PUT YOUR PICKLE AWAY! (FT. HARRY JOWSEY & DOM) -You Should Know Podcast-
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Hey, everybody, welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast, episode 130. If you're new here or if you haven't already and you look below, you see the subscribe button isn't pressed, you're wrong. If you look even more below that and you see the comment section isn't fulfilled with your name, guess what? Even more wrong. Go and fill that out. Get your good karma. We have...

A big announcement. One of the announcements that we've been holding on to, honestly, for about a year. It is time that we finally tell you. Are you ready? Are you ready? The You Should Know Podcast begins.

Sorry, that was a dramatic cough. The You Should Know Podcast live show will be available on demand for you to watch anywhere in the world on September 28th. Round of applause.

Oh, it doesn't stop there. We know we only hit a select few cities this past year when we went on tour and we got so many DMs saying, Peyton, Cam, come to this city, come to this city. I wish we could have seen this tour. I know it's going to be the only time that we'll be able to see this show. Well, guess what? We had a little ace up our sleeves the whole time. We recorded my hometown show in Austin, Texas at a sold out Emos Theater.

It is literally a movie. It is beautiful. And on September 28th, it will be available for you to buy and download. So you can watch it anytime, anywhere you want. So you can see the magic of the summer tour, September 28th. But the announcements don't stop there. You're going to actually be able to watch this in a theater. What? On September 28th.

At Galaxy Theater's Grand Scape in the Colony in Texas. The whole You Should Know podcast team will be there. We are selling 100 tickets. So you can watch this in a theater with the whole You Should Know podcast team. And the tickets are available right now. Link in the description. Let's go. Let's go.

This took so much time. This took so... This... God bless you. This... I love the excitement. I'm excited too. I know y'all are excited. This took so much behind-the-scenes work. You do not understand. You don't get it. It's taken years off of our lives. But...

We wanted to make this special. We wanted to make this work. So September 27th at Galaxy Theater, Grandscape, Texas, the whole UChino Podcast team as well as the UChino Podcast family, 100 of y'all can sit in the theater and watch us. September 27th at 7 p.m., Galaxy Theaters. And then on September 28th, anywhere in the world, you'll be able to purchase and download it, the live show, and watch it from home 100 times a day if you want. But guess what?

The announcement doesn't stop there. The lovely live show merch that you were only available to buy if you went to a live show is going to be available online for one week starting September 28th. Round of applause.

We know that a lot of people, even if you went to the show, weren't able to grab one of these because they sold out in every city in the first 30 minutes. So they will be available online for one week, September, starting September 28th, the same day that the live show is available on demand. Right.

One week, you'll be able to buy the Summer Tour exclusive merch. One of the best things we've ever put out. I love this shirt so much, and I know a lot of y'all really want this. So go get it. Come enjoy the live show with us at Galaxy Theater's Grantscape, September 27th at 7 p.m., and then available on demand all across the world online, September 28th.

I hope the announcement was worth it. And this is not the end of our announcements. This is just one of the biggest ones we've been working on for almost a year. We love you guys so much. Thank you for making this possible. Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. We got co-host Cat back in the studio. Say it. Say it. Motion. Motion. Get out there. Touchdown, boy.

You know what I just thought of? People are at 6 a.m. listening to us on their audio device. That was, honest to God, way too loud for our audio listeners or if you have earbuds in. I sincerely apologize. And if that was through your living room where most people watch it, I'm sorry if I woke the kids. I'm not going to lie to you. The amount that you just – I saw the blood from your veins go through and your head expanded, which no one would think is possible. Yeah, large cranium already. Yeah.

You took power out of me. I got lightheaded watching you just now. No, I'm not thinking right. No, I'm not here. I'm not here. That's fantastic. My oxygen's gone. I'm just kidding. I'm absolutely here because we're back for another amazing week and episode of the You Should Know Podcast. You should know commercials? They're already here. But we're here. Okay, so God bless you. That was fantastic. We're not doing another infomercial. Okay, so... So...

How was your week? Just kidding. I already know. Why is that? We went to L.A. this week. And we slept together. Okay. That's actually one of the things I was going to talk about, but later on. Let me not get to that yet. Let's just slow down a little bit. Roger, Roger. Park the brakes. Park the brakes? Use the brakes. It's one of those. It's one of those today. It's one of those today. Okay.

Right. We went to L.A. this week. We did. Love L.A. It was a fantastic time. We shot with Harry, Jowsey, and Dom. You will see that later in this episode. As you know, anytime we do guest, we're going to sit here and banter a little bit before we give that to y'all. Excuse me, bitch. Okay, let's talk about this L.A. trip we just went on. Wow. Where do we start? There was something in my DNA in Los Angeles, California that wasn't correct.

And I don't know. And honestly, the day we've been back, like we've only been back for 24 hours. The day, this whole 24 hours, I've been literally like web MDing. What is wrong with me? I was about to say, you better say Googling. Oh my, do you want to, do you want to start or do you want me to just fry your ass? I'll just say this and then you can go. Okay. In Los Angeles this week, I don't know what it was. I smelled weed.

Horrible. Oh my god. Not just a natural Peyton like, "Oh, you're a little musty." No. It- I smell like a construction site. Yeah, you smell like the plane that we got. You smell like aviation metal, bro. I have never- Okay.

Let's just say this. We get on the plane. We get there to LA. We do some things throughout our first day there. And we go back to the room. Yes. Before we go out again for dinner, a little bit of just sit down, you and me time. Good morning to you. Peyton, he goes, bro, you stink. And I go, oh, oh, no. Oh, no, I don't. I showered before the plane and I have not sweated yet. I go, smell yourself. Pit check.

Pretty bad, but natural, at least. Still a human being. He takes off his shorts. Let's just say, immediately, the room smelled like tetanus. Like, it was absolutely... It was remarkable how bad your crotch region stunk. Dude, okay, let's just break down that hour of whenever we discovered it was my crotch. I...

I have been puzzled, bamboozled, run amok. Yeah, keep going. I genuinely am terrified, and my left nipple is sore.

I could literally, I could pledge to the Bible oath on the stand, and I can honestly say I've never smelt that ever. Dude, okay. I don't know what that was. And help me with this story if I leave holes. I will gladly. So we were sitting in the room, right? And we're just on our phones. We're trying to figure a couple things out. And this musk was...

Was just kind of lingering. Generating. In the air. The room wasn't hot. Normally in your hotel room, if it's too hot in there, you'll get in a room. It wasn't that. Our room was 65. And it wasn't like it was musty either. It wasn't like a lack of deodorant type of must in the air. It wasn't like... It wasn't from earth. It generally... It smelled...

Like they were building the World Trade Center. Yeah, literally. It smelled like rusted metal, bro. And that's why I was genuinely concerned for your safety. I thought you got like a cut on like a pipe or something. No, because we were sitting there and like we wanted to go do this event, right? We're like, let's go do this thing. But we have to kind of go. If we want to make it, we have to go relatively soon. Quickly. But this is the point where we're like, okay, we got to figure out what that smell is.

What's that smell? And so I was like, I don't want to take a shower. I already took a shower today. I don't want to take a shower. That's shocking. So I took my shorts off the room. It was like someone put on like an LED light of ass. Like it just kind of took over. It's like someone had the scent. When he took off his shorts, it was like someone had the candle version and the spray version. Someone lit the ass metal candle and then just went...

It completely filled the room. Okay. Like, if there was a color to it, the whole room would be orange. Yeah. Like, an orange hue. And so my go-to every day, because I don't really do laundry. This is about to spank you. I'm so sorry. This is about to frighten you. This is my go-to every day when I'm getting ready. My clothes, I have a closet, but my clothes are just everywhere.

everywhere. There's some on the stairs, some on my bed, some on the floor, some in the bathroom. Utter nonsense, by the way. So I'll kind of search around my room and be like, oh, I like those shorts. I like that shirt. And if I can wear it, my test is I'll pick it up and I'll smell the crotch.

of my shorts right that's my go-to and normally i know what's an oopsie smell i know that's not going outside today that has to go through a load of laundry before i wear that again and it it smells like i've been farting in it that's what it smells like yeah just gross male existence like like just a guy being a bro just a couple farts couple squeezes a little bit of sweat

And my nose is accustomed to this odor, to this human odor. Right. So I go, okay, Cam, let me see if it's my shorts. Right? I take off my shorts, illuminates the room of ass. I pick it up. I flip them inside out, which is my go-to. And I put my nasal, right, on the crotch of these shorts. When I say I was utterly shocked.

By the smell that conquered my being. I literally, like normally I don't react. I'll go, oh, that stinks. I was like, what? Oh, I thought somebody stole my shorts and put them in an assembly line. He threw them. It was so bad. He literally went, he went.

He got rid of them. He threw them across the room. And I was like, ain't no way. Ain't no way. Then this sick, creepy man tries to get me to smell them. And I stood firm, firm on, hey, I love you. I'll send an army behind you. You can call me in your darkest hour. But this isn't even dark. This is just pitch black hour. I'm not answering this phone. I just...

I can't. Yeah, I was like, Cam, please smell these shorts. If you are gagging at your own existence, like that's like when you smell your own fart, it never really hits like it hits others. Yeah. If you were to gag on your own fart, you know that shit's clearing out the room. So this is his shorts. Okay, but it wasn't

even like that it was no it was because i was genuinely like i can't be like that's not right no like i that's i don't smell like that that odor has never came for me right there dude right there dude after some convincing after about 10 minutes after oh hell no don't make me out like a little no oh no i'm talking half an hour we almost missed the event because he wouldn't accept me not smelling it

So, long story short, yes, you guessed it, I ended up taking a whiff. But, it was against my better judgment, but I did it to be a brother in arms, and holy shit. It is honestly, Peyton, like honestly, for five seconds, that was the strangest smell I have ever whiffed, I have ever wafted.

to my own, my own orifice. Like, that'll probably go down as the worst smell I've ever openly chose to smell in my entire life. There's nothing else I can ever think of that I could choose to smell that'll top that. If you were to dig up Sammy and sniff him, you would not smell that bad.

No, you fucking didn't. RIP Sammy. Let's be crystal clear here. RIP to that cat with the liver problem. Okay. And I know... Wow. I know we vowed to each other that this would never get released. What are you doing?

But I did record Kim smelling these shorts. You are not putting that in there, CJ. You're not putting... You are a literal bastard. We're already talking about it. No, you're about... You just broke a vow, and you said you broke the vow. That is unbelievable. That is... That is utterly outrageous. Cue the video. All right. Take a wee. Oh, man, it smells like metal, bro. It smells like a rusted pipe.

So now that they see that, y'all know we don't lie on this podcast. We are telling you these stories are true. And I genuinely...

Cam Lou was like, yo, you gotta bathe. No, you have to shower. I literally said, there's no amount of Febreze, Dawn, cleaning detergent that can fix this. You need to bathe your body and wear something else. You know how bad it was? I literally put the body wash from the shower on the webbing of those shorts and was rubbing it with a washcloth. And it wasn't coming out. And you thought you were making progress. But then you flipped to the other side and you went, ow, ow.

And it was only half the job. Half the job was done. He did the other side, didn't fix it. Dude, yeah. Okay. That was bad. That was wretched. And I don't know what it is. And you were a bastard for playing that video. Oh. And obviously, I would say, we tell the story about the plane. Yes, my breath was horrible on the plane. Yes. Cam knows when I wake up on a plane. Bro, I literally, I swear to God, I smell like Doritos and cheese everywhere.

Every time. But you never eat anything with cheese. And I don't know what it is. It's baffling. Because even... I don't regularly brush my teeth. But whenever I... I know I have a plane to go on. I have high altitudes. I will experience this day...

I'm brushing my teeth and I brush my teeth like 30 minutes before the flight. And I don't know what it is. Dude, you need to go to an orthodontist. You need to go. Not even a dentist. Yeah, I know. You need to see them. Because maybe they can put some metal bracket that has a diffuser and every hour on the hour just shoots something. I don't know, but you need help. Because all he eats on a plane, the free little pretzels they hand out and a Diet Coke. Yeah.

Did y'all hear cheese anywhere? Did you hear cheese? Or am I losing my mind? Every single time. It goes, ding. Prepare to land in Los Angeles. We'll be landing here in about 28 minutes. Okay. He hears the ding. He goes like this. Kind of opens his eyes. Falls back asleep. Right when we get to about five minutes before hitting the ground, he wakes up. I go...

Oh my god. Oh my god. Who's taking over the planet? Oh my god. It's rancid. It's so bad.

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Okay, well let's move on to you. You have some issues too. I do not have nowhere near what you have. So this summer for the tour, right, and obviously September 28th, you'll be able to watch this live show on demand across the world. And then September 27th at Galaxy Theater's Grand Scape, you can watch it at Movie Theatre's with us, 100 people. Tickets available now, link in the bio. This whole summer tour...

We stayed in hotels, right? We did. But I purposefully, because I need my alone time, right? And Liv was there and you want to be with your wife. We didn't stay in the same room for tour. So I haven't slept in the same room as Cam for a little while. Like months. I'm the best roomie you could have. I'm not even saying that.

Watching you sleep, bro, you don't look like you're healthy. Like, you look dead, bro. Like, your eye sockets go in, and you're dark around the eye, and you're so white. And it's like I'm literally watching a corpse. And, bro, so I remember it was like the first night we slept there, and we both—we had two different beds. And I flipped to, like, on my side to where I was facing your bed. And I opened my eyes for a little bit, and Cam—

It literally, the Grim Reaper was in. I was like, yo, I almost tapped you, bro. Yo, hey, Cam, Cam. I go, what, what?

