My Boyfriend Travis: Thursday, September 12th, 2024
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Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the Chose and happy Thursday. Congrats on making it to the latter half of the week. Hey, Jax. This week is slowly chugging along, don't you find? I want to say something crazy. Like it's back to being long weeks, long days. This week is giving perfection. It just is. Oh, really? It's zooming by for you? The rate in which the days, like the...

R.P.P. Rate per passage, the rate in which the days are going by. Like, it feels so fair that today's Thursday. I don't feel like it's too fast, too slow. Like, every day has come and gone in an orderly fashion, and I'd like to thank the universe and God for making it that way. Not too fast, not too slow. Look at you, Goldilocks. No, I mean, obviously, like, fast is great, but, like, I have felt at the end of each day, like, tired, not overtired, like, productive. Appropriately tired. It

It's just, I think, if I have to live in a world in which there's a five-day work week, if they all could be like this, you know what? It's giving gratitude. I'm feeling like, okay. That's so great. The good news is...

is that technically they all are like this. They're not. Like, stop. I know. I know you like to say all weeks are the same length. They're literally not. It's that tic-tac sound. Are all marathons the same length? I fear that's common knowledge. Like, it is, but they're not. Because I'm sure you could run a marathon that, like, you killed it, and then there was a marathon that, seriously? Yeah, no. You couldn't even do half. Then there's extenuating factors. And you have to factor in the factors. Yeah.

I think that's kind of the whole point of factors. So that they should be factored. I am doing an experiment on today's show. I've just kind of like had enough of being actually crippled at the end of this show from sitting on my like chair too hard. I am sitting on a hemorrhoid pillow. Okay.

Now, I don't want to start any rumors. I don't have a hemorrhoid. I just thought the pillow might benefit me. Have you not tried that before? Because I see two pillows in my studio that I was like, why is there a silk gargi-pargi pillowcase in my studio? And then I remember, like, you were sitting on it because we were having tushy problems. No, that wasn't me. I never sat on a silk pillow. That's counterintuitive. You'd slide right off. And I also then have a...

What's it called? Like a Euro sham. Yeah, the Euro sham was me, but for my back, not for my ass. Okay, okay. I'm just saying. I wish you luck. Please let me know how this experiment fares because I too could use a little help in the tush department. The pillow in the description like said good for people who sit a lot, which is literally me. Not even just in this job, but in this life. Yeah. Yeah.

So we'll say. Let us know. Keep us posted. If my spirits like feel like they're even, I feel like sometimes during the show, I dwindle, you know, by the end of the show, I'm like, I have nothing left to give. If I don't get up and move, like my back will break.

I feel like, let's see how my stamina is today. Just our butts have gotten to such a bad place that like it's actually unsustainable. Like what's going to happen if we don't make a change? We can't keep living in this sort of pain. Like soon we're going to be podcasting on like, you know, people have like- From the hospital. People have like treadmill desks where they're like walking and working. Ergonomic. We're going to need like a standing desk. I mean-

Like I don't want to get to that place. I don't want to get to that place. I love sitting. And the fact that my body, my body is rejecting sitting. That's not going to work for me. Sitting is one of my favorite hobbies. That would be so crazy if we stood for the entire show. The shows would then just become shorter and nobody wants that. But like we want to sit down. We'd be tired. We'd be like, all right, let's wrap this up. Yeah. I'm just saying like it's not sustainable. The pain that we're feeling. Speaking of pain.

And sustainability. The VMAs were on last night. We have so much to discuss in today's episode, but also like lots of other news as well. Yes, lots of other news, but lots of VMAs recap because I watched the majority of it, I think. And I have so many thoughts. I want to say, I feel like in VMAs past, I have really felt like super old and really not like I knew...

I'm like, who are these people? And I was happy for the VMAs that it seemed like a lot of big people showed up. It was like a big night. I feel like all the subs were like, oh, are you going to the VMAs? Like it was probably because Taylor was there, but there were a lot of like good names and I felt like it wasn't like loser con. Agreed. It was cool con and as akin to VMAs of yore as it possibly could be.

agreed a thousand percent it was like I was impressed I feel we've said this a lot like there's so many award shows and it's like the pop girlies have sort of this unwritten rule where like one big star goes to every single one and never the twain shall meet and you know with the bill boyd music american music people's choice ladies choice men choice like there are enough to go around yeah but if

But it felt like everybody who was in town available and promoting stuff decided to show up. There was like multiple stars and I loved it. Yeah, I really liked it too. And a lot of the artists were people that I've probably, that I've heard of, but don't know, like Chapel Roan, for example. So I was really excited to like evaluate all the artists and I wanted to watch until Chapel Roan, like to really see what she's about. And it was really nice to see. And I just want to say overall, my thoughts are incredibly positive about the show. Like I really enjoyed it.

Yeah, and I think obviously Taylor being there makes it so legitimate, right?

But it being like. Katy Perry too. But it being Chapel Roan's like first televised performance, like when there's been so much like hoopla, it was also a big deal. I feel like the VMAs kind of crushed it. They did. And I don't think I've said that in many years. But I also, I think like there's this moment right now for the pop music girlies like that we haven't had in maybe 10 years, like not since the days of like when Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj, like everyone was like doing the most. And I feel like it was like,

They've been doing it for the last 10 years, but now you have this crop of new talent. And there are so many big girlies that you could just see are at the beginnings of very illustrious careers. Like Sabrina, like Chapman, but also like Olivia Rodrigo. There are just a lot of up-and-coming artists. She wasn't there, was she? No, no, no. I'm just saying in the music landscape in general. Yes. So you...

It had that same energy of like, oh, what's Lady Gaga's wearing a meat dress? Like, Chaparral was doing a medieval crossbow thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it was exciting for sure. Yeah. And there's a lot of like talent who also, they still need shows like the VMAs. So it was like good for them, good for the viewers. And just reminded me of those times. Tate McRae. Tate McRae. There were also a lot of dynamics at play. I was really shook to see Sabrina Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendes all in one building. And I...

Then it got me thinking about Shawn Mendes. I feel it's very crazy what happened to Shawn Mendes. Is Shawn Mendes still famous? I know he's famous, but does he work? He was singing his song last night. Was he? Oh, I missed his performance. He performed. Yeah, he was giving John Mayer. I was mostly on my phone. It wasn't for me, but he was...

He had a song in his heart. There was just like a time where like everything Shawn Mendes did made news and musically, personally. And now I just feel that's no longer the case. And of course, that's not a sustainable level of fame for anyone. I just feel like Shawn Mendes is...

I'm going to say it like kind of in his flop era. I feel like you think about Shawn Mendes more than the average person because I don't like think about him. I don't worry about him. I feel like if Shawn Mendes is not in the news, it's because Shawn Mendes don't want to be in the news. So like, I feel like whatever Shawn wants, Shawn does.

Okay, this is like a theory I have about Shawn. You're right. Maybe I do think about Shawn more than the average. And a lot of it was inspired by probably one of the worst documentaries ever put out. Please don't get me started on his Netflix documentary. I feel like Shawn Mendes got to a really toxic place with fame, right? It happened really quickly from Vine. And it was that type of fame where like it was lust from teenage girls. And it was just, I think maybe he didn't like it and he became like a little diva. Like, I don't want fame. And so like the fame went away. And now he's like, wait, come back. Okay. That's what I think. Okay.

I have no thoughts because I don't think about him so much. Because you're average. Yes, in my consumption of Shawn Mendes. I think I'm below average, actually. I think so, too. And I'm okay with that. Like, I didn't think for one second, I can't believe Shawn, Camila, and Sabrina are there. Oh, well, that's crazy that you didn't even think that. Sabrina and Shawn were fake.

But they weren't. Did you listen to the album? Like, they, like, he literally ghosted her and then went back to Camila Cabello in Palm Springs. Remember that picture that, like, was never really explained to us? Like, they had been broken up for a while. He had recently been seen with Sabrina Carpenter. Next thing you know, he's at Coachella with his hands around Camila Cabello. Well, it turns out we had the same experience with that photo that Sabrina Carpenter did because she literally thought they were dating. Yeah.

