Jenn Tran: You're Not Crazy...He's an Ass [VIDEO]
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What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy. Call Her Daddy.

Jen Tran, welcome to Call Her Daddy. Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. I'm so excited you're here. We have to give the Daddy Gang context of what we've been doing. Yes. So I'm upstairs. I'm prepping for the interview. I hear that Jen is here. I walk down the stairs and I hear like, where's the tequila? Where's the tequila? And I'm like, no, no, in a great way. And like, because I never know what the vibes are going to be from people. And I'm like, Jen, what's going on? And you're like, let's take shots. Like, I love it. Why did you want tequila today? Listen, you know,

I knew this was going to be a fun time. I knew we were going to like shoot the shit and just have fun. And like, what's the point of doing it without a little bit of tequila? No, I'm so happy. Also to give context, this is why my job is the best. I'm like, it is one o'clock on a Friday. And usually on a Friday, I'm like, ooh, maybe you can start drinking at like four o'clock with Jen. It's like, it is one o'clock. We are drinking tequila. We have our drinks. We have our seltzers. Congratulations. Thank you. You are about to be this season's bachelorette. Oof.

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Congratulations. Thank you. You are about to be this season's Bachelorette. The show is about to come out. How are you feeling? I'm honestly really excited for everyone to just see it. Like I feel like this whole chapter in my life like happened and I haven't seen anything about it yet. So it's like, did it really happen or not? But like obviously it did. So I'm really excited for everyone to see it. And I think, you know, there's a lot of opinions on the season. So I just I know how amazing it's going to be. And I know like what a journey it was for me. And I'm so excited. Yeah.

Well, speaking of opinions, what are you talking about? Like from your perspective, what are you talking about? Like there's a lot of opinions on the season. Yeah. I mean, there's no like running around it. Like I came back from filming and there was a lot of people, um,

wanting somebody else or wishing that I was American. So there's a lot of racism around it too. And there's just a lot of people who want to have input on it and wish that it was somebody else and whatnot. So I think that you just can't win. You know, people were like, she's too boring or she's too crazy. She wants to take shots. It's like, God forbid, I want to take a shot. I didn't know that once you get engaged, you can't take a shot. Or once you find love, you can't take a shot. So, I mean...

It's crazy how many people have an opinion about it. Okay, can we talk about that for a minute? Because I agree. I feel like people have always like...

there's no secret that like if you look up the lineup of the bachelor and the bachelorette like it is a lot of white people that have like historically been like the leads and i'm so fucking happy we're african-americans yes we're african-americans and i think that you being the first asian-american is so fucking incredible but also it's like why why is that the focus of people's negativity like how did you feel when you're seeing those comments and shit

In a weird way, it makes me feel validated that there needs to be change, right? Because I lived my whole life having, you know, some people telling me racism doesn't exist. Like Asians don't have to deal with it. Like you're the better minority. Nobody cares. And to have these things about me said online, particularly about my race, like...

It just validates the fact that there is so much hate in people's hearts still. And it's still such a prevalent thing in this day that I'm happy to take on the brunt of it if it means that I'm making a change for people that are going to come after me. You know? First of all, I...

Thank you for saying that because I think like it's not your job to like be a spokesperson for it. But now that you're in this position, like I can imagine so many young girls are like, let's fucking go, Jen. Yes. Representation. I also feel like I said to you before we started, I'm like, you came in here and your energy and your vibe is like, oh,

I feel like we could be friends and you smell amazing. I just have to say that. I'm sorry. This whole studio, everyone is nodding their head. This whole studio smells amazing. You smell so good. I'm going to need to get your perfume. It's Caroline Herrera. I was, it's funny because I was in a hotel room and I was like, I need to find a perfume. And my producer was like, you're literally going to a podcast. Like no one's going to smell you through the camera. And I was like,

I was like, I don't care. I need to smell good at all times. It's affecting me. And I'm like, oh, this is fabulous. A little tequila, a little Caroline Herrera. Perfect. So I'm seducing you too. It's perfect. It's perfect. I'm getting in the vibes. I'm getting in the mood. I need to know where you were and how you felt when you got the call of The Bachelorette. Like,

take me to that moment. Yeah, it was crazy. I mean, like things have been in the works for like months at that point. And I just like didn't know what was going to happen. And, you know, the clock was ticking down. So I was like, maybe it's just not me. Maybe it's just not happening. But like we've had meetings about it and interviews about it. So it was in the back of my head and I was getting back from the gym. I was in my car and I just get like this text from like one of like the producers being like, do you want to hop on a call really quick? And I was like, oh, God, what could this be?

um and I kind of knew but I was also like really nervous because I felt like you know my whole life was gonna change um but obviously it was also like did I really want it like I had been thinking about it for months and months and it's a big change you know it's like I'm a very private person so it's like do I really want my whole life to be on blast like this and I knew that I was gonna have to take a lot of heat um for many different reasons and and so I was like yes I want to find love but is this the

capacity that I want to do it in. And so it took a while for me to like think about it. But I mean, I hopped on the call and immediately I was like, obviously, yes, I'm going to do it. Right. Right. It's just so crazy because you're right. And I think that's what people forget is like

it we've now watched the bachelor for so many seasons. We love the bachelor franchise, but like this does completely change your life. And like before all of this, you're a physician's assistant. I'm watching a student. I'm watching your tick tocks. You're like going into surgery, like getting them prepped. And I'm like, this is a big shift from you being in like scrubs and like doing your thing during the day to then like

Now the whole world is about to watch you hopefully fall in love. I had Maria on and she was really open about like they had offered me the role. It wasn't right for me. Like, can you tell me from your experience, like seeing all the conversation around like Maria or Daisy, like how, how did that, how did you like feel about everything? Yeah.

Yeah, so obviously I didn't have my phone at the time all of this was going down because we had went right into filming after it was all announced. And coming back to all of that...

Yeah, obviously I was really disappointed to see all that because, I mean, the truth of the matter is, like, there's a lot of narratives out there and they're not necessarily the truth. You know, the show has been going on for years and years, 21 years of this show specifically. And every season there are multiple people in contention for the role. Multiple people are being interviewed or doing meetings about it all, doing fittings or filming intro packages. And it's never really you until it's you.

