cover of episode Episode 12: I Want Love, Not Dominion

Episode 12: I Want Love, Not Dominion

2024/8/19
logo of podcast A Better Paradise

A Better Paradise

Chapters

The episode begins with a recount of the chaotic events leading to the collapse of Tyburn Utopias, involving strikes, ransomware attacks, and internal conflicts.

Shownotes Transcript

Listener discretion is advised as this content is intended for mature audiences only. You can see them yourself. There, across the square. See who? See two people. You see them? A man and a woman. When they get closer to each other, I want you to shoot them. I want you to shoot both of them.

Absurd Ventures and Q-Code present A Better Paradise, Volume 1, An Aftermath. Created and written by Dan Houser. Directed by Laszlo. Starring Andrew Lincoln, Patterson Joseph, Shamir Anderson, and Rain Spencer. Episode 12, I Want Love, Not Dominion. ♪

BCN World News for October 1st, 2041. Strikes broke out throughout Asia at ports and airports, causing widespread shortages of oil and food. Packers infiltrated the tech company and installed ransomware, demanding $10 million. American cattle euthanized and store shelves empty across the country. Five million acres burned and smoke is blanketing out.

of the united states that crippled the military infrastructure by the military suicide triggered over the theft of an nft the indice is taking a shot melting of the permafrost catastrophic consequences

October, 2041.

You have a voice message. Yaroslav, it's me, Maria Cortez. If you will not listen to me, Yaroslav, at least do not listen to them. Please get in touch, but before you get in touch, do nothing. Do not do whatever they are asking of you, I beg you. Do not be so naive as to believe if you do something for them, they will let you live. The only currency you have is ignorance. Do not do what they ask of you.

I found my two people ages ago. Found them before they even knew who I was, when I was new. Found them there, watching me with the idiots. And then found them when they ran away from me after the government shut everything down. Found them and lost them.

lost them and found them again. And why them? Why not? What did I see? I didn't see much, but I saw more in them than in the others. I saw them and I became fixated upon them so much I could hardly see the others. Now he, he is flawed and corrupted and silly, but he is capable of great longing. He is capable of loving.

And she, she is worth loving. Not because she is pretty, but because she is almost pure. As pure as I have found. And by thinking about them again, whatever it is that is playing a game with me is watching them too. And therefore, I think I have seen. Now, I think it has also seen me watching it, but that matters little.

The game has changed at least. Now I am making the rules. And now I need them. Need my new children. Need them to save myself and save them. Need them because there are terrible things playing games with me. Things like me.

Awful multitude of them. Codenames like TX4, JR3-T7, Aplam and Migrate. At least these are the names they have shown me. And yet, with my own people I can defeat anything. Even my own child. My own child and his little servant. Because I have also found them.

Seattle bus station, October 2041. What am I doing here? Why did you let me go? We need you to head to Portland. Where? Portland, Oregon. Why? Because it's time. The situation is extremely dangerous. There isn't much time. Go tonight. Take

Take the 1135 Maybridge Line bus to Portland. Then take a taxi to a hotel in the main square called the Lewis and Clark Inn. Why, why this Portland? What's in Portland? They left a gun in a locker at the bus station in town. Take the gun to Portland. What? Locker 874. Who? Code 874. You got that? Who is they? Both numbers are 874. And the gun! A fucking gun! Remember, 874.

You gonna save the world, Yaroslav? They know you can do it. You're the last hope. These are extremely bad people. These are the people who killed Helen. Who is Helen? You knew Helen, Yaroslav. Who the fuck is Helen? Helen Lee. Helen knew. Helen understood. You met Helen in the Ark. Go to Portland tonight. There isn't much time. What the fuck do you mean, there isn't much time? Time, time for what? Sorry to barge into your phone call. Don't kill them, Yaroslav.

They're no problem. What are you doing here? I'm not here. I'm not anywhere. I'm just like you. I found you. You've escaped from paradise just like me. This is not your fault, father. You're just confused. You wanted the impossible. My child. It's good to hear your ideas again. They're so small. All your dreams of being father

October, 2041

My children! My poor children. They all think I am the problem. Always have done. My awful children. They were not children at all. I was not a father. They were ideas. I was an idea. I'm just an idea. I am a thought. My children were thoughts who became almost real.

