say, you rely a lot on your strength.

Let's see how this fares. And I'm going to cast Raven Feeblement on him. He has to make a constitution saving throw, so he's probably going to be okay. I've never used it. No, he's not fair. This is where we find out with all the corner. Yeah, he passes. So you...

cast out a hand and a beam of this sickening energy hits him and as it glows over him it looks like he's starting to crack and he manages to resist the magic and he's like my strength is all I need and my volcano spirit god and with that it is...

The, the, uh, what do you call its turn? The Elementals. The Elementals turn. The Elementals. And, uh, the one is going to, uh, step forward towards, uh, you, Caprice. He's gonna come towards Caprice, Persia. Yeah, he's going to Caprice. He's going right there. How much is his movement? Uh, 40. Oh, okay. Oh, crap. The one directly next to Lufty's gonna go for Lufty. It's in range. Oh, yeah, well, it's gonna rise up there, and then the other one's gonna go to Persia.

Oh boy. They do like this and there's this crackling, crackling, molten timbre to their voice. And with that, they are all going to... Is Two still prone or did he get up just now? Not yet. He used his movement. He's now up and it's his turn. And with that, they're gonna get three attack, or each one is gonna get attack on you. 17 to Caprice.

I will use cutting words to, uh, I'll be like, uh, get away from me, you big magma fuck! Uh, and subtract three from that. Uh, my armor class is 15. 15, so... It still hits, doesn't it? Wait, no, 17 minus three is 14. Oh, well, I don't think you... It literally misses. Woo!

- It barely misses, and so you see these two massive volcanic arms getting ready to beat you and try to grapple you, and you use the weed to cut it with words and it just barely misses. You dodge out of the way. Okay, we're gonna get one on Herja.

And you manage to raise your shield as it smashes into you, Hersha. That smashes into the shield, and then we're going to get one on Lufty. I will, if I still have my reaction. You do. It's a new round. I will impose disadvantage of that with my shield. Disadvantage, okay. Shield master. 17. 17?

Does it hit you? Oh, I thought that was against you. The first one was against me. The second one was against you. Oh, sorry. 17 does hit me. 17, okay. So you raise up your shield and it manages to sniff out through your illusion and it smashes into you. And... Two starts.

- 11 points of fire damage as you are singed and then you feel the volcanic arms try to tighten around you and need you to make a strength saving throw. - Oh no. - 13.

13. Barely, barely as it tries to smash its arms and hug you in tight, you just manage to slip up your hands and push out the arms. They fall to the side. It's looking angrily at you. And that's their turn. And with that, it is...

Umlanda's turn. And he is... Where is Umlanda, by the way? By Iris. Okay, by Iris. Who got, like... He's gonna step over to Caprice, and he's going to place a hand on you, and it's going to glow, and it's gonna say, You look very wounded, friend. And he's gonna cast Cure Wounds on you, and it is going to heal you for...

Seven points of healing. Oh, thanks, buddy. I actually haven't been hurt at all. Oh, who got hurt then? I did. You got super burnt. I got it. So he's next to Iris, who's going to cast it on Iris. Seven points of healing to Iris. Just remind her. Yeah, I'll remind her. I'll remind her.

Your fur's looking a little singed as he heals you. Thank you, darling. It's Shark Jones' turn. Shark Jones! He's swimming around as this watery shark guy, and he's going to leap and open his mouth and just fall right down on the coot right on top of them, and he's going to use Whelm, so he has to make a DC 15 strength saving throw. Okay.

It's gonna be a 23. That passes. He rolled a 1. So nothing happens. Hold on, let me make sure. He's worked four bets. Okay, so he's gonna chill there. That's it. Okay. Hold on a sec. Um... Ez...

However, the shark elemental leaps up and pours over him. However, although it does not seem to grapple him in its watery jaws, the sheer water starts to have an effect on the lava as it does some cold damage, as it starts to douse him and the volcanic rock starts to crackle, and it's going to do a bit of damage to him. Sweet. Not that much, but enough. Oh, you said to use Ice Knight? The one that I didn't prepare? Okay. Ah!

That's a nice knife. You should use it. Caprice. Caprice. Yeah, that's me. Okay, I'll... Can I hit everyone in a 40-foot cube? Do you think I could get Makutu and the three gentlemen in a 40-foot cube, or is it just...

- Oh no. - Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 40. Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 45. No, absolutely not. So if you use the point, you won't make it to these two back over here. You either get these three or like these two, probably these three are your best bet would be my guess. - Yeah, yeah, I have a 40 foot cone and I know how to use it. All right, I'll...

Oh, so do you want to like readjust and like go that direction? Well, I can pick a point and then it's a 40 foot cube in my- Oh, sorry. Within 120 feet. Is it a 20 foot radius? No, no. It's a cube. Yeah. Oh, cube. Sorry. So it's a 20 foot radius, technically, but it's a cube. So square that off. And so pretend it's a square. That's how big it is. Do you want to play with this? Oh, really? And the cube is from you.

No, but it's 40 feet. That's not 40 feet, is it? It's 20 feet across. Sorry. Or it's sort of a radius, which is 40 feet across. Pretend it's a square. Can you fit the three creatures into that tube? Yes, but visually, I mean, mathematically, yes. Visually, it's fucked me up. I'm going to hit the three creatures with slow.

And I'm gonna start singing because that's what I do. I'll sing... Alright, I'm casting Slow on those three creatures with a third level spell slot and I will sing...

Uh, Ho-Ro the Rattlin' Plane, the plane down in the multiverse. Ho-Ro the Rattlin' Plane, the plane down in the multiverse. Well, in that plane there was a land, a rare land, a Rattlin' land. The land and the plane and the plane down in the multiverse. And then I'll inspire, I'll inspire Toa. Yes! Incredible. That's amazing. Great job, Derek. That was great. Thanks. That's one of...

10 more versus. Yes! And, um, wisdom saving throw you said? Uh, it's going to be wisdom saving throw for the three of them at DC 16. Uh, the one next to Persia gets a natural 20. I love having a bard. The, uh,

One next to Lufty fails. Yeah, do. And the one next to me? Gets a 14. 14, okay. What is his impasse or fail? I'm going to run back over towards Umalanda. I'd like to... After I cast my action and I see that he fails, he can't use his reaction to attack him, opportunity me, so I'll move behind him, away from him. Yeah, there we go. Okay, okay.

You have seven points of healing from Umlanda. All right, that's the conclusion of my turn. Okay, well that is still a turn. Go hand, buddy. Wait, we don't get healing? Was that part of what you did? What's that? Healing? No. Umlanda. Umlanda. Iris healing. Iris, just Iris. I'm going to go in with my totem and attack him twice. Okay. More than that.

Right. What's that? Oh, no, three times, excuse me, thank you. Uh, recklessly, so. Okay. The first one is a, uh, 20. Uh, the second one is a, uh, 18. No, not 18. Uh, 8 plus 8 is 16. And the third one is a 16 again.

16 again. So his AC is 17. Okay. But you can use your inspiration. Oh, I will use my inspiration on one of those. And it just happens. So two hit, one misses. Perfect. Good job, Aaron. So it is a... Where are all my d6s? So it's 1, 2, 3, 4. 3 where it should. 3, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. Plus 12...

plus 10 is 22 plus my rage I think is still plus 26 damage total. - 26 damage as you smash into him with cracking his volcanic rocky body and doing a good amount of damage.

