Rage Rooms, Four-Year Cruises, Post-Election Feels | Tom Colicchio
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This is The Daily Show with your host, Ron.

Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Ronnie Chang. We got so much to talk about tonight. South Koreans sample martial law and say no thanks. Louis Black tells you how to survive the next four years. And Pete Hegseth is on day three of his news bender. So let's get into another edition of Trump 2.0, coming for the White House. I'm going to come.

Donald Trump is still constructing his next administration, but he seems to be doing it the same way that that billionaire built that Titanic submarine, because it's imploding immediately.

in peril. Pete Hegseth back on the hill with his bid for defense secretary in doubt. Will another Trump nominee be forced out? A growing number of senators have signaled they are not behind Trump's defense secretary nominee, Pete Hegseth. Who is the president-elect considering to replace him? Will Pete Hegseth's nomination survive the day? It's a real question. Wow, this would be very sobering news for Pete Hegseth if he wasn't shit-faced right now. I mean...

If HEGSF doesn't get confirmed, this is really gonna make people question Trump's strategy of giving the most unemployable people on Earth the hardest jobs that ever existed. And honestly, I kind of feel bad for this guy. I mean, he had it made. A cushy job on Fox News, a side hustle selling macho garbage on right-wing Instagram...

A loving third family. And then Trump comes along and offers him a job, and now his life is kind of up. I mean, who could have seen that coming other than Matt Gaetz, Mike Pence, Rudy Giuliani, Michael Cohen, and everyone else Trump has ever come into contact with? Hey, uh, anyone heard from Herman Cain lately?

He's dead. Google it. And maybe one of the reasons why Pete Hegseth can't seem to extinguish this dumpster fire of his nomination is because more people keep throwing garbage into the dumpster.

Yesterday, new allegations of excessive drinking also emerging about the decorated combat veteran. NBC News spoke with 10 current and former Fox News employees who worked with Hegseth on one of the network's morning shows and say the former co-host drank in ways that concerned them. Two saying on more than a dozen occasions they smelled alcohol on Hegseth before he went on air. Okay.

Before you judge, yes, his show starts at 6 in the morning, but he was still drinking from the night before, okay? So it's not sad. It's awesome.

I will say, it's weird that we're arguing about the drinking, because even if he was stone-cold sober, he's a TV host who ran two veterans' organizations into the ground. He's not qualified to run the Pentagon anyway. Okay? This is like saying, hey, yo, this cat can't be pilot. He has a drinking problem. Okay, then maybe this cat can be a pilot. It's very cute. But...

You know what? This might be for the best. The first step to sobriety is your co-workers admitting that you have a problem. And look, we don't have any hard evidence that Pete Hegseth was drinking before work, but if you watched his show very carefully, you might have picked up some subtle clues that he liked to knock them back.

I've always wanted to do this. Oh, look at that. Look at that. I will not be abstaining from alcohol. Possession is nine tenths of a minute. We have three more hours. Maybe if I do well, I'll get a pint. A little bit of champagne. There you go. I'm going to get another refill. Hold on. Champagne is my problem when it comes to hangovers. It just is. But it fixes the problem in the morning because you have a little bit more champagne and then your problem goes away.

Again, this show airs at 6 a.m., but as Pete Hegses always says, hey, it's 11 a.m. somewhere.

So, Hegseth is losing the president, he's losing the senators, he's losing his co-workers. I mean, does he have anyone left on his side? This just in, Pete Hegseth's mother just sitting down for an interview. He's very smart. He loves his country. He's a good dad. He's an amazing son and father. I wouldn't be sitting here if I didn't believe he's the man for the job.

What kind of parent-teacher conference are we watching right now? Because the future Secretary of Defense needs his mom to come out and defend him? I thought you were against women in combat roles. And besides, I never saw Donald Rumsfeld be like, hey, I have a warning for the Taliban. Mom, you tell them.

