Night of the Crooked Moon | A Folk Horror One Shot
02:58:44 Share

Welcome to Legends of Avantris. Hungry woods, reaching, snatch the light out from the sky. Leafy sighs, creaking bone, pray you don't get found alone. Crickly crack the branches, pop their crawls, the night that never stops. The tree that leans with twisted grins, her limbs are thrown, her soul is sin. Underneath the crooked moon, stalks the king of crime.

In pale decay and empty gloom He comes for you Six horns his crown His kingdom all For life delicious heat his core He carries six Of sword and steel One sway with souls that fall and kneel

Run, run, don't shrink and cower, join us at the witching hour. Stoop and sing in thrashing light to smother the shrieks of endless night. Dance beneath the crooked moon, and rising rapture hand in hand. An empty room will comfort you, may our light embrace you too.

The funny thing about narrators is that they're fully unreliable. We may like to wax eloquent about our favorite fables and folk tales in the waning hours of the day,

But they're all lovely little lies bathed in the pearly white shimmer of wistful reminiscence. The fact of the matter is that for every yawn you think you know by heart, there's a whole other side to that story so dark that it only lingers as the stuff of nightmares in the shrouded fringes of lunacy and imagination most twisted. Now you might catch yourself asking, "Then how did it really happen?" Lucky for you, this story ain't over.

So the long-forgotten truth may reveal itself yet. You may even discover that the answer to that question is entirely up to you. Or maybe, just maybe, your wants and wishes are nothing but a whistle in the wind. All you need now is a little patience. Darkness surrounds you. Your minds drift in and out of dreams both tantalizing and terrifying.

for a time that feels simultaneously like an instant and an eternity. A sudden jolt stirs you from the slumber you cannot recall, and as you return to the realm of the waking, you realize that there's much that you cannot remember. Your senses return and you realize that you're seated in a passenger car of some sort of train, rocking and swaying as it thunders forward to an unknown destination.

You get your bearings and see that most of the seats are occupied by silent spirits, shimmering in a ghastly blue-green and only having the most vague humanoid shape. But then you realize, you are not alone. Thankfully, your five companions, your five only friends in the darkness you rocket through, are scattered around the car, waking from restless sleep just like you.

How you met these people and where you all came from, you have no idea. But what you do know is that there is a deep feeling of dread within the core of your being, punctuated by the lonesome wailing whistle of the distant locomotive that pulls you deeper into the gloom. The candlelight flickers in this train car, and as you look about and you take in the image of your friends around you all waking up from that dreamless sleep, try and get your bearings.

How did you get here? What were you doing before this moment? Who are these strange humanoid figures that sit in this car with you? And as you look out of this car and into the others in this section of the train, they sit in almost complete stillness. Humanoid shapes, very clearly, but all in that ghastly greenish blue and none of them talking or moving or interacting in any way.

Just the six of you. Gosh, I'd never get used to sleeping. I could never, never understand why someone wouldn't have a biological need to do such a thing. Having a biology at all is... just sounds like the worst. Were we really sleeping? There were no dreams. Something about this is so very familiar, but I cannot remember. Does anyone remember what we were doing just moments ago before...

Our slumber? I have no recollection of how we got here, but something about this train makes me feel uneasy. Did we get drugged again? I... I do not think so, no. Why do I feel like that happens a lot lately? Something about this time is different. I mean, I don't even know why we're here or what we're doing. Well, let's retrace our steps.

We seem to be on some sort of locomotive vehicular device, which means that we became fancy rich city folk in the interim of our slumber. And you look, you all look out the window as a mist drifts past the window. You stare out of it for a while, but you see no buildings. You see no other trains. You see no trees. All you see is

a mist almost like a shroud as it just rushes past the train. I can't say where we're going. Something about this is just so familiar, but I cannot put my finger on it. This doesn't feel like a train that rich people would ride. Well, look at these other passengers. Nobody's responding. Nobody seems alert. Well, have you ever seen...

someone who is not rich city folk ever ride on a train? Or ever before? No, correct. I've never ridden on a train before, so I just assumed that it wouldn't look like this. Is this what rich folk train look like? Well, I

I guess I've never seen him either. I just assumed. Looking around the train, it does look like this kind of train that rich folk would ride. The seats are plush. The wood is carved. There is fanciful gilding. Even the lanterns that illuminate this place are intricate and beautiful, at least in this train car.

And whether it's for the truly wealthy or at least the well-off, this train is a beautiful piece of creation. - Yorgren, my friend, are you able to communicate with these spirits? - Well, let me try. Hello, you there.

Spirit, I'm riding on the... Um, Jorgren, I'm going to be honest with you. I thought you were going to have some sort of a ritual, perhaps some sort of special spectral...

- I don't know. - I mean, they're just sitting right there. - No, man, I don't have to summon them, I don't think. They're sitting in the seats. - Jorgrem. - Looks like they have tickets and everything. - What about the lantern? Doesn't it have some connection to the other world? - Jorgrem, as you speak to one of these entities, it turns its head and looks towards you. It doesn't look at you. It looks through you and out the window into the shrouded fog that rushes past. - I don't think it can even see you.

Feels like it's looking through me. It's not responding. I don't get... Do I get the sound? I mean, it's obviously a spirit. It just doesn't register me. Do I get any kind of... It doesn't seem to pay any attention to you at all as you attempt to speak to it. Is anyone else getting the heebie-jeebies? Well, that wasn't until you mentioned it.

But now you got a feeling it, right? How could someone ignore such a charismatic hello? How do you do? Dripping with charisma. Normally, all I have to say is hello, spirits. Speak to me, and then they respond, but they just stare right through me. There's something unright about this place. Perhaps we aren't on the same plane as they are. Perhaps there's some...

Barrier or disconnect? This is a train, Mary. It's not a plane. Just so we're on the same page. I want to make sure you understand the difference. Planes are places of existence. But we're on the same train. So I feel like train is sort of lower down in the funnel of existence, right? I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but that's sort of how I was thinking about it.

It's at this moment that every single one of these heads, or one of the heads of these entities, all turns and looks into your train car. But not at you, through you. And out into the fog that rushes past. - Who? - What are they looking at? - Something must be out there. - Do you see anything? - And I'll look out where they're looking. - You look out and you see no silhouettes, no movement, nothing at first.

But then as you continue to stare into the fog, you begin to see what appears to be the outline of faces. And as you press yourself up against the glass to try and get a better look, you see that interspersed in this dense fog are hundreds of wailing faces rushing past.

God, I was waiting for you to jump scare me so bad. Just keep running. It's coming, it's coming. The night is young. Well, oh, Farron, what are you seeing? I have, on account of not having eyes, I can't really see. Can you look real close against that window?

- Surely nothing will jump at you. - Fair and good, gills and gills. - Yes, make sure you press your face directly up against the glass. - Oh, your antlers might get in the way. Oh, your tombstone might get in the way. Oh, you have a mask. Oh, you have a snap, Marius.

- All right, Jericho, I'll handle it. And Marius will walk up, try not to disturb the other passengers, try to find an aisle where Marius can put his face directly up against the window and try to get a better look. - You squeeze between the legs of your friends as you're in a compartment and it's two seats, one on either side,

though you're all crowded in here, there are a couple of these humanoid figures in this compartment with you. You make your way between the seats and press your face up against the glass. And it feels cold to the touch as your fingers... Oh, even to me? Even to you. As your fingers press up against the glass,

you see little bits of frost appear on the window outside as if the temperature outside is significantly colder than the temperature on the inside of this compartment. And you stare out and you do see what Farron is talking about, these ghostly faces wailing in the darkness and they float past. - Do you see them, Marius? - Yes, we are very clearly in some sort of realm of death.

I've seen faces like that before and they weren't happy. They weren't... They weren't alone. They weren't around for very long. I'm listening to all of this and I'm going to start checking my person for a ticket to see if I can find an item or any additional evidence or clues that might be on my person and also to see if I still have the things that I remember having on me the last time I had a memory.

What was the last memory you had about the things that you had on you? I would have my mask on. I would have a bag that I cannot remove. I would have a chakram at my side, a weapon. I would have perhaps a small purse. You remember maybe having a pouch, but nothing about a bag on your side you couldn't remove. Your mask is firmly in place, but you might have had a satchel or some kind of...

small backpack or something of the like where you would keep your things. Maybe some religious effigies, incense, a couple of candles, some trinkets here and there. But aside from that, you think and you feel like there are things that you should remember, but wherever those memories reside, they're shrouded. And you feel yourself and all the things that you should have are there.

There is nothing additional. There are no tickets. There's no itinerary. There's no letter or note explaining why you would be here. Hmm. I'm just going to continue to listen as I think about the relationship I have with memory. Marius, if it's like you say and this train is taking us through the lands of death, our destination can't be anywhere that's good for us. We should get to whatever pilots this creation and see where we're going. You're right.

I thank Lathander. At the very least, we are together. I know I can rely on all of you, and we will be all right. I'd be mighty afeard if I was trapped alone with all these spooky ghosts. They're also quite rude. But I'm so glad I have friends. For the first-- well, not the first time ever. I'm not needy or nothing. But I'll just stick close to you. And I won't leave if you tell me to. I will, I mean. Never mind.

Is there some kind of uniform that they wear? I only saw it in pictures. He sounds like an usher, you know.

I mean, I guess if, you know, I'm sure somebody's driving this thing, you know, presumably it's not like a ship. Do I, I guess I wouldn't see the rails that we're on, right? Like I wouldn't,

Looking outside, all you see is the shroud of fog and the wailing faces. Do we get a sense of forward momentum? It does feel like you're propelling forward.

- So we can kind of presume which direction we're headed in. Like not like north, but like, oh, it's this way or it's this way, right? Like we can feel the G forces on our body. - Yes, you can feel the force on your body. You can feel the train shaking. You imagine that there must be some sort of track that you're on because you can feel the wheels as they move across some sort of track and it shakes the train and knocks things this way and that. You can hear the clink of the glass as it shakes.

Well, let's see if we can get to the front of the train. And let us all try to stay in the same car at the same time. We should not be separated. I hate to say this, but this is a train, not a car. Just someone on the same page. First planes and trains and automobiles? This is ridiculous. I just wanted to make sure, I mean, there are a lot of crazy people. This feels like we're just speaking different languages. Anyway, either way, I'm going to follow.

I'll walk towards the connector of the car and try the presumably door handle. I'll be right next to Farron. You all make your way out of the train car, the cabin that you're in, and into the long hallway that runs the length of this train car. And you look this way and that until, just feeling the momentum of the train, you get a good idea of which way you would imagine the engine of this train would be.

And you head in that direction, taking a quick right and heading towards what you believe to be the front of the train. You get to the door, Farron, and there is a handle there for you to turn and enter the new carriage, but you notice that all you see is darkness in front of you. The window that's on this door, it clearly leads to somewhere, but

You can't see what could be beyond this door. And yet, you continue forward. - I think the lights have gone out. - And as you open the door, soon as you open the door to the next car, your senses are overwhelmed with garish light, gaudy color, pungent fragrance, and brassy jazz music that is far too loud and far too upbeat for a ghost train.

In that moment of shock, you realize you're standing firmly within the next car and the door has slammed behind you. - Ugh. - Before you seems to be a luxurious dining car with plush upholstery, pristinely pressed tablecloths, and even ornate pieces of art fastened to portions of the wall in between the windows to the gloom beyond. There's an unnaturally long bar along the left side of the car with every kind of alcohol you could possibly imagine, and many you never knew to exist.

Sitting at this bar is the space's lone passenger, a tall, thin human man with slicked-back black hair and a pencil-thin mustache. He is dressed in an almost too-fine gray suit with pinstripes, and on the bar is a polished cane with a silver goat skull as its topper. Once he notices you, he turns from his glass of amber spirits and gestures widely to you. You're finally awake? I thought you were going to snooze the whole trip.

Maybe even join your fellow passengers back there in death so you can get reborn for a second chance at life in a brand new fetching and functional form. Seems you want to keep your dusty old bodies. Your loss. I'm just yanking your chain. Come over here, sleepyheads, and perk up with a cocktail. It's what I do to get ready first thing every early dusk. I'll elbow your Grimm and I'll say, See, look what I said about rich folk. They ride on trains.

This is more how I imagined it. With the music and the guy and... Is that bacon? Did he just imply that we were dead? Yes, that's what I seem to take from it. That's correct. That seems like the most likely explanation for what has happened to us given the state of our minds and the other spirits in this place. Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but that would certainly be a first for me.

Given what we all know. Yes. Well, so sorry for being rude. We're just surprised to just be on a ghost train and be with a bunch of spooky ghosts and seeing a non-ghost in such a fine looking compartment such as this with such fine bottles. Anyway, how do you do? My name is Jericho Stiggs, but you can call me Jericho. Most folk do. I stumble forward. I try to take off my hat. I'm very nervous. If a scarecrow could sweat...

- I would be, being around someone I perceive to be very rich. - Jericho is right. We apologize for our rudeness. My name is Sir Marius Renathia. Pleasure to meet you. - He reaches out his hand and he shakes it. It's a pleasure to meet you too. It's good to see that you're all alive and well. - I'd introduce myself, but it seems you know us already. - He looks at you a bit and he, no, I don't think I've ever seen you a day in my life.

But at least you're alive, at least you're awake, unlike the rest of these folks up on this train. Now, it's just curious what folks like you are doing on a train like this. Do you have any answers for us? Oh, he looks at you and he reaches out towards your mask. You do look a bit familiar. Have we met before? Do I feel familiarity with you?

- The first roll of the cricket. - I'll do insight just, I think that will work. - It rolled a three earlier. Let's see how that goes. Insight, insight. I think I will accept one of your 25s please.

- Wow. - You look at him and for a moment you feel a sense of familiarity, but it is fleeting. As you take in the lines of his face, he is a very handsome man. And it's possible that you could have seen a man that looks similar to this in your many years of travel. Though that feeling of familiarity stays in your stomach

You can recollect no memories with this particular person. And as his hand lingers by your mask, hmm, it's quite interesting. Quite interesting. Yes, it is. Tell me, what is the last thing that you remember? Have you always been a bartender here in this train car? Oh, yes.

