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Save on O'Reilly Brake Parts Cleaner. Get two cans of O'Reilly Brake Parts Cleaner for just $8. Valid in-store only at O'Reilly Auto Parts. O-O-O-O'Reilly Auto Parts. Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California. This is the Broski Report with your host, Brittany Broski. Hey guys, welcome back to the Broski Report. Starring me, your host, Brittany Broski. I am the host. And you're not.
But we could come to some form of a contract or arrangement wherein you give me all of your earthly possessions and I let you talk into this microphone for three minutes. Now of course you will be censored and your voice will be modulated much lower than what it is so you will not be recognizable, we will not show your face, and you can't say really anything of substance and after all that I own everything that you've ever owned.
And also if you have a boyfriend, I get to keep him. So think about it carefully. Let me know. Please get back to me by end of day, you know, sort of thing. Like just let me know what you're thinking. Oh my God, they're still kissing. My Kylo Ren and my Mando. Guys, quit. We're live. Seriously, stop. Okay, so I wanted to talk today about a few different things. But to begin, I want to talk today about...
My old favorite books, because since we've come into this new, you know, it's almost a renaissance, a renaissance, if you will, of adult fantasy novels like Court of Thorns and Roses, whatever, like that kind of sparked this. And I still need to read Fourth Wing. It's sold out everywhere and I don't want to order it on Amazon. I want to like go into a bookstore and buy it.
It's this new like wave of people are loving it. It's Game of Thrones for the girlies, even though Game of Thrones is for Game of Thrones for everyone. It's like so it has us by a chokehold. And so I've been thinking a lot about what did I used to read, you know, in high school or in college or even in middle school. Middle school was a big, like heavy reading thing for me. Like that was when Twilight happened. That was when Hunger Games happened. I think
junior year of high school was when the sort of John Green moment happened for me when I read Fault in Our Stars and I was like, I've never experienced this many emotions in the span of three days. Like that was kind of my first emotional whiplash of, oh my god, how am I attached to these people and they're not real. John Green, I cannot believe that that's the same John Green that
is John Green. So, by the way, crazy to think about. That's like, he taught me European history and he made me cry with Augustus and whatever her name was. I want to talk about the books that I obsessed over in middle school first and then high school because I know I will find community with some of y'all. Some of y'all I will find community with here. And if not, go read these books. It's a great time.
Also, if you're looking to be inspired to start reading again, just go to the bookstore and physically buy a book. When was the last time y'all were in a bookstore? And if you're on BookTok, like don't answer that. But for the girls and people that don't read, when was the last time you stepped into a Barnes and Noble and got a little coffee and a donut and walked around and shit your pants in the bathroom there? When was the last time you did that? Go do that this weekend.
It's a blast. And the people that work at bookstores are so, ask them any question. They are some of the smartest people. Like they have opinions on every book. They have opinions on film, TV. Like they're just so cultured because you know, working at a bookstore, like to want to work there, you have to kind of know what's going on to give recommendations and so on and so forth. Sorry, let me just move my big, big ass water bottle. Ass water bottle. Ass water.
So in middle school, the book I was absolutely obsessed with, other than Twilight of course, Twilight I could do a whole different episode on Twilight and Twilight's impact on my psyche as a young impressionable goopy brained middle schooler. I digress. The book that had me by a chokehold dude was City of Bones, the Mortal Instruments series.
Jamie Campbell Bauer played Jace in the movie adaptation. And the movie was so bad and it flopped so fucking hard that they did not make a second one. And it's one of my like guilty play. You know how people watched Emily in Paris. People like it's so bad, but famously it kept getting renewed because people were like, this is so bad. When's the next season? Or what's that other one? Kissing Booth. Like these are objectively bad shows, but they're,
I'm gonna watch it. I'm invested. That's how this kind of came about. Like they just kind of bad job with them. They just didn't make it cool. Like it reading the books. I remember it was so cool. Now I was also what 13 14 and I got lost in this world of they are called shadow hunters. If I'm if I'm remembering correctly and those little these little symbols all over him are called runes.
and you would draw them with like a like a sonic screwdriver like Dr. L and I don't know if they're I don't know if this was the book where some of them were like half angel no the Nephilim yes shadow hunters also known as Nephilim are a secret race of beings who are humans born with angelic blood they are the appointed warriors on earth of the angel Raziel
They are appointed specifically to control and preside over the shadow world as well as over the demons and downworlders who inhabit it." Now that is what I remember. The shadow world. Like demons would come into our realm and be disguised as humans and then the shadow hunters would have to go in and like kill them. But only people who could see the demons could see the shadow hunters.
