What Song Do You See?
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Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractible. This episode: Blues Cruise Bob summons shit for Wade, complains about teeth, and plays Muse to his mates. Whirly Wade watches bent trees get blown, is romantic, and becomes Slug Stalin. Magician Mark returns to his kingdom, gets buggered by Apkost, then witnesses rabbits and sperm slaughter.

From fecal feasts to hidden distractible history. It's time for What Song Do You See? Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.

Hello and welcome back to what I can only assume is your favorite thing in the entire world. And by that definition, also your favorite podcast. This is Distractible. I am your host for today. My name is Bob. I'm the host because I won the last one. I'm joined by my two co-hosts slash competitors, Mark and Wade.

Oh. Editors put a raucous crowd behind me. Not behind me, like just cheering. Or then blow Mark up. No! Ah, classic. I don't know why the only thing I can think of as my background is that guy from Spongebob saying how many times we gotta teach you this lesson, old man. You know that, but you don't know the chocolate guy from Spongebob. Oh, yeah.

okay never seen distractible before the host uh comes up with some kind of topic there are points that are given out that matter a little not that much they don't mean anything they're arbitrary and then someone wins whoever wins hosts the next one that's the whole thing and before we get into that part which i'm excited because i feel like i have a good one today which means it's probably going to be a complete dumpster fire and absolute piece of shit because that's how it always goes uh we do small talk let's go guys i'm

Back home! Yeah, that looks like a familiar place. Yes, it's not a green screen. Don't look. I can touch it. Go walk through that door, Mark. Oh, yeah.

Wearing a green shirt, using a green screen, that's so brave of you. Mark Skidoo, we can too! What the fuck was that? You have Blue's Clues fans? It's been a very long time. Like, a very long time. That's fair. If you were still actively watching Blue's Clues, I guess, today, that would be weird. Is it weird? Nah, man. Blue's Clues was a great time. That's back when Steve wasn't played by Jack Black. Damn.

I like Jack Black. I just know people are like, the same thing happened with like Chris Pratt. It's like the same actor gets a bunch of roles. Everyone's like, oh, this guy again. Great. I guess he is supposed to be playing like a younger, younger man. Who? Wait, who is? What are you? Jack Black is playing Steve in the Minecraft movie. Yeah, I know that. I know that. But is Steve a younger man? Is that canonically? Is there lore behind who Steve is? I don't know, man. But apparently there's been like a lot of like people, at least a vocal minority. They're like, Steve should be young.

yeah so that's probably fair doesn't he have a beard though in the game yeah he has like a who manchu he has like a bottom chin beard thing i've not seen steve in so long because i have my own skin anyway how you doing wade hey the bangles won huh right that's gotta be good for you man the offense the last few weeks really starting to click the defense is

So, uh, there was a hurricane. Oh,

Unhappier news. God dang. No, it's been pretty bad. I know a lot of people, hopefully by the time this comes out, people are in better shape. But man, living all the way up in Ohio and having it hit, I don't know what it was like for you, Bob. I'm interested to hear what it was like for you guys. But the wind was pretty scary here. We have some tall trees and watching them go from like this direction. I'm holding my hands horizontally to vertically to horizontally the other direction.

Was kind of wild and we had a tree It didn't even break Just somehow the wind gusted so hard That the root system was taken out of the ground And the dirt came up and the roots came up And the tree landed I mean the tip of one of the branches Was like a few inches from our door And that's like where Molly's office And our bedroom and stuff are So it was like we were within like two feet Of having some I thought you were going to say That's where we go in and out of the house Yeah

that's where we leave that's how we get out for the dogs but really that is how we take the dogs out so we had to start going through the garage let the dogs go out but they uh we got someone out to help take care of it pretty quickly luckily they're like we might not be able to be there quickly if there's like an emergency we're like that's fine take care of emergencies first and they still show up the next day so i'm guessing hopefully that means there wasn't too much bad stuff around i don't know i i

pier is not bad. I can't believe what's happening in eastern Tennessee, North Carolina. It's very bad there. You see the road that's just like gone now? I-40? Did you see the actual whole town that's gone? No, I did not see that. If you look at a picture, there's a little town where it's like, there's a picture of the main drag and there's like stuff on both sides of the road and there's a new picture of it. The road is all just like exploded into chunks and there are no buildings. I can't believe how bad it was for that

part of the country. Yeah, that's not Asheville. But have you seen the flooding pictures of Asheville? That's very strange because we just drove through that on the way back to

you know, we were going around the country after, you know, the last sprint of the movie and we were through that town and we were, we weren't staying there, but we were staying up near there, but I'd never been to Asheville before. And then suddenly it's underwater. And I'm like, isn't this up in the mountains? And it makes sense as to what happened. Cause I think there was a dam nearby or, or something like that. There were like several dams that failed and, or partially disintegrated or I don't know, damn failure. It,

It's one of those things where, you know, one dam up higher, if it fails, all of a sudden that dam's amount of water hits this other dam and it was never meant for that. And it just, yeah, it can cascade like that. I think that's what happened anyway. Yeah, I've not seen all that, but it's been, it was crazy here and here. It was nothing like it was like down there. It was really not that bad for us here, but we're in a pretty good spot for wind. Our neighborhood is kind of on a hill and we're not at the bottom or the top. So we're kind of insulated here.

