Why Am I Eating This with Sandy Robertson RN and Linda Kreter
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Welcome to Wise Health for Women Radio with Linda Prater. Women are pressed daily to give more, learn more, and be more, often at the expense of mind, body, or spirit. Each week with intriguing guests and topics, we'll bring you fresh ways to view your limited time, encouraging a shift to new, healthier perspectives. Wise Health for Women Radio, helping women thrive. And now here's your host, Linda Prater.

Good morning and welcome to Wise Health for Women Radio. I'm Linda Crater and I am so pleased that you've chosen to join us today. We're going to be talking today about

Eating, nutrition, why we eat what we eat, and we're joined by Sandy Roberts, a nurse who has written a really marvelous book of why am I eating this? And I think we can all relate to the fact that we often eat for reasons that are not hunger-based.

And I defy anybody out there to say that they haven't grabbed something because it was out or because they were bored or they were distracted or they were anxious. And so we're going to talk today about the deeper issues underlying unhealthy eating. And I am so excited. So, Sandy, welcome to our program.

Thank you very much, Linda. Thank you for having me. I'm really excited about being here and talking to you about this hot topic, especially during the holidays, this holiday season. Well, it's not just the holidays because I think people are so, I will say as an overall thought, in the last five years and post-pandemic, we found that a lot of people did not take care of themselves because there was a lot of anxiety. There was a lot of

uncertainty. And now I'm seeing a resurgence of those who are paying attention to good nutrition, eating whole foods, you know, those kinds of things. Heck, my company's name is Wise Health. So this is something that I feel very strongly about. And one of the quotes in your book is you use lifestyle as medicine. And I fully and firmly agree with that. So let's start with that as a talking point.

Thank you for bringing that up, Linda, how important lifestyle is. And there's so much in the media these days and on social media about ways to eat, what to eat, diet, what's trending, what's not, fasting. And people need to understand that nourishment is so much more than food. And to...

tune into themselves and their mind, body, spirit, and energy systems and ask themselves, what does my body need right now? What do my mind and spirit need right now? Maybe outside in nature or more sleep or water or connecting with friends and family. Just as you mentioned, the pandemic really triggered for many people loneliness and isolation and

independent of the pandemic I think a lot of people who work from home now and are working remotely do feel lonely and isolated and it's easy to turn to food for comfort

for a friend, for solace. So my book really wants to empower people to help them change their relationships with eating and food, excuse me, but most importantly with themselves and to focus on self-care and self-love as ways to nourish themselves.

So well put because I I think that people forget that self-care includes the nourishment as you say but nourishment from a social aspect a nutrition aspect a movement aspect a spiritual aspect all of these various things influence your overall health and I know so many people who have

tried a lot of quote diets and I've never been a big believer in diets because I think that they're short-term they end you rebound I have been a huge believer and I thank my mother for this many years ago for starting us this way is that if

everything in moderation, eat healthy whole foods as much as possible, few processed foods. And now we're seeing a resurgence of those who understand that grocery shopping, the perimeter of the store, as opposed to the processed middle, makes a big difference. Absolutely. I referenced that in my book, actually. There's some great... I know, that's why I bring it up. No, thank you for bringing that up. There's some great

articles and online research from dieticians talking about shopping the perimeter, the fresh fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and it can get into the danger zone when people head into the aisles of processed foods. And I'm thrilled that people are so into whole health eating now. And what I noticed with some of my friends and colleagues is that they eat really healthy food. They either eat too much of it or too fast.

So a large actually chapter in my book is on self-awareness and mindful eating and slowing it down and being present with food and chewing because the truth is when we really chew and are present with food and slow things down, it allows us to notice when we're full.

that satiety that nutritionists and dietitians talk about. So being willing to notice I've had enough, I can push my plate aside or put it in the refrigerator. I've

wrap it up or in a restaurant, ask for it to go and it's okay. I've had enough. So that's the one other big, I'd say light bulb moment. I've noticed counseling thousands of people in many hospitals and corporations in corporate wellness and weight loss programs.

That even if people know what to eat and healthy food, they're eating too much or too fast back to for reasons that have nothing to do with does their body need fuel, meaning energy right then. I think one of the things that is followed by the wayside that I do put into practice very mindfully is sitting down at a table.

to eat. Do not eat standing up. Try not to eat in the car, zooming places. I know that there have been times we all have to do that. When you buy lunch at work, I bring my lunch because I don't want the choices that are available around my office. And I even had my daughter call me from an airport. She's a consultant and flies a lot. And she said, Mom,

Do you know how healthy we eat?