Now, the reason Pete's mom is part of this story is because a few years ago, during his second divorce, his mom sent him an email where she called him, her own son, a habitual cheater, liar, and abuser of women. But now she's saying, eh,

Don't worry about it. Let's go back seven years, which if we all went back seven years, we would see that maybe we were not the people we are today. I want people to look at Pete, understand him for who he is today, and to disregard the media. That was seven years ago. And most of it is misinformation. What misinformation? You wrote the email. You're the one who told us he's a piece of shit.

And by the way, seven years ago wasn't ancient history, okay? We still have the same Spider-Man. Overall, things don't look good for Pete Hegseth. But the good news is he has the perfect solution.

Because then you have a little bit more champagne, and then your problem goes away. Okay, but thank Buddha. Let's move on to a story that doesn't involve Trump right now. Yesterday, out of nowhere, the incredibly unpopular president of South Korea declared martial law. And then a few hours later, after everyone got mad, he was like, hey, you know what? Forget it. That was a stupid idea. How about that Rosé song? Oh, but then, oh, but then, oh, but then, oh, but then, oh, but then.

To me, the craziest thing about this whole episode is what happened in South Korea during the few hours of martial law. The announcement sparking massive protests in Seoul, this woman's confrontation with an armed soldier going viral as she screams, aren't you embarrassed at him? Holy shit, she knows that's a gun, right? She's grabbing it like it's a thing that doesn't shoot bullets. She's like, is this a vacuum cleaner? What's this button do? I want to see it.

This wasn't the only time a protester stood up to the military in South Korea. Check out this dude when a soldier tries to take his phone. I know everyone thinks all Asians know martial arts. And let me be clear, stereotypes are harmful. But did you see that shit?

That dude single-handedly Aikido-ed the soldier into surrendering. I mean, that uncle is either really protective of democracy or very concerned about what people are going to see on his phone. By the way, Trump, if you're paying attention, can we get that guy as Secretary of Defense? I mean, his defense is incredible. He just did that. For more on the fallout in South Korea, let's go live outside the South Korean parliament with Josh Johnson.

Josh, Josh, Josh. What's going on over there? Uh, yeah, look. You seriously asking me? I feel like you might know more about this than me. Why? Come on, Ronnie. You know why. Because I'm the host? No. Because I'm more well-read than you? That's not it. Because I'm better looking?

No, because it's a Korea story and you're... From around there. What the f***, man? I'm not Korean, okay? I'm Malaysian. That's a totally different country. Calm down. Malaysian has Asian in it. It's closer than me. I'm clearly out of my depth here. The politics, the language, even the food. They offer me some of their soul food and not one candied yam or collard green.

Josh, I don't expect you to just know what's going on there. We sent you there to do a report, okay? So just do your job and ask around. And what do you think I'm doing? I found an Asian person, and I'm asking around right now. Yo, that's racist, dude. All right, you're black, so what? I'm supposed to ask you about what's going on in Zimbabwe? Oh, Zimbabwe going through it, Ronnie. All right.

They just had to raise interest rates to 36% to keep the currency from an inflation crisis, which could collapse President Managua's government. Okay, well, that's a lucky guess, okay? Economies collapsing in Africa, that's all of them. That's racist. No, you're racist.

Look, just give me your best analysis of what's going on in Korea right now. All right. Well, frankly, I'm not surprised at all. We've all known for years that Kim Jong-un is crazy. Of course he's going to pull some shit like this. Josh, that's North Korea, okay? You're in South Korea. It's a different country. Damn, Ronnie. The Asian guy seems to know a lot about Asia.

I guess I'm racist and right. God damn it. Forget it. Josh Johnson, everybody. When we come back, Louis Black will help you deal with the election, so don't go away. Hey, everybody. Jon Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show. It's going to be coming out...

Every Thursday. So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGIT. Thank God it's Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election, economics, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.

And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance, it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to The Weekly Show with Jon Stewart wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome back to The Daily Show. When a new story falls through the cracks, Louis Black catches it for a segment we call Back in Black. It's already been a month since the election. I guess time flies when I'm not ripping out what's left of my pubes.

