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Okay, hi guys. My name is Shannon Beveridge. I'm the host of X's and O's, a podcast where we talk about queer relationships and sex, and I'm doing my intro twice because that's how I do this, and I don't know why that's how I do it, but that's how we're doing it. Anyway, today's intro, like beginning part of the podcast, is going to be short because me and Vanessa filmed a long time, and I have to edit it, and so I'm going to just do a quick
mental health check-in with you guys at the beginning of the pod to say things just feel better. I'm feeling a lot better. Life is feeling good. I'm so happy Vanessa's here. I'm definitely like in host mode because...
Whenever someone's like in town, I feel like that's really all I'm focused on. But I'm so happy she's here and it's so fun. If you don't know, then I should just tell you Vanessa is my friend from Canada. She's the guest on today's episode. We've been friends for 10 plus years, which I think we're about to say to you again in the episode. But I'm so happy she's here and hanging with me. And yeah, definitely feel like things are getting back on track.
And yeah, I don't know. I'm less stressed than I was three weeks ago, which is so nice. And I think it will hopefully continue to get better. You never know. Obviously, things change and life happens, but...
I feel like my feet are on the ground, which is a great, great feeling. And if you're somewhere feeling like how I was feeling at the beginning of February, sending you all my love. It will get better. It does get better. It always does. And I need to remember that every time I'm like feeling that low because it always does get better. Anyway, I hope you guys have...
I hope you have a great week. I hope you've had a great beginning half of your week. I hope the end half of the week is also amazing. I hope you have a great weekend. I love you. All right. Enjoy the podcast. I'm waving, but it's a podcast, so there's no point in that. But okay, bye. What the fuck? Okay.
Are you ready? I think I'm ready. Let's do it. Okay, hi guys. My name is Shannon Beveridge. I'm the host of X's and O's, a podcast where we talk about queer relationships and sex.
And today I have a very special guest, my very best friend, Vanessa Webster from all the way from Toronto. Special, special guest. And yeah, Vanessa is my first gay friend. We've been friends for over 10 years and we met on Tumblr, which is kind of where all the lesbians once lived. Yep. And now it's kind of dead.
tumblr doesn't exist really the same way it's not the same as what it was but that is depressing it's so depressing it's sad it's sad but you know we needed to get offline a little bit more than we were when we became friends we were chronically online i know but i still loved it like yeah i know but and then we became gay in real life that's what happened which is sometimes harder it is way harder than being gay online being gay online could have done that all all for the rest of my life
But then we had to come out. We did. And here we are. Speaking of coming out, do you want to? I didn't have like a crazy coming out story. So there's not too much to share. Yeah. With that. Should we talk about how you're a free lover? No. I hate this already. I don't know why I'm here right now. Oh my God. I'm joking. I'm joking. I like all people. Yeah. Yeah. But you're probably usually date women. I won't.
I only like women. But I love all people. So it's like you never know. Yeah, I agree. Putting, what's it called? A label on it? A label on something's too difficult for me. Because then I'll just think about it. Yeah, it's okay. You don't need it. But she's been dating the same girl for eight years now. Almost eight years. That's wild. I love her. Amy, we love you. She's my forever girl.
I love her. Okay, I'm crying. That's so nice. How about you? How about me? Yeah, how's your love life? We figured it out. We are figuring it out. You stress me out. Me? Yeah. Really? Sometimes. What about? I don't know. I stress myself out, but my dating life...
It's a lot, right? No one would disagree, I think. Yeah, there's been a lot that's happened. Yeah. For sure. The internet part of my like dating life is not fun. No. I mean, it's very entertaining, but at my expense. It's hard to even believe that it's real. Like I'm like, is it fake? Are you putting on a show? Like tell me the truth. Do I know about it? Do I know everything? You know the truth. I don't know. You know the whole truth. It's a lot, but you're doing great.