Oh, little lady, I'm not a bartender at all. I'm frequenting this train because I'm traveling. He's not behind the bar. No, he's in front of the bar drinking. My apologies. Oh. Now, if you'd like a drink, I'd love to share a drink with all of you. One of our finest whiskeys, some scotch, rye. I'll have some, please. Make it two. I'll take one as well. Pick your poison.

Fine whiskey sounds lovely, please. Whiskey, whiskey, whiskey? Whiskey, whiskey, whiskey? Sarsaparilla, is that whiskey? Can be today. Just a tall, cool bottle of sarsaparilla would just do me right fine. He snaps his fingers, and you watch as some of the bottles begin to shake, and they begin to rise up off of the counter, or off of the shelf, and you watch as...

glasses rise up from behind the bar and one in front of each of you is laid down as these bottles float forward and begin to pour. All the while, you see he's moving his hand as he's controlling this one and this one and this one, pouring that one, adding a slice of a lime or...

some salt to the rim or whatever touch to the alcohol of your dreams or in Jericho's case, a sarsaparilla, nice cool sarsaparilla on the rocks. - I turn down the whiskey and ask for a mixed drink, the last word.

and he smiles at you and gets to work on this drink, seemingly understanding what your requests are without having to ask for instructions. And it takes no time at all for you all to be sitting here at the bar with this new person, all enjoying a drink. Well, it's been very rude of me to

provide you with drinks and not tell you anything about myself. I'm Philip Drostenwald, and you, my friends, are making your way to my lands. Oh, so you're saying that you're a landowner, huh? I see that glint in your eye. You're a businessman at heart, aren't you? I've been called that by a crocodile or two.

Oh, and a scarecrow, for extra measure. He's quite shrewd, I believe is the term. There's something wrong with your eye. Oh, do you mean this filthy sack that's got holes poked into it? Leading to strange orangey soul stuff? On perhaps a fiendish construction on account of the old crow demon? Wait, Virgil! Virgil!

- Am I really free of Virgil? - You are not. - Oh wait! Oh, I'm free of! And my head will snap back up and you'll just hear, "Never!" And suddenly my mouth will open and there's a burst of black feathers as a horrible, demonic looking crow just shoots out and flaps and starts pecking me on the head.

- I wasn't being wishful thinking, Virgil. Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. We're best chums, like you always said. You're the only friend I'll ever have and no one else will ever love me like you. Ah, okay, okay, it's okay, Virgil. Oh, I got feathers all in my sarsaparilla. Oh, and now I've brought down the moon. Do you allow animals on the train? I could just take care of it and I'll pull out my flip-knock. - I don't think you could take care of it if you tried. Are you looking at that thing?

No, no, not your friend Jericho. The thing on his shoulder. Oh, I mean, it looks kind of spooky, but I've shot birds, crows, seagulls, albatrosses. Albatry? What's the plural? I believe albatry. Albatry. Now that I look at you all a little bit closer, you've been here before, haven't you? Well, we certainly get the feeling that we do, but we just can't quite put our fingers on it. But I feel like that's a completely different story than the one we're in right now.

Now, that's a different Talon, though some things seem to be familiar. What? Hmm. Well, it doesn't matter all that much, but I can tell at least one thing. You haven't been to Wickmore Hollow. No, it doesn't ring a bell. Is that where we're headed? Well, the train's passing through there, that's for sure. Wickmore Hollow's been having troubles. People going missing, crops failing, beasts that stalk the woods, that sort of thing. And you look like you've, uh,

Gotten your hands dirty a fair share of times. Wait, are you saying there's trouble? Trouble right here in Wendell Hallow? It's literally what I just said.

- The trouble starts with tea in it. Anyway, I thought just with your voice, you'd go break into some kind of song if I just peed you up, nevermind. - I do like to sing on occasion, but I haven't had enough scotch for me to be doing performance for you this evening. - Do all rich folks sing and dance? With tap and shoes? - In the major illusions they do. - You can't be married to my wife and not know how to dance. - Oh.

- You got a wife? - Of course I've got a wife. And he lifts up his hand that he's been holding his scotch and you see that there's a large golden wedding band there on his finger. - Lucky.

We're heading into the realms of death with beasts that haunt the woods and you're worried about the fact that he's married? Well, I mean, the horrible woods of death would sure be a lot warmer with the best gal. Well, I suppose that's true. Thank you. Maybe she has a sister for you. Ooh, does she have a sister for me? I hate to break it to you, but no. There's only, my sweet Adela is one of a kind.

Well, that's congratulations on your new betrothal. He looks at you, seems a little bit confused, but he waves it along. Yes, we're heading towards Wickermore Hollow, and I think that you could do a little bit of good there. Maybe, maybe not. Is this Wickermore Hollow also filled with spirits and mists like this? Oh, the entire place of Druskinvald is filled with spirits and mist. Hmm.

Well, perhaps we'll have some more spirits before we have to deal with those spirits. Sounds like a great idea to me. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. That's a party plan, Briggsie. You're out. I'm still close to mine. I got a cruise ship start. Yeah.

He snaps and immediately refills your drink. Well, cheers to new friends and potentially the saviors of Wickmore Hollow. And a brief moment of respite. I've got things that I have to do and shopping to take my wife to, so hopefully you can mend it so I don't have to think twice about it. Oh, all right then. I suppose we'll drink to that. All right. Cheers. Should we say some words? A toast? Oh, go on. Uh...

Oh! Uh... We're going on the rails on a spooky train.

That's all I have. I didn't expect you to be on the spot. I put myself on the spot. I'll teach you, then! Cheers! Cheers! You've got a great voice on you, Jericho. Oh, well, thank you very kindly. I think my wife would love to hear you sing. Speaking of my wife, she is the most beautiful, smart, mystical, intelligent, amazing, hottest woman you could possibly imagine. And she's in the one car over. Huh?

She's not for your good, sir. She's for me. She's been in there aligning her energy all night. And you know what I think? I think she'd like to meet you. And if, I'm going to need you to calm down. I need you to wait and bring it in. The yogurt is also cursed.

You wanted some yogurt? No, I'm fine with my last word. Thank you. No problem. Anything for you. Now, you see, Adela's a mystical woman. And if you're going to be heading into Wickham War Hollow, she might be able to help you out a bit. See if she can commune with the spirits in the world around her or something. Give you some help along the way. That sounds good. I think we could use that. Is she some sort of cleric or wizard or something? She's Adela. What more is there to say?

Fair enough. I don't know. Is she, like, clearing her energy? Or is she, like, clearing her energy? You know what I mean? No, I don't know what you mean. I don't know what you mean either. I guess we'll find out in about three seconds. Wait, can she tell us our future? One of the greatest things about Adela, and let me tell you, there are many great things about Adela, is she has the sight beyond sight. That sounds useful. Perhaps we can get some clarity on why we're here, what happened before.

Well, if you're interested in meeting her, I'll let her know you're here.

That would be lovely, yes, please. - Please. - You watch as he picks up, as he lifts his hand, the same one that he had been using to hold his glass of liquor, and you see a cuff link on his wrist, shaped like, in similar fashion to the goat skull on the head of his cane, and he puts it up towards his mouth. Adela, sweetie?

There are some people in the bar car, if you're interested in meeting them. I think they could use some of your mysticism and just some of your boundless energy. Love you, sweet pea. See you soon. I'm sure she'll be here in a minute. Your wife is a ring? We have a way of communicating with each other across many planes. It's a magical item, friend. I'm sure you've got some of your own, like your little crow fella there. Well...

That's one way to describe Virgil. He's my worst friend. I mean, he's my very best friend. I'm getting pecked violently. I'm not sure how long it's going to take her for her to clear her energy. So until then, just enjoy the spirits. And if you have any questions, feel free to throw them my way. I'm sorry. I feel like we need to start over. It just got off to an awkward start.

You pining after my wife? No, I'm not pining. I'm just jealous of what you have. Not...

Not with her particularly. I just never had a best gal of my own. What about these two beautiful gals standing next to you? Oh, no, no, no. I'm like covered in mud and kind of smell. Sacky moss. Something's crawling around in my hair. We're all just best companions. None of us are best anything besides best friends. Well, anyways, where are these ghosts coming from and where are they going?

Well, all of these ghosts, as you call them, spirits, they are on their way to Druskinbald where they'll be reborn into their new forms. I apologize. Some of them even look like you, scarecrows. Garsh, scarecrows? You've got skeletons, imps, rat folk, beetle folk, harpies, lichens, ghouls. You have zombies? We don't have any zombies. Oh. I apologize if you've mentioned this already, but do you own this train?

Nobody owns this train. Nobody that I know. You mentioned that we were heading to your lands. Do you own this Wickermore Hollow? I own all of Druskinvold. It's in the name. Bill of Druskinvold, at your service. Oh.

Who is it? Oh my God, look at 'em, there's so many of 'em in here. Look at you, you got bark all over you and moss and all kinds of things. This is wild, Phillip, look at 'em, they're darling, honey. You see, bouncing into this train car from one train over is a petite woman with a pair of shoes

beautiful brown hair that is short and almost plastered to her head and these cute little finger curls. She has a long necklace down the front of her form-fitting outfit that is covered in beads that sways with the movement of her hips. The necklace is long and at the very end you see that it has some sort of what almost looks like the planchette on a spirit board.

but is clearly a detailed and elaborate piece of jewelry. And you see that she picks it up and she holds it to her eye and she looks at each of you and lets out a cute little gasp as she inspects each of you individually. She bounces up to you, the beads swaying with every bit of movement as she unabashedly pulls

walks up to you and shakes your hand and plays with a little bit of your moss and pokes at your stomach, Jericho. Each of you, it is very clear she has no shame and no sense of personal space.

as she bounds around and you glance to Philip who is staring at her with all of the love in the world. It is as if everything that is important is bundled into this one tiny package of a woman as she just bounces here and there and diggles and squeals before she finally jumps onto the stool next to Philip, spins around on it three times, kicking her feet up in the air before she crosses one leg over the other. This is gonna be

This is gonna be so great getting to know you. I'm Adela Druskin-Vault, I'm Philip's wife. - It is a pleasure. - Yes, second time. - Oh, absolutely, there has not been anyone alive on this train, and well, except for us, right, Philip? And she elbows him in the side, and he looks down at her and puts one hand on her shoulder. Anything you say, honey, anything you say. And he drops a soft kiss on her forehead before continuing to let her speak. - Wait, so.

You say we are still alive? Well, I guess from a certain point of view. Well, I sure hope so. You're not looking like one of them chaps in one of the other train cars. You took the thought right out of my mouth. I mean, if you want to be dead, I guess you could try to be. What do you think you'd be reborn as in Druskin Bald? Well, you're already a scarecrow, so I guess you've got that one covered. Hmm, let me see if I could guess. Scarecrow? You would be a haunted tree folk for sure. You, I don't know, maybe like some kind of living toy?

Like a duel or something?

That would be interesting, don't you think? I could see that. Like a porcelain little baby doll. Yeah, I could see that. You. You're very large. Well, thank you. You would be a trollkin. Yeah. You would be a trollkin. You would probably be a ratfolk. I mean, sure, it's the closest thing I'm going to get to an alligator, so. You mean me or him? No, you. Oh, me. The one with the chunk. Oh. No, this one here.

Brooding, blonde, blue-eyed. Well, no, blue-eyed once, huh? Interesting. I think you'd be an imp. I can see that. Surprising no one. I assumed you were going to say also a toy, but I can see imp, yes. No, definitely an imp. Some of us are in a state of in-between, currently.

Oh, that's ominous. Yeah. So you'll be with us someday then? Like for real, for real? I almost hope so. It depends on the nature of our curse and how we were cursed and really the dark power that holds claim over our souls. It's very complicated.

We all walk in the mists eventually, Briggsie. There's no way to avoid it. Oh, wow. Wow, you're all so mysterious and interesting. Yogi, that was a badass thing to say. Oh, my God. I got chills. I don't know if I can still get those. Well, I mean, I guess most of the folk are in between. I'm kind of more of a never at all. So how are you feeling about going into Wickermore Hollow? We're hoping to find some answers.

It's so nice of you guys to offer to go ahead and do that so Phillip and I can go shopping. We were really tired of pretending to care about what was happening over there. I mean, we do care, you know, but...

Oh, you-- I need a new dress. We're gonna have a party soon. It's-- it's-- it is no-- it's no problem. It's one of the tenets. We always aid when we can. Well, I mean, is there some kind of reward or something? Or as Jericho would say, genuine reward. Oh, that's my line. No, no reward or anything, but isn't that why you're here?

- What else would six living folk be on this train heading into Druskinvold, passing directly through Wicker Moor Hollow when there were problems going on down there? - To be honest with you, we have no memory. The last thing-- - Oh, that's scary. You must be horrified about that. - The last thing that I can remember is having some sort of purpose or quest for my king. Beyond that, nothing. - Does anything ring true about when she says, well, that's why we're here?

- Roll an insight check. - It's time for another roll. - Oh, roll number two. - That's the provocation. - Hot damn. - It's above average. - That's right. - Oh, well, shucks. - We take those. - What was it? What did you say? I forget. - Insight. - Oh, no. - Oh, no. - That's a 15. - Good gods.

- Briggsie has no. - You're listening to the things that she's saying and you have no memory of why you're here, where you were before you fell asleep, what you had been doing weeks leading up to that. You know who you are, what's on your person, who these people are around you, but how you met them, you don't remember. The adventures you could have possibly gone on, you don't remember.

But what she's saying sounds logical. If you woke up on this train as the only living people in whatever this place may possibly be, and the only two other apparently living people are telling you that there was trouble here, you feel like that is at least a better guess than any you could come up with on your own. Well, fair enough.

