Shownotes Transcript
- Hey, Stavi and guests, big fan of the show. Really appreciate y'all. I have a problem with this girl that I've seen maybe six times in the past two weeks, right? Like we had influenced it off. Things should be going really well. Sex has been great. But I think I gave her bed bugs. - Ooh. - Right, she's been itching and stuff. You know, I have bed bugs from bad weeks. - Yo, you think? - What? - No, you did it. - She hasn't texted me since I saw her itching in her bed the other night.
And I think I lost her. Is there any way to get her back? Fuck you. You deserve to lose her, you dirty bitch. What the fuck are you doing giving her? You know you have bed bugs. You knew. You knew you have bed bugs. Come on, man. What the fuck is wrong with you, dude? Come on, man.
Come on. You know how annoying bedbugs are? What the fuck? Who are you? Who's the dirty ass kid from Charlie Brown? Oh, Pigpen. Pigpen. Little Pigpen. Yeah, yeah. You're just walking around. You're just cool with having bedbugs? He says he had bedbugs like he was born with diabetes, like type 1. You know, sadly, I have fucking sickle cell. You get bedbugs, motherfucker, and you have to take care of them. You just have bedbugs, and you're just letting it chill? You're going on dates? Yeah.
How long did he... Did he have the bedbugs from the beginning? It sounds like it. She's been itching and stuff. You know, I have bedbugs from... She hasn't texted me since I saw her. No, you're fucked. Yeah, it's over. You're fucked and you deserve not to... I've been in the same position where I've just like... I got... A girl told me like, hey, I might have... Thank God I didn't have them. I called the fucking like... There's this dog that sniffs out bedbugs.
Okay. I called him. You need that guy. He's a little beagle. They're cute as fuck. They're little beagles. Yeah. And I've said goodbye to some no strings attached, pretty good pussy because she said I might have bedbugs. And I was like, it just ain't worth it. Yeah. You're fucked, pal. She's a hot girl. You're a fucking dumbass with bedbugs. You don't think she has better options? Yeah, brother. You're fucked. You deserve it. Do you think a new mattress would do it?
Like if you hit her and was like, hey. Oh, with her? Yeah, three Gs. Got you one of the purple Jones. Yeah, the phone. Do you, I mean, even still, you're probably still done, but I'm just thinking theoretically. Would a new mattress do it? If they had such a great connection and he like gets her place fumigated.
and like make sure there's no bed bugs and gets her a fucking a bunch of shit maybe but like he has bed bugs. He hasn't solved his own bed bugs. He's gonna solve hers. - You're gonna have to get new apartments. Hey girl, I got you a new apartment. - You're fucked and you deserve it, man. - Yeah.
What were you going to say, Eldest? Maybe she's embarrassed to reach out because she thinks she gave him bedbugs. True. She's worried about that. So that's his avenue into some pussy. That's true. Hit her up and be like, hey, do you have bedbugs or anything? It was me. I love you. No, no, no, no, no. I like where Eldest is saying. He needs to be like, hey, do you have bedbugs or anything? I suddenly noticed them since the last time we hung out. Eldest is... And then act cool about it. Then maybe you'll get some pussy. Eldest proposing going...
demon murder demon time hey did you do this to me yeah you that okay yes possible what you're gonna say is yes if you wanna if you wanna go goblin mode what you have to do you get your bed bugs taken care of immediately first but you don't he doesn't have he doesn't he hasn't done it he's been going on dates this man is just going on his life he's waiting for this episode to come out and it still has them this is insane
But if you really cared about this woman and you wanted to manipulate her and start your relationship on a foundation of pure lies... I see you. ...of gaslighting, if you wanted to do that... I see your vision. ...you clear out your bedbugs and say, hey, I felt like... Do you have... Are you itching or anything? I found, like, since we dated... You know, since that...
night you slept over I caught a couple bugs now I got my place fumigated it's totally clean but I'm just wondering because that even be like because that's not really cool bed bugs are really tough to get rid of whoa no you save that if she doesn't get back to you or if she gets back in the like more negative tone oh okay then you can switch to the negative I'll be like well okay well thanks for being honest if she's if she's like you know
yeah fuck you whatever you could be like wow well thanks for coming clean but that's really not cool to do but then if she's cool about it you could be like oh well after you get it figured out we should hang out again he's not even gonna help her clean it up she's gonna do it herself she's gotta decide that's how you get sent to Guantanamo terrorism