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Hi, listeners. It's your friend Tig Notaro. I wanted to let you know that today my new stand-up special, Hello Again, premieres on Prime Video. So check that out, tell your friends, and share the good news on social media. Thanks. ♪ Handsome Pot ♪ ♪ Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pot ♪ ♪ Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pot ♪
Cheers! Hello, it is your friend Tig Notaro sitting here with my co-hosts. Fortune Feimster. And your pal. Oh, sorry. Oh, no. I'm so sorry. Oh, Mae. It's my most stressful part of this podcast. Is saying your name. Is saying hello. Yes, yeah. I'm Mae Martin. And welcome to the Handsome Pod!
Oh, welcome. Well, before we move on, Mae, how are you doing? I'm absolutely fine. I don't know why I couldn't breathe and speak. Well, I mean, you're only what, 38? 36. 36. Oh my God, a baby. I haven't had time to learn how to speak and breathe at the same time. I'm 25. This is crazy. This is crazy. I can rent a car. You only look 42. I can't.
I can rent a car for the first time. It's pretty exciting. Can you not rent a car before 25? No. You're kidding. 25 is the age that her parents gave. No, it really is. That's the rule. 25. The only reason I want to get my driver's license is to rent a car and go on road trips and drive my friends. So now I'm like, maybe I wait. But you're old enough. You're old enough. You are old enough.
Wait. I was more concerned that you need to learn how to drive. Wait. Walk us through how that happened. My thought process is there.
Okay, I was thinking, I truly thought. You're well past. Yeah, I could. Okay, so I could. Yeah, you can rent a car. No, Canadians are only, they have to be 36 or above. I think I thought maybe the gap was like you have to be driving a certain number of years. Oh, interesting. But I also must think of myself as 21. Maybe. That was crazy. That was a really genuine. That was a reveal. Is that the age you feel like you are?
I've had two, like I feel, like we've talked about, I feel perpetually like 13, braces, long hair, monstrous. That person can't drive a car. That person cannot. But they would be blasting Third Eye Blind, let me tell you. Third Eye Blind? Yeah, big time. Okay. Wow. Yeah, and imagining I was like the male singer. Yeah.
I used to, I had long hair, braces, acne, and I was like, I am... By choice? Yeah, I was like, gotta get the whole picture. And I was so obsessed with all these men and I would have these fantasies where I would be singing like...
- I don't wanna miss a thing, like a male thing, but I would imagine grown men in the audience watching me with boners. - Oh, interesting. - Have I said this before? - You've said something about Third Eye Blind before. - I feel like you give off the vibe of that. - The boner part is new. - Fortune. - Dig. - What? - I'm just repeating men. - Well, don't repeat that word.
Do you think if we went on a cross-country driving road trip, like... Oh, fun. Put it on the list. Put it on the list, actually. Thomas. Put it on the list. Who would be in charge of, like, the playlist, and would we all agree on... We would have to rotate the playlist. Okay. I'd be in charge. I think that's true. Yeah, I'd be in charge. But you'd be holding the map. Okay. Because we can't use GPS. You'd have to... We can't? No. Not even Waze? No. We'd have to bring a paper.
- Wow. - And you can't drive. - Not every person in the car, I can't drive 'cause I'm- - What are you doing? - I'm winking at people, high-fiving. I'm doing it all. - Yeah. What's May doing? - I really wanna drive. - I'm doing this. - You're singing some tunes. - You're singing for sure. - We're both singing. - I know, you're putting our suitcases in the car. - Oh, I can lift the suitcases. - So strong. - Yeah. - During the drive, I'm kind of- - Giving everybody boners over there. - Fortune!
You have given everyone a boner.
what has this show turned into i'm in the car giving everyone boners no i'm driving so does that mean if you're the playlist are you in the front nobody's driving well maybe we should bring thomas thomas thomas is driving thomas is driving because you're i don't know i can be in the back seat i don't mind bossing us around isn't the passenger person about the boss yeah backseat drivers okay but will you be navigating from the back
I'm worried that I... Well, no, actually, I'm pretty good with directions. Yeah, I would do that. Yeah, sure. I'll navigate from the back. With a compass, like a physical compass. A compass and a map from a gas station. Yes. I don't even know how to use a compass. Whenever we get lost, then we have to pull over to a gas station and ask. Ooh, and get snacks. No, ask directions. And get snacks. Yeah.
But in the car, I'm just like on my phone texting or something. We need you to be of use to us. I could compliment Tig's music choices in a very up-sequence way. Just like, I love this one. And where did you first hear this? Now, are we live streaming any of this? Or is this for us? May could be in charge of that. We'll probably need to turn it into a documentary. That's true. Also, you could be flexing your muscles. I have been. I have been.
You've been lifting weights? I just ruined any like coolness I would have had by the level of excitement in my voice. It happens every time. I've been working out. I have actually been lifting heavy things. You're lifting weights? Yeah. Nice. And it's like, you know the way with your treading water? Yeah. It's my treading water. Yeah, sorry. Tig's treading water. No, it's mine.
What if I was like commandeering treading water? No, Tig, this is my thing. I started it.
And by the way, I started it. Why does that tickle me so much? Fortune, you're treading water. That's mine! No, actually, it's mine. Okay. So it's like Fortune's treading water thing. Fortune's thing that she borrowed from Tig. I've been on a break. It's been raining a lot. But you know how you go up in increment and you're happy? I do know how I do this. Yeah, yeah. Tig has no idea about this. Well, I don't go up in increments. I just do it for an hour straight. Oh, really? I had to work my way up.