Sabrina is just so moved on. I feel like the way she feels about her past is the way she feels about her old music. I'm sorry, it's not mine. Don't expect me to talk about it. That's a different girl. She's such a star. She is. She was incredible last night. So we'll save the VMAs recap. That's our first story. So we'll save all of our thoughts for that if we possibly can. It's going to be a chunky review. There was a lot to unpack. Yeah. Performances, wardrobe, awards, Katie, Carrie. Yeah.

Katy Perry. It was a big night for big Katy. You just said, yeah. Like, tell me what movie this is. Yeah. Luckily. Legally Blonde. Cool. Duh. Duh. Okay, wait. I saw a game on TikTok that I think we should play. Okay. My favorite words. Who uttered those immortal words? Literally me.

So I'm going to take my headphones. We're going to decide on a movie. I'm going to take my headphones off and you're going to give like a quote to the audience, like a classic like movie quote from this movie that you know that I can think of. And then I'll put my headphones back on and try to guess the quote that you guessed. Okay.

So we're coming up with the movie together? Yeah, like let's do an easy one to start. Mean Girls, okay? Okay. I'm going to take my headphones off. You like give a quote, like a classic us quote, and I'm going to see if we think of the same one, okay? Okay. I just did the first quote that popped into my head, which is, you can go shave your back now. Bye, Jason. Okay, I'm done.

Well, she heard me say okay. I thought I knew, but I feel like you took like a long time to say it. And the one I have is a little bit shorter, but I'm going to say it anyway. Okay. You can go shave your back now. Bye, Jason. That was it. No way! Yeah. Okay. Now, let's do the same one, but you take your headphones off. What movie should we do next? The Glass House. I literally don't even know a single word from that movie. It's a joke. What's like a classic Stine movie? We could do like Legally Blonde. Let's do Clueless. Okay.

Okay. Wait, let me think. What's like a... How will I know when to come? I totally paused. That's not a good one. She's not going to get it. You're good.

Honestly, I felt really like under the gun. I'm like embarrassed of the quote that I chose. Like, I don't know. Like, I'm sorry. I'm going with you're a virgin who can't drive. No. What? I totally paused. That's what I chose. Fun game, right? Yeah, super fun. It's more fun when you get it right. Should we do one more? Fine. Okay, what's the movie we should choose? Sleepover. Okay. But I need a moment. Oh.

Julie Corky. Okay, wait. Ready? No, no, no. I didn't say it. Okay. Julie. I don't want to hear it. Julie Corky. Okay. Are we good? We're good. Julie. Julie Corky. Yes, of course. Why does it take you so long to say three words? Because I'm all, I was like, I'm talking to the people. Oh, you're hosting a podcast. Like a solo podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the first time I said it, I was laughing too much. So I needed to say it again. Yeah. Julie. Julie Corky.

- Obsessed. - Okay, fun game. Should we just dive in? I feel like we're playing stupid games so as not to talk about the VMAs when it's what we need to talk about. - When it's what we need to talk about. So now without further-- - 'Cause I have three words to say. - VMA? - My Boyfriend Travis. - The Very Meghan Awards? - The Very Meghan Awards. - No, I think it was the Voluptuous Meghan Awards. That's what she said. - Honestly, she's a queen.

Now, without further ado, do you not agree that she's a queen? Like, why did you just like, can we get into the recap? OK, OK, OK. Start going down this path like, yeah. Why don't you yell at me? Why don't you yell at me? You yelled at me. Do you not agree? Why don't you yell at me about it? I thought she was a really great host. Me too. Further thoughts coming after the break. Without further ado, here are the Fast Side Stories that you need to know.

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after. It's been a huge resource for me in supplements, good healthy snacks, but I really love their line of protein shakes. The individual bottles just are so easy. I always have them in the studio. I always have them at my house just to be like on the go prepared, you know, never getting too hungry. Thank you, Claudia. Our first story, as stated, 2024 VMAs took place last night in New York. The stars were out.

I also love that the VMAs are always in New York. Like, thank you. Yeah. Taylor Swift, Megan Thee Stallion, Chapel Roan, Sabrina, Katy Perry. Let's talk about, should we start with performances, awards or outfits? Outfits.

Outfits. We'll go like in order of how it happened. So let's start with Taylor's outfit. She was the woman of the night, and I think her outfit was most discussed of the evening. It was a departure. A Dior plaid number. I thought she looked great overall, head to toe, overall.

I thought she looked really good. Like the dress, it's probably not what I would have picked off the rack for her, but I thought she crushed it. I thought her hair and makeup looked like so beautiful and all together. I really liked it. I know a lot of people didn't.

one thing about Taylor she's never gonna wear the thing that we would have chosen off the rack for her like the obvious choice is like one of my favorite Instagram accounts you belong in this is like always putting Taylor in like styling Taylor with like what's the hottest fashion things going on and she's never gonna be like the obvious like fashionista she's always gonna do her own thing she has a real sense of personal style which I like and while I again would not have picked this I agree with you overall it was a look I think people were initially like what the fuck but

But it's important to remember the VMAs is not the Oscars and it's not the Grammys. It's meant to be fun. Like when you think about the meat dress, right? That was at the VMAs. Or like Britney and Justin all denim look. That was at the VMAs. The VMAs is kind of like circusy in its outfits. There's really no dress code and people always do the most wacky things that they would never do on like a red carpet for the Grammys or something a little bit more sophisticated. So keeping that in mind,

It's not my favorite look she's ever done. It's my favorite glam she's ever done. And so many people are like, oh man, she's had work done. And the lack of critical thinking really bothers me. Like Taylor was at the US Open not three days ago looking like her regular self. Nobody said at the US Open, what do you think? She got a facelift in three days? Like please. She just had like maybe a new makeup artist or a totally new makeup look, but a little bit more glam than she usually does. She usually does very soft romantic looks.

she had like contour smoky eye like her jawline was contoured her makeup was so sick yeah and I loved the hair it looked good throughout the night the hair and makeup and she changed into two more outfits she wore a shorter dress during some more of the ceremony and then she had an after party look and I thought I really liked all three I liked the three of them together and like I liked this look better than her Grammys look I think she looks better than she did at the Grammys what was the Grammys look that like

When she announced TTPD, it was like white. White. Yeah, I didn't like that one. But then when she came out with the music video and you saw like it was, she was literally wearing the TTPD aesthetic. So it served a purpose. Now, I think a lot of her outfits serve purposes. Like when she, before she announced Midnight's, I think it was at the VMAs when she wore that blue dress with stars. It looked, it was literally midnight, you know? So what is she telling us here? Is she...

Going to the Highland Fling. Is she wearing Tefillin and going to convert to Judaism? I would love, would welcome her with open arms. I also thought like she looked like a gamer. I know it sounds crazy, but she looked like a character in Fortnite. That's how like the girls in gamers like dress. Maybe she's doing a big Fortnite concert. That's like a thing. Yeah, I do think there's probably a message here because it's a choice. And only time will tell. It's a choice and it's such a departure. Like it's so different. Yeah, but I just want to say I think she looks great.

Okay, let's just actually go artist by artist. I think that would be easier. Next we have Sabrina. No, no. I mean like as a whole. Oh, her evening as a whole. Okay. Right. She won a bunch of awards. No surprise. Like when you're the most famous person to show up in an award show. VMAs is that type of award show where I do believe it's fan voted and Taylor probably won with the fans. Because she has the most fans. But it's not like, I don't believe it's a really truly merit based thing.

Yeah, like, Fortnite won Song of the Summer. It was not Song of the Summer. It won Collab of the Year with Post Malone. I think we could say it was that. Right. But so, like, I think there's a prearrangement. Like, you want me to come to your silly little award show? Give me all the awards. Because then Taylor continues her reign as, like, the most awarded female artist of all time. That includes the VMAs. So not that Fortnite is a bad song at all. But it wasn't the Song of the Summer. But happy for her. The more times she got on stage, the more opportunities she had to talk. So that works for me. Yeah.

And I think we all knew she was going to do her vote.org. But what we weren't expecting was my boyfriend, Travis. I didn't see her second speech in full. I only saw the first one live with Post Malone. She talked about 9-11 and then also just like working with Posty and how... I really appreciated the 9-11 call out because like in New York...

