Matinee Monday: The Master of Disguise LIVE!
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We saw Master of Disguise, so you know what that means! Hey everybody! Hey everybody!

We are thrilled to be back in New York at the Beacon Theater and a special thanks to MSG Live and the Beacon Theater for having us. We are so excited to be here. I am Tall John Shearer.

And we have a movie for you. The movie is Master of Disguise. It's a movie that has been requested so much since we have started this podcast, and now I understand why. If you take away the credits, it's a mere hour and eight minutes. What do you need to know? Data from Star Trek Next Generation is stealing all the world's

Most prized possessions? Question mark? And a fucking imbecile has to stop him. That's the overall premise. We'll get into all the other stuff in a little bit. I'm speechless. I'm absolutely speechless. And you know what? To help me regain that speech, I must introduce my co-host. Please welcome Mr. Jason Manzoukas!

What's up, jerks? What's up, Beacon Theater? What's up, Falcon? That's right. Those are my people. These are the animals that come to the Late Show. This city is horny. I've been walking around for two days. This city is horny. Wowie. Wowie, Paul. This movie is horny. This movie, I didn't know.

Some of you, you were like, oh yeah, for sure. I didn't know. I put this on today and I was like, hang on, man, this seems nuts. This whole thing is out of control. Every beat of this movie is undeniably, when faced with an option, takes the exact wrong choice. Every, it's consistent choice.

Every time it chooses the absolute wrong way to go. Jason, I would argue if this movie was in a room with two doors, it wouldn't be picking the wrong door. It would start digging. Yeah, it would drill a hole into it and start fucking a hole in the wall. No, you know why it wouldn't? No. It wouldn't because the movie doesn't have a dick.

Oh, I mean, I'm not saying the movie is sexual. It's not. I'm just saying it makes a choice that you couldn't even fathom. You're like, wait, maybe they dig. Maybe they'd open a door. No, no, they're going to drill a hole and fuck the wall. I'm not lying when I say I could spend, I could spend the next five hours only talking about the turtle club. Only, only, only talking about...

What is contained in those minutes? Because it's, honest to God, fucked up. Well, Jason, there's someone out here. She is my other amazing co-host. Please welcome June Diane Raphael. How are you, June? I'm okay. How are you? I'm well. June, first thoughts. Wow. So...

I honestly, I don't know where to begin. My first thought is I have never heard of this movie. I've never seen a poster for it. I don't know if it was banned or what happened to it. I would support it being banned. No, no, no. This needs to be out there. We need to know the depths that we can go into.

I mean, this movie is challenging. So here's what I will say. I want to start with the positive. Great. I would love to. Yeah. Here are the positives for me. I enjoy Dana Carvey. Love. Love. Love. I find him...

To be so sweet and so silly and so boyish and charming. I really am into him. Yes. I am. And actually, watching this movie, I felt a yearning for these insane movies of the late 90s and these comedies where people were really going for something. Right. You know, like, there

They're going for a certain type of comedy in big characters and I don't see that many comedians doing that anymore and I tip my hat to it. So there was something about that that I loved and that's period. I will fully back you and say this.

For me, Dana Carvey is, like, truly beloved. Delightful. That's a delightful man. He was one of my favorite, like, as a young person watching SNL, one of my favorite cast members. When he did the Dana Carvey sketch show, some of the people involved in that are in this. Dino Stantimatopoulos, I'm looking at you. There are... Those are...

those if you haven't seen there's a hulu documentary about uh the making of the dana carvey sketch show that is fantastic because it's a writer's room that has some of the you know it's like corel and colbert and dino and charlie kaufman and a lot of crazy people it's really a great room it was a prime time sketch show that was truly like should have been on like after conan o'brien it pushed the limits

It followed Home Improvement. And like the opening sketch was like Bill Clinton opens his shirt and he has teats like a like a that are lactating like a dog and they hand him puppies and the puppies suckle from his teats. That's the opening sketch of an 830 p.m. sketch show.

It was amazing. If you can imagine, they lost all sponsors. Immediately. I was at the live taping of one of those shows. That's how big of a fan I was of Dana Carvey. And still am. He's fantastically funny when he's on Howard Stern, when he's on this Netflix special. And in this movie. He is... I had some... I will say it right now, openly and honestly and vulnerably. I had...

Some laughs watching him in this movie. I truly did. Every time. Every single time Data farted, I laughed. Every time. It was funny. Guys, I'm here to say, farts are funny. Kids, get it. It was one of those jokes, Data farting, that really was like, did they just do that?

Will they do it again? Like, I really was happy. And it played out quite beautifully. It really did. His farts were so bad. I mean, he clearly has some sort of digestive tract problem. But it's related to him laughing. The laughing forces the farts out. Is that happening to you guys?

Maybe he is so loose his body is so loose. He's so at peace and joy that his asshole is finally like I think that absolutely happens. It's like when people laugh so hard they have to pee too Like my mother had a real problem where if she Where's this going? Well, it was actually specific to one movie. What about Bob which was my mom's favorite movie and

And we would rent it all the time, and she would laugh so hard that we would have to put towels underneath her. What? She would. What? By the way, don't watch the movie. No. That's the reason to watch the movie. Wear a diaper? No. Is anybody wearing a diaper tonight? Well, let's back it up. I mean, obviously. That person raised their hand. That person was like, are you really wearing a diaper? Maybe they're just me. People have medical conditions.

You've had children so you're wearing some sort of protection. You know what don't say listen don't start with listen Yeah, I understand that postpartum women should be wearing diapers. Yeah And they should be saying that I mean, that's just true Hey, listen, here's what I'm gonna say Even if you haven't had children ladies throw a diaper on what I'm saying knows what I'm talking about balconies live in that type life and

The idea that their name is the Disguises? The idea, the concept that they all have an Italian accent? The idea that Dana Carvey in the movie appears to be a 50-year-old man playing a 23-year-old?

And by the way, 23 seems older than how, like, Pistachio is... Pistachio Disguisey. Yes. Who does not know that he has a talent for disguises, even though his last name is Disguisey. Um...

Does not seem like a well human being. He seems like someone who might have been kicked in the head by a horse or maybe hit by a train. He's very stupid. This is, I mean, this is obviously, this is, I'm assuming, is this a riff on Inspector Gadget? Oh, Jason's. Right? No. I don't think it's. Oh, wait a minute. Hear me out. Because he's the...

Master of disguise who is good at disguises but terrible at actual investigative work because Jennifer Esposito does all of the actual investigative work. She is Penny. She's getting shit done. There's a dog. This movie is Inspector Gadget. I thought that was going to get a bigger response.

I wrote it down like, this is going to crush. That's what's troubling about the sort of world that we're dropped into and the lore of the Disguisees because I couldn't quite... I would like you to just say the name Pistachio Disguisee a lot. When I first heard his name, Pistachio, again, I'll say it proudly, I laughed.

