cover of episode Erica and Shane: Addiction and Redemption

Erica and Shane: Addiction and Redemption

2023/1/18
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Erica and Shane met at Chili's where Shane tried to flirt with Erica, but she initially thought he was a drug dealer due to his appearance. Despite her reservations, they connected over their shared pasts and mutual interests.

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All right, gentlemen, coming to main stage next. This is Bunny. Get up there. She's got a tornado of titties coming your way. Get those dollar bills ready. She's got an ass that shakes like Michael J. Fox. So get up there and throw, throw, throw them dollars. Dude, that is fucking iconic. What's up, you sexy motherfuckers? Welcome to another episode of Dumb Blonde. Today, we have TikTok's favorite coffeehouse couple, Tiff.

In the house. I'm so excited. Erica and Shane, how are you guys doing, baby? Doing good. How you doing? I'm good. You guys finally made it here. Finally.

Finally. It only took us, what, an extra month? No, it's okay, though. You guys had a valid reason. So I want to tell you guys, my husband asks me all the time, like before I do podcasts, he's like, who do you have coming on today? And he never knows who the fuck it is ever, right? And today I was like, I have Erica and Shane coming on. And he's like...

Oh my God, I love them. Like he was so excited and I was like, you know who they are? And he's like, yes, I followed them. - 'Cause ironically when he followed me, I didn't know who he was. - Aww. - I didn't know. - She did. I gave her the hardest time about it. - I knew one of his songs, kind of, but yeah, no, I didn't. He gave me the biggest. - It's okay, I heard it. I knew who you were.

I didn't know anything about him until I banged him, so it's good. So don't worry about it. Yeah, so I thought that was really cool that my husband was really stoked to have you guys on. And he would have come in today, but he's doing like a five-hour interview with Hulu today. So he wanted me to tell you hello and that he wishes he could have seen you guys. Tell him we say hi back. Tell him we say hi. So how's life? What's going on? Life is chaotic as always. Yeah.

We just went from two full-time kids to three, one being a teenager. So that has been slightly challenging, but also it's been pretty rewarding. Oh, yeah. Teenagers are so fun. Oh, yeah. My bonus baby is 14. And she's an angel right now. Yes. But now I'm like very suspect of her because I'm like, why now? See, that's me. I'm like, why are you so responsible? Why do you have all your shit together? Yeah. I absolutely the fuck did not.

- Yeah, no, when I was 14, I left home and was doing everything that you could do. Anything that anybody told me no, I was doing. - Exactly. Like if you said it was a bad idea, I'm like, okay, so if I do it, you think it's a bad idea, but I think it's a great idea. - Yeah, absolutely. And is it your daughter or? - It's my daughter. - Okay, gotcha. - And so I'm dealing with the whole 'cause, you know, boyfriend and all that stuff. And so I'm having to adjust to all that. - How does that feel about the boyfriends? - I'm not great about that.

He's doing better. He's still considered a friend. Oh, good. That's what I... He doesn't get to graduate to boyfriend level for a while. No, not yet. Not yet. He's got to prove himself. Yeah, but he's a good guy. You're getting better, though, because there was a time where he said he was going to be sitting in the living room cleaning his gun when the boyfriends came over. And he shook his hand. He was really nice to him. Oh.

I try. I try. It's got to be hard seeing your daughter start dating too because you know how boys are. It is, but that's why it is hard because I know what I was thinking when I was 15. So yeah, that's a difficult part.

Yeah. It's so funny because Jay and I are the complete opposite. I'm the strict parent, which you would never think that. And he is fucking fun dad all the time. And I'm just like, yeah. And I'm like, bro, how? What? I'm like, no, she can't fucking do this. No, she can't go out. And then you feel like the asshole. But really, I used to, but not anymore, because literally it has molded her to be such a good little human. And it just like it makes me so happy because I'm like.

I did that. You know, like I can like silently take credit for, you know, shit that she does now. And I'm like, you know what?

Maybe me being so hard on her and him being so cool kind of worked out, you know? Yeah. So, go ahead. No, I was just going to say that's us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Trying to figure out the balance. And you'll find it. Yeah, you guys will find it. Raising kids is a fucking learning process. And I don't even have real kids. So, like, I have a bonus kid, you know? I don't have biological children. And it's a fucking learning process, you know? So I can only imagine what it's like when they are yours. It's like, fuck. Yeah.

Like that's a shit place. If I fuck up, I can give it back. You know, you guys can't give it back at all. I fucked this up. It's my fault. Yeah, exactly. So juggling that and then juggling our business and just life in general. That's been, that's been fun.

It's been fun. It's been fun. It's been, it's definitely been an adjustment, but you know, well, I want good things. I want to learn about you guys. So let's kind of like dial it all the way back. Erica, where did you grow up? Atlanta. Oh, really? You're a Georgia peach. Yes. About 30 minutes North of Atlanta is where I came from. Okay. Gotcha. I actually also lived in Franklin at one point in my life. Franklin.

Tennessee. Tennessee? Oh, cool. So right up the street. Yeah. I love Franklin. We were really excited because I got to get in touch with some of my old roots while I was here. Oh, cool. I don't travel much anymore, so this was exciting. That's awesome. I never knew you lived in Franklin. Yeah, sure I lived. We actually lived in Franklin, yeah. Yeah, but it's gorgeous. Oh my God, it's gotten so much like... Bigger. Bigger and nicer and...

It's great. Yeah, I love that. So growing up, how was your life at home? Tell me about little Erica. Oh, little Erica. Little Erica was a trash-ass human. I grew up with my mom and my dad. My dad adopted me when I was two. My biological father is...

We don't know. Right. Okay, so your biological mom and your stepdad. Yeah, technically he would be my stepdad. But he's raised me since I was two, so he's my dad. He's the only thing I know as far as a father figure goes. Yeah. And so growing up, like, they were really great. Where do we want to start? It's your life, baby. Right from the jump. Right from the jump. So much. Yeah.

You know, things were good for most of my childhood. You know, my parents were great. My siblings are great. Grew up in a great environment. And that's why I always try to tell people, like, I don't know that I necessarily believe that your environment makes you like, especially when it comes to terms of addiction or alcoholism. I don't feel like that's necessarily always an environment thing, because for me, I had all the opportunities laid up.

at my corner if I wanted them. But unfortunately, you know, I went through some things at a young age, a lot of trauma. And we're allowed to touch base on it. Yeah, I mean, we can totally touch base on it. I've gotten I've gotten a little better over the years about opening it up and talking about it. I have. I've got a family member who assaulted me when I was a child. And I was 14.

I didn't have the balls to say anything back then. So I kind of just pushed it down and six months down the road, got drunk, let it out. And basically life just started spiraling out of control after that. One thing I learned was apparently when you're in a...

sexual assault situation, the chances of you putting yourself back into another type of situation and it happening again are more likely. So unfortunately for me, because I chose the party route of drugs and alcohol and numbing, it ended up happening a couple more times for me throughout my adulthood. Not by the same person? Not by the same person, but by other people. But that person in particular that

really started the ball for me. The biggest thing for me is no one believed me back then. My mom and dad believed me, my older brother believed me, but the rest of my family, this man had taken a lie detector test. He passed. Wow. Because I waited so long to disclose

It was a he say, she say kind of situation. So you just got drunk one night and was just like, this is what's happening because it was eating you up inside? No, I actually, I got wasted. My dad had to take me to a hospital to get my stomach pumped because I had alcohol poisoning. Wow. And apparently in the midst of me between getting to the hospital and getting my stomach pumped had let out

Well, I don't know why you're here now. Where were you when this happened?

And that's how it came out then. And so then when that happened, don't get me wrong, my dad's a fucking G man. I mean, he laced up and he was ready to throw down over it. But at the same time, the reality is when you wait that long, it's a he said, she said. It leaves way too much room for speculation. So unfortunately in our situation, it ended up creating a huge divide in our family. You had the people that believed me and the people that thought I was lying for attention. And...

Honestly, there's a lot of my family members that are dead to me these days. I mean, you could call me and I don't really care. I'm not fucking with you, you know? Because as a child, I'll never forget that she called me a liar. Right. I'll never forget that when I did finally come forward and had the strength, which by the way, we don't talk about it enough. That is the hardest thing in the world. Yeah. To come forward with your story and

be able to be open and to be honest about what happened. And then to have people basically make you feel like you're lying, I'll just, I'll never forget it.

I was molested when I was five and didn't tell my parents until I was 12. And when I finally did tell them, my parents didn't believe me. Yeah. So I know exactly how you feel. And that trauma that comes with that. Oh, the anger. Yeah. I mean, the anger, the resentment. Just all of it. I don't know about you, but for me, it was just easier to push it all down, numb it off with drugs, and seek validation in men. Come on. I mean, I still seek validation in men. I've made a living out of it. It's fine. It's fine.

But, you know, I just... I'm a millionaire because of it. But, yeah, I just... I don't know. So that's basically what started my downward spiral there for a minute. There for a minute. There for, like, 10, 15 years. So you weren't using or doing drugs until that happened? And then you just... I wasn't exactly the world's best kid, you know? I wasn't, like, the most respectful or, like, always...

following by all the rules and stuff, but I definitely wasn't using or drinking yet. Right. That was, that happened after that happened. And then it just went downhill from there. The more the family divided, the more that, you know, things started unfolding. Um, the more I secluded into myself and I basically felt like it was me against the world. And I

Unfortunately, it almost took my ass out. Having your stomach pumped for drinking, like you had to have been drinking a fuck ton. So I'll never forget it because I don't drink vodka anymore. I mean, I don't really drink anymore, but I definitely didn't touch vodka after that. It was vanilla vodka. It was an entire bottle. And I was 14, 15, something like that.

Look at me now. Tiny. So tiny. Can you imagine? I was like probably 4'10", like 85 pounds. I don't know. It was...