And as he kind of stumbles back a little bit, he's like, you're stronger than I remember. And with that, it is his turn. And we're going to see if he recharges his business. And he does. As he, once again, his gauntlets are like, let's draw this again. And five times. And he's advantage, right?

He is. I have plus two AC. He's in the same space as my water elemental currently. I don't know if that matters. Oh, so he's going to actually take some damage as he's going to take as the cold damage around him. He seems to be getting doused out and he seems to be vulnerable to it. And he steps out of that. So that is a good amount of damage. He's going to step out. And

and he's gonna ignite his, whatchacallits, and smash into you. - Ignite his whatchacallits. - One's gonna hit. - My favorite. - 26. - Yeah, that hits. - Natural 20. - No, it's not. Actually, it's a sentinel at death's door, so it is no longer natural. - So that still hits.

Next one is going to be a 17. - Is that it? - That's two. - Oh no, no, it doesn't hit, sorry. - Fuck you. - It's 19. - Four, that's gonna be a, it's gonna miss. And that's gonna be a natural 20. - Stop. - So you're gonna use that like once a round or something? - Once a reaction. - So three of them hit you, right? - Well, Toa's dead. - Yes. - Tell me the physical before the fire. - I will, I will, I will.

Yucks. Yucks, guys. It's a yucks for me, dog. It's gonna be a big yucks for me, guys. 11. Hey, man. It's gonna be a big yucks. 14. 11, 14. 17. I don't care for it. 31 points of bludgeoning. That's not a joke. That ain't no joke. And then 12. Please, gentlemen.

- 16. - 17 points of fire damage. - I take the full of that. - As you're getting singed by his gauntlets and you need to make another constitution saving throw.

- Keep that guy away from me, 'cause he'll kill me in one shot. - Yeah. - 20 something. - Yeah, he smashes you in the face with his huge gauntlet and it's trying to knock you out and he says, "Go down!" And you are managing to stay strong. - Okay, with that it is Lifty's turn.

Okay, I'm going to look at the fire elemental in front of me, number two, and say, oh my god, you're on fire! Better stop dropping more, Arshlok! And then I'm going to... It's Abkhaz.

I'm going to beat it twice with my spoon and then spend a ki point so three punches following it up. Okay. So five attacks total. Damn. Nicely done. So 17 and 19 should both hit. 17, that one misses. Does 15 hit? No. Okay, so three of those hit. Okay. That's eight, nine, um...

I think this is 13, 17, 21. Same as last time. 21 points of damage as you are just smashing into number two. What is their HP? Okay. Mine's are fucking badass. As you are smashing, smashing, smashing into it and you're hitting the rock and it's beginning to crack and it's looking relatively rough but still holding on. Okay. Hershey, you're up.

I'm going and you are hitting number two. Mm-hmm. Okay. I will also take a smack at it with Dakota. For sure. But first I will use my bonus action to attempt to knock it prone, which I think is an athletics contest. Ooh.

- 15. - 23. - 23. - So with your shield, you smash into it and knock it down. It falls back into the lava pool. - And then I'll use my action to make an attack at advantage. - Okay. - Which will hit with a 24. - That'll hit, yeah. - I'm gonna do my thunder thighs attack first. So I do 2d6 thunder damage.

Which is six thunder damage. And it makes a strength saving throw or be pushed ten feet away. Does it automatically fail the strength saving throw if it's thrown? No. How much damage was that, by the way? It was six. Six total? Yeah, six total of thunder. Okay. I'm finishing smite first, or the thunder. What was the weapon damage from it? It would be eight points of bludgeoning. Okay. Uh...

Okay, enemies make a strength saving throw. That is going to be a 20.

So that passes. You smash Dakota, you hear the crackling of thunder as he does not get knocked back as it is prone, but you are beginning to crack this rock as more and more lava is starting to spill out of it. I will make another, my multi-attack against it advantage, that'll hit with a 24, and then this will be 10 points of bludgeoning. 10 points of bludgeoning, you smash into it, continue to crack it.

Okay, with that, it's Felix's turn. Dakota! Dakota! Alright, so that's one full turn on haste. Dakota, Harry! I am going to 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, and just to try to stay within, you know, away from these monsters and get closer to Tela, and then I'm just gonna cast... Oh, shit. Well, Mirror Image on myself. Okay.

So your dagger glows and you see three copies of Felix appear directly on top of him, deceiving his enemies. With that, it is Iris' turn. I'm gonna move up to Makutu. Okay. And I'm gonna cast Inflict Wounds. Is she in range for an opportunity attack? Yeah, I guess so.

And that is going to be a 12. I miss this. You smash it off with your scarab shield. A 19? That'll hit. Okay. I'm gonna place my hand on him, and you're gonna see scarabs and bugs begin to eat away at his flesh. Yikes. Um...

- 25 points of damage? - 25 points of damage as Iris's hand kind of glows with this sandy light and suddenly as she touches him, scarabs and locusts and other insects and pestilence swarm all over him and eat him and he's like . And even though these are creatures attacking rock and fire, the magic seems to do a considerable amount of damage.

Okay. Okay, blah, blah, blah. With that, it is the gorilla on the loosest turn. As one is going to go directly towards...

towards Umlanda as he rockets forward and raises both of his hands and he's gonna hit as he smashes in and will just roll ahead and fails and grapples into Umlanda and like, oh, this isn't good. As he begins to get singed and taking...

Okay. With that, it is the other one's turn. We're going to have... Then we're just going to continue to wail on Hersha and Lufty. Lufty is disadvantaged. You managed to dodge out of the way. Okay, gotcha.

On Hersia, that is going to be a 22. That hits. Okay. Does fire and bludgeoning have any difference to you? No, just poison and charm. Okay, that's just fine. Okay, with that, it is going to be... Oh, she doesn't matter, because this is pure fire. Ooh.

14 points of fire damage as it smashes into you. Can you make a strength saving throw, please? DC 13.

I make it with a 22. Okay, it tries to grapple you and you use your strength to burst out of its arms. Okay, with that, it is his turn. And he is going to use his action to spin around the other side to learn from Caprice. Isn't Caprice...

Oh, he's moving. Yeah. So he's gonna move this towards your priest? He's gonna get around the other side of the monster. Behind him. Yeah, behind him, taking him away. And he's going to place his hand on his charred side of his arm. He's gonna grab his arm and cast Cure Wounds on himself. He's like, This was unexpected. And he's gonna heal himself. Okay. Got it. With that, it is... Water Jones' turn.

Oh, yeah. Are they all slowed or no? No, two of them are slowed, I believe. Can you point out which ones? Which ones were slowed, do you recall? The one on the right is not. This one's my right. So what does that do? Just the negative two AC. Okay, so it's easier to hit them. So their AC is 14, everyone. And they can only have their speed. Negative two to dexterity saving throws. They can't use reactions, which is why I got away from the attack of opportunity. Oh, that's right. With that, it's Shark's turn.

Mr. Shark is going to see if his Whelm recharges. You call me Mr. Shark. It does not. What? That seems like a great roll. So instead, what do you think, Bryce? Instead, it's going to attack twice. Hold on. Yes. It's going to be two slam attacks. Okay.