You're doing great. Thank you. Anyway, last night we were here hanging out too with our friend Shannon, who's also from Toronto. She's like my emotional support anxiety dog. Like she's here always. I'm basically just obsessed with Shannon's. Yeah, as you should be. If your name is Shannon, I will love you. We were all reminiscing on our Tumblr days and joking about how, well, it's crazy. Like I basically made Tumblr. I just turned the whole thing into like my career.
Which I don't think any of us thought that that was possible. Like when we were online, I don't think any of us were like, this could be our job one day. No, there also wasn't any kind of monetize...
monetization monetization within tumblr at the time i don't know what it's like now but like there wasn't even on youtube yet yeah you basically built like a cult for yourself okay wrong word we're gonna have a lot anyway tumblr if you don't know was a blogging site uh kind of similar to pinterest but also we all were like talking to each other and like
doing tiny chats and skyping all the time and we were all friends from all over the world so I was in Dallas and Oklahoma at the time when I met Vanessa. Vanessa was in Toronto and I was like this is my best friend so we're gonna have to hang out. We kept it together with the festivals. Yeah Bonnaroo we all would meet up at Bonnaroo every year. Like 50 lesbians 100 lesbians.
Everyone from Tumble. Talk about stressful. Crazy. A lot happened at those. It was so fun. It was so fun. Sometimes. Whoa. No, it was so fun. It was so fun. Who hurt you? But it is crazy that we've stayed friends all these years and we've never lived in the same country. I do love you. I love you so much. It feels easy to be your friend.
That's so nice. It feels easy to be your friend too. I think it's because what we were saying earlier too, that we have the same kind of special interests. And Vanessa is a really amazing photographer. And honestly, you taught me a lot about what I know about photography and got me into film. You're good at editing though. You're good at video. No, video. Oh, okay. I'm like, you're good at editing.
I like stills you like video. Yeah, and it's cool to see but we have the same interest We're both very into like creative things and I think that keeps us friends too long distance because we're constantly like what do you think about this? Also, vanessa has a clothing company called still saying that she hasn't made anything in a while But when I asked you guys for questions for her a bunch of people were like can you make something? It was early to bring that up. I didn't know that was coming right now. That just made me nervous. I
A win would be a good time. I don't know. I think that's a problem still with the brand right now. I'm like, do you guys like it? Do you want it? They do like it. I think we should collab. Yeah. What do you guys think? If you guys want to see it, we'll collab on something. You guys, I'm not gonna lie. I'm really nervous right now. Why are you nervous though? I'm nervous. I don't know. I feel like I don't do a lot of social media stuff anymore. So this feels like weird for me. Yeah. This feels weird for me. Okay. Well, I'm so happy that you're here. I'm proud of you. Thank you.
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Vanessa and I've made like a million YouTube videos together. I really exploited myself online for many, many years. All the time. But now I feel like an everyday person that's like, oh, that's crazy. How do you do that? How do you feel comfortable? You did it for so long. I know. That's what I'm saying. I'm like, something changed. Yeah. What changed? I hurt myself.
It's not funny. We laugh about it, but it's not funny. I feel like we're going to talk about it and it's going to come off insensitive again. We try to tell the story in real life. Yeah. Yeah, because it's actually serious. It was scary. It was scary. And when we talk about serious things, it comes off really bad. Anyway, this is not lighthearted, but I'm sure we're going to keep joking about it. Yeah, we will have to. But Vanessa had a seizure. A little head injury. She had a seizure and then a head injury.
A few years ago, which I don't think the internet ever knew because why would they? Because I left. Yeah. I didn't share anything. She kind of disappeared. Within that long distance friendship, I didn't know how serious it was. And I was getting texts and like calls from some Canada friends being like, Vanessa is not herself right now. And I was like, I'm sure she's fine. And then...
I invited her to DC Pride with me. Also, I thought I was fine in the moments. Like, I knew I had problems, but I didn't know that friends and family were, like, reaching out to Shannon being like, hey, we need help. Like, something's going on. I just thought, I was like, surely this is going to be fine. Anyway, we went to DC Pride together. Vanessa shows up. And then I was like, uh...