And so Clary fucking Lily James. Oh, shut up. Oh, she just pisses me off. Emily in Paris gets to kiss and suck on Jamie Kimmel Bower. I don't dude. She got to kiss and suck and lick on him for a little bit. I didn't. It's just like whatever. I don't even care. I'm not even like mad about it at all. I don't even actually care that much.
Lily James gets to kiss everyone. Wait, not Lily James. Lily Collins. Lily James, I'm so sorry, sweetie. Lily James plays Pamela Anderson. I take everything back. Lily Collins is who I'm talking about. Dude, she got to kiss and lick and suck on Jamie Campbell Bower. That is my husband. That is my baby's father. And did I say that about Basil Bloom on the last episode? Yes, I did. Whatever. I can have more than one baby father. I can have more than one baby.
Anyway, he plays the lead in this movie and he is so good. Say what you want. Okay. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh wow. I forgot. He's just striking. I love a bug-eyed man. Maybe because I'm a bug-eyed woman. This is
book was fantastical and magical and i remember in this scene there's one scene where they're in this beautiful greenhouse and uh emily in paris takes him on a date there for his birthday she's like it's your birthday we're gonna celebrate and he's like no one's ever done anything like this for my birthday before oh my god oh my god these are like high quality fucking photos there's this scene where there's this little
circular staircase in this greenhouse for some reason and it's also they're like in New York City or something I don't know but it's this glass greenhouse on the top of a building and she like makes some dinner and all this whatever and it's such a romantic night and then they're on the stairs right here and they're about to kiss and this like Demi Lovato song starts we're being 13 being like that just took me out of it like I was so into it and then I heard Demi Lovato and I was like that's freaking Demi Lovato what the fuck are you doing here
took me out of it completely and then this scene happens where he pushes her up against the door and like kind of tucks her hair behind her ear and like kind of pushes her into the wall and it's so hot he's so much taller than her and jesus really tight it was like so cute and his hair is the perfect length oh i can't think about that i have to watch this movie tonight
Even though this is how they had him dressing, dude. This hooded t-shirt cut off zip up jacket. Let's be so for real. Jamie Campbell Bauer talks bulking up for Mortal Instruments. He's a twink. That is a twinkie straight man. Is he straight? Is Jamie Campbell Bauer married? Dating Joseph Quinn? Girlfriend. Is Jamie Campbell Bauer in a relationship? Jess Maloney.
who is jess maloney oh we're about to get to the bottom of this y'all are about to see me do a full-on deep dive here we go here's the instagram what does she do oh this is so fun what does she do okay oh she photographer what does she do it doesn't say her bio doesn't say her bio is just simply an ice cube okay cryptic okay tagged photos oh my god okay so they they've been dating for a thought oh he's they've been dating for a long time
Oh, so they're both tatted from head to toe and they're both sexy? Oh, so I'm humiliated and devastated? This same thing happened with Cameron Kiesing a few episodes back. Cameron Kiesing from All Star Weekend. Oh, I'm just pissed off. I really, I really thought that like he was about to be single.