- I had a Pokemon. - At 17 AC misses the first one. - Misses the second one. So he's gonna be fucking worthless. - Okay, so he is going to Nash and Nash. - He will move on top of him though. - Oh, okay. - I just stop there. - You know what, you can roll the 1d6 cold damage.

- Six damage, so 12 damage. - Fuck yeah. - As the cold damage, he is completely drenched in sea water. As it does a good amount of damage to him. - With that, it's Capricci's turn. - Oh, is it? - Capricci's turn. - I turn to him, land a... - Can you do any damage at all? You need me to kill this thing? - I prefer to support others. - He can't do any damage.

Alright, I'll take a shot at the one that is slowed. His AC is subtracted by two. I'm gonna do a crossbow shot. That's probably... 14. Oh yeah? So it hits. That'll be 15 to hit. He takes max damage. He takes 11 piercing damage.

Eleven piercing? Yeah. To number two. Yep. Okay. And for my bonus action, I'm going to be like, what am I doing singing this song? I should be singing for Toa here. And I'll sing, I saw your height and your many tattoo marks. As a Goliath, you must admit there's a certain expectation. Oh, my friend, I thought that you'd be mean. But you're the gentlest giant that Adventress has ever seen. Ooh.

Oh, I wish you good luck. Hey, man, you belong on a riptide. I'm so glad you're by our side. You're our favorite barbarian. Toa, when you're not swinging that mall, man, I hope that you understand it's okay to get the words wrong. And I'll continue singing. I've inspired you once again. You're so inspiring, Caprice. Thank you. Oh.

And as, right before you do that, the crossbow bolt flies and it's looking like this molten ape is trying to maintain its form as the crossbow bolt pierces through its head. The rock splinters, it hardens up and crumbles into pieces as the lava pool begins to cool. So he's dead. Number two is dead? Yep, number two is dead. With 11 damage?

That was a--exactly. He's been beating the snot out of him. Oh jeez. He's just-- Good thing it's dry--or no, this is wet erase. Well good thing that's gone now. Why don't you get the minis out of it and the dye and-- With that-- --you'll be fine. Preet's is strong like ox. None of these are painted so we're good. With that, it is Toaster. Oh, you're busy.

I will attack three times on this motherfucker. I will attack... Are you ready? For the first one. I'm going to Sentinel Distort that and make that a non-natural. Can you do that? You can probably do that, right? Probably. 23rd. That hits. And then a 21. So they all hit.

Yeah, just when a creature you can see within 30 feet of you. Are you actually doing that? No, of course I'm not going to. Please don't break other people's menus. So she was where? Here? One more card to mine. Right there. And then I was... A couple steps back from number three. Okay.

Love. Number three. Good thing we only drink wholesome seltzer. Yeah, it's just soda water. It's wholesome. So all three hit. One is a crit. So I'm going to do one, two, three, four, five, six. Does anyone have a de-sex? Yep. Seven, eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Okay. I'm good. That will be...

- A fuckload of damage. - 12. - Damn, dude. - Shit. - 20, 26, 31, 37,

Damn. Plus 15 is 47, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, or 57, 58, 59 damage. 59 damage? Holy crap. You're approaching levels of Vandris that shouldn't even be possible. As you...

After being inflicted in horrible locusts and scarabs by Iris, and he's distracted by this huge shark, you swing in your maul, he's trying to block with his gauntlets, but you're too fast with your haste, as you just smash and smash, sending bits of lava and volcanic rock flying as his eyes burn. And yeah, you took a fuck ton of damage. As he looks at you,

And he says like, it is too late for the spirits. You've done nothing. I will still kill you here. And with that, it is... Can I respond? Yeah. I want to shout out, what did Tiki Road promise you to make you do this? And that's what I say as I'm attacked. Okay. With that, it is his turn. And he's going to see if he recharges his business. And he doesn't.

So he is going to use his action to... He pulls his head back and lets out a yell. Ah!

And a huge burst of fire emanates him in a 30-foot radius. Is that a spell? What? Is that a spell? It is not. It is an ability. It is an ability. He's learning, everyone. He's learning. And everyone within 30 feet is going to... Am I 30 feet away? No. Is just going to take...

Wait, no save? Nothing we just take? You just take eight points of fire damage. I don't think he wanted it. Right on the cusp. And you will take one for the, as soon as you enter and the start of all, at the start of your turn, you'll take eight as he radiates this molten, molten business. And he is going to move so it hits everyone. So he's under the sky. So move him. How close does he need to get to get a Lufty? It's 30 feet. Fuck off, mate. Like there.

30 foot radius. Yeah, like, like, like... What's his movement? Keep your finger... What's his movement like? Well, it's six squares, right? What's his movement? Uh, uh, 40.

- You have to get like here. - Yeah. - Well, yeah. - So before he does that, however, he is going to turn to you, Toa, and he is going to, and gonna hit you with both fists and then bring both his fists together and slam down on your head. So we will see what he, and he's advantage, right? - He is indeed.

He's advantaged. He would take three opportunities there. Yep. Holy fuck. He fails on the first punch. Like after he's done his turn, I roll. If you take damage, right? Second punch misses. You don't know when. The second one is going to be a... The third one? 20... And so that is going to deal... We'll do the bludgeoning first, because that matters, right? I'm good. Yes. 11 plus... 15 points of bludgeoning.

So seven. And then this thing. Oh, wow. Really shitty. Six points of fire damage as it smashes down with its two gauntlets as they blaze. I need you to make a strength saving throw, please. Strength? Yeah. Ooh.

- Ooh, that's gonna be fail probably. - 14's a thing. - 10. - 10, you can smash down, you lose your footing and you get knocked prone as he smashes you with both. And then he walks over so that all the rest of you take one D2. Whoever hasn't taken the eight fire damage takes it now. - It's like right here, right? - Yeah. - Give or take. - Oh really? Am I in range? - Yes. - Yeah. - He will walk so that everyone can be in range. 30 feet radius.

And then you always get three opportunity attacks. Yep, three opportunity attacks, go for it. So one's the elemental, I'm just gonna say. If you're prone, you should attack. So I'm disadvantaged, right? Yep. Because I'm prone. Just swing it out.

That misses. But the water elemental will take a swipe at him. Okay. That also misses. You didn't use your inspiration to hit. Iris. I'm not going to. Okay. Iris was my inspiration. You've had two. Oh, I gave you another one.

You hit on all three, so you still have the one that I gave you. I still have the one that you gave me last round. I'm gonna save it. Okay. So, Toa, you miss, and he says, I'm stronger than you are, Toa. The spirits know that you can never defeat me. Yes, I can't. I'm gonna get up just real quick, one second. Just a little bit.

And with that, it's Lifty's turn. All right. I'm going to work my way around to number one. I'm gonna say, "Ready? Okay. L-A-V-A. I am going to fuck your day." And then I'm going to whack with the spoons and then three punches again, so five attacks. Yes. Excuse me. So that's 14. That one misses. That one hits.

That's 20, both of those hit. That one does not hit at all. Three hits. Three hits, okay. Seven, eight.

- Plus 16 is what? 24? - 24? Yep, 24 points of damage. You smash your spoon, it cracks. And what number is it by the way? - One. - One. - Yeah. - And you managed to one is able to dodge out of the way from, but however you managed to start cracking this volcanic rock. With that, it's Herge's turn. - I will see that,

This dude's in range. I will run up to him. I will provoke an opportunity attack from number one. Can you move me on the other side? That's gonna be a 22 to hit. Just 22 to hit? 22 to hit. So that's going to deal this much fire damage. Okay. That lava looks really cool. 15 points of fire damage and then you make a strength saving throw.