On Friday, we're sitting in the family room hanging out. My parents actually came to town for the weekend and we were hanging out and like it was really windy and we saw across the street our neighbor had just got a trampoline and we literally saw the trampoline do that thing they do in like videos online where it just went...

way up high and then landed upside down in the next neighbor's yard over. And so we're like, it was windy and we're kind of like, wow. And then that happened. And we were like, holy fuck. Oh, I should take the chairs in off the porch or something. Yeah. Watching trees bend the way they did. Then like there was constant cracking just limbs and stuff coming down all the time. No, you have, you have like tall old trees around your house. I want,

I grew up, the house I grew up in is near a wooded area that's a lot like where you are. It's crazy when that happens. I remember that hurricane that blew up into Ohio and like knocked power out when we were in like college-ish times, like 2011 or something. I forget what hurricane it was. I was at home at my parents' house when that happened. And those trees literally...

Like you're saying, it's like freaky how bendy they are. Can't imagine what everyone else where actually bad stuff happened. Yeah, I was gonna say, we had it like relatively mild too. And I mean, I'm glad the tree didn't hit your house. You know what? That's worth a point. No house tree point. With all the house stuff we have going on at all times, it was nice to dodge one for once. Now that you said that, definitely shit bubbling up somewhere in your house.

That noise in the hallway happened just now. And I was like, my God, you're right. Just from out of your keyboard, just go. It doesn't even make sense. How are you doing, Mark? Good. Back to YouTube. There's a plan in place. Big old plan that I was talking about. Yeah, good. Edge of sleep, you know. October 18th, that's happening. That's my birthday. Thanks. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

oh, you're welcome. Blinded just for you. I love when you guys remember each other's birthdays. There's probably other things that I could remember, but I won't. I refuse to, tactically. I just like the image of you trapped in an un-air-conditioned warehouse with no other humans around by yourself for extended periods doing whatever you were doing in there. That was what it was. And what's funny is like, because you texted me

the other day with the assumption that I told you like crowds were weird to see again. You were like, oh, you just Phil, Phil. And at first I didn't get what you were saying. And I was like, oh, Phil. And then I realized like you didn't realize I was completely alone. No, yeah. I thought you at least had like Phil there or like a person or couple.

people it was literally just you huh yeah it just so happened that when we were recording eric phil's friend was by to to feed and water the bugs and so yeah that was just a coincidence every other time it was just me alone in that warehouse going slowly insane this is a throwback that probably most people won't get i don't even know if youtube will get you remember the show lost i did i've never seen it but sure

Okay, well, I think the character's name was Desmond. Basically, he lived in a bunker and he woke up every day, had to go press a button to stop the island from blowing up, and that was his life. He lived in this locked bunker and all he did was get up, make sure this button was pressed. He was completely alone. He would have his coffee, press the button, sit around, press the button, go to bed. I imagine that's what Mark's life was like. Yeah, you were just pressing one button, right? And then nothing.

You're goddamn right. So there's something about being alone and working on something is great. Because there was this one time, though, I wish to all hell I could just press one button, which was the record button. Because I was getting some inserts and stuff and pickup chests, things that tie a lot of things together. And, you know, other things that I can't talk about. Inserts to be taller? Yeah.

Well, actually, if my limbs were longer, maybe I could have reached it. Because I have to do everything myself. So I'm sitting there. I have a lob that's behind my back, under my shirt, stuck up here. I had a boom arm here to capture. And then I was sitting. And then...

there's there's there's some movie magic occurring off to my left that is very delicate and i can't touch and it's held up by sticks glue and hope and it's just floating there and i sit there and i'm like all right it's all good and i look over to my right and i realize the camera is like just far enough away that i can't reach it and i'm i'm tied in with all these wires because the

window with with which the movie magic is occurring is like so narrow that i if i move everything is pushed in around just off screen of the camera and so um i get up and i'm like i hope the worst doesn't happen worst happened all the movie magic to my left just started collapsing just uh

Why didn't you use a selfie stick? Is that what they use for movie magic? Selfie sticks? Well, that's when I... Okay, so this is another thing. So Red, right? They have this app to control the camera, right? And you can record from that app, right? Well, I looked on the app store of the iPad because I was going, maybe I can monitor at the same time. And there was a $500 app. The app is $500.

hundred dollars. Or just an app that like connects to the thing over wifi or something. So you can monitor it. It connects to the camera's own wifi and stuff like that. And so I had not paid for that until that moment of that all occurs. I'm like, God, there would have been worth it just because like this saved me the oldest setup. It's going to take me an hour to set all this back up and it'll be useful in the future. Paid for it.

opened it and then I was like, okay, cool. I don't want to be upset on my iPad. Maybe I can download it on my iPhone instead as well. I bought it. So I was like, it could work. There's a free app on the iPhone.

Insert that meme of that monkey in Planet of the Apes. Oh, no. Oh, no. Yeah, so it's like it has less functionality, but one of the functions of it is you can press the record button, which is all I needed. Although it was very useful to be able to see what the character was seeing from a distance. That did prove useful, but $500 for an app is a total order.

That might be the most expensive app I've ever paid for. That's harsh. Well, and I'm sure some people out there are shitting their pants hearing that. But from an outsider's perspective who mostly learns about this through Mark, I can tell you out there, you would not want to hear how expensive some of this shit is that Mark has probably had to buy or rent to make this movie happen.

