156 - Habitually Fat & Angry ft. The Fat Electrician AngryCops & Habitual Linecrosser | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 156
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I'm gonna make you feel guilty! So you hear a doctor who's holding your in his hand ask for a smaller scalpel. I'm poor and Mexican. You yell at overpaid teenagers and grown men and pretend like you're hard. You're not big enough and there's not enough of you. I need a punchline.

Hey everyone, it is the last week of the Autism Awareness Month and holy crap, we could stop now and we changed the lives of so many kiddos and these nonprofits. So thank you first off for that, you amazing humans. You guys are going to be utterly shocked with how much love and support you have all given for this amazing cause and we are so stoked to show the final number.

But I want this last week to just be this giant push. It is the Spectrum Gun Trip, the TISM Touch, and the Full Metal Spectrum. It is the last week to pick those shirts up. So go grab one. Go support an awesome cause. Again, it's all going to a nonprofit. We are taking $0 from this. Y'all are amazing. You're wonderful people. You are loved. You are cared for. And thank you for this amazing community that you have all built and created.

We get to be part of it. Welcome to the new number one trending episode. Habitually Fat and Angry. Oh, yes. That's a title. That is a title. That is a really good title. I'm so excited for this one. Oh, yeah, Nick, you want to? Well, three. Hold on. I got to get a little bit. I'm doing a double here. Ready? Got it. Three, two, one. It's been hours since I drank.

I still just can't get behind white claws man, just, just, I mean they're just, they're okay. You can't stand behind them, you stand in front of them brother. Okay? You riding up, will you take the bull for the white car, or take the bull for you man? There's no laws with the claws. Fucking Christ.

Nick, fucking start this bee off. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Unsubscribed Podcast. I'm joined here today by my co-host, Mr. Eli DoubleFap, my dear friend, Ethan, Mr. Habitual Linecrosser, and my bestest friend, Mr. Angry Cops, Richard High. We both have sunburns. And our boy, Fat Electrician. I'm Nick. I work here. Fuck off. Yeah.

I like the friendship. It's like my business, just business partner, friend, my best friend. No, he's, I know. That's what I'm saying. I'm going down this way. My best friend. We're besties. Tell you about my best friend. Fuck this guy. We get drunk together. Sorry. So we've had, it's been, it's been a time. Nick, it's 10, 1054 in the morning. It's fine.

It's like we're tailgating. We're good. Yeah. I've never done that. It's like we're getting ready for a Bills game. We're going to lose at 1 o'clock in the afternoon, but we're going to be too drunk to care. Losing's never been so fun.

How are you doing? You have fun at range day? I did. I had a blast at range day. I, uh, you know what? Because everyone who watches these videos is immediately like they notice every last little detail. Like before you guys said you were sunburned, I guarantee someone watching is like they're sunburned, but they're going to notice this mark on my neck. And I assure you, no, it was not Nick giving me a hickey. It was much cooler than that. It was me shouldering in a suppressed M 60 as a lefty. And it was just throwing brass at my neck.

Anyone that's done like drills where you're firing drills and you're standing next to your buddy, we would go home with just burn marks on our necks because it'd be it fling into the flak jackets and we'd be like, dude, the

Fuck! Fuck! You tossing that shit out, everyone's just burnt. I found a couple of them in the little chest rig that I was wearing. I was like, I was getting some fucking lunch and there was like brass in there. I was like, oh, that's, that's okay, fucking, all right, that was in there. I failed my first SWAT tryout because we were all in line and we're like shooting. You have to do it at like a certain speed. You know, you only have a certain amount of time to fire off a certain number of rounds. And you have to remember how many rounds you fired off and what you've got left.

and I'm sitting there shooting and the guy, buddy next to me just flew hot brass down my neck. I was like, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh. And I was like, how many bolts did I shoot? Oh no. Oh no. And I went, I think I have one more. Pow. Lockback. No, no. Nobody else has a lockback. They're like, Rich, you threw the round when you got the, uh, the brass down your neck and then he shot an extra one there. So, um, you failed by like one point. And I was like, Oh,

I'm never going to be cool. How long is that like qualification process for SWAT or what? Like how much time did that cost you? Well, the next time they did SWAT trials was four years later. Oh my God. And then I didn't do it. I was like, I had too much going on. I had to do, you know, this weird podcast that my friend was starting up. It has since grown significantly. And first time I heard that. So...

Yeah, not this one. No, it's actually about turning roadkill into five-star delicious meals. I really thought you were going to be like Joe Rogan. Maybe you've heard of him. Me and the talking thumb. We're very close. You got this. God, I'm just so pissed. How do you kick an extra round off?

No, so like I went to shoot the brass hit my neck and I was like, ah, and I, and I, and I hit the round and then I stopped and I just like kind of, you know, gain control of myself again. So that round was on paper, but off target.

And then I, that was it. Like, I was like, okay, you can't shoot anymore. But I lost track of the number of bolts that I fired. And they're like, hey, this iteration of fire is five rounds and five seconds at 25 meters. And so, you know, I'm like sitting there. I'm like, should I shoot four or five? Oh, no. Oh, shit. Well, I don't want to. I mean, if you're going to fail, I'd rather be an extra bullet than not taking the shot and then being like, why don't you take that shot, Rich? Like, oh. So I fired and I went to lock back.

Everybody else was not at lock back. And because the next iteration of fire was, you know, fire five rounds. You fire the first one and then emergency magazine change. And they were just like, I was like, pow, whack. And I was like, oh, no. And the SWAT instructor behind me is just like, well, Rich, you're already unloaded. Why don't you just go ahead and holster and walk to the back of the range? Because you failed. And I was like, damn it. Damn it. Shit. Fuck. Shit.

So, yeah, no special treatment, you know? Not even for an internet celebrity. Have you seen my YouTube plaque? Yeah, you're like, but this? And they're like, we don't care. They're like, Rich, you're really annoying. None of us like your shit. We're actually really happy that you failed. But a show, a hot show went down. My shirt. Yeah, you're joining SWAT. You're

You're going to get shot at. Of all the ways to go out. I didn't shoot an old lady. I just missed the guy by that much. And then I fired an extra round to make sure he was down because I missed him by that much. That makes sense to me. Yeah. They were like, no, not here. It's America. We don't run out of bullets. What are you talking about? I know. I have more. Like, it's fine. They're in my pocket. I can just put them in.

Oh, man. And then you guys, how late did you stay out? I only stayed out until like 9.30. I'm an old person, man. I'm just... Yeah. My guy. Nick? Yeah. I get a text at like 2.40. You guys going to be up at 10? You're a bad old man. I saw you like you responded to something in the group chat that we have. And I was like, why is Eli up? He left the bar four hours ago. I was like...

Because I took a nap right before going to the bar. So I was like, shit. I was like in and out of sleep. Woke up, checked my phone. Okay. I was like, yeah.

And then got a text from you. Yeah, go to bed, old man. I'm still at the bar, and I'm worried about you being the one ready for the podcast in the morning. Come on. I was up. I did it. You did it. We're here. We're here. I can't tell you how many times we've been like, we're going to do one more podcast right before you go on your flight. This is the first time it's ever happened. This is...

We're not doing mimosas right now with the boys. That's true. Yeah, everybody else is getting like blitzed at brunch right now. Casey from... Neistat? No, from our brunch location. Yeah. He stayed up and closed the bar down with us. Did Casey go hard? Oh, yeah. You know our server? Oh, yeah. Yeah, Casey was there. Casey would not shut the fuck up. Oh, my God. He got bit by the gab bug and it latched. Okay.

because he was just like, Rich, I was like, oh, that's cool, man. And then somebody else would talk to me and I'd be like, so, oh, you want to talk to me too? That's nice. Let's have a go. And I was looking over every couple minutes. He's like, hey, Richard, how are you? You're still talking to me. I'm like, bro, I haven't paid attention to you for two minutes. Like, I'm literally talking to this person right here. And you're just like, hey, bro, you're zooted. Dude, he's cool. I love him. But like, he's kind of got a raspy voice normally. Yeah.

Probably three in the morning. He sounded like fucking boom how we're like I knew some of those words I Gotta watch dune - I know it's only been in theaters for like a week But I really want to watch it cuz I saw the first one and I'll be honest with you like so for me I because I'm half fucking deaf We watched it at home

It must be built for theaters or something because I had to sit there with the remote and they would be talking and I'd have to turn it up because I couldn't hear a fucking word they were saying. And then like a scene would change and they'd hit the music and like blow my fucking speakers. So I'd have to turn it back down like the music and the voices were just so far apart from each other. I was like, I can't do this, man. My grandparents used to have a headset for the television. So you need that. You don't mean to show the VCR. Yeah.

Get me a fucking life alert and fuck you. You had to hit input in order to switch to the VCR. Oh, God. Right? Yeah. There's like two remotes and they get lost. They're like, why isn't the TV turning on the internet? The greatest generation ever can't figure out how to turn from cable to VCR to DVD. Oh, God. I don't know how to install it. It's literally color coded. It's red, white, yellow, power.

Yeah, Grandpa. Just like the 40s. The whites stay together, the reds stay together, the yellows stay together. You know what I mean? Your wife closed her eyes and read it right to me. Oh, man. Your wife was like, oh, shit. You know what I said? I want to talk to you. I want to talk to you.

something when you hear stuff like that it's just so out of the i was at um reynolds army health clinic on fort still and there was this old timer he's in like his fucking 90s right like he's just ancient and i'm sitting there i'm in uniform we're on a federal installation this just reminded me of this and i was getting some meds and this dude sitting next to me and his wife uh she had gone back there she you know i had a little walker or whatever she's you know between the ages of 80 and death she's ancient and um

That's a spectrum. Yeah, that's a spectrum. So he starts talking to me about, you know, what he used to do. And I was like, oh, so, you know, when were you? And he goes, I was here on Fort Sill back before they ruined it. And I was like, what do you mean they ruined it? He goes, they used to keep them colored on the far side. And I'm just like, I have no idea what to do. I'm like, do I hit this man? You'll kill him. I'm like, fuck. Thank you for your service. Yeah.

I just sat there like smiled and nodded. I appreciated it. It was the weirdest shit, man. He just slowly gets close to you and just goes, Oh, I'm mad. You're like, oh, I feel weird. I feel weird. You have to grab the hand just creeping on you. You're like,

He sees like an SS tattoo on the inside of his finger. Oh, dude, did you guys see the 20th group? Oh, yeah. There's an investigation now. They just opened one. What the fuck? Listen, I get it. They had cool uniforms. We can't use that shit anymore, man. What happened? A dog?

SF guy at a 20th group. Hey, you know the... They had the high-speed fucking helmets. Yeah. The ones we have. And it's got the Velcro on the back. He had a fucking patch, and it's a palm tree with a skull. Well, that logo is the...

The logo of Rommel's guys in North Africa from World War II. Did he know it? Well, it was the jazz skull. He does now. He does now. It was like the Nazi skull. Yeah. Oh, are we the baddies? Yes, exactly. Are we the baddies? We have skulls and crossbones and we keep killing all of these innocent people. Are we the baddies? I don't get the reference on me.

