end overthinking now
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Hello and welcome to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things self-love, spirituality, and personal growth. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a three-time author, content creator, avid traveler, entrepreneur, and matcha enthusiast. You are at the right place if you're ready to rediscover the love within, align with your purpose, and unleash your highest potential. It's time to claim your power.

hi guys welcome back to the podcast i have to say that i refilmed this intro like four different times because it hit me like i had this moment where i realized that i'm talking to myself i don't even know how to explain it because most of the time when i'm podcasting i genuinely feel like i'm talking to somebody else and then it hit me no kim you are sitting in your room right now speaking to yourself

So I just had like a little moment and I had to, you know, process that for a sec and then re-click record. But I am here, baby. Welcome back to the podcast. I hope you're having a fabulous day so far. I'd love to ask you to subscribe to the show if you're new and to leave a review because it really helps your girl out. And make sure to follow us on Instagram at claimyourpowerpod and at my personal account at Kim Peretz to receive more content, more reels, more inspiration.

inspiration. I also wanted to share with you guys something that I feel like I don't talk about that much, but some of you guys already know about it. I feel like it's like a little secret, but it's not supposed to be a secret. I just don't really talk about it. And that's that I have a free email list. So each week, something you need to know about me is that I love writing. I have always loved writing. It's one of my powers. It's one of my passions. And

And so I have a weekly email list where basically each week it's completely free and I send you like a little email from me in your inbox every single Monday with like inspiration, with an Oracle deck reading, with any messages that came up for me, with wellness tips, with all the updates on the new podcast episodes, any events that I'm doing. So it's a really fun way to connect with me.

So if you're someone who wants to hear from me every single week, you want a little spurs of inspiration and motivation in your inbox every single week, I will leave the link to join and subscribe to the email list. Again, it's completely free. I just feel like I don't talk about it that much and it's just such an amazing resource that I don't want you guys to miss out on.

So I'll leave it all in the episode notes, but without further ado, let's dive into today's episode. So for today's episode, I want to talk to you about overthinking because let me tell you something. If you are a spiritual girly,

I can bet a lot of money that you're probably very empathetic and what a lot of us empaths struggle with is overthinking, overanalyzing, going down the rabbit hole. And this is something that I struggled with for a long time being an overthinker. I would overanalyze and overthink so many small mundane situations in my life until I decided to make a shift, until I decided to claim back my power, ha ha ha,

And obviously I'm human. I still have days where I'm overthinking, but I used to be such a big overthinker. Like it would consume me and

And I had done so much inner work, so much research on the brain and the mind to really understand what overthinking is for like the highly sensitive people, aka empaths, aka most spiritual girlies. And so in today's episode, I want to share with you all the wisdom that I've learned that really helped me transform from being an overthinker to someone that's more of in this detachment era, someone that's able to accept

accept and surrender and really be present. So today I'm going to be sharing with you all of my tips, all of my mindset shifts that you need in order to end your overthinking patterns and to align with a version of yourself that has more trust,

more faith in herself, and is able to accept situations without the needing to overanalyze, overthink, and constantly go down a loophole. So I believe that there are three main objectives where overthinking stems from.

And we're going to get into each one of those and I really invite you to ask yourself which one do you align with most because it's really going to help you understand and grasp this side of you and being able to shift that pattern and release the need to overthink and constantly overanalyze. So the three main objectives are the first one being your inability to be present in the moment.

The second one is the need to constantly control. And the third one is an unstable emotional state. So we're going to get into each one of these and how you're going to be able to shift your mindset and heal them from the root. And these three objectives all coincide and all connect to each other. So once you understand each one of them and how to shift them,

You just won't have like your mind and your body and your soul won't have this need to overthink all the time because you'll be able to grasp and understand yourself on a deeper emotional level. So let's start off with the first objective and that is one's inability to be in the present moment.

So let's talk about it because the first thing that you really need to realize, and this is like such an aha moment when I actually was watching a reel a couple years ago of this monk that he was talking about this concept. And this is the notion and the idea that the past and the future only exist in the realm of your mind.

Let me say that again. The past and the future only exist in the realm of your mind. So technically, every single time you're thinking about the past and you're thinking about the future, you're being incredibly delusional because the past and the future do not exist. The only moment that exists is now. This moment that you're listening to the podcast, that you're being present. This is the only moment that exists.

