SHARING HER HUSBAND? -You Should Know Podcast-
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The You Should Know Podcast. We're back. Hey everybody, welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast. Episode 111 in translation. That's 111. Round of applause, please.

Yep, yep, yep, yep. Good morning to you. Good morning to you. Hey everybody, welcome back. There we go. There we go. Thank you. It's a lot of, there we go. Thank you everybody for coming back to the You Should Know Podcast. Not gonna lie to you guys, this might be one of the last intros ever, not because the podcast is ending, but maybe because we wanna, we have some new things coming to you. Be on the lookout for that. But if you are new here, if you haven't already, look below you and see that subscribe button. Is it pressed? You're wrong. If you're looking

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We got co-host Cam back in the studio! Back in the studio! Back in the studio! I'm back in the studio! I'm back in the studio! Back in the studio! I'm back getting groovy, ho! I'm back on the- Sorry. I could've went ballistic. Dude, I- I'm saving it for my debut EP, though, if I'm being honest. Dude, okay, honestly, if me and you put out an album, whose album would be better? Let's be completely honest.

You. Okay, thank you. Ooh, let's be, let's stroke my ego real quick. Let me ask you a question that's already answered. I don't think that's a stroke of the ego. Dude, if you and me did music, like, who'd be better at music? Because everyone knows I'm the lord at music and you're not. Uh, you. What is it with this guy? Okay, see, you started off with pure aggression and hatred. I was going to start the episode off with...

Bro, that was like we were a couple. You said, okay, so it's pure aggression and hatred. It's giving rude. I was simply asking for something else. No, I was going to start with love. I want up your love. Good morning. What if we did an album together? Oh. You take care of all the musical geniusness, right? What would you do? I'd just spit eights and sixteenths. Yeah, but I don't like... Like a wicked little witch. Okay, but I don't want you doing that. Why? Because you're going to... Everyone knows my rap voice doesn't sound better than yours.

Huh? My rap voice is not very good. Don't you start my rap voice. Are you nuts? Okay, deadass, honestly. What's your rap voice? That's an awfully hot coffee pot. Should I dub it on Donald Trump? Probably not. That's you. What's you?

I would be like Bobby Blue Blay. Okay, let's hear it. Bobby Blue Blay with a little bit of Young Thug. Okay, let's hear it. I'm like a hybrid of, I'm a hybrid of I'll sex you down. Okay. And then I'll also make you scared about your life. I'll take that same duo and give you a better one. I'm going to give you Danny Lay mixed with Young Jeezy. I'm going to give you some stuff that's going to leave high high jeans in a bag. Okay. Okay. Let's do this. Let's compare our rap voices. Go.

Is it rap? Rap. Yeah. Oh, it's a little deeper already? It's a little fake already? It's all good? It's all good? Okay, here we go. Yeah. Uh. Uh-huh. We have to say the same thing, though. That's the only way it's a fair... Please don't. Please don't, Cam. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't, Cam. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna talk about that in a minute. Boogs. I gotta think about boogs. Oh, I'm a boogie man. I am the boogie man. You're the boogie man. Okay. I don't know bars though. Give me like a bar to say. Okay. Okay. We'll do one bar. Uh, uh,

Something stupid, like something, you should know podcasts, we're here to stay. You should know podcasts, we're here to play. Oh my God, is this a church camp ritual? That's what you say to your youth group? This sounds like an orientation at the YMCA. We're here to stay. We're here to play.

Yeah, do the Lobo Rumble. Yeah, you swag surfing a**. Here we go. You should know podcast, we here to stay. You should know podcast, we ain't playing. Oh my God, he's already messed up. They literally get you out of the booth. Okay, you should know podcast, we here to stay. You should know podcast, we don't play. You go. All right, turn me up a little bit more. Your turn, let me go. Turn me up one more time. Keep it steady like that. Hey. Hey.

It's the You Should Know Podcast. We're here to stay. You Should Know Podcast. We're here to play. You're like Biggie Smalls with, like, a little bit of helium in his voice. Exactly. You're like a birthday clown, Biggie Smalls. But then I go, Levi High, jeans, and Ryan, keep that. I can get a little bit of...

A little bit of flow after that. Good morning. I was going to say to you, starting with love. Okay, yes, back to love. This is the first time in a long time we've spent so much time away from... How many times did I say time? I think you said it five times in that one. This is the longest we've spent time away from each other. Okay.

And I missed you. I just wanted to say that. Bring it in, bud. I missed you, too. I missed you more. And this is the thing that got so bad. You went to Oklahoma to go see your family. Yes. To go have graduation. Lives family, lives in Oklahoma, all of them, both parties. And, yes, we went to go see, went to celebrate some birthdays. Good morning. We went to celebrate some graduations. Shout out Kenzie P. Quick round of applause for Kenzie P. She finished nursing school. Congrats. Congrats.

And this is the thing. So I didn't realize how dependent on you I was of a good time. So I was home alone, right? Which is normal. But normally I get a random FaceTime from you. Maybe you'll come over. Maybe we'll go pump some iron. Pump some iron. Go shopping. We'll do something. Get some food. I didn't have that. I was dead alone. And so I was like, what do I do with my body? So...

I went around to different stores. I found myself in the third hour of being alone. I went to a Best Buy and was looking at security cameras to the point where I was walking around the Best Buy. One of the workers is a fan of the podcast. He goes, where's your guy at? And I go, he's actually gone. He's in Oklahoma with his family. They didn't invite me.

And I like started pouring my heart out to him and he goes, oh man, you all right? And he goes, you looking for like home security? And I was like, no. And he's like, these are the cameras. I was like, I have nothing else to do. So you were looking at security systems without the intent of buying it. And then you made a poor associate worker, uh, interim therapist for you. It was more of like Bubba. I was doing anything to drown the sadness out of my mind. Turn on a movie, go to a movie.

Go play a game. Drop and give me 50. But whenever I'm sad and I watch movies, I try to relate the movie to my life. And so if somebody has love in the movie, I'm like, I don't have that. You are like a spider web of emotions and anxiety. Okay, one thing I've noticed, there's never clear cut answers with you. Never. What does that mean?

Like that right there. Just go watch a movie. Well, I can't watch movies because then I relate to the personal character and then I pour it into my own life and if I don't have what they have, I'm in eternal darkness. It's like, just watch the movie. What's wrong with that? There's so many things. Hey, bro, you should go get this tattoo. Well, I can't get that tattoo yet because it looks good on that guy. He has the same tattoo and if I want to be him, I would just be him and not myself. It's like, it's never just, yeah, no, all right. I think it's critical thinking is what I do. But you do it out loud. Like,

Internalize it then just give the answer then

Maybe then you're like, oh, by the way, it's because of this. I share my deepest and darkest everything with you. Without you, I'm a blanket of nothing. That's not true. Without me, you are a stinky, sweaty, gorgeous young man. Thank you. And you are Cam. I am a big-headed loser. But how was your week? What did you do? Okay, actually, I don't want to hear that. You went to Oklahoma. I did. I went to... Never mind. I love Oklahoma. And you didn't talk to me really that whole weekend. That's not fair.

You didn't. Called him at least every day. Called him once a day. Yes or no? Once a day. Not enough. We're normally like six to ten times a day. That's very true. Moving it to one, I'm like, is there anything we need to talk about? What did I do? You sent me a video out of nowhere and you were in a underground bunker. Oh, yeah. So what happened? So, uh,

So we're sitting there. Liv's dad's house. Everyone's chilling, whatnot. Emergency alerts. Everyone has an iPhone. It all comes on at once. Yes. Okay. We look down. Tornado warning. That's like an hour and a half away. We'll be good. Okay. About an hour and a half goes by.

news pops on take cover take shelter we're like holy so this is the first time in my life i was actually in a like bunker like a tornado shelter her dad has one in the backyard yeah you open up this little fallout shelter looking thing sick and you crawl down and it's literally a concrete box with ventilation nothing there was a radio in there that i swear to god was from like

Maybe 94. Oh, it's a pedigreedial war. It doesn't work. There's no shot at works. They just, they've never thought to themselves to take it out and remove it. It does not work. It can't work. But we go down there and honest to God, the scary part. So the sirens are going off. The wind's crazy. There's lightning and stuff. The scariest part was it's raining and it's loud and we're all wet and stuff. We're down there. And then all of a sudden, so look, I'm going to paint the picture. Paint Picasso. Audio, audio, audio leave. What is it? Listeners? No, but no, for you, that's called something. Audibly. Oh,

No. Yes, but... Whatever. Good morning. Linguistics? What are you even trying to say? Close your eyes. I just want you to hear. Okay, there we go. So we're in a bunker. You're eight people. I get real nervous about closing my eyes in public. Just close your eyes. And don't squint your forehead. Don't do that. Okay, here we go. So it was like... Is that wind or a good time? That's... She's taking you to a car wash. What? What? What? What?

Stop. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. You sick, man. That's definitely a thunderstorm. That is a tornado. Oh. Okay. I've heard thunder before, too. Sorry. Here we go. I've been in a couple tornadoes. Sorry. All right. Close your eyes. This is literally how it was in the bunker. No BS. Like, 100%. I believe you. Do I think you're lying? We thought it was a good time. This isn't a good time. Here we go. I'm not even going to be able to do it now. All right. Stop. Go. Oh, shit.

What is funny about that? Lives were in danger. Why'd you laugh? I don't think your brain's fully developed. How? I think something got blocked off at puberty. Something got blocked off in me? Something got unlocked in you. What does that mean? All these jokes. Good time. Third leg. I've never said that. Human tripod. All these things. I think you're saying something about me. I don't know. What's the worst natural disaster you've ever had?

So to hell, literally to hell with power singing. Will you stop? Do you stop? Because you said I was underdeveloped. It was like a cliff note. Cliff note? That was falling off the cliff. I was in the middle of doing my thing, and you go, yeah, your brain's not anyway. Speaking of natural, and you just cut me off. I was doing the whole point with the rap genius of what your line was. Was that not eerie? So, bro, it's loud as hell, rain and everything, and literally it's like a seamless transition. All that to just...

Complete sin- What the f*** are you doing? You looked at- Did he not look over there? I'm painting the picture! What the f*** is over there? I'm just looking! I don't have to make intense eye contact with you all the time, creep! Yeah, but don't look at the floor over there behind my shoulder! You're a grimace.

Grimace? Shake? I can give you a shake. You're grimace. To hell with what I was saying. I was trying to paint an eerie thing and make it very enjoyable. So you're just saying it was a scary thing? Yes, it was quite scary. Did you ever get... I never once cried, but it was... I mean, actually, once I got in the shelter, I felt more safe. Yeah. Because I'm like, okay, this is literally what it's designed for. Yeah. But in the house, bro, you could see shit flying outside and, like, rain. That's scary. And I was like, ooh, no, no, no, let's go to the shelter. What do you think is the worst natural disaster to be a part of? I'm gonna go... I mean... I don't think it's hard.

I'd say if you're not evacuated, tsunami or an earthquake. Earthquake's the easiest one. What are you talking about? Okay, you're talking about a rector four. Who? I don't even know if I said that. It's really close to rectum. I meant the grade scale, like a four. I think it's called the rector scale. I don't know. I don't know. I didn't take that class. Okay, ask your question again, but now we're under the mindset of all of them are at their peak. So tornadoes are F5s. Tsunami is like...

300 foot wave. I think we're all in agreeance that the tsunami would be the worst. 100%. Because one, I can't swim. Or is the hurricane worse?

What's the difference? Tsunami, big wave. Big massive wave. Just one big wave. Big wave. It's a mad wave. Hurricane is essentially shit's happening far out there and a lot of it's going to come. You're getting crazy winds, crazy rain, and a lot of flooding. Sometimes hurricanes have tornadoes. I'm not sure if that's... I think. Has there ever been like an Avengers Infinity War of natural disasters?

right where they're like we were giving you fire earth wind it's it's avatar it's the last airbender you look up there's lightning you look down there's a fire the earth is trembling there's a tsunami wave i was like what the i'm like what is going on no but i'm i'm saying if there's a tsunami i give up not fighting back but you're supposed to already be gone that's the thing they tell you because the tsunami you can track it's not just like

surfing on the holy shit there's a big wave like it's not that it's like they know it's coming it's like clear out okay so that's why in the hurricane the same thing they can tell tornadoes happen within like

I mean, they know a big storm, but the tornado is what kind of formulates it. It's like, holy shit, you have like an hour. Turntables are like, what are you doing? Yeah, I never understand those people. Get the hell out of there. Yeah, leave, bro. What are you doing? I saw a flood in Dubai. Like a week ago or something? Yeah, no. The whole Dubai was flooded, right? I thought it was just the airport. I thought it was the whole thing. I actually don't know why it would just be the airport. We're just going to say that out loud.

