199 - Demo Matt Quits YouTube, Police Mishaps & Unsub At The Pentagon? | Unsubscribe Podcast 199
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You can't find me a jury of my peers. My peers get out of it. What's kind of consensual? It's where it's very hard for your attorney. Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous. Brandon, his hair is fucking fabulous. Don't I? A dark joke disposition. And there's a fat electrician. Welcome to Unsubscribe.

Well, we can just start it right. Ready? Three, two, one. Oh, he's in the eye. Oh, gosh. This has been a minute. A second. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Doubletap, Nick, Pet Electrician, Brandon Herrera, myself, Donut Operator. Thank you so much for being here. And before you fucking ask, we didn't coordinate shirts, so please stop. Let me see your phones.

This is a picture of Cody in a mirror. No, no, no. Roll one. Roll one. You guys are wearing matching shirts. Yeah. God, even now. You've been around us since 11 a.m., dude. I've been drunk since 7, so...

uh tyler running in him today like tyler just when he came up today he was like i'm gonna be honest i just now found out cody and brandon are different people we weren't on that podcast no so yeah i was like oh that's hilarious holy speaking of shot show

I think that was we did that in the SHOT Show episode where that guy can or was convinced he came up to you convinced that you were me yeah he gave me a challenge coin it's like Brandon thank you for so much I was just like yeah turns around sees you oh fuck the best one we did talk about you weren't there but when they thought you were Brandon Herrera oh you don't know about this story no what happened at the USCCA thing when you were there we were

What's up? He was there, right? Oh, God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't know about this story that happened to you. Oh, no. I was there for that. Yeah. I'm fucking... I'm so tired, dude. Yeah, where they thought I was Brandon Herrera for the whole time. The lady? Yeah. That went after you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. My son loves you. He's a huge fan of AKs. Keep doing what you're doing in Texas. That's the thing. I was like... He lives in Iowa. I didn't know.

That was the first time I think that will, and probably the last time that will happen. Me and Brandon, a lot of physical characteristics in common. Yeah. I mean, if you count the f***ing ink, I mean, you're kind of brown. That's fair. How you doing, Nick? Welcome back. We've been chaotic. This is, when was the last time you were in Texas?

It's been months. Range day, probably. Yeah, range day was the last time I was in Texas because then it was the tour and then Vegas for a SHOT show. And now I'm here. Speaking of range day, our boy Matt, he's peacing out. I know. Thankfully, we'll have a closeout episode with him on Monday. Monday, we'll film that. That'd be a good one. We...

15 years. How long did he do it for? Forever. Since like, I don't know what, like 2007. It was pre-Google owning YouTube. I know that. Yeah. He, uh, I'm fucking proud of our boy though. Like he, like the way he's going out, he's like, man, I just, I want to, I've made my millions. I just want to watch my kids grow up. Like, that's just a, such a good attitude, man. He's living the dream. And for most of the internet, they, no, fuck him. Yeah. More content. Like some of the comments. It's like, whoa.

like i took out a pretty big loan to buy into bunker branding but like the whole like i'm dead serious like the whole the whole reassuring thing to me was like the like the second or third time i ever talked to matt i was like hey man i'm in town uh can we come talk about this and he's like he's killing me i fly out i fly in friday night i fly out monday morning at like 6 a.m you want to get together and he's like i'm really sorry man i can't weekends are for my family and i was like

I respect it. I like that. So no, it was awesome. My, my first story or the first time I ever came out to Bernie to go hang out with, uh, with Matt, I remember it was, uh, it was right after he fully like, and he'll, he said this to me, like in the beginning, he's like, I totally ripped your AR guys versus AK guys that you did with you, Eli. Um,

And he was like, he texted me. He's like, hey, I got this number from a friend. Hopefully this isn't awkward. I totally stole your video. And meanwhile, I was like a nobody YouTuber. I was like, that's so fucking cool. Devil Ray stole my video. And he was like, yeah, do you want to come out and like, we'll do like another variation or whatever. I'm like, yeah, dude, like, just let me know and I'll, I'll, I'll be there. And after we filmed, like normally, like I had already met you at this point and like a bunch of other shit. Like I,

I figured like, oh, we go out, like, you know, have a couple of drinks or whatever. We went to, uh, I think it was like Cibolo Creek Brewing in Bernie, which like now I know, but back then it was like, oh, crazy. We did trivia night and he had two beers over like three hours. He's like, whoa, shouldn't be driving home. Like just complete family man, like opposite end of the spectrum of the dichotomy of YouTubers. Yeah.

We did a celebratory shot when I became part owner of Bunker and it was fireball. Can you do fireball? Yeah.

I'll survive. I'll make it. I'll survive. His fascination with Fireball will never not be funny to me. Is his character a college chick? I think so. The most wholesome gun YouTuber for sure.

He's such a good dude. He was like the first time cursing. Like, I think we had the first curse. I think so. Ever said on the, on the internet. Yeah. Frick. Frick. Yeah. He said, Frick like, Oh my God. But he started ranting about Jews. That was really uncomfortable. We had to cut that segment. He's like, no, I'm retiring. He can't defend himself. So we need to control his narrative. Now we get to make up our own mat. Yeah.

Let me tell you guys why he's retiring. Monday when he shows up for his retirement episode, we should just have a Burger King crown there for him. Did you want to wear this? For no reason in particular? Wait, wait. Why don't you want those people on this plane, Matt? That what or who? I...

Oh, my God. He's going to kill us. We love Carriker, dude. He's like him and Kentucky Ballistic Scott. They're probably two of the most wholesome people I've ever met. Scott, I don't cuss when I'm on the phone. Heck yeah, man. I catch myself being a better version of myself talking to him, and then it goes away the second I hang up that phone. I was like, ooh, that was difficult. He'll be talking about somebody he's actively fucking beefing with, and he'll just be like, man, he's just...

God, that guy's just so silly. Yeah. He's so stinking. Oh, I'm angry. And he looks like he could club you to death with his hands. Yeah. He bench presses like 500 pounds. He's a humongous human being. Have you seen his dad? The genetics? Yes. And his brother. They both came out for tiny guns. All three of them were like, hi, I'm Nick. Hi, I'm Nick. They're not even that tall. They're just fucking wide. Dude, his dad is like 60 and looks like.

a 30 year old body builder. Yeah. That weighs like 280 pounds at five. Only time he's ever hit me up first was like, Hey Nick, this might be weird, but when you come out and we do a video together, would you, would you mind saying hi to a kid from my church? He's a really big fan of yours. I was like, sure, man. No problem. He's such a good dude. I love it. Even demo. He's missed the, on the podcast. He had to leave. We got him.

Too drunk, I think, for softball practice. He was doing something for the kid who was like, I have to call out. I am not going to be able to do soccer coaching or whatever it was. It was one of the episodes where I'm shit-wrecked. He does have a good time with us. Yeah, he's always understood the work-life balance side of things. And I think that's where this is coming from, which is honestly really good for him, man. A lot of people have been, I mean, even your guys, like how long you've been in the game, you two, like Nick's still a fresh whip of snapper just...

Hungry. I started my current channel in 2014. Yeah. Yeah, I'm like 2017.

Yeah, I've been doing it for a minute now, buddy. Somebody found my high school YouTube channel the other day, so I had to go through and private all the videos. What was on it? There was like a couple of my jiu-jitsu. Today we're talking about Mexican. Whoa! Today we're going to talk about wooden doors. Oh, shit, Nick. Goddamn. No, it was just like a bunch of jiu-jitsu tournaments and shit.

that i'd competed in i had all the footage up and then like a couple of skits i filmed when i was in high school for like videography class and somebody what kind of skits emailed me the links they were just like goofy like uh like super super knockoff version of whitest kids you know vibe and uh they just emailed me the links like hey bro i found this i was like private all those videos reply fuck you

We did private everything. There was one pretty good video where one of my friends in high school dressed up like a banana and I dressed up like a gorilla and it was just me chasing him through stores and shit in town tackling him in aisle 7. What year was this? It was like 2010. Yeah, that sounds like 2010 YouTube. Whatever, Raquel.

I don't think anything will ever beat finding your Nickelodeon ads. Yeah, you know what? No one's found my original YouTube channel. Did you see that your Wikipedia page was updated by that, by the way? No, Jesus. Did you do it? No, I didn't do it, but it was posted on the Unsub subreddit. You have a Wikipedia? He has a Wikipedia page, and the introduction section was updated that he first found his fame in doing advertisements for Nickelodeon digital blah, blah, blah, and they linked the...

videos on youtube somebody posted the subreddit like y'all are autistic what the fuck does a guy have to do to get a wikipedia page at this point my god i don't do you not have one i don't nick do you have one i don't how do we make one jake what is the how do you make i you've already done it they're gonna they're gonna be up by the time this episode's over i promise

Is it? Yo, you have a Wikitubia. I have a Wikitubia? Oh my god. I have? No, I did see that the other day because I was applying for press credentials for the White House. And they asked if I had a Wikipedia and I looked for it. I'm like, I don't, but I linked that instead. I am referenced on several historical findings on Wikipedia, however. Oh? Yeah.

high points of my career. Yeah, me and Pewview are linked on Carlos Hathcock's Wikipedia page for proving that you can, in fact, shoot through a scope. And I'm also, I think, last time I checked, I was linked on Sergeant Reckless's Wikipedia page because I was technically the one that pointed out that Sergeant Reckless, the Marine horse, was, in fact, the first ever gender reveal party thrown by the Marine Corps. God, people are...

I love all of you. You're also terrifying if we fuck up in any way possible. You are now listed under the Wikipedia for gender reveal. I'll take it. Cody, what happens? I have, I'm a TV personality. Donut. It's like rocket jump. So that is old IMDB. Old IMDB. Cody is. Dude, you have a full ass Wikipedia, dog. Cody's got a full Wikipedia page. Hey.

I love how Gara, also known as Donut Operator, is racist. That's it. Yeah. It's just one sentence. While we're here, let me talk about minorities for a minute. Oh, God. Wow, they cited every time. Dude, the Digital Blue's still here. Cody's start to media was in 2002 in a commercial, notably the Digital Blue Digital Movie Creator commercial. Straight up.

Is that actual Wikipedia? That is actual Wikipedia. Oh my god, yes it is. That is the first thing it says about our boy. Mine is Brandon Herrera YouTuber with a very suspicious my heart goes out to you looking photo. And then people also search for Cody Garrett and Tony Gonzalez. Now I'm actually wondering, Cody, you're worth... These are my favorites. You're worth $3 million? Mm-hmm.