I laugh. Is it so wrong? This movie is not afraid to go there. Oh, and it does. Does it ever. Here's the thing. It lives there. This movie doesn't go there. It lives there. Yeah, this movie never retreats. Look, this is a movie. This movie is doing something. This movie...

The idea that it's so... It gets there so quickly, and the idea that James Brolin is Bo Derek at the beginning... Legitimately funny. Does he, as Bo Derek, fuck Data from Star Trek? I feel like he must. Great question. I just want to back it up one more step before we even get into Bo Derek, and just say, when I think of Italian, I think of James Brolin. Yeah.

Like, you can't get more Italian than James Brolin and Edie McClurg. Those are some real Italian-accented people. I mean, and Dana Carvey is also aggressively not Italian. Why would Dana Carvey have an Italian accent if he's born in America?

And raised in America not even knowing of his true heritage. Well, I'll tell you this much. When I first heard that Italian accent, I thought, oh, no. We're in trouble. Oh, that's when you thought we're in trouble? That's when I thought we're in trouble. It grew on me.

If Dana Carvey wants to do an Italian accent, reverse engineer it so that he is Italian. Like, that doesn't... It's weird. Well, he is Italian. No, no, no. I mean, like, from Italy Italian. Well, he is from Italy Italian. No, his dad was. His grandfather... Oh, yeah, his grandfather. His grandfather was... I guess James Brolin is, too.

I mean, and by the way, we're talking about this Italian accent as if, like, Daniel Day-Lewis did it. It's not like a spot-on Italian accent. We're not like, oh, it's great. The Italian accent's great. It's just weird casting. No, it's like, hey, what day? I'm Italian. It's like Mario and Luigi level. Italian accent, like, it's Italian accent 101. They all sound like they're doing, like, Sandler's Italian accent. Yeah.

It feels to me like I've been transported into Tony and Tina's wedding. Like that level of like depth to Italian. Keep in mind when he is born, he is born able to talk and slap the doctor. And he talks as a baby in an Italian accent. So he is born a newborn child who speaks English with an Italian accent.

As if he's been raised in the little Italy of Toronto.

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I would say that the biggest mistake the movie makes in moment one of the hour and eight minute movie is, you know, you open up on Bo Derek, she's running, she's dressed like she was dressed in 10, you are watching this scene, but we never understand what she did, why she was there, we don't understand any context to that opening scene whatsoever.

The grandfather is giving us voiceover about how this is. And this is this. I laughed. There are much like June is saying and Paul, too. I laughed a lot in this dumb fucking movie. And when it is like Bo Derek is running away from the house and he says, this is my son. I was like, OK, OK, movie, you got me.

Bo Derek crushing it. She's great. The best person to rip off a face in a movie full of cameos. Odd cameos.

Very strange cameo. She really went for it. But, I mean, we don't ever know what she did. We know that she put Data in jail. Yes. They are the Disguisee family. Yes. Or some sort of independent intelligence organization. See, that's where I got really confused. Because they keep on referring to being a master of disguise and being Disguisees as...

as though they're... it's something we all know, like, "Oh, I'm a magician." Or like, "I'm James Bond. I'm a spy." "I'm a spy." But we have no... I mean, I didn't have any idea what does it mean to be a master of disguise? Do you have powers? Do you figure things out? Do you just do impressions? That's fine.

I just don't know. Here's the thing. First of all, it feels less of an Inspector Gadget movie and more of an Austin Powers ripoff without the backstory. Because Austin Powers, at least as a secret agent, we understand the world in which he exists. The disguises are also doing stuff, but at certain points...

The disguises can be so good that they literally are the person. Yes. And then sometimes so bad that they don't do any facial change at all. And then a majority of their characters are not people that they're impersonating, but just famous movie characters and characters, not actors. Yes. That's very true. I mean, I think...

Here's my question. Here's my main question. There's a main question you've got. There's a main one, and then there are several other smaller subsets. The main one is...

It hadn't been... If Mama Disguise and Papa Disguise... But Mama Disguise is not part of it, right? I know that. It's a patriarchal male lineage. Yes. Not passed over to the women. But, okay, so... By the way, I think she is, like, lucky her to not be burdened by this nightmare. But if they had not... If...

Mama and Papa had not been kidnapped. Would Dana, would Pistachio Disguise have ever been called to the art form and craft? I think I feel safe in saying he would have spent the rest of his life being best friends with an eight-year-old child.

I did not like that relationship. Not one bit. No, no, no. What do you mean? You mean a 50-year-old man befriending a young boy on a skateboard? Did not like it. Who he then plies with gifts?

And Shrek impressions? Oh, that Shrek impression was a straight up fuck you to Mike Myers. Yeah, what was happening there? You know what? He does the Shrek impression and the kid doesn't laugh. That was an indictment. That's the joke is like, see, Shrek isn't funny.

That was chilling. Oh, yeah. This movie is taking shots. And by the way, as a father, I know when my child falls down, the best thing to do is not to physically comfort them, but to do impressions of popular films. Well, here's the thing. Sometimes you might not know to do impressions of popular films. That's why it's great for a neighborhood guy to be like, hey, why don't you cheer him up by doing some of your weird voices?

This set that they are on, this street set that seemingly everything happens on, is so shitty. It's so shitty. I don't even know what world it lives in, but here's the Shrek impression. I couldn't help but notice that you became acquainted with the sidewalk a moment ago. I'm not a sports kid. Pistachio, why don't you do one of your funny voices and cheer the kid up?

What an excellent idea, Bernardo. Yes, yes. I do for you now a scene from the hit motion picture Shrek. You ready? Okay. Why don't you get away from me, donkey? What you talk about get away from you? I'm making waffles. By the way, that Eddie Murphy is bordering on offensive. This...

I mean, I would say it almost, it's got one foot over on the offensive side and one on the, I guess that's an impression. Well, let's be very clear. There's a lot of scenes in this movie that are really problematic. Problematic.

For a movie that I believe came out in 2002. This movie came out in the 2000s. If you told me this came out in 1991, I'd be like, okay, maybe. But this came out in 2002. If you told me this movie never came out and it was on Dana Carvey's shelf and he was embarrassed of it and it was only released after his death, I'd be like, yeah, sure, of course. The boy responds to the Shrek impression without any setup and goes, I never had a dad.

Exposition done like there was a checklist like like like he was coached off-screen like get in there and you drop that exposition no matter what don't worry about what anyone else is saying just give the Exposition got it go action. I never had a dad genuine question

For real. What's up? How old is Dana Carvey supposed to be? He is 47 in real life when he makes this movie. I did the math because I had to. So that I assumed. Yeah, I think from what I'm looking at, you guys are seeing the same thing. That looks like a 15-year-old character. No. I agree. June. I agree. What? No. He gets...

- I think this movie was supposed to be, I think this character was supposed to be a teenager.