Oh, we'll show you. It's a good show. It's a really good skit. It's like Germans during World War II recognizing it. He's like looking at their uniforms. He's like, hold on. Are we the baddies? Because it's like SS, the crossbows, the skulls.

White. It's a really good beat. But yeah, 20th Group posted it on their like Facebook account, right? Yeah. Oh God. So it's a photo of two SF guys. One SF guy, like you said. I think it was like a recruiting photo. It was like join the best or something like that. And they happen to be two whites. Oh no. Oh shit.

Something about purity in the 20th Special Forces Group. On the plus side, at least I'll stop talking about the commercial with the girl that had two dads. So at least they got something new to bitch about out there. It wasn't a skull. It was a straight up swastika and a palm tree. Okay. Well, that was the original patch of Rommel. But the patch or that was the original. So Rommel's original logo was a bent black palm tree with a swastika in the center on the trunk.

What the guy was wearing was the same bent black palm tree, yes, and it had the skull and crossbones on it that were the synonymous...

With the Nazi party. Imagine he's just first group. He's like, man, I really like, man, I'm from Hawaii and love palm trees. But if we put a skull, it'd look really cool. But he made it himself. He's proud. Or he just Googled palm trees. He's like, oh, that's really dope. Put it on his head. And now he's like, he wanted to make a morale patch. And then it's just like accidentally, you know, that.

He's like, I need a skull and crossbones. Like, oh, this one looks really cool and oddly familiar. You think it was like on a higher shelf? Like when he grabbed it? Oh, my fucking God. Jesus Christ. How high was it? 45 degree angle shelf? Oh, my God. Not up here. Not up here. Not up here. That's too high. That's too low.

Speaking of that, she's probably going to get mad that I tell this. So my wife, she recently had an infection on her right arm. And so she didn't like the blankets would rub against it while she was sleeping. So she'd sleep with her hand outside the blankets and put on a sock on her hand because a glove went down too far and would hit her infection. And I came in one day and I almost pissed a fucking kidney laughing because I look over and she's laying in the bed doing like the full on 45 degrees.

I was just like, yeah, it was the weirdest shit. Oh, man. Yeah. I thought you were going to say you made her masturbate you while she was unconscious. No. What the fuck? You're like, let me see that mitten hand, baby. Let me see that mitten hand. Fucking Christ. She's sleeping from the oxycodones. She can't feel it, but I can. This is love. This is love. What happens in your house? Don't you hate it when your wife falls asleep with your cum sock on your head?

It's stuck to the wall growing mushrooms. Is that the cum sock? Yeah, you heard it.

That's what it was used for. Was it YouTube? Of course. It was your first video here. That's what it was. It was their first time on Unsubscribed, and they did the sock thing with the infection. And then they left it. Do the sock thing. They did the sock thing with the infection. And they left the cum sock against the wall, and then that's what King Trout found. Guilty as charged. There's no bullets in the gun, so it couldn't be me. I got the old...

You still put out the sticky stuff, though, do you? You don't just put out powders. Not why. We don't tell people that. We know how decks work. I've been working with mine for 36 years. I'm pretty sure I know it'll go off.

How do you pee? Well... Isn't the pee stored there? Yeah, it's all stored in there. Pee's stored in the balls. Everyone knows that. That's where pee's stored. Bro. I don't know what you guys are talking about. I want to go to Germany and get their version of a vasectomy. It's way cooler. America cuts it and cauterizes both ends. Yeah. Germany has... It looks like a fucking jelly... They cut it, they loop it, and...

I thought they cut it and cauterize it. They cut it. Well, my guy cut it, knotted it, and cauterized it. So, like, there's... And there's, like, a gap there now. Like, there's no growing back. Are you saying that Germany is better at claiming of the genetic materials from young men who voluntarily sterilize themselves? Oh, yeah, tell me more. Rich has no offender superpowers. He can make anything racist. It's true. He's off-lander.

I'm going to make you feel guilty. He just starts rallies, a bunch of different rallies. Dude, I just had a phone call with a sponsor, a potential sponsor. And they're located in Israel. And they had some Palestinian jokes that they were not afraid of saying to me over the Zoom call. And I was like, wow, tell me how you really feel, boys. When I see riches, I go, whoa.

Oh, yeah. Every time G-Van has to edit one of these, he's like, Rich, fuck. Rich just doubled, all right? They're like, we like your friends on their gun channel. I don't know how to do a Jewish accent. If you like your friends in the gun channel, there you go. There we go. It's very nice. We have all the guns here, too. The Palestinians don't like it. Hey, what are you doing? Fuck it. And I was like, whoa, wait. I don't know how to do this accent. Nails accent. I know. It's perfect. That's an American New York, like, you know, sitting joke. That's like Mel Brooks to a T, and now I need to learn that. Fuck.

It's not fair. It's not fair where he lives. He just holds his ear to the ground to hear it. Yeah, he's like, what the X is that? They're below us. It's like Trevor's, but Jews.

I just pictured Get away! No! I'm not kosher! Oh man, this is If my career wasn't over already, it fucking is now. I'm not kosher, for sure.

They're pounding the thing. There's just a Jewish guy just comes up from his round. Whoa. You have to latch on and ride. If Dune was real, there'd be just a thousand Texans out there. I'm going to ride with you. We're going to do a roar of rodeo today.

If Dune was real, Texas would be located in the Middle East. That's for a damn future. See, that's how we solve racism. We have Jewish Dune and Texans riding on the back of Jews. Through the sand, everybody gets along. Everybody's high on spice. It's a desert, so the Arabs love it. We're bringing Christianity, Judaism, and Islam all together.

Sand dunes. Jew riders. We're going... Ryan, Ryan. It is the final test. It's the ancient Jew. It's the biggest Jew in the... I can hear him coming. It's hot out here. Get ready. Why is there so much sand in all the rivers? Oh, my God. There's an Arab woman in the background. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

There's nothing I can do the rest of this podcast to top that. I'm glad you're still active, dude. Fuck, man. I'm going to get back. This thing's going to air as the general wants to speak to you. Like, fuck. Well, I'm just going to walk in. You just start needing paperwork. I'm so sorry. The funny part is you might have done the funniest shit I've ever seen. It really was. Here's a coin. He just goes to shake the coin. You're doing great.

Dude, before we jump back on your German story of the German balls. I have met some high-ranking people in the military, and every time they retire, they'll message me and be like, dude, I love your stuff. And I'm like, why didn't you message me when you were still in? You know what's trouble I get in? You could have my back in public and peel off me the fuck alone. You're a really nice sergeant major. Tell them right now. Tell them. No, they're nice people. I can't wait to do a video on Rich.

That's going to be hilarious. What do you mean? You can't do a video on me. We're talking about the most retarded general sergeant in the world who became a social media icon and then was jailed. Oh, dude, I'm telling all the stories. I'm telling every donut operator breakdown. I'm telling you fucking up SWAT. All of it. The ballad. It's going to be fantastic. Oh, man, it'll be so good.

So anyway, what happened with your German Albreich privileges? It looks like a little jelly belly and it opens like a clamshell and they just cut your nut sack open and it clamps around the vas deferen and it's got a little tiny toggle switch on it and it crimps it off and then you can unswitch it and it just opens them up.

So you can like literally like we're firing blanks or we're going hot. Anytime. Is it like a silencer? Like you just go down and reach it and you click the switch and you're like, wait, there's an actual switch. You can switch. Yes. Can we attach it to a clapper? The user can literally grab your nutsack, stretch it out like a fucking bat wing and just fucking safe. Wait, hold on. What did it sound like again? And that's the sound of pregnancy, kids.

It's awesome. Forget if it's off or on. And you're like, fuck, I need an x-ray now to figure out which position the switch is in. Which is stupid. That's like one of those sensory toys. I just need to be like, click, click, click. All day. Oh my gosh. Click, click, click. And then I'm like, wait. What position is it in? Exactly. I'm like, uh-oh. Is that on or off? Click, click, click.

Then you get to play baby roulette. That's what you get to fucking do. Dangerous game. That's yeah. Why don't we do it like that? That's makes way more sense. Said they're American. We're just like, as you said, I'm telling you when I went in there, so I was nervous as shit. Cause you're awake for the whole procedure, but I have very low tolerance for narcotics. So I was like, Hey, can you guys, I'm in stirrups. Like I'm fucking having, you know, a child, um,

And there's a doctor between my legs. He's got a nurse with him. And I'm like, it's cold in here. Don't look at it. It's kind of chilly. But anyways, and I was like, hey, can you give me something to take the edge off? I'm a little bit nervous. And they pumped me full of something. And I was in fucking la-la land. Like, I love making jokes. When I rolled out, I think I called my wife a penis pincushion. It was great. I was like, I can put it anywhere now. Nothing will happen. You can always put it anywhere. You don't have a choice. I went from, like, out of it to straight, like,

i i snapped out of it immediately because you have no idea how fragile your masculinity is until you hear a doctor who's holding your nuts in his hand ask for a smaller scalpel

I snapped right out of it. What? I don't remember any part of the procedure, but I remember that vividly. Don't worry, buddy. It's not about the beans. It's about the frank. Well, I don't got that either. Oh, it may not be long, but at least it's then. I hope you're always rising to the positive. I'm going to give you PTSD with a number two pencil, baby. At least you'll never hurt your wife. I can't. I can't do it. Death by a thousand cuts.

I don't like the big ones. They hurt. Oh, fuck. That's right. This is an Adam and Eve dot com ad.

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at adamandeve.com. Babe, let's go ahead. Oh yeah, Rich, you fucking, also just shout out to you for crushing the live shows, dog. If you didn't go see the live shows, I don't even think you're a fan. You didn't see his ass or his balls because the live shows didn't. Nobody saw my balls. I talked to them all up front and I may have mooned a crowd. Maybe. Right out of the gate. Right out of the gate. And I didn't know until after the show because in the picture I'm like, ah.

Ah, looking at the audience. You look like you're presenting me. Like it was a plan. I'm standing up on a chair, mooning the crowd, and you're there just in front of me. You can't see me. I'm in the peripherals. And you're like, hey, here he is. Afterwards, I mooned the crowd. When? And then the pictures came up. It was like...

Yep, did not even know you were doing that. That explains a lot. Great did a lot of legwork for I did Brandon and Cody and me here. He's Oh We're all kind of nervous and it's like oh shit this is the first show and

And then we go up, like people are cheering and we're like, we, we just sit down rich. First thing he does hops on a chair, shows his ass to the fucking crowd. It's like, Oh,

well, I can't fuck this up now because he's already done it. It can only go uphill from here for me. So I got rid of all the stress. It was awesome. Two things were going to happen. I planned on it. I was either going to fall intentionally and create a scene and moon everybody and make like a big slapstick moment. I like you had two options. I had two options. Ass is out. Of course. Hashtag ass out.

