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cover of episode self-love, cycle syncing & feminine energy ft. rebecca leigh

self-love, cycle syncing & feminine energy ft. rebecca leigh

2023/4/7
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Rebecca Leigh discusses her journey from high school anxiety and an unhealthy relationship with fitness and nutrition to discovering holistic health and becoming a certified holistic nutritionist.

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Hello, my beautiful friends, and welcome back to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things spirituality, self-love, and personal development. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a two-time author, content creator, yoga teacher, and entrepreneur. You are at the right place if you're ready to tap into your gifts, unleash your potential, and become your higher self. It's time to claim your power.

Hey guys, and welcome back to the Claim Your Power podcast. I'm super excited for today's episode because currently I have the amazing Rebecca Lee on with me on the podcast. She is so great. I've been following

her on TikTok and seeing her journey. And it is so cool to finally have her on the podcast. So thank you so much for joining me today. I'm so excited. Oh my God, of course. I was so excited when you reached out and asked me to come be a guest on the pod. I love your TikTok as well. So, so excited. So the first question I wanted to ask you is about your journey as a holistic nutritionist. Like how did you get to where you are today?

Yeah, I mean, that's a loaded question, right? I feel like I could talk so much about my journey, but I'll try to keep it brief for the time being. Long story short, back when I was in high school, I started developing anxiety.

I started getting really into the fitness world and I started getting really into health and wellness and nutrition. And I started learning about things and, you know, working out a lot, you know, coming from a good place, but that quickly turned into an extreme. And I was going way off the deep end of, you know, over-exercising binge eating, having an unhealthy relationship with myself, with food.

And it kind of was like a wake-up call to me because then my body started developing some issues as a result of that, like gut health issues, hormonal issues.

internally, mentally, I wasn't feeling well. And so I think through that process, I learned a lot about holistic health and like holistic medicine and healing from the inside out. And that really like sparked my interest. And I, I fell in love with it and I kept learning more and learning more and, you know, kind of going down a rabbit hole of everything, holistic health, just from everything that I've struggled with in the past. And,

And over time, that passion kind of grew. And I decided to get my holistic nutritionist certification. And here we are. Long story short. Amazing. So what is one piece of advice that you would give to someone that's kind of in the position of like your younger self from high school? Yeah. I guess if there was one thing I would say is that

Don't be afraid to ask for help and don't be afraid to go to others for guidance, whether that's, you know, a family member, a friend, someone you trust, anyone, any sort of coach, just asking for help. Because I think back in the day, I didn't really know. I didn't know what I didn't know. I didn't know what I needed help with. I didn't know what was going on. I was kind of in denial about the fact that I maybe wasn't in a good place. I didn't want to think about it like that.

And so if there's one thing, if anyone is struggling right now, who's listening is that don't be ashamed to speak up and to ask for help and to, you know, really work on this because it is something that a lot of young women struggle through and it's just not talked about enough.

Yeah. And I feel like also when you start to open up about it, you start seeing how so many other women were going from like a similar thing or have gone through something like that in the past. And you just start realizing that you were like never alone in it. Because I think you feel like you're very alone in those moments. Exactly. Like when I look back at

moments like that that were similar to me, you just feel so alone and you feel kind of like ashamed to be vulnerable and talk about it because you think that either somebody wouldn't understand or they would like belittle it or invalidate it.

And I think at the end of the day, also, it's so cool to see people like on TikTok and on Instagram finally like being open and vulnerable and like sharing their journey because it helps so many other people that are going through the same thing but are scared to speak up. Exactly, exactly. Once you kind of open that door, you realize that you're not alone and it's so helpful to have community in that way.