And one of the most freeing and liberating thing that you can realize as an overthinker is that actually no amount of guilt is going to change the past and no amount of anxiety can change your future. So your inability to be in the present moment, to be here in the now is what's keeping you in this miserable loop.

And this is why practicing the art of surrendering is incredibly key and pivotal to releasing the need to constantly overthink. Because we live in a world right now with constant stimulation.

Everything around us is constantly trying to pull us out of the present moment. Social media, the news, the radio, advertisers, other people. We are constantly living in this world that's keeping us overstimulated and taking us out of the present moment.

And this is why techniques, for instance, like meditation, are not only a suggestion for someone that's an overthinker, but it's actually key. So once I started meditating every day, even if it's like three minutes where I just close my eyes and I disconnect and I just breathe and I sit in my body for a second and I step back,

my life changed because I started to become the observer of my thoughts and not the consumer. You are not your thoughts. You are the one experiencing them. And once you realize this, you will also understand that your overthinking doesn't actually mean that it's true. Like not every single thought that you think in your head is true. A lot of our thoughts are actually made up

Of things that people in the past told us, of things we would hear as a child, of past experiences, past assumptions, other people's limiting beliefs. I mean, you wouldn't even know, like half of your thoughts aren't even yours. They're just programming from the way that you were raised or the way that you've experienced your life.

And so one of the biggest things that you need to realize is an overthinker. And honestly, let's not even label things. Like don't even label yourself as an overthinker because I know I just, I'm like referring to it as an overthinker just to understand the message. But I think it's really important to actually detach yourself from that label

And to not be like, oh yeah, I'm constantly an overthinker. And like, don't let that be part of your personality trait. Because if we want to actually heal that and step away from that, we actually have to tell ourselves a new narrative and a new story. And that is that your thoughts are here to serve you and you use your thoughts as a way to create your dream life. And so don't even align with the frequency of being an overthinker anymore. Like after this episode,

Don't call yourself an overthinker. Don't label yourself as an overthinker. Label yourself as a queen, the queen, the princess that you are. And you are in the process of stepping away from that pattern and entering a new pattern.

Now, if you're a very highly sensitive person like me, then overthinking just comes with your nature. You just feel a lot more deeply. This allows you to experience joy on a more heightened level, pain on a more heightened level. And this is what I find with a lot of spiritual people and a lot of empaths is we are highly sensitive people and that is why we have this tendency to overthink because we feel so deeply that we try to look for logic and rationality to explain how deeply we feel.

And I find that with overthinking, our minds is going to work overtime, but it's actually super crucial to come back into your body and into your feeling state as an overthinker. And that's going to help you step away from that. So for instance, if you find yourself, something happened at work or with a friend, you find yourself going down this rabbit hole, overthinking it, overanalyzing it.

you're not going to be able to think your way out of that situation. You're going to have to feel your way out of it. Realize that overthinking is the most unproductive and unuseful thing you can do. And what would be most productive for you in that moment, and instead of sitting and wallowing and letting your mind consume you, it's actually having a little bit of self-discipline, getting up, taking yourself on a walk, breathing, moving your body,

Movement is key and allowing the thoughts to dissipate and evaporate through you. So don't try to numb those thoughts like by scrolling social media or by just sitting and overanalyzing and going down these loopholes in your head.

And instead be able to create a new neuropathway in that moment and cut the cord for a second and step back. And this is something that you're going to have to actively practice in your life and be very intentional until it becomes a habit for you. Because if you're used to overthinking all of your life, then it's not going to be like you wake up tomorrow and just ta-da!

I'm not overthinking anymore. No, it's something that you're going to have to practice with yourself time and time again. But the more that you have self-discipline and the more that you stay consistent and the more that you detach yourself from your thoughts, this is one of the key things that you need to realize about overthinking is that you are not your thoughts. Stop identifying with your thoughts and let your higher self become the observer.

Let your ego speak. Let your ego conversations, do the banter, rant, everything that it needs. I even suggest giving like your mind and your ego a nickname. Like mine is called Helga. I don't know why I'm telling you guys this, but every single time Helga comes out and Helga is the side of me that's overthinking, that's overanalyzing, that has a lot of doubt. I let Helga speak. I give her the pedestal and the stage, go off Helga. And then I'm like, shut up Helga.