Ass out for unsub? Ass out for unsub. There's another t-shirt. There you go. And the other one was, if we get out there and they're not loud enough, I'm just going to jump up on a chair and moon them real quick. Because it was St. Patrick's Day, and I was wearing a kilt. With no underwear. As traditional, yes. And so as I was walking up, I was like, if you trip and you don't cup your junk right, you're going to flash them some dick. And that is a little too far.

So there's children in the audience. I think it was like a 13-year-old. I think somebody brought a baby. Oh, Jesus. And I was like... That's a great thing. Come on, let's go see these fucking degenerates. We got pictures with them. We signed them. You signed the baby? Yeah. Billiam. Young Billiam. Fucking Christ. I need to be a part of this. I'm going to the next one whether I'm on it or just in the fucking crowd. That one was Houston. Yeah, Houston is where we signed the baby. And then Dallas is when I think it was like super refined at that point. It took like four...

The first one, if you had fun in San Antonio, like nailed it. You covered down so, so hard. It was awesome to see everyone. And then everyone got like relaxed. It was just, everyone's laughing. The audience cheers that everything, which is amazing.

I wish Cody was here because I have a bone to pick with him for how Dallas went. I knew this was coming. Yeah. Yeah, you knew it was coming. Whoa, okay. Right when he did it, I went, yes, fuck this. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. What happened? You requested beforehand. I told him, do it this way because, okay. I tried, trust me, I tried. I was like, who do we have? And he's like, shit, you didn't do shit. What the fuck did I miss? I was like, oh.

No, okay. I tried. I fucking tried. So here's the deal, right? If you're doing a live show and you have a headliner, let's say it's a normal comedy act. You get a headliner, right? You've got some of the guys that started off. They get progressively funny, progressively more well-known, and then you have the head guy that's the headliner at the end, and everybody's excited. So if you're introducing people like we did, like Donut did, to a panel, you would go with like the –

I don't want to say lower ranking person, but the person that's less known and then crescendo up to the person that's most well-known because what you don't want to happen is you don't want somebody to be like, Oh, here's Jesus. Yay. And then you're like, Oh, and here's Jerry from the seven 11. And people are like, Oh,

So I tell you, I told you, and I know you heard me. We told Cody how to start the fucking episode. He fucked up high everyone four times. That's how he starts the show for 150 fucking episodes. And then that, he was like, we had today. Hold on, hold on, hold on. So the person that, so when we go to Dallas, the two people that were joining the unsubscribed podcast were myself and Meat Canyon. Meat Canyon, who has...

- 34 employees? - Yeah, he's got two channels with like 10 million people on it. He is a piece of pop culture because of the Bugs Bunny double wide surprise. Like people everywhere know him or they know of his work. So I'm like, hey guys, call me out and then as you know, for the piece de resistance, the last person coming out as a super surprise, call out Meat Canyon and he'll get a roaring applause and the crowd will go up, you know, like a nice bell curve, it's gonna go up.

And sure as I'm behind the curtain with meat Canyon with Hunter and donut goes, well, yeah, we've got a couple of guys meet Canyon. What?

And me and Kenny goes, ho, ho, ho. Fucker. Fucker. Because, of course, the crowd's like, holy shit. And I'm sitting there because as a professional, I'm like, you fucked me, you asshole. And as a friend, I'm like, that's funny as shit because you fucked me, you asshole. I was dying. I was dying. And then Cody gave it a pause. That's when I was like, ah!

angry. I was like, Cody's gonna like one walk out, sit down and then it would have died. And then like, and anger comes. It was like, blah, blah, blah, blah. So I was like, I thought it was funny. I was pissed off and happy at the same time. It was brilliant. I loved it. It's like trolling your friends. This is exactly it. And so I was like, that's, that's, that's, I'm not just going to go sit down after that. I'm going to, I'm going to own the stage. So I walk in front of everybody just

flexing and staring staring down the crowd and being like I can't hear you you know and Hulk Hogan pumping him up because I'm like I'm not gonna go out to a yeah oh the fucking dickhead you hammed it up so good that you came I had to ham it up because you laid across the stage you're like yeah Christ you're a performer it's impressive yeah I know I know I just turned it on that was like for San Antonio your first show I was like and Rich

Like, that is the first person we're asking to do any of this. I was like, that dude will carry it. And then we did Chris and Wes because they're, like, they're entertainers. They're magicians. Stage. Stage and everything, yeah. And they do crowd interaction because, like...

Watching how you interacted with the Offenders Power also a bit, we kept the entire time because it was fucking amazing. It was a great bit. That's how we close out each show, but it was also why we started doing more crowd interaction throughout the shows. It was like, okay, Richard's always coming with us no matter what. I was shitting on people in the crowd. Oh, I was shitting on people in the crowd. And they'd be like,

I'm like, what's your superpower? And they'd be like, I want to, I raised my temperature two degrees. And I was like, okay, so you got COVID. That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard. Did you ever raise your hand again? And then I would go over to the next person and I'd be like, I know what your power is to have a better haircut. Get out of here. And then I'd go to the next one. Dude, some guy had a horrible bowl cut. I don't know. There was a blind Asian woman that was like, I'll take care of you. Butchered his hair. Yeah.

The PX haircut. Oh, he's so good. There was a girl that had some sort of respiratory issue because she was hooked up to oxygen. And I came over to her husband and I was like, wow, really took her breath away, huh? I mean, I was cracking jokes about her not being able to breathe. And just, yeah, it was fun. That's what you all missed out on. It was fun.

oh, so dialed in at the end. I had a blast. All the guys got addicted to it too. It was, oh, this is, oh, then Dallas afterwards, everyone's hugging to like, we got to do more. We got to fucking do more. My, my, my,

My phrase for like before San Antonio, before the first show, while everybody's like, man, I'm kind of nervous. And I, we all of this goes well, all right, I think we're ready. And I'm just sitting there like pacing around like shittery. I'm like, I'm jazzed. I'm so jazzed right now. And everybody, you would be like, how you doing? I'm like, I'm jazzed. I'm jazzed.

I was like, we're good. He was, he would be, I was like, what are you going to do before? And he's like, I'm going to just walk and work the crowd before for like an hour and a half. They're getting like a three hour set. Cause the rich is like walking around. How are you doing? I was like, okay, my boy's good. This is a good choice. Yeah. I get turned on by crowd work. Ooh.

Dude, you fucking slayed. It was really. You missed out. If you didn't show up, you really missed out. You guys do Dallas again. Dallas is like three hours away from me. I'll come on down there and check it out. Oh, we're definitely doing that. And then Nick got in the flow of just like, today we're talking about... Yeah, I got better at doing live history. That was rough at first. Well, because it's weird because they cheer at every punchline and then I start doing history and everybody's like quiet and I'm like, oh, fuck, they hate it. I need a punchline. But they're like...

Yeah. Yeah. It's what every high school teacher would cream to have. Everybody just, just listening. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Stop fucking talking. Tell me more about Ching Chong. What was his name? Ching Lee. Ching Lee. Ching Lee. More racist. He's a white guy. He's a white guy. And that's okay.

That's fine. Before I even knew anything about it, he was like, yeah, Chang Li. And I was like, you're doing Chinese history now? That was the first thing that popped in my fucking head. Yeah, just weeb from Kentucky. The white dude that lived in a different time. His nicknames were slightly altered. He lived in the VCR times. What's the offset for your new superpower of being able to make anything racist? Ooh, ooh, ooh.

What is the offset? I mean, that of itself is an offensive superpower. Like, I can turn everything. Well, basically, all I am is woke. Really, honestly. All I am is Vice News. That's really all I am. Cheeseburgers and how they promote white supremacy. That's pretty much every Vice article. He always has a Karen haircut with purple. I need to speak to your manager. What were these people of color set before me?

holy fuck they should have been because of my privilege this is wonderful i don't know how to feel like i'm just i'm in awe right now like wow this is fucking you're like oh god fuck i'm having fun right now but i know i'm gonna be standing on someone's carpet at the position of attention it was funny like i don't care who you are it was fucking hilarious they were good jokes yeah they were solid i'll tell you exactly what's gonna happen you're gonna have a uh you're you're oh five and he's gonna be like okay hey hey so listen here's the deal uh

All right. You didn't say anything wrong. Okay. Okay. But you got to be careful with the company that you keep. I understand you're in a room. There's a lot of moving parts. That one. Holy shit. Well, I mean, I don't really have an O five cause I work at a, an NCO only place. So they might just find it funny.

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Oh, fuck. What did you find out about planes? Who had the coolest planes? So I was... Well, yesterday at Rangedale, I was walking around asking everybody, like, what is your favorite aircraft? And shout out to my buddy Rich here because we definitely fucked that up because we both thought that a Chinook was a UH. I looked it up. It's a CH. Because I'm retarded. Yeah, we're both dumb. It's all right. That's why I never made it to college school. The Chinook, it's a staple in the Army. Like, it's... I mean, that thing, it does what it needs to do. You can...

Can pull howitzers with it. You can drop MREs on people or whatever. You can do a lot of shit with it. Shut up. I'm making an MREs on forehead shirt. That cut's going to be hilarious. It's going to be like the fucked up TV. 12 minutes occurred. You're not going to see it. You had the, Oh, what was the one that the propeller broke? The sound barrier, the thunder screech. Um,

And then the, what is it? Grandpa Gaming. He's fucking, he's so nice, man. I love that guy. He's such a cool dude. He had the F-101 Voodoo, which I've never even fucking heard of. So I need to dig into that one. That's how you know he's old. But a lot of people went with like the 737 and the 787 were just like popping jokes about different things.

falling out of like, like doors falling off and fucking, you don't know if it's going to land or it's going to make it there all the way. Like I think someone did the 737 super, the one that was having all the, the flight issues and was just nosediving for a couple of years and they had to like park them. So a lot of civilian airliner, but yeah, the, you were the only one that had like a real, uh,

You and fucking grandpa gaming we're just way out there and I know I got to do homework on your fucking aircraft because I gotta find a picture of it put it on there and it's fucking funny the Thunder screech. Oh is the one you did the video on? Yeah What is the Thunder in the Cold War they tried to have a prop driven plane that could break the sound barrier That's whole so it's like it's spent obviously it's been super fucking fast. They spend

it hit it like just hit the sweet spot where when it was like accelerating the propellers because the tips are traveling further than the base the tips would break the sound barrier but then it would be pulled out of the sound barrier by the rest of the blade that wasn't breaking the sound barrier so it was constantly going in and out in and out in and out in and out loudest fucking thing it was 900 sonic booms per second that it was generating you could hear it for 30 miles like it was like

It was hearing damage from 30 miles away. That's fucking nuts. Like, there were towns 50 miles away complaining to the government. Like, what the fuck are you guys doing? Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Boo! They got... Just flying through the air. Test pilots, period, are fucking crazy. But the ones during the Cold War are fucking insane, right? They got two test pilots to fly this thing. The first guy got in, flew it once.

Got out and told the chain of command, you're not big enough and there's not enough of you to get me back in that fucking plane. Fire me. Refused to do it. The fucking ground crew almost had a casualty. Like one dude had to get hospitalized just from the concussions.

that this thing was given off when they started it. Not service-related. No, not at all. 10% maybe. Oh, what's that? It's a secret... Oh, it's a secret plane that you were trying to... Right. Okay.