Interesting. So that's why I was a little disappointed is because, you know, the narratives out there aren't exactly the truth. And I think that when you look at it all, like the show has been going on for so long and, you know,

Look, based on the history of it all, like there's always multiple people. So it's not you until it's you. Oh, my God. OK, wait. I didn't even think about that. You before all of these things were happening, you were in the middle of filming. Yeah. Wait. So like when that Call Her Daddy episode came out, you didn't even know that Maria came on the show. I would. No, I hadn't seen it until I had gotten back. Yeah. Oh, my God. OK, so you had it wasn't like a last minute thing people are asking you.

No, no, no, no. I had – we had meetings about it. We talked about it for months. And then they asked me and I had the choice and I chose to do it. I said yes. And the thing with like the narrative sets out right now is like it was disappointing to come back from this incredible journey for myself. And then to see all the speculation around it and to almost have –

these things kind of take away from what my journey was you know I'm I'm kind of at a point in my life where like I'm not gonna let anyone take claim to that I'm not gonna let anyone like like

I don't know, like have some sort of role in that because my entire life, you know, the way I grew up was kind of crazy. And then, you know, I've always like thought about others first. And I went into health care because I care about other people so much. And it's been a it took a while for me to really find my voice in certain things. And this is something that like, I'm so proud to be able to say, like, this is my time and this is my journey. And that's what I want it to be focused on, because I'm able to have a voice now to talk about it and to be able to

stand my ground on it is that this is my journey. I'm so happy about it. And I'm so happy for everyone to like finally see that. I appreciate you sharing this because I can imagine from your perspective when you come out that

Yeah, I think a lot of people were like, oh, like Jen's a runner up and Jen's just doing this. And like now hearing from you, you're like, we know like all of us were in talks and all of us were making these decisions and everyone was kind of up for it. I'm sure there was like three to four people that were in conversation. Have you talked to the other women? Like, yeah, yeah. I mean, everything, everything's good. You know, that's the thing about being in this world and being mature and being and having like, you know, just like.

Just knowing what world you're in and being a person and being mature about it all is that like we're all fine. Yeah. And it's all good. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Let's talk about your life before reality TV. Where did you grow up? I grew up in New Jersey.

Jersey girl. Yes. I was a PA girl, but I went to school in Jersey for high school. Oh, really? Where? Like Princeton area. Okay. Okay. So Jersey. Yes. North Jersey. And then I went to school at Pittsburgh for like a year and a half. Okay. Then I transferred to Wisconsin. I know. And then after Wisconsin, I'd moved to Boston for a couple of years. And that's kind of where my family like resides right now. What were you like in high school? In high school? Um,

honestly i was really shy okay i was really still kind of like coming into my own and like i played sports i played basketball i played lacrosse like that's kind of where i was like more outgoing or like more like found myself like having like a group of friends kind of thing but still like i was really really shy and i don't really think i fully understood like who i was yet

And even like in middle school, like I was like the most awkward kid ever. I had such an awkward face. I was like the chubbiest kid ever. And like I remember I had a crush on this guy and I remember I was like stalking him. Just a little. Like it was like after school and I was waiting for him to like come down the stairs or whatever because I knew what class he had because I was crazy or whatever. And I...

I saw him coming down and his friends were making fun of me for liking him. They were like, oh my gosh, like Jen Tran has a crush on you. Like how funny, like that's crazy. And like that was my middle school life essentially. No. Yeah. I relate to that. And I, every time I meet people that are like, no, like high school was a breeze or like middle school was a breeze. I'm like, oh, well fuck you. Yeah. Like what do you mean? What the hell? What do you mean by that? Yeah. Like now I'm like so grateful for like not feeling that way. But back in the day, it's like when you struggle with that, it's like,

It can like affect you obviously socially. But the thing is it builds character. Like I'm so happy that I had an awkward phase that I was like a little weird or like whatever it was because I think it makes you more grateful for like who you are now and I'm grateful for like figuring myself out so much more now. I agree. Did making friends come easy to you in high school? No.

um yes and no like because I played club sports like it was easy to like be friends with them and kind of stuff but I think like internally like I was having such a like who am I like how do I be cool like how do I just like like have everyone love me kind of thing and I wasn't really falling into like who I am and at the time like I was really still struggling with like figuring out my identity in terms of like

like my Vietnamese culture and like the American culture because both my parents are immigrants and they're both like very, very Vietnamese to the core. So I grew up with a lot of those values and there weren't a lot of people like me in my town. So I think it was a bit harder for me to like relate to people because I was going through so much at such a young age. So it was a lot of that. I'm curious, like did ever having like...

Like you're saying like you kind of had this like push and pull like oh my gosh like I want to lean into my culture but then also the kids around you are not like that like did it ever make you pull away more for your from your family or lean more into your family. I definitely pulled away a lot when I was growing up because it was just I wanted to be like everybody else right like when you're at that age and you're growing up and you just want to fit in you want to be like everybody else.

But it wasn't really until college where I got really exposed to a lot more diversity. And I also got tired of kind of like hiding who I am, you know, like college is like that new like sense of like you, like you get a chance to like rewrite yourself almost. So I was able to really do that in college and like embrace everything that makes me me and really embrace like my Vietnamese culture as well as like me growing up in America, you know. It's hard though when you're in those moments to like have perspective. Exactly. Yeah.