Since Trump's victory, half the country is excited and the other half is still at home in the fetal position. Me, I'm coping by shutting off the news for a while and watching something a little cozier, like who killed John Bonet Ramsey. Baby, it's cold outside and so is this case.

But for those Democrats able to leave the House, this is what they're doing. An art installation on the walls of a 14th Street subway stop is encouraging people to put their thoughts on Post-it notes. It invites everyone to leave their feelings about this week's presidential election. Things like, I'm so scared, but I love this life more than I fear darkness. What the f*** is this?

but if you have a breakdown on the subway, you're supposed to jump in front of it. Subway walls are for only two things, mysterious piss stains and ads for Shen Yun. Sure, it's a cult, but those concubines sure can boogie. And who are these people writing their deepest feelings on a train platform? The only subway thoughts I have are, is that guy shitting?

And why am I being stabbed in that order?

But if writing postage is a little too subtle, you can react to the election loss the American way. Violence. Rage rooms have seen a spike in business since the election. It's a place where you can go in, smash plates, televisions, anything else you can find to let off steam. In fact, in the immediate days after the election, they say the number of reservations have tripled. A unique way to smash away that stress.

Look out, everyone. The libs are pissed and they're coming for grandma's fine china. Democrats can't even get mad correctly. Conservatives storm the Capitol. Meanwhile, Democrats are like, are these crowbars ethically sourced?

When shit gets bad, you don't smash things like a toddler. You let it eat away at you from the inside like a big boy with stress-related hemorrhoids. Which reminds me, this segment is brought to you by Preparation H. Preparation H. I'm old, I'm angry, and I'd like some free Preparation H.

But if you'd like to be sad without getting a shard of glass in your retina, you could always venture outdoors and get in touch with your inner coyote. Liberal women are holding what they call primal scream events to release their fury, screeching at the top of their lungs at Lake Michigan. Okay, let me get this straight.

Plan A for the Democrats was to vote, and plan B is to scare the f*** out of Sturgeon? I don't know about you, but I'm feeling optimistic about 2028. Trust me, screaming doesn't change anything. I've been doing it for 40 years, and I'm still at the same f***ing desk! God, I've wasted my life!

But if screaming beside a lake doesn't cure your election blues, maybe riding on a boat will.

Did the presidential elections make you want to jump ship from America for a little while? Well, Villa V Residences is a cruise line that actually lets you take a long-term dwelling aboard its Odyssey ship. Now, there's a one-year escape from the reality or a two-year midterm selection. And if your election hangover is just really, really bad, well, there's a three-year everywhere but home and a four-year skip forward option. Ooh, a four-year cruise? Sign me up.

What better cure for an election hangover than half a decade of pina coladas and freeze-dried scallops? Trump's going to slash Medicaid just in time for me to get super herpes from a Swiss widow.

Now that every country in the world can see that liberals are terrified, the smart ones are cashing in. Well, a small Italian village is offering cheap homes to Americans who want to leave the U.S. Yes, so the town of Olale has moved in ready homes for up to $10,000. Homes that need...

A little TLC. They're available for just over a dollar. Village officials hope this will revive it after its population declined. Oh, great. An Italian village whose population disappeared. That doesn't sound ominous at all. I'm happy to buy an abandoned home and find out what disemboweled all the cattle. Listen, America may be f***ed,

but that doesn't mean I'm moving into Luigi's Haunted Mansion. Plus, plus America already has a creepy Italian shithole. It's called New Jersey. Wow. Not what I expected. But...

But hey, if you're willing to spend good money to avoid these next four years, I'm willing to take it to you. Okay? Take it from you. That's why I'm offering a product of my own. I call it the Forever Sleepy Time Brick. Just shackle it to your foot and find the nearest body of water. Screaming optional. Ronnie? All right. Thank you, Lawrence.

We'll be back. Tom Colicchio will be joining me on the show. So don't go away.