It was bad. And unfortunately, that wasn't the first time. Right. You know, because I came to find out I was one of those people. I wasn't drinking for the buzz. I was drinking to get lost. Right. I was getting high to get lost. To not feel the pain, but to feel something. To just kind of make everything go away. Yeah. To make it just, you know, this isn't my life. This isn't happening. Right. And then, you know, unfortunately...

This is why I say I'm okay talking about this now this motherfucker did it to my cousin Recently, this was what? We found out imagine how many other girls he's hurt since and that's my thing is no one believed me back then and my cousin is actually the daughter of So, okay. You've got my dad's brother his wife and

His wife's brother is the one that did it. Wow. Her daughter is the one that he also did it to. Wow. So excuse me for standing here today and just being like, fuck you. Like I told you so. I fucking told you. You didn't believe me then. And now look what happened. This all could have been prevented if...

If y'all had just, you know, kids don't make stuff up. So if I can say anything today that gets across to anybody, please listen. When a child confides in you, please listen. Because I don't know if you want me to open this door, but we're going through the same thing with his bonus daughter right now. With my bonus daughter, your daughter. Same exact situation. And it's very upsetting because I'm watching the same thing unfold from when I was a kid. And I'm not going to lie. It's...

It's upsetting. It brings up some fucked up feelings that I thought I was kind of over and...

I don't think you'll ever be over that. It's hard to be over somebody taking away your innocence. Yeah, and then trying to justify it. Right. That was the worst part about it is trying to say things like, well, she put on perfume to smell good. That's so creepy. I was a teenager. Find me one teenager that doesn't like to do things that make them feel good because that's what we do. So things like that and then...

you know, watching her go through the exact same thing and having people

Shed, you know where they feel like they don't believe her or having the family getting divided or all the fighting that just really in my opinion Doesn't fucking matter right now her her well-being matters. And so that isn't it crazy how? Tragedy tears people apart either brings them together tears them apart, but it shows people's true colors It really does. Yeah, it really does You know because at the end of the day

I don't really give a fuck about anybody in the situation but my bonus daughter. Yeah. And justice for her and making sure that she's okay. Absolutely. And unfortunately, you know. Is he arrested? Did he get arrested? Not yet. No. God. Not yet. They're investigating and.

all even though we've provided video proof of things and i feel like the judicial system fails our babies man but i mean it goes it's no different than the drug side of it you know it's unfortunately with our judicial system and the way that it is set up it is set up for repeat customers to keep coming back because that's how they make their money now whatever way that looks like that's just what we've noticed because like when i met you

I mean, shit, this motherfucker was bringing home $100 every two weeks on his paychecks. And that's... I was working 50, 60 hours a week. You know what I mean? And it's not like... By the time child support...

like probation fees and everything else. I mean, it was just set up to fail. Yeah. And never get out of it. My husband's dealing with that because he's a felon. Yeah. And it's just bullshit. We can't even go out of the country because, you know, of something he did when he was 18. Yeah. Or even I think he was 17 and got charged as an adult or something like that. And it's crazy. I mean, it's kind of like y'all were talking about, you know,

With these sexual offenders, they'll go do two or three years, but you get caught with some dope and you'll go do 40 years. You get caught with weed in your automatic fire. Why are you a convicted felon, Shane? I got caught with 20 pounds of weed. So, you know, but I'm a convicted felon for weed. Out of all the things he's done in his life.

And that's what took him out. That's what got me. It's just crazy. Let's dive into that because I want to get down your path of addiction. But let's let's where did Shane grow up? Let's hear your story. So I was born in Austin, Texas. Oh, cool. I'm from Houston. And I spent half of my life in Texas, Oklahoma. But I say I grew up in Oklahoma City because that's where I was a young teen and into my 20s and stuff like that. But I grew up in Oklahoma City.

I was your typical dope dealer, gangbanger, and running the streets and...

Fast money cars all that good stuff. Oh, yeah, that's all I can get money, right? Yeah, but yeah, so I lived up in Oklahoma City for a while and

When things went south in Oklahoma City, I ended up coming back down to Texas. And of course, I still was doing my hustling and selling dope and ended up getting popped with

20 pounds of weed. In Texas? In Texas. Okay, I was going to say Oklahoma. They would... Oh, no. They would have thrown the book at me. My ex went to prison for ghost weed in Oklahoma. Yeah, they would have thrown the book at you in Oklahoma. Oh, fucking crazy. They find it joint. You get caught with dope and money. The money alone is a separate charge. Right, exactly. That's exactly what happened to him. But, yeah, they...

- Caught a felony down in Texas, but my second daughter was born. Well, to go back, I had a daughter in Oklahoma. - Okay. - But she wasn't around really too much. I wasn't around. I was still running the streets, doing my thing.

And her mom ended up remarrying a dude and he's a good guy and he was raising my daughter and stuff like that. And it was one of those situations where I knew what I was. So I was like, she's got somebody raising her. I'm not going to interfere with that because I already know I'm not going to bring anything good to the situation. Well, at least you realize that. I...

I stepped out and he, and he's still, he's still married to her mom and he raised her all the way until it, but she actually reached out to me when she was 16, 17. And we actually have a relationship now. Um, I mean, I was honest with her and told her, Hey baby, I was a fuck up back then. You know, it wasn't anything about you. Not that I didn't love you or wanted to be around. I was just, I was just a fuck up back then. There was no,

Easy way to put that. And she accepted it and she, you know, forgave me for it and everything like that. We talk now. And now he's going to be a grandfather. Now I'm going to be a grandpa. She's pregnant. Now you get to do it right. Yeah. Now you get to do it right. Redemption. When my second daughter was born in 2007, that's when I said, you know what?

I got to do the right thing and get out of this life. I was still on papers and stuff like that. How long did you do it? Did you do time? Uh, I was in there only for about a year. Okay. Gotcha. And then, and then, yeah. And then I did the rest, uh, on paper, um, outside on papers and stuff. But I, uh, when my second daughter was born, I said, enough's enough. And that's when she's talking about, I got a job, but between child support and,

Pay as you... What do they call those places? The fees, they were going to the...

It's literally like they're just like, here. The system. And then I didn't have a driver's license. So I had to go to one of those little pay-as-you-go car places. Wow. They were charging me like $700 a month for a car. But I needed a car to get back and forth to work and this and that. Just no way to get ahead. Right. Just no way to get ahead. But I will say the hard work, the dedication, it paid off. I worked at...

Chili's for a while. I know she hates Chili's. I used to work at Shoney's. They did me dirty when I left. They did him rude. What'd they do? Put him on blast. Well, so I was with Chili's. I started off as a cook and I worked my way up to a manager and you know, I have a

Long sleeves on, but I got a lot of tattoos, facial neck tattoo. And I actually worked my way up to a general manager. Had my own restaurant and everything like that. I went to him right before we decided to open our cafe. And I told my boss, I said, hey, we've got an opportunity. I'm going to open my own place. But I need a month or so. I want to give y'all a heads up.

You motherfuckers called me three days later and was like, we're going to go ahead and take your resignation. You're good to go. They used him at another restaurant. I was on salary. So they cut me off of a month's salary that I was going to use that money to

to try and help offset things in life and stuff, you know? That's what I hate about the fucking corporate world. They do not give a shit. Loyalty, time, none of that. They do not care. They'll replace you with not even the next best thing, with the easiest thing that they could pay less. And like, I don't know. I just feel like everybody's just a number in the corporate world. They totally are. I mean, the amount of nights he sacrificed, weekends that he sacrificed, holidays that, you know, he...

I'm not even going to talk about when I worked there. We'll just talk about when you worked there. The amount of holidays and stuff we sacrificed for them. And just to be reminded that you're just a fucking number. We don't replace you. Three days later, they said. I mean, and so when we opened our place, that was one of our biggest things is like,

When we hire people, you're a part of our family. Yeah. You know, this is not... You're not a number. I'm not going to treat you like you're going to be replaced. I want you to know your value, your worth. Yeah. Because we literally went through it. Yeah. You know, ourselves. Absolutely. Well, let's pivot back. But real quick, why did you get into, like, that... Into selling drugs, being a D-boy? Why did you get into that? How was your home life? Were you close with your family? So, I was...

My family was kind of like her. I mean, she makes a valid point when she says it's not necessarily your home environment that steers you in that direction because my parents, they worked hard.

But again, they weren't at home, but it wasn't because of them doing the wrong thing. It was because they were always working. So they were never home. So we kind of turned to the streets a little bit. And when I moved to Oklahoma City, we came from Kingsville, Texas. So down in Kingsville, Texas, that's a small country town. So when we moved to Oklahoma City,

It was like, whoa, what is all this? What is this? Like, you know, so we started running the streets and then we didn't really have that

home life no more. So then we started turning to the streets is, you know, protection and protection and just the validation and the acceptance of somebody being there for you, even though it's a false picture, you know, but as a youngster, you're thinking, oh, these people got my back. They're here for me. They,

you know, but when really it's just a bunch of kids who are just like, right. And then, you know, it started, the money thing started becoming a deal where it's like, man, I can make, I can go make a thousand dollars today and only put in four or five hours worth of work and I can have everything I want, you know?

And the delusion. That's where my addiction. I grew up in the streets, so I understand it 100%. When I talk about addiction, that's where my addiction started. Okay. Was with the money. Fast money. Yeah. Fast money. I love it. I'm still addicted to making money. So now that we're on the addiction thing, let's get over here to you. So you went to the hospital, got your stomach pumped, all that stuff. Take me on the ride from there. Okay. So there are very many months that are missing. Mm-hmm.

Lots of months that are missing. So bear with me. No, you're good. So it started with that. And then unfortunately, so where he was seeking like the friends vibe and the family vibe, I was chasing my daddy issues. Right. You know, so I was going after just fucking trash. If we dated...

Before I met him, you need to look into yourself because there was something wrong. She's like, I'm a walking red flag. I was a walking red flag, like red, orange, yellow, green, blue, everything. She was a rainbow bitch. Just pretty much. I mean, a motherfucking train wreck. And I wasn't.