But I'm pretty sure it was just the airport. Like we had a bad pipe. Yeah, it was like... Perfect. No, I think... I think... I'm least fearful of earthquakes. I think that would probably be the easiest one for me. Could you imagine? You're chilling. Yeah.

You're chilling. You're lonely and naked, right? Always. That was a bit harsh. I'm sorry. No, it's true. You're naked. You're by yourself. Not lonely. By yourself. That's nicer. And all of a sudden, your whole house falls into the earth's crust. And you're just... You're falling. You're just like... Like, imagine that. That's like... Oh! You can fall into an earthquake. You can go into the earth.

Earthquake, I'm pretty sure, is tectonic plates, or is that the tsunami? No, that's tectonic plates. Tectonic plates slam, boom, boom, boom, boom. But I'm saying in Cali and stuff like that, and when it's a big earthquake, like, earth cracks open, bro. And stuff can fall. Is someone here? Yeah, did you hear that? I did not. Oh, it scared me. Earth cracks open, and stuff can literally fall in, like a wormhole, or a...

Not a pothole. No, potholes ruin my car. Potholes ruin transmissions. Wormholes ruin souls. What is it called? Not the wormhole. Wormhole's right. It is wormhole? Yeah, because a whirlpool is in the water. Who's talking about water? I was helping you with your answer.

That's the least fearful is earthquakes. Tsunami's gotta be scary as shit. A big wall of water. Tornadoes are pretty damn scary. Run the other way. What if it chases you? Go sideways. Tornadoes aren't allowed to get off the road or get on the road. They have rules and regulations. There's legislation for earthquakes.

There's literally a tornado master that said, hey, don't touch that concrete. I'm so serious. Because a lot of them... I don't think that's true, Cam. Dog, I'm so serious. If you ever see a tornado by a highway, it doesn't cross it because... Granted, the huge ones, they might say, hey, I'm swole. I don't listen to rules. They might be like a jock. Like a senior jock. Might be the F5. Okay, yeah. But the regular... It's peaking in high school. The F2s are like the sophomores. They get good grades and go to school. Okay, yeah.

Apparently, it's like the dust and the earth is what... It's something to do with... Some of them are like dust tornadoes. So they literally are thriving because of the ground. So it naturally doesn't leave what's giving it. That didn't make sense at all. That absolutely made no sense. So, F5. I want to talk about protocols for emergency situations. And I think half of them are bullshit. Oh, God.

Think about school, right? Remember in school, there would be a tornado drill? I'm not ducking my head. I'm not going under a desk and ducking my head. If I hear there's an aggressive...

Human being in our school. There's a perpetrator in the school with some weaponry. I'm not hiding behind the closet. At all. I'm leaving. I'm going home. I'm running out and going home. If they have a militia outside, oopsie daisy on me. It's my time to go. It's my time to go. God's calling. It's a clear calling. I answered. Especially in my high school, I lived like a three and a half minute sprint from my school. You can make that with a drill in. I would literally...

I'd be so gone. Actually, that's not what they did for tornadoes. They didn't tell you to go under the desk. Did they do that for y'all too? They had you go in the hallway, duck your head, get a spanking. And duck your head on the locker. Yeah. What did you say? Everybody would line up on the... You went in the locker? No, no, no. You'd line up on the lockers and you put your head towards the locker. Yes. And you were tooted out. And I was like, this... Yeah, and I was like, I don't want to toot my ass for some wind. Yeah, I saw that. What the hell? I was sitting here like, you sick teachers. Are you okay?

Oh, I think I pressed my head hard on the ground. Oh, God. And there again, see, that's why we don't do that. Oh, that was not the best. Ooh. Go ahead. But my thing is, even when it's a drill, what are these teachers doing? Have you ever thought about that? What do you mean? What do they do when you got 600 asses up in the air?

They're a part of the ass. 600 prepubescent asses. Oh, no, they weren't. That's a 600 first ass. At my school. They are not 601. At my school, they got a clipboard. What are you, grading? Bro, but that's for the trial. And the real thing, they'd get down. So why don't they have to do it? Because they're adults and their minds are developed.

Ours aren't. We're kids. So you've never thought about that? No. Me and all my loyal friends have our asses up in the air and our heads down. And there's a teacher behind us taking roll? Yeah. Looking at my Wranglers? The You Should Know Podcast.

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That's L-E-C-T-R-I-C-E-Bikes.com. Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. All right, back to natural disasters real quick. Last thing. Did I ever tell you about my family reunion? No. I didn't know white people had family reunions. Not to be partial. It's just I'm learning something new. Y'all have those? You didn't know...

Caucasian descent had family reunions. Y'all have matching t-shirts too? Well, no. Okay. We don't wear the matching t-shirts with the name tags, but we just show up. No, we didn't have name tags. We had like heart and family reunion in like graffiti print. In graffiti? Be careful your next words.

In graffiti. I love it. I didn't know white people had those. That's sick. Congrats. What kind of music did y'all play? Oh, I know. The Cupid Shuffle. YMCA. Oh, we're not dancing? Y'all didn't have music at the Family Reunion? It literally was like a big-ass potluck. Everyone just brought food and we just ate and left. Wait. Wait. So what was the food? Y'all brought sliced sandwiches and deli meat? There was.

Hey, keep going, keep going. Keep guessing. Like, just be funny and keep guessing with white foods. I'm going to tell you if it was there or not. Okay, did you have, was it like a charcuterie board? Like, what did y'all bring? That's a newer thing. That's a newer thing. Like, okay, what are the drinks? Like, would y'all have water? Cola? Sweet tea?

Yes or no, was there pizza? No, y'all did not. There was boxed pizza. Y'all had pizza. Y'all catered pizza to a family reunion. We had catered pizza and Kroger chicken. I swear to God. So no one put their elbow in a plate. There was not many elbows in pots. No one put their foot in a plate. Uncle makes some good fish.

Oh, we had fish at a family reunion? Oh, we had it all. Was he cooking it at the family reunion? Yes, yes. Okay, I was about to say. Cooking it right there. It was catfish. It was fire. We had catfish, pizza, coleslaw, grapes, sweet tea, cookies, brownies, lasagna, chicken salad. It was an absolute turmoil of your internals. Was that a family reunion or a clan meeting?

Liv went to one. Liv went to one. She was like this. She's like, where's the brisket? And all of a sudden, there's a 90-year-old woman coming up. Hey, sweetie, what's your name? And Liv was like, ah! Oh, yeah. No. We had bathrooms there. We rented out a hall in a state park.

And we... You want us to go on? If I didn't know this, it does sound like a Quentin meeting. It really does. We went to a state park, rented out a certain building. We all met at a secret location and we all brought food and talked. And none of us could see each other's faces. Yeah. Yeah. We were all masked. It was a dark room. No, but it... Holy hell, that's so funny. Yeah, I didn't know why you had those. I should have gotten them. So is that like...

I'm not saying this for any of you, so y'all don't do this, but is that like a traditionally like a black thing? I didn't know. Or not even black, but like non-white? Just all of my white friends growing up. They didn't have one? I never heard them talking about one. How often were y'all? Oh, my family didn't have them. Oh, damn. You've never been to a family reunion? I don't think so. Damn. We had ours every year. I'm like, I thought this was like a half decade thing. Like every five, we'd pull up and be like, hey, oh, you have a kid now. It's like, hey, still working there? Yep.

I'm still in school, yep. Good to see you. And I didn't know, one of the magics for me, like going to high school, like my biggest motivation was when I come back to high school reunions, I'm going to bring a Lambo and I'm going to stun on everybody. But I thought it was at the high school, sponsored by the high school. I didn't know it was Jerry from physics class saying, hey, we're going to meet at this bar at 7. I'm not going to this bar with Jerry. So one thing, okay, another thing about my school, they do it at the lake. So it's pretty lit.

It's dangerous. Dangerous, but they do it at the lake. They, again, rent a pavilion. A lot of pavilion rentals. They rent a pavilion. There's sand, beach volleyball, lakes, grills. Everyone pulls up. So I can't wait for mine, too, because I'm going to show off my beautiful little wife. Oh, I'm not going to mine. I thought you just said you were excited. I was excited because I thought it was a school-sponsored thing. What the hell does that change? Because I thought it was, like, real. That gives, like, great value. You know what I mean? Yeah.

That gives five and below. You know what I mean? Nothing wrong with five and below. I've got a lot of basketballs there. Oh, my God. A five and below basketball? To play outside if you needed one quickly. Fuck. Sorry. That's horrible. I didn't grow up with Miss Me jeans. Stop it. Stop it. Miss Me. Kim, you look real good in some Miss Me jeans.

My wife. So at the family reunion though, back to natural disasters. I had this thought while I was lotioning my naked body, by the way. Swear to God, true fact. She's in a video next to it. Nope. Lotioning my naked body and I don't know why. That sounds crazy, but I was thinking about this.

Long story short, my older cousins, they were in their mid-20s when I was like 11. Okay. So they take me. They're like, all right, we're going to do this thing, whatever. I'm like hyped up. They're like, we're just going to run on this path. It's going to be fun and explore. Okay? Okay. So we're running. We're in the state park. We're running. I'm like 15 feet behind. And out of nowhere, he busts a hard left. So I'm running. And I kind of curve my left, right? Can't see because there's wilderness. The second we curve that left, 25-foot drop on a shore, straight rocks. Oh, shit. And I literally went...

I cried the first time. No, you didn't. How old were you? I was young. I was like eight or nine. I sat there and cried, and I was like, holy shit, I could have just died. What are you doing? So, well, what I thought of, in my mind, I said, if I would have fell, I think my cousin would have saved me, hopefully. How old was your cousin? He was like in his 20s. Oh, yeah, he should have. But I'm saying if he couldn't catch me, if he didn't have the physical capabilities, he'd be done. Okay. So then I immediately thought, if we were ever in a dire situation like that,

I don't think you could save me. If you fell off a cliff, you don't think I could save you? I don't think you could save me. Why? Your hands are too damn soft. Your hands are too damn soft. You naturally don't run on a lot of adrenaline. Like, your will would be there, but your capability wouldn't. No.

Yes! The only problem I would have is my physical, because you're heavy. Yeah. You're big girl. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Can you hold big girl with soft hands? Yeah, what I would do is, I have a plan for it. Let's hear it. What is your plan to save my life if we had to? I would be like this. Bitch, get down. Get down? More like die. This is 25 feet of boulders and rocks. I'd be like, now I get ruby.

Oh, I'm taking Ruby. I'm taking Ruby. You sick creep! What the hell? Oh, I'm taking Ruby with me. I'm haunting her ass if you do it. You'd haunt your dog? If you killed me and I heard... I didn't kill you. As I'm falling to my descent, I hear, now I get Ruby. Yeah, I'm gonna die. I'm gonna go up there. Hopefully I get into the gate. I'm gonna say, hey, I got one more thing. If you don't mind it. Mr. Jesus. I'm gonna go creep this dog out real quick. I'm gonna screw with her little crooked legs. And then you'd get her, right? Yeah. And then you'd wake up one day and she'd be like this.

And that'd be it. I would possess my dog. No, genuinely, what I would do to save you, I would try. I would hope so. Well, now that you're saying that, die for all I care. No, no, no. I'm just saying it was like a harsh reality. I was like, damn, if I was hanging off a cliff...

I really don't know if Pete can get me up. That's so... You know whenever I do have adrenaline... You become Mark Henry. I have super human strength. Yes. So I would, but I really wouldn't with you. I'd be like, nah. You look crazy right now, dog. That's what I would think. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You put on your story before you save me. Oh, my God. You pull out a device and capture the moment while I'm struggling. Fingernails in granite. Not granite. Gravel. Just sitting there...

You're like this. You leave like this. Hey, dog. Hey, guys. Make sure you welcome back. Come back. I'm like, mother. Like, I'd literally be screaming for my life. Okay, let me get this from a snap. Yeah, that would be. That's what happened. No. Okay. I take it. I didn't take into account adrenaline. You get very feisty.

You get feisty sometimes. No, what I would do is I would hold you with one hand, right? I would just hold you with one hand with all my will. And then I would use the phone and I would call somebody who could help you. And then if you don't have the mental fortitude and physical strength to stay up on there, that's divine timing. That's natural. You think my whole body gripping onto your one hand, you're going to be able to be like this? Yeah.

Hey man, I'm kind of in a... Matter of fact, this is what you do. Oh my God! The story is unfolding in front of me. You don't like being rattled in front of others. No, no, I hate it. So instead of like, come to the cliff, this would be you. I'd be like, alright bro, I got you, I got you. Just hold on, I'm calling right now. Hey man, so I'm kind of helping my guy on this cliff right now, right?

Hold on, I'll put you on mute. Just keep going! Stop moving, Cam! Stop! Alright, man. Mind coming up to the shoreline and helping us out? And your arm would be, it'd be like bloodshot and killing me and everything. I'm screaming and you try to be calm because you hate anxious scenarios. That's such a good one. I hate like showing that I'm like frantic. That you're frantic and flustered because normally in real life you just leave.

