35: Jeff ANGRILY accuses Tana of hooking up with his employee (MAJOR FIGHT) Ep. 35
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Is your vehicle stopping like it should? Does it squeal or grind when you brake? Don't miss out on summer brake deals at O'Reilly Auto Parts. O-O-O-O'Reilly Auto Parts. We can just start rolling. Yo, you want to see this shirt? I was wearing a Ikea yesterday. So badly, God. No, it's actually pretty dope. Look.

Respect my trans homies who I identify as a fucking problem. You like that? Wait, where'd you get that? Amazon. Go like this and then say ally. Ally. What did I just do? What did I just do? What does that mean? I don't know. You're an ally. Jeff, I feel like it's so weird when you're in my house. Yeah, I know. This is new.

It's the same because it's my crew that's shooting it. Can we talk about a little fight that Jeff and I had last week really quick? I want to tell you about this. What's up, Brooke? Hello, how are you? I feel like I'm on Jeff FM. Yeah. With your whole team. How does this feel with us? Let's just get this out of the way first. Oh, no, it's your show. Were you jealous when we started doing our own thing? I was jealous. And I can admit it now. I didn't want to then.

I was jealous. I was really sad. I thought you replaced me. And they like you guys better, I think. There's no replacing you with Jeff or replacing Jeff with you guys. You guys are just such different people that you fill different voids in my life. Yeah. That's true. See, you guys are back and I feel nothing. I don't care. You know? Well, because you still have the podcast. I didn't. I lost something. No, I haven't done it. We don't really shoot that much anymore. Well, because you're going to run out of topics. I used to get mad. All right. You're going to get that fucking vape going over here to your house. Do what you want.

I do it at yours. I guess we're just further from each other. Further away. Yeah, this is close. And we're all on a little couch right here. I guess this was like the idea that we had for us to do a show on a different set, but we just never got around to it. Now you're traveling. You guys went to Arizona. You're doing tours. Yeah. I'm happy you didn't because I saw one episode.

Of you guys together And she covered all The exact same topics Yeah Brooke got so pissed at me She was like You're just recycling it on cancel I felt like I felt like I was the odd one out Like I was the only one Who didn't know She already said All of these things And because their turnaround time Was like five minutes And they didn't say a word Yeah

Yeah. And ours comes out three weeks later. Yeah. That's an issue that you have when you do podcasts every day like Tana and I do. You know, we do a new fucking show every single day and now we're doing more shows. We're committing to more things. We're going to be telling the same stories, but not me. No way. I'm not saying nothing funny on this podcast today. Saving it all for my date after.

Oh, wow. Great segue. That's crazy. I thought you weren't going to bring it up. Yeah, we weren't going to bring it up. Jeff's going on a date after this. Whatever, we can edit it out. But yeah, I'm just saving all my funny stuff for her because I just, I feel like I go on podcasts all the time and I say all the jokes that I'm thinking of that day and then I just waste everything. Well, what if they don't hit? You should test them out here. Yeah, I almost agree with that. No, no, no, no, no.

Today I was thinking you were like I have a date and then I was just like thinking in my head I was like, I wonder what a date with Jeff is like like I feel like you no offense Talk about only yourself the entire time. No, I Actually, I mean a lot of the girls that I date. I don't know how much they know about me You know cuz like I share everything online and I don't get that from them It's not like I could just look them up. So most of the time it's me asking questions about them. Oh

So who's this date with? I'm not fucking telling you. I'm keeping it private. I know what you're trying to do. Sabotage. I'm actually trying. I'm trying to keep, you just said, so Brooke might be joining me on rerunning back 75 hard, but she said she wants to add in not talking shit about people for 75 days. Good luck. I think it's going to be harder than alcohol. Honest to God. I've been really on when I'm not like, I, I like to think I'm not usually like that. Maybe I'm just not like self-aware at all, but I've been like recently I catch myself. I'm like,

Oh my God, I haven't said one nice thing in hours. You just don't notice that about yourself. Oh, you're a cunt. I'm kidding. But I could never stop talking shit about people for sure. That can never happen. But I am going to try to stop talking about my love life.

Like, I'm going to take nothing from you. That's like our whole job. This is terrible for your ratings. All the stuff you guys are saying, this is what your show is. Talking shit on people, talking about who you're fucking. But am I ever going to find love? Am I ever going to get married if everything's just a podcast topic? What do you guys think? Sitting here, now you've filmed how many of these episodes? Four or five? What's the gist of this show? What do they talk about? I think you already hit the average. Who they're fucking. Yeah.

Oh, fuck you. That was one person. They shared, guys? They were sharing? We shared one person. Oh, they were sharing. I was like, Oscar. Oscar, that was just uncalled for. That was a violation. You were ruthless. You know that? I think it's cool because you're like one of my boys, you know, like seeing how you roll. That hurt my feelings. No, no, no. How like you'll like have some like good looking TikToker come over and you like send them home in an Uber and you come out to the living room with us and you're like, yeah, just fuck this fucking idiot. Like I'm...

I would never say that. I ended things with TikTok boy. Did you? Me? I don't want to talk about my love life. Saying TikTok boy when everybody knows who he is. No, no. That's funny. I'd like to break up with you. No. And I decided that after TikTok boy, I just shouldn't do that anymore.

Do what? Just air everything out, you know? And just fuck people just for their looks? I had a fight with TikTok boy where he was like, you literally go on Jeff FM and they're like, like he basically quoted what you just said. He's like, Jeff will be like, you're fucking this fucking guy that you think is so stupid. And then like, I was like, it was a joke. You say that to him. Yeah. But you know, I'm sure he knows your sense of humor. But imagine being with a fully private love life. Like no one knew. Wouldn't that be a fun era for me? Boring. What are we going to talk about?

That's fair. Nothing. Your love life. Nobody wants that at all. I have a question for Jeff. Have you ever seen Tana cry? Yeah, of course. But like, have you seen the tear like physically fall from her eye or does she just make a face? When we got in a fight one time, she called me and she was crying. I don't know if they were real. I don't know if it was real because it was over the phone, but. I was crying. Were you? Yeah. And were you sober then? Yeah. Oh, wow. I think. I don't know actually. Yeah.

Cause then that's real You know Brooke is on this new shtick That she's never seen me cry I haven't Amari It's a real fact I have never seen Tana cry tears And she'll say it Every time She'll go I was sobbing my eyes out Just the other night When she broke up with TikTok boys She's like We were sobbing She doesn't cry I do cry I just don't wanna like I don't wanna like Share it with the class Like

Like you know what I mean I feel like if I get like Choked up There'll be like a tear In my eye But it's like you know But also like Most people in the front group Have seen me cry Whole tears fall I just I guess you You haven't been around Or maybe you were just Too focused on yourself We tried to test her The other day With the saddest video Of all time I don't know if you've seen it The new Jeff would watch it And laugh Music video Yeah let me see it Can I watch it It's like four minutes long Can you put on

Lewis Capaldi's new music video Wish You The Best everybody here has seen me cry several times right and I'm supposed to be the sociopath fucking tough guy I cry all the time I tried to cry today I did this thing I tried I've

- Me relating, you did this Wes? - Yeah, yeah, so I went into this LED bed, which like, I'll go try all this health shit at these places that I go to just 'cause like whatever, you know, makes me feel better mentally and I'm just like probably getting ripped off. But there's this LED bed that you lay in and you've heard of it, right? You know what I'm talking about?

The ultraviolet. Yeah, like the red lights. And some people have like face masks. This is like a full body one. And you pick the different ones that you want to go into, which I don't know how that makes any sense at all. Like one of them is for your joints, one of them for your brain, one of those for your hormones and like emotions. And the woman that was explaining it to me, she's like, yeah, this one makes me cry sometimes. I'll go in there. And I was like, oh, I want that one. I want to try that one. So I get in there and I'm like just trying to cry the whole time.

And I'm just thinking about terrible shit. Like thinking about all, like I was, I mean, I don't want to even bring it up, but you know, I'm probably not seeing a nerf and like all this stuff. And,

And I'm just like, I'm just like tearing up. But I'm like, this is bullshit. This is how they sell you on some scam shit. Now I'm in here trying to think of all these holes. It can't be a try to cry for me. Like if I can't, if I know when I'm like capable, like even that day with the Wish You The Best shit, I was in like such a good mood. I watched this video. It made me tear up. But like I wasn't in like a, it has to be like a certain mood. You look like you're going to cry right now. Do I? Yeah. I start sobbing. Is it because of us here together? Yeah, I'm jealous. I'm jealous.