Oh, you're a 2 million, a former SWAT team member and police officer who has a net worth of 2 million. Doll hairs. Doll hairs. What metric are we, which, which, which, which website are we using? That one's a, that's a resourceful one. Famous birthdays.com. So deep diving that information. Social blade. Super accurate. All over the fucking social blade says I'm worth like 30 million. It's like, God damn. Yeah.

Nick, fat electrician. You don't have anything yet, Nick? Nope. What's your net worth? I don't know. I'm not keeping track. Well, they are. Pretend. Allegedly. Allegedly. These are my favorite things. Dang, that was your average retention. What? Is that? What? Oh, your average length. I thought that was your retention. I was like, how the fuck do they got that data? This is riveting content. I know. Like, weee.

I'm trying to wake up right now. We did cooking yesterday. We got what Tyler's episode. You're filming your witch gun tomorrow. So tomorrow we're going to be doing a video with, I think we're, we're doing the, uh, this is like a Googleable thing, which is my favorite part. I got my hands on one of the AK slash PPSH 41 hybrids where somebody made a, an AK it's functionally, it is an AK 47 and,

uh but it's got the front shroud of a ppsh and is like the most cursed shit ever i like it nick likes it i think that's a terrible i think it's cool as fuck that's a gun where if you're like what if world war ii lasted five more years that's the gun that the germans would be running around with i think it looks neat oh shit what the tell me that's not right

It looks cooler than a regular- Chase, pull that shit up. Okay? How hot does that f***ing shroud get? Probably not at all. Oh, really? I would assume. That's definitely like German and Russian had a thing together. Well, they're both Russian, but- Oh, they are? It was called the Ribbentrop Molotov Pack. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the fuck. I forgot. Yeah. Oh, that actually looks sick with the drum. I didn't see that. See? Told ya. That- Ah, f***. I hate that I like that. Yeah.

But it's just a weird looking fucking gun. And this was like a meme. This is like a cursed gun. Like it's been on the internet for 20 years. And I just so happened to see one on Gun Broker. And I was like, mine. There was like 20 ever made. Did you get a good deal? It wasn't bad because I don't think anybody fucking wants them. I'm like, I'm retarded enough to want that. And then we finally, I agreed not to paint if Brandon makes me a gun, not to paint it finally. And then I'll get a seat.

I won't paint it. No, I won't. I'm over the painting phase. I have all my pink guns I need and my Call of Duty guns. I think they're maxed out, so now it's like I want Brandon to design his autistic level of detail gun. There's been like a podcast cold war where I've given everyone on the podcast a gun, but Eli's like, you know, I'm just going to make it pink in anime. And I'm like, no. Steal me. Oh, did you see the...

The thing I... Dude, that was... Yeah, your Christmas present finally showed up. What is it? His Christmas present finally showed up the other day to the podcast house. The fucking hand of the God. Oh, shit. Oh, that's cool. It's like the berserk, the hand that comes off. Yeah, with the bailiff right there. Yeah. That's where Griffith was born. Spoiler alert.

He's a good guy. Spoiler alert. He's a good guy. He does lots of great things. He's a great person. He's cool. Am I right? Dude, I was like, what the fuck? This is dope as shit. And then you got the mask from... We're going to hang on that. Yeah, dude. Alex the Terrible sent me one of the masks from Slaughter to Babel. And it's got the Bizarre symbol on it, the brand on it.

Yeah. We got some cool friends. Oh, and then I hung up young Billiam's things real quick. You pinned it with NAMMs? Yeah, I was like, what do we have extra of? NAMMs. Brandon has so many NAMMs. It became a meme because, you know, that's your medal that you won. Yeah, I got one NAMM. I've got like nine. Billiam has two. Brandon has fucking nine NAMMs now. Navy Achievement Medal.

Billion, dude. Look at this little dick. Also, we'll get a shadow box for it. Make it all nice. But our friend Cody Garrett flipping off a literal infant. He's like, he didn't earn them goddamn names.

Live from Radio City Music Hall, it's the SNL 50 Homecoming Concert featuring performances by Arcade Fire, The B-52, Backstreet Boys, Bad Bunny, Bonnie Raitt, Brittany Howard, Brandi Carlile, Chris Martin, Dave Grohl, David Byrne, Devo, Eddie Vedder, Jack White, Jelly Roll, Lady Gaga,

Jesus Christ. These are always fun episodes, though, because we just do the boys. We don't have to worry about a fucking guest dynamic or anything. We just catch up with our friends. Who were you talking with the other day about being in war at the age of nine? Was that with you guys? What?

No, that was Unkind of Consensual. That was... Bro, tell... So we were bullshitting Unkind of Consensual and the youngest... What's Unkind of Consensual? It's the exclusive... It's where you... It's where you... Well... You remember two nights ago...

No, that's the exclusive podcast for Pepperbox for me, Eli, Angry Cops, and Habitual Line Crosser. But I forget what we were talking about, but we ended up talking about being young in war, and I brought up General Clem. General Clem was literally a drummer boy in the Civil War that took shrapnel, and then a Confederate officer demanded that he surrendered, so he killed him at the age of 12.

And he was an NCO by the time he was... 13, right? Yeah, it was like... That was, I think, 12. He was an NCO. Hold on, back up the surrender thing. Who killed who? Do what? The drummer boy at the age of 12 killed a Confederate officer that demanded that he surrendered. So he became an NCO. Fuck, well. And then he stayed in the military until 1915 and retired as like a three-star general. Which, to be fair, in the American military, good time to retire. Like...

But imagine like at 18, you're 18 and you're joining this 12 year old's like, hey! Lock it up. You're like, what the fuck, bro? Boys, line up! Getting suited up for like World War I. And like, bro, General Clem was a drummer boy in the Civil War. He was an NCO at nine.

And it's like, you're joining at 18. It's like, bro had nine years in the military and confirmed kills already. Jesus Christ. He took shrapnel, right? I think he took shrapnel as a drummer boy and then killed a Confederate officer. Nine and 12. War is heck, my boy. John, listen up. I was like, man, my kids have no excuse. General Clem.

You're all worried about your Roblox. This fucking kid's getting it. I don't know. Fuck these kids. And then meanwhile, fucking Eddie Gallagher gets in trouble for a 17-year-old with an AK-47 as a child. I mean, Cody did a good story on that one. I saw Eddie at SHOT Show. Yeah, got to say hey to him, chill with him for a couple of minutes. Yeah, yeah.

Good guy. Good guy. That was one of the first times I seen how like media can spin shit in a, if you know what you're looking at, you automatically it's like, Oh, these just lower enlisted that doesn't like what they were. They hated their leader. And a couple of them just like, Oh, let's get them back. You just read the paperwork. It's like, we messed with his optics every day. I would have known like, if you're a sniper at his level, when you go out to shoot your weapon or train, you're like, huh? That's weird.

Every time I'm shooting it, it's not zeroed. Yeah, if I remember correctly, he was one of the first Navy people to pass Marine Corps sniper school. So like if someone fucks with your optic in a theater and he had been doing it for years, you're probably going to see that someone with your optic. I also really cannot imagine the thought process of this guy is my overwatch. Let me make him worse at killing the guys who are shooting at me.

That's a whole thing, man. Scoring privates. I mean, enlisted. E4, E5, I think, was what they were at. But it was two, and then the biggest thing was Jag with the Trojan that they sent. That's the fucking wild thing. You know that? They got dismissed because they're legal. Not any team. The Navy's team. Yeah, the fucking Jag dudes or whatever they fucking are.

the uh to quote pete hegseth the jagoffs yeah the jagoffs would you like to explain what that is i don't think i need to to be honest with you i think the men and women watching know what they know what that means yeah dude they put a fucking thing to quote the secretary of defense god i love this timeline i don't think i need to well it's like one of the big things that because i did a video about eddie gallagher back in the day and

was talking about like the, the main way for the Jag offs to get medals or to go forward with promotions is to get prosecutions. And so they were like working really hard to prosecute him, whether it was right or wrong. This is to a point they did not give a fuck. They were like, we are prosecuting this dude no matter what. And then, yeah, they put the Trojan horse in the emails. Yeah.

And they actively were trying to spy on his defense.

like on his defense prosecutors and things like that and yeah they see it they go and like what the fuck is this this is a trojan sent through they sent a trojan to spy on us to see what we're doing which is a type of virus you're tracking everything your spot it's illegal especially yeah with for court proceedings yeah so they get that and they're like what do they call that fruit of the poison tree yeah yeah yeah fruit of the poisonous tree

So it's like if there's one wrong thing in the beginning of a prosecution, none of the other shit matters. It's admissible.

So, yeah, they walked in, they found the Trojan, like, "Yo, what the fuck is this?" And they're like, "Wait, this is from that team." Please say "Trojan horse" because when you say they found a Trojan, it really just sounds like a condom. Oh, they found his condoms. A virus. A spyware on an email attached and they kept it just attached so when they went in, they're like, "Hey, they're spying on us." Like, what the fuck? Is this true? Ugh.

We'll drop everything. No one got in trouble though. That's the crazy thing. Like no one, that entire prosecution team did not get in trouble. This is my issue with like the current legal system and like prosecutors in general, like prosecutors have way too much power as far as just like, I want to go after you or I don't, you know what I mean? Like you can, you can get away with like,

pretty probably pretty blatant murder in like florida in a self-defense shooting just because that's how the prosecutors in florida interpret it versus like california you could have a hundred percent justified self-defense shooting and they're coming after you for murder just because that's how the prosecutor feels about it you're about to get me on my soapbox but i think that's all let's go i'm here for it

No, okay. I just saw Cody do the Henry Cavill arm wrinkle. Let's go. I want to hear it. Daniel Penny. Yeah. Fucking New York. You had a guy who was threatening old women and other people on the train. He put him in a chokehold. The guy just happened to fucking die. And then he was drug through the fucking dirt for months. Because Homeboy was saying, like, somebody on this train is going to fucking die. Yeah, he was like, someone's going to fucking die. I mean, he was right.

Somebody's going to. Oh, my God. He could read the future. Like if that happened, read the future. If that happened in Texas. Yeah. Like any prosecutor in Texas. Hopefully any prosecutor, except for some in Austin, they probably would have been like, yeah. Okay. Yeah. He was completely taking care of the women and the children and the people on that train.

But in New York, if you choke some dude out who's threatening young poor people, like old people, and no, he gets put in fucking prison the next day. It worked out. I've brought this up before, but I'm so close to Minnesota. It's an issue because you go to Minnesota so much and they don't recognize a concealed carry permit and they have super strict gun laws. And in Minnesota, there was a court case I was following where

A woman was at home alone with her kids and she heard something in her garage. So she grabbed her gun, went out to her garage to investigate. And it was a burglar that then attacked her and she shot him and killed him.