Whatever the scenario is, you just go, nah. That's a good point. Because when I, like a couple months ago, when I opened my living room window and I looked out of it and I saw my neighbor tied up with duct tape outside and she was screaming, I called the cops, obviously, because I was like, that shouldn't be there. That can't be happening right now. This is my 911 call. Oh, my God. I swear to God. And she's okay. I followed up. She's fine, I think. God bless her. Yeah, God bless her. I called 911 and I said, excuse me.

They said, 911, what was your emergency? And I was panicked. There's no such emergency. I've never seen someone tied up before, so I was panicking. So I was like, excuse me. Yeah, I'm at my house right now, and I was watching Breaking Bad because I was.

You're shitting me. No, because I was watching Breaking Bad and I couldn't tell if that was my first time ever watching it. It was episode one. Oh my God, he thought it was a skit. He thought it was a problem. I thought it was a part of the show. I was hearing screaming, but I was like, they're in the bedroom right now. There shouldn't be no screaming in this scene. And so I paused and I still heard the screaming. And so then I opened my window and I saw the lady tied up screaming outside in the thing.

Why does the officer or the line guy need to know that? Probably didn't, but I had to get that out because I was so nervous. I didn't want them to know that I was rattled. So I said, hey, excuse me. I was watching Breaking Bad, and I heard screaming. I thought it was a part of the show. It wasn't. I'm looking out my window right now, and there's a woman tied up screaming duct tape. And they're like, where are you? And I said, oh, I'm at home. Because I thought they could just track this shit. I didn't know they needed everything. I got to do your job for you, too?

You want me to drive the police car down here? He goes, oh, I'm just at the crib, man. I'm in the living room chilling. He's like, sir, what's the location? You're like, dude, I mean, you want the city? They're like, is she going to die? You're like, I don't know, man. Ten seconds ago, I thought she was in the show. This is what it should have been. Yeah. Hey, man, there's a screaming lady duct taped outside my window. I meant to blank, blank, blankety, blank, blank, blank. Come here now. I don't know if she's going to live or die. But that's not true, though. I would assume she was going to be alive. You don't know if I'm going to live or die right now.

What are you, Nostradamus? You have a magic ball? No, but if you use cognitive thinking, you know. So you can sense if someone's going to get a heart attack. You can look at what situation you're in. Oh, no, heart attack, no. Knocking wood, that's what. Exactly. No. It's not wood. No, but you can normally. But like right now, I would be very surprised if you croaked. Exactly. You'd be surprised, but you don't know. You said you know. Yeah. You would hope. You assume. Yeah. Assuming makes a what? World go round.

Ass you me. You know what? Because of what you just did, I was thinking of this as well. I want to play a game with you. I want to play a game. All your games that involve me, it ends up with me being embarrassed. So go ahead. I want to play a game. Finish that saying. Finish that jingle. You know I don't know shit like this. Let's try it out. I don't know much jingles. I'm going to start you with some easy ones. I'm going to start you with some easy ones. Wait. If they're a Christmas jingle, I might get them.

I have nothing in the holidays. I didn't know there was jingles outside of the holidays. Like commercial jingles. Yes! Oh. Those are tunes. You thought it was... It's in here. Here we go. Finish that saying. It's always darkest before... That's a real one? What are you saying? Start me off with some easy shit. Give me confidence to go. Alright, twos a company, threes a party. Sorry, CJ.

Twos company, threes a... Gathering. Crowd. Crowd is the answer. So say it fully. Twos a company, threes a crowd. Twos company, threes a crowd. Say ones that aren't at your white family reunion. No news is... Good news. There you go. There we go. Don't bite the hand that... Feeds you. There you go. Okay, better late than... Never. So now that you got some warm ones, here we go. Let's do it. A bird in the hand is...

Cam, dog, a bird in the hand is a bird in your f***ing hand. I don't know. What do you want? What do you want from me? Take a guess. Honestly, God, say you were the guy. You were the philosopher writing on stone, right? Writing in your journal. You're the guy writing this. What would you finish that? What would it be? A bird in the hand. A bird in the hand is...

Oh, I can think of something here. Then I'll tell you what it actually is. A bird in the hand is a crowd... A bird in the hand is a hen in the... A bird in the crowd... I have something good. A bird in the hand is a home for all. A bird in hand is better than the one in the bush. Now explain to me what that means now. I don't know. Here's another easy one. Okay, here's easy. Maybe not. Okay. You can't teach an old dog new tricks. There you go. Okay.

When there's smoke, there's fire. There you go. That's easy. That's simple math. He who laughs first. It literally goes to Latin. I'm like, speaking of smoke. He who laughs first. Cries last. Close. No cigar. Laughs last. I don't understand. He's a long laugher. Guy has wind pipes on him. Who says these? All good things must come to an end. There you go.

Early bird gets the worm. Here we go. Every time. Beggars can't be choosers. It's expensive. I paid a lot. It was expensive. I paid money. What's the expression though? You paid what? Something so expensive. They took a chunk. They took a bag. They took a mine. It's expensive. I paid an arm and a leg.

No, give it to me. No, since you want to. No, no, no. Redemption from last week. Don't count your chickens before they hatch. There you go. Don't judge a book by its cover. Don't put all your eggs in one basket. There you go. Good things come to those who wait. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. If you can't beat them, choose them. Wait, join them. If you want something done right, do it yourself. There you go. Keep your friends close and your enemies close. Here we go. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. Let's keep going.

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Boy, you're going crazy. Don't put all your eggs. I already said that. Don't judge a book by its. You already said that. Damn it. Don't count. Don't count your chickens before. You already said that. Oh, he's like, are you rereading what you already said? If you play with fire, you're going to get burned like father, like son. No man is greater than God. Amen. But I actually don't get this one at all. No man is an island.

No, no, no. Put your phone away. Put your phone away because you tried to... Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I have one more for you. Okay, go ahead. We're going to pivot that. Okay. That was fantastic. Thank you for participating. I did pretty good that one. Round of applause for Peyton. Round of applause for Peyton. Thank you. Thank you. Instead of finish the saying, we're going to go guess the jingle.

Okay. Guess the hum. I'm going to give you a hums. You got to guess it. These are world-renowned hums. Don't do hums. Can I get like the ending of the jingle? Because hums, I have a sensory problem. AutoZone. O'Reilly's. Yeah, I'm not going to be able to do this. I don't know. Red Robin. Can we say something that didn't get foreclosed in 2012? I had a good time at Red Robin one time. Mm-mm.

Nah, I can't do this. I don't know this. Goldfish. Yes! Yes! CJ gave it to me. No! Oh! Why? All right. I got to look you in the eyes. Bro, what are you saying? You're saying a whole damn theme song. No, I'm not going to be able to do this. It's a pillow. It's a pet. It's a pillow pet.

You knew that? What the f***? Okay, one more. 1-800. I need my cash now. Is that right? Call JG Wentworth. 877-CASH-NOW. Can I tell you this story? Sorry. Last one. It's bothering me. I actually don't know if this is not cool, but it's a blank. You're in good hands. All state. There we go. She said state farm.

The You Should Know Podcast. This episode of the You Should Know Podcast is brought to you by Kleenex Ultra Soft Tissues, your ally to help tackle your allergy symptoms this season. I'm not sure if you've noticed, P. What's up? I've been real sniffly, right? Definitely, definitely we're in allergy season. We are. I had bad drainage earlier. Remember when I was dizzy and sneezing a lot? It was bad. You almost vomited.

But guess what? What? Kleenex cleaned me up. I usually love spring, but I struggle with very, very bad allergies. I usually love spring, but struggle with allergies which aren't the most fun. Facts. Luckily, with Kleenex Ultra Soft Tissues, I can say bring on the blooms and face allergies head on. Kleenex Ultra Soft Tissues are hypoallergenic and allergist approved, so you can attack watery eyes and battle runny noses without worrying about irritating your skin. You know I got sensitive skin syndrome. You have very sensitive skin.

Don't have to worry with Kleenex. We are obsessed with Kleenex. They are so, so soft. It feels like a little blanket infused with lotion. A little nose kiss. A little nose puppy blanket. I loved it. So good. For this allergy season, grab Kleenex and face allergies head on. Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. So I was driving the other day, right? Okay. And there was a car wreck off to the side and I cried because I saw somebody's fake leg on the ground. I have a very important question.

I wanted to have a very important quest. I want to remember this. And I cried. Were your tears of sadness or of laughter? It was sadness and confusion. I'm not a... No, I was like, how'd they get home? Okay. And I'm not... It genuinely made me... I'm crying now. It genuinely f***ed me up, man. Wait, wait, no, no. Because imagine them like... Why didn't EMS pick that leg up for him, dog? Like, that shit bothered me for days.

Because there's a wreck, right? And there was like, and obviously the people that were involved in the wreck are gone. Like they got, they went home or something. And there was left with street team picking up like all the bumpers and shit off the ground. And then I saw them sweeping a leg. And I said, why did they give the leg back? And it f***ed me up, bro. Peyton, it was the worst day. I can't, I, I, oh my God. I can't.

I can't even ask. I can't ask. Ask me. Hey, T.J., what kind of a tiger is that? How would you get home if it was you? I'm sorry. I know, I feel like

I took everything in me not to get up and give my best skin. No, and I hope people are going to probably clip that and then some people are going to be like, oh, he's making fun. But no, it was genuinely like a sadness thing. And I said, whoever was in charge of that scene belongs in hell for not giving that lady or man their leg. I've seen people get their golf clubs out of their trunk before driving off. That's a limb. Why did they not give it back? Why didn't they ask for it?

Why didn't they say, hey, get my leg? That's my leg. I need my leg. In the crash. It's not a backpack. It's my... Oh, there it is. It could be that. What? He said insurance. Oh. Okay. People are going to be like, probably because they might have died, but they didn't. Because I could tell by the crash, it was like a bumper to bumper thing. Like a fender bender. Like a...

Like, not bumper to bumper, but like a fender bender. No, I know what you're saying. Where the back was just a little concaved and it fell off. And I guess it had a leg in the trunk. Okay. See, if it's a trunk leg, that's fine. Maybe. That's what I'm hoping. So it makes me less sad. I originally, when you said that, I'm like, their leg came off in a fender bender. I was like, we got to move on. We got to move on. We're playing with fire. We got to move on. Since you always want to give me quizzes. Mm-hmm.

Oh, I'm gonna give you a quiz. Oh, and this has nothing to do with stuff that doesn't matter. Like you always quiz me. I already said my mom told me at a young age. I have a lot of useless knowledge, but I want to quiz you on me a quiz on you. Oh, how the turntables have turned because how well do you think you know me?

Six out of ten. Okay. I'm just kidding. Well, I would say I know you. Oh, but I know you, you little... Oh, you little meticulous little... You little fly. You little bee. I know you ten out of ten. Okay. You actually, on this episode, you said, I tell you my deepest and darkest. I do. So, these questions are... Did you formulate this? Or are these...

internet questions that you have the answers to they're mine oh they're mine i know you're meticulous you're gonna be like what shirt was i wearing in my third grade yearbook photograph after i ate quaker oats and went to school they're gonna be unbelievably things that you know you have not told me i'm gonna start it off easy i'm gonna give you my god's honest honest work and truth start it off easy what's my favorite color

Be careful. What does that mean? Look at your fit! That's because I have sweating problems, and you should know that. Me too. No, my favorite color is red. I know your real favorite. You didn't say it. No, you only get one. That was a joke. You only get one. Scouts honor. Whatever it is. I knew it was red. I was going to say red. I made the joke of black. What's my favorite flavor of ice cream? God, you're lactose, so you don't really like a lot, but when you do...

Is it homemade vanilla? Yeah. Thanks. I had it down to two, but... What was the name of my first YouTube video ever? Grandma's Making Cookies. Nope. Close, though. It was Grandma's Cookies. So I'll give it to you. Yeah. I added a word. Sorry. That's good. What was the name of my pet turtle? Oh, my God. Melvin. No. What was it? It wasn't Melvin. Hold on. This is a very intimate part of my life because I saw a massacre with this turtle. You did. You did. It was murdered. Not Melvin. Melvin.

Francis. No, Jaws. You named a turtle Jaws? Yeah.