Bro, you didn't even tell me about this. What did I look like? Dead. You looked like... I know I sleep crazy with the limbs, but like... It's your face. It's like you lose all body fat in your face, and it goes... So you're bone, dog, and you're so goddamn white. And your eyes are black, bro. I think I keep the room too cold, maybe, because that shouldn't be happening. It's like I'm in like Rim 7. I'm not even in Rim 4. I'm like dreaming about...

dreaming about my life like I am deep in that thing. I genuinely was like looking at you and I had to watch your stomach move to make sure you're still alive. I was like okay. And then the last night we stayed in LA. You tell the story bro. Cause we woke up in the middle of the night and looked at each other. Alright so the second night

unintentionally, I fell asleep way earlier than him. I'm talking like hours before him. I was just tired, whatever the case was. So I fell asleep again, like some dumb shit like this. Yeah. Like my arm was across my body, but I was leaning back the other way. So I wake up like an hour in. My arm is literally dead. It was like 6, 8, what time was it? It was, bro, it had to have been like 5, 6, 7, 8.

I thought you were talking about p.m. No, no, no. You stayed with someone else. No, no, no. The first time was like 2. Okay. Like 2 o'clock. I wake up. I look over at Pete. TV's still on. He's just chilling on his phone. I'm like, all right, bet. I fix my... I literally had to go like and drag my arm so that I fall back asleep. This time I woke up because I was too hot. Oh.

So I woke up. I was too hot. And I don't know how that's possible because our room was at 65. I'm too hot and my phone is still in the bed. So I literally wake up. My arm is like cranked again. I don't know what. I need to sleep in a stray jacket, bro. I need to sleep like a prisoner. So I wake up. I immediately hit my phone. It said 430. So before even rolling over, right? I'm fully assuming he's asleep by now.

So my two goals were to lean up and turn the thermostat lower and untuck my feet, like the sheets. So I turn around quickly. I'm like, is he? I turn around and he's literally like, I shit, you know, he's like this. He's like propped up on the headrest, on the headboard. And he's just like this.

So it looks like he fell asleep, like, seated. And I'm like, all right, he's going to hurt in the morning. He's like this. I bet. I turn back around. I lean up. I'm popping the sheets off. I'm so not there. I'm so tired. He literally looks like Ruby. He's a dog trying to make his bed. I was popping it out. I reach over. I hit the fan on on instead of auto. When I tell you...

I don't know why. I just wanted to check on him again. I turned back around. This man, at first he was like this. He was barely slow breathing, fully convinced that he's asleep. He's like that. I turned back around. He was like, just fully like texting, swiping. And I literally went,

And I jumped, and then he looked at me and started gasping for air, laughing just like that. It wasn't even audible. He was laughing so hard. You've got to think, it was 4.30. I woke up twice now. I am so tired and delirious. I turn around, he's wide awake, and he goes like that. He was like... It turns out, I said... And then he just started losing it. And then, bro... We didn't say a word. We didn't say a word, and I kept doing double takes. I said...

He was crying laughing so I went and I tried to go to bed. I turned around again. He was like and I literally was like and we literally looked like locked eyes and laughed for like three minutes straight without speaking a single word. We're for creeps, bro. And then the worst part is there was never a conclusion. There was never an ending. I literally just finally got all the giggles out and went you were

Oh my god, yeah, I forgot. I farted the hell- I literally said it. And then he kept laughing, bro. It was a wicked night. It was a wicked night, bro. The TV volume was at like 38. I went to sleep and it was at like 15, so you were sabotaging me. You doubled the damn volume. I literally was like, turn that down, bro. I reached for the remote and I went...

Turned it down. Dude, that was so damn funny, bro. And then we had to wake up at like 7 a.m. I was just like, God, we had to go record another one. Oh, that was that was to die for. It was the funniest thing in the world. Holy shit. OK. And then the next morning, Peyton was dancing naked to Key Glock. That video won't get out.

We can't have naked videos of me dancing in the hotel room. We gotta stay out of LA. We gotta stay out of Southern California. We can't go back. We can't, bro. There's something in the water. There's something in the water. There's something. Okay, there's something there. Because you stink like crazy when you go to LA. Oh my god. Okay. Okay, one of the things that happened in LA too is...

In our hotel room, there's a, or in the hotel that we stay at in LA, there is a lot of mirrors in this hotel. Yeah. Like mirrors in the hallway. Elevator. And so, yeah, there's just mirrors. And I don't want to start off a topic like this because the internet, as soon as they, people clip it. And then the first thing I say is I don't understand people are getting mad because they don't know I'm actually genuinely looking for understanding. But can you explain to me, right?

What's the, how do they make mirrors, two-way mirrors, and windows? Like, genuinely? I don't. How the fuck?

How does that work? I have no... I think the scariest is a two-way mirror. That should not be illegal. That shouldn't be possible. How am I seeing myself, but someone else is seeing me, and I can't see them? Dude, that's utter nonsense. The infrastructure of windows, mirrors, and two-way mirrors, that is science that was made from God. Oh, 100%. Someone literally was sitting there one day, a long day, he was like...

He just got the like a perfect little raindrop from our father hit him anyway double-sided windowpane And like he went and made it cuz there's no way I don't even know how they make a mirror from beyond It's just glass right yeah, but there's something on it to where you can see yourself like a plastic

There's something. I don't know if it's like a film layer that's like maybe it's something relative to the camera world in a thin, large version. I have no clue. Okay, so I'm glad that you don't know either. Okay, let's Google it. Can you Google it real quick? How do they make windows and mirrors different? So how are windows and mirrors made differently? It says windows and mirrors. Oh.

Oh shit. Oh my god. Windows and mirrors differ in several ways. Main thing is materials. Windows are made from a variety of materials including wood, vinyl, aluminum, fiberglass, wood clad, and composite. Time out. I thought it was just glass. First off, they're saying mirrors are made like this?

uh windows they're saying windows are made of wood wood vinyl aluminum fiber i think he's probably talking about that the edgings and stuff like that no no that's that's that's a case what the thing around a mirror is a window case yeah a window case it's like a frame a window frame there you go buddy it's not a case there's not a lock code to get into it what the

A case? A frame. You take it with you, you're just like, oh, okay. If they're trying to tell me that you need wood to make something to see through? Wood, vinyl, aluminum, fiberglass, clad, and composite. I don't know what that is. I don't either. Okay, then how do they make a... Mirrors, however, are made by applying a coating to glass, such as silver or aluminum, that makes them reflective. Oh, so it's just aluminum over glass. So it's glass with a coating, kind of like I said, by...

I don't like that. Let's talk about what they said about winders, right? It's just glass. How do they make a two-way? Oh, I'm assuming. No, because you have to be able to see all the way through on one side and not all the way through on the other. But maybe the coating. So look.

Right. With coating, without coating. Okay? So you're looking through regular glass. They only applied the coating on the one side. God bless you. You know? Because most mirrors have like a little frame around it. There's no need for this. Yes. So this person...

Person A is seeing reflection of said self. God bless you. Person B is seeing through the back of the mirror because it's still regular glass and then seeing through the other side. So maybe the coating allows it to be reflective to them, but since the coating is on the other side, maybe they can see through it. That doesn't make a lot of sense, but it's a working theory. You know what you just said, what you just said reminded me of? I think my first memory was in my mom's womb.

I remember kicking Preston out of my mom's vaginal cavity. You absolutely don't. You absolutely do not remember that. I do. No, you don't. Me and Preston were in there at the same time. No, you absolutely weren't. I just took longer to cook. Your brother's three years older than you. It took me a little longer to bake. A little longer. It took you way too long, if that's the case. I came out four years old. Every day, you come out, you're just like, I'm hungry. I'd be like, oh my...

Put him, get rid of him! Hell no! Put him back! Yeah, you're like, BB and J! BB and J! And you're like, I think that's my first, I genuinely remember I don't remember anything until I was like six. Oh, shit! No, no, that's not true. Probably like five. No, I deadass remember Preston was like, I'll see you in a little bit. And that's my first, like, I remember having that as a kid and I woke up in a panic attack and then I cried and ran to my mom's room and I said, when's grandma gonna die? Because that was my biggest fear. Peyton.

I need you to look at me. Are you okay? No. We need to get something for you. Your biggest memory, running to your mom's room, Preston kicks me out, when's grandma going to die? Yeah. That's wild. That is absolutely wicked, bro. And then so I slept on my parents' bed that night, and I think my dad was mad because he was like,

I remember him not liking me in the morning. He was like, no, he's nudging you and shit. He's like, you ruined my night. Bro, back to the grandparents. I have a very distinct memory. I went to a church one time when I was like six. Good. I mean, yeah, I went there often, but I remember this time. It was like something happened after the church, like a meeting or something. And all everyone's kids just went to the main like...

Ceremony room? Yeah. Why did I just go blank? The main room. The main, like, where the church is. Okay. And we're all, like, playing tag and stuff, running through the pews. You're going to laugh at me. And it's not supposed to be funny. We're all playing tag, just sprinting. For whatever reason, I immediately sat down by myself and started bawling my eyes out crying. And for no reason, everyone comes up to me and goes, why are you crying? What's wrong? And all I said was, my dad's dad is dead.

And that's all I said. But the thing is, though, I don't even know why I said it. Was he? No, I think it was true. But then the thing that really pissed me off is one girl kept saying, what does that mean? I'm like, grandpa. I'm like, what else would it mean? Dad's dad. He's dead. But I don't know what came over me, bro. Because I never even really knew my dad's dad. Like, at all. I don't know why the hell I'm in the middle of tag. And I just went...

And I just started crying. I said, what's wrong? What's wrong? I said, my dad's dad has died. And out there like, what the? We wouldn't have been friends as kids. I would have hated that. No, I would have hated your long hair and your skinny back. Your stench. I'm kidding. We could have bonded on the crooked teeth though. Amen to you. I still got crooked teeth. No, you don't. Dude. Okay. Speaking of a church memory. So I went to, when I went, I didn't really go to church like often as a kid, but like we were like a religious family. We just didn't go to church like that. Well,

But when we did, we went to my mom's old church. It's like this old southern black church. No AC. You're in there for five hours. You're going to miss the Cowboys game. You know, it was one of those. And so you know those kind of like black churches, like respect and rules. Like you don't play around. And so I've always been me, y'all. I'm going to test the rules. I'm going to test Deacon. See what he says. And so I remember. I hope. Oh, man. The first thing I remember that made my mom mad is so –

whenever the black churches sing songs, it's kind of like karaoke, right? They're just kind of swapping people. They're like, Sister Williams is going to come up here and sing a song, but she just rode in the car with me. I didn't know she rehearsed. And so they called this one dude up, and he was having like, I don't know if he was going through something in life, but something was convicting him to sing this song. And he was singing Never Would Have Made It, which is a fantastic song. I never, never.

Right? And that song, the studio version of the song, it's like three minutes. Dog. Brother was singing for 14 minutes. Yeah, that's... He got through the first couple verses and then just kept saying, never would have made it and slapping the amplifier and sweating. He made it through something. And so, I got tired of it. I said, yo. I said, Nita. I said, mom.

When's the song over? And she says, stop it. Stop it. And I said, all right. And then like Sister Johnson in the front pew stood up and she started shaking. And she said, yes, Lord Jesus. Yes. And I said, somebody check on her. Is she okay? And then I said, Mom. I said, Mom, what's going on in the front pew with Sister Johnson? She goes, the spirit is talking to her. I said, how long?

I said, tell him to call back. I've got to go. I said, I'm starving. I'm so hungry. And then so my mom said, my mom's like, you don't chew gum.

in the church you just don't do it but i was so hungry and so irritable like i was just anxious like i was like i need to move i need to stand i gotta do something she said chew this gum but don't you smack this gum my mom gave me a piece of gum but she gave me that super bubbly gum that they last five seconds and all you can do after that is just gnaw on it so i was gnawing on this gum

Never would have made it. It's still playing, dawg. And Sister Williams is passed out over here. I'm like, yo, what's happening? So I'm anxious. I'm going, and I start blowing bubbles. My mom grabbed my face. She took the gum out my mouth and put it on my forehead. And she, I told you to smack that gum. I'm sitting here in a light blue button-up with a tie on with a Hubba Bubba on my forehead, dawg.

That is stuff that I've kept in... Hungry as hell. You are fascinated by the length of this song.

You're good pure hearts checking on Sister Johnson. You're starving still with gum on your forehead and a blue button up. And I don't even remember if this was the intro song or not or they waited till the end of the ceremony, but there are like any newcomers stand up. I was a newcomer. I stood up and I got gum on my skull, dawg.

Mom, I love you. And you've taught me to be respectful of places. This is health. You never went back, did you? No, I had to. I had to. But then I went to my white side church, right? God. Oh, snooze fest, dog. Oh, is he? And I said, where are the drums hitting, dog? I said, where's the electric guitar? Where's the 808? Hey, Barbara, play that. And then...

But the respect, like you could kind of do what you wanted. Like them white kids was wilding in there. So I was like, okay, bet. And I seen they had muffins in the back room behind the stage and I was hungry again. So I got my ass up and I said, is that like the hospitality room?

And so I went in the behind this, the, the, the, the church, right? In this back room, I snuck off in there and I ate the whole banana loaf because I was starving. I went back in my, in my pew and they said, we have an offering that was given to us by the Smith family. And I was like, okay, by the Adams family. And they, and we're going to bring out banana loaf for everybody.

And they roll this empty banana loaf out. And they're like, there seems to be a problem with the banana loaf. My ass had crumbs on me. He said, now who would do that? He said, I was looking forward to that banana loaf.

Oh, that was a tangent. I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting to, Oh, to do that. I am. I am absolutely. I'm sorry. The best part about both of those stories is you ain't never told a lie. Oh my God. Hey dude. Oh,

It's these developmental stories, though, that I feel like have shaped me. At the church I went to growing up, it was mixed. There's plenty of people there, but it was predominantly white. Of course. I mean, it was honestly very—there was a lot of people, but it was predominantly white. And, bro, people would walk in with a dozen donut holes, super iced coffee, 44's from Sonic, just sitting there, chilling, everything, highlighters out. Yeah.

Dude, I went to Liv's grandma's church. I went to Momo's church. Oh, my God. It said, the little run at the end on the piano or something, they're doing the song. We sat down. He said, you got back up. I said, oh, no. I stood right back up. Jesus.