Right. And so you got your holistic health coach nutritionist certification. So what would you say is like the number one thing you heard, like you learned from that whole training that you take with you today? Yeah, that's a great question. I feel like the training that I went through really was taking a holistic approach, which I loved, obviously, you know, it's holistic nutrition, but it's more than just calories, macros, you know, protein, fat, it was a lot of like,

Here's how your mental, emotional, spiritual health all play into your physical health as well. And how everything in the body is connected and how you can use food as medicine. And there's certain foods and things you can use to really heal from the inside out. And you don't need to use, you know, pills and put band-aids on whatever's going on. But the main thing that I really loved was the holistic approach and that everything in the body is interconnected. It's not just

physical, like eat this workout done. There's way more to our health. Right. For me specifically, like I was just thinking when you were sharing that story, I like, I look back at like myself three years ago and I

I was struggling with like an ovarian cyst, cystic acne, just also like in constant anxiety. And I went around for so many years, just like not understanding that there was such a big correlation between like mental and emotional health and physical health. So I'd go to all the doctors who would want to prescribe me birth control and antibiotics and Accutane and just all these things to basically cover up all the symptoms that I was having.

And one day I just went to an acupuncturist who just awakened something within me. Like she awakened like this whole health journey for me because not only did that heal me like the acupuncture and all the herbs and stuff, but she also like awakened something emotional within me. Little random story, but like at the time I was going through a really hard breakup and

with a long-term boyfriend and I remember just like going to one of the sessions with her and she was like putting points in for like a bunch of different things and then I told her if she could put a point for a broken heart and she put one in and I just start like bawling and like I'm not somebody who would just like randomly cry in public that's not very me and I just like start crying and

She was telling me like, that was like me physically like releasing the pain. Like it's all so correlated. It's crazy. Wow. Wow. That literally gives me the chills thinking about it. It's so true. Like this stuff is not woo. It's, it's a part of, you know, our overall health. Yeah. Like your emotions impact you so much more than you think. And I also noticed that like

it's all like vice versa. Like when you start doing healthy habits and eating good, you start feeling good. Like days where I would like just eat really like unwell and I would not take care of myself and I wouldn't get enough sleep at night. And I was just disconnected from myself. Those are days where like I would experience constant anxiety and like constant overthinking and like brain fog. Like it's all so connected, but it's not talked about enough, especially as

women, this is like leading me to something that I wanted to ask you about is cycle syncing. For instance, we as women, like in society, we're just taught that like, we need to live like a man, like a nine to five when our hormone cycles are completely different. Like our hormones fluctuate throughout the month. We're by the moon and

It's crazy to me. So I want you to talk about it. I would love if you gave. Yeah, we need to talk about cycle syncing. I love talking about this. It's so important for women, but just a quick note on like emotions before we go past that. I just thought of something is that something I don't think is talked about enough is that

emotions are just energy in motion. And the problem with nowadays is that we hold on to emotions. We don't let that energy pass through us. We hold on to that anger, that sadness, that guilt, that shame, and that resentment, all of these very low vibe, heavy emotions. We hold on to it as women. We really, really, really do. And the problem is that they're coming out with more research now and people are coming out and doctors talking about this, that

the root cause of a lot of diseases can be pinned back to stored emotions. And it's really crazy when you think about it, like stored traumas, stored emotions, it's the root cause to dis-ease in the body. And so if we can move past these emotions and just learn how to cope with them and deal with them, we'll be feeling overall a lot better. I know that for a fact.

Yeah, there's a book. I didn't read this book, but I heard about it. It's called The Body Keeps the Score. Yes. Is that what you're thinking about? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not. Did you read it? Do you want to like, no, but I just know it's a book that like talks about like how your body stores the trauma and how like you think you can heal stuff emotionally, but your body stores it like your, your subconscious mind, you're on autopilot and

It's so fascinating to me. Like I wish I need to learn more about it, honestly. Yeah. The body keeps the score is a good one. The emotion code is also a good book that kind of talks about this stuff if you're interested. So yeah, definitely. It's an interesting topic that I want to even do more research on too, but.