What the hell were you saying? Because they were murdering turtles. They would eat each other in the tin. We put them in this. You had multiple murdering turtles. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You had a turtle ring going. You were taking bookie bets on the side. You said, I got the smaller one. Take down the big guy. You were taking bets. No, it wasn't that. It was just so we went to Corpus Christi as kids, right? With my family. And there was like this, you know, they have the gift shops on the beach.

with all the towels hanging up cool towels and like in the blankets in the blankets yes yeah and then they had turtles over there like little bitty bitty baby ass turtles and my mom was like you can get a turtle because she thought it was like it like gonna stay it was gonna die soon oh like the we'll flush them what are the little shits with the shell that you paint on them hermit crabs those die like that you know i mean she thought i was getting another hermit crab didn't so these these these uh what did they call turtles grew to exponential size so quick show me how big

It ended up getting about this big. It was a massive-ass turtle. Oh, I know. Your mom was not messing with that. We got four of them. Oh, my God. They were playing duos. They were going tag team. We got four of them, right? And so, God rest my grandma's soul. Meemaw, God bless you. She never wanted to give us information that would hurt our feelings. So, one day...

We had the turtles, right? For about a week or something. And they were growing, bro. Fast. And they were already like doubling in size. Yeah, that's... I don't like that. They're all in one tank. Like one little glass tank, right? It wasn't too big, but it was fitting four turtles. Me and my family, we go on this trip out of town somewhere. My grandma was like watching our house or something. Our apartment at the time. She was watching our apartment and she was feeding our turtles. Oh my God. She was feeding them rabbits. And so...

What happened was my grandma walked into the house, the apartment, and she said, she called my mom and she goes, something happened. My mom was like, what? She goes, all the glass on the turtle shell is red. Oh my God. And she goes, there's only one turtle left. Oh my God. They had Hunger Games for real. And so he decapitated all the turtles. Right. And then that's when we named him Jaws. Right.

You should have named the gang as Khan. He was out here slaughtering people. And so my grandma... And slaughtered them like animals. And so my grandma was like, I'll just go drive and go get three new turtles. And my mom was like, no, this is a... Don't worry about it. And my mom was like, this is a learning experience for the boys. She made you go what? No, she didn't make us look at it. Oh my gosh, she's like, you look at your pets. They're like...

No. That head's over here. He's writing with his little paw. He's writing on the glass. Don't f*** with me. I'm Jaws. He hits a turtle flex. He's like this. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, no. She just said we need to not hide things from them and tell them what happened. And so they told me and I cried. And I was like, I hate Jaws. I hate him. Dude, I cried.

And then two weeks later, I saw my grandma's cat. We went to her house. I saw it get hit by an 18-wheeler. I'm glad you brought up cats because when my cat died of severe liver disease when I was younger, we put her in a copy paper box, cut it into a coffin, and I wrote on it. I said, Rustin, peace out.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You did not take a sandbag cat. Oh, sandbag cat. Oh, yeah. No, no. Dead cat in a box, shaped it into a coffin, dug a whole backyard, put it in there, wrote recipes. Sammy, love you. Cried over it. Replaced dirt. Dead cat. Is that still there? We could go dig Sammy. She said dig Sammy. She said Patreon. We're not digging Sammy up. God, no.

I wrote on Sharpie and I didn't think I was going to cry. Because I told you about the origin story of the cat. It was like my dad's friend passed away. You're not laughing at that. No, you said that at the wrong time. No, you're not laughing at that. No, you said that at the wrong time. No, you're not laughing at that. No, no, no. You cannot be laughing at that. No, you said that at the wrong time. What were you laughing at? You have two seconds. I was having a story about my girlfriend.

Are you sick, Pat? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Three seconds. I have a story about my grandma's dogs in a tree. That's what I was thinking about. Okay. So my dad's friend passed away. Stop. No, no, no. That's not okay. No, you're doing that. You're doing that. You're doing that. If I say it one more time and you laugh again, we gotta move on. All right. The origin story from the cat, the reason why I wasn't fully...

I loved her, but it's because my dad's friend passed away. You're crying right now. I can't do this. My dad's friend passed away. He took the cat. The cat became ours, so it was time to bury her. I was like, I really don't think I'm going to cry that much. That's not what I meant. No, he's going to kill you. That's not what I meant. No, you're definitely not invited for next Sunday dinner. You're not going to be invited. No, I didn't mean it like that. I was thinking it was a bad timing. No, yeah, I get it. So he passed, right? I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Oh, you already said it? What? You already finished the story? Yeah. Okay. Couldn't hear me through your undeniable laughter. No, because I, uh, Mike, I'm saying, let me get this off so people don't cancel me and Mike doesn't hate me. Yes. My, my grand, my grandparents always had a collection of Shih Tzus. Like,

Like, one would die. What did you just say? Shih Tzus. No, the first thing. My grandparents had a collection of Shih Tzus. I thought you said clutch. I thought you said my grandparents had a clutch and a Shih Tzu. Oh, so like they took the head and put it on the thing? No, I was thinking you were talking cars and cats or cars and dogs. No, no, they had a Shih Tzu, right? His name was Joey. Joey died. They got a new dog, died. New Shih Tzu died. We got three dead Shih Tzus at the grandma residence. It's a Shih Tzu grave. Exactly. So they had this big ass tree in the back. Oh, no. And they would die.

dig holes and that was like the cemetery for the shih tzu that was a shih tzu cemetery and so i dig holes and i guess there were shallow graves and so they put them on there and then if you walk by that tree that shit stuck like ass you step you step on one too quick you feel a claw it was like what the it's too far this is too far yeah to hell with dead pets it's too far sad things go back to the quiz the you should know podcast

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Are we gonna get back into this game because we just we wait I was smoking boots on the quiz Okay, I'm about to get a little harder now. All right, get a little harder get a little harder now. All right, here we go Here we go. Here we go. All right, Pete Jaws What am I most afraid of? Oh god, are we talking like deep or like surface though? What am I most afraid of most afraid of eternal loneliness? I'd live in my loneliness. I know i'd say you're most afraid surface level snakes deep stuff

Having to work a corporate job. A regular job. A regular job. No, that cripples you to your core. Okay, those are two good ones. Snakes is good. Snakes is good. I would have said snakes and ostriches. Ostriches. I knew it was ostriches. Damn it, ostriches. If I was lost...

Where is one place you know you could find me? McDonald's. Absolutely. McDonald's, without a doubt. You'd literally be like, I don't know where the hell I am, but where's Ronald? He'll bring me some happiness. They have Wi-Fi and I'll be good. You think if I was lost, I would go to McDonald's? You would 100% go to McDonald's. No, I would not. You would think it's safe? Can. You wouldn't go to a warehouse or a lost open field? No, I'm a smart guy. As much as you think I'm dumb, I'm a smart guy. What are you going to go to? A hospital? No. Fire department.

It's where they put lost babies, right? You mean to tell... You don't even know. I feel like you don't even know what a fire department looks like. Yes, I do. Because I used to want to be a fireman. You used to want to be a fireman. Because I was obsessed with LazyTown.

And I, and I, you know, that was the shit. And so, you know how like you used to jump off the thing to get started on the day. I was, I was going to skip the part where you slide down the pole. Cause I didn't want to be a stripper. I wanted to be an extra athlete. And so I was going to, I was going to jump off the stairs and land and put on my boots. You did not want to be a firefighter and you would not go to a fire station. I would be a great firefighter. I would, I would, what? I would be a fantastic firefighter. You don't, okay. You don't give me credit for shit, Cam. I would be okay. Firefighter. I'll bring back. Okay. You wouldn't, uh,

A fantastic five. How much does all the equipment weigh, do you think? 30 pounds, 50 pounds, 100 pounds. Round that. Not an old shot.

You think it weighs 30 pounds? 30 pounds is a dumbbell that you're curling in your hand. You think that? You got the whole damn suit, the pack, the boots, the belt, the hose, the belt, the snaps, the thing, everything. Okay, I might not be the quickest firefighter, but I'd be a good one. But that's what, speed is the name of the game. I don't need to be quick to grab a hose and spray some shit. Oh, so you're just the shooter from distance. You're the coward. What else would you need to do? You go.

in the fire and you saved the damsel in distress. Oh, no. And the dog. I'd be like, hey, if you didn't get out in time, dog. I'm the SEAL team firefighter. I'm just hitting with the water. I'm giving you some backup. They're screaming like, help! I'm trying! You're like, this shit's heavy, man! Just keep breathing! That'd be you. That'd be you. You'd be a horrible firefighter. I'd be a pretty good cop. You don't even like sitting in saunas. No, I can't breathe. You're gonna be in a full

No, I'd be one of the firefighters that do fun things like take cats out of trees. So, I was gonna, no offense to your profession, I was gonna say something, I was gonna say the loser firefighters, but no. All firefighters are appreciated. Um, okay. Okay. Okay. A fire department? No, you wouldn't. Cam, I would be a fantastic firefighter. I have great aim.

Great a- So you're the hose guy? Yeah. Say that. Say I'd be a great hose guy. That's a part of the fire department. No. 'Cause what they said, "Harden, you gotta get up in that building and save him!" I'll say, "Two weeks." Two weeks what? "Notice, I'm out!" What the f*ck you talkin' about? You get your ass in there, you can scream at me, you can run in! "Harden, there's someone in there right now, burning! Get in there!" I can't see him, you see him fine, go get him then! What the f*ck you talkin' about? So why you gettin' onto me? You go save him! You don't wanna see him, right? Oh yeah, you'd be in a civil lawsuit like that. Like that.

Okay. I have one hour to spend $5,000. Where would I go? North Park Mall. But more specifically, you'd go to Neiman Marcus. No, that's not true. That's 100% true. You'd go to Neiman Marcus, Eastman Jewelers, or Louis Vuitton. That's where you'd go. One of the three, if not all three, and all the money spent within, I'd give you 30 minutes. 100%. You'd go to Neiman, you'd grab two pairs of sneaks, you're sitting at about two bands. No. You'd go to Eastman, or you'd go straight to Eastman Jewelers.

There's not much I can get at Eastman Jewelers for $5,000. Yeah. Uh, you... Okay, take out Eastman Jewelers. You'd go to Louis Vuitton. No. You don't think I would really give it to my family? You don't think I'm that type of guy? That's not spending. That is spending it. Giving money to your family is spending money? Yes. Give it... It's literally giving the money. To spend is transactional. I am transactioning. What are you getting? Their happiness.

Their gratitude. What, are you putting in a bottle, you little creep? No, but if I give you $5,000, the return is a good feeling for me. You didn't spend money. You just gave it away. What's the difference? You have to give something in return to spend money? No. That's what spending is. So if you go to a strip club, right, and you're throwing $5,000, did I just spend $5,000? No, you gave $5,000.

Or you spent it on her abilities to strip. And I'm spending it on the ability for you to smile, pay off some bills. No, no, no, no. That's not spending money. You can't convince me. That's not spending money. Spending money. Spending money is just giving money out. No, it's not. It's taking money from your personal account and giving it somewhere else. So if you drop, if a $20 bill falls out of your pocket. No. You drop it. No, it's the willfulness to give it out is the spend.

That's the loudest door I've ever heard. That is not spending money. That's a transaction is what you're talking about. I'm talking about spending money. That's not spending money. You know I'm right, too. You know I'm right, too. That's not spending money. Giving it, that's not spending. You keep saying that, but there's no explanation. You give money to charity. You don't spend it. That's money spent.

That is money spent. It's literally saying give to charity. You give a charitable donation. You give them your money. And that is money that has been spent. I spent $5,000 on this charity. Gotcha. Just say you're wrong. No. Just say it. You're wrong.

12 year old. You know what? If you give the money to your family, you're not spending the money. Italy said if you had five, if you had an hour to spend $5,000, where would you go? First off, you said your family, you don't go to, you'd go home. You'd go to their house. That's location. You don't know that. You can be anywhere.

So you would go to where they are? Wherever they are. I'd go to my family and spend the fun. See, that proves the point that you like to argue. And you're a dumb sack of shit. You know why? How? Because what movie did you tell me, you and Ryan, what movie did y'all tell me to watch? Oh, I'm so glad this popped in my mind. What movie did y'all tell me to watch at the gym? The Matrix. The Matrix. And you were raving about The Matrix. Bro, you would love The Matrix. It's action-filled. It's so good. It's sci-fi. You would love it. Yes or no, did you tell me to watch The Matrix? Yeah. And you were hyping it up. Great film. Not going to lie.

You didn't like The Matrix? It might have been, I only got halfway through and turned it off. So you're a quitter? Because that was one of the worst things I've ever watched in my life. It's old now. It's an old film. I appreciate old films. You know I do. You're comparing it to 2024 cinematography. No, it's not even that. It was just weird as shit. That's The Matrix. No, not weird in a good way to where like, oh, this is good weird. This is just like weird. Like it started off, it was just quick.

Like, it was just quick as hell for no reason. Like, the first half, they felt like they sped through that story. Yeah. And then all of a sudden, the dude's a gooey baby going through a tunnel in a sewer and falling in the water. And then all of a sudden, he's in a room with two guys that look like he could beat the shit out of just because they wear cool glasses and black suits. And then they put a little sperm spider in his stomach through his belly button, and his mouth is taped shut with skin? What the fuck am I watching?