Oh, okay. Got it. You were also stressed out in that moment too. Anyway, could you tell the story? Because I feel like we're not exactly expecting. I wish I could. That was a problem all that time. You didn't know. I don't know. No, I fell, hit my head, a bit of a seizure. Seizure before I fell, hit my head. And then, I don't know, I just started off all these like personality differences and...
The really the one who had to deal with it the most was my girlfriend, my partner, who God bless her. She is amazing. Oh, my God. I don't know who I'd be without her. But yeah, she was the best. I keep cracking my tail. I'm sorry. It's so gross. Sorry. Okay, sorry. Yeah, I just had all these problems, like neuro type stuff.
My eyes were being weird. They were really bothering me. And I think that took a lot away from my whole character since I love photography. And like I had all these goals set for myself, but I went loopy. Well, you couldn't see. In the nicest way. Yeah. I had like tracking issues. You couldn't focus your eyes. Yeah. And then you're trying to be a photographer and you can't see properly. Yeah. And then you weren't talking about any of it online, which obviously is not everyone talks about everything online the way I do. But I feel like you did. But.
But I do feel like we like if you were someone who had followed you, it just kind of seemed like you like just left you guys just left the Internet. I'm like, bye. But that's not the truth.
And now you are back to like yourself, I feel. Do you feel? I really do. Do you feel? Yeah, okay. No, genuinely. Yeah, I feel so much better now. Yeah. I truly do. I feel like it's time to dip your toes back into... I'm not like... I want to be online, but I'm also like...
I don't even know how I have followers still. Like, I feel like I really tested it out for a minute. I'm like, how many can I lose? Like, who will stay around? I don't know. That's how I feel. Well, yeah, the ones you have left are, like, genuine. And so many still have. And I'm like, what? What do you want from me now? Like, what can I post? What do you like? Yeah. I know. It's like 50-50, though, when I think of having followers. I'm not posting, like, what I want to post. I want to post what you want to see at the same time, right? So, but.
But so what do you guys want to see? Yeah, but I do want to be back. I guess. Yeah, I guess. I want to do more things with you. I feel like. Yeah, me too. Comfortable. But again.
Your love of the internet is scary. No, it's not. No, it's not. It is, but... It is, but not our friendship has always been the best part of the internet for me. Oh my God. Oh my God. I would never have met you. I know. It's wild. Okay, I am really glad that you came on the podcast so you can talk about the head injury thing because it's not funny. It's not funny. I don't know why I have to say it and laugh. But...
But I think it's so good because I do feel like people missed you. I wonder like what would life be like right now if that didn't happen. Yeah. It's crazy. But it's okay. It happens for a reason. It sure does. I feel like it's such a good sign for you and Amy that you guys are like meant for each other. Because if you can go through something that difficult and get through the other side, like...
You're going to have to marry that girl. I have to. Of course. There's no better. I can't not. I want you to. I know. Me too.
She's going to love this. I hope she does. Or she'll be like, hey, stop talking about me. Talk about what you guys want to be working on or like. Okay, we already talked about work though too. Yeah. Anyway. Do you still like taking pictures or you are now leaning to video more? Like. I still like taking pictures. You've been doing your directing thing for a hot minute. I like taking pictures. I like.
I think I just have ADHD and I like to not have to do one thing. So I like to be like, oh, and now I'll take a picture and now I'll do a podcast and next month I will direct something again. I don't know. Yeah, you're always doing something. Well, I have to. I have to get
I'm bored. Yeah, but then that's me and I'm like playing with clay. Yeah. You know? I love a good hobby or craft. I get really sucked into it. Me too, though. It's so fun. I know I saw your watercolor paints over there. How's that going for you? It was fun. It was fun. I was making cards. Great material. Yeah, it's cute. I didn't even know you liked to paint.
I don't even know if I do, but I'm down to try anything once. I'd love to see your work. Okay. Can we talk about, can we talk about? Um, I don't, I never wanted to talk about this, but we can talk about it. People knew. Are we talking about the same thing? Uh,
When you were obsessed with me. But how would you say it? Because you got mad at me. We tried to film this yesterday and it went really poorly. And honestly, we had a rough start today, but I'm really trying. It's getting good. It's getting better, right? I hope so. You say it. Okay. Have you ever liked me? I don't like to. When we were friends, when we first met each other, we liked each other. Or at least we thought we did. Yeah. Then we met.