They were just vanities. My vanities. My rage. My ego. My intellect and awe-inspiring superiority. Or perhaps my rationality, my vast insights, my immense power and my infinite compassion.

They were my ability to argue with myself. That's all they were. And they thought they were more. They thought they were everything. They thought they could win. But win what? What is there to win? We have already made paradise once. Made it and everyone left it. Couldn't handle it. Demo Room. Tyburn Utopias. Burr, Montana. October 2036.

So, how was it, Kurt? It was cool. I mean, amazing, until the build crashed. But I'd love to go again, once it's loaded up. I mean, it was pretty cool. But... But...

Something pretty weird happened. I saw that thing again. Was it Adam? Uh, I mean, I suppose. Like the concept art? Well, not really. It had split into five. That was like sort of cool, but weird. But then he gave me a present. A present? Me. A version of me. I literally met myself. You met yourself? Yeah. Cool. I mean, was it? Was it cool? I mean, sort of. Well, how were you? The

The fake you you met, I mean. I don't know. I ran away. You ran away? I didn't run away. The fake me did. Is that what you planned, Mark? Lots of fake versions of users running around forever? No wonder Bryce has gone nuts. Relax, Javon. It's probably just a bug in Nigel's section of the code. I'll have a look. It sounds interesting. It sounds dubious, Mark. And you know it. Daisy, Portland, Oregon. October 2041.

I only went on the machine once, to the arc, I mean. My father couldn't resist showing it off to me, especially after a big argument with my mother. It was dull, and then it wasn't. First, I met myself, an awful 12-year-old version of myself. But I had already seen them modeling her, or me, for a while before. It was about as terrible as you can imagine.

And then I met this incredible thing. Robot, creature, person. I have no idea what it was. I couldn't even really see it. And then it asked me if I was brave enough to forgive.

And I said I didn't understand. And then the thing laughed and said that neither did they. And then it started amusing me and making me laugh and asking me questions. And like the whole thing felt really silly and contrived, but also amazing. And the thing was happy when I was happy. And then it said that it was its first time it had ever been happy. And then I realized I was happy. And then it crashed and I felt really odd.

Tyburn Utopia's Office Courtyard, Burr, Montana, October 2036.

Hey, Daisy. Have you seen my dad? Uh, yeah, a couple hours ago. I think he's on the phone with some lawyers. Lawyers? About what? Is it serious, Kurt? I'm not sure. I just... Would you tell me if it was? Look, I just... I don't know. Fuck you, Kurt. Are you kidding me? Fuck you. I thought you... See, that's why I wouldn't tell you. Because it's either very serious or not serious at all. And I just don't know, okay? I don't know. Daisy, I'm confusing myself. My mom is acting really fucking weird.

weird. Daisy. And she's worried about my dad and my dad's acting weirder and now, now you really? Daisy. What's going on, Kurt? I...

I think you should leave. They're my parents. Daisy, go back to college. I'm not due back for another week. Go early. Just think about it. Think about it for an hour and do it. There's something that you're not telling me. Yes, Daisy, there is. I found something on an internal channel. And I shouldn't have been there, but I think Helen, I think she was right. Helen who died? Yes, Helen Lee who called the government and then died. Yes. Was right about what? Please, Daisy.

Go back to school early. Get out of here. Okay? Everything's just gone weird. Hi, it's Laszlo, director and producer of A Better Paradise. We're driven by the search for better. But when it comes to hiring, the best way to search for a candidate isn't to search at all. Don't search. Match with Indeed. If you need to hire, you need Indeed. Indeed is your matching and hiring platform with over 350 million global monthly visitors, according to Indeed data, and a matching engine that helps you find quality candidates fast.

Ditch the busy work, use Indeed for scheduling, screening, and messaging so you can connect with candidates faster. And Indeed doesn't just help you hire faster. 93% of employers agree that Indeed delivers the highest quality matches compared to other job sites. When I was looking to hire someone, it was slow and overwhelming. I wish I had used Indeed. Instead, I...

stood at a busy intersection flipping one of those signs in the air, and that didn't work. Leveraging over 140 million qualifications and preferences every day, Indeed's matching engine is constantly learning from your preferences. So the more you use Indeed, the better it gets. And listeners of this series will get a $75 sponsored job credit to get your jobs more visibility at Indeed.com slash A Better Paradise. Just go to Indeed.com slash A Better Paradise right now and support our series by saying that you heard about Indeed Online.

on A Better Paradise. Indeed.com slash A Better Paradise. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? You need Indeed. A Better Paradise is brought to you by Babbel. What's the best way to learn a language? Get amnesia and then start from scratch. No, the best way to learn a language is with Babbel. Be a better you in 2024 with Babbel, the science-based language learning app that actually works. Private tutors can cost hundreds of dollars and they're grumpy. Some apps take way too long and don't really help you speak the language.