Hey everybody, Jon Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? Listen to The Weekly Show with Jon Stewart wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is an eight-time James Beard award-winning chef, restauranteur, and head judge on Bravo's hit series Top Chef. He's the author of a new cookbook memoir called Why I Cook. Please welcome the great Tom Colicchio. ♪♪

Wow. One of the most respected chefs in America. Thanks for coming on the show. Great to meet you. Likewise. Great person as well. Your book, cookbook and memoir, you've managed to trick us into reading about your story in between. You kind of hide it in between these recipes here. And it's well written. I encourage everyone to go read it. For a chef, the stereotype is everyone's very angry, but you write this with so much love.

What is the real you? Is it this guy? It's this guy. This is it. Yeah, that's it. Because I know this is kind of like a hacky question, but I just got to ask it because you also bring up in the memoir when you are up and coming, you're being trained by these legendary chefs.

The training in the kitchen was pretty hardcore. Yeah, it was. People yelling at you. People were yelling. But I think there's a reason for that. Especially when I was in France working, I got a sense that they couldn't communicate any other way. That was the only way they could actually get a point across. Right, the French. It was just yelling and screaming. And so you got used to it. Right. But even in America, you were training in America. Oh, yeah, sure. Same thing. The American chefs. Same thing, though. So I guess my question to you is like, I mean. They were yelling at you in a different language. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, f*** is f***. It doesn't matter. Exactly, yeah. Because I feel like, I don't know enough about cooking at all, but with comedy, I feel like there is a certain amount of toxicity that you need to endure to get good at this, you know? And so do you feel the same way with cooking, you know? I guess, what would you say to all these woke sissies who are...

complaining about being mistreated in the kitchen. Like, really, are you like, hey, like tough enough? Or are you like, hey, something's... Not anymore. Not anymore? No, we don't do that anymore. No, no, we can't do that. No, things have changed. When I was coming up, it was 40 years ago. It was a very different world that we lived in. And it was, you know, there wasn't a whole lot of, you know, in-your-face screaming and yelling, but there was a lot of hard,

long hours and there was a lot expected of you but it wasn't the yelling and screaming that you think about but the misogyny was obviously there the sort of machismo you know the kitchen you know you burnt yourself that was a badge of honor how many times you burnt your arms and things like that and so but I think that's a lot of that's going away

Right. But I guess the question again to you is like, is that is it going away for the is it good that it's going away or do you feel like something's missing in the transfer of knowledge? No, I don't think anything's missing in transfer of knowledge. I think that it's going away for the right reasons. You know, the idea of getting someone to do something through intimidation doesn't really work. I mean, maybe maybe it works in the military. I have no idea. But it certainly it certainly isn't isn't necessary to get your point across.

And I think also, if you look back, you know, chefs that were running kitchens... Sorry to interrupt you. Actually, I spoke to a military guy about this. Because as an Asian person who grew up in Singapore, Malaysia, I've been yelled at my whole life to where learning was being yelled at. And I asked the military guys about this. And the U.S., I mean, small sample size, but one of the U.S. military guys said that when you're yelling, you've already lost control. You lost control. Meaning you shouldn't be in that situation in the first place. You don't have to be. I think it's...

matter of 40 years ago the chefs working kitchens they weren't able to communicate exactly what they're looking for and so they were running around and screaming the whole day because that they thought that was the way that you had to motivate people that's the way they're motivated and some somewhere along the lines me for me and I think I mentioned this in a book Thomas Kelly know it well that was that was different that was so we're going to drop you you got that was more psychological nonsense and playing the game he played a lot of games and he's a great chef

Um, but, uh, I just had an issue with the way, um, he was talking to me. You know, I-I-I-I, you know, I promised myself at a certain point if I got a restaurant that I wasn't gonna sort of... The things that... The way I was treated, I was gonna break that. I was gonna do something different. And-and, you know, did I lose my temper at times? Absolutely. Um, but-but, uh, nowadays, you kind of walk away. Before you lose your temper, you walk away. Okay. Okay. No, I-I'm genuinely interested in this, 'cause you're...

arguably the most respected chef in America. If you're saying that, "Hey, hey, we don't need to be yelling in kitchens," then I guess everything that's happening in the bear is completely unnecessary, 'cause those guys... Yo, watch out. He's going like, "What are you guys doing?"