I wasn't a good person. So if I was hanging out with you or I was dating you or we were friends, I was using you for something back then. And it got to a point where I felt like I had been done so wrong for so long. I was like, fuck all of you. You know, it's me against the world. And so basically it started off as drinking and it would go, you know, I'd be with this group of friends or I'd hang out with this group of friends or I hang out with this person and

Slowly but surely, that party scene begins with coke on weekends, tripping, you know, shrooms, doing acid. Oh, you want to snort this? Here, take this. Here, do this. Next thing you know, you're in a flop house in fucking Buford, Georgia. Strung the fuck out. Not Buford. Like, what? Golly. I mean, it just, I don't know. Or the amount of times that,

I come to you in the streets and just... I gotta say, I miss drugs from back in the day. What the fuck are they doing these days? Honestly. I'm scared to fucking die. Thank you. I won't even drink at a bar with a bottle that's been opened not in front of me. It's not... You can't. It's too scary of a world. And I think, honestly, that's part of... We know how to party. Yeah. These motherfuckers now, this ain't partying. What is fentanyl? Why are we playing?

with that. I just told the story the other day. Fucking some dude went to the fucking hospital overdosing because he was at a bar, got served a drink that was from behind the counter in a bottle. They found fentanyl in a fucking alcohol bottle in a bar. That's crazy. And that didn't happen. That's gross. We used to do coke in the bathroom stalls on the back of the toilet and be okay. Fuck yeah. I used to crush up fucking Xanax on the back of a toilet. Yeah, but you knew it was

Pinky nails full of coke off a stranger's pinky nail just walking by. And you were good. That's exactly what it was. But these days, I honestly think that's one of the reasons that, not the whole reason, but it's definitely a part in what's kept us off the streets. You don't know what the fuck you're getting these days. Ever. It's not like it used to be where you would go get a dime sack. It's just not the same world that we were living in. The streets used to have rules back then.

Right. And apparently the code of ethics. Yes. Yes. No rules. Nobody has like any compassion, I dare say, or like empathy or regard for human life. Yeah. Like it's fucking weird. Run into that problem a lot. You know, that's like me and my brother were talking the other day, you know, back in the day we would do things. I'm not going to criminalize it, but people used to get robbed.

and not kill. Right. Now, people are getting killed for chains on their neck. Dude, LA and fucking Vegas, well, not Vegas as much, but LA right now, they're just looting. Pulling up on people and fucking shooting them for a watch on their wrist. What's the reason? Because at least back then, we had a reason. I wasn't just trying to like... I was robbing people because I was fucking... I called myself Robin Hood. I would rob from the rich and give to the poor and I was the poor. I was hungry. So I was Robin Hood.

I needed some food and a place to stay tonight. Yes, exactly. No, like, and now people are just, I mean, even like rich kids are fucking killing people just because they think it's like makes them cool. Well, I think that's a big, like we've been having this problem lately when we help people that people don't feel like they deserve the help.

I think something that people got to understand is like, just because that person on the side of the road, you think they're going to go and use your, let's say you give them five bucks. They're going to use your five bucks to buy alcohol or drugs. What the fuck do you think I was doing? Right. I mean, at one point I was speaking, given second chances that I did not deserve. Right. But if I had not been given those, I don't think I'd be sitting here right now. Right. You know, so how deep did your addiction get? Yeah.

It went pretty bad. It turned out my drug of choice was meth. I used to smoke it. See, I used to snort it. The burn I was all about. Not me. I wanted to fucking fly like a kite. No, no. Twist and turn. I knew it was bad.

I'll never forget it. I just told Terry, she works with us at our cafe. I just told her this story the other day. I'll never forget it. Towards the end of my reign, right before I made the call that I was done and I wanted some help. I didn't know what that looked like, but I knew I needed help. I'll never forget sitting there in this motherfucking bathroom at this hotel with a line of dope in front of me. And every, oh, it gets me so emotional every time I talk about it because every ounce of me didn't want to, but I did.

And that was when I realized like, I don't, this isn't a choice for me. This isn't like, I know this is wrong and I'm not going to do it. It had gotten to the point where I didn't have a choice. I didn't want to do it. But at the same time, you're doing it. Right. You know, and the willpower just isn't there. And I'll never forget that same night. I called my dad from the hotel room.

I didn't have a pot to piss in. I didn't have no license. I didn't have no car, no money, no phone, nothing. I lost absolutely fucking everything. I called him and he was like, well, you know, your mom said that we can put you in a hotel room tonight and then you can go to rehab tomorrow. Otherwise, we'll put you in a hotel room tonight and then we just...

Like we got part ways. We're sorry, but like we can't do this anymore. I had broke into their house. I had stole from them. I had stole from my siblings. Just strung out. Just doing, I mean, you're not you. Oh no, especially meth. Meth is like. It changes your whole brain. Meth and Xanax are two drugs. And I used to love mixing them. It's really unsalable.

safe let's not do that I used to do eight balls of cocaine and come down with fucking bars of Xanax dude people are like you can't overdose on Xanax I'm like yes you can yes you can and your heart can stop if you mix uppers with downers and they also don't really tell you about that these days either and I don't know why no they didn't

back then either like they really didn't like preach that to us because I remember I got a prescription of Xanax that was my my drug of choice was Xanax and cocaine and fucking let me tell you I fucking ate 63 of the blue footballs in a 24 hour period I don't even I fucking was so fucked up all the time like so gone it was how am I alive did you end up in a Walmart yeah like how did you

With a bag? Because that's usually where I would end up is at fucking Walmart. No, but I ended up in my car fucking sleeping and my homeboy had to pull me into his apartment. That's a whole other thing. I woke up with him on top of me. It was just so gross. Yes, yes. Drug addiction is just not a beautiful thing. That's kind of what I was saying earlier. And I'm not saying any girl ever puts themselves in the position, but what I'm saying is you find yourself in that position more. You find yourself around predators. Yes. That feed off of how low you are. It's almost like you...

You put yourself around these people thinking they're going to be different. Or safe. Knowing damn well in the back of your head they're not. And I mean, I'll say that's one thing that kept me alive when I was on the streets doing my stuff. Going with my gut. Yeah. When I felt something in my gut, we're out. Yeah. You know? But for me, it had gotten bad. Towards the end, right before the hotel situation had happened, I was like,

I went by somebody's house to see a friend and I got a bad feeling. And so I told my homeboy, I was like, yo, let's go. Like we need to leave. I don't want to be here. I have a bad feeling. Man, we went to open the door. There were guns, cops fucking everywhere. Get down on the ground, get down on the ground. Knees in our backs thrown down on the fucking ground like animals. Now I would like to say I deserved it.

I deserve every motherfucking bit of it. Still fucking suck though. So I need to say that. It's not like I was mistreated by the police. I was not. I absolutely deserved everything that they did to me back then because I was doing it first. You know, the first time I got arrested, 17 years old, apparently in the state of Georgia, you were considered an adult at 17 years old. I hate that. That's the fucking most fucked up rule. Have you seen 60 Days In?

I've watched it a couple times. Okay, the jail they show that's in Atlanta off Rice Street. Yeah. That's the first time I got arrested. That's where they put me. Wow. Gen pop. Dressed out and everything. Lost my paperwork for five days. I'll never fucking forget it. Wow. And that was the first time that I... They probably wanted you to sober up. I think they did, but it didn't work. Oh. It didn't work. Yeah, no, I kept going for a couple more years after that. Oh, fuck. But, you know...

It's crazy because I look back on it and these days like it feels like a different fucking person. Yeah, it's crazy. Do you feel like that sometimes? Oh yeah, we just bought a house back in Vegas and every time I go back there I'm just like who was that little girl running the streets? Yeah. Like who was she? I wish I could just fucking see her and hug her.

Tell her it's going to be okay. Tell them it's going to be okay. Yeah, everything works out. Just keep your head up. Exactly. It's just so crazy, but it's such a beautiful journey that you guys are, that we're embarking on together and that people are learning about you that you could even be here to sit on this couch and say that. Yeah. That's the fucking whole- Mind-blowing. Yeah, full circle thing. And that's our biggest thing that we try to preach to people is, no matter what your past- There is a chance at redemption. No matter what you've done in your past and no matter-

What you've been through. Unless it's hurting a child. You can get through it. And there can be something better on the other side. Absolutely. 100%. And I'm sure I speak for you as well when I say this. But when it comes to feeling absolutely hopeless. Like there just is no...

possible way you can keep going we understand you can yeah you can and for us I know you've got your person I've got my my dad's my homie man you know he took me to rehab he took me to rehab I didn't want to go I got out this is cool this is cool I got out the car on the way to rehab because I didn't want to go to rehab I had changed my mind halfway through and then he came back picked me up then I went to rehab for 35 days the plan was I was getting out and

and going back to their house and moving back in with them. But see, the problem is every time I moved back in with them, I'd relapse. Right. You know, because obviously I wasn't, that wasn't where I needed to be. Right. It was a trigger. Yeah. So they, they, my dad was like, okay, we're taking you to Texas to a halfway house with a bunch of bitches. Oh, yeah.

And I'm like, what? Females? Like I live in a, it's like a sorority house. I don't want to do this. So halfway to Texas, I got out on the side of the road somewhere in Mississippi and started walking down I-10. He came back and got me that time too. We love dad. That man, that man been through a lot with me. He's shown up to trap houses and gotten my clothes back with his little jorts tucked in and his belt and his.

high socks and everything. He showed up, he didn't give a damn. Not the jorts and the socks. We love that. I love that. He would show up, he didn't give a damn. He wasn't scared of nothing. He would show up and he would always be there. And the fact that he never gave up on me and he's not even my biological father, gave me that little bit of strength I needed to be able to push through it. And to be honest with you, had I not left Georgia,

I would have never got off drugs. You had to just get out of there. Would have never got off them. The environment was making you sick. Yeah. Yeah. People, places, and things, man. People, places, and things. And as far as, because I know this is everybody's favorite thing to say, well, I can't just pick up and move across. You think I'd

money I when people say that to me too I'm like I moved with a trash bag of shit and myself no license no car I moved to Texas I moved into the halfway house $500 a month to share a room with three other women and walk they charge you $500 a month oh yeah yeah we in the wrong business right

- Halfway house. - What the hell? - Yeah, so. - That's $1,500 a month for three. - But then they take money from you. - So they didn't at first, they tell you like you can move in and get a job and they give you like a 30 day grace period or whatever. - Oh nice. - My parents ended up just going ahead and paying my first month's rent and telling me, you know, we got you this month, but come next month, you don't got it, you don't have a place to stay. - Right. - And I got a job making like seven, $25, $8 an hour.

walking to and from the mall, you know, and catching rides when I could. Did it suck? Yeah. Was it fucking hard? Absolutely. Did I do the work?