Good. Prosecuted for murder because it was a detached garage. Oh, fuck you. She didn't have the legal. She had a duty to retreat and she shouldn't have went out there and got in the first place. Dipshit. Dipshit attorney that was just like, oh, well, by technicality. Well, are you not looking at the fact that a woman was defending her?

house and family that's my whole thing is like i almost don't think that plea deals should be a thing because plea deals are literally just like oh i'm an attorney with a 98 conviction rate blah blah blah and if i let somebody off with a plea deal that ruins their life even though i know they're innocent i'm gonna get them to plead guilty and lose gun rights and have to be on probation instead then i get to maintain my fucking record or whatever cody's about to

I want to hear it. The angry old man episode. I like it. The other subway thing that just happened, man. You had these five dudes. Daniel Penny part two. Yeah, well, you had these five dudes. He's back on the subway. He went back down and choked somebody else out.

There was a subway as a New York, of course, a New York City fucking subway again. And you had these five guys. They went and they stole a homeless man fell asleep and they went and they stole his bag. So he wakes up, he hits one of them. He just like slashed him across the mouth.

And so they beat the fuck out of him and he falls down and then they go to their car with his bags and he goes back to retrieve his bags and they start punching him in the back of the head. And so he pulls out a knife and he stabs two of them, kills one of them.

And they fucking arrested him and everything was fine. They're like, yeah, this is total self-defense. But his attorney, you remember that attorney on that video I showed you? The attorney said, it's a garden variety robbery and he turned it into a murder. The prosecutor. Oh, God. Yeah, the attorney of one of the guys that robbed him. Right, right, right. He was like, this was just a garden variety robbery. Why did he have to hurt someone? Like the sheer...

fact that someone has to say garden variety robbery that is so fucking related to that next level he was just going to take us back and leave versus the idea and a lot of people I know California they have that duty to retreats yeah

Yeah. Some states and not in others, but with the duty of retreat, it is. And you get to see it. I got a run. I got to get out. Even I have a gun. They're breaking in. My job is to get my family out. Run away. I want them. I don't necessarily think that that's true for your, your domicile. No, God,

- California has a problem right now. - Traditional castle doctrine, if you are in your residence where you sleep, you can defend yourself. But California, I don't think recognizes castle doctrine to that degree. And California has a duty to retreat. So you literally have to be backed into a corner with no reasonable exits.

before you're allowed to fire. Because I know that there's certain other states too where it's like, even though they recognize castle doctrine, if you're in public, let's say, you get into an altercation in public and somebody pulls out a knife, you have a duty to try to get out of the situation, legally speaking, before you're allowed to shoot the person. Which is f***ing insane. Like I said, it depends on what state you're in, which is f***ed up, dude. Appropriate. I feel like if someone steals a f***ing candy bar from me, I should be able to kill you.

I'm sorry, that's mine. The thing that drives me crazy when people make that argument, they're like, oh, so you're saying that somebody's life is less valuable than your stuff? I'm like, no, it's not what I said. What I said was, the minute you're willing to take my stuff, the life of someone who's willing to steal my shit is worth less than my stuff.

Yeah, exactly. Makes perfect sense. You made that decision, not me. Yeah, you killed yourself. The minute you tried to break into my... You made that decision. Appropriate force in self-defense is the one California has weird. They get tied up a lot of times. It's like, well, they didn't... You had a gun, they had a knife. That was...

You used more, um... That's the dumbest thing on the planet. Sorry, I'm better at it. You want to know the... Knives are fucking terrifying. Knives are fucking terrifying. The mall video where the guy gets it in the fucking throat and, like, you just... Yeah, I've only done, I don't know, 1,022 videos on this. Yeah, a knife is fucking dangerous. You get a poke, like you were talking, the mall video, the dude just went, boop.

And the guy was dead in 30 seconds. The guy was dead the moment that knife left. You can't stop it. You're screwed. You want to know the hardest marketing campaign of all time? Samuel Colt, when he came up with the revolver. Colt's marketing campaign after Colt came up with the revolver. This is the first time that it became practical to stray away from...

You know what I mean? So the market was the Colt Patterson. I believe it was like 1841 or some shit like that really early. Their marketing slogan when the revolver came out was God created man. Samuel Colt made them equal. And it's the hardest marketing campaign of all time.

That makes me think of... That's awesome. What's the Last Samurai? Remember Tom Cruise, the first of it? Yeah. I think that was what he was marketing then. Oh, yeah. The repeating rifle. Yeah. He's just like, shit wreck. I haven't seen that in a while, man. Wasn't he like a little bighorn survivor or something like that? Yeah. Yeah. He went through a lot. Which I didn't realize until recently. That Red Dead video I did where like the...

We had one of the, what was it? The Springfield Trapdoors? Yeah.

I had the same ejector malfunction or extractor malfunction. Like, it broke the gun. And everybody in the comment was like, that's what lost Little Bighorn. It's straight up the same malfunction. They're like, yep. No, no, that's not your reproduction. That just happens. Dude, that day was probably supposed to be like two hours of film an hour. And then all the old guns were having every fucking issue. Brandon would go to do something. He'd be like, and it's not working again. C96 don't fucking work. The fuck?

trapdoor don't fucking work have you guys seen american primeval no dude it's a new it's like it's not a series it's like well it is like a series but like it's over it was like a one and done six episode thing like kind of like how hbo does it but netflix did it and it was american primeval about the west and westward expansion and like i've talked about this a little bit before where it's like

One religion doesn't really get their own state unless they did some sketchy shit during westward expansion. Talking about Utah in particular. Which state could that be? The mountain Jews. The entire series is about a big caravan of pilgrims moving west and they get attacked by the Mormon church dressed up as Native Americans on horseback. Yeah.

And then the army trying to prove that the Mormons did it while also like dealing with potentially the native Americans doing it. So like, there's like three entities, like the native Americans are trying to prove the Mormons did it. The army is just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. It's like, it's a really good series, but the Mormon church is pissed about it because they kind of like, they told what happened. Right. Well, that like, they like slandered, I forget his name, but he's like the second prophet of the Mormon religion. Bring him young.

I don't know, but they like kind of slandered his name and the Mormon church is like, well, I mean, it's kind of accurate, but we apologize for that. Also, that guy was pretty cool. They're really pissed off about it, but it's a really good series.

Yeah, I know. I saw a comment on Pepperbox that got pissed at us for saying mountain Jews. Really? I was like, dude, you know, first of all, I find that phrase hilarious. Second of all, the person I learned that phrase from is a mountain Jew. Is a Jew. Yeah. In the presence of a Mormon. Yeah. And I thought it was the funniest shit in the world. Like...

How can you get fucking mad at that? You think it's funny. It's really not. I'm like, I don't think you can tell me what's funny. He couldn't have said that. I was like, well, he was allowed to say that. Dude, that is hilarious reading that story of all that because I filmed that video and I know everything. Did you really? I didn't know that part.

I watched all that. Do we want to give a little background for... The background is... What was the article? There was a lawsuit. Yeah, a lawsuit. A lawsuit against Black Rifle. And it was one of my favorite things I've ever read. Yeah, because you had the hardest fucking YouTube video title in the history of YouTube. I remember opening up YouTube and...

Having to pull over, I was laughing so hard because I couldn't believe you did that. I called him and he didn't pick up so I sent it anyway. It was a gun meme review called Evan Hafer doesn't want your butthole.

It was just about the black rifle lawsuit because some guy was going after him. They ended up making up. Everything was fine. They're homies now. I mean, good, but people were like, oh, can you believe all this shit happened? And reading shit like, I'm reading this about my friends. Like about Evan and Matt Best and shit like that. And the only thing going through my head the entire time I'm reading it is,

This all happened. Every line of this is true. I can see it happening. And I'm like, I'm just thinking of it in my head. I'm like that, that,

That happened. All of those checks. Does that not sound like us just bantering in the room? Nobody means anything by it. If you pulled anything we said out of context, never happened to me before. If you pull anything we say out of context, it sounds terrible, but you're just bantering with the guys. Dude, that's why I'm reading that lawsuit. I was like, oh, I filmed that video. That's not what happened.

Huh. We forced him to strip. I don't remember any of that part. They were very excited to be in this video. It was Hot Dog Party 2 was the title of that video. I remember shooting that dumbass commercial. Not helping your case. Yeah.

And we did it. This is the small office. This is before it went to the big office. This is a tiny little office. Oh, yes. The cult classic Hot Dog Party 2. After, no one can forget Hot Dog Party 1, which needed a sequel. This time it's personal.

I remember filming that. It was just everyone's in the bathroom, shirtless and no pants. They have underwears and they're working out. And that's when I opened the door. I remember that video. Yeah, and then I closed it. People just really don't understand. Like the military, LEO, whatever. Like that sense of humor is just so different, dude. And that was reading a lawsuit. That was not how that. Okay, well.

I'm not on Joseph Smith's plates. Dude, if you're laughing, you're not crying. That's how we all deal with shit. Also, a lot of really gay humor. Just a smidge amount. I think the direct quote from Evan Hafer was, what if we close this door and butt the shit out of each other? This is a man who is married with children.

And this is very much one of many Evan. A bunch of these, a bunch of these kids who like have never bantered like that. And you're just like, Oh, so he's gay. It's like, no, no,

Which led to the title, "Evan Hayford Does Not Want Your Butt Home." I just like you gave him laser eyes. And I put the fucking, the eye-funny hands. The funny part is like, I like, this was like my, around the time of like my second or third trip down to San Antonio. So like, I'm new, new to this world. Then I was like, I can't do anything or I'm going to get in trouble. And then, open YouTube, first recommendation.

Evan Hafer doesn't want your butthole. He called me after that video went live and I was just like, oh, hey, sorry, dude. Like I had to send it. It was getting late and he was just like, yeah, I watched your video. It's pretty fucking funny. Evan left. That's the terrifying part with California law. Read that out loud. That's that's the second part. This is back to gun laws. Yeah. Just a real quick. Why the California law is scary. You are not required to retreat from a fight.

If reasonably believed you or someone else is in imminent danger, the force you use must be proportional to the threat. Yeah. If you cannot retreat. If you're a 120 pound woman with kids and a 250 pound man with a machete comes after you, you're only allowed to use knives. You're allowed to deploy your own 250 pounds.