Oh, no, no, no. Sit with it, Paul. Sit with it. Like, I really want you to think about it. All of the characters, the character's journey is being, he's discovering that he's been misled by his parents. He's basically like Harry Potter, who's been told that he's just a normal kid. And then later he gets a letter and is like, you are pistachio disguising.

You are the heir to the Disguisee lives. You are a master of disguise. You're a wizard. And you have the ability, the natural ability already. You didn't even know it was there. Now, let us help you get it. Gandalf, not Gandalf, Dumbledore shows up. Oh, my God. Dumbledore shows up in the form of the grandfather, and he's like, listen, I'm going to tell you what's up with the Disguisees.

We need to find the nest. So is he who should not be named Data? I don't know about that. I don't think it's a one-to-one, but I mean, I think... Because I know that Jennifer Esposito is definitely Hagrid. Wow. She has a line at one point that is literally, she says, I don't even know what to say about what happened back there.

That line is spoken in the movie as if to knowingly wink at the fact that we know that's what you just said to your seatmate while watching the movie. Jennifer Esposito is a breath of fresh. And I just, yeah, I don't know what she's been up to. And I'd like to find out because she is so cute.

I couldn't take my eyes off of her. It's always strange to me when someone's name in a movie is the same name as their own name in real life. Yes, her name is Jennifer Baker. Because I was like, when she is Jen or Jenny or whatever in the movie, I was like, ooh, this is so strange. Because she speaks for the audience, because she's the only normal person in a truly weird world, it seems to me as though I'm watching Jennifer Esposito...

be herself being like, what is this? It felt like they brought her in. I don't feel safe. It felt like they brought her in for a meeting to meet Dana Carvey about a project and they're like, roll on it. Roll on it. They bow fingered her hard. When she basically is like, oh, I didn't sign up to be like, to have to have sex with people on behalf of you.

The book says she does. The book that they have is like, you gotta fuck the bad guy. Here's the thing. Well, even her character, and I loved her, and I was so grateful she was there. But this idea that every disguisee has to have an assistant was strange because we've seen James Brolin without one. Right. Right.

But he's retired. Well, but even when he was, did he have an assistant when he was? I think, well, the grandfather, maybe the assistant was driving the car. Okay. I don't think it was established. It wasn't established. Look, the rules of the disguisee, we can all agree, are not established at all. I mean, the only thing that we know about the disguisees is this title card, which, June, do you want to read that?

Many centuries ago, a remarkable family began to practice the magical art of disguise. Can we stop there for a second? Sure. Okay. So, the magical art of disguise. The magical art of disguise. The magical art of disguise. For me, the word art is a problem.

I agree, because here's my issue, and there's only one. Dana Carvey, pistachio disguise-y, he has these gifts. It never gets old! His name is pistachio. There are actors in this movie who have to enter a scene and say, pistachio to Dana Carvey.

This is why this movie walks this fine line of being one of the worst films ever made and one of the funniest films ever put on celluloid. Okay, so Pistachio Disguisey already has... He's already...

He's already gifted at doing voices, right? Well, yes. He has a talent to do characters. Whenever he gets upset, he kind of hones in on somebody. But all of them have to do with his underwear being on his head? No, Jason. His teacher. Oh, my gosh. Someone in the audience has underwear on his head and a shaving cream beard. We appreciate that. So...

Right on. I'm nervous. So he has... I mean, we can all agree he has a talent for doing voices and mimicking voices and doing accents. So here's the problem with the magical art of disguise. He... Once he's given that special pop-up book, costumes, there's no real art to it all. He just...

has this gift and then does it with costumes on. Let's be clear. Only because within the context of this film, which is, I'm assuming, meant to start a franchise, he has not yet mastered the magical art of disguise.

But what is magical about it? That's my point. He's already doing these voices. The only thing he's doing, which is a practical experience, is putting on a costume. No. Where is the magic? He says, become another person, become another person, become another person, and he then becomes... Remember when he makes out with the cobra? First of all, stop screaming at me.

Remember when he makes out with the cobra? Yeah, of course I do. But that, my point, of course I do, Jason. But my point is that those voices that he's doing there, to me, were not very different from the voices we already saw him do. We've seen him already be able to, he has an incredible ear. Well, I don't, I would argue that. But I'm going to give you that to say, but you have to say that

To transform into a fully realized Bo Derek, that's magical. Like, that does not costume work. But then we see that it is costume work. They just rip off a costume. But it's still Bo Derek. Like, James Brolin is Bo Derek. Right. When Bo Derek is flying, because...

Because, I guess, the disguises have the power of flight? It is Bo Derek's body, but it is James Brolin, Barbra Streisand's husband.

Here's the thing. What the movie suggests is without being told... Wait a second. Barbara Streisand was at the premiere for this. She had to have gone to see Master of Disguise, I bet. I don't think they have it like that. No way. No way. No way. No fucking way does Barbara Streisand go to the premiere. Produce a picture. There's no way. Barbara Streisand is like...

You know James Brolin is like, you know, I've got the Dana Carvey premiere. And she's like, yeah, no. Yeah. No, not doing it. She's like, I'll be in one of my stores in the basement. I think that, here's what it is. So he is naturally gifted at voices. Yes, you're right. Because he doesn't know that he's a, he knows, obviously he's a disguise-y, but he doesn't know that he's a master of disguise. Right?

When the grandfather comes in, he says, it's all well and good to be able to do voices or dress up or whatever when he's dressed up as the Indian man. But he says, in order to know what the person knows, in order to have that, to truly become this character, you have to repeat the phrase, become another person. But he doesn't become another person.

He does. He starts quoting specific knowledge that that person knows. Yes. That's acting. I do it every fucking day. But he's not an actor in the movie. So June, you are saying that you are a disguise-y. I am. Are you a disguise-y? Cannoli disguise-y. That's the t-shirt. That's the t-shirt.

June's face, cannoli disguisi. That's the t-shirt. That is amazing. I would also pitch that we all three have a disguisi t-shirt. Each one of us. But cannoli disguisi is great. And I'll be pignoli disguisi.

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First of all, if he just said "Energico, energico, energico" it's so much better than "Become another person, become another person, become..." It seems like A, there's nothing Italian about that. B, it's... you're just laying out what you want. It's so weird. But I think when he did that transformation to the turtle, he became a turtle. Turtle. Turtle. Turtle. Turtle.

It did make me laugh. It made me laugh. When he bit the man's nose off, then spit it back on as if they were playing the game, I've got your nose, I put it back. And I guess snapping turtles rip off people's noses? Yes, but you know what happens then? You see into the cartilage and the space in their nose, blood pours out of their face. You know what it's not? Smooth skin.

Unless a turtle's bite is like a lightsaber and it cauterizes and does it all in one shot. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off. It's fine. It's not bloody all over the place. So, okay. And we'll move off of it. We don't need to spend all night on this. No, let's not move off of it ever. I mean, we've really only talked about the first ten minutes of the movie. But he's not...