Well, I mean, I'm sure you care very deeply about your subjects, on account of being your own land, but shopping... Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, it's a very important thing. A political leader needs to be looking stylish, or else how are they going to wield power reasonably at all? You think anyone's going to listen to you if you don't look absolutely adorable or dapper? It's just not going to happen.

Yeah, I mean, I look gross and downtrodden and no one listens to what I have to say. Oh, honey, don't. She walks over to you and she grabs one of your hands. Say that about yourself. You got a lot more value than you think. I'm listening to you right now. Oh, I'd be careful with that. Oh, does he give you splinters? He wears a handsome hat. You can call it that. Ew. What?

I split this one to college. What? I did not think that you went to college. Well, college. Anyway, honey, I'm just saying, don't put yourself down, all right? Oh, it's okay. The words will come to you when you're ready. She drops your hand very quickly and bounces back over towards the wall and sits down. So what, honey, are you scared?

It's not so bad. I actually have been through this experience once before, so I feel quite comfortable. We may not have the syntax of our former lives, but...

We are united and we can accomplish anything if we stick together. Lethika's right. We have purpose. There's good we can do here and that is enough. Oh, well that's great. I'm glad to hear it. Anytime I get nervous about stuff, I like to do a tarot card reading to kind of help myself get some guidance. I could do one for you, but I mean, if you're not scared at all and you think that you're going to be just fine, I guess what's the need, right?

I would be happy to take everything. Oh, you would? I would love that so much. We should go find a table. We'll sit down around it. I can turn the lights down a little bit. We'll make it a bit spooky. Because you've got to make sure that the ambiance is all set. You know what I mean? And then I'll start pulling the cards. I bet they'll be really good cards. I'm sure there won't be anything weird about them. Of course there wouldn't, because you're here for...

For a reason. You're just going into, oh, it's going to be great. You want to do that? You want to? I can show you a place to go. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Before we get started, is this some sort of hidden fee or something? You're going to try to, like, upcharge us, upsell us on something after you do the reading? Well, that's just rude. Look at me. Of course I don't need your money. I just wanted to do it for fun. Yeah, I mean, there's other kinds of currencies besides money.

Like what? Are you trying to offer me sexual favors in front of my husband? No, no, no. Philip, are you serious? That's what I was talking about. You see that Philip holds on to the goat skull on his cane, and for the first time, you see a flicker of anger across his face as he looks towards you. Oh, God. Are you trying to proposition my wife? No, no. The whole point is... My wife is trying to offer you a really...

A kind thing, I think. A tarot reading to see where your futures may lie in this place. Please excuse my friend. He did not mean to overstep. He does it often and he doesn't know what he is doing or how to think or act. I just wasn't implying weird sex stuff. Look, that's all I'm saying. I mean, it's not like I haven't done it.

I mean, like, say, oh, I can see the future. Look at all these tricks I can do. Are you implying that my wife is a liar? No. And she would try and pull a bruise over your eyes? As a fellow member of your cult, or whatever you call it here. I'm just worried about anyone else. Please, please just apologize to the couple. I'm sorry. You know what? I can admit when I'm wrong. I can admit.

And I can be the bigger crocodile zombie person. So I apologize. Please excuse my friend. Captain! Miss Philip Druskin. Miss... What was your name? Adela...

- Adeline, Adela, Adela? - She kind of tilts her head down and looks sad. - It's Adela Druskinvold. - You're so gracious, Captain. - Did you say you were? - I'm sorry, Adela. - Did you say you were sorry? - I did say I was sorry. - Oh good, I'm so glad you did. Philip, can I do the tarot reading for him? - If that's what you wanna do, honey, that's what you gotta do.

You know I'm gonna support anything you want. I know you are, honey. It's one of the things I love about you the most. And she gets up on her tippy toes and she goes to place a smooch on his cheek, but she's far too short. So he reaches down, puts his arms around her waist, picks her up so that she can kiss him on the cheek. He ruffles her hair a little bit. Oh, don't you mess up the do, honey. I'm about to do a tarot reading. He...

He squeezes her tightly a little bit as he places her down on the ground, and she motions towards you to follow her. There's a table right here in the corner. Let's go ahead and get set up. Grab your drinks. Come on. I can't think of a more appropriate place than Realm of the Dead for a reading. Miss Farron, I know you're probably very feared, so maybe we should ask Miss Adela for some reassurance that this will just confirm our heroic fate. Ha ha ha.

Are you asking me to ask on your behalf? No, I just, I see that you're a little nervous and a little feared. I mean, I'm not afeard. Right. But I can see, I just thought, you know, maybe we'd want to do it, you know. You know, now that you mention it, I am feeling a little bit afraid. Oh, I can tell, I know. For reassurance, I think maybe I'd, you know, I think we'd better ask her. Oh, that's good to do that for yourself. Thank you. Just for myself. Good, I'm looking out for you. Yeah, exactly right. What did I want to ask her again?

Then everything's going to be okay, and it's going to be confirmation of our heroic fate, and everything's going to be real fine in Wicker Moralo. I am feeling a bit afraid, you see, and... No, honey, don't be afraid. You're so beautiful. There's nothing to be afraid when you're beautiful. You're beautiful. No, I'm talking to you! What? I think what I really want to know is...

The glow in my eyes and mouth actually dulls. Does that make fashion? It'll pass. It's a very dim glow. It's like you have a third

than just a laugh. No, that's the problem. He needs a third one. Nah, it's been ripped out of me. If a crow can laugh, Virgil laughs, and he comes over to attempt to give you a high five to your horn. Got him! He takes his towel and he's doing this.

I think we just really want to know that everything's gonna be all right. That we are meant to be here and helping in the town. That's why I want to do the tarot reading for you, because it's gonna go ahead and tell you what to expect in your future. I'm sure everything will be fine. Look at you, you're all strong and healthy and alive. I mean, you've already got so many things going for you that so many others don't. From a certain point of view. It's very kind of you to put our minds at ease.

- Oh, I'd love to. Reading a tarot is one of my favorite things. I'm into all sorts of mysticism. I can do the spirit board in the tarot. I can roll bones. I can do all kinds of stuff. - Whose bones do you be rolling? - Oh, I'm not sure. - And this ritual you have will no way curse our souls. - That's not, why would it ever curse your soul? - I don't know. You never see it coming. It's just the chieftains with their rituals.

And then suddenly everybody's gone. That's such a sad story. Anyway, so we're going to do a tarot card reading now. Please, we would love that. Let's head on over to the table. And immediately you feel the lights begin to dim. She takes you over to a circular table in one of the corners of this train car. And the...

the lights dim and begin to flicker a little bit as you look over towards Philip and you realize that you are the only people in this train car. Philip is gone. And so with him is the sound of jazz as all of a sudden the ambiance in this trailer changes.

And Adela sits down in front of you, and that perky energy that she had before, she somehow finds a way to rein in as she pulls out a deck of ornate cards, a silver gilding around the edges, as...

She looks down at them and closes her eyes and she begins to hum along to the song that plays in this car, but from where? You have no idea. She breathes in and out as she thinks for a while and you begin to hear her muttering things. What could their fate possibly be? What are they doing here? Where does this all end? Did they come here for a reason? Is the future looking bright?

And she begins to ask all these questions, and you begin to notice that as she takes this deck of cards in her hand, she begins to shuffle through them with one hand, very tactfully, as she reaches out with the other and occasionally places her hand on some point of your body, almost as if she's channeling a bit of your energy. Before, after touching each of you individually, she begins to shuffle the deck, and then...

Takes about two to three minutes of almost silence while she shuffles the deck in front of you. And then with her eyes still closed, she places down one card. The Fool. Oh gosh, The Fool.

"That isn't so bad, actually. I was just kind of hoping for a little bit of a... a little bit of intrigue." "No, the Fool's... the Fool's quite interesting. It means you're on a journey." "So I guess that does mean that you were supposed to be here." "You were... you're on a new journey. You're stepping out. You're... it's a long journey, I think." "It's clear..." She holds the card up in her hands. "It's clear you were bound for Wickormore Hollow." "And a brand new life. Starting over."

Leaving the life you knew behind for something new and different. Maybe not on your own accord, but because that's what's meant to be. That's what's supposed to be. This is a good card. Everyone likes a new journey, right? An adventure and travel. And that's exactly where you found yourself. Well, it's technically correct. And it was upright, so that's nice. The tower, upright. It's another upright card. Interesting. It's a...

The towers kinda hit a miss. In this case, she feels it and you see that her eyes almost gloss over and become a little misty. Almost as if she's reading more into the cards than just their interpretation, but seeing, like Philip said, beyond the veil. Seeing in a way that other people can't see. You're bound for sudden, imminent change. Chaotic and maybe even violent. There's a villain, not just one, but six.

- What? - Six villains. - Huh. - These the beasts that your husband was speaking of? - It could be. There were people going missing and there were beasts in the crops of Phelan. Maybe that's on account of six different villains. And the sudden change, maybe you're the ones that are gonna bring it. Change for the good, I hope, right? And you watch as her eyes gloss over just a little bit more. And when she comes to, she looks a little more detached.

Change for the good, I hope. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that was the tower upright. One for each of us. We'll take them on. Yeah. It's a fair fight, is probably what that card means. Of course. But we'll do the last one, and this is, I'm sure, going to tell us that everything's going to be exactly as it should be. And that's the devil upright. It's called the devil scare. Yeah, it can have a lot of different meanings. Let me just take some time to...

Oh no.

You're here to fix the problem, not become it. I'm going to get myself another drink. I'll be right back. Yeah, all right. Yeah, so we got the fall. You're on a journey. New things, new life. You got the tower, the sudden imminent change. Chaotic, impossibly violent, but that's you fighting the bad things and the temptation, but you'll surely overcome it. Yeah, I'm sure you'll overcome it. You speak of temptation.

Oh yeah, well I don't speak of temptation, the crowds speak of temptation. Of course, and no one is perfect. We all have made mistakes in our lives. I don't know, I think Philip is pretty perfect. The point is, we learn from those mistakes and we don't make them twice. So temptation will not be an issue for us. Oh, I'd love to hear that. Well, I mean, here's the thing, you know, for some folks...

temptation is no problem but you know I've been faced with temptation quite a few times in my life and I've generally lost most of the time do you have any other insight in terms of like what kind of temptation we're talking about so I can pair myself against it oh it's hard to tell the cards they give you an idea of what's to come but they're not gonna give you a play-by-play

But at least now you know. Temptation's in your future, so you've got to be careful any time it rears its ugly head. But you all look strong, and you seem so kind. I'm sure what these cards mean is that you're here to solve the problem. To fix it. The difference this time, Briggs, is that we stand together. We'll go to Wickermore, we'll face these six villains, and we'll bring peace back to this land of Druskinvault.

You know what, Yorga, you're right. You know, the Six of you would totally stop me from, you know, giving in to my temptation. I feel strongly about that. And almost as if it is fate itself, the sixth tenet is to think ahead. You've recognized where there may be a weakness and you can fix that. You can think ahead and prepare yourself for whatever comes. We're going to be all right.

Oh yeah, no, I'm not afeard. Farron, why do you look so afeard? I am feeling pretty afeard, as you say. Oh, we're all afeard. All of us are afeard. I'll admit I'm also afeard now that you've admitted it first. I thank you for speaking in solidarity with me. Solidarity, that's what we're here for.

So yeah, could you, you know, you can see beyond sight? Could you like peek around sight a little bit more just to make sure like, oh, it's a great card actually. Temptation can be a good thing from a certain point of view. I'll spend some more time with him and see if I can glean anything else. While we're on the topic of tenants, we might as well think of number seven and that's to remain positive. All right, this is going to be all right. We're together. We can do whatever may come our way.

There is a fate that's been woven for you. The fall, the tower, the devil. You just have to keep moving forward until you figure out what it is. But I can feel it. Whatever's pulling you towards Wickham or Hollow, it's pulling you there for a reason. It brought you here for a reason. And I think it's because...

All of a sudden, the train charges to a halt and the table slams up against the side of this room. Adela goes flying as all of you are hurled this way and that. You see glasses and bottles and shards of everything in this room just flying here and there as you hear the grinding of the wheels of the train on some tracks far beneath you.

You hear Adela call out for just a second, and then nothing. Suddenly, your entire world lurches forward violently, sending the table, its cloth, and the entire deck flying into the void. And you can hear what sounds like a loud screeching of brakes upon wheels as the cacophony of the upturned dining car roars around you. I need you all to make a dexterity saving throw at disadvantage. Oh!

But I don't want to do that. Oh, I should hold you well. I'm doing double 17s! I don't care. I got a 14 and a 15. That's pretty good. And Dex saving, Dex you say? Dex I say. Whoa! I got a 19. That wasn't even possible. 12. 14. Natural 1. Oh, yeah. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Anyone who's within 10 feet of me gets a bonus.

- You gain a bonus to the saving throw equal to my charisma modifier with a minimum bonus of plus one. You must be conscious to grant this bonus. So you get, you all get plus four. - Ooh. - If you're within 10 feet of me. Which you may not be if you went to go get a drink. - Catch me, Berrius. - This is when Lethika dies in this one. - I'm fine. - I couldn't figure out why my dex was so high. - Did anybody roll 16 or did anyone roll 15 or less?

- Damn, you went with the plus fours? - I got a natural one. - I got a 29. I'm moonwalking Michael Jackson by the hand. - Yeah, 25. - You take 14 points of bludgeoning damage. The rest of you take half.

Damn. As you are rocketed around this car. Ugh! Should I reset my health? Yeah, yeah, you should. Should we just-- Yeah, you should. Long rest and then take the health away. Oh, I made a copy first before you lost. Oh shit. Okay. Well, it's fine. No, I know what I was at. I know what I was at. Okay. Oh, is everyone all right? Lethka, where are you? I'm here, I'm here, I'm fine. I dropped my drink.

As you crash into the void that surrounds you, all finally comes to rest. All right, once more, sorry, I lost, I'm trying to do music. All finally comes to rest once more. Then you hear it, the shrieking wail of what you can only presume to be the whistle of the Ghostlight Express, but sounding more like a chorus of wailing souls than any sort of sound made by a normal device.