But it is TIG things. And now you've worked your way out due to the weather. I was just going to say I've gone up to a heavier weight, I guess. It's not a great story. Oh, that's what we're getting to? That's what we're getting to. I've gone up. That's good, Meg. I've gone up. Thanks. It feels good. You'll lift the luggage. I'll lift the luggage. And flex. Since we are sharing good news, I did find out that my heating bill wasn't as crazy as I thought it would be. Duh.
doing my thing of treading water. Oh, okay. Because I have solar panels. You know, getting to know you better, it's so funny how you are on to... You like...
you, you know, dates and amounts of money. And, uh, you know, you're like, you're very business minded. You are business. You're organized. You're the, of the three of us. Stephanie really pointed that out to me after our live show. Yeah. She was like, you know, fortune just like gets up and confidently shakes hands. And like, you know, and I was like, well, that's Jack's boss. This is positive, right? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But wait, did I not get up and did we,
Were we just sitting there? I don't know what we were doing. Wait, who was I shaking hands with? Oh, like all the people that came in. Like businessmen. Yeah, the people that were like, hello, handsome pod. We might want to... Right, right. Because we were all kind of sitting there like... And I was like... It occurred to me. I was like, oh, I should like give a proper...
- Hello. - Well, we had Biggie backstage. That was really exciting. - That was an honor. - He's my baby. - I have this nice camera and you remember I was taking all these pictures of Biggie and in my mind they were gonna turn out like these beautiful like National Geographic portraits and they came out and they're just like so much flash and he's just like, "What?" It's like his eyeballs are just-- - I think he's cuter in person. Like you don't get his magic unless you see him right there up close. - It's also like,
I don't like little dogs that feel fragile and he's like proper, like you could hug him. - Yeah. - Or he's just like-- - He's a little bit hearty. - Little legs. - Yeah. - Yeah, he's good. - Oh, see, I like you guys even more now 'cause you appreciate my son. - Who wants to talk about my cats?
Well, I'm a little scared of fluff. Are the cats on our road trip? It's not fluff. It was Linus. Linus. Oh, yeah. Are the cats on our road trip? Yeah, of course. Okay. Oh, God. Are they in a carrier? No. Just roaming free. In a small sedan. Oh, my God. We're not even in a van? No, we are in a small sedan. Oh, no. Okay. We don't have that kind of cash. Trying to think about what size book bag do I bring. Book bag? You guys don't carry book bags?
- I travel with books? - No, like a, what do you call it? - Like naps at backpack? - A backpack. What did I call it, a book bag? - Yeah, a book bag. - Whatever, backpack, book bag. - A book bag's like a side meal, I imagine. - Oh, is it? - I've never heard the-- - I thought a book bag was also the same thing as a backpack. - When we're on this road trip, like when I would go with my parents, like we'd have big arguments about navigation and stuff. Like, do you think that's gonna happen? - I hope we don't fight.
I don't feel upset with either of you. Me neither. But I guess anything could happen. Remember when Mae that one time said, I hope that we go past April. You remember her saying that? When was that? The podcast at one point? You said that like two weeks ago. Didn't Mae say that? Yeah. Like, well, hopefully we go past April. Are you serious? It was something random like that.
And Mae's like, I hope we're doing this at Easter time. Like eating cheesecake together. That's really funny. But then I also said confidently that if I could pause time, I'd like to spend a week just with you guys. That's true. You made up for it. And you guys were like, we're busy. Right.
Yeah, I don't remember us feeling similarly, but I would want to spend some of that time with you for sure. Yeah, like a long weekend. Then I'd want to also sleep. A long weekend. I'd also want to sleep. You're going to want to sleep over the week. Catch up on some rest. I can't. How can I sleep when I could be bonding with my friends? Okay, be honest. I love to sleep. To go on a road trip. Yeah. With the four of us. With your best friends. With the four of us. Yeah.
Not your best friends, but the four of us. Finn and Max think so. We're your best friends. Well, they ask. Are Fortuna and Maggie your best friends? No. They are my co-workers. They're the friends I chat with. But
And we're your friends though. Not best friends, but we're friends. I had to explain to him, well, no, I don't care about them that deeply. I like them a lot. But yeah, if we went on a road trip
with Mr. Thomas in a small sedan with heavy luggage in the trunk that May's carrying. It's visceral. I can almost smell the sedan. Yeah. How long does this last? Yeah. How long is the trip? A week? A week.
I could do a, what if we do a lot? We did a long weekend. Oh, you want to do a long weekend? I thought you were going to say longer than a week. Oh, I don't know. Oh, see, you wanted to stop time to be with us. I think it's the driving part that's freaking me out, though. You don't have to drive. I know, but still, it's a very... You just have to be in the car flexing. Does anyone get car sick? No, I don't. Okay, good.
No, I don't think I do. Jack's got his car sick, but there's no room in the sedan. No, we got to. Our ladies will be home, you know. Yeah, we got to bring two cats, a dog. Three cats. Your book bag is huge. I have three cats. Your book bag is going to be a problem. That's taking up a whole. Your book bag is like in the books. Not a single book in there. Yeah.
We'll probably have to get one of those racks on the top for your book bag. And one of the cats. How about this? A holiday weekend. So it's an extra day. Which holiday? Christmas? Memorial Day. Let's go for Christmas. Let's spend Christmas together. Let's spend Christmas. Memorial Day or the 4th of July weekend because my birthday is July 1st. We could celebrate all
all of these things. So do we ever arrive at a destination or we're just driving? Sounds like we're just going to like Big Barren back or something. Never getting out. I feel like we're aimlessly driving. Are we going to the Phoenix? Somewhere tropical. Phoenix or somewhere tropical like that. Palm Springs. Palm Springs would be good. I would do it. It's two hours. Yeah, we want three solid days of driving. Oh, we have to drive the whole time? We can't at some point end up
Yeah, I guess we could stay at like a motel, roadside motel. Why does it have to be a motel? Well, we are on a budget. Also, I feel like I would eventually get tired of you flexing. Yeah, me too. So you can flex at the cars going by.
Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. And I'll just turn my back to you. Or you can put me on the rack on top and I can just pose. And we could do a sign of like, if you want to see more of this, follow us. Oh, yeah. We should be promoting the podcast during this road trip. Well, Thomas will have a megaphone out the window. We have a great plan, guys. It's pretty good. And we know if Fortune gets annoyed at us, we just compliment Biggie and then it warms. Why would you be annoyed with us? Yeah.
What's your problem? Sounds like you guys are pretty entertaining. That's enough flexing over there, Mae. Is that your... Who was that? Was that you or Tig? Yeah, it was me, Angry. Is that you, Angry? I guess in this scenario. Listen here, Jax. Listen here.
- I'm pretty chill on a road trip. - You suddenly became like a bad guy from Scooby Doo. - Yeah, I would only be ornery if I couldn't start the morning with some sort of espresso situation. Once I wake up and I do like to shower in the morning, I'm a morning shower person.
Like right when you wake up? Yeah. Before coffee? Yeah, before coffee. Whoa. I go straight to the shower. I get off all the night sweats.
I don't know if I have any. Oh, my God. And then I go straight for my espresso machine. Uh-huh. So as long as I have those two things, I'm in a good mood. And have you looked at your phone before all this? I, like, glance at it a little bit, but I'm not, like, knee-deep in it yet. And while you're in the shower, you're listening to our podcast. Yeah, probably. Do you ever take a bath, or is it always a shower? Oh, I love a bath. Okay. Not in the mornings, though. That's more of a, like, if I'm on the road. Yeah.
And I'm by myself and the room has a bathtub. I'm like, all right. Yeah. Get out those bath salts, baby. We're going to have some me time. What about bubbles? I love a bubble. I love a bubble. One big bubble. In a tub. Right here. On my nip. Fortune. Oh my God. The other one's just fully exposed. The other what? Nip. Fortune. That was a setup.
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This whole thing has been a setup. I love a bath. They're great. Oh, I love. Some people hate think they're just like sitting in their own dirty water, which is also true. But that's a little. Yeah. What's wrong with that? Yeah. What's wrong with that? It's my dirty water. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Stephanie and I take baths together.
Oh, tell us more. Really? Yeah. That's so nice. You and Parvati don't? We tried the other night and we're like instantly too hot and just like not enough room. And it was like kind of sexy for a minute. And then I was like, all right, I'm going to go. Oh, my gosh. We get in the tub together all the time. This is the content everybody's been waiting for. This is great. Come in a little closer. Yeah.
Bubbles? Oh, bubbles, bath salts. Candles? Maybe some candles. One time, I think I told you about when we tried to have... TMI. No, continue. We're good. Have I told you my feeling about TMI? Oh, no. Well, TMI stands for too much information. Yeah. And yet, TMI gives barely any information.
Interesting. Yeah. Something to think about. There's a lot of people on the edge of their seats right now. Yeah. So that's all we just, we sit in our filthy water and then what? And we towel off.
And then we're still in the bath right now. Yeah, wait. Are you guys making out in the bath? We sit. We chat with friends on the handsome part. Are you reading books? No, we chat. We sit and chat. Do you bring your book bag into the bathroom before you? Yeah. I don't have a book bag. I'll be honest with you. I just have a clutch. Yeah.
a little clay Scott get it cut but see y'all are small you two can fit in a tub easily well but we still are grown people and our legs are all right where there's moments in the bath where we're like oh can you move your leg well sorry I you know there's those little moments but we like to do that before bed and then
I don't know if I mentioned this on this show or not, but my brother collects whiskey and he sent fancy whiskey. So we were like, okay, maybe when we take one of our baths, we could have a little whiskey when we are in the tub. And so we did that and I took a sip of whiskey. And...
That good stuff is so strong. Really? It's so strong. Because it's a high alcohol. And from the heat. I heated up and I had to get out of the tub. I jumped out of the tub full of bubbles. That stuff's hardcore. It's like 110% proof or something. I ran to our bed and I was like, oh, God. Stephanie's still in the tub like, I'm finished.
It's always like, it's so sexy at first, but then when one person has to clamber out of the bath, you can't be sexy doing it. You become this spider monkey. It's true. When one person gets out first, b-hole. Is that better? Right in front of your face. Do you not know how to not do that? No. You can't sidestep out? I'm lucky to get out of there alive. No.
Sometimes your b-hole is in full view. Well, who cares? You're married to this person. I know, but do they want to see it?
Yeah, that's what she married you for. I don't know if that was. Solely for that. Are you? But I would have assumed that you guys were big into baths together. That's surprising that you were like, I'm going to get out of here. No, I just hop in the cold shower and towel off and start lifting weights. We did. I wish I was that guy. We did. We have had a couple, but no, I think in previous relationships, I've been more into baths.
baths. I had a romantic like Valentine's Day bath with someone who then farted in the bath so loud and then laughed so hard and we like I was so thrilled like I was crying laughing and she was so it was like she turned it into like a jacuzzi like yeah it was a really significant. Do you want to name names? Yeah.
She might appreciate the shout out. May loves name and names. I feel like I'm scared. I think she would stand by this. This was like a recurring problem. For me, it was a delight. It's a recurring problem for you because I feel like you've had a lot of... Of tutors. Of tutors. Yeah, I have actually. Somebody who has tutors may have tutors.
Wait, what? What was that? I was trying to make a joke that May has... Some people have suitors, you know? I got tutors. But May has tutors. I liked it. Thank you for allowing me to do it again. Do you want to say it again? Say it one more time. Say it one more time, yeah, but really sell it. Some people have suitors...
may has tutors you should really that was better you should close your next special with that i'm writing it down okay you don't need to you'll never forget that it's good go ahead oh i don't know i dated someone who i won't name who would pour gallons of apple cider vinegar into the bath and it's whoa it was it smelled like vinegar so strongly and uh
And she was like, it's good for like your pH or something. I was like, who told you this? Drink it. Yeah. Well, then she'd be in the bath and she'd gargle. No.