So then I guess I would argue that Josh Brolin is really a master of disguise. Absolutely. And Dana Carvey is just really an apprentice. Yes. I thought the whole movie was going to be revealed that the grandpa disguise he was actually James Brolin. Me too. I was like, rip off your mask, old man. And then I was like, oh, I guess he's just an old man.

But I really was hoping... Wait, wait, really? Yeah, I thought that too. Why? He's the narrator of the movie. But you thought like he'd be like, and in greatest disguise of all, I'm Mike Myers. Like, you know, it was going to be like a real kind of a twist, fun ending. I mean, I don't know. I don't know what this movie is trying to do. It upsets me. Like, why is he practicing with the teeth in an apple?

Like, to understand how to work fake teeth? How does he produce a boat out of thin air when he becomes Robert Shaw's character from Jaws? There are so many questions. I mean, where are all these costumes living? When they go to that party, it seems like they're very far away from the Italian restaurant, but then he runs away in the cow shit suit, and it seems like he's right in front of the restaurant again. How does he get the

ghillie suit with a cow patty on it. Giant cow patty. That's where I assume magic comes into play? Yeah, where does he keep all that stuff? I don't know. In his portable nest? Is it all in that box, like Mary Poppins style? Oh yeah, like what was that orb? The orb that he talks to at one point, he goes, you idiot, I'm a holographic recorded message. But then they have a conversation.

Not unlike Superman 2, but I'm okay. But what was the orb? What was the suitcase? The suitcase is like a miniature laboratory. I thought the suitcase was where all of his disguises came out of. Well, here's the thing. When they discover in the attic James Brolin's nest, I also didn't like that it was called a nest.

That was gross. Unsettling. It was gross. I didn't like that. Because a nest is like, I don't know, dirty and like where you poop and stuff, I think. I thought that was weird. But this was called, the suitcase was called nest in a box. Right. Something like that.

And so it's a portable nest. So it has within it everything that's in the attic. And the Rube Goldberg machine to open the nest in the, if you walked up to the attic and you were like, well, there's string over there with a candle under it. There's a bunch of stuff. You'd be like, oh, there must be a way to do something here. Like it's, you wouldn't need all that. Is this movie aimed at six-year-olds?

I think this movie is for six-year-olds. I wrote down, is this a children's movie? And I don't quite know. Look, I know I probably speak out of both sides of my mouth here, but I love when Quentin Tarantino does revisionist history, like they kill Hitler and, you know, inglorious bastards. But when I see Abraham Lincoln dancing too, I like to move it, move it. I'm like, no, that's not my Lincoln. No.

By the way, they don't even make, they don't even justify it. He just dances to I Like to Move It, Move It. Oh, Dana Carvey plays that Abraham Lincoln. And by the way, that was a little inkling of what the Disguises did, which I liked. It was like, okay, so they come in and help out people. Are they a government force? I would have liked that.

That to be a through line, but it wasn't. There's no, that's my problem with the disguisees. They don't, they're not, I'm not clear on what they're motivated by beyond the joy of being in disguise. Yes.

I mean, they're like the A-team. If you need a disguise, we got one. No, that's what, like, it just seems like they are frustrated actors. And I can understand that, but let's call it what it is. Sell, sell everything in the nest and make an independent movie. Ha!

A bunch of people in the house talking about how they don't love everybody and they're having a midlife crisis and it'd be great. Can you imagine a world in which there is the FBI, the CIA, MI5, you know, like Mossad, every intelligence agency in the world.

And these fucking disguises are like, we operate independent and above all of you. These morons are running around being like, we got this. We got this. Listen, you know what I'm realizing is that that six-year-old is probably going to be primed

to become a disguising. Well, I mean, he's not blood. He gets adopted at the end, though. In the wedding ceremony, I believe he is given... They are saying, what's the phraseology? He becomes the son of Dana Carvey. Dana Carvey really wants a child throughout this whole movie. He wants to become the father of... He's pushing 50, so I get him wanting it. But...

But the weird thing is Jason's just going through a little something. That really hit home. Wow, that really landed for me.

By the way, what you're saying about the marriage is interesting, especially considering it's in the end credits, which has more footage than the film. There's so much happening. Characters we've never seen. Scenes we've never seen. By the way, I pulled this just to show it to you. This is a deleted scene with Captain America. And this is... And by the way...

Whoa!

It's all in a day's work for Capitan America. What's with the Italian accent, Capitan America? Well, you see, America is a big pot of melting people. Nice shield. You want to hold it? Now, you'll excuse me. Oh, please, please, don't slap me. You're my daddy. You're my daddy. If you insist. Wow, that was awesome.

And remember, kids, always stay in school. We will. Bye. Bye. He's pretty cool. You hit him with the claws of a fist. He didn't deserve his dignity, Papa. So that's the ending where the fart doesn't happen. I'll be honest. I just came. That was bizarre. Strange stuff. Also, who is that?

Does not look like Dana Carvey. That's not Dana Carvey. It's not Dana Carvey, but it's his voice, right? Oh. Again, that's where the master of disguise comes into play. He sometimes doesn't look. But at the end, when they go to, like, that resort, and they're getting data, James Brolin doesn't embody the other person. It's just James Brolin in makeup being the bodyguard. Remember that? Oh, yeah, at the end. Yes, yes, sorry. George Bush. Oh, yeah.

It really is like a series of sketches. And that's what made me feel like, oh, maybe this is just for children who will appreciate just silliness. But then I was like, no, because why would then it be that Dana Carvey is obsessed with women with big butts because that's what his mother has? And I was like, there's such a weird sexual component to the big butt stuff.

Then I was like, what's this now? And he, when they're interviewing Jennifer Esposito, Jennifer Esposito has a great sexual harassment case against both Dana Carvey and the grandfather just from the interview alone. The first question is, what are your measurements?

And then they were upset with her butt being too small. But you know what? It just goes to show you how much shit women will put up with to get good dental coverage. The fact they doubled down on that joke, that scene made me laugh. So, about the dental. That made me laugh. Do you pay for it? Do I invoice you? She doesn't even know how insurance works. This is crazy.

This is the other thing that I struggled with. No, she just wants dental work. She wants to get as much dental work done as quick as possible so she can quit. And she has great teeth, but it seems like she also wants to make sure her son is covered. Listen, as someone who had to get...

extensive dental work done after the age of 18 it can be pretty pricey okay so that's you would put up with pistachio and grandpa well I understand that she wants she wants to get it done for her her son while he's still under her coverage so here's here's the problem I have with the actual disguises or the art of disguise the magical art of disguise

There's no, because I think what would have been cool, and of course not in this movie, this movie doesn't support it, would be seeing these craftsmen and craftswomen slip into disguise and really fully embody these characters that he's playing to try to figure out this mystery could not be drawing more attention to themselves. Yeah.