When it finishes its mournful blast, a rectangle of light appears several feet from you as a rush of cool air surrounds you. The door to your car has opened, and outside is a night illuminated by the light of a crescent moon. Looking around you, you see that Philip and Adela are completely gone. There is endless black void in all directions: overturned chairs and tables,

It's tossed this way and that. The only path in front of you is out of the train. Have we been tricked? Where did they go? Hold on. I grabbed my chunk. Sorry for this, Melf. I apologize. You must find a better way to secure the chunk. I mean, I've tried roping it down. I've tried staples. I've tried glue. We'll work on it. All right.

Gorsh, I'm fine everybody. Thank you for asking. You're the only one who stood at the end of all that. I saw your dance moves. It was quite impressive. Thank you. You know, I gotta bring a little bit of the bard pizzazz. But this is a very serious situation. The train breaks suddenly and the entire car exploded and our very rich and very attractive patrons are nowhere to be seen in the void.

Get ahold of yourself. And Virgil's still here! Can anyone see what's outside? Remember, they were thrown from the train car. I would, at Yorghrim's insistence, step from the train car quickly, assuredly, and try to look around into the darkness to see if I can see anyone. You step off the platform of the Ghostlight Express and find footfall upon a forest floor as another gust of the shapeless night wind whistles past you.

And in a breath, there is no train at all. You are all alone in a deep, dark wood. Fragments of glimmering moonlight breaking through the gnarled canopy. Look about, and it is easy to see. There is no sign of Philip or Adela anywhere. Wait, we were just on a train, and now we're here. I don't understand. Do I still have the glass that I was holding? Roll a dexterity saving throw to see if you can hold on to it.

That was almost good. Plus four. That's right. Ten. No, you don't. You drop it just in that moment. At least the glass was real. Does that happen with genuine, real trains that rich folk ride? You just get kicked off suddenly in a spooky wood? Did it collide with something? I mean, it stopped so abruptly. There doesn't seem to be anything around here. I don't think so, Pauline.

It definitely feels like some kind of trick. And take it from us, a couple of fellas who've been tricked before. Isn't that right, Marius?

We learn from our mistakes. Exactly. All right? Remember that. Yeah, well, clearly not, because we just got freaked. Look, Lion and Sinker! It does feel a little familiar. Well, no, maybe this is just how it happens. Maybe we ran out of time for any proper information sharing or safety measures, and we just had to get kicked off the spooky wood, and maybe we're in Wickermore Hollow.

I think we've just got to pay attention to what Lady Adele was telling us. We've got to keep moving forward. It may be a test. A way of testing our abilities. A way of seeing what we are made of. It is no accident that we woke up with no understanding of how we came here, only to inherit this charge. Perhaps there's a trail or some sort of marker, and we can maybe find this Wickermore Hollow.

Let us keep our eyes open. We should stay at the ready if a beast haunts these woods. Did you say there were footprints or something? Oh, no. No? I'm sorry. I thought you said prints or something. I'm going to look around in these dark, dark, spooky woods. You begin to walk and make your way through the trees. Tall trees.

giant trees that reach up towards the sky, the gnarled canopy shrouding you from the darkness of night, but in doing so, making it even darker where you walk. The sounds of the forest echo out around you, and occasionally the sounds of the beasts and creatures that live within these woods, some louder, some softer. And as you move forward, you hear strange noises.

Noises from creatures unlike any you've experienced before, but much deeper into the forest than where you are now. Almost as if they're keeping you at a distance, but making sure to let you know that they're there, they're watching, they're waiting. You walk through this forest for 15, 20 minutes, 30 minutes. Time starts to feel like it slows down as the progression of night doesn't seem to change.

The moon hangs overhead, but it's hard to get a look at it through the thicket of the canopy of these trees. But it doesn't seem to be moving at all. No progression from night to day. You walk for 30 minutes, 45 minutes to an hour. Feels like you could walk forever, slowly. And then eventually, you see two large flickers of light off ahead of you.

soft orange glow of what can only be candlelight or lantern light. And for the first time walking through these woods with all of these unfamiliar sounds and the darkness closing in around you, you feel there's someone else out here in the gloom. Do y'all see that? The lanterns there in the distance, yes?

Lanterns, maybe. Lights, for sure. Some kind of stagecoach maybe to pick us up? Maybe Philip, you know, wasn't messing around and he arranged something for us. Remember, there are foes in these woods. That's right. Six of them. And if people have been going missing, we should be on our guard. That's right. Steal yourselves. And maybe we can get their attention cautiously. Should I sing a jaunty tune?

I see no reason why we wouldn't put on a smiling face to introduce ourselves should they be allies. Yeah, I could use a nice little tune. Yeah, I wrote a real upbeat jaunty tune about the tarot reading we just got. Tarot or tarot? Yes. I'm playing my banjo. Sing me a song, you're a singer.

Do me a wrong, you're a bringer of evil. The devil is never a maker.

♪ The less that you give, you're a taker ♪ ♪ I'm realizing how threatening this is sounding ♪ ♪ It goes on and on and on ♪ ♪ It's heaven and hell ♪ Okay, somebody stop me, I'm sorry. - That's enough, that's enough, Jericho. Thank you for that. - But I'm trying to get their attention singing to these people. - And you're moving closer? - Moving closer, playing, plucking my banjo.

You make your way closer and the flickering light gets larger and larger and larger until eventually you are close enough that if it weren't for the light piercing through the darkness and casting a shadow on the individuals behind them, you would be able to see who you're standing in front of. But honestly, even if you could, the light is just so beautiful.

You stare into the flickering of the orange glow, and I need you all to roll a wisdom saving throw at disadvantage. Plus four if you're close to me. I'm not close. It's not any save. I'm close. It's our protection as long as I'm conscious. You just gotta be close to me. I love paladins. You said wisdom.

Oh no. No, I got double twos. Double twos. Plus four. Yeah, well, I mean, plus... Actually, well, I actually have a shitload. That's actually crazy. With a two, I got an 11. Great. Because I got plus nine total. That's amazing. I got a 14. So hopefully 11's good enough. 12. I got doubles yet again. Double 14s. Nice. I got double 10s.

- Wow. - Weird. - Oh. - Wisdom, you say? Wisdom, that's a 14, 16, 20. - Wow. - Farron and Jericho, you stare into these lanterns and you realize that the glow is intoxicating. It's charming, even. It's hypnotizing.

but it's not working on you. You begin to look around the glow to see who's holding the lantern. Is this on a carriage? Is it moving on a person? It seems to be quite stationary as you walk towards it. However, as you're in the midst of these thoughts, Brigsy, Marius, Lethika, and Jorgren. I got a total of 22. I rolled a 10.

Fuck yourself. - I'm sorry, I should have been more clear. - You should have been more clear. Thank you very much. - I think I'm with these guys. - You are with them. But you're distracted by a stick you stepped on on the ground and you're not paying attention to anything else. - Wow, it's such a lovely shape.

- Is that a frog? - I was going to make that joke! Damn it! - Oh, it's just a leave. - It is a leave. - The three of you on the loser's side of the table. - Good night, did my right, did my right. - Whizbrews. - Whizbrews. - Of course, yes. - I need each one of you to describe a person that you trust. - Oh.

King Victor Denathrius. The person that I trust more in this entire world that I would do anything for. Yes. What does Sir Victor Denathrius look like? Now, he's an old man.

I see staging, but he continued to age. And he is my brother, not blood, but in relationship. And he's graying, but he's still strong. And he looks like he is filled with purpose. And even in his old age, he looks like a very strong ruler, someone that you immediately would trust. And that is how you remember him.

And so it is shocking when you see him standing in front of you, holding up this lantern that's illuminating two beams of light. And he looks sickly and he is struggling to hold the lantern up as he tries to call out to you, but his voice catches in his throat and he just waves you towards him as he turns and begins to make his way deeper into the forest. No, no!

- My king! - Victor, no, please come back. I can help you. It's me, it's Marius, please come back. Victor, come back, please! - Marius, what are you saying? - And I begin to follow. - Who is he talking to? - He's speaking of his king, it makes no sense. - Did you see someone? Marius! - Marius, wait. - And Marius begins to rush Briggsie. - I might think of me mum.

Aww. What does your mom look like? She's a crocodile person. Maybe she's wearing a bonnet. She's got a bonnet, and she's got a mu-- a mu-mu. That's exactly what I was thinking, a pink little bonnet with frills. Bridget, you lissies, crash! Get back here, you chintz! Making biscuits. And you see that her nightdress is...

You see that her nightdress is just as you remember it as you look forward and you see that she is standing there in front of you. How she got here, you're not sure, but she looks confused as she holds up a candle and she looks out around in the dark until she spots you and you see the look of excitement on her face, of joy to see that you are here. And she...

She looks towards you and she motions for you to follow her and she reaches down and she pulls out an old book, a book that you remember. She used to sit by your bedside every night when you were just a wee boy and read to you these fairy tales, these stories. And she motions for you to follow her. She turns around and she shambles into the woods.

What are you doing here? Does Dad know you're out here? You're gonna catch a cold! And I'll just go after her. Now Briggsie is gone too. We need to keep up. What are the chances that King Victor De Nathans and Briggsie's mum are here? That's great, wonderful news. The tarot reading was a good thing. We must find out more. Open your eyes.

I would see a young orc from my clan, the Shadestone clan, called Darrow, who I was a shaman, an exalted position, but left me separated from my clan. But this was a young orc.

orc that had begun to show signs of a similar power of communicating with the dead that I had and would start to come out to the tombs with me. - You are confused by what your friends are saying as Brigsy runs past

these lights and into the woods, following behind Marius, because what you're seeing is not at all what they're describing. You see the small form of Darrow, and to the rest of your group, Darrow may seem like a standard young man, because being an orc, he stands, this child stands so much taller than the rest of your humanoid companions.

but you see the boy that you remember. And in one hand, he is holding onto a shovel that he's placed on his back. And on the other, he's holding up a lantern that was clearly made by hand by him to replicate the one that you carry with you, almost imitating one of his favorite people.

The smile that illuminates his face is huge as he looks towards you and motions for you to follow him into the woods before turning around and scampering off. The sound of the shovel clanking echoes throughout the forest as he runs off ahead of you. Darrow, you survived! No, wait! I chase after him. The three of you begin to run.

The other three of you watch as your friends barrel into the forest. They veer off of the path and directly into a thicket of woods and following the strange light

all of them calling out different names and acting in ways that none of you would have expected. The three of you do not notice the others around you as your eyes are solely locked on to this person that you trust, this person that you know, Briggsie, your mother,

You can hear her voice as she calls out and tells you how much she's missed you and she can't wait for you to see dad. And you just have to follow her just a bit longer. They're staying in this cute little cabin up ahead. He's been talking about you. It's going to be so great to catch up. Why have you been gone so long? You look like you haven't eaten. It's been so long. But you can never quite get to her as you continue to run ahead. You have a kettle on?

I could use some tea. Marius, you follow behind Sir Victor Denathrius. And though he's old and feeble now and occasionally lets out a cough, he seems to be moving far quicker than you would expect of his old legs. But you know that he has the heart of a lion and he would never show weakness if he could avoid it.

And you get the feeling that as quickly as he's moving, it is solely to hide the weakness that's inside of him as he calls out to you and tells you how proud he is of you and that he's so happy that you found him and he can't wait to tell you about what's been happening back home and that it is a glorious reunion to be reunited with his old friend and that unfortunately he is getting old and he needs your help.

to please just follow him a little bit longer until you can come to a place where he can rest and he can explain to you what has been happening. I will, I will. I will, please, my king, please. I know it is improper, but Victor, please. I am your brother. Wait for me, wait. As this little orc boy runs up ahead, he giggles and laughs.

You hear him occasionally call back and tell you, "I've missed you so much. Can't you see what I've made? I'm just like you now, Jorgrim. I'm just like you. When I grow up, I'm going to be just like you. Don't you worry. You can teach me everything, but while you've been gone, I've been learning all kinds of things on my own. Just follow me up ahead just a little bit further, and I'll be able to show you everything that I've done. You're going to be so proud of me, Jorgrim. So proud of me. I promised you I wasn't going to let you down."

Just follow me up ahead a little bit longer. Darrow, please. I have to know, how did you survive? I can't wait to show you, Jorggrim. You're gonna be so proud of me. As he runs up ahead and darts into the thickets. The three of you watch as your friends completely disappear from sight. We have to go quickly.

We have to find them. Do they all run in the same direction? Mm-hmm. Okay. You watch them all as they're all following the same two lights that you can see. But they didn't split. They did not split. I'm off. Follow, go, come, go, go. We've got to go. And Darrow, I've never heard of a young man so strapping or ever before. Oh, that's

- That's probably a bad sign. And I'll follow after you. ♪ They say that life's a carousel ♪ ♪ Spinning fast you gotta ride it well ♪ ♪ The world is full of kings and queens ♪ And I just continue like that. And I'm giving us some chase music as we continue onward. - You are giving some beautiful chase music as you follow along, but these lights are moving incredibly quickly. And whatever spell these lights have put on your friends, which clearly at this point you can see they've done something.

to Marius, Briggsy, and Jorgrem, is making the move with an unnatural swiftness as they are just barreling through the forest. And it is hard for you to catch up, but you are able to at least keep them within sight. And then eventually, you all barrel out into an open thicket in the forest. The three of you look forward.

Actually, I need the three of you to each roll a d20 for me. Sure. Oh boy. I got a three. Nine. 20. Oh! Beautiful. Congratulations, or I'm sorry to hear that. We don't know what that means. We'll see. The three of you get to the thicket first, and as you barrel out into it, you stumble into each other, and there's almost a bit of frustration. Why, Jorgim, you look over...