How are you with boys? Like high school, college, like what was the vibe, Jen? You know, I had a lot of issues. Okay. Like because I had an awkward phase in middle school and then high school, like I kind of started, was still awkward, but like started growing into my own a little bit. And then towards the end of high school, I'd say I really wanted to explore. And then I got into college and I really, really wanted to explore as well. And I was a little boy

crazy. And I ended up in a lot of bad situations that maybe I shouldn't have been in. Tell me everything. I love how you're like, I wanted to explore like such like a graceful way of saying like, I had my phase. I went for it. Okay, what do you mean you went down paths that maybe you shouldn't have? I just I think I really use my body for a lot of whatever, you know, and I think that I wasn't really fully respecting myself in those times. I

And at one point, like I just didn't know how relationships worked, right? Like I my parents are divorced and I never really had a good role model of love. So like going into college with that perspective, it didn't really help. And I was entering relationships that like were really bad for me. Like one time I was so delusional, naive that I was, you know, seeing this guy who essentially had a girlfriend, but I didn't know he had a girlfriend.

until I did know. But then he kept telling me, you know, like, we're broken up. It's no big deal. He was living with the girl at the time. And he drove me freaking insane. He drove me freaking insane. He would make dates up with me. He'd be like, yeah, meet me at this place at 9 p.m. And then he'd go home to his girlfriend, block my number so that every message I sent him afterwards would turn green. And little naive Jen was like, maybe he's going through a tunnel for like hours and hours and he just doesn't have service. Like, he's going through a tunnel.

tunnel I know like I was insane and then my college roommates had to deal with this like I would knock on the door and be like oh my gosh like he's not answering me what do I do like he's in a tunnel again tunnel aka he's like inside his girlfriend tonight and yes the tunnel is his girlfriend

Jen! It was crazy. No, but it's so relatable. Like, I have an episode that is either coming out or will have come out that I'm talking about. Like, when you are in the early stages of dating and you were insecure when you were younger, which I was, you can kind of find yourself almost not even, like,

evaluating your boundaries like you don't have boundaries you're just so happy someone's giving you attention yes and it's so intoxicating and it can be so like overwhelming that you don't have time that now you look back and you're like why didn't someone like literally like slap me across the head and be like wake up he's not in a tunnel bitch he has a girlfriend but like oh they did I had so many friends that did that but it wouldn't have

even matter it doesn't matter right no no no it's like the tunnel yeah yeah you're like no no he told me he loved me yesterday so like it's fine like it's crazy the things that I delusionally believed in back at the time and I appreciate you because obviously like my main demographic is women I appreciate you saying like I didn't like fully respect my body at the time I think that's like

sadly a very relatable thing because I think we still live in a man's world and if you're like going for these relationships you want men to like you and you want them to see you and you want to like

You want the attention and the validation and you can't give it to yourself yet because like you being you so far, you've just gotten like no success or you're like feeling bad about yourself. So when a guy starts to give you attention, you're like me. Yeah, me. And then if they start to act out, you're like, oh, that doesn't matter. Me. Yes. And then you're like, what more can I do to like keep this attention going? And then you drive yourself insane. And how long did that last?

tunnel boy tunnel boy probably like four six months six months four years no god no god no six months but see and then at the time I like there was a turning point in that where when I realized I was like oh he's like insane like he was actually like a sociopath and would like lie to me like crazy and like would never like own up to it

And then there was a turning point where I was like, okay, wait, now I'm going to play the game. Like if he's going to lie to me and do all this, like I'm going to do that. So then I started using him for like dinner and drinks and all this stuff. And then he'd be like, oh, can I come back to your apartment? Cause I could never go to his. Right. And I'd be like, sorry, like I got class early in the morning. Like I got to go, but thanks for dinner. Like, you know, I'm obsessed with you just casually. Cause I could never go to his cause he has a girlfriend. Oh,

Oh my gosh. But you know what's crazy is like that seems to be the most beautiful turn of events when you are just like under someone's thumb and you're just getting played and played and played. And then I don't know what it is. The sunrise is a little different that morning or like your phone looks a little different. Everything looks a little different. And you're like, oh my God. Motherfucker. Wait a fucking second. It's amazing.

over for you I've now I because it's like the repetitiveness of the cycle of them treating you like shit just one day you're like what if I just what if I just tilted it a little bit this way and all of a sudden you're now like in a little bit more of a position of power yes and then they really lose their shit because they're like yes they're like wait a second wait she suddenly she knows what's going on like standing up for herself wait a second that's self-respect that's not the girl that I wanted

Okay, so you have like, you went through it in college. Oh, for sure. I just had so many crazy relationships. And then even after college, I think I was still finding myself or I was I was growing more confident into who I am, but not grown confident in like what I wanted in a relationship and knowing what I wanted in that.

Wait, what kind of guys were you going for in college? Did you have a type? I mean, at the time, the guy that had a girlfriend was like somebody that I worked with in the restaurant. He was like kind of my boss. So like I had like a boss thing. I have like a power complex. I don't I don't know. Like a boss thing. Yeah. Like it was weird. But he wasn't that much older. Like he was like a year or two. Wait. So after he's like ignoring you in the tunnel, would you go to work together?

The next day. And he'd act like everything was fine. And he's like, oh, baby, I'm so sorry. Like, let me take you out tonight. Like, I was...

batshit crazy. I was like, I believed him because we worked together. I was like, he cannot be this crazy to lie to me and then go to work with me. We also, that like makes such a weird dynamic too, because you also have to like somewhat respect your boss. So naturally you're like, even if you wanted to be mad at him, you're taking orders from this man, which then becomes kind of hot again. That's the hot part of it. Now you're getting it. You've never had sex with your boss. God,

me think back. Like I was tempted. Oh my God. Okay. Jen, this is like great information. We're loving this. We're loving this. But that era is closed, right? Yeah. I had to learn a little bit and it was crazy, but no. And I hope, you know, I love these stories too, because I obviously know what we're about to watch on the bachelorette. It's like, I'm hoping, I know you're not wearing a ring, but like, we're obviously hoping you're engaged if that was what was meant to be. But I just was talking about a situation I had in college where I had this guy that just

kept it moving and like every every day it was a different thing and I was just trying to hold on for dear life right and I'm married and I talk about it though because when you look back at those things you have such different perspective and it almost is like you feel yes somewhat bad for yourself but not anymore once you've been that far away you're like whoa it just makes you empathetic towards other women that get themselves in that position where you

know how easy it can be to fall into that when you're not in a good place with yourself exactly and that i think is like there's no judgment like i'm sure there's so many girls listening right now that are at that place babes we've been there too been there been there we've been there in the trenches the only person that can pull yourself out of it is you and you just gotta like work through it and work through your insecurities and find your self-respect and yeah i mean i had so many friends trying to pull me out of it and i just didn't listen i just was like well what do you mean like he likes me

They're like, he has a girlfriend. You're like, yeah, but he's going to dump her. But he likes me. No.