That's what Reddit says. No, I'm not jealous. You look like you want to cry right now. You can cry sometimes from other emotions, like a happy cry. Like you're just so happy that, you know, you have all of us here together. Yeah, I don't happy cry a lot. I don't think I've been that happy. Cry every day, at least four times. Okay, Jeff, watch this. Tell me if you're going to cry. Can you see it? It's funny. No, like I can barely see it. Actually, it's hard to see. Think about Nerf. Think about Nerf.

This is you and Nerf. Okay, relax over there. It's fine. Are you gonna cry? No. He's gonna cry. Jeff, you're missing an important part. I'm just crying from my brain. I can't even see that. To be honest, that's my bad side. Oh, the dog's old now. And the guy died. The guy died first. Wow. That's what I was hoping for with Nerf. You died first. That I would die first, yeah.

Do we just explain the rest to him? We don't have to watch the whole thing, but basically, then the dog dies. And they put the little collar on him. The dog lives to death whenever. And she was testing me with it the other day. And because I didn't sob, she said I'm a sociopath. No, it's not the fact that you didn't sob. It's the fact that you pretended to sob. No, like I teared up. And I was looking so closely for a tear. Kind of. Do you have like a weird thing you can do with your eye because it's like a little faulty where you can just make it cry? Yes. Yes.

Damn, that's kind of a perk of that. Well, also, it's my fucking acting talents. Oh, acting chops. Huh? You're staring at me. Just not blinking. Like, just not blinking. You know that yawn muscle? Where it's just like...

If you just hit that, the tears just fucking drop. I need that for my life. You know I could do a lot with that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fighting a boyfriend. I'm glad you can't cry. Oh, it's okay. Good for manipulating people. I cried the other day with TikTok boy when we ended things because I was like, this is sad. That is actually sad. It wasn't sad because I don't know how to explain it. It was just like, aw. Sometimes things just can't work with people and don't work and it's sad to see them sad and that type of thing. Aw. Did he cry? Yeah.

Damn. See, this is why like it's. But he's also going through a lot. So I'm not going to like accredit that to me. And I don't want to like air him out.

Like it was like a nice moment. You are. You just did all of it. And then he said, I don't want to. Yeah, he cried. I did it. I cried. No, I cried. I cried. We're on great terms. And that's great. He's fucking fucked up in the head. He's got mental problems. I don't want to air it out, though. I cried at this TikTok the other day where this old man was sitting out on the side of the road and he's like,

You know that guy who does nice shit for people? Like one of those. And he was sitting on this road with...

Like pet treats Like pupperonis And the guy walks up to him And he's like Why do you do this And he's like Oh my dog died So I just sit out here And I wait for the pups to come And I give them treats And then the guy The guy ends up giving him money He's like Here man Like you're such a good guy Here's a thousand dollars And the guy looks in the camera And he starts crying And he's like I had 37 cents in my bank account Like you're spending Your final dollars On puppy treats Just to make you happy Like oh my god See I could talk about that Lila almost killed my cat yesterday How did Lila almost kill your cat She left

bag of open edibles on my kitchen counter when we left and I'm like what if she had eaten them all and died? She's fucking nuts, huh? She's so so nuts, Jeff. She's it's incredible. It really is but can a cat get high or a dog?

Yeah, of course. But it makes them sick. Yeah, and you could fuck them up. No, but they do get high, and they're like all out of it. I remember... Did you get Nerf high? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I would always be in like... You think that's why he died? No, fuck no. That's probably why he lived longer. He lived to 17. He would be... 17 is really old. For a French bulldog. Because we would be packing up, like sealing up pounds, like have an assembly line back in my old trap house. And there would just be so much residue that comes, like falls out, and it's on the floor and stuff. And Nerf would just come over...

And he would just like, kind of like snort up all that fucking extra THC that was on the floor. Like the keef and stuff. All the shake. Yeah.

Yeah, so he would just eat that up and then I think he learned his lesson a couple times but you know, yeah, dogs can get fucked up. Why don't we talk about your trip to Arizona? Was that good? Was that fun? It was good. It was really fun. Yeah, we just talked about it on the last episode of Bunch. It's like the sole reason I went sober though again. Oh yeah? Like touring and getting fucked up. It was one show. And it was enough to know myself. I learned, I learned

I learned enough about myself. Like you did a worldwide tour. I was a 40 minute flight. A global tour. I learned enough about myself. You went to Arizona and back. What the fuck happened? I don't know.

Jeff, I like ate a bottle girl's ass in the middle of the club. What the hell? Like, I'm not even kidding. Like I was, and I, a lot of the things I did, I really can't even say on camera. Like I did a lot and I came home and I just felt terrible. And I was imagining if I had a show when I came home, like, cause when we're on tour, it's like back to back shows. And I was like, I would literally be like,

and crying on the stage. And it just was like enough for me to know I can't party and tour. But that's another good thing about if you do drink, then you could just have another drink and then you're like right back into it. You know, you're feeling good again. That's what I do. Someone crack open a bottle. God damn it.

Yeah. It's insane. So that's how you do it if you're going to live that lifestyle. But if not, just stay on the same level like I do. You did the show. You went up there, just winged it, and it crushed. We had a really insane experience getting there. Like a weird-ass experience in the airport with a fan. And our flight attendant was fucking crazy. We had a crazy night before. So it kind of gave us a lot of material. Yeah. And then I really wanted to test out if crowd work would be fun. So we were asking people their icks. And it's funny because...

we breed this audience of just like women who literally hate men. And it's like, it's just so funny to hear them be like, yeah, my biggest dick is when you just like, one girl literally said like, my biggest dick is when we're having sex and he asked if everything is okay. And Brooke was like, so consent is your biggest dick? Like all at the, it was just funny bouncing off the crowd. Like, you know, and the boyfriends that were like clearly dragged there, like hella funny to watch them just be sitting there pissed as fuck. Cause we're like,

fuck men and they're like you know damn so asking a girl if she's like okay if she's having a good time is an ick that is a real ick like have you ever been with somebody or like even a girl who's like can I kiss you it's like

Why would you say that? Oh, wait, a girl says that to me? Well, like guys do it. I don't know if a girl would ever do it, but like I'm so grossed out by that and like I shouldn't be because that's a respectful thing to do. It so depends on the man because if he's like hot daddy about it, like go off. But if it's like a nerd. There's no hot daddy way to say that, I don't think.

I've had a girl ask me, like, can you kiss me already? Like, what the fuck are you waiting for? Oh, that's bold. I'd be so scared. Well, no, I take forever, you know? Because, like, I'm not drinking. I'm not, like, wild. And also, I'm careful, you know? I don't want to be like, oh, this guy Jeff. The guy from Impulsive. He tried to fucking kiss me. He's a creep. Are you going to kiss your date tonight? Nah, I don't know. We'll see. We'll see how it goes. Honestly...

This girl, I met her in real life like seven years ago before I had any sort of notoriety online. And we just liked each other's Instagram for seven years. And then what changed? Fucking, she fucking DM'd me at the right time. And... Wow. It's beautiful. Yeah, and we finally, well, we'll see tonight, you know? I don't think I've ever, I don't even remember what she sounds like when she talks. What?

I met her out at One Oak. Oh. Oh, wow. Way back. Yeah. I was out partying. At least it was seven years ago. Yeah. Yeah. But like seven, that's like a really beautiful start to a story though. At least it's real life. It's like I'm clinging to the old days before AI took everything over and now our girlfriends are robots that we have sex with, you know? Do you guys think- I'm trying to get a real girl. Britney Spears is AI? I saw that. Uh.

Like it's a conspiracy that like she's like dead and they're like Not even dead but I think that somebody else is like doing the dancing and putting their like her little face on it. Why? Why would they do that? Because she'll go to like drink something and it'll glitch it looks like

Like Lila's Instagram filters. So you think somebody killed her and they did the AI to make up for like, oh, they're going to find out, you know? But even on, oh, I don't know. But even on her wedding day, have you seen all the things that the veil and the face is like glitching under the veil and shit? Like I've seen all the conspiracy theories like that it is like. Yeah. Maybe. There's a bunch more as well. I don't know. Do you know what they're starting now? That I have a meeting about this on Sunday, on Mother's Day. AI OnlyFans.

Like, we're basically like, listen to this, listen to this. Because like, I think I might do it. But it's like, they would take, of course, they would take all of my content. For the audio listeners, I coughed and Jeff scooted away. This is what Jay Alvarez was talking about.

He was saying how OnlyFans is gonna be taken over by AI. - Of course, Jay Alvarez was fucked. Now I-- - Kid's a genius. - Wait, could you make like-- - You know, call it, I swear. - Like AI, like Justin Bieber. - But listen, so they take all of my content and like every video I ever have of me talking, every story I ever have of me talking, I can send them like private videos, phone calls, like anything I fucking want.