9-11 like I maybe I'm unique I feel like it's grossly under discussed yeah because like young young people these days like it's like something that happened in history to them it's not yeah really we experienced it so I really appreciated her talking about it especially given that the night was in New York like and nobody do you think it's weird that the VMAs were on 9-11

I do. And to not like commemorate it in an official capacity. I saw someone like post. Oh, actually, I'm sorry. That's not true. I heard them say, and I thought this was really cool. A lot of people in the audience, like a lot of tickets were given to like people who lost their parents in 9-11. Like a lot of, not survivor, like children of survivors. That is really sweet. So they did something. That's sweet. I'm sorry. But like when you're picking out any day on the calendar and you're like, let's do our nutty,

award show on 9-11. I just think that's a weird choice. Like, I feel like most- Well, it's a choice because, like, the event was on a Wednesday. I think some events, like people's weddings, like you have no choice. It's a Saturday or a Sunday. I'm not talking about people's weddings. I'm not talking about events in general. I'm talking about the VMAs. Yeah, when like, what's the difference between a Wednesday and a Tuesday? You know, it's not like it was a special Friday night or a Sunday night award show. Would they have the VMAs on a Veterans Day? I don't think that they should. Would they though? I don't know.

I don't know, it's definitely weird. And then like you promote it and it's like September 11th, September 11th. And it's like, try as you may, September 11th will always be September 11th. - So I think that was wrong.

And I didn't really think about it before I saw someone saying, like, the VMAs are on September 11th. What is wrong with the world? I'm like, what is wrong with the world? No, and seriously, thoughts and prayers to anyone whose birthday is on 9-11, too. Like, that's a somber day. Yeah. No, but to have a birthday on 9-11 or a wedding on, like, that doesn't, I mean, of course your birthday doesn't bother me. It's not the same. But a wedding doesn't bother me either, especially it's a weekend and you need a September week. Like, listen. Right. It is what it is. When everyone's getting married at the same time, dates are hard to come by. But there are 365 days in the year the VMAs could have picked on.

There are probably only a handful of that are off limits. Yeah, no, it's weird. So Taylor saying something like Queen, like Queen. Yeah, and then she was also talking about how posty is such a gentleman, how there's a reason why he's the most collaborated artist within music and everyone wants to work with him because he's just that guy, which I could see that.

And in the second award that she won for Fortnite, everybody came up with her again. And she was talking about how while they had the best time on set, there was like someone in the corner who was just like so joyous and like clapping between every take and just like shouting between every take. And that person was my boyfriend, Travis. Yeah. And the way people screamed, I don't know who, if I thought she was going to say Travis, but I certainly didn't think she was going to say was my boyfriend, Travis. She like made it a thing. Not to take away from the moment, but they're not engaged.

Okay, so I thought, like, the way that she labeled it, I was like, oh, because she should have just said it was Travis. Like, we know it's your boyfriend. So my boyfriend, Travis, I could study. Okay, so literally it's giving... Oh, no, the thing is, she is, like, such a romantic. She's always going to be that girl, like, in high school who's just, like, wanted... Her boyfriend is, like, the star football player. Like, I'm calling him my boyfriend at every chance. Okay, but... And I need to explain this to people because I'm about... Like, we need to be Rashi on this, okay? So...

the Bible, the Old Testament, the Chumash, the Torah, there are like famous rabbis who give commentary on the way that the Bible was written. And like, you'll read a sentence in the Bible and it's literally just a sentence, right? No, but Rashi will come in with this little commentary. And it's like, the way they use like this letter instead of that letter, you're not understanding it. And you know, we understand the Bible like 30 times more deeply because of Rashi.

And there are other, they're interpreters. Interpreters. Like there are a lot, but Rashi's the one. He's the main one. Yeah. He's cited the most. What Rashi could do with my boyfriend, Travis. What do you think she's saying? I think maybe she's saying I'm not engaged. Cause like, that's a rumor. I think, yes, she wants everyone to know she has a boyfriend. Like literally me when I got a boyfriend, even though like, it's not like she's ever had one, but like she has the best one.

I think she's really grateful for these fan awards. I think she cares a lot about the awards, especially the ones that are voted on by fans. And her whole career and so much of her success has been because she feeds her fans and she's really grateful to her fans. She's not one of these people who like hates her fans. And so I think, you know, she was out of the house last night. She wanted to give us

She wanted to feed us. And you know what? We ate. We were fed. And so I think part of it was that, like giving these little sound bites to people like myself, like who desperately needed to hear my boyfriend Travis. I think it was layered. I think Rashi would agree. Well, I just thought it was sweet. He is so happy and clapping. She said everything that he touches turns to joy and happiness. Which is such a nice thing for someone to say about you and Rashi.

And it's just, that's a nice presence to have in your life, right? And we talked about this at the beginning of their relationship, how when you listen to her music when she was with Joe, specifically the song Peace, like, it's kind of miserable. Like, she looked at her life and her fame as this, like, negative storm cloud and how she would never be happy and she would never be at peace and she's never going to be able to find anyone. And then for her to end up in a relationship with this, like, real goofball who takes the seriousness out of everything and is so happy, it's just fabulous. Yeah.

And then also the VMAs had a Taylor cam and they had a camera on her in the audience the entire time, which... You think she knew? Yes. I think it's like right up her butt. Yeah. But like there are cameras everywhere. So like, do you think she knew that there was like a solo? I think she has to be told that. That's wrong if they don't tell her. Yeah. That you're going to be watched the entire time on a live feed on like MTV.com, which is just like, I mean, it's great for the fans, but like annoying for the human being. Of course. But I think if she didn't want it, she could have nixed it. Yeah. Yeah.

But I mean she's gonna have fun regardless but then you can't have like just one moment like it's just you're on the entire night. Yeah. But I guess that's how we get so many viral moments. And it's a working night for her like she's going to the VMAs to work like she's not just going for fun only like.

We're good. We're ready to work. So she's yeah. Viral moments of her dancing and singing along to Katy Perry. Her facial reaction to Katy Perry announcing that she's on day one of her period which was I think shocking for a lot of us. I need to react to that as well. So let's move on to Katy Perry. Oh moving on to Katy Perry. OK so Katy Perry won the Vanguard Award. She did a multi song performance and

Without Woman's World. I didn't realize that she was winning this award, that she was doing this performance. When the performance started, I was like, oh my God, this is like when she performed at the Super Bowl. Like we're about to get like a 13 minute medley. Thanks.

Katie gave everything that Katie had and she was doing the absolute most. However, like I did have to clutch my pearls at certain moments, you know? - Yeah. - I was down with most of it. The scissoring on the table and then the camera up the pussies,

Yeah, that was really crazy. That was all for me. And then again, I'm not, you know, on Satan watch around here. We discussed Claudia and I like satanic things are not like really something that we're familiar with. But like when she put those...

on her back towards the end of the performance. That's Satan. And I feel like she gets a lot of- I'm not sure. That's not my thing. She gets, like, that's, like, one of the conspiracies about, like, Katy Perry, that she's, like, sold her soul to Hollywood. Oh, is it? That's hilarious. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That she, like, didn't have success as a Christian artist and then, like, sold her soul to the devil. Oh, but she made a deal with the devil. She made a deal with the devil.

with the devil and the devil went down to katie and there's all these like demonic references in her music videos and in her work and like and yeah it's there it's like josie and the pussycats like the demon is that girl who subliminally the message is everyone parker posey is demon right yeah yeah so she's like and then katie is josie katie's like constantly feeding satan because like he gave her a career i'm obsessed and like the other what was on her back if not that

What were those balloons? I can't even pretend to understand Katy Perry's performance because, again, what we have said time and time again, Katy Perry doesn't know who she is as an artist. And I'm getting the vibe that she doesn't know who she is as a human being because to do this video of Vanguard, and I want to say I actually think she was a great choice for what the video of Vanguard represents. She really has had such an illustrious career. I mean, clown on her now, but she is and has always been that bitch, right? The music speaks for itself. I'm her biggest fan. Don't forget. I'm literally her biggest fan. She doesn't know who she is as a human being.