So I really recommend giving yourself an alter ego. The part of you that likes to talk and overanalyze and overthink, give that a different name so that you detach yourself from that part of yourself as a constant reminder that it is not you, you are observing it.

You, your soul is observing it. You are a soul having a human experience, but in that moment, your ego is taking up. Overthinking always stems from the ego. The soul and the higher self knows so deeply how loved they are, how guided they are, how protected and abundant they are, that

any single time that you're overthinking and overanalyzing, that's how you know it's not your soul, it's not your intuition whispering, it's your ego. That's why giving it a name and alter ego is super beneficial. Like make it funny, make a joke out of it, give it a weird name. Okay, let's move on to the second objective of overthinking and

and that is the constant need to control. This often stems from childhood where there were situations where you couldn't control other people's reactions or other people's behaviors. And so as women, a lot of the time we develop this defense mechanism that we need to control everything, we need to mother everyone, we need to understand everything, we need to know everything. And so this way nothing goes wrong if we have control and we're all

constantly holding on to the grip. But this is the most disempowering thing that you can do for yourself because the more you try to hold on to something, the less free that you become and the more you cage yourself in. This doesn't just even apply to thoughts, like this just applies to life in general. But if you want to step away from this tendency to overthink, you're going to have to practice easing your grip on what you can't control.

And I know that this sounds a lot easier said than done, and it is. But I promise you that no amount of holding on, overthinking, analyzing, worrying, doubting will bring you closer to where you want to go. And in life, we're not responsible for other people. We're not responsible for other people's words, inadequate actions, behavior. The only thing that we are responsible for is our attitude, our mindset, and ourselves.

So this is something that I find also a lot that connects to happiness is a lot of women that feel the need to control everything are also some of the unhappiest women that I know. And the reason that I know this is because that was me four years ago. I was incredibly unhappy. It's because I was trying to control everything, control the circumstances, control the outcome, control other people's behaviors. And it's a rabbit hole you'll never get off. Like it's a blocked wall because you can't control other people and you can't control most things in your life.

You can dream, you can set intentions, you can decide what is good for you. But at the end of the day, we live in a very not only physical world, but a spiritual world. And we don't understand everything and we don't have a grasp of everything that's going on. The more that we try to control other things outside of us, the more that we are at mercy of being unhappy.

And if your happiness is dependent on things you can't control, like other people's actions, words, the way other people treat you, you'll never truly be happy. You'll constantly be overthinking. You'll constantly be overanalyzing because you're going to constantly give your power away to things outside of you. And so...

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Because a lot of the time what overthinking is, is overthinking and overanalyzing things that you cannot control. I.e. your past, your future, other people's words, how other people think of you, how other people see you, other people's behaviors. It's always things outside of you that is what leads us to overthinking. And when you ease your grip on that and you realize, you know what?

My peace is more important now.

And I'm going to start focusing on the things that I can control, like my self-talk, my response, my attitude, my boundaries. And you're going to put your energy into that place. Because the truth is, the more that you try to control something, the more it controls you. You need to start being able to say, my peace is more important. My peace is more important. And something that's really helped me shift from overthinking is developing the mindset of what if it doesn't work out to what if it does.

What our minds tend to do a lot when it comes to overthinking is we think of the worst case scenario. But that's just as delusional of thinking that things are going to work out. We always think of the worst case, this person feels this way because I did this one thing or this didn't work out because I'm not worthy and you're just like going down this rabbit hole and at the end of the day, you're just being delusional.

Because you don't actually know if it's going to work out if it doesn't. So you might as well put your energy and your focus on what if it does. So instead of thinking what if it doesn't work out, think how can I fill up my own cup and what if I have faith and believe that it does. And this is where self-discipline is incredibly pivotal when it comes to healing overthinking.

The most disciplined people in life are the ones that are most free. And the undisciplined are a constant slave to their emotions and to other people. So,

So you really need to start having self-discipline. If it's really important for you to not be an overthinker anymore and you want to set yourself free, you're going to have to have self-discipline on this journey of healing this. And something that I really, really highly recommend, and this is something that I did as I was healing my tendency to overthink, and sometimes I still do it because of course I'm human and I still overthink sometimes as a highly sensitive person, is

but it's actually doing a pattern interrupt. And this interrupts the neurotransmitters in your brain in that moment and allows you to kind of step away from that thought. And the way that you do pattern interrupts is you move physically. So you can get up, shake your ass. But if you don't want to do that, something that I love to do is either snap or clap

or if you're walking on the street and you have this negative thought that you're overthinking, literally like stomp one of your feet on the ground. Just do something physical that interrupts the pattern in your brain in that moment. And then you're going to do this cognitive therapy by asking yourself a question. So for example, let's say I had a situation with a friend and...

