174 - The War On Disinformation ft. Habitual Linecrosser & Ryan McBeth | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 174
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Always when I sit next to you, Nick, it's a sweater. I just have hairy man just filling your hair twist into mine. It's an exothermic human. I'm always willing to sit next to him just so you know. What do you want from me? Nothing. Shave this arm. No. No. Just one arm. No. Your tattoos will look so good. No. They'll be covered in ingrown hairs. But...

This is going to be a team by man's games. Start it off, Mr. Brand. Oh, wait. No, we're going to do it right first. We're going to do it right. Actually, do we want to real quick? Cody, come. Yeah, do the high everyone. Three, two, one. All right.

Right up here, big boy. He's mad about it. He's mad about it. Do you guys drink when you're on your periods? Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Doubletap, Nick, Fat Electrician, Ryan, Habitual Line Crosser, Brandon Herrera, and myself, who's leaving now. I'll miss you forever. He shits himself. Like, whoa, that started really hard. We just push his body out the way.

Got two more hours with it. Hey, everyone. Whoa, hi. New to the podcast, Mr. Ryan. We have different takes. I can't wait for this episode because it was already hostile in there. Oh, yeah. It's going to be very hostile. Mitch has been fighting with the guests lately. That's true. Yeah.

Me and Steven almost got in a fight over how much power Hirohito had during World War II yesterday. That was interesting. It worked out, though. Yeah, you guys missed it. You won? Is that where you... I don't know. We can let the audience decide. I feel like I won. So today we're just going to decide whether or not your mother or your mother loves Shakespeare more.

It is spelled a little bit differently. All right, I'm actually going to take the plunge here. It's good. It is surprisingly good. Get this man a push light.

You want a bush light? Oh my god. Alright. This would taste great if you dumped it out and filled it up with rye whiskey. Alright, to be fair to you, tangerine is one of my least favorite flavors. You actually- And it's warm. You genuinely drink this stuff? You put this in your body! So homophobic about White Claw, we gotta have this. I could do that. Thank you. Cheers. Cheers.

They make out. This is a star-studded episode. Is it better? You know, I've been in a room with six guys and a couple of cameras before, and it's gone a different way. Well, you know, we all pay for college different ways. You know, when you're at 11... It was a field of inventory. When you're at 11, bravo, and you're out for a 21-day field problem...

You know, what- what happened? What just happened? You just cut off

Never mind. What? No, go for it. The way he cut it off earlier, I thought you made a pretty edgy joke right out of the gate. Really? Well, you were talking about things going a different way when you were surrounded by men and drinking, and you said, you know, when I was 11, and then you paused. I thought you made a really aggressive joke, and then you're like, I was an 11 brother. So how was karate? Oh, shit.

I read a little bit too far into that one. We don't go to camp anymore. I'm going to fucking kill him over here. Jesus Christ. Get my notes out. There we go. The infantry is probably one of the most homoerotic organizations a man can be in. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. The way I scale it is infantry, army. Hold on. Stay with me. Marine Corps in general.

Marine Corps infantry. Oh. Yeah, I go Marine Corps. Like, this is the thing. The Marine Corps infantry is the gayest straight organization that exists in this world. They'll be like, f***ing each other and just be like, yeah, yeah, you like that, Pogue? It's the weirdest thing, man. You're gay for looking. It's fucking weird, man. Yes.

I knew a guy who made a FIFI. Are you familiar with what a FIFI is? Yeah, we've all deployed. A FIFI is a device. I don't even know what a FIFI is. So a FIFI is an acronym, and it is a device that simulates the gentle touch of a woman. You would typically take a medic's glove and roll it up in a towel.

And you would take some KY jelly that the medics have, and you would use that to ingratiate yourself. I just picture so many notes being taken from the medics. It's like the Swiss Family Robinson fleshlight. I want to see the guy. For 10 seconds, it's good to go. Jesus. This guy, he took it, and he went out to the wood line, and he put it in the crack of a tree and grabbed the two branches of this tree, and the whole wood line's moving.

You were in the infantry. Dude's straight out there jumbled. Like, my brain just, like, he's making ape noises. Like, my brain just took that way further than it did. I'm sorry. He was very rough with that tree. What was his nickname after that? Groot? Groot.

George of the Jungle. What year did you get out of the Army? God, 2014. So you joined in 1994? I'm almost 50. You've got to watch peacetime Army 2, actual wartime Army 2. Yeah, and you know what's crazy is that you have...

In the 90s, it was all like, who are we supposed to fight? I don't know. We're going to make up enemies, right? The Krasnovians, right? And occasionally you'd pretend to be Serbians. 1-4 is like the best unit of the Russian army. Well, some guys, 3rd ACR would say differently. But 1-4, best unit of the Russian army, the Krasnovian army, right? 75th Motor Rifle Regiment.

And we're bad guys. Never heard of these people. One for it. They are the bad guys that NATO can practice.

against the bad guys. We would wear different uniforms, drive M113s that are Vismodded to look like BMPs and so on. And yeah, we would fight against the good guys, which would be... What was the laser gear? Miles gear? Yeah, Miles gear. And you know, honestly, it's fun for a couple of days when you're in Germany and it's like 50 degrees and you've been outside for like...

you know, four days at a time, you're like, all right, let's light a fire. Maybe NATO will call an artillery on us. That way we can go back to the warming timing tents. You are infantry. That's like a strictly military thing. You know what sounds better than this? Fucking dying. Strictly a military mentality. This was back in the day. Literally, I've said it before, walking around the middle of the night and patrolling, everyone's just like...

What about the cherries? Well, I won't feel it. Funny story about that. I was a cigarette smoker for years before I switched to cigars. I love cigars.

But cigarettes have their own magic, right? And I know once I was on a hilltop. I was on a hilltop in Germany, right? And it was my turn for watch and I lit up a cigarette and I was smoking a cigarette. Now,

There was this one guy. His name was Smitty. And this guy, he used to carry the M60 machine gun.

Very heavy machine gun. That was before my time. Big fucking guy. Well, sometimes they give it to the small guy. Your machine gunner's name was Schmitty. Schmitty. Everybody's machine gunner. Pause real quick. Hold on. We just missed something. Eli goes, sometimes they give it to the small guy. Were you on gun team? No, I was the SDM, so I didn't have to worry about that. I could shoot, thank God. Well, it's like Don Graves talking about how his fucking higher-ups hated him, so they gave him the flamethrower as the shortest guy. Jesus Christ.

I'm sorry. Just continue. So I'm up on this hilltop, and I was smoking a cigarette, figuring, no one's around. NATO isn't around, right? I'm smoking a cigarette, and I'm ashing. And this guy, Smitty, he loved carrying, or he loved shooting the 60, hated actually carrying it, right? Hated it. And so we ended up, I was a dragon gunner at the time, which is an anti-tank missile, so I was having to carry some of his ammunition because he couldn't hump it.

This is so different than... I don't even know what a Dragon is. A Dragon, it's an anti-tank missile. It's wire-guided. It's similar to the Javelin, but before the Javelin. Wire-guided, that's tow. Well, the Javelin was wire-guided, too. It was created in the 70s. It was a small wire-guided missile. It reached out to about 1,400 meters. Now I learned something. Hey, here we go. I used to carry this damn thing. Usually Nick teaches. I carried this damn thing up and down freaking hills in Germany.

And technically it was a Sager, which is a Russian missile, not a Dragon, because we're the bag. I actually have a Sager missile in the shop. I thought you were about to make a racist joke. I'm sorry. It does sound offensive. Someone called me that, like, whoa. You dirty fucking Sager. Nobody liked this guy. Nobody likes Smitty, right? Apparently not. They made up a slur.

For him. Give him a 60 to the second. I'm sorry. Had a couple of cigarettes and then I swapped out for the next guy to go on watch, go to bed.

And stand-to in the morning. Stand-to is the time when everybody has to be up. I think it's half hour before daylight and then half hour before sunset, right? Because that's when the French and Indians attack. I've never had stand-to. Hold on. There's some actual... So it is...

it originated when the French and Indians would attack because they would use the sun at their back to like kind of attack. Yeah. It's a natural. It's the Taliban. I'm surprised you didn't know about this. The Taliban would often do that sunup and sundown. They would attack during those times. Cause like our NVGs, like we own the.

night like i got very comfortable in the night in afghanistan during the daytime we can see as far as they can we have better optics we're better shots we don't fucking spray and run in sandals and uh so they would attack when the sun was going down or coming yeah i'm surprised you didn't know oh shit they're here you never did stand to like every morning before they come over the hill you're here

I'm sorry. No, we didn't because even at Fort Lewis show bombs on position. Oh,

- Oh my God. - Show both of them. - You didn't even stand to. - No, how the fuck have I missed this? - I'm surprised. - Yeah, before, a half hour before, maybe it was a 90s thing, I don't know, but. - He didn't, well he knew he did it, I didn't, I don't fucking know. - Hold on, did you ever do Afghanistan? - No. - Did you ever do Afghanistan? That might be it. Afghanistan was pretty well known.

Like, that was a pretty common thing. The Taliban were smart. Like, we killed all the dumb ones. All the smart ones would like, okay. But they were fighters. They'd been doing war for a long-ass time. And ideally, as well, for stand-to, you start all the vehicles at the same time. So you have a count, like, four, three, two, one. Everyone starts their vehicles at the same time. So the bad guys can't go, okay, there's one vehicle here, one vehicle here.

Okay, so it's everyone's up, running, and then you guys are smoking cigarettes. Well, I went to bed, and I heard this voice. Watch your language. Sorry. Beep that out, Chase. This voice goes, what the heck, guys? What the heck? What the heck? What the heck? And Smitty gets up, and there's burn holes in his sleeping bag, and there's ash on his hair and in his face. Apparently, I had been standing right below him while I was smoking. What?

And so he's screaming at the top. You know, it's like echoing off the hills in Germany, right? You're just ashing on him? He's like, I didn't know. I didn't know he was down there. It was dark, you know? Damn saggers. You're just ashing on him? So...

It is a slur. My squad leader, what's going on? He runs over. Shut up. It's stand two. You've got to be quiet. And he shows him the holes. Who did this? Who did this? I'm like, well, I don't know. It was probably me. I know who's about to do it. Nato. Right. We actually get back. He gets madder and madder the longer.

Let me get back. And when you come back in from the field, you'll clean off your gear. Right? Clean off all the mud, right? So we have these rooms to clean off all our gear.

And, you know, he's like egging me on. We're cleaning off our gear and he's like challenging me and stuff. And finally he throws his gear down and goes, that's it, Macbeth, I call you out. And he storms out. To a duel? What is this? Third grade meet me by the flagpole, you know? And my squad leader was like, you know, he called you out. You got to go do it.

Now, this was relatively... 90s was a hell of a time. This was 60 pounds ago. So I was 5'10", wet. I'm 155 pounds. I don't think your height change is wet. I'm very confused by this. I got a part of my body's height changes when it gets wet. That's Nick's fucking Tinder profile.

So my squad leader's like, dude, he called you out in front of the men. You got to go fight him. I'm like, oh, great. So I'm skinny guy, 5'10", 155 pounds. And this guy, he was a former firefighter. At least he said he was, right? Like, you know, who knows, right? Volunteer. He was a big dude. He was like you. He was like, you know, a barrel chested dude. I'm a big dude, apparently. And I'm like, you know, I thought, you know, I'm walking out there thinking, oh, man, this guy's going to kick my ass.

And I go up to him. I think it's going to be one of those, like, I throw a punch, he throws a punch. Break it up, guys! Break it up! That's if you have battle buddies. They're like, damn, he's getting his ass beat. Stop. We fought for like three freaking minutes. He beat the crap out of me. Someone's going to stop at any moment. Now, your face is just getting pummeled in. He beat the living daylights out of me. From that day forward, you hated saggers? Yes!

So the funny thing is that a platoon sergeant from another unit comes out of an early room and says, break it up, guys, break it up. And I'm like bleeding. So you've seen the other guy? We do. He's right here. He's quite fine, actually. He was fine. He was fine. I say to my squad, they're like, sorry, why didn't you just stop us? He goes, you know, I don't like Smitty either. I wanted to see you kick his ass.

After the first minute you didn't notice, it's not going that way. That's the modern Ukraine conflict. Mcbeth is making his hands hurt, don't interrupt. Hey Eli! Whatcha doing?

You're just filing taxes. Well, that's not what my taxes look like, but either way, I'm here to talk to you about ExpressVPN. Why are you here? Oh, I see you're using incognito mode. Did you know incognito mode won't hide what kind of taxes you're filing? What do you mean? It doesn't matter what mode you use or how many times you clear your browsing history. Your internet service provider can still see every website you've ever visited.

Do you want people to know these are the kinds of taxes you're filing, Eli? Wait, are you in my house? What makes you ask that?

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All right, so I got presents. Unfortunately, I didn't get one. I didn't know you were going to be here. Oh, you're good. But, you know. No, okay. Thank you. So these are my pre-privileged. Open it up. Okay. It's the second best thing to come out of Maryland. Old Bay. Old Bay seasoning. Brandon, I'm so sorry you missed out on this. I'm not a seafood guy at all. So, like, that's easy. I'm putting it in my bush light. Dude, you can put it on popcorn. You can put it on French fries. Can you put it on bush light? Maybe.

Maybe. I was about to say, it's not Tahine. I would snort that stuff. I've never tried Old Bay, so I might just take a little... Give me a little dab on that knife. Are you really going to fucking...

I'm from Maryland, baby. Jesus Christ. Oh, shit, I didn't think I was gonna do that. This podcast has gone on for quite some time. That is the most sociopathic shit I've ever seen in my life. Congratulations. I'm an infantryman and I'm a Marylander. Well, I'm retarded. I was like, he's gonna...

Chase, I think we have to technically blur that. I don't know the rules for that. Nobody ever thought the fucking rules about that!

Just put a drawing up that said he snorted it. Leave it up. There's going to be some fucking mod YouTube. If the YouTube executives have to have a meeting about whether or not they're going to monetize snorting seasonings, I'm happy. If you get demonetized, I apologize. I get demonetized all the freaking time. I'm thinking of our fucking YouTube rep just sitting there like Ben Affleck with the cigarette.

We had to have a conference. Actually, I told them our beautiful YouTube rep misunderstood what I said with we had the two World War II veterans on and he was like, and something else. We got to blur that one too. Yeah. Chase, blur that.

It's a shortened word for Japanese people that is exactly what you fucking think it is. I thought it was shortened for jalapenos, but I'm just... Also that, yeah. That's what we meant. That's what they meant. Yeah. Come to find out that got age... Not age restricted. Yeah, age restricted. Or demonetized. Demonetized, at least. For that. And I was like, hey, can you get that checked again? We fixed it.

It was what they said in the time. He's like, well, I'll try to pitch that to the guys. So the next day he's like, okay, I'm on the phone. He's like, okay. So I just tell them that it was how they spoke in the day. I was like, what? He's like, well, you told me to tell them that it's okay to say. I was like, no, I didn't. No, we edited that out for you, buddy. No, you do not have to go.

Balls to him for making that argument to Silicon Valley. I'll make that argument. They need to be racist. Listen, it's just like your grandfather in the back of a video thinking about who's allowed at the front of a bus. It was a different time. No, for real though, I don't think it's any different than saying Nazi. No, that's just what they said back then. Well, no, but it's also like in the context of like...