The apple cider vinegar. The one that's in the bathtub with her? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Drink it. Oh no. You broke up like the next day, right? I would have ended it there. It was not. That is. Get out, you weirdo. That's wild, you filthy weirdo. That is wild. She flew in to visit me one time and I was like. And she brought her apple cider vinegar with her. I was like, I got to order some to be ready for her. Like I, you know,
of the things you normalize when you're dating someone you're like oh my god and then she has the apple cider the vinegar bath so you were just like were y'all both in the tub and she
I never got in the... Okay. What she would try to encourage... I got sick once. I got a cold. She was like, you got to do the vinegar thing. Did her pH... She smelled fine? There was this... Yeah, she smelled great, but... She smelled fine? There was a slight vinegar... She smelled like vinegar? Essence in the apartment after the bath, but... This is... She smelled great, yeah. I've never heard of someone being in a bath with apple cider vinegar... And drinking. And they just get a cup and just...
I don't think there was a cup involved. I think it was like hands. Hands? This was like when I, when I caught her. I love that Fortune pictured her with a little ladle. With a little ladle, yeah. With a little spoon. Yeah. Hands. This is like primitive. I don't know.
I've never seen fortune this much. I can't get over this. Yeah. And I love that you were like, I got your apple cider vinegar for this. Wait, primitive how? I was really, I don't know. I don't even think it's primitive. Like, I just think it's like beastly. Weird. You think it's beastly? Yeah. Beastly. Let's see a picture of this one. I was really infatuated and just kind of was like, yeah, okay. All right. That's pretty weird, but cool. And then, yeah.
I'll show you after. See, this is the problem. We let hot people get away with weird stuff. I think...
Someone needs to start telling hot people that not everything's okay. I remember one time, though, I had to go to work and I left her like in the vinegar bath. And then so I came back. She left in the evening and she'd written she'd done like in a romcom written on my mirror with lipstick, a message to me, which a so hard to get off your mirror after like, and also she had spelt my name wrong.
and we had been dating for months. - How did she spell your name? - M-A-Y. - I know. - I'm speechless. - I know, I know. - Well, I hate to ruin this conversation about apple vinegar, but we have a very special guest today that I feel like we should.
We do. We cannot wait any longer because I'm on the edge of my seat. We have been behind the scenes talking about this and the potential of this happening since the beginning, putting pressure on Tig to make this a reality. There has been a lot of pressure on me. Yes. And I was willing to step in and ask if it didn't work out for you to ask. I was not.
Yeah, because I don't know this person. I do know this person. But you've seen her in things. Oh, I've seen her work. I've seen her work. And I'm a deep fan. So this is huge. OK, well, and here's what's fun. You put pressure on me. But guess what? Guess who else was putting pressure on her? Who? Who?
private chef no way huge fan of handsome no way huge fan can we okay this might be a little forward I know we haven't gotten to our guests yet we know who it is
Should we ask her if you want to follow up to see if we should come over for dinner at some point? I should probably see if her chef wants to make handsome dinner. But at Jen's house. Well, you just revealed who it is. Well, it isn't in the description. Well, nobody will know who Jen is until I explain that it's Jennifer Aniston. What? Oh, my God. What an exciting day on the handsome pod.
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Listen, I'll dig into a shell for pistachio, but this is just so easy. You pop them in your mouth. I take them on trips. They are so good. So visit wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more. That's wonderfulpistachios.com. You've filmed with her. I have. You were in a very funny scene that I remember thinking, that was a great scene. Office Christmas party. We had a, I like to call it iconic. Hi.
Scene where I drove her in an Uber in an office Christmas party. It won the People's Choice Award for best scene with electric chemistry. But I had met Jen a couple times. I also call her Jen. Where are people just meeting Jen? Well, she did a couple things. I sat beside her at Thanksgiving at Chelsea Handler's house. Okay, nice. A long time ago. And she was like, I was so starstruck.
um she's so pretty and so like the nicest freaking person chelsea yes tall um and it was the only seat left and i just started at chelsea like no one really knew who i was oh my god she was like
I made the Greek salad. I'm like, I love salad. Oh my God. You're like, that was my favorite thing on the table. Crazy. I love Greek people. I know. Yeah. But, uh, and then she filmed a thing for, uh, this little after show thing we did. Um, and then yeah, did that movie with her and then I would see her, you know, press stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then you guys are proper pals. You're, you're in morning show. We are like buds. We are proper pals. Um, yeah.
I'm happy to tell you my origin story with Jen. We were both at a wedding in New Orleans. And this is what I was just saying to Jen the other night that it's so crazy that
That we met in New Orleans. So we're at the wedding. Her spouse partner was in the wedding. Okay. And so she was just like, hey, come sit by me. Because we had been talking briefly. And I was like, okay, yeah, sure. And then we had such a nice time. And then at dinner, she was like, come sit by me at dinner. And I was like, yeah, sure.
Yeah, because when you're, I mean, I guess I'd say Jennifer Aniston, there's the big reveal. I already said it. Oh, yeah, you missed the big reveal. Yeah, I looked right at the camera.
I don't know which camera. Did you? How did I miss that? I think I was still thinking about that apple cider vinegar bath. When you're dinner-ranicing, you can just move a place card and put someone else. And the seating arrangement. Yeah. Because you sat by her. I did. And we had such a fun time that weekend. And I left thinking, well, that was so fun. And she's so nice. But I wasn't thinking...
