FORGIVENESS: how to finally let go & move forward
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Hello, my beautiful friends, and welcome back to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things spirituality, self-love, and personal development. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a two-time author, content creator, yoga teacher, and entrepreneur. You are at the right place if you're ready to tap into your gifts, unleash your potential, and become your higher self. It's time to claim your power.

Hello my beautiful friends and welcome back to another episode of Claim Your Power Podcast. If you're new here, I just want to let you know that on June 17th, I'm hosting a new moon circle. It's going to be awesome and super special. We're going to be doing meditations, EFT tapping, manifestation, setting intentions. It's going to be like a little spiritual night for us to really connect to each other and

and create like a global sisterhood. So if that's something that is calling your name that you wanna do, that you wanna take part of, you should definitely sign up. The spots are gonna be really limited because I like to have these types of circles and small groups so that I can really get to know each of you on a deep level.

And so if you feel called to sign up, the sign up link, I'll attach it in the episode notes, but you can also visit my stand store and get your ticket through there. Also, if you guys are liking the show and are liking all the episodes I'm coming out with, I would really love it if you left a review on the podcast. It really helps your girl out and I'm

So so grateful for it. So without further ado, let's dive into today's episode. So little life updates. I was thinking about what I should film this episode about and I was thinking about it for like the last two to three days because I didn't know what I wanted to film this about and a theme in my life recently has been forgiveness. Forgiveness to myself but also forgiveness to others and

And so I feel like because this has been a theme in my life, I noticed that whenever I have different themes in my life, usually you guys have similar themes or similar experiences that you're going through in life too. And so today we're going to talk about forgiveness. And also, by the way, I don't know why my voice has been so raspy the past week. I think I know why. I think it's because I was at my cousin's house and I felt something crawling up my leg.

And I was like, something's up my leg. And my cousin's like, no, no, it's probably the dog. And I was like, no, no, no. Because the dog was like under the table. But I was like, no, no, it's not the dog. Like they don't do this to me.

And then I looked down and there's like a humongous, humongous cockroach crawling up my leg. And I'm just like, it grossed me out. Like, oh my God, I can't, it gave me goosebumps. And I just like jumped out of my chair and we were like screaming, laughing about it. Like not screaming, like, oh my God, ah, like nature, like no, like just screaming, like

from laughter about the whole situation. And so we just like screamed for like 10 minutes. And I think I lost my voice a little from that, but I did Google it later. And I heard that when cockroaches climb on you, it's a sign of good luck and spiritual growth. So I'm going to take it as that.

But yeah, that's my little life update. Without further ado, let's talk about forgiveness. So this episode is for you if you're struggling to forgive somebody in your life. And that also includes yourself too. But I think the main stuff that I'm going to talk about will be focused on like external people in your life, like relationships.

friends, romantic partners, just people from your past that you're still holding on to resentment and anger from, this episode is really going to help you realize just how powerful forgiveness is and how forgiving somebody else actually sets you free.

And so this morning I woke up and I was doing my meditation and it just came to me that I should talk about forgiveness today. And so I wrote a bunch of like little notes in my journal with me. But the first thing that I wanted to mention about forgiveness is just because you decide to finally forgive somebody in your life, you finally decide to forgive them for the hurt or the pain that they caused you, doesn't mean that you're validating what happened.

It doesn't mean that you're saying this was okay the way you treated me and I'm okay with it. It means that your mental health and your emotional health has to come first. So you're forgiving that person so that you can let go of the resentment. When you hold on to a bunch of anger and resentment, it gets stored in the body. There's a book called The Body Keeps the Score. Your emotions are energy in motion. And when we hold on to emotions so tightly like anger and resentment and hatred, it's

that emotion and that energy gets built up in our body and then it affects us. It affects our health, our mental health, and our day-to-day life. And so forgiving somebody else is something that you truly do for yourself and for your own health and happiness. It's choosing to feel good above all else. It's not you saying, okay,

what you did was okay and I make peace with that. It's I'm going to make peace with what you did so that I can be okay, so that I can be happy, so that I can be joyful. It doesn't mean that you're forgetting everything that happened. In fact, when you forgive somebody, you don't forget.

You still honor your boundaries. You still do what's best for you. You still protect your energy and your peace. But when you decide to forgive someone, in that moment, you are claiming back all of your energy and all of your power that you gave away to that person. And that is so, so powerful. Actually, in my life, recently, there was an experience and situation where a friend of mine that is no longer really my close friend did something really hurtful to me.

And I found myself getting really caught up in a lot of resentment and anger because I, something about me that you guys should know is that like I am a Taurus and that means that I'm like a very loyal person. My friends are like my people, my blood. I take care of my friends. So they're so important to me. I would do anything for my friend. Like if my best friend called me, I would pick up at any moment of the day. Like I am always there for my friends.