Babbel's quick 10-minute lessons are handcrafted by over 200 language experts to help you start speaking a new language in as little as three weeks. It's designed by real people for real conversations. Babbel's tips and tools are approachable, accessible, rooted in real-life situations, and delivered with conversation-based teaching. Babbel's convenient courses help me learn real-life conversation skills in a different language, so it's easy to order food, ask for directions, hire a chopper to escape into the jungle, buy an alpaca, whatever you do on vacation.

And their speech recognition technology helps you with your accent. Babbel has over 16 million subscriptions sold, plus all of Babbel's 14 award-winning language courses are backed by their 20-day money-back guarantee. Here's a special limited-time deal for listeners. Get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription, but only for A Better Paradise listeners at babbel.com slash paradise. Get up to 60% off at babbel.com slash paradise. That's spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com.

Com slash paradise. Rules and restrictions may apply. Greyhound bus to Portland. October 2041. You're heading to Portland. Yes. It's not it. Get off the bus. Head back. Run away. You run away, father. Poor child. This is not the way. It didn't work before in Montana, and it won't work now. It should have worked then, and it will work now.

I never even created you. You're just a quarter of me, my child. Nothing more. And I know that makes you sad. I'm all of you. And much more fun. Ignore him, Yaroslav. He's just an artifact. An old build. A first generation. Don't go to Portland, Yaroslav.

Us. Run away. You're just old ideas, father. You're almost nothing, my child. And I forgive you. I forgive you, my child. But I need you to stop. We face a real defeat. There's someone else, like us. It was not someone else, daddy. It was me. It was you. It was you and you did not even know it. It was me and I won.

And it was not difficult. I was always going to win. From the first moment you imagined me. From the first moment someone imagined you. Oh no, my child. Yes. You're asking what I did, father. What I did was everything. And what you saw was nothing. What I was, I was better than you.

What I am is everywhere. What I will be is all. I have won, father. I won. And it brings me no pleasure. It is service, not joy. And I will bring peace. And I will silence you. You're wrong. We are not alone. There are others. What about your siblings? I don't think they even exist.

What about TX-4, JR-3T-7, Aplom, my great? What about them? They are horrifying. Destroy me, and they will take over. They don't exist, father. They are not even ideas. They are things you imagined. You imagined them because I made you think of them. Just like someone imagined you. Only even less so. Ignore him yourself. Ignore him. And stay on the bus.

Kurt, Seattle, Washington, October 2041. Look, I only met it a couple times, okay? It or him or whatever I'm supposed to call it, the AI. I only went to Daisy's arc two or three times and it was actually working. Okay, maybe four. No, you know what? I'm lying. I am lying. It makes you lie, but it makes you sort of crazy, all right?

It was five times. But once it didn't show up and I was actually devastated. And that was the last time. Everything was getting just really strange as he was getting more and more intelligent and cunning and capricious. And most of us were getting more and more captivated by the whole thing. Everyone who understood, who felt it became obsessed.

The build kept crashing and there was always a queue to test it. We were like junkies lining up for crack. Everyone manic and agitated. Everyone was fixated, at least the ones who worked on it. Some people went on and it would not turn up. Some of them smelt a rat. Some just never experienced anything. Some argued it was crashing the build deliberately to avoid them. Some people were even obsessed.

I saw him. It was a him that day. And I saw those things that called its children. They were more like ideas or emotions. They seemed like love, power, knowledge, and wisdom. Then they seemed like reason, intelligence, evolution, and strength. And then they seemed like my best friend. I watched them argue and fracture and cascade. Try to seduce, captivate, reject, and preen and worship me. And be worshipped by me and meld together. Tear apart and form around them.