Speaking of fucking hearing loss, man, I don't understand it because the army and the VA, I guess, just changed it where hearing loss is no longer fucking counted. And when I went to do like my hearing after Afghanistan, they're like, well, didn't you get issued the ear pro? And I was like, yeah, like I couldn't be like timeout Taliban. I got to protect my fucking hearing. You like you return fire, get covered. Then you're like, I can't hear shit anyways.

But yeah, no, I was, so I don't understand why it's not service connected. It drives me insane. They just don't pay because it was expensive. But did you hear, did you hear you'll like this? Cause the sonic boom, they've designed an aircraft. The, I think it was skunk works. Might've been skunk works. Probably has designed an aircraft. Looks like a dart and it goes supersonic goes past the sound barrier without creating a sonic boom.

Just came out. How can you do that? I have no fucking idea. I love science magic. These are the same guys that are designing, it's in theory right now, a supersonic underwater fucking... Supersonic underwater? Underwater drone using a process called super cavitation where they create an air pocket in front of it and it fucking goes through the water at supersonic speed. Super cavitation. I've actually heard of that, but not with bullets and fired rounds. Not...

Yeah, not a ship. The two problems they run into with it is one, you can't fucking turn. And number two, they don't make a propeller fast enough to do that. So it has to be rocket powered underwater because rockets create their own air and burn their own air. That's why rocket motors work in outer space. We could do that. So like, God bless America. We're just like, let me see, we've done fucking knife missile. Now we can break the sound barrier without making a sonic boom. Underwater supersonic drone. Do you want to do that? What's a knife missile? Knife missile is the shredder flying against you?

No. Well, maybe, maybe. So refresh my memory. Let me tell you a story. Did you finish your story with the sonic boom? Oh, yeah. You said one guy got injured with the second guy. He flew it like 12 times or some shit and had to crash land it like nine fucking times. Intentionally. He's like, I'm going to do this for Jerry. He quit. I shouldn't be in this thing. Yeah. Eventually they ditched it. I still think they should like bring it back and just have somebody fucking fly it around just to be annoyed the enemy.

Just fly over a third world country just real low. That's a really good show of force. You know, you just go exploding in the air, but staying together. The Taliban just thinks that, you know, Allah is coming. And right back to the VCR. Here we go. That's just their name for God. It's not racist. No.

I'm using their words. If you want to go down a funny rabbit hole, look up. Because you know like whenever they drop a bomb or whenever they get an air-to-air kill or whatever, they put like a little sticker by their cockpit where they get in. Look up some of the funnier versions of the stickers on there because there's like legit fighter jet pilots and shit that have cows on their shit. Like there's dudes that have confirmed kills on like cows because they were flying low and like went, broke the sound barrier and it fell.

He just murked a cow. And they're like, yep, but not on the... There's one guy that has a Winnebago because it fucking... Supersonic boom went...

Like some Winnebago was on a road they were not supposed to be on on a military base. And this guy's like, fuck it. Went super slow. Broke the sound barrier right over the top. Just ripped the fucking Winnebago in half. That's nuts. That's fucking nuts. There's all kinds of funny shit. Speaking of sound, I don't know why my brain put this to memory. I don't even know how you would ever do this. But apparently, according to theoretical physicists, if you create something that is 1100 decibels...

Which is louder than anything that has ever existed, ever. 152 to 168 is like a gunshot. Just for reference. 1100 decibels. You can rip space and time and create a black hole. I don't know why. My brain put that to memory for fucking ever. I thought black holes weren't even real anymore. No, they're real still. Yeah, they are. They're real. No, dark matter. Is it dark matter? Dark matter might not be real.

Is Pluto a planet right now? I forget. No, it's not. Right now it's an extraterrestrial body. That identifies an extraterrestrial body. It goes around the sun. It doesn't have a moon. It is not a moon. It is a planet. What are we doing here? We don't know because you have the Oort cloud. The Oort cloud might touch the Oort cloud. That's why they confuse it. So they treat it more of a comet.

And that is why it's like, I'm going to say something controversial. New York Ross Tyson is an asshole. Oh dude. He can lick my taint. I got your back on that one. Right? Yeah. Arrogant prick. I'm really smart just because I say big words and I talk in circles. Ooh. Ah, take a breath, dude. Now move on to Bill Nye. Oh, Bill Nye let me down. Oh, his little comeback episode special garbage.

Neil deGrasse Tyson, he goes hard on some stuff and then just... He goes hard on the dumbest shit. He's a contrarian about everything. I literally watched somebody say...

I love Apple products. iPhones are the best, except Google maps is way better than Apple maps. And, and the autographs Tyson proceeded to fucking argue that Apple maps was better, which it isn't. Everybody knows that there's not a single person that's used both that thinks that. And he argued for fucking 10 minutes that Apple maps is better for no fucking reason. He talked about like a people's memory. He was in, I guess he was in court as a part of a jury and,

And some person like was trying to, as defense attorneys often do, they'll try to play this game. And I forget what the term is, but there'll be like, Hey, listen, you know, based on this study, you know, a person's memory is only so precise for a certain amount of time. And then it can be altered. And Neil deGrasse Tyson brings it up because he's fucking smart. So he has to bring up that point to the judge about like, well, I'm concerned about this person's memory because I'm so fucking smart. And, and,

And the judge is like, oh, so what you're saying is this. And her rendition of what he had stated was incorrect. And he goes, ah, actually, you just proved my point. Your memory is different than what actually happened and what I said. And I'm like, no, no, shut the fuck up and stop ruining the justice system. It's already broken, you grass titan. Don't make the justice system Pluto. Stop it.

He's just, he's all arrogant about like, well, see, like his, basically his arguing point was everybody's memories fucked. So you can't rely on eyewitness testimony. Everybody goes free. And as the stupidest, it's just dumb, smart people that have never been robbed.

Making dumb statements. You know what I mean? It's like every once in a while, I'm not saying crime is good, but every once in a while, crime needs to happen to some moron so that they stop saying stupid shit about how, well, you know, I don't really like it that you arrest people in front of their children. It's traumatizing. They shouldn't have sold crack and shot at people two weeks ago. I wouldn't be here with a warrant.

I don't think the kid's traumatized because I kicked in the door and arrested mom and dad. They're traumatized because all the heroin addicts are fucking bringing in copper pipe and dad's beating the shit out of them because they don't have any money to pay for the crack that they bought. I love this. That was Neil deGrasse Tyson to that. Just for real. It would be a privilege to be inside your brain, man. Neil deGrasse Tyson is like the trickle-down economics of dumb.

It starts up here and then everybody, he's like, oh, look at me. I'm on a fucking ivory pedestal. I did stuff. And so everything he says is smart to himself, unless you fucking listen to him. And then you're like, please, please just go snort some more moon dust and stay in your office looking at stars. I'll listen to you for stars. Don't give me legal advice.

That's why I like this friend group. We're all like, I'm good at like three things. Otherwise I'm retarded. And that guy's like, I'm good at looking at stars. I'm an expert in fucking everything. Right. It's really annoying.

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Go now! I'm going. The knife missile. We need to go back to that. Oh, yes. I feel like I've heard about it. I'll let you give a synopsis and then go ahead. Go ahead. Do your thing. Or with the hellfire missile.

I'm familiar with the Hellfire. I'm not really familiar with how it works. I just know that it's a missile and it's really effective. Okay, air-to-surface missiles. Go ahead. I'm a missile guy. Oh, yeah, there we go. Now we've got something he can talk about. Air-to-surface missile usually launched from, I mean, Apaches, they're the primary source of it. They are laser-guided. They can do heat and lock-on and all sorts of other shit. They can be, you know, do radar stuff too. But they travel around Mach 1 and they carry normally around a...

Oh, shit. This one I don't know off the top of my head. I want to say it's 10 pounds of high explosive. But they can carry, like, thermobaric. And there's a couple different versions of them. But, yeah. Missile go from aircraft to ground at about Mach 1 and kaboom. Okay. So, there you go. Now he's up. America wanted a...

More precise version that didn't go boom for taking out very specific people in crowded areas because I wonder if I have heard of this taken out, you know, hiding in areas. So it's a hellfire missile that they took like five or six 24 inch fucking swords. And instead of being full of TNT, right, is it is about to impact the swords flay out of

And it just smacks you with swords going Mach 1. This is exactly what I saw. Who did we take out with that? That was when the... Not Al Bagdaddy. It was before. It was 2019. It was a guy that was a head planner of 9-11. Yeah, it was in 2019 in Kabul because...

He was on the road too. Like it was a, cause you can see the picture and like the blades you can see on the road. So he's looking at the car, but we did, we used it like a year or two ago on the dude that planned nine 11 and he was living in a house and we found out about it. And every morning he would go out on his balcony to drink his coffee and just fucking

It murked him on his balcony with this fucking thing. But here's the thing. Oh, what about that? Let me see that. This Reddit post says it's a health fire variant made by the CIA. The CIA didn't fucking make it. Shut up. No, it's fucking Stunk Works. Lockheed and Martin did that. It's fucking Stunk Works. We know that. But see, here's the thing. I love it. It's a great idea. And...

People, that's how you can tell people are used to America just doing weird shit. Because if any other country in the world had been like knife missile, we'd be like, man, those guys are fucking crazy. But because it was Americans, they're like...

okay that makes sense fucking but it's pointless i love it but it's pointless no it's not gonna filled it with gummy bears and hitting somebody at mach one with 75 pounds is still gonna fucking kill him yeah but you need like this much just in case you miss you know just to read it though instead of an explosive warhead the hellfire missile deploys pop-out swords that's all you need right there the part that annoys me about this the most so is when you read about it on the internet people get all mad about how cruel and inhumane america is when it's literally the

There's not another entity on the planet that would spend hundreds of millions of dollars to develop a missile to take out one fucking dude trying as hard as physically possible to not have like... Mass cash. Yeah. Innocent people getting hurt.

And people still look at it like, oh, you guys are fucking assholes. I saw a meme that captures that shit perfectly. It was like modern day and it shows, okay, we have the target. Which seat of the car is he in? And then it showed like 1944. It's like, we're over the city. Bombs away. I mean, look at Tokyo. The Tokyo firebombing. You're like, 100,000 people. Tokyo gone. We don't have to nuke that anymore. Period. They're like, okay, we're good. Funny thing about nuke in Japan is like Hiroshima was like,

a Christian city. Was it? Yeah. It was either Hiroshima or Nagasaki. But it had a large Christian population. And so America was just like, you know what? They're already going to heaven. Let's just make it. We'll save them. We'll save them. We're actually doing them a favor. Instead of going for other Japanese people that might not see America as like a, hey, okay, we get along. There's a similar religion there. No, they're like...

those are kind of our guys, but well, they're going to see Jesus. And so they go towards the light, you know, it's fucking crazy. Like, uh, so if I went down to the Fort Sill training support facility and they got a flag from the guys who had been taken prisoner, uh, on baton, uh,

During the baton death march. They built this flag after like they were getting liberated. They like sewed it all together and shit. And like stood at attention for the flag. It's the first time they've done it in like four years right. But just think of the mentality. So they fought for like six months cut off. On the baton peninsula. Fought like f***ing crazy. Like I challenge anyone to find. Any nation that has ever fought that f***ing hard. To like the bitter end. And they only gave up because they were ordered to. And they ran out of ammunition. So then they do the baton death march. Which is.