Holy fuck is movie making shit expensive. It's unbelievable. That's not even an expensive purchase in the world of film. That's probably, I can imagine you said you saw the 500 bucks and part of you was like,

And the other part of you was like, compared to a dedicated system that like plugs into your camera, feeds video to another device that plugs into a monitor that can cost like 2000 easily. So if you have an iPad already and it's like there, it doesn't make sense and you get more control. But honestly, it was just like, oh, yeah.

man that's a kick in the teeth though but it's still fun it's a fun challenge i did enjoy it a lot but you know less when i had to do things like that you know but you just run outside been like help filming help me yeah the last thing i want to call out to is hello strangers of this neighborhood i have lots of expensive stuff in here

You want to see my secrets? Sign this NDA and enter my home. You criminal, you respect NDAs, right? Yes. You're not in the same spot. I was going to say you could get that person whose dog you tried to steal, but I doubt you're in the same spot.

I'm the criminal there. I'm trying to think if there's something else that happened to me, but mainly the thing is James, James sleeps by himself this week. I don't know if it's going to last, but oh my God, we're making progress on the sleep training and it's a miracle.

He's so big now. He's like so human and runs around and stuff. Whenever you guys came over to watch the football game, it was wild. No, he's a menace. He's smart enough now to really cause problems and really do some dangerous shit. And he loves it.

He's getting, he's good though. His speech is developing soon. Three word sentences. Now he's working on more. He was sweet. It was really awesome. Uh, having him in mile over. It's wild. See like the progressions of baby. Yeah. Milo Milo compared to James was a crazy, crazy reminder of how far he's come. Cause my friend, we just know Milo is, uh, Patrick statics, uh, child, uh,

and is six months younger than James, I think. Not that far apart, but also basically two entirely different creatures because the development in that time is crazy. In the first few years, six months is a long time. That's true. It's still like over a quarter of his life and it's a third of Milo's life, I guess. So that's a lot.

I was like, man, oh man, I don't know how y'all can keep up because he's fast too. Yeah, he's very fast. You know when he's real fast? When he sees the ocean. I think I talked about this, but man, is he fast when he decides he's going into the ocean. Oh, I turn 35 soon. This month on the same day that Edge of Sleep comes out. That's my 35th birthday. Oh, congratulations. You'll love it. And it's my best year. I don't know. So far, I haven't been 35 that long. That might be true. Yeah, no, I believe that. It could be. Wade, what's wrong?

Another lost reference. We gotta go back. You got the 35-year-old twitches going on? Dude, I don't know. 35 is the age. I don't know what happened to me, but it's the age where everyone thinks I'm a lot older than I am. Like, I always looked a little bit older, but this is the year where I go to get, like, my hair cut, or I go to do this or do that, and everyone's like, oh, yeah, well, I'm only 40. I'm not even close to where you're at yet. It's like...

I'm 35! Who says that? Man, that's so rude. They look at you. Holy shit! Thank fuck I'm 50. Oh my god. You're walking up some stairs and someone is like, oh god, sir, hold the handrail. Here, take my arm. Your hips. You're not wearing your life alert. This could be dangerous. Someone call the B

Are you guys aware of the band Alkaline Trio? They formed in 1996. I'm familiar with them, yes. So we went to an Alkaline Trio concert the other day. They've been around a while, so they don't have like the youngest audience, right? They're a little bit older. They're closer to our age. I went there and I swear to you, I did not see anyone at that concert who looked older than me. And I'm not old. That's an interesting milestone, though. Oldest man at concert. You know, this is what we got to do. This is like a challenge. We need to

figure out a way to make you look younger like how could we age max you how could we just die just some die oh i thought you said die as in death i'm like wait hold on let me also say at the ripe young age of 35 standing on concrete for four hours not as easy as i thought it would be

Okay, Grandpa. Get a standing desk. Back in my day, they had chairs at concerts. People coming up to you at the concert asking if your daughter's having a good time. I was there with my niece. Oh, that's not gonna help. That's not even your fault. That just makes it way harder. Mark's right, though. Standing desks are great. I'm sitting at one right now. Me too. That

That's true. He's had a standing desk. Oh, right. I forgot. I've never once used the standing feature. You gotta use it. It's so good. Once you get used to it, you just need like to tough it out for a month and then it's totally fine. Yeah. And then you get so much more, you know, strength in your core. If you said tough it out for a day, I'd be like, ooh, one tough day. That's tough, man. I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I can do it.

There was some dude who did a challenge for a whole month. He did nothing but standing, not just at a desk, but he tried to stand every single moment except for sleeping and driving. And he was much healthier at the end of that. It turns out we humans, as being upright, two-legged creatures are supposed to be on our two feet a lot more. God gave me an ass for a reason, man. I'm going to use it. Well, that's...

The ass is for the reason of standing. Yeah, for sitting on. Right, got it. No, no. Anyway, anyone got any more small talk? Is that all of everything? We good? No, no. Unless you want to hear about my appreciation for good tripods, which I have now. I'm 100% sure that at least someone out there, some number of listeners was just like,

But I sincerely do want to hear about your love and appreciation of good tripods because I've never spent the amount of money to get a real one. But even the distinction between like a crap, crap one and a less crap one, I do appreciate. So I went to a camera store when I got there because I didn't bring my tripod because it's

big and heavy and bulky. And I was just flying and I didn't think I'd be there that long. So I'm like, OK, I'll need a tripod. So I go to a camera store and it's just a photo camera store. So they got tripods of varying qualities. And there was a good one that was like 250, 250 that they had a good photo tripod. They were like, it's got a fluid drag head. You know, it's got a adjustable

you know, tension. It's, it can angle up and down all the time. It's like, but it's, it's one of those where it's like, you have to, you have to like each section of the legs, you have to extend one at a time and you got twist and lock and stuff like that. And the tripod I have at home is not even the top end one, but it's called a one touch tripod, which means that the only control that make it taller is at the top.

hop you one button and it can go all the way up and down that's kind of crazy this is great it also has a real fluid drag head which is like these these photo cameras that say it's a fluid drag head means that you twist the knob and it will be some sort of tensor when you're moving it and pushing it but most time it just goes okay

as you're trying to adjust it. Not good for movies, you know? And then it, but the good tripods go like a thousand, $2,000. And you're like, it's just three sticks that holds up my camera. No, when you got one with like a buttery smooth, absolutely finely adjustable fluid drag system with like one touch up and down the amount of times I was moving this camera going,

And it's like 20 pounds of a camera. And you have to get it all the way up and all the way down, moving, changing, and doing these nice smooth motions and just trusting it to hold your camera, which is like an unbelievable amount of money on three sticks. You want three really good sticks. So I had an appreciation for... I missed my tripod so much. I missed it so much. God, I missed it.