Okay, anyway, Mortal Instruments was a great, great book. And it was a whole series and there was like a crazy plot twist at the end of book one that was like, ew, what? And then they fix it, whatever. I really, really enjoyed that book. And I kind of want to read it again as an adult to be like,
was i just horny and 14 or was it actually good that book is one that has like who did this to you like them taking care of each other like jace no like he got hurt she has to clean his wounds like that shit and then it's like candlelight and then they lean in close and he's like ah because she leaned on his arm or whatever it's like that and it's so good
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self okay next that was sort of like the only fantasy book i really read well that's a lie i read city of embers as well which was this crazy dystopian like afterworld uh fiction that was kind of weird me and my mom read it and i remember i was like there's no romance in this i don't give a fuck but there was but they were also like kids and i was like i don't i don't care in high school
And I wish my bestie Taylor was sitting right here behind beside me to attest to this because I put her through the goddamn ringer and back with this bullshit that I'm about to tell you. There is an author named Dan Brown. I was obsessed with every piece of work he had ever written by the ripe age of 15. He wrote The Da Vinci Code. If you've ever heard about this or seen this movie with Tom Hanks, The Da Vinci Code is a very famous book
critically acclaimed you know like everyone had it on their shelf on their fucking coffee table and then he also wrote this book called angels and demons well what i liked about these because when it's not romance for me when it's not romance and pining and who did this to you and there's only one bed we have to share it when it's not that it's academic mystery those are the two sort of uh
categories, scattergories of books that I like to put my books in. One is romance and pining and sex and sucking and licking. And then the other one is academic mystery. Dan Brown really ignited that passion for me. I was, I think I borrowed, I borrowed Angels and Demons
from my uncle. He had this book at his house and I was like, "This looks like tea." Because I was in this Nephilim phase. I was reading a lot about fallen angels and all these because it was romance books. And I was like, "Hmm, angels and demons. This looks fun." And I started reading it and I was like, "This boring is this." And then I sort of dove headfirst into it. I was like, "Oh my god." I really, really enjoyed it.
And so Angels and Demons is about... it follows the same character as in The Da Vinci Code, which I'm about to give you a full, full rundown because you guys have to read these books. So let me kind of pique your interest. The main character's name is Robert Langdon and in the movies he's played by Tom Hanks. He's a very Tom Hanks-esque character. Younger, like late 30s, early 40s Tom Hanks. And in The Da Vinci Code... no, no, no. I'll start with Angels and Demons.
In Angels and Demons, there's a killer on the loose who's doing like religious or Catholic inspired murders of priests, if I remember correctly.
And it's Robert Langdon who has to go on this sort of goose chase, wild goose chase of finding this guy and it's this secret society always. And Dan Brown bases it on kind of real things like the occult and real cults and religious iconography and religious tradition and all these. So it's got a hint of fiction, but it's kind of mainly based on religious practices.
and how fucking weird some of the Catholic stuff is. No offense. And how weird some of the like, you know, I guess southern Christian stuff can be too. Just how when you look at religious tradition from an outside perspective it's like, "What?" So there's a one scene in this movie that traumatized me as a child. There's two. All of the deaths of these priests have to do with the elements for some reason. This killer was trying to send a message and make it fucking poetic and artistic whatever.
one of the priests, Robert Langdon doesn't get to him in time to save him. And he is burned alive in a cathedral, I think like in Rome or something like that, from the feet up, like burned alive. And they show him dying and it traumatized me as a child. And there was a second one where this priest died by earth, quote unquote, and they find him too late as well, where it's this wild goose chase through
the Vatican or through Rome or through wherever and they're in this cathedral and then they get down to the catacombs and the archives or whatever and they're under the church and they open this trap door and there is a single beam of light that is on this priest who has been trigger warning I guess gore impaled and his head has been like
crooked back and his mouth is shoved open and dirt has been shoved like in his throat and up his nose and his ears and his eyes it's just like oh my god and his skin is that you know like pale blue tone it was so traumatizing and i'm sure if i watched it today i'd be like ew that's gross but it's not like that hard to look at but as a child dude it was that scene and then another scene that traumatized me as a child is
I forget which Harry Potter it is, but there's a scene where Harry comes across a Dementor in the forest feeding on a unicorn. Like, had killed a unicorn and was feeding on its blood. And he's like bent over it and then he turns around to look at Harry. That shit traumatized me. Because how could you kill a freaking unicorn? Why would you ever do that? That's literally just a unicorn. What'd he do? He's got silver blood. Why would you kill him?
I was like seven or eight and I was like, I just sleep with all the lights on. I thought the dementors were coming for me, bitch.
