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Do I Have a DFK?

2024/11/12
logo of podcast Good Inside with Dr. Becky

Good Inside with Dr. Becky

Key Insights

Why might a child's tantrums seem more intense than other kids their age?

Children with intense tantrums might be Deeply Feeling Kids (DFKs), who experience emotions more deeply and intensely than other kids. They need different emotional regulation strategies.

Why do parents of Deeply Feeling Kids often feel like they're doing everything wrong?

Parents may feel this way because standard emotional regulation strategies don't work for DFKs, leading to frustration and a sense of failure. Understanding that their child is a DFK can provide relief and a new approach.

How do Deeply Feeling Kids react when they're upset?

DFKs often push parents away when they're upset, contrary to typical expectations that closeness would help. This can be confusing and conflictual for parents.

Why do Deeply Feeling Kids sometimes blame others for their mistakes?

DFKs may blame others because they feel deeply embarrassed or upset, and externalizing the blame helps them cope with their intense emotions in the moment.

Are tantrums in an 18-month-old a sign of being a Deeply Feeling Kid?

No, tantrums are a normal part of development starting around age one. It doesn't necessarily mean the child is a DFK.

Can a Deeply Feeling Kid also be neurodivergent?

Yes, there is significant overlap between being a DFK and neurodivergence, such as sensory sensitivities and intense reactions to small stimuli.

Will things get better for parents of Deeply Feeling Kids?

Yes, with the right understanding and strategies, parents can see significant improvements. DFKs, when properly supported, can harness their intense emotions to change the world.

Chapters

Dr. Becky introduces the concept of Deeply Feeling Kids (DFKs) and discusses how parents can assess if their child might be one, emphasizing the need for a different approach to parenting these kids.
  • DFKs have more intense tantrums and meltdowns than other kids.
  • Parents often feel like they're making things worse despite following expert advice.
  • Understanding that the child is a DFK can lead to more effective interventions.

Shownotes Transcript

Do your kid's tantrums seem more intense than other kids their age? Do they come on fast and last much longer? No, you're not imagining it. And no, there's nothing wrong with your kid. Your kid might be a Deeply Feeling Kid. And these kids will learn how to regulate their emotions, they just need a different approach. Today, Dr. Becky gives you the tools you need to assess if your kid might be a Deeply Feeling Kid.Get the Good Inside App by Dr. Becky: https://bit.ly/4egGIjA)For more on the Deeply Feeling Kids Workshop visit https://bit.ly/4ege3KMFollow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside)Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletterOrder Dr. Becky's book, Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be, at goodinside.com/book or wherever you order your books.For a full transcript of the episode, go to goodinside.com/podcastTo listen to Dr. Becky's TED Talk on repair visit https://www.ted.com/talks/becky_kennedy_the_single_most_important_parenting_strategy)Today’s episode is brought to you by Airbnb: Let's be honest, parenting is expensive, especially around the holidays. If you’re traveling over the holidays and have an empty home consider making a little extra income by becoming a host on Airbnb. Every little bit helps, especially during the holiday season! Being an Airbnb host means that you are providing another family with an amazing experience and it's a great way to earn some extra money for all the different things you wanna do. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb dot com slash host.

For more on the Deeply Feeling Kids Workshop visit https://bit.ly/4ege3KM)