Anyway, good tripods. They actually are worth the money. I have like the Elgato desk camera mount that like latches onto your desk and it's fine. But like I had a nicer, I think, tripod than this thing is before that I used my camera on. Well, it's nice not to have the legs in my way anymore. I understand whenever you have to make an adjustment and like it's either like, OK,

Okay, just... Nope. I just need to tilt it slightly! Nope. And then you go to lock it, and it's like, oh, I didn't lock it quite enough. Yeah, that's the worst part. You go, alright, it's perfect. Lock. Tilt it back up. Lock. It's just like, stay where you are. I put you. You have to predict where it's going to droop to. You go a little up, or you go up, and it goes, I'm good now. Huh.

ain't gonna move you finally get it the right droop and then it goes like fucking diagonally for some reason it's like ha ha yeah oh man i've everything is some like rotating mechanisms will have like teeth where when you lock it down it's like teeth that lock together i don't know if they all work like that i but one of the ones i have if the teeth are fucked

And sometimes it's like you said, it'll droop. And so you have to like account for the droop, but sometimes you lock it and then you unscrew it, but the teeth don't come apart. And so the whole thing is just stuck and you have to like, and then it just like breaks free and your whole it's, it's awesome.

I'm sure expensive, nice tripods don't do that. No, they don't. They really don't. This has got to be so relatable for everyone out there is absolutely enthralled right now. You're welcome. It's a real thing for us. Okay. Everyone can appreciate. I think that there are good tools for the job. There are decent tools that get the job done. And then there are really good tools that you need for precision. And then there are tools that you buy at target because you're like,

I just need it for this one thing. And then you get home and you're like, man, I should have bought a real tool. Fuck. Yeah. You waste money buying the cheap thing when you should have just paid more for something. And it'll last longer. That's it. That's even different things. Like you spend more on a really good one. Most of the time it'll last years, maybe even longer than you will. Lots of stuff lasts longer than I will.

Good episode, Bob. Yep. That's it. I do have one more thing to tell you about. Oh, okay. It's me being very stupid, right? Well, that's always funny for us. All right. So there's this LiDAR thing that can help you autofocus any camera. You attach it to a camera, you calibrate it. It can move the lens on its own. This has LiDAR and it shows the distance, right? I brought that with me when I went out there.

I did not open it and start to set it up until three weeks into the process because I was like, ah, man, I don't want to waste a few hours setting this up. I'll probably be done and be heading home. I don't want to lose half a day getting this thing working. Three weeks in, I had it set up in an hour and a half. It worked perfectly.

Perfectly. First time. And this never happens when you set up something new that you've never used before. No, that doesn't sound like a sort of thing that would be plug and play like that. It worked perfectly. And there were so many times, like I said, when the camera was like 10 feet away, I set focus and I was like, I hope I'm in focus.

I looked at some shots afterwards. I wasn't, I wasn't at all. I wasn't even close. You just didn't answer that in post, right? That'll be fine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just put the focus tool. Yeah. Yeah. Sharpen it. Just crank the sharpness. So yeah. Three weeks later, when I only had a couple of days before I was heading home, discovered that it worked perfectly. I think I used it for two days. It's so good. I'm actually extremely impressed.

buy that tech it has come a long way because there were previous iterations of it that did not work as good this is the latest one and it works really really well well that sounds like it would have been really nice to have yeah all right i'm gonna start talking and if anyone has any more small talk you

You just shut up. I'm just kidding. I'm not going to say that we're going to talk about synesthesia, but it's definitely inspired by that. And if you don't know what synesthesia is, it is one example of that would be like people who hear music, hear sounds, and they...

associate colors with it. Like they see a color or that sounds like this color to me, whatever. But there's a lot of different like types of anesthesia, but that, that specific thing, I was just thinking about it and I think it's really fascinating. And I have some music. It is royalty free music, but I think it's interesting. I went through and I picked these out on purpose. So I hope they're interesting. We can talk about if the songs elicit anything specifically like

color is it an animal whatever like is this something to you but what i really want to do is kind of play like an improv game with it and i want to play the snippet of song for you and then i want you to improvise the story that you think goes with that soundtrack

A story, any story. And they're not long. Like the longest, hopefully we're going to listen to is like a minute of music, but there you'll get the vibe of it. And if you want to hear it again, we play it again. But, and then we'll just decide whose is I'll, I'll decide, I guess, whose fits better. I don't really have any elaborate ground rules for this. I just think it's interesting because for me, we've talked about how I'm high of a Fantasia and I do think that's true, but music is something for me that elicits very vivid emotions.

things, not like imagery in my head, but very strong connections. Either it's some thing that I can imagine happening to the music or it's some emotion or color kind of like more like vibe. But I'm curious. We all like music here. We don't all listen to it all the time, but we like music. I'm curious what you guys will think and how our different versions of this will compare. I'll just going to play the first one and then we'll sort of just dip our toes into this and see how it goes. And you should be able to hear this is what I tested earlier.