I don't know if you saw the third season. We went the whole lot of yelling in the third season. It wasn't that good, right? That's something I can't speak to. You speak to the kitchen stuff. I think there's a lot of people who think that the third season was a little slower. I love and watch the band. Not me. It's the critics that say that. I'm still available for guest appearances on the band.

Yeah, and again... They're going to take my cookbook. I have a cookbook on the shelf there. They're going to take it off now. No, they won't. Season four, my book's gone. No, you see, you don't yell at it anymore. You just say that they suck quietly. Very quietly. That's what you're doing now. You're not in the kitchen going, you suck. You're on The Daily Show going, you suck. Like, I moved to New York City when I was 30 years old from Australia. I was living in Australia at the time. When I moved here, I was just...

kind of what struck me about the food in America was that it tasted like shit. -Yeah. - Like, is that-- is there a reason for that? -Well, where were you going?

I was eating out of toilets most... No, I mean, in general, I do feel like there's something in the American psyche that, for most people, the junk food is the norm. Right, right. The idea of nutrition is very skewed, and the produce is weird. So I don't know if you... Am I being a stuck-up asshole, or is there something to this? No, no, you're not. But I think what you're experiencing, in this country, nutrition's expensive, but calories are cheap.

- Yes. - So you can go out and buy a bunch of junk, and it's cheap, but it's not nutritious. But you try to go to the farmer's market and buy great produce and stuff, it's very expensive. - Right. - And so that's part of the problem here with this country. - So is there a way to overcome that kind of financial access to nutrition? - Yeah. - No. - No. - No. - Okay.

It's complicated because the average person who doesn't really quite understand would say, well, subsidize. Subsidize fruits and vegetables. You really can't do that. There's really no subsidies for fruit and vegetables. There's subsidies for corn and soy. That's about it. And the subsidies are all about crop insurance and not insurance the way we know insurance. It just guarantees a price. So some people say that maybe what we can do is if you put enough research and development behind

figuring out ways to grow more fruits and vegetables on the same acreage, then actually you'll have more in the system and prices will come down. But that's not happening. That's not happening. No, no. The government looks at fruits and vegetables and they're actually labeled specialty crops. They don't pay attention to them at all. Okay. So we do eat like shit and there's no way to change this in the near future. But what is American food? Right? Because when you came to America, you thought you were eating American food, but what were you? You were eating a... I was eating food by the pound at a bodega, which was...

I was amazed that you could... That Americans eat... When I came here, I was like, oh, New Yorkers are Americans. A lot of chopped cheese for you, huh? Right. And I was like, you know, these guys eat food by the pound. They measure it by the pound. No respect for how they cook it. They just dump it up. But in restaurants, you'll find something different. Sure. So it all depends. No, I agree. I mean, obviously, I've been more educated in American food now. And like I said, but I guess the thing is, I'm on TV. I can go to a restaurant. Well, that's what I'm saying. Because everyone wants me in their restaurant. As your economic...

But what about the people-- As your economics changed, you started going to better restaurants. And all of a sudden, the food got better, right? Yeah. So the system works exactly the way it's set up to work. I'm not saying this is a good system. But it's set up where if you have money, it works. If you don't, you struggle. And it's the same-- it's a bad system that we have in this country. Someone applauded that. No, no. Someone was like, the system works. No.

What I'm saying is it's not a good system, but it works the way it's set up to work. So, I mean, what is... I don't know enough about this, and that's why I wanted to ask you about it. From what you're saying, it sounds like the only way kind of people who are less financially successful can eat well is they have to make choices in their life to go, hey, I'm going to buy, you know, less...