I'm sure we're probably going to be pals. And then I went out to lunch with my agent and he was like, what went on with you and Jennifer Aniston last weekend? And I was like, I said, we were at a wedding. What are you talking about? And he said, her agent called me and said, Jen wanted to work with you. Oh, that's so cool. And I was like, really? I was so thrown off because I was just like, oh, that was just a fun moment in time. And then...
You know, I think sometimes when people are as well known as Jen, there can be those that, you know, just...
Maybe you find out they're not as friendly or whatever. And then with her, I was like, Stephanie and I always marvel over just the kindness that she exudes with strangers, with fans, with friends, anyone that comes in her door. She's just so...
Anyway, and then yeah, working with her has been a real treat. - Yeah, I love that. - I don't know why I didn't get her phone number. This is weird. - Well, I have never met her but when Lisa Kudrow, who's my friend and the best, was promoting my show Feel Good, she did like an actors on actors interview with Jennifer Aniston and
Jennifer Aniston said that I was beautiful in the clip. We've never met. She was like, oh yeah, and that person is like so beautiful. I isolated the clip. I went into iMovie. I isolated the clip. I thought I sent the clip to everyone I knew. Yeah, it really, I wrote, I was high off that for a couple of weeks.
She did do an impression of me once. I think I isolated that video. That's really good. Did she nail it? She did a very good job. Yeah. You know her from Friends. You know her from The Morning Show. You know her. You love her. It is our dear friend, Jennifer Aniston. It's Jen Aniston here. I love each and every one of you, by the way. I have to say that. And pardon the stain on my shirt. Okay, here's my question.
Have you ever been to a psychic or a medium, mediums talk to dead people, that said something that absolutely blew your mind, that you couldn't believe they got? Ungoogleable information.
That is my question. She's the best. Name a more likable person. I mean, she is very likable. Yeah. She just, she gets more beautiful with age. I mean, I know we're gushing at this point. Yeah. I'm actually gushing from menopause. Oh, my God.
Do you want to take the blazer? Yeah, I'm getting that blazer off. Get it off. Come on now. I like a psychic situation. I have not talked to one in a while, but there was a time in my life where...
Like once every like four months I called a psychic. Once every four months? Was it because you're waiting on love kind of thing? I think so. Are you serious? Yeah, I was really into it. You're just like, where's Jax? I was like, give me all the information you can. And what were you saying to her? Like, who is my partner going to be or what can I do? Yeah, just like career stuff was not happening and love stuff was not happening and it just kind of...
You know, I need answers. Was your psychic like, hey, fortune? Yeah, like, oh my God. I got Christmas cards from the psychic. No way. For like three years. I haven't done it to lonesome fortune. Honestly, since I met Jax, I have not talked to a psychic. Hmm.
It's really weird that this question is coming now. It's a little spooky because I've just been DMing with a psychic medium who's a fan of Handsome Pod. Whoa. And it popped up and I followed her and then I DMed. I was like, hey, do you have any sessions available? And she's super booked up, but I just liked her vibe. So my grandma went to see a psychic after her boyfriend died and she was really excited
like I just want to talk to this love of my life and it was in England and it was this psychic medium who didn't charge he was just like burdened by the gift and so I kind of trust that it was yeah was it a man it was a man because I was just about to ask are psychics ever men definitely they are okay yeah yeah and she goes in and she sits down and he's like okay your father's here and she was like I don't want to talk to my father I'm looking for my boyfriend and her father died when she was like four or something
And he's like, yeah, your boyfriend's like busy, I guess. Hooking up with someone else. Or he's like, your boyfriend's not here. Or he's, you know, down there. Oh, God. Fortune. He didn't make it up there. Don't even talk like that. Don't even suggest such a thing. Don't talk about my grandma's boyfriend like that. Yeah. I can't with you. Then he could be down there. So then he goes, you're...
Stop looking at me, Tig. Go on, man. I apologize. I apologize for Tig. Tig's still keeping an eye on you. He's in heaven. We know this. Okay. And then the father's there and then she's like, okay, well, I got nothing to say to my father. I barely knew him and
And the psychic says he wants me to tell you that he's sorry he yelled at you for when you brushed his top hat fabric the wrong way. And that's the only memory of her father that she had. How specific is that? He probably knew that. And he didn't want that to be her only memory and it'd be bad. Isn't that crazy? That is wild. That is wild. He should be charging. He should be charging. That was a long time ago, right?
Yeah. Yeah. And I'm sorry, this was your grandmother's experience with a psychic? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, because Jen's question was our...
experience with this. Oh my god. Yeah, I've watched your rare. This one over here is in rare form. Oh my god. Yeah, you're right. But it's always someone else with ghosts and stuff. It's always a friend. Someone else always has a cool story. I'm trying to remember if there was a specific thing that like came true. I think I went so much that all that all the information just rolled together. Yeah. So when you would pop up or you
When you're like, hey, it's me again. She's like, what is... Anything on the horizon. Sometimes it was on the phone. Okay. It wasn't on Zoom or... No, but this was pre-Zoom. This was a while ago. This would have been like 10 or 11 years ago. Yeah, Skype, FaceTime. How insane is it that Skype missed the boat? I don't know.
No, because they were all teed up. They were on the cutting edge. And then a pandemic hits and Zoom's like, we got it. Yeah, it's weird. That's a good point. I miss it. I miss the sound. The beep, beep, beep. Beep, beep, beep. Right? I don't remember the sound, but it bothers me. You know Skype is like, we had it in the bag. I know. What happened?
happened. I know. Well, since we're telling other people's psychic stories. I should know. I had an interview with Ellen. Why are you pointing at me? You're gay too. You're gay too. She did finger guns at you too. Ellen did an interview where she was told by a psychic that she would get Finding Nemo. No. And that that would be the thing that turned everything around. Is this a story Ellen told?