Oh, there it is. There is when the force used is reasonable and escape is not a bout.

uh, by the option. You just keep them in your closet. Part of the, that's so stupid. You're trapped in the corner and you have to use proportionate force when you're trapped. So somebody can break into your house. Not only do you get to break into my house while I'm sleeping, you get to choose the weapons. So if you're a master, this,

sword fighter. You get to come in with a sword and I'm not allowed to just Indiana Jones your ass is absurd. That's so f***ing stupid. I'm going to break this f***ing down. If you have a f***ing weapon in my house and I don't know you, you're going to die. If you're in my house, you're going to die anytime.

Probably shooting you. I'm gonna ask one question: "Hi, who are you?" Then depending on your response, if you're confused... Or if you're confused, "Mah!" Waking up to go get water at 3 AM. "That's new." Boom! Fuck.

Sorry. You're going to die, dude. It's funny. Asking them who they are is called due process. I know, but I would have to say that I asked. I would never tell the cops I said that. Did you say anything? No. Let me teach you guys out there in the audience something. It's called I was scared for my life. That's it. I feared for my life. Yeah. Which, I mean, to be fair, if there's a stranger in your living room at three o'clock in the morning, yeah, I fear for my life too. Yep.

Also, you're going to eat seven rounds of 8-6 Blackout. I'm going to fear for my life for a second. I'd be so angry. Now I'm going to fear for my carpet cleaning bill. Literally what I'd be most mad about. I'd be like, fuck, I have to stay up now an extra couple hours while this gets sorted. My 8-6 is getting checked out. I fear for my circadian rhythm. Because I'm going to have to...

Stay up all night dealing with paperwork associated with what just happened. So how are you handling? I don't the staining is not cool. Yeah I was out of extra panels of the wood flooring and now I'm gonna have to refloor the whole goddamn living room. This guy was so inconsiderate when he broke into my house to take my shit.

I just like everyone now uses eight sixes or bedside. I think after that, that range day, that became my bedside immediately. Is that, is that a controversial take? Like, I just don't think plea deals should be a thing. Like either you're guilty or you're not prosecute them for what you said or don't fucking. I don't know. I feel like plea deals are only a thing nowadays. Like it is as widespread as they are because we have so many stupid laws on the books. So many, like just,

Absurd. Obscure. Victimless crimes that are being prosecuted that we've overloaded the court system and plea deals just make sense. Well, like to oversimplify it, I'm just thinking about like, even in like the, the arena of like self-defense, like I think it's absurd for a dad to,

that shot somebody breaking into his house to be put in a situation where the prosecutor comes forward and is like, hey, we're trying to put you in jail forever, but if you just admit that you're guilty and do two years, and then you'll get to see your kids go through high school. Or even like, you know what I mean? Because it is like, oh, take the plea deal because we'll let you out, you don't do jail time, but you're admitting to this, and then you have six months probation. And then I get my win as a prosecutor, and then I get to maintain my accurate percentage score

or whatever. Jake, is this sound right or are we just... That's actually what I'm saying. Okay, perfect. That's kind of absurd to me. Yeah, it's f***ing gay, but you don't have to accept a plea deal. It just sucks that you're presented with the option where it's like it becomes gambling at that point where they're like, alright, you have two choices. I know you wanted a cheeseburger, but now you have the option of either getting that cheeseburger, like rolling the dice, getting that cheeseburger, or eating a turd.

Or you can have a cheeseburger that just has like a little piece of turd in it. Well, I would just like the cheeseburger. What's the percentage I'm going to get that cheeseburger? 50-50. Oh, red or black. Based on the opinion of 12 people that are too stupid to get out of jury duty. That's horrifying.

Thank you, Nick. Well, I mean... No, I agree. Trust me, I've been... I know about the criminal justice system. It's fucking gay. You can't find me a jury of my peers. My peers get out of it. Yeah. Constitutionally speaking, this can't happen. Am I wrong? No. I wonder if that's ever gone to court.

These are my peers. You're not winning them over. These dipshits are at jury duty. These aren't peers. They're going to make you guilty now no matter what. I really hope I don't have to go to court for anything. I think Jake will agree with me on this. Jury selection is so lame in the first place. Dude, it is a game.

Because you're looking for the dumbest motherfuckers to sit there. I know, it's like we're going to get a lot of law. Everyone getting heated up. This is a fucking comedy podcast. We've been making jokes the whole fucking time, but I'm pissed off now. I get it out of the last time I had, what, a year ago I had...

Me and Cody were up till 3 in the morning and somewhere between us drinking and him going like, you want to watch Roadhouse? That's what that fucking text was. Okay, Jesus. No, stop. I'm going to stop you right there, Nick. We got another Nick text? A Nick drunk text? I was so confused. I mean, Nick ate cheeseburgers at fucking 2 in the morning. They were sliders, okay? In my defense. Okay.

Did I eat half a loaf of bread? Don't fucking worry about it. Where's your text about Roadhouse? What group was that in? There it is. Deadass, we need to do The Gang Gets Drunk and Watches Roadhouse. That's probably where that came from. Would you guys like to see The Gang Gets Drunk and Watches Roadhouse? Pepper House exclusive. I was like... Could you run that by me again, Jake? Was that Pepper House exclusive? Pepper House exclusive. Alright, guys.

Welcome to Pepper House. Somewhere. That also happened, but then Cody's also like, man, I feel like the Founding Fathers was our friend group. We got fed up with the federal government and started saying no. Yes. More people should do that. What's our tea? What's our tea we're going to throw in?

Well, the Founding Fathers did do that one, but... Yeah, that was to get it started, though. So you're saying we should do Red Face and start damaging property? I like it. Is that where we're going, Brandon? You're a congressman. Well, we know some mountain Jews who apparently did the same thing. Last time I got drunk, I started watching movies. Someone ran for Congress. That's all I'm saying.

I love that I'm going to go down in history as the drunk guy that talks all my friends into running for fucking elected office. Well, because you were talking about running against that senator, right? Yeah, that was shockingly close to happening for a second. Why did you decide not to?

Apparently she started voting correctly. Good. She took a ton of backlash and then I got a ton of motivation or a ton of good PR on Twitter and a bunch of people. I got contacted if I was serious and then she started voting correctly. I was part of that for the record. I talked to a lot of people like, hey.

this guy they're like you really think so i'm like look at what i did they were like heard i'm a little bit more brand safe than you also like i feel like it yeah did you really say that communists aren't people yeah and i stand by it fight me like i don't give a shit like it's the worst thing i've said like you're in the penichet aviation club you want some shirt

That's what you were telling me. 'Cause you were like, "Just run for some office." I'm like, "Yeah, what if they f***ing look at my Twitter?" And you're like, "Just..." Just stand by it. Yeah, just tell 'em, "Yeah, I did kill." If Kash Patel can drop the hard R, f*** it, we can get away with anything.

Yeah, I just like that was really fast in the friends group. No, he didn't. He's right about everything he's saying. And like, I understand the point he's making. The message behind it, he's like, I was called this. The message hits. Did you hear him say it? What did he say? Fuck you, dude. Verbatim. What did he say? Verbatim, Brandon. Kash Patel is like, he's awesome. Like, I believe in everything behind it. But like, if you had...

If you made me bet on who was going to drop a hard R in Senate chambers, I don't think I would have had my money on Kash Patel.

I was surprised, like, seeing that from the group. I was like, oh, okay. Well, they kept pressing him. He was like, oh, you actually want to hear what people are sending me? Okay. And he just went full send. Hard R. I really, at time of recording, he hasn't been confirmed yet. I hope he fucking gets in, man. He is such a good dude. I really want that to happen. I just want the Epstein list out. That's all I want.

That broke my brain since it happened. It's horrible. You remember before the whole Epstein thing when you just had the agency to be like, that's bullshit. That didn't happen. And then the Epstein thing happened and it's like,

Well, maybe. I don't know. You know what I mean? What do you mean? Like, if somebody came to you in 2008 and was like, there's an island where a bunch of a**holes are a**holes on top of a pyramid. To be perfectly honest, I've been on this train for a long time. You know what I mean? You could have been like, that's not true. And then it came out that that was, in fact, true.

dollar bill and the alex jones was right jar right that's the scary part it's like alex jones 2008 you're like fucking crazy dude alex jones now you're like still crazy dude but is he like the fact that he's right about so much really should concern everyone and i he popped up in my feed the other day and just listening to him on a rant i was like

Wow. Okay. He got caught, dude. I don't know if it's the colloidal silver or whatever it is. What's the new fucking...

Talking about Ozempic. Yeah, Ozempic. Ozempic shit. Dude, he got pretty fucking caught. I'm not going to lie, because for a minute there, it was getting a little rough. I loved when he would do his ads showing his before and after when he was on his colloidal silver. Before, after, he's just red. It's the exact same photo. Have you seen those? No. Oh, God, dude. It's pretty fucking funny. Have you seen it?

It was the same day. I'm a little bit more into like jujitsu than you guys, but like, do you guys know who Craig Jones is? I know the name. So Craig Jones is like the number two or number one. Like he's been in the running for the number one best jujitsu guy on the planet for like

Like he's really good. I think he lives out in Austin, but like he's incredible at jujitsu and him and Alex Jones were on a podcast together. You know how, uh, Rogan and Eddie Bravo were on Rogan together. And Alex Jones was like, choke me out, Eddie. And like, yeah, we wouldn't let happen. Rogan wasn't there. And Craig Jones was on a podcast with him and Craig Jones fucking choked him unconscious. I think it was on Alex Jones show. Yeah. On his own podcast, just choked him fucking out cold. Um,

One's just better lighting. 40 days later, 45 days later, and the dude is just the exact same, just red. Send that one to Chase. Chase put this on.

It was wild being at the inauguration just like randomly like I'm hanging out in like different circles and just seeing like GSP and Gordon Ryan. Just everybody like, oh, hey, I've made a lot of money betting on your fights. Good to see you. Dude, there was a lot of fighters out there. It's a lot. Like a surprising amount. I was like, dang. There's nothing. There's nothing. He has no. Conor. Conor was there. McGregor? McGregor?

Do you guys know Colby Covington? Yeah. Have you seen the fucking video where he won a fight a few years back and he's getting interviewed after the fight and the UFC commentator is like, blah, blah, blah, and his phone rings and he looks at it and he goes, oh, hold on. The White House is calling me. And the commentator is like,

Why don't you go ahead and put it on speaker? Colby, obviously not believing him. And he puts it on speakers like, is this Colby Covington? Yes, ma'am. Please hold for the president of the United States. And fucking Trump picks up the phone. Colby, that was a great fight. The commentator is like,

What is happening right now? It's just like when one of our friends jumps into a Discord call and we immediately have to tell him, like, we're streaming, we're streaming. Immediately. Donald, Donald, you're live on TV. All right.