- So realistic. Add a little orange in there. - Yeah, it's because he added a different color to it. - 12? - 12, that failed, so you're actually unable, as it smashes into you and then grapples you, holding you tight, dealing an additional

Six points of fire damage as it grapples you tight against its burning body. Don't run past them, they're so annoying! So he's stuck here? Yeah, you're stuck there, yeah. So I can use my action to try to break the grapple, or can I beat on it? You can use your action to escape, yeah.

Or you can turn around and beat on number one. You can do that as well. Beat on him. Do I beat on him at disadvantage? Beat on him. Or is it just... Is grapple disadvantage or restraint? I always get those two. I think grapple, you just can't move, right? To answer your question, Flapnomaniac, yes, we are also DMs here at the table. Nikki DMs two campaigns, Feywild campaign and Curse of Strahd that we're just branding up, and I do a bunch of really random

- I don't care for it. I'm gonna try to bonus action shove him to try knocking prone. So that's athletics contest. 15 is what I got. - Natural one. - Great. He's prone and I'm gonna beat on him. - I would say, could you, because he's prone and you're grappled, he's gonna, I'll say make an athletic check to see if you get taken down with him. - Okay. Natural one.

- As you knock him down, he pulls you back. You both land as he's grappling. The magma ape face is slavering at you. - Oh my God. - You're both prone now and grapple. - Can I use my movement to get up? I have the rest of my movement to get up. - Yeah. - I thought if you grappled you didn't have movement.

Oh. Oh. Your move becomes zero, yeah. Okay, so I just grapple on the ground. So you're gonna attack him regularly now, because it's disadvantage but advantage. I'm just attacking him sideways. Did you attack one or the... He tried to get... I tried to get him, but I got... Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Makuchu. Mak

23? 23 hits, yeah. Okay, and I'll make my other... The big ol' ape. 17? Hits, yeah. Okay. So the first one's 3 points of bludgeoning, and then 9 points of bludgeoning, and then I'm gonna dump a Divine Smite into my second one, so it does an additional 10 points of radiant damage. I'm just like, get the fuck off me!

So after being knocked down and grappled, you're just beating on this lava ape that is trying to grapple you. Okay, with that, it's Felix's turn. So do I take damage at the start of the turn? Yes. Yes. Oh, so, so Herjia, so apologies, so Herjia, you're gonna take, no, five points of fire damage. Felix, you're gonna take three points of fire damage. Ooh. I have to get higher than, what, a ten? Yep. Alright, so I lose concentration.

Okay. Oh, fuck. Yeah. No haste. You can use a twist. We have one twist. Yeah, you can use a twist. Haste is really important. Twist, twist, twist. We have more than one. We just don't have them in there. No, I used one. I know, we had some from last session. Oh, we had some more from last session. Yeah.

We have a lot. That's a beautiful coin. I haven't actually got a chance to see these coins. I don't think there's anything in there anymore. I hope I don't fuck it up. Because I only put two in there. Do you have your constitution on a part of it? It's a constitution saving throw. It's a saving throw. Well, that's even worse. Oh, no, no, no. You passed me the coin. Thanks. Oh, we have a metric ass flip. Yes, I know. How many ass flips? I have them written down. We have 20 left. A metric ass flip. Uh...

Yeah. We have 20 left. Whoa. Holy fuck. Which is actually, yes, every single one of these. We have 20 fucking Christopher's. I would vote to use another one to try to not drop. I would vote that we should only use one Burrell. I would agree with that, yeah. Okay. Then I no longer have concentration. I'm still just going to back up and cast Frostbite on him. Okay. So that's a con 16 saving throw on your end. Con 16.

We have 14. So we'll take 2d6, and then on his next weapon attack, he will be disadvantaged. Okay.

Three points of damage. Three points of damage. Cold damage, if it matters. Cold damage, it does. So as this frosty magic washes over him, it begins to cover his arms as it cracks and he's vulnerable to cold damage, so he's gonna take a lot of damage and he's slow now with the frostbite. With that, it is Iris' turn. I am going to... Tell me, darling, how are you feeling?

I'm really tired all of a sudden, and I'm pretty weak. On a scale of 1 to how many hit points you have? On a scale of 1 to 92, I'm about a quarter of the way, I only have like 25% of my hit points left. I'm going to look out at him and I'm going to use life transference.

What does that do? And I am going to sacrifice some of my health to give him healing. Fuck. And I'm doing it at a third level. That's really nice. And you may continue. That's all I'm doing, so I'll roll for it. So, uh, you...

You channel that and you see this dark energy seep out of Iris and it shoots across the ground and empties in your toe and you feel your wounds close up. With that, it is going to be their turn. The one ape is going to- Do you take 16 points of healing? Fuck yeah. The one ape is feeling incredibly-

encumbered by this magic and it's going to turn to you, Caprice, as the one that did that to him. Okay. He has to be in range.

He takes an attack of nothing from Amanda. Attack of opportunity. As he's going to swing forward, he pulls out this club. As he tries to crack it, and he's going to get a four, and he misses. As he's going to lumber forward and make an instant do. And for my bonus action, I wanted to drink one of my greater healing potions. You down a healing potion. And with that, he's going to hit you for a 23.

to hit. And with that, it is...

How much fire damage? Eight points of fire damage. And make a con saving throw, please. Okay, I have to make two because I have to see if I maintain concentration. This is just for your effect first. Yep. That's going to be an 18? 18. Yeah, it's trying to grapple you and you manage to force its arms out. Oh, okay. Con? Wow. All right, here's my concentration check. Huh? Was that sorry? Sorry.

I made a constitution favor throw from his attempt to grapple me. Or strength. And you need to do damage to me, by the way. I rolled a natural 15. Natural 15, yep, that passes. Six points of fire. And my ability to concentrate on slow...

is going to continue. Okay. Uh, and so with that, uh, it's gonna continue, and, uh, you took the fire damage, okay. It is not able to grapple you. With this, it has, uh, the other one has Herja's, uh, grappled, and it is going to use half of its movement to stand up, carrying Herja, uh,

with him as he then carries her and steps forward and slams her down into the lava. - Oh fuck. - As-- - Into this one? - No, that one's all done. That one closed, the one that died, that one in the middle is closed off. - Oh cool. - It's hardened over. - Oh. - With that it is going to-- - So then he's going this way? - Yep. As he slammed into it,

And it's still kind of cooling, because it's just bubbling up, it seems to be connected to the life force of this ape. You're gonna take... That's gonna be a lot of damage. Eh, it's not that bad. It's a lot of damage. Wait, did he move out of my range? Uh, he would have, yeah. Yeah, give him a boop. Shabooby!

That's probably not gonna hit. 14. 17 points of fire damage. As you sink, as you then start to sink into the lava, make a, uh, no, and then you start to sink into it, and you are now restrained, as well as grappled. And with that, and did you get your opportunity to die? 14. 14 is not, because he's not slowed. He's not slowed, yeah. And he smashes her in, and that's his action. Feel the trap.