Am I where I am today because of that? Yeah. So did you stay sober? I stayed sober. Hey, good for you, mama. I did, and that was May 28, 2014. Fuck yeah. Go, mama, go. Shane, what about you and your addiction? I heard you say that money was your first addiction. Money was my first addiction, and then I started drinking a lot, and then came the pills. I love a good lorderve. I love a good lorderve.

I love a larder. It's always larder. The blue ones were the best. The little blue footballs, yes. That's why when you said that, I was like, okay. Well, the blue football Zannies is what I was taking. Oh, okay, yeah. I took 63 of the little blue .50.

Zanny. But I do love the blue Lord. Those are my favorite. And the Norco is weird. I've, I've never met someone. So after the peels, I started with the water PCP. Wow. And he really said balls to the wall. I,

Why do they call it the water? So because it's like a liquid, of course. Okay. And you dip your cigarette in it. Right. Oh, no. Listen, I smoked a Sherm stick. So I don't know why. I don't know why, where the water came from. That's what we called it in Oklahoma City. We called it Sherm. Yeah. Is that the same thing? Yeah. Sherm, PCP. Yeah. It was like embalming fluid. Yeah. Embalming fluid. I literally fucking couldn't move, talk.

You can't do nothing. It's like you're in a whole other world. Yeah, it was crazy. It's not fun. For some reason, now I look back and I'm like, what the hell? Because I mean, I can remember times of me and my brother sitting there like we didn't even know what we were doing. Right. Well, no shit. You're high on fucking PCP. Yeah, it was bad. Yeah.

So yeah, I got on that for a long time. Yeah, he said, fuck it. I went from pills to PCP. Like, I'm like comparing over here. Like, I didn't do that. None at all. I mean, none of it's good. But I have to say, I'm like, that's brave. When you say you're trying to escape, I escaped. Yeah.

- Yeah. - I really got out there. - Yeah, I know for sure. - So, but yeah, I did that for a while and then the meth came along and I ended up like her, I was bad on the meth. But the thing with the meth was is I thought, well, this is cool. I can stay up for three or four days. - Production. - And make money. - Mania. - Dumbass. - You know, I can hustle three or four days straight and I don't have to sleep.

But then it turned into a deal where it was more of a need than a want. Yeah. You're using more than you're selling. Well, and that wasn't even really my moneymaker because I did cocaine a little bit, but that's really where I made my money. So I didn't really like messing with that too much. I'd dibble and dabble with it, you know, mainly if some bitches came around and they're like, oh, yeah.

I'm like, oh, okay, my favorite. Let's get everybody fucked up. Maybe I get lucky tonight. Yeah, absolutely. I don't know how people fuck on cocaine. I shit my pants and I fucking can't eat and I'm a weirdo when I'm on cocaine. Unless I'm completely drunk. Everybody who does a line of cocaine or meth, you're taking a big dump. Literally. Right after you do it. Everybody's shitting their drawers. So I don't understand how people think that's a hot drug. No, no. But I...

I did that and so the meth became a big issue for me because I like I said I I was shoot I was probably me and my people we you know an eight ball of meth a day you know just smoking and there were times I mean I've woke up with cigarette burns in my shirt where I've not taken nod naps off and

be up for four or five days and just horrible. And, you know, I ended up, that was right around the time I got raided and got caught with all the weed and everything. And then I got locked up. And then when I got out, I started kind of doing the same thing again. Were you sober when you went to jail? Yeah. So I was sober. And I didn't really too much mess with it because when I got locked up,

I start you know you have that little jailhouse faith yeah like I'm gonna be better yeah so I had that in there but then when I got out of course I started talking to the same people again right and so I started going back down that road again but then that's when my baby mama ended up getting pregnant and my daughter was born and that's when I said you know what

I got to do it right this time. Right. So... Was your baby mama using too? No, she was pretty straight and narrow. She was actually...

That was kind of an accident, to be honest. Not an... My daughter wasn't an accident. Right. No, we get it. But the baby mama... Right. The baby mama was kind of just one of those spur-of-the-moment type things that happened. Right, right, right. And she got pregnant, and it was like, okay, maybe I need to do the right thing this time. Right, yeah, yeah. So I did the right thing, and that's when... For me, it was a little easier because I had my daughter. There's my motivation, so...

Rehab never worked for me. I tried that when I was like 16, 17. And it didn't work. I went to rehab and...

Louisiana. I kept getting kicked out. Aw. Louisiana had... They told him to leave. Don't come back. We had a shroom field over there in Louisiana and we would be sitting there in AA meetings. I would think shrooms would be fucking therapeutic. I mean, we would sit there in the NA meetings tripping on shrooms listening to them talk. So, I mean... Oh, God. I think that would be healing for your brain, though. Right? Because they use it now for, like, depression and for people who are actually going... See, and people ask me why I don't go to meetings. That's why. Yeah. That's why.

- Do you know where you can find drugs meetings? No, thank you. - So for me, rehab didn't work. It didn't work for me personally. My daughter, my kids, that's what got me going. It got me straight. - I love that. So let's keep going with your story. After you went to rehab, you started working at the mall

I started dating the world's biggest douchebag. Oh no. In sobriety. The drug problem is just not the daddy issue. Bro, what is wrong with me? Remove the drugs and alcohol and apparently I'm still trashed. You're an Aquarius. We learned the hard way, yes. So yeah, I started dating this total fucking shit show of a person. That was your roommate, right? Oh yeah. You never shit where you sleep.

No, no, no, no. I called him. Oh, I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I was like, oh, damn it. So I was dating this, this. And again, this goes back to if I was fucking with you back then. Right. It was out of convenience. Right. So, and I love that you can admit that though, because yeah, no, it's true. Cause I learned it when I first got sober with that fucking guy. Um, if you ever listened to this, I don't apologize for it. God damn.

goddamn thing you got what you deserved pretty much so I moved him in to I'm stupid I had my own place and I had a job and I had a lot of things going for me and I it was going well

Except for him. Right. Come to find out this dude's been doing heroin. I didn't know. I didn't know. So anyway, I moved him into my apartment. Like the good girlfriend I was. Yeah. And, um, dude starts fucking around, you know, fucking other girls, hanging out with other girls. Um,

Apparently doing heroin. Didn't know that at the time. So anyway, it got really bad with that guy and he started sleeping on the couch and I was sleeping in my room, which is where he gets the term roommate. Oh, gotcha. I start working at Chili's and this motherfucker keeps trying to holler at me. Oh, yeah.

I thought that I was being-- So you guys met at Chili's? We met at Chili's. OK. From house to back house. What did you think of when she first walked in and you saw him? I was trying to holler. She didn't want nothing to do with me. I thought he was a drug dealer. I mean, he was. Turns out, no, at the time, he had more time clean than I did. Aw.

But she, you know, the tattoos and everything, she's like, oh, he's just a thuggish drug dealer. He looked like him in it. He had a shaved fucking head. All these tattoos, three deep and the teardrops and the sleeves. Come to find out three deep is for him and his two brothers. Alana and Mariah on his neck is for his two daughters.

Half these tattoos I was judging him for were done sober. So it kind of opened my eyes up a little bit to like, hey, maybe stop being such a judgmental bitch because you don't know everything. Don't be a bitch, Erica. Pretty much. And so he kept trying. He kept trying. And I was really trying in my mind to do what I thought was the right thing.

by dating this fucking douchebag and holding on to it for whatever goddamn reason. Yeah. Well, we try to fix people. I think so. Women with trauma, we want a project and we, oh, you're a douchebag? Got you. I could fucking make you a better human. Yeah, I don't. It never works out. And honestly, it almost took me out. It almost took me out because, you know, I'm not going to lie. I tested the waters. That was when I was still kind of freshly sober and I tested the waters and I wanted to know like if I was an alcoholic or not.

And I come to find out I'm,

Yes, I am all of the things for one. Just an addict in general. Just an addict in general because it's not just drugs and alcohol. It's Netflix. It can be sex. It can be not sex. It could be working. It could be being a mom. It could be anything. And I'm like, oh, all in. Let's go. You know what I mean? But sometimes there's got to be a balance between things. But with that guy in particular, yeah.

it's starting to get really bad i started noticing the same things that were happening in my addiction you know cops getting called for domestic violence now i just want to let the record reflect i was beating his ass not the other way around right take that take that sight over there but i mean i was okay let's go backwards so i was arrested when i was 17 um the guy that i was dating back then i had found out i was pregnant um

I didn't know what drugs I had done. I didn't know how much I had drank. I didn't even know how far along I was at the time. So we told, I had moved out of my parents' house. I thought I knew everything and I went out on my own, 16, 17. And when I found out I was pregnant, I was too scared to tell them. So I told his mom and she looks at me, died in my face and she said, don't worry, honey, we'll take care of it. She drives me into South Carolina and

Paid for an abortion. And at 17, in the mind frame that I was in... You thought you were doing the right thing. I really did. I really did. And don't get me wrong. I mean, I would have never met him. I wouldn't have my beautiful children. I wouldn't have the family that I have. But does part of me sit here and wonder? I'd be lying if I said no. Right. You know, but...