Okay, anyway, so that was kind of Angels and Demons. And I'm not going to ruin the end of the book if you want to read it. But it's very, very, very, very good. Now, Da Vinci Code is kind of a similar tone. It's a very like religious undertone, art history undertone. This is honestly, I can pinpoint these books sparking my interest in art history. Because so much of religious history has to do with... Because think about it in the...
early, early ages, like 1100s, 1200s, wherever, up until probably 1700s when literacy became common, the average townsperson could not read. That's also why a lot of pubs and bars in like Ireland, England, Scotland, wherever, it's called like
the fox and the hound or the rabbits whatever, the rabbit and the da da da is because they would have the image of the bar name on there because people couldn't fucking read. So now today obviously it's typed out in English and the signs are in English but that's why that's a fun little piece of Anglican lore if you care. And so anyway the average person couldn't read so
they would teach the teachings of the Bible, the stories of the Bible through stained glass and through art in the Bible and through murals and through frescoes and through these sort of things where you can follow it and have someone explain, you know, through the sermon or through wherever what the story is on the mural. And that's how people would learn.
So these things are associated with, you know, sort of indoctrination, if that's what you want to call religion. Everyone, y'all know my thing on religion. Like, it is a cult. I don't care what it is. It's indoctrination. Specifically, you know, Judeo-Christian religions. But that is sort of, yeah, what sparked my interest in art history.
So the Da Vinci Code is about the Holy Grail being real. The Holy Grail being the cup Jesus drank from at the Last Supper. And they are trying to find it. And someone knows where it is. And there are multiple parties searching for it at the same time. Kind of like, kind of Indiana Jones-y, but a little different. This book is also based on this theory
that come to find out is kind of baseless and not real but it's fun to think about and you never know. It's based on this theory that Jesus Christ was married to Mary Magdalene and not only were they married, she bore children with Jesus. He fathered children so therefore there is a bloodline of Christ's offspring and the story follows someone who is the proposed, you know, child of God
And so this character is revealed to be a descendant and there's a secret society that has protected her identity to keep her safe for like since she's been born and everyone before that. And this theory is called the Jesus bloodline if you want to google it by the way. Very interesting read, probably baseless, absolutely zero evidence. But then that could be argued for all of Christianity as well.
This book also introduced me to the Fibonacci sequence, which is like, this is like nerd shit. Like nerd, four eyes, four eyes, like me to myself saying that. In high school, dude, I was taking a European history class or sorry, world history. I was taking geography and I was taking Spanish, which in Spanish, they teach you Latin to understand more of Spanish and romance languages in general. And
I would hang after class to pester my teachers who - this was in Wichita Falls, Texas. Like they're not - they're not Robert Langdon. Like they're just not. Robert Langdon was a college professor, also is not a real person. I would stay after class and pester my history teachers to like answer questions I had about religion or about the church or just about the world in general because I was 14. Like I was 15.
I know that they probably thought it was cute at first and then when I was like, okay, can you explain to me again how the Fibonacci sequence is in The Last Supper? How it correlates? They'd be like, what the fuck are you talking about? And I'd be like, yeah, you're right. Sorry. So the Fibonacci sequence, this is nerd shit, dude. I used to draw this in my journal. I used to like...
I wish Taylor was here because she would have so much to say. And I had kept a journal where in class when I would get bored or if I had like studied ahead, 'cause I was a scholar in high school. I was a scholar. It was my personality. I was a theater kid and I was a scholar, period. And I was funny, I guess, because the boys were not looking, okay? I was not pulling boyfriends. I was not pulling any romance. So you have to make up for it in other places. And I'm so fucking glad I did, but
But I was a weirdo, okay? I was, I was loser, loser. I had a journal that when I got bored in class, in this book, there is a secret code that one of the people
One of the people writes in this secret code and it's like a cipher. It's like little symbols and each symbol represents a letter. And it's based on this sort of tic-tac-toe looking thing. And the dots correlate to different letters and numbers. I used to write notes to Taylor in class in this fucking code. And I would pass it to her and I'd be like, secret. Like you have to decrypt it. She'd be like, what the fuck?
It's biology. I'm trying to take notes. We have a test tomorrow. And I'd be like, and I'd bring it back and I'd like decrypt it myself. And I'd be like, that's what I was trying to say. She'd be like, great. Awesome. Thanks. Just write it to me in English next time. It was my special interest. It was my secret passion, dude.