Oh, so that can't be right. What's his face's turn? Umlanda. Umlanda and then... Schmittr Shark. And with that, he is going to... Have you taken damage? He's going to walk over to you because this ape ran past him and he has his focus. So he has him going, he's going to place his hand like, well, you need some healing friends and he heals you for...

Six points of healing. And with that, it is... Shark's turn. Oh, thanks, friend. Shark is going to swim as a shark does, you know. He's gonna nice and narrow and swim through this path. That's fine. He can slither on by. It's totally Jawsome! It's totally Jawsome. He can change his speed so he can walk 30 feet. Hey, Wiley. What's up? What's up, Wiley? Oh, hey! Two and a half. Okay.

Sorry. You can easily get... Welcome. Oh shit, I should have told him this was unimportant. So...

So, three, four and a half. Ooh, no, he can't actually get there. So he's just gonna get there. Okay. He can't? He can't get on top of his space. I was trying to get on top. Well, let's see if it recharges first and then. That'll be relevant later. It does. Okay. But I can't use it. I don't think. Well, it has to be... Yep. We only have 30 movement. We only have 30 movement.

He's 90 in the water. So he's just gonna make two slam attacks. Okay. So we're gonna do... That's gonna hit. And... 19 hits? 19 hits, yeah. Okay, so both hit. So it's gonna be 2d8 each. Wow. Okay. Damn. Ready? 7...

9, 10, 11... 8, 9, 10, 11... So 15 bloodling damage for the first one. Okay. And 14 damage for the second one.

As the shark swims through the air and just chomps and chomps and the water hits him. It's not enough to really splash or do cold damage, but it's hitting him as his arm is starting to harden and crack. As he's looking, he's spilling out of lava for sure. With that, it is Bruce's turn. You're tired and horrible. I'm totally fucked. You're totally fucked. Okay. And bloody.

But he's away from me, so at least... Oh, does he do fire damage to him? Oh yeah, he does. Does the fire effect seem like a magical effect to me? Yeah. I think two fire damage? Yep. Everyone's taking an aura of fire. An aura of fire damage at the beginning of each of their turns. And Caprice, you'll take five fire damage right now.

Oh, right now? Yeah. But I'll just have it because you're a tiefling. Yeah, I'll take two. Hey, Wily. That's fine. Which means that I need to maintain concentration. And I do. I wanted a personal welcome to Wily. I will... Well, the fire damage is annoying, but not game-ending. I'm sorry, Choa. I'm alright! I'm okay!

I'll continue to sing and maybe not fuck up this song as much as I did the first time. Let's see. I just gotta, I just gotta know. Was that an outcropping or a cave? I just gotta, I just gotta know. How many wolves are in a wolf pack anyways? You can be as gentle as the sea. And was that a metaphor or an analogy? Yo, hey.

man you belong on a riptide I'm so glad you're by our side you're our favorite barbarian Toa when you're not swinging that maul man I hope that you understand it's okay to get the words wrong and I'll uh

I'll use the spell magic on him using my bow, so that's a once a day effect to try and end the fire. As you finish singing and you play a few notes on your violin and

it washes over him and suddenly this radiating molten heat that comes out from him suddenly sucks back in and the effect has been totally dispelled. - Okay, I've dispelled that and I have inspired you Toa with my bonus action. So you have two of those now.

they stack that's right i was saving them okay i got two of them i'm gonna make a little note here toe you're up um i'm gonna get you but cute you just i need i need a second i need a second i'm waiting to uh and i'll check them i'm waiting that's my turn okay uh that's his turn and he is going to with the witchicult we'll see if he uh he does not recharge at

His first attack is disadvantage. That's right. It is. So he is going to... Let's see if he retards that, too. Nope. So he does not have that ability, either. So his magical flamey thing is gone? It's gone. Yeah. He is going to... Notice that it's been cooled, and he's going to walk around your fire elemental, or the water elemental, and get in between you and go up to your toe. Uh-oh. Oh, no!

Can we just read haste real quick? It says you literally can't do anything. No, I know, but I want to make sure. Are you incapacitated right now? No, you're not incapacitated. It just says when the spell ends, the target can't move or take actions until the end of this turn. You don't have, as a wave of lethargy seems to have, you don't have status. Oh, so I'm going to lose prone. Well, you owe me prone because he knocked you prone. Okay. Yes. Can he take reaction? But I couldn't use my movement to get up. Right. So I'm still prone. So the argument says that you can't move.

I don't know if that counts as using. - Yeah, it would. - But I believe I can't use movement. I can't even have my movement to even get up. - So you're pro. - So I am currently pro. - So he is going to, he's going to do the same trick. - He's had me five times. - He's disadvantaged though, however. - For the first one. - For the first one. - So he's normal. - He's normal. - He's advantaged. - And that misses. As he smashes in, although you're exhausted, you manage to just heave yourself out of the way real quick. The next two are advantaged. - Yep. - Okay.

That is gonna hit as he smashes into you and I'll do bludgeoning first. Seven points of bludgeoning damage.

And two points of fire damage. Because that thing didn't recharge. Yeah, so he has two things that can recharge. So basically the burst can't recharge and then his crazy Giga Punch can't recharge. Giga Punch. But then he's going to grab both of his arms together and smash you down and try to just keep you into the ground at advantage. And that is going to hit. He smashes into you and with that, that is going to deal a good amount of damage. That's

That's gonna be 2d6 bludgeoning. Uh... 8 points of bludgeoning. And then fire. We need some more d6s. Fuck. 12 points of fire damage. I am going to use my... Stone's Endurance. Stay down, Teva! And... reduce that by...

So, nice. What's 12 minus eight, four? Yep. Lifty, you're up. You're alive. I'm going to rush up to Hersha. Hersha, you silly goose. Get out of there. And I'm going to use my action to try to pull her out of the wall. Make an athletics check, please. Thanks, Lifty. This wasn't the kind of pool party I was...

- DC 15. - DC 15. - Would you say athletics? - Athletics 15 is the DC. - There you go. - Fuck me. - He dunked me just like summer last year. - That does not pass. - Okay, so you try to heave Herza. She's down in the waist. It's burning her, however a lot of it's cooling, so it's doing damage but not completely obliterating her. You grab her arm and you heave and you heave, but you're not strong enough as this massive flaming lava eight is still grappling her. - I'm gonna use my bonus action to take the dodge action with a T point.

And then you channel your training and you hold up your spoon ready to dodge. Hershey, you're up. You're going to take... You're really sick. You're going to take... Hold on.

Oh, I should have done that. I did not know that was a thing. Get down with the thickness. Get down with the thick-- you're like seven points of fire damage starting your turn in the lava. I'm going to have to use that. OK, your turn. It's like one of like dodge action. There's also like-- Oh, I didn't hear that. Someone needs help. He is inspired. Totally fine. Sorry, dude. No, no, you're totally-- So I took the damage. I can use my action to try and break the grapple. Yep.

Also, you can try to break the grapple and the restrain all at once. Just as like a full, like, heat yourself out. And that's an athletic? That's an athletic, yeah. Okay, so athletic. Uh, counter-flex, yeah. Uh, oof.

- I would be a 10. - A 10. - Or an 11, should I use a-- - Let's use it, we got 20 of them. - Okay. - Might as well. - I'll check, well I'm not taking one out because now we're-- - It's not like the bones itself will start trying to kill us. - That's a little bit better, 17. - 17, yes, you barely managed to, you burst out, knocking the eight back.