Fast forward a little more, I was with a guy that was beating my ass. - Right. - You know, I was with a dude that put me down, that isolated me from everybody, that put his hands on me, that, you know, I'll never forget the time dude put his hands on me while we're driving down the side of the road and I jumped out a moving vehicle. Walked home barefoot three and a half miles to my parents' house. You know, so a motherfucker never forgets stuff like that. So when this stuff happened with, ooh, I almost fucked up. - How could you do a bleep his name?

When this stuff happened with Homeboy, I wasn't going to let it happen. I wasn't going to be a victim again. I had been a victim for so many years. So instead, I became the, what's the word? The offender? Yeah. The aggressor. I became the offender. And, you know, things just got really bad. And I was really glad when he finally, he was on probation. And he had it transferred actually back to Oklahoma. Weird. Weird.

And he left one day. He stole my fucking dog. Ew. Little Chihuahua. I used to put her in sweaters. Her name was Maria. He took her. Not Maria, the Mexican Chihuahua. And even went into my, went into my, she was the best. What Chihuahua do you know? I tried to replace her with Chico, but that didn't work out. This sweet man. This sweet man. He knew I was heartbroken three months after I'd kicked this fuckhead out. And he had taken my dog and went into my paperwork and took her papers and everything. So I couldn't.

say anything because he had everything. What a douche. And I start dating Shane or talking to Shane. What made what made you change? What was like, OK, I'm going to date this thug. God, he's a motherfucker. Persistent. He was a Gemini for sure. Consistency. He just kept and not in a creepy. Yeah. Like pushy way either. He was just. He knew what he wanted. Always conveniently there. Yeah. You know, and I'll never forget his motherfucker went to the animal shelter.

and tried to replace Maria. And he brings home this broken dog named Chico. And don't get me wrong, the thought was great. We no longer have Chico. No, Chico didn't make it. Chico didn't make it, but Shane tried. I tried. Shane tried. That's sweet. Chico had a panty fetish. Oh, God. Bro, he used to chew them all up. Oh, my God. All of them. Not clean ones. She would come home and they would be everywhere. Oh.

She's a fucking dog, man. She gets so mad about Chico. So mad. And made weird noises. Like, you really got a broken dog. I don't know. I mean, he was at the pound for a reason. Right. Somebody let him go. Some happened. At least you tried.

He had a lot of drama in his young puppy life. Okay. Poor thing. So then after Chico, we switched to pit bulls. We should have just stuck that route, you know, because we've all, we both of us have had pit bulls our whole life. So now we've got seven. Oh, nice. Yeah. We've got seven pit bulls and we'll never go back to chihuahuas or whatever the fuck Chico was. So take me to the beginning of you guys' relationship. How was that? Like, did you guys ever slip up together? Have you guys remained sober the whole time? Nope. We have.

been it's how long have you guys been together oh god what eight years eight years now yeah eight years now almost eight no eight years and no slip up well it's about seven and a half so i'm wearing catalina catalina seven that's how long we've been together okay it's already i lose track sometimes but yeah it's been about seven to eight years taking it back to where we met all right so i kicked homeboy out

or he left, whatever, volunteer, whatever you want to say. - Took fucking Maria. - I don't give a fuck. Dude was gone. And Shane came over one day to hang out and he never left. - Oh. - He just kind of moved in. I mean, don't get me wrong, it wasn't like he-- - Did he put it down? Were you like, what were you just finally like, okay, he could stay?

Yeah. Yeah. I love it. I love it. Every possible way this man could fulfill my dreams, it was happening. Oh, good. And not for once it wasn't monetary. It wasn't stuff. It was an emotional connection. It was a person that wasn't judging me, that didn't want shit for me other than my company. Than just you. And then on top of that, just...

the motivation that he's been bringing to the table for the last almost 10 years is just unmatched unmatched you know but when we first met he moved in and then uh i told him what did i tell you i told you i wanted when we started getting a little serious i was like i want a a ring

a house and a baby, right? Those are the three things I asked for. - Yep, that's what you said. - Three things I asked for. - You got all three. - Not in that order though. - Not in that order, but you-- - So first he found a house. - I think they went backwards. - They did. First he found a house. And don't get me wrong, our house was the cutest little blue house, red door. But it was only two bedrooms. - Right. - Okay.

Our life is such a fucking shit show. So Shane has his two older daughters that were living with his, whatever the fuck you want to call her. Baby mama? Baby mama. Trash. They were living there and then Shane had another baby, a little baby girl, whose mom is, we're not even going to call her that. So Shane, you have two or three daughters?

I've got five total. Oh, you've got five total. Okay, gotcha. I've got five total. So the daughter that I'm talking about now is actually... She's mine now. Oh, okay. She's mine now. Her egg donor is a...

she's you know I've I've learned to have a lot more sympathy for this girl over the years I'm not gonna lie there's still probably gonna be a time where we meet in the yard right you know for all the things that we've we've been through we're gonna have to hash it out in the front yard at least once yes at least once but for right now she can't get off heroin she's got a lot of mental things going on um

And despite every bone in my body, I hope she gets right. Yeah. Some women just weren't meant to be moms. But there's going to come a point where Catalina grows up and goes looking. Yeah. And I just want her to know that I hope she does the right thing by her. Yeah. You know? But regardless...

CPS calls one day. He was in Louisiana, Louisiana working. I was at home and he calls me and he's like he was on a trip opening a Chili's in Louisiana. He was a corporate trainer at the time. And he's like, hey, CPS just called and my daughter's being removed and placed with us. And I'm like, oh, hold on. I forgot something. We found out I was pregnant. Oh,

Right before that. Like two days before when we were moving into her house. And so he tells me this and I'm like, oh, okay. All right. So what do we need? You know, she was nine months old at the time. We got nothing. She came just her. So we went to Walmart and we bought all the things that we could possibly get for baby, you know, because babies need formula, crib, bottles, toys, diapers, wipes. I mean, it was, it was a lot. And honestly, I,

she gave me my purpose so yeah I had been sober before I met Catalina and Shane but until I met Catalina I'm gonna start crying I'm sorry because I feel the same way about Bailey I I just for her it's a little different because I chose to be her mom you know with Jackson I mean yes we chose to be parents and have him and I love him and he's my son and you know but with Catalina I

I got to make that choice. Yeah. You know, and then unfortunately... You got to show up like your stepdad showed up for you. Yeah, yeah. And so unfortunately, we tried to let her egg donor be in the picture at first, but she just...

Cause more trauma. No, you throw some rope and she'd just keep hanging herself. I mean, it'd be a couple inches and she just, I don't get me wrong. She caused a lot of drama, but it was more the drugs and the guys and the lifestyle she was around. She was nine months old, taking her out to parties at one o'clock in the morning. Yeah. There was, there was a lot of suspects of abuse. There was apparently a lot of CPS history with her other two kids. Um, so it was a clusterfuck of things. Well, you know how to pick them, Shane.

For real, bro. I've got some crazy ones. Third time's a charm. Yay. You got it right. You fucking got it right finally, Shane. I had an addiction. It's fine. It's fine. I guess.

It's all right, baby. Eat that up. But yeah, so at first she was around and then she wasn't around. And so I will never forget it. There was a day where I had to make a choice. She needed to call me something. And when she called me mom, I didn't correct it because that's all she knew was, you know, I was on...

That was... Let's do it while she knows. Yeah. Still to this day, the woman owes us like for a dollar a day. You too can sponsor one of my children. She owes us like $20,000 in child support. She's not seen her in four years. Four years. Something like that. Hasn't asked about her. She hasn't even...

about her in four years. She hasn't seen her in probably six. Five or six. So as far as Catalina knows, I am all that she knows because I'm the only person that's been there. Now, don't get me wrong. She went through a lot of trauma when we first got her. You could tell she was being left alone in a crib because she

You could just tell. If you shut a door, she would scream. She was not cool with men being around. She would freak out if a man was around. So she was basically my little homie. I mean, we were just ride or die all the time. He worked daytime, I worked nights. So when I was working, she was asleep. But during the day, like, we were just, you know, and we did, we created this...

this amazing mother-daughter bond and she taught me how to be a mom. Yeah. You know? Before you were a mom, really. Before I was a mom, while I was pregnant, while I was like, you know, adjusting, don't get me wrong, Alana and Mariah, which are his older two, taught me how to be a bonus mom, but their mom is still in the picture. So it's a little different because... You got to be the fun person. I got to be the fun weekend parent, you know? But with Catalina, I had to actually be...

I'm on. Don't get me wrong. I made so many fucking mistakes. Shit. I'll never forget. There's just all sorts of things. I've made all sorts of mistakes. No, I get it. We got full custody of Bailey like two months after Jay and I got together. Her mom was a heroin addict.

Left for five years, so really all Bailey had from seven years old till just recently, her mom came back about two and a half years ago, got sober, was me. And when we got Bailey, Bailey didn't know how to brush her teeth. Bailey didn't know how to wipe herself after going to the bathroom. Bailey did not know how to sleep in a bed because she had grown up in a trap house pretty much. And she would sleep in a chair every night full of laundry. And then she would take care of her other two younger cousins that were...

at the house. Like she never got a childhood, you know, got to be a kid, right? She never got to be a kid. And when we got her full custody, I know exactly what you mean when you choose to be that parent figure for that. Cause I had a stepmother that was so abusive and so fucked up to me that that was one of the reasons why I hate that word. Stepmother. I hate that. I don't know. She was a stepmother. Yeah. Yeah. But it sounds like, you know, so where it's justified, it's justified. That's why mine. I make them call me my bone, their bonus.

mom yeah i'm like you're my bonus kid yeah well so with bailey when bailey calls me mama bear and like that was her choice that she wanted to call me mom i was always cool with being bunny i never wanted to take her mom's place like that because i knew

That one day Felicia was going to get her shit together. And we're so happy she did. And, you know, I really hope for you guys' sake and for Catalina that her mom gets her fucking head out of her ass. We hope so. Kids are so special. I think it's hard also, though, when you mix drug addiction with mental illness. Oh, yeah. Well, they go hand in hand. Yeah. And you don't have a support system, which unfortunately for her, she just doesn't. Yeah. She doesn't have a bunch of people in her corner. And she's...

the shit on the street these days. I mean, the last time she relapsed, I genuinely think it just,

fucked her up in the mental hospital yeah i mean she just did some bad dope and didn't really come back from it you know yeah so and yeah you don't know what you're fucking getting on the street no ever no yeah for sure so i mean it's it's it's been a rough road um so we went we went from that and then you know we've we've had our two for shit we've gone from upgraded house to upgrade house because we just keep adding bodies into the home you know that's the part of

having a relationship with our family. So it's like great but it's like shit I just want a home. So we finally bought our first house what three almost three years ago. Almost three years ago. Good. And then of course it's not big enough now. Oh no. It's fine. Well we added a little guest house now to it. And so that's where our 15 year old. You guys need some property and just start building barn dominiums.