So I used to do that. And then also there's Da Vinci used to write left-handed and backwards. So people couldn't like enter only he could read his notes and understand what he was saying. So left-handed backwards and in cursive, he would take notes. And so people were like, what the fuck are these etchings? And it was just his notes. It was, it was whatever. And so I was like, I can do that. I would do that too. Oh, I was so fucking weird, dude. Then I,
The Fibonacci sequence. Let me go back to this. So this is the Fibonacci sequence. It's called the golden ratio. It's also known as the golden section, golden mean, or divine proportion in mathematics.
It is also represented by a Greek letter and this just has significance because this shape appears so much in nature in so many ways that you wouldn't expect. It also is the perfect mathematical, I mean, this sort of thing. It's like squares or something like that. I don't, hey, don't ask me, but I know its significance from The Last Supper. There's a correlation in The Last Supper with the Fibonacci sequence. Guys, do you give a fuck?
Hey guys, let's do a pulse check. Do y'all give a fuck? What actually am I talking about? By the way, just doing a little, little check-in with, with the team here. If you don't give a fuck, say aye. And if you just said aye, you're going to prison because this is the learning hour. This is the learning time and everyone needs to get up.
How is the golden ratio used in The Last Supper? It is believed that Leonardo da Vinci used the golden ratio in the proportions of the table, the placement of the figures, and the overall composition of the painting. Now what does this have to do with anything? You'll have to read the book and find out. Because it all comes together in a way at the end that's like, what the fuck? I was 15 like, oh my god, the da Vinci card. Oh my god. Oh my god, Dan Brown.
HermaGard DaVinci! Sometimes I am my number one fan and sometimes I think that I should have all my teeth ripped out and tongue cut out and just... You're done. You're absolutely done. I'm silencing myself. You're done. Report.
So anyway, I thought I was a political cryptographer as a 14 year old. That's really all that you need to know about me. This also kind of segues into this sort of academic mystery. If you're not really into the sort of religious aspect of academic mystery, like he is an academic through and through because he's a professor of art history and also iconography and symbols and things like that. But if you're not into that, if that's not your cup of tea,
A while back, if Broski Nation remembers, I read The Secret History and so many of y'all were like, "We love Donna Tartt, but it's kind of hard to get into Donna Tartt, who's the author, if you're not that kind of reader. Like if that thing doesn't really interest you." Which is, it's very big words.
And the plot is very interesting because the narrator is an unreliable narrator. And I think that's what makes the book so good. Because it adds this texture to the plot and to the narrative and to how things unravel that you slowly realize Richard, the narrator, cannot be trusted.
Like, he loses credibility a little bit. And it's interesting because it's like, oh my god, you're telling me this fucking story, bitch. I think that my thing with academic mystery is that I like to feel like I'm learning from fiction because I'm too impatient to read a nonfiction. And that may be problematic.
Because I did some, like, as a 14 year old, after I read Angels and Demons and Da Vinci Code, I was like, I wonder how much of this is actually true. And come to find out, these books are very heavily debated by both the art community, the religious community, the Catholic Church. Like everyone, this was a big, it made waves when this book came out, which I think was in like 2003, 2004.
And people had a lot to say about it because obviously academics are going to take a book like The Da Vinci Code and absolutely rip it to shreds because
It's written to entertain. It's an enthralling story with a cool main character, a little bit of romance, but mainly it's like action filled and it's shocking and it's got that religious undertone that kind of pulls you in the same way that I feel like "Exorcist" movies pull you in because it's got that religious undertone and it's framed in this way where only, this can only happen through
the church or someone affiliated with the church or a priest has to come in, you know, to an exorcist from the church has to come in and fix. It's just like, I think, I think it's morbid curiosity that's tied to a lot of this.
somehow having to deal with the church because it's so old and powerful and secretive. So much of religion is secretive. And I think that really struck a chord with me because I was actively growing up in the church. So I was reading this and I was like, damn, I've never thought about thinking of religion critically like this in a way like that wasn't really a concept I was familiar with. And it was easier to do that with a religion that was not mine. I am not a Catholic. I have never been a Catholic.