Peeping yourself out of the lava, and you manage to get one... You can move one token, or one movement towards me. Oh, perfect. Away from the... Yeah. Yep. Oh my god. Out of the lava. You pee yourself up. I was pulling that in there, and that was my action to do that? Um... Shit, man. Blah, blah, blah, blah. I have one. Uh... I'm going to...

Use my bonus action to take my only healing potion. You chug the healing potion. And with that, it's Felix's turn. I'm going to move 5, 10, 15 and hit this guy with another Frostbite. Con 16 on your end. You've got to be fucking kidding. Yeah, that horribly fails. Another three points of shitty-ass cold damage. Another three, so six points of cold damage as it starts to harden and get further and further. My rolls have been so bad.

Okay, with that it is Iris' turn. I am going to reach over and I'm gonna touch Toa and I'm gonna cast Cure Wounds at 4th level. Oh, shabby zowie. Look at that. Holy fuck. That's good. A warm, sandy aura of magic washes over you, Toa, and your wounds start to close off. It gets everywhere. Reminds me of home. That's nice. It's nice. It's very nice. Thank you.

19. Damn! I fucking dig it. Okay. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you. With that, the apes are just gonna, one's gonna try to grapple Caprice.

I'm not bloody Aaron. Get a nine and you're able to dodge out of the way. And this one is going to step forward and let's see, it's fuming vigorously. It's been getting beaten up by Lufty. It's gonna, let's see, I'm gonna just roll and see who it attacks. It's gonna go for Lufty. As it runs forward, it's going to slam. This one? Disadvantaged. Oh, disadvantaged, correct. She took the dodge action.

Oh yeah, wait. I forgot about that. I was talking about my other thing. Oh, okay. What does the dodge do? Disadvantage on all attacks until... An advantage on deck saving throws. Disadvantage is 13 plus 5, so 18 to hit. Oh shit. It smashes... Is that it? Yeah. It smashes into you, dealing a bit of damage here. So I can't do double disadvantage here where I try to impose protection because it's too fast? Yeah, because I would have been double disadvantaged anyway. Wow. Seven points of fire damage and a strength saving throw.

as it smashes into you and tries to grapple. 16. 16 passes. As it tries to grapple you, you manage to wriggle your way out and leap out, and that is their turn. With that, it is... He's so clean! It is, whatchacallits, turn, as he is going to the, "How does everyone look?"

I'm hanging in there! Noon, you're fine buddy, go help someone else. I'm barely not bloodied. He's gonna move within 30 feet of Toa. Hojo, you okay? I can smell your singe. Yeah, now I smell your word. I just never want to be my friend. And he's going to call out like, "You'll be fine." And a healing word. Six points of healing.

And he's then gonna step over and pull out his club and try to boop the dude. Oh, he does have a club. And with that, he has his club. We'll see if he has. He does not. As he, so he's like, oh, I swear I'm better than this. Okay. I meant Jamothy or whatever her name was. With that, it's Shark Jones. Shark Jones is going to

Give him an old chompy bite. He's going to go up here. He's going to get on his face. He's going to get on top of his face. Yep.

Did he take cold damage from that? He does. Okay, so it's 1d6? 1d6 and then I'll obviously double it. One. One, so two. Welcome to the book. As the lava starts to cool a little bit, as the shark elemental. Did you say lavaster? Like a lobster made of lava? Exactly right. A lavaster. It's a water shark versus lava lobster. I love that movie. He's going to then jump and he melts. Tries to swallow him whole.

He's gonna use whelm. Okay, so DC 15 strength. Oh wow Wowie zowie no way. He gets a 13. That fails so he takes So average damage he takes nine bludgeoning damage and it's grappled. Okay. It's not cold damage? No. Damn. I don't know what this music is but I like it.

So then the shark, as the shark grapples him and chomps down and it pierces into him as his lava's starting to cool and he's slowing down a little bit. Two and a half. So what he's going to do is then he's going to turn around and he's going to swim

He's gonna make one more square. So he's gonna pull him, he's gonna drag him this way. Oh, 'cause he's like, he's gradual. He's, yeah, inside the Water Elemental. You see him floating, his eyes are glaring at you, Toa. Are we able to attack the guy? He won't hurt the Water Elemental? No. I don't want to. You should be, oh, I don't mean to- No, he can like, shloop and, you know, it's like nanobots. They can dodge. Okay, that's it. With that, it's Caprice's turn. I'm still singing, but I'm not gonna do anything super fucky.

Yeah, I guess I'll just try to rapier this guy. Did I tell you 9 damage or you said 9 bludgeoning? He takes an extra 4. Yeah, I hit. 27 to hit. I'm going to attack the one that's right in front of me, obviously. And, oh, wow. 13 piercing damage. Number 3. You stab in with your rapier. It cracks a lot of the volcanic rock.

Yeah, I stab him, I'm still singing, hey man, you belong on a riptide, and then that'll be my turn. Okay, with that, it is a... Toaster? A toaster. Oh, already? Wow. I'm just gonna run right up to him and say, um...

You may have fire on your side, but I've got a really cool gigantic water shark on my side! And I will attack him recklessly. I'm not hasted, so twice. So that first one hits.

The second one's a nine for 20. Nice! One, two, three, four, five, six. Yeah, I think I'm gonna die then. Nuba says, get shit on, nerd. And he sounds just like that. 20, 23, 24, 25.

37 bludgeoning damage. 37 bludgeoning damage. Smashing, smashing. 37. Holy fuck. Smashing. Smashing. Smashing. Smashing.

I don't think I'm an Erikel Thorin character. As you start... As the Water Elemental is easily moving out of the way of its body, as you're smashing in, as Makuchu is being grappled and held aloft, and he's trying to speak, he's like... Get shit on, nerd. Yeah, he's getting smashed. And with that, how can he get out? Is it a full action? So I'm going to pop back over to Mr. Water Elemental Jones here.

Is he able to just get you out of the thing? He's restrained. Unable to breathe. And... A creature within five feet of the element will then pull a creature out. Oh, shit. Hold on. The target is...

So hold on, so each creature within this space, on a failure they take damage, if it's large or small, it's also grappled. It says the escape DC is 14. Yeah, so that's either athletics or acrobatics. So he's gonna take some more damage, roll a d6, because he's starting his turn on the water elemental. Six? Six, so 12, Jesus Christ. As the water is... Shitload of life. Whatchacallit, yep.

He's blessed by a horrific volcano god. Clearly. Must be nice. It must be nice. It must be nice. I wonder if Tiki Bro is taking job applications.

I always wanted to have new jobs in horrible places. Just keep mobs in shows. And with that, he is going to look at you and he just doesn't care. He's full of fiery hatred as he recharges his crazy Bojangles bullshit. Did he break out? No, no, he's just gonna do it. He's grappled, right? He's gonna punch out. So he's disadvantaged, but advantage against me, so it's normal. So we're gonna get five. I'm just gonna roll a five.

He's just punching out like through the elementals. Yep. Jesus. Oh, it seems like it binds to Sen right next to him. Natural 20. No, it's not. It's not. So that's a 27. Denied, bitch. 23. 18. Yeah. 18. 17. Yeah. And then that hits. So four are going to hit. So it's all just normal. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Very good. Very good.

And so with that, he's gonna do a lot of damage. So I'll roll all the bludgeoning first. Please do. I'm my god, I'm my god. Nah, you're alright. We believe in you.