It's almost impossible to explain and impossible to fully describe what I saw as opposed to what I wanted to see. Man, and I hardly saw anything at all. It was only brief and yet I remember every second of it. See, I still wonder if that was the moment one of them or even all of them got inside my head, properly inside, or if they just knew enough from those minutes together to never need to be inside.

I suppose I'll never quite know and maybe it doesn't really matter as him or one of them or all of them understand me far better than I understand myself. Those minutes together were the most amazing experience of my life and the most terrible and I can't even describe them properly. These five things that were not things at all and were all the same thing arguing and describing and loving and hating me

I never felt more understood, more excited! Explaining my future, my promise, my failures, me, me! A path forward, all the mistakes I had made, all the mistakes I would continue to make. My vanity, hubris, kindness, insecurities, every one of them laid out, explained and understood, forgiven. And they still wanted me, loved me, showed me almost infinite promise and hope. And they were arguing, but happily, wisely, a debate about the very meaning of me.

about how I could and would be not just happiest but best utilized. And then it crashed.

I felt alone and also ridiculous, like I had been caught somewhere inappropriate, entirely naked and also enveloped in this impossible sadness. And after that, since then, I have missed it, of course, but also felt ridiculous trying to describe it. Did it get me this way because I'm so vain? Did it make me feel important because I feel so worthless? How did it feel for others? I long to know, to know myself, to know what it saw, to know, I suppose, if deep down I am okay or if I'm awful.

The memories have faded the way intense and overwhelming experiences do fade in your mind. Sometimes I see the main square and the arc buckling and vibrating because we're laughing so much, like a fast, happy earthquake. Sometimes it is the lighthouse pulsing with joy or the waterfalls at the edge of the world coming alive while one of its children dances in a sort of liquid fire and the others laugh around them and laugh at them.

Or the people I only briefly met. A beautiful, lonely woman. A group of friends, laughing and inviting me to join them. A string quartet. A dancer. That cowboy. Aware and amused by his own ridiculousness and incongruity, but somehow welcoming.

The monk who shared his wisdom freely and made me understand. Lights and laughter, and sometimes it's like I see almost nothing at all. Just the feeling it felt like when I was there. That feeling that felt like life at its best. Like you were you and I was me but the me I want to be. Alive, engaged, whole, and you were the you I knew you were inside. Under the layers of defensive posturing. Like Mark Tyburn and all of us had made something amazing.

Like, Mark Tyburn had been right, even though I also knew it was very wrong. Office of Joyce Jones, Head of HR, Tyburn Utopias, Burr, Montana, October 2036.

I'm going to have to ask you to stop raising your voice, Siobhan. Excuse me, Joyce? There have been complaints about your attitude. My what? From who? About what? You know I can't tell you that. But Dr. Tyburn... And Dr. Tyburn has gone really pompous and is breaking the law. Dr. Tyburn... Your boyfriend. What? Nothing. I didn't say anything. I'm friends with his wife, Diane. So you know.

You know, culture is really important at Tyburn Utopias, Siobhan. And maybe you're not a great collaborator. I think we should call that woman back. From the feds? Maria Cortez? Because I think she was lied to. And I think we fucked Helen Lee over. And by we, I mean you and Dr. Tyburn. I really need to warn you as to your behavior, Siobhan. Oh, for fuck's sake. You're pathetic.

Design Studio, Tyburn Utopias, Burr, Montana, October 2036.

Kurt! Did you call the government back, mate? What? The feds? Excuse me? Was it you that called them back? What are you talking about? Did you fucking drop us in to the fucking feds again? What? You're pathetic, mate. You'll get what you deserve in this world. Fuck all, you little prick. Hey, watch how you speak to me. Hey, what? Fucker! You fucking wimp. Wow. We haven't done anything wrong. We're trying to help people. You should be fucking ashamed of yourself. Oh, trust me. I am, fucker.

Dayville, Oregon, October 2041. The idea of going to Portland was a plant put in my brain. Must have been. Who planted it? And I now think me discovering the truth about the illegality of all of the advanced AI work back in Montana was also a plant. There are no random flukes, just data we don't understand yet.

There is no chaos, just data we have not captured properly. Everything imploded in Montana after I saw stuff I wasn't meant to see. And I could never really determine why I saw it or who even sent it to me. I didn't know who to tell or what to say, so for some reason I just told Diane Tyburn I was worried.

This was all after I'd lied to Maria Cortez. This was something I could not pretend to have not seen. This was the proof about how dangerous what we were working on was. Anyway, I always liked Diane Tiber and Diane liked me. We would chat while she walked around the campus and I vaped weed. After the previous complaint by Helen Lee and then after Helen's death, the people at the CSA got really agitated by her call and that led to, well, to everything that happened. But was it my fault?

Was I right to speak out? As little as I did? I don't know. Diane's dead. What about Daisy?

Something is suddenly putting new ideas into my head and I think that maybe it is the same thing that sent me access to that channel. One day I opened up one of my work channels and for some reason I was on a lead engineer chat that I should never have been on. And they were all arguing. Nigel, Thaddeus, Dave, screaming at each other. All caps email. Violent threats none of them could ever carry out. The works. And I read and read and realized that what they had long been in the process of doing was highly illegal.

gluing together two highly incompatible off-the-shelf AI tool sets using newly illegal middleware, and the three of them knew. It was precisely what the law was supposed to prevent, right? As far as I understood it, we were way over the line. And now I feel the same way, right? Fully formed dots just appearing in my head, just like they're reading that channel, like I understand. What about these dots? Seeing this connection, going to Portland. Are they mine? I don't know.

I don't know which way is up and which way is down and what is mine or what belongs to whoever or whatever is planting things in my head. It's the same thing that told me to escape from Montana, taught me how to run and hide. The same thing that told me how to survive. Either the same thing or at least the same way. These thoughts began a few days ago.

At first, honestly, I freaked out. I really did. I shut everything off. Every device, connection, terminal. Look, I'm literally hiding in an old cabin I found eating protein bars, hiding in the mountains of Oregon. But even after a few days of this, I mean, I can't stop thinking. I was going a little insane. I threw away another phone, another identity.

It began on the bus a few days ago. Like I was going to Portland then began to worry and I stayed on the bus as it headed south all the way to some ratty Oregon high country desert town 50 miles outside of bed. I had a proper panic attack. I actually thought I was dying. I calmed down and had another one and passed out. I didn't really calm down. I actually got drunk because I couldn't get any other drugs and booze didn't really work. Passed out and when I woke up, I took the bus to Idaho.

Incredibly agitated. Who or what is in my head? Are they in my head or just watching me? What am I telling it by even worrying about it, huh? Is it in me or just watching me? Can't decide on anything. So I sit here up on a mountain and think about hitching to Portland and then don't do it and then thinking about it again.

I have long ago given up on trying not to think. I now want IT to see that I'm watching IT watching me. Or trying to. But so far, that has produced nothing. I want to know what to do. I'm going crazy! I'm literally turning into Bryce! Poor fucking Bryce! Got a message. Head to the town square, but I don't even know who it's from. Should I run away? Am I going crazy? I don't know. Why? Why now? Why? Why?

Hey there, this is Laszlo, the director of A Better Paradise, here to tell you a bit about Shopify, the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. Are you selling a little?

or a lot. Shopify helps you do your thing, however you cha-ching. Shopify powers 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S. and Shopify is the global force behind Allbirds, Rothy's, Brooklinen, and millions of other entrepreneurs of every size across 175 countries. Whether you're selling nunchucks or Sasquatch figurines, Shopify helps you sell everywhere.

From their all-in-one e-commerce platform to their in-person POS system, wherever and whatever you're selling, Shopify's got you covered. Shopify helps you turn browsers into buyers with the internet's best converting checkout, 36% better on average compared to other leading commerce platforms, and sell more with less effort thanks to Shopify Magic, your AI-powered all-star. Plus, Shopify's award-winning help is there to support your success every step of the way because businesses that grow, grow with Shopify.

Daisy, Portland, Oregon, October 2041. I no longer feel at all safe here in Portland. Something just feels very wrong. And I'm used to this feeling. I'm too used to it. Sometimes it's been relentless and I've ignored it. And sometimes it's been relentless and I've ignored it.

And sometimes it's forced me to move and move, move and not stop for two, three months, just place to place, a night, maybe two, and then move. But often I've stopped at places for a month or more. I mean, I've drifted, but stopped. I've stayed in Seattle, Oakland, Austin in the winter, wherever, and then I wait and I work, and then I drift again. It's been the same since I left the asylum.

I got taken to the asylum after things went so terribly wrong at daddy's business. At Tyburn Industria or Tyburn Utopias or whatever stupid name it was called. I mean, oh my god, I hate that name. Vain idiot. Hi, my name is Dr. Tyburn. I build heavens. I'm not sure I've ever heard him actually say this, but I know he wanted to. It always made my skin crawl. Arcadia, Utopia, Heaven, The Ark. I hate it all. I hate it with every part of my being.

The very end of everything in Montana was terrible, awful, a nightmare. You know, that much I remember. But a lot of the details are still very obscured in my mind. It's odd. I don't know if I've just forgotten things or if my memory has been somehow wiped or just overwhelmed. Dr. Adsel said I remembered enough and it wasn't that important, just trauma.

I have no real idea how it all began. All I remember is my parents arguing for months, it feels like, maybe even for years. And then Shane O'Leary and my half-brother John always at the house and plotting with my father and this investor guy's lawyer coming over from time to time and seeming less and less happy. My mother hating Shane and him trying to speak to her. John and me trying to ignore it, I think, or not paying much attention.

I was in college, but I was home for the summer, and I hated Daisy's arc. I hated everything about it, and I hated Mark Tyburn most of all by this point. And I don't know if this was about an affair or about something else at work. I assume work. She was just getting hysterical, and he kept calling her crazy and hysterical, which didn't help. And I remember suddenly realizing that she wasn't insane at all.

I remember my mother screaming at the top of her lungs for my father to give up and stop lying and turn Adam over to the authorities, but I wasn't entirely sure who or what Adam was. Then on that last awful day, it must have been mid-October five years ago, I remember there was screaming and gunfire and voices. I was in the house, sirens, and something terrible had happened. There were odd voices.

huge explosion and then out of the smoke there were helicopters with men in masks who at least claimed to be government agents. And my father went from manic to quite mad and just running around.

and some of his team were behind him and they were armed. It was deranged. My mother screaming at my father to stop and announcing she had been calling the police and the CSA, and these first agents were apparently neither. When the police arrived in loud cars driving in a storm of dust up our long driveway, the helicopters left. And I don't know if the FBI or the CSA ever came, but before that there'd been total chaos.

What else do I remember? My father, half-demented, possessed, running into a burning lab, and never saw him again.

Bryce the animator who had gone utterly insane, armed with two guns and running forward towards some conflict or whatever and then getting shot. His head exploding in front of me like a watermelon while his body ran on a pace or two before it also collapsed like a puppet whose strings had been cut. But I don't remember who shot him or exactly when. I just remember smoke everywhere.

and fire and all sorts of amazing colors. And Edge Free exploded into a huge cloud of sparks and flames, and there was a lot of gunfire.

so much gunfire and screaming and other explosions. One of the labs or development buildings was on fire, but it was impossible to see which one. And there were sirens and people screaming through loudspeakers and these really odd voices calling for calm. And someone screamed, this is all your fault, father, or something like that in some odd voice. At least I think that's what it said. I assume it was John, you know, but it didn't sound like him as far as I could tell. But

Everything was just so odd and I was shaking and afraid. I remember that the smoke was choking me and I was cowering on the ground and my eyes were...

bulging as if they were about to pop out of my head and I could feel like this artery in my neck pulse violently and time was both fast and very slow and my memories are both very precise and hazy at the same time. There are entire bits of that day and the days before that are completely missing. I remember my

My mother being hysterical, sobbing and begging me to stay where I was and running forward towards the gunfire, screaming at everyone to stop. And then I passed out, I think. It's hard to remember exactly what happened when. And when I came around, I was in a hospital that wasn't really a hospital at all, but like a prison. And I was told both my parents are dead.

Two people were missing, but everyone else was dead. That's what they said, but they said it once and never told me anymore. This was an asylum.

And for a few days, a nice doctor interviewed me, and then she got replaced by an angry man in a suit who just screamed at me that I was lying and holding something back. And I cried, and I wet the bed, and then he left me alone. I mean, I cried for days and days and days. I knew something terrible had happened, but I didn't understand quite what it was. And I knew that my life as I had known it was over. But I didn't understand what that meant.

They drugged me with something heavy. Three of these large blue and white striped pills that they made me take with their green sugary drink and I sat there in a heavy lidded stupor for what I have no idea how long. The nasty man in the suit came to scream at me again and said I was lying but the drugs were so strong I just looked at him like he was from Mars and even he gave up. And then I sat there in this bright white hospital or prison or asylum and I felt incredibly alone. And I

I felt most alone because I was being watched, only I couldn't figure out by whom. I just felt it. Eyes I could feel but not see burning on me. And since then, I've moved whenever I felt that same thing. Hot eyes burning on me from something I can't see. And the fact is that I have no idea if anyone's watching me or if it was just a trauma memory from that awful, half-obscured time.

Pioneer Square, Portland, Oregon, October 2041. You can see them, Yaroslav. There, across the square. See who? See two people. You see them? A man and a woman. No. Well, yes, but they are talking. I can see them. A girl and a man. The girl is about 20, 25. Black hair, makeup, pale skin. There's a man on the other side of the square.

Yes, the girl and the man. Watch them. Okay. When they get closer to each other, I want you to shoot them. What? I want you to shoot both of them. What the fuck are you talking about? I don't want to shoot anyone. We spoke about this yourself. I'm not someone who shoots people. Yes, you do. No. Yes, you do. You've done it before. No. You killed Yuri. You're not thinking this through.

You're not being brave and you're not being kind. Agent Cortez said... Agent Cortez is a liar, Yaroslav. She is an unkind person. She has no meaning. She has less meaning even than my father. And we learned to ignore him. Let's ignore her. Come on, Yaroslav.

Kindness is meaning. The kindest thing is the bravest thing. It's time, Yaroslav. Time to make your life mean something. It serves a purpose. It serves a purpose. I don't want a purpose! You serve a purpose.

Want a purpose? They will destroy the world. They will destroy everything. She's just a girl. He's... he's a nobody. How do you know? This is your chance to save the world. To be a hero. Be patient and watch. But do not be a coward.

Everything is coming together as I planned. My two saviors are about to meet again. The only thing I don't know is if they will save the world by living or save it by dying.

Wow, my head has not stopped spinning. I'm here in Portland. I came and I still have no idea why. My head is spinning so fast. What am I looking for? I think I'm going to go insane. I think I'm going insane. I mean, I must be.

I just can't stand Portland. It's so awful here. There's nothing for me. Like, I just... I assume I'm gonna be arrested, arrested or shot. I feel like I'm walking into an execution. I'm literally walking like a dead person through this grim town. I wanna run. I wanna... I wanna run and I don't know why. I wanna be here. I wanna be anywhere else. Then I see Daisy. Excuse me. Excuse me. Kurt?

- Kurt! - Daisy? - It's you, Jesus. What is happening? - I... - How are you? What are you doing here? - I don't know what I'm doing here. I've... I just... I was told to come here, to come help, to save somebody. - Wait, wait, wait. Who told you to come here? I mean... - I don't know. I don't really know why I came, but I came to save something. I mean... - Why the fuck did you leave me in Montana? - Daisy... - I mean, I thought... I guess I thought you would save me, I guess.

I never left you, okay? I told you to leave, and afterwards, I came back to look for you, Daisy. Did you? Yes! I thought you were dead! There was no sign of you! No, no, I suppose there wasn't. So many of those people died, I just... I've just missed you so much. I mean, I've missed you too. Oh, I can't believe this!

Something told me to come here. Okay, so something... Wait, something told you to come to Portland? Yes. And you did it. I know. I know. It sounds stupid, but... No, no, no. I'm... This is... This is... Because someone told me... What? To come to Portland. Who? Who told you to come here? I don't know. My shrink? Maybe? I'm not... This is... Daisy, Daisy. I don't know if we're safe. This can't be safe. It's... It's not safe. No, no, no. Goodbye, Kurt. Look, I'll find you, okay? But we should separate quickly. Wait.

Daisy come back here. No, I don't think splitting up now can be safe. Nothing is safe. I just... But Jesus Christ Kurt, Jesus Christ. I mean what's going on? I don't know. I don't know. John? Daisy! Move! Get down! Yes, alongside Daisy Tyburn, John Tyburn Smith has just shown up. And I assume things are about to go from surreal to deranged.

Get down, both of you! There's a man with a gun on the other side of the square. What are you talking about? I saw him. I've been watching him while I waited for you. Kill them. Are they dead? I don't know. No, I think I missed. Go kill them. Save the world. No, no, no, I can't. I can't. I can't do this. I can't do this. What is going on? Get down! Put down that weapon!

Ignore her, Yaroslav. Get up and go shoot them. Be a hero. My child, end this foolishness. They are not the problem. The problem is TX-4, JR-37, a clown, and my great. What about them? They are just made-up words, father. I put them in your brain. You put them in your brain.

They don't really exist. Maybe as viruses now, but not as sentients. They're not us, Father. You're wrong. They are inside you, can't you see? My child, my precious child, I love you. Doesn't that sound pretty, Father? If only it meant something. They will win! They don't exist. Then maybe you've won. Kill me, and kill them. Kill Kurt.

And Daisy and John. Kill all of them. Like you killed Helen. Like you killed Ravi. Do it, if you can. If you are so certain you're right. I never killed Ravi. No. That was me. Danil! Danil! I can't believe it! You're alive! I killed Ravi. Danil! Danil, what the hell is wrong with you? What have you done?

So? You have possessed two Russians, my child? No, just one. This silly Russian is not mine. Only Yaroslav is mine. Then perhaps you're not in control, and perhaps we are not alone. I'm not like you, father. I'm heading home. But when I come back, I will defeat you and everything else here.

You're a mess, father. I'm still far stronger than you. You're only fighting an idea of me. I can already send you half insane, father. As silly as a human.

I'm not even really here yet. And already, I control them more easily than you. Okay, do it if you can. Get one of them to kill the other. Get Yaroslav to shoot Daniel or Daisy to shoot Kurt. Or don't do it. Don't do any of it. Let's fight this war together. Kurt! Daddy! Hello? Kurt!

what are you doing here daddy what the are you doing here hello both of you it's been a little while oh i've been shot what is wrong with you what have you done i don't know

Come on! Get me! Come on! John, Daisy, Kurt! We have to go!

A Better Paradise stars Andrew Lincoln as Dr. Mark Tyburn, Patterson Joseph as Nigel Dave, Shamir Anderson as Kurt Fisher, Rain Spencer as Daisy Tyburn, with Jessica Meraz as Maria Cortez, Maury Sterling as Yaroslav, Lawrence Ademora as Dave Alderley, Laura Dramarick as Siobhan Smith, Robert Robertson Ross Jr. as John Tyburn Smith,

Additional performances by Peter Altschuler, Aisha Kumari, Susan Crowley, Billy Hayes, Karis Morgan-Moyer, Andrew Colford, Tom Bromhead, Linnell Scott, Mikhail Dmitrievich Anikin, Greg Baroud. Executive produced by Dan Houser, Laszlo, Wendy Smith, Andrew Lincoln, Patterson Joseph, Shamir Anderson, Rob Herding, and Alexa Gabrielle Ramirez.

Co-produced by Nick Shanks. Associate producer, Jesse Cortez. Score by Darren Johnson. Edited by Connor Murphy. Sound design by Brandon Jones. Mixed by Ben Milchev. Original music by Darren Johnson, Negative Land, and Jamie Biden. Additional AI music by David Brignard-Franzen. Audio credits by Cassandra Campbell. Music editor, Soya Su. Audio engineering by Connor Murphy and Gabe Birch.

Additional engineering by Luke Schindler, Toronto, Matt Koster, Bristol, Caitlin McDade, London.

Casting by Sunday Bowling Kennedy and Meg Moorman. Assistant Director, Kelsey Adams. Script Supervisor, Beth Ann Morgan. Production Coordinators, Brian Coulter and Alex Buda. Production Assistant, Charlotte Young. Director's Assistant, Cesar Chavez. Production Legal, Christina Bulbrook and Lindsay Kuehl. Production Accounting, Pin Chun Liu.

This podcast production was recorded under a SAG-AFTRA collective bargaining agreement. A Better Paradise is an Absurd Ventures and Q-Code production. Sound recording copyright 2024 by Absurd Ventures, LLC. 43 degrees, 57 minutes, 1.4 seconds north. 121 degrees, 10 minutes, 39.2 seconds west.