Cycle syncing. Let's get into it, right? Yes. I feel like cycle syncing has taken like TikTok and Instagram by a storm these past, you know, six months or year, however it's been. And I'm so happy that women are kind of finally like,

awakening to this because when I found out about like just my cycle and the four phases of my cycle so your period follicular phase ovulation and luteal phase that's like the four phases your hormones fluctuate throughout the month in each of those phases in a different way

Once you learn about those four cycles and how you might be feeling during each phase, what workouts are optimal to do during each phase? So for example, on your period, you might be working out differently than you would when you're ovulating. Ovulation is when estrogen and energy levels are at a peak. On your period, they're at their lowest of lows. And so once you start to look at your body as almost like a...

like a monthly clock instead of like a daily clock because that's the difference right men operate on a 24-hour cycle like the sun their hormones they you know go in a cycle 24 hours each day new one new one new one women are 28 days like the moon and so once you start to look at your body in that that way that flow you kind of tap more into your feminine energy too right because you're

You're not fighting against it. You're not trying to push it into some mold. You're not yelling at your body. Why aren't you, you know, working out and doing this HIIT workout seven days a week every single day like that man is? Or why do you need more sleep and rest on your period versus other times of the month? It's like you start to look at yourself differently and you start to have a newfound respect and appreciation for your body as a woman because you're celebrating your body as a woman, not as a man.

a shit man in this society. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're not trying to force you to be a worse man. You're trying to celebrate your womanhood and femininity as, you know, we should be. So I'm very passionate about this. Yeah.

I love that. No, honestly, it's very true. Like I was just thinking to myself when you were saying like, why do I need more sleep on my period? It's so true. Like I'm at the end of my period right now. Yesterday, I usually don't sleep above like eight and a half hours. I slept for 11 hours last night, just like kept sleeping. And honestly, it's so true. Like

throughout the months you fluctuate and also your emotions fluctuate too. Like you can tell like when you're ovulating, you're more social, you're more open. It's a good time to like start projects, to meet new people. When I'm on my period, like I'm in a hermit mode, like I'm hibernating. I'm working through a lot of emotions. And like, that's the beauty of it. I think of being a woman is like, you're not supposed to be a man. Like, to be honest, like I

don't personally align with like the whole feminist regime that it's turned into because it's like I don't think that I can do every single thing that a man can do and I don't think that a man can do every single thing that a woman can do and I think we have different traits and qualities and energy that we each offer into the world and I think the reason so many women are burnt out

out and confused and stuck is because they're trying to fit themselves into a narrative and a patriarchal world when they need to be a woman preach like we need to get rid of the term girl boss because it's just not doing us any good it's just not and like I hate to say this too but

I've done research on this and women's bodies cannot handle as much stress as men's bodies can. Like we are not operating in a way that is optimal for our bodies in today's society. Like we are not able to tolerate as much stress. Like for example, right now I am, I've been working through a hormonal imbalance with my functional medicine, holistic doctor for like at least seven, eight months now. And I just had a meeting with him yesterday because I

My periods were getting better. I used to have really bad PMS and periods. And then last cycle, it was worse. And he was talking to me about it. And he's like, you need to make sure that you are not stressed. He's like, whatever it is you're doing, you need to be tapping into your parasympathetic nervous system that rest and digest state more often, or else your PMS, like your progesterone levels during that time, your PMS will be worse and your periods will be worse. Like we are just not meant to

to be doing the same things as men and we need more sleep than men. And I think that is all something to be celebrated. So I agree with you. I don't think it should be, you know, men and women are exactly the same. No, I think there's beauty in both being celebrated in their own ways.

Yeah. So you mentioned feminine energy. So I'm glad you mentioned it because I'd love to talk about that too. So what's like, let's talk about, let's start off feminine energy with like dating. What's like your whole stigma on that?

Yeah, I mean, listen, I think this can really show up differently for everyone. I don't think there's necessarily like a one size fits all mold with feminine energy, with dating in general. Like I think that everyone is so uniquely different for, I can speak on my experience and my personal beliefs and outlook is that I used to be somebody who lived more in their masculine energy. And as someone who was living more in their masculine energy,

I was attracting counter, you know, my boyfriends, whatever at the time who weren't as much in their masculine, right? It's the polarity. So if you're a woman and you want someone who is more in their masculine, is taking initiative, taking control, you know, making the plans, taking care, like just more of that masculine energy, you need to make sure you are in your feminine. You have to be aligned within yourself

to allow that masculine energy to come through. And that's what I think a lot of women struggle with nowadays, as we were talking about, is that we're in our masculine a lot. With work and school and just in general, that's what kind of is praised nowadays in society is masculine energy. Feminine energy isn't as productive or whatever it is. So with dating, I've had to make

a huge shift within myself. And this is something that I've been working on and I'm still working on is learning how to kind of like relinquish that control and allow the masculine counterpart to show up in that way by me being in my feminine. And