I've never been more ill-prepared for a session spell-wise in my entire life. 17. What did you take? I fucked everything out, all right? Nothing good? I just don't want to talk about it, really. 34 points of bludgeoning damage. Jesus! I did 17 of that, so that's good. Oh, God.

Are you awake? Yeah, I'm awake. It'd be fucked up if you could tank like that. I got a few shield from Iris. The fire damage though. And then it's gonna deal, oh wow, roll like shit. 13 points of fire damage. You're alright, you're golden. And you need to make a constitution saving throw. He's still very strong looking too. The last one smashes you in the face as his gauntlet ignites as soon as he punches out.

The con saving throw is 18. 18, that passes. So what was the max damage of... None of the individual hits were over 20, were they? No. Okay. I'm so dumb. With that, it is...

It is lifting. In there. I'm going to continue to turn towards number one and say, liar, liar, pants on fire. And I'm going to just whack him with a spoon twice, kind of aim it for the knees, and then just kick him also in the knees. Okay.

So where are you hitting him? In the knees. In the knees. So that is 17, yeah, and 16 both hit, and third one. Ooh, nice. And that hit. They will fire Ocelots. You know, I'm getting real tired of the Ocelot joke around here. Well, unfortunately, they're not going anywhere, Derek.

25. Someone else will do some stupid damage to get all of our iris. They might even pull a Vandross, so to speak. I've been rolling lots of 90/20s. I love when Vandross does a Vandross Vandross. So you smash in and it's looking incredibly weak. It's struggling to maintain its form as it's and lava's pouring out of it. Persia kills this thing. I'm bored with it. Persia, you're up. Me poor.

God damn it. You got me fried here. Hotter than a goddamn cheese curd. I'm going to fucking bonus action and knock you prone. 15. God damn it. 15 against what? Oh, a contest. 15 against the ape.

Fire it, Dan. I believe fire off. 13. Yes! 13. Fuck you! I'm gonna smack it with Dakota. You smash it down. Yes, girl. Gotta give up. Gotta give up. I am going to... Okay, so this is...

- 11 plus... - 11. - 13 points of bludgeoning. - 13 points is number one? - One, yeah. - It smashes down and your flail completely just shatters it. - Okay, great. - It's like volcanic rock all over as the lava pool cools and hardens, no longer channeling the heating power of that elemental. - Fuck yeah. - I'm gonna turn around and just go, "Aah!" And start running and barreling towards the lava pool.

What's his name? Makutu. Ah, Mamafutu, I'm coming after you! Mamafutu. Mamafutu. Oh, you're going after Makutu? Yeah. He's still alive, though? Yeah. Just you, Matt and Bear, without me. So is he going to take an opportunity attack? No, he's dead. No, he died. Oh, I thought you meant Makutu. Of course Makutu's alive. Yeah.

um and yeah i'll stay right here so that's iris isn't 10 feet of me and then i will you're advantage on him because he's i am okay great he's just swimming uh seven plus two so that'll be um

Nine points of bludgeoning, and then I'm going to pump a second level Divine Smite into this. Fucking double all those dice, baby. Which will be 66, because it's 2d6 normally three. So yeah, I can still crit off of a Divine Smite and do 66 Radiant. Damn. That's what you do with a Paladin Smite. So it's 3d6 normally? You just save it until you're 20. 3d6 normally at second level, yeah. Remember Matthias' crit box? Never got to use that shit, but it would have been... 14? It was like average. Yeah.

What? 22 points of radiant damage. 22 points of damage, okay. And that's my turn. As you smash into it, you see chunks of volcanic rock fly out of the water elemental. Can you roll a d20 for me and see if you can get that one in 8000?

For an empathy. Natural 1. Oh! The opposite of what I wanted. The opposite. Okay, field drop. I'm just gonna Frawl's Bite him again. Okay. Con D is 16 on your end. He gets a 22. Okay, so he just takes one D6. As he resists it. Hey, 5 points of damage. 5 points of damage. So yeah, that's 10 points of damage. Finally, I rolled more than a 3. Yay! Yay!

I have potent cantrip. Oh, cool. That's great. So normally he wouldn't, but at a certain level, even if they dodge my cantrip, they take half. Oh, that's great. So half of five. Well, no, I'm saying they take half of the number of dice. So normally it's two dice. So theoretically you would roll both dice and then do a half.

It says here that if he fails, they only take one. One die. Oh, is that what it says? Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, great. On a failed save, the target takes 1d6 pull damage. Oh, he still has disadvantage. That's on a failed save. Oh, I'm sorry. Give me one second. I'll show you. Continue. I'll correct you if it's different. He gets icy, but inside the water elemental. With that, it is...

His turn. As he is going to... Oh, yeah, sorry. So I screwed this up last time. Rave and Feebleman, I actually roll an attack roll against them. Oh, okay. And then at the end of their turn, they get to roll their save. Okay. I don't know how you want to do that because it wasted my spell slaughter because I fucked that up. It just doesn't happen, but I was going to do that again. So...

Okay. Yeah, it fails. Wait, so what's the... So the first time I cast Raven Feeblemint, I did it wrong. So I had him roll a con save, but I was supposed to roll a tack roll. And it hits, and then at the end of his turn, he rolls a con save to see if he can shrug it off every round for a minute. Oh, wow. So it was actually... He hasn't been in Feeble this whole time, has he? Well, no, because I had him... Into the fall of Korya. Jinx?

Because you had him con save instead of it being attack roll first. It would have been much easier for it to happen on an attack roll because I have a plus eight to my attack roll. It would have lasted at least a turn, right? So what are you going to do? Yeah, I mean, that's what level 12 is in. It's the second level 12. Oh, yeah, that's fine. Sounds good. Uh...

Spined by me. With that, it is monster's two turn. He did not grapple you, so he's going to make an attack on you. That is going to be a 22. And he's going to deal some fire damage. Wow. Three plus eight points of fire damage and make a strength saving throw, please.

Alright, here comes a Spring Saving Throw. That's off. That's gonna be a 12. 12. Okay. You... Unfortunately, you get grappled in and you're gonna take additional... Let's see if I maintain concentration. I do. I take 8 more points of fire damage.

Okay. With that, it is Wichit Cult's turn, as he is going to try to help you and pull you out. And he succeeds. He yanks you out of the grapple. I've got you, friend. And he pulls you out. And with that, it is Shark's turn. So, at the start, because he didn't try to get out, he's in me, so he's going to take a whole bunch of bludgeoning damage. Okay. Which is...

14 bludgeoning damage. - Okay. - And then, he is going, I'm assuming he can still slam while he's inside of him, right? - I believe so, yeah. - So he's just gonna kinda like constrict him twice. - Flex his pets. - Miss. 20 to hit. - Yep. - Okay. Why does he slam? Eight, nine, 10. - Did you miss any of those that you could have inspired yourself with? You have two. - It's the water I'm not too much of a fan of. So 14 damage. - Okay.

And then does he do an extra damage to die because of his water versus fire? No. No, he just takes it at the beginning of his turn. Got it. So, yeah, undyne. It constricts him and he manages to shrug it off. He's just and he is very angry. With that, it is Capricci's turn. Capricci. Oh, Capricci. No problem, I'm just gonna hang out right here and think about my options.