And so I think her doing all those different things, like the scissoring and like the old school music and then the balloons on her back, like that's her just sort of like trying to appeal to everyone. Yeah. And it's coming through for people like it really is so desperate. And I think it's very bizarre that she didn't do Woman's World. Like, are you not promoting an album like you've been doing Call Her Daddy? She did Lifetimes.

But Woman's World was like the one, right? The first. I love Lifetimes. I have not stopped listening to it. I'm not complaining. She's like running from stage to stage like a maniac, like in her alien suit. It was crazy. She's seriously not okay. And I...

Was anyone singing live last night? I'm not like a live singing watchdog either. Like I understand there's reasons why people don't sing live. I don't think it's because everybody has a bad voice or anything. And I felt like she was singing live because she was also like talking, like make some noise, whatever. How was she not out of breath at all? Well, she's probably training for some sort of like tour and she's

I didn't get the vibe that there was a lot of lip-singing last night. Like, I thought Sabrina sounded so beautiful, definitely live. Yeah, I wasn't getting... Chapel was definitely live. No, but, like, Lisa for Blackpink, I didn't know she went on her own. I think that song would have been stronger with the rest of Blackpink, but, like, I don't think she was singing.

And I don't think she was even like pretending like she was. But you know what? Like seriously, I'm performing in another country in my second language. Like I'm lip syncing too. Okay. Well, her performance was strong and it was nice to see a member of Blackpink and I didn't know that she was doing her own thing. So Katy Perry's red carpet outfit, I actually really liked. I thought like, yeah, it was a little nutty, but it's so VMA. And again, I don't know what her current brand aesthetic era she's in. So whatever. Like it's a cool, objectively cool outfit. Yeah. I thought she, she looks great right now.

like she's a beautiful woman and she looked great then. And Orlando was with her and he was a big part of her evening as well. I feel like she was just kind of like leaning on him, like, like to absorb some of like, just the feelings towards Katie. No, the thing is,

He's so well liked, I think, within people in the industry. But also he's kind of like America's sweetheart. He's a heartthrob. He's not American. He's a heartthrob. He's in these movies that people just love. Like he is kind of one of the strongest things of her brand right now. So I appreciate that she knows people like him and she just kind of uses him as a shield. Yeah, he was a human shield last night. A hundred percent. No, literally. That's hysterical, Jackie. Yeah, and...

The butterfly thing at the end when they were like passing it back and forth, he was like, didn't want to take it. I think she thought like him standing with a butterfly would be like... Heartthrob, heartthrob. She's going to ruin him. She's literally going to just straight Orlando Bloom. But we need to talk about her starting her speech off with... She just did that on day one of her period. The thing is... Okay, ready? It was shocking, of course. And in the moment, I'm like, scuse it? However...

You know what? We were just talking about like the girls at the Olympics. Like what if one of them, like they're both equally talented, but one of them is like in their luteal and the other's in the follicular. So you know what? While it was a shock to the system, I appreciated the knowledge. That's what I'm always saying. I'm only sharing about my period so you guys know. Like be impressed. We all know too much about each other.

- Yeah. - And like, I know sometimes I was hard about, I was like hard about like knowing about people's periods, even when it was like innocuous, whatever. But it was like, because I was trying to-- - Even when it was me. - I was trying to stop the tide from this. Like now do we need to know every time someone's on, like, we don't need to know. - We don't need to know. - And it didn't change how I saw her performance.

To me, she wasn't... Okay, moving on from Katie, because I want to transition. She wasn't the most obvious. She wasn't everywhere during the show. I feel like Katie was making the most and Taylor. But to me, the night, I think, was the biggest success for Sabrina Carpenter. So she's next. We have Sabrina on the red carpet wearing Bob Mackie. It is a dress that Madonna wore in 1991. It's classic...

Sabrina silhouette like she stuck to Sabrina I think people sometimes would expect or hope that the VMAs like someone does something crazy but I think she's still in this period of cementing who she is as an artist so every look is going to be like this sweetheart feminine silhouette until it's seared in your brain this is who Sabrina is that's the thing like one of my favorite things about Sabrina I feel like whenever we're talking about her at a glance I always say like she has such a

point of view, like a very specific aesthetic. And it comes through in her music. How her music sounds is also how she looks, right? Like it all is so cohesive. And I don't think a lot of artists can say that. Katy Perry certainly can't. So I love that she's hammering it. And I completely agree. The backstory of the dress, I mean, Bob Mackie, like sick. The fact that it is Madonna's, like Madonna heard that Sabrina loved her and wanted to wear one of her dresses. And without even asking, she just sent it.

And so Sabrina was like, okay, I guess I'm wearing this to the VMAs. It's also a dress that Fran Drescher wore on The Nanny, like obsessed. The history of the dress, and like I have seriously not a single issue with the dress. She looked amazing. And it tied to her performance wear because she also wore like this very corseted sweetheart neckline white outfit too. So it all, again, the brand book of Sabrina Carpenter stays cohesive. Yes, yes.

Her performance was adorable. She did a medley of a number of Sabrina songs, including Taste, Please, Please, Please, Espresso. She didn't sing Skin, which was definitely a loss for the community. But I loved her performance. She made out with an alien. She did like a little menage a trois thing with an alien and an astronaut. I felt as though that was not necessary. Yeah, that was definitely like a scandalous moment, but it was kind of like...

you know, Britney and Madonna making out. That's a classic VMAs moment. And now Sabrina is going to make out with an alien. And that's like, so Sabrina, cause don't forget like in her brand book, she's also weird. There is like that 1% quirky. Yeah.

I think her performing taste in a room with Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello, like I know you don't see that, but it was palpable to me. Like obsessed. Like one thing about Sabrina Carpenter, she doesn't give a flying fuck. And no matter how famous she gets, that doesn't change. And that's why she's such a real one. And I seriously love her. The alien thing, like again, made no sense to me. The outfit was everything. The little, the little smooch, the sealed with a kiss on her inner thigh and her back, like obsessed. Her with all the astronauts at the end. It's also because it's the moon man. I'm sorry, moon person. Oh, yeah.

The moon person Oh wait Jackie I didn't get it Now I get it No there's astronauts Everywhere because it's The moon man Okay because then I was like But you do know It's moon person now I didn't just make that up We'll get to that Don't worry

I thought that her kissing the alien and then Taylor wearing like a UFO dress. I'm like, oh, they're teasing a collab. But now I understand they're both just referencing. It was all extraterrestrial. And here's the thing. I want to say something because I'm a person like I see everyone for who they are. Like I really do. Like you are you and I respect that. I am going to say moon man. I'm holding space for two truths. Like you are you and I love you. It's a moon man. It's a moon man.

And I don't think like female artists getting a moon man are upset about it. Like, by the way, think about it. Like the Oscar is a man. The SAG award is a woman. Like it's fine. No, it's seriously fine. No, it's a moon man. I'm sorry. I'm not changing. Oh my God. Do you want to hear the funniest thing? Me and Ben were...

In a Uber, there was like traffic and we passed because there was construction and there was a sign that said manhole. And like as a joke, Ben was like, it's what about womanhole? I'm like, Ben, they literally changed it because of that. He's like, you're lying. Ben is not chronically online. Like he doesn't know the things that go on in the world. Like he's just like normal. And he was like, what if it's a womanhole? And I'm like, no, they're teaching it. I just want to say like a hole in the street being called a womanhole is offensive to me. Agreed. And like sick. Yeah.

There are going to be children that come out of my hole. There's like life that emerges, not like some dungeon. Jackie, I need to address a rumor. I need to address a rumor. It's a rumor that I unintentionally started. Yesterday on the toast, I said that I was mothering a child outside my marriage. And there are people walking this earth now who think that I made an announcement that I have a surrogate or something. That actually sounds like you're becoming a surrogate for someone.

Oh, okay. Like I would like for the tailors, you know, or they don't need it. Sorry, Brian. I got plenty of, they've got to. Yeah. I, I'm so sorry. I was making a reference to Dave Grohl statement about him fathering a child outside his marriage. That wasn't any sort of announcement. I'm so sorry to disappoint. I am not, I don't have a surrogate nor am I becoming one. Um,

Sorry. However, like if you are going to become a surrogate, a great way to announce it is to say I'm mothering a child outside of my marriage. To all toasty surrogates, let this be your calling. If you're looking for a caption like to announce to your inner circle that you have like taken on the job of surrogacy, which is such a beautiful selfless thing, like congrats to you. Feel free to use that as a caption. It's yours. Yeah. Free idea. Any other thoughts on Sabrina?

Like, I just love you so much, Sabrina. Perfection. Like, A+. It was a big night for her. Like, last year, to put it into context, last year she performed at the pre-show.

And this year she had her own medley. So even though it wasn't like her VMA debut, in a lot of ways it was, and she aced it. My favorite thing about the VMAs is that, like, they have huge talent come, but they also use it as an opportunity to promote their own talent. And they always have, like, the cast of The Jersey Shore and Teen Mom, like, hobnobbing with Taylor Swift. And I just, like, I want to thank them for that. It's not like they, oh, Taylor Swift is coming, kick Snooki out. Like, no, bitch, seat Snooki next to Taylor. Like, I love that they promote their own talent. Yeah. Yeah.

It's sweet. Next, we have Megan Thee Stallion, who wore so many looks throughout the night, kept changing into like iconic VMA, where she hosted the evening. And I think she did a really good job. She had like really great energy. She does have good energy. She has a good personality. And I also feel like she made herself a little scarce. Like with a host, you don't want to see them too much. It's like, girl, get out of here. I feel like she showed up when she needed. And I thought she did a great job. I agree. Yeah, like totally. No notes. No notes, yeah. And she looked great.

And she's funny too Like and I think All the people there Really like her too So it's not like Any weird like VMA classic Miley what's good You know I think she's It's very copacetic Yeah Camila Cabello Was there She performed I did not catch Her performance Did you I did It was really nutty Like I didn't like it Sorry Everything I was seeing Before that It looked like Camila got her shit together

You know, I loved her look on the carpet, like the very funeral-esque, like I loved it. Yeah, me too. I didn't understand the performance. And if I was there in the audience, and I know these things are made for TV, but like seriously, like she was like in this glass, she was literally in the glass house. Like, and she was like, it was, I really didn't get it. A performance that I loved was Carol Jane. Oh!

Wait, agreed. Carol G. I don't know if I've seen her perform before. I thought she was so great and fantastic and I really enjoyed her performance. I agree. Like great energy, great dancing, great vocals, like tens all around. Yeah. I need to talk about something. Hmm.

And I know like you know I'm obsessed with this dynamic between like Camilla Shawn and Sabrina. But there's also another dynamic at play as like Taylor's plus one, right? Taylor's best friend. For so many years it was Camilla. They've sat together at a million award shows and just like, you know, she's been that thing that like, that person that Taylor leaned on to like dance with and take pictures with. It's a role, it's an important role. Tree Payne has played it at many times.

Sabrina Carpenter played it. I feel like it was maybe last year. Sabrina is also now like an inner circle Taylor girl. I mean, haven't really spoken about this, but what happened to Camila Cabello and Taylor Swift? I don't know if there was like a breakup of sorts, but they definitely fizzled. Yeah, we talked about it a few weeks ago. They definitely fizzled. Now Margaret Qualley and Jack are playing the role. Also Lana Del Rey likes to sub in sometimes.

But last night I think that like Sabrina was really having her own night And so she didn't want to sit with Taylor As like Taylor's support system Which I feel like Taylor's like Yes you have your own moment Camilla didn't sit with her either I need to know like what happened there Suki is tapping into Yeah Suki's new recruit She's up at bat

Yeah, I love her. But you know what? Like it's time for it to be Travis. And I understand it's the season right now and he probably couldn't go last night for his schedule. But like they've been dating a year. He loves to party. He's a celebrity. They're out and about. He loves to dance. They do everything else together. Like it's time for it to be the man.

I agree. And she's been very wary of like not making red carpet moments ever in her career. Like moments for her, like making it about her relationship. I think she feels really strongly about that. But everything with Travis is different, right? Yeah, no, I think if this had been any other day of the week, like US Open day where he could have been in New York, I think that he would have gone with her. This would have been the perfect event for them to go together because it's so not serious. I'm sure they were actually bummed that they couldn't go together because they would have had a lot of fun.

Everyone there would have like been so into each of them. It would have been, it wouldn't have, of course it's like Taylor's domain, but like VMAs are really for all sorts of celebrities. It's not like the Grammys. If he goes to the Grammys, like he has to be buttoned up. He has to behave like he is like Mr. Taylor Swift at the Grammys. I think if she gets the nominations that she wants for TTPD, he will go with her. Yes. If the schedules align. And I think by then, like they'll be doing even more stuff publicly, but as a first one to just like have a fun date night, like this would have been perfect.

Agreed. Like dancing, singing. When I got up to the podium, I think that I forgot to say your name. And if he were in a matching plaid outfit, like that's all the evening needed. In a kilt. In a kilt.

That's what the evening needed. That's what the evening called for. There was a kilt-sized hole at the VMAs. 1,000%. Okay, next up, Chapel Roan, Chappelle Roan. What did you think? This was your first interaction. She had a little bit of a rough start to the evening because the first thing that went viral was that- She had to tell the photographer to shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. Now,

I have read a lot and I haven't seen any video proof, but it appears as though the photographer was yelling at her. And so she said, shut the fuck up. Like he provoked her. I do think that is the protocol on the red carpet. Photographers are always like left, left. And they scream. They're actually really rude. And she, you know, she loves her boundaries. And I think she's like, listen, this is my first red carpet. I'm not playing that game with you. Yeah. You want my picture? You talk respectfully. How it was, you know, the red carpet is very anxiety inducing and it was very overwhelming. And,

And she didn't like the red carpet. I could see her like one day when she's like even bigger to like skip red carpets in general and being like, this is not for me. Yeah, being one of those artists who like, I'm only here so I don't get fined. Yeah. So she performed Good Luck Babe, which is a song that is familiar to me. And I thought it was really great. I liked the medieval...

Aesthetic. Aesthetic in the background. And I was like, is she really about to shoot a fiery bow? But it all worked and it was good. She canceled like many shows in Europe for this performance. And I think her fans were really upset. But this was kind of a huge moment for her. The medieval, she has a very artistic, unique point of view. And she's going to do what she wants. For me, like I'm just more of like the fun pop girly. Like I want bright colors, not like dark, fiery things.

medieval energy. But one thing about her is her vocals are next level. And I was glad that she was able to like show everyone like I can do it all. I can do the crazy shooting about an hour, but my vocals are going to remain on point. I think it was a big mainstream moment for her because we talk about her a lot in the sense that like she feels very online. And this was huge, like televised American moment. Yes. I just want to say, I just don't feel like the vocals, I felt like the song sounded exactly like what I've heard before.

from Instagram and TikToks and whatever. And I don't feel like the chat, I understood completely like chaperone like washed over me, but not because she did a good or a bad job. It's just like, you can only get so much in a three minute performance. Yeah. I think though, when you think about people who've had their first televised moment, like we're always making excuses. Like I remember when Olivia Rodrigo blew up and then she had her first, they were like, it's her first show get better. And to really nail it your first time,

I think that's huge. I guess it's good that the song just sounded like it was playing on a soundtrack and then she's dancing in a knight's uniform. Right. I didn't get to know a lot of Chapel Rowan, but again, how much can I get to know in a short performance? And it wasn't even a medley. I was hoping for a medley. A medley would have been good. Did you like her red carpet look? I actually really liked it. Yeah. I think that she doesn't usually show so much face. I don't love the glam.

Well, so, okay, so you have to understand, like, every time she's seen live, she does, and that's why so many, in all of her speeches, she, like, acknowledges and thanks drag queens. She does drag makeup. Like, her foundation is pink, usually, or green. Like, really out there, and I think that's, like, something she does to, like, pay homage to drag, but also, like, to maintain a level of privacy. So for her to wear, like, yeah, she still wore, like, crazy makeup, but, like, it was kind of flesh-colored. That was huge. Yeah.

Interesting. Okay, so the glam's like not my favorite, but actually in looking at the outfit on its own, I do really like it. Yeah, it's very like demure. And she always goes a little bit more out there. I don't know what I should have been expecting, but I think this is actually really cool. Yeah, I agree.

Who else? I don't have anyone else really. Me neither. The awards, the ones that were televised. Oh, Eminem opened the show. Mm-hmm. LL Cool J. I just want to say I love him. Mm-hmm.

I didn't know any of the songs that he performed. I just feel like he has a really good attitude. Like, I love him. Benson Boone, I heard him performing because Zach was still watching in the living room. He sings these beautiful things. Teddy Swims performed every five minutes. I love Teddy Swims. Yeah, so that was good. You know who could have been there but wasn't there, but it would have been a year for her to be there? Don't Dess Not Ari.

Don't ask Ari. She was nominated for a lot of awards. She probably would have won if she went. I feel like she's taking the Lady Gaga path where like she's acting and she's kind of like not leaving music behind because she's still making music. But you think you're like a little like Lady Gaga would never go to the VMAs. Like she's going to the Oscars, you know? Because she's acting. Wicked. Right. Like you get like a little bit of like a superiority complex when you make a major movie. I'm cracking up. That's what I think. Okay. Well, that's the VMAs.

All in all, like, I feel like the kids are doing all right. I agree. Sometimes I watch these award shows and I'm like, you guys, like. Need help. We all need, we need to pause and we need to evaluate. Yeah. But checking in on the youth, like, the music is good. Everyone, like, it was good performances. Joyous. Everyone was looking really good. Like, put care into their outfits. The glamour was here. Yeah. I enjoyed.

I enjoyed that. The glamour was in the room with us. Yeah, yeah. I thought it was good. Jolly good show. Jolly good show. Our second story, a little more Katy Perry news. A follow-up from this week because Katy Perry reacts to her fiance Orlando Bloom being caught checking out Kim Kardashian's butt.

- I wanna say, I know you guys think that I'm a Katy Perry defender. I actually feel like it was really crazy that they asked her this question. - I thought it was crazy that they asked her when she hadn't already seen it. So Katy Perry was on the Elvis Duran Show on Tuesday, and as she's being interviewed, one of the hosts sees this photo that we talked about this week of Orlando checking out Kim's butt, and they're like, "Have you seen this?" And she's like, "No." And you can tell, when someone says, "Have you seen this?" - She's scared. - And you're like, "No." You could sense the fear taking over. - The dread. - What could it be?

Turns out this is like not nearly as bad as what something else could be. So... - The whole thing, honestly, the clip kind of gave me the ick. Like, I actually felt really bad for her. I thought that even if she had known and if she wasn't caught off guard, like seriously, I thought it was a disrespectful question. - Yeah, but one, she could have like had a prepared answer to just like nip it in the bud. And I think her answer would have probably been the same as what she said, but she could have had something like maybe even snarkier. And two, like to be live on air and someone goes, "Have you seen this?"

the blood drains from your face. It did to her too. It did. So anyways, Elvis asked, I mean, how could you not look? And then so she like looks at the picture and she goes, I approve.

Yeah, of course. And by the way, like, no matter what she said, I was never going to hold it against her because being put on the spot like that is like actually rude. But I just want to say like, my problem here isn't even that they put her on the spot. It's the fact that they asked this question in general. Like, it's fucking rude and it's disrespectful. Yeah, also... And I felt actually really bad for her watching the video. Like, try not clenching your butt cheeks watching it. Right, and then Elvis said the images captured Orlando with his hand right above Katie's butt. And then Katie said, it's been other places. Sorry to tell you. And she said, my daughter is four. Yeah, then she has to like...

go and be her unseverable self but you know what I can't even blame her oh speaking of she did mention Orlando doing the dishes um at the VMAs so one thing about Katie is like she's gonna make you cringe yeah and that like never really was her thing I guess like we didn't know that much about her she was all teenage dream she was always in costume she was always putting out music and music videos and like not to do with like her person agreed

She really needs to stop like all of it. Just release the album and go home. So there you go. We can put a bow on that. Love her. But she is also on a press tour right now. She's doing like tons of things. And so she's going to get asked about like the stuff that's going on. And that's also like the feeling when somebody's doing a lot of press, like you get over them. You get annoyed. It's like enough. Oh, yeah. Well, that too.

I'm ready for the album to come out. Like, I feel like she's done an adequate amount of press. Like, I want to tell her PR team, like, jolly good job. The job is done. Give us the work. The fact that the work isn't out yet does feel like a miscalculation. Yeah. Like, they started too soon. I have, like, clicked a couple times. I'm like, oh, the album. Let me listen to it. And, like, both times it wasn't out yet. It says, like, upcoming. And it just doesn't feel right. I need to know when it's coming out now. And, by the way, when does it come out? Right. I'm going to look. Okay.

September 20th. What's today? The 12th. We still have like over a week. Next Friday. That's a long time. Okay, a week from tomorrow. It should be tomorrow. It should be tomorrow. By the way, it should be tomorrow. Like after the VMAs. And by the way, it should have been last week so people could have saw her performance last night and then went and streamed Katy Perry. Yeah, or really today. Or tomorrow, excuse me. Yeah. Next story. Some good news, everyone.

Jon Bon Jovi stops a woman from jumping off the Nashville Bridge. I'm so ready to talk about this, but I thought it was going to be your segue into Artem and Nikki Garcia. No, I have another segue for that. Some good news. Some good news.

We're 50% there to getting John Cena and Nikki Garcia back together. But this is better news because a life has saved. No, this is really. Because Jon Bon Jovi has saved a life. He stopped a woman from jumping off a Nashville bridge in a heart-wrenching video. Jon Bon Jovi talked someone out of taking her own life in a video shared by the Metropolitan Nashville Police Department on Wednesday. The video, which was recorded on Tuesday evening and shared on YouTube, shows the singer slowly approaching a woman on the famous John Segan Halter pedestrian bridge in Nashville, Tennessee. He happened to be

filming a music video for his song people's house when he and his team noticed the woman standing on the outer ledge of the bridge and clutching on clutching onto the handrails he stopped a few feet away from the woman and began speaking to her before moving closer alongside another bystander it's unclear what was said but the singer and the other individual appear to convince the woman in distress to return to the main part of the bridge the video shows the pair helping the woman back over the railing before further speaking to her and then the trio walks off

This is really chilling. I mean, like, talk about right place, right time. And do you think she knew she was talking to Bon Jovi? For sure, right? He's, like, that famous. I wouldn't know, I don't think. Yes, you would. Actually, if they were filming a music video, like, down the road, and then the person, like, who's probably in, like, a leather jacket and sunglasses, like, comes over. Definitely in a leather jacket. It really, yeah. Like, he looks like Bon Jovi. He's in his Bon Jovi wears.

Because I feel like a thousand percent everyone knows who he is. I would not know this man. Really? Yeah. That's so crazy of you. Well, why would I? Journey? But like, I don't, why would I know what he looks like? I only know what the Glee cast looks like. I'm dead.

There aren't enough people that talk about the fact that Bono and Bon Jovi are different people, right? I think that's definitely confusing. If you weren't alive and socially conscious for the peaks of both of their careers... Yeah, it's a lot to take in. But as it pertains to this story, I want to say let's assume she knew who he was. I think it's fairly safe to say he is the biggest rock star in America. He's one of America's greatest productions. Do you think...

I can't really imagine what it's like to be in the headspace of like of that woman. But I imagine maybe she thought for a second like that she was hallucinating because you're like so close to the end. You're like talking to God. People say like they have crazy experiences. People who have been there. Like maybe she thought it was a hallucination. Like Bon Jovi's coming, you know? Maybe except for like the music video being filmed down the way. And there was like another guy too, I guess. Yes.

- I don't know, but this is so great. Also, page six notes that he has extensive training in interacting with people in crisis due to his Jon Bon Jovi soul foundation. So it really is right place, right time because, you know, who knows if he could have said the right thing or the wrong thing, but because he like is educated in this. - What's the soul foundation?

The organization's purpose is to recognize and maximize the human potential in those affected by hunger, poverty, and homelessness by offering assistance in establishing programs that provide food and affordable housing while supporting social services and job training programs. Gargi Parji. Okay, pop off, John Bovey. Bon Jo... John Bovey. Gargi Parji. It's the Gargi Parji Foundation. No way, I love him. Like, seriously, this is so sweet. And what a great end to a story that could have had a very different outcome. Yeah. Yeah.

Really a mitzvah. And the fact that it's all on video is even crazier. I mean, you can't do anything these days without being on video. Yeah. Everything, I feel like everything is recorded. Like this was probably. CCTV. Yeah. From the bridge footage. But I wonder who put it on YouTube. Maybe it was even the police department just because. I mean, these are good stories, right? These are stories that should be amplified. Yeah. Yeah.

But he's not speaking on it. And I hope that woman seriously gets the help she needs. His team said he will not be speaking on it to protect the privacy of the individual. Well, of course. And also, like, at the end of the day, the story is not about Bon Jovi. It's about this woman who's, like, having a crisis. And so let's focus on that, you know? Let's get her the help she needs, not, like, Bon Jovi. And I like that he's not being like, hey, look at me. Classic. Honestly. Classic. Mench. Mench. Menchy energy. Are you ready for our next story? If it's the next story, that's brought to you by Cetaphil. It is.

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Wash also their body wash find Dr. Tails at Walmart or any major retailer near you. Thank you Claudia. Oh, yeah, welcome I just needed to correct something from yesterday because I was saying like Dave girl has his book coming out in October because those were And his book came out October of last year last year and he hasn't posted on Instagram since so it's been you know busy impregnating women his book says like coming this October and

And it's... It's confusing. Past October. Just wanted to say. Octobers have passed. Octobers have passed.

Our next story, what Claudia thought I was going to say before, is that Nikki Garcia, nay Bella, has filed for divorce from Artem after the former Dancing with the Stars pros domestic violence arrest. So it is over between Nikki and Artem. She filed for divorce from him on Wednesday per TMZ less than two weeks after he was arrested for domestic violence. As a reminder, the exes share four-year-old son Mateo.

So obviously wishing them well, respecting their privacy, et cetera, et cetera. How long does John Cena wait before obviously leaving his wife? Six months. Because sometimes like, you know, you have to, you see an opportunity and you have to take it. I think that was when he starts like planting the seeds and like getting in fights. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that like in six months, it's not. He can claim he's unhappy. Yeah. And it doesn't just seem like I'm leaving because Nikki is free. Yeah.

Now, all jokes aside, I wish him and his wife the best, but some truths are just sort of undeniable. And I think that like this actually couldn't have worked out better in the sense that Nikki really should never have given up her wanting to have kids. No woman should write for a man. So she got a beautiful baby son. Thank God. And you know what? It didn't work out with the father. Luckily, luckily.

There is a gorgeous, successful, loving man. Remember when he went on the Today Show and was like, Nikki, come back to me. Like, seriously, not enough people talk about these two as the greatest love of our time. What if he doesn't want to be a stepdad? Oh, please. Because I think at that point when he went on the Today Show, he was so desperate. He's like, please, I'll give you a child. And she was like, no, I don't want it this way. So I think now he'd be happy being a stepfather. He said, give you my wiles, give you a child. It's not wild, it's wile. Wiles. Give you my wile, give you a child. I didn't think you're wiles.

Yeah, isn't your while like your... Maybe it's not. Hold on. Here it is. I think it's while. Oh, she's saying give you my while to give you a child. We're both wrong.

Oh, wild. I thought that's what you said. No, I said wiles. Because what are wiles? Oh, Jackie, wait. We're saying the same thing. Oh, I thought it was wiles too. Like you're womanly wiles, right? Give you my... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I don't know what wiles means, but it means like... Okay, wile means devious or cunning stratagems employed in manipulating or persuading someone to do what one wants. So you're womanly wiles are when like you use like your women...

- And by the way, that's a word Taylor Swift would 1000% use in a song. - No, I actually think it's a typo on AZ Lyricx. - Oh please, AZ Lyricx doesn't have typos. - Give you my wild, no, even Genius Lyricx is saying it. Give you my wild, give you a child. - Give you my wild, give you a child. I do think now needs to, I was thinking this on the way to work today, that because we're going to the Eros tour in almost a month, which I'm so excited about, we're not talking about it enough, we also need to start some sort of online media campaign to get her to sing.

Peace in Miami. It's not out of the question. Peace in... Are we going night one or night two? I literally don't even remember. I have no idea. Hashtag peace in Miami. Hashtag peace in the Middle East? Nah. Peace in Miami. Yeah.

I guess. Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other. Family that I chose now that I see your brother as my brother. I haven't even thought about like what surprise songs I would get and what surprise songs I would want. Well, she's in this era where she's doing like very glee medleys, mashups if you will. So I would just put out into the universe like what songs do you want to hear? Like just give me two. I do feel like most of my songs are on the set list. Yeah. I'm going to put I'd really like to hear Peace.

I'd really like to hear the other side of the door. And I would really like to hear Coney Island. Perhaps with like, you know, I know she brought out, I know that was Cowboy Like Me for Marcus Mumford. But Aaron Dessner like, I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island wondering where did my baby go? Does she sing Snow on the Beach? In the set? No. I like that song. I know you do. Bigger than the whole sky? I mean, it's so sad, but I would love to hear that too. I really like that song. Marjorie and Gold Rush?

Marjorie is in the set. Gold Rush is not. I'd like to hear Gold Rush. Marjorie, for me, is a top moment of the tour. And I wasn't even particularly looking forward to hearing it when I went. It wasn't going to be a bathroom song, but it was one that was top of mind. And it was the one that really got to me all three times that I went. Dear John?

She doesn't play Dear John, but she has done it as a surprise song. That would be a really good one. That would be a really good one. I'm mad. I was also thinking, I listened to Dear John. It's so crazy that you said that. I listened to Dear John on the toast today, and I was thinking if Taylor comes up, I wanted to remark how like, seriously, I don't know if anybody's ever written something meaner than I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town. We actually have that on one of our lists. Maybe that's what made you think of it. Because when we did our Patreon. No, I was listening to it on the way to work today. That's what made me think of it.

When we did our Patreon of my list, I have a list of quotes. Oh, I'm sorry. This wasn't even in the Patreon episode. I have a list of quotes and it's just one quote. I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town. So I don't know what that list was originally meant to be, but I think it should be like extremely cutting Taylor Swift lyrics. Like you don't even realize like it's seriously so fucking mean, but like in a good way. Oh, okay. I don't think that's what it set out to be. I think it was just like poignancy. Yeah.

Your sad empty town. Oh my God, kill me. Like so mean. But also it's like kind of mean to other people who live there. Like what did they do? It's empty. Nobody lives there except for this person because he's pushed everyone away. Loserville population, you.

Loserville Population U. That's what she said. She literally rewrote Loserville Population U into like a more sophisticated song lyric. That's exactly it. I'm shining like fireworks over Loserville Population U. Well, probably Nikki Garcia is listening to that song right now, but just don't worry. In a couple months time, you'll be listening to Lover. I totally forgot that's what we were talking about. Maybe dancing to it at your wedding. Yeah. Yeah.

I hate Artem. Like, I knew it. I knew it. He gives one of those vibes. Like, everybody from Dancing with the Stars is like, we love Artem. And I was just like, ew. And I was right. Because, look, he was just arrested for domestic violence and his wife was leaving him. So where there's smoke, there's obviously fire. Yeah. Justice for Nikki Garcia. I fucking love her. Yeah. And look, I'm learning. I'm calling her Nikki Garcia, not Nikki Bella. Yeah. It only took me three years. But you know what? Soon, I won't even need it because it'll be Nikki Cena. Nikki Cena. Now you see me. Now you don't.

She's the invisible man. The invisible man and woman. Are you ready for our fifth and final story, which is a little more legal news? The thing is about us, like I'm always ready for the legal news. Justin Timberlake has reached a plea deal in his DWI case three months after his Hamptons arrest.