That's basically what we did. We got about three acres out in the country and we added a little guest house. Okay, no, it was my shipping and receiving department for coffee. Right. That's what it was. And so I renovated it and I got it all set up with all the cutesy things and then this happened and so now we're back in the living room. Right. It's all right though. But it's okay because you know what?

It could be worse. Yeah. So take me on this journey with you guys getting on TikTok and, you know, start. Did you guys do the coffee before TikTok? No. Okay. So take me on this journey. Okay. So my husband found you guys first. Yeah. Like you guys got it, you know, and the weird part, this was not planned. This was never TikTok to find out.

About what the teenagers were doing. What the kids were watching. Yeah. I just wanted to know. And then I started seeing some of the influencers that they were looking up to. And I was like, what the fuck? Oh, yeah. Why are we watching? Scary place. Holy shit. So then I was like, okay, well, maybe if I do some of the videos with them, you know, maybe...

maybe I can be a better influence not an influencer just a better influence for them right next thing you know me and him just dicking around making videos online turned into like viral what the fuck happened it's crazy that was so weird it's so weird I literally posted a video last night talking about how my vagina smelled like tuna fish and it got two million views right it's never the one I'm like really everybody

pussy smells i'm like god and everybody's like ew i can't believe you said i'm like it's a fucking joke like it's not really what i meant but if you actually put effort into it and try oh it doesn't work and honestly so i will say tiktok has been very detrimental to like makeup for me because i used to do makeup and in my lashes and my hair and my nails and everything and these motherfuckers had the nerve to tell me i was pretty without it so if

I mean, bitch. Let's go. I wish I could do that. I can't. You guys don't want to see me when I wake up in the morning. So I'm not going to lie. My cocky son of a bitch ass was like, okay, well, I'm not wasting money on that anymore. This is the first time I've worn makeup in what? It's probably been...

I don't know. A minute. I love it though. But we opened a restaurant and so we live and breathe. So did you open there? Okay. So we talked about, we talked about the restaurant back when we first met at Chili's. We've kind of been talking about it our whole relationship, but we were too chicken shit to like go for it. Yeah. And then, um, I had right before we opened the restaurant, I was traveling a lot.

And so because of me learning about the TikTok and making the dance, the TikTok, what the fuck? That was, that dated you. The TikTok. It's not you, it's me. But I started using that as an outlet because I started, I was really lonely. I was traveling for a job where I was basically on the road. It would be like two weeks on, two weeks off, one week on, one week off. And I'd be in...

anywhere from Detroit to California to Michigan. Yeah. I mean, just Detroit is in Michigan. It's fine. See, you see how much I get out of it. And you know, so I was, I was just constantly on the road and I was lonely and I was starting to just feel it. Yeah. Just really feel it. And honestly, TikTok helped me learn how to be okay with myself. Right. Be okay being by myself. And then not only that, but like,

man, I found all these adults on there. I found all these trashy adults that are just like us. And I'm like, okay, so these are my people. And I just kind of was like, okay, well, can I be a better influence for the people that, you know, that are on here?

and so i just want you know and what i've been trying to do since i did start going forever i just want to normalize real life right you know not everybody's life is glamorous not everybody's life is butterflies and blowjobs i wish it was yeah but it's not maybe not butterflies and blowjobs but like mountain dew coffee we need to make that merge or you should make that merch make that

merch we got that merch life's not all butterflies no yeah but just put butterflies and blowjobs keep it simple people know exactly what it is I just I don't know I I wanted I wanted people to know like we're not glamorous people you know we live a very normal life and what we do is no different than what everyone does you know yes we do monetize on social media but most of that goes

It just gets donated. Yeah. Me and him have lost everything so many times. We don't live like that anymore. Right. As I sit here in my champion sweatpants. Did you see my new slippers? I did. I checked them out. Look at that pocket. I totally checked them out when you were sitting here. You can put stuff in them. So, you know, I don't know. It's the little things for me now, but. So take me on the journey with the restaurant. You guys had always talked about it. And then. We always talked about it. And then about.

Two and a half years ago. I was miserable traveling. And so we... And I was working all the time. And you were miserable working 60 hours on salary. And then my dad passed away. His dad passed away unexpectedly in 2020? He was only, you know, barely 60 years old. Wow. And it just kind of got us thinking like, you know, life, you know, I mean... Tomorrow's not promised. Tomorrow's not promised, you know. And we always were about the security because...

We had the job security. I was on salary. She was making good money. But we weren't raising our kids. Other people were raising our kids. So, yes, our kids had everything they could possibly want. And our bills were definitely paid. But at what cost? You know, nobody was happy, you know. So we were like, you know what? Let's just roll the dice. We don't have a lot to sink into it. So there was a building.

right in our town that was going to be an Italian place. And then it just didn't work out, I guess. They just never opened. So he called to find out more about the building and they were like, no, we're trying to sell the building and they didn't want to do it. And he comes home and he's like,

we're going to do it. And I'm like, are you fucking crazy? Let's do it. Come on. And I was like, okay, all right. And so then we tried to hide it from everyone. So we tried to pretend like we weren't going to do this because we knew how crazy it was. Were you just scared of like, it was in the middle of COVID.

And let's be honest, everybody, family, everybody was like, y'all are fucking crazy. Y'all are fucking stupid. You're a salary. Why would you give that up for this? You make good money. Why are y'all doing this? Like, don't do this. It's not, it's stupid. Right. And we were like, you know what? It's not y'all's life.

It's ours. Yeah. We're going to do it anyway. Yeah, let us fucking do what we want to do. So we really did. We threw all our eggs in one basket and ran. We threw it all in and ran with it. Haven't broken too many, just a few. You know. You guys' food looks fucking amazing. So good.

I'm so proud of them. I'm so proud of them. Shout out to Armando, Josh, and Terry. We are really proud of you guys. No, it looks amazing. But yeah, we, you know, we gambled on it, but it's been hard, but it's been good. It's in Lake Hills. It's about 30 minutes outside of San Antonio by Medina Lake. Okay, gotcha. Yeah. Yeah. And then the, so I bartended prior to my last job. And so I kind of wanted to do that again because I always had fun with it. But,

going back to the addiction and everything, how am I going to promote something that I don't even do? Right. You know, and I don't like being around people that are drunk and stuff at this point in my life because I'm not about that way. I've been sober since 2017 off pills, 2018 off alcohol. So anytime I see drunk people, I'm just like, it's annoying. Yeah. When you're

sober and they're drunk it's not it's like I'm just like I look like that for some years I pretty much won't I just it's not my type of scene right we've grown up you know we're kind of just not trying to be around it plus it's also very toxic for people like us because the first time maybe not but second third time the delusion starts coming right you know yeah and so we the other thing is is in our town all of the restaurants that are currently there are bar first food second

And...

With the exception of the Mexican restaurant. I feel like they're a nice mix. Those Mexicans, they're always on it. Love that food though. They always got it figured out. But that was the thing. I told him, I was like, there's not really anywhere for a family to take their kids. Or how about the fact I'm driving 30 minutes every day one way to get a decent cup of coffee without having to make it at home. Well, then I ended up making a coffee bar in my bedroom.

And then we decided to open this place and we're like coffee bar. Yeah. And so basically I just, I posted a Tik TOK one day and I said that, um, I was looking to hire only felons because we wanted to give somebody a second chance that I knew probably wouldn't get one somewhere else. And Terry, which is our front of house employee commented and was like, um,

my husband's not a felon, but like he's, he's looking to get on his feet and they've been with us since day one. They still work for us. They're, they've become part of our family. I love that. Their sons become like, you know, our little God son. And, you know, we love Edison to death. And, and,

Then along the way, we've introduced new characters to the story and everything. We finally got our convicted felon. Woo, go Armando! Yeah, Armando! We're rooting for you, buddy! You took one for the team! We are rooting for you! Love that. I love the underdogs, man. I do. I love the people that are down and out and don't see a positive light because to be that for somebody that was for me or for him honestly beats every experience hands down that I could ever imagine.

describe. I mean, just to watch somebody's gratitude and watch them pull themselves out of the trenches, just, just from giving them a little bit.

You know, you don't do everything for them, but you give them just what they need. Yes. The world needs more hope. The world needs more hope. A little tiny fucking gram of hope can really brighten somebody's fucking day. And I think people forget. Some people just need a chance. Yes. Just a chance. And I think people forget that these are human beings.

Beings. Yeah. Despite whatever the fuck that they have done in their life. Right. And how they've gone to the point that they've got... That is still a person. Yeah. You know? And...

I don't know. I just, I'm all about the underdog, man. Because no one ever wants to give them a chance. I love how you deal with the trolls, too. I see you clapping back all the time because I clap back. It's always the same type of fucking people. I told her I saw your post the other day about middle-aged men. That's her biggest pet peeve. The middle-aged men. Like, you know you're at home with your...