Okay, there you go. I think I got brain rot. I don't know.

I did. I will say I did try and go very like different with all the music. So some of these I don't like, but I picked it because it was unique and very different from everything else that was on the list already. So I'll go for this because we're

My imagination was just so stupid. It's like, I didn't imagine anything vivid. What I imagined was someone had made like a hyper-involved edit of a rabbit chewing on some grass. And it was just like a bunch of different like overlays and effects. Like...

zoom in on the face of the colors like rainbow shifting out there and it was about to go nuts like it was like the beat was gonna drop and it was gonna oh yeah do you want to hear the drop for your bunny film

There you go. Okay. The bunny is chewing like not very quickly or anything, right? No. Yeah. It's pretty much to the beat. It's like to the beat, but slightly slower than the beat, but the editor is trying to make it work. Oh, okay. Interesting.

Wade, what do you got for me? Where did your mind go? I was in a rom-com with a guy. Okay. The guy and the girl are finally going to the dance together and he goes to pick her up and then they go to the club and all of a sudden the disco ball is going and they start dancing together. So this is like the big scene right before the first big conflict where you think everything's awesome and they're finally getting together and then some... Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is like the...

All right, the date's finally happening. They go to the dance. Everything's going great. Right before, yeah, some horrible thing happens. It causes them to split up until they finally get back together in the end. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Or a rabbit. I didn't go to the rabbit. When he said that, I was like, you know, for what we do for a living, that's where my brain should have gone. I don't know why my brain, that's like so many levels deep of like, it's not a thing. It's an edit of a thing and a boring thing. That's exactly what I was hoping for though, because it needs to,

does that it doesn't just conjure up like oh this sounds like a cheetah it's like it cuts the whole scene of whatever is happening and the context of it the the hyper edit is just perfect i don't watch enough of these types of videos i don't watch brain rot i'm in trouble i don't have you it's just it's not it's all different it's not don't worry uh

Have you guys seen Megalopolis? Probably not. But have you seen it? No, but there are some people that are going to go see it. I don't think I have time to, but because it's like three and a half hours. Have you seen the memes from it? Because there's one specific scene that was living in my head right now. And I literally am restraining myself from constantly using it. It's the one where the girl is like entitled. And Adam Driver just goes, yes, yes, yes. You want to go out to Megalopolis?

The club. It's fucking unhinged. And like, it doesn't, the character doesn't make any sense. Cause as far as I can tell, this character is not like that in any of the rest of the movie. And I can't stop. Every time you guys say anything in my head, I'm like, yeah. So if I say that, I'm really sorry, but also I can't fucking wait to see that horrible movie. I don't know if it's bad, but it's getting really bad. I hear it's, it might be one of the worst, least cohesive movies ever made.

but also something you can laugh at, hopefully. I don't know. Yeah. Anyway, next song. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

All right, I don't want to hear that guy sing. That's fine. But that's the vibe of the song. You can go first this time, Wayne. Okay, I don't know why this is where my brain went, but we're starting off, right? And it's like a country setting. A guy's pulling up like his blue jeans and his cowboy boots, and he grabs a pie and just pies the first woman he walks up to. And then it's a pie to the face thing. I don't know.

But it's just like country boys like oh, where's this going? He's walking for the pretty girl fucking pies are in the face

That's not where I thought that was going to go. I'm going to be honest. I don't know. It's what I pictured. Okay. Okay. What do you got, Mark? Well, mine's cliche and boring. The country threw me off there. Because there's a straight, like, 80s movie music, right? So I was just, like, thinking of that cliche thing in either a rom-com or something where they...

The kid's fixing up his shitty car and trying to, like, hope to impress the girl. And it's just a montage of him, like, messing up, getting oil on himself. Like, oh, it's never going to work. And then he hits it and it starts, you know, but that's so cliche. Where'd the pies come from? I don't know, man. I was watching your face and I saw the moment when the pies happened because you were all...

I was just picturing, I was like, okay, there's like, for some reason, it's a guy like a cowboy outfit. He's walking over. There's the pretty girl. Oh, why'd he do that? I don't know if it's more correct, but I feel obligated to give you pie points. Pie points. You get, you get a country pie point. 3.14 pies. But Mark also gets an 80s montage point. Keep it weird. This one, this one, I think if I remember how it sounds will help with the weirdness. Great.

I decided I can fade fader those out now to make it more pleasant of a cutoff for you. I,

I guess Mark gets to go first on this one. Yeah, I know straight up Charlie Chaplin just in my head, specifically in my head, carrying a bundle of balloons as he was walking down like the streets of some city. And then everything was just like collapsing behind him. But I can't tell if there's a cohesive story there. I think that's just a montage of all of Charlie Chaplin's like stunts where he had things going on behind him.

seems like a silent movie kind of thing just because you can't capture the sounds of all those calamities happening but he's just you know striding down the street with his balloons i couldn't use a couple more like honks and no i can see that what do you got wade you look weird okay man here's the here's the setup snails are bourgeois and slugs are the middle class normal folk like us and

They've been having this feud all movie and the slugs just want to perform, right? They've got this marching band, but they've just never quite been up to snuff. So finally, this song is them coming over the horizon as the sun rises like Spongebob style art. And like the first snail opens up their window and looks out the shutters as the slug marching band comes down. And then as they reach the town, the real music picks up. All the snails are opening their windows, upset.