Just in case, not saying you were going to say anything weird, but like, just so you know, I have specific friends when I call. It's like, oh, you're on speaker. Is that why that's the first thing you say? Every time Eli calls me. Do not repeatedly yell the password in all caps. The password. Oh, no. Dude, Don Jr. gave us a white claw. That was kind of cool. That was really cool.

Don Jr. is such a fucking cool guy because you could tell like... Sarah's like, he's down to hang out. Don Jr. and Eric are like the gun guys. So even Kevin Brittingham was telling me at one point, he's like, dude, he's like, Eric Trump like reloads in his garage like 36 different calibers. Like those guys are like legit like hunters, like gun guy, gun guys. It's not just like a facade. Like they live and breathe that shit. Well, he gave me a white claw and like gave you a white claw. And I was...

Like, you know, I never met the man. Like, in passing, I've said hey to him before, but, like, he came up to us, gave us white claws, and I was like, yeah, so Brandon does the gun stuff. I do the cop things on YouTube. He was like, yeah, I know who you guys are. He, like, cuts you off. He's like, no, no, no, I know who you guys are. I was fucking with you guys at lunch with the thing. Oh, Eli doesn't know this.

So do you know the whole, um, it's like a conspiracy theory, but there was like some book written in, written in the 1800s about like the savior of humanity is named Baron. Oh no, I haven't seen that. There was the one with Elon that's traveling to the Mars. The first person, it wasn't like to take over Mars or, uh,

like bring life to Mars was Elon. And it's a book from like a hundred years ago, but I haven't heard the bear. There's like a book from like a hundred years ago, whatever. Baron Trump time traveler. Yeah. So like, there's a book about a dude named Baron that saves the world because he's a time traveler. Everybody like thinks it's Baron Trump or whatever. But I was like, you want to know the crazy part about that?

You know, Nikola Tesla had his laboratory where he supposedly like built an earthquake machine and a death ray and figured out time travel. Right. He had like, I forget the exact amount, but it was like he had 32 bankers boxes full of files of his findings and

and when he died the fbi went out and they only recovered like seven pages yeah like whatever they recovered like a very small amount of what he supposedly had do you know who the fbi agent that was in charge of that was is it trump it was donald trump's uncle dead ass serious that's a real thing donald trump's uncle is the guy that closed out nikola tesla's death and recouped all of his findings just reading stuff he's like hmm

We got some tech here that we need to explore. Also, the genius. I just like the Barron Trump, the tall memes that we're making of him walking. Did you see that? Oh, my. We were talking about him earlier. I think we're like every time we every time Donald Trump takes a W, Barron Trump gets an inch taller.

And so like every time they have a press conference now he's like a fucking 300 foot giant in the background. Dude, where is it? It is terrifying. It's hilarious. Like this. I think it's this one.

Oh, yeah. Is it him walking into the White House? He's eight feet tall. Oh, no, it's not that one. It is the White House one. You've seen the VFX one. There's one where they're on the lawn. Dude, he's like 20 foot tall, like towering over everyone. Well, it's funny because I got in trouble. During my congressional campaign, they tried to get me in trouble because of the Meat Canyon episode we did in Vegas last year where I'm like,

All I said was Barron's tall, which like objectively like I'm 5'10". I feel like I'm okay. But fuck me, I would love to be over six foot. That's dope. That's a good thing, man. How dare you make fun of them? Dude, they tried to fuck you over that one. Yeah, they tried to say like Brandon Herrera made fun of Donald Trump's underage son. It's like, are you fucking kidding me? First of all, he's 17. Second of all, I said he's tall and I'm jealous.

Did you ever see that one? No. That's the one. I love that one. He showed me. He found it.

It's just twice the height. How tall is he? Trump's a tall guy, isn't he? He's like 6'3". He's like above average height, dude. I got a picture. This is like an old school picture. Isn't it like there's only been two presidents ever that were under six foot? Or some crazy stat like that? I can tell you like 70 or 80% were left-handed. I do know that random factor. 90%. That's how tall he is compared to me.

Damn. So he's like, he's pretty, I mean like pretty tall, like six, two, six, three. Yeah. Six, three. Is that 90%?

Is Trump left-handed? A majority have been left-handed. That's what everyone was like, oh, that's... Love how this entire gang episodes for this podcast is literally just the same conversations we'd have if we were sitting at Cody's house on the couch watching Roadhouse. I feel like that's fucking rad, though. You want to know what it's like to hang out with the gang? It's this. We literally do this all day. Hold on, let me Google it. Seven of 45 people have been left-handed. 70? Seven of 45.

why did I just read another one that just said the exact guys Eli makes up a president eight there's eight this is 47 percent at least seven of 45 persons who have held the office of the United States president well the other thing with that is like until very like literally our general Eli's generation was like the first generation where you were allowed to just be left-handed like my father-in-law told me vividly like my father-in-law was like yeah

Whenever the left-handed kids did whatever, they would just fucking tie their right arm to their body and not let them do anything with their left hand. Or tie their left arm to their body and not let them do anything with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, my mom would tell me the same thing, like...

They would slap them with a ruler if they used their f***ing left hand. To this day, I still write retarded. And like, I really wish that like my second grade teacher would have, you know, beat me with a ruler. I hold a pen, f***ing stupid. When you write it, do you write it in all caps or how do you prefer to spell it? I hate that I know your sense of humor. It's okay. It's fine. It's all good.

Mr. Cody, what are you working on right now with your stuff? Shit. I know, you're like living that dream life right now. You're like, nah, just when we got... Wait, did you break down the leg? Oh, God, no. I'm coming up on that one. Accidental discharge. You want to talk about that? Yes. Wait, did we talk about it in the last episode? In Vegas? Yes.

Talk about a little bit. All I did was I read that the officer had, and I quote, multiple fingers inside the trigger well. Yeah. If you guys haven't heard about this one yet, we can just talk about it a little bit. It's a basic traffic stop. They pull a dude out of the car. I mean, it was a basic traffic stop. Yeah. Like, I...

I'll be honest with you. I don't know the fucking... That's where it came from. 507 is the last. I was like, where did I get my number from? I don't know everything that has to do with it right now. But they pulled the dude out of the car. He's super compliant. He's being a really nice guy. The female officer goes to take his gun off of his right hip, which he was legally carrying. And she shoots him in the fucking leg with his own gun.

Yeah. He's going to get paid. Oh, he's going to get fucking money, dude. And I hope he does. Especially like as big as that video got. He's getting.

Yeah. Happened last year. She got fired. Happened last year? Yeah, that was the end of 2024. Oh, well, I mean, like, so a month ago. Yeah. But she did get fired. I do know that. But I don't know if that means she can get another job someplace else, Cody. You know what? She might be able to go to the next county over and get another job being a fat piece of shit female police officer. But, you know, we'll see.

Oh my God. What is your recommendation for that? Like, I mean, do you think it should just be like, like, like kind of like,

Are you talking about being stopped by a female officer? No, no, no. I mean like officers that are fired for doing a bad job of being a dirty cop or whatever. In situations like that, like if you have a sexual assault case, you're like a red dot on this website. Should that just be like – There should be a national blacklist for shitty cops. And they're just done? They're done. Done. I like it. Forever. I remember the one time we got pulled over coming back from brunch.

Do you know this story? No! We got pulled over and I literally had nothing to drink the entire day. We just got pulled over for my registration. But Cody had been drinking that day. Like they just ran it behind you at a stoplight or whatever? Yeah, which I'll be fair. I'm not very good at my registration stuff. No, okay, that bitch waited in the parking lot. No, remember she waited in the fucking parking lot of the gas station because you had to stop by and get gas or do something.

She literally followed me on. Yeah, waited for you to leave. Because I think it was, I don't know what I was doing at the time, but like I was driving. I wasn't like, I was going through like a couple weeks of sobriety or whatever the fuck I was doing. But like no reason to pull me over other than the fact that I was, I had my registration out of date because she was just doing like scanning license plates or whatever. She pulls me over.

Hold on. Let me stop you there real quick. Do you remember the crackhead that came up to us while she was sitting there? The crackhead that came up and tried to fucking ask us for money? Oh, yeah. That was clearly fucking cracked out of his goddamn mind and harassing people. But no. Yeah, but my registration was six months out. Your registration was bad. Okay. No, she's making sure this is a nice neighborhood.

She pulls me over and like, you've been drinking at brunch. I was doing like a fitness thing or whatever the fuck. I hadn't been drinking at all. And so like, I'm just like, all right, get through this, whatever. I'll figure out my registration. And I remember rolling down the window as she's approaching. And the moment you find out she's a female cop, Cody audibly goes, oh God, you're going to die. Yeah.

And I try to almost like roll the window back up, but it's too late. I'm like, no, just gonna fucking let that one sit out there. Fuck. And it was fine. Like me and her having this perfectly normal interaction. I'm like, all right, I'm going to have to pay a ticket. Yes, ma'am. No, ma'am. And she goes back to her car and he's like, you know, I bet I could dart out of this truck, sprint to the wood line, and then put my hands behind my back on the ground next to that tree. And she'd have no idea what to do.

And I just want this all to go away. I'm like, man, I don't want to have a bad day. I'm like, Cody, please don't do that. He's like, you know I could. Like, I am fully aware you could. Have you seen the video where the cop pulls somebody over for something so, like, nothing, something similar, just like a BS traffic stop or whatever, like, totally standard, and they pull over and the passenger gets out and sprints to the wood line, and the deputy is like, why is he running? Yeah.

he's not the one in trouble. And the deputy like just does a normal traffic stop and ends it with like, you can call your friend and tell him like, whatever, I don't give a shit. He gets in his car and leaves. Exactly. That's the cop I was. I'd be like, I'm...

All right, man. Here's your ticket. Officer Garrett's just like, well, that's weird. That's fucking odd right there. All right, buddy. Here's your ticket. But I guarantee you if I would have done that, she would have been freaking her mind. You might have gotten shot. Oh, oh.

She's fucking running at me with a taser. Probably mistake her taser for a gun and kill me. Shoot me. Yeah, it just shoots Brandon. Yeah, it just automatically watches you run out, pulls gun out, shoots Brandon in the head. Alright, while I'm applying pressure, this was a $200 traffic stop that turned into a $20,000 hospital bill. Guys, I have nothing against female police officers whatsoever.