And in my life, there have been moments where there wasn't an equal exchange of energy with certain friends in my life. There was times where I was giving and giving and giving, but I wasn't receiving much. And so this was kind of like the dynamic of this specific friendship until it kind of got to like the cherry on top point where something happened. And I was like, okay, this is it. This is like my boundaries. I'm not dealing with this friendship anymore. Like I'm removing myself from the equation.

But once I did that, I still found myself being angry and resentful and holding this like tight energy in my body for this specific friend. And...

Over like time as time passed I realized that that was actually sabotaging me Like me holding on to the anger and resentment was actually making me miserable. It wasn't making them miserable It was making me miserable. It was making me feel not good It was making me feel like I just want to explode and just like it overthinking, you know And so I made the decision that I would forgive this person with my entire heart for myself. I

And I'm not validating what happened. I'm not saying that I'm no longer like that I'm letting this person back into my life. It's actually the opposite. Like I'm holding tighter to my boundaries. But I did forgive this friend because I no longer want to feel bad. I want to feel good. And so I'm forgiving this person so that I can free myself and feel good. And the moment that I did that, the moment that I started to feel free,

And I think if you're struggling to forgive somebody, a really, really good mindset that actually my mom taught me when it comes to forgiveness is you have to see people in the way that like source, the universe, God, the divine spirit, whatever you believe in, you have to see that person the way God or the source sees it. And God or source or the universe sees people as pure love.

And you have to realize that when people do hurtful things to you, when people come at you, purposely disrespect you, cross your boundaries, hurt you,

They are so miserable. They are so hurt. There is so much trauma and wounds that they haven't worked from and they're projecting it onto you. And when you realize this and you start having empathy for that person, instead of resentment and anger, you can free yourself and ultimately you can send that person love so that they can heal too.

Because you have to realize people at their core are good people. And they have so much trauma and hurt and things that they haven't worked through. Somebody can only meet you as far as they have met themselves. So somebody who hasn't gotten to know themselves to the core or doesn't know who they are or their traumas and doesn't do the inner work and isn't on like a spiritual growth or path,

isn't going to, you know, align with your energy. Because you're somebody who is aware. You're somebody who's introspective, who's conscious, who gets to know themselves and their behavior and their actions and their emotions. But not everybody does that. And so sometimes people hurt you while they're also hurting themselves. Hurt people hurt people. But also, healed people heal people. And so instead of letting their hurts and their wounds project onto you and ruin you and make you miserable...

You will turn that pain into power. You will forgive them so that you can move on and release that from your experience so you no longer attract those situations and you move up a level in life. Judy was boring. Hello. Then Judy discovered JumbaCasino.com. It's my little escape. Now Judy's the life of the party. Oh, baby. Mama's bringing home the bacon. Whoa. Take it easy, Judy. Jumba.

When you forgive, you also heal and you level up. And that is the best piece of advice I can give you is forgiveness is something that you do for you.

You're not doing it for the other person. You're doing it for yourself so that you can be free and that you can feel good. So something that I learned, like I have a little formula for you guys that will help you with forgiveness. If you are thinking of someone specific in your life that you're ready to forgive, this is like a three-step formula that has helped me forgive certain people in my life that have hurt me and caused me pain.

The first thing is awareness. It's awareness of your emotions. That's the first step. You have to become aware of how you feel, of how you feel around this person, of what this experience or situation has triggered in you. It's bringing that awareness first. Then the second thing is compassion. First, compassion for yourself, compassion for the things you've experienced, compassion for the way maybe you reacted, for the emotions you're feeling, but then compassion for the other person.

When you can form compassion for the people who have hurt you, you will become unbreakable because you will no longer be in a victim mindset where you let people walk all over you and determine how you feel on a deep level. You will be claiming back your power and turning your pain into power.

When you can have compassion for the person who has hurt you and you can see them in that light of, wow, this person is so hurt and they're so deeply wounded and disconnected from themselves that they just didn't know how to deal with their emotions. They didn't know how to deal with what they're going through. They're getting triggered and they're projecting it and releasing it onto me. And instead of being angry at that, you will have compassion and you will say, wow, I'm

This is sad. This is hard. I hope that this person gets the healing that they need. I hope that this person connects back to themselves and understands themselves more deeply and becomes aware of their emotions and their actions and their triggers. And you wish that energy on that person, that energy comes back to you.

Energy cannot be created nor destroyed. So if you put out this angry, resentful, miserable energy out into other people, it's gonna come back to you in the sense that you're gonna keep attracting more situations and more experiences that trigger those types of emotional response in you. But if you choose compassion and love for other people, then that energy is gonna come back to you. Your life is gonna start attracting people that reflect those types of energy, those energies of love and joy and respect.

And again, I really, really wanna emphasize that when I say that you have compassion for somebody else and that you forgive them, you do not let them back into your life unless you want to. You have every right to stand firm in your boundaries to protect your peace and protect your energy. Just because you forgive somebody does not mean that you let them back in and you let them have access to you. Funny thing, forgiveness is something that you do within, something that your heart does. It's not something that necessarily is in the outside world and now you're letting this specific person back into your life to cross your boundaries, to hurt you again.