They are absurd. They are screaming. They are loud. And sometimes they show up multiple times to the same location to talk to the same people. Like, he comes to that front door of that house three separate times in the space of minutes. But here's what I'm saying. He gets...

Nothing done. Jennifer Esposito finds every clue, figures everything out, does the whole case. He's actually a problem.

Jason, what is the case? You know that Data kidnapped his dad. Done. He doesn't, though. They live next door to Data, apparently. And it's all happening within the space of a block. There's no conspiracy. There's no nothing. The clue...

The clue is the cigar. Done. Mystery solved. The clue, the cigar brings us to the turtle club. They show the guy the cigar and he's like, oh yeah, I made that cigar for Data. And they're like, got it. Thank you. Every beat is like, boom. Okay, thanks so much. By the way, isn't it a better story

to be like, "This person is stealing all these amazing objects. We must stop him or we have to like trick it or we have to get it back." But no, that's kind of running parallel. Like he doesn't seem to care about any of the objects ultimately. And also the objects are weird. It's like the lunar module, Dorothy's ruby slippers, and the Constitution?

Give me, like, if that's an SAT question, I'm like, shit, stuff. I don't know. What is stuff? Like, I don't know. Do you think SATs work like Jeopardy? What is stuff? And your answer is, what is stuff? I mean, well, when I took my SATs, it was me, Ken Jennings, and someone, a computer programmer. Yeah, I did good. I mean, I did pretty good. I got to the second round.

I mean, there are, throughout the movie, there aren't just like moments of homage to other movies. There are indulgent homages to other movies. Indulgent? The Exorcist, the Jaws, Robert Shaw stuff. The Scarface stuff is absolutely insane. But wait, this is what makes me, this is what I'm thinking.

This movie was not meant to be a kids movie. It was meant to be an adult movie. They got in the edit room and they're like, switch it up. Because all the characters he's impersonating, like what six-year-old gets off on a Scarface impression in 2002? What six-year-old likes a good Robert Shaw monologue? You know, like what are we doing? The joke of that one is how often he calls him Chief.

Right? And it's like, okay. I mean, here are some of the Scarface things. Oh, yeah. We're going to party all night long. That's right. Have fun. Yes. Well, that's great. You have fun. I'm going to speak to someone. Say hello to my little friend. Don't touch. See that, my friend? That is a rare shrunken head right there. I'm a truck. He has a little friend who has a shrunken head.

He is dressed like... Can I ask you both a question? I need to ask you both a question. Do you think this is a Dana Carvey, like, passion project? He's like, oh, like, you know, Mike Myers, the whole idea was, like, he was saying, like, oh, behave. And his wife was like, that's a great idea. And she helped him create this character of, like, Austin Powers. Do you think that pistachio disguise he was, like, something Dana Carvey was, like, tooling around with? And he's like, oh, my God, this amazing world. And this is a thing.

No. I feel like we're just trying to back into a movie in which Dana Carvey can do a bunch of characters. Sketches. And that's fine. And I would see that movie. I have seen that movie. But I just saw that movie. You just did. Yeah. But yeah, there was just nothing to hang it all on. It was originally written for Jim Carrey. Jim Carrey passed on it.

It was written... This was written on a page? Yes. So the guy... Did the person who wrote it write it during a fever? Or a flu? Well, let me lay some of his... Or under duress in any way. Let me lay down some of his credits. They are Deuce Bigelow, male gigolo, without a paddle. Deuce Bigelow, European gigolo.

movie called Love Conquers Paul which I didn't get to audition for and I don't know why and it was directed by someone. Why would you audition for it John? And it was directed by a person who never directed anything but just had was a production designer so that's that. Yeah I mean this you know what this feels like to me like a bad attempt the Pink Panther films but those Peter Sellers like it's like

Because Peter Sellers is dumb in those movies. He's not super dumb, but he had funny disguises. But this is rough. Well, no, I mean, like, I do think that's what they're trying to do. And I'm not kidding when I say Inspector Gadget. I think Inspector Gadget is an homage to Inspector Clouseau. I think this is meant to be a not good... He's supposed to be bad, I think. I think he's not supposed to be... But the cherry pie costume was good. Yes, he is supposed to...

He's not supposed to be good at this or a master yet. But the problem I have is when he shows up as a turtle, when he shows up as a turtle, when he knows he has to go to the turtle club and chooses to show up as a turtle. As a physical embodiment of a turtle.

Churchill. Churchill. This is where we struggle with the rules of the world. This? This, just and only this. The rules of the world we've been dropped into without our consent. There's no way to, no matter how good of...

I think you're saying... A disguise you can come up with... Here's how it... I understand Energico to work like this. Become another person. Become another person. I am that other person. I don't think it's become another species.

Well, I mean, yeah. Let's watch a little of the turtle. But I will say, if a turtle were to morph into a person, then I think this is an accurate portrayal. Now, that being said, if a person turtle walked into the turtle club, categorically, everybody's going to lose their mind. Everybody there should be like, what the fuck?

What the fuck is going on right there? But you know what I think people would think? It would be like when you would see like, you know, some sort of a mascot, like, you know, like Mr. Met walking around Shea Stadium. You'd be like, oh, clearly.

clearly this person is affiliated. This is not like a person that is just out to see a ball game. Like, they've done some sort of like fun thing at the theater tonight. And that's where I feel like they took a wrong turn with his character because he is lovable and goofy and not so bright. But once we enter into the turtle club, like, this is not a man we're safe around. Longer.

He's very specifically over and over putting Jennifer Esposito, a single mom, in life-threatening danger. At one point, she is abducted from her home and her child is left alone. And he has to wander the streets of wherever they live.

Until he finds Pistachio Disguisey. The good news is they only, they only, they live in a world which is a city block, so like it would take four hours max to search every world. I do want to say that in the credits, they show the turtle producing an egg out of his mouth, a

a Pepto Bismol bottle out of his mouth. So yes, that's an art to produce an egg out of your mouth. Can I just play a little bit of Turtle? - He becomes a turtle! - Of course, babe. - Are you a member of the Turtle Club? - Well, not exactly. - Not exactly, but am I not turtley enough for the Turtle Club? - By the way, that's Kermit the Frog, right? That is not a turtle voice, that is a Kermit the Frog voice.

Is he wearing glasses because they're tortoiseshell? Maybe. I mean, because turtles don't wear glasses.

So he's not embodying a turtle, or is he a turtle man? I don't know. The eyeline they have looking at this gentleman, though, makes it seem like he's 30 feet tall. He's so big. By the way, why shoot him from below like this? Which is to say, I think they're actually trying to convince us Dana Carvey is the height of a turtle. I also think that this guy looks exactly like Jennifer Esposito's boyfriend.