Everyone started singing again. There's the main pastor sitting there on a throne at the front of the stage. They said the same thing. They said, any newcomers? My dumb ass. I'm a sick, sick, skinny white guy. I'm in a pink polo shirt. And I go...

I stand up, and I literally was looking at faces. They were not nice. People look at me like, but aren't they the nicest? Whenever you get to talk to them. Oh, nicest people ever. This one woman kissed me. She's never seen me before. She kissed me right on my cheek. She said, God bless you. We've known the Johnsons for such a long time. They're the best, bro. Church is great. Go to church. God is the greatest. It's just funny stories. Good Lord. The You Should Know Podcast.

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Oh my god!

I don't know. Sliding? What does that mean? You've been sliding, right? You've been getting through life real good, real greasy, okay? What are you saying right now? So, you've been very quick-witted. Your joke's been on point. Your ego has built a little bit, right? You talk down to me a lot. I'm sadder than I've ever been. It's gloom when I wake up. Oh, no, no. Gloom turns to rainbows. But you've been very quick-witted.

So I wanna not get back down a notch, okay? Why would you want that? We're gonna do some good old classic riddles. Okay, you look like Kyle Rittenhouse right now. Little bit. No, I- Don't say that. Do not say that. We're gonna do- Do not say that. Do not- I think he wants to be on the podcast. Are you kidding me? Hey! Hey! No! Never! Let me publicly say that. Never! No, dog! Never! Okay. But we are gonna do some riddles. Yeah. This time with a little twist.

I entered in, are you smarter than a fifth grader riddles? Oh my God. So these are literally dedicated to human beings that are 11 years of age or younger. So if you don't go at least, if you don't shoot 50% from the field, we got a problem. Okay. All right. Okay. That's fine. Are you smarter than a fifth grader riddles? Are you smarter than a fifth grader riddles? First one. Here we go. What can be cracked, made, told, and played? My...

Wrong answer! Funny, but wrong answer! What can be cracked, tickled, fingered, and what? What did you say? What? What can be cracked, made, told, and played? I'm seeing dots, bro. I'm seeing black dots. I'm not even kidding. What can be cracked, made, told, and played?

People. No. A lie. No. An egg. You were in the right realm on the lie. Okay. What could be cracked? A code. Close, but no. A puzzle. No. A puzzle. A code. You're so happy giving me wrong answers. It's unbelievable. What could be cracked, tickled, and turned over? Cracked, made, told, and played. Cracked, told, made, and played. Yes. Yes.

Crack, told, made, and played. Made and played. Cracked and made and played. Here, I'm gonna give you a real big clue. Here we go. You can crack a... Egg. You can make a... Egg. You can play a... Egg. And you can tell a... Egg. Yoke. A joke. Joke. Oh, a joke! You can crack a joke, tell a joke, make a joke, play a joke. Okay, my first answer's better. First one wrong as shit. Okay, here we go. Okay, here we go. I have cities, but no houses. Forests, yet no trees.

and rivers but no water what am i what i have cities no houses a forest yet no trees i have rivers yet no water what am i bullshit liar uh think about it a farm there's no water on farms that's what i'm asking livestock just go off oh a desert it's a city a desert it's

No houses in the desert. So you're wrong right there first. Congrats. What? A city. Yeah. Cities have everything. Houses. You could be a human. Empty city. Jobs. What's the job out there in the desert? The sand dusting guy? He just gets a big ass leaf blower with a generator. Blows it one way. Well, no, but yours doesn't make sense too much either. Well, 11 year olds get it.

City, yet no houses. Forest, but no trees. River, no water. What am I? Hell? No! No. Last guess. Don't dip your head. Stand up straight like a man and say it. Ready? One, two, three. Heaven. No. One, two, three. Fallout. No! One, two, three. Help. No. Do you want the answer? Yes. A map. Cities, but no houses. Forest, yet no trees.

Rivers, no water. A map. It's a map. Okay, you're 0 for 2. Dora's map was always a little predatory to me. What? I'm not going to lie, re-watching the show is a bit strange. It is weird. It's very strange. Swiper is like the R. Kelly of that show. Yeah, he needs me in jail. Swiper the fox. What comes once in a minute? Me. It's going to get bad. What comes once in a minute? Twice in a moment. Your 4 for 4 is in the fridge. I'm done.

Sorry, I'm done. I swear to God, I'm already done. I said, hey, you can take my car if you need to. You good? Hey, that cheesecake's a little hot, but you can get it. Oh, shit. What comes once in a minute? Stop it. Twice in a moment. Quit. But never once in a thousand years. Oh, millennium. That is a thousand years. Yeah. What comes once in a minute? Twice in a moment. But never in a thousand years. What comes once in a minute?

Twice in a moment. Twice in a moment. And then what? But never in a thousand years. Think about it. Comes once in a minute. 60 seconds. Okay. Twice in a moment. What's a moment? You got any parameters? Your moment could be different from my moment. No. Once in a minute. I'll give you a hint. It's not time. Is it a physical object? No. A thought? Once in...

You're not gonna have a single thought for a millennia. A thousand years without one... I don't know what a millennia is. A thousand years. Oh, okay. Once in a minute. Twice in a moment. But never in a thousand years. I'm still thinking me. No. No. No. I don't know. What is it? The letter M.

Once in a minute. I don't... A. Twice in a moment. A. Let me make this clear. If your 11-year-old can get these, tell Buddy to touch some grass. How about that? Go get a girlfriend. Yeah, you're acting like I'm the idiot here. Yeah, that's a bit... That's a bit. Can we do a couple more and just help me? Let's do a couple more. We'll go through them. Here we go. Make sure I can get them. I can't promise that. I can't promise that. I have keys, but open no locks.

I have space, but no room. You can enter, but not go outside. What am I? I have keys, but open no locks. I have space, but no room. You can enter, but not go outside. What am I? You can enter, but not go outside? Dude. Who are these 11-year-olds? Yeah, bro. These aren't... I can't. I was thinking a warehouse. Okay.

I was thinking like saloon doors. Dude, or first thought was a janitor. Like dude, my brain hurts, brother. Like this is not good for me.

You know my confidence has been low. The answer is a keyboard. I can enter a keyboard, but I can't go outside? Yeah. What the f*** does that mean, dude? No, you're pissing me off. No, no, no, no. I have keys, but open no locks. Yeah. I have space. That's not true either. That's not true. Keys can't open locks on keyboard. If your computer's locked, you need the keys on the keyboard to unlock the computer. F*** you and your dumbass 11-year-old kids. Okay. Sorry. One or two more. Here we go.

There you go. Well, I'll get you a realistic one. Yeah, please. I mean, this is all, this is literally safe. Fifth graders. Yeah. Fifth grade from Harvard. Uh, what has one eye but can't see? Fetty Wap. 1738. It was a pillow. I think he just got arrested. I think he did. I think he was touching himself on a plane.

Sorry. Shouldn't do that. One eye, but can't see. Come on. Ready? Three, two, one. People. No. One, two, three. Slow down. One eye. Close. Honestly, no. I just lied to you. Not close at all. One eye. They can't see, though. A hurricane. No. That was a great answer. Honestly, to hell with these 11-year-olds. But maybe the hurricane can see. It always hits land for the most part. The answer is a needle.

A needle has an eye? A needle. The eye of the needle. It's a sharp point that gets... I don't like these. Do one more and then we're getting off this. I'm tall when I'm young and I'm short when I'm old. What am I? Benjamin Button. No? I absolutely knew you were going to say that. I was like, I pray to God he doesn't. Or it could be my grandpa. He started looking like a question mark at his older age. Stop. Stop it. You do get... Stop it. You got a little hunched. Stop it. Sorry.

Tall when I'm young, short when I'm old, what am I? It's not Benjamin Button. It's not Benjamin Button. It's not even an urban being. Tall when I'm young, short when I'm old. Tall when I'm young, short when I'm old. A pencil. Another fantastic answer, yet no. Answer's no. That was wrong. What is it? Take one more guess. Think about something that starts here. I'll give you a big clue. Starts here, you use it. As you use it, it goes here. Tall when I'm young. Tall when I'm young. And is living? No. No.

Your last thing was a pencil. A pencil's not living. There's wood. Not living. Wood is living, yes. A tree. Once they cut the tree off from its roots, dead. A water bottle. You said it goes down. A candle. Hmm.

That was stupid. Hey, honestly, I'll give you props because you gave good answers. You tried your hardest. The first two were abysmal, but after that, you hit your second when you tried hard. Okay. So I do appreciate it. Are we going to do one more thing, or are we going to have Harry and Dom join the pod? We're already kind of deep into this. It's going to be deep. Let's let...

Let's let Harry and Dom join the pod. So let's preface this before Harry and Dom are about to join the podcast. Harry and Dom are from reality TV on Netflix. You've seen Harry on Two Out the Handle. You've seen Dom on Perfect Match as well as Harry. Harry's been on a lot of TV shows. And they're great.

honestly great dudes. They're all fantastic. They're our friends. So what you're about to watch is just, uh, four friends hanging out in a room together. There's not a lot of structure, which I know a lot of y'all like. So, uh, if you are new to them, sit there, enjoy it. Just act like you're a person sitting in this room with us. We had a lot of, a lot of, a lot of fun making this. We, we were laughing like the first 10 minutes. Oh my God. It's just laughing. It's, it's,

It was absolutely hilarious, and both of them were a pleasure to be around. They're fantastic people, so hopefully you all enjoy. Enjoy this, and we love you.

Hey everybody welcome to the you should know podcast round of applause please everybody here come on let's do it let's do it best barks let's go oh that was a good one that was like a nice like a cute australian bark let me hear it let me hear like a like a grizzly one though oh you guys was

- Was Seal? Kiss from a Rose? - Oh, Seal with the-- - He does a great impression.

- Oh man. - Sorry. - Okay. - What are we talking about? - Where are we? - What is this? - Let's put this out there real quick. This episode is gonna be all over the place. No structure. We're here. We got Dom here, first of all. - We got Dom. - Thank you. - I didn't warn him. - Thank you. - He just showed up. - Yeah, I didn't even know I was gonna be here. Dom was like, "Yo, wanna pull up?" - I was like, "When you guys see the boys, "you wanna come?" And he's like, "Yeah." - We got Harry here as well. - We got Harry. - And we got Cam.

We've been, we've been talking for the past 10 minutes. It's been crazy. A lot of it has been recorded. It will not touch the internet. You just won't be able to see it. I'm sorry about that. Let's let's let's explain how we all met for the people that don't know in the most

rational PG way we can without saying too much. Let's do it. Let's do it. Sorry, P. Why me? Start it. Ask them. Oh, oh. Then y'all start. Y'all start. We don't do guests ever. We don't know how to go about this. Are we allowed to say Detroit? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

- It's like everything's rolling back. - That was a crazy weekend. - It was kinda like the Spider-Man meme though. - What? - Like the Spider-Man meme. - Oh yeah. - Like we were like, whoa, it's like alternate us. - Dude. - Yeah. - Did y'all know, this might be an ego question. It will come off as one. Did y'all know who we were before we touched down? You can say no. - Yeah, I knew who you guys were. - Okay. - I've seen you guys' TikToks. - Hey, appreciate it. - I knew, and I was like, yo, those guys are

Funny as shit. And I didn't want you guys to know that I knew who you were, so I was like, oh, what's going on? My name's Dom. What's your name? Cam. Well, I didn't know. I think he ticks because I'm better than Fred. But then Dom told me anyway. And then he showed me the podcast. I was like, oh, shit. Yeah, no, it's honestly wild. Our podcast makes no sense. Why is it successful? No clue. But I feel like this is a good blend. You guys are good, though. Come on. Why are you so on the gock?

*laughter* You have your good morning. Good morning. Yeah, good morning. Settle down. What are you about to ask? You ever have to wake it up like that though? You know what I mean? *laughter* You ever have to-

Like, oh, like, like in what sense? Oh, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, wait a minute. What have we been doing? Please.

He's like, cause I don't even know. Cause I don't know where the f*** you're about to surprise me to. I'm crying. I'm crying. Nah, like, Dom will, uh... What will I do? What am I doing? Oh my god, let the people know. Shut up. Just let me get it out. Sounds horrible. Nah, but like, in solidarity, Dom will go on a date and I'll plop a green shovel into it.

Wait, what? I'll give Dom a blue chew and I'm like, in solidarity, I'll have one as well. So I was just watching a movie while he's on a date. And this one time, he just like, I'm like, yeah, we're going to see this girl. And he just tosses me a blue chew. I'm like, oh, thanks, brother. And I see him up with two. And I'm like, what are you doing? Are you coming? You look up, Harry's like blowing bubbles. Yeah, he's already like. I'm like, where the fuck?

Like, where are you going? I thought you were just playing the game. Yeah. He's like, oh, I'm just going to watch Guardians of the Galaxy 3. I'm like, oh, my God. That's sick behavior. So what do you – you don't, like, indulge in the blue chew activity? No, I just, like, see how long it takes for me to get hot.

So you just accept it when it happens? But there was one time in particular, I'm like, I'm gonna go see this girl. I'm just waiting for this text. So I pop blue chew. You know, boys ritual. Pass one, two. Right? Now we're past this point. I go see that girl. Oh, she bailed. So we're just... We're just sitting there watching movies. We just mix some popcorn and put on Kingsman.

We're just watching Kingsman. And we're like, yo, this is lit. Should we run number two? No, no, no. Let's just get the popcorn in here.

watching cakes. They put the sequel out too. As much as I like you guys, I'd never want to hang out with you all at night now. I never want to be there. Well, funny that I blow. It was funny you said that. The whole episode, I'm just like this. You guys should try it. It's crazy. I've never tried Butcher. No, I haven't. They should.

- But I'm trying to maneuver out of this one. But it's kind of on the same thing. Y'all are very close, right? - Wicked transition. - Because we're very close as well, but he's more like hesitant when I try to do very close things with him. And I ask, like, - So Jack? - What are you looking at? - He looked back at us. - Oh yeah, that little male shutter. I saw someone walk through. - I thought I was about to get hunted.