Okay, you've I know you mentioned on your season of The Bachelor and you've mentioned today and I'm not ignoring you. I just I wanted to get to that place of like lightly talk about dating but like your parents dynamic. Obviously like we all are the way that we are because of like whatever happened in our home when we were younger. If you had to describe like your view of like love and marriage from your upbringing like how would you describe it? I would say like

What I saw between my parents, like, wasn't a true partnership, so...

what I kind of learned from that over the years is that marriage is a partnership and it's not one person doing everything. It's not one person calling the shots. It's not one person like succumbing to the other's power. It's really like a true partnership. And, you know, that's really what I want is to have a partner in it all and to have somebody really be on the same page as me and want the same things as me. Um,

And that's the only way like something's really going to work, right? Like love is in it, yes. But the partnership part of that has to be there too. Do you mind giving a little context of like –

What happened when you were younger with your parents dynamic? Yeah. Yeah. So I think, you know, my parents just started fighting at a really young age. And my mom was the type... Like, I think she grew up in kind of like a different culture in Vietnam where, like, the women, like, they cook, they clean, they do everything, you know, for their husbands. And I saw a lot of that growing up. And so...

It just... It wasn't healthy for them. And then they started fighting. But my mom would still do everything for my dad. And then, you know, my dad wasn't really a part of my life all that much when I was growing up. At least I have a brother who's nine years older. So he kind of has a different perspective on the whole thing because he's older than I am. And he spent more years with my dad. But when I came into the picture, my dad was really, like, living in the basement for most of my life and not really involved in, like, my school sports or, like, my schooling or, like, just, like...

my everyday activities or anything. So I didn't have a relationship with him really. And then at one point in college, our relationship was like cut off for good. We just kind of got into like a little tiff and it was just he decided he didn't want to be a part of my life anymore.

And, you know, it's sad, you know, to like think about it. But I also think that everything happens for a reason and I'm so much better for it. And I've grown so much more, you know, if somebody doesn't want to be a part of your life, like, why are you going to force them to? Yeah. And so, yeah, I mean, growing up, like it was very tumultuous. Like it was very much like I almost want to say like...

it was like a survive or not kind of environment. Like there was just so much fighting, so much aggression, so much just, I felt like I was in the background a lot of the times. And that's not to the fault of anybody. Like my mom did the best that she could, you know, she worked and she was a full-time parent and like she just like did so much for the family too. So I would never want to discredit her, but I think there was a lot that I had to work through internally and by myself because I felt like I was almost forced to be independent at a young age.

That can like, I mean, thank you for sharing that. First of all, I think that can really, really just like shape the way in so many ways that you become resilient. And like you said, you become independent, you become resilient.

this like self-reliant person where you know like there are some kids that are so fortunate that are like I have my mom and my dad or my mom and my mom or my dad and my dad and then when you don't have that you just learn that that's the norm and that's like and I think that's so beautiful that you're saying that on the other hand like

That's like really hard for a young kid to like you, you know, mentioning like there was aggression, there was this like that can make you kind of either turn inward or like.

act out like I feel like there's always like you can either go one way or another and then yeah to have that comment about like college like that's so sad obviously and I and I totally understand what you're saying there's like a positive to it but then that is like sad because it is a form of rejection yeah yeah and that's tough yeah and I think that's why like for the longest time I pushed off like my past growing up and my past with my dad because I was like

it doesn't affect me in my everyday life because I've forgotten about it but it does play a role in my relationships and who I am right like it takes me a lot to have to ask somebody for help because I've grown up so independently like I can I can put together furniture I can do whatever like I'm very independent at like regulating my own emotions all this stuff and I don't have to ask anybody for it but that can affect my relationships in a lot of ways because then you're not

really letting anybody in on like who you are and what you're going through right it affects like relationships whether it's like friendships or like with boyfriends and whatnot too right that's so interesting I like the that's I love talking about that on my show like the effects of like whatever happened to all of us in our childhoods like how do we start to lightly see that play out right how do you think

your relationship with your dad impacted the type of relationships you pursued? So much. I mean, I went through so many bad relationships and picked so many bad guys because...

What I think is I was so like I've gone through a lot of therapy, but like obviously like still like I still think like it's good to go through therapy and to talk about these things. And I'm learning so much more every day about like what my past means to me now. But what I think is that I'm so addicted to someone who doesn't give me everything because I've been so used to working for things in my life, working for love and affection, working for success that like

I like guys who don't give me everything all at once because I've been so used to, like, to that environment. And I've also been really used to, like, this fight or flight, like, feeling since, like, growing up because, like, the way that I grew up was so... There was a lot of aggression there and it was just, like, I had to deal with all the fighting and then go to school and, like, forget about it or try to and whatever. So it was a lot of, like, pushing things back. And I think that in my relationships, I think that I...

really went towards people who gave me that fight or flight feeling again, like people who would like give it to me, but like take it back. And then like that toxicity, you know? Oh girl, you're in therapy. I'm like, oh, you just like literally spit out exactly what you're, oh, you're like at that point where you're like, oh, let me just tell you exactly my self-diagnosis, but really it's from your therapist. You're like, let me tell you what I've learned. No, it's, it's fascinating. I appreciate you sharing that because I think

to like, I don't know, the past few years, like it would have been like taboo to even like acknowledge like how our parents fucked us up. And even when people have perfect parents, kids are still fucked up somehow from whatever. Exactly. So I think that is really like you're very self-aware in those patterns. Yeah. What led you to The Bachelor? Like,

Like, how are we signing up? How did we get there? Yeah. And, like, did you have any, like, social media presence prior to that? Yeah. So I did. So funny enough, like, I don't want to give credit to my ex, the toxic ex. But, like, we were in that toxic relationship and then it got out of it and I was at a place in my life where I was in PA school and I just needed an outlet. Okay.