I've iPads and I'm going to eat. I don't know. I don't know what the answer is. But also part of it is cooking. If you can cook for yourself, you can probably do a lot more for your family. If you're relying on fast food and you're relying on someone making the food for you and be delivered to your house, that's a different story. And then also learning how to stretch that food, you know, learning how to use it all, learning how to use leftovers. And so you can you can. I mean, I think I think the numbers now roughly a quarter of what is purchased at home gets wasted.

25% of what you purchase at home goes in the garbage. Okay. And so that's a good start. So we're talking about food waste, which is another big problem. That's a bad thing, and it's a good place to start. It's a good place to start. Right, right. I mean, listen, I think if they started teaching home economics in school again, that would be great. That would really be great. Did they stop doing that?

No, no. In fact, they're going to get rid of the whole education system nowadays. Oh, no, we all know what education is. Exactly. It doesn't matter. So nothing matters anyway, I guess. Everyone's going to be dumb and unhealthy. Exactly. How long do you think? Four years? We have over four years before... I mean, you touched upon this just now, but is there...

Like Eleven Madison, one of the most famous restaurants in the world, and your friend. Vegan restaurant, yeah. Yeah, it became vegan. And I think they're not just vegan, but they also push sustainability in food and restaurants and commercially. So, I mean, where do you think the future of sustainability of food in America is going? Do you think it's trending in a good place? Are we in a...

There's plenty of people talking about it. There's plenty of work that has to be done. I know for years I did a lot of work up on Capitol Hill. I co-founded an organization called Food Policy Action. I spent a good amount of time on the Hill looking at issues about sustainability. It's a complicated problem.

It almost is if it's such a non-issue for our government to try to figure out that this stuff has to happen through grassroots and sort of in your own communities. And it starts at home. It really does. If you want better food at home, learn how to cook. And you don't have to learn how to cook fancy food. You have to just learn the basics.

Learn the basics so you can actually cook for your family. And that's sustainable because you're buying produce that is sustainable. You're not relying on food that's over-processed with too much sugar, too much salt, too much fat in it. And you're going to end up with a healthy America, too. And so, yeah, but it's a complex problem because our system isn't set up to actually get fresh food to the masses. It's set up to get processed food to the masses.

So, yeah, that's bad. It is bad, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you can, I don't know if the government's going to fix this problem. I think this has to happen in communities and in your homes, in your actual homes. I think a great place would be school lunch. I mean, that's one place that I think we could do a lot better. Uh-huh.

And there are some great chefs that... I mean, the chef at one of the most famous restaurants in the world in Copenhagen, Noma, one of the chefs there decided that he didn't want to cook in fancy restaurants anymore and started cooking in school lunch programs and started a whole program called Brigade where he's trying to get professional chefs into schools. I mean, right now, everything that's in school is all mass-produced. And so I think we need to start there. Also, I think school lunch should be universally free across the board. Okay, yeah. All right, cool. That's...

That guy's not doing it in America, right? He's doing it in... Where's he doing it? No, he's doing it in America. Oh, he's doing it in America? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where is he doing it? I want to go to his school. I believe he started in Connecticut, but he's branching out. Okay, free lunch in Connecticut. I got to head down there. I got to enroll there. But, Chef, listen, I really appreciate you coming on the show. You're an American legend. Thanks for trying to help everyone eat properly. I'm sorry no one's listening to you. Thank you.

I wish we could all eat better. It's all going to change after tonight. Thank you for all that you do. Hey, everybody, Why I Cook is available now. Chef Tom Colicchio, everybody. We're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. That's our show for tonight. Now, here it is, your moment of Zedd.

A new survey by online magazine Intelligent reveals nearly 20% of Gen Z applicants brought their mom or dad with them to a job interview. Is that how you got this job? You brought your aunt? I brought my aunt and my mom. They can vouch for me.

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John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, The Weekly Show. We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to The Weekly Show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcasts.