The Nightmare Rock with Ashley Levy of The Blah Blah Blahs
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Okay. Here we are. Another episode of The Bald and the Beautiful. We have a guest today who is neither. She's not bald. I'll tell you that much. You were going to say she's neither bald nor beautiful. I was going to say you're neither bald nor beautiful. Ha ha ha ha.

We have a hairy, ugly guest. We have an icon. Icon. Actually, an icon who has been a pivotal guiding force in both of our careers. Yeah. Ashley Levy, songwriter. Oh, go ahead. I was just going to say songwriter extraordinaire. And you may have heard her voice and not even realized. Yes, you definitely have. Commercial songstress. Oh, that's right. That's right.

So, okay. Well, hello. Hey, guys. Thank you for joining us. Thank you for having me. So let's give a little background on how we know Ashley Levy. I met her probably the same way you did through the incredible music producer. Through the music producer Killingsworth. And you guys are like creative partners, sort of? Yes. I've been working with Tomas and everybody at Killingsworth since I'm like 16 years old.

are you serious? See, that sounds racy. Let's get into that. Oh my God. Did they snatch you off the street in a van or something? Oh man, everybody, that's like a cool story to tell, but that's not the story. So his parents were best friends with my grandparents who raised me. And when I was 16, my grandpa saw me like, you know, fiddling on garage band. And he's like, I think my best friend has a music studio in Long Island. Like you should just go intern for him and like, see what he does. And yeah,

That's what happened. I started with garage bands. Did you have this? Did you have this kind of voice when you were that young? No. Oh, my God. I wanted to sound like Josie and the Pussycats. I wanted that feminine, small voice. You know, I think that I was just listening to Letterstick Leo, their live music today. Yes. That sound is incredible and iconic. It's a beautiful. I love the mousy rock and roll voice.

the mousy rock and roll voice like Madonna has it like early Madonna okay oh yeah it's really like how would you describe that I think you I mean I love the go-go's I think you sound a little bit like Belinda Carlisle wow you told me that before and I like I had to sit down because there's there's power but there's a lot of it's kind of cutesy and it has a lot of attitude but there's obviously power to it whereas like

I think a Madonna sound, especially if you think material girl Madonna, it's almost like Julie Brown, like cartoony. I don't think you sound like that because your voice has meat to it.

Well, that took a while to get to it. At first I was like, no, I want to be a little, little mouse. Cause I was also a 350 pound girl. And like, I just wanted so badly to, to at least sound like that type of girl. Like a, like a 90 pound, barely alive. As a six foot tall bald man, when I'm in drag, I want to sound that way too. So I feel it. I'd want to sound like Kathleen Turner.

Oh, yes. We'd have to get you to train your voice up for that. But I think I heard you first. Well, I discovered you through the Blah Blah Blahs, which, you know, it's like it's one of my favorite bands. That's also like one of the best band names ever. Blah Blah Blahs. How did you guys think of that? Well, it's a read on the Yayayas. Okay. Because I can't stand Carano. Really? Not even the haircut? I've got respect.

I've got respect, but when that map song came out, I couldn't escape it. And I felt her singing from like her palate. So it was like, and I just couldn't get down with it. That is what it sounds like. But I can't, I mean, there's parts of that song to me. Maybe it's like the beginning. Sure. Do you know that song? I do. Yeah. That was really good. Yeah. It's the drums in that song are so iconic in her big round bowl cut.

I think that band has other songs that are better. I don't think that should have been their mega hit. Sure. Cause like zero is great and they have a lot of great songs, but, um, off with head was great. I loved when they got into that. Oh yeah. Yes. Yeah. That was a good one. But in the beginning I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. As the blah, blah, blah, as the yada, yada, yada. As I'm a Seinfeld fan too. Yeah.

And the way you write, I just love the way you write music. I'm such a stubborn asshole. And when anybody presents me with something, I'm like, we'll see what this sounds like. And when you, Ashley wrote, We Got the Look by yourself in your house, right? Yeah. And she sent it to me. I was on tour. I remember where I was. It was in a hotel room. And I was like, we'll see about that.

41 seconds in, I was like, I don't care what she asked for. I have to have this song. It's so, so if you ever listened to Barbara, she wrote, we got the look. And I'm glad you saw past like the demo quality. Cause it was just like acoustic guitar, like shitty drums, me like clapping and you still heard the potential in it. So I love all your music. Oh my God.

All the Right Moves I listen to it all the time Really? Yes I saw Twiggy I listen to it all the time Oh man All the Right Moves I listen to both those albums They're so good

I had so much fun writing those albums. And it was like, you know, you guys talked about that. I do commercial music. Like it became commercial music, but it was just music that I loved, you know, 50s, 60s, sunshine pop was the best pop. Yes. What is sunshine pop? It's like early beach boys. Like it just makes you feel like warm and fuzzy inside. Yeah. Good times. I think, I think one of the through lines a lot of the time is it's sometimes melodramatic content, but it sounds happy. Right. Yes. Um,

I killed my dog today. That kind of thing. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I just, I've always loved you and you wear wigs.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The first couple of times we're in the studio together. You sure did have a wig on. You had wigs on at the studio. I know. I know. I stopped doing it because the expectation became crazy. Takes me fucking three hours to get ready. And it's like I just need to like write songs and focus on that. You know, did you get dressed up? I did. I used to do the whole thing. The first three years of my writing career, I would just show up to the studio and like full drag. That's fantastic. I am with you. I've done it.

It's fun. And it helps you go in there. You've done what? I've recorded music in drag. And you go in there and you're like, I am her. Oh, you feel like that one. Yes. And like when I did Super Drags, the voiceover, the cartoon, I played a drag queen. I...

If we're going to be vulnerable. Did you tuck? I wore a head wrap and magnetic lashes and nothing else. And I stood in that sound booth and read my lines. I needed to feel it. I wore fabric wrapped around my head with little magnetic lashes on like, that's very like four years old drag. You know what I mean? Oh, I had a towel on the head with my mom's heels. Yeah.

That's your personal style. You do like a, I feel like we're so ahead of the horse here, but you're, you do like the sixties things so well. Yeah. Well, we have a lot in common that way. Musically with the style. If you got a foot taller, you could shop in my closet. I got about two feet on you. Unfortunately, you can shop off the rack for blah, blah, blah, costumes and stuff.

Not always because I have big hips. It's hard. So it's like I always have to size up and then tailor down. If you have big titties, you have to buy everything big and then have too much in the waist. Yes, right. It's the struggle. When you buy women's clothing, does it fit?

No, shoulders. Yeah. Shoulders. For me, it's always the shoulders and the arm length. You know what I mean? And sometimes you get really fit and your shoulders get big. Yeah, they just like... It's never like... I don't understand like the sizing, how it works because models will be six feet tall. Right. But then like...

I don't, I don't get it. Like, how does it, I don't, I don't get it. They're not broad at all. Right. And then also their, their arms aren't long. Also recently, everyone knows models have little T-Rex arms and legs that started their ribs. I had to, I, I'm ordering from AliExpress, like the Chinese eBay or whatever, or the Chinese Amazon. I'm a 3XL.

What? A 2XL. 2XL if I want, like, if I'm trying to be safe. 3XL if I really want the arms to fit. You know, like, I don't know what the word is, but they warn you. They say, like, this is, like, China standard sizing. So I'm, like, a 4X. Yeah. A 5. 5. 10. Yeah. I don't even want to know. That's why I don't shop. Yeah.

It's just wild. It's wild. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I got those. Do you know about these brackets that go under your face mask? What? No. Are they scented? They can if you want. I mean, you have to wash them. But yeah, they're brackets that go under your face mask. I exercise in them. And it just helps like, you know, you have some room to breathe. And I got them from China. And I ordered like a size large because I'm like, whatever. I have a wide set face. And it didn't even cover like my nose. Sorry.

It didn't even cover it. But these are faces. Like, they're not different. People don't have different, like, you know what? That's crazy. They do have a different everything. Like, no, I've seen, Chinese people don't have tiny little faces. I've seen it. Well, they don't have schnozzes. I have, like, a schnoz, so I didn't like, you know. Interesting. You got a healthy nose. Yeah, I do. Yeah.

No, it's happening. And it's crooked. Ever since you pointed that out to me, I can't. It's extremely crooked. What? To the left. Look at it. Look at it straight on. I can't tell. Your nose in drag is always crooked. I'm like, do you understand? I have to draw my nose on literally over here. Wow. Let me see it again.

That is wild. It's so crooked. That is wild. I don't want to get a nose job, but if I did, it would just be to straighten it. Yeah. I've, I've, um, I, I said in a video that she should, Oh, you need a nose job. And then people really popped off. She planted the seed. I planted, they were like, do not get a nose job. I love your nose. I used to get insecure about it because I was, you know, when you're young and you're, you're like, I'm a petite woman. But then as I got older, I was like, well, people often are guys will be like, I love your big nose. I'm like, sure. Great. Yeah.

- Yeah. - I'll take it. - I love huge noses. I also love bags under the eyes. - Oh, totally. - On men? - Big chapped lips. - On men? - Yeah, yeah. Absolutely.

No, seriously. Like the, I was, yeah, big chat, big ones though. Not thin villainous chapped lips. Like I want big chapped lips. Yeah. Sometimes like, this is so gross. I went out on a date, but I thought it was a date. I kind of like made it a date. The guy didn't think it was a date. And, um, I actually peeled a little thing off his, um, lips, like skin off that with my hands. You enjoy that? I did. And picking scabs and things. Is that part of it? Yeah.

That's the reveal of the lip skin. I was like, oh, I'm just going to get that for you. And I literally just peeled off a whole piece of dry skin off his top lip. Did you know that your lips are see-through? So your lip color is the color of what's under your skin. Really? Yes.

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The Bald and the Beautiful is supported by FX's English Teacher. From Paul Sims, the executive producer that brought you What We Do in the Shadows, FX's English Teacher follows Evan, a teacher in Austin, Texas, who learns if it's really possible to be your full self at your job while often finding himself at the intersection of the personal, professional, and political aspects of working at a high school.

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You better get into it. Are there anything, what are the most attractive qualities on a man that if you had to name, I don't know, three or four of them, what do you look for? Good hands. Good hands. Hardworking hands. Okay. Not totally like, you know, calloused up or anything like that. And not sausage fingers, but just nice hands.

You like nice big hands. Nice big and like firm. I look at it. Because as a musician, you pay attention to hands. Sure. You play guitar? I do, yes. You play keyboards? No. Not at all? Strings are great. So guitar, bass, ukulele, a little banjo, a little bit.

Can I ask? I mean, obviously you've written music for both of us. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, who's your real claim to fame and what? Cause I know you were in a Revlon commercial, right? When you heard all the right moves in Revlon commercial, were you like, I've made it.

I was screaming because models are singing my lyrics while they're like having a pillow fight. It's like crazy. That was damn it. That was wild. Yeah. It's like a huge payday, huh? Those like, that's like the dream, right? I mean, it's, it's for sure. You got this rich. It helps sustain. So that part of my life helps me like be able to do everything else. Yeah. You know, have they, have you placed this in that yet?

Yes, it was in an NBC promo. That is so... Was it NBC or ABC? Oh my God, I could get in trouble for not knowing. Can we tell the listeners, I don't think they... You have a musician career that's unique in that you guys often put out music...

With the intention of it being in commercials. Yeah. So it's like, it's like instant earworm me and not generic, but let's say feel good and could be put into a lot of things. Right. Yeah. And very, uh, not generic lyrics, but certainly like universal, universal, universal. Like when I heard this and that I was like, I back to school. Sure. Shopping target. How do you, I was thinking about that. Like, so, you know, if you're,

like something that is commercial is designed to appeal into please the eyes and ears of, of, of like as many viewers as possible. So how do you like, how do you come up with, um,

a sound that is pleasing like to as many is that that's the goal right to to do you have like specific goals in mind or like how do you come up with a sound or how would you describe a sound that is like universally pleasing can you tell us can you tell us all how to do your job no no no no i know that's like so ridiculous can you tell us all how to steal your gig look beautiful

No, it makes sense what you're saying. But I think when you're writing for an ad, there's a certain way of writing. Okay. When you're writing for a promo, there's a certain way of writing. So there are formulas for everything. Gotcha. But in terms of like the lyrics that you use, like you have to be really mindful of like, okay, we can't sing about love. Okay. We can't gender anything. Interesting. Yeah. It's like it goes...

It goes deep, you know? Because people could not choose a song just based on one word. Right. So you want to have the best shot possible. Yeah, cunt is usually one of them. And you guys, the vibe you guys choose to, it's almost, I want to say it's almost...

Smash Mouth. I hope that is a compliment. I love Smash Mouth. Because it's retro, but it sounds like it was recorded yesterday. Right. So it could be placed in a lot of different, like it doesn't sound like, like music of today. It sounds like music of any time. Right. I don't. Oh, okay. I'm trying to wrap my head around. Cause it sounds kind of retro, but it also has tricks in it that make it sound fresh and cool. And I feel like Smash Mouth is like the master of that. Like walking on the sun. Oh,

It could have been recorded yesterday. It's like 20 years old. I got you. It's 20 years old now. And it was kind of a retro sound of something from like 30 years before that. And it still sounds fresh. Right. And if you like music like that, it's really easy to write music like that. Like my main, like who I always look to is the B-52s. Icons. Oh my God. Do you know they don't have a Grammy? What? They don't have a Grammy. They were nominated for best ensemble vocal arrangement for Love Shack. Didn't win. They don't have a Grammy.

I always thought the Grammys were shit. Aren't they just... Is it just a... It's just a political... Like, who cares? I mean, is it...

It depends who you talk to. We won't say it. The people who have Grammys will say like, this is a big deal. Okay. And like, you know, I could say it's not a big deal, but then get a Grammy tomorrow and be like, oh no, this is a big deal. You know? Totally. Her tune's totally going to change. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think you could get one in your lifetime 100%. Absolutely. We all can. Absolutely. Everyone in this room can. I'm getting, I'm going to get a Grammy. I'm putting it on my vision board. Iggy told me like she was nominated and she lost and she felt like she was happy she lost because she,

Then, especially in that world, when you win and she was, that was her first year with fancy and everything. So she's overnight number one. Yeah. Right. And she's like, then everyone's going to hate me if I win. Oh, that's true. Yeah. We're only nominated once and they lost for beauty in the beat, even though they had the first female rock album to be at number one for like two months.

And they were like, we're happy we didn't win because then people didn't hate us. But I also think it's a people hate women thing. Oh, well, yeah, that's always. Yeah. And women in rock, especially. It's really tough. It's really, really tough. Isn't it like they would be like, isn't it cool that you're a woman who got a Grammy? Like it would be that like how people say you're my favorite female comedian.

Yeah, what is that? I was like, comedy and music is like, it's just brutal. It's just brutal for like women. Maybe it's because we're big fags and we don't listen to, I don't listen, I like male comedians, but I wouldn't say they're my, my top 10 is not mostly men. All the music I listen to is female vocals. Pretty much 90% of it. Absolutely. I can't stomach male vocals. Really? This one. Yeah.

No, I really can't. I really don't. 90%. 95%. She doesn't like a lot of live music, period. She doesn't like singing. I didn't know that. No, I do like... So she doesn't like you. I like live music, but I don't like English vocals. You don't like English vocals, right? And I don't like male. So it's a guy singing in English. Get it out of here. Bring a book. Yeah, bring a book. Exactly. But that's where we connect because I also have an appreciation for music that is...

Not in English. Let me tell you. Let me tell you. Let me tell you this one. So we got to the studio. So I'm going to back it up a little bit. So you helped me write all the songs on Vampire Fitness. And she was so good at like... Which is the number one electronic album, by the way. Yeah, number one. Give it up. Oh, wow. There's so many people...

I really got to label these. Yeah, you do. You do. There's so many people to thank. So I have no idea how to write a song, obviously. And so you were so helpful in that you arranged all the lyrics. We just had a bunch of lyrics for Ravioli. And then you came up with that lovely demonic children's choir kind of thing. So weird, you guys. I love you both.

That song creeps me out. Ravioli does? But you know what? I feel like a song like that, you're allowed to feel what you feel from it. I don't think that's not meant to creep me out.

It's not, no. It's terrifying sounding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not supposed to make you feel like you're going back to school. Also, look at the material. Me in this pink house being like, oh my God. Oh, there's some demon shit on that track. But then she had to sing, she had to do backup vocals for a song in Russian, a song in Italian, and then a song in Portuguese. You slayed. Yeah. Woo.

Multilingual. She's speaking under you, right? Like on Ding Dong, you're the woman voice with her on every. On the verse. Yeah, on every verse. Or the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Well, I think there's one part that doesn't, but yeah. Oh, the chorus. Yeah, I don't think on the chorus. But just tucked in there just to help a little bit. But she really does help. She's like the stuffing in my bra feminizes the voice a little bit. Do you know what I mean? Like you're the gaffe in bra for my like. Yeah. With a male voice, nothing's more feminizing than a real female voice right next to it.

You guys should be really proud of it. It's fucking cool. Thank you. Yeah. It was a lot of fun. I cannot believe how like, you know, it's taken me what, 10 years to develop like a halfway decent Russian accent and she just goes in there and then like gets it in three tries. It's so crazy. Well, I used to study, um,

All of that, like linguistics and I'm not good at languages. Like I took Japanese classes last year and I broke down crying in the middle of class because she asked me a question. I was like, ah, and there was like eight people in this class, mind you. And I'm just like in the middle of the class crying. Was it Weijin's? It was Weijin's.

I'm assuming it was a lot of like 18 year old, like a couple of them. But some people like working at Google that are just like, oh, I have this job in Japan, Google that I need to go like learn the language now. Interesting. Mixed bag. Yeah. That sounds so hard. Oh, it'd be so fun for you to write cute music in Germany. Oh, I do. I go to Japan every year before pandemic. Are you serious? Japan-demic. Japan-demic.

But yeah, I go there every year and I make like a working vacation out of it. So I have connections there that I can, you know, work with J-pop artists and also like, you know. And you write with them? Shut the hell up.

Oh, it's so much fun. You are like my hero. Yeah. Oh my God. You have a cool life. You have a cool life. Now to pivot to beauty because once in a while we do have to talk about. Oh, we're pivoting. We'd like to acknowledge that on this, we called it the bald and beautiful and we had to not talk about beauty once. We have to talk about hair or lack of thereof. When did you embrace the smoke and mirrors of cosmeceuticals? Cause you really go with the hair and the makeup.

You mean in drag or out of drag? Like both. When did you get into it? Well, I was raised by a hairdresser. My grandma is a hairdresser. She's a beautician. So like very, very young, I was like putting way too much blush on, making mistakes with the eyeliner, you know, but she encouraged experimenting. Yeah.

Cool. So, and she was really into drag Queens too. Really? Oh, absolutely. Oh wow. What a lucky like grandma to have. Yeah. She's, she's wonderful. But, um, yeah, so it's always been a part of my life. Like I grew up with a beauty parlor in my house cause she worked from the house. I know, I know. I'm really spoiled.

So it was always like something fun to do. It was never like, you know, drag is never a drag in a sense. Or was it always something like fun? Yeah. You know, and lucky for you, it sounds like the vocabulary was set up that there was no clean line about costume and,

And normal makeup and crazy makeup. It's like. Right. And also I went to private school. So I was in a uniform for most of my childhood. So when it was time to like have fun with clothes and makeup, like I was there. You went off. Oh, yes. I think uniforms are great for that. Yes. They kind of like equalize everybody to a certain extent and then also like make you appreciate your own personal style. Yes. It becomes all about who has the flashiest eyebrow ring or whatever. Yeah. Yeah.

If they allow an eyebrow ring. Everything I know about private school I learned from the craft. So like, don't go by me. No, they could definitely not dress like they do in the craft in a private school. Oh, really? No. No, my God. No, no, no. Absolutely not. You would get detention if your skirt was too high. Like, that's an actual rule. Okay, so the girls roll them up, right? The girls to be slutty. They roll them up. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. But it depends on the private school. So like mine was a little more like lackadaisical. So if you rolled it up like twice, it was fine. But there was this one called Kellenberg where it's like you couldn't even dye your hair. You couldn't paint your nails. Like anything that was unnatural on the body, you weren't allowed to come to school with. Wow. Unnatural on the body. Yeah.

Yeah. So luckily I wasn't in that school. Yeah. I'm fine with whatever. Like people can look as extreme as they want. Yeah. Then again, I don't know. I'm more into, I would like be more concerned about behavior rather than like appearance.

You know what I mean? It's like, no, don't bring a gun to school and don't shoot anybody. It's like, wear your black lipstick. Yeah. But get good grades and don't mess with it. You know what I mean? Absolutely. Yeah, sure. But if it's Catholic school, the black lipstick means the devil, something else. Yeah, totally. You're a pig from hell. Yeah. Um, are you Catholic?

spiritual person. Okay. I don't, you know, subscribe to one particular thing. Crystals? Candles? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh, you have a good crystal story. Oh, oh no. Is it a crystal story? No, it's the good crystal story. We have a crystal, we're going to take a break.

And we're back for the crystal story. All right. Crystal AB dance button. So, so when we were working together, who is it? It was a couple of years ago. We started doing the album like probably three years ago. No. What? Why is that funny? No, I actually remember that because I remember you telling me about your food album. Yes. Yes. Right. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And originally it was like we had a, it was a bit more ambitious. We had like eight tracks or something like that. And then there was one, you had, you had done an arrangement in Sanskrit and Latin.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we cut those because dead languages don't really like burn up the dance floor. Turns out. True. Turns out. Turns out. In a dramatic turn of events. A language that's been dead for thousands of years. Womanizer ends and people are like, I want to hear something I don't understand. Something liturgical. Yeah. Yeah.

But then, so you, what was it that, that this rock, it was. Oh my God. So I had Katya over. It was, I had Katya over for raviolis because we were just talking about. Yes.

writing ravioli and I'm like I have ravioli I can make sauce come on you know come over I love your accent oh yeah I can make a sauce it's amazing yeah oh hardcore Long Island Long Island but um so basically I I had this I wasn't going through like a weird time and I have a very spiritual friend who's into like crystals and stuff and I'm like Desi and he also has a company called developmental now where he just like has these amazing like it's like a

I don't even know how to describe it. It's just all spiritual things that help you in your lifestyle. But basically he was like, oh, you need to get some modal Moldavite. It'll help you like get through this change in your life. I'm like, great. I go to the crystal store and they're like, you want Moldavite?

And they have to actually take it out of a locked box. It's separate from all the other crystals. What? Moldavite. Moldavite. It's considered one of like the darker stones because it pushes you through transitions. So they were like... Dark that. What are you going through? Dark that. Yeah, they looked at me like, Moldavite, huh? You got a demon? You got a demon in your closet? Yeah. And the thing about the Moldavite... Oh, you're looking it up? Yeah, it's green, huh? It's green, yeah. So it's from a meteor that...

hit the earth and because of the chemical changes

Like all these properties and moldavite help you go through like extreme changes. So anyway, Desi said, okay, you have to sleep next to it for like five days before you even put it on your body. You have to align your energy to it. So first night slept with it. No problem. Second night, I had like just weird stress dreams. Third night, my boyfriend wakes up screaming next to me. He's like, is that nightmare rock in the room? Oh,

Mind you, it's next to me. It's next to me on the bed. And he's like, get that thing out of there. He's having a traumatic dream. And then the next day after that, you were coming over for ravioli. And I know you were going through transition as well. Yes, I certainly was. She still is. Transition. But you operate on a certain frequency that I'm like, I...

- Absolutely. - I'm like, you know what? I think this would be better off in your hands. - Yeah, yeah. - And I gave her the Moldavite that night and then I checked in a couple of days. I'm like, how's the rock treating you? And you loved it. - I love that rock. She gave me the best dream. - What?

One man's nightmare rock is another man's. Yeah, dreamscape spectacular. Wow. Yeah, because I think like, you know, it was so funny because I think I slept, it was on a pendant. Yes. And I think I slept with it on for like, I wore it. Straight up? Yeah, she goes right in. Ashley, are we surprised? Oh, please, please.

Are we surprised? If you said like, do not go into that closet. You know, it's haunted. I would just be, I'd be just jump right in there. She'd be there jerking off. Yeah, I love that shit. Oh my God. It's fun. Do you still have it? Is it around? Yeah, I think so. Oh, that's good. I think it's like I might've like molded into a butt plug and stuck it on my ass. However you have to bond with it, you know? Can I ask when as a performer did you start, I mean for a woman to embrace the wig, did

And you don't wear like a pop star wig. You wear like a stylized, like a B-52s wig. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't wear just like a fall. Do you use your real hair in the front? Or is it a full wig? It's a full wig. Wow. Because in the beginning, I was brunette when I was first doing the blah, blah, blahs. And I'm like, I feel like she has to be blonde. Oh, 100. And then also, it's like, I don't want to, because I grew up,

up with a beautician like I knew I didn't want to tease my hair all the time because it would destroy my hair and teasing color treated lifted super lifted hair it's yeah lifted oh there's like bleached lift the color for her to lift from her natural hair color to that and style it all the time oh it would have been a nightmare bald well I did I did have to cut it off like the first hairdresser I had in LA burned my hair off they burned it right off yeah so I had to that's why I think when I met you my hair was a lot shorter oh

Oh, I remember that. Yeah. So that wasn't by choice. You like the long? I love having long hair. I like the long on you. I love short hair too, though, because it's so easy and you could do fun things with it. I did like all kinds of like faux hawks, like the Brody Dale fantasy, you know. The what now? Brody Dale from the Distillers. Oh, I don't know them.

I think she was or is married to the singer Rancid. Oh. I don't know. I haven't checked in on her, but you know. If you guys Google the blah, blah, blahs right now and you see her album covers, it's a wig. It's a huge wig. It's huge. I got it from Outfitters wig though. Oh, I was going to say, yeah, they're from Outfitters. It looks like an Outfitters wig. Huge sculptural like helmets. Yeah. They're amazing. Well, you know who helped me pick it out actually? Sharon. Sharon Needles. Oh, that's right. Oh, because you worked. Now that's the Moldavite. Yeah.

I get her some Moldavite. Yeah, she has. I'm sure she has some. She is walking Moldavite. You've worked on, how many drag race alumni albums have you worked on? So many. Oh, so many. It's a dream. Sharon's. I can't even tell you. PG-13. Oh, wow. When that came out, it was, Sharon, I'm sure you're listening. That was the best drag album that ever, it was amazing. There was nothing like it. Those songs are amazing. Call me on the Ouija board.

Oh, so much fun, right? Big Flew the Chat. I love that song. It's great.

It's so good. We had a lot of fun writing that album. And that was like one of the last albums where we really made like a party and an event out of it. I like, I haven't had that kind of experience with writing a full album. What do you mean? Say more about that. What is like a party or an event? So like basically David would make these beautiful spreads of food. He made like an apple cobbler on the barbecue. Like David Charpentier. Yes. Are you,

He's a very talented cook. David Charpentier, you've been holding out on us. I was going to say, I can barely get a phone call. Grilled cobbler? You've been found out. I know. Oh, it's going down. It's going down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can't return my phone calls, but you can grill some pastries for Sharon. Okay. Barbara's on the charts again. You got this right. I'll send you some flowers. Meanwhile, I got a rack of ribs for Sharon. Oh my God. So how long would it take to write the album? The album?

- The album, I mean, I was still working a nine to five job in New York that I just quit and I was like, well, I'm gonna do the Sharon record. - Girl, you guys snapped. And honestly, that album, you wanna talk like opening it, 'cause it's like RuPaul's Supermodel, that's probably the next Drag Race album that opened that door more for any of us. - Right. - It's amazing. And did you do Battle Axe? - Yes. - That song is so good.

And Tomas and Shiny. I should have known it was you. It's so you guys. That song is amazing. Well, Sharon's fun because she comes in with like a fully developed like this is the concept. Help me like put a melody to these words. Like Sharon has just books and books of words. Yeah. She's a rock star. Oh, she's a freaking rock star. And the voice is great. And this is not a read to Sharon. I've seen her get up there in a blackout.

Oh, yeah. Sing the words and the notes. Really? Yes. I mean, she just can do it. Yeah. My like most iconic moment was I toured a Halloween thing with her and she gets wheeled on on stage in a coffin. Right. And one night they were like, all right, everyone knows Sharon's going to come out of the coffin. But what if you were in there, too? And then halfway through the set, you pop out like you've been suffocating the whole time in there. So it's Halloween, actually Halloween. And I'm in the coffin face to face with Sharon. And I'm like, oh, my God.

on stage for like 30 minutes in in a coffin together no but it was like being in santa's sleigh on christmas oh i don't know that i would say santa was like i was gonna say in santa's sack with a bunch of dead cats so then she gets out and does half her set she's laying on the coffin i'm still in there i'm like smiling and then halfway through the show i

Bust out of it. I love Sharon. What an icon. I mean, if it weren't for her, I wouldn't be with my boyfriend. Really? Yeah. So I was out with Sharon because she calls me up when she's in town. You know, pre-pandemic, we could go to like, you know, the Burgundy Room and hang out. And I was out with Sharon. And then Grant, who wasn't my boyfriend yet, he called me up and he's like, hey, what are you doing? And I'm like, oh, you got to come out, meet my friend Sharon. And like, yeah.

He's a comic too. He's a professional comic. So when he was talking to Sharon, he was like, wow, I feel like I'm talking to a comic. Like, cause he had never like been in the drag queen community, you know, like it's,

and drag queens, it's a weird separation. I don't know why. Miles apart. I don't understand it. Miles apart. Because there's so many similarities. Yeah. But yeah, she's like, oh, I feel like I'm talking to like a comic. This is crazy. And then when he left, Sharon was like, you got to keep this one around. You got to stop hoeing around. You got to lock this one down. Not Sharon saying you got to stop hoeing around. It's the multibite. Yeah.

Did you work on Alaska's albums? Yes. You did. How many? So who, like go down the list. Who's albums? So it started with Sharon, Alaska, Violet Tchotchke, Miss Fame. Did you do Betty? Yes. Betty.

Tommy Lee did Betty too. Tommy Lee. Those are Tommy Lee drums. Ashley, you are so iconic. Betty was so good. Oh, I love that song so much. I think that one is my favorite. Violet, all of you snapped. If you guys at home have not heard Violet's album, her song Betty, her EP. Yeah, it's so good. It's so, so good. It's kind of vampire fitness adjacent. Oh, I mean, I would like, I would die. Like if I would absolutely just redo that song.

You should. Yeah. Maybe. Because it's an industrial vibe, right? It would be like a Betty Part 2. What's another name for Betty? Petty. I was just going to say Petty. The studio, the people in the studio love it. Lori Petty. Okay. And then who else? So, okay, Miss Fame, which a lot of that actually turned out great to my surprise. Oh, it's great. She has a beauty. She can get whimsical and ethereal. Yeah.

Well, you know, she doesn't exactly have like a songbird vocal. She has a David Bowie quality in her voice. Oh, I hear that. Like if you listen in certain parts, yeah. Like she can, the way she enunciates and stuff is very Bowie to me sometimes. And you want to talk crystals and energy. Oh, yeah. That freak is nude in Switzerland right now. Stroking a crystal. In some like hot springs, just like getting in tune with the divine. Yeah, absolutely. Completely dewy skin looking over her shoulder like...

Acceptance is the key to transcendence. Totally. She's a wacko jacko. Who's your, can I ask, who's like your dream collaboration? Like what artists would you love to write for or sing with? In life? In life. Dead or Alive? Your world is your cluster. Dead or Alive? Oh my God. Okay, Alive? The band Dead or Alive. I love Dead or Alive. Oh my God. Is that Pete Townsend? No, Townsend. No, you spin,

right who's the one who's the um the pete davidson not davidson anyway sorry go back to it sorry i think alive julian casablanca's i'm a big strokes fan love the strokes oh my god that 1251 song is embarrassingly good i know i know who do you think is the most beautiful voice

Beautiful? Yeah. You covet their voice. I mean, Adele. Adele. Adele. It's next level. A full-bodied, beautiful, like, clarinet voice. It's amazing. What does that mean, clarinet voice? So when I hear voices, like Sam Smith to me is a saxophone. If you listen to the tone of his voice, I hear, okay, the same kind of sound comes out of a saxophone. To me, Adele could be a clarinet. Adele's more of like a woodwind. What's Celine Dion?

She's, she can be brass. Yes. She could be brass or she could be an oboe for sure. Okay. Who's Michael Bolton? Oh, he's, he's, he's a French horn. French horn.

That's interesting. What about, sorry, I'm going to keep going. No, I like it. Who's Brittany? Yeah, Brittany Spears. Oh my. A kazoo? I'm just kidding. I sense flavor sometimes with voices, like especially women's voices. Oh, that's cool. Like confections, like flavors, like foods. Okay, what's Brittany? Brittany to me is like a caramel. Really? Wow. I can see that. Because it's so mellow and like.

Yeah. What about more stylized speaking in a way? Yeah. What about like Joan Jett? I love Joan Jett. Yeah. Oh my God. But what confection is she? Yeah. And what instrument and what flavor is she? She is a, she is a flavor blasted goldfish. No.

I'm not saying they all pop out very obvious. Sure, sure. I saw her when I was 16. I was at a pride festival and I was in a sea of lesbians. And she's, you know, 65 in patent leather with a corset with white paper, white skin singing this song fetish. And then the interpreter is having to interpret all these pornographic lyrics. And she's humping him and rubbing her crotch. And I was just like, what?

Yes. I just, I love, I mean, the Runaways, the cultural impact. Sure. Iconic. The Cranberries, Dolores O'Riordan. What flavor? That's a fun voice too. Yeah. That is fun. She's like a, In there, Bob. Yeah. Miso soup? No. No.

Beautiful voice. Yeah, gorgeous. Haunting. Yeah, haunting. What instrument would she be? She's a woodwind to me. I'm not exactly sure which one. She's going to have to do some research. Yes. What's a woodwind? It's like a woodwind would be like a flute or a clarinet or an oboe. And what's a bassoon? That's a woodwind. That's a woodwind. A woodwind. Yeah. Just checking on different instruments. Just checking in. Yeah, just checking in. Yeah.

You're going to think about that though, right? When you listen to voices now. Also like, yeah, instruments and flavors too. What flavor are you? What's your singing? Oh, it's probably like, it's like something that's too dry. I think it's chain tobacco. It's like, you know, something too crispy in your mouth gets all dry. It's a Triscuit.

Yeah. It's a cracked olive oil rosemary Triscuit. That's it. Oh, I love that. That's my favorite Triscuit. With no drinks around. Oh. Really stressful. And no cheese. Really stressful. I love the sound of your voice. I do too. It's so beautiful. And it's the perfect amount of like, it sounds good, but it doesn't, you don't sing like you're trying to sing. You sing like you're

Like telling a story. Yes. It's like, you're not trying to like, it's more like the attitude and the delivery because the foundation is so like, yeah, it's a great voice. Yeah. You sing it like you mean it. Like it's a story. I just love it. Well, it is effortless. Yeah. Incredible. Raw. Do you want to know where people can listen to you? You guys have to listen to Ashley's music. Yeah. Oh yeah. So you could check us out at the blah, blah, blahs music on Instagram. And then it's just the blah, blah, blahs on Spotify. Yeah.

And we have a couple of music videos out too. You could YouTube us. I love you guys. Super duper. Yeah. Wait, I want to ask something else. Who do you think, who would play her? Yeah. Who would play Ashley in a movie? Who would play you in a movie, the movie of your life, who would play you? And then also who in contemporary music do you think is a no talent piece of shit motherfucker who doesn't deserve their success? Fierce. So who would play you? Yeah. Who would you like to play you? Who would I like to play me?

That's a really tough question. I've never thought about this. What do you guys think? You guys know me well enough. I'm thinking of your face reminds me of like a few different actresses and I'm trying to think of who. It's...

Well, depending on my weight, I've gotten Claire Danes. Yep, I can see that. Oh, I can see that. I'm thinking it's, is it Emma Stone from The Face? No. No. Really? I definitely see Claire Danes. Claire Danes, yep. I'll take her, Romeo and Juliet, Claire Danes. I'll take her. Anybody will take her in that role. So beautiful. Broke Down Palace. We're the Broke Down Palace Claire Danes. Emma Stone, or I'm talking about.

And then who's your contemporary? It's music that everyone hears that you're like, why? Oh, come on. I see Emma Stone. Hold on. Really? Yeah. Smile.

Yeah. Listen, she's beautiful. Yeah. Well, thank you. Oh, that's very sweet. And then, yeah, I don't know. January Jones for some reason is also what I'm seeing. January. Or if you're, if you're Spanish speaking, she's so beautiful. I don't know. Yeah. Britney Snow. Britney Snow. Oh, I love Britney Snow. She's fun. She played Amber in Hairspray. She's not going to know what that is. Britney Snow.

Britney snow into the. Oh yeah. Oh, I know who that is. She has big eyes, big lashes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She'll have to wear brown contacts, but that's okay. And then what's the contemporary music that you're just like, why do people live? Yeah. Is there like a, is there a fad or like a, like, yeah.

Well, it's hard, right? Because like I have to like keep my pulse on like what's going on. Absolutely. Now. And but what I really like to do is like when I'm cooking, I listen to the turtles. So the turtles. I love the turtles. So my heart is in the past, but I have to keep my pulse on what's happening now. And I'm going to say because I said I just watched the documentary on Takashi 69. Oh, is that the guy, the the predator raper? He's a lot of things. Yeah, he's he's.

A lot of run-ins. I don't know. I don't want to get in trouble. I don't want anybody coming after me. Oh, that's... Yeah, yeah. Hold on. Let's keep it. Keep it hush-hush. But also, I just... I don't think I understand it. Like, most, like, trap artists, I would say. Like, I get it, but that's not, like, where my heart is. So, like, to my ears, I'm like, I'm not going to listen to that. Yeah. Yes. Very in the school of, like, there's no right answer in music. So, it's always from, like, if I don't like it, I'm like, yeah, it does nothing for me. I don't get it. Right. Yeah. Sure. That's the thing. Yeah.

do you think art, I mean, I'm trying to think about like if other art works that way, like the same way it does in music because it seems like, okay, I've accepted the fact that some music just sounds like total fucking shit to me and it can be the, you know, the most inspiring thing to somebody else. Does that work with other stuff? Like, I think so. Um, because I don't love friends, but,

But I know that people love both the show and people. I don't like having friends. But I know if everyone loves it, it's gotta be hilarious. It's just not my thing. I'm also not into friends. But if so many people love it, it's gotta be something to it. No, I think one, two, three, that makes us right. Well...

millions of people are wrong. Yeah. We're right. Yeah. And music is the thing that is like, like, you know, film, television, even like painting or whatever. I mean, music is the ultimate snobby. Like that is the thing that people love to get completely snobby and judgmental about. And it's like when people say like, I have the best taste in music. I'm like, yeah, everyone thinks they do. Everyone. Have a great day. Yeah. Especially metalheads, especially metalheads.

I dated one for a long time and he didn't want to hear anything else about any other genre of music. Oh yeah. So you came home to like, like, like,

like that music playing yeah and like even harder than that and I listen to it but it's gotta be in another language like there's I know a whole bunch of metal Japanese bands I love oh that's fun yeah did you like Evanescence back in the day who didn't like that song that's what I'm saying oh I hated that Evanescence was so wonderful they were great they had a great song I hated that what was that album called bring me to life no uh

I don't even know. Wake me up inside. Yes. In essence, I hate that shit. I've never liked music like that. But for some reason, when they came out, I don't know if her voice is beautiful. The songs were great. But I would never listen to that type of music again. No. Yeah. I can appreciate that. Like the oh, nice vocals. I suppose that music doesn't sound like pots and pans banging around. But I hate it so much. It's like I don't like pop at all.

I know that Ariana is probably one of the best voices of our generation, but I don't like the songs because I don't like pop. But I know she's a great singer, of course. I feel the same way. Is it weird to say that I feel like her voice is not being used to its...

Not like it's not being, I feel like it's wasted on the music that she makes sometimes. Yeah. Like I hope one day she does like a, like a, like I bet you she could murder some like hymns, ballads. Yeah. Hymnals. Please praise him from whom all blessings flow. I'm bathing in blood. Yeah. Something like that. Did you sing in church? Is that how you got your start?

Oh no. It was like, I went to Lutheran school, so it was not fun church Baptist music. I wish. I wish. Lutherans. Like I do gospel now because I'm making up for lost time. And you're trying to atone for your slutty days. Yeah. Your backwards lifestyle. Before Sharon put you on the right track. Yeah, Sharon knows about it. Yeah.

How slutty are you that Sharon has to say, you know, you really need to pull back? Yeah, that's scary. There was a new, every time I saw her, there was just a new guy. You know? Slut. I had just moved to Los Angeles. I was having fun. Yeah. I don't blame you. You're young, you're beautiful, you're talented. Take the world. Yeah. So you're wild oats. Absolutely. Well, that's, I mean, I've been with this man for almost like four years now. And it's great. I prefer a relationship, personally. Like, I don't know how you guys feel about it, but. I'm still trying. Yeah.

I'm always LTR. I always have a boyfriend. Yeah, she does. Yeah. Serial monogamous. Serial monogamous. Yeah. It's just something more cozy about it. Yeah. And sometimes you do have to, you know, hold out. So I got to hold out. Oh, I know. Fuck everyone. Oh, that's right. I keep forgetting. Yeah. She's in a relationship. Wait, a question. What is cuffing season?

So what does that mean? So cuffing season is especially like when you're on the East Coast, right? Boston, like the colder months you find somebody to like snuggle up with in the winter. And then you hold on to them until the late spring comes and then it's like party time. And then it's get the fuck out of here. What does cuffing mean though? So it's more like we're going to shack up at least for the next few months because we're going to be going out less. It's cold. Yeah. We're handcuffed to each other. Yeah. And everyone's wearing cufflinks.

And their pants are tight rolled. Yeah, and they're in like a chain gang. Okay. Yeah. Okay, got it. That makes sense. Well, Ashley, we love you. Yeah, thank you so much. One of our favorite people. Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. And continue to inspire the world with your beautiful voice. Yes, go listen to Blah Blah Blahs. I'm promising you'll never heard anything like it. You're going to love it. Yay. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

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