I asked him, we only had like three guests on the podcast. So it's a ritual now with every guest. We'll ask this. It's perfect because it's the first time we have two best friends together, right? Yeah, that's my dog. Don't touch my leg.

The blue chew has five more minutes. Whatever. I'm not going to say it anyway. I'm going to not laugh. He's like, you saw that gum I spit out when I walked in? No, no, no. But I ask him this, and he hurts my feelings with his answer. I say, if I got in a bad accident, right? I'm leaving. Excuse me. There we go. I lose both my hands. Yeah.

I can't use it. I got to wash myself. Right? I got to bathe. You know what I mean? What conversations do you guys have? I'd rather do the Blue Street Deals. You know what I'm saying? And you got to wipe. You know what I mean? You go take a poo. I see where this is going. Yeah. Ask him, as my best friend, as my brother, sometimes lover.

Would you wipe me? And what's your answer? I said, first off, I said, of course I would. I just feel like someone else falls in line before me. There's a nurse. That's what I said. I said, there's a nurse. Your mom loves you dearly. It's me. Maybe mom. Maybe there's a significant other at that time of the accident. But if I had to, the answer is yes. I just said, I feel like I'm like...

Like the third box. But I feel like, look, you lost your hand. Just get the stump in there. Oh my God. Honestly, just wrap it like a washcloth. How would I wrap it if I don't have hands? Oh, he doesn't have another hand though. How would he wrap it? Use your feet. You have to put it on like a thing. Get a rubber band. Okay, but I'm saying, say there's no one else and I'm only comfortable with him. Like I would let him do that. Even with hands, I would let him do that to me.

There's been cold winter nights. You know what I mean? Where, you know, get a little... But would y'all do that for each other? It would depend on the situation. Like, how did you lose your limbs? Okay, I'm going to paint it. Here we go. Harry's coming back. Hey, you ready for dinner? Whatever, y'all about to go out. Boom. Car wreck. Hands gone.

Already popped a bitchy. Now he's like, I got to take a shit. I got to bathe. Dom, you're right here. You're my best friend. What are we doing? And you're coming to dinner with me. Yeah. Like y'all just hanging out. Dinner, anything. He's got blood on him. He's got some poop. And he doesn't have hands. He has zero out of ten fingers left. What are you doing? What are you doing? Who's at fault?

Did he run the red light? Yeah, did he run the red light? Did someone else run it? Let's say no, completely innocent. Wasn't on his phone. He was just cruising, cruising. Yeah, I'd help you out, bro. Nice. I've picked your nose before type shit. Good man. Yeah, you did. Yeah. All right, now reverse it. Harry's like, fuck.

That's crazy! Nah, I'm wiping your ass. Okay. Nice. Now say you gotta bathe, right? Yeah. Alright, brother. How deep does this rabbit hole go? He's like, "Now you gotta make love." But it's not a one night thing. Now Dom hasn't had a woman's touch in quite some time. Gonna put a wig on and come in the room. He's like, "Open up, blue juice." He's gonna eat blue juice, yeah.

So, so it's gotta be it's not just a one-time thing this is gonna be the rest of his life

Bathing in the lotion. Let's say the lawsuit takes two months. What? What lawsuit? For him to get the money, to get the nurse, to get his prosthetics. Two months. He's going to be with some nubs, no fingers, no hands. Can you hold it down for two months? If I've done it once. There we go. I feel that. If I'm one ass wipe deep, I would probably... Might as well go a thousand. I'd fuck with you with bait and shit. Sorry? I don't know. He's like...

Yeah, like if we had some Popeyes or some shit and you were just like on the toilet, I'd be like, oh, you're going to have to wait. You're going to have to wait. You're going to have to crawl everywhere. Yeah, we're going to have to let that one crust up. You're going to have to get curry or something. Y'all are better than me. I would do it with

Like, I would appreciate... Be careful now. Appreciate what? With vigor. That was awfully close. What the hell? Vigor. Yeah, I can't say that. No, we shouldn't. No, we absolutely shouldn't. You'll just have to enunciate a little harder on that V. A lot of...

Yeah, I was like, what? Is that what it'd be? What do you mean with a vicar? Like, I'd be proud of it. Like, I would look him in the eyes. I would make sure. You're getting, like, hype. Oh, my God. Like, you're wiping from front to back. Oh, my God. From front to back. Like, yeah, like, Cam's like, like, Cam's actually like, yo, I just took a shit. And you're doing, like, LeBron James. I'm running. You're putting the chalk up in the air. You know?

Turning on LEDs, everything. I'm making a nice vibe. Yeah, you put on a shooting sleeve. Okay. What? The You Should Know Podcast.

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Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. Okay, here we go. Weird. Another weird transition. But I have a question. I feel like all three of you, I just, I have an inkling that you're each going to have a story maybe. Have you ever been, have you ever felt you've been too dirty for sex?

Yeah. His face was like... Like mentally or physically? No, like physically. Like a musk. Maybe you were at Coachella for nine hours and then... Yeah. But do you think that's a thing though? My favorite place. Do you think being too dirty for sex? Well, yeah. I came back and pissed the bed one night. Wait. At Coachella.

You pissed the bed and then had sex in it. Well, nah, not that one. Oh. Wait. No, actually. Hold on. Yeah. Okay. No, 100%. Like, I'll tell a story. I'm completely honest on this podcast. And CJ, cut it out if I say too much. But I was in Vegas. I think that's the first time I saw you. What was I doing? You were drunk. You were by yourself. You were by yourself. You were walking to a section. We were at...

resort world like on the pool and there was like a concert happening out there and so i was just out there i was trashed well you were you i could tell you're having a good night seven out of ten maybe i was just like hello harold and it was like that and then you're like hello and you kept going yeah no next time that happens just grab me and hold on just take it by myself that's weird it's like 2019 this is a long time ago or something like that oh it was a while ago but

I was there, having a good time. It's Vegas, and I was in denim jeans. It was like 109 outside, right? Goddamn, a crocodile could have lived in my underpants, how swampy it was in there. You know what I mean? It was like Louisiana Bayou right in the area. And there was this lovely woman. Oh, what? Oh, what? There was this lovely woman. The vibes were right. And we were together that whole night, like two hours in this outdoor club.

One thing led to another. And she was like, can I come back to your room? And I said, good morning to you. Of course you can. You know what I mean? And...

- And you get up to the room, you de-clothed and then that scent of your own being. - I thought you were flopping it up. - He said, "I'm a good idiot." - He said, "Get back, you just take the-- - He said, "Bye, you're a snake." - You get that must and you realize you have to address you're not the most cleanly person in the world. - See, I always, I just shower before any of it. You didn't do that? - I'm too vulnerable in the shower.

I'm like, yo, what do you mean vulnerable? Like she's going to attack you? I don't, I was thinking to myself, he's going to come in with no heads. Yeah.

I just don't like doing regular day-to-day things in front of strangers. I don't like brushing my teeth in front of people I don't know. I don't know. Cam told me today he's only seen me brush my teeth five times. I think I've known him for more years than I've seen him brush his teeth, which is unbelievable. Wait, have you seen me brush my teeth? I guess brushing is kind of intimate. Don't say that.

It's vulnerable like I gag every time I brush my teeth, you know It's back there. I'm playing punching bag with my uvula. I'm hitting you know what I mean? Oh

Don't do that again. I kind of believe you, brother. I kind of believe you. Don't do that. So what happened? Why didn't you... So you didn't shower because you were too vulnerable. Too vulnerable. But we... And then she was like, I stink too. And I was like, I love you. And then we... Okay. Just that stinky scent. Oh, my God. That room smelled like... Like a boxing training camp. You know what I mean? Like it was...

Like leather and ass. Like a Saturday morning crossfit gym. Like leather and ass. You know what I mean? Oh, that's accurate. You know what I mean? Leather and ass. There's no leather in the room. I always got to shout. I'm like, I know I'm a mess. And I'm worried about my brand. I don't ever be like, yo, Harry's balls stank. He had that stank. Like, I don't want that. I don't want that.

I don't like it's already bad enough yeah so I'm like one thing I want people to know is like this is clean it smells nice I talk about myself enough on here people know if there's a woman that has seen the podcast before she knows it's not gonna be the most cleanly experience you should you should chase that brother

I'm literally like, you are... It's not too late to change your narrative. You are the author of your own story. You act like you're living by someone else's rules. Like, change it. But it's me. You can rebrand. Fix it. It's me. We're in a situation. You get your brand deals. You get your sponsors. We get sent so many, like, hygiene things. And I use them. But just my natural being is just dirty. You know, Koreans... Come here. Let me smell you real quick. Oh, take a weave. No, there's... I was watching... Wait, what?

That's good, brother. It's all right. Yeah. And now, if I were to take off my pantsaloons right now. Get them off. We're clearing out. I don't got no drawers on. Let's put that out there. I don't got drawers on today. Underwear.

You don't know what that is? He said drawer. You're wearing leather Subi cargos without underwear. Oh, yeah. You're going to be chafing like a... Yeah, that was kind of crazy. I just saw it. I spoke what I saw, but leather with no underwear. It's more comfortable, and these are really freeing right here in the crotch region. Why would you contain with Godgate?

I will say I'm like I'm not dirty but I am like I have a high metabolism so I do get sweaty during sex I sweat a lot it's really drippy oh my god oh my god no you never like this bandana no yeah no like this bandana will be wet by the end of this podcast but like you ever like

You ever been like, doing it, and then you start sweating, and then the sweat gets in your eye, and it kind of stings a little bit? I don't usually last long enough to start sweating. Yeah, exactly. Some of us don't have that luxury. Yeah, brother's flexing over here. Hey, good job, dog. You can sweat in 30 seconds? It's crazy. I'm like, you want a bowl of honey bunch of oats? I'm going back to the kitchen. Honey packing oats, if you know what I'm talking about. Good morning to you. But, that kind of leads me into another thing, right? I'm actually very nervous about this, right? Oh, here we go.

Speaking of, you know, courting a woman. There we go. You know, we've all courted women. You ever met a girl through FaceTime, right? Y'all have never actually met in person. Maybe y'all met on Instagram and then you got the number and you've just been FaceTiming for a while. But it's time for y'all to have like a real-life interaction. You maybe fly her to where you live or you go to a tropical resort and you're in a hotel room together, right? My problem with that is I don't know the pooping situation of this. Oh, easy. Okay, tell me how. Okay, because I was...

Not recently. He goes, funny you say this. No, no, no. Why did you just laugh like that? No, okay. Pooping situation. Because I was thinking about talking about this. Because I, you know, very close quarters with this girl.

And I was, dude, I got to shit. Yeah. Like I let that shit go. Cause I know girls will usually go to the lobby and like get out of the, like hold onto it for dear life. But I'm like running the shower. Right. And then I'm playing a song on my phone. Like, yeah, I'll just get ready. As soon as that shit touches the water, I'm flushing. So there's no smell. Okay. There's no smell at all. But if you are afraid of the little blops. Yeah. I personally, I don't think that's how gas works.

No, but if your shit is... Okay, you poo and you're just sitting there. It's going to stick up the whole place. If you flush it right away, it's out of there. Put a little bit of body wash in there. Body wash? Body wash is a good maneuver. But I'll lay down toilet paper so it doesn't make a sound.

I do that for pain. It's like a co-op mission. You're like a spy. Yeah, a shit spy. The music, the shower, he's putting the shit, he's got body wash. Yeah, I'm getting crazy. I've had a horrible experience. Like the first apartment, I moved there, my life is horrible. So there's this girl and I really liked her. She was like my first Instagram model. Because this was when the podcast was first kind of, you know, doing well. But I still had a not doing well. How many followers? Oh, yeah.

What bracket were you working in? You know what I mean? I was paying a little more in taxes that year. But my apartment at the time was still the apartment from before the success happened. So it was like a one bedroom and everything. It was actually a studio. It was a studio. So the bathroom, the kitchen, my bed is all right there. I had to shit bad. And this girl was so beautiful, right? And she was asleep.

And I was holding it for a long time. And so I woke up and I was like, hey, either I shit or I go to the hospital. And I'm looking at her sleep and I'm like, okay, I could sneak to the bathroom real quick and let one go. I go to the bathroom. I'm pooping. I didn't do the flush situation. I was just kind of sitting in it. And I was on my phone, so it was kind of marinating in there. Like, you know what I mean? I was cooking that poop. And I finish. I get up and I'm trying to sneak back in the bed.

I look at my bed. She's gone. She's not in the bed anymore. She went outside of my apartment. And so I'm like, hey, are you okay? And she goes, I physically could not be in your apartment anymore because of that smell. That's crazy. That's insane. And now I'll hold it for a week if I'm staying with a girl. That is a traumatizing experience. Yeah, that's a digestive issue, brother.

You need super enzymes and shit. Will someone else be vulnerable then? Okay, would we classify her? Is that shallow? Or is that a bit much? She's shit shaming. Yeah, she's a shit shamer. I don't think that's acceptable. I was actually seeing this IG model as well. And we're having a little... We're all just dropping IG models and shit now. Well, you are. Most recently. All right.

All right. Good morning. Here we go. No, but I was going to say she had really good etiquette. She had really good etiquette. We finished a podcast that we did together and then we had a bunch of mushrooms. And for some reason, they would make me so gassy. Right. And she's having like a little party at her house, whatever else.

I'm trying to find the bathroom because I was like, there's no way. She's the hottest girl ever. I don't want to let one rip or sneeze and it just comes out in front of her because sometimes you walk a little bit funny and it comes out. Yeah, a little slip. Yeah, a little slip. Anyway, so I'm finding the toilet. I found this one downstairs. I'm just about to walk into it and I just let go of the most horrendous fart ever. It stunk so bad and I opened the door and she's in there hiding with her friend from the other people at the party. She's like, come in.

And I just remember seeing their faces as the wall of shit just wafted towards them. And they were just like, what is going on?