And we were like, we really like each other. We're obsessed with each other. But like, I don't want to kiss you. I don't know what it is. The math is not mapping romantically. But I was obsessed with you. Me too. I was like, I need to be around you forever. So we're going to have to not kiss ever again. Yeah.
Anyway, I think it was like, it is classic baby gays being like, I love you. It must be romantic love. I think you should love your, like, your close friends. Of course, but you don't need to have sex with them. And we didn't. We didn't. We literally made it past the peck. That was it. We were like, okay. For a second, I was like, I think I'm straight again. It's so wrong when you say that. I know. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. It really bothers you.
It's not nice. No, not about you. If I'm like, I'm straight. Oh, no, I don't care about that.
I don't care about that. I mean, it bothers me that you said you kissed me and then thought you were straight. No, no, that's the thing, though. Even we didn't even want to do the first kiss. How long did we hang out before we actually even kissed? You were. Days. Yeah. Yeah. And that's weird because if you like someone, you want to kiss them. Immediately. Immediately. No, we knew in our bodies. I know, but it's like, am I feeling this because I'm nervous? I'm like, am I nervous? That's why I don't want to do it. And I'm like, I don't know, but something doesn't feel right. Yeah. Yeah.
It's true. It didn't feel right. It did not feel right. Then we did it and we were trying to be so nice to each other about it. Yeah. And you gave a good sentence. I said I want you in my life. You wrote it down on a skateboard. On the back of a skateboard. Like a wall. It was a piece of art. Whatever. But... I think I want you in my life forever, I thought. It was Ness...
never loved another person like you. I want you... Something about, like, I want you in my life forever. Or I can't like you because I want you forever. Something like that. It was cute. It was very cute. And I was like, thank God. Because we cannot...
We can't try that again. No, we should not. The reaction of both of us to his sex. It's making me uncomfortable right now. Yeah, me too. I'm sweating. I hate it. When I said we didn't have sex, by the way, both of our reactions. Immediately. I don't even know what would happen. I don't even know what it would be like. It couldn't.
We couldn't even get past kissing. I'm like, no. Okay, let's move on. That's gross. Anyway, it was truly though. I think that happens to a lot of gay people when you first are coming out and you're like meet another gay person. You're like, I must like you because that's what gay people are supposed to do. But then we were like, wait. Also, remember my dad?
What? You like came the first time when we liked each other and you were allowed to stay in my room, whatever. Because I don't think they knew I was liking girls at the time. So they were comfortable with it. Then they knew. And my dad was like, she can't stay in your room. You came back for my birthday. And he was so adamant. He was like, no.
I slept on the couch for one night and then the next morning he shyly came back and was like, she can sleep in your room. Clearly because we were friends. We were being bros. We were besties then. Thank God. Thank God we got through that. My family loves you. And I love them. And we are family. Wait, what is your type? Because I'll tell you what. It's not me. We've learned.
You're a pretty person, though. You're very, like, pretty. A lot of people like your look a lot. I feel like you could have a straight man love you and also, like, the gayest, like, most femme girl or, like, not femme. I don't know. Every kind of type of a person likes you. That's really, that's so nice. Well, it's not nice. It's just, like, a comment. It's like a... You're like, I'm not being nice to you. Yeah. No, but everyone thinks... The guy at the bar the other night. He was gay. Yeah.
guy yeah that's what i'm saying every person every gender every type everyone loves you that's so or your look that's enough now okay anyway what is your type i'll start putting you down i feel like you know i feel like you're i feel like your type i'm gonna answer the question for you i do have it i think your type is girly but a little tomboy like amy because amy dress is cool but she also would wear like a dress yeah i feel like exactly your type
Yeah. Like if you're stylish, that's a cool. Yeah. But yeah, you like. I'm saying like you like. I like a pretty girl. Like I like. I don't feel super girly. So I feel like I love like a girl. Yeah. Like nice lips. Nice hair. Like I don't know. Like a girl. A girl. Yeah. But then also you can dress however you want because that doesn't mean anything. That's more of a like. But it's an energy thing. Yeah. Amy's energy is girlier than you. Like more feminine energy.