And then they're giving him red and blue vitamins. Yeah, and then this big black guy with sunglasses that don't even have connected. Like, he has great nose balance. And apparently that guy knows the f*** out of Kung Fu. Like, what the hell am I watching? The Matrix. And who is this Neo guy? I know, but...

Does he not have any self-confidence? Because he just like went and trusted the shit out of this dude. And he was like, yeah, dude, science experience on me. And they shaved his head. They put tubes on him. He had spikes coming out of his body. And he was like, where I'm... And he's going to this lair with a bunch of like degenerate drug dealers. And they're like, hey, the world isn't real. Let me put this semen bug in your belly button.

A semen bug. And they put him in a white room with this little ass TV. If you can do all this science, get a better TV. What are we doing? This TV is from 1912. How about some HD? What the fuck?

Roku? Yeah. Bro, you should totally give movie reviews just like that. Bro, I just, I honestly went like this. I turned it off. Exactly. See, you're not a finisher follower. That's the only movie. I've done that with two. Oh, bullshit. No, I've done it with two movies in my life. Matrix is one, and the second one was a Penguin National Geographic movie when I went with my dad as a kid because I thought I was going to see Happy Feet. And it wasn't Happy Feet, and I was so confused. I was like, who's this British f***er?

talking in the back of this and i was like dad this is not what i wanted the penguin sees his spouse and is approaching with cold wet flippers yeah and i was like dad you're like why aren't they dancing it was traumatized i was so excited and i was like dad this we are like 45 minutes in i was like dad this is not right it's not what i want to watch the penguins often use their beaks to fight off of the male penguins to sensually seduct the women yeah

And my dad goes, my dad goes, my dad literally goes, I don't give a we spent money. You don't watch this most. And I was just like this. Good dad. You're just sitting here. Yeah. And now it's one of my sick movies is matrix. The movies that when I turn on, I get gaggy. Like there's certain things as well. Like smells like a gaggy movies. I get gaggy. That's a gaggy movie. You know what I mean?

I have gaggy things. Gaggy movie. The Matrix, there's three installments. I know. You must watch from start of one to the end of three. Dude, I don't know how I'm going to make it to that first one. What if High School Musical never made a two and three? Don't you ever compare those two. That is not right. Yes, it is.

High School Musical is a way better movie than The Matrix. Way better, but Matrix is way more world-renowned. So you agree that High School Musical is a better movie than The Matrix? For me personally, no shot. What about Matrix is better other than Hyperion? I don't care about a kid with a nice haircut that's going through summer, plays basketball. He had a very tough decision to make.

What was his decision? Did he get a semen baby put through his... Did he get a semen baby and his belly button was spiked? No, but... Did he have to choose red or blue pill? Yes, he did have to choose red or blue pill. He had to choose. Did he want to go to Juilliard on a scholarship or go to play basketball on a scholarship?

That's a tough decision. What would you pick? Juilliard. Probably Juilliard. And his girlfriend was going, and she went into Harvard early. It's a high school relationship. It meant something. She's going to go to Harvard, have a tutoring session with a guy with the last name of Jefferson, and then forget him. That's it. Done. You've never had high school love. See ya. Thought I did. Yeah, until the basketball team showed up. That is very foul. The You Should Know Podcast.

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Alright, so the other day, again, on my timeline popped up a record, right? It's a very strange record. Okay. So me being me, useless knowledge, I click the link, I end up on a page 23 of the world's most weirdest world records. That's a lot of W's. That's a lot of alliteration. World's most weirdest world records. Okay. I want to say something. Okay. I want you to guess, and then I'm going to ask you a question. Guess what? You'll see. Okay.

The world record for the most Big Macs consumed in a lifetime. Oh my God. Belongs to Donald A. Gorsk. How many Big Macs do you think he consumed? In a year? Lifetime. Oh, in a lifetime? Yeah. So there's 365 days. So how long did he live? The record here, we'll say 40 years. 14,000.

He registered his 26,000th McDonald's Big Mac. 26,000 McDonald's Big Macs. I'm gonna say that again. He consumed 26,000 Big Macs. His sweat smelled like piss. He had jaundice at that point. His livers were screaming for help. Okay. Holy shit.

What do you think the most apples held in one's mouth and then cut by a chainsaw in under one minute is? Whoever that is, I need to meet them and see what they do in their off time and if I can participate. And the person who holds the record, his name is Johnny Strange. Maybe not anymore. I don't want anything Johnny in their mouth. How many apples did he hold in his mouth and it was cut by a chainsaw in under a minute? If he had more than eight, I'd be surprised. What does that mean? He was cut by a chainsaw. Like they decapitated Johnny? What?

I don't know. Okay. The answer's eight. You got it right on there. Okay, thank you. I was going to say, if he fits more than eight in his mouth, I might have to have a conversation with Johnny and see if you can make my Friday nights a little better. Which British man holds the world record for the stretchiest skin? Ruby. His name's Gary Turner. Okay. How far, the skin on his stomach, how far do you think it can stretch out? If it's more than a foot, we got to talk. Six and a half inches. Six and a half inches going. Of skin? That doesn't seem like too much. Pull your stomach right now.

I'm going to guess you get a whopping half an inch. Oh, my chest pimple is gone. It fell off. My chest pimple fell off. What do you mean it fell off? I've had this pimple in the middle of my chest for like three years. And I've always touched it like that. And it finally fell off. Maybe it's not a pimple. You had a pimple for three years. You had a pimple for a thousand calendar days. Yeah, but you ever get attached to things?

And you're like, that's, we want to stick around for a while. We are one. Like I have a cup in my drawer that's got like, it's like crusted a little mildew at the bottom, but I've had it since like high school. So I'm going to keep that. It's from Bucky's. It's the same shit with that pen over there. Don't talk about my pen. Yeah, the chest pimple, but let's see if I'm a skincare. Oh, six inches is a lot. Yeah, that's a lot. You got about a quarter of an inch. You went and it was done. All right. Give me one more. One more.

Most piercings in a lifetime. I've seen that. Her first piercing, this is Elaine Davidson. First piercing, 1997. She called it quits in 2006. Nine years of piercings. How many piercings do you think she got? 250. 4,225. Holy shit, man.

We're at 4,225. Imagine her going through TSA airports. She's like, she's getting pat down, rubbed down, scanned, x-rayed. What's that song by Kesha with the bomb? Hips don't lie. No, Kesha. That's Kesha. Like dynamite. What's that song? Adele? No, shut up. Kesha. It's a song about bomb.

This place about to blow. I sang that in the airport. I sang that in the airport, and boy, did my stomach go to my ass. This place about to blow. Freeze me. It's a dead end.

You're sitting there in this place. Oh, my God. Is it bad if you get a little blood flow during a TSA check? If you get a blood flow during a TSA check, you deserve to be bit by the dog that's on duty. 100%. There's no way. I'm not saying I did. That reminds me of your question in wrestling. What? So, Peyton, when Gabe won his wrestling national championship, Peyton was live streaming it from the house, and he was texting me because he's never watched wrestling. You were texting me. Yeah. This man straight up said,

Both the wrestlers were on the ground. He said, now if one of them stand up and they're bricked up, is that a disqualification? Could you imagine? Why? I think you can. You definitely can. He asked if a wrestler stood up with a bone or some blood flow, is he disqualified? And that is a fair question. That is a very fair question. Another thing, they have a challenge brick. Not break it. They have a challenge. You go, what the fuck?

See, that's one of the reasons I feel like I could do good in a street fight, because I will bite a testicle off. Not saying, like, willingly. I wouldn't want to put my mouth on it. But if I'm losing... You're sitting there... You're just ripping it off. No, that shit is mine now. You go, get off. I'm telling you. Hey, I'm warning you. You just ripped that bitch off. Oh, my God. But they have a challenge brick in wrestling. Like, in the NFL, they have a challenge flag. In wrestling, it's a brick.

He goes, he's texting me. I'm watching, right? The period ends. I check my phone real quick. He goes, who the f*** threw a brick on the mat? And I said, that's the challenge brick. He said, no, I'm not going to lie. Throwing house foundation to ask a question is insane. It should did not make sense to me. New sports is weird. Oh my God. Okay. My question with the record. Okay. What world record? We got to say it in the mic. What world record would you want to be known for? Oh my God. If you could hold, if you had a plaque that said Peyton,

Stefan. Steven. Peyton Steven Harden. World record holder. Blank. What would be your world record? If you could choose it. Oh my god. Longest time not drinking water. And I feel like I could win. Oh my god, let's test that. What do you think you could go? Realistically. Be realistic. And I would make it a specific goal. Like, without drinking water, only drinking Diet Coke, because I could do that. And I would be willing to do it. Okay. Okay.

Longest I think I could genuinely go. Don't, don't, don't. And I'm not gassing. Don't worry about the Coke or whatever. That sounds crazy. Don't worry about the Diet Coke. But longest time you could go without drinking water. But I'll still have liquid in me. Sure. Well, I don't, or should we do no like. No, no, no liquids I wouldn't be able to go long. I have dry mouth syndrome. But like just no water, but I can drink Coke only. I could, I genuinely believe I could go for three months until I get to the point where I'm decaying.

Three months. And it would be an easy three months until that last 31st day. And then I'm like, my piss is brown. Yeah, you're peeing blood at that point. What's the closest to orange you've gotten peeing? I've gotten dark one time. It was dark. You thought it was like ratatouille smelling. No, I thought it was a disease. I thought I was going to have to go get antibiotics.

I don't know what it was. I don't know what was in me. It was like the string on that trash bag. It was bad. Yeah, dude. I don't know. And I still don't know to this day. I mean, I was eating bad at the time, but it was literally... You say closest you got to orange, that shit was orange. No, I'm telling you. I was peeing one time.

I was peeing in a urinal, and as soon as my urine hit the porcelain, it stained it. I swear to God. It was like... No, no. The consistency... No, no. The consistency was like a paint splatter. Like, it wasn't trickling down. It's like... It's just like... It's like... It was like... Imagine you were a clown taking your makeup off in the sink. That's what it looked like in that toilet. Or like the new age artists. They dip the brush and they just go... That's exactly what it was. Like, it was like... My piss was like...

Did you have blockage? And then it like... No, it came out fine. How hard were you peeing? I pee aggressively. I have a horse stream. What does that mean? Because if I don't... If it doesn't fall in the bowl, I gotta like... You know what I mean? So you sit to pee? No, that's weird. Oh, it's falling in the bowl while you're standing. Yeah.

I see ya. It's called length. I can't sit to pee because I'll always poop. That's me too. I kind of like it though. Always clear. It's like a natural cleanse. I happen to have a plan to poop. It's like a cleanse with no pills. Good morning. It's just a good cleanse. Yeah. Okay, so now on the water, what's the longest you think you can go with no liquids? Like no liquids. I'm going to tell you what the record is in the Guinness Book of World Records. The longest I could go without liquids? Realistic now. Realistic. Like no liquids. Two weeks. Two weeks.

I am not believing that for a second. Swallowing liquids or even touching my mouth? What the hell are you saying to me? If I could swish around and spit, I'd be fine for about two weeks. In what world are you going to do that? What...

That's the shit to the beginning of the episode. It's never just a... If I could put it in my mouth and play with myself a little bit and spit it out, I'd be good. No, if I could swish and spit. No, liquid doesn't get to touch your mouth. Oh, four days, five days. That's realistic. Longest ever recorded, 18 days in 1979. No. No, that can't be true. No, because I watched Society of the Snow and them bitches didn't have water for like nine months. They were eating snow.

Which is what? Ice. Which is what? A solid. Which is what? Ice. Solid snow. Which is what? Water. There you go. But they can't drink that. I bet your ass they did. They can't. I bet your ass they did. Nine months. They're just hanging out, living. They ate each other, though. Hey, you want to play tic-tac-toe? No, they're drinking water. They're finding water, for sure. Dude, let's throw a berry. No. I would hate to be stranded in the middle of the ocean with you.

You'd be so- I'd be your only f***ing life source in the middle of the ocean! You should be begging to be stranded with me! If you were in the middle of the ocean, you'd be like this: "Nah!" No, we're on a boat. We're on like a little air- like a little, uh, what's it was called? Like a raft? Yeah, we're on a little raft. You'd be so damn demanding, you wouldn't let me have anything. No, I would not. What would I demand you? You'd be like- you'd be like: "Stop eating! Stop drinking the water!" No shit! It's called rationing. Yeah, but you're making me overthink, which will give me anxiety, which will lower my lifespan.

We're in the middle of the ocean! You have to coddle. No, our lifespan is seven days. That's it. And if we can't figure out how to get out of there, we're done. See, I think I should take control if we were stranded in the middle of the ocean. What would you do? Fish. Oh, you'd fish? Fish. With what, your arm? Are you stupid? You bleed in the water.