And I was just like, I didn't say anything. But she took it like a chair. She was sitting there like, literally choking. But didn't say a word. And it was in front of her best friend as well. And I was like, because, you know, if you can smell it, you know it's bad. Oh, yeah. So I was like, this is probably like staining the walls. Oh, my God. It's like Harry's walking. There's like shit demons behind him. There's like an actual cloud of gas following him. Oh, my God.

It was, it was, we had a moment like that where it made me feel really insecure. I remember, it was like a couple weeks ago, we were so shy. It was like in the morning, you would like run out with paper towels, you're like, where's Bruce's shit? You're like, where's Bruce's shit? Cause you thought Bruce shit on the ground, but it smells like shit. Where did Bruce shit come from? Was it after the podcast?

No, it was like in the morning before he went to the gym. You were like, where's Bruce's shit? And I was like, Bruce didn't shit. It was like, he took a shit. Like, my shit was so bad. That was my dog. And he thought the dog took a shit. I remember you were like, where's the shit? Like, you were freaking out. You were like, where's the shit? Bruce, you shit the fuck out. And I'm just like... You start yelling at the dog. Bruce is like, what the fuck?

I'm just like, if a stench is so bad, you are, you're mistaken what species it came from. But yeah, Dom, you had, you had. Yeah, that was, that was bad, bro. Yeah. I will say when it comes to girls, I'm like, I've,

You ever like, I don't know if you guys are like this. I'm pretty sure all guys are like this. Like you like when a girl gets comfortable. Yeah, sure. Love it. Starts farting around you. Love it. Give me a whiff. That's what I'm like. I'm like, they fart. I pull the covers. I'm like. Well, I didn't go that far. All right, brother. I'm not a hot box. Come on. You know the game of improv, brother. Yes, and. What are you doing? No. I had to go fart on my nuts during sex. And I was like, that was weird. Wait, what? I didn't tell you this?

What do you mean she's far away? I'm like on top missionary. And I'm like, you know, you push the belly down a little bit. Oh, my nuts. Oh, okay. And I was like, did you queep? She goes, no. And I'm like, yeah, because I felt wind on my nose.

I felt the pubes on my balls. But then she got a little bit embarrassed. I was like, no, that's funny. Oh, fuck. He goes, watch this. He hikes his leg. What if, oh my God. What if he was like on her side and you were like, no, it's fine. Don't worry. But then as soon as you fart, she was like, you sick. What if she switched the narrative? Apparently she was letting a bunch go after that. She's like, yeah, fart all the time. You never know. I'm like, what? I'm going to shit on your pillow.

What do I ever heard? When is it appropriate to first, like, fart in front of a girl? First date? Yeah, immediately. Just let it rip. That's confidence I can never attain. I can't have that. You just let it hang. You just... This is gonna sound really douchey, but I'm always, like, whenever I fart in public, I was like, no one's gonna blame the tall, hot, nonchalant guy. That's crazy. That's crazy. If I'm at an airport or whatever else, I'll just let it go. But if I'm on a date, I'm like, what the f***? What the f***?

No one's gonna blame me, I'm chillin'. That's 6'5". That's a psycho. He's like, oh, it can't be that. He's like, it can't be that, model. It's that little... I'm like, look at that kid. Here he is, crop dusting the whole f***ing terminal. I don't even know. No one agrees? Okay. I like the mindset. If a hot chick's in a crowd and she farts, you see an older lady, I'm gonna be like, oh, it's f***ing Gladys. It's gotta be. It's a geriatric one. Yeah.

Wait, so okay. You're the only one all three of us said first date. Just be you you're the only one said no You're the what you're the okay, but that's how I am like I'm just naturally nasty So I think I'm trying to overcompensate for like hiding it. You know what I mean? You should shit your pants What she experiences from you can only get better I've thrown up on a first date like in my mouth I

all of it but you're kidding yeah yeah no shoot it was right like it was right here we're just in front of you have you had a normal experience you went out for a coffee at a great time no but i just have raging anxiety and so i get like acidicness in my throat and then like she made a laugh acidicness

Komodo dragon. Yeah. And so I was laughing and it came up and it, you know, you can feel it like a little knot right here. Yeah. So I felt it and I just, and a little bit came to this part of the lip and licked it up, swallowed. What did she say? You were just like, she asked me if I was okay. She was about to kiss you? What happened? No, that was it. We're talking. You got acid reflux?

- It's just the middle of a conversation. She's like, "So what does your mom do?" He's like, he's holding back his mom. - Yeah, what happened with your mom? - No, we didn't have a second date, but it was a good first one for as long as it lasted. - We vomited. - Yeah, but y'all said to be yourself. - Okay, okay, question for the bachelors of the group. Here we go. At what date do you think that, maybe some thoughts start creeping in, oh shit, this could be a long-term thing to where it's kind of like, it's up to you. Like the ball's kind of in your park. - After the first text.

The first text? Eye contact. Oh, my God. We're gold medalists, love. Yeah. Like, literally, I'll meet a girl, like, this is the one pitching my whole life. I'm, like, telling my team. I'm telling everyone, like, this is the girl of my dreams. We are LeBron James and Steph Curry of Love Bombing. Oh, my God. So bad. I'll own that title. Now let's go to anxiety over here. I'll feel it, but I won't say it. You got to say it first. Okay. So, I guess more. When did you figure it out? Well, shit. Dude. She kind of, like, she kind of, like, just.

When I went to the other school, she just came with me and I was like, fuck, this is either going to be really good or really bad. And it was really good. And I was like, it's been three years. I was like, this shit's kind of, I was like, it hasn't been bad enough yet. So, okay, but more of, if you're being- God, I want what you have so bad. Boy. Yeah. Damn. I really want someone to love me for me. So I guess even more-

I've hard-lodged for girls in the past week. There's a boy brother. I wrote the tell me lie situation was crazy This was the craziest shit. Can I say the story?

Yeah, I feel like the internet already knows this one. Okay. So, bro, this was the craziest situation. Dom started seeing this girl, right? And she really wanted this, like, plush toy. And it sold out everywhere. So this motherfucker orders it. It gets delivered to my building. They don't have it. Like, they can't find it. And he starts pacing, bro. I went on one date with this girl. Went on one date with her. Came back and was like, love my life, everything. Yeah. He's just...

pacing in the kitchen so stressed and i was like bro it's all good like we'll find it he's like no you don't get it like these are sold out like and i told her that i got her this gift and now she's gonna think i'm a liar and he's like so stressed so i'm texting her front desk it's like yo you guys have to find this shit my dog's tweaking yeah i've never seen him like this like this is crazy anyway long story short we find it we drop it off to her he wrote a hand written letter in for

Spanish for this girl. I don't speak Spanish. He doesn't speak Spanish. So Google translates a mother. So bro, then, and also mind you, he had hard launched another girl a week prior to this other girl. Yeah, at a Dodgers game. Then launched this girl after the first date or on the first date. She hard launched it to be fair. Whatever. It still got launched.

You hit the red button. So we're at the Tell Me Lies premiere, and we're sitting there, like Dom's had a few tequilas, he's feeling sexy, everything's going well, then the girl is on live. And he joins the live, and he's like, I miss you, blah blah blah, all the comments are going crazy. Brother, I swear to God, this mother-

I lose him for 20 minutes. And he comes back. He's like, bro, I just met this girl. Should I post this on my story? Of them in a photo booth. Her in her lap, like, kissing and shit. He's like, look at her. She's perfect. And I was like, brother. And I was the first one. What happened to the Spanish bit? The first time I ever checked on. I was like, brother, just give it 24 hours. For f*** sake. I was like, you're worse than me. I was like, are you serious? Like, she's beautiful. She's amazing. But just give it to me.

Monday! F*ck me! It was the first time I ever sat down. He's like, "We're gonna go back to work!" But he's like, "Brother, look at the photos!" I was like, "They're great, but just post the single ones." For f*cking sake!

Okay. In my defense, right? I need all the guys would be on this. In my defense, I will say, I'll take full accountability. I'm looking at the camera. I'll take full accountability. Love bomber extraordinaire. Yeah, I'll take that. Yeah. Right. But my thing is, if I'm love bombing you and you don't love bomb me back,

I will love bomb another person. I will carry on my nuclear love bomb strike on someone else. I will. Yeah. I see you with the hesitant. I'm almost, I don't even have stake in this conversation because I can't currently, but I kind of see what he's, I feel that. But do you actually mean it? Like, do you feel like maybe in the moment, do you feel like you mean it? Yeah.

No, let me tell you. I drank... Let me... I drank half a bottle... This is a really weird thing. I drank half a bottle of hot sauce for this girl, this Spanish girl, right? Brought her a massive, like, Evie doll. Yeah. Then I... She was like, oh, I just need this one more doll. So I got her that doll. And then she, like...

And then it was like she just wasn't responding to Texas. Yeah, she was being dry. She wasn't responding to Texas or she was being dry or whatever like that. So it was like even when I did the live, I was like, oh, I miss you, blah, blah. She was like, ah. I was like, okay, fine.

Has a shot. Yeah. Has a killer shot. Gotta go to the next one. He's like, I appreciate it. Yeah, the girl that I hard launched at the Dodgers game, right? Yeah. Hard launched it, took it to the Dodgers game, had a great time. Everyone's like, ooh, they're together, whatever. Next day, she just dipped off. She was in Hawaii. I just didn't hear from her. She's in Hawaii. So I'm like, alright.

Who's next? Okay. The game doesn't stop, brother. There we go. It's like LeBron James. If I take – I took an L. You know what I'm saying? Hey. We got a game on Wednesday. We got a game on Wednesday. Got to go warm up. Yeah. I know.

- Yeah, I'm not sitting this game up because I lost the last one. I got shots to make. - I respect it, but damn that's tough. - This is what I would say. Do you think they're not taking you serious? Like maybe you're being serious. You're like, I love you, but she thinks it's a game. That's why she's not giving it back. She's protecting herself maybe. - That's because you're giving into the narrative of love bombing. You're like, oh, he's love bombing me. She's probably like, oh, everyone's like, oh, he's love bombing me or whatever like that.

why don't you give it a couple weeks and see if it you know what i mean that's my thing no i feel it see if the trial period extends beyond there we go you know what i mean he's a big lover there we go i have a big heart you know he loves everyone i love everybody i love you guys we love you too man you beat us to the punch we love you too yeah i love you guys man

But no, but like, do you feel me on that? No, no. I feel like I catch a lot. I catch a lot of black for that, but I'm like, if I don't get the love or the, like the energy back, I'm going to put that energy into someone else.

And how long was it waiting until I put the energy into someone else? I think it's the time window in between that I'm not really like, I can't get on board with. I wouldn't even say it's the time window. I would say from a female's perspective, I would say it's the 10 out of 10 loving. Like if you're 10 out of 10 loving off rip, but then they see you 10 out of 10 loving on Thursday, they're like, fuck, is he playing a game? Is he dead serious? Or am I ass or something? Because imagine a conversation. If someone came up to you and they're just like, hey, man, what's up? I've seen your stuff. They're like, dude, what the fuck?

What's up? Like, you're done. Yeah. They're like 10 out of 10 off. You'd be like, what the f***? But if it's, you know what I'm saying? Okay, do y'all think it's flip?

flipped around i guess i know y'all's answer but for me if i'm talking to a girl right and like say we've been talking for a week and she's telling me about our future kids and like marriage and our life together y'all like that i i have names picked out already the minute i see a woman i can picture the child and i'm like i'm like oh i'm like eden no no here we got the names we've picked oh

What? Popeye, Beef Tartare, Gras, Peloton, Maximus, Zeus,

Cigar, Pop Smoke, Triple H, Vegemite, iPhone 16, Batman, Beetlejuice X3, Baloney, Adorable Mykonos Airbnb, ACL Reconstruction Surgery, Liam, Shellfish, Zucchini, Wolverine, CGI, Biscuits, Arrest Warrant, Hummus. Triple H is my personal favorite. I would love to see the girl that warns the arrest warrant name. Holy shit. Whoa.

Wait, those are children names? Yeah, for little boys. That's how CPS gets called. You can't name a kid that. You absolutely have to lose your son. Did I hear ACL surgery? What the? And then Liam? They're like Ficus, Bottled Water, Tanner, Global War. Zeus as well. Dude, Maximus. I named my dog Maximus, actually. See?

But then I gave him away after eight months. Yeah. Yeah. What? You were shitting inside? Like, dog? No, he was... Wait, what? He was so... He said, like, dog. Bruce is back there. I was shaking right now. I can feel it. He's cowering in the corner. And I'm like, dog. No, he was way too... We were in, like, a 700-square-foot apartment. I just felt bad. I was like, he needs a better life. That's fair. That's good. He took my earring out.

with his mouth and then made our other friend's head bleed. Crazy ass dog. What? What kind of dog is this? He's a shit dog.

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Now on to the rest of the episode.

You see my socks

Oh, fuck. Alright, brother. See, this is the thing. This is what you do. You don't own the compliment. Yeah. But I'm just... And you let your cock hang as well? Yeah. No drawers. You're raw dogging some leather cargo. Two and a half inches of it. Alright, brother. Good morning. No, it's just weird to me. Because I know me. Like, I wake up with myself every day. I know what my room looks like. I know what I smell like most of the time. And it...

We need to get you to therapy. Have you heard of Lexapro? I've been on it. Here we go. It's the best antidepressant ever. He only takes what I say with a grain of salt because I ain't married or whatever. Y'all need to like...

This needs to... Let's get that out of the town. Yeah, yeah. What are we doing? Let's get you some IG models that'll love Bubba. You need to listen to our boys here because they're in the same boat and they're having the confidence that you have but you're choosing not to operate. No, I don't have it. Like, I don't know where y'all get it from. No, listen. You're preaching to the choir over here. You're preaching to the choir.

I don't know... Wait, no, no. What the f*** does that look? You got really introspective there, bro. Yeah, I was thinking, don't worry. You started looking at me like, wait a minute, bro. It's okay, shit.