but then at the same time you're like oh my god you are also like a little me and you both are so girly little bitch yeah little bitches except we're not like tough in that way no we can't when you take a shower and you come out in your towel wrapped around like a little sarong of hips it's the girliest thing i've ever seen in my life i like don't even like wearing a bathing suit i won't go swimming
I don't even have like body. I don't have, I'm like myself, but I feel naked. I don't like it. Like, I don't like when my friends see me like that. I'm like, no, not for you. But I have like hips, I have boobs. I'm a girl.
I'm a girl. We are the same person when we talk about these things, except for I don't have hips and I do not have the absolute complete opposite bodies. We do not have the same body type now. No, no. Sometimes you'll try my pants on. They're tight. They'll look baggy on me. And then you put them on and they're like skin tight to your thighs. I'm bigger than you. Stuck to your thighs. Well, but you're also tiny. I'm bigger than you. You're really tiny. Relax. You are the smallest. I'm huge.
Do you think I'm stronger than you? No. But I feel like you would beat me in a fight because I'm more passive. I just mean like weight wise. Do you think I could like lift more than you or push more than you? No. I don't really work out, but I don't know. I feel like I could be stronger than you in a weird way. I know. I feel small, right? But for some reason, it's giving strength. I think we're the same probably. True. Similar. Similar.
I think you're smarter than me, but I feel like I might be stronger than you. You're smarter than me? Who was the first person, not like who's the first, what was the first moment you thought you were gay, but like the first person that you're like, oh my gosh, that person's so pretty. Like actress wise. Scarlett Johansson and I was obsessed with her for some reason. Interesting. That's weird. My brother loved her. Yeah. I don't think she's not. I think she's beautiful, but I never had that.
I don't even know. I like her voice. I didn't even know that I was. I rented every single movie she was in from Blockbuster. And then I was like, this is getting weird. Then I was like, wait. True. Yeah. But then it was South of Nowhere. And then it was Grey's Anatomy. I never watched that, which is crazy because I feel like that's like. It's not that good, but yay. But it's what you watch when you're figuring it out. You had to watch it. I was a big L Word fan. Who's your favorite character? From the L Word? Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen. Of course. Of course. Who's your favorite? Okay. Shane and Alice. Yeah. You like them? I like their friendship. They used to make me laugh. Like a lot. Have you watched their podcast they have together? No, but I should. Like them in real life, obviously. No, I would love that. Kate Boning and her. I would probably love it. Yeah. I need to get better with podcasts. I know. I need to watch theirs too. But...
I also loved the L word, but I could only download the sex scenes on LimeWire. What? Wait, do you remember LimeWire? You singly, you downloaded just the individual sex scenes? It was all that you could find on LimeWire. I would type in the L word and then it would be like, the L word season two, episode four, sex scene Shane and Carmen. What?
I don't know. I waited to see. Why wouldn't you just watch? Because it... Well, it would come on... It was on mega upload. We all know that. Wait 75 minutes to watch your next, like, hour. I didn't know where to watch it. I would watch it on Showtime when it would come out. And then once I saw it on Showtime, I was like...
I need to see every episode of this. I feel like a lot of people will really resonate with the wait 75 minutes before you can watch more. I don't even know what that is. I was obsessed. Yeah, you could watch maybe like an hour, maybe almost an episode and then it'd make you wait.
And you could watch all seasons. Okay. This is what, when I was in high school. We weren't friends yet, yeah. No, I know. No, I was out here. I broke my family computer downloading the L word. You want to hear something funny? Yeah.