Yes, the Nazis were German, but it was a very particular type of German at a very particular point in time. You fucking Nazi. I've got a joke that you're going to love. All right. All right. So I'm not racist. It's now the 10th day. But I've got a joke you're going to love. 10th day of the Ukrainian incursion into Kursk. Right.

and vladimir putin doesn't know what to do so he calls stalin's ghost he says stalin help me nazis are in kursk what do i do stalin goes do what i did send your best ukrainians and ask for u.s weapons good good let's talk about the ribbon trot maltov come go for it nick okay fine

So because you, if anybody hasn't seen Ryan's content, he's really good at like, really good at like finding misinformation and propaganda from Russian sources or pretty much any other ones. But you track stuff back. And one of the things that I like looked into a ton was the Ribbentrop-Molotov pact of World War II. And Vladimir Putin, I think it was 2018 or 2019. Yeah.

went and made it a law that you're not allowed to, well, you're allowed to talk about it. You're just not allowed to have the incorrect opinion about it. And they've actually arrested people and it forced the, not the UN, some other government

gigantic agency to like put out a statement that like no the Ribbentrop-Molotov pact absolutely was a catalyst for starting World War II. Who else would have been like NATO, EU? It might have been EU. Yeah. I think it might have been. Can you explain? I'm not familiar with this pact. The Ribbentrop-Molotov pact was a non-aggression pact between Nazi Germany and the USSR. Okay, I've heard of that. There was also a secret portion where they had agreed, hey,

I'm going to attack Poland. You should attack Poland around the same time and we could attack it together. And then if you did that, you can have this part and I'll have that part. And then we can all split up Europe together while we're not fighting, but we're also not allies, even though we're declaring war on people at the same time and not fighting each other. Which they had a great time until Hitler failed the trust fall. Yeah. You got it with that one. You just spit all over. You just spit on it.

I do want to talk about Poland for a second. Like, okay, so if you guys have seen someone... Poland doesn't even like to talk about Poland. No, no, I think they do. European Texas. Almost a joke. They fucking exclusively talk about Poland in my comment section. Anytime Poland's mentioned, they...

shit their pants. Well, I made the joke about little European Texas and people like, well, why do you call it that? Why do you call it that? And I was like, okay, let's go through the... And this is just off the top of my head. These numbers may not be perfectly accurate, but Poland, when the US said this is for sale, they said yes. That's pretty much what... The United States government has 270 HIMARS. We have 270 of them. You know how many Poland bought? As many as we sold. 460. HIMARS? HIMARS. The high mobility...

Our artillery rocket system. Oh, gotcha. The box that shoots the giant rockets. Which is basically the box on it. The one with the box. Which is got a Ukrainian fucking really bad. Were you like a 42 Alpha or something? It was infantry. They were really good with guns. That shifted tides in Ukraine from my understanding. I'm like learning a whole bunch. We can make HIMARS fast enough. Let me see. They just bought their...

building 48 new Patriot launchers to create 12 new Patriot firing batteries. They're building 600 K9 artillery pieces, 800 K2 PLs, the freaking tanks. They bought 250 M1A2 SEP V3 Abrams main battle tanks. Like literally everything

anything they can get their hands on, Poland's like, yes, yes, yes, yes. Sick of people fucking with them. Bro, like they are. If anybody has a historical reason to be worried about Russia. Yeah, it's Poland. So that's why, oh, they're armed as fuck now. It's cool to be in their TA, their territorial army. Like, to be at college, if you're not in their version of the National Guard,

If you're not in that, like, you're not getting a girlfriend, dude. Because your girlfriend's probably in the TA. They are the European version of a battered women's shelter. I shouldn't have found that so fucking funny.

Oh, man. We may need to edit that out for me. I found that way funnier than that fucking shit. Just for that one spot of him laughing, it just goes back to normal. I should not have laughed that far. I feel bad. No, you don't. No, I don't. Holy Jesus Christ. Yeah, no, Poland is, I mean, that's just...

They're building, and this is the thing, Poland, I thought like Poland just got fucking steamrolled, right? I paid attention to history. Well, when I started digging into it. White death. They have, well, no, that's Finnish. That's Finnish, yes. Isn't there a Polish sniper? The Winter War. The Winter War, yeah. Was there a Polish sniper that was Finnish? There was probably several Polish sniper rifles. CMO Hoya.

Simo Haya is Finnish. That's the way it is. Oh, sorry. I thought that's what you asked. Yeah, no. No, you said Poland. Never mind. Yeah. A couple hundred miles. They even have like... I was looking into some of their history. So they have a museum ship and we have a museum ship, right? We have the USS Constitution just in case any fucking rapscallions want to get a throwback to like what we did to...

the brits in the 1800s but um so i was like looking into it and so when germany or when germany and russia invaded poland like they took all their ships that were built and just bailed out to the united kingdom and then just proceeded to fuck with the germans up the english channel like that's all they did was just fight with germans just oh there's some germans let's annihilate that shit with their their battleships that they had they just they had two of them and they were like we're gonna

you up as much as we can which to be fair based yeah no it's not dude like they were literally like you know when you play risk and the first person that like really loses their like area of operation but they have like a couple little territories that's literally poland just fucking with everybody else all of world war ii they go to their first alliance they're like hey dude can i just like operate in this little area that you own and i'll just fuck up the people we don't like and they're like sure there was it was polish artillerymen that had voitek too

What's Wojtek? I don't know that. Wojtek is the Polish artillery bear. Oh, yes. From the Battle of Monte Cassino. Wait, they had the bear that actually would walk around chasing... Pull that shit up. And they used it to interrogate somebody? Yeah, it was hilarious. They used it to interrogate someone? That is the best way to interrogate people. You're going to get waterboarded or be... There's a bear standing behind a guy and you're like, hey, where's Muhammad? And the bear's just like...

You're going to say like real fucking quick. I'm going to just leave the room for about five minutes. We declawed him and took his teeth out.

Still really strong, I think. Still gonna hurt you. Not neutered. He's very horny right now. We gave him Viagra. A horny bear? A horny gummy bear. That door opens in six minutes. I guess my mom's not watching this show. I could have told you that before we started.

This is where I think it would have been a good idea to watch an episode of the podcast. What am I getting into? I watched your AK-50 thing. I appreciate that. He has no idea what the offenders are. Oh. We'll get into that in a bit.

You want to do it now or you want to wait? I feel like it's better if we warm it up. Just kind of like, what is it, Votok? Voitek? Voitek, there you go. Better when you warm them up. The whole story. They had a Polish artillery bear. It was hilarious. He wasn't moving around. He's the bear. That's the way it's changed in my mind. Back to the Molotov pack. The reason I brought it up was because

I think, and I've seen other people have said that the reason he actually cared back in 2019 to start shifting the narrative around the Ribbentrop-Molotov pact was because the argument for why Russia shouldn't be in control of Ukraine was always, well, you know, you started World War II. You started this issue. You don't get to complain that it didn't work out your way or you're a huge contributing factor. So there's kind of the argument that Russia's been –

keying up the disinformation and propaganda years in advance. And I thought that that would be interesting to you. And it kind of goes right into your alley because I watched your video about tracking down Russian bots on Twitter and proving it. It's pretty fascinating, honestly. Before you go into that, you do amazing work. And the level of in-depth stuff you go into, I'm like, holy fuck. This dude was infantry? Yeah.

Yeah, you know, I'm pretty surprised too. You definitely got way higher on the hazmat than you just decided. I'll do that one. I'll do that one. At first I felt like, alright, four years and I'm done. I stayed and I kind of liked it. I went to college while I was, you know. He heard you could get naked pictures on these computers. He's a fucking expert now. Yeah.

I was that guy in it. I do know how to set up a local area network for grunts. But that being said, I went to school for computer science while I was in. And I got a bachelor's in computer science, a master's in engineering management, and then later got a master's in cybersecurity.

And, you know, it used to be I'd find the bad guys and we put a hellfire through their window. Right. And now I find the bad guys and I expose them online. Okay. So sometimes I still do. I do want to ask. And you can like blink once for yes, blink twice for no. So we don't, you know, violate anything that may be from a three letter agency. Were you or were you not ever personally or or helped responsible for a AIM 9X attack?

the knife missile, unaliving a human in this world. I don't do weapon earring.

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Fuck, I don't know what to do. That was the biggest non-fucking answer I've ever heard. Bro, I was like, I don't know what to do now. I don't know what to do with my hands. Nick, help me. That answer was... That answer was... Once the information is out of my hands, I don't fucking touch it. That answer was, I've never played Hot Potato. But there was a guy that was blindfolded, and I told him the direction. Okay, fair enough. That's like, God, one of my...

One of my relatives, we'll say, was in the Pacific Theater, and then he was in Korea and then Vietnam. What he did in Vietnam, he did a little bit of spook work. And the only thing we were ever told was that he would go up in basically spy planes, like observation planes or whatever, with some of the locals before the United States was in Vietnam. And they would just take pictures.

And they would take pictures of, you know, observation bases or whatever and whatever they took pictures of. Look at them topographical nudes. The next week when they went up, those places weren't there anymore. But his job was to take pictures. Were they in like a U2 or? I couldn't tell you, to be honest. I genuinely don't know. But that was the only thing we were told is they would take pictures of stuff. And then it just so happened that the next time they went up to take more pictures, the things they took pictures of weren't there. Was it like an Air America kind of thing or? Yeah.

I genuinely have no clue like what. Air America was like the CIA's Air Force. Oh,

Apparently this... Never mind. I probably shouldn't say that. I mean, maybe I could. I don't know. Three-letter agencies apparently still operate four F-117 Nighthawks for the United States military. I didn't know that. Yeah. We have four of them in our inventory and they're operated by three-letter agencies from what I was able to find on the internet. And that's just what's declassified. Yeah, that's... Well, like, this is the thing. Recently, we've come up with some shit. All right, my misceletism is going to take off here. Do it. Right? No pun intended. We've come up with some...

And it's just, it's, if anyone else in the world had done this, we'd be like, oh my God. But because it's us, the world's like, like they're just so used to us coming up with weird shit. So we took a standard missile six, which is a surface to air. I think it also has surface to surface capability out of a vertical launch system on an Aegis fucking destroyer. And we like, yeah, let's put it on the bottom of that F-18. So now we have the AIM-174. Yeah. Yeah.

What? By the way, it's the return of the Phoenix missile. The missile can go further than the F-18 can see with its radar. So the way it's going to work is another plane can lock onto a target that AIM-174 fires from beyond the horizon. That is so fucking cool. It's literally the...

baton race. It's so terrifying. It's the F-35. The F-35C will find the bad guys and the F-18 is the bomb truck. That's the missile truck. That's just so terrifying. You could be chasing an American aircraft and be like, ha ha! And then a telephone pole comes out of the

stratosphere and sends you back to your god like that's just the most terrifying shit and then i would hate to fight america like i got a guy up here we need to kill okay look how fast that jet's going what the fuck dead all right you know i can i can tell you i i have no idea what went through someone's mind when they decided to fight us i could tell you well

5-5-6. To start, you know, there was a, we had, there was this one guy, I remember he was, he was jam, you know, the, sorry about that. Oh, you're good. This one guy, he was jam, you know,

And the kid worked in the Iraqi police station. And he was kind of assigned to us as like a little helper boy. Like we'd give him a couple of bucks and he'd go get Aish or whatever, bread and Cokes and stuff like that. And one time I saw that he was taking down like our bumper numbers on our vehicles, you know.

Oh, he's a town band. Yeah, he was jammed. Mardi Arme, right? And I was like, dude, you know, I'm going to cut him out of the beak. I was like, you know, Omar, are you going to kill us today? La, la, la, la, la. Dickie, bukara, bukara. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I kill you. Would you like to meet a bear? I have a super-bippy bear. But...

At the same time, you probably experienced this in Afghanistan. Anybody who stood up got cut down. Which they've never seen a bear in their life, so that's already scary as shit, by the way. The fuck is that? They just made it like that scene from Rogue One where they have the tentacle alien come in and interrogate the guy. It's like, what the fuck is that? I have no idea. It's a shaved bear dressed as a dominatrix. Jesus, Eli. That's called warfare. You know what I mean?

You know how much a dominatrix- I don't wanna scare the shit out of these- I'm an American and that's scary. You know how much a dominatrix costs in Washington DC area? Do you? Why do you? $350! I'll tell you that. What the fu- Guys, I started- He's got fucking two white claws on this guy. I wouldn't touch this to somebody else's lips. How much old bay did you use that day? Yeah, I just-

Now, when I evaluate someone for spreading disinformation, I humiliate them online. And then I find their email address and I send them a bill for $350. Does it always start with...

$350 of dominatrix services. If you want to be humiliated on the internet, I'll be more than happy to do it. But I'm going to charge you for it. So I was... That's phenomenal work. I'm sorry, I just... My mistletoeism... You threaten them with prostitution? I sent him a bill for $350 for humiliation services. I actually... I was at a convention and I met a woman who...

She was a TikToker, and she makes her living... We do post these, by the way. Go on the internet. Keep going on. I met a woman who was kind of like an online dominatrix. She was a TikToker, and she would charge, and she would just, from the comfort of her own home, humiliate men online. I'm thinking, how...

Men, we are to blame for this. We are to blame for this. I don't know what this is about. I guarantee she's making six figures. Oh, guaranteed. Guaranteed. Not only that, she owned three houses. This was in Arizona. It was in Arizona. Three houses. She was like renting two of them out, living in one. And I'm like, I'm here making videos. This is what happens when you don't kiss the homies goodnight, gentlemen. This is what happens. Saving the way like a sagger. Making internet videos. This is what happens.

This is what happens when you're talking down to people. Are we just going to roll it all together by the end? He's going to be like, oh, so this sagger had his... Right?

when you don't think about the roman empire this is what happens yeah this is exactly it uh poor chase but your miscellanism sorry jumping back to my miscellanism so there's two two more things one uh this is still in development right now i just heard about this thing never seen a picture of it i have no idea how it functions but i don't know if you know very recently the united states navy did a sink x where they take an old ship and they're like we're gonna fuck this thing up until it sinks yeah which is cool i love that we do that they

They took a B-2 stealth bomber. By the way, there's two countries in this world, those who use the metric system and those who have stealth bombers. So...

I think it's alarming how long we have them. That's my favorite part. They still work. They almost have a bomber that's comparable to the B-2. It's like that shit we had 48 years ago. How many fucking centuries? But... Sucks to not have Howard Hughes. So they drop this bomb and it's a bomb from obviously a stealth bomber. Cool. And they're like fucking 50,000 feet up. Cool. But it's called a quicksink bomb.

And it's literally designed to fuck up boats, which is a great name. Awesome. I don't know much about it, but apparently it can track down a boat traveling at like 45 knots. So from the stratosphere, a stealth plane can drop a bomb that chases you the fuck down on a boat.

God bless America. I love that. Okay. Why is it called the quick sink? I'll show you. You don't want a slow sink to quickly sink your boat. That's what it's designed for. What does it do? I have no clue how it works. I don't know shit about it.

It's still, from what I read, it's still in development. I don't think it's fully out of it. Okay, there's a boat in the water. Oh, wow. It's called a fucking bomb. I would assume. It's just a big bomb. It would just be some sort of explosion under the surface that creates a vacuum. No, it is. It destroys. It's under the water already. That's crazy. It could be one of those things we did for Mr. Beast with his boat. Watch. I mean, this is.

By the time the smoke clears, it's just underwater. God bless America. I love it so much. That's amazing. God, make sure to leave cookies and milk out for Raytheon tonight. It's so good. And then the last thing. It's so good in Mad Libs. A missile goes down your chimney. Oh my God.

That's for the bad boys and girls. I can't talk about the weapon earring. But so very recently, we know Iran was playing a game of fuck around and we helped them find out a little bit. Honestly, it was just a flex. So they fired X amount of drones, like 400.

drones and missiles at Israel, right? And obviously Uncle Sam was up there just playing fucking whack-a-mole. We were having fun. We were using it to just train. That's really what it was for. We just set up our pilots. We're like, take out as many drones as you can. Whoever comes back with the most wins. Every single one of those things was a lifetime of minimum wage taxes. Like, that's what it was. It was just...