Like when you, when somebody crosses your boundaries or hurts you and they do it once, that's one thing. That's on them. If they do it twice or three times, you had access to that. You allowed them to do this to you again and again. You allowed the disrespect. That's something that my mom always taught me.

is when I would have situations where I felt like the victim and I would get hurt by certain people in my life and someone was rude to me or someone disrespectful to me and she would ask me how many times has this happened and if I would answer more than once she would say but you stuck around you let them continue to disrespect you and continue to hurt you and so part of that

behavior and part of that experience is on you. You allowed that experience from your own free will by sticking around. And so I really want to emphasize that when you forgive somebody, you do not forget and it does not mean that they have access back to your energy. If anything, you're forgiving them so that you can level up and you can reach a new energy that they are no longer having access to. I also want to give you guys another tip that has really helped me with forgiveness is doing energy cord meditations. So if you don't know what energy cord meditation is,

Basically, everything is energy. We are all energy. Energy cannot be created nor destroyed. It's quantum physics. And so when we form a connection with somebody, whether that's a friend or a romantic partner or just anyone significant in our life, we form an energy cord with them. It's an energy exchange. Like everything is an energy exchange. You going to the grocery store and talking to someone there, you getting in your car and listening to music, you running into a friend. Those are all energy exchanges. We are constantly exchanging energy, which is again...

why it is so important to cleanse your energy and to claim back your power every single night and every single morning. And by the way,

I have an angel energy effect meditation in my stand store that does exactly that. It's an energy cleanse meditation and I do that meditation every single morning and every single night because it's three to four minutes. It's super short, but it really helps you cleanse your energy field and come back into your own power. It's so powerful. So if you guys are interested in that, you can get that meditation in my stand store. But now that I'm thinking about it, I'll also link it in the episode notes.

But, again, what I was saying is energy cord meditations and cutting the cord meditation is so powerful. They have a bunch of those on YouTube, but basically what the essence of those meditations are is you are in meditation and you visualize the person that you're ready to release or you're ready to forgive or let go.

and you're gonna envision that energy cord. It's like a long energy line connecting you and the other person. You're seeing the other person and visualizing them in front of you. And then throughout the meditation, you will be guided to cut the cord between you two. So sometimes you have to do an energy cord cutting meditation a couple of times

specifically like I remember when I was letting go of an ex, like I was doing cord cutting meditations like a couple of times before I actually felt like I was releasing that person and forgiving them and letting them go. So it's totally normal if you have to come back to that meditation a couple of times, but it is so, so powerful because you're cutting the energy between you two. Sometimes you, you know, you're not letting somebody have access to your life anymore. They're not part of your life. You're cutting them out, but there's still that energy exchange happening between you two. And when you are consciously choosing to cut

the energy between you two and cut the cord, you will actually like feel something in your heart freeing yourself. It is very, very powerful. So I definitely recommend that you guys do that, especially if you're trying to let go of somebody who is very close to you, like a best friend or an ex-girlfriend or an ex-boyfriend. Doing the cord cutting meditation will really, really help you out.

But again, I just want to say that forgiveness at the end of the day is something you do for you. Like I cannot emphasize this more than enough because I get a lot of messages telling me like, oh, I don't understand why I should forgive this person after what they did and da da da. Like you're not doing it for that person.

You're doing it for you. You're forgiving that person for you, for your own peace of mind, for your own healing, for your own happiness. When you are holding onto the resentment and anger, you are only making yourself miserable at the end of the day. So when you forgive that person, do it for you. Tell yourself, I'm forgiving this person because I love me.

Because I truly am deeply in love with myself and I care about myself and I want to feel good. So I'm forgiving this person and I'm clearing them from my mind and my overthinking and I'm releasing them so that I can feel good about myself. Also, I really wanted to mention that if you guys...

are struggling to forgive somebody, I think my New Moon Circle will really, really empower you because when we do the New Moon Circles, we're always connecting back to our emotions. We're doing a lot of healing work and setting intentions and meditations.

and cord cutting meditations and energy clearing meditations. And it's super, super powerful. So again, if this sounds like you, I really, really hope that you sign up because it's going to be amazing. It's happening June 17th and it's going to be via Zoom. So you can join from anywhere in the world. It's going to accommodate both like U.S.

North American time and also European time. So I really, really urge you guys to come and join me so we can finally meet and really heal and empower and co-create together. And if you're not able to make it live, you'll be able to have access to the replay so that you can do the journaling and the EFT tapping and the meditations on your own time whenever you want. I want to leave you guys with a little quote.

to end this episode. And this quote is, forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace. Beautiful souls, thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. Feel free to leave a review or DM me any topic suggestions. I hope you feel inspired to claim your power today.