Oh my god. You bleed in the water. You bleed in the water. So what? A shark can come up? What are you going to do? You hit a sinmomoa? You're going to pull out a trident and sack him right there? You don't even know how to neutralize sharks.

You smack him in the nasal. You smack a shark in the nose and he's just going to turn belly up. That's how you knock sharks out. And then what are you going to do? You're going to gnaw through his rubber? No, you... Is this raft? Is this an apartment on the water? Is this an apartment on wood? Do you think every shark is a school bus size? There's baby sharks. Oh, you're just going to gnaw through his rubber. No, we're not going to keep him on there. You're going to grab him like a $5 foot long and you're just going to bite into a shark's rib. No, we're not going to keep him on there. We're going to cut him open. What?

What are we gonna cut? Our hands if we need to. Oh, I forgot you have raven nails, you have talons, you're just gonna go and just open a fish. No, we cut them. See, that is my problem with you right there. You think just because we're in this scenario that you have superhuman powers. You still have nasty mangled little fingers and we're in the middle of nothing with nothing. So if I start to freak out, sorry. You're the bitch that has a hard time opening an apple by yourself.

- They don't open apples!

You cut an apple in the middle. If you don't have a knife, you can't f***ing cut an apple. Are you f***ing Ronnie Coleman? Who is that? You grab the bitch and go... And you just bite an apple? You don't know how to open apples without a knife? First off, you don't open an apple. Yes, you f***ing do, Cam. You're pissing me off. You're still an eight-year-old kid. What are you having, slices? I don't have cutlery at my house. You cut your sandwiches into fours, too? You f***ing take an apple and you bite it. No, I can't do that because I have sensitive gums. I have gingivitis. And I'm the bitch. You have gingivitis in the middle of the ocean. You think we have a dentist? You think we have Listerine?

See, you're going to be, oh, where's the help? And I'm just going to be like, shut up! That's what would happen. No. Oh, we would turn on each other so quick in the ocean. All I have to do is push up.

I'm kidding. I would never. No, you know how it lasts longer than you? Oh, my God. You would turn pink in two hours, and you'd be like, I need to turn green. Oh, yeah. That'd be bad. And any time you pissed me off, I would just press into your little white skin. You would just go, shut up. Wham! And I'd be like, oh. Oh, God. Yeah, we wouldn't do good. Oh, my God. We have a guy that can't swim and a guy that's going to be burned in an hour. Golly. We'd have a hard time. That's actually terrifying. Don't talk about that. I've always wanted a sunburn, but I don't.

I've tried to get them because at Schlitterbahn, I didn't get in the water because obvious reasons. That would have been the end of me. That would have been Peyton's last day. Good morning to you. Write the obituary. I read my grandma's obituary online. He was a great son. It made me cry. I didn't know she had one. I was like, damn, she got famous. You read your grandma's obituary? Yeah. Dude, my grandpa's obituary made me cry. Yeah. Because as soon as they said my name, I started crying. What were we talking about? I don't know. Let's get off that, though. We're talking about how shitty it'd be if we were stuck in the ocean. No, I said something else. What did I just say?

Oh, yeah, Slytherin in my sunburn. Oh, it's sunburn. Because I couldn't get in there because I'd die and I'd have an obituary right next to Miriam. So I was like, you know, didn't want that. So I was like, I want a sunburn because everybody is always talking about, oh, my sunburn. And I was like, it can't be that bad. And everybody was saying tattoos feel like a cat scratch on a sunburn. So I was like, I want to know what that feels like. And so I remember I laid out and I didn't put sunscreen on and I just didn't. I can't get a sunburn.

I might get skin cancer. You are a blessed man. You are a blessed man. I made out with a girl on my fifth grade elementary school, like, end of the year party. We had a community pool across the street from my school, and we all went over there, and then we played high school musical on the Ox, and there was a girl. Her name was Abby, and she was looking good. She had scoliosis, I remember. Bro, why do you do that to me? You bastard, bro.

You're such a bad... The transition already caught me. Talk about dead grandparents and stuff. You go, I made out with a girl on my fifth grade field trip. Fifth grade field trip, I brought Bakugan in a backpack. And you're getting tongue swaps. So that already caught me off guard. Okay? Then you're talking about, oh yeah, by the way, she had scoliosis. It was my first time seeing it in person. I was like, that's a question mark.

I'm joking, I'm joking. But she did have scoliosis. But I didn't think of anything of it. I figured out scoliosis was later. And she had it. I have it too now. I think I have a slight, a little smidge. Was the kiss good? Oh, I don't remember. Did she have a good angle? I don't remember. That's f***ing crazy. It's gonna be cancelled. This is a comedy podcast. We say things. We say things. Jokes, don't take them to heart. When did people stop talking fancy?

What? I genuinely don't understand that, right? Old people. You know how back in the old days of America, everybody talked like, thou art now we are here. When did we start talking about, man, that shit lit. When did that transition happen? Damn. I wonder if there was like a moment. Is it when TV came around? What the hell would that have to do with anything? What does that even mean? Was it when they made the ambulance? Like, what are you saying?

There's zero correlation. Hey, when we start talking cool, is it when Cheetos came out? What are you saying? What does TV have to do with it? Because you get to experience more parts of the world and culture starts to come involved. It made sense in my head. First off, I don't even know if that's real.

They're not real, but that's how it worked. When TVs first came out, we definitely were domestic only. There's no shot we were seeing Singapore novellas. Yeah, but there's no way somebody from the Bronx was talking about, Thou art... Or they were like, I got this moncler on. I've got my Timbs, my yutters. No. I bet they were talking like that more. Up there? Oh yeah, probably because they were regal. That's before it turned grimy. Regal? Regal. Good word. Great word. What's the definition? Royal. Royal.

I don't really know what the definition is, but I know what it means. Wasn't there a WWE wrestler, Regal? William. William Regal. Him and LBJ gave me vibes. LBJ gave me, like, get your ass back vibes. I was grazing a sun downtown. Exactly. Holy shit. Okay, that actually... Hold on. I know what it is. I know what it is. No, that's crazy. I tried to not... I tried to not. I think I know what it is. And I'm not being funny. Okay. I swear to God, I'm not being funny. But I think the South...

slavery and stuff like that was, why you're making moans and laughing? Go ahead. Tell me about it. So the Northeast, okay. Northeast, that's where New England in English accents still thou, thou are way about thou are you. Okay. But down South, it was completely different. You had a tons of racist, evil people probably speaking with a lot of hatred. And then you had a bunch of slaves that obvious, obviously they're not from here. So they don't talk like that. Yeah. So maybe it originated there and like,

I don't know how the hell New York, because New York now they're just like, hey, yo, suck my, like, it's crazy. Yeah, my parents are related because of slavery. I think my parents are related. I think so. I can't say that. I can't. No. No, because Preston, my brother, is a history buff. And so he did like the whole family tree shit. And Harden's owned my parents, which were, Harden's owned my mom, which is a Williams. And so they changed it to Harden's. And so I think sometimes that's maybe that's why it's not going right up here.

I think my parents are my cousins. No! That's not a joke, but it's... No, no. I think so. No, bubba. I was like, no wonder y'all get along so well. No. They had family reunions. No wonder Preston has a 17 wide. That is a genetic mistake. My brother's feet should not be there. You should not be six foot with a 17 wide drinking decaf coffee at 9.30 p.m. 40 ounce Coors Light. Yes! Tommy! What?

Preston's gonna f*** it. He's gonna flame my ass. No, I'm gonna get a call from my parents after this. Oh, no, you definitely are. Oh my god. Okay, let's get your wife on. Okay. The You Should Know Podcast.

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Pretty girl, pretty girl, yeah, that's you. Pretty girl, pretty girl, yeah, that's her. Hey, Liv. Hey, P. How are we doing? I'm doing good. Oh, to hell with your husband, huh? You didn't say hey to me. Peyton said, hey, Liv. Yeah, I sure did. I sure as damn well did say pretty girl, you, pretty girl, that's her. Well, you don't have anything in your ears today, so that's a good day. There we go. I'm cleaning them, John. There we go. Wait, you're using Q-tips now? Yes. What is... We'll suck the Q-tip. I'm going to go to the ear. I've learned that's a bad thing to do, suck them. Not bad, but it's strange. It's not a normal thing. Put a dry Q-tip in your ear. Really?

Really? I was always a dry Q-tip guy until she converted me. First time I saw her, dude, she went, what is that? That's got to feel good. My biggest fear is tripping with a Q-tip. Oh, yeah. That's scary. You know what I mean? Oh, my God. You say sneezing while driving? Yeah, that's scary. That is a hell of a fear. That is scary. You know if you sneeze without closing your eyes, your eyes bulge out of your head? I don't know if that's true. I think it is. Yeah. Like Ruby. Ruby.

Yeah, she goes, No, I'm just saying her natural eyes are just out of her school. Oh, bulging. Bulging. Bad. Yeah. What? No. So y'all are in a loving relationship. Yeah. Y'all are married. We are. Congratulations on that. Wonder what love is like. You know what I mean? It's okay. Wow. I'm just kidding. It's great. I can't complain. A lot of relationship TikToks have been popping up on my For You page. Don't know why. I think it's mocking me, the algorithm is. Ugh.

And there is like this couple that have a podcast and they were talking about how much they love each other. And y'all are one of those couples. Oh my God, I love you to death. I love you to death. But there's something that they said that I don't agree with. I'm starting to sweat. A lot of loving couples say this and I don't think I'm nice enough to think this way in a relationship if I've ever gotten one. Okay. I'm starting to sweat. So y'all,

They said when my partner passes away, if something were to happen and my partner passes away, I want them to move on. Oh. As soon as I heard that, I thought to myself, I was like, no, f*** that. I don't think I can ever do that. Would y'all say that? I don't know. I might would have to agree. You agree with not moving on? No, I agree with moving on. So if I die...

You're just going to go grab. No, not necessarily. Okay, first of all, how old were these people? How old were we talking? I would say mid-30s. Okay, well, is there kids involved? No. Let's say there's no kids involved. No kids involved. Shit. You better watch your words carefully. It'll take a while. It'll take a while.

Excuse me. It'll take a while, but I think moving on is a good, it's a healthy thing to do. Man, hell no. If my partner passes, you better not touch nobody. You better die sad. By yourself and just be depressed forever and never be able to look again. You don't have to be depressed. It's not like you cheated and we broke or we separated for those reasons. We are not together because you are now gone. Yeah. So I feel like it's okay to move on from that. But you know what they said whenever we married?

Till death do us part. Yeah. Death took me. Now you just gotta wait. So you could just sit there and just sulk by yourself. No. If I passed away. I'm not gonna lie. If you died, I don't even think I would look at a woman for a long time. I agree with that. I didn't

Quickly. Quickly. I said, but I would, if I were to pass, I would want you. God, this is sad. Or the next person that you're with. I would want them to make you happy. Hey, you're a better person than me. Because. You're saying hell no? Suffer. Sorry. That's not. Suffer? What do you mean suffer? Like, that's not. No, I don't want you. That's not healthy. I don't want you to suffer, but come on. But honestly. I'm going to haunt that man. Honestly.

I would feel bad for my new partner because I would be comparing them to Cameron every day. I'd be like, oh, that's not how Cameron did it. See, that's not fair. Oh, that's not how Cameron did it. That's not fair. Yeah. I'm just saying. I'm not saying what I'm saying is right. I know me, though. I am not that good of a man. I want you to come visit me. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. She brings you flowers with her new man. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. He's going to come with me. You're going to go grab his ankle. Come here. You take him down with you.

0 for 2. 0 for 2. She'd be 0 for 2 at that point. You'd take her man with you. Oh, yeah. I'd be like, try again. Your first guy died. Oh, so you're saying you would come back alive and kill the new guy? Yeah, I would stick my hand through that grave and grab him. Michael Jackson thriller.

Are you serious? And I'll be like, try a third time's a charm. That's some toxic shit. Oh, 100%. That's some toxic shit. But it's just, if I'm being 100% honest, if I die, give me like a decade. Give me a decade of respect. Yeah. Then you can go find something. Give me a decade with God. 10 years? Yeah. No, it's long, but I'm a selfish, insecure man. I need you to be alone. I don't get fucked up by myself. You have your friends. Isn't that sad? What friends do I have? Hannah, Ashlyn.

Your parents? They're not doing their own life. They're not going to be trying to take care of Liv. Go to your mom. Yeah, okay. I'm just kidding. I love my mom. You wouldn't live with Lolly? If I died, you wouldn't move back in with your mom? Be honest. Here we go. You're on the hot seat. Yes, I would live with my mom, but we might strangle each other. What about my mom? You live with my mom. I might live with Arnita. That's where we're going to go. We're going to go live with Arnita. Okay, so she loves you, Lisa and Lolly and Arnita. Okay, so I need help. Okay. Okay.