But I grew up knowing Catholics or, you know, kids whose parents were Catholic and hearing about some of the stuff they had to do, I was like, "That's fucking weird." And then some people who were not non-denominational Christian or Southern Baptist Christian were like, "That's fucking weird," when I would say what we would do. So it's like, you know, to each their own. But that really struck a chord with me as a child of like, "What is this flavor?" What is this flavor of novel, of pastime, if you will?
So yeah, this book was kind of torn apart by critics because it lacked evidential bases for a true compelling story. But I don't give a fuck, bitch. It was a fun read and it's my favorite book to this day. I love Angels and Demons. It's a great book. Or, well, I think Secret History might be my favorite book ever. Recently, it took over. I read Secret History late last year and it changed my life, dude. Like, I just...
Enjoy the secret history so much. The character building is so incredible. Donna Tartt is a wizard with her words. And with building a compelling... I mean, she tells you what happens on the first page. It's a murder mystery. And someone dies on the first page, period. And the rest of the book tells the story of how it happened and how these characters just unravel and why it happened. And it's fucked, bitch. It's fucked.
and it's tea and they're all sucking and fucking each other but it's not in a way that's like ooh, quarter thorns and roses. It's like ugh, it's like kind of gross. Anyway, Secret History is about a small group of friends, academics who are accepted into this small inner circle of students who study Greek and not only the Greek language but Greek, right? Isn't a Greek epic Greek epic? I am so smart. The Greek epic may have been strongly influenced
by these Asian traditions. Gee, we're all connected as humans. Eastern influences. The Greek world in the late Bronze Age was related to the Middle East by so many close ties that it formed an integral part of the Levant. What is that? I'm bored. Anyway, they study Greek epics and like famous Greek tales and you know whatever and one of the characters gets inspired by
an old tale or an old myth and tries to do it himself and the rest of the book you'll have to read because it's so good. I had to read it. I like shit like that though. You know, like I had to read it and I had my dictionary app open. Like I love that. I like to learn and
Not to bring it back to the Barbie movie, but I will bring it back to the Barbie movie really quick because that's how my brain works. That's how my brain works. Hi. Hello. Have you all seen that Melania Trump clip? Is there something you have learned about your dad in the course of this campaign that you didn't? Hello.
Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? That's how I feel. That's how I feel when I lose my train of thought. It's just her face like this.
Hello? Just echoing. Or I feel like that clip of Patrick on the seahorse, this, that's what's in my brain. In my brain rattling around is this clip and hello? Hello? Hello? You know, Patrick riding a seahorse for 10 hours HD. What are the comments on this video?
Patrick being aware that he's in a dream and can do whatever he wants yet chooses to vibe on the seahorse ride is the height of the Sigma mindset. This is the only thing that's keeping me alive right now is one of the comments.
I just adore the simplicity. It's a perfect example of how game developers overhype graphics when 8-bit games are just as much fun as they ever have been. But do 8-bit games have Ghost and Koenig from Call of Duty? No, they don't. Okay, next I want to... Okay, wait. I'm not done. Okay, I think I actually am. I'm done talking about the Secret History. You have to read it. Read Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. Read The Da Vinci Code. If you're into that sort of stuff. If you're into like...
fairy smut, read Court of Thorns and Roses. Okay? I really don't have any more recommendations. But I will hand the mic over to y'all for any recommendations you have for me about academic mystery. I love a good academic mystery. I went through a brief dark academia phase where Babel was recommended to me and I bought it and it's on my shelf. Haven't gotten around to it.
Song of Achilles was also recommended to me. That is also on my shelf. And I read Ninth House, but I did not like it. I think Ninth House is a Sarah J Maas book, isn't it? Ninth House author? No, Leigh Bardugo. But Leigh Bardugo wrote that Six of Crows one, right? Which was the Shadow and Bone. Yeah, Shadow and Bone, that TV show was so good.
But I haven't read the books. Anyway, Ninth House did not impress me. You can read it and, I don't know, tell me what you thought. But if you have any recommendations for me about academic mystery, definitely drop them in the comments. I will be reading them. This episode of The Brocery Report is sponsored by Next to completely switch gears, we have to talk about DJ Khaled. We have to talk about DJ Khaled. God dang. I call her chandelier.