Or you read it in People magazine? Ellen has told me no stories. Because I have follow-up questions, but I feel like you don't have the answers. I don't have the answers, so don't ask. It was an interview. I'm sure that I'm not making this up. That Ellen did... I can't remember on what. Who cares if you're making it up? Like, why are you telling... This is like when you tried to tell us the whole plot of that Western TV show, but you were like... And then he's in his family, and...
because i honestly can't think of a specific thing a psychic told me so i was like well i know someone i don't like know or know her i just read it who had that experience in the early 2000s i think ellen went to it what if i show ellen this episode and you're on here talking about no i it resonated with me because i remember thinking
God, I wish I knew who that psychic was. So you could get a call and get a reading. Get an animation gig. Yeah. Hopefully mine's on the horizon. Now I don't have the need as much. I think I was looking for answers. You get it.
I want to talk to dead relatives and friends. I would like to talk to my grandmother. Yeah, I would really like to do that. The Long Island medium. Yeah, the Long Island medium and then also... And she does it with an accent. Let me tell you something. I have your grandmother here. Here's what she wanted you to know. Okay? More, more, please. Yeah, more. Your grandmother says that, you know, that...
That bottle on the counter. Don't even worry about it. That happened. It wasn't your fault. You're good. She's great. And I want you to have peace. Okay. You know what I mean? I like when they go and they go to like a stadium of people. I'm getting the letter R. Is there someone needs a letter R? And then like,
What do you mean a stadium of people? This is, they get huge. They're like those mega churches. Yeah. And people go and they do like crossing over with John Edwards. Remember him? That was like, people want to talk to the loved one. Well, have I told you?
lately that I love you? Oh, you have a story? This is good. Well, I have a story. I was booked on the Long Island Medium. What? Oh, wait, you did tell us that. We did know this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they didn't use the episode because everything she said, I was like, no.
I showed up. I was so newly in my relationship with Stephanie. Yeah. And Stephanie is so into psychics. Yeah. And mediums, all that kind of stuff. And I was like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, this isn't totally my thing. But I love Stephanie and I want to go and do this. And I'm telling you, I went crazy.
So open. Okay. I really did. Damn. But there's got to be. I still want a reading with the Long Island medium. Should we all do one? Is she still on TV? She's doing tours and stuff. I see her name on Marquise. Thomas?
Can you put that on the list? We gotta go. You would like the long-awaited medium to get in contact with us so that we could talk to one of our loved ones. I won't repeat that story, but yeah, go into much detail about that. But it was... It was disappointing. But ooh, this you might enjoy. Okay. Okay. I've talked to Jen's...
Ooh, I like that. Oh, cause she has one. She has someone that, that she goes to famous, a lot of famous people have a psychic. Have like a good one. Yeah. Like that doesn't advertise publicly. Like, yeah. Cause I think I heard in an interview. Oh my God. You need to stop. Jen got her psychic from Courtney.
I don't know where this person came from. Maybe. Can I get the- And that's Courtney Cox. I really want to get the detail. Then this is someone, a medium who can communicate with- This is not a medium. This is a psychic. Okay, okay. And Stephanie and I both did a session with this psychic. What'd you think? I mean, even if it's not real, it gets you to think about yourself and your life. I don't know, man. I think it's-
So wait, none of us have a story? Oh, I did have a psychic. Wait, is this an interview you read with Drew Barrymore? No, I did my very first psychic ever. I had just come out and she told me I was bisexual. Oh, no way. I was like, click.
First of all, I love the laugh you just did. Fortune just looked at me and went... I click. So I was like, whatever you're going to say after this is kind of...
I don't know. But the government and CIA and stuff used psychics until the 70s or 80s. Oh, for serial killers. Serial killers. In wars. 100%. 100%. That book, The Men Who Stare at Goats, they were conducting psychic experiments until so recently and then they just...
I think it just got a bad PR and they stopped. But I love a psychic. I would go tomorrow if I knew of a good one. I don't trust the psychics with the neon signs. Okay. If you're that good. Even if they have a crystal ball in the window. Yeah. Because if you're that good. Did I tell you about Psychic Sonia? You don't need a neon sign. In Toronto, Psychic Sonia, next time you're there, you got to go just to experience the
the charlatan, the fraudulent charlatan that Psychic Sonia is, you will die. Is this like Miss Cleo? You go on Dundas. She's famous? No. Tiny little shop with a neon sign. Well, she's now famous. Yeah, Psychic Sonia is going to be huge. I went in with my best friend, Jo, and we go in and there's smoke. She's smoking inside, all the windows closed. And in the background, weirdly, she's watching a documentary exposing fake psychics.
So I don't know. This is like. I'm serious. It's. In your psyche. Yeah. And then she gives. She's like, what do you want? Like, she's annoyed that we came in. Yeah. She's like, OK. Act like she doesn't want it. She tells me I'm going to meet my husband in Australia. She's trying to establish my gender like the whole time being like. And so you are friends. What is this? She's like, I really need to get to the bottom of all of this. And then my friend Joe was like, I guess I want to know, like,
people give me advice a lot and i try to and and sometimes i don't want to do what they say but should i like listen to people more like my friends she goes what do you mean he's like i don't know like i don't drink hot beverages i i i don't like coffee and people are always like drinkers she's like what do you mean you don't drink coffee he's like i don't know she goes you need to drink coffee every morning two sugars two milk you need to drink coffee and she's like what do you drink he's like water juice i don't know she's like you gotta drink coffee she was like outrage
And then she said, your friends are not your friends. They're lying to you and they make fun of you behind your back. Was that true? She was a total crazy fraudster. And neon sign? Neon sign. Psychic Sonia. Well, maybe she's not going to be popular now that... I think people have to go for the experience because she...
She was so full of contempt and disdain for us. It was really remarkable. We recorded it. Do you guys remember Ms. Cleo? Oh, yeah. Well, I saw the documentary. Oh. There's a documentary? There is. Is it good? It's good. What was her catchphrase?