I'm trying to uplift my dog right now. Yeah, like, okay. I used to be really bad at taking compliments. Sit right. Hold on. Take some space up. I used to be really bad at taking compliments. And, like, I used to shit on myself. And I used to, like, use self-deprecation as, like, a part of, like, my identity and who I am to kind of feel like because, and it's probably subconsciously, that you are, you're tall, you're a good-looking guy. And if you, like, talk your shit, you might feel as though you might come across as, like, man.

maybe a little bit arrogant or a little bit of like a dick or whatever. So you kind of like bring yourself down to humble yourself. But I'm just letting you know, like, it's okay to feel like you're him, bro. Like, it's okay to pat yourself on the back and be like, yo, like, I'm a good looking guy. I did this shit. I got money. Like, I could treat people right. Like, I take care of myself. Like, I really did this shit. I did some shit that other people can't do. Like, I used to be like that. And then,

And I will say, this is a testament to our friendship. I'm such an introvert, and he really brought me out of my shell and forced me and pushed me to be like, yo, go talk to that person. Go do this. Go do that. Go do that. It's a blue chase.

It's all in the blue shoes. But he was like, yo, you're him, bro. Look at all the things that you're doing. Look at all the things you're able to accomplish. Come on, dog. Thanks, guys. I don't like hearing my friends talk down on themselves. I used to do that shit. Yeah, me next. You know what I'm saying? He goes, why'd you say that? My legs are skinny. What else? No, it's true, though. Also, the problem is, I think...

You're being afraid of being arrogant because I see so many dudes, especially in reality TV, they do that one show and they're cool for a month. They think everyone should wipe their bums. It's ridiculous. But I think it's like just showing gratitude for what you've already done and looking back and being like, okay, I'm grateful for this. I did that. There's no one else in this position that's been able to achieve what you've done. And I think it's just writing down shit you're grateful for and appreciating that because that doesn't come off as braggy. I think maybe...

one thing that I've caught myself doing whenever I'm talking to like friends either they're back home whatever else and or like even my family I'm telling them what I'm doing I feel braggadocious because I'm like oh I'm just kind of like throwing it in their face and that's the hardest thing but it's also like well f*** like I did it you gotta be proud of yourself you gotta sit there and be like

and like, oh shit, I don't want to tell them about my wins because I'm afraid how they're going to react. If they're a good person and a good friend and someone, like I could tell Dom anything and he's like excited for me. Right. Like genuine, there's no hint of jealousy, shit like that. I think it also comes down to like,

who you're telling this information to. - 100%. - 'Cause a lot of people would try and chop you down. It's a big thing in Australia. It's called tall poppy syndrome. Or like it's, the better analogy is like crabs in a bucket. If you put a bunch of crabs in a bucket, if one tries to get out, the crabs will pull it back down. So like, it's something that I've had to like work on as well as being like, how can I surround myself with the people that are actually excited for me? - Yeah. - People that want to see you win. - Dude, dub you friends real quick. - Yeah, really.

Back to hot cogs. Back to hot cogs and funny shit. So I got something. Dom, you might already know because Harry's your boy, right? I have an Australian lingo quiz. Okay. So basically...

So my idea, right? I want P to try to guess what these things mean. And then you can either tell him what not. And if you don't know either, you're both like, I don't know either. Then I got the definition right here. Okay. Okay. So we're going to start simple, P. So you're going to guess some of Harry's, some of his lingo, some of his things, right? Okay. First one.

Arvo. Arvo? Arvo. Sounds like a damn vehicle. What is that? Arvo? Can I get in the Senate? Don't forget to go to the store in the Arvo. In the Arvo? In the Arvo. Like the car? No. You know what it is? Yeah, he's got it. What's an Arvo? It's afternoon. Afternoon. Arvo. Why?

It's quicker to say. We're saving so much time. In the Alvo. Yeah. There you go. Okay. So now that you understand, you're going to be very bad at this. This is bad. Okay. Let's keep going. Here we go. Okay. Next one. Cobber, I believe it is. Cobber. Sentence, please. Sentence. Good day, Cobber. Where are you headed to? Cobber?

Carbo. Carbo. C-O-B-B-E-R. A cobber. Yeah, a cobber. Like a friend. Yeah. Hey, there you go. There you go. Cobbers used to refer to a wonderful friend. I love that. These are my cobbers. No. Cobbers. There you go. My cobs. What about a drongo? Oh, a drongo? A drongo. A drongo. That's a kangaroo. What? Coffins. Yeah, the coffins. He's a kangaroo.

Oh, you call people that? An idiot. Sentence. That's pretty cool. It refers to a fool or a stupid person. I don't like how you directed that towards me. There we go. I think it's... Would it be either bathers? I'm assuming bathers. Bathers, yeah. Yeah, that one right there. Yeah, bathers. Sentence. I need a sentence. No, you gotta guess. You gotta try to guess four. Bathers? I'm thinking bathtub. Like you're getting in the bath. A bather. Close. Close, honestly.

Because this sentence gives it away like that. Okay. So just try to guess. Bather. It's a noun. I don't know what that is. Yeah, what's a noun? A person, place, or thing. So it's an item. Oh, it's an item. It's not like a... Like soap. It's soap. No. No. Why would you guess that? Do you know what it is? Yeah, Dom, if you don't know, I want you to guess too. Bathers. It's swimsuit, though. Yeah, there you go. Damn it. Dom damn near has his... Yeah, I know. Well, my first show was from Australia and...

Fair Dinkum. Fair Duncan. Fair Duncan. Fair Dinkum. And I can't get a sentence. Fair Dinkum. What do you think you're doing? Fair Dinkum. Hey, dude. Hey, Fair Dinkum.

It sounds like a king. Like, I don't know, a fair dinkum? Like, that's fair dinkum on the podium up there. That's fair dinkum, Jason. Fair dinkum? You're going to have no clue on this one. Dom, you have any clue? I don't know. I think that's like... I'll give you all one hint. It's an expression, so it's not a noun. It's not like a... It's not a thing, but it's an expression. But you said it in a sentence. Fair dinkum. What do you think you're doing? Oh, hell.

No. He said, oh, hell. It's like a good thing. Oh, hell. You don't just change the way you said it. You put your arm up. It doesn't make any difference. So it says, fair dinkum is an expression. It's the same as, like, honestly. Like, honestly, like, what are you doing? Oh, fair dinkum. Fair dinkum. Yeah. Fair dinkum. Okay. No wookas. That sounds a little racial.

Well, we spell it W-A-K-K-A-S. No Whackas. No Whackas. No Whackas. Ain't no problem. That's pretty close. Fair Whackas. Big Whackas. Oh, Big Whacka. No, I'm saying no Whackas. Yeah.

So it stands for, you pretty much said it. Hell yeah. It's like no worries. No worries, brother. Y'all do that? Yeah. I thought that was a Hawaiian thing. Well, same, same. Okay, here we go. No, really. He said same, same. Pash. Pash. Or is it posh? Posh. Pash. No sentence here. Pash. It's a verb. And you can get a pash rash. Oh, it's an STD. No. No. No. Okay. Yeah, I'm close. You probably could, honestly. Oh, a pash. That's like...

Oh, that's a dirty person. Okay, here's your sentence. That's completely wrong. You said if you kiss a dirty person. You could have a pash with a dirty person. We only had one bottle of beer before we started a pash. That's your sentence. Oh, to make love. Like, simmer it down. Take that, but like, divide by two. Wait, what do you think? There you go. You get a pash rash. Didn't I say that? No. No.

What'd I say? You said to make love or STD. That's what you said. That was close enough. A pass rush is if you kiss him for so long, your face gets red. I've never had that. You said you gotta start kissing. Yeah. I lead with tongue. Not a lot of lips. Okay, here we go. It's like I'm trying to get inside of an oyster. You know what I mean? I love a good tongue kiss. I want to feel what you ate for breakfast. Okay. Okay, this one says swag. So obviously it's not that swag.

This one is a noun though, it's not an expression. Swag, like... So it's not our swag. Put the swag away before the guests arrive. Oh, the trash. He said, oh, the trash, clearly. The dirty laundry. No. What? Dom, any idea? This one's... The swag? Swag. He said it cool. He said it cool. He said swag. Swag. You gotta put the swag away. Yeah, the swag. Oh, f***.

Oh, your cock? In Australia, the term swag is a roll-up single bed or it could also be a foldable bed.

Why would I know that? We have Swags. It's kind of like a sleeping bag, but it has a mattress. Almost like an air mattress or something like that? Yeah, but you roll it up and it kind of just looks like a big... It's crazy. And you just sleep on the ground. I don't know why we do it in Australia because there's so much bad shit. Yeah, it's like outdoors if you're going to an outdoor party. Outdoor party. Three more. Last three. This one should be easy. It's a whole different language. Simply Shreya.

Estrella. Estrella.

Like somebody from Australia. Beautiful. Really? It says Australia is used short for Australia. Most locals use it when talking about their beloved country. I know. Beloved? Yeah. That's what it says. Beloved country? It says we have the finest beaches here in Australia. Y'all have a national anthem? Yeah. What? What are you f***ing... I didn't know if that was just an us thing. I didn't know. That's a good question. That's a horrible question. The whole world... Did you just watch the Olympics? When Australia won all those women? Well, no. We had that conversation at the Olympics when I was like...

Like, did you have to, like, stand up and say you're not? Because I feel like that's a very American thing. Y'all did? Y'all stood up? Yeah. So we're all in one big cult. Nice. No, but I feel like Americans, like, American, you guys do, like, the whole, like, count, what is it, the arms, count of arms? What do you guys do? That's for, like, uh... Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah.

Is that not? I've never done that. No, I know. He's talking about when, for like a football game or something like that, when they come out, the color, the honoring of colors, whatever the hell it's called. They come out with the guns and the flags and stuff. No, no, no. Okay, there's the national anthem. National anthem. And then there's the other thing.

Pledge of Allegiance. To the Texas Pledge of Allegiance. But that's a state thing. Yeah, I think we have 50 different pledges to our allegiance of our state. Jesus. Yeah, that's some crazy shit. That's cold. I pledge allegiance to our flag of the United States of America. Wait, that's Texas. I pledge allegiance to Texas? No, what is the... We have a Texas one. Yeah. Why are we looking at him? To the state...

I don't know. You have to do a hucka. You have to learn a hucka. Dude. Okay. What's that? No. There's no way you don't know what a hucka is. You know what a hucka is. You ever seen a hucka? I'm not going to do it. Is it disrespectful if I like do it? No, you're fine. I'm also not moldy, so. Yeah. But they do the whole, the little, like,

like the oh yeah yeah i've seen that it's really cool so we have always wanted to learn that and i don't know if i'm allowed to no you can learn it like i think it's just a part of the culture again i could be completely wrong but like when i went to school there we had to learn like the national hooker and then that the school hooker and then our house hooker so we had like three and we do it before like rugby games and stuff and i just felt out of place because i was like i'm probably saying the words wrong i probably look like a goose

But it was really interesting. It was really crazy. And the videos, so like if someone comes back from school or something, like their daughter's been in college in the States for like four years and they go back and they greet them at the airport, dude, they're always emotional. Always emotional. I think I just reposted one. It's intense. Like it's so intense. It's really beautiful. It's beautiful as hell. I love that. We should do something like that. I know. We don't want to do... I mean, I'm not going to sit here and talk down, but it's like...

That shit's just cool. Yeah, funerals for us are kind of lame. Like, I was a stand-in pallbearer for my grandma who died of cancer. What? No, it's okay. So the way it's tied right. No, it's my grandma. It's a new method that I learned. I used to put my hair through the loops, but I figured. She was a lot heavier than I thought.

I swear to God, I love her. I almost caught a cramp. Try not to laugh. You ever? Okay. Well, let me get off of it if it's making people uncomfortable. It's my grandma. It's my grandma. Yeah, the Moldy King passed. This is the funeral they just had for him. Look at that shit. Bro, they're all in sync. Yeah, it's wild. Like, it's such a beautiful culture as a new queen.

That's so good. It's cool. It's like a marble move. So when people would leave school or go to a different school or a teacher would leave, the whole school would do it to them. Really? It's crazy. Yeah. They didn't do it when I left because I got kicked out. Next time you see one on TikTok. Huh? Wait, what? What'd you say? They didn't do it to me because I got expelled. So whatever. What'd you get expelled for? You got expelled? I was doing some bad stuff. I got like, you know, we streaked at the sister college in like pink G-strings and like balaclavas. And then one of the boys got caught and ratted on us.

And then there was like this one day, whatever. I'm not going to say that one because that will get me canceled. But anyway, I got expelled and I had to live in a tent for two weeks outside of school while I finished our final exams. And then I think I just like failed them. Because I was in New Zealand and my family's in Australia. Yeah.

And my parents were like, we spent so much money on you to be at this school and you just f***ed up so bad. So go live in a tent. So that was fun. I don't know why that triggered me so bad. I got kicked out of all the schools in Australia. So they were like, you have to go to this other one in a different country. But why the f*** were you in a teepee? Why are you in a tent? Because they didn't want to spend any more money on me because you're a piece of s***. You kept f***ing

Why did you have to go fight that kid? Why did you have to go get naked at the sister college in front of the mayor and all the police force? And one of the kids got tackled and then he ratted on everyone. So what age was this? I was 17. 17. Okay. Yeah. Always been a wild boy. Yeah, it was crazy. I thought we got away with that too. But then I guess like who's the skinny six five rat? Like the big muscly...

Some mowing boys running through the... He's like, I couldn't keep up. I wasn't the one that snitched. I think it was... Yeah. So, that. Anyway. But, yeah. It was a tough time. Yeah. That's crazy. What's the tradition called? The haka. Haka. Yeah. Whenever our principal left in high school, a bunch of kids just keyed his car. So...

I guess, yeah, tradition in some ways. I guess so. Yeah. I'm going to leave you a mark. You know what I mean? Never forget that. Yeah.