The way y'all comment on my shit of like, "She makes me so comfortable being myself." That's how I feel about DJ Khaled. I watch DJ Khaled and I'm like, "You could be anything." You could be anything. I call her chandelier. - That's just avocado salad. - Is this called what? - Tricky salad. - Have you ever played rugby? - Life is roadblocks. - Let's go golfing. - Let's go golfing. I told him bring out the whole ocean.
Bring out the cappuccino! This is-- okay, add this to the roster of what's going on in my brain at all times. Hello? Melania Trump, Patrick riding the seahorse, and DJ Khaled. I told him bring out the whole ocean! A collar chandelier! Call me asparagus! Call me asparagus! Call me asparagus! He is so funny!
I wish I could be half as funny as fucking DJ Khaled not even trying. Let's go to the beach. Let's go swimming. Let's go golfing. Tell them to bring the auto. Roses are red. Bywands are blue. Ladies, I'm taking. Follow me. Like what? That was so funny. Tell them to bring out the lobster. Tell them to bring out the lobster.
Tell him to bring out the lobster! Alright, look at these babies. He's so... Tell him to bring out the lobster! What do you call this? That's avocado toast. What do you call this? That's sausage. Tell him to bring out the lobster! We have got to get DJ Khaled on royal court. Holy shit! We have got to get DJ Khaled on royal court!
I told him bring out the lobster! Let's go golfing! Why is he this way? Why does he- I have got to get him on royal court, dude. We have to review some of the best DJ Khaled dancing memes. When it's 4am and your dad is brushing his teeth and you hear this banger come on. The first, oh, me at McDonald's but this banger comes on.
When my mom is about to take a left and this banger comes on. I have got to sit down and have a conversation with DJ Khaled. Like just to have one moment with DJ Khaled. A real moment. I want a moment on with DJ Khaled. We have got to get him on Royal Court. I am not joking, dude. Do you think he'd do it? He did hot ones. He did hot ones. A moment of...
God, there is not a better song than that. ♪ I have a kiss, a cry ♪ What are the lyrics? ♪ I have a dream, a loud ♪ You know what also is a great song that I always get confused with this one is ♪ And it's a bittersweet symphony ♪ ♪ There's life ♪ Damn! Oh my God, I was hanging out with Madison Beer the other day.
'Cause she's my soul sister. I fucking love, we're the same person and it freaks me out. And we look like twins too. Stop, you can say, no, you can say it. It's fine. I was hanging out with Madison and we were talking about Fun, the band. Fun, he doesn't have any allegations or anything, does he? You never fucking know these days.
Fun the band lead singer. I had the fattest crush on him. Nate Roos. Nate Roos. Allegations. What happened? We Are Young did not age well? What happened? However, there's something that has always made me feel deeply uncomfortable about how the song
makes me feel. I simultaneously feel myself being pulled in by its convicted, urgent optimism while also acknowledging the story that drives the song isn't one that deserves this idealism. Okay, fucking Shakespeare, relax. It's a song.
Just look at the lyrics. While the song is admittedly inspired by a moment in Nate Roos' life that he isn't proud of, hence the "let's do better as a generation" vibe, it couches that humanizing self-criticism within the story of a person who seems to be just straight up physically abusive? Which is not at all what Nate's inspiration for the song was. What are you talking about?
The song begins with the line "Give me a second eye, I need to get my story straight." It's unclear whether this phrase is directed at- Okay, so no, he didn't do anything. She's just like doing a full in-depth analysis of the fucking lyrics. Whatever. Fun band. Oh dude, some nights I stay in my bed like some nights I- Holy shit. I'm about to reenter my fun era. What was that album called? Aim... Aim? Aim and Ignite. Holy shit.
This album is so fucking good. What do you bitches know about Spun? What do you bitches know about Some Nights and Aim and Ignite? Here we go. And here's the harmony. And here's the beatbox. I could beat Pentatonix like you're done. Pentatonix, move out of the fucking way. I can do it.
It's called a one woman show. It's called Yes, Women Can. It's called I'm Barbie. I can be anything. And guess what? I am. This Barbie is Pentatonix. This Barbie is a soprano, alto, tenor, and beatboxer all at the same time.