- Please. - I'm Spanish. So my mom, obviously I don't like dresses and the whole thing, right? So I was supposed to have a quinceanera. No, I was supposed to have a quinceanera and I didn't want one, obviously, 'cause I don't wanna slow dance with my dad in a dress. That's nerve wracking for me, right? - Yeah, terrible. - So my dad also hates family stuff. So he was like, "Hey, do you want a quinceanera "or do you want a laptop?" And I was in grade 10 being like,
Oh, tough call. What do I pick? My mom's like, you'll get enough money from your quinceanera to buy yourself a laptop and then more. Like, she just wanted me to dress up and have the moment. I respect, like, you have to. I chose a laptop. Everything...
I'm here now because that laptop. I'm so serious. And I'm alive today because I got that laptop. So I didn't ruin my family computer. I ruined my own laptop probably. Well, I ruined my family computer that was in my stepsister's bedroom. So I used to have to lock her out of the room. You have a lot of steps. I've had a few. Yeah. I have. Yeah, I've had a few. That's cool. Can we talk about your braid? Oh, yeah.
I still, to this day, don't know what to do with my hair. I don't know what to do with hair. Because my whole life, the only thing I did with my hair was have a braid. You were the braid girl. It was down to my bum. Every day, one braid. It would be like the end of the school year and everyone would be like, take your braid out! Take your braid out! And I would just take it out and they'd be like, no! We've never seen it! It was crazy. That is like the gayest experience ever. And then I cut it, donated it. That was what, grade 10, I think? Yeah.
And then did not know how to do my hair. And now? Do not know how to do my hair. You just recently did this, though. How do you feel about it? It's short. Is it easier to work with or harder? You've had it all. You've had like ombre. What's it called? It's definitely easier if I wear a hat.
that's why but with no hat though people keep coming for me in the hat and they're like are you going to take your hat off for one of the podcast episodes and i'm like if i don't have a hat on and i'm filming myself i'm gonna think about what my hair looks like the whole time yeah us yesterday and especially with the podcast because i'm not looking at the camera i'm talking to you yeah so i don't know yeah yesterday we tried to film this podcast
and we both were like let's not wear a hat 20 minutes in we're like the whole time i was like i feel hot i hate this right now i'm like are the lights too bright i don't know it's because there's no brim i'm like something feels off we shut it down that quick i also feel like the lights are so fucking bright that's all it is sorry to come back the lights are so bright i want to look in front of me but the lights are right just look at me
It's even brighter. Oh my god. A hat. All we needed was a hat. People get dogs for anxiety. I have a hat for anxiety. Same. It works. But I go through phases with everything. Even like this. I know. I'm sure in like two months, I won't be wanting to wear a hat all the time. Like it just, it like fluctuates. Or the hat will change. Like sometimes I'm in like a baseball hat era and I'll love to wear a baseball hat. And then like right now, I don't like the way the baseball hat looks on me.
This is not a baseball hat. If you're watching, then you can see. I would call...
What do you call this hat? Five panel. No, six. Six. Whatever. Not a baseball hat. The baseball hats are like the 47 brand. Yeah, I can't wear those. My head's so small. Your head is small. Your head is small. It's really small. You look good in a hat, though. I like when you wear a hat. Thanks, Ness. I like when you wear a hat. Thanks. I don't know how not to wear a hat. Me neither right now. I never wear beanies anymore, though. That's crazy. I know. Why? I don't know.
It's a phase, but you'll get back into it. No, but before I used to, no, before it was easier. Now I'm like, it just doesn't feel right. Is it from the head trauma? Yeah. I'm so serious. Okay. Like this feels good. The beanie always feels like, remember before I would wear it like falling off my head and it would stay? You would wear it and it would look like, you know, those things that you could get at like Chuck E. Cheese and you'd flip them and you'd lay them on the table and it popped.
Yeah. That's what your beanies look like on your head. I know. And it felt good and it fit and it wouldn't fall. Now I go to do that and I'm like, what the fuck is going on? I hope I have my beanie era again sometime. It's crazy how much this head trauma... Head traumas are very serious. Very serious. If there's a podcast on head traumas, I would listen to every episode. There definitely is. I'm sure. I just don't adventure. I should. There was a guy in my college who...