and I was like I've always been just like creative and and like have liked vlogging I guess like I don't know I've always like you know like wanted to be like a YouTuber at the age of 12 but I never did you know so we would have been friends okay Dan we would have been friends so then I took to TikTok and I started talking about like my PA school stuff and my everyday life because I knew there was a market for it and nobody really knows what a PA does so I was like this is great I can talk about my PA school life and have this creative outlet that I wanted aside from school and then

somebody came across my TikTok and DM'd me and was like I'm a casting producer for The Bachelor like I really like your TikToks like would you want to like interview for it and at the time I was like this is a joke I was gonna say did you think it was fake I think it was like spam I was like what's going on I was just kind of like just like no way and I but I was like

this is intriguing. Like I would maybe do an interview and see where it goes. But like I'm in school, I would never actually do this nor would my school actually ever let me do this. So I did the interviews, whatever. And it came to a point where they were like sending me contracts and they were like, can you please sign like and do this like whatever? And I was like,

oh, I just don't know. And I don't know, I got into like a kind of a bad boating accident with my friends. And it sounds dramatic because I almost did die. But like, I hate talking about it because I'm like, everybody was fine. But there was a boat that basically rammed into us. And this was like a week before I was supposed to go on the show. And I was like, well, I almost died. So I'm going to do it. So I called my school and I was like, hey, I have this opportunity. Hold on. That's literally the headline. I know. Jen O'Malley.

dies prior to bachelor she made it we're here what literally was insane like I was on a boat with my friends and like this car this boat was coming right at us didn't see us and I was sitting in the exact place where the boat would have decapitated me and thank god I was paying attention because I jumped to the other side of the boat so quickly and we got into a crash like whatever but like everybody's fine after that like thank god but they were going Miami this was in the in the keys yeah yeah but it was really that moment where I was like

I almost just died and I have nothing to like say for this. Like I like I haven't been loved. Like I'm like single and lonely and I'm in PA school and my entire life has been towards school and like I need to do something for myself. I'm so sorry.

obsessed with you you're like I almost died almost got decapitated then I realized like fuck it let's go on The Bachelor let's just do it I'm obsessed yeah okay so you officially agree yeah and you get there and were you like even comprehending what was about to happen in your life

No. God, no. I had no idea. And I don't think I really understood because I was so like, I'm here for love. Like, it really is just like a weird way to find love, but it's what I wanted. So I wasn't comprehending everything that would come after that. This episode is brought to you by Aerie. Daddy gang, we all love getting comfy in our oversized sweats. If there's one thing you know about me, it is that. And that is one of the many reasons why all the love goes to you.

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This episode is brought to you by Experian. Daddy gang, there's so much good TV these days, but the good shows are on all different streaming platforms. Who needs that many subscriptions? Okay, I'm constantly like, Matt, which show is it on? I forget which one.

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I'm gonna play a little game with you okay because now that you are the bachelorette I am so curious like when we're giving out roses and when we're not giving out roses okay so first of all let's take a sip of our drink we never we've just been crazy this looks like water to anyone watching but I swear there's tequila there's definitely okay

Oh, that's actually not bad. We could have used ice, but my ice machine is broken. Cheap fuck over here. Sorry, Jen. It's okay. Literally, I go to get you ice and you're like, oh, we have no ice in my studio. I can't believe this establishment is in my house. Literally, what is this establishment? Call her out. He's going downhill. Okay, I'm going to give you a scenario and you're going to tell me if this person would get a rose from you. Oh. Are you ready? Okay. Okay. He has a girl best friend. Oh, my God.

That's tough. That's tough. You see, it depends how long has he been best friends with her? Is this recent? Is she hot? Has he tried to sleep with her before? That's the thing. Has he tried to sleep with her before? And how do you ask a guy that? I think I would just ask. You would just say what? I'm the kind of person that would just ask. Okay, pretend I'm him. My name is Kyle. Kyle, have you tried to sleep with her before? No.

You're just being that direct. Or have you fucked her before? Oh, perfect. That's the question. We're just going right in it. Yeah. And if he's like, no, no, no, we've just been like friends for a long time. We met through this and like we're just friends. Okay. Interesting. Okay. I would maybe give you a rose. I think I'd give you a rose for the meantime. But if the story I would be curious to see if the story continues to check out. I agree. Here's the thing. Is it fucked up to say like I would consider myself a pretty confident person, but I'm

I obviously get jealous. Right. I agree with you. Like if my partner had a girl best friend that was like clearly his type. Yeah. I'd be like or if she's like yeah is that fucked up to be like if she's really hot. You're like what are you two talking about over dinner every night. Exactly. Right. Are you going to just the two of you. Why are you doing that. Here's the thing. I'm I'm also like pretty like secure myself at this point too. And I think that it would really depend on like

Like, if we just start meeting... Like, if we just met and you have a girl best friend, fine. But, like, at some point, like...

I should be your girl best friend. Not to be like, not to be clingy, but like I should be the priority. I should be the girl best friend. I agree. I feel like there's a lot of different like ways you can look at if your boyfriend has a girl best friend or your fiance or your husband. I think there's like a lot of questions you do need to ask because it's like, if it's like they're friends, but like because he's his, it's his best friend's girlfriend. You know what I mean? Like amazing. Yeah. But if this is just like a simple,

single hottie just thriving in the corner and you're just like why are you guys going to dinner by yourself odd I agree I agree and it's funny because back in the day I'd be like I'm the cool girl I don't need to ask these questions but no you have to ask the questions and it doesn't make you crazy it makes you smart thank you because like love all of my men in my life I've won what I'm my husband love men that have been in my life but like I'm sorry but like

I just have a hard time if there's no connection to the friend group. If there's no connection to like childhood, we've known each other because our moms were best friends and we were born in the same whatever. Right. You just met her out and now she's your best friend. Red flag. Yeah. Huge red flag. Okay. He is outdoorsy and his ideal vacation is camping. Yeah.

Like glamping, maybe, perhaps. No glamping, Jen. Camping. Like sticks together, fire burning, like sleeping on the nature ground. We're going on hikes. We're seeing the bears. We're putting up the tent. You know what? I could do it. I could do it. I am a nature gal. Okay. Um.