And they create a robot version of me that like responds how I would and sounds like me and like whatever. And then people pay to like date that me, like by the minute, by the hour, by the week, by the whatever. And like, you don't need any employees for that because it's AI. That's so cool. So it puts like the so much shit out of like business. It's actually in your words too. Because right now I'm sure like you're getting a bunch of dick pics sent to you and like your friends are helping respond to them or whatever, you know, because there's too many coming in. I respond to every single one.

It's her all day long. So yeah, I guess it would have to really know your personality. You'd have to go into all those messages. You'd have to give up all those messages so it knows how you respond to dick pics, what you usually say. Well, and it's like voice. You know what I mean? So they could like call me. Oh, wow. And talk to me for like a minute. Damn, I could just have you do the podcast or that. Yeah.

I was like damn I can actually replace the shit out of you Wow And that's my dream Never have any more Like AIB can do everything for me Yeah No more cancellations No more late shoots No more fucking Listen I'm on his team I'm gonna be somewhere No more viruses coming Getting transferred in that room You know

Yeah. And I'm going to be somewhere in Nebraska on like heroin on a farm. Yeah, fuck yeah. And no one's ever going to see me again. Me too. I won't even be there. That's where Brittany is. I'll be with you in Nebraska. That's where Brittany is. It's crazy. Tana showed me like the Snapchat AI. Have you tried talking to it? No. Me neither. But she showed me. She's like, it knows everything. Like, watch this. She goes...

Tell me about Brooke Schofield They go Don't know who that is I was asking Why the fuck Would you show me that She goes I thought they would know She goes I know Tana But not Brooke I'm like I thought I would know you I really did It was so hurtful And it's like I didn't ask to see it I was asking it about you And it was saying That you're like Besties with David Dobrik Oh

She's on a delay. I guess it needs an update. I guess it doesn't know everything. Maybe I'll tell it because the more you tell it, the more it like learns too. Yeah. Wait, there was like a, there was a game like that. I feel like when we were young. Tell it right now. Can you fix it? Oh, like 20 questions. Can you tell them that we're not friends? Okay. Yeah. Let's see what, let's see what it says. Ready? Hold on.

For everyone who hasn't tried it, though, it's insane. It's like better than Google almost. So you can just ask it a question and it like immediately answers. It's kind of crazy. Did you ever text that number where you could like ask it anything and it would like respond with an answer? No. Did you guys? Tell her. I said, who is Jeff Wittek? They said Jeff Wittek is a popular YouTuber and hairstylist. Yeah. Yeah. Who are his friends? Fucking...

Do you give blowouts? Jeff Wittek has many friends, including David Dobrik, Jason Nash, and Natalie Maradona. Update that. Tell them why. He is no longer friends with them because they hit him with a crane. Not they. It wasn't all of them. Oh, no.

Whatever. She's going to spread that out. I'm not sure about that, but it's important to surround yourself with people who treat you with respect and kindness. There you go. Nice. He is friends with Logan Paul now. Who needs enemies when you got friends like mine? That's what I say now, you know? I said he's friends with... Because everybody's like, get better friends, get better friends. All your friends suck, you know? And now you move to these new people and they're all still terrible. Honestly, my comments are like that right now. Who needs enemies when you got friends like mine? All my comments are like that now too because whenever I say I'm going sober, people are like, you have to stop surrounding yourself with like...

party people like blah blah blah and it's like this not you really but like the others

Yeah, you do. You should probably. Well, I don't know. I don't feel like anybody encourages you to drink, though. I feel like usually if you want to be sober, all of us are like, oh, good. For the most part, yes. I also think that like, and maybe this will change. But across the last 75 hours, I felt like I could be around everyone partying and convincing me. And it didn't bother me or influence me. Yeah. See, I can't. That's why, I mean, I can't last more than eight hours. Well, you get used to it. Yeah. I'm crying now. About the dog. Yeah.

Wow, you're on a major delay. Have either one of you seen Pete Davidson's new show? I don't want to watch it because I think I'll get jealous of it because he basically has the same life as me. He's from Staten Island. Joe Pesci plays his grandfather. You have so many issues.

I'm just being honest, you know? I come on here, I'm an open book, and you tell me I got issues, I'm fucking, I got, you know? But like, it's so good. It's honestly the best show I've seen. It probably would piss you off, because it like, it's the best show I've ever seen. Simon's his boy in it too. It's based on his life, completely. Like, his whole life from like, childhood to like, now. But obviously it's scripted. Didn't he already do that? He did that in a movie. Yeah.

Yeah, but it's so much more extreme. The reason why it made me think of that is because there's this whole episode about how he's like all fucked up on drugs and has to cut off all of his like drug addict friends because like...

they're influencing him like negatively and shit and it was so fucking good should i watch it you should definitely watch it's like the best it's the funniest show i've seen like on like i feel like not a lot of shows make you like actually laugh out loud like you're like dying i was dying and i like cried i cried she cried but it's on peacock i thought it was gonna be the shit do you think peacock is just an awful streaming service

Say it. The name is Peacock. I don't know. It's just like so many... You think it's because it has cock in it? You're homophobic? No, he's an ally. No, I was...

Just so many streaming services have come up and failed, and I feel like the names have a lot to do with it. I feel like there should be a monopoly. They should all just blend together. What was that one that all the influencers were sponsored by and there were billboards on Hollywood and Vine? Quibi? Quibi, yeah. Yeah, that shit flopped. That shit flopped. Peacock sounds like it's going to be a flop. I don't know. I don't know. They've got Pete Davidson. It's such a rogue, random opinion. They also have a bunch of things. They have a bunch of things on Peacock. They're all my universal favorites.

Okay. Oh, yeah, they're fine. They should have just named it that, Universal. Guess where I got invited? That'd be cool. Space. No. Better. Oh, God.

So I'll just set this up really quickly. We're in Arizona and we were having a day at the pool like beach club, you know? And you know the pool beach clubs are gross. Like it's all frat people. Like they're in the water. They're in the pool. They're nasty as fuck. And that's so, like if I had to rank my type of men and women and like what I'm into, I would put at the very bottom of the totem pole like frat energy. Yeah. Like it just is my biggest ick.

And so you and me were like in the cabana chilling and everyone's like, you have to get in the pool and watch Lila. Like she's literally, she was getting fingered by a guy in the pool in the middle of the pool. I can't even like. She was really working that whole pool. And I was like, for the bit. This pussy cost 30 Gs. She said it at least a dozen times. I love when she says that. And I was like, fine, I'll get into the pool for like.

for the bit for the vlog you know so i like go over to the pool and it's just disgusting i feel like i'm like contracting chlamydia just in this water it's like nasty people everywhere

And I'm just like standing there miserable. And Lila's like, do you like anyone here? Like, is there one guy here who's like so hot? Like, is there like, just find someone you're fucking into, you know? And so we're walking around making a lap around this massive pool and there's people everywhere. And I'm looking at all these frat boys. I'm like, nothing, nothing. And finally, I see these guys come down from the hotel lobby to the front of the pool. And they're all wearing like

button ups and flip flops they are like the nerdiest looking like brown leather flip flops they're all sixes but like nice watches on like all night and i was like that's my type because like they look out of place here you know what i mean yeah and like they look like they're smart they look like they're funny whatever you know so i go over and i start talking to like one of the guys and i'm like hi and we're vibing we're hitting it off we're laughing he's like what do you guys do i'm telling him why we're there and the show and the podcast and whatever and he's like

I'm vibing and his friends come over and he's like, our friend groups should like link up. Right. And I'm like, fuck yeah. Come to our cabana. So I get out of the fucking cesspool pool and they all come over. And then I realized like I actually, I won the lottery. Like they all are rich as shit. Like I'm looking at just like little things, noticing whatever they all live in, like the Hamptons and like fucking all these places and they're, they're on business. And like whole nine, the one guy that I started talking to his family owns part of Chanel and

And then I was like, okay, I lucked out. Like, you're mine. And literally picked him out of a thousand people. Like, picked them literally out of a thousand people. And they all do all this just different, like, rich ass shit. They all have different jobs and they're there. And whatever. And so we spend the rest of the day just, like, getting fucked up with them. I think I'm catching a vibe with this Chanel Hamptons guy. And then by the end of the day, I found out he has a girlfriend. But, hey.

I hate when that happens. It is what it is. But anyways, we're all sitting in their cabana and they're like trying to invite us like on trips. They're like, come to the Hamptons. Come here. Come there. Whatever. I wonder if the girlfriend knows. And one of the guys' dads just bought Epstein Island. No way. And is like revamping it. I don't know what that means. It's my dream. And they invited me to Epstein Island.