Like I wouldn't even talk to you on the side of the road. You know, you whack off to giraffe porn, fucking animal geographic or whatever the fuck, you know, like, bro, who the fuck are you? You know, it's always some dude named fucking Mike or some dude named John. Or like both of you do assume

that anyone was even fucking talking to you. Or how bold of you to assume that your opinion even holds any weight in this court. Yeah. I got a man. I've got a dick. I don't need another one. Thank you. No, for sure. And I mean that both metaphorically and physically. I mean, like, he's an asshole. But I love it. My husband's been a dick this week, too. It's all right. But it's okay because you know what? You know what, Azeem?

at the end of the day I think everybody thinks I'm just this nice sweet human being I'm a fucking psychopath I'm like no I didn't I never thought that yeah no you're crazy I was like real recognize real I'm crazy it's fine I mean I've got I've got good moments but I've also got I'm a good follower of anxiety you're just blunt and take no shit there's no point in skating around just fucking tell me how you feel

Yeah. Maybe it's not me. When people call me and they're like passive aggressive or fucking don't do that around the bush. I'm like, just tell me what

get to the fucking point what the fuck my kid will call me and she'll be like so how are you I'm like what do you want yeah what is it let's cut to the chase you're not calling to find out how I'm doing you need something so just say you need it and I think that I think those trolls hurt me the most like my feelings hurt me the most is the ones that are like oh I thought you were so nice and you're no I'm a fucking

bitch. Yeah. No, somebody said that the other day. I thought, Bunny, I thought you were better than that because I clapped back at fucking Travis Tritt for fucking talking shit about my husband. But very nicely and respectfully. Yeah. There's a way to do it. Absolutely. I'm never mean when I clap back, but I will fucking hit you where it hurts. But I'm not going to sit here and just close my mouth and not say nothing. And I'm not going to not have my man's back. Yes. And we're at this weird

weird phase in society these days where I think people they accept a lot of disrespect. Yeah. No stand up for yourself man. Just to keep it cool. Everybody's so scared of being cancelled or whatever. I don't give a fuck. I cancelled myself last year.

Last year, I beat you all motherfuckers to it. So you can't, you know? No, we had merch that said cancel me or cancel my ex. I joke around about it all the time. I'm like, please, you can't cancel people who actually have people who love them. You know? Like, nobody ever really gets canceled. It's just a whole fucking phase of people talking shit for a few days. Don't get me wrong. You know, like, we try. My biggest thing, and I'm sure you'll say the same thing, is we're trying. We got a lot of bad karma.

you know we've done a lot of really fucked up shit stepped on a lot of people over the years correcting that we're trying to you know and fuck i went to get i went to academy what was this like three days ago oh yeah and nobody better let my son listen to this but i got my son an archery set his first one for his birthday it's a big target and everything they gave me a bow that wasn't mine so i went back in and i was like yo like y'all gave me this it ain't mine and the guy's like i'm not fucking

not fucking going home with this. I have to sleep tonight. Yeah. I know I didn't pay for it. It's stuff like that that we try to do because at the end of the day, I'm the one that's got to sleep tonight. Right. And I'm already going to have enough hard. You're just trying to do the right thing. Yeah. And so it's just, it's just little things like that. Trying to put one foot in front of the other, consciously making those decisions that eventually it becomes second nature. Yeah. You know, because if you had asked me 10 years ago, if I thought I'd be sitting, I'd

where I'm at right now, I would have laughed at you. You know, you're so, you're so, I think you guys are turning your, you guys have been putting in the work and the universe can see that. And you guys have stayed sober this entire time. You guys have done right by your children. You guys have done nothing but try to correct everything that you guys have done wrong. So everything good that's coming your way to start manifesting, putting it in the air, you know, just speaking positive. That's our biggest downfall.

Yeah. We feel like we're trash. So we're like, you could be trash, but you could be positive trash. I like that. You know, I'm trash, but I fucking will manifest the fuck out of some shit. We'll be positive. I'm telling you. I'm telling you. I'm a trash bag. I am a dirt ball. But I fucking will manifest the fuck out of my life. Because naturally, I'm not a nice person. I have to. I have to. That's what I tell everybody. I'm extremely violent. Yeah. I want to beat your ass half the time.

have to say, not you, but like people in general, like you say, and I'm like, no, if you listen to my podcast, I talk about it all the time. I am very violent. I came from violence. I have been through nothing but listen, are you listening? Yeah. I grew up in the street, so it was killer be killed, you know, and it's a survival tactic, but you can still manifest your life. And I think the best thing that you could possibly do in your life is no matter how

you feel you don't deserve it because of past mistakes, you do. And you've got to start projecting that because the earth, the universe grabs everything you say, you know? So when you say we've got a lot of bad karma coming to me, nope, return to sender. We've got a lot of good karma. You guys have put in the work, dude. He always says the same thing is he's like, you'll be the first one that can give some great fucking advice, but you can't find it. Yeah. Cause it's hard.

It's hard. It is hard. It's very hard. Sometimes. But you deserve it. And I want you to know that. And you got to work on accepting the fact that you deserve all the good that's coming your way. We're getting there. It's like, I know I'm a badass bitch, but sometimes I don't feel like that. No. Hello. We don't wake up. Trust me. And then some of these people crack me up because they're like, well, how do you get up every day? Because I have to. Because if I don't, six other families are affected by it. Yeah. You know, I don't really have a choice. Right. Does every day do I wake up with a smile on my face? Absolutely. Fuck not.

Do I yell at my husband every morning at 7 a.m.? Well, I would too. Who the fuck wants to be up at 7? Who opens a breakfast place when they hate? I hate the morning. I couldn't do it. There's no fucking way. My husband is on this kick right now where he just got off tour and now he wants to fucking wake up at 7 and 8 in the morning. And I looked at him. I said, honey, I've been with you seven years and every morning I get up at 10 a.m. I'm not changing.

It's been that way this whole time. Don't come in here like a bull in a china shop just because you're fucking off tour. She hates it because I wake up bright and early and I'm all happy, ready to get the day going. Why do that? Our hormones aren't even awake yet. Especially until I have coffee. What the fuck? Don't talk to me. How do you even have a full-on conversation? I'm a rough one in the mornings. You are great. You're fabulous. I would be lost without you in

I think you guys really compliment each other. Yeah, total opposites. He's like calm, cool and collected and not a psycho. And I'm the opposite. I heard crazy pussy is the best pussy though. He's like, obviously look at my track record. I don't, my addictions. I love it. So what does 2023 hold for you guys? What do you guys, do you guys have goals, plans, anything?

We have so many dreams. Have you guys ever sat down and done a vision board? We do have actually, because we were actually talking about it today because we're actually thinking, should I say about us relocating? Speak it in the universe. We're thinking. We're thinking. It's a thought. Put it in the universe. So we thought, because all her family lives out here. Tennessee, Georgia, all of it. We need breakfast places out here. So...

We have played with the idea of maybe trying to relocate out this direction. Please do. We need breakfast places. We'll promote it for you guys. We'll do whatever you guys need. Unfortunately, I mean, I have my mom and my brothers left, but most of my family's gone. You know? But she still has all her family, her brothers, her sister, her mom, her dad, her

So we've thought I've wanted to come out here because of the fact that, you know, life is short and I would like her to be closer to her family instead of being so far away. She's so sweet. See her parents not too often. It'd be nice to come out here. And actually, that's my focus. You and Jelly can hang out. He needs a buddy. He needs a friend. He needs a friend, too. So does Jay. So they can be best friends. I just I miss my alone time. But then here.

Because before, you know, we worked all the time. So it's like we were in passing. Time together was a lot more special. Now it's like, okay, can you go watch ID in the fucking living room? Because I'm over it. Listen, you guys don't even got to say anything. My husband's been off tour for a week and I'm like, when do you go back on tour? Because you've got your life. Don't you have something to do? I had to tell him that. I'm like, honey, our house is a well-oiled machine with or without you. I said, so just come on.

in and don't cause waves. You know, like, let's go. Well, then that's our job. We're coming in and making splashes. Oh, for sure. I mean, that's what you guys do. We're coming in to fuck the whole house up. We're pissing everybody off. Yeah, absolutely. And then once we got everybody pissed off, then we're gonna leave. Yeah, exactly. It's bullshit. No, they get to do

whatever they want. Just utter chaos. Like we don't already live in utter chaos, you know? But it's, I'm glad it's just, it's probably a man thing, I guess. I don't know. It's not a Shane thing. It's a man thing. So you guys for 2023 thinking about relocating? We don't know if we're going to relocate or if we're going to get, we don't know.

We've just started the conversation. We've also played with the idea of maybe doing like a food truck, coffee truck type thing. Where we could go to the 50 states. Kind of like how the musicians do tours. Yeah. We could do a tour. Right. And we could just kind of tour around. Because she gets a lot of people...

You know, a lot of followers and stuff like that. They would like to meet her or stuff like that. Or the people that want to try the coffee, but they can't maybe necessarily make it happen. It'd be nice if I could just show up at some of these people's neighborhoods and be like, yeah, what up? You want a bag of coffee? I'm here, you know? And also one of our roasters, we're about to lose one of them.

Long story. The other one is... What's a roaster? They roast our coffee for us. So they take the raw bean and then they turn it into the... Powder? No. Are they actual coffee bean? So a coffee bean raw is green. Wow. Or like a tannish color. And then they turn it into the brown when they roast it. Never knew. And one of our roasters is in Macon, Georgia. So we'd like to be closer to that roaster because they're...

They've just been so great to us and everything. Macon's pretty close to here, isn't it? It would be a weekend drive. Right. Four hours. And again, my parents live in Georgia. So it'd be like, I could go drop my kids off where they could spend time with grandma and grandpa and I could go get coffee and then come spend the weekend with them and then go back or whatever. But, you know, our employees have all told us that they're down for the count. They want to relocate with us. None of them are stuck in stone staying there. So, yeah.

We want to make sure we're giving the opportunities to them also. Right. And I don't ever want to just settle and be comfortable. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't want a big, lavish lifestyle or a big house or nothing. That's just not me anymore. But I know the power behind social media, as we've all seen for however long you've been doing it. I've been doing it about two years. I've been doing it probably about...