I do prefer to glamp than camp. But if you know, if I trust him and he's someone that I can trust to build a fire and attack the bears, if the bears attack, like, sure, I could do it. I don't want to be doing it every day. I'm obsessed. You're like glamping. I had Wiz Khalifa on like months ago. And I was like, what about like camping? And he's like, the fuck?

fuck is that he's like you know what I'm like in my RV with like my plasma TV I'm like hold on where does the TV come into play with camping Wiz and he's like that's how I would camp yeah that's how I would camp so you're on kind of the same page as Wiz Khalifa yes you want a little glamp me and Wiz could go glamping together okay okay would you consider yourself high maintenance oh no I I don't but there are things I'm picky about for sure okay like um

I don't know like curling my hair like I want to make sure my hair is curled all the time like I don't like having straight hair we can't do that in the woods and that's why I would never I would need to go glamping with an RV and the plasma tv and whiz and then an outlet for my hair curler exactly all these things have to perfectly align so that you would go to the woods and specifically Wiz Khalifa has to be there yeah specifically yes okay he's a mama's boy

Oh, gosh. Like how bad of a mama sport. Like he's calling her for everything, every second, every day. Yep. You're not getting a rose for me. I can't do it. I just can't. I love someone who has a good relationship with their mom. But there's got to be a time where you fly the nest, you know. And at this age, at my old age, if my man is 26, 28, 29, 30 and still calling his mom, he's got to go. Yeah. It gets a little like.

It gets a little sus when it's like, why do you keep calling mommy? And like, I've had guys that like call mommy after our sex. And I'm like, I just don't know. Like immediately after. Yeah, pretty much like laying back. He pumped and dumped and then he was like, hi, mom. That's what I knew. I was like, I think I'm like really missing something here. Like something feels off and like I don't want to be a part of this. Okay, how quickly do you introduce someone you're seeing to your family? I usually don't. Like I've never introduced anyone to my family before.

Because my family can be very judgmental. Okay. And they're very critical. So I think I, you know, wouldn't want to introduce anyone until I felt like it was the right person, right? I'm assuming, obviously, you had to introduce people in this season to your family. Were you proud of your family? Well, I'm so proud of my family. Do they behave? I'm so proud of them. They were exactly themselves. Okay.

I was like, are they going to be shy? Nope. They were not shy. No, they were not shy. They spoke their feelings. No filters. So yeah, it was a good time. Were you anxious at all at one point being like, can you guys stop? Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, God, am I saying too much? I don't even know. No, no, I think that's fair. I think that's fair. I think that's fair, too. Yeah, I mean, they are not afraid to speak their mind. Yeah. And, I mean, why would they be, you know? Yeah. So, yeah, I was anxious at some points, for sure. I always thought, oh, my God, if I ever went on a show like that, like,

how would my parents handle being on TV? Like, how was your family on TV? Like, were they anxious? Were they asking you pointers? Like, well, so like my brother, not shy at all. He was himself, like whatever. My mom, oh, my poor little mother. She was like, actually the first, when I called her and I was like, hey, I'm the bachelorette. She was like, you're gonna have to hire a new mom because I'm not going on TV. I'm not doing it. Like, it's just not me, babe. It's not me. I'm obsessed.

I come to find out that before she came on for the episode that she was there for she was practicing lines in English for like weeks beforehand but I wanted to make her comfortable when she was there so I was like mom you can you can speak Vietnamese like it's fine because I'm bilingual like I can speak it and I I was like I think this is a beautiful moment for people to be able to really see what our family's like like I don't speak English to my mom most of the time and she was like

no, I can do it. Like I could speak English because she'd been practicing for so many weeks. So, and when I heard that, I was like, oh, I feel so bad.

I'm also crying that is the sweetest most wholesome thing that your mom is like trying to show up for you in this way and then you being so sweet back being like mom be yourself like it's okay yeah it was oh it was such a such a sad moment like because I didn't know that she'd been practicing and I was like pressuring her to just be herself and I was like oh god I didn't know but I mean it all was fine but she was very nervous like she is not the type of person that wants to be on camera like ever okay I think that's like

better can I be like honest like it kind of freaks me out when the parents are like you can tell like the mom's like looking in the camera I'm like you're looking for real housewives to pick you right up like they're like looking a little too prim and proper I'm like hold on you like they like practice their lines together I think it's more genuine if the parent is like I'm just here to support my daughter or my son and like

Wait, did she end up ever speaking Vietnamese? She did. Yeah, yeah. At one point, well, at one point I kept telling her to speak Vietnamese and she tried to and then she like forgot it and started speaking English and I've never seen this woman forget Vietnamese in her life. I was like, what is going on?

She was nervous. She was so nervous, but she eventually, like, the nerves calmed down and she was fine. Was she so proud of you? She was. Yeah, she really was. We're so proud of you. Oh, thank you. Okay, his ideal weekend is going to the club and partying. Mm-mm.

you're not gonna roast me at this age we're too we're too old for that okay so you're not down for the parties over the weekend i am sometimes but the fact that i live in miami it's like when i first moved there i was doing it every weekend and i was like this is not a sustainable lifestyle especially in school so i had to really limit myself and now i really only like go out when like friends are visiting like people are down there and like they want to have a good time like i'll go and celebrate and whatever or like it's a birthday um but to do it every weekend i cannot do

that god no I'm too old I'm far too old okay if he was on this season and he was often in the middle of drama is he getting a rose drama can go a lot of different ways oh so it's like why are you in the middle of the drama like do you start it are people just jealous of you or or or what is it or what is it so it depends did you feel like you had to suss out and were you good at it like

Obviously, there's always drama. But were you good? There's always in a season like someone is either being misrepresented by the group. Like, did you find yourself being good at sussing out like if they were being honest or if they were being a little shit? Yes, absolutely. I think I very much have like a gut feeling that I trust. And yeah.

there were definitely certain men that I trusted more than others. Was there drama? Yes. And did I have to suss things out for myself? Yes, I did. And I'd like to say that I, you know, my gut was right at the end of the day. Well, now that we know you dealt with Tunnel Boy, like, literally, like, you are like, I'm coming

I mean, you're like, do not fuck with me. I know a little piece of shit when I see one. Yes. Okay, we're out of the game. Now I'm just going to ask you about Bachelorette. We're moving on. Okay. You have to tell me as we're kind of talking about this, like, what was it like dating? Like, how many men? 20 something? Try to articulate that. I didn't remember all their names on night one. Yeah.

How could you? I'm not going to lie about that. Like, I really didn't. Right. It was strangely, like, the first night, it was strangely easy for me to, like, flirt because I'm a natural flirt. So I found it easy to kind of get along with everybody. Okay. And then as time went on, like...

It was very easy for me to like be in the moment with each and every single one of them, which I found surprising because I thought like if I was with one, maybe I'd be thinking of the other and vice versa and whatnot. But I very much was in the moment with each and every one of them. So it wasn't too hard. But I also feel like saying that it wasn't hard dating 25 men is like what in the hell, Jen? Actually, what's weird is you said that I actually kind of agree is like the hardest part of dating the 25 men is probably remembering all their names. Yeah.

And then I think probably when you're down to like...

seven it definitely got harder as time went on right like it was easy to compartmentalize at first because there were so many of them and like in the beginning the feelings weren't as strong right but towards the end like yeah it was a little bit more difficult when it got down to like whatever amount there was because the feelings were so much stronger okay yeah you have to tell me when you're in the first rose ceremony do you have an earpiece in like no how do you be like jimmy r

and Jimmy T and Kyle 1 and Kyle like how do you know who to call do you have to okay well I'm gonna let you in on this okay so you kind of have to like try your best to remember right but like if you need a little help like you could you could phone a friend

Okay. You can be like, can I have a minute? Yes. And then you can go back to the room and they're like, this is Jimmy R and this is Jimmy T and Jimmy T has the blonde hair done and you're like, got it. And then you're like, Jimmy T, here's the rose. And he thinks you were like thinking so hard about him. You're like, what the fuck is this guy's name? Well, it's

It's more like, I know I'm giving this one a rose. Just like, give me like the first letter and like, I will. Okay, and they may be like, beep, beep, beep. No earpiece though. No earpiece. No earpiece. It's more of like, um, um, hey. Hi. Are they? Wait, hold on. Hold on.

There's all these. No, no one can care about this on ABC if we're like, how does it work? How can you actually, do they yell? Like, I kind of leave the stand for a second. And I go, please tell me, tell me which one this is because I forget. Can you, can I say thank you? Because every time I watch, I'm literally sweating. Not if you're going to pick, I'm sweating. Cause I'm like, how are they going to remember? Like, who is that guy in the corner? I don't even know his face.

face okay okay so they're helpful otherwise I was gonna be like guy one vibe two like mustache guy like hot one kind of hot one like Jesus looking otherwise it was gonna be like that so okay have any of your exes reached out to you since the bachelor or the season of the bachelorette um since the bachelor yeah yeah yeah

Saying what? So, oh gosh, I'm really putting this on blast.

Kind of fun, though. Yeah. So there was one ex-boyfriend who – there's two. So there was this one guy that I dated, like, three years ago in Boston when I first moved there. And we dated for, like, two months very briefly. And then we were really good friends after the fact. And so we've been in touch, like, here and there. I've gone on family vacations with him before. Like, we're just, like, very – we're friends, though. You know what I mean? Okay. Maybe a little benefit here and there. Okay.

But I would never date him again just because we're just such different people and we know that certain things don't work for us. So we're good friends and that's where it's at. But yeah, I mean, after The Bachelor, I think he reached out in a more maybe like serious manner and I was like entertaining it as like a friend because hey, I like attention and whatever. Yeah.

But I knew that I was never actually going to be with him because I was like, there's just, I've been there before. I don't want to do it again. But I care about him as a friend very deeply. So there was that. And I don't, we were supposed to go. Okay. So we were supposed to go to a wedding together in Columbia, like before the bachelorette whole thing happened. And then when it happened, I was like, I can't go to this wedding because I'm going to find the love of my life. Hopefully. Right. Yeah. So he was a little disappointed. Yeah. But I get that. It's like.

revisiting something from the past it feels familiar and it can feel like oh like why not just like go to a wedding and like be dates a free trip to Colombia I was like yeah I'm single I can do whatever I want but then also knowing like in your heart like he's just

you see him as a friend yeah you're like yeah I'm gonna go and like see if I can date and find the person that I'm in love with absolutely okay who was the other one John you said too the other one was the toxic ex where we were in a relationship for a year and he reached out and sent me this whole long letter about like everything that he did wrong and I remember like for the longest time that's all I wanted from him right was like an apology I

And when I was reading it, I was like getting pissed off. I was like, this is fucked up. Like, I don't even I don't want the letter because it made me angry at the way he treated me and that it took him this long to apologize. And I was kind of like, what the fuck was this for? This was for you, not for me. Like, I've healed these wounds. I don't need you to heal them for me. This is you healing yourself. So I basically liked the message and was like, good luck. Yeah.

I'm obsessed. I'm talking about that. No, Jen, I'm obsessed because I think a lot of people, it's kind of like once you lose something, sometimes people understandably like recognize the worth when they like see them with someone new. And then you're like, fuck, did I fuck up? Like, should I have left that person? I feel like for you, that must be like slightly different.

vindicating to be like now you want to reach out and apologize like now right now like after everything all this has happened and you've seen it all on tv now you want to reach out yeah okay that's kind of exactly this episode is brought to you by experian daddy gang there's so much good tv these days but the good shows are on all different streaming platforms who needs that many subscriptions okay i'm constantly like matt which show is it on i forget which one

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What is the most valuable lesson that you learned about yourself throughout this whole process? That it's okay to have a voice. In fact, it's better to have a voice. For the longest time,

I didn't stand up for myself. I didn't feel comfortable in like expressing what I need and what I want. And throughout this whole journey, I was able to really find my voice and, and like really be myself and, and let these guys know like who I am and what I want. And I wasn't just coasting by anymore because in the past I've always just been like afraid to like talk.

talk about certain things or afraid to stand up for myself because I thought that it would make someone love me less or look at me differently. But at the end of the day, it's this is who I am and I'm going to have a voice and you're going to take it or leave it. And if you leave it, you're not my person. I really appreciate you saying that because I understand like reality TV has its perks and its downfalls. But I will say I think something that The Bachelor has always done very incredibly is like

You guys are having, like, really intense conversations that there is no distractions. There is no, like... I know on some shows there's, like, drinking and partying and, like, nights... Like, this is, like, a very...

insular environment where you're having to be like let's talk about the real shit and like let's get to the crux of like who you are who I am and I think that's amazing that you're like I'm it's almost breeding an environment where you're like I have to be vulnerable yes and who do I want to be vulnerable with versus who do I maybe not feel as comfortable to open up to yeah exactly it's such a concentrated environment that it's impossible to not be vulnerable and I agree it's like in some instances like if you were vulnerable and the guy didn't handle it the right way it's like

okay well then you're not my person right so it creates like certain moments like that where you're able to really get to the nitty gritty of what a real relationship would be like because it's so fast tracked I also just think about that whenever it starts to get down to the wire it's like when you have like eight guys left let's say six guys left

How are you because like you have a timeline. Yeah. Like you can't just like be like dilly dallying and like until you you kind of have it's like the rose ceremony is now you have to decide. Yeah. How in moments where you were like maybe a little torn on like who to send home. Like what were those like deciding factors of how you knew how to like OK I'm going to let this one go over this one if you were like ever torn.

I think at the end of the day, it really went down to like, could I see a life with this person? So if they had said something in the past that like really was a red flag for me or really just like didn't work with what I wanted in my future, like, but I still had fun with them. I knew in my gut, I was like, I have to let them go because this one thing is not going to work and it's something that we won't be able to work through. So yeah, were there times where it went down to the wire where I was like, oh, I don't know. But then I did know if I really thought about it, I was like,

This works right now, but it's not going to work forever. Right? Yeah. Are you happy with the way that this season ended?

I think that the way everything like played out was exactly the way that it was supposed to. And the ending was the right ending for me. So I'm happy. Yes, for me, because everything was the way that it was supposed to go. Do you think people are going to be shocked by the ending? Or is this like a like people are going to be like, OK, we like saw this coming. This is good. Or is it like any like are people going to be uneasy of like, oh, my God, wait, what is happening? OK. OK.

Oh, God. Don't tell me to think about my words. I'm like, are you engaged? Well, because I don't think that I really saw the way it ended. Like, I don't think I saw the ending the way it was supposed to end, like, for a while. You know what I mean? Like, I don't think I saw... I don't think that I knew how it was going to end, right? Okay. You go into it thinking that it's going to be a certain way, and...

I think that I really surprised myself in the end. So I'm happy. But yeah, I think people will be shocked for sure. Okay. Fantasy sweets. Hi, this is Call Her Daddy. I've been waiting for this. How much do you like in your brain like

to allow that to affect your decision. Like for you, everyone's different. I know like some people were like, oh my God, if you slept with everyone, then I'll kill you and I can't be with you. Or some people like intimacy is a big part. Like how did you in your brain like approach fantasy suites? Cause that's like a big thing. I would be lying if I didn't say it was a concern. Like obviously I'm thinking in the back of my head, like how is this going to affect each individual relationship? Right. Yeah.

But at the end of the day, I needed to do what was right for the individual relationship. Like, I couldn't think about the other guys that were there because that would be doing a disservice to myself. And at the end of the day, I thought to myself, like, anyone who didn't understand the position that I was in and had a problem with that, that's on them. And then they weren't my person at the end of it all. But what I really approached the fantasy suites with is, like, that was kind of the time to really talk about, like –

finances like religion I freaking I don't know who did you vote for like all that kind of stuff that like you're you can't really talk about like on camera because they don't you know they don't care about that kind of stuff you know I'm obsessed with you like before you take your shirt off yeah you just let me know who you voted for in the last election just really quickly um

Um, I'm upset because these are the things you need to know before you like potentially commit the rest of your life with somebody. No, it's a great point. It's like you guys are having all of like the emotional and like romantic conversations. But now let's get down to like if we leave here. Right.

how's this gonna go are you gonna move to where i move are you uh do you are you open to practicing the religion that i want to practice like all these little things that like that matter right hugely yeah do you have like in your head like you know who's gonna be that villain that was just a little piece oh shit oh yeah please i called it out from day one do you think you know who could like potentially be the next bachelor

I think I do. Wow. I think I do. I don't know what I'm supposed to say, but I think I do. Yeah. You think you've got it. I think I do. I don't know if I'm right, but of course I think I do. I think like there's a lot of great guys on the season, but I do think one stands out in particular that I think could be, yeah, great, great for somebody, but not for me. Perfect. Yeah. Okay. Last question. What do you want people to know about you before tuning into this season? I think I want people to know that I'm a very dynamic person and

and that you can't judge me based off based off of one line that I say or one scene that you see or one interview that I had because I have a lot of different layers to me like any other human being here and I think oftentimes people are are like quick to judge on the internet because they see one thing one snippet one whatever and I think that I have a lot of different layers to me and also for the season I think that um

There's a lot of growth there. And so I definitely went on like a little self journey. Yeah. Jen, I'm so excited for you. I'm so happy I got to sit down with you. You are. You were amazing, obviously, on The Bachelor, but like getting to be with you for an hour plus like you're a lovely person. And I'm so happy no matter what the outcome. I can tell you're happy of whatever we're about to watch on this season. Like, yeah.

I know I will be tuning in. I'm very excited for you. And like, it just made me even want to watch more now, like getting to know you and also like knowing about your past and all these little shits. It's like, goodbye. Jen's about to find her man. Okay. Leave us alone. We're moving on. Or is she going to fall into the same old habits? Jen!

Oh my God. Thank you so much for coming on. This was so fun. Thank you so much for having me. Oh my God. I'm going to be screaming at my TV when you're like going on the date with like the douche. I'm like, Jess! You'll have to text me. I can't wait to hear it all. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.