Marius, why are you here? You don't know this person. Get out of the way. I need to get to Darrow. And Marius, you are unsure as to why Jorgren is here and rushing towards this man, this brother. And Briggs, the same thing. Are they...

what could they possibly want with your mother? As you all slam into each other. - That sounded awful. - You know what I mean, goddammit! - I guess they really want tea too. - But you slam up against each other for a moment before-- ♪ Briggsie's mom is gonna go ♪ And Briggsie and Jorgrym, you,

are frustrated for a moment before once again these people have stopped and they're all just staring at you. And your eyes drift from them to the lights that they carry. And then that is all the two of you see. But Marius, you watch as your two friends just stop and stare. You don't care why they're there. It doesn't matter. You're not here for them. You're here for this man.

You watch as his knees buckle and he falls to the ground. No! And the light, he almost drops the lantern that he's holding as he is now too frail to hold it up. As you rush towards him in an attempt to lift him to his feet, he puts one arm around you. Yes, yes. And you can feel the frail weight of his body. It's just us. It's all right. As you try to pull him up, the three of you

arrive only in time to watch Marius step into the jaws of a beast.

You now realize the lanterns were no flames. They were enormous circular eyes of a huge shaggy wolf-like monstrosity with a mouth a third the size of its body, radiating with the same bewitching orange glow as its eyes. Marius is transfixed on this enchantment in the light and with a loud snap of the jaws, Marius is devoured and swallowed whole.

The beast lets out a snickering howl as it licks its chops with the tongue at least two feet in length. As the wild eyes get more maddened, its hunger has not been sated. I need everyone to roll for initiative. - The last thing my friends hear me say as I am holding my king and trying to support him is to say, "It's all right, Victor. "No one will see. "I'm here for you. "I will make sure that you are healed.

- Snap! - He's like, "Nan, he's like..." - His tongue turns into stairs. - Well, shit. - Yeah, I mean, I kneel down into the creature's mouth to get to my friend and snap. I'm toast. - I'm so glad it was you. I know how much you love to fail at things, so.

I'm glad it's me. I'm glad it's you too. I've been rolling like fire until I rolled initiative. It's very, very narrative these days. I was going to say, I've had a lot of hot rolls, just not at the right moment. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of Avantris and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas. Shroud over salt marsh.

You can also go to thecrookedmoon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tome for Dungeons & Dragons 5th edition. And don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you! 20 to 25.

- Do I? - I forgot my roll. - You've been fired, so. - I just re-roll when I happen. - Can I re-roll? - Yeah. - Well, it's been nice, everybody. - No, no, no, you're hired, you're hired. - Oh, thank gosh. - To get my coffee. - Thank God.

More whiskey, please! Head of special projects, welcome! All right, fine. You got a 20? I didn't love you so damn much. I got a 20. 15 to 20. 17. 18. Fuck! Do you hand this to me so I can top you off? No. You can top yourself off, dammit. But I could use some of this. Now that you mention it. 10 to 15. 14. 12. 12! What guard? 12.

Lethka has been fired. - Six. - Oh gosh! - From orbit. - From orbit. - That'll make it easier. Perfecto. You all stare at this creature as it consumes Marius' whole. Brigsy and Jorgren, as this happens, you...

feel the hold that this creature has over you, ripped from you, as you shake your heads and you realize what you are staring at. Brigzzy, your mother is no longer there. Jorgren, this child from your past is no longer there. You are staring into the eyes of a big, bad wolf.

The fuck? Also known as Wolf Bro, thanks to Derek. It's just Wolf Lord. Oh! No, it's Wolf Bro! I thought it said Wolf Lord. Me too. Can we do Wolf Lord? No, it's Wolf Bro. It's Wolf Bro. It looks like Wolf Lord too. My bees look like love.

My bees look like a mannus. That's Wolf Lord. It's Wolf Bro. It's very obvious. That's Wolf Lord. You see? My bees.

- Manus! - Manus has been shat on. - What do you mean? - Manus! - Joe Jericho! - You haven't even done it! - I love Jentro. - You're not even close! - Jentro's not even close! - Join our venture, Jemco. You two can get access to the Shadow Realm. - No, he does go. - Come on down to Jemco. - No, this one is Jer-o-ho. - Jer-o-ho!

- What is this one? - I don't know. - Can I? - I don't know. I'm in fast. That's all cops. I'm right in fast. - This is all cops. - I was channeling my inner doctor prescription. - I can't do that. - Madness beginners. - There we go, perfect.

- Oh man, that's so funny. - Furthermore referred to just as man. - Good grief. - So I don't have to go through this. - Derek works at Starbucks. - I do work at Starbucks. - With that, you-- - I am Somanus Renf. - Somanus. - The left three fingers of Latham.

And I am Lethu Flethitha. What about Farron? Oh, that'd be so funny if his card was the other one's spell. You got me pretty good. I could have connected this into famine. It looks a little like famine. It looks a little like famine from here. I don't know what's going on. Okay. All right. Boy. On the back, it looks like Famjin. Oh, great actress. F-A-M-J-N. I enjoyed her in Nick Tuck.

I enjoyed her in GoldenEye. Fam-gen? Is she a real person? Thank you. Yeah. You don't know Fam-Phoenix? Fam-Phoenix. Jean Grey.

- Oh! - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You got me, you got me. - Okay, anyway, let's finish this session. You are all staring into the eyes of a big bad wolf as it bears down what? - Do I know that it's eaten him or would I have seen that as like Darrow getting consumed? Do I know that bears are getting consumed? - What I will say is you come to as Marius is being swallowed. So you watch as your friend is being swallowed by this creature.

And you feel that control fade from you. You got a 20, yes? - God, I have no recollection. - It is your turn.

Release him, you foul beast! And I'll charge straight at Wolf Bro. And as I'm running, my eyes will shift to kind of a swirling, misty gray as smoke will start, well, like mist will start to billow behind me as I charge forward and it starts to swirl around me as it oozes from the lantern that hangs just over my shoulder.

- Yes, you do attempt to do that. However, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw as you look into this creature, into its face and what big eyes it has. - Oh no, it's handsome. Oh no, he's odd. - Not the vibe we're going for. - Oh no, he's super odd. - He's big and he's bad. - Oh gosh, my weakness.

- An incredibly charming wolf in the woods. - His dread is not in the new cab. - I'll cut you off. - Are we using twists here or no? - No. - No. - No twists. - No twists. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No.

You stare into the eyes of this creature, these big eyes, and you once again feel hypnotized by the light. You shake your head again and you realize that this forest is playing tricks on you. There's no wolf here. Marius, you're sure as fine as Darrow stands in front of you again. - Okay. - Uh oh.

I'm sure Marius is fine. That didn't look too bad. There wasn't even a wolf ever at all. And if there was, he was incredibly handsome. Darrow! I found you. He opens his arm as if welcoming you for a warm embrace. Oh no. Can I move towards him? You almost feel compelled to move towards him. I move towards him.

to try and meet his warm embrace. With your movement, are you able to get within five feet of this? He's already five feet. I started right in front of him. He's climbing in his jaws right now. The tongue comes out of the exterior. I need you to make a strength saving throw, please. These teeth make really good handles. They can get right in.

Jeez. I've rolled six every time I've rolled this dice! Yeah, that's rough. Mikey, spike my dice! Oh, are those from Gen Con last year? Those are from Mikey! Oh my god. I knew this day would come. The trap has set many of us free of the king. Fuck you, Spider-Man! Fuck you, Spider-Man! What was this? Strength save? Eleven.

- Damn, son. - You move towards Darrow and you watch as he extends his arms for a warm embrace and you rush towards him and you wrap your arms around him. The rest of you watch as Jorgren, at first charging towards this wolf ready to strike, you watch as his eyes seem to change as he's hypnotized by the light within this creature's

overly large eyes, and Jörgrim instead rushes straight towards it as the wolf opens its mouth and swallows Jörgrim whole. You feel both of you on the inside of this wolf's stomach feel the charm leave you as you feel Marius, as Jörgrim slams into you.

as he is swallowed whole. That is, however, your turn. Can you believe how many times we've both been eaten by a creature? I can't believe it's happened again. Man! There's a lot of big stomachs. He's husking bald. Upbeat jazz starts playing inside his stomach. I'm sure Briggs will be here shortly to cut the stomach open and pull us out.

- Mom, is that you? - And that is Marius' turn. - I'm called Manus now. - Oh, I'm sorry. - Hang tight, Jorgren. I'm getting us out of here. What kind of actions can I take? - You can attack the wolf from inside. - I draw my sword with the absolute fury of Lathander and I make two attacks at where I approximate its stomach to be, perhaps. Just wildly trying to get out.

- Oh, well one of them's a natural fucking 20. - The other one is a 16 to hit. - 16 hits. - Okay. - I did the math and you have 31 twists of dread. - Yes! - You can dread that natural 20? - I know that I can. I'll let the first one slide, but the other one's going forward probably won't. - I am going to...

I'm gonna smite the crit though. Let's fucking go. Yeah, so the first attack will be 1d8 plus 7. I need to figure out what I'm doing here. Which is gonna be an 8, because I rolled a minimum damage. And then the next attack is going to be... Please pardon me. It'll be... I spend a spell slot to do 2d8 radiant damage. So that's gonna be 4d8 radiant damage plus the 2d8. So it'll be a total of 6d8 damage.

Damage for the crit. Oh my god. Seven, eight, nine, 10, 11. Wow, I rolled very low. Plus seven is 18. Plus seven is 25 points for a crit. That's trash. That little chick could be worse. I got my armor's rusty, my sword's rusty. I'm shaking the rust off. You can only go 25 commoners with that. The wolf, you watch as you see the belly of this wolf

throb for a moment. And then you see as it begins to heave, almost as if it is going to, almost as if it's going to throw up. - Can I say some cool ass shit? - Yeah. - Okay. On my grip, my sword begins to glow with almost a blood red magic with gold flecks of light. - And I'm using a dread while I lay on myself. - Okay, I know your groom is there, so I have to say some really cool shit. And I say,

I am Samarius Renathir, the chosen son of Lathander and the right hand of King Victor Denathria as I strike and do some really

You do, and you do a significant amount of damage to it, and it does look like it is going, it is about to retch, but it is able to keep both of you down. Damn. That's some cold-blooded shit to say to this wolf before you gutted it. If Jorgurm hadn't been there, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. That's my turn. Thank you.

Farron, actually, before you go, Farron, you all watch as this wolf looks like it's about to rush up your friends. It is very clear, I would say to all of you, that Marius and Jorgrim are fighting back. But then you begin to hear the sounds of Harvest's song.

as from around the forest, the edges of this thicket, you hear the singing of what sound like feminine voices. As from all around the glade-- - What the fuck? - Oh no! - Harvest maidens begin to peer out of nowhere, walking towards the wolf, sickles in hand, floral wreaths atop their heads,

beautiful white linen dresses adorn their body as they walk barefoot towards the middle of this thicket. - That's pretty cool, okay. - And they begin to surround you. - Oh no, they are hot. - Hold on, let's get a better look.

Oh yeah, oh god. I choose to surrender. Can they just take me back to wherever they came from? Yeah, I'm done. I'm done for. I'm gonna design that art. Let's see. You have sent me a DSM? There are four of you on the, so two of them are going to be on Lethika. Ooh.

They don't need to get in range. They have ranged attack, so they're fine where they are. Good to know. Two will be on Brigsy. So two on Lethika. Two on Farron? Yeah, so two on Lethika, two on Brigsy, one on Farron, one on...

Whoever that other person is there. Jericho. - Jericho. - Just a lonesome friend. - Oh no one attacks me, oh no one did. - Okay, so both of them are going to hit on you, on you, Lethika. And you immediately hear the sound of this harvest song and it,

enters into your mind and you feel as if your thoughts are becoming jumbled and you become confused as you look around you and what was a dark forest is now a beautiful, lush spring glade in the heart of Midsummer and then back to this dark forest that surrounds you. All the while, you hear the sound of the wolf howling off in the distance.

and you are going to take some damages. - I'm good. I'm just fine. - 14 points of psychic damage. - I knew it was gonna be 14. I didn't have 14, I didn't touch it. - And I need you to make two wisdom saving throws. - Whoa, two? - One for each of the harvest maidens, yeah. - Fortunately, I'm a cleric, so I'm sure this will be fine. I'll take an 18 for one and an 11.

The first one, you hear the song louder in your mind and you are able to shrug it off. And as you do, you look towards the second maiden that's walking towards you, sickle in hand, a bundle of wheat at her hip. As she sings out towards you, her eyes, that same illuminating glow is that of the wolf.

and you feel your mind muddled almost as if you had a strong drink, yet stronger still. And then you look towards the wolf and there you see someone from a memory, a memory that you thought you had buried long ago. And as you look towards the wolf, you see the form of a family member, someone you love standing there where they should not be able to stand.

is this person reaches out their arms to you for a hug. - Good. - And you are charmed by the wolf. You feel compelled on your turn to move towards it. - Towards the wolf? - Towards the wolf. As you no longer see a wolf standing, but a figure from your past. It'll be up to you to divulge what you see, should that ever happen. Then we have... - Farron. - Yeah, we have one on Farron. That one is going to hit, so you're going to take

Nine points of psychic damage, and I need a wisdom saving throw from you, please. Is it against a spell or medical something? It is. I'm gonna advantage the die. Oh! Is that a fader ability? A jaunty fader ability. Ooh! What'd you say, wisdom? Wisdom. Wisdom. Wisdom. The one on you, Jericho, misses.

- 20. - Oh, gosh. - That succeeds. You feel the music trying to hypnotize you, but you are able to shrug it off as you pull moss down over your ears and muffle the sounds of their singing. Both are going to hit on you, Briggsie. - Dry shield.

They both miss. And the singing continues, but you, Lethika, feel yourself pulled towards the wolf. I'll shield my mind! Beren, it is your turn. You handsome wolf. So I'm going to-- Seed mcgroyd, sir! Be gone!

- Don't be husband. - I can't breathe. - I think I'm gonna kill my jaw.

I am going to with my ears covered look towards the wolf and

"Spit them out right now!" And I'm gonna slam my druidic staff on the ground, which has a deer's antler skull on the top of it, and it will glow green as well as my own satyr antlers. And I will run towards the wolf and make a primal savagery attack on it. - Oh, that's sick. - She good. You're good, you're good.