And I felt like they weren't being as consistent with me. So I started to overthink and think maybe I did something wrong or maybe they're going through something and just going down this loophole. Then an amazing way to cut out that thought in that moment is to clap, snap, stomp, and then ask myself, is this a productive thought? Is this thought based on facts or assumptions? How much will this thought matter in five years?

This is the dialogue that you need to start having with yourself. When you notice a negative thought, at first you're not going to notice it, but then the more that you meditate and you practice breath work and observing the thoughts, the faster you'll be actually catching yourself going down that overthinking loop and getting yourself out of it faster. Do the pattern interrupt and then ask yourself, is this a productive thought? Is this based on facts or assumptions? And how much will it matter in five years? When you start asking yourself these questions in the moment, your brain will start looking for answers.

And when your brain will start looking for answers, you'll be disconnected from that overthinking pattern. Because most of the time, it's an assumption. It's probably not a fact. Most of the time, it's not a productive thought if we're going down the rabbit hole of overthinking. And most of the time, it's not going to matter in five years. Are there certain situations where maybe this doesn't apply to it? Yes, 100%.

But doing the pattern interrupts is a super helpful way to actually start healing the overthinking. It's to physically interrupt your brain in that moment and to start asking yourself questions because when you ask specific questions, your mind focuses on finding the answers rather than spiraling into endless loops of unproductive thoughts. And this shift in focus can help you break the cycle of overthinking. And the last objective that I want to talk about today is your emotional state.

So something that you need to realize about your thoughts is that your thoughts are simply mental events that pop up in your mind depending on your mood.

So this is why in order to stop overthinking and to heal your mental state, you need to actually take a deep look at your emotions because your emotions are chemical residue and that impacts your heart health, your hormones, your nervous system, your joy. And when we actually start looking at our emotional state, we're actually going to be healing ourself from a very deep level.

So in order to do this, in order to actually level up your emotional state and end your overthinking tendencies, is you need to start to understand your hormones better so that you can take better actions to rewire your brain's neurotransmitters. So in this next part of the episode, I'm going to talk to you about...

four hormones, the feel-good hormones, that you need to know about to understand what they are and how you can regulate them in your life because hormone health equals mood regulation and mood regulation equals a more positive mindset.

When we're in a more emotionally stable place, we're able to assess our thoughts better. When we're codependent, when we're emotionally unstable, when we depend on other people to make us feel good all the time and for our emotions, then our mindset isn't stable. It can come and go. And our happiness and our joy and our peace is dependent on external factors.

This is why healing your hormones is actually incredibly important to also healing your emotional state and your mental state. So let's talk about the hormones. So the first hormone you need to know about is dopamine. This is the feel-good hormone. It's the motivation hormone. It's what gets us going, gets us motivated to do tasks, to go out there.

And when that dopamine is not balanced, we get lazy. We don't feel as good. And this is why having real dopamine in our life is actually so important because what happens to a lot of people now is we get fake dopamine.

This is because of the technology in the social media world. A lot of our dopamine is not real dopamine. And this is why actually incorporating real dopamine in your life will actually change your mindset. And so the way that you increase your dopamine in your life is through meditation, it's through exercise, and it's through following your creative streak.

Emphasis on the creativity because it is so important to be in a way like a child and to constantly follow your creativity. When you are someone that has passion and creativity and you're going after that, your happiness just goes up. Your mental state just goes up.

and you become a very powerful woman. So please do not sleep on your creative endeavors. If you used to like to paint as a kid, start painting again. If you like to create artwork or design websites or create content or cook

cook or blog, whatever it may be, please do not give up on it. Find a way to make this time for yourself every single week so that you don't abandon yourself. Your body and your mind will thank you for it and your soul will thank you for it. So start doing things that make you feel good and also exercise is incredibly important. Exercise

is something that is actually vital to your health. It's not a suggestion. Our bodies, whether we like it or not, they were created to move, not to stay stagnant. Think about our old ancestors. They would walk miles and miles to reach new places. They were constantly moving our bodies. Exercise is not a suggestion. It's something that is incredibly pivotal and vital to you.