Taser, taser, taser. Clock. I hate that it happened more than once or twice. Glocks that famously feel like tasers. They're even the same bright yellow color. The worst is how you have to draw them compared. So if you're right-handed, your gun is here. And also, if you're right-handed, your taser is here. It's a cross draw. So that's crazy. You train that. People get it confused. Bigot.

Right? Sexist. Sorry I hold everyone to the same standard, no matter their race, religion, sex. That's illegal. Can't do that. I'm just speaking from personal experience. Sorry, I just want, no matter who you are, I just want you to be competent at your job. I want you to be really good at your job. I want you to have your flashlight on night shift when I'm going into a house where someone's getting choked to death.

That's all I'm saying. No personal experience? No personal experience there. I can't even picture that. Did you have to do raids with inadequate people? I'm not going to get into the entire story, but I specifically remember one time where I was the trainee and there was an officer. So you were the trainee? Trainee. Oh, wow. Who happened to have a vagina.

And it's nighttime and there's someone being choked to death and I needed to go into this house and I pulled my gun and my flashlight out. And she said, I left my flashlight at home. It's like, oh, it's a good spot for it. Yeah. Yeah. That's all I'm saying. That's all I'm saying. And that wasn't the first time shit like that. Glad your living room is illuminated. Yeah. Really, really happy that I'm alive today.

that'd be it's like going on a combat mission and like we're like okay everyone ready and look i forgot my nods like huh when where why why what and you can't smoke the shit out of them i'm guessing i'm the trainee buddy what am i gonna do

Should I? Here's the funniest part. I forgot my flashlight at home. Okay, I can hear someone in there screaming. Should I boot the door in? She says, I don't know. Oh, my God. You of all people know the power of a mag light. I want to apply it properly. Holy shit. All right, I'll tell the rest of the story then. Go for it. Go for it, man. Sorry, my mind is blown right now. I'm here for it. All right, so...

Hold on. How old are you and how long have you been doing the cop gig? How big was your mustache? I had a huge mustache. Hell yeah. That's how we measure Cody's age. I'm already on your side in the story. I had been out of the academy for like three weeks. And I was riding with my training officer. So you're like 22 out of the Navy. Yeah. Yeah, I was like 22, 23, something like that. John's like one. Yeah. And so...

I can hear a woman screaming inside and I'm like, do I, do I boot it? Do I, do I do the thing? It's like, I don't know. For fuck's sake. Do you have your flashlight? I left it at home. Me dude. Fucking boot the door in, find the guy. He's strangling his wife. And so like I tuned him up and I turned to her, my training officer. And I'm like, Hey, clear the house. She's like, what do you mean? I'm like, clear the house. What do you mean?

All right, cool. And so like I tuned this dude up. He fell down some stairs. Doesn't matter. Get him in cuffs. He tripped. And then I clear the house. He got the cuffs after he fell down the stairs, right? Yeah, yeah, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just fell down some stairs. It was a single story building. So I clear the fucking house and I come back and this is... One big step. This is...

One small step for shithead. It's a balcony, sir. Anyways, that wasn't the first time I had to do everything myself because I had a backup officer who was a female. Yeah. Some of y'all never had your dad yell at you after he got home from working construction and pouring concrete all day to hold the flashlight at the right spot and it shows. Right.

You wouldn't have left it at home. Point the flashlight over here. I forgot the flashlight, Dad. I'd be pissed. Never in a million years do you ever forget that flashlight. Dad smells like I shouldn't forget the flashlight. I don't know what an alternator is, but at least I have the flashlight. Dad's making up words, but I'm pointing it in its direction. Uh-huh.

That's a fucking terror as a child. That's like a joint memory we all have. The Phillips screwdriver and you're like, fuck. Was that the straight one or the...

I remember my dad's like, that looks like a 5'8". I'm just like, he's a wizard. I don't know what that means. Even that. Fuck y'all, I was the fat kid. I got to be the counterweight on the cherry picker every time he was pulling an engine out.

Come out here! Quit playing Tony Hawk, Crow Skater 2, building your own f***ing skate park. I need you to stand on this cherry picker for three hours. Dude, have you ever actually grown up in the South? If you haven't had your dad do sketchy shit with a cherry picker, the cherry picker I feel like is like the most abused tool. Dad, this is the same thing we pulled shrubs out of the front yard with last week? Yeah, shut up. Just kick it. No, kick it harder.

God, it's right there. Oh, our childhoods are way too similar. Bro, my dad... So, like, when I was growing up, my dad...

He raced figure eight track. Like you guys don't figure eight is it's racing with a fucking intersection. It's the most, this is imagine where you're like, you know, actual, actual race cars. Yes. So, you know, RC tracks where there's like a bridge and you go, they're like, the bridge is too much. Let's just where they have to watch each other.

let's just have an intersection my dad did that the whole time i grew up and it would be like my dad and his two buddies every day after work monday through friday racing is on saturday my dad's buddy's a welder fucking pull every every time matt comes out from underneath the car pulls his welding hood up he's smoking underneath his welding hood while he's

Fixing my dad's race car. Famously non-flammable material called acetylene. It was a good time. It was a great childhood. Jesus Christ. We're gonna use the piss tube. I was thinking the same thing. The piss tube. The piss tube in the garage. I know. You guys laugh. I have a video of the piss funnel. My dad sent it to me after that last episode. I know. You sent it to the chat, dude.

That pest funnel's been there for like 14 years. If you've never fucking pressed a rivet, if you've never used a drill press or a mill or a welding machine, you shouldn't be able to tell the average American what the fuck to do with any part of their life. Fuck you. That blue collar life. Is that the only one that had to go in the basement and then set up like a...

What is it to shoot water out because your basement floods? A sump pump? Yeah. We didn't have basements where I was from. Our basement is a very loose... Like a crawl space? No, it was a basement. It was just mud. There was no concrete. It was just dirt walls. Mud people. Yeah. Mud people. Mexicans. Yeah.

But it was like a sump pump. We'd just have to go there once a week or if it rained. Once a week is wild. Oh, yeah. Dude, my childhood was dope. Lots of manual labor. But you just get in the mud and it's like up to here. And now I look back and my dad had like wader boots. But I would have to walk in with just no shoes on. So he was like, go, put it in the hole. So I'd walk it, drop it in there, run the hose to him. I'm like...

my childhood. I remember like doing the, doing the crawl space shit with my dad or like we're having to do something under the house and like, dad, there's, there's a spider down here and he asks me to describe it to see if it's a problem. That's real America, dude.

My dad, when I was playing in the garage with his shit that he didn't want, he taught me a good lesson because I never touched his shit again. I was fifth grade and I was playing with like stuff that was on the thing. I was like, oh, and I was playing with it. He got me. He's like, what are you doing? I was like, oh, nothing.

So I go take a nap and then he just puts like paint on me, like green paint where it dropped and it spread. He made it look like it spread when I was sleeping. So I wake up and I have like this green weird stuff on my arm. I'm like, Oh, and I go down. I'm like, dad, what happened? He's like, told you not to play with my shit. Like that.

We'll see what we can do. Never touch for like the next three years. I'm not touching him. I'm picturing your dad as I know him. I'm picturing your dad as I know him now. And that is the funniest shit in the world. Doing this to a grown 40-year-old Eli. Hey, pops. It's like, fuck. After meeting your dad, I can see that. And it's hilarious, dude. After meeting him at the Dallas show.

Long John's himself. Papa Cuevas. Papa Cuevas. He's the best. I miss him. There's blood on my carpet. There's blood on my carpet. Don't get blood on my carpet. He looks like the Mexican member of ZZ Top.

He's a good dad to have. Walk downstairs. I think Luke and him told you. Like, dad, walk downstairs. L-sharp dressed man. Me and my friends are beating the shit out of each other in the living room because we just do MMA from like 7th grade till 12th grade. We beat the...

I know I've sparred with you at shows. We fought. So it was like midnight. My dad walks there and we are beating the fuck out of each other. He's like, hey, like opens the door. He's in his long john underwear. He's like, don't get blood on my carpet. And then he walks upstairs. That was it. I was like, huh? My friend's like, man, your dad's really cool. I'm like, ah,

He's not very present, I don't think. He works a lot. I don't think we should be allowed to do this at this age. Now that I reflect, that'd be like my kid. I was just beating the fuck out of each other at 14. The typical Mexican father, like, well, they're around. Kind of. He's upstairs. Yeah. There's that. And then there's like, so like my dad did construction, yours did whatever. But like,

Did your father do construction? Yeah. Okay, so we're all constructionists. My wife, I literally married the farmer's daughter and farming is a little bit different because like, I don't know, I see a 2,000 pound animal and I'm like, or a herd of 2,000 pound animals that my father-in-law's raising and I'm like,

Probably not going to fuck with them, you know? Reasonable. My wife, who's this tall, is like, why are you so worried about them? And then just starts chasing an entire herd of cows going, ooga booga booga booga booga. Fuck you. I don't think you're allowed to say that. It's causing a stampede. Like, what the fuck is going on? Giant animals are terrified. I agree. My wife does. Even cows, I'm like, nah, that could kill me. My wife, horrified of a spider, says,

2,000 pound animal, 200, 2,000 pound animals that could trample her. Not phased at all. Doesn't give a shit. But watch out for that fucking spider, buddy. Like daddy long leg. Fuck it. We're calling me a bunch of cows. Not an issue. Speaking of like that, that fear of spiders. I didn't know, know it until I watched that Wendigoon video about lethal company. Did you see that? You did like a full like.

about Lethal Company, but he did one where they apparently have arachnid mode. Explain Lethal Company. Oh, the game. Lethal Company, the game. Oh, okay, okay, okay. They have, like, one of the enemies in the game is a giant fucking spider, like, eight-foot fucking big-ass spider. Explain Lethal Company again. Maybe I'm not thinking the right game. It's just, like, I guess there's a VR mode or whatever, but, like, it's a game where you go and collect resources and whatnot. Like, you've seen a bunch. Like, it's, like, a four-player game.

Oh, okay. I was thinking a World War II game. I don't know why. No, no, no. Bad Company. Yeah, you're thinking Bad Company. It's kind of like Helldivers-ish, where it's like four guys go out, get resources, that sort of thing. But it's more like horror slash whatever. They wear the suits? Yeah, yeah. And the monsters. Okay, okay, okay. Now I'm checking. One of the enemies is a spider, like a giant eight-foot spider or whatever. I didn't know that you can actually set it to arachnophobia mode.

Where you can just click a button and instead of a spider enemy like they have, like a full resolution spider, it changes into the word spider. And so you're being chased by the word spider. Which is like really kind of fucking funny. I just like there was like in a horror game like, oh, you're afraid of that. We got you. Spider, spider, spider. It's such a good bit. I'm like, I'm not even mad at it, man.

What games have you been playing? You beat Red Dead. You beat Cyberpunk like a billion times. I got back into Cyberpunk and I'm like, I'm having a hard time playing it. I mean, Helldivers is always fun. Like just to jump on with the boys. Hell let loose. Ready or not. I've actually, I enjoyed the shit out of that for a while. Oh yeah. The SWAT game. Yeah. We still need to play that at some point. We do. I've been playing it with John. I know. I played it with John a couple of times.

It's fun as f***. To me, I S-tiered all the shit and then I got bored. We went into that one map and I was like, no, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill. We do that as a palate cleanser. We go in, like you're supposed to save the civilians, but it's like, if you're a civilian on Epstein Island, are you?

Fucking are you? I'm supposed to apprehend you, but... I don't know. There's a... There's a couple maps. Basically, you're a SWAT team. Yeah, that I know. And you get your realistic environment...

Your kit's badass. You can choose whatever you want. I run around with an MP7, but there's every gun imaginable in there. It's cool because you can customize them and stuff. You can choose to do non-lethal. Yeah, you can do non-lethal. You can tase people, pepper ball them, stuff like that. Flashbangs, beanbag rounds, everything. Or you could just go into an MP7 and just kill them. Yeah, well, it's kind of fun going in the...

F***ing ass with an MP7. Just being like, nope, you don't belong here. Just killing everyone. It's like eight rooms out of the house are like dedicated to making, you know, CP. No shit. So it's like, ah, like every civilian is like, come on. Yeah, there's like cameras with like cribs beside them. Like it's nasty. In the basement, there's like 55 gallon drums, like acid and shit with like kids clothes in it and shit like that. And you're like,

No, there's no civilians on this map. That's what you like. You clear up top, you arrest people, go downstairs, see the vats. You're like, huh? Huh? Walk back upstairs. Stop. No longer arrest. Jake, I believe I'm going to have to make a plea deal. You're going to undo those handcuffs real quick. Here you go. Here's a gun. What's that for? Okay, next one. I just need you to hold this.

I didn't know about that. What the fuck? It gets pretty dark. What games have you been? Are you just leagues? League and mobile risk. That's about it. Mobile risk? That is the most Nick thing I've ever heard. What? You're playing mobile risk? You guys know my league handle, right?

Is it mobile risk? No. On League. On League. So I've been playing since like high school and my name for like 10 years was Filthy Communist. And I finally got reported and had to change my name. I don't know why. After a decade? After 10 years, I finally got reported like, you have to change your name. And I'm like, all right, f*** it. So I just like...

Shoot for the stars, you know, spend 30 minutes like typing in shit only to find out, oh, that name's taken. That name's against the rules, whatever. First name I tried after being filthy communist for 10 years was Karl Marx. Just Karl space Marx, period. That name's available. I am Karl Marx on League of Legends.

How many friend requests have you gotten? Every time I get in game, I'll chat, who's read my book? I'm retarded.

Running around stealing kills. What the fuck? That was a KS hour kill. Stealing farm? I don't give a fuck. I love it. Where are my homie angles at? I hate you so much as a dude. I'm like, oh, so good though. He's stacking bodies. He's stacking bodies better than anyone. Karl Marx is on a killing spree. That's accurate. I will never get in the league like period after...

Cody, did you ever play League much? Dude, I tried to get into League. I couldn't get into it. It is a learning curve that is. Yeah, because Hunter is big in the League too. Huge. Yeah. Dude, I just couldn't get into it, man. Yeah. I'm not good. I just piss people off. I love it.

i hear it's sweaty as oh yeah it's the most toxic player basically will ever be and that is how i want i want to get involved dude you cannot i again you can stress it's like it's a toxic it was like oh i've i've done call of duty you're like oh that does not amount to no compared to ranked league matches you make one mistake and you're just the biggest man

bag in the world oh i don't miss that game how do you play that still that's all i play are you playing with me papa meat uh-uh i haven't i probably should papa meets a top i started playing a bunch of cod when i was uh when i was in the sling because i couldn't i couldn't do this so i literally couldn't play computer games so i could only play xbox right here so i was playing a bunch of cod but that was about it you know who's ungodly

good at cod who like alarmingly good at cod nick pewview weird bro i played i played with him one game he was like 39 and three in every game you just fucking slaying everyone it's like as good as he's shooting in real life he's better in cod it makes sense who's

Eli, who's your friend that played with a trackball? I had two friends that played with trackbox. Chris was one of them. It was the most disgusting thing watching this dude play with a trackball because you look at it and you're fucking retarded to play like this. Do you know trackball? Yeah. With your thumb. And then you play him and he is just melting souls with headshots. Just bored. Just bored.

stacking bodies, and that was going from Counter-Strike into Call of Duty. Like, Counter-Strike, just diamond rank, slaying, going into Call of Duty, slaying. I was like, okay, well, fuck me. I'll just get used to the normal mouse. For those of you that don't know, a trackball... So think of a mouse. You got the ball on the bottom of it, right? A trackball is just a ball on top of the mouse, and you move it with your thumb...

And Eli, I think I played with you guys like one time, two times, maybe. Brandon did the best. And this dude, this dude with the trackball. This is way too sweaty for me, dude. He was just fucking everyone up, just moving this little trackball around. Ridiculous. I mean, if you grew up with that, I guess you got the muscle memory for it. I think we look at that like old people look at us playing computer games. Yeah, that's true.

I think you probably get used to it. It's like Brandon when you... Literally the first time you're playing first person on a keyboard and mouse, you're like, how do I jump? I was about to say this unironically, but it hurt my soul before it came out of my mouth. Half a decade ago,

Yeah. At your birthday party. Oh, yeah. That was half a decade ago. Oh, what are you talking about? Best? No, that was him playing. Yeah. Well, my first time playing PC games because I didn't even own a fucking gaming PC at that point. So you're like, oh, let's play the new Call of Duty Modern Warfare. I'm like, oh, cool. I'm like looking for space bar. I'm like,

it was looked out for a space bar bro i had not played pc i don't i was a console gamer i was lame i hadn't played console in like 10 years until i tore my peck to play god like i got a ps3 just to have something to fucking do and ps3 sucks or ps4 whatever the fuck it is now it's five i think now whatever like the entire notion of like

Oh, you want to play that new game you just bought on a disc? Cool. You need to download it for seven hours before you can play the game. I was like, what the f*** happened?

Oh, yeah. Now, that is... You probably experienced that. Well, your kiddos don't play video... No tablets and shit. Game Boy Color. With John, when you were giving him new games, you have to, like, set up the system, install everything. It is, like, a day procedure to give them a Christmas present. Yeah, Christmas Day. Like, okay, I think we all remember, like, Christmas Day, getting a video game where you're just like, oh, this is so cool, and you pop it in, and you play it for the first time. Bam!

You get the PlayStation 2, whatever. That's fucking cool. Kids don't have that now where it's like, okay, cool. It'll be downloading for the next 17 hours. And then you've got to go to, depending on what game you're doing, you've got to go to the PlayStation Network and set up an account. And then you've got to do this and this and this. Then wait fucking eight hours for the game to download. Remember when Helldivers required...

A year into the game or whatever, they required you to get a Sony account and sign up for the PlayStation Network or whatever. And then they basically all, the entire player network became eco-terrorists overnight. Did you watch that? No. Oh. It was a meltdown. You went from like the top rated game on Steam to PlayStation, Sony, they're...

I bleeped that word. They said, hey, in order to be on this, in order for you to have this game where cross... Bleep what word? What's that cross... Cross platform. Cross platform. If you want to be on cross platform, you have to make a Sony account. So everyone has to make a Sony account. Like if you want to be on this and immediately... Now it's like enter your email, do all this shit. The player base. They revolted. Like the review...

It went down to like 2.1. It was a review bomb. Console gaming is like, it's got to be close to dead. No, it's bigger than ever. I don't understand because it's like you can... Consoles are to the point now where the new PlayStation is basically a fucking decent gaming computer. So it's like what's the point of a console anymore when you can just play with an Xbox or a PlayStation controller on your PC? It's like

I don't understand why you would get a console over a PC. The real question is... It's easy. Yeah. It's easy to go to the, you know, go to fucking Target and buy a fucking PlayStation 5 over building a gaming PC. Especially, like, parents. They're just like, oh, yeah, that's the fucking game machine. Yeah, exactly. Game machine. Did John, just real quick on the thing, did John make you ever install mods or anything on games before? I mean, yeah, in the past. Not recently. Okay.

That rhymes. I need the no break mod on Grand Theft Auto, daddy. That is my Christmas present. I'm like, fuck. Bigger titty mod on Fallout. On Pac-Man? How? Daddy. Eli, you just... You just...

Hope you don't break the entire game installing one mod. Mm-hmm. Okay, buddy. I got this for you. Fallout mods were the best. It's like, what if I made my minigun shoot pool balls? The AK-50 is available on a Fallout New Vegas mod, whatever. I've never been able to play with it. Because every time I've tried to do mods on New Vegas, it's broken my game. One time I got fucking... Most recently, the most recent time I tried to play New Vegas was a year ago.

I tried to do a playthrough, installed some mods, like the better graphics mods. And then like I tried AK 50 and everything. It started lagging. And then like an hour, hour, two hours, three hours into it, it just killed it.

And I tried to delete the mods and it was like, oh, you cannot because you did so much of your playthrough with the mods. You can't restart this save without mods. Like, all right, fuck it. I just threw up my hands. Brandon can't even play the gun he's developed for the past decade. I can literally drive fucking 10 minutes down the road and go shoot the gun, but I can't do it on the fucking computer.

make it make sense liberal have you seen god there's like there's one podcast where the guy's like when the new grand theft auto comes out it would be a legitimately good investment of your time to just get really good at the new grand theft auto because like i mean the current grand theft auto has been out for like 10 years and there's people literally making a living like just selling shit like not a living they are

It's like Counter-Strike skins. Really? Dude, Counter-Strike skins? Underage gambling? The people that make the skins. They're saying the new Grand Theft Auto, if it ever comes out, is going to actually have a real crypto coin attached. And that crypto coin that's only good in the game is actually going to be worth a fuck ton of real money in real life. What's crazy is that actually makes sense. Yeah. It makes more sense than half a crypto, frankly.