- 13 plus eight, 21. - 21 hits. - All right. - His AC is 16. - Ooh. - Four now.

Okay, I will try to remember that. No going back. Christine, for now? For now. So he gets weaker over time. It's good to know. Good to know. You would want to like spinach and Popeye. His tail gets bushy. So as I make contact with him, my...

My antlers will gouge into him and it will start to spread sort of a-- Where are you attacking? Oh, the wolf? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I don't know. Go for the crotch. I was going to go for the neck. I feel like you tried to go for the neck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a paladin today.

This will take acid damage, but thematically, he'll start to get spores embedded into his flesh. Oh my god. I love that. That is what happens is you--

As you rear into, you rush forward and using your antlers, you rip into the flesh on his neck and he lets out a loud howl as he feels the biting pain of your primal savagery doing how much damage? 12. - Oh, did you do your blade form too? As a bonus action?

I forgot what that was. It's been a while. It's been a while. Good actions. No, no, features. Oh, features. Features. Yeah, it's a bonus action. I have to be doing the Halo of Spores? Is that right? Yeah. I have to be doing Wild Shape to do that. You can use it as a bonus action, right?

- Oh, can I? - Malky just played one of these subclasses in our Patreon hangout for all the dinosaurs. - Oh, that's right. - Oh, no, that's wrong. - Sorry, sorry. - He's too tall. - I thought it was a bonus action. - I played Briggsie the Cutlass Crash. Oh, I wasn't a Cutlass Crash. It was pre-Zombie Briggsie. - I actually played an Athena's Boredruid named Felpip. Played a tragedy. Anyway. - And that is my turn. - That is your turn. He is going to use another one of his, let's see, where is he at?

So there are two of you inside of him. That's right. Rigsy is fairly close. Let's find out if he can take three. Who are the two outside of him right now?

Are we outside next to him or outside? It's Briggsy and Fearne are the closest. Briggsy and Fearne are right next to him. Okay, he's going to turn-- Briggsy's closer, though. I mean, Fearne is closer. Where are all these puppets coming from? I'm not even Italian. Yikes.

- He is going to move towards Farron and he is similar to what you've done where you have rendered his flesh with your horns. He is going to reach down and make a claw attack against you. 23 to hit. - Yes, indeed it does. - 23 doesn't hit, my max HP is 51. - 13 points of piercing damage. - Uh oh.

She said. And is Briggs within five feet of you? Mm-hmm. He takes the same amount of damage. What? How much? 13. Oh my god. Oh god, he does splash damage. Oh fuck. 13? As his claws rend into you, he swipes across and rends Briggs's flesh as well. Holy shnikes. Okay, so he's... Well, fuck.

That's his legendary action. It was Faryn's turn, so I guess it's his turn. Oh, fuck! No!

We're dead. This is going to be the shortest. Yeah, we're dead. No, we're not. The shortest comeback of all time. I'm sure you're fine. I've seen this dojo. Looking at you, Faron, he is again going to attempt to make a claw attack against you. Rolling a natural one, he does not make a claw attack. Oh, gosh! But he does have two attacks, so he is also going to go in and attempt to bite you as well.

- Oh man, that was a four plus 11. Does a 15 hit? It does. - It does. - There's no way that can-- - That's what I was thinking. - You can use your reaction to scream. - Fucking sucks! - Ah, shit! - Shit! - God.

doing 16 points of piercing damage. Fucking handsome wolf bro. Chill out. God. Actually, I can use a reaction. Can I do that? He's cheating so big. Can you say a little sports?

Oh, you need to have him use your symbiotic entity first. Oh, word. 16 piercing damage. That's why it's good to come out alive. Jesus. Plus 11 psychic damage from the eldritch glow from its mouth. Yeah, I died. And I need you to make a wisdom saving throw. I can't. She's unconscious. You're unconscious?

No, you still can. You still can. I just fail it? Well, it would be to-- No, no, no, you can pass. Really? It would be to be charmed by him, so. Oh, yeah. Consider me charmed. I am considering her charmed, yeah. Ferry Ferry gets chopped. And that's its turn. Wait, did she get eaten? No. No, she's just bitten. Oh.

Can Marius and Jorgrim hear me inside? Is it muffled? It's muffled, but they can hear you. You'll hear kind of these muffled twangs and I'll go...

That's like head stinking cloud.

That's actually really good. That's really good. On the wolf. Uh-huh. The wolf, in an attempt to make him puke up my friends. But how is that going to affect Brigsy and-- I would like to cast it far enough back that it doesn't hit Brigsy, but if you know. That's what's happening. Sometimes there's collateral damage. It's a constitution saving throw.

I rolled a natural 20. Damn. We dread that. You can't do that! Yeah, we dread that. We cash in six dreads in. I will use my bonus action because it's a Nikki campaign and I'll say: Oh, Farron, you didn't hear my song about the wolf. Okay, I'll start again. And I'll start playing Hungry Like the Wolf again as I'll do Healing Word on you and I'll do a little bit of healing. Thank you.

That's it. There is a stinking cloud on top of it, though. Oh man. You get six points of healing. Thank you. The bare minimum. Oh, actually, hold on. I'll cast it at second level.

- I mean, she's not dying anymore. - Would the stinking cloud affect any of the,

the maidens off to the side. I guess not. - What's the radius? - What's the radius? - It's 20 feet, so I don't know if we have that. - Oh, that definitely hits these three. - Well, if you can center it like here, it might clip her. - I'll try to clip them too. - Oh, well, no. - Yeah, you can do it. - It's not gonna hit them. - I'm trying to make them puke up, wolf bro puke up my bro's. - So you just wanna try and hit one. So the one that is there fails.

Number two. So if they are capable of puking, they're just puking up their guts. Does it do any damage at all? No. Oh, well. It stuns them though, right? It stuns them, yeah. Okay, so that one is stunned. Does Wolfro have an empathetic gag reflex? Is this a sympathy puke? Yeah, it's a sympathy puke. Oh my god, I see my farting reaction. Oh no!

That's my turn. That's my one weakness. I'm a sympathetic. Quick, somebody get a pencil. What?

And with that, it is Jericho's turn. He's used all of his legendary actions. So Briggsie, it is your turn. Oh, fuck. If it's a 20-foot radius, do I feel like I'd hit all three of these and not get us? With what? A 20-foot radius spell. Yeah.

What spell? I might get me. I'm gonna want to step over here. She's a conscious. I try to grab your ankle for support and you just kick me off. Sorry. Colin's gloves in it. You napping.

I will step over and then I will cast, I'll say, "Oh no, I've been tricked before, but not this time." And oh wait, do I get, am I charmed at all? Am I good, am I free to act? Oh, no, thank you for reminding me. I was in game state. What big eyes you have, you're within 30 feet of the wolf. I am. I need you to roll a wisdom saving throw.

Oh boy. I almost. Come on in, Briggsie. Now it's a party. Just like old times. You really can fit three guys.

- I think that counts within 10 feet of Marius, right? What do we think? - This is a nightmare. - Where are you? - I'm here. It's like two diagonal, as long as half of my space is within 10 feet of Marius. - I would think like at his core. - Wait, but that's not where you started. That's where you moved, right? - Oh, I started definitely within 10 feet of him. - Yeah, okay, so then you would've made that roll with Marius. - So, I'm proficient.

- And Bitsy would say, "That's where I'm a Viking. "Let me check. "What's a Viking?" So three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12. Does that pass? Devin Mistress? - She's in her form tonight. - I think the answer is wolf no. - You step over Farron's form and you...

at this creature and then off towards the maidens and you ready yourself to cast the spell as you hear your mother call your name and you immediately jerk your head back towards the wolf, but there is no wolf there. What is Farron laying on the ground for? Why is she throwing such a tantrum? This is not at all what you thought that it was. It's your mother waving towards you for a warm embrace.

What beautiful eyes you have. And I open his mouth like a cartoonist. We just wave at you. No! No!

- Not yet. You do use your movement to get towards him. He will use his reaction to attempt to consume you because that is what he likes to do. - He sees Marius and I at his childhood table drinking tea with his mother. - Oh my God. - And we're waving, but in reality we're like, no! - No, turn back, turn back! - Oh, we catch the lads!

Where is it? Blah, blah, blah. Sorry, sorry, sorry. This is getting out of hand. I hope she made Nekbet breakfast. If you know what I mean. I do. I don't. With what big teeth you have, because you were within five feet of the wolf, his reaction, I need you to make a strength saving throw. Goodbye. Strength saving throw. Yeah. Well, we'll do that.

- Whoa! - It is plus four, right? - Hold on. - Yeah. - Oh! - You get plus four. - You're within 10 feet of me. - Is that on every save? - That's so fucking good, man. - I can use a dress. - He's just so radiant. - I didn't use it on the 20. - No, that's fine. - That's fine. So you use it on, you know, that's fine. On my 17. - 20.

- Okay. - You can join me again if you want. - No, no, that's, the dice have decided. - You got 37 of them, so. - It moves towards you, it lunges towards you, but you just see your mother rushing towards you with an open embrace, and you,

As your arms lock, you feel one of its teeth puncture into your arm and it jolts you awake as you look up and this is not your mother. This is the wolf that you had been fighting and you wrench yourself out of its grasp and tumble backward five feet. And you are-- Oh, fuck! You are not consumed by the wolf. But my turn is over. But your turn is over. Okay, that's it. Lethika. Lethika.

- What's happened? - I need you to roll a wisdom saving throw. - Am I not still already charmed? - Something has happened. - Oh, you are charmed, yeah. - I was charmed. - Yeah, so no, you're charmed. - Can I save? I'll save now. - No, no, no, no. You have to make your movement towards the wolf. You are compelled to move towards the wolf. - I see, when we first came into this field, the wolf, and I see it.

consume Marius. And I then see Jorgrim. I see Farron go down. I see all of these things and then these voices singing and suddenly I turn and where all of this action was I see a family member. Someone who I knew from a distant past. A forgotten past. Impossible. How? How are you here? I know your face.

It is me, it is me, Lethika, please. Please, see me, see me, hear me. I race forward, I forget, I drop my chakram, I just dart as quickly as I can directly to the voice, to the wolf, not heeding any of the action or seeing anything that is around me. I immediately sprint to run towards-- - Enroll a strength saving throw for me, please.

- Paws for her. - Paws for her. - I don't think it's gonna do nothing. - No, we're all about to be forcefully ejected. - You rush forward and you immediately throw yourself into the arms of this person that you love.

into that warm embrace, but it is not an embrace that meets you. It is the giant wet maw of a beast as you hurl yourself into the open mouth of this creature. And as you feel yourself sliding down its throat, you crash into Marius and Jorgrym inside of its stomach, and you immediately come to and realize that you had been charmed by this thing.

the person that you had seen wasn't there. It was all an illusion. Lethka, that's your turn. Jorgrym, you are inside the belly of the beast, so you are going to take five points of necrotic damage. Oh. Oh fuck. You're in the deadlights. Damn shit. Sounds hardcore.

I will, once again, because it dropped because I didn't hit him, I'll reactivate my mist form, and I will recklessly attack at the inside of this wolf's stomach. Twice, if I could, in fact. Let's fucking go. Woo!

The first was natural 20 you can dread it, but I'll be very sad The second with it after 22 I'm just saying I'm just saying it's out there, you know It's out there. I mean you

- The Throxema ignites with Lathander's fury as I draw upon Marius's abilities right next to me. - That scream was one of the cutest things I've ever heard and it came from you. So for that reason only, I will not dread them. - Scientists have measured the scope of sound in full spectrum and there's a specific tone. - Mace is natural 20. - No, no, no. - Only he can achieve it. - So here's the thing. Mace talks like this. Hey, I'm Mace. Mace screams like this.

I think even something happens when I crit. I don't know if you have critical yet or now. Does it matter? You got ready to crit. Ah.

Something happens when I crit though, something happens when I crit. I'm sure of it. No, one level shy. I'm sure of it! Okay, take a look. Just give me one second. I'm so sorry. I'm sure of it. I'm sure. From one barbarian to another, I'm pretty sure it's level seven. I could be wrong, I could be wrong. I'm gonna take a look. On your turn, you score a critical hit with a melee weapon or reduce a creature to zero HP. You can make one melee weapon attack as a bonus action. Great weapon master attack.

Oh, oh, well that's different. That's not a Bumper ring thing. Well, yeah, I knew it was there. I don't even know what my damage damage are. Your advantage again, your advantage again. Make an attack for bonus action. I do need to know each individual attack. Don't total up the damage. No, no, I won't. I need each individual attack's damage. It's just the detail. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're at 20. I know it. I feel it. I feel the triple crit. You're going to literally one-shot this guy. Come on. No, but that was close as hell. That's crazy. That's a miss.

That's one hell of a miss, but that's okay. You made up for it with double fucking crits. Yeah, that's huge. Alright, I don't hit that one. In my excitement, I missed him. Oh, it's 9th level. Nice. Big money. So, first crit would be...

Why? Weapon Master. You reroll ones and twos, I think. Or no, is that a fighting style? It might be. No, I don't think it has anything to do with it. So, but I would plus the five twice? No, no, no, just once. So the first hit is 17. 16. 16. Shit. 16. The first hit. Okay.

The second hit. Alright, alright, big money. Here we go. No whammies. Oh! That's pretty good. 22. On this. 23? Plus 7. You got the plus 7? Plus 7. Because you're raging. 5 plus 12. Plus 7?

Oh. Yeah. This one's 17. I'll leave seven or eight. All right. So it's, so 24 then. I didn't have the plus two before. Yeah, they actually plus two from the last time. So there's plus two to the first number too. 18. 18. 18 on the first one. 18 on the first one. Second one is a 24. 24.

You take your shovel and you slice up once. You hear the wolf howl into the darkness and then you rear back with the next one and you slice into it doing a significant

amount of damage. The wolf, you feel the stomach, the wolf's stomach tighten around you as it squeezes all three of you as he begins to retch.