But they can't even be mad because the slugs are performing so well. That's vivid, man. That's vivid. You jealous? You jealous, Mr. Can't-Imagine-Things? I could not have imagined that even if I was phantasmic. I'm just glad the bourgeois snail's gonna appreciate this. That's when they realize they're all just slimy creatures on the inside. I really had to thank Mark for the rabbits in the first round because it got my brain just going in the weirdest fucking places, apparently. All right.

I almost set my brain up for a weird. I'm ready. Come back to us, man. It's a tough battle, but now all I can see is bourgeois snails. Sorry, Mark. I'm with you on the Charlie Chaplin. Apparently not that much. Don't apologize. Just wait till you hear what's in my brain next. All right. This is going to be kind of a needle drop. I'm going to fade this one in at, I think, the point. This one right here. Let me see. All right.

All right, there we go. I'm first this time? Yes.

Okay, we're in a kitchen and every kitchen appliance that makes something that spins or blends it starts off and you're just watching like something like kind of satisfying as like something spreads out across the pan but as it keeps going it gets faster and faster and shit just starts flying out and ripping and flying and making a messy kitchen.

Okay. I don't want to say it. That's the game. That's the game. So it was like, it was like a dire, it was kind of a tense music. And I just imagined like a sperm cell just, just swimming and all of the other sperm cells are like being destroyed or caught. And it's like, just this one dangerous. Like a top gun plane fight, but with sperm cells.

Yeah.

It just seemed like, you know, because it was like a slow beat, so it couldn't be something super fast, but there was still data. So it just... God, this is way, this is your fault. Hey, man, welcome. I thought food, you thought sperm. All right, Mark, it's a change your sperm point. This is what I thought was going to happen. I love this for us. Next one, Mark goes first. Here we go. Wait, don't think of sperm. Don't think of sperm.

This is not good for the sperm, but that's what's happening.

Okay. I'm sorry, Wade. I guess Mark gets to go first on this one. And I just have quite an idea in there. It's a continuation of the sperm surgery where he looks around and like, where's the egg? Where's the egg? And he realizes that he's not anywhere near where he should be. We're having a through thread now. Oh, God. Oh.

I don't know, man. I just, I don't have anything on that. It's just Mickey Mouse on the back of a semi and like his Fantasia outfit having a duel with Donald Duck on another semi as they round a corner during a storm. God, that's some dark Mickey. I don't know. The sperm had a face and he was just, it was one of those orbit cameras where he's like, it's,

Don't think sperm. Don't think sperm. I'm trying not to. All right. Well, you couldn't possibly think of sperm with this next one, Mark. Wade, go ahead. Enamor me.

Okay, we're starting off at like the gates of this really intricate looking kingdom and the gates open. You're going through slowly like approaching the castle. But as you're approaching the castle, like the intricate realism is slowly becoming a little bit more like animated and cartoony. And then the final doors to the throne room open and it's just fucking couscous. Remember his new groove as that beat drop happens and he's just fucking dancing. Couscous.

Cusco. Cusco. The poison. Poison of Cuscus. Cuscus poison. Crisco, whatever his name is. I was already going there and then that drop happened and I was like, oh, now he's not just being dramatic. Now he's fucking dancing as the doors open. All right. I think. Mark? I totally

tonally that kind of shifted back and forth. Like it was started really like almost sad. And then it went a little bit more optimistic and it was doing this like needle up and down. So I imagine like the hero of whatever story kind of got a war type Kratos ascending some stairs, uh,

either and it would mix between like being a boss confrontation like you know someone that he needs to fight and defeat to a chest because that's why I couldn't tell if it was like something where I was like oh there's a devastating final confrontation to to like oh maybe this is like gonna be the thing that's gonna help him along his journey and then the beat dropped and again yeah it just it just went weird like it was just like all of a sudden they just start dancing I don't know

I like both of those. Can I just say that I immediately saw the sperm? I just imagined he burst into the chamber where the egg was and the opening, the opening bit was like him, like beholding the egg, but then looking around and there's still like sperm carnage happening. And then the chase is like, Oh,

Gotta go. Breaking for the egg again. I'm not gonna lie, at some point it flipped between Kratos and a sperm cell locking up, but I expunged that thought, pushed it out of my mind. My first thought was a sperm swimming to Atlantis. God damn.

And I was like, dude, we got to get away from the sperm. I'm going to go somewhere else. What else can I picture? Atlantis is a good start. Let's picture Atlantis. Don't reject the sperm, boys. I don't remember what this next one sounds like, but there's still a possible way this could incite sperm. ... ... ...

So

Was it me first? Uh, yeah. So this had like a tropical kind of vibe to it, just a little bit of it. So I thought this actually would work as like a scene in Dexter, Murderer Dexter, not Dexter's Lab, where he's cleaning up one of his kills and there's blood all over. And it's like overly cheerful to clash with like the disturbing imagery of the blood and body parts that he's he's gathering up and putting into bags so that he can dispose of. So just a montage again. A lot of these are montage songs for some reason. I like that.

All right. Don't. How could this be about sperm? How?