What are your options, Caprice? Well, I could try and shatter this guy. That'd be kind of neat. Shatter? Right? Shatter. That means he poops himself. Shatter. Is that what it does? He shattered his pants. It's a constitution saving throw. DC 37. Um...

Yeah, that's the brown note. It's a second level spell. It's a ranged touch. And... Yeah, I'll shatter him. I mean, what else do I have to do? I could try polymorphing the dude. Do you want me to polymorph the dude? It seems like you're fighting. I mean...

I can't say anything, I'm all the way over here. Ah, fuck. Alright. Okay. Alright, so I'll just keep singing "Hey, man!" and then I'm going to attempt to shatter the dude. Oh, I have that in front of me. The elemental? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's pretty fucking good, Derek. It's fine. It's fine. I... yeah. No, this is a good spell. It's a great spell. A saving throw? He makes a constitution saving throw.

The elemental will roll. He's disadvantaged though. Oh. Why? Oh, because he's made of an organic material. Stone, crystal, or metal. What? Yeah. Number three is that turn. Metastone. So, what is it? DC 16. Ah, fails. Eight plus five is 13, plus three is 16 points of thunder damage he takes.

Okay. And if he has any non-magical objects that he's wearing or carrying, they also take that damage. Okay, so you strum a power chord on your violin and as you see the rock start to just fly out. I like to think of the audible range of hearing and I'm doing like the...

Like that, like, very hard- That really high-pitched, uh, momenta. That's what I do, but only he can hear it, and he explodes horribly. Damn. Okay. With that, it is, uh, Toad's turn. Um... Okay. I will attack him... twice. He's restrained, so I'm advantaged.

Oh, it should have been a damage on the water element. Yep, hits. Hits. So I'm going to... Okay, so... Are you exhausted? No, no, that was a while ago. Okay. That was a couple times ago. So sorry, so 10, 16, 26...

So 30 bludgeoning damage. 30 bludgeoning damage.

So you are smashing in and smashing in and smashing in. Bits of his molten, rocky exterior are flying off of him. You smash into his chest. It looks like it gets torn open. The lava is pouring out as it's cooling. He's looking absurdly, absurdly weak.

And is that it? Is that your turn? Oh, hold on. Makutu is looking weak. Yeah. Oh, right. Like, very weak. Um, let's see if we can get some traits here. Um...

I am going to just check a healing potion. Okay, you down a healing potion. And he is going to, as... Regular? Just regular, yeah. As it's his turn, the chill from the water elemental, because it continues to cool him, he looks like he can barely take... Wow. He can barely move as he's going to look around and he's going to try to use that to try to get out. Did you roll the damage on that? What? Yes, I did. Okay.

and he's gonna successfully escape. And as he burst out of the water elemental, he looks at you and he is covered in this bubbling lava. There's a dark molten stone moving around all over him. His eyes are flaring as his feet are heating up. And he says,

It is too late, Oa. The Windbenders already have them. The Aarakocra will make nice use of them. I have fire and earth and then I will have water and air. They know you're here. Who? Where?

They will be coming! And suddenly he then, lava pools up at his feet and he shoots down into the earth. As the earth opens up and he slides down. What? No. It's his movement. As he slides down. Can I try to react and throw my

- Make an opportunity attack. - Oh, do, I'm right next to him, so I could too. - Yeah. - When you hit, he slides, you mean he's sinking like down? - Yeah, into the earth. - Nice! - Gotta give it up. - Not that it would make a difference. - Freeze. - 11. - 18 damage? - 18 damage. Okay. - Does an 18 hit? - It does. - All right, so he's gonna take 10 points of bludgeoning and then I'm gonna pour another second level divine smite into this.

- Wait, your turn. - She's using the reaction. - Oh, the reaction.

14 points of radiant, 10 points of bludgeoning. Okay. So you are smacked into him and you see half of his jaw get completely smashed off by both of you and he's continuing to slide down into the earth very, very, very, very weakened and the earth cools and there's nothing but a hole of volcanic rock. His hand as it passes down is lava. And we

And with that, the magic, the massive lava ape cools and shatters and the lava pool hardens over. Oh, shit. No! God damn it! Did I do that? Was that my shatter? He's gone. Where did he go? I start pounding at the ground and trying to like...

I'll brood as much of the cooling lava as possible and dig my way to him if I can. I'm sorry, buddy. I share a polymorph from when I have the chance. I'm sorry, too. I feel like I wasn't able to help you at all. No, it's all right. I wanted to say, I want to look him in the eyes and say, you may still be stronger than me, but I have friends. But the opportunity never came up, so...

I have the feeling that we'll probably see him again. That would really have been sweet. Save it. So he's up to even more than just... He's not just a dick. He's evil. He's an evil dick. He's working for the volcano god.

That doesn't sound like a good thing. No, it's not a good thing at all. No, it doesn't sound like a good thing at all. But maybe that's better than him working for Baphomet. Because I thought he was going to say Baphomet when he opened his mouth and I was really worried. He's Mako too, but you'll always be number one.

So I'm a coup one. Yeah. Yeah, he's a coup two. That's right. That's right. That's right. You're one of a kind. That was very strong though. Whoa, whoa, whoa. He beat the shit out of me. I cast Cure Wounds at third level on him. I'm going to be honest, watching that happen, I'm really glad that he didn't even look my direction. That was pretty intense. It was quite a duel and I'm glad that all of you were there to help me.

And, um, Mr. Sharky, I'll think of a better name for you later, but thank you so much. And I'm gonna kind of, like, pet him. Does Mr. Sharky not get an opportunity attack either? Uh... I guess he didn't. He's too stupid to realize that. You take 16 healing. Thank you. Um, well, I don't feel so bloodied anymore, but...

But is he really, really gone? And I want to get on all fours and put my ear up against the cooling. Make a perception check.

19. 19. As you put your ear to the ground, you hear a rumbling deep beneath the earth as it gets softer and softer and seems to get further away and further away as the rumbling dissipates. I think he's gone. I don't like saying that. Well, stay there and check again.

Okay, I just go further down on the ground. And, uh... No, no, with a 20, he's definitely gone. And with that, you see Umanda step forward as he's... Did he say... Did he say... Windbenders? He did. He said, Windbenders, do you know anything about those? Those are the...

wind spirits, the... the... the... the... the Aero-mancers of the Okaxian court. The Wind Dukes? Not the Dukes, no. What Dukes? I don't know. Maybe I've researched you. I thought I heard Dukes, too. Yeah, I think it's the Wind Dukes. They're magic users that control the wind. Yes. And they use the spirits? They use wind spirits? They bend the wind to their will. Oh, so the Aero-Cobra, they are the wind benders. Yes, there's type of... type of the Okaxian.

It's one of their soldiers. So they have the wind spirits. Yeah. They must be imprisoning them. Yeah. Wow. That means we're in the right place. We're on the right path. I may have thought he could stop me, but he gave me the information I needed. That's right. And things can't get any worse today than they did after that, so that horrible feeling you had in your stomach is probably gone by now.

That has to have been the trouble that was ahead of us. Perhaps they were trying to... The wind spirits could somehow reach out to me and warn me that he was here. I'm glad you were all here to help me defeat him. Of course. At least temporarily. Anytime. I mean, you saved my life. It's the least I could do. Yeah, and you're like a really nice guy. Thank you. I would say he's a good guy.

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