Okay? Did y'all ever used to do those apps in middle school or high school that was like the acapella app where you would make your own song or you would sing a cover and do and you would record all of them individually and you could only do like one or two or three and then the free version was over and you had to pay for it? I was always so impressed by the people that could do that. I wanted to do that so bad. I wanted to be...
I was a choir kid. Of course, I was a choir kid because I was a theater kid. But I wanted to be like pentatonics level so bad. And no one would do it with me. Like my friends were like, that's not cool. And I was like, whatever. And also acapella kids are not cool traditionally in high school. Like if you do acapella successfully and beautifully arranged outside of school, it slays. And people live for it because acapella is impressive. But if you're just like,
Trying to pitch perfect yourself in high school, babe. It's not gonna happen. Who's her? But that was me. I wanted to be the group so bad tonight Oh my god Carry on carry on carry on I have to go to karaoke right now
I'm actually going to wrap up this episode in like five minutes and go to my room and sing Carry On by Fun Karaoke in my room. Oh my God, this album was so good. Were y'all into... First of all, Fleet Foxes. I love Fleet Foxes in high school. I was such a Fleet Foxes girl because that was simultaneously I discovered Fleet Foxes and the Avett Brothers and the Teske Brothers in high school when I was having my Bluegrass revival.
Where the Oh Brother Where Art Thou soundtrack was like the number one most played album ever for me. I was really into Dolly, like newer Dolly, like Blue Smoke era Dolly. There was a lot of just bluegrass gospel songs. And I was having that and then I discovered Fleet Foxes as well, which is like...
a beautiful blend of old bluegrass with modern indie. And in through all that, I also listened to this band Half Moon Run, which was so good. I loved Half Moon Run. And that like every time I hear one of those songs or a Young the Giant song, it takes me cough syrup. I'm the giant fuck off bitch.
Those, that era of music to me is so nostalgic because yes, I listened to Arc de Monkeys, Lana Del Rey, whatever, but that was kind of the other side of it where I was having this sort of indie folk moment, which I guess a lot of people were, but like Abbott Brothers, get into it, bitch. Bluegrass and folk.
country, folk country is coming back. Tyler Childers, Colter Wall, like there's Zach Bryan even, like there are a lot of people who are bringing this lost art form back. And so much of country music before, honestly, 9/11 was anti-establishment and like Johnny Cash was so anti-fucking government and anti-like it was such a progressive.
And after 9/11, country music, there was like a big shift for some reason. And I mean, I understand the reason, like patriotism, of course. But it just went too far almost where it's like every fucking song now in country music is about red, white and blue and fucking your truck. And I don't do that in a small town. So serious for a second. Can we be so serious?
That's the type of music that appeals to like it's not thoughtful in its art form it is a quickly pumped out like pump and dump
"country pop radio banger," banger I say in quotes, that they pump out of just like, "I love my truck, dirt roads, dirt on my boots, duh duh duh, whatever." And they're catchy songs like John Party songs are catchy, whatever. But I'm not listening to that and I'm like, "Damn, I love country music." You know, it's so meant for the masses that I find it hard to relate to that type of music.
even though it has the label "country music." Country music to me is like old Alan Jackson or like Randy Travis or even, you know, the 90s country of George Strait, Garth Brooks, all that. Like, I like it, but I really tend to lean more bluegrass when I listen to "country music," quote unquote. And it's crazy the difference in lyricism.
So I could write a whole dissertation on that, on how country music was forever changed by the events of the early 2000s in America. So I think that'll just about do it for me, team, because I need to go to my room, gotta get back on my iPhone, read some more Ghost from Call of Duty fan fiction, and gotta go sing karaoke, okay? Now it is 1 47 a.m. And I don't give a fuck. And also maybe my camera broke, but now I'm stressed out.
But it's fine because guess what? It's an audio podcast and we adapt and overcome team. I love you guys. Thank you for listening. Please go subscribe to the YouTube channel. Brady Broski. Go watch Royal Court, my show. When we have DJ Khaled on the show. We're working on it, team. I've got to get DJ Khaled on Royal Court. Like my life depends on it. Then go follow me on Instagram. Follow me on TikTok. That's how it feels.
But for real, give it a like and a follow and a five-star rating. Love you guys so much.