Very much, yes. This guy is also dressed like he's in Double Dragon and is the red guy from Double Dragon. Oh, man. Do you think that Jennifer Esposito is better off with Pistachio over the other guy? Oh, yes. Of course, Paul. Pistachio has a lovely... I'm asking questions. I'm not making judgments.

I didn't know if anyone had a hot take on it. I don't know. I mean, maybe, you know, do you think that their sex life is going to be good? Pistachio and Jennifer Esposito? Do you think that he knows what she wants? I don't know if it's going to live up to the sexual attraction he feels for his mom's big butt.

I mean, there were a couple fleeting moments where I found myself attracted to Dana Carvey. What? Fleeting. I said fleeting. When? I said fleeting. The scene where Jennifer Esposito basically seduces him, I was like, oh, this must be tough. That's the moment where I said, give her every award you could possibly find. Give her an EGOT on the spot. Just deliver all four.

You done did it. You did it. I will say this. I think Jennifer Esposito is best off with data. What? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Guys, before we go to the audience, I know we're running a little long. I just want to say the cameos. Michael Johnson. They got Michael Johnson in this movie.

What were they going for with these weird cameos? Alright, so every major artifact was given to a really weird celebrity. It's like...

Jesse Ventura. Jesse Ventura, who clearly only agreed if they would advertise his action figure, which was real. They turn it out to the camera. Jessica Simpson is given the lunar module. You can keep it, Jessica. But they play her song, right? Yes. Oh, right. And then Michael Johnson was like, sure, I'll do it. Michael Johnson is here tonight. For real question, is Michael Johnson here tonight?

And then Jennifer Esposito finds all those pictures of comedians. Of other Robin Williams, Whoopi Goldberg, everybody from Comic Relief. Yeah. Those are all the pictures that I guess Data took of James Brolin disguised before he went out and did his missions. So those are the missions we didn't see. But why photograph him like that? Who knows? Who knows? Honest to God, who the fuck knows?

Who the fuck knows why this movie... This movie happened to us. This movie happened to us. Wow, those lights just came on real hot. All right, we're going to go out to the audience and see what they think. Sir, in your best Italian accent, please tell me your name and then use your last name disguisedly. Okay, here we go.

Peter Disguisey. Amazing. All right, now Peter is wearing a Gish and Gertz shirt, which I love. Ladies of the 80s. He made it on his own. Do we make that, or did you make it? No, he made it. It's amazing. Gish and Gertz. Can we use any one of those? Gish and Gertz? I love that. I would like that, too. All right, sir, your name. Oh, sorry, I got it. Sir, your question. Okay.

So I, doing research, typed in Master Disguise and then on Google it was like 7 deep. Turtle scene was shot on September 11th. Yes. I knew this and I literally said to Jason in June, I don't know if I want to bring this up at the live show, but it's worth mentioning. This is for you, New York. This is for you. Never forget.

that the turtle club scene was shot on september 11th yipes that's a straight up yipes that whole day can you imagine can you imagine shooting this while september 11th is happening um new york

Well, you know what? That will bring me to this clip and that's why I played the Captain America clip because at one point they go like, "Why are you Captain America but have an Italian accent?" And he's like, "Well, we all are different in America and that's good." But here is a clip of Dana Carvey talking about the importance of this movie post 9/11. By the way, the fact that that, what that man did not bring up that I read in my research was the cast and crew took a moment of silence. A moment. Just a brief moment.

- Guys, go-- - And we're filming one of the-- - Sorry, Jason. Was Dana Carvey in the turtle costume during that moment of silence? - He was in the turtle costume when Building 7 fell. - His head went down. All right, here, here-- - Too soon? - Yes. - New York? - Yes.

Alright, here we go. This is Dana Carvey kind of roughly talking around that. Now that you know it, it will have a greater meaning to you. I said, I just want to do a lot of different people. I don't care what they say. They say, you play yourself and you do a drama. Alright, this is Rob Green from Insomnia. One hour photo. Yes, I'm not a serial killer. I'm just a writer in a cabin. You're wrong.

It's cool that they got Paul McCartney to promote. Ooh, that's so weird.

To reference the movie as a post-9/11 movie also kind of creeps me out.

Okay, let's go back to the crowd after that moment here. Ma'am, I'm coming back to you. Your name in the best disguise-y voice and your question. A mayor disguise-y. Great. Okay, so to honor the horniness, I guess, of New York City, what should we be yelling out as we fuck and come from the movie? Did not expect this question from this woman. Wow.

This girl gets it. She understands what this is about. She understands what the late show is about. Because she knows she's fucking tonight. That's what New York's about. This city's getting laid. And you should just probably be like, turtle, turtle, turtle. You should probably, like, when you're coming, go like, turtle, turtle, turtle.

Or like stare deep into your lover's eyes and say, become another person. Become another person. Become another person. Become another person. Become another person. I would... Please, please tweet us if you do that to your lover tonight. Deep while you're like, don't do it initially. Like fuck for a while. Then right as you're in it, go just look and be like,

Become another person. Your name and the best disguise-y voice in your question. Brian Disguise-y. That was pretty good. I was wondering, in Kevin Nealon's scene at the end, he's asking if the Master of Disguise can turn into Barbra Streisand. Is he assuming that the genitalia is going to change? And also, he asks if the Olsen twins, and they're 15 at the time when they make this fucking scene.

Yes. Yes. So you're saying... You're saying... So, yes, when a... I'm assuming that when a disguisee changes gender, that the genitals change with them. Like, Bo Derek seems to be Bo Derek, right? I mean... Okay, first of all, if we're asking about genitals, let's just talk about the sex of the person and not their gender. But... So... Because...

They're putting on a costume. Let us not forget that. They are putting on a costume. There is no magic involved here. There is. In fact, the magical... There's no magic. There's no magic here. The magical art of disguise. There is no magic in this movie. Jason? Now, here's what I'll say, Paul. That costume might have a vagina. I'm listening.

But James Brolin doesn't have a vagina as far as I know. Prove it. I can't. You're absolutely right, I can't. Jason, June, I'm in the balcony. Be careful, Paul. But I want to respond to that because I was kind of against what June was saying early on. But then as I was running up these three flights of stairs, I had a vision.

They're always dressed in like a black turtleneck and black pants. So they're never in the body. Like the way that I would see it is they would rip off their face and they would still be like in the Bo Derek from the neck down. So are they creating full latex like clump-esque body suits? Are they Eddie Murphy-ing this thing? Let's do this. Just for audience vote.

Do you think that when a disguisee transforms into whoever they are disguising themselves as, there is magic that is involved that makes them actually become that person? Yes? Now, how many of you believe that is not the case and it is just dress-up? Interesting.

So you think when they say the magical, you don't think Energico is a real thing? No, if anything, here's what it feels like. The disguisees for many years have been dressing up in costume. For generations and generations. As a joke, someone said, yeah, it's the magical art of disguise.