There was... What's your... Is she, like, Jamaican? Yeah. Please don't do it. Or maybe she wasn't. Maybe she... I think I remember in the documentary... Wait, what happened? I just said, please don't do it. It felt like... I'm nailing every accent. Launch into... You're not just here, Jersey. I think that she maybe pretended to be Jamaican. Oh, that was fake, too. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Wow. Wow. What if Psychic Sonya's... I don't even know what's real anymore.
Yeah, her name might not even have been Sonia for real. But not one of us have had a psychic experience that really stands out as being like, oh, they told me this thing and did you know that like three weeks later that happened? I do have one that I was present for but wasn't for me. Let's hear it. I'm all about that. Okay. Secondhand news. Wait, wasn't that Miss Cleo's catchphrase? Let's hear it. I'm all about that. There is a catchphrase though. Yeah, there is. What is it? Let me guess it.
call me oh yeah but I won't do the accent it's call me now but but okay I'm with I'm maybe eight no it's already falling apart I'm ten and I'm with my dad and we're in Brighton that like seaside town in England and there's like a pier and uh
It's the 90s and kind of an old school pier still. And there's a little caravan that says psychic. And it truly looks like it's out of The Wizard of Oz. My kids just watched that yesterday. For the first time? No. And we actually went and saw The Wiz live production here in Los Angeles over the weekend. Oh, I got to take. Yeah. Okay, great. Okay, so we go in and my dad's like,
he used to be very mystical, but he's sort of become pretty pragmatic. And so we go in and sit down and there's this old man and he's looking at my dad's hand. He's like, "You are a writer?" My dad's like, "Yeah." And he's like, "So you were living abroad and then you've come back here because your mother's sick?" And he's like, "Yeah." Which is true. And then he's looking at it and then he suddenly looks at me and goes, "Can you wait outside? I'm 10." - Oh wow. - And I'm like, "What do you mean?" He's like, "Just step outside for a minute. I need to speak."
I go outside, my dad comes out 20 minutes later white as a sheet and he has never told me what was said in there. He's just like, I don't wanna talk, I don't know. - Oh my God, we've gotta find out. - Am I gonna get hit by a bus or something? - I think at this point you're pretty good. - You think I'm good? - Well people still get hit by buses. - I know but when they're adults. - I think Mae's all right. - What, how? - Yeah, are you a psychic? - Yeah.
Oh my God. I don't want to tell you guys. Miss Fortune. Miss Fortune. Call me now. Call me later. Leave a message. Well, clearly you said something that was really stuck with you. Yeah, I don't know if it was like... I wish you were here to tell us. I don't know if it was a prediction of the future or...
very accurate about the past but it was I think spot on and I looked for that guy I went back in my 20s and obviously Caravan's still there and then it's so much charlatan I love that I get to say that word charlatan in this episode twice I love that I love you too should we hear Jen's response hopefully she'll have an actual experience I can't wait to hear it
Okay, so the answer to that question for me is yes, I have. I spoke to a medium about four years ago. So much was coming through, so much was coming through, but she said this one thing, a bunch of things that blew my mind, but this one was really incredible. She said, your mom could never compete with her first husband's dancers, right?
So my mom's first husband, my brother's father, was like a big band leader. And he always was having these affairs with women. And my mom was always sort of, you know, quiet and meek. And then she said, but he also wanted her to know that he never recovered from the death of his sister who died in a plane crash. What? That's so specific. So I call my brother.
And I said, I also didn't know his father had a sister. That was the other thing. So I said to my brother, Johnny, did your father have a sister who died? So I don't say plane crash. I don't say anything. And then he goes, oh yeah, Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane, she died in a plane crash. No. That's wild. What? Excuse me? Oh, Aunt Jane, yes, she died in a plane crash. Chills now even repeating the story. So yes.
Wow. Wow. I truly did get goosebumps. Yeah. Same. The specificity of dancers, plane crash. All of it. All of it. I want to go to that. I mean, there's nothing where you're like, I want to go to that medium. Can we get that person's contact? Maybe the night that the private chef makes his dinner.
Jen was like, this is asking a question that's come with a lot of strings. I think the easiest thing for us to do would be to move in, for the three of us to move in with our families and animals into Jen's house. And when she's talking to her psychic, we could pop in the back and be like, what about Fortune's animated show? Is my grandma coming through? Maybe.
Maybe this is where our road trip should be to. Her house. Exactly. The road trip could be to Jen's house. What if I contact my... Wait, the road trip is to Jen's house? Yeah, that's not far. We're going to take a road trip? That's not far. Well, because the rest of the weekend we're going to be at Jen's house having a slumber party. That was a cool story. What if we contact the medium? I talked to my...
and she's like, why are you talking about my problem area on your podcast? And that's the one thing she's mad about. She might be upset about grandma's problem area. We've talked a lot about grandma's problem area. Your grandma's problem area. Yeah, specifically. I mean, that...
Area. Is a real problem. That's all to say, clearly we would go to a psychic. We're all open to it, it seems like. Yeah. And like, I would love to... If you're out there and you're a psychic... Particularly a medium, I would really... A medium. A medium. Yeah. Yeah. Well, my girlfriend...
had someone tell her that in a past life she stole her best friend's wife. She was a guy and her best friend had a wife and the wife was in love with Parv in a past life and then the best friend went off to fight in a war and so then since then the psychic was like that's why you feel you don't deserve love and like you feel guilty about it and you sort of shut yourself off from love because you feel like you betrayed your best friend in this past life.
Yeah. Okay. Well, you could say that to anyone really. But that's another story of someone else's, right? Someone else's and it's not even a... It's on par. I mean, I was the only one that really brought... On par. Oh, no, you brought. What happened? Well, I was going to say I was the only one that brought an actual story from a psychic...