And with a four, he does not, he fails his constitution saving throw and all of you feel as his stomach contracts over and over and over again, squeezing you as you are, as you burst forth from his mouth as he vomits you up all over Farron.

Yeah, all three of you. All three of you are thrown out all over Faron. Are we prone? Yes, you're prone. You all land on Faron. You're covered in stomach acid and bile and the bits of other animals that he's eaten. Womp, womp, womp. Faron actually just dies. Because you're always like-- The tooth is out. I feel like I'm at the sticky ball at McDonald's.

You should be ashamed of yourself. It's a diaper, idiot! Stop! It's not a diaper. Stop. You all watch as his belly continues to constrict, and you can see that

He is suffering significant stomach pain. Your attention is drawn to this portion. It looks to be a weak portion on the wolf's body. - I bet, I just tunneled straight out of him. - And that is Marius' turn. - I would like to attempt to stand up and double my efforts as I move towards him 10 feet, less than half my movement. And I'll make two attacks. - You need to roll a wisdom saving throw.

That's surely going to pass. Plus nine is 27. Ooh, yeah. Yes, you look at this creature, but now that you have been inside of him, you are no longer, shut up. I'm just vibing over here. You don't look at Paul and you just jump. You've been inside of him, just jumping over. That's a dab of it. I got it out of my system. I've been trying to make a joke for the past five minutes, and I can't get it out.

- Yeah, something bad before, but you know now. - Yeah, yeah, you're unaffected, keep going. Roll your dice. - I'll make two attacks. - I'm mute now. - That's pretty bad. The one is a 15 to hit, the other is only an eight. A 10. - Both of those miss.

- I pass my turn. - You are covered in wolf bile. The acidity of its stomach acid stings at your eyes as you attempt to swing towards it, but you are unable to find purchase on this creature. Farron, it is your turn. - Okay. - I need you to roll a wisdom saving throw. - Okay, and that will be advantaged.

- I don't find any reactions. - Oh, that did a lot of good. - Oh no. - No. - 16. - 16 hits? - Oh, sorry, 16 passes, yes. - Okay. - Fine, sorry, I'm playing. It hits and passes. - It hits me. - It does hit you. - No, it passes, and you are,

you are picking yourself up off the ground, your most recent brush with death making you feel exhausted. - Them all falling on top of me. - Them all falling on top of you, also almost debilitating you, but you are able to push yourself up off the ground and you have your faculties about you.

Get off of me, you! You lot! I will push my way from the bottom of this pile. Oh, sorry! Stand up. On the tombstone. My bad. My bad! You have to stop wearing that. My brittle bones. I will use-- It's my entire character, I can't. My wild shape. I can use that, right? Without-- Yeah. Okay, I will use my wild shape to

my blightly spores. So you'll start to see sort of slowly like black spores will begin releasing from me, from my body.

and I will gain 24 temp HP. - Amazing. - It's just severe acne. - It is. - That's better than I thought. - Wow, it really hurts right here. - Yeah. - Oh god, I hate those. Okay, that's enough. - Yeah, that really sucks. - Is that your entire turn? - Yeah, I think that-- - You can do a bonus action for a spell if you'd like. - Can I? - Yeah, I was like-- - As long as it's a bonus action spell, yeah. - I don't think I can. - Do you have any bonus action spells?

- No, no, no, you don't. - No. - That is my full spell. - All right, perfect. It is the wolf's turn. - He needs to make a constitution saving throw against the stinky, stinky stuff. - Well, who else does? - Oh. - Just him? - Oh, as we enter. - I missed anyway, it was fucked, it didn't matter. I'll make sure I remember. - He rolled a five.

plus, what did you say it was, constitution? - Yep. - So nine. - No, that fails. He's puking and retching up. I believe he's stunned. - His stomach is trembling as he continues to vomit all over all of you. Every couple of seconds, you're just awash in stomach acid and bile. - Ouch.

And that's, he's stunned. That's his turn. He should take, so now that I have this activated, he should take Halo of Spores damage. Oh, he's not in the stunned condition. He just spends his turn puking until the next turn. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. He's stunned, so that's the end of his turn. Nice. That's huge, actually.

- He's turning into a Lady Gaga concert. - You should take five points of necrotic damage. - How much? - Five. - Five. Oh, if it fails the con saving throw, I'm sorry. Roll a con saving throw, then you should take defeat. - Well, I think he fails automatically because he's stunned. So I will say yes, it works. - Okay. - Five points, sorry. - I'm going to look as this wolf is puking

And as I see it kind of opening and it's retching, I'm gonna look in and I'm gonna-- It gets its legendary actions back, but it's stunned until its next turn, I'm assuming. No, it just spends its actions. Oh. So yeah. So after this, it can use it. After my turn. After your turn, perfect, thank you. I'm going to, I don't know if this will work, but I'll try to like look down its throat and I'll say, "Well, Virgil, why don't you give me a big old squawk?" And as I'm gonna do like a power cord on my fucking, what you call it, on my throat,

on my banjo. No stairway. I attempt to cast shatter inside of its stomach. So you're attacking its stomach or you're attacking its throat? Its stomach. I'm trying to basically, to pop it basically like a balloon. Is my attempt. It's a con saving throw, another con saving throw, 16. Oh, con saving throw. I rolled a three, so seven. Well, gosh, he's going to take a bit of thunder damage. Not very good.

- In there. - Eight, 11, 12 points of thunder damage. - You let loose the torrent of sound from your banjo, a power cord of sorts, and you are shocked by the amount of damage that this does. It does significantly more than you had expected. Would you imagine it being double what you had expected? You said 12? - Yeah, 12, did I say 12? Yeah, probably 12. - So that'd be 24? - Wow. - Yes, 12.

And you hear the wolf howl out as it is clearly in, it clearly has a tender tummy, which also might be the name of one of its breeds. - Oh, poor guy. - Yeah. - Prigsy. - Prigsy. - Do I perceive what these,

- What are these minion type folk doing? - They're attempting to charm, I will be honest and say I forgot that they were there. - We didn't forget. - But they go on his turn, so thank you for reminding me of them. I'm gonna have them go now. Can you change it back to the one I can see? - Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. - Thanks, if we could just keep it on this one, that would be awesome.

There should be, what, six of one, two, three, four, five, six? Six of them. So each one of them is going to roll on each of you. The one on Latheka fails. Nice. The one on Farron succeeds. So Farron. Come on, man. What? I can't help it. I think you might be dying now. No, you are going to take four points of psychic damage, and I need a wisdom saving throw.

- The one on Jericho fails. - Oh gosh, thank you. - The one on Briggsie fails. Holy shit, the one on Marius fails. - Ha ha! - The one on Yorgrum fails. My rolls were four, one, five, six. - Well, you just hit fair. - 21. - 21? And you are able to stave off the charm, but you do take the, I think it was like four points of damage. - Like four points. - They don't move?

- They don't, no, they don't need to, they're ranged. - Like turrets. - My mind, the harvest is here! - Brigsy. - But before you go, Brigsy, he is going to use a legendary action and he is going to reach down and make a claw attack against you. - Against who? - Brigsy. - He's at disadvantage.

- Yeah, we have Breezy's here, so he could hit. Unless his reach is 10 feet. - No, his reach isn't 10 feet. - Bring it on. - So it's going to be against-- - Lethika's in range. - Yeah, it'll be against Lethika as in disadvantage. - Now it's gonna be an actual 20. - Take her, take her! - Now it's gonna be an actual 20. - I'm using a dread to reroll because I got a five. - It's disadvantage against anyone who's not men. - Destroy each other.

My lowest was a 15. - Your lowest was a 15? - My lowest was a 15 plus 11. - Damn. - Oh. - So the total isn't 15. - No, my lowest roll wasn't 15. - See how that works there? - So it is going to hit with its slashing claws.

- It's gonna roll max damage. - It's not. Five. - I'm putting 14 damage. - Eight points of slashing damage to you and to your groom who is next to you. - Oh. - As it swipes through you and gets both of you. - I like that, neat. Thank you for that. - You're welcome. - Now it's your turn. - And that's one of its legendary actions. - I will pull out the flintlock that's in my sash. I will point it at it and I'll say,

Wait, do I need to make a save? Am I good? Yes, you do. You need to make a wisdom saving. Okay. Oh yeah, I'm good. 20 whatever. 27. 20 blunch. You resist what big eyes you have. I will cock the flintlock and I'll say, I'm not getting tricked again and I'll pull the trigger and I will shoot a sort of wailing sound

like a ball of almost neon energy will shoot at him and will hit him and kind of coat him in this sort of neon light and I will cast Hexblade's Curse on him. Then I will walk forward and from my hand will materialize, as I close my fist, the Cutlass, a gigantic sword that I wield with one hand and I will deal it for two attacks. Nice. Okay.

I don't... Is it an 1899 or a 1920? I think right now it's just 1920. 1920, 1920, 1920, 1920. 1920, 1920. Oh dear, damn. Okay. They might both hit, though. They look pretty good. 16 is the essay. 8 plus 9 is 17, right? That's correct. Okay, both hit. So, that is 1, 2, 3, 4...

- Five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, not great. 19, 20, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31 points of damage. I just do a quick like this. - 31? - 31. - Huge. - You do a significant amount of damage.

as you slice through parts of this wolf, aiming for the wolf itself. And yeah, it does a significant amount of damage. And it is Lethika's turn. - That's my turn? - I'm gonna back up by killing Lethika. - Do I have the sense, have I deduced that

looking at this beast, this creature, this monster, this aberration, whatever it happens to be, will trigger another one of these charms where I might see something that I don't want to see? I would say yes. That's easy enough to determine that while you were looking at it, its eyes are very easily charming. But that you imagine if you couldn't see it, there would be nothing for it to charm you with. My eyes are clouded with tears.

having seen what I've seen in such a brief period of time, I can feel mud and the earth around me. - You are no longer wearing your mask. - I'm no longer wearing my mask. It's somewhere 10, 15 feet behind me. But I do know that this creature has hurt me deeper than any blade could. And I'm going to crawl forward, keeping my eyes on the ground until I see feet.

And then I'm going to attempt to rest up and grab this creature and cast a spell once I get within range of touch. Damn. I will scrape forward, and as soon as I see a talon, I'm gonna reach up and I'm gonna cast Inflict Wounds at a third level. Let's fucking go! That's so sick. On his belly?

Damn you beast. You may be a creature of the night, but I was. - Let's go with a... - 16 is the 18. - Oh yeah, so we're at natural 18. - Big money. - Come on, come on, come on, come on. - That's actually only gonna be 20 points of necrotic damage, but that's decent money. That's fine money. - It's acceptable money. - That's acceptable money. Thank you for your d10. - Oh, of course.

And yeah, I'm not saying anything. I'm holding back tears and just pouring what I can. - You're pouring the pain that you feel inside into this curse, into this wound that you open on this wolf. And you do not look into its eyes, now understanding how this beast, how this creature functions.

and you reach up and you rend its flesh, doing a significant amount of damage. The wolf lets out a painful howl as its stomach continues to convulse, as it's dry heaving into the air. It is looking very wounded. It is going to lash out, however, and it is-- who's directly in front of it? - Leveka's on the ground, prune.

Yeah, either me or her or somebody. Yeah, it's going to reach down towards Lethika and attempt to make a claw attack. It's advantage, 'cause she's-- Natural 20. Oh, well. What, you said it was a disadvantage? No, no, no, no, I was saying it's a normal, it's just normal, so you're fine. Yeah, it's a natural 20. Yeah, well, you know, it wouldn't be a game of Lethika if I didn't get crit on.

Derek, you're just very crit-able apparently. I know, everyone just likes to think of steaming hot clay on my chest. Well, to be fair, I didn't roll that well. 13 points of damage to both you and Faryn. Is it slashing damage? How much damage? 13. What type of damage? Slashing. Slashing damage. They're resistant. They are resistant. We are. Oh, so I'll just take it. Mace! I rolled it all down! I rolled it all down! Look at this! I'm so proud of you. Inceptible brawler.

I will say when I was eating, I forgot that I had advantage on strength. You round up, right? So I did forget that. That's okay. 80% is still good. And your turn, man. It's your turn. Thanks. You're a girl. Gotta stand up. I'll get gentle. All right, yeah. Stand me up. Marius, help me up. Do I reach out when you do this? Yeah. Dylan. Dylan.

You've been working behind a desk. 17, 16. Okay, okay. So first one hits. First one hits. Kind of normal. Kind of nice. That's you. Oh, okay. This one hits too. This is, yeah, 20-something. Yeah. Five plus seven. First hit is 12 damage. Okay. And second hit is...

- Do it, Jorgrim. - 13, 25 total. - Wait, the second hit is what? - 13. - 13, thank you. You climb to your feet and you once again grab your shovel and slice into this thing. Blood flies everywhere as it coats you and your friends. The wolf stumbles a bit, but it continues to blink its large,

glowing eyes as it's gnashing maws frothing with rage as it looks around at all of you. It looks very, very wounded, but it is hungry and determined.

It is going to, can you just put it back? It is going to look over towards you and it is going to use its legendary action. It's going to make a claw attack against you. I think you're advantaged on this one. Yes, reckless attack. Because you were barbarous. Well, yeah, and 'cause I don't think the ancestors-- 23? Correct. 23 to hit? Yeah.

- Let me just check really quick. Yeah, that'll hit. - That hits. - That hits. - It's going to do 11 points of damage to both you and Marius. - Oh! - Jeez Louise. - I will react with my mist form. - I love it a lot. - To reduce the damage to Marius. - Oh, nice. - We'll see. - Yeah. - Hold on.

Yeah! By four points. So as the claws come down right before they land on me, I extend the mists out to Marius, and you'll see these kind of like ghouls and ancestral spirits swirling within it, and they'll attempt to take a portion of the... They'll dampen the claw attack. Yeah, and the claw attack will pass through them before it lands on Marius. And that happens.