He was in a frat and this other frat came to their house, knocked on the door, and he came outside and they pushed him and he hit his head and it literally changed his personality. Yeah. Different guy after that. But you're... I'm back. Yeah. I'm back. I hope I'm back. The confidence is like zero. No, I feel like I'm back. Yeah, you are. I don't know if I'm back for this, but I'm back. You're back. Yeah. Thank you. I love you. I love you too. I also think it's so funny though when I flew out to see you.
When we went to the DC Pride and you were like, oh my god, that was so not good. In my head, it was the first time I saw you in so long. So I was like, I feel great. I feel great. Yeah. I felt better after that. Yeah. We don't have to get into it. That's crazy. There's nothing to get into. Well, just this thing and...
Okay, we were supposed to be at DC Pride. We're jumping all over the place. We were supposed to be at DC Pride on a float. And Vanessa took a shower and I was like, you have to get out of the shower now. She took like an hour and a half long shower. And then she gets out of the shower and she's like, I can't even explain though. That was the best shower of my life because if I go like this with my eyes, so she like would rest her finger in between her nose, in between her eyes. She's like...
If I go like this with my finger, my eyes are focused and I can see. But then she was talking like a mile a minute. And I was like, I don't know what you're talking about. I love you so much. We have to go. Soaking wet, walking around the hotel room, telling me the same story over and over. That freaks me out to hear it because in the moment, I didn't feel like that. I also don't remember that moment. So crazy. Yeah, it was a time.
But then, yeah, we had a great day. One of my memories from DC Pride was just hopping on the back of a Lime scooter with you and just ripping through. We had fun still. It was fun. It was still fun. It was just there were things...
I think there were just moments where I was like, this... You wouldn't normally do that. It was the first time, yeah. It was the first time you saw. Anyway, you are definitely back. You feel so much more like yourself. Okay, wait. I'm looking at these cards now. I hate these games. Have you ever had successful casual sex? What made it work? Have you? Never. Me either. I know. Oh, my God. I don't think I have. That's not true. I'm not that good at doing anything casually. That's what I was going to say. Anything. So...
Amy and I have been casual for eight years. Anyone before I also fully dated. So there is nothing casual. Give this card to the person who makes you question your sexuality. Stop. Am I straight? What instantly makes someone hot? Instantly. Instantly? Instant. Confidence. You can't instantly see someone's confidence, can you?
Yeah, I feel like you can tell if someone carries themselves confidently. True. Confidence or a sense of humor, both those things. I am always going to be like, that's... Okay, what about physical appearance, right? Like... Pretty lips. Lips. I knew you were going to say that. I...
My lips are the worst on this fucking planet. What are you... That's not true. They're small. That's another thing. I fell one time. Another time? How many teeth have I chipped? All of them. All of them. I fell off a bike.
chipped my tooth split my lip and now i have a weird lip it's another reason i'm like you have a scar no but i feel i can't feel it oh no yeah that spot yeah that's so annoying i know but it bothers me but it's not like my lips were so nice before i didn't really ruin much people would probably be like yeah born with it remember when you need some chapstick remember when we did make out and i was like your lips are chapped no you don't
No. Yes, you do. I remember when you got mad at someone because I was seeing them and for my birthday, they got me chapstick and a wallet and you freaked the fuck out. And you were like, I don't like her. I don't think you should be talking to her. And I'm like, why? What was wrong? What did she do? And you were like, that was rude of her. And I'm like, I thought it was nice. I need these things. I don't understand why I was mad about that. You're triggered because you liked me. How many sex toys do you think I own? You? Yeah.
Brand deal. I do have some from a brand. Um, I have no idea. Like, it's weird. But how much would you, how many would you guess? Like, I can't even think of what you would think. Like, four to six. That sounds right. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty average number. I'm like, I'm not going to put you on a weird end of the spectrum where I'm like, creepy. I know, that's it. 38 of the same thing. At least. Do you like to talk dirty?