Awful if you guys have never read the book was it unbreakable don't watch the movie the movies but the book is fucking Atrocious what the Japanese did to those guys so that's 1941 right 1941 that happened they go to all sorts of different POW camps or one of the POW camps they go to is in is right outside of this little known place called Hiroshima right small place not important right

And so you're there for four years. Like you're getting, I mean, just beat to shit. You're losing people. You're being starved, like malnutrition, malaria, all this shit. And then one day you look up and you see a fucking atomic bomb go off at the city right next door. And you're like,

What did I miss in four fucking years? Like, that'd just be, that'd be such a mind fuck that you'd be like, we were fighting with these old, outdated World War I shit, and now four years later, the sun just showed up over a fucking Japanese city. I can tell you exactly what I would do. I would be there as a POW, and I'd see it explode, and then my Japanese prison guard would be right there, and I would go, Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Holy fuck. Something tells me that wasn't an ammunition. Holy shit. It's funny. I'm just looking over and the person was like,

It's funny because like two days after that, the Japanese guards literally abandoned the POW camp. They just left. They're like, fuck this. I'm out. You know what would be like really kind of fucked up is like America took the Japanese sword makers from that area and then made them make the blades to that Hellfire missile so they could put it in. It's like it's a false story. There's just guys that are like, still doing it the old way.

falling steel and steel like this is amazing I'm made from steel and CIA agent just goes here thank you very much and zoom oh what the fuck this will be passed down generation after generation do the entire ceremony General MacArthur I give the sword to you

I know. There's like, I don't know. I know what to do this yet. I need four more. I know what I want your reaction to. What's that? It's like a trending thing on the internet right now with all the fucking. Do you want to not just tell me and just do it right now? Do you want to just show it to me? I can't show you. It's too much. I just have to. It's like hundreds of tweets. It's a whole thing. It's like it's a bit like a big talking point with like the super ultra communist fucking sympathizers that are.

Japan did not surrender because of the nuclear bomb. They surrendered because the USSR attacked Manchuria around the same time. Where's Manchuria located? Like the Japan. I'm not sure where Manchuria is. I've heard of their candidate. Oh, Jesus Christ. Never. Isn't it northern Japan, like near fucking Korea? I gave my woman my phone so I can't check. West Japan.

So the USSR attacked, not Japan. And Japan said Japan was occupying at the time. Do you hear they finally have some pictures? I haven't seen. I've seen like one or two and I don't know how to there. Nanking. That's what I heard. Oh, wasn't that? Yeah. They like the Japanese were like cutting people up. We talked about this, right? Oh, yeah. Like millions. Oh, yeah. That was on that. You're going to have to mute this. But the name King is what it's referred to. Yeah. Yeah.

Mean that did that entire thing if you read the story on that? Was China communist at that point or were they still were in the middle of a civil war so they were kind of like our friend not our friend they were Enemy of our enemy was our friend. Yeah type of deal. Yeah, it's really upsetting Japan came in and fucking

Yeah. I mean, Japanese were like awful to anyone, even POWs. Like if you read that book, I'll give you an example of that book, the fucking unbreakable. They were allowed like hardly any water and one golf ball size thing of rice. That's what the POWs were allowed. Uh, Japanese prisoners.

And if you were caught stealing anything, it was, you were either beaten to death or like killed in many other creative ways. So like a guy was caught stealing water because he was fucking, you know, dying of thirst. And what they did is they shoved a garden hose down his throat, filled up his stomach and jumped on it like a water balloon. Yeah. Like the awful shit that the Japanese get is fucking wild, man. In Japan, they don't teach it either. They're like, we never did any of that shit.

It's America's fault, though. It's not theirs. They're just going with it. Yeah, of course. After World War II, there's literally an entire generation of historians right after World War II. They're literally called the revisionists, and their entire fucking life goal was to make America the bad guy in World War II. And they didn't succeed because everybody still kind of universally agrees, like, allied good guys, right? Access bad guys. Right. So, like, they didn't succeed at that. But what it did do was it made it...

played it off like Japan was a victim that didn't deserve nuclear bombing or whatever. And then that because of that, that's why nobody knows about how fucking horrific all the shit the Japanese were doing is. That's why that's not taught. That's why it's way lesser known. And then that what that translated to is that's why every war after World War Two, everybody thinks that America fucking lost or America was doing the wrong thing. It's literally because of that. It's an entire generation of historians whose entire ethos was America bad.

And that was their whole fucking plan. Every time someone brings up, you haven't won anything since World War II. I challenge you to find any time during Vietnam, the Iraq War, the Afghanistan War, where American forces surrendered or retreated. I challenge you. Best of luck to you. Nicholas, can you inform everybody how we actually won Vietnam? We won Vietnam. He informed me of this. Once upon a time. Oh, this is going to be good. December 18th, 1972.

The year of our Lord. America is fighting in South Vietnam and they're fighting gorillas known as the Viet Cong and the gorillas are being supplied by the North Vietnamese communists via the Ho Chi Minh trail. And America decides we're going to bomb the communists in North Vietnam so that they can quit giving supplies to the Viet Cong. And that's going to be the end of it. Now,

They launch a mission called Operation Linebacker 2, and the plan is to bomb the North Vietnamese all day, every day with B-52s. Okay, I think those were, what, 180,000 pounds of ordnance apiece? 70,000. Maybe that version was more, but they're 70,000 now. Okay, so 70,000 apiece. It's all day, every day for...

From December 18th till Christmas, affectionately known as the 12 days of Christmas is what they called this. I would love to hear that song on the first day of Christmas. My true love gave to me.

Looks like I got a buff video to make. He's going to fucking talk about it. That's a really good one. I like that. So this is 1972. The commies won't tell you it happened this way, but we know the truth. I'll fucking tell you. I was dropping payloads and panties. Cease fire over Christmas. We send a transmission. All right, you fuckers ready to come to the negotiating table yet?

Now, dope. Next day, 60 B-52s in the air at one fucking time. Jesus, I love America. That's more fucking planes than all but two other air forces on the planet. America sent to go bomb them at one fucking time. Bombed all of them before the 60th plane landed back on an American airfield. They had sent a transmission. Okay, we're ready to talk.

So we have the Paris, we have the Paris peace accords. I believe it was signed in March, a couple months later in March of 1943. The deal was the peace treaty that America forced North Vietnam to sign was here's the deal. You're going to leave Laos and Cambodia and we're going to leave Laos and Cambodia. Okay. You're not there. McAfee sog definitely isn't there racking up 158 to one kill ratio. Uh,

okay we're both not there let's both not be there that's part of the fucking deal okay the other part you and south vietnam are going to come to a peaceful resolution amongst yourselves and north vietnam said okay and they signed the peace treaty that they were forced to sign by america how do you win a war by making someone give up and sign a peace treaty oh thank you rich holy fuck most people don't understand that okay now

That's what fucking happened. That's early 1973. And everybody goes, but what about fucking evacuating Vietnam in 1975? That was literally the American embassy. That's it. Everybody freaks out like that's fucking America pulling out the whole military. The military wasn't even fucking there. That was the American embassy with 5,000 or less Americans between military contractors that were still cleaning up all the shit from the

war they just had diplomats, businessmen, Americans, all the people that were there. That's who we were evacuating. Like America won the war, forced them to sign the peace treaty. And then three years later, the North Vietnamese came back and fought the South Vietnamese. And you're like America lost. And here's the argument that historians say, because historians are like,

War isn't determined by the outcome. It's determined by what your intentions were when you started and whether or not you achieved those and their argument. I'm not shitting you. This is the fucking college historian level fucking argument for America losing America lost because their goal was to prevent the spread of communism and

communism spread after they showed up and prevented it the whole fucking time. Can you understand how fucking retarded that is? Imagine that you're a firefighter. Imagine that you're a firefighter. You get called to a house fire. It's hard to pretend to be that gay. Sorry. Oh, you don't like the second responders? We don't like the second responders.

Let me secure the scene real quick. Imagine that you're a cop. Yeah. Oh, I like those guys. And you show up to a fight. Small dicks, but they're effective. You show up to a fight and there's this big dude beating up a little dude, right? And you show up and you stop the big guy from beating up the little guy and you beat the fuck out of him until he says, okay, I'm done.

And you're like, cool, I'm going to go home now. And then three years later, that guy beats up that guy again. And you get a phone call saying that you didn't do your job three years ago. Does that make any sense to anybody?

That's fucking retarded. That's the best way. You just, that is the most simple way to fucking explain that. It's so fucking stupid. Cause at that point, cause I bring this argument up every fucking time because I'm like, okay, well if the goal can't ever change, never. Otherwise you're a failure. Nobody's ever won a war.

Literally fucking ever. Because shit changes eventually, right? It's just different when America does it because the fucking revisionist historians just want to be America fucking bad all the time. I hate it. I'm so mad. So that's the way I explain Afghanistan to people. Because I don't know about Iraq. But in Afghanistan, what we do is every year during the fighting seasons, because you guys all know they have fighting seasons in Afghanistan. They show up in the spring with a bunch of fucking...

retards they have they have fucking recruited from pakistan or uzbekistan pick a fucking stand they all go to the different stands over there right so they come across the border they get their shit pushed in by uncle sam every single time they get into a fight they run away like bitches because we just fucked them up right they run back to pakistan they they fucking throw some more money at the next generation of fucking idiots they come back the next year we kill all the dumb ones and we did this for 20 fucking years so like people like you lost in afghanistan it's like okay at

Afghanistan is a house. We're going to treat it like that. I go to your house and I beat your ass, but you start hiding. And every day I'm in your house, just looking around for you. And every time I find you, I fuck you up and I do it for 20 years. And then finally I'm like, this is boring. I'm done with this. And you just, I won. Cause you didn't, you didn't finish the job. Like what? I can turn you to glass. If I really felt like it, like I could foundation your

house in 10 minutes. You just made the United States a burglar. Hey, where are you? Oh my God, Keith Mack! Your story is America illegally kicks in the door of their neighbor's house and then beats the fuck

out of their neighbor and the neighbor's like I'm gonna hide from you and you're like yeah you fucking better. You show up every two days. That's a horrible analogy. That's a horrible analogy. The neighbor came out and threw a rock and broke our window. I feel more like I feel like the United States John Wicked Afghanistan like the

The Taliban did 9-11, which is basically killing our dog. And we were like, no, no, not the puppy. And then we went over to their house and we just, you know, did all the Russian stuff where we're like, I think I'm back. But it's crazy when you look at the numbers. So it was a little under 3,000. I think it's six less than 3,000 people died in 9-11. I think it's like 2,994.