And now it is Mary's turn. Do I have access to everything that I can do? I don't see why you wouldn't. Well, because, you know, some of it's like from Edgerton. That's, yeah. Canary is beatbox. It's late, so yeah. It's an Edgerton Midnight One-Shot. I have been wounded by this creature. Things are going rough. I got eaten. I'm upset. And...

There's blood. There's the smell of blood that's in the air. And you can see Marius' neck tighten and the veins in his neck begin to kind of bulge and grow and the fangs in his mouth

begin to lengthen as he looks to this creature and he feels a hunger well up within him and almost without being able to think about it, the urge overcomes him and he looks at this creature and you can almost hear him mutter, I'm sorry, as I begin to feast on the creature. Oh! Oh!

Oh no! And I will be using my dark gift and use Crimson Feast. As an action, I can bite one creature within five feet of you and my target must make a constitution saving throw. It's gonna be DC 15. And on a failed save, you'll take 6d6 necrotic damage and the life essence is drained and half as much on a pass. And it was what kind of constitution? Yeah, 15 constitution. 14. Oh!

I sink my fangs deep into the neck of this creature and drink deeply. That's gonna be eight, nine, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, plus eight is 23. Plus another nine is 32. 32 points of necrotic damage as I heal that much. I would ask you how you want to do this. All right.

- I think you've already explained well enough. You watch as, just as Adela had said, temptation overcomes you. Your thirst for blood overwhelms you as the scent of iron is thick in the woods this night. You let down your guard and bear your fangs as you become the creature in the night.

And with one quick, monstrous motion, you find yourself attached to the throbbing vein in the neck of this beast as you drink it dry. You watch as, all of you watch in horror as Marius rips the vein from its neck and begins to consume and gulp down the pain.

pint after pint of blood until you see the wolf go weak and limp in his arms. But Marius does not stop until there is not a single drop left in its monstrous body. And where there had been this gigantic wolf, one that had tricked you and charmed you and lured you into the forest, there is now nothing but the frail, lifeless carcass of a completely empty monster.

Marius, what have you done? I've... I've... I've made a mistake. I've let my baser instincts take over. And you killed that wolf! Great job! Yeah, you should make me do that more often! No, no, no. I've lost control, no! You saved us, Nim. Well done. I need a moment. Vergil's so proud of you, he wanted me to tell you.

- We execute all the-- - No, I just like, I just run around like, ow! - You notice-- - Blood splurts and fountains into the night. - You are all distracted by Marius and his willingness to give in to temptation in this moment of weakness. You are distracted by the blood that coats his mouth and his armor that

You don't notice the maidens that have disappeared from this thicket. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. - But you do notice the change in Marius. Where had been his red eyes, the eyes of the dampier?

are now illuminated with a soft orange glow as they get larger and larger and larger. - Oh no! - Similar to the eyes of the wolf that he had just drained dry. Marius, you look out around you and you can see through the dark thicket of these woods. There is so much more light here than there had been before. You can see for what feels like miles away. And then,

You look up. With your new sight, the sight of this ravenous beast of the wood, you peer through the forest itself, the bark, branch, and leaf, and you see the sky of Druskinvald, bound in its eternal night. And the horror is what you see in that sky. You look up and you see the moon. It is indeed a crescent.

but unfathomably massive and gnarled and with the face of a leering witch with wild eyes filled with madness and malevolence a bent nose and a huge twisted grin you stare up at the crooked moon and the crooked moon stares back i need you to roll a d20 okay okay all right nobody panic i'm sorry d12 nobody panic we're good three

You watch as Marius stares up towards the sky and you all look as well, but you can see nothing through the gnarled branches that have created a canopy over you. Though you know that the moon must be up there somewhere, Marius clearly sees something that you don't. And then you see as his eyes begin to change again and return to that soft red that you know all too well. But you too begin to change, Marius.

as you become overwhelmed with spiteful envy. You wish to discard your current items and covet what your party members have. - I will have already dropped the sword and the shield that I know when I have attacked this wolf, and I'm covered in blood, and I'm raving about this moon that I can see that no one else can see, and then my eyes return to normal, and I catch myself for a moment, and I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't understand. - Marius, are you feeling all right?

Yes, and I noticed the chakram that might be by your-- help me find my mask. I would be honored, and I will walk over to Lethika and offer up my hand to help her up. Let's go find it. It must be around here somewhere. I was taken away from myself by the eyes of that beast.

I will attempt to comfort her, but as we're looking for the mask, I will almost hope to find it first so that I can take it and steal it from her without her knowing. - Okay. I will say roll an investigation check. - And I'm helping. - And at advantage because Lethika is helping. - Oh my God.

- That's a double 16s. - Ooh. - That's a double tonight. - Investigation plus zero though, so just 16. - A 16, especially even though your eyes have already begun to return to normal, you still have that preternatural

dark vision and it is easy for you to locate the chakrams. They shine in the few bits of moonlight that are piercing through the canopy and you catch the glint of the metal in the soft grass and you're able to rush towards them.

- And the mask that he's looking for? - The mask is not far off from it. They were both dropped in a similar position. - I will point out the chakram and motion for Lethika to go find them. And while she's busy doing that, I will pocket the mask. - Oh. - Do you see anything?

Anything at all? Any sign? Do you think perhaps those... those strange women, the visitors, do you think that they perhaps have... have my mask? It is very important to me that I keep that. Even with my unnatural vision, I was able to spot the glinting metal easily, but nothing of the mask. It's very possible that those women, whatever they were up to, were also here to take our belongings.

Were they all just figments of our imagination? Why do you all slip inside that wolf mouth? I feel like there must have been something really inviting in there, like a nice pleasant hot spring or something. A pleasant hot cup of tea is what they would say. I saw me mum. What? Did you fellow see something similar? I saw my king. I saw someone from my past as well. Oh my gosh. Wolf entranced us, drew us in. It was enticing.

Gosh, even the wolf knew that I didn't have no loved ones. Surely there were very dark magics at play, and whatever those women were up to was certainly no good. If anyone has your mask, it must be them. Gosh, and no wonder folks are going missing here. They probably have the mask. If folks are getting missing, and it almost killed all of us, and there's six of us, and I'm just one big bad wolf.

Imagine just normal townsfolk. It'd be a buffet! So we figured that those people that came out to try to kill us, they were from the town that we were supposed to go to? They must have come from somewhere. I can't just be out here in the middle of the woods. Suddenly, you hear a voice in the darkness. A song drifting on the winds.

The words of a song exulting harvest time and the union of sister and sister, hand in hand, in a ring surrounding you on a small, in a ring surround you on a small yet beautiful voice. It clearly is the singing of a little girl. And as you all turn to look towards the very center of this, as you all turn to look towards the very center of this clearing, you see a small girl, clearly ghostly,

transparent and very similar in look to the women that had been standing around you during your fight with the wolf, wearing the same white linen dress, a halo of flowers adorning her pale yellow hair plated on either side of her face as she looks towards you with sad yet comforting eyes.

And she sings out this little song. She reaches out her hands, asking for an embrace. Reminds you very much of the wolf, the imagery of what he had shown you, these loved ones that led you into his arms and into his maw. And as you look closer at her and think back towards this, what now I would say become clear to you, specters that he had conjured,

in his battle with you, it becomes clear to you that this little girl fell to a similar fate. Your mind goes back to the train, to Adela and Philip, and what Philip had said to you about a beast in the woods and children gone missing, a blight on the crops, a plague on Wickermore Hollow. Now as you stand here and you look at this poor girl looking only for the warmth of an embrace, you realize that maybe Adela was right.

Maybe you were sent here to do good and to help this place. Maybe this is your grand adventure. She does not stop staring at you as she holds her arms out, hoping for nothing more than a simple hug. - Does everyone else see a little girl? - Yes. - We do. - I won't hesitate. I'll walk forward and start to approach the girl. - I don't think that's a little girl. - Come, little one. Little one, please. Is everything okay?

She looks towards you and she has a scared yet soft smile on her face, but she says no words and you can see through her. You can see the grass at her feet, the trees behind her. And as you reach out to touch her,

You can feel that she's there, but she feels like at any moment she could be blown away by the wind. Her arms are still held outstretched as if she wants nothing more than a hug. Don't be afraid. Stay here with me, little one. Everything is going to be all right. And I'll...

crouch down and sort of get almost into like a squatting position and just really extend my hand and be like I'm trying to keep not to keep a distance but I'm trying to let her feel like she could come towards me if she wanted to and I'm not trying to like be separate or anything like that it's just I'm not going to immediately dive on her I'm also just going to give her some space and let her take the next step she sees what you're doing and she reaches out a hand to grab yours and feels cold

and your fingers are able to interlock with hers, but it also feels almost as if they're sinking in to her fingers. There are clearly fingers there, but they could so easily disappear. And as you hold onto her hand, she moves closer to you and presses herself up against you, and she wraps her arms around you and holds you tight. It's going to be okay. Everything is going to be all right.

- Do I feel? - You go in to hold her? - Yeah. - You wrap your arms around her and for a moment you feel the form of this little girl in your arms. And then you hear a small voice. - Thank you. If you make it to Wickmore Hollow, tell my mom that I love her and I'm sorry. - And then just as quickly, you feel nothing at all as a burst of wind blows through the thicket and where this girl had been standing.

There is no one and nothing but the six of you. - There's nothing to be sorry for, little one. - I'll be keeping my eyes down because I would view Lethika's face as seeing a woman indecent because I know that's a deal. So with the mask, I will not make eye contact. I will not look at it. And I'll say, "So what was, was that little girl had up by that there beastie?" - That is what my gut tells me, yes.

Well, maybe that tarot reading was talking about this sort of thing. That's what our fate is, is there's a lot of transformation and bad stuff and we just gotta kill a whole lot of wolves and monsters. This wasn't just any wolf. Maybe this was the first of six villains. They've already begun to do good works. Only five more? That is... that must be right. We have defeated a big bad wolf.

Perhaps there are only five more like it to worry about. A gust of wind circles through the thicket once more. And Lethika, roll a perception check for me, please. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

- Why am I rolling like such garbage? I'll just take an 11. - That's good enough. It was only 10 that you needed. - Oh! - Damn. - The gust of wind blows through, and once again, this feels more akin to something intentional than natural. And for a moment, you feel like you hear singing, and then you hear the little girl's voice yet again.

Follow the song of harvest time, harvest time, harvest time. As it fades off into the distance and as the wind finishes whipping through this outcropping, you turn your face, you turn and look towards where you had heard the voice and you see a small trail leading off into the woods that you don't remember seeing before. And as you listen, you hear the faint sounds of harvest singing.

Does anyone else hear those voices on the air? Yes. Oh, God, I don't like the sound of this. First ghost kids and creepy women with, you know, trying to lure us away, and now we hear singing? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I intend to follow the path. As do I. I want to find my mask, find out who these people really are and where the real threat lies. Could also be Wickham Ward.

Could take us to the hollow that we seek. That's why we're here! The little ghost kid and the songs that she was singing! That's truly it! And maybe they'll have your mask, Miss Lethika! Oh, sorry. Thank you for reminding me. I'll take out a black handkerchief or a piece of fabric, something like that. I'll let my hair down.

and then I'll pull that over and secure it using what I would normally secure my hair with. Just long hair, white, and my veiled face. Does this help, Jericho? Oh, well, now I can look you in the-- well, not the eye, I mean, it's from the figurative-- I can look at your face-- Anyway, it's fetching. It's a good new look. And I'm sure we'll find your mess someplace. It's fine. I have always been able to see well in the dark. Shall we go?

Yes. We sure we can't get back on the train? I look behind me. I'm sure that opportunity is long past. All right. Lead the way. All right. All right. I'll have my slip mark. I'm looking for any glowing eyes in the woods. Okay. But I'll follow Marius. You continue to move in the direction of the singing, the exaltations of nature and the harvest beckoning you almost personally to its rapture.

You feel almost pulled out of the gnarled wood as you emerge from the treeline, leaving the darkness as a distant bad memory or faded nightmare in an instant. Instead, you feel warmth of body and soul as the shadows dance, cast by the thrashing flames of torches, braziers, and bonfires. Among the dancing flame are dozens of dancing humans in ritualistic garb, most wearing masks of animal, plant, and things older than this place.

The way they move is passionate, vivacious, and with every fiber of their being. And as the clouds move away from the crooked moon, the terrible light casts an enormous shadow over all. And you finally realize what these revelers have been circling in their round. Towering above you, at least 50 feet tall, is an enormous humanoid effigy, a colossus of woven wood looming so large it seems as if its head might crest the bottom of the bewitching crescent moon above.

Beneath its unmoving vigil, a woman approaches you from the throng of celebrants. She wears white and carries a sickle, waving to you with a beaming, freckled smile filled with unbound enthusiasm. She stops before you as the singing in unison reaches its climactic conclusion. And suddenly, there was no more singing. All masked faces look to you. The young woman looks familiar.

as if she could be related to the lost child in the woods. As if she was the lost child in the woods. Now impossibly grown, there's nothing but joy in her eyes as she speaks. You came. You made it. You're on time for your appointment with the Wicker Man. And that's where we'll end the session. You know, I refuse.

You are denied. You are denied. We are playing for another six hours. You just kissed a Kralita! Holy shit! Oh my god. Your appointment with the Wicker Man. Fuck. The who? Well done, Nikki. Thank you! We played the Crooked Moon! Holy shit. And welcome, Kels, back to the team. Welcome, Kels. It felt so good. Thank you guys for staying late. I know we started late. We almost ran late.

Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Aventress podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin tier or higher to unlock Shroud Over Saltmarsh, a patron-exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com slash legendsofaventress. If you want to chat about the episode with the Adventress community, join us on Discord at legendsofaventress.com slash discord.

We also post content nearly every day on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, so make sure you follow our socials at legendsofadventures.com slash social. And make sure you check out The Crooked Moon so you can terrify your friends with a folk horror 5e supplement published by us. Get your own copy at thecrookedmoon.com. Thanks again, and we'll see you next time.