And I feel like Well it can't be called that anymore I know there's a new name Yeah what's the rebrand They told me the new name It was like Something cute But it'll never be that in my head Something that's not giving child trafficking You know But um So I texted them to follow up And they're like dead ass serious And I feel like Do you get a plus one Imagine the vlog Come with me to Epstein Island I would Please let me be your plus one I know you want to bring Paige

I feel like we all go. I feel like we all go. I'll bring the massage table. You bring the children. Okay, we're at this one. It's going to get us. I don't even want to go. It's just a joke. You probably feel the fucking evil. But how crazy. The evil energy. Yeah, do you think it's like just heavy there? Do you think like you go there and you can like feel like,

yeah there's definitely places that you feel that like a lot of crazy went down and like i've definitely been to some places where like you just kind of sensed that that energy i always feel that way of versace mansion like super haunted super like yeah yeah died here like you know he got killed right there on the stairs yeah absolutely and like all the other so many people have died in like all the rooms and

It's honestly one of the most haunted places I've ever been. I remember we were like... You probably also shed blood in that place too, right? Well, of course. From what? For like a knee scrape or something? I mean, I always come back from there, like head to toe and bruises. Miami in general, really. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I've just done some...

really unthinkable things at that place. It's probably the darkest place in the U.S. for me. I went to this party. Well, I went to a wedding at Mar-a-Lago. And in that room, it's like where there's pictures of Epstein used to be, like, you know, like all this crazy stuff that was going on in there. And it was nuts. It just felt like, you know, some shit's gone down in this place. Where's Ghislaine now? Is she like in... I think she's in prison, right? Or is she just...

She's got to be, yeah. Like at brunch somewhere? Yeah, she's got to be. At brunch somewhere is crazy. Like our guy, Billy. She was Billy McFarlane. He's out and about. And he's doing another festival, huh? He is doing another festival. You're going to come with us for sure. So you've been sober now for how many days? Who? I've been sober for five days. Five days? Yay! My decision-making skills are actually already improving so much. Smoking weed or no weed? No weed.

Weed. That's sober. Yeah, yeah. That's fine. 100%. It's just no alcohol and no crazy things, you know? What if you had to give up vaping, weed, any sort of meds? Like any sort of dopamine, like anything? Do my prescriptions count? Like all vices. Can my prescriptions count? No, you're stranded on an island. What happens to you? I think I would be fine.

But I would miss it dearly forever until I die. I just got my Adderall prescription back today and I literally feel like a zombie. I'm like... Dude, there's an Adderall shortage right now. And this happens to me like once every three months where I like go to refill my prescription and you can't get it anywhere. And I've just spent a whole day calling pharmacies and finding the ratchet ass ones. Oh, what a nightmare. Like in like K-town out here, like in hoping underground they've got a little left. I tried to get...

Because I don't like how I feel on Adderall. I just don't like it. And so I was like, oh, I'll just do Vyvanse instead. I go to checkout yesterday. It was $890. Did you pay it? No. I had to call the doctor and be like, Adderall it is. Like, I'm not paying every month. That's like another rent. I'm so scared. Oh, because you're insurance and company? I don't have insurance. That's why. But Adderall is like $5. Get GoodRx. No, I did. That was with the GoodRx. Oh, damn. Vyvanse apparently is like...

a really expensive generic shit how do you feel but do you feel like adderall i don't makes me way more of a bitch even the other night when i was like coming down off of it oh it makes me evil like but i'm so productive i know it sucks so badly like i'm literally not a human being without it like i can't focus i can't like i get 30 000 times more done but then i'm just like a lifeless page says i sound like like i'm

talk to texting at all times. Like, I'm like, hello, how are you? That's amazing. That's so funny. Yeah, I used to try to, like, separate, like, social days from Adderall days. Like, if I was gonna be around people, I just wouldn't take it. That's what I do. But I didn't know we were gonna film today. I think I need a shift in my life. Like, I need a serious change. Like...

Maybe I'm going to try ayahuasca or ketamine therapy or something like that. I was an assistant to a girl in college who was brilliant. She was a biochem major. She dated Hunter, actually. That's how I knew Hunter. And I'm not kidding. She was a genius. She was so smart. She was our recruitment chair. Did ayahuasca. And I'm not kidding. Now people find her in alleys waving a flag. Wait, are you talking about... Oh, so she went the opposite way. Bleep it, but are you talking about...

Oh yeah, that bitch went off her rocker from one ayahuasca trip. Off her rocker. Which one is this? The Chinese girl? No. What? She was just this like amazing, like really smart, established girl. But now I'm not kidding. She'll be like raking in alleys. He thinks we're talking about ****. No, but that would be hilarious. Oh.

And she totally would. She seems like she was fucking, she was a genius. Now she's just nuts. I can't. A bunch of money. They say, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything. No, and like a cool way, like a fun party way, you know, like she likes to party, but she's got billions in the bank. I just feel like I've been doing a sober life for a long time and I just miss that, like boost of serotonin in my brain. I just want more happiness going on in my brain. And whether that's got to be,

It's got to be assisted by some drugs or something. Whatever. That's what science is for. What does ketamine therapy make you feel like? Because I fucked my brain up with...

so many things. Like, it's fine now. You know, I'm not a normal, I'm not a regular person. I need help. Like, the other day, I was talking to Mike, my good friend Mike. You know, he's an older guy. I can relate to him. Geometric man. Yeah, yeah. And he's on a private jet going to Miami. And he should be having the time of his life. But he's texting me on the side. Yo, man, like, I don't know what it is. I'm just like, I'm just depressed. Like, I don't know what to do. I'm really going through it. And I was like, well, nothing's ever going to feel as good as heroin. Yeah.

And he was like, that's what you fucking say to me, man. But I meant it like to make him laugh a little, but also like, it's true. You know, you're, you're chasing happiness, but nothing is going to feel like that fucking synthetic happiness that you get from heroin. You know, that feeling that's so good.

You actually did enlighten me On my first 75 hard journey We were like in the car Driving somewhere And I was like Dude I'm just so fucking Bored all the time Like I said that to you? Like well I was I was saying this to you I was like I'm just so bored All the time when I'm sober Cause it's like There's no dopamine Like really Like you know what I mean Other than like Other things I guess But like

I was like, does it ever get better? Like hoping for some motivational ass advice. Like, does it ever like through sobriety? Like, do you ever like, and Jeff was just like, no man, I miss that feeling every day. I feel like the further away from it you get though, maybe you forget kind of. So you could be come addicted to like working and success and making money and shit like that. And that's all good. That's, that's cool. But like, no, cause you get that high in the beginning of the first year, like first three months where you're, that feeling is in the morning. You get it. You know, you're like, wow, I feel like,

sharp and good and happy. And I'm just like, this is the best part of the day is the mornings, which is like our, what our parents and stuff like, you know, like when we were like going to school and shit, like they were like happy in the morning. Makes sense. You know, like that's what a normal person should be. But I don't know. That goes away. That was the most un, I mean, but I appreciate your honesty. I'm not saying you should be giving me like bullshit to motivate me. It's just like trying to figure out how to navigate that. Like,

is so discouraging for me. - Well, it's good to have realistic expectations. - That's real, it's real life though. You have to find joy in, I don't know, having kids, having a family, talking to your family, loving people, loving fucking, I mean, if you could be fucking, you could fuck those fucking TikTokers. That can make you happy. - Yeah, we talked about that last episode. - That can make you feel good. - One vice for another. - I think this was my final TikToker.

I think that, no, sincerely. You did, I think you've aged out of TikTokers. I mean, my final, no, I just mean like my final like fuck boy. Like I think I can't sleep with anyone else that I'm not going to date. And if I can't date, like I'm not going to date them if I can't marry them. That's good. You know what I mean? Like I think I'm finally at that point. That's good. I think I got my last little kick out. Last little hurrah. Yeah, I had sex last night, but. With who? Yeah.

What the fuck? Someone I could maybe marry, so we'll see. Yeah? I mean... Who? I'm not. We're not doing all that. It was just like a fun joke. You're so boring. Why did you bring it up if you didn't want to tell the people? It's a fun joke, but you actually did? Yeah, well, I did, yeah.

Good for you. Hell yeah, bro. Hell yeah, she's one of the guys. Yeah, I fucked this fucking dumbass TikToker last night. No, no TikToker. It's a shame. She said last episode she was going to practice celibacy or she was going to go on 75 hard from men. I lied. I lied so heavily. You? I don't think I could ever. Yeah, I don't think I could ever not. Like 75 days of just like entertaining men.