Y'all have been out of the dating world for a long time. Long time. Long time. Too long. I want to go get some shots up. Six years now. Six years of being. I want to go get some shots up. I'm not going to lie to you. What? You're going to flirt for sport? Put some shots up. All right. You put some shots up. I'm going to put some shots up. Let's see who wins. Oh. I'm going five for five. You're going to probably be 0 for five. You think I'm going 0? If me and Liv went to a bar together and we both said, all right, game on, soldier. Compete good. Play clean. I would blow you out of the water.

I would say a woman you have goodie bags You got a you got a day a treat just visible. No, I'm just like I am that girl talk your shit Yeah Okay, okay, you're that girl you're that girl I'm fun. I'm also a little crazy. They like a little crazy a little spicy Spicy mayo like you're just the perfect guy. Oh

The perfect guy is gonna go 0 for 5? The perfect guy. I feel like hers... In the dating world, it's hard. The perfect guys always get the shit in the stick. But first off, they don't even know I'm perfect. They're just gonna see a big, tall, slender, well-packed, double-stacked sack of white meat. Oven-roasted turkey. The way you approach yourself, you will be the perfect guy.

And Cam, you're bad at flirting. Yep. Because I've been, that's why I want to go get, I want to kick the rust off. You'd be so bad at flirting. I'd walk up, I'd go, Michael, Cameron, have a good night. What would it look like for you in the bar flirting with the girl? Okay, I'll be the girl. You're the girl? Okay. First off, you be the guy, you be the girl, you go first. I'm flirting with Peyton? Yeah. Oh, no, he's in the front with me. Okay, no, I'm a legendary flirter. No, I'm saying, oh, wait. I don't know if I like this anymore. I don't know if I like this.

This damn mic! Okay, so Payne's going to flirt with me, but I have to flirt back because usually girls... This is getting so weird. Guys will come up to girls. Yeah. Okay. First off, you already have an advantage. She's just going to sit there in the background and let other people come up to you. No. I'm the one... Yeah, you have to flirt first. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. Okay, so I'm like... I'm chilling like...

I'm chilling. You're that open in a bar? Am I by myself or am my girlfriend with me? You have the girls with you. I'm going up to Payton with my girls. No, with you. You separate from your pack. That's some creepy, yeah. Hey! That's a dud! Hey! Hey! Okay. How do you walk up to somebody? This is weird. I'm going to blow her out of the water. She's already in her head. Okay, okay, okay. I have that podcast. That's awesome. Okay.

Dude, you have that podcast. That's sick, man. That's what your fans do. I don't know. But are you a fan or are you trying to... Girls don't go up to guys and be like, damn, you look good. Okay, you know what? I'm going to do it that way. Okay. You look good tonight. Are you here with anybody? Damn, can I get a hey? Let me show you how it's done. I'm going to blow her out of the water. You're a girl. No, that's not fair. How? Because it's not really a girl. Then I'll do it to you. Okay.

No, no, because you have too much comfort. You just got to be a girl. Hey, bitch. Okay. Been an ass over. Make that coochie breathe. Let me slide behind you. Let me go and get a ride on the truck. Let me get on that roller coaster. Tom House, I'm sick of letting that coochie breathe. I'm right there for it. I'm your breathing machine. I got CO2 for you. Turn around. I'm here for you.

She'd run, she'd see that white chocolate, she'd run around, she'd be like, Dan, I bought a nice and I'd hit her with the, drop the shades down. I go, what's your name? Okay, actually, how you doing? So I'm gonna go out the bar, right? I'm sitting, I'm sipping. Good morning. First off, you gotta set the scene. It's all about setting. You don't just walk up, hey, you look good tonight. You hear someone? I'd be like, are you on medics? I'm like this, look, look. She's sipping her drink, I'm like this, I'm vibing. In the club, bopping with my...

Hey Damien, go look at me! I go, damn I'm not attached! Alright damn bitch! Oh god your tie is gonna be slashed! No I'm just kidding. Alright, you gotta look at me. Liv, you're opening- You try to act too hard! You changed your voice and you have a booger in your nose right now. You will definitely lose. Oh my god it was a solid. Oh my god it was a solid. I'll be like, you nasty bitch! Get away from me! And I go, we all have boogers!

Okay. That's the thing, though. You're talking about I would fail your opening line was, hey, you have that podcast. This is awesome. But that, honestly, you're trying to be too cool. All right, watch. I'm not going to be cool. Okay, here we go. I'm a bad bitch at the bar. Hold on. I'm not going to be cool, but let's set the scene. I have looked at her. She's looked at me a couple times. I finally approached at the bar. Here we go. Scene. Bam. Okay. Okay, hold on. Are you okay? Yeah. No, I'm joking. I need your help. I need mouth-to-mouth. She goes in. I go, yes. Okay.

Excuse me, is that seat open? There's no seat right here. Oh, so you're floating? You're gonna call me an idiot woman? You know what? I have three collegiate degrees and I don't know. Okay, you gotta work with me. I'll play along. Excuse me, miss. Is that miss? Excuse me, ma'am. Just kidding. Hey, lady. Excuse me, is that seat open? Yeah. You mind if I sit there? Yeah, you can.

Okay, I sit down. I peep her drink. She's drinking a dirty martini, two extra olives. I go, hey, you mind if I get you another one? Would you want another one? I don't know. I'm drinking a lot already. This is my third one. Okay, that's cool. You mind if I get my drink and I kind of just sit here? You already asked me if you could sit here. You can drink what you want. Hey, let me get a double smoked old fashioned. Appreciate it. Hey, so what's your name?

I'm Payton, nice to meet you. You're Payton? Nice to meet you. I'm John. You don't give me your real name. You don't give anybody your real name. It's your game? Yeah. Okay. Hey, John. Nice to meet you. John, nice to meet you. What are you doing out here? You're starting off with a lie. That is horrible. What are you doing out here? Drinking. Oh, no, no, no. I meant like, why are you here? Like, why are you in Dallas? I live here. Oh, you live here? What part?

Just around here. Oh, that's cool. You come here often? This is one of my regulars. I've never seen you. I've never seen someone so beautiful as you. Are you a cop? Like, what are you doing? You're like interrogating me. No, I'm not. My bad. I didn't mean to give off that thing. I was just saying you're so beautiful and I've never seen you around here before. I've been here a couple of times. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Yeah, no, I don't come here often. I don't really leave the house. Oh, you're a homebody. Yeah. That shit hot. I hype myself up. I go, damn, that's good. Yeah, you're doing

We're doing good. Yeah, keep going. Keep going. Keep going. All right. Keep going. You got to end the deal. What'd you say? I don't remember. I'm a homebody. I'm a homebody, yeah. Oh, okay. I feel that. I really only come out after a long, stressful day of successful working because I'm a monster in the podcasting realm. I am. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Okay. So the homebody?

Okay, I feel that. I respect that. I love chilling at the house, too. I only come here really on Fridays and Saturdays. Oh, nice. Okay, hey, my boys are actually back there, and I got to leave. I was wondering if I could get your LinkedIn. Your LinkedIn. You'd be horrible. Bro, it'd be better in person. It's awkward to do it with you. Redeem yourself. She said she wants to redeem herself. Okay, redeem yourself. I'm a cool dude at the bar. What's up? I don't want to steal your swag. Steal whose swag? No, you got to get your own bag. Get your bag. Come on. We're at the bar. I'm chilling. What are you sitting?

Yeah, I'm cool. I walk up to him, I'm like, hard! I beg somebody to get this girl some water. Dubs. It's hard walking up to a guy. Dubs. It's hard walking up to a guy. It's 2024. Make it happen. I can tell you how I flirt. I'll flirt with you. Am I a girl or a man? You're a girl. Well, a girl. It's me. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay. Okay, I'm a girl. Excuse me. This place is about to blow. Oh.

First of all, I would never go to a girl that's doing it. Singing? No. Just be cool. Be a cool girl. All right. Hey. Hey. Excuse me. Oh, hey. I just saw you over there. I got to be honest with you. I'm not too good at this whole coming up to people thing. This is very outside of my nature. What are you doing with your hands? I'm just an awkward guy. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's okay. I'm awkward, too. I'm Peyton, by the way. I'm Sabrina. Sabrina. That's a nice name. Bye.

I just wanted to come over and say you're beautiful. I didn't want anything. That's it. Oh, thank you so much. You just made my night. Oh, yeah. What are you doing? What have you done tonight? What's your night until? I'm just chilling. What is that with your jaw? Are you okay? I have anxiety. You got really clinched. I have bad anxiety, Sabrina. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, I used to date an anxious guy. He was a loser. I'd leave right then and there. Don't tell me about Texas. That's rude. That's rude. No, I'm just here with a couple of my girlfriends. They're over at the ping pong table. Oh, how'd y'all meet?

We're just friends from college, and then we ended up, two of us actually work at the same firm right now. Okay. Wait, did you graduate college? Yeah. What did you get your degree in? Marketing and communications. Dude, that shit is sick. Are you using it for your job? Yeah. Awesome. We're at a marketing firm. Where do you work at? We work at JG Wentworth 877-5. We work at Bill's Marketing. Oh, okay. So, like, what do you do?

So what do you do there? We market. So basically, it's kind of like the satellite marketing firm for the Buffalo Bills. Like we do social media stuff, everything like that. Oh, so are you like into sports?

Not really into sports, more into the sport of marketing, and it just happened to be with athletics. I guess I would rather do it with sports and teams as opposed to just like a regular business. Okay, so I'm very impressed by that, and I'm not going to lie. Thank you. I would love if you would teach me some more about that. We could watch a – they don't show many Buffalo Bills games in here, but – They haven't been good the past couple years. I can get you a first-class seat with all of your friends in a five-star hotel penthouse, and we'll go to Buffalo right now.

A first class seat with me and my girls in a penthouse five star. Yes. What do you do for work? Oh, I just, uh, podcast. You have a podcast? Yeah. That's so cool. I love podcasts. What is it about? And just like that, see, I already got it roped in. See, but I played the damn game. No. Whatever. Dubs for the boys. Dubs for the boys. What's, okay. Honestly, I would just win just from winning. Because you'd be like this, I don't know.

That's all you'd have to do. He'd go... How did I get you, Cameron? Say that again. How did I get you? One more time. For the listeners, one more time. How did I get you? How did you get me? So let's break that back down. So you had to get me. I did. I'll say it.

I suck at flirting. We both do. That's why we're amazing. And that's fine. And y'all talked about, we're going to end this soon. We're going to end this soon. I'm all here for it. But I remember in college, that's a college story, right? Y'all's love story. And sadly, I was not involved in it. Y'all didn't respect me enough to. And I lived with you. That's not true.

Y'all's watch story. I bring this up all the time. He still to this day thinks that he wasn't... I didn't share that with many people. Exactly. And there was nothing for me to share until it was a real thing. You shared it with somebody that was less close with you than me. She shared it. I did. She shared it, not me. You didn't share it with me and you talked to the... We were not close as similar. That's why I said there was nothing... You literally washed my hair. That's as close as... You were fingering my scalp. Hello. Okay, and so...

I'm going to tell a college story with all three of us. Oh, God. I need to know if y'all remember this. And add to the story because I remember in glimpses because I was drunk. Oh, God. And I know I was stone cold sober. You were. I was stone cold sober. Okay, so you remember we used to have dorm parties? We would go to the rooms and we'd have dorm parties, right? And we'd have $2 vodka there and slap the bag wines. Oh, I was so good at that. Yeah. And the biggest fear was an RA or campo, which is campus police. Yeah, I was the RA.

Okay, do you remember we were at Seminole Nation, right? We were in Nation, and we were at the first floor. Right? We were in the first floor of the dorms. Like where they played tennis and stuff? Yeah, but we were in a room. I forgot whose room it was. We were in somebody's room on the first floor. I don't remember why we were there. It was one of those nights where we were hopping around. Okay, okay. It's like different things. And we ended up there, and everybody ended up there, like all the athletes. Okay.

And we were all drinking in there. Was I there? Yes, you were there. Such a small room. Yeah, it was. And it's hot, nasty. We were gross back then. Do y'all remember that? And there was a window in there. I distinctly remember a window. And it was like 1 a.m. And we were drinking. And I was gone. Blasted. Do y'all remember when campus police flashed their light into that window? And everybody was like, Campo! Campo! And everybody ran into the bathroom to hide.

I remember running into a bathroom to hide, but the one I... That was up in Rosler. The one I remember was Rosler. There was a multiple times. That happened multiple times. The one I remember was Rosler. I don't remember the similar nation. I don't either. So me and Davion, we hid in the bathtub. At Rosler. No, I promise you. Yes, it was. Oh, it might have been. It was up at Rosler. The one at Rosler was crazy. Okay, and so you remember, and I embarrassed myself. I might have told this story before, but I embarrassed myself. I know exactly what you're... Yes. Because I started dumping the alcohol in the sink, and the cop came in.