Died in 9-11. But in Afghanistan, 20 years of fighting, 2,400 soldiers died. It's like, you killed more people in 9-11 than you did in 20 years of fighting us, and you want to tell everybody you fucking won. Okay, we wish you the best in your future fucking endeavors. The other annoying part is you can't even win a war because there's no fucking official government there to even sign a peace treaty with, at least not one that actually has control of their shit. So it's like, you're not even fighting a war.

Imagine if America just did it where they won the war like fucking three, seven days later. We're like, oh, we win. And then we just pulled out instantly. Can I say that? That'd be way more gangster. It's like, boom, killed. Okay, bye. What do you think Desert Storm was? You said it. I said it.

I think you said it in your video, Stormy Norman Schwarzkopf, and I have known it for forever, and I loved your talking point, because it's absolutely true. Stormy Norman Schwarzkopf was like, we're going to push past everybody and just take over Iraq as fast as we can, because the politicians are going to fuck this up. And then we took, we fucking laid waste to Iraq in like, what, 14 days?

The air raid was 30 days. The ground war. I think it was 100 hours was the ground fucking war. It was super short. The ground war was like days, a couple days before they had all of the Iraq forces pinned and separated completely. Was it you that made a video about how we smoked all their tanks because they bunkered up their tanks? Yeah. They fucked up.

Especially in the 90s because that's when Abrams brand new, the T78s, T72s that they were using, outdated and then they didn't have GPS. That was 73 Easting, wasn't it? 73 Easting was a fucking turkey shoot. They didn't know shit. How many, we only lost, did we even lose a single Abram? It was like one Abram. They all got stuck in the mud because some private didn't know how to fucking. In America, an Abram has never been lost in combat. Abrams have been lost to IEDs, but that's it.

And then we use that fat. How many tanks? They lost like a thousand. Yes, all of them. All of the. I think it was like one battalion. It wasn't even Abrams going. Like we had Bradley's out there fucking shit. That tow missile fucks, man. I know. But I mean, we still had like there's stories and like full animated reenactments where they interview the guys. It's like two Bradley's come up over a ridge and there's like there's like 30 fucking T-72s. And they're like.

We got four tow missiles. Let's fucking go. They fucking take out like five fucking tanks somehow and then dip. It's fucking awesome. It's nuts, man. Like there's, I've seen some of those interviews from 73 Easting. Those guys in those Abrams, I think the only armored vehicle we lost in 73 Easting was to Friendly Fire, if I'm not mistaken. What the fuck? Yeah, we, look, they weren't doing it so we kicked our own ass, okay? Murder. We wanted to fight. What dude was just like, yeah, that's definitely not one of ours.

I can tell by the color. That thing that looks nothing like the enemy tanks that we've been studying. Like the one I'm in. Yeah. Did they get one of ours? We should definitely shoot at it just in case. Rich, you've met privates. There's a funny saying, and I enjoy saying it. What's the difference between a trash can and a tank? There's only one dirt bag in a trash can. Ouch. Yeah, it's one of my favorite tanker slangs.

I used to be a tanker. You know that, right? You little engineer fuck. Oh, fuck you. Crunchies. They make a nice crunch splat when you go underneath the tracks. Airborne tanker. Fucking no such thing. Nope, nope, nope, nope. So when you hang your ass over the edge of the tank, you take a shit. Oh, man. At Fort Knox, I was like standing at the edge. Like there's the sponson box and the bustle rack. I was right at the back.

corner. Oh, I know what the sponson box and the bustle rack are. Have you ever heard of the brussel sprout? It's part of the expected for choice. And if you don't properly cut the epididymis, then you'll freak out the flamboyant flamboyant. So,

I'm standing between the big cage on the back of the turret and the little toolbox on the side of the turret. Oh, that was hard. Thanks. I'm standing there, middle of the night, taking a piss. I was using a big work piece. I'm better than you because I know the words. You can just say the box on the back. You did it.

So I'm standing there taking a piss. I was still in an OSIT and dude snuck out right behind me. It was, it was on the tank middle of the night and he snuck out and kicked me into my own piss off of the top of the fucking tank. That's awesome. Yeah. It was not a good experience. That was probably the worst that I ever had. You tried to flex big words on us to tell us a story about how you got kicked into your own piss. Yeah. Dumbest shit. Tankers are cool.

I got kicked in my own piss. You're really fighting for it. Speaking of assholes that think they know everything, Elon Musk making it fucking trending on the internet that tanks are obsolete and dumb is the second most annoying thing on the internet to me. When did this happen? This was like a year ago, but he's like, ah, tanks are just

Their dummy could take them out with a javelin this whole time. Tank warfare has changed a lot, I will tell you that. It's changed. It's changed, but they're not obsolete. They do great point security. They do great open terrain. In an urban environment, enough anti-tank guided missile teams are going to fuck up a column of armor. Yes, I agree. Because...

guided missiles have just got way better but open terrain you're never gonna be able to fucking when you talk to these fucking idiots they're like oh they're just gonna pull the javelin out of their back pocket like in the video game this thing weighs 80 fucking pounds you know how fucking hard it is to have the right two dudes that are trained in the right place at the right time to shoot a fucking quarter of a million dollar missile how much does a javelin weigh they're about 250 000 they're like quarter million dollars how much do they weigh

I think with the clue, they're right around 70 pounds, 75. What's a clue? The clue. Cause I don't have one right now. It's the little thing they look through. Yeah. The little thing. The iPad that aims it. Yes, pretty much. We want to even take the, it may like the,

the 50 Cal sniper rifle on missions. Cause it weighed too much. It's 48 pounds, isn't it? Yeah. We're like, nah, the thing weighs too fucking much to walk out for a mile and set up an OP. We're like, nah, we're good. No one's taking out javelins. Cause you cannot just stealthily do that. When we take out AT fours, one of the first things, aren't rain. It was, I just remember these are lighter if we shoot them. So that's how we start ambushes. Yeah. Always with an AT four. Well, also I feel like that is, is,

a good way to put people's heads down too. Yeah. I was, well, you're not supposed to start. The first time I saw, the first time I saw one using combat, it was so lackluster because, well, yeah, I mean, you're doing an open leaf set with a rocket. I mean, there's so many people that are disappointed that you don't know how to use iron sights. Had a vehicle. Boom. And then it goes, yeah,

And there's the house behind the vehicle. We're like, oh, close enough. Whoa. Call off civil affairs. They'll pay for it. Yeah, I've been there. The first time I ever saw one fired, though, like he hit the wall. It was a wall. It was like, I don't know, 200 yards away from us across this open field. Hit the wall. Like it was loud as shit, obviously, because it's not everyone thinks it's like a like the movies like a shoot.

No, it's boom and then it's flying across the fucking the terrain and then it's boom whenever it hits There's there's no swoosh and you can't see it move by they're not slow But he fired it as most squad leader Mowdy fired this fucking thing it hit the wall and there was like nothing happened Like there was a little smoke behind us like this is this is fucking garbage by the time we bounded up there I saw that it put a hole like this in the wall and the wall behind it was fucking gone like that That's what it did. I was like, oh that makes perfect fucking sense. Oh

I'm mad Tyler Gray isn't here for you to meet him. Us three did a podcast with him. It's like one of the best podcasts we've ever done. He was a Delta boy, Delta. And he's like,

like kind of being secretive at first and then he starts opening up about some shit and he's like yeah we had these grenades that would like just collapse a building on itself i was like that sounds like a thermal barrack explosion he's like yeah they're like the size of a two liter it'll just fucking collapse the whole building and then oh and then he goes cqb at4 and we're like and we all went excuse me i heard about the cqb at4 bro that's right and he thought all of us would know what that is he's like yeah everyone used him like

I think I saw that episode or just like that little snippet where you're just like, yeah, we're just going room clearing with an AT-4. Yeah, we use that all the time in normal combat. I'm like, that dude. Yeah, it's like you're Epididymis on the back of the Smishmorgas. The Smishmorgas.

god damn it you know you want me to start using big missile words i can start using big missile words i don't want to feel stupid and make funny even more what the fucking plane thing plane thing because you do all the plane videos and shit how annoying well i guess you don't try to do like the history shit too much plane nerds are like bro if you if you say if you're like this is an f-18a they're like no it's not that's an f-8a b-27 i can tell because there's a dimple on the back

Yeah, it's a block 20. What? Yeah, it's nuts. So like I try and make jokes about the growler and I can't find a picture of a growler. It's a it's F-18. It's designed for cyber warfare and like jamming radars. It's the scariest thing in the air in my book, like because I stare at those things through radar. They're terrifying. And that's

That thing I can never find a fucking picture of it So like I just have an f-18 and every time I make a video with the f-18 I have to be like I know this isn't a growler But I'm making a growler joke like I have to do that because my whole comment section is just that's not a growler like I fucking know and all the Brits right now are laughing at the term growler because growler is apparently a euphemism for a Clunge lady parts. Yeah, Harry Axel The worst comments though or anytime I do a video on the AC 130 or the a-10 warthog

And I hate it. Every fucking time without fail. This is actually only useful if you have air superiority. Cool.

We always do. We name a kind we haven't, fuckface. We invented planes, you fucking moron. We invented air superiority. Literally. We're just making up new words for it, too, because it was like air superiority, then air supremacy, and now we're on air dominance. The next one's like air omnipotence or some shit. It's so fucking stupid. Air supremacy sounded a little... A little 20th Special Forces group. That's what it sounded like. That's not a flying bee. Yeah.

What's that? What were the three again? Air supremacy. Excuse me. Air superiority. You notice how the middle one's like... Yeah. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Air supremacy, air dominance. Yeah. And then it's going to be air fucking cleansing. I don't know. We're just going to move on. But then like... We must do the air cleansing now. The A-10. I don't know who did it. The A-10 gets so much hate from fucking internet nerds because they're like...

You know, the A-10 has more friendly fires than any other plane. That's why it's bad. It's like, also, hear me out. Maybe. Maybe. Go on. It also has the most friendly fires because it's the only plane that's designed to shoot people on the f***ing ground. Jesus. I wonder the amount of times that people have gone, uh, danger close. And they're like, alright. Holy f***ing s***, you're dead on. Keep doing that. Yeah.

The guy's leg just hit me from 50 yards away. That thing, we didn't know what those were. Like, I didn't know what they were until the first time I literally saw one 400 yards away. It hit this and some jackasses were shooting at us and we're just like, yeah, we need closer. It was open terrain and shit.

They're just like, we need close air support. And apparently everything in Kandahar was bored at that time. So we got eight tens Kiowas and an Apache. So eight tens came through like we got eight tens inbound. I was like, I don't know what the fuck that is. And like I heard the and the ground, you could feel the ground vibrate from 400 yards away. I was like, what the fuck is that?

That's depleted uranium. It was fucking nuts. And, like, you see trees blown in half and buildings collapse. I was like, whoa. It was the coolest shit, man. Props to the bad guys for fighting after that. Yeah, no, like, they were... That would be absolutely terrifying. I'd be like...