Is that normal in life to have 75 days of entertaining? Absolutely no one like no flirting no sex. No, no, no make out no dates Like I don't think I ever could I think it's normal, but I don't I wouldn't recommend it to anybody Have you ever had a celibate period of your life? Of course. Yeah, of course. Like if you were like hospitalized or something like just like yeah Well, I had like a year where I was like really going through it, you know, that's probably Yeah, I've had like a good year straight. I probably won't celebrate for a year. No sex for a year. Yeah, I

And you just like jerk off or you didn't... I jerked off, yeah. A couple of times. Not like crazy, you know? Like I'm on 60 Minutes one day. Yeah, I jerked off, yeah. You know, when I had to. But no, I mean, I've also...

done little stints in jail where i've only jerked off like once in like a couple months you know and i i feel like i remember asking you this like person to person but i don't think i've ever asked you like publicly how do you jerk off in jail this is the tiktok clip hey under the sheet under the sheet you put the sheet over you and like you just need to like kind of like lay with the sheet over you and like hopefully you're like your neighbor if you're in a dorm or if you're in like a

then, you know, there's only a guy underneath you, which... And then you feel the bunk bed shaking a little. Yeah, and there's no, like, white noise you could turn on or something, you know? Like, it's dead fucking quiet, you know? You hear everything, so you gotta be real careful, and you don't wanna, like...

get caught doing some shit like that. What if you sync up? Like, make sure you do it at the same time so he's focused on him, you're focused on you. And that's awkward the rest of the time. It's just you two in the cell forever, you know, for life. But like, I feel like that'll make you close to somebody. I feel like that's why everyone ends up gay in jail. Or like, we're just the new black men scissoring each other. Everybody don't end up gay in jail. That's like, that's blown out of proportion. My mom came out gay. Your mom did? Yeah. I feel like it's... I think she was gay going in, honestly.

I feel like I would come out of jail gay as fuck. I feel like she was gay going in and then that probably just made her realize it or, you know, jail will make you realize a lot of things because when they take everything out of it, they take your vape away. They take your fucking, your freedom to eat, just your freedom to do anything at any time. You know, it really changes the way you think. It turned Cody super religious, you know? Yeah. Look at that. That's insane to see Cody come out and be like the way he was, you know?

It will really, really change you. But I don't think it'll turn you gay. I think if you come out gay, then you were gay already. Well, I think if I ever go to jail, I think I've said this on Cancel, but my entire game plan for jail is if I ever went, because I have to think about that sometimes. I could see it. I would go in and I would find the biggest fucking thing

scary woman and I would just be like, can I eat your pussy? And then I would just like be her. And then she'd be your bitch the whole time? Yeah, and then I would just be her like little slut so that she would like protect me. That'll work for, that would work for the women's side, I think for sure. But I don't know. I've never been over there. So I don't know. I've only seen shows about it. Did you have any friends in jail that went in straight and left gay? No. Really? No. No, it doesn't turn people gay, he said.

I follow this guy on TikTok and I want to have him on canceled. He was in like dark ass prisons for like fucking like 30 years. And he just like tells all of his stories about like what he saw and like child molesters being killed and like fucking school shooters being killed and like all the like people being like, what's it called when they turned out when like someone is straight, but like they get assaulted by like someone else, like sexually assaulted by someone else, like a man.

I think I know the word. Me too, but turned out. No, I'm not going to. No, no, no, no. I'm just trying to avoid that word, but there's a term in jail for that. I think it's called being turned out. I don't know. I haven't heard that one. I don't know. I just watched this guy teach us. You're teaching me. And I kind of want to fuck him. I need to find him. Somebody leave it down in the comments what you're talking about. What's the word we're looking for? We just can't.

Oh, man. Fully ruined. Sorry if I'm low energy today. This is going to fucking roll over into this date. And, you know, after seven years, I should not be coming in like this. What's going to be your energy? Like after seven years? Just like this. I'm going to be fucking pick her up in the car, driving like this all the way, lean back. Well, it took you long enough. Seven years.

That is a really long time to think. Do you think that she was thinking about it the whole time? Or do you think she just now was like, you know, he's kind of good looking? We would DM, but it never went anywhere. It just never followed up. I don't know. That's persistence though. Because I could never... If somebody was still DMing me seven years later... Look, I'm really just trying now at this point in my life. I need to settle down. I need to get a girlfriend. How old are you? Yes. I know. I was probably going to say...

Early 20s, but I'm actually 33. Oh, that's okay. I thought you were going to be older than that. I didn't think you were going to be, but you made it sound like you were going to be older than that. What the fuck? 33 is not old. I just recently made a really grave mistake. Let's get down to business right now. I know what you did. I know what you did. Look at her face. She's scared. What did she do? I know what you did with the weatherman.

You fucked the weatherman? You made out with the weatherman. No, I didn't. She hooked up with the weatherman. Did you? I did not hook up with the weatherman. Which one's the weatherman? Weatherboy. I did not make out with the weatherman. Why do you think that? Because I know. I didn't make out with the weatherman. Does everyone think that? That you know of? What's the weather like? I did not hook up with the weatherman. Wait, look. I did not hook up with Ryan. Say Scott's honor. Scott's honor. But were you there? Were you like, did you miss it? We've hung out twice. You cuddled.

You cuddle naked. No. Naked? What do you think I am? In underwear or something? Naked cuddling? Naked cuddling. No. That's a new shit that everybody's talking about. Bible. I did not do that. Everybody's naked cuddling. I've hung out with Ryan twice, but is that what earlier? One of you. No.

Oh, go fuck yourself. You've seen it? Earlier they were talking and having a conversation off camera and they said, you have to keep friendship out of business. Like, like Tana always says that. You were making a fucking joke because I said that to Ryan because I was like, I'm not going to hook up with you. Too late. Too late. You already did. This game is so full circle. So what is a hookup?

You made out tongue kissed. I don't think I've ever made out with Ryan. In underwear cuddles. No. Second ago she didn't and now she says I don't think I've ever made out with him. I've never hooked up with, like maybe like at a party, like as a joke, like mwah. But like, I've never hooked up with Ryan. Okay. To be fair, you did say that on the episode. What? You said, I'm not mixing business with like relationships anymore.

I'm not. Well, I mean, probably in life I am. I love that for you guys. If you two become a thing, that would make me so happy. Yeah, because you would have so much fucking fun with that. I love Ryan so much. I know you do. We all know you do now. No, I didn't hook up with Ryan. This is so unfair. This is insane. I love Ryan so much, but like that's not our journey. Whatever. Who cares? It's fine. He's dope. Ryan's dope. No one's judging you about it.

No, he's a great guy, but that's not my journey. He came over the other day. We watched a movie, laughed, hung out on this couch. On this couch. Is he the guy from last night? Is he here in town? No.

No. Is he the guy you expect us to believe? I love Ryan. He's like a great friend. He's amazing. So Ryan just came here to watch a movie with you on the couch? We literally watched a movie and just like sat here, talked. What movie? The Impossible Room, the perfection room. Some movie about these people in a room. Did he suggest it? What's it about? Give us the plot. No, he like picked it. These two people are in this white room for 50 days and they make a million dollars if they make it out. One, people die. It was awful. She read the description. And there was no fooling around. You think I fucked the weatherman. No finger in nothing. No. No.

Awfully defensive I don't know This is insane It's fine I knew A man with a job at least That's a step In the right direction He's a weatherman Yeah he's got a job I'm not doing that I can't believe This is a real Collective thing Like fuck Literally fuck All of you Like all of you Can suck a dick And die one

I didn't. Hey, 75 hard. It's a new town. I think you drinking, you just get so friendly and like...

You're just so fun. I love friendly. You know? Yeah, friendly. Yeah, it's cool. I haven't hooked up with Ryan. I guess we could say yet. We don't know what the future holds. I believe you, but it's like, why would you have him over here to watch a movie if you didn't want to hook up with him? To hang out? Like, Amari was here. We all hung out. Go ask Amari. He lies for you. We all do. I don't like you guys as much as Ryan. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. I swear.

I think Ryan is my favorite. Maybe you can over you. Well, you're not making a good case for yourself. You need to get sober again if that's what you think. No, I'm just kidding. I love Ryan. I love that. But wait, did he say we hooked up?

No, not necessarily. I just kind of pried it out of him, you know? Pried what out of him? Like what was said? I think it came out of one of the other boys when they were all here and there was like fights happening. Everybody was drunk and like stupid shit was happening and they were calling me and I was, I think I was in a different time zone. So when they called me, I was like, what the fuck are you calling me? I hooked up with my ex that night. Did you? He was here. Ring camera footage and all.

This is your show. You could edit it out if you want. Like, I don't know. You could censor it. No, but I'm going to have beef if Ryan's out here saying that we hooked up and we didn't. I didn't even hear it from him. And then I kind of pressed him on it. And I don't know. Look, I don't know. I don't know. I...

He said that you sent him home on an Uber or something. Yeah, I was like, oh, that's where you got that. I was like, sleepover. You are a guy. You are one of the fucking sleepover. And it's not like he hit. And then I was like, leave. I was like, leave. He was just like, and I was like, no, Ryan, we have to be friends. Tana will go to great lengths to get a man out of here. One time she packed an entire suitcase and got in an Uber to the airport to convince somebody she had a flight. And she did just to get them out of here. Pack the suitcase.