How? All right. So picture a sperm. Okay. But in black and white. And this sperm wants to be a performer. So it starts off and it's like one of those like high school talent shows where it comes out like on a unicycle. It's like, do-do-do-do-do-do, like riding around in black and white. And then like we cut to the next scene. It's doing a little bit more intricate, like juggling on the unicycle. And then now it's got a cigar in its mouth and it's doing like some light like trapeze acts. And then like, I don't know, by the end, it's just like flailing.

pull out like oh god what's that performance they call everyone's like doing all those sweet fucking trapeze and stuff like in vegas jerk to sell away yeah yeah sperm to soleil uh you know cartoons with big jokes about a flea circus he was like this is a sperm circus i trained my sperm it wasn't alone it was alone at the high school talent show there were others on stage with it as it went on right okay it's it's the the sperm school is that what it is

yes sperm central high talent show mark obviously i was like please think of anything else and then the first thing i thought it was that fucker on another unicycle that fucker on the unicycle that motherfucker piece of shit okay

I don't even have stuff to say. This is just fun. I don't know if this is going to be fun for listeners or watchers, but like I would do this as a pastime. Is this is this enjoyable for you guys? We're going to keep doing it either way. I'm just curious. It's just enjoyable. I'm enjoying it. Yeah, sure. Wish I could think of something other than sperm now. But yeah, it's fun. I believe in you. This next one, I think we'll get away from sperm once and for all.

Nothing's for me about that. It's spooky, because it's October. Who's first on this one? Wade is first. So at first I pictured a lady going down this stone round staircase. And she gets down there and she looks down one of the hallways. And that's when the... starts to happen. And there's like a weird, scary, almost alien face at the end of the tunnel. And then she runs back up the stairs. But now she's like...

just lost in the maze like a hedge maze and the hedge maze opens up at one point and looking down the end of the hallway and she sees the weird alien face but slightly less scary now and then she like turns the corner and she's out of the maze but now she's in like a train tunnel and then there's just like a kind of silly alien face at the end of the tunnel and then she turns her i don't know every time she comes back she goes she's in a different like dark long

hallway of some type and the alien face has somehow gone from scary to like slightly less scary to goofy. This sounds like you're projecting your personal experience of playing horror games onto this song. You played a lot of horror games and they usually involve settings like that, but as you played them, they got less and less scary over time and more goofy. My God, this is therapy session. Secret therapy.

Gotcha. It's like, yeah, these are Rorschach tests. You're schizophrenic, by the way. Let's continue. So this was straight up a scene from Dune or like a teaser trailer for Dune. It started off with like a very low to the ground shot on sand. And you could see them like shimmering as they blew like a gust of wind picked up. And then you saw a foot like step into frame.

And then it cut to a slight, still low, but side shot of the feet moving forward. It's like you see just, like, sand whip by and wisps of, like, their long cloak

drifting in the wind. And then it would cut behind the characters. They're moving forward, slow motion, kind of just like slowly move forward. The thing whipping, you see something out of focus, like in front of them, they're walking towards and you can't quite tell, but you, you, you see like jagged objects and then it would like smash super wide. And it's just this tiny figure walking towards a giant sandworm. That's like just looming over, but he's walking towards it.

And at one point there, it flipped to a sperm cell, a giant sperm cell. Not going to lie, but I expunged it. But then it was like, it was just like, that's where the- Sand sperm! That's where the trailer would end. And it would have like some kind of like dialogue speaking over it. This is why it's a teaser trailer kind of thing, or, you know, a very moment, a very meaningful moment in the show. But yeah, that's- It's funny. I actually hit pause right before there's a vocal track that comes in that goes, ah!

It's crazy that you brought that up. Anyway, that's what I mentioned. Two very different ones. I like that. I could see these things, but not literally because my imagination sucks. Next song. Oh,

This is going to be so strange. I'm first, right? Yes. Yes. I could not imagine anything actually happening, but in my mind was locked the basement stairs to my childhood home. Like there was nothing happening. I wasn't going up and down them, but I every single time I was like, where is this going? It would just snap to another angle or just it wasn't even really the imagery of it. It was just like, this is your childhood basement stairs. Right.

And I couldn't tell you anymore because nothing happened. It was just like basement stairs. That was the only thing.

I had a different reaction than Mark. Okay. It's not Mark's basement stairs. It's not Mark's basement stairs. Okay. It was a black bird with a white chest, always a side profile. You'd see one big eye and the beak cartoon wearing like an inspector gadget jacket and a top hat. And then like the music would do and more birds would come in wearing the same outfit. They'd be scurrying around. And then like, as the thing would slow, they would hop together, get on a bigger jacket and a bigger hat.

And more and more birds kept coming in the same size of the stack. And they would just increase until they were just a giant flock of birds with coats and hat. It's like one of those very satisfying loop videos. It's constantly pushing out and eventually all the birds form into one bird. And then it like starts over with the one bird in the hat. Ah,

man, that's really funny. I Mark, do you have a lot of anxiety tied up to your childhood stairs or something? Well, let's see that. That wasn't the thing. It wasn't the most tense song. It had like a little bit of, it was mostly playful. And I think like what it was like, it's more of a, of a,

goofy kind of song so reminded me of childhood a bit I think so I couldn't tell you why I really couldn't that's why it was such a mystery to me at the same time I was just like why is this not going anywhere but right here I want to play one more and I don't want to sour your opinions on this one but I will say I fucking hate this song music

So

That's pretty much it. I don't know why you ate that. That was pretty cool. I like that. Think about the sounds in the song. Make my whole head hurt immediately. Really? Oh, man. My brain is just like, oh, turn it off. I think you might have infiltrated my thoughts on this because like where my brain went was obtrusive DJ. So there's a guy that's just trying to live his life and he like goes outside and the DJ is just out there. Do, do, do.

And he goes to a hot dog stand. The DJ pops out and starts... Guy's at his own wedding, like, dancing, and then, like, their song's interrupted by the DJ. And then, like, the 8-bit, like, thing that comes in at the end, the... Like, the little bleeping high pitch is him yelling at the DJ, and the DJ just...

