The episode explores the complexities of intervening in the lives of loved ones who may be heading down the wrong path, discussing when and how to intervene, and the potential consequences of such actions.
Cheryl Strayed recounts a time in her mid-20s when she was using heroin and a friend intervened by contacting her then-husband, who drove from Minneapolis to Portland to confront her. This intervention ultimately helped her find her way back to a healthier life.
The Sugars advise the person to tell the girlfriend about the incident, emphasizing the importance of speaking the truth and addressing the inappropriate behavior directly. They suggest meeting in person to clearly communicate what happened and why it was unacceptable.
Meghan Daum describes herself as generally hands-off, preferring to leave people alone unless they ask for advice. She believes in asking questions rather than offering unsolicited opinions, and she values the importance of not making interventions about herself.
The Sugars suggest that the mother should ask her daughter questions about her feelings and desires rather than directly criticizing the boyfriend. They emphasize the importance of supporting the daughter and being a sounding board rather than intervening aggressively.
Cheryl Strayed highlights that denial is a powerful force that often prevents people from recognizing their own troubles. She shares her own experience of being in denial about her heroin use and how an intervention helped her see the reality of her situation.
This episode was originally published on August 12th, 2017.
When we decide to meddle, it can often backfire. The Sugars, along with the writer Meghan Daum, answer letters from people who see loved ones heading down the wrong path, but worry intervention might be the wrong move.