So wait a second, when James Brolin looks like Bo Derek, how do you account for the difference in physical size? How do you account for the difference in physical weight? How do you account for he is Bo Derek? When the grandfather is the maid, when Dana Carvey comes in and the grandfather is the maid dusting up, how is that possible?

The problem I have with it is if they transformed, if when standing there as the maid, there were like twinkles and lights and sort of hazy transformation back into the grandfather, then I'd say, yeah, that looks like magic. What I see is him pulling off a latex costume.

And you know what? I'm on June's side because here's the thing that really now pulls it all together for me. I'm up in the balcony if you want to have eye contact, Jason. They have him try on the suit that blows up with air. So if he was transforming into the shape and size of somebody, they would never have a suit that has helium in it. Al is James Brolin, Bo Derrick.

I got it. I got it. I got it. It's crumbling around you, Jason. It's almost as if they did a bad job writing the movie. Jason, how dare you? It's almost as if the movie is structurally unsound. When you have an hour and eight minute movie written by the guy who wrote Deuce Bigelow, Gigolo, and Deuce Bigelow, European Gigolo,

You know that this plot should work like clockwork. I mean, it really should. Sir, your name, your question. Teddy Disguisey. My question is about the person in the fighting dummy in the post-credits. Was he an employee of the Disguiseys? Does he get dental? Just...

What's going on? The grandpa knows him. Has he been there this entire time? Is there a line of employees of people in the fighting dummy? Amazing question. Jason, June, tackle that. Was there a person in that thing? Yes, Jason. I missed that. There was a little person. Oh, I missed it. Wow. Oh, was it in the post-credit thing? Oh, was it? Oh, that's why. I stopped watching this movie as quickly as I could.

The minute there was a single credit, I was like, and off, and tried to forget what I just watched. There was a little person who ran out and then sort of became a part of the credit sequence and spoke to camera with Dana Carvey. And when the credit sequence was over, you heard that little person request credit.

to get a proper goodbye and send off? Is that what happened or have I lost my mind? It was insane. I didn't watch any of that and I'm glad. You didn't watch the 10 minute credit sequence? I did not. Shockingly, I did not. We've talked about a lot. We've talked about it being offensive. We've talked about the cameos. I mean, I also want to say that I didn't think that the movie was well-researched.

They kept on talking about going to Palermo Prison, and I was like, that can't be a place. And it's not. There's a real place. It's Pagalorelli Prison. That's where they would have gone. And I just want that for all the people out there who really like to know the nitty-gritty details. That's the prison where Data would have been incarcerated. And there it is. It's a small prison. Paul, are you okay? Yeah.

I thought there was a moment that I thought was very funny, which is Dana Carvey and his grandfather. I believe it's like the training montage type of set up.

and they think Dana Carvey's obsessed with women with big butts. Okay, that's part of it. This we know. And then they see a woman crossing the street with a big butt and they're like, ooh la la, right? It's amazing. Then it turns around and it's a man, right? And they are so shocked that they take the ice cream cones they have and jam them straight into their mouths. It is such a shocking juxtaposition of images. Yes.

To be like, sexy lady? Uh-oh, man! Shove that cone in like a dick. When Dana Carvey, before he starts learning the art of magical disguise, when he's a waiter and drops that spaghetti onto that table, the reactions of those people, they all have spaghetti over their heads in a lot of it.

They don't move as though they've been killed. They are literally lifeless, motionless. And they are what I would believe to be suffocating. There is so much pasta over their faces, they must be suffocating under it. Well, and then they say a very odd line. They go, I told you we should have gone to Burger King. Was that the option?

Burger King or this nice Italian restaurant? Or should we go to Disguisees tonight? Well, of course we had an opinion about this movie, but there are people out there with a different opinion. It is now time for Second Opinions. I'm gonna log right onto Amazon. I'm gonna write Second Opinions. I'm gonna log

onto Amazon I'm gonna write second opinions I got the master of disguise dressed like cherry pies Brolin's in the back cashing checks and slap and slap Pistachio's his name Big butts are his game Access kind of wacky No two scenes sound the same Giving it five stars

Giving it five stars I'm gonna run right on to Amazon I'm gonna write second opinions Give it up for Jerry! These are five star reviews called from Amazon.com There are 58% of these reviews are five stars

How? Yeah, and again, I say it to all of you listeners out there, stop tanking the system. People keep on writing reviews under the five-star logo for us. They're like, Paul, Jason, June, why did you make me watch this? I feel violated. That's why we did it. Don't mess up the ecosystem. This is something that is scientifically based here. All right, this one's from Kat. She writes...

Wow.

Wow. This one is from Sam. That's like their family. Yeah. The family movie is Master of Disguise. They can only hang out when this is on. And you're going to notice as these reviews go on, there is a theme of community, of love around this film. Sam Kandor writes, I grew up watching this movie and I cannot stress enough how good it is.

I mean, if you just looked up this movie title, we're gonna be friends. Five stars. Then this one from Loretta. My family does not like to watch very many movies, but this one rates the highest. We all laugh at the same part, and afterward, we sound like the movie for weeks. Our friends always know when we've watched it again. Thanks for sharing. We have watched this movie twice.

Several times. Five stars. And then we go to... Wait, our friends know when we've watched it. That's a scathing indictment. Turtle. Turtle. They're doing that. Or when they come over like, excuse me, I don't know if I have it. Is that just being like Italian weirdos? I bet you that's true. Cable writes this. The title of the review is Great in the Right Situation.

And I'm gonna jump in in the middle. I do admit the segment on the little rowboat named Orca was pretty funny. But maybe that's because I'd recently seen Jaws on cable so it was fresh in my mind. This is also a great getaway movie. Had a bad day, week, feeling run down, like just shutting off and shutting out the world. This is one of those movies to watch over and over.

It makes a great comfort. Forget it all. Getaway movie in every way, in my opinion. And that is when it can truly be appreciated for what it offers. Other reviews give more details about the movie, but I recommend one watch in those who need to escape a certain situation. Five stars.

I had to pull a couple of these because they're so great. That one is haunting. Yeah. Yeah, I feel someone has been murdered. Like that, I feel like, is that person talking about September 11th? It's a great getaway movie when you're... Like when you need to just shut out the world and indulge in just the magical art of disguise. Literally, that person is saying...

That the remedy that you need when you are feeling down is exactly the remedy that Dana Carvey gives to the kid who falls on the skateboard. Imagine if you will. All of us are here, right? We all must have those movies that when we're in a bad mood, cheer us up. Bowfinger. Munich. Really? Bowfinger? Munich? These are the two movies that...

Bowfinger is one of my favorite movies. Oh, that's fine. I was joking about Munich. But there are those movies, right, that give you something, that bolster your mood, that buoy your whatever it is. And for that person, it's this movie. That's... Wow. That's wild. Oof. That's a straight up oof-ma-goof.