And the guy just won't leave him alone. Everywhere he goes in life, the DJ is there fucking playing and the guy can't get away from him. I feel like that was influenced by you saying you hate the songs. I was like, guy who hates DJ. Everyone hates DJs.

What did you see, Mark? I saw, do you guys know Metal Slug? That's, I imagined it was all the characters from Metal Slug, like the main ones that you can play in like a drop ship. It was just a view of them sitting, like checking their weapons, you know, reloading their, their,

their magazines or clips or whatever they and then it was just them sitting and you know the ship would shake every once in a while but it was pretty much just static them prepping to go into battle because it just reminded me of like those arcade games right before the action starts so it just seemed like a loading screen kind of kind of vibe to it even my dj image was like that same art style that

8-bit or whatever it's called. It was so weird when that, it really did crunch down every imagination to just like, oh, this is 8-bit. Yeah, of course it is.

The style I pictured was also that, yeah. Nice, nice. All right, I may have lied when I said one more. I actually forgot I had one more that I had picked as the last one. Oh, liar, liar, pans on fire. That's okay. Anyway, here you go. This is the last one. ♪♪♪

There you go. This, I must be on the arcade kind of a video game vibe. This was literally the background music of a Mega Man level. So all I could see is just like, it's just looping. It goes through, you're playing through the level. There's nothing like that's going to the music specifically. It's just a stage. This is the music in that stage. And you're just like going through and playing. It was fun.

This is like an 80s or 90s commercial that's like the overdramatic like cool kid walking around looking completely fucking absurd because the thing that's advertising is like the new yo-yo. But everyone's like stopping and turning as the kid walks by like their sunglasses are dropping. There's some like kids fighting on the side of a road sitting there like arguing and bickering but the cool kid walks by with the yo-yo or whatever and they both stop and it's like the top down view they're going like, whoa.

And just every scene is like something you wouldn't expect or like a scene that doesn't make sense. And this kid's probably like 10 years old, but everyone's stopping to look at how cool they are with the new thing. I appreciate that. Can you play it again? Yeah. Unfortunately, we don't. Oh, God.

I thought you had a button prepared for in case Mark asked for a replay. Unfortunately, no, I understand. I understand. That's, that's fair. That's very fair. Actually, this is, I will say the ad played because this is on soundcloud. This was actually written by Mandy's brother. Uh,

and the name of this track is distractible podcast theme song. Back when we were coming up with the idea for this show, Mandy's brother, Eric makes music. And I was like, what if he made the podcast theme? And we ended up not using it, but this is technically, this is the distractible podcast theme song. Yeah.

It's a bop. I mean, it is video gamey, but also that's one of the main things he's done is he writes, has written music for indie games that his friends and people he does have produced and stuff. So yeah, SoundCloud. Maestro Oak on SoundCloud. There's your free plug, Eric.

was not free and made this song, but that was a long time ago. Three and a half years ago, probably that was made. Anyway, good work guys. That was fun for me. I hope it was fun for everyone else. I don't really care if it was fun for you too, but listeners and watchers, I hope it was fun for you. Now it's time to do that thing where we tally the points and who I say first has no bearing on who actually wins the episode. Okay. So we're switching it up now.

Mark, you earned points for Blue's Clues, In and Out of House, Birthday Points, Good Tripod, Brain Rot Rabbit, 80s Montage, Danger Sperm, Sperm Part 2, Dexter's Tropical, Dune Trailer, and Childhood Basement Stairs, giving you a total of 11 points. Wade, you earned points for Hating Jack Black, No House Tree,

Standing desk in air quotes, country pies, bourgeois snails, dark Mickey, couscous dance, Cirque de Sperm Lay, secret therapy, 10 birds in a trench coat, intrusive DJ and the 90s cool kid commercial. Giving you a total of

Of 12 points and making you today's winner. Yes! So I had no bearing, huh? Oh, I just, I had to mix it up. I threw it out there that I was going to mix up the order, but then I remixed up the order and I really got you on that one. I knew the moment Mark's name came out first, I'd come out on top.

Is this my winner's speech time? Because I don't want that to be my winner's speech. Yeah, no, that's your whole winner. That was your winner's speech. No, I guess you could have an official. Make a winner's speech, Wade. Congratulations. Aha, I win. Mark, loser's speech. That's not it. No, that's it. Good speech, Mark. Thank you.

Look, this, this episode cost me a lot. Um, my, my sanity, uh, my imagination and, the respect of my peers and, uh, people that watch my content because now they appeared inside my mind and they will be forever changed for peeking into the beyond. Yeah. It's terrifying. There's a lot of sperm in there. Anyway, congratulations to Wade, uh, listeners, watchers, make sure you check us out. Uh,

on our socials and whatnot. Smarks, Markiplier, the way this Lord minion 777 or minion 777. I am ice cream. We have merch distractible store.com and make sure you follow because then you'll get notified that there is that when it happens, I mean, it's Mondays and Fridays, but somehow people still forget that.

and uh oh yeah the video it's only on spotify if you want to watch the video and see the exact moment where mark realizes how obsessed with sperm he truly is you could watch that only on spotify i was gonna mock you bob i was like oh so i do a drawing episode for the watchers and i'm the bad guy but bob does this episode where we have to listen yeah the watcher got nothing out of this episode wait everyone listens everywhere don't they

Take that, idiots. Anyway, thanks for playing along. This was very fun. I hope everyone enjoyed it. And until next time, podcast out.