It's at least functional outside of just like perceived value. Artists that goes on to state, depending on the popularity of the case for making a Counter-Strike skin, if you have a popular one, on average, you'll earn $420,000 per year per skin. What the f***? I can't wait to see like FEC versus Rockstar Games. Why are we not making unsub skins? Dude. $400,000 per skin. I'm still a little hurt personally. SEC. SEC.

The dude blocked us. The fucking AM180 guy? Yeah. What? The developer, or one of the game developers that was responsible for bringing the AM180, the American 180, into Fallout New Vegas is on Twitter pretty active and blocked you. Yeah. Never talked to the guy in my life. It's like we wanted to invite him to Range Day, and he looked, and it's like, has Donut Operator blocked you?

It's like, God damn, dude. I just want to invite you to range day. I really, it was probably a saving grace. It's like, damn. Oh, Nick, how goes your, by the way, we found this out also. What's the difference between nuclear bomb and atomic bomb? Nuclear? George Bush? Yeah.

riveting man it's no it was literally because we're all that's above my pay grade i don't know because i know there's there's like the the original atom bomb and then there's the hydrogen bomb and i did that vt fuse video and there's been like a bunch of comments actually the atomic bomb isn't a nuke and it's like yes the

It is according like it's it's been the meme since memes have been a thing. We nuked Japan. Like I said, the biggest weapon of World War Two wasn't us. It wasn't the nuke. And people are like, actually, the atomic bomb is in the nuke. And it's like, I fucking hate you guys. Even if you're right, I'm still right. Right. Like everyone knew what I was talking about. You're just being that guy.

I mean, to be fair, you have cultivated an audience of actualies. I get it. I get it. But... Still... Still correct. You made that audience. You built it brick by brick. Actually by... And now you're caught off guard. Yeah.

I was like, oh, that sucks. It's okay. I'll hit him with the keyboard warrior next time. It's going to work out. What's your next video you're working on? I haven't decided yet. It's either going to be Billy Wah or the Sergeant York video.

Sergeant York is fucking rad. So Billy Wah. I do not know either of those. I don't know Billy Wah. Billy Wah is OG Delta. Like the foundations of Delta. So homeboy...

joined the military as soon as he could. He tried to enlist at 15 for World War II, wanted to be a paratrooper more than anything, and then ended up joining, goes to the Korean War, ends up... He imported his fucking car that he bought right before he shipped off to Korea. He had it shipped over to Korea, and he went to this port and picked it up, and there were these guys with these weird patches, and he's like, what do you guys do? And they're like...

It's a f***ing secret. You want to apply? And he's like, yeah. So he applied, just becomes one of the OG Delta guys. Wait, so he just ran into people with no tapes and was like, what is this? No, they had a unit patch that he'd never seen before. What year was this? This was the Korean War. Oh, like 55-ish? Yeah. This was like the origins of like...

the U S government was like, Oh, the, the British had the ministry of ungentlemanly warfare. We should probably copy that. And they,

working with the OSS and shit, the predecessor to the CIA. And he ends up becoming one of the OG Delta guys. He is one of the guys that pioneered Halo jumps. He's like all the shit that spec ops now, this dude was a pioneer of through Korea, Vietnam. The dude was operational into his 70s. I didn't realize you could Halo jump out of a helicopter until like a couple days ago.

That sounds scary as shit. His final mission that he went on in his 70s, he was in Afghanistan tracking down Osama bin Laden. The fuck? In his 70s and tracked him down like three times. So like. Well, yeah, all they had to do was ask the CIA to call a meeting with Tim Osman. So I'm doing a video on him. Crazy. Now we know where he is. And then the Sergeant York, which is just.

a hilarious story of just government corruption. Alvin York, right? No, this, yeah, it was named after Alvin York. So the Sergeant York was, was a tank. It was an anti-aircraft tank that,

I'm learning. It was specifically designed to go hand in hand with the Abrams into the theater. And it was supposed to keep up with the Abrams and be able to just shoot down any air support that comes for the normal Abrams. And it was able to shoot them down. I don't know this story either. It has two 40 millimeter Bofors on it.

on a tank and it was, Congress was like, we're trying to save money, put it on a patent chassis, which is a world war two tank. So they're like, okay, I guess whatever. So they did it and they come use those a bunch of like Vietnam era. Yeah. Yeah. So they were trying to, they came up with the system and it was supposed to be the shit and they had a, the system was, it had two, two ways of tracking. It could track motion and it could track heat.

So the primary one was motion. So it would, you know, it would see the helicopter rotors or whatever from, you know, a mig or whatever the attack helicopter was coming for him. And it would be able to, it would literally be able to just track it. And all the gunner had to do was hit fire. Like there was no math, no calculations. All the gunner had to do is pull the trigger.

And then it back up. It had thermals. So they bring out Congress on like these aluminum bleachers. And then they have Sergeant York's widow in the bleachers with the congressional guys to show off the tank that we named after your deceased husband. I remember this story actually. Now that you say that. So they're doing this show off thing and like they've already rigged it out of the gate because it's such a.

piece of shit they put they have like a black hawker and apache fly out and they have they put radar deflectors on it the ncoic in charge of the range is like putting radar deflectors on top of this plane is the equivalent to covering a dude in steak and having him stand in a walmart parking lot and seeing if a bloodhound can find him like it's completely unrealistic that was a real quote i found like researching for the video

So this helicopter has radar deflectors on it and it flies out. They turn on the system that's supposed to track motion from the helicopter, but the system automatically locks onto the closest thing. So the system is like, and instead of aiming at the helicopter, it aims on the exhaust fan on the shit house for the range aims at the latrine. And they're like,

So they're like, okay, it's fine. It's no big deal. Switch over to thermals. Alvin York's widow's taking a shit. Alvin York's widow's sitting with Congress, like botched one. They're like, it's okay. We're fine. We're going to switch over to thermals. It'll pick up the helicopter because the engine's hot. They switch over to thermals. The closest thing is all the congressional members and Alvin York's widow's sitting on an aluminum bleacher. So then the guns and aims right at him. And yeah, it killed the whole fucking project.

Okay, the project. And that's how she died. It was just like the R2-D2 unit on the Navy ships where it's just like, like keeps locking onto the fucking... Locking onto the commercial airlines? Exactly. It's like, no. No. Like, you sure, Dad?

I want to eat the fucking sea wizards. The sea wizards. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there was all kinds of like, I'll get into it in the video, but there was like, there was so much political corruption involved because like three different companies submitted their product. Cause you know, like the government is like, here's $50 million develop a prototype to these specs and they give it to like X amount of companies. They gave it to three companies. They gave it to general dynamics, Ford and somebody else.

And the general dynamics prototype shot down like 19 of 23 drones or whatever that it was testing. The Ford version shot down like four.

And they're like, we're going to give it to Ford. Just complete political corruption. I fucking dare you to find one scenario of weapons acquisition for the government that isn't riddled with political corruption. Since fucking World War I. Obviously, the current military is sidearm.

It's really good at shooting people. It's really good at shooting. By itself. No fingers in the trigger well. People are harmed. I mean, if that's your goal, it succeeds. What are we going to do in D.C. when we go out to D.C.?

Why are we going to D.C., Eli? February. I was actually going to ask you, do you think there's any chance that when we film... Can we say what we're... I don't know. I don't know what we're allowed to say. I don't know either. We get a tour of some great stuff. We get some fucking interesting shaped buildings. When we film Unsub Drunk from the Pentagon...

Do you think there's any chance that they'd let us film in the room where they keep all the filing cabinets? I hear there's a blank spot right around 2001 where we could probably set up the table. We can ask. It's a nice big opener. I just want to do that early 2000s movie punch cut where it goes black and white. It's like, Nick was killed in a vehicular explosion in February 2025.

We do get a... I think we get... Cody opened an institute to train female police officers. We might have to cut this part. It closed out. I think we should be able to say where... We get a... If we're filming at the Pentagon, we get to say we're at the Pentagon, right? Oh, yeah. The title's going to be Unsub Drunk from the Pentagon. Yeah. Obviously. Okay, good. And then we do have some cool people coming on because...

bleep the name just for now wants to be on it hell yeah bleep all that yeah yeah sleep all that they're all like super excited while we're bleeping shit did you guys hear the the leaked audio where the pilots forgot they left the intercom on on the plane which one the the one where one pilot's like man i'm kind of hung over and he and he's like quick question

Who would you trust more to pilot this plane? Me after five cocktails or a female pilot? And the other pilot goes, I would trust you on a heavy dose of fentanyl over a female pilot. You got John laughing at me. You had John doing his...

John's doing his chicken lap. He got some nuggies in his mouth. I'm dying right now. Do we have to bleep that? That's a great bleep. The leaked audio. You didn't say that. That was the leaked audio. What are we going to do? Who do you want to interview for the CPAC thingy when we're on the floor for that thing? We get to do a gang episode there, which is what the goal was. Just a gang with chaos all around us.

I would love to get people like Tucker on. I feel like that would be a lot of fun. Oh, me too. I know you would. Me fucking too. You guys have some World War II opinions that I'd like to see flushed out. We're going to argue about World War II. I would love to get... Like, J.D. Vance is my new... Him and Elon Musk are my dream podcast guests, though. Because J.D. Vance is just such a normal fucking guy.

I just, I would love to have him on Unsub. I wonder, that's the one I wonder how is ran because it is, do we just get to grab people as they walk by? Do we have to schedule out who's coming on for certain times? I didn't, I thought it was in like a room and then they showed us the photos. I was like, oh, we're on like the floor. Like the show floor. Like those little podcast studios or whatever at SHOT Show. Like that little alley. Yeah, but we get a big one. Do you see, like the space is actually like,

Did you see it? That's this month? Have you seen it? This February. No, I haven't seen it. Dude, show... Good. We got a big space. A very big space. But, like, it's literally, like, that's where people do new stuff. So, did you show Nick? That shit's fucking... He hasn't seen it. Have you seen it, Nick? No. It's, like, there, like, on the floor. Good.

Good. Good. Audio's gonna be f***ing interesting, but yeah, it's gonna be lovely. Well, we'll probably laugh and do this. Yeah. Actually, I think we're pretty good. We can f***ing close this bitch out. Cody, if you want to close it out. Do the thing? Do the thing?!

Bye, everyone. Thank you for coming to the unsubscribed podcast. I was joined today by Eli DoubleTap, Nick Fat Electrician, Brandon Herrera, and myself, Donut Operator. We love you. I gotta pee. Yeah. You can join us on Patreon to see the after show. We'll see you next time.

You won't know.