Audra is considering cutting ties with her mother-in-law due to the chaos it causes in her marriage. She feels her mother-in-law has no genuine interest in their children and uses them as pawns to control her husband, Jesse. Additionally, her mother-in-law only wants to see the kids when it’s convenient for her and insists on bringing her boyfriend, who makes Audra uncomfortable.
Jesse acknowledges some of Audra’s concerns but feels parts of her description may be exaggerated. He recognizes that his mother has changed since dating her new boyfriend, becoming less connected to him and his siblings. However, he struggles to fully confront her about her behavior, though he agrees she needs to earn the right to be involved in their family.
Audra describes her mother-in-law as manipulative for withholding Christmas and birthday gifts for their children unless Jesse brings the kids to visit her. She uses the gifts as leverage to force visits, which Audra sees as a lack of genuine interest in the children.
Dr. Laura advises Jesse to be blunt with his mother about how her behavior has changed since dating her boyfriend. She suggests Jesse tell his mother that she needs to earn the right to be involved in their family and that contact will be limited until she returns to her previous self. Dr. Laura emphasizes that Jesse’s primary responsibility is to his wife and children.
Since dating her new boyfriend, Jesse’s mother has become less connected to him and his siblings, acting more like a “zombie” and less present in their lives. Jesse notes that her behavior has shifted significantly, and she no longer shows the same level of interest in their family.
Audra is ready to cut ties with her mother-in-law, but her husband Jesse is not ready to end it despite the chaos in their marriage.
Call 1-800-DR-LAURA / 1-800-375-2872 or make an appointment at DrLaura.com)
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