My friend did that one time. He put on a full suit. He got like dressed up like saying it was Sunday morning. He said, I got to get to a meeting. He put on a suit.

Did his hair and everything, shaved, went out of the house, left, and then came right back home, took the suit off, went back to sleep. This was with a guy that I did hook up with. And then afterwards, it was just weird. And he was super weird. And it was a bad hookup. And I told him that I was going to Aspen, Colorado. I packed a suitcase with parkas in it, zipped up my suitcase, fully got in an Uber to just like spin the block and then came back and unpacked the suitcase because I just couldn't do it. God, I would die if somebody couldn't just tell me like, please leave.

But please leave is so mean when someone wants to be there. It's really like not even who the person is. It's just sometimes, you know, you need to sleep and you can't do that with another stranger next to you. It's a, like, think about it. It's a person, you know, for what, like with you, like a few hours. And then you got to sleep next to this person. I've never hooked up with someone that I've known for a few hours. I'm just kidding. I'm just fucking, I'm joking. I'm joking. I was just seeing it. Ever in my entire life. That's not shameful. Actually, one time in Las Vegas. Okay. This guy taught me how to play roulette and I won a bunch of money in it.

And now you teach everybody else. That was a really valuable lesson. The only time. His name was Steen. What kind of name is Steen? I don't know where he is now. He's a painter. Oof. I remember it because it's the only time I've ever done that. Oh, man. Steen. I can't believe you all just think I hook up with the weatherman now. Like, I feel uncomfortable. Let's move on from it. Oh, is that the Borat guy? The guy who looks like Borat? Wait. Like, I ship him and Paige. I think that could be a fun journey. Is it?

If he said that we hooked up, he's going to die. You should hook up. He's hot. He's hot. Yeah. He's a cutie sweetie, but I just couldn't do that. He could do our weather. Could we get a weather segment? No, fuck no. Don't fucking start coming after my bits. I'm going to start giving people a fade. You're going to get a cold text. He said he would do...

What would I text you if you ran a weather segment here? He said he'd do a sports segment, but that's probably because he wants this pussy, apparently. That's why. Yeah, and he's offering segments on other shows. He's done. He's done. He's fooling around with my talent. You're so stupid. He called you talent. That's good. Talent, yeah. I guess that's good, but I just can't believe everyone thinks I'm fucking the weatherman. I would tell you guys. And he's watering down our weather segment for pussy? Yeah.

For pussy he's not gonna get. For not even for pussy, for naked cuddling. We didn't cuddle naked. You don't even get no props for that. Naked cuddling is crazy. Do you think I cuddled this man naked? Do you actually think that? Say bye. Him and Steven talk about naked cuddling all the time. They're like, yeah, we just cuddled. We just cuddled. Like, no, what happened, bro? They're like, no, we just cuddled. And I'm like, you can't. I was fully clothed. That's nothing. He left here. So there was cuddling. No. Clothes. No. Oh, sorry. No, I'm just getting my facts straight. I'm pissed.

Whatever. I'm sorry. I brought it up. No, but if someone... That's like... Especially me because it's like, here's the thing. I'm a slut. I should have saved this. I should have saved... I want to eat people and I'm a slut. Sound like that. Sound like that. I need... I should have saved this for our fucking show. Well, we can run it back. No, we needed some juice on this one. Damn. We can run it back, but I just...

If someone says that like I did something I didn't do sexually It's one of my I guess it's like the movie Easy A Like when she starts going around Oh yeah Like saying that she fucked a guy Just to like get attention And then all the guys start saying it And no one believes her But like wow God I'm such a victim But um Sincerely like It bothers me Cause it's like yo I probably did have sex with someone that night Just not you

Like don't say, you know what I mean? Don't say. I do believe you would probably just admit to it. It's so funny. Ryan's roped into this drama now. Like he never wanted to be in any of this real shit. Everything. I'm calling him after this too. He just wants everything to be a skit, scripted. I'm not going to call him on the show. He's so sweet. Like that's mean. Hey, you know, but I. Yeah. Why the fuck do you say you naked cuddled me? I am saying that on a call after this. You can sit here for it too. It's kind of nice. I would like for someone to make up like rumors about me.

You have such a wholesome vibe. It's so sweet. It really is cool. I really get why this show fucking crushes it. I'm so happy that it's back up and running and I was able to...

do that for you, you know? Honestly, so true. I'm just like... Jeff, thank you so much. I really do think you did this. Honest to God. I don't think we would have gotten it rolling again if it weren't for him. If it wasn't for your amazing team of people who also are awful humans. Why? What did you do? Did you do some pervert shit over here? They're just in on this bit. What...

Fuck y'all! Dead ass! No, this is my first time. And you two are just like laughing. Oh my God. I'm so fucking pissed. Because you guys know. You know. You know, right? You know? Well, I didn't know the tea yet. So you're like. Wait, nobody else said anything? No, because he told me earlier Amish Aaron was single. Huh? Oh, you're. And now you're the problem. Hold on. You're a piece of fucking shit. Let me call Steven. Because that's my boy that will fucking tell me the truth right there. Is that the mouth here?

He'll give me the inside scoop. I wanna talk to Steven. I'm learning all about this little crew. Nah, let me just call him real quick. Steven's thing, you know? Johnny Depp. No, you're not here. Nobody's here. Nobody else is talking to this. You want me to get some intel? Nobody can talk. Yo, what's going on? What are you doing? I'm just gonna cheat. I'm just gonna do my eyes.

Shit's getting weird, bro. I just did Tana's podcast and she's like fucking just talking about Ryan and all this shit. I wish they never did that fucking stuff that night, you know? Oh, God. Wait, she brought it up? She brought it up. Yeah, she told me everything that happened. What are you going to do about it? Nothing. I think we just can't do business together anymore. We just need to fucking find a new girl to do podcasts with.

Really? Yeah, whatever. We'll find any fucking girl. Who cares? We'll just get any girl to fill her shoes. We'll get an AI version of her. That's somebody that won't fuck the fucking weatherman. Or they didn't even fuck, right? They just cuddled naked or some shit. I don't know. That's what Ryan said. They just cuddled and made out. Damn. What are you doing tomorrow? You want to link up? Shoot some TikToks? YouTube videos, bro. Come on. YouTube vids. Yeah, my bad. My bad. All right. All right. Hell yeah. I'll hit you up in the morning. Yeah. All right. Later. Ryan? Ryan?

Amari's like which time damn I'm stirring the pot over here. I don't like this shit. That was really I think

We did it. We fucking did it. First time ever on Canceled.

Wait, we just said that. Wait, someone in high school told everybody that I shaved his balls in the shower. I'm not kidding. And how the fuck do I say, like, why would anyone make that up? You know what I mean? So everyone was like, obviously you did it. Like, I'm like, why the fuck would I shave somebody's balls in the shower? But then I was the ball shaver, ball shaver Schofield. No. For a while. And that was... No, I think it was like... I'm so fucking sorry.

I love Ryan too, like, and I ride for him, but it's like, bro, like. All right, move on. Let's move on. Next topic. It was real to him. Let's get. It was, what did you say? What's going on on TikTok news? You're going to get TikTok? Get out. Oh, it's drama. All right, I'm out. Fuck him. Good. Oh my God. I'm so fucking pissed. That is so hilarious. No, hold on, hold on. Don't walk. Don't walk. Yeah, wait. I'm out. Do you wait when Andre's about to?

No. No, you... You're getting just the fuck out after this episode. I'm so sorry. No, you have to. No. Because that's the fucking... That's the... We need this. We need the rest of the story. Literally, fuck all of you and you're like living for content life. Like, Ryan and I are actually good friends. Like, I'm so nice to him. We have so much fun. That's wild. What the fuck, Olivia?

You know why? You know why? Look, you know why she doesn't want to call him out publicly on the show? Because the truth's going to come out. She's going to say, why did you tell them that we naked combed? She's not going to...

Yeah, that's what's going to happen. That's what's going to happen. That's why she doesn't want to do it live on Jeff FM. That's why. And you know what? If she doesn't do it live on Jeff FM, that means she called him and she said, hey, I'm going to pay you money to shush money. She's got like, stop saying this. I know we did it, but you need to stop saying this.

You're a psycho gaslighter manipulator. I really just, I'm pissed. Honestly, my feelings are kind of hurt. Like that's a crazy thing to say. I don't know, to lie on me. There's people that don't have water in the world. There's people that don't have clean water or electricity. So you want to be mad about this? You want to be hurt about this? Go with no water for the next 48 hours. Don't text him. Don't text him. Don't text him.