12 and to watch people just strangers. Yep. Help total fucking strangers expecting nothing, nothing in return. I would like to be able to do something with that more. Right. And where I'm at currently is,

It's hard. I just feel like I'm kind of not where I'm supposed to be. Right. If that makes sense. You gotta, you gotta be comfortable with being. And it's been pulling at us, you know? You gotta be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Mm-hmm. Making decisions like that isn't easy. No choices have been made. No decisions have been made. So if you live in our town, don't, don't worry. We have, we're thinking of you. We're not gonna just up and go. Right. Um, but we, uh,

Something's pulling at our heart. We just don't know what yet. So we're kind of trying to figure that out for 2023. I know we went from two full-time kids to three. Yay. So that's awesome. We got a grandchild. No, I don't. You do. I'm Erica. Oh, you're going to be G-Maugh.

I'll be Erica. That's okay. She's like, that's when I want to be Erica. I'm not even 30, so I am absolutely not a grandmother. I'm Erica. Hot guilt. You'll be a guilt. So, yeah, that's pretty much what we got going for. Maybe we'll actually get married. So you guys aren't married. Okay. So we have the marriage certificate. Right. It's half filled out. Oh.

The only part that didn't get filled out was, you know, where the preacher signs it and all of that. We just don't have that part. All right, so I'll let you know if you don't know out in the world. When you go to get married, you have to go get married. You got to get the certificate. You got to fill out the top part. You got to pay, like, whatever they charge you. Then you got to go to somebody else and have a witness and, like, an officiant, and they got to marry you. Do it in Vegas. Then you got to go back.

And refile it. And have that shit filed inside. We didn't do all that. No. The first time you go to the courthouse, get your marriage certificate, you go get married, then they file it for you. What the fuck? That's what Jay and I did. So we've been half married. And we can go to the casino while we're there. We have a house out there you guys can stay at. November 2020, I think, is when we got half married. So I keep the certificate. It's something we want to do. It's just every time we go to do it, it's...

Some curveball gets thrown or something. Time. Well, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Well, and honestly, until I met him, I didn't even want kids or marriage. You guys are pretty much common law married.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. You got to file for that in Texas, apparently. You can't? You have to file. You have to file that too. You got to file some kind of paper that like, yeah, it's stupid. So I'm like, okay, I'll be your half wife. Yeah. You know, like, I don't.

You guys got the kid. You guys are good. I feel like at this rate, seven dogs, however many motherfucking kids, all the house, the business. I feel like you're... We're good. This is a commitment, you know? I love it. I love what you guys have. I think you're adorable. So, I mean, I don't know. It's been a crazy road, but...

It's been super rewarding. The social media thing, I don't know, has really clicked for either one of us. When we opened the cafe, definitely not before the cafe. Now I'm scared to go in public because people always come up to you. And who the fuck am I? You know? I don't know. I still see myself as just this normal person.

regular person that's no better, more special than anyone else. So, you know, now that we have the cafe and people coming in and like, man, the things they say sometimes, I'm like, really? You think that?

Like it just makes you want to cry sometimes. I don't know. Like people, like I said, strangers just doing things for sure. I don't think people are spirit though. People can feel your spirit, you know, just like you, just like if you see a TikToker that's shitty, you can feel their spirit. And when you see a TikToker that has a good soul, you can see their spirit, you know? So people can feel you. They know your intentions are good. They know you're not a bad human. So why wouldn't they love you? It's just strange. You know, it's just, it's a very, uh,

I'm still going to wear my 2005 Hollister joggers. You know, I'm not going to change me. That's what she said the other day. She was like, I'm showing up in my sweatpants and my slippers. This is my only time I get to relax is on my podcast. Like there's sometimes Mimi has to tell me to get dressed. She's like, bitch, you're not wearing a hat and a hoodie again.

She's like, why? Like, it's so like, you know? And so, I mean, that part's been an adjustment and the people. Just always be yourself. That's kind of what I'm trying to hold on to. Like, despite anything that may change, like, I just want to be me as I sit here with a full face of makeup. I just want to look pretty today. You're fine. I had time.

I understand, though. Everybody comes on the podcast all dolled up, and I love it. And it's the only time that I'm in sweats. No, I'm with it, though. But I don't ever have... In the mornings, I'd rather sleep that extra 20 minutes than put any bit of makeup on. I mean, I do mascara, but that's about it. Here...

Like, so what are you going to do today? If I'm not filming, I don't know if you guys follow my backup TikTok. My backup TikTok, I am fucking homeless. I love it. 24-7. What is it? My phone's off. It's oh, hey, it's Bunny. Yeah, it's just oh, hey, it's Bunny. That's my TikTok that I vlog on, that I literally just wake up and talk to the camera. And people love that.

Yeah. No, it's crazy. You know why? Because 90% of the human population right now is watching this or listening to this in their joggers and their hoodies and their makeup face. And if I'm not filming or touring with daddy or we're not doing a show or whatever, I am literally at home fucking homeless.

literally fucking t-shirt no makeup unless you tell me I have to right I'm kicking and screaming why would you you know it's a waste of no everything it's how you have to be yeah for sure well I want you guys to come back on the podcast I love you guys a story and I can't wait to see where it goes from here plus it gives us an excuse to call

Yeah. Well, I mean, if you live here, if you guys live here, it'll be easier to get you back on. I know, right? That's true. Why don't you guys shout out where everybody can find you, your socials and stuff like that? Um, I didn't know we were supposed to do like cool usernames. So mine's my name. Yeah. And then you got, of course, uh,

Out of the way cafe. Out of the way. If you go to ericaripkin.com, you can find everything. You can find everything. You can find all of it. Mine's not creative. Mine's Shane Warman. When was the last time you made a social media post? I don't even think I'd try posting. If you need to find me, you can find me over there.

Yeah. That's what Jay is. Jay is so bad with posting. You can find me over there. Yeah, no. He's horrible. He was like, well, how can I help, you know, because I don't have a social media manager. I don't have an assistant. I don't. Me either. I run all mine. Except for the dumbplot page. Mimi runs that. Well, yeah. But I don't do any of the... I don't have any of those. So if you see me posting on social media, like, it is...

He doesn't post for me. No. It is me. I'm a control freak. Yeah. Don't fuck with my shit, man. Because like today I tried to post a lovely picture of me and him eating at this lunch place. Guideline violation. Why? They said that I was, what was it? Spam. Spam and pretending to be somewhere that I wasn't or some shit like that. Did you?

No, it was literally a picture of us eating at the 55, 50. On Facebook? Yeah. Oh my God. I can't stand that. The dummy shit. The dummy shit. It was like at a restaurant in Franklin. My butthole's on fucking Facebook. And it's fine. And it's fine. I know. But we're eating a bowl of gumbo at the restaurant. And it smelled fine. So then I thought, I was like, no, no, no. It was the queso. It was the queso with the brisket in it. So then I was like, okay, well, I'll be a smart ass. Did you appeal it?

Yeah, obviously. And then did they give it back? No. Then I made another post because I'm me and fuck you, you know? So I made another post. Be careful because they will take your page. No, it's a different picture. Okay. Same place. More food on the table. Oh God. And I'm like, I said something along the lines of like, since you're claiming I wasn't here, here's more food. Right. They took that shit down.

Are you serious? Somebody is reporting you. Has to be. That's exactly what it is. So I'm like, okay, well, I guess I'm not a foodie then. And are you sure you're, are you sure that you're appealing it right? And no, I'll have to see it. Let me see it. I don't know. You know, because like when I get them, it's always something like on TikTok, when I get guideline violations, I'm usually like, okay.

Yeah, yeah. Because there's a lot of times she'll do a video and she'll post it and I'll be like, you're fixing to get a guy line. I usually private it to avoid it, you know, but...

On Facebook, man, they really just... No, it's the Wild West over there. What the fuck? Literally, I went from like... I went from 75,000 to 800,000 since last November, right? I figured out a trick with building it with the reels and stuff like that. It's the reels. And then fucking these motherfuckers fucked with the algorithms and now reels barely get any fucking thing unless they're like certain... Like, officer...

Udi he fucking gets So many views Mama taught she gets so many Views on her real stuff like that I think you have to be like A special person for them to do that I get fucking hit some fucking Troll said something to me I told him he looked like a Fucking ramen noodle and oh my god I Remember you telling me that because I said something About how I was calling someone a jalapeno popper Yeah you mess you're like don't do that

I'm like, be careful. I called someone a ramen noodle. Don't do that. I'm like, uh, babe, she got the guideline violation for calling somebody a gnat. For calling someone a gnat. And it said in her, she sent me the screenshot in the violation. It said,

But yet there's people just trolling and tearing. No, you can't refer to people as an animal, as an animal or object. Oh, what about food? That's harassment and bullying. So the more, you know, God, yeah, no. Facebook is just, I went from, so just saying, I went from that to fucking barely even been being able to get views on my reels. Very engagement. I was grounded for like 60 days.

Yeah. Where like I was getting like a hundred likes on a post with 800,000 people. Right. They had me so shadow bound. It was so bad. Well, and I was pissed there for a while because I had a personal profile, but I've had that one, you know, since Facebook came out. So then I,

I didn't... Every time I got a guideline violation, you run the risk of losing your account. Yeah. So then I got scared. So I made a Facebook page. And that one... The profile I had at almost 200,000. But then made the Facebook page and started totally over. And...

And I use, I'm logged into his account. So if I fuck up, he loses his Facebook, but I don't lose mine. Right. But what's weird is, so I'll tell you all about it whenever we get off here, because I'm not telling everybody all my fucking Facebook secrets. But you guys got to promise me that you're going to come back. I want you guys to come to the podcast. We will, for sure. We will definitely come back. Yes. All right. And thank you guys so much for tuning in to another episode of Dumb Blonde. I will see you guys next week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.