Everyone was like, what the? It might have been. Yeah, we had a huge tennis coach, and he literally walked in like this.

And his phone was on his stomach and he was just recording everybody. Yeah, and so I don't know why I decided to do that. Oh, you're a narc. I was so anxious. Like, if we're going to get... It wasn't me! Yeah. And he's dumping the vodka. And so all you could hear is click, click, click. And everybody was trying to be quiet and, like, pretend they're sleeping. The lights are off or whatever we were doing. And I was in the bathroom pouring the alcohol. And he was like, what are you doing, man? Oh, my God. What is the... Do y'all remember, like, a crazy story from back then? Davion didn't stop you? Davion was just laying in the tub giggling. Like, he's like...

He's like... Dude, a crazy story from Seminole. I would have to say that there was one night where Cameron was always our driver. You were always DD in college. Always DD. And he always wanted to go to Taco Bell. Yeah. So we all, for some reason... Oh my God, I remember that night. Me too. We were in a phase where we like to twerk in everywhere. And for some reason, we were in the Taco Bell driving through, me and the Seminole State basketball team. And we got on top of Rhonda's hood and started...

working. Yeah, y'all got on top of Cam's car and started twerking. And a young girl was so short that she was actually standing in my passenger seat twerking in the car without her head hitting the top. Not going to say the name. She had a motor. She had endurance out the ass. Very, very

Six songs deep. She's just pop, pop, pop. I would say that, bro, because we were literally three cars deep at Taco Bell. It was twins car, twins car, my car, and I don't know who's behind me. And everyone just popped out and I was blaring something in Rhonda and everyone was just...

Just ratchet times. Ratchet times. College was insane. College was an insane time. All right, is that good? Do you all want to say anything? You want to bring up something or anything? All right, you know how you quizzed me earlier about a best friend and see if I know you? Yes. I want to see, does my best friend or my wife know me better? 100% I know him better. Oh, you're a liar. You're a liar. We met him at the same time around. You have a year on me. But I'm with him 24-7. I know his good spots. I know him inside and out.

I know I'm inside too. Oh my god. We're about to see. Enough of this. I'm going to get right into it. Kiss. Besso. Singular uno beso. You get a kiss with tongue, I get a kiss on the cheek. Please with tongue. Alright. We're going to start simple. We're going to get a little greasy with the cookie. When we do this, do we just sporadically say the answer? How do we do it? How do you want to format it?

I ask the question and then I go three, two, one. You both say it. So neither one of you can cheat. No, no, no, no, no. No, she gets a question. I get a question. Is that what we did on Patreon? No. We had to answer the same one. At the same time. Okay. Because then it's like if you hear hers. Cool, cool. Yeah. Okay. We're going to start easy. What type of music do I like best? Rap. Rules out the window. Wife doesn't listen to instructions. Hey, Cam, point Payton, I listen to you. You're getting close to that cheat kiss. There you go.

Wife doesn't listen. Okay. What's my favorite color? Three, two, one. Blue. Okay. I want it more. Here we go. Another simple one. Okay. Growing up, what was my favorite subject in school? Math. Point Bain again. There we go. Closer to that cheat. Anytime she breaks rules. It's McAncy. You take two.

And you asked these already on Patreon. Just think of some cool, you don't have to get them off there. Think of your life. Yeah, why are you looking? Okay, here we go. Here we go. Which am I? Pancakes or waffles? Three, two, one. Pancakes. Waffles. Correct answer is waffles. Yeah! You're a liar! That is a lie! That is not a lie. You don't ever order waffles at a restaurant.

I would never scream at you like that. You're lying. I'm not lying. I would never scream at you like that. Cameron. I don't order waffles at restaurants. When was the last time I bought frozen pancakes for the house? Yep. He's an eggo guy. Let go of my eggo. I always have waffles at the crib. Exactly. I'm a waffle guy. That's a waffle. Wow. Okay.

And he likes them with butter. No, he doesn't. You don't even know. You don't even know. You don't even know. I know it's about the waffles. That wasn't. All right. What's my favorite type of pizza? Three, two, one. Pepperoni. Meat lovers. Pepperoni's right answer. God damn it. You love meat. I do. I love a lot of meat. I love your meat. Thank you. But yes, pepperoni 100%. What's the score?

I'm thinking it's like 2-2 right now. It's pretty locked up. If we take her... If we take the... DQs? The faulty points, yeah, it's like 4-2. Okay. Okay? Give us some intricate things. What is my favorite candy? 3, 2, 1. Swedish Fish. That's not a candy. Reese's Pieces? It's not a candy. Reese's Pieces is a candy for sure. That is... No, no, no, that's a snack. Reese's Pieces. A candy is like...

You got a sugar on it. That's chocolate. It's chocolate. Reese's Pieces is chocolate. That's a dessert more than a candy. That's literally in the candy aisle. Candy when you buy candy from a movie theater. Reese's Pieces is literally there. Candy. What? Are M&M's candy? He doesn't know what Reese's Pieces are. Yeah, you're thinking of a weird... Reese's Pieces is the peanut butter cup. No. That's a Reese's. That's a Reese's cup. Reese's Pieces are like the M&M's, but they're peanut butter chocolate. No, mother... The Reese's Pieces are the cups with you. Reese's Pieces. That is a Reese's. Pieces. They're little pieces. Reese's Pieces butter cup.

What? What? Wait, Reese's Pieces? Yours is criminally wrong, and you said the right answer on the second one, so still no point awarded. Okay, so it's no point. Peanut butter M&M's. Peanut butter M&M's. For a bonus point, what's my favorite gummy candy? Okay. Sour Patch Watermelons. I was going to say Sour Patch Kids. No, he likes Watermelons. You're both in the same ballpark, but Watermelons for sure. That doesn't count, though. That's not a question on the board. Okay, here we go. Give us something deep. All right.

What is my jean size? Okay. 3, 2, 1. 34, 36. 36, 34. Correct answer? Olivia, 34, 36. Yeah! Damn it! Y'all both know about taking them jeans off. Hello. Good morning. Give me that kiss. Next question. What? What? Oh, give me that kiss. Oh, I like it. Next question. What? This is criminal. This is criminating. Okay. What was the name of my first crush? 3, 2, 1. Aaron? No.

Nala with a s- I was talking about human beings. Oh. Golly. Can this one not be believed? No, that was probably my first- Oh, I do know this! And it was like, Aaron or something, wasn't it? You already just said that. You just said that name! You just said that. Are you having a stroke? You just said that! Are you smelling toast?

You just said that like eight seconds ago. You just said that oh my god. He's holding his heart. Oh my god No, you're having a stroke her name was Caitlin That's different from what I think of you I thought it was gonna be like Deja or something Yeah, all right here. We go. What is my love language three two one physical touch correct? We both take really good point in that

What was my smallest tenured job I ever had? Okay. Three, two, one, go. Hibbit Sports. Hibbit Sports. Let's go! The smallest tenured job. What job did I work at for the least amount of time? Oh, the least amount. Why didn't you just say the job I had? What's a score? What is tenure? Like your time there. Stupid. That is so stupid. You should have used correct vocabulary. What is a score?

What is the score? Peyton's winning. Okay, we don't even know the score because so much has happened. Let's go. We're going to go to five. Peyton's up. Well, I'm going to have it on the clip. I'm going to know. Okay, then you're up 4-1, 4-2. Okay, no, it's probably because she got three right in a row. No, I didn't. You got the candy. No, if y'all both get them right, it doesn't count. Oh, okay. She got candy and...

I didn't even get candy. I don't know. Yeah, regardless. Okay. Damn, what is the score? Yeah, because I say we got to have a finale. Okay, we'll call the score four to two. We'll call it that, but we don't know what it actually is because... Three one? So four two. To who? You. Oh, okay. Cool. Four to two. We're going to five. All right, here we go. Okay, let them win. Okay. Lock and lift. Oh. Comeback queen. In what car did I learn to drive?

Three, two, one. Mike's car. Your dad's car.

That is close, but I'm not awarding it a point. Why? Because it's very close, but I'm not. I technically learned to drive in Steven's mom's car, a little Camry. You're saying bullshit ass questions. Okay. Who is my favorite anime character of all time? Oh, okay. Here you go. Counting down. I don't know his name, but I know who it is. Three, two, one. The guy from Yu-Gi-Oh! Yes! Yo!

Alright, I gotta get a good one. Gotta get a good one. If I get the next one right, I'm winning. No. We're going to five? Yeah. Alright. What is my favorite ice cream flavor? Three, two, one. Rocky Road. Chocolate chip cookie dough.

Both wrong. Cookie Two-Step. What is that? What is a Cookie Two-Step? It's so good. Cookie Two-Step. Cookie Two-Step. Cookie Two-Step is a chocolate chip cookie dough mixed with cookies and cream. Cookie Two-Step sounds like a dance in 2005. Exactly. It's fantastic. Yeah, who are you? Sorry, you got nasty tongue syndrome.

Like who do cookie two-step? Yeah, my name is Cam. I don't eat regular shit because I'm a Slavic baby from the mountains. Both y'all can hop off. That's my favorite damn ice cream. I asked the question and that's what it is. All right. Give us a good one. All right. So you don't know me as good as you think you did. This shit doesn't exist. You can't buy it. You got to go to a flea market to buy that shit. Around two years ago. Okay. What was a quirky item that I slightly collected?

3, 2, 1. Funko pops. Yeah, because she was like, okay, that's the only reason she knows that. She's like, oh, I forgot I'm married to a six-year-old. I got to get him toys. I hated that shit. The only reason why I know that is because that shit is ugly. I like those. Cam was like, I'm 26. I want toys.

Why I got you a Funko Pop for your bachelor party. Why do I know that? Exactly. Shammy. Rotten asshole. Okay. Sorry. All right, Payton. All right, what's the score? Four to three. You just kicked over your Red Bull. Sorry. Four to three. Here we go. Okay, here we go. In my younger years when I was growing up, who was my celebrity crush?

Hold on. Just don't say 321 yet. Let's think. In my younger years when I was growing up, who was my celebrity crush? I know who it was, but I can't think of her name. Hold on. I got to think of her name. Nope. Just wait. I got to think. Hold on. Let me think for a little bit. I mean, if you can pinpoint her without saying the name, I'll probably award the point as long as the other person doesn't do the same. Is this a game point for both of us? No. It's four to three. It's your game point. Okay. Okay.

Younger. Younger years. Celebrity crush. Three, two, one. The Girl From Pitch Perfect. Queen Latifah. Oh, my God. No. No. Wait. It was Ashley Tisdale.

You? Yes. What happened? I like that. I was obsessed with it. I thought it was Queen Latifah. You had a... You were just make up stuff. You were making this up right now. How am I making it up? You can't tell me my life. Wait, time out. Wait, time out. You were spicy for Queen Latifah for a little bit. I liked a lot of them. Because that one movie when she...

You liked that movie. You remember that movie. She's been topless in the movie? Oh, my God. Why haven't I seen it? Oh, my God. It was one of the best movies I've ever seen. Was it a good scene? Yeah. That scene got me through some questions I had. I need to go watch that movie. You were spicy for Queen Latifah, no? 100%. I need to go watch that movie. Wow. I need to win. He's lying. I'm not lying. Yeah. Ashley Tisdale is crazy. I'm not lying. You had a thing for Bop It to the Top? Okay, here we go.

You saw her climb up that ladder and you're like, "Ooh, Ashley!" Every year at Thanksgiving, what is my favorite dessert? Three, two, one... Apple pie. And the winner with the answer of apple pie. Yes! What? Get away from me. You just gotta think about it. Why are you getting mad at me? It's literally apple pie.

I'm sorry. That's his thing. You call me sloppy? Yeah. He said you black people. All right. That was a fantastic episode. Round of applause for Mama Liv. Mama Liv. Thank you for joining Mama Liv. Tour tickets are... Oh, this is your part. Go ahead.

Thank you for coming back. Another episode. Episode 111, as he said. Angel numbers. Angel numbers. Go get your good karma. Tour tickets, everything, information, tour tickets especially are linked below. They're the top link. We want to see those pretty little faces because if we don't see you now, you ain't going to see us until 2025, and that's a long time away. So we absolutely love y'all. Confuse the casuals and get your good karma with this week's secret code.

DMS. DMS. DMS. Oh, God. What's the first word? Dry. Dry.

Dry mouth syndrome. There you go, baby. Dry mouth syndrome. Dry mouth syndrome. It's a very real thing. Peyton suffers from it. Pray for Peyton for his DMS. Confuse the casuals. Leave it on all the comments. Share this with a friend. Send it to somebody. Tag us in your own who knows me better wife or best friend videos. Let us know. Leave some love for Mama Liv in the comments. Woo! And remember, one out of ten quad bears don't make it home to Christmas. And we'll see you. Good job, Liv. Next time. Hello? I got it.

I still love my wife, even though she doesn't love me or know me.