I don't have any specific requirements. Like you don't have to be like, you have to exercise five times a week and do this exact exercise. None of that. But find what exercise lights you up, how sweating and moving your body, what it is for you and do it and stick to it and commit to it because it's so, so, so important. Even if it's going on hot girl walks every single day and just walking and moving your body, that's just as good. But move your body, let your body be in motion. It's incredibly important.

Okay, second hormone that I want to talk about is serotonin. And serotonin is the mood stabilizer. And when we don't have enough proper serotonin in our life, that's when our mood shrinks. That's when our emotional state gets unstable. That's why it's so important to learn how to balance your serotonin levels.

The way that I really suggest doing that is through nature. It's by getting proper sunshine, vitamin D, grounding outside, breathing the fresh air. And if you live somewhere cold where that doesn't really, there's not a lot of sunshine, you can't really go outside even though it's summer right now. Well, actually for the other side of the equator, it isn't. But

But you know what I'm saying, if you don't really have that option or that privilege, 'cause I do know some of you guys live in very cold countries, then another way you can boost your serotonin levels is by practicing gratitude. So having a journal and practicing your thanks and what you're grateful for every single day is incredibly powerful for your serotonin hormone and will also elevate your mood, it will elevate your emotional state, which in turn will elevate your positive mindset. And I really recommend doing the gratitude

either in the morning or right before you go to sleep. Okay, next hormone we're talking about is endorphins. And the endorphin hormone is basically like your pain relief hormone. And the best way to activate your endorphin is through laughing.

So laugh whenever you can. Like laughter really is the best medicine. I personally love laughing. It's just my favorite thing in the world. Find reasons to laugh, whether that be watching a funny show or catching up with a friend and just focusing on like funny stories from the past. Look for ways to laugh, to giggle, to bring that joy into your life. There's actually studies that found that it's impossible for you to be angry and laugh at the same time.

anger and laughing are mutually exclusive. So if you focus on laughing and having more joy and laughter in your life, it is virtually impossible for your mind to go down the overthinking loop and the anger and all of those negative emotional states because your energy is just vibrating so much higher. So look for ways to increase those endorphins by laughing, watching a funny show. Like I love watching Friends. I...

I love Friends and I love Netflix. Like you will never hear it out of me being like, don't watch Netflix. It's fake dopamine. No, no, no. I'm a Netflix queen. I'm not going to lie. Sometimes the coziest and most fulfilling thing I can do and I want to do before I go to bed is not journal and do shadow work. It's watching an episode of Friends and having a good laugh. So do it too. Find the show that makes you laugh, that makes you just disconnect and just enjoy yourself and add that into your life.

And the last hormone that I wanna talk about that will help you with overthinking and your emotional state is oxytocin. This is the love hormone. This is the hormone that women release after being intimate with a guy, which we're not gonna get into that side of it today, but if you guys are interested

that side of things and I can definitely also talk about that in a future episode but oxytocin the love hormone the way that you increase more oxytocin in your life you actually don't need a relationship to do that you can do that for yourself by listening to music that makes you really happy or by hugging someone so it doesn't have to be a romantic partner it could be hugging a child a friend a family member even hugging yourself it

will increase your oxytocin levels, which will increase the frequency of love in your life, which will in turn heal and level up your emotional states. Last thing that I wanted to mention for the emotional regulation section is to also come back to the basics. Like it is so crucial and important to get adequate sleep.

to eat properly, to move your body. All of these things are so important for brain function and when our brain functions better, our mood is better and our mindset is better. So,

So I just want to remind you and leave you with the reminder that 98% of your problems would be solved if you stopped overthinking and you actually allowed yourself to exist and truly believe that what's meant for you will always be yours and what's meant to be will be. Because a lot of time when we overthink, we're actually disconnecting from our faith and

in the universe and our faith in the divine and from our trust and our guidance. And so the best way that I want to leave you off for this episode is the more that you overthink, the more you disconnect from your higher self and the more that you surrender and you become the observer and you focus on your true belief, knowing that what's meant for you won't pass you by and that your thoughts are not facts, the better that your life will get.

Beautiful souls, thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. As always, I will talk to you next week. Bye!