You're good at it, right? I remember you saying that. I remember you saying that once you liked it. Do you? Like, I'm not... You guys, if you've been here on the podcast, I have a hard time with words. So I'm definitely not saying anything important when I'm doing it. I don't have anything against it, but I'm definitely not like, yes, this is going to make me look good. I'm definitely not saying anything important. Like, no, like not. You're not. That's not going to be like, I feel great now. Okay.
Hey, sponsor us. How much do you trust yourself to stay faithful in a relationship?
With Amy, I would never do anything to hurt that girl. I'm like a thousand percent faithful. Billion percent. You look like you like malfunctioned when I asked you. Yeah, I got stressed. Never had the whole experience of like being cheated on or like doing a really bad like cheating moment. I haven't had it happen to me in a really crazy way. Have you?
been cheated on? Like where now you can't trust people. If I had been, I don't know that I was. Yeah, same. And I don't want to know. I'm like, did you guys? I would prefer in general, I'm like, don't I don't want to know. People get real upset about it. Why would I want to know that now about anyone I ever, I would be like, don't. What if it did happen? Do you think you would have a hard time dating now? Like,
If I had ever been cheated on? Yeah. Some people are really like. No, because I think if I got like cheated on like within a relationship. Well, I don't know because I. No, I know. But if it happened, I think I would just probably be like, you don't care about me and I'm going to not date you anymore.
Are you someone that thinks that if somebody like cheats or something bad happens, it's like no going back? Like, are you forever mad about it or could you stay? I think it would depend. Like, I think there are some cases of circumstantial information I would need to know. Yeah. You know, like, OK, you were wasted and made out with someone. Maybe I could be like, I forgive you.
I'm talking about when you're in a committed relationship with someone too. Like when you're dating someone. If like my girlfriend did that or my wife did that or whatever. I'd be like, tell me why that happened. True. I feel like every story is different too. Yeah. It's hard to say. I would always hear somebody out. Yeah. A thousand percent. I would definitely give someone the chance to explain themselves to me. But also if you don't love them that much, then obviously be like, bye. I just think a lot of times when that happens, like really when people cheat, it's just like a sign that
something is wrong already yeah obviously so it would be i sometimes don't think that though where i'm like you really i mean sometimes no yeah where it's like you're just so stupid i guess yeah that's the thing i just don't think it's a black and white answer i'd have to yeah it would have to some people think that some people do think it's black and white yeah if you got cheated on you'd just be like i'm leaving now for sure but i don't feel that way yeah i think i would let someone explain themselves to me imagine
what no explanation get the fuck out of here you don't honestly don't talk to me ever again don't you know i'm like also make me sick committed partner that if i'm like you're like too committed okay you're the sweetest person okay you're very nice you are you're not sketchy at all thank you if i'm yeah what you don't like the compliment no i love the compliment you want to be sketchy no if i'm dating someone i have like blinders to everyone i think
Like if I have a girlfriend, I am like that is my girlfriend. Yeah, we know. Okay. You guys were calling Lil Poop. Calling. You're on the podcast right now. Oh, yo, what's up podcast? What's up? If you could ask us one question, what would it be? When are you making a proper YouTube return? Proper YouTube return? We might make a video when Vanessa's here. Actually like a Q&A or what kind of?
No, like, uh, you're gonna do the chapstick challenge again, remember? Okay. Love ya. Love you, bro. So cute. Love you so much.
Okay, guys. I hope you liked this episode of X's and O's. You can check out Vanessa's Instagram. It's at the underscore webs. Yeah, I think that. Yeah. You think? Yeah, I don't know. It's been a while, so. Yeah. Or her Tumblr, which is keep up or shut up, but I don't know how much for posting on there. I wish. Wish. Anyway, I hope you like this episode and, uh,
comment below if you want to see us do anything else we might while Vanessa's in town. She's here till Saturday and it's Tuesday today so it's possible. It's too much time. See us again. Yeah. Love you guys so much. Love you so much. I love you so much. Thanks for having me. Anytime. I'm proud of you. You're doing a great job. You're doing a great job. Thank you. We're back on track baby. That was a good one. Okay. Okay bye. Bye.