Because I know what you're going to do. Listen, we got Tiger King coming on the podcast on Monday. Do you really? Yes, we do. We have him calling in. We should get Carol. No, no, no. We got to pick a side here. We can't be. They found her husband. Yeah. They did. He's alive. This is prerecorded. You know, we have Tiger King coming on. So you guys probably already saw that episode yet. But right now I'm kind of at the point. Look, those fucking nails tapping away. He's just like me. She just sent paragraphs, man.

i said oh i hate you call me in 30 we're fighting no hey why'd you do that you ruined it because i'm a real person too jeff you're like no you're not no you make money appear on the internet it's magical your life is not real you get paid in snapchat crystals that become rent and food

That is really amazing if you think about it. It's a fake life, so you have to sell your naked cuddling stories. Whatever. Sorry for you. A story it is. Whatever happened that night happened already. It's in the past. It didn't affect any of our work relationship. I was just joking. Cuddle naked is crazy. It's so funny. I'm not talking about the past.

It's so funny. It's so good. You know? It's so specific, though. It's one of those things that's like, who would make that up? I'm so fucking pissed right now. Fire. She's plotting his death. Fire. Kill yourself. I didn't know that. He didn't say anything. No. Amari, do you know? I'm sitting on the couch. Amari. Thank you. Horizontal? Fuck. I'm literally so pissed. I was here, too. Like, I was sitting. Oh. Like, what's happening? That's so funny.

Maybe, you know, I guess it could be worse. I'm more so my feelings are just hurt that he like lied on my name. Well, I think it's nice that he made up a wholesome lie about you. Like he could have said you got that you like did it. Maybe he said you guys just like fooled around. And I maybe I took that as maybe. What the fuck? Maybe he said you guys just like kissed and were like, I don't know. We got to respect Ryan's privacy, too, you know, because. Yeah, this is his truth also.

I'm not a C-drama. No, listen, let's respect Ryan's privacy. I think we should cut this whole bit. Why? No, we're not. We can't cut that. That was funny. I think I'll, well, I guess cut anything too. I don't want him to like kill himself, but I am going to cuss him out after this and we'll, you know, leave some of it. Yeah, we can't have him kill himself. I know, we talk. Fucking asshole. Oh my God, I'm sorry.

Yeah, you know what? Fuck him. Put it in. Put it in. Hopefully his ex-girlfriend fucking gets mad at him. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm putting your dick in me. We're cuddling naked butt to nut. That actually is a hole in the story for sure. It can't stop there. If we're cuddling naked butt to nut, like butt to nut.

Like at least a tummy. Oh God. Yeah. Cause no, no, that can't. No one cuddles naked. Yeah. I don't believe that. Cause you would, you would be like, just put it in. If I'm getting butt ass naked, like we're having sex. Like, you know what I mean? That makes no sense. I don't think I've never cuddled naked. Like one night. Yeah. You're not the one to be like, no, not tonight. I mean like you could cuddle and say not tonight, but then you're clothed or, you know, like, I don't know, whatever. You're right. Yeah. If you get to that point. Yeah.

One of the holes. Somebody's story's not adding up. I'm so pissed. Okay. Well, Jeff, thank you so much for coming on. I'm glad I could help. We covered so much. After sort of canceled. It's not how I thought it was going to go, but I'm sure we'll do more. You know, you've had a long day. We've all had a long day. We're on Adderall. I seem tired. Oh, Ryan's calling me. We're both in our Adderall crash. See, this is Jeff. Answer it now.

Come on. Unless you have something to hide. She does have something to hide. I don't have something to hide, but like... That's like mean, right? No, because you get to cut it. Oh, now you're opposed to being mean? Yeah. Sorry. I don't even know. It's the Adderall. He stopped calling. Yeah, yeah. You can call him back. She's fucking lying. He said I'm at a concert. He's at a concert. This is insane. The life this kid lives, man. He's at a fucking concert. What concert is he at? I'm just going to send a photo of you.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Stop that. No. You're on the podcast. The episode's going to come out. I don't care about that, but don't make it like I'm over here talking shit because I'm just doing your fucking show. Yeah, no, she's scared. At this point, y'all think I fucked him and sucked him for all I fucking care. This is a beef now between me and Ryan. You won't answer his call in front of us. You got shit to hide.

This part, I guarantee this shit doesn't see the light of day. Yeah, this is just awful. Who wants to tune in? I'm making a fucking side episode right here. The truth. This is the truth about what really happened. She's scared. She's scared to call Ryan because she naked cuddled him. That's it. I got what I needed. Brooke's here. She saw it. Confirmed. So confirmed. I ate his ass too. Shit. At this point. Don't be sarcastic about it. It's the truth.

Don't do sarcasm right now. This is the worst moment of my life. No, it's not. Honestly, I fucked some fucking lizards. I should have just fucked him, honestly. But, you know, whatever. He's hot.

Yeah you guys are gonna build up so much tension that you have to fucking No I'm kidding Jeff thank you so much for coming on We loved having you I'll be on Jeff FM this week Tiger King episode Tiger King Probably Little Ryan Weather segment's gonna be wild Probably a Little Ryan confrontation in there I'm sure Oh yeah If you don't Fuck him first Good luck on your date We hope you find love after seven years Jeffrey Dahmer Thank you Yeah keep us posted

Do not do whatever you were planning on doing. Naked cuddle? Yeah. I'm going to naked cuddle this girl. Yeah, you better naked cuddle the fuck out of her. See, this is why I drink, because now I'm pissed. And I want to drink. I got my sober, I am sober daily review. Now that Jeff is gone, I have a bunch of topics for us to talk about. I'm trying to like... Calm, cool, and collected. Yeah, exactly. Decompress, that was like an emotional high. And now I'm just back podcasting with the girls.

And Oscar and Darren, who I love so much. I'm just kidding. It's funny because Jeff is such a good conversationalist, but you can never talk to him about TikTok shit because you have to educate him. You know what I mean? Yeah, I get scared with Jeff. Jeff, to me, feels like if you were to do a stand-up set and no one laughed because he's so dry that I feel like every time I do make a joke, he's just like... And it makes me so insecure, so then I just get really scared to talk to him. So now you're going to do it too? No.

I was just Sorry I'm like No I just I hate him I'm kidding I want to talk about The Mikaela shit On TikTok Kim Kardashian I have spent the entire week This week Plagued Apparently this is like a thing Like an audio fixation

Like, and I've never known a word for this. People were commenting this on my TikTok. Like when you get fixated, it's like a thing with ADHD and like other things too, where you like get fixated on just saying the same thing. And I've always done that. Like had one word or one phrase. Like, it'll be like, I've always said that or slay or like whatever it is. Yeah. But all week it's been Kim Kardashian and I can't stop doing it for the life of me. And now have you seen how that trend has like,

into like people scaring their pets with it. Yeah, I love that. I love a good cat scare. I was in tears last night like at people scaring their pets with the sound and shit. But then it's kind of now just snowballed into people making fun of like everything she does. And I just guess I want your take on like, is this bullying?

Yes. If it's that funny. Yes, but I don't think we should stop is the thing. I think it is bullying and it's wrong, but how fun, right? I'm just kidding.

No, I'm totally kidding. But I think like sometimes bullying, like that's harmless bullying. Like I don't think that she's like really going to get hurt over that. I think she's probably laughing at it. It's like Team Bryce on God. That's what I was just going to say. I literally wrote this in my notes. Like when Team Bryce on God happened, like I was well aware that the entire world was making fun of me. But it was fun to be in on the joke and like duet shit and like laugh at it and say it more and whatever. Even with her original scandal, the like mascara gate scandal.