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We have a thing we do. It's called Reddit questions. Yeah, I know Reddit's probably not y'all's best friend. Yeah, I did hear that pretty quick. He said, it is gone. There's actually a thread that says, why Dom is the worst? And with like a shit ton of comments. It's like an eight paragraph essay. It's insane. And it's like,

Because Dom and Harry are best friends, I'm going to be using Harry as an example. And it's like everything that Harry's done, everything that I've done, and why I'm worse. That sucks. What does that person do for you? Do you actually spend time reading that?

Yeah, sometimes when I want to feel something. Yeah. He's like, it's either that or Blue Chew and Guardians of the Galaxy. Come out of the castle, Uncle Harry with that. Hey, come out of the castle. Or just sit in his room. Cry. Cry. You're like, bro, hate comments on Blue Chew night? That is wicked. Yeah, he gets hard first. He goes to the press. Loves his feeling.

24 hours in an apartment with y'all sounds wicked. Like that sounds... Yeah, what are you guys doing tonight? Tons of laughs. I think I'm busy tonight. No, I think we're pretty clear. I think it's pretty fun. Okay, first Reddit question is, what is something random that you find attractive in people? Like something obscure. Like their feet.

You're a foot guy. I don't mind suckin some good morning to you. Well, like actually if it goes like French tips Oh

I chose this ring. I chose, I'm like, I chose this ring. No, but I'm saying like, either French tips or all white nails. Like, pristine. Like, I really don't, fingernails, I don't mind if you get colors. He's crying. Fingernails, I don't care if you get colors and designs like that. It always looks good. But toes, bro, give me French tips or all white. Like, I just think it looks just like clean. Kerry's like, yeah. He's like, we got to talk. Yeah.

I like obscure. I like big teeth. Sorry Like a horse mouth like a low Okay, what? What girls have you dated with massive teeth? Like a beaver? No, no, I said like a like not like a big buck I'm just saying like when they have like really nice like big white like a big white. Why'd you say white again?

We don't want yellow teeth. What is going on bro? I see what you're saying. I see what you're saying. Like a big, like a presentable amount. Yeah, like yeah.

Like big teeth with like, you know, nice, nice. Okay. Good morning to you. How are we feeling?

Like, nice big teeth with, like, you know when they got, like, the chubby cheeks and they smile and it's, like, really nice. It's like... Yeah, a little face deal. Mine would be... I miss her so much. Okay. We can spend some time on it. Huh? You can talk to her if you want. You can talk to her? Yeah. Which one? All right, by the way. We can't do this. You can't. He did that to me yesterday. Um...

He had to lock in. I got to lock in. I got to lock in. Daniela. What? Oh, shit. Why'd you say that, Nate? What? Sorry. Should I not have done that? I thought I was being vulnerable. I felt safer. Either or. No, you're safe. Are you going to use this for villainous reasons? Oh, no. Never that. Okay, go again. Daniela. Daniela, if you're watching this, I miss you. And if you have any time coming up, I'd love to take you to Disneyland and buy you whatever you want. You hate Disneyland. What? What?

Yeah, I know I have really bad memories But I want to have a good time I want to have a good memory it is bad memories at this event I'll have a good time at Disneyland. Let's go. No, I'm not going to do I'm not going with you. That's what we're not going

We're not going to f*** this. Why? This is one place we're not going. Yeah, where is this? What happened to Disneyland? I know you love Disneyland. You've had some great times at Disneyland. I've had terrible times at Disneyland. I also have a good time at Disneyland. Daniela, you're awesome. You're great. And if you see this, I love you. Of course. Good job. Daniela, give him a ring. Here we go. I like a good non-slip shoe on a girl. Like if her...

A nun slip. Like a sandal? No, like those Walmart all black. You know what I mean? Like she works in like a waffle house. He's got weird things, brother. Weird things. Like an all black nun slip. Yeah.

Non-slip shoes? It shows hard work and dedication and loyalty. Like a bloodstone? What do you mean non-slip? No, like, you know, she busts tables for a living. And she has to wear non-slip shoes and an apron. So you go to a cheesecake factory and you're like, she's the one. I don't want a bartender. I don't want the hostess. I want the girl in the back. You know what I mean? The dish pig. The dish pig? Is that what you guys call her? The dish pig?

That's what they call them in Australia. I was a dish pig growing up. You know what I call that? That sounds so degrading. Well, because you're cleaning the dishes.

Whatever. Dish pick? No. Dishwasher? Yeah. Is that what you call it? Dishwasher? Or a bus girl. A busser? Yeah. She's on the bus? A busser. Bus? Right? Buster. No, I think it's bus. B-U-S-S. Why bus? No, it might be bus. Bus. Who's busser? That's what the act of cleaning the table is. Like bust the table, yeah. Bussy? Bussy. Where'd you get bussy? Now we're talking. Now we're spelling it out. Bus. Is this short for bussy?

They put a bussy on the table? Is it a bus or bust? It's a bust. I don't think it's a bust. Because you're busting something. But a bust is also like a front porch. Like that's a bust. A front porch? You mean bust? Yeah. What do you call it? It's a front porch. It's a front porch.

- It's in the front porch in the back door. - It's in front of the house. - That's where the baby's coming out of. - Baby cam. - Here we go. - Okay. - Wait, you pregnant? - Mm-hmm. - What? - You didn't know that? - We can talk about this. - I think we did. - Yeah. - It was when you were sitting in the chair and you were sitting there going, I was. - Yeah.

I know you were, you did tell me. Yeah, when I tried to chase you with a needle. Congratulations, by the way. Thank you. I want what you have so bad. I was like, no, no, okay. I know I said this earlier, but God, I wouldn't give anything to have someone that loves me in a shot on the way. This is something I should ask you in private. Daniel, you're still here. It just takes one time. It is true, but...

Why are you shaking my hand? You're not just a formalist. What? Oh, goodness gracious. Okay. You know what they say? What? If God wanted you to wear condoms, he would have made condom treats. I feel like anything's a condom if you try hot enough.

wear protection kids well not kids but like kids sitting in your door dogs in Hollywood for one day Jesus Christ get out brother but I have a question for you I should have asked you this in private or like maybe when it's just us around am I in the running for God father of your child great question and be honest don't lie

100% honestly, we haven't had a single conversation about it, but I would definitely say... That's a lie. That's a lie. That's a lie. I swear to God. You don't talk about everything. And I swear to God, Godparents is like completely... We haven't even talked about it once. Yeah. In terms of guys, yes. I don't know. What about us? I'd probably say... Yeah. Set up your boy. Yeah.

I was there during a near-death experience. No, but I would say definitely in terms of guys. I mean, you already know who it would be for guys. I don't know who girls are. Probably both sides sisters. Really? So, I wouldn't say Liv has like an overwhelming girl best friend.

I think it's supposed to be, yeah, like one. It's basically in terms, you know what it is, right? Yeah, I am one. Are you really? Yeah, Godfather. Oh, shit, that's sick. He's a baby. His name's Rocky. He's the best. Who are the parents to you? Sonny and Dre. Oh, they're like my best friends. That's sick. Congrats. That's sick.

Yeah, I would say for sure. Okay, thank you. For sure. That's good. We'll see you in about. You could do what I did. Or no, what my friend did. He had a kid and-

And I'm the godfather. Yeah, I was about to say, raffle him off. Yeah. I'll pick it out of that. Hey! He made me the godfather because we've been best friends since we were like three years old. Oh, throwing that word around again, huh? What? Okay. Well, you did it first. We're learning a lot here today. You did it first.

But he was like, he said, he has an older brother. He was like, you're the golf boy, but you know if something were to actually happen, it's going to my brother. And I was like, completely understand. We're in two different places. We're in two different points in our life. I'd be offended by that. It's not going to my brother. No. No, Jolly. I don't know where you are. No, shut up. Peace and love. Love you, brother. But you're not getting my kid. Oh, let's stay on the kid topic real quick. Let's do it.

Wild question for me. Wild. Timeline for the three of you. If it was completely up to you, what are we thinking? Check out this. He said nine months from Thursday night.

P? Harry? That's a dumb question. I'm not having kids. What? He's lying to all three of us right now. All four of us. Well, I can, but I won't. I was going to say, what do you mean by that? I don't know. He's going to have them, but at a later season. No, they're going to come. Not on purpose. Yep.

Good morning. Why is that sounding? It sounds like you're going to do something. Just like you. You know what you're doing. Check your water. I'm blue chewing it.

Anyway. No, I think before I'm 30. My mom said I wasn't allowed to have kids until I'm 30, but I've got three years. That's prime age. Yeah, I want to be a young, hot dad. There we go. I've got three years to figure it out. Okay, he's bullshitting, but he used to say when it was just us, he would say kind of that same range. He said anywhere from 30 to like 32. Yeah. That's his prime, what he thinks as of now. Life can change, but... I just...

I don't know. I'd have to find a woman first. Well, no shit. Well, it's gotta help work. Yeah, but that's the hard part. You know what I mean? Clean that dick and you'll be fine. There we go. Take a shower. Take a shower and stop shitting around him. He'll be good. Yeah. I don't know. Why are you bumming on that? You're fine. What?

it also doesn't excite me to have kids like i don't know it's gonna be the best it's gonna yeah you're gonna be eating that yeah i think the dopest would be like i think like

Drake has a sick situation obviously because he's Drake games a lot of money but I think like being a single parent and like being like rich and having a lot of money is kind of like being a single dad you think yeah I mean

I think it would be like if you're a single dad, right?

Obviously, if you have a woman that loves you like you do, you know what I'm saying? I've never met your wife, but I'm sure she's an amazing woman. But if you're a single dad, you still get to travel. And if you have a good co-parenting situation, you get to travel and live your life. If you are someone who's like,

I saw John Cena talk about how like he doesn't want to have kids because he's like very like he's like I'm selfish there's a lot of things I want to do in life I just don't give a kid what a kid would need the time but it's like if you're a single dad with a good co-parenting situation it's like being able to do stuff with that kid while still being able to like live your life is kind of like a dope situation that would be cool

See? That would be cool. It's not going to happen, but... We need to go and literally talk for hours. And they'll sway your mind. I don't know. You don't give a shit what I say. When's the last time you held a baby? I've never held a baby. Never touched one. Never shook one's hand. No, I f***ed that, though. I don't hold people's babies that I don't share blood with.

Even if I wouldn't do it. That's too much responsibility. Really? And I touched, okay, so on tour. Touched what? Touched the baby. I shook one's hand. So like we're on tour and this lady in the front row, she was like screaming like Peyton, hold my baby, hold my baby. It was kind of like to the point where like I had to acknowledge her. And so I was like, come on, bring her. And the whole crowd was like chanting like, hold the baby. And I refused to hold it, but I shook its hand and I swear to God it felt like a frog.

And I was like, after that, I don't want one of these. Really? I can't. I'm so excited to be a dad. That's awesome. There we go, Harry. Yeah. It's really just you, P. But look, I get it because I used to be freaked out by babies because I'd stare at them and be like, you've got your whole life ahead and you have no idea what's coming up. And I'd get so afraid of them. It's just like kind of looking at the stars. It scares me. I don't want to do it. But I used to be like that. And then my godson and my sisters, they all squirted out kids. And I was like, you know what?

I just like love this. It's just fun. Like, especially when it's like your godfather or an uncle, because then you just like they have to deal with it. Like it's dirty bum. Yeah. And whatever else you love it. Yeah. Like hold it. And maybe whenever his kid comes out around it all the time, it will change. We've already said this multiple times. We think it's going to like not like a paradigm shift. We definitely think you're going to like.

get a little softer side once the baby's here. What if I don't like your kid? I don't even think that's possible. You love both me and Liv way too much to not love what we create. This thing's still got the umbilical cord on it. This is my job. I mean, you have to think, it's literally half me, half Liv. How could you not love? I love both of y'all a lot. Exactly. Too random. We do a lot of would you rathers. What happened to the Reddit story?

We try to structure this shit So these are completely random they don't correlate nothing what are you guys laughing at?

I think he's finally getting his out. The three of us, dude, I was... Dude, I'm wet. I'm soaked. What? I'm wet. Come on. I'm in a blue suit. Sorry. They're going to pay you for that. I'd be plugging it. No, our ad people are going to be like, come on. Here we go. Okay. Would you rather have a permanent thick unibrow or... What the...

No matter how many times you shave it, nothing's always there. Permanent thick unibrow or you randomly get kidnapped by a pack of ninjas. Careful. Once. Yeah, brother. Once a month. What? Ninjas.

Ninjas. I hear you. I'd rather be kidnapped. Once a month. That'd be fun. What are they doing with the ninja? Let's say it's 24 hours. They take you for a whole day. You could be with your family. It could be at nighttime. They could bust into your apartment. That'd be so sick. I'm getting kidnapped every... Can I up it? Yo, the amount of aura you would get when you're hanging out with your boys and you get kidnapped by ninjas? That is kind of cool. That is kind of cool. And then you come back and they're like, what the...

Thanksgiving where like the family's fighting whatever else you just get smuggled out of there and you just get to hang out with ninjas like slicing watermelon. What are you picking? Well, my biggest fear is being kidnapped. So it definitely the unibrow. I can pull it off.

I'd be like a model. You do it. Isn't there a basketball player that has a unibrow? Anthony Davis. The brow. The brow. That's what they call him? Yeah. I mean, he kind of just took it and ran with it. That's crazy. Yeah. All right. Next one. Here we go. Would you rather have a constant irritating itch in the middle of your back or every pair of shoes you own or will ever buy are two sizes too small? Oh, I'm already insecure about him. He's got a size 15 flip is I got a size 12. So I'm getting the itch.

Yeah, it's already hard enough to hit your shoes. Always have an itch in the middle of your back that you can't get or RIP to your toes. Yeah, give me an itchy back. Yeah, give me the back. Yeah, I feel like at a certain point, you'd just be normal. Like, it would just feel like, yeah, I got that itch. Yeah, you get one of those, like, Amazon back scratches. It starts moving. You go to scratch, it's like, you can't hit it. I might go shoes, honestly. How tight is that on you? No, that would be hard.