So, but what they did is they, for the first time in history, I believe it's the SM three. I'm almost positive. It's the SM three. Cause the SM two is like a Patriot kind of in the SM six is more like a fad talent. So the SM three is designed to go way the fuck up there.

So they smoked a missile outside the atmosphere. Now, that may just sound like amazing and cool on its own, but like I want to put this in perspective. So when we defend... Outside the atmosphere? Yeah, exo-atmospheric. It went outside the atmosphere and said, I'm going to fuck you up out here. You're not hiding from me. That's crazy. It's like straight up Iron Giant, I am Superman. Yeah, like from a boat at sea level.

Okay. But the crazy thing is, so most air defense systems, like we work best when we are the target. So like if I'm protecting an air base, I'm on that air base. And as the missile comes in, I shoot it as it's coming back down in its terminal phase. Patriot shoots in terminal, THAAD shoots in terminal. So the phases of flight of a ballistic missile going off on a missile is launch, boost, apogee, separation, and terminal. That's how an average ballistic missile flies.

At apogee, which is its highest, which is usually when they're outside the atmosphere, depending on the missile, they're also moving the fastest. They have the most amount of energy. The Navy said, fuck you. I'm going to kill you when you're your fastest. So now I'm 100%. After seeing that, I'm 100% convinced that the modern U.S. Navy can smoke an SR-71 Blackbird. Just because of that, you can't get high enough and go fast enough for them not to be able to kill you. Which...

When we were talking about this a little bit earlier, I am 100% convinced that we absolutely did not need to do that. There's no reason. We just did that for practice. We're like, I just want you to fucking know we can. Like, that's the amount of just, I'm going to do this because whatever reason. Like, I love that. When I tell people, like, Patriot is a good system. It's a fucking great system.

Aegis is better in every way, every shape of the idea. I tell people like the easiest way to compare them is Patriot can see you if you're the size of a softball and about a hundred miles away. That's kind of the common connotation. Aegis can kill you if you're 190 miles away in the size of a golf ball.

And that's 190 in any fucking direction. Horizon to the space station, wherever the fuck you want to be away. Is that by proximity of the explosive? Or is it like the actual in from launch? Depends on the interceptor. We've had it since the 80s. Yeah.

I know it's an old system. I just don't know if they're considering lethal range, like from when the missile explodes in the blast radius or if it's like impact a golf ball. So I believe it would be for that. I'm also not sure if you're allowed to say. Well, I don't know. Now we're in that weird territory. I don't know for the SM-2, 3, and 6 that they still use. I don't know which ones are proximity and which ones are kinetic. So Patriot, like...

Pac-2 is a proximity shotgun blast. I'm going to say this the exact same way. A CW-3 said this. I'm not going to say his name in front of my entire battalion, okay? Pac-3 is like some of you boys when you were 15, tip to tip.

He said this in front of the whole fucking battalion. It's like the interstellar thing. What are you doing? Docking. And pack two is like some of you other boys at 15, tip to explosion. And I was like, fuck. He said this, and I just all of a sudden, quietly, this man should lose his job immediately. But we're like, fuck.

He's a CW3. This is the only podcast for him. We got demonetized. Was it the slurs or the government secrets? We are the... Legit, we are the War Thunder podcast. Brought to you by... Which podcast did we give away military secrets on? You don't remember which one. They were a couple. Oh my God. We never gave away... Sorry. You gave away secrets? No. That's fine.

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The summer sun is here to stay, so trust Manscaped to keep those pubes at bay. We need a history lesson. Tell us some cool history shit. I'm so good. Wait, wait. Hey, history man. When was that system developed? The Aegis combat system was in the 80s. So this is the thing. Like,

That's what makes it more terrifying because it's like that is from the 80s tech with AI and the weapon systems coming out from that. It is a killer robot. It is a killer robot. What's so crazy about Aegis, people think Aegis, they think of an Arleigh Burke class destroyer. No, it's the whole fleet together.

So if Aegis, if an S or a fucking- Oh great, we built a hive mind. It pretty much is. Yeah. So if it decides, so like let's say a radar anywhere in the fleet picks up a target. Elon's sweating right now. Yeah. Picks up a target. It can go, cool, I'm going to kill that target with that boat's missile and fire it. Like it's fucking insane what Aegis can do. That's really-

Wait now is it so it'll be like hey, this is the closest boat to yes, and I will just take this I was saying it's like it's a baton pass. I guess fucking technology and it's doing it while it's moving on the

...ocean and fighting in hurricanes and shit. Like, my radar, if it, like, sinks half an inch, it's like, re-implace me. And I'm like, fuck! The missile knows where it is because the missile knows where it is not. But sometimes it doesn't know where the ground is. I don't know if you know that. Yeah, Patriot chased enemy missiles into the ground in 2003 because it didn't know where the ground was. But now we teach it where the ground is. Oh, allegedly. Oh, yeah, allegedly. We didn't do that. There just happened to be a couple of bankers above the ground.

Oh, you want to... Go on, Brandon. You want to get off the gold standard? Neat. I think I've laughed more in this podcast than any of the other ones I've been on, man.

Dying right now. We're doing all right. We're doing all right. The kids are okay. Dude, I will say the last time you were on with Demo, you, me, and I was like, this is going to be the biggest episode. It was like demonetized. Really? Yeah. I don't know why.

Lots of fucks. Lots of fucks. It happens. It's fine. Chase, you got that. It was me? Yeah, you said, I think it was 17 fucks in 18 seconds. That was aggressive. You kicked off my misceltism, okay? That's a you problem. He's teaching shit to the army. Just fly. It really does. Like, I...

I want to be like, oh, you know, our military is like so great. And so like the military, anyone who's been in the military realizes that all it is, is it's taking a mirror and showing it to the population. Like we're just like 40 year old mirror. It's a portal to the shit we had 40 years ago. Yeah.

I did a video just the other day, just actually technically last night, where I used Medea as an analogy. I could do battle by myself. And someone commented and they said, how do you know Medea? I'm like,

I was an infantryman. Did you ever see the infantryman friend group meme? Yeah, you had a black dude, a Hispanic dude, a white guy wearing a cowboy hat because freaking, of course. I'm just, I'm watching you like explain like, okay, so there's the current Ukraine situation. So anyway, drawing back a comparison to Norbit. You know, a good movie is a good movie, but one of the neat parts about being an infantryman or being in the military is that you have this friend group that you would never normally have.

Yeah, and you go out to the club when you're in Germany. Two white guys, one of them has a cowboy hat, one Hispanic guy, a black dude, and an Asian dude. And you're all buddies. They walk into a bar? Yeah, they all walk into a bar. Sometimes they even get thrown back out again. Never. Never, ever happens. Period. I've closed a couple of bars. Oh, yeah, I think everyone. What was your favorite experience? Just going out with the boys in a different country.

Was it Germany or where? Yeah, Germany. Well, I mean, I've been to Germany, Fort Stort, Fort Bliss. If you had to have like a great time and go back in time, any of your boys in any country. Savannah. Pivotal. Pivotal. Boom. I don't know. Pivotal. It would be River Street in Savannah. Really? No shit. At least. I've only been a couple times. I've never really...

Mania was the 90s, you know, it's the 90s and you're... It's kind of... Ford store is kind of weird because it's like you go out... Romania? All right, so if your wallet hits the ground in Romania, what hits it first, germs or a Romanian? Jesus Christ! Fucking Christ, man! You know what they call a... You know those lock boxes they have for mail and shit? Like, you know, you go up with a key and open it and get your mail out. You know what they call that in Romania? Free stuff. Yeah.

An advent calendar. My Romanian followers are like, this is not funny. It's alright, your AKs are shit. Ooh.

Ryan's like, when did I get myself into that? My mom is not going to be able to watch this. If you're in the infantry, this might interest you. I did a video with Demolition Ranch today, and he let me pick the topic, and I wanted to answer the age-old meme question. Are you familiar with the meme of where you're grading different calibers and 50 cal is for when there's a bad guy hiding behind the fridge at your neighbor's house? I wanted to know the smallest caliber that you could actually do that with.

So we actually did shoot through a house, through a fridge, into a ballistic shell torso with different calibers to find out which one it was. 22 penetrated much further than I thought it would. It made it, dude, it went through an exterior wall, through the back of the fridge and dented the fridge door. Were you shooting through a wall and then space 30 feet in between? No. That is the big one. That is the big one. 22 has probably killed more people.

than any other freaking caliber. Because the gangbangers can't afford the big ones. Or it's like, oh, you know, it's just a .22. I knew a guy, this is a buddy of mine, who his sister was like this, that her ex-husband was banging on the door, banging on the door, let me in, let me in, and she took 22 rifles, if you come in here, I'm going to shoot you. And he broke in through the door and she shot him, hit him right in the chest, and he fell back on the railing.

And he's lying there and he takes out his cigarette, lights a cigarette, and the police come. You know, he's there smoking his last cigarette. The police come up to him. There's a hole right in the sternum. Police come up there. The bullet's sticking out. And they just pop it out, put a Band-Aid on it, take him to the freaking... Take him to the police station. And what's funny is that...

That wasn't hilarious a murder story My friend killed this guy right? My sister met another guy and this guy heard that story and so he bought her a real gun, you know like a 38 Yeah, you know you say he bought a bigger gun which which to me I would think is like you might be signing your own death warrant here She already shot, you know one boyfriend eventually she broke up with him and

He said these two became friends. The two ex-boyfriends became friends, and they would hang out around town at the bars and just talk about her. I don't know what it is about that girl, but it must be something. If she was still single, I'd try to get her number. There must be something about this person. Not your sister, then? No. Okay. I was like, wait, where is this girl? Is she your sister's friend? No, Army Buddy's friend. Oh, okay. Sorry about that. I heard the same thing. Army Buddy's sister.

There we go. Okay, I was like you can get your sister's number ask your mom What are you doing step sergeant, but nine no, actually t-shirt what are you doing step sergeant we had one yesterday and

Fuck, what was it? Step Nomad? Yeah. Step Nomad. Was it Step Nomad? When we were talking about the Mongol Empire? Oh, God. Yes, it was. Step Nomad. Yo, speaking of Nomads. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. Oh, sorry. Guns. Yeah, we gotta finish this story. Nine mil, punch through the fridge. Five, five, six, punch through the fridge. Then I wanted, we were gonna do 50 cal, obviously, but I wanted to do 8.6 blackout. Because, are you familiar? Mm-mm.

I'll let Brandon explain the ballistics of this to you. It's so amazing. It's my favorite. So 8.6 blackout is like basically the equivalent of 300 blackout, but for a .308 instead of 5.56. Jesus Christ. So they take .308 and they neck it up to 8.6 millimeter. They beef up the cartridge or they beef up the projectile. Are we hunting dinosaurs in this thing? Well, the idea is that you have the energy of .308.

but uh you have it subsonic so it's below a thousand feet per second so it you know it doesn't have the pop at the ear you know if you could suppress it pretty easy and stuff and it's a one to three twist rate versus your standard ars like one eight to one twelve i mean so when they came out there was one 16. so so kevin brittingham basically developed a way that uh you were able to keep uh energy because the people are worried about okay

Energy is really what causes damage with the projectile. So like okay, so velocity is the way you do that So the e equals MC squared that C being the squared part. That's the part that matters the most the energy that is behind it Not just the mass so what they ended up doing is they increased the twist rate because if you you can't accelerate it past a thousand feet per second because then you go, you know supersonic and it gets loud it defeats the fucking purpose so what they did was they accelerated the rate of twist and

And so they had, instead of linear velocity, they had centripetal velocity, I guess what you call that.

And so they basically just keep energy in rotational energy instead of linear energy. And so they were able to make it a fucking very heavy hitting cartridge while still not breaking the sound barrier. Think of a drill bit. It penetrates like a drill. It is. It will, uh, Grantham actually might did a video on it shows how hard it hits subsonic ground against subsonic. This is less than a thousand feet per second hitting a ballistic dummy head and

I think it was like 200 or 100 yards and the head, it was equivalent to a 12 gauge buckshot going off. It just fucking exploded. Because it's also wider while it's delivering that energy and it's just, oh yeah. That cavity, it creates the second it hits and expanses. It just opens up everything. I have never heard of this cartridge. It's terrifying. It's developed by the same guy who did 300 Blackout. Yeah. Kevin's kind of a smart guy. He's kind of a smart guy. He knows his guns. Hey Fidelity. Hey Fidelity.

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He knows a thing or two because he's seen a thing or two. He hunts water buffalo with subsonics. So the 8-6 went through the wall, through the fridge, and then it started keyholing. And it keyholed through four more walls and the kitchen cabinets out the other side of the house.

Did you build a house? What range were you on where you did this? No, they had a range, but they just shot through the neighbor's house. Sorry! Jesus Christ. Here's actually, I think that it might, it would definitely be different if there was stuff in the fridge. The .50 cal was also keyholing, but that was the wall after the fridge. .50 BMG? Yeah, .50 BMG keyholed all the way through the house also. That's terrifying. Most people don't know this, but modern fridges aren't really thick. Yeah, I'll buy that. It's probably all just...

I just got a 45-70. I'm happy with that. It's fun. What do you have? Henry. Yeah, good old interaction. 45-70. The Gold Boy. Got the brass butt plate. Let's me know after about a box and a half of shells. Yeah. Feels real good. They weren't designed with compensators. That is just like a cut-off burrow. Man, the recoil is real nice on this thing. It's like a 12-gauge that's angry at you. That's what the recoil feels like. The 12-gauge is way slower. Yeah. That one's got a little bit of ass to it.

Yeah, I got that thing. I was like, I really wanted one! And then I like took it to the range once. I was like, that's cool. I'll make it like a display or something. Or just like for rapscallions that break into my fucking house. Wake up everyone. Just in case. The rapscallion gun? Yeah, the rapscallion gun. That's what the fuck it is. Fighting pirates? I don't fucking know. We're using rapscallions today, okay boys? Next to your loaded blunderbuss. Home defense shot with silverware from a blunderbuss. Yeah, exactly. Just like the founding fathers.

What was this? Okay, so almost every round went through everything? Almost, damn near. And then, well, after we found out that 9mm and 5.56 would go through a wall, through a fridge, and into a ballistics gel dummy, then we moved the ballistics gel dummy into the bathroom shower while still shooting through the fridge into the shower. Where the fuck were you shooting? Was it in one of the abandoned houses? Yeah, so he bought an abandoned resort from the 1990s. Probably should have started with that. No, it's fine.

So he has two, like, neighbors. The Motel 6. I mean, they're, like, full of mold. Like, you can't. There's nothing you can do. They just need to be torn down. So he's like, well, I mean, let's shoot bullets through it. I mean, pretty unique opportunity. But so we had 50 Cal rounds hit a ballistics gel dummy while the rounds were keyholing. Those were terrifying. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's how you shred humans. A dude had a new armpit. It was bad. Yeah.

You could see the round do this through his torso. Geneva's not a big fan. No, no. That's why the M16s got reworked because they would start tumbling, right? Back in the... Oh, yes. The original Mattel models? The shit ones, they would start tumbling. Mattel, I think that's an urban legend from what I was told. Really? Okay. Yeah, because Mattel made a toy around the same time.

and people thought that it was... It's not a fucking far stretch to say that like an American toy company or something like that would be making a show. Brunswick, the bowling ball company made the gun grips for my 1911. I mean, the same guys who make your

Washer and dryer make the fucking gal 19. So like it's not really a huge stretch I need to clean my clothes cool. I also need to destroy a fucking convoy You're never gonna believe this We have you covered

Because the bullets would yaw. Yeah, so I've interviewed quite a few Vietnam-era infantrymen that were running point, and all of them, when the M16s came out, fucking hated them. And most of them, all of them except for one, I think...

had their wife or their parents mail their either Mossberg 500 or their Remington 590 from home, and they went around through Vietnam with a fucking shotgun. So I was actually just talking about this a little bit earlier, about the early M16s and, like, one of the things that did it. And, you know, Wendigoon did a pretty good video on that. Like, missed a couple things, but, like, he did fucking a great analytical take on what actually happened there with the military-industrial complex and, like, really just, like, the...

the people, the powers that be not wanting to move to the M16 and ended up sabotaging it. Like the, the,

the cartridges that they were using at the time the manufacturer like eugene stoner basically saying like hey you should never ever use this type of powder for the cartridge for the 556 that you're using for this and they were like yeah but we have a shitload of that powder and it would be a lot cheaper and they already hated that and they wanted to keep the m14 or whatever it was so they they used a lot of that powder and it caused a shitload of issues i

Loaded jamming issues with the M16. So it wasn't exactly a problem with the platform. It was a problem with the ammunition that they were given in tandem with the platform. Without cleaning kits also. I think it had to have been part of the environment too. Because even in your Trump video where we do the ear shot. Everybody's watching the ear. But if you go back and watch Brandon's video in its entirety.

You can actually watch as soon as it clips the ear, it clips that much ballistics gel and within six inches, the round completely keyholes. - I will also say this, that is a problem with the distance that we were shooting it from because you have an issue where, sorry, this is like you're touching my face now. - Oh yeah, I'm loving it, go for it. - Once you get past a certain, if you're within a certain distance of the round leaving the muzzle,

certain rounds are worse like honestly 545 one of the worst if you actually watch it leaving the barrel like in the larry larry vickers videos it takes a while for the i guess rotation of the round to actually catch and make the rifle round go straight okay and it the the tail of the round will actually fish around for a bit before it locks in so it's because we were so close

Because we ended up wanting to replicate it dead on where it was hit and blow the head off the dummy. But I mean, that could also make sense from those Vietnam guys' perspective because if a dude's popping up from 20 feet away out of a bush and you're trying to shoot through brush. Because one of them told me they hated the M16 because the bullets would ricochet off grass. My point is... Is what he said. I'm not saying that's true. You had to shoot a guy two or three times to get their attention.

Because the rounds were going, you know, it was green tip. That will potentially be a problem. But the thing is, any rifle round, no matter 5.56, whatever, it will do that. You'll have a period where, like, basically, think of a Nerf football, where it takes a while to right itself. We need to go back to 45.70.

So the original was a 1 to 14 twist rate. So it would rotate every 14 inches. That's why we're saying with the 8.6, it's 1 to 3 twist rate. So you have like stabilizing well before it even... Every 3 inches you're making a rotation. Versus 1 to 14, which is...

No wonder it was key holing shit at that time or tumbling. Cause that is, those were 16 to 18 inch barrels. I'm guessing for the original out, out for the original. I'm pretty sure it was 20. Yeah. So one rotation before one and a third. Yeah. That's crazy.

We're back from the after show with something we forgot that was important. It's our organic cut. So, Ryan. Yes, go ahead. We have a superhero group that is like the Avengers, except that we're

Yeah, that's a great word for it. Yeah, sure. We all have powers that are normal like superhero powers, but we have offsets that the group gets to choose that are, let's say, not safe for work. Okay.

So we would like to ask you if you'd like to be a part of our superhero group. What power would you choose? Is there any money in it for me? No, we can give you the examples. God, you are crazy. You told me about the offenders, but I've never been asked to join. Oh, my God. We're going to double. Okay. For example, Eli's power. I am Crime Cook. I can travel at the speed of light like the Flash.

Unfortunately, I can't interact with objects for five minutes after doing that. He gets there and just has to bear witness to whatever crime he wants to stop. I can take notes in my head. Ma'am, are you okay? Fight harder. You have a superpower, but you also have a... An affordable offset that we determine. You get to pick the superpower, we get to pick the offset.

My superpower is I can find the clitoris. You're gay. *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *Line* *Line* *Line* *Line* *Line* *Line* *Line* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien* Lien*

Instant toast. In all honesty, this is not a bad outcome, but we got to talk about this poop thing. He got his real superpower. He doesn't have to fuck with the thermostat. That's what he really wanted. Oh my God.

Holy shit. Go on. What's your super power? I am crying. Shit. I don't even know where the fuck I'm at. How can I top that? I can go back in time five minutes. Only where exactly where I'm at.

I just need to recoup my foot. Why are you giving yourself offsets? I was like, pick a real superpower. Okay, fine. I have the power of inconvenience. I can move your table one inch to the right to make you stub your toe. That's an offset. That's an offset. Pick a fucking superpower. Fine. How about that? You're gay. Okay.

Come on! That's just everybody's from now on. That was like your weirdest proposal in the history of the world. Fuck. They shook on it and everything. Oh man. I mean, they're good. They got it. We don't even need offsets now. Fuck.

Welcome to unsubscribe. That was the funnest offender's bit we've ever done. Oh my god. You were in Fort Lewis? Yes, sir. Strikers? Yes, sir. Eli's got some fun striker stories. I've smashed my face on a striker. We ran it through a building striker. We've done a lot with strikers. Have I ever told you what 19 kilos, as I used to be one, refer to the MGS striker as?

I was in the first MGS, I was in the first MGS striker or next to the first round ever fired in Iraq with the MGS striker. One of the first kills with an MGS striker. Like right here was the ticker. And as my buddy, we were in a firefight. I got hit.

Gun went off. Ennis thought it was an IED. He was like, that IED was crazy. I was like, that was the striker. And then Sarko shouted to you. He was like, you good? We're like, yeah. What the fuck did you just shoot? That was a dude. It's the reason I ask you a question at brunch and you say, what? Well, because this is the thing. When I was a 19 kilo, the only reason I couldn't stay 19 kilos because I was kilo four trained and not Romeo four. Now the difference is kilo four was on the SEPs, the system enhanced package, the more modern tanks. And then I was a 19 kilo.

And Romeo for they were trained on the MGS striker. And back then, President Obama was like, we don't need tanks anymore and whatever. And so thanks, Obama. Yeah. And so all the guys went over to MGS and I was like, cool. I want to reenlist. They're like, pick a new job or get out. And I was like, I like missiles. And that's where they sent me. Yeah.

Yeah, we used them to literally if there was debris to get on senators. When we were exfilling on that mission, there was debris so we couldn't get out because the Iraqis felt like debris so we couldn't exfill onto the main MSR. What did we do? Sergeant comes up, I got it. I can undebrief that real quick. Yeah, really fucking quick. Alright.

Okay, drive through. Realistically, artillery was one of those positions that got a buff by God or technology or whatever. Because it's like, alright, we're just going to sit back here and just lob a bunch of shit at the enemy as soon as we're like, yeah, computers can make us hit it within a

toenail everybody's like what is this way more terrifying i tell you right now i have never met like a group of people in the military who love like eliminating humans as much as field artillery like i'm just telling you like it's so strange they would like i'd be in the smoke pit hanging out with these guys and i talked to one of them he was a 13 juliet so his job is uh like uh he works in the fdc like getting people you know like getting them on target

And there was apparently some Taliban guy who was talking about this. The guy doing math, right? Yeah, he's the guy who does math. It's literally like the kids in China doing math on the abacus. It isn't there. That's him. Like, these degrees, get them. I guess the way he was saying it. He's calling in fucking strategists against Taliban. So he's telling me. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Woe be upon you. Yeah.

So he's telling me, he's like, there was some Taliban guy like popping out of a cave, shooting or whatever, and then getting back in the cave. And so they were like, hey, you know, deal with this. And he's like, okay, I mean, I can get one shot, no problem. And he's like, okay. And he's like, all right. And he did the math and he told them their deflection. I'm not using the right fucking words, FAA guys. I'm sorry, I'm an air defender. And like, he's like, you know, round out and they fired, cool. And like 30 seconds go by, dude popped back out right on him, like at his feet.

Good dude. 155, mind you. Like, that was a triple seven shot. For one dude? For one dude. Because that's all they had, I guess, was triple sevens there. They didn't have one one-nighters. And so, like, everyone else in the talk was real quiet because they're watching this through, like, the raid camera. And he was just like, yeah! So proud of himself. Literally, like, the buzzer beater in basketball. He's like, hey, hey, hey.

Yeah, it's so strange. Everybody else is horrified. Yeah, then he's looking at us. You dropped a 155 on that guy? That was one dude. I found a foot! We got him!

That's a good day. When you get a bad guy, it's a good day. Just tell him that I was on a date and this girl said, how do you feel when you put a hellfire through somebody's window? She did not use those words. Did she say hellfire? I might be paraphrasing a little bit. What was his name? You know, wouldn't that be great though?

If you met a woman who knew about Hellfires and didn't marry her, you're dead. I won't say it.

The gay thing, when you think about it, how great would it be to go out on a date and talk about football? Oh, man. He would make fun of me for not having a boyfriend instead of not having a girlfriend, you know? I'm with it. It's just like the farts that throw me off. You'd never have to worry about the thermostat. That's true.

The only problem I can see is, like, the butt. My problem is the guy. I think it's what's attached to the butt. It's all fun and games until it's anything regarding intimacy. Hold on, hold on. The giants are great, but how do we make them better? Let's add poop. Hold on, hold on. That's gotta be a tough sell there. Hold on. That...

You have no idea how much of a crowning achievement this is. Probably the worst sentence ever said. Crowning is a great use right there. That is... I mean...

So, okay, you guys ever have like, okay, so this is guy talk here and it's being fucking true. Try with his Chinese food. That world's best ex-boyfriend shirt off. What that girl you're talking to ask you yesterday in one text. Sorry, what? What was the text she sent you out of the blue? Tell her about what?

Tell me about Bohemian Grove. That was her opening to the conversation, which he's the conspiracy theory guy. So it was a hellfire. It wasn't the opening. We were talking about having a thousand children whose neighbors were cousins. What the fuck? Wait, names of those cousins? Whose neighbors were cousins?

Oh, neighbor. Okay. So I was talking about being fruitful and multiple. So, ah, yes. Ah, yes. Okay. Certainly not about vaginas being assholes. Okay. On that note, and this whole part's probably gonna have to get cut the fuck out. But anyway, so have you guys ever like had like guy talk with your buddies and you're just like, you're playing video games. You're just shooting shit about whatever you're like existential. You can like conspiracy theories and all sorts of shit. Somehow we ended up on the topic of like gay, gay,

Man sex, okay? Stay with me here. Stay with me. And I was playing video games. My wife heard this walking by, and I was like, you know, you ever take a poop and it feels really good? So I'd say like 50% of butt sex probably feels all right. And like, she just looks at me. She's like, what the fuck? And you don't have to worry about the thermostat. Hey, Alex strokes. It's just the end of this conversation.

This is way too many military people on this podcast right now. We found how many people it takes to make this game. Let's close this podcast. It will get each other. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. ooh. Ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh. ooh

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Right now, GhostBed is offering 50% off all their products. Just use code UNSUBSCRIBE at checkout or go to ghostbed.com slash unsubscribe. Please buy some at ghostbed.com slash unsubscribe. I'll be under your bed if you need me. You got what? You got three 11... You're 11 Bravo? That's a 68 whiskey. 68... He's honorary. It's fine. 68 whiskey is fair. Jesus Christ. You got two 11 Bravos and... Hey, medics have one job that I could never fucking do and that's not sticking a thermostat in someone's man's... or in another man's...

And that's triage. I could never do that shit. You really do that? You really put IVs up a guy's rear end? The silver bullet. I've done that once. I thought you were talking about rectal thermometers. Yeah, rectal thermometers. That happens a lot. It's usually reserved for when somebody's malingering. So we've had people that would like, I'm going to come to the aid station four days in a row because I think I have heat stroke at 8 a.m.

over and over and over again so he can get out of doing his job for four days straight. It's like, all right, well, here's a note. Hand that to the medics and they already know, but it's just like, it's time. We're going to get the core temperature for sure and we'll see if you come back tomorrow with fucking heat stroke. My girl's a medic, so the one time I had a actually legit medical issue at some point and my blood sugar fucking tanked to where if it wasn't for her, I would have been face down on my

kitchen tile like bad off and she fucking like ends up straddling me on the couch rubbing cake icing in my gums as like all right so if this doesn't work for you and if this doesn't you know end up stopping you from passing out the next is I have to take that same fucking finger of cake icing and shoving it where the sun doesn't shine so you better stay awake and I have never been more motivated my

I will pretend like I'm okay. This is when I really understood autism and sensories and taste. Ryden hates medicine. We had to take him to the doctor one time. He had to have a rectal medicine inserted. And then we were home. He got sick again. This is like six months later, a year later. This is your son? Yeah. And...

I remember he was like, I'm like, you gotta go to the doctor, buddy. You're sick. She's like, no. I was like, we gotta take medicine. He's like, no. I was like, okay, it's medicine or it's the butt medicine, like the rectal medicine. He's like, okay. I was like,

I was like, okay, wait, you want to do the rectum medicine versus normal? He's like, that's fine. I was like, okay, this is autism for a whole. Really? God, my God. I was like, it's a pill. Are you sure? He's like, it's fine. Freaking send it. Yeah. I was like, now I understand autism to a new level. He'll do that over regular medicine. I'll never call it a big deal for you. Never mind. I'm sorry. Okay.

It's a big deal. Got it, bro. I thought you were just overreacting. All right. Gung ho. Yeah, that's... Well, this is the thing. So you're with a girl who's a... Is she a nurse, medic, or... Yeah, flight paramedic. Okay, flight paramedic. And then you were a medic. And you got a purple heart, so you've been around medics. You've been around medics. I'm a CLS qualified. Medics have...

I know everything. They have two speeds. And like, I've never experienced the second one, but the first one is, oh, you're being a baby. Like no matter what it is, like you could have something as long as they know it's not life threatening. You have yet to.

yourself up bad enough for them to give a shit. They're like a smack. You got like fat tissue showing on your arm. They're like, yeah, you're a bitch. Go get some duct tape. You're fine. Right? And then there's the one where they're like trying to act cool. They're like, you're going to be fine, dude. You're going to be fine. Like, I never want to look a medic in the eye and be like, you're going to be fine, man. I promise. That's when shit has gone downhill real fast. There's a real comforting factor to your being a bitch. Yeah, like this.

That's the second part of the training kicking in that you're about to die. And you're like, make sure you tell them it's cool. And you're like, it's cool, man. You're not going to die. You're going to be okay. You're going to be okay. Pulling tourniquets out of lying pressure. Oh, man. I will tell you, so tourniquets. Holy shit. Yeah, my arm was cut off and reattached. Yeah, it was. Next time, start with it. What the fuck?

That is a scar-scar. You want the whole story? Sure. Yeah. No, start at the end. We already fucking did it. 1994. You know, Private Macbeth, you know, joins the Army Infantry. That happened in the military? No, no, no. This actually happened. But it goes all the way back. All right, so I had this drill sergeant. Drill sergeant ranks.

Eddie, you talk like this. Like when I became an instructor, I wanted to get a voice modification. So when I talked to my puppets, I would talk like this. That's exactly how you would talk. And he was like a god. He had been in Panama. He had been in Grenada. He hadn't been in the first Gulf War. He was on the trail then. He was a drill sergeant.

But, you know, we— Revered the guy. We revered this dude. He was like a walking god of infantry knowledge.

And I remember one day someone had an ND, negligent. In basic? In basic. And it was actually in the starship. Did you go to Harmony Church or Sand Hill? Sand Hill. I was at Sand Hill. Wait, Harmony Church? Yeah, it's like the older. Okay, yeah, they didn't have that. So, we had to, you know, when you put away your weapons, you pull the trigger. Oh, this one guy. I guess he wasn't inspected right.

Oh, so it wasn't like an ND-ND. He did it into the fucking... Well, he did it... The designated area. Vertically. Oh, shit. Okay. And then... As a private, you were... That's a fucking... That's a problem. And it was a problem with the drill sergeant. He goes in like Shang Tsung comes out. He's like, your soul is mine. And then the private dies. These drill sergeants, they smoked us, I want to say, for about two hours. Yeah. And at some point, I was like, I'm going to quit. I don't want to play Army anymore. I'm going to quit.

And I don't know if he was saying it to everyone, but he said it to me. Now, this guy, by the way, Drillstar and Rex, he used to make me carry around a book of Shakespeare's plays. You know, they go, Mac, we would be waiting a chow, you know, Santa Parade Rats. Macbeth, Macbeth, where's Macbeth at? I wants to hear a sonnet. Yeah.

I have to run out with my little book and read it. So yes, it was. Do the voices, Macbeth. So yes, it was blackface. Ah, ah, ah, Macbeth. You so funny. Ah, ah, ah, ah. I don't like white people. I make an exception for you.

We're definitely on black faces. So this guy. So I was picturing the full-on UNSC armor. I was doing, I was on my bag. I was doing flutter kicks, you know. You fought pretty good, Paul Brink. This guy, he puts his round brown like one millimeter, one millimeter in front of my face. He goes, pop it, make bet.

Never give up the will to live. And I was like, okay. And like at that moment, I didn't give up the will. I decided I was going to push through this. And I did. I graduated from basic and eventually I became an instructor. I got to teach soldiers, which was one of the most rewarding moments of my career.

Now, the funny thing came when I got out and I did triathlon. I don't look it. They call me an iron marshmallow, right? I don't look it, but I do triathlons. I do marathons. Who's they? Everybody, it wasn't me. My wife. God, wouldn't that be great? Just conjure her.

I can't even get a freaking date. It's tough being a smoker and a gun owner in the Washington, D.C. area. You're not the one guy who asked how you felt after tossing a hellfire. That's true. So I was riding my bike, and I'm riding and I'm riding and I'm riding, and it was 5.30 in the morning. And I take a turn. I take it a little too fast, and I realize that I'm about to hit a light pole. This is in, like, Odington, Maryland. I'm, like, way far out.

And I'm about to hit this concrete light pole. And at the last moment, I do this. You know? And the light pole cuts my arm off. No, it's still... Like, is it off-off? It's hanging by a couple of tubes. Dude, when you say that, it's not great. Like, look how fucking... Yeah. And I can only move my arm like that.

So I remember I'm sitting there and I'm thinking to myself, do you have like finger mobility and shit? Yeah, I went to physical therapy for a year. Like my gunshot looks like, I don't know, I got a bad mosquito bite. No, I... It looks like a fucking... Yeah, this was not from combat, but I...

I actually went to physical therapy and I did everything they told me to do, which is why I probably slowed most of my, I can't like when I try to pour M&Ms in his hand, they all fall out. I don't know how crap I can't do that. Right. That's why you walked in a bike and then fucking cheese, a bicycle bicycle. Yeah. So a tri bike, it was going 18 miles an hour. And that's why I live off of my firm belief that if it doesn't have tits or a motor, I don't ride it.

Good idea. So I'm lying there and I'm like, how many seconds do I have to put on a tourniquet? I got 15 seconds. Yeah. And so I have my guardrail at 89 miles an hour. Like God intended. I got one of my bike wrenches and I tightened down my bike jacket. Holy fuck. They don't tell you how much it hurts. Oh, dude. Yeah. Ours did. Ours was like, it's going to.

Be terrible. Turn until the bright red blood stops. It hurt. It was the worst pain of my life. And I remember I picked up my arm. I look at my phone. And I'm like, all right, I don't have a signal. When was this? About 2019. Oh, god damn. Holy shit. And so I'm looking at my phone. I don't have a signal. I'm out too far. I'm thinking, all right, I can stay here. Or I can...

If I stay here, I'm going to die. Like maybe a freaking, a jogger will come by, another cyclist. But if I stay here, I'm going to die. And I remember my drill sergeant, never give up, do you? And as I pick up my arm and I start walking and I start walking down that trail until eventually I get a signal and I call 911 and they're like, well, we don't know where you are. You need to keep walking. They actually sent an ambulance and I had to walk to the ambulance and

they didn't even come out a little thing they made me get on then they hit every freaking bump there did you ever reconnect with that drill sergeant i did not no if you're watching this they're probably sergeant what's his name drill sergeant rick's drill sergeant ricks if you're watching this

He never lost a wheel. Or a drill sergeant that was black and had that voice. Comment below. They take me to the hospital, and it's a teaching hospital. So they send these nurses in, like these student nurses in, and some of them are coming. And I guess they don't get a lot of amputations there, so they want to show them what it looks like. And I'm lying in bed right now.

And some of the nurses come in and they're like, ooh. Turn around. This one nurse comes in and goes, how'd this happen? I told her. And she goes, I wouldn't have been able to do that. And I said, yeah, you would have. She's like, this guy's weird. Turns around like, he's mentally ill too.

That guy's racist. Therapist on aisle nine. We're going to send mental health down here and the doctor to fix that arm. Don't worry, we got you. More surprises, just that fucking scar is gnarly. Yeah, I mean, you should have seen it. I can show you the x-rays. I look like the Terminator. I want normal pictures. I just want you holding the skull, but it's a tibula. Yeah, just...

I can show you the... We can't show more of them. I know, I know. I would like put it up on the screen, Chase, and blur it out so you just see like skin color. Most of my left arm is red. I am like the Terminator. I don't even... Eli, where did you get shot? I don't even know where you... Mine was like the IEDs did more... They shook my brain more than...

The bullet, because the bullet grazed off the... It bounced off the wall. It rode down the wall. So it lost a lot of the kinetic energy. Was it like a grazing wound? No, it just hit and then barely went in, stopped, and then I just had a massive...

bruise that wrapped all the way around because the next day I went to the wrong aid station did not get any time off it was on a mission the next day the most army shit I've ever heard in my life yeah I went to the wrong hospital after I was shot so I didn't get a day off yeah and they sat down on the striker and just climbed over me he put his hand right down on my leg to climb over me I was like ah

He's like, oh, shit, sorry. And then it was supposed to be an easy mission. Oh, yeah. Ennis knew I got shot. He just forgot it was in that leg. Then it was like, hey, we're not. Dude, we just lost two dudes and a team got sent back. We won't go on missions. An hour later, we got a mission. It's going to be easy. Yeah, we got to do it, guys. I used to have a commander that was like that. I'm going to go there.

I'm gonna fight for us. I'm gonna go to battalion. This is BS, Bravo Company. This is BS. And then an hour later, it comes back. Well, Bravo Company, we gotta do it. We're a Bravo Company. Literally, we're a Bravo Company. That sounds like the most generation kill shit ever.

I'm Michael Che. And I'm Colin Jost. And we've got a little secret. Actually, it's a pretty big secret. Well, now you've got to give the people something. No, I'm not saying a word. Oh, then people won't know to tune in. Come on, tell them a little. Like how we're hosting a comedy event streaming only on Peacock? Exactly. Or how it's called New York After Dark and it's a comedy show that only features drop-in comics? Boom! You nailin' it, dude. I know Michael Che's phone number's... Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, hey, hey! New York After Dark. It's some kind of comedy thing. And it's streaming now. Only on Peacock. You love it.

I bought a little company and then ran up to the mission. It's an easy mission. No one's there. I was like, okay, I'll lead it. I was leading the squad. And then a machine gun goes off. I'm like, fuck, I'm in a field. So I like pivot around the house. Everyone falls. I was like, what the fuck? I was like, hey, what the fuck is going on? And then Holly peeks out. He's like, hey, sorry, that was us. We had a breach with the 249. I'm like, why the fuck? Did no one...

We had to breach with the 249. Yeah, I don't know why they had to breach with that. For reasons. I tell you right now, we had this guy... I look back on it and I'm like, it made sense at the time. The construction standards aren't great. A foot works. Yeah. We had this guy. You say what you want about the 249. We had this guy, Face. Not like Face from the A-Team on his Texas ID. He looked like Leatherface. He's the ugliest motherfucker you ever met. But I love Face. His name is James Haynes. Leatherface from Texas. I'm telling you, he's an awesome dude. I love him.

and he took his gangster grip for his saw and put it on the side like a tommy gun and then fucking wolf hooked it to his shoulder and that dude hip fired like a g dude face was the shit i loved face man he was good dude everybody either has like on the 249 everybody either has like a horror story or they loved it there is no in between and i think it all like from what i've heard it all depends on your armor yeah like whoever took care of it like if you replaced the springs you replaced everything like it ran great but if you just fucking let it

ride for 20,000 rounds, you're fucked. I had this other saw gunner. He's part of the reason I'm deaf. Marlon P. Makoko. He's a little Filipino kid. Best. I can tell him, hey, Corporal, you're a fucking Makoko. Chew through that door. Roger, Corporal. And he wouldn't even fucking question it. He would just go. Like, best soldier I ever had, man. And Coco, he kept that saw, like, immaculate. It doesn't matter if he didn't fire a single...

around like you could eat out of that saw it was immaculate and then that little son of a bitch he cleaned the 50 cal on my truck one day and it was like perfectly clean and i was like coco what are you doing he's like i cleaned the 50 sergeant i was no you don't clean the 50 that way man no what are you doing so i was like washing your coffee cup yeah

You put it in the dishwasher?

I had to explain it. I had to show Makoko, like, no, the .50 fires better dirty. Like, the M2, she's just, she's better dirty. And then, so we took it out to the room. She finds a groove. Like, it's just a perfect spot. And that was back in the day where you still had to do the headspace and timing. Nowadays, it's just shove it in, twist, and it's done. Wait, for real? Yeah, they fixed, yeah, they fixed headspace and timing. It's the A1 or M2. Still the M2, but it's just the new barrel. Yeah, the M2A. Yeah. The new... What the fuck? Our barrel...

Our boys are nodding right now. It's our shit. We just shove it in like three clicks to the right. All right, we're good. Yeah, you know that's what I'm talking about. It's walk it in, rotate out, look in the window, good to go. A lot of you don't know this. If you would have got a M2, if Civil War would have happened, you would have found a machine gun out in the battlefield and you'd be like, cool. You would not have been able to make that thing run worth a shot. No, it would be a single shot piece of shit if it didn't explode.

What the fuck? I did. It's not working. Carlos Hathcock figured it out. Oh, you just did a video on that. Oh, yeah. Did we talk about that? Well, he had the world record for the longest confirmed kill for a long time with an M2. What was the exact distance? It was 2,500 yards. 2,500. Jesus Christ. That's the thing. Like an M2. About a mile and a third.

Everyone... Like, in my chats and stuff, they'll ask me, like, what is your favorite weapon? Like, if it's not, like, a specific style of weapon that you're asking for, like, favorite pistol, favorite this, it's the M2 heavy barrel. Every single time. It takes the reliability of an AK with the accuracy of a fucking sniper rifle. Like, it's just...

It's a bullet hose. I love it. I love everything about it. Mark 19 will jack somebody up. Mark 19, I have never seen a single... Alright, I'm just going to go off on a soapbox here. Everyone gets tangent time. Go on. I've never seen a weapon system that has more issues than a Mark 19.

I hit the mark. I could never get one more than like three shots out of it without having to fucking re-rack it. I've never seen... You gotta take care of it. I put the whale sperm in there and the shit that they gave... Well, that's... It's a different type of lubricant. I don't know what it's called. They just like put the whale sperm in there. I'm like, all right, I get this fucking tube of grease and like wiping it around in there. I don't know what the fuck it's made of. Because I have seen like people like sit there and have to kickstart this thing. Like it's a goddamn motorcycle from the 50s. Yeah. It's...

And I get it's probably the same thing with the saw and whatnot. Like, if you replace all the shit, you keep it, like, immaculately lubed and whatnot, and it doesn't have, like, a billion rounds through it, it's probably okay.

But I have seen people have so many fucking problems. Ours were so unreliable, we took them off our trucks and replaced them with 240s. So we had two 50 cal trucks and two 240 trucks. And I'll let the pig eat. I love the 240. It's a good solid weapon, mounted or dismounted. I love the 240. You also can't do escalation of force with a Mark 19. That's true. There's one setting. Shoot a warning sign. Ah!

this is a grenade launcher i hate this story with the warning shots yeah i want to say who what they ran away this is 100 true also mark 19 uh stores

Love you, buddy. He had one in round when we were clearing it. The weapon system was fucking up during clearing. You don't say. Weird. Imagine that. And they tried to demote him until they actually found out it was the weapon platform. Because he's like, hey, this is not fucking doing...

I just cooked one off in Baghdad and we're like, uh-oh. No way. So they have... Sorry. The 40 mils, a lot of them have a minimum arming distance. They don't have a maximum. Exactly. That shit landed way up and then went somewhere. I mean, if it landed somewhere soft, just hope a kid doesn't pick it up, I guess. That's just... What? What?

I mean, yeah, it's a great hope. I found a golden goose egg. I'm sorry. Some of those kids got really good at demining. The ones who didn't, well... They were hopping around, yeah. Darwin. Fucking...

Mark it on the FBZB2. Playing Minesweeper as a child in America. How the fuck do I play this game on my dad's computer? Playing it in a different country. Whole different experience. I tell you right now, so we live right next to a minefield in Afghanistan. Like literally, you go out the gate of my cop and like 100 yards away, minefield starts. We didn't know it was there. The 82nd who we ripped out with like didn't tell us it was there until we were driving one day through this big open area. What's that? Where is this?

Malajat, Afghanistan. Oh, okay. Got it. Chicago. Yeah. Chicago. No, and we didn't know it was there until we were driving along and I looked out the window and I saw the red side of about four rocks. That's how they marked them there. The little Afghans will take a rock, they'll paint one side red, one side white, and they're like, okay, don't go on the red side. And we were on the red side. So that's how we figured out it was there. Jesus Christ. I saw, I met, in that minefield- That's one of the reasons why Burma's never won the Olympics for soccer. Fuck you.

That's it. Jesus Christ. Fuck. And like that, we're canceled. That was the one. Yeah, that was the one. I like Nick gets this look in his face. Good. Sorry, I just think of things and I say them. I met two Afghans out by that minefield. One of them was a straight up American capitalist. Like I would have imported that man into the United States and made him a citizen. Because like he was...

We kept on hearing like explosions like two or three times a day. And we're like, what the fuck? And we go like way out there. There's a road that you could get through the minefield. And on the far side, there's some dude digging in the mountain. And he would like dig as far as he could and then go dig up a landmine, put it in there, and shoot it until it exploded to get further. He was pulling gems and shit out. I think that's called stimulating the local economy. I couldn't even be mad at this guy. I was like, don't dig in the minefield?

Like I, I had no one, like no one knew what the fuck we were supposed to tell this dude. And the other one, we saw this guy on the raid camera. He was out there like digging around, like looking for a landmine. We're like, all right, second, let's go talk to this dude, figure out why he's looking for a landmine. When you say raid camera. So there's a camera on a giant pole that sticks up like 50, 60 feet in the air. And you can like zoom in anywhere around your cop. Yeah. We call them raid cameras. Yeah. And, uh, so saw this guy cruise on out there. We're like, Hey man, what are you doing? And I,

to this day, I don't know what the disagreement was, but he was like, you know, I do not like my neighbor, so I take, let mine put it in front of his house. Like, that's, like, he was fucking mad. That makes perfect sense. Carry on. Like, what are you doing? I got no idea what the fuck to do. Let him go. I love him. In the,

In the United States, you could not waterboard that out of somebody. He was just like, I got no problem with you. My neighbor, fuck that guy. They are still like that, though. Yeah, that's the... Oh, 100%. That is... Like, death is no big deal over there. It's strange, man. I had a...

I don't know how much I should say about this, but somebody that I used to know back in the day, like he had sent a video at some point where he was Lebanese. Okay. And he had sent a video of him firing a PKM into his neighboring village. Jesus. Just somebody I had talked to because I was curious about, you know, culture and things. They had certain like weapon systems that like we don't have access to. Oh, you've told this story. Yeah. And I was just like, oh, okay. So it's a guy that I was talking to. He's like, yeah, this is a video of me shooting a PKM into my neighboring village where like, I'm like,

"Oh god, you're serious." And I'm like, "What the fuck happened there?" And he's like, "Oh no, it's all good. After we did this, they shot back at us, we shot back at them, and then they decided to declare peace by offering our village another PKM. This was all over a goat."

Yeah. And they were just like, they shook, the elders shook hands and it was done. Like, wow. That's, it's holy fuck. That part of the world, man, is so just strange. Like the way they are about just murdering each other. You know what? I don't know. I mean, ancient civilization used to handle it. Ancient civilizations found alien technology. Yeah. Oh, it is so dope. I mean, it is dope.

Dude, it's that, that part of the world is just so like people like, you know, well, why do they want to kill each other? I fucking different tribe, different hairstyle, slightly Browner. I like pick your fucking poison, man. Like they just want to kill each other. You're part of this. I'm part of this. Like there was these people that rolled through, by the way, uh, Eli, you were infantry. Actually, you were infantry as well. Has anyone ever properly taught you how to, how to breach and clear a tent?

It's 'cause there's no fucking doctor on it, by the way. Mark 19. Yeah, no. What's that? Mark 19. I was gonna say, flashbang through the opening, see where the bodies are, and... I don't know, I was the gym sergeant, section sergeant, I ain't getting out of the truck, I say, "Private, clear that tent." That's how I clear the tent. I just... So, 'cause there's these, uh, there's nomads. You see the silhouette of an AK from the flashbang, like, "Oh, cool!"

But no, so there was these, they're nomads and they live in Afghanistan. They're literally called Koochies. That's a real thing. I'm not making that up. Not making fun of a culture. They're called Koochies. Love those.

And there was an American that was pulling security, kneeled next to a power box, and the power box blew up. It was full of metal balls, ball bearings, and it killed him. It took his head right off. Sorry for that guy. It was fucked up. It's war. And then a week later, we found some little kid playing with ball bearings. And we're like, hey there, little guy, where did you get those? And he's like, my dad has a whole bunch of them. Where does your dad live at? Right? Right.

Meanwhile he's picking them out. So he's saying, and it was one of the coochies living there in a little nomad village. And like, we didn't know how to breach and clear a tent. So we like all got on one side and like took knives and like cut it open and like peeked inside. Fucking like, we didn't know what to do. The most horror movie way possible. We cut open the tent. Why don't you try knocking? I fucking...

You ever tried to knock on a tent? I am so glad these kids of Crossfire finally come in home. They're just playing Crossfire. Americans cutting open a tent, scaring the shit out of them. But we found like a big old bag of ball bearings there, like two or three hundred of them. And then we found some like IED wire making and stuff material. And we're just like, yep, this is the guy. So like we hauled him off and next day, Coochie Village, gone. Like the tents were just packed up and they're like, fuck this place. And they rolled out. Like they just left.

Nomad people, that's literally what they'll do. Yeah. It was wild, man. Damn. Yeah. Sucks to be a gypsy in a place we don't like. So with the Carlos Hathcock shot. Oh, yeah. So I forgot we went on tangents. Sorry. It's fine. We're going back in. Carlos Hathcock has 93 confirmed kills, like 400 probables. But he had this ridiculous standard because this was like the first scout sniper platoon in combat. So he had to be witnessed by his commanding officer.

For it to count as a confirmed kill. So that's why he has as many as he does. All of his confirmed kills... Because one of his homies was his commander. Yeah, so he was best friends with Jim Land, the guy that was the first scout sniper instructor in 1960 or 1961. And he would go out on missions with him. So his only confirmed kills are from when he was on missions with Jim Land or when he was on Overwatch duty on Hill 55. Which he did a lot of kills. Which he did a lot of. A lot. And he... The...

The Viet Cong would always just operate at night and the Marines could go out and they could take anywhere in Vietnam. They could take it over. The problem was is the Viet Cong just didn't give a shit about high ground. They were just trying to move, move logistically. So they would just like, cool, you guys take the hill. We're going to go through this low part at night and whatever. And, and,

Uh, over time hill 55 was a lot deadlier to people passing by because they had snipers and then they're like, okay, well we'll just stay extra far away. So they didn't have any guns with enough ass to reach out far enough. So Carlos Hathcock got some CBs. It was like, Hey, make a Mount for my scope off my Winchester model 70 and I'll just slap it onto a 50 Cal. And then I'll just have to re-zero my gun every time I'm on overwatch duty. I love that he started with fuck. I need a couple of engineers. Yeah. I need a couple of construction workers.

So he mounts his scope to the .50 cal, and every time he does, he re-zeros it on the same rock. He's got this big-ass rock 2,500 yards out, and that's the rock that he zeroes it on. And he said he recorded, like, three kills around the same distance, but the one that was, like, seen by a commanding officer, the first one, he's on overwatch duty, and a Viet Cong scout—

And Carlos is following him. And he's like waiting. It's the max distance. It's all the way out there. So it's on that rock. I did the math ballistically. Even if he aims perfect, it's anywhere within a six foot circle. So like he can only get it so accurate. And then he's got to let Jesus take the wheel on that. With the best conditions on that weapon.

Correct. Yeah. The best ammo. Like your best case scenario. Even then there's a degree of luck, but he at least figured with the weapon, at least I can get them to fuck off if they're trying to. And that's not full auto. That is like, boom. Yeah. Single fire. Boom. Like you're not, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Okay. One of those is going to hit. Right. Like it's. Yeah. You got to be dialed. So this scout is walking along and Carlos is following him, waiting until he gets close enough just to get it close enough to scare the guy off. Cause he's trying to, you know, get eyes on him.

And he's watching him. He's watching him. This poor fucking dude decides it'd be a really good spot to stop and pull out the binoculars on top of the rock that he zeroes the gun on every day. And he calls the commanding officer. I was like...

Come here. You see the big rock? Which one? The one with all the bullet marks on it. Oh, shit. Launches it. I also did the math. It would have been like 3.2 seconds. Yep. That's a three seconds after you fire a bullets fucking forever. It's a long time. It's enough time for you to tell yourself. I missed. No, I didn't. Yes, I did. For sure. So he fires and he's like, I missed.

And this Viet Cong guy, right when he fires it, the Viet Cong dude stands up. And as soon as he stands up, catches it right in the side of the head.

Forever away. Dude, that guy was looking at binos, which is even better because he would have seen a flash and be like, huh, that's weird. I wonder what he did. He stood up and caught it. And just gone. You know, like the second, like he was, he was deleted in reality and then just appeared in the afterlife and the pearly gate, the guys at the pearly gates were just laughing. It's like the TikTok thing. It's like, huh, I wonder what's...

In my video, I had Fluck do an edit. The edit is an outfielder in baseball running and jumping and catching a ball as it's like going into the stands, but his mitt is a Viet Cong guy. What?

It does take shooting at, I think, 2,000 yards is the longest I've shot anything. When you hit steel at that time, it is a five to six second delay from pull of the trigger, watch round go out, wait, hear the ting. When I was an SDM. To be fair, that's not the distance. That's not the time it takes for the bullet to hit. That's the time it takes for you to hear. Because obviously light travels way faster than sound.

And it's crazy. To get confirmation audibly, it's way long. You just sit there and you're like, did I hit it? I don't know. And you're waiting. Yeah, because when I went through the designated marksman course, I only reached out to 1,000. I only reached out to 1,000. But you squeeze that trigger. You're like, did it move? Because I only had a 10-power Leopold Mark IV. I couldn't fucking... 1,000 yards is like... 1,000 with 10 powers. He did this with 8 power. Oh, fuck me. Dude, that's like...

- I don't even, that's like shooting one of the grains out of a whole bay at 100 yards away. - And it's a butterfly trigger. And that is not the most you're like,

Yeah, a little mushy. Yeah, a little mushy. You don't know where the brake is. It's a machine gun trigger. You're talking about 8-power. You just went from a 6-foot variable to a lot bigger. Yeah, dude. I imagine, though, with that 8-power, he could probably see fucking bullet trace there, which the first time I saw bullet trace, it's so wild to me, right? You can see. It's like the Matrix. You see it go up. So I bet in that 8-power, if there was any wind or anything, I mean, it's a 50-cal, so the wind's probably not going to affect it. I mean, at that range, yeah, it will. But I bet he watched that round come up.

And like just slowly come back down until old boy's grape got popped. Like that's fucking beautiful. And he just hit his side of his head. If he wouldn't have stood up, he would have been fine. Right over the top of him. I would love to see recreated. I'm doing it.

Yeah, I know. I recreated the through the scope shot to prove that that was possible, and then we're going to recreate the 50-cal shot. We don't even need to because that's like the one thing he did that nobody disputes. It's still a gang. We're still going to do it just to see if we can. I want to see what the bullet does at 2,000 yards, like a 50-cal with that much energy. Apparently enough. Oh, yeah, 100%. It's enough. That is a large, large round. When you're going up heavier, it's a little more. Right, Brandon? Yeah.

A little heavier. I know when we did the shot for 2,000 yards, it was 300 rum. We could have done a 338 Lapua, but 300 rum was a little more fascinating. Yeah, Remington Ultramag. Okay. Oh, got it, got it. Yeah. It was a little more. It's a more difficult shot because it is a smaller round technically versus 338.

that the wind and everything affects the bullet. So I want to say 50 BMG is lethal out to like some stupid distance. It's like lethal to three miles or something like that. 3.5.

There's a certain metric you use for amount of energy delivered on target at a certain range that is still determined as lethal according to US military standards. Even if it was at 4 miles, the .50 BMG bullet's heavy enough, I wouldn't want somebody to overhand it at me. It would still fucking hurt. 700 grains of fuck your bitch. Like, it's...

It's a heavy ass round. Well, I mean that, that new one, the new world record, uh, I guess supposedly out of Ukraine, there's no video of it. They're confirming it themselves. It's like some crazy ungodly mound. It's like, I want to say it's like 2.3 miles, but he did it with a 20 millimeter anti fucking light armored, like gun. And I have no idea what kind of load he was using or anything like that. Like those, those modified cords are using or what? I have no idea. I think would either be 12. I think it's 12, seven with,

Okay. You have one of those. There's a picture of it. You can probably look it up. Like, whatever gun he used, he's, like, posing with it. It's massive. And they're like, yeah, it's 20 millimeters. Like, it's for anti-light armor. And he was just fucking popping Russian grapes at just crazy distances. However, you know, when you're in Ukraine and doing stuff like that, like, we broke a record. Like, that is probably one of those fucking, like...

the Ghost of Kiev kind of things. God knows what the accuracy is. But here's the thing, too. If I had a 20mm and I'm looking out there and I see just a group of Russians, my margin of error is pretty low. Were you aiming at that one? Yeah. When you got 15 dudes on top of a BTR. I'm not playing pool.

That's that's not the bullet with your name on it's more like to whom it may concern So I think what we were gonna talk about earlier is some of the online Yes, oh you I literally was just looking at disinformation was like you pissing off everybody left and right and center good

I enjoy it. I just saw, I actually have it on my phone. My old boss, Major Adam Craft, he lives here in Texas. He wrote me and he said that Putin authorized the sanctioning of Ukrainian bloggers, meaning he's authorizing killing Ukrainian bloggers who are helping raise money for Ukraine. And I'm thinking like,

Wait, I'm your Huckleberry. I think. Hold on. I can have that feeling again and not go to jail. Oh, yeah.

Typical Sig guy. Didn't Russia just convict a gymnast or an ice skater of high treason for donating money to Ukraine? Yeah, it was like $56.70. Convicted over high treason? Yeah. Holy shit. What do you want to know about disinformation? I'm pretty good with that. I mean, I just think it's interesting how, I guess...

That's how war is going to be waged. You did a video where there was a Twitter account that was you taking down misinformation of a bot. I guess, how do you initially determine...

a target like when you're scrolling your feed on instagram or twitter x whatever the fuck you want to call it and you're like ah that doesn't seem right what's the process of going from like seeing something strange to proving it it it really it a lot of it depends so uh so a lot of it's the same as is targeting like when you're when you're doing when you're you're finding a bad guy right um i i found bad guys before and then i give that information to my client and my client

you know, those whatever with that information. But, um, the typically what I look for is I look for stuff that it's hard, it's hard to play. It doesn't smell right. And usually people will send me information or they're consistently lying or consistently, uh, filling a Russian narrative. So once I discovered that, the next thing I do is I take down like all their tweets or all their posts. And the next thing I do is I develop what's called pattern of life.

Now, typically this is what we use to kill people. So like I can figure out when you wake up, when you go to work, when you eat lunch, when you come home, when you make lunches for your kids, when you go to bed. I know, you know, I might know, I can even theoretically know what room you're in and I can use a, well, I wouldn't do it. That's a weapon hearing thing, but I might use a tail or a bomb just to just hit that one room that doesn't destroy the entire house. All right.

So after I developed proof of life, it's fascinating. What blows my mind is people go to the same places every single freaking day. They go to the same places every day. You wake up, you go to work, you stop at the gas station, you come home. Luckily, we don't. No, apparently you don't. But most people, they do the same thing every day. They wake up, go to the gym, go to work, go home, go to the grocery store. So you develop a pattern of life.

And from that pattern of life, you can go, okay, typically this person is online between this hour and this hour. They fall offline at this hour. Okay, this is when they're at lunch. So you can develop a pattern and then you can actually take that pattern and go, okay, where does this pattern fall into play with a typical eight hour workday? Okay, it's in Belarus. Okay, so this is where this person is. So then there's other tools that I can use. And one of the tools is if there's an email address, one of the ways to grab information

Is to look at records of when people have updated their antivirus Interesting. Yeah, huh? Yeah, you can say okay So damn it McAfee has this email address in those whale used in an updated antivirus. Okay. Yes Okay, what computer are they using? Oh, that's interesting. What is their keyboard language? Oh, it's Cyrillic. Oh

That's interesting. Yeah, Cyrillic is a word. What's that? I'm sorry. Russian. Oh, okay. Thank you. That's okay. It's that little packet in the beef jerky. Don't eat that. Don't eat that. That's the best part. Honey, don't eat the Cyrillic.

So, yeah, basically, that's just one of the ways. There's other ways. Like, I found this one dude. This dude claimed. It's over, mother. I hate the Ukraine. It's too late. So, this one dude claimed that Israeli snipers were shooting Palestinian kids in the head. All right? Now, Israeli snipers use .338 Lapua. All of them?

Oh, for the most part. Or is that like a, like, I don't know. Well, 338-LAPUA-308. But you know what a 338-LAPUA does to a human body, right? Yes. At least you can imagine, right? So no one's bringing their kid in with a little hole in their head going, oh, my son was shot by an Israeli sniper. This one doctor claimed that, that he went to Gaza and he wrote an op-ed about it. And I read the op-ed and I'm like, that's weird. He said he got a headache from the drones overhead. I'm like, hmm, that's weird.

You know, these drones are flying way higher than you can actually, you know, hear. Maybe depending on the kind of drone, but usually the drones fly too high for you to actually hear them. That's why they're, you know, that's why they're stealthy. So it's kind of like those like Facebook posts where they have like a full intact 5.56 cartridge with the rest leaving. A fucking AR-15 round hit my house. Yeah, exactly. I mean, no. Remember, if it hits your ear, it'll take your head off. If it threw, if it threw. So,

So there was just a number of inaccuracies with these stories. And so I said, all right, I knew the name of this doctor and I knew where I knew that he had a practice in three places in Virginia. So I went and I bought his cell phone milk data, his advertising data. When you go into a supermarket and

Your phone is connecting with the Wi-Fi. And that's why when you go to the checkout counter, you get an ad for Rao's Pasta Sauce. Because you were standing in front of the pasta sauce aisle for 10 seconds. And the store knows how long you're standing in front of that pasta sauce aisle. So it'll send you a coupon. So I'm like, man, I'm scared. I was like, oh,

That's why I turn all my shit off. You're married, right? Yes. You're married. So have you ever said to your wife, like, hey, we should go to Italy?

Oh, I know that time. Yeah. And then you go to the bathroom and you come back and you look at your phone and you're like, oh, wow, there's ads for Italy. My phone's listening to me. No, your wife Googled trips to Italy and your home router knows that your two phones are searching. So that's why I get so many anti-Semitic memes. Damn her and bus plug ads. I'm not going to spend so much time around Connor. Dang, man. Podcast with Indiana Jones. Yeah.

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So then... Oh, my God. Hold on. Hold on. How does one buy cell phone data? Because I was under the impression that you could do that, but I thought you bought it in large batches. Yeah, you buy in large batches, and you get it as different formats. You can put it into a spreadsheet. Are you just getting lucky, though? Oh, no, no. So I know what this guy... I know where his three offices are, and so I just filter the spreadsheet.

until I find a phone that consistently is at those three particular offices. But how do you buy a batch that you know is going to contain his information? So you buy it for all of Virginia. Like Geo? Yeah, you buy it. It costs, well, I think this one costs me $13,000.

But I really love my job. Even during the campaign, you know, just like to geolocate certain data. We would go for registered voters within District 23. That's just how to be smart about it. Not to spend large swaths of money. You want to be as strategic as possible, especially with a smaller campaign like mine. We couldn't afford to go like, oh, let's market predominantly on mainstream TV. It's like, no, we want registered Republican voters within this

you know, geolocation area. You guys make me feel bad and you're doing it to catch bad guys. You're trying to win an election. I just do it to sell t-shirts. I literally make dick and fart jokes as, as plain. So I'm right there with you, man. I, I, in this particular case, you're doing pretty well. I just, I figured out where this guy, uh, where this guy's three, um, three, uh, offices were, what cell phone was pinging from that, from that. I figured out where the guy lived.

And from that I can see like, alright, this cell phone never went to IAW, it never went to Dulles, it never showed up at NORC, which are the two places you would fly out of if you were going to go to Egypt, which eventually you go to Gaza, never showed up in Cairo, never showed up in Rafah, never showed up in Canyunas. This guy lied. He was never in Gaza.

It's never in God's hand. You're doing fucking God's work out here, man. So this is the thing. And I recently. That's crazy. Well, I recently explained to. I will find you. The Army. So I was trying to explain to the Army National Guard. And this is the analogy I use. Like the power of social media. Like this is why he's doing amazing work. Because so 23 years ago, September 11, 2001, the United States suffered the worst terrorist attack in world history. Like.

world history, not just American history, fucking world history. Okay. Now here we are 23 years later and we have people running around outside of colleges praising terrorism. It's because Hamas has a better propaganda campaign on social media than the fucking IDF does. Like it's, it's a weapon system. Yeah. TikTok is a weapon system. Do you have any thoughts on, I just think it's crazy looking at politics because it's like, generally speaking,

Up until like the 90s, I would say, fuck communism's been a pretty American sentiment across the board, left and right. And then like 2000s, it kind of turned into more of a right-leaning thing of hating, calling Barack Obama a communist, like bashing on communism all the time. But now...

for whatever, obviously social media, but like Republicans seem to be the one that sympathize most with Russia and Democrats seem to be the ones that sympathize with Hamas. To peel it back a little bit though, I don't think that's true at all. An allegory that my dad used to say was like in the 1980s with him going to school, he had like a very left-leaning English teacher and he used to wear a shirt. Like, of course, this is like after 1984, Red Dawn came out.

And he had a shirt that had like the fucking Wolverines thing. It said better dead than red. And his English teacher hated him for it. Like she was a very anti Reagan, anti everything like very. It's like, I feel like this has been a dichotomy within the United States for a while, even if it was a little more subversive than now. Right. So I, I, I'm, I'm going to say I'm friends with Sebastian Gorka. He's a, he was Trump's former. Oh really? Yeah. He's a friend of mine too. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So I text him every once in a while. I've been on his show a couple of times. Yeah. And we both work at Newsmax together. Really? Yeah. What do you do at Newsmax? I'm an intel guy. I do commentary. How many missiles did Iran have? Iran has 2,500 missiles. I mean, it's a living, right? It's way smarter than me. So one of the things that President Trump did

was President Trump was the first president to send lethal aid to Ukraine, Javelin missiles, which helped win the Battle of Kiev. And President Trump had the foresight to know that Russia, I don't want to say Russia wasn't a threat, but Russia wasn't the threat that the West was making it out to be. We can give lethal aid to the Ukrainians. President Obama gave blankets and night vision goggles. That's fine. Night vision goggles are very useful.

I like being warm. President Trump gave lethal aid. Now, when you talk about... What year was this? This was... I'm trying to remember. I want to say 2019.

I did a video about it, but I've also had half this bottle. Sorry, just to... A little bit more than half. Just to... You're making this up. Sorry, just to add more. I didn't mean necessarily even left-wing and right-wing politicians. I was just talking about people on social media. So that's because they're not real.

This is, I think, what we wanted to dig into. That's because they're not real. Dead internet theory. I don't think there's any Republicans running around praising Vladimir Putin. There might be some Republicans who they don't like the idea of giving Ukraine money when we have problems here. I get that. We're really not stuffing C-17s full of pallets of money and parachuting it out over Ukraine. You mean like we do to Iran? Yeah.

Well, that's a different story. Do you know the money? Do you know why we give money to Iran? Because Iran supplies about one-third of Iraq's power. And so we take that money and we put it into a fund, and it's either held by Turkey or— because I've been asked this question on Newsmax. It's held by either Turkey or South Korea, and then eventually we release those funds. Yeah. Hold on. I have a pun to make. Iraq, pay your—

Bill, this ain't Section 8, motherfucker. We can go into why does Iraq make their own power. That is one thing, but... They had a thing that happened over the last 20 years. Yeah, right. They took a big fat L. Yeah. So...

I like that simplification way more. I'm just saying, like, I'm sorry. All you chuckle fucks out there, I have a college degree in gender studies and America lost in Afghanistan and Iraq. Find me a single strategic battle that we lost. I can come into your house, whoop your ass for 20 years, and then when I get bored of you hiding in the closet like a bitch and I leave, you can tell everybody you fucked.

One, two, you little fucking nevermind. Is it a bit reductive? Sure. Is it wrong? No. So I think we're not one of the reasons that when people say, oh, we're giving $56 billion to Ukraine, really what we're doing is we're sending them our old stuff.

Well, I'm just tossing a number out there. We're selling our old stuff. It's only about four times that. Missiles expire. You have to shoot them. They cost more money to get rid of. They cost more money to get them to the Ukrainians. Let them shoot them at the Russians. It saves us money. We get to build new ones.

And there's not enough days on the... Dude, once when we trained on the ITAS, which is the... What? You're like... I'm going to miss. This is my favorite segment right now. Trust me, I'm just... Keep going. I'm thinking of retention, and I'm like, yes. Once we... Because I have some questions, too, to bounce off after. Absolutely. So once we were training on the ITAS, which is the new tow system...

Returning on the ITAS, and this guy from Raytheon gave me his card. He said, dude, let me know when you have gunnery. We'll bring you as many missiles as you want because they're going to expire. We have to get rid of them. And one time, I think we fired 41 missiles. Jesus. In eight hours. How much was that just for you taxpayers out there? A tow missile cost $60,000.

But they're going to expire anyway, so it was cheaper to shoot them. Dude, I never thought I would get bored shooting toes. Toes are a wire gun and an anti-tank missile. Oh, yeah, I know. By the end of the day, we're throwing trash cans up in the air. Pull! They have an expiration. It's literally a best-by date. I mean... It's not. You ever bought me the HEB? It's the same thing. The toe fucks. I'll translate. You know how on, like...

Fourth of July at like 1 p.m., all the firework stands go 75% off. Yeah. That's what's going on here. They just don't want to pack this shit up and wait till next year. Fun fact about the tow missile. More pieces of armor, apparently, I learned this recently, were destroyed at the Battle of 73 Easting by tow missiles than were by Abrams. It is hell on a wire. I have a Bunker Branding t-shirt. The tow fucks. The tow fucks.

I hate when we... During my war, it was just... Our war. The AT-4 just weighed a lot, so we'd shoot those first.

It's like going on missions with them. They'll just remember these are lighter if you just carry the two back. We're like, okay, initiate the ambush with these. You can usually tell a weapon system is effective when both sides are co-developing it. Yeah. The Russians have the core. They have several. What I've learned through this whole thing is that Russia has lied a lot like they always have. But I did research on China recently and they just like,

all of our shit off of Wish is what they have. Like, literally, one of their support helicopters is a Blackhawk off of Wish. Well, they were gonna buy it. We were gonna sell them the Blackhawk. No shit. Yeah, and...

What was their Blackhawk called? It's a good thing we don't buy anything from them. Z20 or something? Z60? It's like a Blackhawk. Almost as good, but smaller. Kind of red, but very cheap, you know. Okay, next missile system. Okay, it's called a TOW, but five feet to call a SHIELD out. You didn't look

And you're Hispanic, right? Military friend group. Yeah, exactly. It's the QZ dash blank. It's like something America's already made before. I mean, well, that's the thing. So recently, they stopped developing next generation air dominance. They're just upgrading the F-22. And people are like, well, why are they doing that? The F-22 is dated. And it's like, no, we're so fucking far ahead that when we go to war, it's like we're being sent back in time. Okay, like that's just...

The real realism of it. No one can fuck with us logistically, navally, like anything. There's a reason we call it near pure. Exactly. It's insane. Like the number one air force is the air force. The number two is the Navy. And the number four is the Marine Corps. Marine Corps. Yeah. Just thought I'd throw that out there. Logistically, I have to tell you my chicken sandwich story from Egypt.

Hold on. Wait. I want to stay on the bots and people. That's where we're at. I want to talk about this so fucking bad. If a lot of these people don't exist because they're bots and it's all misinformation, do you subscribe to dead internet theory? I don't, but I would like to start killing people.

Let's talk about that. Fucking Christ. Wow. Okay. We're going to love this. We're going to love this. It's going to be great. I know where he's going. Please elaborate. So I just wanted to pose the question, like for those who don't know, because you pointed out a lot of these accounts that you think are Russian bots, and you think a lot of the chatter going on, and especially when it comes to like Twitter and things that are kind of more bot prone, which I think they have gotten better recently.

They're basically just bots talking to bots that talk to, well, at least they don't like try to sell me porn every day. They just, they talk back and forth and that just creates fuzz that basically drowns out the real internet of like humans communicating to each other. So basically at this point, when people try to like put something out on the internet, are you actually talking to other people or people largely given up and they're just drowned out by AI or bots, things like that. Sometimes.

Is that a theory that you subscribe to, if not now, happening very soon? I don't think it's ever going to happen completely because there's always going to be people posting things like, hey, look what I just ate for lunch. I just posted a message on Twitter saying, hey, I was just a bunker brain. I met Clint today. Here's some neat footage. At the same time, is the Turing test getting harder?

I will. I think with... If I can speak in on this, looking at the development of AI and VFX, fake AI... Dude, watching the new AI and then even female bots, chatbots, and how they can interact with guys...

Yeah, it's all men. Yeah, and it is like, hey, hold up a picture to prove you're real. They can do that, and you're not going to do it. So guys are now spending real whore money talking to a computer. Yes. Oh, 100%. I don't think that's that far of a stretch to just change.

change it a little more. Dudes are having naughty conversations with like AI Hermione and shit. There's a lot of weebs in my chat. Because you get to see them. Dear God, I'm just saying. IG looking, if you know what you're looking for for AI females and you can see all these profiles that are like hundreds of thousands of followers and they're, if you know what you're looking for, you're like, that's AI. Majority have no fucking clue it's AI. I'm like, that is absolutely terrible. Well, it fills a need, right? Does it really matter?

No, it doesn't matter. But if you're learning... That's a horrifying thing considering the question I asked. Exactly. It's just learning. So you're like, oh, this is huge. If this is a need, how many other needs are there? And then how can we weaponize this really quickly? I was talking with you. How did I know you're real? I was texting you when I got your phone number from...

Ethan? A guy next to me. I think that helps. The fake one. That genuinely helps my theory. I'm getting this bottle. We got it. I'm Ryan McBeth, baby. Let's go. No, I feel like you should keep going. We're digging into this now. Did you ever do the, oh my God, dining out? Or dining in? Did you ever do a dining in? Dining in.

Yeah, the dining-in ceremony where you have the bowl of grog and the... Oh, yeah. Basic training. Try to keep me away from the grog, baby. Yeah. It's a basic training when you finalize the final ruck march for infantry. That's what we did. It's the final ruck march. The only time I've ever had grog is at Army Balls. And I tell you right now, the grog is... I went to one Army Ball when I was a white... Was it the Army version of the match shot? I don't know what the match shot is. It's at the end of the night, a...

All the drinks that got spilt are fucked up that collect in the mat. Oh, yeah. Dump it into a drink. I mean, kind of. It's significant. They're like, for our time in the Philippines, they put a Philippine whiskey in there. Oh, yeah. It's cleaner. Yeah, it's slightly cleaner. Slightly? Yeah. It's alcoholic. It's not fit for human consumption. But I mean, military balls are the best experience of your life because...

Just get drunk enough to enjoy the debauchery. I will tell everyone who's ever been to one, just get drunk enough to enjoy the debauchery. The first one I went to, there was like

A couple of army wives almost got into a fist fight on the dance floor. We had a sergeant call the cops on himself because he thought he had alcohol poisoning. We had a retired CW4 pushing through the crowd because his 16-year-old daughter was brought there by one of my soldiers. I'm telling you, it was so fucking good. It was just the debauchery was just phenomenal. If any of you guys out there want to invite us as your dates, we will join. I would totally do that because I need a date like badly.

You hear that? And if you watched the conversation earlier that they didn't delete, I might have to go to the mail side. I don't know. At least I won't have to change the thermostat. That's what you're going to do. Hold on.

ever no hold on hold on hold on we wanted to talk about that back to you want to kill people yeah because i know where this is going and it's funny yes please expand uh so i actually one of the things i've been talking about since last september was we need to start kinetically targeting disinformation actors

So if you are a civilian... Based. If you're a... Based, based, based, based, based, based, based. If you are a... Hold on, I'm holding the based button right here. Potentially. Not American. Closer. So if you are... I'm curious. If you're a civilian working in a munitions factory making artillery rollins for the enemy, are you a valid target? Hell yeah.

but if you're working in a disinformation only because you can potentially be killing our guys okay so let's talk about effectors forget about weapons let's talk about effectors when you buy a drill do you buy a drill because you want to drill or do you buy a drill because you want a hole buy a drill because you want a hole right so a drill is a whole effector right it creates the hole at what point are we sponsored by raytheon

He's just like, "Shut the fuck up, Braymond." "Some of us might be." "Shut up." He used the term "effector." That's Northrop Grumman. Hold on. Alright, go ahead. Cut to you, bud. Chase played just a random ad from Raytheon. Don't do that. So, you have a... Let's get that Raytheon money. Let's go. Why do you use a weapon? You don't use a... You don't buy a Tomahawk missile because you want a Tomahawk missile. You buy a Tomahawk missile because you want an effect on a target.

You might want to destroy a bridge. Now let's say you wanted to deny the enemy the use of a bridge. Cool. You might use a missile or a bomb. You might use a cyber attack. Have we declared war on this enemy?

We're already at once. Pause. Just wait. It gets good. We're good. We're already at once. I'm strapped in. Let's go. So, thank you. That makes me feel so much better. And I'm ready to be gay. Leave the politician hat off for five seconds. So, my fellow Americans, I'm sorry. Not that kind. If a foreign bot network tells a bunch of weak-minded college students to go shut down this bridge...

Because to support Taiwan and Taiwan has always been Chinese. And by shutting down this bridge, you are fighting the imperialist, colonialist, capitalist United States of America just wants to use Taiwan for its resources. That's a weapon as well. It is an information weapon. And the effect is the same as blowing up the bridge or using a cyber attack on the bridge.

It is exactly the same. It is a weapon system. And these people who launch these weapon systems need to be targeted and killed. A weapon system that we have been using in almost virtually every country we have fingers in across the planet. And are we allowed to be targeted the same way in response? Well, that's up to their lawyers, but I'm not aware of that.

Dude, I just genuinely... Hit it! Hit the bass button! Alright. Best answer. Alright. Aren't you glad you waited? Yeah, I... Let 'em cook! I... I was... Not that I agree, but goddamn. And then you know what I'll do?

I'll go home. I'll crack open a beer. I'll order a pizza and I'll watch the Nats.

And, you know, look. You know what? Goddamn. You know, look. I obey some good shit. Last week, last Sunday, I gave a briefing to the Ohio, to a JAG, a Judge Advocate General Continuing Education Convention in Ohio.

And I laid out my case for this. And I've been talking about this since September of last year. We need to start killing these people. That if we are at war...

We need to start kinetically targeting disinformation actors. Might just target the building. Might target the data center. We might target these individual people. We might use some stuff that's up close and personal. Just to be clear. That's what I'm hearing. I don't do that. You're targeting them for speech, to be clear. Well, hold on. Well, I'm targeting them for using a weapons system against the United States. I have a question. By weapons system, you mean speech. Well, it's speech that's inciting...

a certain kind of behavior. So by speech that is inciting a certain behavior, you mean speech. Hold on. Hold on. Time out. I think there might be...

These people that you're suggesting targeting are state-funded actors that are going to a job where they have a factory of cell phones with 50,000 social media accounts. Those are the targets. I'm not targeting somebody who said, not like a shit poster. You're not talking about one. The only differentiation between those two things is whether or not the person has the IQ to know what they're talking about.

No, the difference is that it's state-funded. State-funded and has access to... It's a state-funded weapons system. Look, so I'll go even further on that. Oh, man. Do I need to move? No, I like it. I'm right in between. Let's go. We were just talking about come last episode. Military industrial complex or whatever fucking, like, you know, redacted-esque company funding these things. So if you're talking about America, the military industrial complex doesn't exist.

Well, Eisenhower disagrees. Well, you know who else said words in 1963?

Governor Wallace, right? Who said, like, oh, black people can't go to school here. Well, that was also a problem. Yes. So, but... Look, just... Trump's standing up. I feel like Trump... Eisenhower... Eisenhower was right in 1970... 1963. However, by 1993, there was this event. It was called... Jurassic Park. The Last Supper. You're right. Jurassic Park. The Last Supper.

The last supper, essentially all of the top 15 defense contractors were brought into a room in the Pentagon and they were told, listen, we don't have enough money to pay you all.

So you need to start merging or you need to figure out how to cut costs and shut down. Is that how Grumman became Northrop Grumman? That's how Grumman became Northrop Grumman. That's how Lockheed became Lockheed Martin. That's how Raytheon bought up ATK, all these other companies. Oh, it's RTX now. It's not Raytheon. The military industrial complex ceased to be a problem after the 90s. It is. Honestly, so listen. Take a wild guess. How much money... This has gotten off the fucking...

the fucking rails in the last 10 minutes. I made a whole video about this. You do not want to contest me on this. All that shit I said about no monopolies, that was wrong. Undo it now. Take a wild guess. The top five defense... I fight this very intellectually. I kind of want to swap, man. No. Shit, all right.

Just in case they start swinging. The top five defense contractors. Take a while to guess how much money they made. Oh, okay. I appreciate it, brother. Thank you. Top five. Top five of defense contractors. Lockheed Martin, Arthur Brown, and RTX. Over what time period? Last year, in 2023. $600 billion. No, $200 billion. That's pretty low. 2023. Top five.

All of them? All of them. All five. The top five. Less than $20 billion. I think I remember reading Lockheed Martin makes like fucking, I want to say like $2 million a second. Dude, it's nuts. I want to say $13.6 billion. That was pretty cool. Less than $20 billion. $13.6 billion. Do you know how much money Procter & Gamble makes?

Made in 2023? Who's Procter & Gamble? Procter & Gamble. They make deodorant. They make everything. When they make money, brown people don't die. So... Directly. They can choke. Procter & Gamble's a gaming company. So Procter & Gamble made $14 billion last year. So Procter & Gamble makes more money than the top five defense companies. Now explain to me... Now, did they do that in 2011? No.

I did not grab the data for that, but... I wonder why. Wow, look. Where are these beaks? Yeah, let's look at beaks and valleys. I can tell you this. Do you personally... Well, maybe not you. Do you personally know anybody who works for a defense contractor? Yes. Okay. Well, you work in firearms. I'm a mulligan. I get it. Yeah. But for most of us, name a single person. Name a single person.

A single person who works. Steve. Okay. Steve doesn't care. Steve's an asshole. Name a single person that works your defense contract. Steve Miller. White name. So essentially what I'm trying to say is that companies like, I think it was Apple that made $97 billion in 2023. Yeah.

They don't even hold a camp. So if you're a congressman and you have Apple in your office and you have a guy from Lockheed Martin in your office and they both have a briefcase full of money, who are you inviting in first? Well, I can promise you, as somebody who's seen the inside of that game, which one shows up with the suitcase. One of them organically has the money. Yeah.

So, for the most part... Steve shows up a lot of the time. Steve's a fucking dick and he lives there. So when you compare it to, I think it's the S&P 500, I think that RTX is like number 55.

So basically the whole idea behind the military industrial complex is that the government is buying planes and tanks and ships that it can't really afford or we don't need, but we're buying them anyway. And we're doing it because they apparently expire. Well, the missiles expire. They do. The missiles expire. If you disagree, Dick Daniels will shoot you in the fucking face. But it's the truth. You want to sit down? No.

This F-22 is expired. We need to pick it up right now. Sorry, we're in the lightning round now. We're just fucking around. Just swap out. But the deal is that

When you look at these companies and how much money they make, they don't really make any money. At least compared to... Only $11 billion. At least compared to other companies. McDonald's, Procter & Gamble. Only the top companies on the planet. Do you own any stock in Lockheed Martin? Any of the top five defense contractors? I was one of the only congressmen that was ever going to take office without owning stock. No, because I'm going to go to heaven. Does anybody here at this table, does anybody

Anybody here own a defense contractor stock? No, because I'm going to heaven. No, you don't, because they don't make any money. Nick does. What do you own? They just made a lot of money last month. Does anybody here at the table own a 401k? Or have a 401k? There you go. The one who owns defense contracting stocks. So, essentially, you don't invest in defense contractors. I do. I work for a defense contractor. I work for the Texas Air Force. Nobody has any stock in Boeing.

I don't have any stock in Boeing. I might have an index fund. As soon as I found out that... Lockheed and Martin made a little chunk last month. As good as Apple? This is... Lockheed and Martin tripled their... Have you ever tried to sell a gun to the state or to a state organization or something like that? They wouldn't pass the background check. Alright, so look.

When I worked at the Texas Heron Med Lab, it's a company that uses AI-powered drones to... Yeah, that's a big fucking pilot. That's in six months. That was a month ago. A lot of stocks went up. But that was...

That was literally during the assassination of President Trump. That is what. No. When Biden. It was the assassination or when Biden. When the Iranian. No, Biden stepped down. That was one of those two things that we see in that giant. Oh, no. Excuse me. So let's have they have they released their profits for the quarter?

Because that's where you got to look at it. Well, last quarter. That's a question for Brandon. Because I know that you're very against the speech thing, targeting government-funded agents about speech. Just playing devil's advocate. Sure. Let's go for it. Let's explore. The...

Not generally. The line for freedom of speech is a call to action for violence against other people. So if state-funded actors are promoting violence against other people...

Does that change your thought process? In order for that to be true in regards to international diplomacy or different things overseas, you would have to also accept the fact that us calling for action within the UK riots would be grounds for the United Kingdom police to come extradite US citizens.

Just like they're talking about doing. Not US citizens. I'm talking about state-funded agents going to work for eight hours a day running a bot farm. Convincing Americans to try and do sketchy shit. What I think is that the... And this is what I think for most of social media, to be honest. And this is a very... It's a nuanced topic.

I don't think that any of the laws have been written or any of the rulings that have been made about the laws that are on the books have considered the ramifications behind what has happened in the last five, 10 years. That's fair. That's fair. I feel like there's no actual legal precedent behind it. We've not found the line. Do you agree with that?

We haven't found the line of when you can kinetically target someone. Because we're trying to figure that out now. That's... That wasn't... Macbeth is over here like, I can do it right now, actually. What do you think I was doing on the plane's Wi-Fi on the way here? That wasn't exactly what I said, but it's close. It's... Look, you know, look, I just find them...

I just find him, I don't do the weapon earring. And, you know... When you're a fine human, I know now. How deep are we in the... The fedora's getting more and more menacing. As time goes on.

You thought it was Ryan McBeth, this is El Chopper. Am I an Iron Dome target if I say it was 5.9 million? You boys ever played shuffleboard with a mine? Oh my god.

We're going to figure it out. I'm just bringing it up that it's a problem. And we need to start thinking about this because I guarantee you that the day China decides to invade Taiwan, it's probably going to be in 2027, three years before this happens.

i'll take all my uh amd stocks out yeah it's just today the day china decides to do that i guarantee you the next thing that's going to happen is china is going to wage an information warfare campaign over the internet and say to young impressionable college students

Go to the nearest naval base and glue yourself to the ship for China because Taiwan is being influenced by the capitalist, imperialist, colonialist United States. Every time someone says China, I think it was that video. Donald Trump, don't listen to China. China is asshole. China is asshole. I love that video, man. I don't think you're wrong. I really like... So, like, let me just... Like, I know I've kind of played... Let's kill people together. I'm getting there. I'm getting there. That's the opener of the fucking thing right there. Let's kill people together.

That's the shortest intro ever. A rainbow. Let's kill people together. They're like, man, that intro beat was only one second. The more you know.

I don't think you're wrong on that. I'm stone cold sober. Of course you are. As he pours more whiskey. I don't believe you. There are definitely ramifications that will come to this stuff, but I don't necessarily think you're wrong and that will be the best way. That is going to be an angle that they use to target. I mean, damn if you do, damn if you don't. We can't take it to court and figure out what's right and wrong until somebody at least does it once. That's...

Canada, we need you to do Canada things again. This scandal is what Nick's saying. Look, Canada and Poland are both itching for some war crimes, so I say we just put them in the chute, let them figure it the fuck out. Rangers lead the way for the last 25 years. Go ahead, we'll just slide you guys some missiles that are about to expire. Give you a f***ing bear and let you do it again.

i mean i i wonder what happened what happened to the other moabs that were expiring to be honest have you seen like the communist party that was marching through philadelphia and then the new communist party released a like a propaganda video to announce the new communist party they look so gay bro did you find out why they're there's been a communist party in america since like 1906 or some do you know why they had to launch the new communist party

You're never going to guess. Oh, God. This is going to be good. Give it a guess. Is it branding? Merchandising? Does it have to do with a child? In their mission statement, they said that they had to start the new communist party because the old communist party was too corrupt. No.

And then in their propaganda video, they've got like all this badass, like blue collar, like very Soviet era work together bullshit. They've got like a welder welding on a pipe and they've got whatever, whatever. And then they've got a fucking harvester, you know, like a combine, except it's white and it's got the new communist logo on the side. It's not harvesting anything. So even in their commercials where they don't have to have great food, you motherfuckers still can't even imagine feeding people. It's incredible.

I think it's great that also like fake communism in a capitalist country didn't even work. So they had to come up with new communism. Fuck. They didn't even have any power yet. I was watching it. I love watching debates. And I was watching this like super hardcore legitimate pro-communist guy just debate with somebody that read a book. And he brought up...

And he's like, I don't like communism because Mao Zedong killed 40 to 80 million people. And the dude's like, well, yeah, there was some death during the revolutionary phase. But, you know, after...

After the revolutionary phase, China actually saw the biggest rise in the standard of living. Thanks to Steve Jobs. Anywhere else in the world has... No, fuck that. The bread line got 80 million motherfuckers shorter, Brandon. It's obvious why nobody was hungry anymore. What do you mean?

We can just kill the week and be like, oh, fuck, and the problem's solved. Now everybody's happier. After the 10% culling, an American comes along like, hey, I need people to build an iPhone. You're like, yes, sir. We'll do it.

How do you feel about communists, Ryan? I don't like communists. I've caught on. Actually... There was that old saying, kill a commie for mommy. I'm old enough to remember this saying. I guess I'll slap another magazine right into my M16 because all I ever want to see are bodies bleeding bodies. You ever heard that cadence?

Pull a pin on the hand grenade. Should have seen the mess I made. Cause all I ever want to see are bodies bleeding bodies.

No. Why did you sing it like Frank Sinatra? Call for fire on the ice cream truck. I guess those kids were out of luck. But all I ever want to see are bodies bleeding bodies. Yeah, I would love to run with you. I get your dream. Those soldiers were so high. I want to leave the city. Got to get away. You want to sing the new Unsub intro song? If you have a fucking yacht next year, I'm going to know it was right beyond me.

There's a lot less bots on Twitter. I wonder what Ryan's doing. Yeah.

Just bought a jet? You never sang that cadence! No! I guess I'm a little older. This is back when we had, like, the whole, like, killin' commies thing, you know? There was that, um... The Twitter trolls disappear and the government's like, we don't have any missiles that are about to expire. Like, that's the process of how it would be when we're down. There was that, like, I wish all the ladies were pies on a shelf and I was the baker

I'd eat them all myself. I said, hey, Pasarefa. Hey, Barbariba. Left, right, left, right. Left, right, right. I feel like the military had more soul back then. All I had was killing the baby seals. Sergeant Johnson. I would have ran fucking all day long. I'd be like, this dude's really.

I get a repeat of C-130 rolled down the strip 19 times during a fucking run. Well, I never, I told you my watch story. I don't know if I should tell that story on here. Oh, yeah. I mean, you can if you want to. Actually, let's do it. Wait, hold. We'll do it on the after show. Brandon, you want to? I got this one. I got this one. George's on the after show where Eli Double Tap is going to butt chug an entire bottle of calamine lotion. With all that on the rim.

We're getting some old paper. I'm sorry. Go ahead. That's fine. You just got to close out everyone's names too. You're right. We've got Eli Double Tap, Nick the Fat Electrician, Ryan McBath, myself, and Habitual Line Crosser. We will see you at the after show. First, where do we find you, you beautiful humans?

Oh, you can find me at, what am I, Ryan McBeth Programming at YouTube or TheRealRyanMcBeth on Instagram or RyanMcBeth.substack.com. And if you're a bad guy, see you soon. McBeth! Read me a sign! Jesus! By the twitching of my thumb, something wicked is what comes to my head! Jesus!

HabitualWineCrosser.com. I can't beat that. I like missiles. That's too strong. I like missiles. I love you. See you on the after show. Patreon. Bye.

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