I gotta like, this is the thing. I hate the Taliban, but I do admire their fighting spirit because they're outgunned, out-trained, out-equipped. Like every measurable category, we beat them and they're still like, we got this, right? We're fucking ready for it. Let's do this shit. That's like a five-year-old bouncing his forehead off of a kitchen table too many times. I'm proud of him because he kept doing it. He's just too stupid. Yeah.

Right? You're not wrong. You said it yourself. We go to Pakistan, we pick up all these idiots that are poor and stupid, and they're like, we can handle it. And then, they're like, we can still handle it. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's what the tailwind is. It's a bunch of fucking five-year-olds with a bandage on their head because they just keep hitting the kitchen table. And mommy's too dumb to put a helmet on it. Oh, fuck.

No, you're doing a great job. You're really brave with all those bruises on your sunken in forehead. You got a dent in your forehead and people aren't calling you dumb. They're calling you brave. It's about consistency. Rich, did you fly to Afghan or Iraq? Both of mine were in Iraq. Both of them. It's so disappointing because I really wanted to go fight the Taliban and I ended up just like...

creating like the sinkhole for Iran to get more powerful. I mean, we, we found the first ISIS kill house in Iraq and Mokhtar Diyar. Like we didn't, it was ISIS. We didn't know what that was because it did not exist or to us, especially we're just like, Oh, it's just a kill house. This is a torture and slaughtering people. We don't know what this flag means. We don't know what this most nonchalant way ever of talking about a kill house.

Yeah. Since we're on ISIS, let's talk about what happened in Russia. Was everyone excited or upset about that? Let's gauge the room a little bit. So fast forward, we pushed like... Loved that they cut off that dude's ear and fed it to him. Unpopular opinion.

You go after civilians like that. Yeah. Let's see it. Good. Really set the standard. You know how to make people not do that again. Exactly what Russia's done. And I know, I know, Hey, we're America. We're better than that. We can't be torturing people, you know, whatever. But at the same time,

You know, you put that shit up on YouTube and everybody in the Russian government's like, yes, we could have your ear if you try to kill our people. We should show this, yes? And everybody's just like, you just showed a guy getting his ear cut off and people eating. And they're like, please don't go and kill civilians. Meet us face on. Okay. You know, Ukraine, we do not like, you know, but they do not kill civilians, so we don't cut off their ear if we do them. I feel like the whole world watched that and was just like, I...

They deserve it, but fuck, I don't... Shit, I don't know how to feel right now. It's like beating up the guy that smacked your sister. Yeah, you're like... You're like, all right, you know, he doesn't, like...

He earned it. Yeah. He earned every bit of that. They're not going to do it in a while. No one's going to be like, ah, oh. Can we talk about, I saw the video of them like walking through the mall and firing. And one of the guys, AKs, immediately was just firing, was shooting sparks. It looks like he was shooting dragons breath. It was dirty ammo. So if you're shooting a lot of Russian ammo, wolf ammo or anything like that, especially how they build it when you have steel casings, it's extremely dirty. Yeah.

And it will shoot God fireballs because of how they make their rounds. Cheap, shady shit. Just having fireballs. I'm talking about fireballs. I'm talking about sparks that shot out like 15, 20 feet from the barrel. It looked like a dragon's breath shotgun. Yeah, you can find them on Reddit. No, that's what I mean. Like.

If you do that, it's just like it's becoming basically frangible in the barrel. It's just it's like burning out and like shooting specs. He was firing into a crowd of like 10 people. I thought it was a shotgun. None of them were going down. They were still moving and being like, oh, God, which is terrifying for them.

fucking shredded the rounds or i think so yeah that's fucking nuts man they probably had like a samurai torch you know two samurai swords in the barrel they're like it's gonna make it four bullets man it's gonna make four bullets i saw the u.s do it with a missile so it could work for us oh my god unpopular opinion about assholes which real quick because we talked about this i've been sitting on it no no no you've been sitting on your asshole yes absolutely talking about the um

The Japanese, right? So there's just like one story. I think there's a couple of them, but one sticks out in my mind. And there was this Japanese soldier that was on an island and he stayed there forever. And they found him like 20 years later. And he was like in a tattered uniform. And they were like, we're so proud of you. You stood your ground. You were like...

You're a piece of shit Japanese soldier. That's not cool. You're out there killing all these innocent people in China. That's not a dude to be celebrated. He's in the Philippines. His name was, I think it was Hiro Ota was his name. Yeah. He killed like 29 or 30 innocent Filipino civilians over the time that he was doing that. He's a piece of shit. Yeah.

So this dude was so loyal to the cause because they were like, hey, only your commander can come and say it's over everything. They had his wife's. They thought the commander turned. He did. And then his own wife came out. His wife and his brother flew to the Philippines and were like out in the woods with megaphones. He's like not buying it. Please don't kill any more innocent civilians. It's been a 40 years.

Speaking of assholes, that's my favorite quote ever. Donald Trump, don't trust the China. China is an asshole. It's my favorite thing ever. Oh, my God. Every time that you talk about communism, I always think of... Don't trust communism. China is an asshole. It's the best. That man lives in my brain right free. Good.

Oh, there it is. It should be the unburnt powder firing up as it's leaving the barrel. That is why the sparks are bigger on trash cheap ammo. Speaking of communism, did you see my new shirt? It's in my merch store. No. I have a shirt in my merch store that says, I heart communism. Oh, yeah. Go on. How much is that shirt? It costs $999.99, and it only comes in size small. Why does it only come in small? Because they hungry. Because they hungry.

I hope someone buys that fucking shirt. I wish that I could make a shirt with...

Che Guevara in it? Yes, that's exactly it. That's exactly what it looked like when they were shooting into the people. The unburned powder igniting. With Che Guevara and just have it laced with dumb sayings about how socialism is horrible. I remember being in high school and seeing people wear Che Guevara shirts. I was like, you know that guy killed gays. He just lined them up. He thought they were subhuman. That's the funny thing. It's like stupid high school kids are like,

I'd like to not have to work for a living. This shirt's cool. And it's like, you would actually fucking hate that guy. Like he is not a good dude, fucking

At all. It's not even close. It's fucking insane to me. No, that's why I mean, look at any new wave. It's like, as you say, communism. Leon, can you grab me a white claw? Hey, boy, Leon, just came in. Leon, did you want to come say hi? Well, he's a white cross. He takes a shit. Yeah, boy, a beautiful boy. This is our friend, Mr. Leon Lush. Hello. Good to see you guys. How you doing? You've got some white cum on the side of your face. Is it?

Oh, yeah. Well, I usually brush my eyes with toothpaste, so you're a little bit here. This guy closed... After a night of drinking, my gosh. Can you hear my voice right now? This guy, he closed the bar down with me. And you're my age, so you're hurting right now. Oh, yeah. I have my coffee. I'm hanging in there, but... He said the shittiest thing to me yesterday. He's like, because I'm from, you know, Buffalo, New York, and he's from Boston, and he's just like, yeah, man, you know what it's like. You know, we're both from New England, and I was like, don't you ever...

ever fucking say that I'm not from New Hampshire or Vermont I didn't know it was like when Donut introduced Meat Canyon before me I was like I was like dude that's the shittiest thing I've ever heard anybody say I'm so mad but it's so funny that's so funny I'm upset that I didn't think of it I'm mad that you said it I'm happy that it's hysterical there were so many emotions yes we're forever fellow New Englanders now I hate you I hate you so much I love you guys I love you buddy best don't

Oh, gross. Fly safe, buddy. Yeah, I hope you're not flying in a Boeing. 747. Beautiful. You didn't even give me a white claw. What a piece of shit. I got you. We got to dial it back. They're Caucasian claws. Oh. Caucasian. You, whoa! Where did the term Caucasian come from? I don't fucking know. The caucus. The caucus? Tell me more. Well, I mean, it's in the Asian area, so cock and Asian. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

It also means tiny white wiener. Yeah, I was like, speaking of, that's... Okay, what's some big content you guys actually have coming up? Coming up, I don't want to give away any secrets here, but I am working on... People have asked for my characters to be more long form, move them around more, have them interact with each other more. I'm working on that, but I don't want to give more than that.

So that's what I got coming. It's a long-form content. I'm going to be actually trying to create some types of episodes with my characters. Fuck yeah. How long? Some good stories. I mean, I'm shooting for 10 minutes. That's my goal is around 10 minutes long. So we'll see what I get out of it. That's that good money. 10 minutes is that good money. Yeah, well, we'll see. Be doing good. Rich, what are you working on? Jesus Christ. This video has taken me two months to make. It's 40 minutes long. It's posting today. So it'll be out already. So you'll be able to see it.

There is a group of men that go out and do fake basic trainings. Oh, my God. I'm not done. Oh, I know where this is going. And I am labor breath. The video starts off with me talking about a couple different groups that do it. And then it focuses on, I'd say, the last two thirds on this group called MDK. Murder, death, kill. That's the modern day night project. Oh, my God. Murder, death, kill. By the way, that's great reference. Oh, my God.

And there is a specific instructor in it named Steven. And Steven was a Marine from like 1996 to 2001 and screams at people and treats them like shit and goes off the rockers. And Steven, if you're watching...

You're upset because you never stayed in the military to fight alongside your friends after 9-11 happened. You coward. Also, fuck you, Neil deGrasse Tyson. Yeah. So I dislike him because he's a jizz and all these people are grifting off of the military experience. And I'll give you a specific example of why their jizz is grifting off the military experience is they have a bell like Navy SEALs like in Bud's. Yeah. And they have stamped on it U.S. Navy.

And the turds that pay $18,000 to get yelled at for three days by these idiots will ring the bell when they quit, just like the Navy SEALs. And they're all pieces of shit, and I dislike them. This is fucking bonkers. So I know exactly what you're talking about because they started popping up on my fucking Instagram. $10,000? $18,000. $18,000. And I looked it up, and I scrolled through the comments, and most of them are reasonable like us. Like, dude, just...

enlist. Like it's, if you want to get yelled at by another dude, just fucking get paid to do that. And, uh, most of them are like that, but every once in a while you get someone who obviously paid and like went through the whole process. Cause they're like, welcome to the club brothers. And like, you're a part of a higher learning. And I was just like, this is the greatest scam I've ever seen. My wife, she was talking to me about, she's like, it's perfect because if they succeed, it's because the program made them succeed. But if they fail, it's because they weren't ready to make the fucking change. And I was like, holy shit.

up thing because the program is supposed to make you better not force you to fail it's a great sorry i'm so upset i just like you've been working on it for two months and you are so fucking it's 45 minutes long and i i don't i i mean i don't i hold back a little bit i make sure to say things appropriately because i don't want to get like get some cease and desist order from these pussies

Oh, unfortunately there are some high, uh, the guy that runs MDK, the owner also has different offshoots. Some of the offshoots are legitimate and they like it. They teach people like skills. You pay like 10 grand for, I think he's a and unfortunately, uh,

Some of his offshoots have outstanding veterans in them because I don't think they're aware of how much of a and a grifter this guy is. Unfortunately, one of the offshoot businesses from this, the owner of this jizzy MDK has a good training regiment thing. I'll say good. I don't really know everything about it, but it seems to be a more pay to learn skills, not to get the shit kicked out of you. And Tim Kennedy teaches firearms training in it. Oh yeah. So that seemed okay. Yeah.