Somebody who I've talked to a lot about this is a woman I brought on my podcast. Her name is Margarita. She's an amazing episode on feminine energy and dating in that way. So if you guys are interested in that, definitely listen to that episode because she was an amazing guest. But it's definitely something that I've been working on. I don't know if you can relate at all. No, definitely. Like, I feel like everything you were saying was so in sync with me too, because for so many years in my life, even in relationships,

I was in my masculine energy because I wanted to control it. And I didn't realize for so many years too, it was stemming from like my lack of stability and self-worth. I've realized that like, it's not black or white or all or nothing. Like you can come and be, you know, when you're working on projects that you like or like content creation or whatever it is you're passionate about, like you can be in that masculine energy and like make money and like go after your goals. But I think

Again, what you said, like if you want to attract a man that's connected to himself, that's like in this providing, taking initiative mindset, that type of man is not going to be attracted or like gravitated towards a woman who's taking that initiative in the relationship.

And I was listening to, I don't even know who this was. This was just on YouTube and I was listening to this video and the guy was talking about how like men are natural born hunters and they're like biologically conditioned to hunt and like pursue and go after what they want. And so, yeah.

it was really interesting. Like, I don't know exactly my perspective on this, but I'll just share that he was basically saying that like a man who's like less in his masculine energy and like can't go out and pursue and, you know, go after what he wants is the equivalent of like a man that would not survive in the wild, which I thought was so funny because it's kind of true. Like men are born to hunt, like it's biologically in them. And he was also talking about how

when a woman pursues a man, she, when she gets rejected, she takes it very, very much to heart. Like it hurts her emotionally because a woman will pursue a man from like a place of love. Like she'll want something, an emotional connection. And so when she gets rejected, it's like a big hit to her ego and like to her heart. But a man, um,

Usually when they start to pursue, he was saying like they pursue for like the flame, like the like hot and cold, the connection. And so they're at a club, they pursue a girl, she rejects him. They'll just go and pursue like the other girl. And I'm not saying like men wouldn't get hurt if a girl they liked rejected them, like not at all. But like men, that's how like they're biologically built and women aren't.

And so I think that's why, at least for me, like when I would pursue men, then I would get rejected in the past. Like it was just so painful. It was so painful. Yeah. I mean, it goes against nature, you know, it's not necessarily how we're biologically built. Like, of course you can do whatever you want. And if you're a woman listening and you like playing more of that role, like go ahead by all means, like you don't have to do anything that you don't want, but

I think also another important note to think about, you know, especially like for myself, like I'm a business owner and like I am in my masculine energy and more of a day-to-day role. And if you're a woman who feels that way, like if you're in your masculine with work or school and you're trying to figure out like that, that balance when it comes to relationships, I saw a creator talking about this on TikTok. And she was saying that, you know, when she's with her man or a guy,

she turns it off. Like her masculine, it just turns off. And then she like enters her feminine. I think that's so interesting that it's like, you don't need to be all or nothing. Like, I feel like I can still be, you know, in my healthy masculine with work and getting things done and whatever the case may be. But then if, when you're in dating and relationships and situations like that, turn it off, put on a switch,

Enter in your feminine. Like you got what I'm saying? Like you can have both. That's the beautiful thing. It's like the polarity. It's not like you need to be just sitting at home all day, you know, waiting for some man to walk in. Like you can still do things. Yeah. Turn it off, change it. Like when you're in that environment, if you, if you're wanting more of a masculine man.

For sure. And it feels good. Like I think once you start being in your feminine energy, you just like attain this like deep sense of peace and you start, I don't know, you just kind of feel like a little scary and then things just start coming to you. I've realized that when the feminine energy is all about just like flowing and going through life and the masculine is all about like action. And I think like so important to like have that balance, like it's not all or nothing, but,

And at the end of the day, I think for me, I've realized that like feminine energy is also all about loving yourself. Mm.