- Does it change if we go two sizes too big? - I would pick the two, yeah. - I'd go too big. - If I'm telling what size your feet, I'm like 17. - Yeah, right? - They would be even more disappointed. - You go, yeah, Guardians of the Galaxy 3. - Hey, give him a back tap. He needs to pick me up. - He's a muscular man. - Thank you. - He's a strong boy. - Okay, so y'all.

You love the gym, right? Yeah. Was it just your athletic background? What makes you want to stay in the gym now? Like full, like grown man, everything, obviously. You just got great genetics. Yeah, I don't work out. I just go there, just soak in the aura. Yeah, just soak in the energy. Take a couple mirror pics. Just get to my daily fix.

I just am now starting to get over my fear of the gym. Why were you afraid? What are you going on about? What? Do you talk to him? I'm telling you. That's why I said we need a yo.

Y'all need to just say everything I've already said and apparently he'll hear it from me. Why are you afraid of the gym? Who hurt you? I don't like being that vulnerable. Like, he gets on his knees in the gym. Sorry? Okay. What are you doing? Okay. What gym? Wicked. Wicked things. Do you not? Sometimes. Okay. For like a tricep extension. We're all big girls. We're all tall. Some of the cables, they're not. Like, I can't even get a stretch. I never get on my knees in a gym. I had to. I'm embodying it. I know who I am. I know what I got and I know what I like.

Good morning to you. Good morning to you. But I just can't, like, he wanted to do sled pools. There's turf in the middle of our gym. Yeah. Like, it's, like, dead in the middle. There's people to the right, left, front, and behind. He's like, let's do sled pools. I was like, I can't, bro. Slow that bitch up and said it. Didn't you who? Yeah, but that was my team that I was with. I'm around them all the time. These are strangers. Yes, thank you. He doesn't like doing any. It's a public gym. He basically doesn't like doing anything in front of anyone he doesn't know. You got pissed in front of people. You can't brush your teeth in front of people. Now you can't work out. A little crazy, brother. Yeah, I don't shit in public.

You didn't shit in public? No. He'll literally wait until he gets back to his house. I'm talking like, we could be gone for 10 hours. He'll be holding the shit. That's very unhealthy. I'm shitting on the floor. Yeah. I will shit and have a conversation with the guy that's still next to me. Yeah, I'll look you in the eyes as he's wiping me. Yeah. It's just the vulnerability part of it. Like, I'm not, I can't do it. You need to do like a naked retreat or something. Yeah. You know, like, you gotta do some like ayahuasca. We know this guy. We know this guy. You know?

Yeah, we know this guy named Will. Will Butterfield. Check his Instagram or his Twitter. Him and his boys will go in the woods in Vancouver and just hug each other naked. Oh, God, I think I'll pass on that one. I think I'll be sick that week. He'll get you right. He's got the best Instagram ever. It's called NotWillButterfield. He's my favorite person on the app. It's a hidden gem. He has like 20,000 followers. It's insane. We've been saying each other his videos for months. Yeah, he's the best. He's awesome. So he's just naked?

Yeah. Pretty much. And then he'll be on Instagram like this.

And then he'll be like, "Now, Pan, we know why you'll ask 20K." He'll be like, "Brother, he'll be like, 'Pill back your foreskin and squeeze your fremulum,'" and then be like, "Hum, and do this." It's incredible. Sometimes he'll be like shitting and pissing while he's like talking to the camera. It's crazy. He'll be like, "You just hear this shit fly." You gotta hang out with him, because he'll get you right. Yeah, he'll get you right, brother. I'll need therapy after hanging out with him. Okay. Calls you, "Yeah, Hummus Cannon, Stink Portal, Bearded Clam."

He's got some good say. He's the best. Honestly, it's the best content I've ever seen in my life. I would recommend him as a guest. I would recommend him. Can we please have him on? That would have to be a Patreon. If you had an option between him and... He would come in naked. That'd have to be on Patreon. That'd probably have to live on Patreon. Yeah, he's the best. Okay, there's this thing we do. Oh, hell yeah. On the podcast. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we're doing it. Yeah, we're doing it. I don't want to do it. Um...

So I have a really weird palate, like food palate. What is happening? No, okay, but y'all are just... Also, why are these segments just like... Bro. It's like SNL bits. I'm telling you, that's our brains. I need help. I dropped out of school because of that. I couldn't focus, but we do...

It's like fun fact. Anyway, so right back to it. No one answered my question about the pallbearer. Have y'all ever done that before? You held up a casket? Yeah. It sucks. Especially doing it involuntarily. Grandma was heavy. So we're doing this bit. You didn't want to do it? You got subbed in? I didn't know. I literally showed up to the funeral and they were like, you got to carry Meemaw. And I said, why? Who's Meemaw? My dead grandma died of cancer. She's okay. Well, she wasn't, but now she's okay. Yeah. There you go. Whatever. You ever had a homie ask if there's going to be girls there?

Yeah. At a funeral. Oh, just at a funeral? No. Oh, yeah. That guy needs a seven-day sabbatical. I promised you we were going to do this segment. So I have a weird food palette. Like, I eat like a five-year-old, but then I'm very experimental with my food. And I like weird snacks. Have you ever had a salt and pepper banana before? Sorry? A salt and pepper banana. Nah. But, like, yeah, though.

good morning to you what is happening yeah but i know no no banana no because like like one of my favorite like childhood things that like i would make would be like a peanut butter i'd make a sick peanut butter jelly sandwich but with like banana and then i put salt on it so like i i could i see that i see the vision that sounds gas i see the vision one time it's all right i wasn't there but wait i think this comes from marijuana a lot of these you know what i mean yeah so

- Now I know why you're in the kitchen with salt and pepper on a banana. How can we make this better, brother? - Well, your grandma, she said she does it too. - She put us on, not on marijuana, but on the salt and pepper banana. - She said, "Yeah, dude, we used to do it back in the day. We put salt and pepper on all our fruits." I was like, that's sick. - Why people got some like goaded like food, little gems type shit. - Yeah. - Shepard's pie. - Dude, that made my breath hot the other week.

don't make no sense. It's just layers of food. And it's fire. And then also white people just call anything a casserole. Oh my God. You just put pasta and then anything in it? Put it in the oven, casserole. Yeah. Oh my God. You just put shit in a casserole. Season it a little bit. That's a casserole? For 435 minutes, that's a casserole. That's a casserole right there. We call that Thursday casserole. This is awesome though. This is my culture, guys. Why are you joining in, bro?

We're going to try one of my weird concoctions right now. We might have to bring that table over here, to be honest, if we can. But we're going to try, and let me know if you've done it. I'm like, everybody. He loves Zitos. Could you imagine? It'll look the exact same he did over there. Good Lord. No, we're going to try pickle and peanut butter. Sorry? You ever had a pickle, put some peanut butter on it, ate it? I think I've never had a pickle. No.

Maybe in a burger. You've never tried a raw picky? What? A raw pickle is sick. Oh, my God. God, it's good. Is this code for something? A raw pickle is sexy. Remember the bag pickles?

- Bagged pickles? - Not even the bagged, no those are the little bites, the little bite ones. You can just grab a spear and put it around your mouth and chop it off. - What? A spear? - There's a lot in your window. - It could be a pickle spear. - We got Vegemite at Tim Tams. I'm chilling in Australia. - Vegemite's the nastiest shit I've ever eaten. - You guys can shut the up. This is my culture. - Matter of fact, real quick, super quick before we do it. How do you eat Vegemite? And then I'll tell you how we ate it. And you can tell us if we did more. - You guys definitely did it wrong if you're that angry. - It's fucking bad. - Toast, a lot of butter, a little bit of Vegemite,

Okay, so we did we we kind of went open jar spoonful straight to me. That's ridiculous. Yeah I love Vegemite, but I'll never do that. It smelled like a gerbil like a pet. What's its yeast? Oh my god. It's not my dog's paws. Yeah his dog has a yeast. I can't bring that table right down here. This is a

Like a delicacy in my house. Okay. Oh, wow. Who invented this? Oh, weed. What the f*** is it? It's pickles. You've really never had pickles? Kosher dill spears? Yeah, it's a dill pickle. Yeah, here you go. Put that right there.

Why'd you moan when you were here? We're in LA, so they don't have regular peanut butter here. Almond butter. $15, dawg. Yeah, where'd you go? What's it called? Pink Dot. Dawg, what? You got a Ralph's. Go to Trader Joe's or something. We should've done that. We're gonna try this. Alright, let's do it. Grab you a little picky. Yeah, you guys go first. I don't know how to do this. It stinks, bro.

- Pickles? - It stinks. - Well just try a pickle first without the peanut butter. - Nah, you gotta raw dog it, bro. - Yeah, I just wanna see you try a picky. - Brother. - Dude, that smells fantastic. - That smells so good. - Mm-hmm. - It smells good? - Yeah, go ahead. - There's a pickle like-- - That stinks. - There's no way. - That stinks. - There's no way, Harry.

Just eat it brother. It's a pickle. Yeah, go for it. Yeah So pickles just cucumber they put it in I mean regular stuff like this would be a cucumber like vinegar but No, it's cucumber It's pickled cucumber

I thought it was a zucchini. Am I an idiot? Am I a dumbass? I feel like you would be well versed in the pickle. I think it's a cucumber. And then you grab this. You grab your peanut butter. No, you're right. It is a cucumber. There's going to be a lot of oil at the top of that, Pete. That's why I'm holding it down there. That doesn't look right. Go ahead and mix that real quick.

It's good, guys. I know y'all look very concerned. I just love how he's slapping that foot.

So then you take the pickle, you take the peanut butter, and you just... And you do that? Why'd you moan again? Look at that juice. You make me want to slap your mom. What? We're all going to try it together. Don't look like that. Trust me. I don't want to slap my mom. That makes me want to slap my mom? My mother's great. She's been through enough. She doesn't need to be slapped.

This is this is oh Dom's a warrior. Why didn't you get the pickle in the... Oh man this is... Oh it's gonna be rough. That's a good spread Dom. Damn it Dom that's a good spread. Oh be careful. What's with the... A lot of moaning. I'm telling you so many innuendos. Oh you're getting to it. Should I just do that? You guys don't want to listen to this? I'll just go the same way as you. We're a bunch of sick creeps.

These are the wettest pickles I've ever encountered, by the way. These are some wet pickles. It's appropriate for the situation. You didn't like the picky? It was like I wouldn't buy it and have it by myself. It smelled like my ex's ass.

No, not a specific X. It was just words. Yeah, I made that clear, bro. Yeah, that was just words. It was a joke. All right, so the first time everybody here is trying peanut butter and pickle combination. I promise you it's good. On the count of three, let's enjoy. Let's do it for us, Nectar. Cheers, brothers. Hey, think about it.

It tastes like a dugout. Like I'm at a baseball game. Like I'm chewing sunflower seeds. Yeah, it tastes like I licked my dog's paws. Brother, what? It's the sweet and salty, like, the texture kind of thing. There was nothing sweet. Yeah. More salty. I might be able to get behind it. Because if you said you did back home with regular peanut butter, I could see that being better. That shit, that was, oh. So y'all didn't like it? No, you creep. I'm not going to go out of my way to have it. Like, maybe it's, like, maybe. Yeah, try again, Don. Wait, is it the peanut butter?

Well, that peanut butter is strange. That's expensive people peanut butter. That's creepy. It's almond butter too. Yeah. But it has the same kind of like... It was still good to me. Yeah, it was like... I mean, it wasn't like... I don't like how y'all are judging me. I just don't know how you... I understand it was a late night and you were real hungry. I've done this sober. Okay, now that's where we draw the line. That's where we draw the line. That's where we're not relating. Yeah, I just want to know...

When you created this, were these the only two options in your fridge at that time? Well, whenever I'm in that headspace, I'm like Picasso in my pantry. I'm like, what can go with what? You know what I mean? Yeah. I did this. And you have jar of pickles in your pantry? Yeah. Insane. Where do you put them? You're supposed to refrigerate them after you open it. You didn't get them. He's like, you never buy it again. You still buy them. I didn't know you're supposed to. This is there for decor. These weren't in the refrigerator at the store. These were on the shelf. After you open it. Whatever. All right, guys. Well, one out of ten. Rate it.

- Four, like max. I can't go higher. I damn sure can't go higher than a four. - Three. - Yeah, I'm feeling. - I'm feeling like 3.5.

Survival rating I'd give it like like a six if I like yeah, absolutely had to yeah, but I'd probably just split them up Yeah, I will say that this is ten times better than Vegemite ever was okay. That's crazy. Yeah Australia's gonna come for you. I love Australia and all my bogans. I love you all no, that's not a good thing Oh, I'm a home. Oh my what's it called? All right guys cook

What, who? Me? No, I door dash everything. I cook a little bit, barely. Not like nothing extravagant by any means. Well, I appreciate you guys coming. It was a fun time. I felt left out. Thanks for having us. Really ended on a high note here. Well, I thought we were going to have like a life-changing experience here. All right, y'all. Total shit was crazy.

Yeah, the total energy shift. I was expecting y'all to love this and thank me. No, that's no shot. All right. Thank you. Next time I'll bring Tim Tams. I want to try those. Yeah. I want to try it. Cam, you get us out of here, buddy. My confidence is gone now. All right, everybody. Appreciate you coming back to another episode. Make sure you leave in the comments. Oh, ooh. Confuse the casuals. Get your good karma. This week's secret code. Mm. Mm. Mm.

We'll make it simple. H-A-D. Take a guess. Had. Had a bad time.

H-A-E. - Harry and Dom. - Harry and Dom. Leave it in all the comments. Leave it on Insta, TikTok. Full link. Leave it everywhere. Confuse the casuals. Get your good karma. But we absolutely love y'all. Guys, remember, one out of ten-- You gotta flip your shoe. It's actually too hard for y'all. - The table. Let's see if you can do it. - What? You gotta flip your shoe on our outro. - So, you're going right here? - Oh, flip it. - When he says it, you're gonna flip it and catch it. - With your hand? - Yep. - Okay. - With your teeth. Alright, guys. Remember, one out of ten koala bears don't make it home to Christmas.

And we will see you next time. What?