But then I realized you did too. You were every month calling and going, where's my girlfriend? Am I going to find love? Am I going to be in an animated movie? I'll call you in four months to check back up on that. Hi, Fortune. Do you have any other questions? Nope. I just want my love to come home.
But it is funny with psychics when they're like, the words like coconut grove is coming to mind. Does that have any meaning to you? And you're like searching so hard in your brain like coconut grove, coconut grove, maybe coconut grove. My friend Mae is allergic to coconut. And you're reaching for any straw. Yeah, actually, yes, that does track. Coconut grove, yes. What about it? Yeah.
That's the best part about psych is you just want it to be anything. And really all everybody wants to hear is like they forgive you. They're happy. They're at peace. You're like nothing's your fault. And you're the best. Yeah. Well, excellent episode, my friends. What a podcast. What a podcast. I don't know what else we could give.
Is this going to be our final episode in April? We didn't make it past April. I do want you guys to know one thing, though, before we get into the end of the podcast. Oh, what? Oh, my God. What? What is it? Are you quitting? Fortune, what is it? Fortune, I'm scared. I'll be there for you.
I'll be there for you. Wait, how's the rest of the song go? Oh my god. Cause you're there for me too. When the rain starts to fall. And it's raining.
Guys? Wow. Oh my god. It feels kind of medium-y. It feels... I got goosebumps. I didn't. I also genuinely thought... I bet you never thought that life would... Oh, she's gonna listen to me. Oh, Fortune, come on now. Your friend's a joke. Wait, your job's a joke. You're broke. Your friends are. Thank you for having your head shot last night. Thank you. I always beat my pants. Not on my couch. Fortune.
Like it was so close. I'm good. I'm okay. I did it. I did it. Okay. And you sing that like somebody's grandmother in church. I don't know the words. I know, but the... I'm there for you. Cause you're there for me too. Thank you, grandmother.
And thank you to Jen for that awesome question and incredible answer. Thank you so much. One of the coolest answers we've had. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. May, do you have anything you'd like to plug? Buttholes. May!
I'd like to always plug just go on my Instagram you can see I'm always at Largo and you know around the town I'm on a podcast called Handsome yeah check that out yeah I feel like my new special might be out
always yeah hello again yeah on uh amazon and uh i'm going around los angeles doing my uh new material at largo and dynasty typewriter the title of your special i can so hear in your voice too hello again or like hello again i don't know i can just hear it i don't even say it you don't say it in the whole well i don't want to blow it okay yeah i don't say it in the whole special do you say it like hello newman like
Hello, Newman. I don't know what that is. Yeah, sure, sure. What is Hello, Newman? You know from Seinfeld. Oh, well. Anyway, Fortune, you got anything to say? I've never seen Seinfeld. Are you serious? I have never seen Seinfeld. I haven't watched a lot of it either. What? I've only seen like maybe four Seinfeld episodes. This is crazy. I also, like I didn't want, like I feel like I know every beat of the Friends theme song. Like it was
I was trying really hard not to jump in. I assumed you probably knew the whole song. Oh, wait. Can you sing the theme song to Morning Show? I have it in my head. Well, that doesn't help us. It sounds like a... Okay, we have your headshot and resume. You know, it's like the song... No, that's it. The song's like... You got it.
Please can someone on social media take the audio clip of Fortune doing that and put it over the title credits? I have it in my head. But the song is so unique that I can't.
wrap my head around how exactly it goes. Or you could put the Friends intro at the beginning of the morning show. I really need someone to do this with both of the songs. The switcheroonie. Did anyone tell you life was gonna be this way? I can do the Broadway version. Isn't that it? Yeah. Did anyone tell you life was gonna be that way?
Oh my God. Second gear. Oh yeah, second gear. That's in there. I'm on the last leg of my comedy tour. The Live, Laugh, Love tour. I don't know if anybody like Jen wants to come to a show. Yeah. Let me know. Okay. And you can go to my website, fortunefinger.com to see if I'm at a...
Sitting near you. I'll just go to it when I miss you. Yeah, bud. Just go to the website. I appreciate that. I'm also at Tignotaro.com. We have great handsome merch. Oh, my gosh. Do we ever. Pretty little lady sweatshirts, handsome t-shirts. Flying off the shelves. T-shirts, little cowboy hats. Yeah. Yeah. Travel mugs. I'm loving seeing them out. Tumblers, I mean. Out in the wild. Mm-hmm.
You can go to handsomepod.com to get any of that. And people were tagging us before the last holiday saying they were so pumped because they ordered their loved ones merch. Yeah, start ordering now for Easter. Yes, Easter's a big, huge gift giving. Yeah, and also it's really important to know
That you should subscribe. Click the subscribe button. Please. And review us. Give us five stars. Yeah. Share this episode. Especially after this episode. I mean, this is Jennifer Aniston. And it does not get better than that. There's some hot off the press secondhand anecdotes about...
celebrities we read interviews with. We have told so many stories about other people's psychic experiences. It's just a good time. I feel good when I'm around you guys. Yeah, I feel good. Till next time. That's right. Yeah.
Keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! What a podcast!
Hey, handsomes. I just wanted to take a quick second on behalf of myself, May, and Thomas to wish our great pal, the very handsome, the very hilarious Tig Notaro, a happy belated birthday. She just celebrated a couple of days ago, so we wanted to give her some love, and you too can still celebrate our favorite prenatal
pretty little lady with an exclusive OK Dyke TIG sticker that's only available until this Thursday, March 28. If you go to handsomepod.com, you can pick it up with any order and you do not want to miss this sticker. It's so cool. It's that picture of TIG with the long hair fixing the tire. So good. You're the best, TIG. We love you. Happy birthday, my friend.