When I first watched this movie a couple years ago, I thought I'd missed something. It was a relatively entertaining family movie, but I would have struggled to recount what it was about. Seeing it again recently totally cracked me up. It's up there with Drop Dead Fred.

I love the dichotomy of an utterly earnest character with such a ridiculous accent. The dichotomy of the extreme... They don't know how to use dichotomy. The dichotomy of the extreme earnestness and ridiculous behavior coming from Carver's character is similar to that of Tom Green's performance in Freddy Got Fingered.

The use of such a non-contemporary concept is another vital part of the film's appeal. The historical fantasy of the family history adds another enchanting backdrop to the ridiculous proceedings. He thinks, "Your name is Pistachios? That is my name."

It doesn't have a strong narrative, but I don't think that that's something that detracts from what this movie is. It seems like this movie probably disappointed the largest number of viewers of any movie in the 2000s, and I don't know what to make of that. But if you go into this movie expecting something typical or realistic, you'll be disappointed. But if you're open-minded to take it on its own terms, it will grow on you. I even liked it more watching it the third time. Five stars.

Remember when he's disguised as a cherry pie? And violently shoots cherries out of his mouth like a machine gun. So many cherries, it's impossible. It's... Like we said, the film came out in 2002. The budget of this movie, $16 million. Where is that money? Those costumes. It's in the turtle costume. Jeez. Jeez.

But guess how much money it made worldwide? 43 million. It made 40 million in the United States. The opening weekend was 12 million. The top three movies of 2002, Spider-Man, Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers, Star Wars Episode II. This movie came in 63rd out of all the movies made in 2002. It was beaten by Triple X. And this movie beat Crossroads, The Country Bears, and Jason X.

That's like, that's not nothing. You know what I mean? This movie was successful. Yes. Had you heard of this movie before? Yes. Oh, wow. I had too. Yeah. I had never seen it, but I'd heard of, I remember when this came, I remember this being a, I thought, I genuinely am only now hearing that. I thought of this as some sort of spectacular flop. Right.

My understanding was it was like a real misstep, and it was perhaps creatively, but now I'm hearing successful. I remember watching it in 9-11 support groups. The tagline is... A lot of 9-11 tonight, New York. A lot of 9-11 tonight. I love this tagline. Disguise the limit. By the way, I'm not into it.

Like, there's a bunch of funny wordplay in here. There's a bunch of dumb jokes, silliness. Like, the movie is overtly silly. And that plays into it. I do. Would you recommend this film? I mean, I think we've danced around it a lot. Would you recommend it, Jason June? You know, here's what I'll say. I wish I had been stoned watching it.

Because I actually think it would have been a great movie to watch a little bit stoned. Here's what I'll say, June, about watching this movie stoned. Allegedly. It is terrifying. Really? Yeah, I watched this movie today and I was like, what is this? What's going on?

No, no, I think it is pretty fun. It is actually a little bit fun, so... But it is... There was stuff that happened in this movie. Like, there's the jokes where he looks straight down the lens and is like, it...

It's such a bad idea. It just might work. And I just giggled like this is funny. I giggled a lot. I can't even remember what the scene was but there was one scene where he walked into his house this is so dumb but he walked into his house after it had been ransacked and his parents were gone and just listening to him process it and he says everything is different.

I laughed so hard at that dumb line. So for just those small moments, there's another moment where he says something like, what word did you think we were talking about? And she says...

and his grandfather says disguise and he says of or whatever that moment was. I'm butchering it, but it made me laugh so hard. I had some laughs and for that I would recommend this movie. Look.

June, I'm on the same page. I normally regret that I have an iTunes movie collection full of garbage. By the way, I bought this movie too. So we both separately on our own accounts. In our household, we own two copies of this movie. We are on a list. In our home.

And there was a moment today where I was like, maybe I should show this to our oldest. What? I think he might like it. Paul. What? No. You don't think this would appeal to him? I don't think he's old enough for this movie. For Pistachio Disguisey? I've seen Paw Patrol episodes that have had more of a... Let me ask you this. How often are you willing to have him watch this?

He's gonna watch it more than once. Then it's one of his favorite movies. Then you are living with someone who's doing an Italian accent all the time. He's putting shaving cream beards on, wearing underwear on his head. I sent one of my kids to school with underwear on his head. I mean, it was crazy hat day. Underwear is not a hat. That was the joke. And it was a huge hit.

Is that why you asked for a pair of my underwear? Yes. But to this point, I regret it all. I actually like this movie. I'd like to revisit this film. And to Jason's point in the beginning about this movie making the exact wrong choice, I think it could be really summed up very early on that when they are...

doing something they reference Ask Jeeves, which I think even in 2002 was not a thing anymore. - There's a lot of very current references. The movie is full of references, both classic movies,

Dana Carvey's work, like George Bush, all this stuff. But then there's also like Ask Jeeves or The Dummy's book or all this kind of just like throwaway reference stuff that is just like messing up the movie in a weird way. And oddly, Kenan Thompson is like fourth build and he has a line in a montage bidding on priceless artifacts and revealed at the end, he's playing himself.

Really? Yeah. Amazing. Do you think when Scarlett Johansson just recently said that she should be able to play any character regardless of race and gender, et cetera, that she was referencing Master of Disguise? Well, with that...

I will say there is a prominent rumor in Hollywood that the Black Widow movie is a backdoor Master of Disguise sequel. The MCU is bringing in the disguises. You heard it here first. Ladies and gentlemen, that's our show. Thank you. New York City! Thank you. New York City!

City, you are amazing. Live from the Beacon Theater. Holy shit, the Beacon Theater. That was a fun, fun show. If you know anything about the show, you know that we are making T-shirts. As we went on the road every night, we made a special T-shirt. You can go to tpublic.com slash stores slash HDTGM to check out our T-shirts.

Sure, you are gonna love it. A big thank you to Avril Haley, our producer who picks all of our films. I mean, she does an amazing job. Also, a big shout out to Devin who traveled on the road with us. He's our engineer.

killing it on the road. Cody, our producer, holding it down in Los Angeles. And Nate Kiley, doing all that research. A big shout out to the ghost of Craig T. Nelson for these amazing designs that have been popping up on our Instagram. That's right, you can follow us on Instagram at HDTGM, not the one with all the underscores. That's not us. Follow the one that actually updates all the time. That is us. Or you can follow me on Instagram or on Twitter or whatever you want to do. June is on, Grace and Frankie still.

She's killing it on there all the time. And Longshot is on VOD right now, which June and I are both in. Check it out. And we will see you next week for a mini episode where you can bring up any issue that you would like to bring up. And you can give me a call at 619-P-A-U-L-A-S-K. That's 619-Paul-Ask. You can ask me about your life. You can ask me about your love. You can ask me about your job. I will answer all those questions on the mini episode. And we will see you next week for a How Did This Get Made mini episode where you are the star.

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