And knowing that like you are deeply inherently worthy of being loved. That's what it comes down to at the end of the day. Like if this doesn't come down to like the type of relationship or like how much money your man makes or how much money you make, or if you split the bill, dah, dah, dah. Like it comes down to, do you love yourself? And do you believe inherently that you are worthy of that true love too? Yeah.

So true. That is really what everything boils down to. Like if you really are in that state of like love and self-love, then everything else will kind of flow in your life too. What would you say like self-love means to you? Like how do you practice self-love?

Yeah, great question. I think self-love, it's complex, right? I think it's more than just bubble baths and telling yourself everything's good and just being happy-go-lucky with yourself 24-7. I think it's deeper than that. I think self-love really comes down to doing the things that you know will be best for you, even in the moments when you least feel like doing them. And so what I mean by that is,

Those moments when you're down, right? I really believe the greatest form of self-love is picking yourself back up, hyping yourself back up, going to the gym, meditating, cooking yourself a good meal, whatever the case might be, is like really having that deep sense of self-love within you

regardless of what's going on. And especially in those moments when you least feel like doing those things and you feel really down or you're not in your best state, because it's easy to practice these things right when you're feeling good. It's easy to say, I am beautiful. And it's easy to do these things when you're feeling good. But when you're not feeling good, where does that self-love kick in? Do you love yourself enough

to push yourself, to motivate yourself, to be there for yourself, even in the moments when you might least feel like it. Your spiritual practice, whatever it may be, it comes to actual play when you are going through the hard times because it is so easy to like get up and practice gratitude and meditate, go to the gym when like everything in life is all good and jolly.

But the true challenge and like the true connection you have to yourself is like when times are hard, how do you speak to yourself? How do you pick yourself up when you're down? How do you remind yourself of your strength? And to be honest, like that's something that I feel like I'm going through in my life in the past few months is like,

Going through like moments of uncertainty or moments where I'm feeling low and showing up differently than like a past version of myself would because there were moments in my life where like I would just be so easy to like give up one thing would go wrong and I would just like scratch everything off, but.

That just one more thing that just reminded me, I don't know if you saw this TikTok because it's been going viral, like all over the My For You page, but it's this guy talking about how his therapist taught him

that no matter like what time of the day it is you can always start your day and it was basically saying that like you find the little things that bring you joy in life and whenever you're having like a bad moment you bring yourself back up so he was saying like he was having a bad day but he really enjoys like a class a glass of white wine so he made a white wine and then he was drinking it and that created a whole domino effect so it wasn't a bad day it was just a bad moment and

And like being able to do that and pick yourself up is so powerful. I love that. I really love that. That's such a good reminder that it really is a catalyst effect too. And it is momentum. And maybe it starts with just one kind thing that you say to yourself, because I get it. Listen, I've been there too. I'm going through it also, like trying to figure out certain things and, you know, maybe not everything is going according to plan, but it's reminding myself that,

I am always on the right path. Like just keep going. The only thing that will be bad is if you stop. And so you have to like really pick yourself up. You have to work on that self-talk to know deep down that like,

it's going to turn out better than I could have ever even imagined as long as I keep doing it as long as I keep reassuring myself and talking kindly to myself because you can go one of two ways you know things go wrong as they do in life or maybe they don't go according to plan or maybe it's not as amazing as you thought you can either go one way and beat yourself up about it and go how how could you do this you're so stupid what what your failure this is it done or you can go

This is a learning lesson. You are doing great. You are capable. You're on the right path. It's just a matter of time to keep going. And you can follow that. Like there's two paths. There's always a choice that you can take. And the choice that you make is going to determine where you end up. But it's normal for things to go, you know, to go wrong or to not be going the way that you thought it would. You really just have to work on that self-talk and have enough self-love and like inner self-

It's like your self-identity almost. Like if you say to yourself, I'm the person who is resilient and never gives up and knows that good things are coming to me. If that's your identity, then you will always follow that path. But if you have the identity of, oh, I'm stupid or I'm never going to go anywhere in life or whatever, your reality is going to reflect that in every way, shape and form. So it's really getting to that root self-identity and that self-talk that I think makes the biggest difference of it all.