So like not to make it about us, but this case like did become more interesting after we summered in Sag Harbor. Yeah, because we really got to know the town. We literally had drinks in the bar. At the American hotel where he had been drinking. And I have to say, like surprise to nobody, he has bad taste. Like seriously, one of the most disgusting margaritas I've ever had. Oh my God. All I wanted was a cappuccino and their machine wasn't working. Couldn't even get an espresso. They were like, yeah, sure. You can have an espresso. And then they come back 25 minutes later, like sorry, the machine's broken. It was giving McDonald's with ice cream. So like-

No cappuccino, no Nespresso. And the margarita was like poisonous. So not to disparage a local, you know, mom and pop shop, but. No, it's like fancy. They'll be fine. They'll be fine. And what was funny is that like obviously everyone in town knows that this like big major scandal and all these shops like around that bar, like one of the art galleries was selling a picture of his mugshot. Like it was hysterical.

Hysterical. So Justin Timberlake has reached a plea deal in his case nearly three months after he was arrested in Sag Harbor, New York. The singer is due in court for a hearing in New York tomorrow. And the AP reports that he has agreed to a plead guilty to a less serious offense after initially being charged with driving while intoxicated. His attorney and a rep for the Suffolk County District Attorney did not immediately respond to people's request for comment.

But his lawyer has maintained that he was not intoxicated when he was arrested and booked one for running a stop sign and for failure to keep in lane. He maintains that he had one martini and his attorney would say it was a gross martini.

Perhaps a gross teeny teeny and he followed his friends home. That's his story and he's sticking to it. Like that's literally me when I'm blackout. I'm like, I'm literally sober. What are you guys talking about? I'm always maintaining like how sober I am and I can't even stand up. But martinis. You could have one martini, but like the size. Also, what did he eat that day? Martinis are very potent.

No one martini I think and don't quote me on this like scientifically I do believe one martini like a real martini is equivalent to like two and a half drinks. And if you didn't eat a lot that day maybe you hadn't drank in a while you were on a cleanse for six months like context is key. It's true I'm gonna need a toxicology report on what was in his stomach. If I had one martini right now. You would have to go to the hospital. Four.

You know, when we were at Polo Bar with Pookie and Jet, Ben had like three or four. It was really crazy. And he like never really drinks that much. I actually think Ben having like four martinis, he might even be less drunk than me having one martini right now. 1000%. So you're just a little girl. I haven't drank in forever.

I haven't eaten yet today except for a yogurt. Should we do a Patreon Jackie Has a Martini and then we just sort of follow you around with a camera crew for 24 hours. I mean that would be hysterical. Like we take you through the highs the lows the hangover everything. The hangover. That would be actually a hysterical series Jackie Has a Martini. What happens next? You'll never believe. You will never believe.

Like if I got you like round the clock childcare, like I made sure the kids were completely fine. I took us to like a local fabulous hotel. We spend the night. We have a martini and we go to bed. Like we'll see what happens after the martini. Yeah, sure. And you have to get like IVs.

Yeah, but I feel like you'd be worried about the kids. I can make Olivia stay at your house. I can make sure they are 100% fine. Yeah, no, I trust, like, you know the level of care I need, so. Yeah, no, not just Zach. I would make Margo fly down. The kids are completely fine. You have to worry about nothing. Yeah, no, I'm saying yes. I'll get around the clock. I'll get a security team, okay? Armed guards at the house. That'll be us for Taylor. Literally. Armed guards. I got you.

I said yes. It's going to be the most expensive Patreon we've ever filmed. I got to pay for flights, armed guards, armed vehicles. Just to give me a martini. Just to give her like a really worry-free night out. Yeah, but then the issue for martinis is I don't like olives.

You by the way you don't need But I don't like martini taste because I don't like olives Like do you drink a martini? No so I've actually never had a martini Until Ben was at Polo Bar And he had the most It's very off brand for me to not like olives Because I do like most gross vegetables Let me tell you what the cocktail that Ben had was It was a martini that started with a V Viper? Keep saying Vermouth? No Veranda? Honestly?

Let me just ask him. It wasn't the Veranda Martini? Why do you care? What was the name of the martini you had at Polo Bar? No, it was the Aunt Vicky Martini. That's what it was. Thank you for reminding me. Yummy. No, it was called like... Vesper. Vesper, yes. Vesper. Vesper Martini. It tasted like a sumo orange. It was delicious. Wait, what was the first thing I said? Not Vesper. Vesper.

You didn't say. Oh, by the way, not it literally being on the menu right in front of me. Vesper Martini, which is vodka, gin, lilac blanc, aromatic bitters, grapefruit twist, $36. This place is out of control. I really strongly believe the first thing I said was Vesper, and I'm so glad we'll be able to watch that back. I'm so glad, too, because I know that you did it, because when I heard Vesper, it clicked. If I had heard it, I would have known. You don't think it was just the way that she said it with authority? Vesper, as opposed to me being like, Vesper? Vesper.

You said vermouth? No, before vermouth. We'll find out soon. I'm so excited. Roll back the tape. I love that. Did we get into the fifth story? Oh, yeah. Justin Timberlake is pleading to something. So he'll probably have, you know, community service and whatnot. But this takes place tomorrow. Really looking forward to the paparazzi pictures of him in an orange vest on the side of the highway picking up my trash. Not me, like, driving by and throwing things out the window. No.

Like, hey, Justin, you missed a spot. Hey, Justin, backstreet boys were always better. Hey, Justin, you curly-headed fuck. That's what you get for drinking and driving. And I'll literally throw, like, you know, Harry's dirty diaper out the window. You ship it to me. Remind me, like, why do you hate him so much? Aside from, like, the D. Because now I feel like our level of hatred has surpassed.

The man. Well, of course, anyone who drinks and drives is automatically on my list. But for me to, like, never forget, I have to have had, like, an agent. Like, for you to throw a duty diaper at someone? Like, what did they do? Why do I dislike him beyond, like, the obvious reasons? I guess the hand-holding in New Orleans. The hand-holding in New Orleans, the Britney, the Janet Jackson, like, the... Oh, wait, wait, wait. Okay, it's all coming back to me. Thank you. Like, the long history of just being seriously, like, a...

Yeah. No, I literally forgot who he was. Brittany. Yeah. It's all coming back. Thank you. You're welcome. It's all coming back. It's all coming back to me now. Now, a little status update on my hemorrhoid pillow. I feel like it's really working. I have lots of energy. You want to usually I'm like, OK, like I'm like saying, like, let's wrap it up. You want to talk about something else? Like what's going on? I just readjusted my butt. So I have a few more minutes in me, too.

And if anyone's wondering, I'll link my pillow. I know probably everyone wants to know like where my pillow's from. Yeah, get that affiliate. Maybe we can finally retire. Yeah, we're totally gonna retire. Retire on hemorrhoids.

Listen, there are people who have retired for less. Well, we thought we were going to retire on fruit bowls. Yeah, yeah. Jackie thought that her affiliate link to her really cool fruit bowl was seriously going to put us like... I guess people were more so curious like what I paid for it because it got 30,000 clicks, but it did not get 30,000 orders. Otherwise, we seriously second home.

Now, I can't recommend this pillow enough. Like, it's really, I like the way it feels. The gel, like, it's ugly. I'll say that. And it's huge. Like, walking, I had to put it in a shopping bag. I was humiliated to walk to work with it. But let me say, my life has vastly improved. Okay. Well, maybe I need one then. You can use my, I'll send you an associate's link. Thanks. T-Y. So that's our show. Even though I could go on, you know, I really could. Good wax poetic. But we'll be back to that.

We'll save it for tomorrow. We'll save it for tomorrow. Thank you guys so much for listening to The Toast, the millennial morning show where we deliver the fast-paced stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube. So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We are also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found. So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, CastBox, all the places where you'll be listening to podcasts. Find us at Toast. Leave a five-star review about how beautiful and about our setting and about how wickedly talented we are. Have an amazing day and we'll see you tomorrow. Love ya. Bye.