The training seemed good, worthwhile for the money. You're having special operators, crazy skilled dudes teach you for a substantial amount of money how they work and do the things. And hey, if you're going to pay, I don't know how much money it was for that school and you're going to have the crumb to the crumb of people that have been involved in it.

I can understand that purchase. You're learning. You're actually learning. You're learning from the best and you've got money to spend because you're fucking loaded. Hey, that's cool. If I could have enough money to have Chuck Norris teach me karate, I'd fucking do it. Right? Basically the same thing. Especially with that hat. Right? That's his only rule. These colors don't run. And...

But what I want those veterans and people to see is that the owner that owns both of those two things is such a piece of shit that you should just fucking stay away from him. Because all he cares about is the money and the bottom line, which as a business I understand, but you're willing to sacrifice the veteran space for it. And then the veterans that are there and stay there, Stephen, you bald piece of shit.

are grifters and they know they can they can just fuck off they can absolutely fuck off their turds you your veteran status has been revoked it's like john wick you're no longer consecrated grounds and he's the one that didn't deploy right what's that one of them didn't do he got out the guy steve specifically in his bio says uh he was a marine from 2000 uh 1996 to like 2001 uh

And he's like, and he's the psychopath that has absolutely no control over himself. Doesn't know what he's doing. Doesn't know how to lead. Doesn't know what any, what he's doing. All he knows is like, oh, my job is to make you fucking suffer. Like I'm sick of fan. And he, and guess what? You left in 2001. You left when you could have stayed in and fought alongside your brothers in Afghanistan against the Taliban. But no, no, you didn't. You're a coward. And now instead of,

being with your bros and being like, you know, we went through battle together. It was real and we fought the Taliban that attacked us. You yell at overpaid teenagers and grown ass men and pretend like you're hard. Suck my dick. Go run a marathon. I don't give a shit if you're shredded and 58 years old on TRT up your ass. You're a turd. You're a

I went to their website because after enough, I was like, how do they convince these idiots to do this? I clicked on their website and I want to say about 70 times on one page. It said flip the switch. Did you see that too? It's like when you're ready to flip the switch, come join us and be the elite so you can flip the switch and then you're going to flip the switch. I was like, bro, it literally says flip the switch on their website like 70 fucking times. If you have to...

I've seen one video and I always say it like this. If you have to yell and say you're the leader, you're not the leader. Up top. That is, that is. I'm in charge. No. If you say that, oh, you have zero respect and you are fucked. I'm literally waiting for the thumbnail to come out so that I can post it today.

Oh, dude, I'm excited. I know what I'm watching on my phone. Oh, I know. Everyone's like, okay, you're going to download that. What time does it come out, Rich? Dude, like the second this is done, I'm so hot. I'm hot right now. I'm going to sit on a couch right now. If you watch my video and you see the stupid shit this bald-ass fuck Steve does, you're just like...

You're a raging dick without a hole to go into. And that's all you are. And then the biggest thing that pisses me off is just, it's just, it just pissed me off so much. It's like, I'm a big chunk strange man. I just can't be. You left before 9-11 and didn't come back.

Fuck you. Fuck you. God, you're going to be angry cops in this video. No, I'm pretty. I have to stay even keeled until the end. And then the end, I say words. In the end, I say some words. We got the round, round, back out and everything? No, no, no. It's like 45 minutes. I couldn't do the run. I mean, I could scream for 45 minutes. That's really not that hard. But no, no, I did like a breakdown because I didn't want people thinking that I was one of these assholes screaming because I can't control myself.

I had to do a breakdown of it and be like, here you go. Here you go. This guy's got a valid, you know, social media following. This guy doesn't. This guy's a piece of shit. This guy buys his followers. These people are paying this much.

I'm so glad I finally met Rich in person. You know, two years ago we roasted each other. We had a little roast battle and then TikTok took everything fucking down. Oh yeah, it was gloves on. It was pretty kid gloves. People reported our shit for bullying. TikTok's garbage. It's fucking trash. So I roasted him, he roasted me. It was a good time. I hope TikTok gets banned.

It was almost there. Good. I'm now more than you on TikTok. I have 1.4 million. I really hope it gets banned now. I didn't know that, but I super hope it gets banned. Fuck you, HLC. You're like, this ends it. Do you even post on TikTok?

I'm still mad about these idiots and fake basic training. I can't not focus. I can't. This is your tism. When you get mad at something, it's so stupid. It's so stupid. They're taking advantage of idiots. I could not. That is one thing I've never understood is the idea of paying for leadership course to that degree. If it's like Elon Musk, I'm like, okay, he's going to teach me business for three days. I'm paying 18 grand, however much. I'm like, he knows his shit.

Obviously he knows his shit. I'm going to learn something. If homeboy starts yelling at me, I'm like, I do not like... I get it. In the video, I say I get it. It's people that weren't in that want the veteran status, right? What does the veteran status mean? It means this, right? We all deployed. We all get each other. We all...

We all understand the difficulties we went through, even though they might have been different. There's a brotherhood. We back each other up. There's government and non-government organizations that want to help us because of the things that we went through. It's one of those things. It's trauma bonding. It's trauma bonding. And also, this sounds really lame, and I cringe at saying it. We're like the warrior class of the United States because we've all been deployed together.

We signed our name on the line to do it. I'm only 29. Fuck all of you. Shitting on you made me happy. Drop me back to heaven. Are you good now? Yeah, I'm okay now. Don't worry, in a minute we're going to bring up that Marine that embezzled all that money and had a fake purple heart. Those guys are lame.

Can you imagine just like sitting around like a table with a bunch of bros and they're like, what if we did like basic training? And they're like, we should have a bell like the seals do. They have a wall of tomahawks. What's up with that? Do you see the wall of tomahawks they have? Is that for graduating classes? Tomahawks are cool. Oh, here we go. I hate my, you know, is the tomahawks. We got it so much now. They call us Tommy's. Somebody died in their training.

They killed the dude. See, that's what I thought. It was somebody died, right? Somebody died. And they're still doing it. They're still going on.

So $18,000 for like a dude and there's like 20 dudes in each class, if not more. And you couldn't have like a medical personnel there to like assist him. That's that's unfortunate. They're getting sued currently. Wait, they didn't have medical. I don't know if they did or didn't. They don't show anybody with even a fucking med pouch. Right. Well, even then in the video, I talk about like as a drill sergeant, like these want to be drill sergeants and screaming at people like even as a drill sergeant, we go through like medical training to make sure we can identify what's going on with somebody like Rabido or

Oh, yeah. Rabdo. And if you don't know what Rabdo, it is extremely deadly. It is the overexertion of muscles. Your proteins can't break down. So then your kidneys struggle. And that's why you pee out blood or really dark urine. And then your body just shuts down. Your body starts like eating away your muscle. My lieutenant had it. Kidney failure. Yeah. Terrible for you. And it's extremely hard.

to get to that point. We didn't see much of it. Military was the only time you really seen it until CrossFit came out. Then we seen a huge surge of rhabdo with CrossFit because it was like, oh, don't worry about this. We'll just fucking, well, you push through it. You push through it. You're fine. You're fine. Yeah, then you overexert yourself. Even if you're already physically fit, you can overexert yourself to an extreme. And then you can, dude, some people get rhabdo so fucking easy. I had one dude, um,

I did one workout session. This is personal training. I was fucking locked in. He's like, I don't work out. I was like, okay, this will be easy. I had him do 10 body squats up and down four times. It was like four sets of that. We'll do some pushups. We'll do light jump rope. I was easing him into workout and I was like, okay, here is just, and then diet.

I got a call from him. I was like, he was like, man, I can't move. I was like, man, we did a really light day. He's like, should my pee look like this? I was like, send a picture. Send it.

I was like, oh, bro, you got rhabdo. What the fuck? You barely did anything. And I had him go to the ER and then they loaded him up with IVs and everything. And they're like, oh, that was actually really close to kidney failure. That's how bad rhabdo is. You will fucking die. You can come back and be OK. But there are some points where you cannot.

And then your body's like changed forever. And now you can do like the minimal physical activity because your body will just break down. You know, just tear itself down. And they're just pushing people into that. I didn't know someone died. Someone passed away. And there's a suit going against them. And Steve.

And Steve, Steve is named in it. Steve is named in it. And I have a nice little cut of Steve like being super upset and me like, my job is to kill you. Well, you succeeded, Steve. You fucking did it. You did it. You couldn't do it to a fucking Afghan in the Taliban, but you did it to somebody in the United States, a United States citizen. Good job.

If you don't need a veteran, like none of us judge if you've not joined the military. Like I give a shit. If you don't deploy, I don't give a shit. I usually say you're one of the smart ones. My dumb ass didn't have a choice. I was like, I have a GED. I'm pouring Mexican. I can shoot guns. War. I got $1,800 a month. It's a very bad paycheck. It was an experience that I wouldn't wish upon anyone. And then I got back. I'm like, okay. Yeah.

Now I tell everyone, don't do that or join the air force. Like be smart. Do that. You're just sitting in your car. I've never, I'm not once in my fucking life would be like, if you haven't joined the military yet, you know what you can do? Pay 10 grand, do a five day course to get smoked out. And you will be such a leader after that. Fuck. No, never was my fucking life. Would I say that to anyone? One of them got a tattoo on his arm. It's a, it's like a whole upper sleeve tattoo.

And it's his graduating class of like six or seven guys like running through the sand holding like their class flag. It looks like a fucking seal tattoo, like a Bud's class tattoo. I'm telling you, that guy's going to get his ass kicked if he goes into the right club in San Diego. He's going to be like, what are you? What class were you in? Like, oh, I was in this class, but.

Buds? You were in class 002 for Buds? That's like in the 60s. No, no, not Buds, man. It was kind of like Buds. We had to ring a bell. We had to ring a bell. Pretty much the same thing. We had this Marine that got out and cowered before 9-11. His run right now, he's watching this episode like... It's the cringiest shit ever. It looks like a really good tattoo, but it's just like... It's like getting a really beautiful tattoo of yourself getting pegged.

Right? Right? Fucking Christ, man. That's the catch right there. I think we can end it on that note because our boy Nick has to go to the fucking airport. It's like the outer street is beautiful, but the...

The message is lost. Oh my God. Nick closes out the beautiful son of a bitch. Thank you for watching the unsubscribe podcast. I've been joined here today by my cohost, Mr. Eli Double Tap, Ethan, Mr. Habitual Line Crosser, and my dear friend, Mr. Angry Cop. Steven's a piece of shit. Where can we find you guys? I'm on...

the YouTubes under Angry Cops. I also have a website, angry-cops.com, where all the links are available because a friend of mine taught me that combining all the links together makes it easier for people to go and see. Holy shit, he taught me the same thing. Yeah. Because you can find me at habituallinecrosser.com. Great segue, wasn't it? It was good. Yeah, we're pretty good. Thank you guys for joining us. We love you. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

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