And I had laughed. I said, right. And is there a problem here? She goes, yes, they're all making fun of me. This is in her early twenties. And I said, is that the worst thing ever that you won't eat the best food stuff? She goes, no, but I'm, I'm just standing out as different. I said, well, be a good different because you're going to be the one that lives the longest, runs the farthest and enjoys yourself the most. But it's,

A lot of it, if you don't learn it early, as I was blessed to do, as I was able to pass on to my daughter and she's passed on to my grandchildren. If you aren't learning this, but late or you've forgotten it or you just don't, you're not as self-aware. I think that was one of the things in your book that struck me, too. We must be self-aware and look in.

to discover why are we eating these things? What are we eating? How are we eating them? Are you drinking sugary sodas three times a day? Or are you nibbling on fresh fruit? It's a change in lifestyle. It's definitely a change in lifestyle. And by the way, your daughter and grandchildren are so lucky to have that.

They really are. But I thought I was being accused of something at the time. And I went, OK, what's wrong with this? That's funny. That's funny. I what strikes me from what you just shared, Linda, is that, again, you were very lucky how you were raised and what you've done. And a lot of people, myself included, were.

Learned other ways of eating not necessarily that healthy all the time that food is love more is better Eat to numb emotions, you know, honestly or stress in the house But what I've learned is it's never too late. That's really the message in my book, too it's never too late to have a new look at

just what you said, why am I eating, what I'm eating now, and to love ourselves enough to work through the emotional challenges, trauma perhaps, or issues that are there that are causing us, everyone, to sometimes want to numb ourselves with food, numb our feelings. So I encourage people to not just consult their doctors, MDs,

nutritionists but also mental health providers it takes a village is my favorite expression and the programs I've witnessed that are most successful teach about nutrition and yes calories and the healthiest food but also the behavioral approaches the mindful eating and some taught by psychologists so I really my hope is that this book will help open up doorways and pathways to

to not just better eating, but a deeper relationship so people can understand what's at the root of some of their habits and love themselves enough to work through it and say, it's okay. You know, non-judgment, no shame, no blame. That's another theme. I want people...

possible to have fun with this and be able to say from a humorous point of view - why am I eating this and why would I really want to put food in my body right now when I just finished dinner 20 minutes ago you know you bring up another point growing up when we finished dinner there was no immediate dessert

There just wasn't. Occasionally there was a piece of fruit later on, but that was one of the best habits to learn. Because I will say that I hosted my grandchildren this summer and I said to them, you're acting so French. And they said, what does that mean, Nana?

And I said, well, we haven't even left the table for breakfast and you've already asked me what's for lunch. And when I say French, it's because they live their lives around food, but it's all healthy food and it's wonderful. But it hadn't even hit their stomachs by the time they're at lunch. Same thing. What's for dinner or at dinner? What's for dessert? And my daughter and I look at each other when we're all together.

And we still don't do that because we're full. But, you know, I am, again, one of the very fortunate ones who was taught this. But I also know that, as you said, trauma can cause either overeating or it can cause the opposite problem and death.

under eating. We all have a very unusual relationship with food and it's interesting to take a look at what is your relationship with food because I know many people who go one way or the other more often overeating

And there are tips and tricks. I'll give you one that I put. I work with a lot of veterans and caregivers. And in terms of snacking and things, it's what I do for myself. I put right out there in video. If there's something that I want to eat that is probably a treat, I'll put it in the cabinet behind two or three other things so that I have to think about it if I want it.

And it takes about 10, 15 seconds to move everything out of the way to get to it. So I have cogent time to think, do I really want it? And that worked for me. So I find that whatever works for you, try it.

You said it. It's different for everyone. And that's a great trick, by the way, to have things in back of the closet or on a very high shelf. It's on a very high shelf. That's good. That's good. If you need a stepladder to get to it, that will help you pause even more. Another trick of really...

allowing 10, 15 seconds to pause and think that can give your mind time to process and for you to ask, okay, what's really going on here? Is it food that I need or fresh air, a short walk around the block? A hug. Yeah, a walk, a hug, a hug from a friend. Absolutely. I do coach people too that

supporting yourself environmentally with food, meaning having food in the refrigerator and shelves that is what you want to eat and is good for you. And for some people, if cookies or crackers or chips put them into the danger zone of compulsive eating, don't have it in the house except on a special occasion or when you eat out. So different things for everyone. And that's really another

point that I love to emphasize that it's so personal for everyone and personalize your nutrition and your nourishment for you for your unique mind body spirit and energy system. Well, I love that you emphasize in the book nurturing and nourishment because I think a lot of people lack that they're so busy and

They're so rushed. They're so distracted, sometimes intentionally so, for avoidance. And, you know, we are best when we are surrounded by those or have those we can call on for comfort, for just being friends, to be in a self-discovery point of, I know what I need.

