Homestead (Premium E277) Sample
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If you're hearing this, well done. You found a way to connect to the internet. Welcome to the QAA podcast premium episode 277, the homestead movie and merch night. As always, we are your host, Jake Rockatansky, Brad Abrahams, Julian Fields, and Travis View.

Folks, we have an absolute treat slash trick for you today. We are going to be talking about Angel Studios' latest movie in theaters now and pirated onto our computers, Homestead. Now, this is a movie that seems to be built entirely on selling prepper gear.

Now, what if, what if this is very important? What if an infomercial for thousands of products was launched by nuking LA? It's the best infomercial ever made. McDonough has done it again, folks. If two immigrants like panic nuked LA with like acne bombs, like big yellow barrels with red radiation signs on them, they blew up LA. I didn't.

that there was this whole, like, merch tie-in. When we were talking about the episode in Siglob, I was like, oh, Angel Studios, they did Sound of Freedom. They got a movie about a nuke in L.A. This is perfect. I'm going to be doing a movie night. And then when we just jumped on the recording, Julie was like, tell me you got all the merch. And I was like, what, what?

I extensively wrote in Signal, but Jake has a variety of mental illnesses that make him not read any of my posts. That is so true. It's like my posts have been so abusive that he blocks them all out. And so he doesn't get any of the information he needs from me.

You know, I have, and maybe this is for better or for worse, I have all notifications turned off on my phone. Oh my God, man. Because I don't like it buzzing or beeping or anything, and I don't like my attention being called to it. Turn off the sound in the buzzer! That's what everyone does!

And they leave the notifications. I have no notifications. So the only way I see stuff on my phone is if I actively remember to go in and check it. So what will happen sometimes is I'll go into the signal chat and there will have been an entire conversation that took place. And I'll just kind of, you know, like speed readers will sort of fill in the gaps with their imagination. I sort of do that with work chat. Wow, that's good. And then we end up in...

We end up in situations like this. Guys, audience, one colleague for sale, barely used. I think, like, no, I think very used, not refurbished. Somebody please refurbish me. But fortunately for us, Julian had a keen eye

eye on both the SkyMall-esque online catalog for all of the prepper gear featured in the movie. So we're going to be peppering in as we break down this absolute piece of shit. I hated watching this. This was awesome. You're so fucking wrong about this. I enjoyed myself. I was smiling throughout. Jake and I are going to bully you into submission over this one. I really doubt that because...

This is the finest representation of America and Americans. It has successfully ascertained that all Americans are craven, they are cowardly, they panic when any treats get taken away, and even the ones that are prepared are savage, murderous maniacs ready to turn on their brethren at any point and shoot them right through the heart.

It's awesome. There's nobody to save anybody else. The character that's at the moral apex of the movie is like a deluded Joan of Arc, like God-brained lunatic. It's awesome. It's awesome. I think it's perfect. The problem is, though, it's just so boring. What do you mean? Don't you like a good pastiche? Why do you need a movie? Why do you need a movie when you can have a series of poorly written conversations that are advertising products? Just a string of infomercials.

That's all it was. Have you ever wondered what happens when a stock photograph comes to life?

Yes. I was wondering the whole time I'm watching it. I'm like, why does this look like absolute shit? It's because you can buy every part. That's it. And they have to do like the product thing. It's like when, you know, when I used to make advertisements for these big companies, it's like, you know, the soft drink would want the can turned in the proper way. The drinking has to look a certain way. So every part of this movie is trying to be like a grimy end of the world thing, but

they have to be wearing brand new things and like logo turned to the camera and just, so it's so awkward. I love it. Each shot of a product is, is about two times as long as it should be editorially just lingering on every logo. See herein lies the problem. Now, if I had gone into this with my capitalist brain,

that everything I was seeing was potentially that I could look it up online and see the prices and read the description, I think I would have had a fucking blast. But instead, I went into this like wanting a post-apocalyptic movie, which is like one of my favorite genres. 2012, Independence Day, Greenland. No, no, no, no, no. This is David Lynch. This is the unreality of America. This is like a perfect...

a perfectly unhinged deconstructed mess that only exists in like the most psychotic like what if Prepperism but SkyMall like what if it's just it's perfect it's where we we need to be right now

And the reason why you dissociate it is because that is what American experience is now. It's a dissociative experience and it's beautiful. But they could have copied. There's so many, and they did copy in so many ways like the normal tropes and we'll get into it. What if movie was trailer for a television show? You know, what if there's nothing?

Nothing can be distinguished anymore. It's a mess. It's Mulholland Drive. David Lynch would be proud. Absolutely not. Now, if you wanted to watch a movie, if you wanted to watch a movie about a paranoid group of ex-military preppers do their best to manage a doomsday bunker in the Colorado Rocky Hills, this is not that movie.

But what if they were living at like an olive garden? What if olive garden was like a fortress?

It's so good. It's so good. You guys are so fucking wrong about this movie. God, I really, I fucking, I feel sorry for you. And what's more, I would like to alert the U.S. government that we have a Canadian national in fucking Texas, so highly arrestable. He is pirating your movies. Homestead pirated in English. I didn't pirate this. And distributed, legally distributed. I did not pirate this movie.

I did hate. I don't know how you guys got it. I went to the theater. Look, I...

Well, after seven years of doing this podcast, we finally have a crazy role reversal in which Julian is loving this piece of shit movie. He's into the products. He's into the advertising. It all makes sense to him. No, no, no. And I am criticizing the lack of artistry in this post-nuclear Los Angeles. This is...

We're in a different era. No, but what you need to understand is that you are in denial about where we are at. The reason you don't enjoy this movie is because you have not accepted things about the American experience that I am beyond. Okay? I am fucking sitting on the moon looking down at this country from above. I am Google Maps. You are just one of the little people they drop into the map. You only have a tiny little street view. I am fucking galactic. It's rude.

It is rude to tell people what they are. Nobody likes to be told what they're thinking, who they are, and where they are. I am fucking holding you and toying with you. You and Brad are little Playmobiles. I'm making you hug each other. Can you kick Julian off the stream? I am here! Talk about this film. I am alive! I am alive!

I'm going to put Julian up for sale in our merch catalog for the end of the world. He's pristine, not scuffed at all. Expensive. $22,000. Same as the Hummer. Okay. Dick don't work so well, but rest is fine. No, brain don't work so well either. Okay, I got a lot of back pain. Listen, whatever. Rebate. He's got indigestion too, folks, but he makes one hell of a cup of coffee. Speaking of David Lynch. For you, my friend, lower price.

You've been listening to a sample of a premium episode of the QAA podcast. For access to the full episode, as well as all past premium episodes and all of our podcast miniseries, go to patreon.com slash QAA. Try

Travis, why is that such a good deal? Well, Jake, you get hundreds of additional episodes of the QAA podcast for just $5 per month. For that very low price, you get access to over 200 premium episodes, plus all of our miniseries. That includes 10 episodes of Man Clan with Julian and Annie, 10 episodes of Perverts with Julian and Liv, 10 episodes of The Spectral Voyager with Jake and Brad, plus 20 episodes of Trickle Down with me, Travis View.

It's a bounty of content and the best deal in podcasting. Travis, for once, I agree with you. And I also agree that people could subscribe by going to patreon.com slash QAA. Well, that's not an opinion. It's a fact. You're so right, Jake. We love and appreciate all of our listeners. Yes, we do. And Travis is actually crying right now, I think, out of gratitude, maybe? That's not true. The part about me crying, not me being grateful.