If she could just like Play into it Yeah but I think That was probably Like against her contract Like she probably Actually couldn't But like later down the line She could have been like And y'all know I love mascara You know Or like if she just came on And just faked A completely American accent And was like What's up guys Kim Kardashian Like just like did something Cause I feel like Now it's snowballing Into people just hating The shit out of her For everything she does

Yeah but I feel like Everyone just has to Hate somebody sometimes And just today it's her Give her like a week And it's gonna be somebody else Yeah but I just wish I feel like I wish I could see from her Her like just being In on the joke one time And I think people would Like kind of step back from it I think so too But then sometimes As soon as someone Is to do that Everyone's like Ugh it's not funny anymore

But that's kind of like Then it dies But then it's like Okay get off my back Yeah exactly Like I'm Yeah if she did it In a corny way I guess I like her a lot I think it's funny Honestly if she is Faking an accent Hilarious And we all know You love an accent faker What's with those shoes Wait You hate these shoes I know Maybe there's a tag Still on them And I've seen you wear that At least a thousand times Oh my god There's a literal $500 tag on my shoes At least it's a flex Yeah keep that on there Honestly put them on my boots

That's crazy I've worn these like a hundred times Unfortunately Oh my god Don't they look like she's wearing like Etnies I love the vibe I love Lonvin Did you ever wear like fat farms? I did I wore like DCs and Etnies for a second I was in my like little emo girl Warped tour era So was I You know what? It's funny I used to like love When Jeffree Star was like doing music Back in the day on like MySpace That was my shit

Someone commented on the last episode of canceled and they were like, I think you guys should make it a regular segment where you address when influencers talk about you. You know what I mean? Yeah. It was a top comment. I don't know. Little did they know in the last episode, I, we cut a pretty big conversation that we had about Mads Lewis. Yes. I mean,

Me checking how I look because I know it's going to be all over BFFs. Just because I didn't want to necessarily give it the light of day, but then BFFs found something that I said on our episode with Hannah Burner about how Mad said my Coachella looks were boring or whatever. And first of all, I just want to say, should we pull up the clip actually? Yeah. Fans believe Tana was indirectly responding to Mad's comment about Tana on BFFs. When Mads came on, she said that Tana's Coachella outfits were boring and that she doesn't have beef with her, but Tana switches up on people. Boring.

We know Mads hates everything right now. I don't hate everything, and I don't have beef with Tana.

She just switches up on people. Okay, let's see the clip. Like when I look back on my old anything, like interviews, podcasts, TikToks, everything, like even just this week, this girl was like kind of coming at me on like a podcast. And I was like, me, two years ago, would have a seven-part series, disorientating, why I hate her, her life, her existence, and every bad thing she's ever done, as if I've done nothing bad ever. You know what I mean? Like just like rose-colored glasses on completely. That's right.

That's growth. A mature Tana Mongeau. Good for her. I think that's really, wow, like that should make you feel so good. I'm not going to lie. A, Dave Fortnoy pronouncing my name right had me like rolling on Molly. He can't say John Adams. That's what I'm saying. Like how are you getting Mongeau right? It looks like someone smashed their face on a keyboard. Like thank you so much, Dave. And I do think that's the only nice thing he's ever said about me in history and I'll take it and I love you. I want to go on BFF soon and like

you know talk about all this and or anything really but i am going to respond to this once and for all and i have bullet points we just they they just praised you for not responding to it and what you're going to respond to it now instead because it's just all over my for you page and it's starting to pit it like because even the comments on that like someone commented like love tana but she does switch up like she switches up blah blah blah yeah i have had the same group of friends

For the last eight to ten years. For the most part. That's true. Like, I mean, you joined maybe a little later. Lila joined maybe a little later. But since I have set foot in L.A., I've been best friends with, like, Ashley, Amari, and Hunter. And, like...

Like everyone else surrounding that. I hang out with those people every day. I've never once switched up with my friends. I ride for my friends. Like if you fucking hate someone, I fucking hate them. If you need me to have your back, why not even Jeff? It's like cut these people out. Duh. Like I ride for the people I'm genuinely close with. And it's like,

What I said on the last episode is it's like Mads and I met via social media. We probably exchanged 25 story replies or DMs, which you know how little those mean to me per the last episode. Yeah, 225 with Olivia O'Brien. Yeah. I think I tried to clout farm with her and do a paparazzi setup because that was my TikTok era and I was like, this would be funny. We had one phone call one time when I was drunk as fuck on a boat in Mexico where she explained the...

whole Nessa Jaden situation this was before I knew Nessa and Jaden far better than I know her and I was just like yeah girl like you deserve the world like I don't even know what I fucking said to be honest I was just like drunk and listening and probably wanted the gossip and whatever we've never hung out when the sun is out we've never hung out alone we've never done anything together at all I've like a friend would do at all we've never like

Had a phone call like just a normal one, like ever again. Like, I couldn't tell you anything about her. And how can you say someone... Like, respectfully, Mads, you don't know me well enough to know what me switching up would look like. You were never in...

Point A for me to switch up to point B. You know, I decided that I felt like we wouldn't be compatible as friends. So I... And yes, I might have said things on the internet or unfollowed her or whatever. And like now maybe I'm different and wouldn't act like that. But at the end of the day, that was me deciding. And sometimes you maybe hear stories about people...

That make you realize maybe we're really different. Or like more information and you just decide maybe... And I'm sure she could say the same about me. But it's like I just decided to cease all... I'm not going to reply to your stories anymore. I'm not going to talk on the phone with you. I just think, you know what I mean? Yeah. I don't understand how that is switching up. So we...

I'm confused because when I saw it I was assuming that it was about you and posting like her ex-boyfriend No like You don't think that has anything to do with it at all? Well she hasn't liked me for a while I think I don't I mean she says we have no beef It's not that she hates me but I mean like the unfollows happened and like I think she's talked about it on a podcast I don't I've also just heard through the grapevine like you know what I mean She'd be talking on the podcast I love that about her She's just like She talks her shit This person

Like I love it And now Who she is like now On social media I see things And I'm like damn Like she's just like me for real She's airing people out And like good for her And she says her opinion And whatever Yeah but it's important Like it does kind of Make you look shitty If it like looks like You guys were really close friends And you just all of a sudden Popped out and like I also just think Switched up It just like Like

I wish people could see how much like LA influencer acquaintance world is. Like there are people who are my acquaintances or friends as influencers and we weren't friends and now we're cool and like whatever. And like the way this whole world works is people are just like fake and weird. And that's why I've kept the same 10 hometown or jump from LA friends from the jump because it's like,

All of this shit is so like fleeting and weird to me anyways. So it's just like... To me, switched up would be like if you tomorrow like went and did some fake ass shit to me because we are genuinely friends and we hang out all the time. Like... Yeah. To say that like just now like we don't follow each other so I switched up is so like LA influencer world. And yes, I agree. Like maybe she could say like at one point I was being way nicer to her and then like I decided to...

cease that and if that's switching up to her then that's switching up to her I guess but it's not to me but there's the difference between like switching up on somebody and just like changing your mind or like getting more information or like deciding yeah I don't know and I guess now it's like anytime someone sees me interact with someone that I wasn't friends with and now we're cool or anything like that it's like oh Tana does like it just is fueling this whole narrative and it's like

I don't know like a lot of things don't bother me but like how can you be someone who switches up if you've had the same 10 friends for the nine years you've been in the city. I feel like the people who really follow you and know you know that it's the only people who are saying that kind of stuff about you are people who don't really know you that well and it is frustrating you know I hate that like seeing people like comment things and they're wrong and I know they're wrong but it's like I'll just ride for my friends to a fault like it's even like maybe when you should walk away from someone but if you ride for them or maybe like

Your friend is really mad at someone But your friend is wrong, you know? Yeah, it does It bothers me too though Because you are Like you are If nothing else A very loyal friend I feel like you're very like

I don't know. I can't like... I just like I have my real people's back and my real friends outside of this fake awful world where everyone is best friends and not every day. And I can also say like I can take some accountability and blame for that because like in the influencer world, I'll play into it. I'll be like, oh my God, Bryce is my best friend. Yeah. Bryce is my best friend forever. But he's like my LA influencer fun friend, not like literally...

My core group of people, you know? So maybe I could see where there's some confusion there. Like people just thinking people are closer than they are because of the shit they post, but... Yeah. I don't know. I get why it bothers you, but I don't think it should. Yeah. Maybe one day I'll see her and we'll talk it out in person. Yeah. If she can explain to me why she feels like I switched up, I would take accountability and apologize, I guess. Honestly, maybe it didn't hold much weight. Sometimes she'd just be saying things. Like, honestly, I swear she just...

It's so fun. I love like watching her on a podcast because she'll just be like, yeah, and this person, fuck this person. Five days sober navigating life. We'll see how long we go. I'm about to go to dinner with everyone. We are after this. But we'll both be sober. Yeah, and that's going to be fun. And we'll see if I'm sure we'll get some content out of that. That's probably the best thing about being sober is watching everything that happens with like a clear head. The reason I wanted to do it with you is like, I just feel like it's fun to do it together, but it's hard because like,

So far I haven't been around you and other people just other people guys. Thank you so much. Should we just should we or go ahead?

Go ahead. With you, they're just like, oh, okay, good. Yeah, that's true. That's true. It takes, I feel like it takes like a month. They have to know you're serious about it and nobody thinks I'm serious about it. It took 30 days of me the first time around, like really being like, no, no, no, no, no for people to eventually stop. And then that's when it got like better too. Cause it's like, I hated going out and that's all everyone wanted to talk to me about. You know what I mean? Like, I was like, do I just fake it? Like, because I just like, like, you know, being a whole topic of conversation.

Anyway, let's go to dinner. Let's have a good night. Fuck everyone. Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Canceled Podcast. Love you.