Yes. And one more thing is like trusting the process. That's personally in my life, the past month has just like been a lesson in faith and like trusting the universe and believing that like every single like thing that doesn't go right, that goes out of plan, that I get rejected, that this doesn't work out, that this doesn't work out. It's like the universe just loves me so fucking much that it's steering me in the right direction. And I feel like in my life, just like,

to be honest, like things have been a little chaotic. Yeah. I've just been embracing it. Like I've been calling it cosmic chaos. Just the chaos is happening for a reason. And every single thing that doesn't work out is happening for your highest good. Even if it doesn't seem like that in the moment, I just, I firmly believe in that. Me

Me too. Me too. I believe in that so much. My mantra that I always tell myself is that everything always, always turns out better than I could have ever even imagined. And that literally keeps me going through the hard times because I agree this month or two has felt like chaos. I don't know the start to this year. I feel like I'm just kind of going through like a transition period, which can be super uncomfortable, but I know it's so worth it. So I'm more so just like excited for what's on the other end. Yeah.

Yeah, no, I'm the same. I've been working a lot on like, I think the biggest thing for me is like a battle with myself. Like, do you ever just feel like your mind is just like constantly chattering and it's like your ego? Do you feel like that? Yeah, yeah. I feel like the biggest thing for me in that way is identifying what is just the ego and like the monkey mind and what is actually the

And that's something I like work on a lot with my clients and my group coaching girls is that you have to start identifying that voice in your head because 90% of the time, it's just ego. It's just fear. It's just old patterns and conditioning and beliefs that are coming up to the surface now. And so once you can start to have like an objective lens on the thoughts in your mind and the chatter, and you start looking at it in a way that's like, okay, that's just what I'm doing.

society's conditioning. That's just a belief that's from my past. That's just fears and doubts that's coming up from the ego. Or is it my truth? Is it coming from my heart center? Where is it coming from? Like start to have a different lens on that voice in your head, because the problem is too many of us get stuck thinking that that voice in our head is the absolute truth. Like this is the end all be all. If I feel this way, or if I have this thought, that must be true. And it's, it's not always the case.

It's honestly like a lot of our thoughts that we think aren't true. They're past conditioning, inner child wounds, things that people have told us. And I'm reading The Untethered Soul right now. I don't know if you've read that book. But in the book, yeah. And he was talking about

How, if you're able to discern a thought and then let it go in the moment, instead of going down this loop, you will attain such a deep sense of peace. So like, usually like we'll have one thought that will come to mind and then we'll go down this rabbit hole. Suddenly you find yourself like down in your worth, your value, your entire life purpose. When you could have just looked at that thought and thought to yourself, okay,

I see it. I let it go. And that's something that I've been practicing is like consciously like telling my brain like, no, like I'm letting it go so I can feel lighter so I can feel better so I can feel more free. And it's just the practice that's really been helping me. I love that. No, that is a really beautiful practice.

So I have one last question for you is what's one piece of advice that you could give somebody that is starting their self-love journey? Great question. I would say that

Most people are looking for huge results way too fast. And they're looking for huge changes and they get down on themselves and upset when it's not happening as fast as they want to. And so if you are just now embarking on this journey, know that it's a journey and know that it'll take time.

And that any progress is good progress. So if you can just be 1% nicer to yourself today, 1% nicer, maybe it's one thing you changed about the thing you tell yourself today. 1%, that will make a huge difference over time. And so really trust the process and know that you are on the right path. Even if you aren't seeing the results you want as quickly, don't give up.

Keep going and just do 1% a little bit better every day.

Wow, I love that. And to be honest, like I've never heard that piece of advice before. It was really beautiful. Thank you. Well, thank you so much for joining the podcast today. I had so much fun talking to you. Oh, man. Thank you so much for having me on. This is so fun. Beautiful souls. Thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. Feel free to leave a review or DM me any topic suggestions. I hope you feel inspired to claim your power today.

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