But you know, it probably isn't that package of chocolates that I just bought. Exactly. Exactly. But I'm one of those that doesn't bring it into the house. I bring it into the house, but I hide it. But at the office, and this is another thing I do, I do not bring it into the office at all. So it's not a temptation. Right. Right. What you say is true. And one of your previous guests, I...

I listened to talked about finding peace in chaos. Yes. And whether people practice breathing exercises or mindfulness or prayer, whatever their spirituality is, I find that people who do the best in not just losing weight, but keeping it off because about 80% of people gain weight back within two years, people who can embrace and incorporate mindfulness,

Breathing and pausing and perhaps some tools of mindful self-compassion and perhaps using, you know, hands over your heart or on your abdomen of I love myself. It's OK. Pause. You know, I am safe all as well. And.

Giving ourselves that sense of peace and internal peace. We can do that again, whether it's affirmations, prayer, breathing, whatever people's tools for self-care and comfort and to use them throughout the day. It's wonderful to do longer prayer or inner work beginning of the day or lunch at the end of the day. But we can incorporate this all through the day, even in a meeting, you know, unobtrusively.

with positive self-talk, which is another big emphasis and chapter in my book. What we're saying to ourselves all the time matters. We can incorporate self-love and self-compassion all through the day, especially when we're around food or contemplating what to eat next. So the power of self-talk cannot be underestimated. Positive self-talk, empowering and comforting self-talk.

It's funny, I think that, and I've had several shows on this, recognizing your self-talk. Some people are not even aware that they are negatively speaking about themselves. And so being aware of that and not being harsh, I like to say it in my coaching as, you know, be your own best friend.

Be your best supporter, because if you're not, your mind does hear the negative things. If you go around saying, I'm too stupid to stop doing X. Well, your brain heard that. And so it's best not to. But I think it's a method of even being aware of it. So I now have friends where I have permission to say you're automatically negatively thinking.

And you're not being kind to yourself. And they're like, thanks, I needed that. I forgot. I slipped. And I think that's important that you have people you can trust that can tell you that. Very important. And you're a good friend. And it's also great that you have permission from your friends to be loving but real. You know, we all need that. We all need people in our lives to be loving and real about our self-talk and our

What we're saying to ourselves, especially and loving ourselves and raising ourselves up instead of beating ourselves up. I love the loving and as a friend, embracing the best in someone and that they can shift. They can shift the words they say to themselves. I love that word shift. We can all S-H-I-F as in Frank T. We can shift to new ways of talking to ourselves and

Yeah, looking at how we're nourishing ourselves in all ways. One of the things I loved about what you just said earlier is that stillness is a practice that has been around forever. So however you practice it, it's a good idea. It's also a great self-control device when you're exhausted, you're tired, you're frustrated. Just taking a second to be still and to respond as opposed to react is

Social media has brought in a lot of reactionary responses. And I often say that scrolling on by is actually an action. It really is. Because you don't really need to fight with strangers on the Internet. That's kind of silly.

I love that scrolling on by. It's an act of self-love and self-care. Or to not click on a Facebook post that you can tell might trigger you or cause sadness or something or comparison. I love that, Linda. Scrolling on by is another great tool for self-care and self-love. Well, don't we all have those people we talk to who do tend to be...

niggly. They put a little poke. It's just the way they are. And you understand that that's the way they are. And once you've identified that, you can just let it go. And in that case, it's in person, not online. And you just let it go. And I'm a sailor.

And so when in doubt, let it out, because if you're on a sailboat and the worst things are happening, if you let go of everything, the boat will shift and move itself directly into the wind and stop. So I have lived by when in doubt, let it out. But for people and communication, when in doubt, leave it out. I love that. I love that.

It works. It works. It works. And everybody has to find their own thing that works. So I want to make sure, though, that people know where to find out more about you. And you do emphasize on your website also about the energy healing, because what are we but energy? And so your website and correct me if I'm wrong, is energyworkswisdom.com.

That's it. Exactly. Thank you. You're welcome. And what would you like to emphasize? I'd like to emphasize that we are energy systems and our energy is always shifting and changing depending on our thoughts and feelings and emotions. So our internal, what's going on internally, our energy systems are also affected by what's going on outside of us. The people around us

chemicals, noise pollution, electromagnetic things, cleaning products. And so part of the nourishment I talk about in my book is for everyone and for everyone it's different, tune into how does your energy system feel and what could you do daily to help nourish it, balance it, and or perhaps clear some of the energy that's ready to leave away. I am an energy healer and I

People who don't even know what it is or how it works once they've experienced it always feel very relaxed and clearer or clarity. And of course, there's a lot of research showing that it decreases pain and for some people, depression, anxiety, and there've been some other powerful research.

patients with cancer. So I love energy work and I love sharing with people the power of tuning into their own unique energy system and how they can fine tune it and nourish it. No, I fully agree completely. And it made me think of when you said and clear it away, we are around people all the time.

Now a days we weren't for a while there or we were around people we maybe shouldn't have been around as much. But tune in to how your body feels with those around you because we are most affected by the five people we're around the most. And I noticed that I had a longtime friend who after we would finish talking, I would feel very unsettled and unhappy.

And I realized that their energy was draining me. Energy vampires?

And sometimes you have them in your family. Sometimes you have them in your friend's circle. And there are ways to be aware of that. And so energy healing is a wonderful way to help you let that go, vaporize it. Not the friendship, perhaps, but the negative energy. Because some people just have a negative default. And if you can

work through that with them about the automatic negative thinking, what I call ANTS. I did not invent that term, Dr. Amen did. But it really does help because ANTS make it seem like it's really not you. You have ANTS again.

So if your default is negative, just recognize you can change your default to positive. It just takes practice, just like the positive self-talk that you mentioned earlier. Do you also deal with that? In terms of for myself or coaching people? Coaching people. Helping people. Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. When I am...

Doing an assessment, an energy assessment and or medical intuitive assessment. By the end of the readings and sessions, part of the recommendations always involve not just what people can do, but what they can say to themselves. Ways to not just empower themselves to take different actions for their lifestyle and health,

but how they can be their own best coach. Imagine a coach on your shoulder during the day and saying comforting, positive things about next steps, next steps. You can do it. And back to I am safe all as well. I've noticed, especially since COVID, a lot of people's nervous systems are on overdrive.

People are very busy in their lives. They're overstimulated by social media and being online all the time. A lot of to do lists and people really need to take time to pause and stop and breathe and care for themselves and also say no to. No is a full sentence. Yes. Yes.

to say no that's one of the actually the self-talk things i love to share when i'm coaching is it's okay to say no or it's okay to say no thank you and people it's fascinating have this oh look on their faces or oh yeah i get it you know i need to say no more and

It might be for a few minutes. It might be excusing yourself to go outside and have a breath of fresh air or I can't do something right now, but I can at this time. Renegotiating. That's another form of self-talk that I love to remind people of. It's OK to renegotiate. I can't do it now, but I could do it later. Or I'm sorry, I can't. That's OK.

And you know, I think people accept that answer much better than the one that says, you know, I'll think about it. I'll get back to you because that's a no. That's usually a no. Or I'll ask Mary. Oh, okay. That's probably a no also.

So I'd much rather have a direct answer so I can plan or move on. Again, I want to give your website because we're nearing the end. And it's energyworkswisdom.com. And Sandy, it's been fascinating talking this over. And I highly recommend her book. It's an easy read. It makes sense. It's practical, but it's also fun.

Because I think it just brings to mind things that you've thought about, but she wrote down in a way that makes it easier to nourish and nurture yourself as well as tie it into your lifestyle as medicine. So taking your, and this is her words, not mine, emotional eating to empowered living. Sandy, anything you'd like to add?

Oh, thank you, Linda, for having me. And when people go to the website, there's actually a free excerpt of the new second edition. So some of the juiciest material about nourishment is there.

And I'm also offering 20-minute complimentary consultations for people who are listening today to explain the work I do and help them connect with the best next steps for them, for their unique mind, body, spirit, energy systems. Well, that's very generous. Thank you so much for sharing all of this. I will post not only about you and our discussion today, but I'll also post where to get your book.

And by all means, listeners, go to the website, energyworkswisdom.com and take advantage of the online help. I think that's just terrific. Many thanks, Sandy. I appreciate your wisdom and your time. And we will talk again sometime, I'm sure. Thank you, Linda. This has been great. Thank you for your very thorough and uplifting questions. I know it will help a lot of people.

Thank you. A pleasure. Make it a great week, everyone. Thank you for tuning in today. You can find more shows at wisehealthforwomenradio.com.